#I swear I’m gonna watch the show this weekend
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Jongho is jealous and Wooyoung is the cause because of course he is
drabble written past midnight
warnings: jealousy/ insecurity/ jongho having one sided beef with wooyoung/ jongho being an irritated bear
Jongho knew he shouldn’t be feeling this way- he had no reason to. He knows you love him and care about him, you tell him so every day. Never once has he felt unloved by you. But today…he was feeling insecure. And being so insecure made him feel guilty for the tiny part of him that was doubting your affection for him.
You see, today, the both of you had spent the day with Wooyoung. It really wasn’t any different than any other weekend. But for some reason, Jongho couldn’t help but hyper focus on the way you threw your head back and cackled when Wooyoung would make a joke. Or when Wooyoung would steal a bite of your food and you didn’t even seem to mind or second glance.
Now there wasn’t exactly anything strange about this- Wooyoung was your best friend after all. Jongho just couldn’t help but compare himself to Wooyoung.
Of course you didn’t know Jongho was feeling any of this yet, he hides his emotions well. But as you walked towards the cafe hand in hand, you couldn’t help but glance at him, noticing he’d been a bit quiet for the past few minutes. You squeezed his hand and he turned his head to meet your eyes. You smiled at him, hoping he would be able to read the question behind your eyes. Are you okay? He returned the smile, to which you lifted your interlocked fingers to place a kiss on the back of his hand.
After entering the cafe and ordering iced coffees- and a chocolate croissant you’d been craving all day- you walked to a table with drinks in hand. Usually Jongho liked to sit across from you, but today he’d quickly taken the spot next to you before Wooyoung even had the chance to.
You quickly fell into a conversation and Wooyoung showed you and Jongho pictures he had taken the past week.
“Hey, fix your face! Why do you look so miserable?”
“Wha-“ You lifted your gaze from Wooyoung’s phone, ready to defend yourself, only to find Wooyoung pointing his finger at Jongho. Brows raised in confusion, you turned to look at him.
“What are you talking about? My face is fine.” Jongho rolled his eyes while sipping his coffee.
Wooyoung gave you a look and teased Jongho further. “Where are your manners? I’m gonna tell Hongjoong you’re being a brat.” You watched them in amusement.
“Oh yeah? And what the hell is he gonna do about it?”
“Sell you, probably.”
You attempted to laugh, but choked on your coffee instead. Jongho patted your back as you coughed into your napkin. “You guys are idiots,” you croaked.
Before leaving the cafe, Wooyoung excused himself to the bathroom. You waited for him outside and took advantage of this moment. You grabbed Jongho’s hand and pulled him closer to your body.
“Are you okay, Jongho? You haven’t really said much.” There was a look behind his eye that you'd never seen before, but it was gone as soon as you noticed it.
Jongho put on his best face, not wanting you to worry any more about him. "Hm? Oh- yeah I'm fine, I guess I'm just a bit tired." Jongho felt his hands clam up as he watched you wordlessly examine his face.
You took a deep breath and held his face. "Are you sure? Your knee isn't sore again or anything? If it is, we can go home and I can ice it for you and I'll make tea an-"
"No baby, I'm not in pain, I swear. I was just in a weird mood, I guess...sorry." His hands were now over yours.
You opened your mouth to reply only to be interrupted again. "You're always weird, man."
Wooyoung. Jongho tried not to hit Wooyoung, but failed, landing a slap on his shoulder. "If your face wasn't so important, I'd punch you instead."
Wooyoung pulled him into a tight embrace, smacking a kiss on his cheek. "Wrong! I'm your favorite." Jongho struggled to get away, but Wooyoung only held him tighter. He loved tormenting him.
"Hey, get off my boyfriend." You pouted, reaching out. Wooyoung caught your hand and pulled you in, trapping you as well and planting a kiss on your cheek. You groaned and pinched his sides, making him yelp.
"That hurt!"
Both you and Jongho replied at the same time, "Good."
-
Back home, Jongho sat on the couch while you prepared tea in the kitchen. Soft music played and you hummed to it as you pulled out mugs from the cabinet.
You stirred the tea and carefully made your way to where Jongho sat. "Careful, it's hot."
"Mm, thank you." He took a sip and set his mug on the coffee table to cool down.
You sat down and let out a sigh of relief. The apartment was quiet and peaceful, the yellow glow from the street lights subtly peeked through the blinds. You still had this one thing on your mind though.
"So, what did you mean earlier when you said you were in a weird mood?"
"Oh-uh nothing- I-why do you ask?"
"I don't know...you just didn't really seem too excited today. You barely talked either. You can talk to me about how you're feeling, you know."
"I know, I know. I just-"
DING
The sound of your phone going off startled you both. Jongho rolled his eyes when you read Wooyoung's name out loud. He let out a frustrated sigh, which you heard.
"What? Is it Wooyoung? Was it something he said?"
Jongho huffed and tossed his body back into the couch, crossing his arms, eyes facing the ceiling. He knew he was being dramatic but he didn't care. He mumbled to himself, hoping you wouldn't hear. "Even when he's not here, he gets your attention. God, he's so annoying."
You blinked at him. Your mug now placed next to his. Things were finally clicking into place and you heart panged for not noticing sooner. You slid your hand down his arm. "Jongho..." He didn't budge. He let you pull his arm away so you could snuggle into his side. His arm fell over your body. "Baby..." He lifted his head to find your eyes fixated on his. "I don't think I've ever seen you jealous in my life."
"I'm not jealous."
"Yeah? Then what are you feeling, hm?" Your voice was soft as you spoke to him. He groaned and squeezed his eyes shut, embarrassed about the way he felt and the way he acted as a result of that. You leaned up and kissed his eyelids. "Jongho, you know you're the person I love most, right? And maybe this is toxic, but I'd burn the world if you told me to."
He chuckled and finally opened his eyes, "Please don't, we know you can't stand heat."
You bit back a smile. "I hate that I made you feel this way, bear. Can you please tell me what line I crossed that made you uncomfortable?"
He sighed and sat up, tightening his arm around you. "Honestly, there wasn't anything that you or Wooyoung did....I just- I don't know. I guess today was one of those days where I overthought everything...I'm sorry."
"You don't have to apologize, I get what you mean. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better, bear?"
Jongho thought for a moment, but eventually sunk further into the couch, bringing you with him. "No, just be here and-" DING "-and please mute Wooyoung."
You stifled your laugh into his chest. "Didn’t you say you wanted me to be friends with your friends?"
"I take that back."
#jongho x reader#ateez x reader#ateez x y/n#angst#jongho x you#ateez fanfic#jongho x y/n#choi jongho x reader#Choi Jongho#wooyoung fanfic
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Similarities
Edwin and Dream share something in common. Something more than a love of books.
⚠️❓ - Possible Trigger Warning
[ficlet contains mentions of fear/anxiety and being afraid of small spaces/claustrophobia]
•—-•—-•—-•—-•
Dream didn’t talk about his imprisonment much.
It was said mostly in passing, as a way to explain why he hadn’t met Hob when that story was told, but the how and why and other details had never been told.
Hob, of course, knew. He knew what had happened to Dream as the Being had told Hob everything. So, when he reminisced about the past, which he often did, Hob never talks about those details. That was for Dream to talk about and Dream alone, when he was ready.
No one ever expected or anticipated that the day Dream would be ready to tell someone else about it, it would be in a chaotic, noisy pub.
Dream, Edwin and Charles were loitering around The New Inn, as they usually did when it was absurdly busy and Hob needed to jump in and lend a hand.
Edwin was at the bar, reading a book Dream had produced from his library in the Dreaming, while Charles was trailing closely behind Hob, asking questions and knowing no one else could see him while Hob, who could see him, talked away.
In the beginning, the customers would ask Hob if he was ok, concerned that maybe he was working too hard and was slowly losing his sanity, but he would just flash them a big grin and say, “I’m alright. Just talking to a ghost.”
They stopped asking.
Dream was perched next to Edwin by the bar, sipping on a glass of white wine that never seemed to grow to room temperature no matter how long it sat there. He wasn’t paying much attention to Charles’ mischief or to Hob’s multitasking chaos.
Instead, he was keeping an eye on Edwin.
If you passed a quick glance at the young spirit, you wouldn’t notice anything amiss. Just a boy, casually reading his book, trying to dive into the pages and words.
But Dream knew better.
Edwin may have had the book open, but in the hour they’d been sitting there he had barely gone through 5 pages. His gaze may have been trained on the inked words in front of him, but his eyes showed that his mind was elsewhere. His jaw was tight, his shoulder’s stiff, and Dream could see a small tremor in his hands where they gripped the edges of the book.
Dream recognized this look. The look of fighting the rough waves as you tried to stay afloat, trying not to sink and drown. He himself had to tread through those rough waters until they settled.
Sometimes, he still had to.
“You do not have to read the book if you are not enjoying it.” Dream said before bringing the glass of wine to his lips.
Edwin blinked, the fog in his eyes dissipating as he looked at Dream. “I am.”
Dream raised an eyebrow. “Are you, though, Edwin Payne..?”
Edwin opened his mouth, closed it, looked back at the book, and then shut it softly before whispering, “No…”
Dream hummed.
“It’s not that it’s not a good book.” The young spirit said quickly as to not offend the Prince of Stories. “I just…”
“Are currently unable to enjoy it.” Dream finished. “Your mind is…occupied. By feelings and images of the past.”
Edwin looked again at Dream, eyes wide. “How did you know?”
“It is not often I find myself understanding how one may feel.” Dream said softly as his thumb ran up the curved glass. “It is even more rare that I understand because I have gone through a fairly similar experience myself.”
Edwin stared at Dream, who was staring at his white wine with furrowed brows. He realized, with surprise, that Dream was very much referring to his own imprisonment. “You’re…well…you’re you. How could you possibly have gone through what I have?”
Dream’s eyes hardened, growing dark. “Endless may not be able die like most creatures do…but we can be captured and hurt through the use of the occult.” White stars glanced at Edwin. “Humans often meddle with things they do not understand. You know this to be true.”
Edwin was silent for a while, turning his attention back to the book that laid on the bar counter. He brought a hand up to stroke the velvet cover and traced his fingers over the gold lettering.
Perhaps…Dream could truly understand…
“I thought what I experienced in Hell would be the trigger to this fear…” Edwin whispered after silently gathering his thoughts, his hands dropping to his lap. “But…instead…what triggered it the first time was a dark basement. It wasn’t until it happened a second time I realized it was because of that room. That room in the attic of the school where I was dragged to and sacrificed….” He scoffed venomously. “4 bloody walls in the dark overpowered all the terrors of Hell.”
“It’s frustrating…” Edwin continued. “It’s been decades since that night and the fear of it prevents me from going into any small, dark space that remotely resembles an attic. It impedes on our detective work if I cannot enter a small room where a crime has been committed.” He clenched his fists tight as he hissed, “I want it to stop.”
The dream eldritch was silent as he stared at the young, frustrated spirit. Though Edwin was over a century old and very wise, there were times where he showed that, deep down, he was still a 16 year old boy.
Eventually, Dream spoke. “I was also confined to a small room, much like your attic. Inside this small room was my prison, that was even smaller than the space it resided in.” He stared at his warped reflection in the wine glass. “My prison was a sphere. A sphere made of steel and glass…hidden away in a pathetic man’s basement where ancient markings kept me in place and where above me was cruelly decorated like the night sky to mock me and remind me of what I was missing.”
Dream let out soft sigh. “Once I was free, it took me many months to finally be able to stay for long periods in a small room where the walls felt too close and the ceiling too low.” He looked up at the ceiling of the pub. “Even now, there are times that this space becomes fearful.”
“It does…?” Edwin asked, his voice trembling a little. “So…the fear…it doesn’t leave?”
“No.” Dream replied turning his gaze back on Edwin. “It does not. Though it happens less, that fear still plagues me. It will always be there in the back of your mind, trying to drown you.”
“Then there is no hope for me.” Edwin said, defeatedly, his shoulders dropping.
Dream smiled a little. “There is always hope, Edwin Payne. That hope, that raft that will keep you afloat during those fears…that comes from the people around you.”
“The…people around me…?”
The Being turned his gaze. Edwin follow his line of sight, seeing it had landed onto Hob, who was laughing with some of his customers. The immortal caught their stares and waved. Charles looked where Hob was looking, noticed them as well, and grinned widely, also waving.
“The people who love you and care for you…they will be your raft. Your life line. Even if you have no hope in yourself, even if you tell yourself you cannot do it…they will be the hope that will tell you that you can.”
“Hob was…and still is…my raft…” Dream said softly. “He possesses an otherworldly patience I have only ever seen in my sister…and even she has her limits. He has endlessly showered me with it as he has helped me through my fear.” He turned to look at Edwin again, still smiling. “You do not have to battle those waves alone, Edwin. You have many around you who are willing to be your raft.” He placed a slender hand over Edwin’s that had loosened their grip on his slacks. “Myself included.”
Edwin opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Hob, who had finally been able to make his way down to the end of the bar.
“Bloody hell what a night.” The immortal smiled apologetically at them. “I’m so sorry I haven’t been able to be around much this evening. One of the hazards to owning a business.”
“You were around me.” Teased Charles, who had come up behind Hob.
“Look here, you little shit, that was not because I chose that. That was because you decided that tonight was the night to make ol’ Hob seem more crazy than usual.” Charles laughed as he dodged a swat from Hob, running around to hide behind Edwin.
To any remaining concerned patrons in the pub that evening it looked like Hob was scolding the air next to a shadow of a man and then swatting at a fly.
Those patrons quickly returned their attention back to their drinks.
Hob shook his head at Charles, trying to look stern but unable to as he laughed at the young ghost stick his tongue out. “To make up for it, I’ll watch whatever movies you wanna watch. No complaining.”
“Really!?” Charles beamed.
“Not you.” Hob said as he pointed a finger at Charles. “You don’t get to pick.”
“What!? Robbie, c’mon!”
“Don’t ‘c’mon’ me, you menace.”
“I’ll just possess the TV again.” Charles replied, smugly.
“Do that and I’ll invite Death over for a visit.”
The spirit boys had long since been told by Death herself that she wasn’t going to take them. They were free to roam on earth as long as they continued their work.
Regardless, Charles still paled at the threat. Death was still Death, the taker of souls, the Grim Reaper. Their non-lives were in her hands.
Charles huffed and crossed his arms. “Well played…you win.”
A few customers waved at Hob, beckoning him over to order. “Ah, bollocks…here we go again.” He smiled sheepishly at the spirits and the Endless. “Only a couple more hours, promise.”
Hob hurried away and Charles was about to follow, when he stopped and turned to Edwin. “Hey, are you doing alright? I know…I know you don’t like small rooms very much.”
Edwin blinked, then glanced at Dream. “I…I’m ok right now. Thank you, Charles.”
“Of course. Anything for my best mate.” He placed a hand in Edwin’s shoulder. “If you aren’t ok…please come get me. We’ll…we’ll go outside or something, alright?”
Dream’s words echoed in Edwin’s mind.
‘The people who love you and care for you…they will be your raft…You do not have to battle those waves alone, Edwin.’
The young spirit smiled and placed his hand over Charles’. “I will come get you, I promise.”
Charles grinned and gave Edwin’s shoulder a squeeze before he bounded after Hob once more.
Dream smiled at Edwin. “I believe you will find yourself able to read now.”
The ghost boy looked down at the velvet covered book. He picked it back up, then took in a deep breath and opened it once more.
He did, indeed, find he was able to read.
•—-•—-•—-•—-•
Twitter/X•AO3•Pillowfort •Linktree•Bluesky•Ko-fi
I struggled a bit with this one.
I will admit, I haven’t watched DBD yet. I will be this weekend tho.
But that doesn’t stop me from falling in love with the characters. I am the type of person who “spoils” movies and shows for themselves. I enjoy learning about the characters and the plot and story before I dive into the show. It helps me connect.
The problem with this…method…is I don’t always know the entire plot of something.
Which was issue here.
(If you do not wanna read spoilers for the show and comic, then do not read past the line)
Because DBD is so new, there not a lot out there yet on the show’s version of things. What I mean is, is that in the DBD comic fandom wiki, it says:
“He (Edwin) was abused by bullies who, one evening in 1914, dragged him up to the attics where they dressed up, drew a circle on the floor, and sacrificed him along with frogs and rabbits in an effort to raise devils that never came.
They hid Edwin's body in a trunk, and it was never found, Edwin thought no one looked particularly hard for him since his killers barely covered their tracks.”
I do not know how accurately the show went with the comic as the only thing I can find is an article about how the boys died, which states:
“Edwin's past in 1916 is quite heartbreaking. He had a crush on Simon at their British boarding school. He was invited to a date, only to be ambushed by Simon and his friends. The bullies thought they would have some fun with an occult ritual meant to summon the demonic Sa'al. It feels like they weren't sure that the tome they had would really bring the demon up. But they just wanted to hear Edwin scream and cry. The drunken hazing quickly turns sour as Sa'al comes up and roasts the bullies to ashes. He apologizes to Edwin, but the rules are the rules. Sa'al drags Edwin to Hell as the sacrificial part of the ceremony must be honored.”
So, as I stated above, I struggled. I truly wanted Edwin’s fear to be of the box his body had been hidden in. The fear of the confined space and the four walls and the darkness, because, perhaps, maybe his spirit had been stuck in the box too before he realized and figured out he could leave it.
But the box wasn’t used in the show.
So, I opted for the room, the attic.
Anyway, I’m rambling about this too seriously. I can headcanon things and situations all day long, but I like when those headcanons and my fics have true to the original story details if I can get them in there.
#dreamling#obsessive_dreamling#dream of the endless#hob gadling#centennial husbands#dream x hob#dream of the endless x hob gadling#hob adopts the dead boy detectives#sandman and dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives#Dream adopts the dead boy detectives#charles rowland#edwin paine#edwin payne#paineland#payneland#I swear I’m gonna watch the show this weekend#and then you’re all gonna be in for my much more accurate detail fics#dream can relate to Edwin being afraid of small spaces#fishbowl#claustrophobic Edwin?#EternalFamily#obsessive_Payneland
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Family Affair ~ Max Verstappen
Summary: it’s a family affair at the singapore grand prix as the entire verstappen family come to cheer max on
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ynusername just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 103,382 others
ynusername: I’ll give you three guesses as to where we’re off to 🏎️
tagged: maxverstappen1
28,492 comments
maxverstappen1: well aren’t I just the luckiest dad/husband in the world 🩷
username1: we love when the verstappens all show up
username2: I can’t deal with how cute you all are
charles_leclerc: yesssssss!! leo can’t wait for all the pup cuddles this weekend
ynusername: nvm the kids, all the cuddles will come from me
danielricciardo: it’s been too long, can’t wait for the fam to reunite
maxverstappen1: @/danielricciardo you do know you’re not actually family…don’t you?
danielricciardo: @/maxverstappen1 can you stop ruining my dreams please and thank you
redbullracing: we’re preparing ourselves for all the chaos 🤯
username3: watch max be exhausted before even getting in the car dealing with the kids and y/n
username4: cannot wait for the verstappen spam all weekend 😍
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maxverstappen1 just posted
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maxverstappen1: project verstappen junior is well underway, checkout y/s/n learning the ropes during practice this morning 🏁
72,291 comments
schecoperez: when I’m next in need of a new engineer I’ll be sure to give y/s/n a call!
ynusername: @/schechoperez he would absolutely love to work for uncle checo ❤️
username4: just when we all thought these kids could not get any cuter, max posts this
username5: it’s the baby uniform for me 😅
oscarpiastri: y/s/n already looks like he does a better job than anyone at mclaren
mclaren: @/oscarpiastri we’ll pretend we didn’t hear that
ynusername: I’m never gonna be able to escape f1 am I??
username6: max must be the proudest parent seeing his son so in love with what he does
pierregasly: little guy is looking good in blue max!!
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redbullracing: when all the verstappens are wearing blue, it only means one thing 🏆🏁
tagged: maxverstappen1 and ynusername
28,491 comments
maxverstappen1: another big push this weekend team, with my favourite mascots I’m sure p1 has my name all over it
username7: petition for team verstappen to come and cheerlead for me instead
username8: asking for a friend…can your ovaries burst just from a photo?
ynusername: team max! (and @/schechoperez 🎉)
username9: if anyone was wondering where all the good genes went…look no further
username10: pls tell me that is max’s helmet that y/d/n is wearing, it’s drowning her 😭
ynusername: @/username10 don’t worry, it is, she insists on trying it on when max finishes it, the stench is gross
maxverstappen1: @/ynusername excuse me, I always smell a million dollars
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maxverstappen1: on pole for tomorrow, job done for another day, now to rest up and relax for tomorrow. not sure how possible that will be with the kids, the pink bow was a new low 🥺🩷
68,302 comments
estebanocon: mate the bow should stay…really brings out the colour in your eyes
georgerussell63: sorry max, I’m never going to be able to take you seriously again
ynusername: damn love, y/d/n really has got you wrapped around her little finger 😂
maxverstappen1: @/ynusername what can I say? she really is a daddy’s girl 😊
username11: look at his smile, that’s a true proud dad smile going on there
username12: I swear max you have never looked better 😍
carlossainz55: almost at smooth operator level there max!!
maxverstappen1: @/carlossainz55 from you sir I will take that as a complete
pierregasly: that reminds me, I really must update your photo contact on my phone
fernandoalo_oficial: you lose all street cred the moment you become a dad I’m afraid max
username13: not all the drivers finally taking revenge and getting back at max 😂😂
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ynusername: the three stages of race week with children. 1) run around with loads of energy. 2) begin to tire but remind yourself how cute your children are when they give you cute notes. 3) completely collapse after the race when you realise your children have tired you out before the lights even went out. sorry bub, but remember we love you dearly 🩷🩷🩷🩷
tagged: maxverstappen1
42,593 comments
maxverstappen1: I’ll be good as new for tomorrow, spending time with you guys will always be my priority. I love you all so much more 🥺❤️
landonorris: I remember the days when max used to write me cute notes like that 😭
danielricciardo: @/landonorris and the days when he used to play tag with me around the paddock too
landonorris: @/danielricciardo he’s abandoned us now for the kids…my heart is broken
yukitsunoda0511: that looks like a man trying to get five minutes peace from his kids on the right 😂
maxverstappen1: @/yukitsunoda0511 guilty as charged
username13: just when I think we possibly couldn’t get anymore cute dad max photos for the weekend, we end up getting more
username14: you just know that max absolutely dotes on his two angels
oscarpiastri: petition for the two of you to adopt me, I want to be part of all this fun too 🥺
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maxverstappen1: singapore p1 🏁🎉 couldn’t have done it without my incredible team cheering me on, having them beside me constantly reminds me of the sacrifices they all make. y/n, y/s/n, y/d/n, you guys are the best. thanks for all the support team, now to soak up all the daddy cuddles before the next one 🔥
tagged: ynusername
194,328 comments
ynusername: words cannot begin to express how proud we are of you!! nights like this simply don’t get better my love 🤩
redbullracing: congratulations on a great week of racing max, enjoy the time with your family now
username15: poor y/d/n looks so exhausted, it must be hard work cheering for daddy
landonorris: are those daddy cuddles just from y/s/n and y/d/n????
maxverstappen1: @/landonorris what exactly are you implying?
landonorris: @/maxverstappen1 🫢🫢🫢🫢
charles_leclerc: congrats on a great week max, an honour to share the podium with you again
lance_stroll: lovely to finally meet all the family my man, enjoy the rest and recovery with your little ones
username16: are we all just going to pretend like we don’t know what lando is hinting at back there?
username17: max screams daddy material…literally 😅
georgerussell63: we couldn’t not let you win this one…we just didn’t wanna upset the kids 😂
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ynusername: husband, father, grand prix winner, is there anything that this man can’t do? we are so proud of you max, every time I think you can’t achieve more, you go and prove me wrong. thank you for the best weekend with our little team ❤️🔥
tagged: maxverstappen1
42,402 comments
carlossainz55: he’s yet to beat me at fifa…that’s something he can’t do 😂
logansargeant: I swear you guys are the ultimate goals, if anyone asks, this is how I want my future to look!!
maxverstappen1: thank you for cheering me on, I hope you guys know that I do all of this for you 🥺
ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 ofc we do, and once again you’ve reminded our children that hard work really does pay off
danielricciardo: I remember the days when he used to hug me like that 😭
ynusername: @/danielricciardo MOVE ON AND LET IT GO 😂😂😂
username18: he’s lucky to have someone as amazing as you in his corner y/n
username19: pls tell me this is the last post this weekend, my heart can’t take anymore adorableness 💔
landonorris: go team verstappen!! (I’m secretly rooting for you guys!)
redbullracing: remember y/n you’re always welcome in the paddock, we’ve loved having you, y/d/n and our future world champion y/s/n with us this weekend 😊
——
I hope you enjoyed this little smau, any feedback or requests would be gratefully received 🥺🥺🥺
#f1#f1 imagine#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula 1 x you#formula 1 social media#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 fanfic#formula one#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#f1 smau#formula 1 smau
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📸 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐌 𝐈𝐓 - MATT STURNⵊOLO
matt sturniolo x fem!reader
Contains: Smut, swearing, A lot of praise, teasing/flirting, pet names (baby, good girl), fingering, Sextape, unprotected sex, Creampie, p in v, overstimulation, spanking, aftercare, fluff. - Semi-proof read! I think that’s all?
Synopsis: you and Matt have been dating for 3 years now and your sex life isn’t vanilla pre say but it isn’t crazy. Matt and his brothers are about to go on tour and unfortunately Matt isn’t allowed to take you this time, So Matt wants something to remember you by.
Word Count: idk?
Author’s notes: a lot of you guys wanted this one so I hope you enjoy it!!
* *:･ﾟ✧💒*:･ﾟ✧
Me and Matt had finally a day to ourselves, Chris and Nick were sleeping over at a friends house and Matt texted me telling to come over. Me and Matt have been dating for around 3 years now and we never get to have any alone time, he’s going on tour tomorrow and I wanna be able to spend time with him before he goes.
We’re in Matt’s bedroom music softly fulls the room as the passionate make out session takes place. Earned it by the weekend softly plays in the background as Matt pulls away from the kiss, ‘you know how I leave tomorrow right..” he plays with the bottom of my shirt. ‘Yea why?’ My hands creasing his chest as i straddled his lap, ‘what if we tried something different tonight?’ He sounds nervous but Matt never wants to try something new so I’m kinda excited.
‘Of course what is it?’ ‘What if we made a sex tape so while I’m gone we can both have it since we won’t be together..” honestly the thought of him fucking me dumb being on tape makes me fucking soaked. ‘Of course baby I’d love to be able to watch how good you fuck Me’ I get off of him sitting on the bed, I watch as Matt gets up and walks over to his computer picking up the camera he and his brothers use to film, he starts recording smiling as he walks to the edge of the bed.
He grabs my legs pulling me to the edge of the bed the camera basically in my face. As he faces the camera towards me he bites his lip, ‘look at my pretty girl..’ I blush and immediately cover my face with my hands. ‘Matt.. stopp’ he chuckles and zooms the camera in my face and zooms back out, ‘uncover your face’ I uncovered my face smiling as he lifts my chin up. ‘There’s my precious baby’ he puts the camera down back on the desk facing it towards the bed, he picks me up swiftly as he lays me down on the bed hovering over me moving my hair out of my face.
‘God you’re so beautiful my love..’ he says pulling down my Jean shorts showing my blue thong, ‘mmh you wore these for me didn’t you’ he smiles rubbing my legs ‘you like em?’ I tease ‘like is an understatement beautiful.. strip for me’ i sit up and pull off my (his) shirt showing my blue lace bra. I take off my bra and underwear leaving my self bare in front of him and the camera. Matt smirks and grabs the camera showing my bare body, ‘fuck look how beautiful..’ he spreads my legs still holding the camera he shows my soaked pussy.
‘Who got you this wet huh? Tell the camera’ he says showing the camera him running his hand over my vagina. ‘You did..’ I say softly, he gives me that irresistible smirk before slowly moving his fingers towards my soaked pussy and start to rub me in a circular motion. I gasp as he slides a finger into me ‘oh fuck Matt just like that’ Matt smirked again as he said ‘hmm you’re already wet for me mama, good girl’, he says as he takes of his shirt and his pants being low reveals his slurry waist even more. As he smiles and he slides his middle and ring finger right into me causing me to moan and gasp.
‘oh baby..’ he smiles at me as he knows he’s making me feel good ‘ am I making you feel good?’ I moan again as I say ‘y-yes’ as he starts to pump his fingers faster and faster pushing me to my climax ‘Holy fuck Matthew’ he smirks ‘are you gonna cum mama?’ he asked his voice turning me on. As he continued to do his amazing finger work I start to moan very loudly and say ‘oh fuck M-matt ughh’ as my legs starts to shake only little as I release. Matt pumps and shakes his hands up and down making me squeal and moan even louder. ‘Fuck..good girl making such a mess for me’ he smiles kissing my stomach softly as I calm down for the intense pleasure.
‘I’m going to fuck you so good, you won't even remember your own name.’ He says pulling down his sweatpants and boxers his cock springing out hitting his lower stomach. ‘Knees now’ he climbed on the bed and I got on my knees in front of him, as I’m looking up at him he shows the camera me on my knees ‘you look so pretty like this.’ I smile as I jerk him just a little bit before taking him into my mouth full throating him my lip almost touching his sack as I continued. He lets out a groan. The warmth of my mouth causes him to flinch as i continue to suck Matt, I put my hands onto his thighs and pull off putting my mouth on his tip swirling my tongue around his tip before I take all of him back into my mouth, ‘fuck princess your so good to me’ Matt says throwing his head back with a little eye roll.
‘god your such a slut’ he says causing me to moan against him, he grabs my hair into a makeshift ponytail pushing my head farther down. ‘Good fucking girl .. take that dick baby’ I moan pushing my head farther down, my eyes water as I felt the tip hit the back of my throat gagging as I tried to take more.
‘fuck yea choke on my cock.. shit’ Matt starts twitching in my mouth indicating he’s getting closer and I can tell by the tone of his voice and then he says ‘oh fuck.. I’m about to cum’ I then take my mouth off start to jerk his cock ‘fucking hell..’ I take it back into my mouth to swallow the load. ‘Oh shit ..’ Matt grins, his cheeks flushed with pleasure as he watches you swallow his cum and then show off your empty mouth. ‘Damn, you're fucking hot... I could watch that all day.’ He pulls me in for a deep kiss, tasting himself on my lips.
‘Lay down princess..’ I got back on the bed laying down adjusting the pillows, ‘you ready my love?’ I nod feeling him slide in me. ‘Oh my goodness fuck..’ his hips thrusting against yours with more urgency. He kisses down your neck and trails his lips lower, sucking and nipping at your sensitive skin. ‘I'm going to fuck you so hard, you'll see stars, baby’ I moan grabbing the sheets.
‘Hader Matt please..’ this encourages Matt as he hits a new spot in you that makes you instantly scream. ‘Fucking shit your so tight babe’ he unexpectedly pulled out flipping me over, my face smashed into the pillow as he slams back into me. ‘Ughh fuck Matt’ I moaned into the pillow, ‘I’m going to fucking breed you baby..’ he pulls my hair making my back arch as he kisses my shoulder playing with my breasts as the thrusts into me. He roughly smacks my ass making me moan softly ‘again..’ he smirked smacking my ass again ‘such a slut’
‘Matt ima cum..’ he ignores my words letting go of my hair as I fall back into the bed, he goes harder as I let out a scream releasing all over him. That doesn’t stop him though he continues thrusting into me at a very fast pace. ‘Matt please I can’t take it’ I screamed out as I came for second time. He felt my walls tighten around him as I came for the second time. He let out a primal growl of satisfaction and continued his brutal thrusts. With one final push, he released himself inside me, filling me up completely as they both cried out in ecstasy.
I was screaming at this point and his back was all ruined due to my nails he pulled out picking up the camera showing my pussy dripping with our cum mixed together. ‘Such a perfect pussy..’ he takes his fingers and shoved it back into me and finally turning off the camera. He collapsed onto the bed next to Me, both of us panting heavily as our orgasms subsided. He turned to look at me, admiring the sight of his beautiful girlfriend ‘ima clean you up okay?’ I was too tired to speak as Matt comes back with a damp rag cleaning us both off climbing back into bed cuddling me softly.
‘I should let you film it more often huh?’ He chuckles ‘oh definitely’ he says as we drift off to sleep…
Author’s notes: I hope this was good if I missed any errors don’t be afraid to let me know I love y’all so much and hope you have a good day
Taglist: @mattyb4dominicans @sturniololvrrr @norr1ssturni0lo @thc-bolter @va1ent1naa @lanas-doll @sturniolohoe @iluvmattsbeard @m9ttsverse
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo x reader#smut smut smut
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Let The Light In |6|
Tara Carpenter x Fem!Reader
Chapter Six: Knight In Shining Armor
Summary: Tension rises between you & Tara when you, once again, find yourself protecting her—old habits showing themselves
Warning(s): Swearing, angst, Fr*nkie, grief (if you squint), intoxication, mentions of social anxiety & underage drinking
Notes: Took a while but it's finally here! Also throwing it out there that my face claim for Charlotte is Sofia Wylie<3
Masterlist|Previous Part|Next Part
Tara was walking down the streets of Manhattan, finally done with her classes for the day. It had been a long week and Tara was just thankful it was finally the weekend. She walked with one earbud in while her other hand subconsciously clenched her keys in her right pocket. It was a habit she had picked up not too long after what happened back in Woodsboro; that plus the pepper spray, taser, whistle, and expandable baton Sam always made her take before leaving the house, meant she was more than ready to defend herself if needed.
As she continued to walk, she felt something fury brush up against her. She looked down to find a gray cat, brushing itself against her. Tara smiled to herself before crouching down to get a better look at the cat. “Hey, there…do you have a name?” She looked for a collar but didn’t find one.
Just then, the sky let out a loud grumble. She looked up at the gray skies then back at the cat, thinking. “I can’t just leave you out here to get drenched. Come on, let me take you home,” she gently picked up the cat, who didn’t protest.
By the time she got home, she was soaked. Her mascara was running and her hair was damp. She was freezing cold; she had wrapped her jacket around the cat so he wouldn’t get wet.
Sam began to walk out from the kitchen as she spoke, “Hey Tar– you’re soaked.”
“Yeah no shit, Sam.”
“Is… Is that a cat?”
“...Yes…” Tara said with a sheepish smile; she had completely forgotten about the ‘needing to convince Sam to keep him’ part.
“Tara, no.”
“Sam, yes.”
Sam sighed as she made a quick trip to the bathroom, coming back with a towel and wrapping it around Tara. “You can barely take care of yourself–”
“Not true!”
“–How do you expect to take care of a whole ass cat?”
Tara rolled her eyes, still holding the cat protectively in her arms. “Come on, I’m not a kid. I can take care of a cat. I’ll buy his food, change his litter box—all that stuff!”
“I don’t know…”
“Please, Sammy,” Tara begged, pouting out her bottom lip. She gave Sam the same look she’d give her whenever she wanted more cookies when they were younger.
“Alright—alright, fine, you win,” Sam huffed and an excited smile broke out on Tara’s face.
“Yes!” Tara looked down at the cat victoriously.
“But Tara, I swear, I better not step in cat shit.”
“No cat shit. Got it.”
—
Dook.
That’s what Tara named her new found cat—named after the Babadook. It had been only a few days since she found him and he’s earned the title of, “my little menace,” from Tara. In the few days Dook has been here he has scratched Chad five times, ripped up Mindy’s sweater in five different spots, and constantly hisses at Sam during the most random times. Why? Sam has no idea, but Tara made the theory it was, “just to mess with her.”
So far, the only person Dook has been even remotely soft to was Tara. She didn’t mind that at all; she enjoyed coming home to Dook’s company—her room feeling less empty than it usually feels.
It was the following Tuesday; she sat not too far from the door as she re-watched Fear Street 1994 while waiting for you. Just as she was about to check her phone for the time, she heard a couple knocks on the door. Before Sam could call out for Tara to answer it, Tara jumped up and made her way to the door. Sam only raised an eyebrow before going back to what she was doing.
Tara counted five seconds in her head before opening the door.
“Took you long enough,” she said with a slight eye roll.
“Afternoon to you too, Carpenter. So, you're gonna let me in or…”
“Well you’re as patient as ever,” Tara remarked sarcastically as she opened the door wider, letting you inside. You placed your bag down, sitting on the couch and taking out your notes as Tara sat a couple cushions over.
“So, I was thinking we could start with Friday’s notes and work our way to today since I couldn’t make Friday—” You suddenly heard Tara let out a dry chuckle, causing you to raise your eyebrows as you looked at her.
“Is there something you’d like to share with the class, Ms. Carpenter?” You quipped, looking up from your papers and at her.
“Oh nothing…just that you’ve been missing a lot of study sessions lately and–”
“I wouldn’t call two a lot–”
“–and I don’t know why I have to suffer through extra work all because you wanna swap spit.”
You let out a dry laugh, looking at the younger Carpenter before realizing she was dead serious.
“Oh—Oh you’re serious? Well, how about those two whole weeks you missed over some petty reason—I don't know what the reasoning was, but I know for a fact it was a hundred percent petty.”
“You know what, screw these notes,” Tara said before grabbing your binder from you.
“Hey—Hey! Wait just a minute there—what are you–?”
“We’re watching a movie,” she informed—not asking—after shutting your binder, putting it somewhere you couldn’t reach unless you stood up and walked to it.
“We're a week and a half behind on study sessions.”
“Not my problem.”
“It’s literally your problem—our problem, actually.”
“Gosh, could you just not stress out for, like, two seconds? You’ll be fine. Now, a little birdy told me you like The Nightmare Before Christmas?” Tara told you, reaching for the remote.
“Yeah… I do.”
“Great. We’ll watch that.”
You didn’t need to know how boring she found the movie; she wasn’t looking at the screen much anyways.
—
Sam sat in her room, reading her book as she enjoyed the silence—wait. It’s silent. Why is it so quiet? It’s never so quiet when you’re over. The most she’s heard in the last thirty minutes were hushed voices, but nothing loud enough she could make out. She suddenly started to think about what could possibly be going on in the other—unsupervised—room. She could no longer concentrate on her book as her protective side took over.
You slightly leaned forward as you watched the screen with all your attention. Tara couldn’t help but wear a small smile when she noticed your intense focus. She pulled out of her gaze when she noticed you make a double take at your foot; just then, she saw a certain furry haired animal brushing up against your leg.
To her surprise, Dook didn’t claw at you. As a matter of fact, he seemed…fond of you?
“Hello, there…” You greeted Dook before gently picking him up. If anybody else had picked him up, they would’ve been clawed at in seconds. Tara furrowed her eyebrows as she watched you interact with her cat; the same cat who’s been an absolute ass to anybody who wasn’t her—well, before now.
You scratched him behind his left ear, causing him to let out a satisfied purr. It was then when you finally said something to Tara. “Since when did you have a cat?”
“Got him pretty recently, actually. He was just roaming the streets of Manhattan and had no collar so that’s how he ended up here.”
“Well, does this adorable face have a name?” You asked, looking at the cat as you complimented him.
Tara failed to fight another smile, showing off her dimples as she answered, “His name’s Dook.”
“Like, Babadook?”
“Yeah…” She watched as you continued to be sweet with Dook; he sat comfortably in your lap, looking a lot less grumpy than he usually is.
Suddenly, Sam abruptly enters the living room, causing Dook to hiss at her before moving back into his original position on your lap.
“Sam, hey. Something wrong?” Tara asked her older sister.
“Uh, I just wanted to check up on you guys; it’s been pretty quiet.”
“Oh, yeah, we decided to watch a movie instead.”
Sam looked at the scene, recognizing the movie—her curiosity increased.
“Nightmare Before Christmas? But I thought you–”
“Have no harsh judgment regarding the movie? Yeah. I know.”
“No, I mean, don’t you find it really bor–”
“Entertaining? Yes, Sam. We know this.” Tara let out a dry cough, hoping Sam would just drop the topic all together.
“Okay…well I’m going to order some pizza. Are you staying over for dinner, Y/N?” Sam inquired, moving on, much to Tara’s relief.
You looked at the time, thinking as you did, before looking at Sam from where you sat. “If it’s no trouble.”
“Of course not. I’ll order it right now,” she said before walking away, pulling out her phone as she did so.
“What was that about?” You asked Tara with a raised eyebrow, referring to what her and Sam were going back and forth about.
Tara opened her mouth, not even sure what she was about to say, when she heard someone knocking. “Oh, I should probably get that,” Tara quickly got up to make her way to the door, relieved at being excused from answering.
“What are you guys doing here?” She immediately asked after opening the door to find Chad, Mindy, Anika and Ethan on the other side of the door.
“Good to see you too, T,” Mindy quipped.
Tara rolled her eyes, “I just mean, I wasn’t expecting you guys today.”
“We made plans last week for movie night.”
“And since it’s my turn to choose, we’re watching 10 Things I Hate About You,” Anika added in a cheery tone.
“Um,” Tara looked over her shoulder to you, before looking back at her friends, “One second.”
“Wait, who were you loo–” Before Chad could finish his question, Tara shut the door, making her way towards you.
“So, uh–”
“Heard the whole thing.”
Tara lightly nodded, holding her wrist in her other hand behind her back as she continued. “Does this mean… you’re going to go?”
You were about to say yes but the words caught in your throat when you finally looked at the expression Tara wore.
You thought for a moment, putting down the bag you were just packing.
“Do you want me to?”
“Well…want’s a strong word–”
“Yes or no, Tara,” you said, looking at her.
Tara mumbled something incoherent, looking away from your gaze.
“You’re gonna have to speak up, mumbles,” you teased the younger Carpenter.
She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. “I wan—I want you to stay. Happy?” She huffed, not even sure why she puts up with you.
You smile smugly at her, “Fine. ‘Guess I’m staying.”
—
It was awkward—at least, for you, it was. Tara and her friends seemed to get each other, which is great for them, but you felt almost like a chaperone the entire time you were there. You tried to distance yourself as much as possible and when you did find yourself surrounded by the group of friends, you stuck by Anika.
You always found yourself gravitating toward a familiar presence whenever you got caught in social situations like this. You spent most of your own fourteenth birthday party—that you didn’t even want—attached to Henry’s side, following him around like a puppy. You often stuck by people who you found comfort in. You’ve known Henry since daycare years and Anika has been there since she’s entered your life.
You look at the time to see only an hour has passed as you sigh to yourself. Why were you here again?
“Hey,” you heard Tara say, opening her bedroom door to find you on her bed.
Oh, that’s why.
“Hey.”
“You’re not enjoying yourself,” she said as a matter of fact, feeling a little defeated for some reason.
“Hm? Oh no—no this is, uh, great. Yeah, I just love hearing about the same football story over and over again while your curly haired friend continues to make passes at me…so fun,” your voice couldn’t be any more sarcastic. It started out as you wanting to lie, telling her it was going alright—truly! But you can’t help but be your usual sarcastic self, especially around Tara.
“You’re having the worst time ever, aren’t you?”
You looked at her apologetic expression, exhaling as you adjusted your posture a bit. Tara walks over to sit across from you.
“Look…Tar, it’s nothing personal. I’m just—I’m just not good with this stuff.”
“What do you mean?” Tara inquired genuinely.
You sighed, pressing down on your thumbnail with your index finger as you spoke. “I’m not good with…unfamiliarity I guess, or whatever. And—and socializing and all that shit just doesn’t come naturally to me—at least not like it does for people like Anika, and Chad—or you.”
Tara continued to listen to your words, giving you her full attention as you opened up to her. You blinked back at Tara, feeling like you just overshared far too much.
“This was stupid. Forget it.” You got up to leave but just as you reached for the door handle, you felt slender fingers wrap themselves around your wrist.
“It’s not stupid,” you heard Tara speak. You turned your head to look at her. “If you ever want to talk about it more… I’m here. That won’t change.”
You swallowed, taking in Tara’s words as you processed what she was saying. You didn’t trust your voice, only settling for a light nod before leaving Tara’s bedroom.
By the time Tara also left—waiting a couple minutes, wanting to give you some time—you had already made your escape.
When you got home that night, the feeling of dread took over you. It felt like there was barbed wire wrapped around your throat as you tried your hardest not to cry, because you knew if you did there was a chance you’d never stop. Memories of him flashed through your mind as you tried to shake them away, but it was no use. No matter how much you tried to escape it, Dewey's voice continued to ring in your head.
Dewey placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, looking at you with genuine eyes as he spoke, “I’m here. That won’t change.”
—
Tara looked around with furrowed eyebrows, looking at the sea of people. She was currently at a Halloween frat party; she chose to go with a pirate costume this year.
Tara was feeling indecisive about her costume this Halloween but then she got the idea when she remembered something you told her; for your first seven Halloweens, your mom had you dressed up as a pirate. Tara could tell you would not be wearing a pirate costume again any time soon.
Because of your high-sea past, Tara thought dressing up as a pirate would be a fun way to mess with you—well, if you were actually here. You were nowhere in sight. Tara squinted her eyes as she tried looking through the crowd—still no sign of you.
Mindy noticed her friend looking around the room from her seat, which was odd. By this time Tara would be drinking, dancing, or even playing beer pong with Chad—but not sitting down.
Before Mindy could ask anything, Tara turned to Anika, asking her something that answered Mindy’s unspoken question.
“Hey, where’s Y/N?” Tara asked, her voice was slightly raised due to the blaring music.
“At home. She couldn't—or rather refused to make it,” Anika answered the younger Carpenter.
“Oh,” Tara let out, turning to look ahead.
Mindy and Anika glanced at each other, already being on the same page. “Why? Missed her?” Mindy inquired, smirking behind her beer bottle right before taking a sip.
Tara lightly scoffed, “Pfft no.” Tara dramatically rolled her eyes, crossing her arms and leaning back in her chair.
“Y/N?” Tara heard Anika say; she immediately sat up, uncrossing her arms and fixing her demeanor. Her expression instantly dropped when she saw who you were with.
She did not know much about Charlotte. She seemed nice though. Nice enough. Tara heard from Anika that you’ve been “hanging out” with Charlotte for a few weeks now but haven’t exactly assigned labels yet. That made sense; you were never one for labels.
She suddenly snapped out of her gaze when she realized you and Charlotte were walking towards them.
“Hey, guys,” you said in an anything but enthusiastic tone.
“Hey, Y/N. Thought you weren’t coming,” Anika pointed out, not unkindly.
“Me too but this one,” you pointed with your thumb to Charlotte, “is quite the debater.”
“I was captain of the debate team back in high school,” Charlotte smirked.
“Of course you were,” there was a slight teasing tone in your voice as you and Charlotte shared a look. Tara didn’t like that. She didn’t like that at all. You teased her. You gave her looks nobody else knew the meaning behind except you two.
Tara cleared her throat, causing you and Charlotte to look away from each other and at her. “So, you're gonna actually act like you’re here as a college student or a chaperone?” Tara joked and a small but soft smile grazed your face.
“The night’s still young, Carpenter,” you replied, the smile she had been missing never faltering.
“Oh! Daisy’s here, I’m going to say hi. Catch you later?” You heard Charlotte speak from beside you.
You looked over at her and lightly nodded, “Okay.” She placed a quick kiss on your cheek, catching you off guard, before going to her friend.
You sat down in the seat between Tara and Anika—who was sitting in Mindy’s lap—and exhaled, already exhausted from being here.
“You’ve got,” Anika said, pointing to your cheek where there was a lipstick stain. You raised your left hand to your right cheek as your roommate shook her head.
“No the other—” You, once again, completely dodged the spot she was pointing at and Tara groaned.
“Dude, you’re helpless,” she said with an eye roll before reaching over and wiping the spot for you. She softly rubbed your left cheek as you looked at her. It didn’t take long for you to notice how close her face was to yours.
“There…” Tara trailed off, suddenly growing shy when she too realized how close her face was to yours.
Mindy and Anika look at each other before getting up. “We’re gonna dance. You kids behave,” Mindy said before walking away with her arm wrapped around Anika.
“Let me guess… you’re a homicidal maniac?” She looked at your casual attire.
You smiled at her, tilting your head back and turning it to look at her, “You know me too well.”
You both shared a short laugh before it went silent again. Suddenly, you two realized this is the first you’ve both spoken to each other since that night at Tara’s place.
“Hey, so, uh, you didn’t say goodbye…” Tara said sheepishly, refusing to meet your gaze as she played with the hem of her costume. She didn’t have to specify what she was talking about, you just knew.
“Oh yeah, I was just tired so I decided to call it a night.”
Tara nodded understandingly as you looked down at her hands that toyed with the fabric of her costume.
“So…was this,” you gestured to her costume, “planned or…? You both laughed again before she answered you.
“Course’ not. I just…happened to have decided on being a pirate a couple days after you told me your ‘first seven years of dread’ story.” Another laugh was shared between you two.
“Well, you look good,” you complimented. Tara couldn’t fight the heat that rushed to her cheeks as the compliment hit her ears. She was about to respond when suddenly you felt your phone vibrate.
You pulled out your phone, reading the text to yourself before putting it back in your pocket.
“It’s Charlotte, she wants me to meet her by the pool.”
“Oh. Yeah, totally.”
“Don’t get into too much trouble while I’m gone, princess.” You smiled at her as you sat up from your seat, Tara’s head tracked your movement.
“Me? I would never.”
—
One thing.
You asked her for one, very simple, thing. And now? Now, Mindy and Anika were calling you back inside because apparently Tara had the luck of being near Frankie of all people tonight.
By the time you made your way inside—as quickly as you possibly could—you could see Chad also trying to stop the situation. You made your way over to the staircase, appearing from behind Chad.
“Let’s stay down here,” you said—not asking.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that,” Frankie said, causing you to let out a humorless chuckle.
“Uh, yeah. Yeah, you did,” you remarked, feeling your hands start to ball up into tight fists. Before you could say anything else, Tara walks down a couple steps and is now standing in front of you as Chad keeps a careful eye on Frankie. “No, Y/N it’s fine. I want to,” you heard her say in a drunken voice. Far too drunk to consent.
Frankie walks down, getting close to your face as he wears a disgusting grin. “Yeah, see Y/N? It’s fine. She wants to.” He turned around, roughly grabbing Tara’s arm. His grip causes Tara to let out a sound of pain, tripping on the stairs.
Without a second thought you pull him by the collar of his shirt, pushing him roughly against the wall; picture frames come crashing down but don’t give them a second look as hear glass shatter.
“Who the fuck do you think you are?!” You pushed your right arm harder against his throat, pinning him against the wall as your free hand tightly gripped his shirt. “Serousily, where the fuck do you get off!”
Chad checked on Tara as you had Frankie pinned to the wall. You wanted to hurt him. You wanted to hurt him so bad. What was stopping you? You could do it. You look down at the shards of glass, itching to grab a piece. Suddenly, you saw that sinister smile. His sinister smile. That’s why you couldn’t.
But when you looked back at Frankie, you quickly forgot about everything that was stopping you. All you had to do was press into his throat a little harder and–
“I got it from here, Y/N.” You turned around to see Sam holding a taser. You immediately got the hint, getting off of Frankie.
“Hi! Sorry to interrupt, I'm just going to tase you really quick,” Sam said before tasing Frankie right in the crotch.
“Fuck!” He dropped to his knees, holding onto his stomach as he groaned in pain.
“You bitch!” He yelled, earning a swift kick between his legs—making the pain worse—from you.
“Watch your mouth,” you said before making your way towards Tara. “You okay?”
“It’s that psycho girl from reddit!” Someone shouted from the crowd that surrounded you.
“Hey, don’t you have something better to do rather than stand around here all day?” Anika shouted at the crowd as Mindy shooed them away.
—
Tara walks ahead of the group as she feels her frustration take over. Sam tries to catch up to her as she calls for her, “Tara, will you stop!” Tara rolls her eyes, refusing to stop as she responds. “I cannot believe you did that, you embarrassed me!”
“I was trying to help you!”
Tara suddenly turns around, “And look what happened!” Her voice raises as it runs hot with anger. “You're out of my life for five years then you can't even leave me alone for five seconds,” Tara shouts with a throw of her arms.
“Because you're not dealing with what happened to us. Have you ever gone to see the counselor at least once?”
You looked at Tara, studying every expression she wore on her face. You wanted her to be okay. You knew it wasn’t that simple, but you still couldn’t help but want it. You hated seeing her like this. You never liked seeing her like this.
You checked up on her when she was at the hospital, relieved she was asleep when you got there. You didn’t want her to think it meant anything. You were just making sure she still had a pulse. Who else would you get into fights with? That’s what you told yourself, 'cause it’s true! You weren't overly concerned or anything. But it was the bare minimum amount of concern to have when you found out somebody you knew was recently used as somebody else's pin cushion.
She’s Tara Carpenter, she’ll bounce back in no time, you told yourself. You can still remember the shock on all her friends' faces when they saw you sitting by her hospital bedside. They entered the room and when you saw them, you immediately stood up.
“Sorry, I just found out about what happened and wanted to check on her.” You put your hands in your pocket, feeling uncomfortable with the eyes on you. You couldn’t tell what was going through their heads. “But she’s breathing, so I’ll get going now.” When you’re about to walk out the door, Chad puts his hand on your shoulder which causes you to stop. Was he about to punch you? “You’re welcome to stay, dude.” Oh.
You were welcome to stay. Did you want to?
You shook your head,“No, it’s okay. You guys should spend your time with her—unbothered.” You said before walking out of the hospital, not waiting for a response.
Maybe you cared little more than you’d ever admit.
You snap out of your thoughts as you hear Tara’s voice again.
“Because I know what mine is—I’m going to get my degree, become a lawyer, and live my life, my life,” Tara’s voice was firm. Certain.
—
Two soft knocks could be heard from the other side of the door. Tara was about to tell whoever it was to go away, but then she realized who those knocks belonged to.
“Come in.”
“Hey,” you greeted, carrying a bottle of ibuprofen and a cup of water.
“Hey,” she replied, head tracking your movement as you put the items down and got closer to where she sat at the edge of her bed.
“Mind if I…” You gestured to the open spot next to her and she patted it. You sat down, knees touching hers as you looked down at your hands that rested in your lap. Tara’s gaze from you only broke when she felt the feeling of embarrassment all over again.
You noticed a change in her demeanor, causing you to finally glance at her. “I don’t think she meant for to…make you feel embarrassed or anything,” you tried to comfort. You were never good at this kind of stuff.
“I know… I just—I just completely embarrassed myself out there. You guys probably think a lot less of me now…”
You lightly nudge her shoulder, getting her to look at you again. “Hey, no, okay? We just wanna make sure you're safe,” your facial expression matched your honest tone as you spoke.
Tara turned her head away, a smirk slowly growing on her face. She turned back to look at you, ignoring how close your faces were. “We?”
You rolled your eyes as Tara kept hers on you, smirk never falling. “Don’t let it get to that big ass ego of yours.”
“Aww, you caree about me,” Tara teased. You felt your cheeks warm up as you grew flustered.
“I care about you the—bare minimum amount,” you said unconvincingly.
Tara shoved you a bit, “Liar.”
You shoved her back, “Most honest person you’ll ever meet.”
Tara shoved you back again. “Liar.”
“Oh, you really wanna play this game?” You inquired, turning your head to her.
Tara still smirked as she responded, “I could do this all night.”
Your faces were, once again, inches apart. Tara’s eye line meets your lips as tension builds in the room. Then suddenly the door opens, causing you and Tara to pull apart.
“Oops, sorry I didn’t mean to cock block you,” Quinn said as you and Tara silently cringed.
“Please...don't say cock," Tara said while slightly grimacing.
Quinn shrugged then looked at you. “Don’t believe we’ve officially met. I’m Quinn,” she held out her hand. You glanced at Tara before accepting the red head’s hand.
“I’m–”
“Y/N? Yeah, I’ve heard lots about you.” You couldn’t tell what that could’ve meant, not noticing the shared look between Quinn and Tara.
“Don’t you have, like, a guy to see or something?” Tara asked, trying to get Quinn out of here as soon as possible.
“Well, Tara’s right, I should get going,” Quinn said, immediately getting the hint. “See you around, Y/N,” she winked at you.
“That was…” You trailed off, not able to meet Tara’s gaze.
“Embarrassing? Oh, extremely.”
—
“Is Tara okay?” Charlotte asked over the phone. You held your phone to your ear as you grabbed a box of leftover pizza from the fridge with one arm.
“She will be…” You thought about the younger Carpenter as you spoke.
“I’m glad.” There was a beat of silence before she spoke again. “I uh… didn’t know you could fight like that.”
“What do you mean?” You placed the box on the table, sitting down.
“You had Frankie pinned. A man with his frame and build was completely defenseless under your hands. It was impressive,” her last words came with a flirty tone.
“Oh, yeah?” You decided to match her tone.
“Yeah… Do you want to come over tomorrow? My roommate's visiting his boyfriend so I’ll be pretty lonely—some company would be nice."
You bit your bottom lip, thinking as you looked at your calendar. “Yeah—yeah, that works. What time should I stop by?”
“Six good?”
You looked at your calendar again.
“Can’t do six…” You said, looking at Tara’s name on your calendar. “How about eight?”
“Sounds good. I’ll see you then, super soldier.”
You let out a light laugh, “Yeah, yeah. See you then.”
—
Tara was on the phone with Mindy, intensely debating over American Psycho, when she heard a couple knocks on the door.
She got up from the couch as she said goodbye to Mindy, hanging up. She opened the door to see you standing there with your bag on your shoulder.
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
Tara realized it had been a full ten seconds since she opened the door. She moved to let you inside, and you sat in your usual spot.
“So, what’s on the agenda today?” Tara inquired as she sat, hugging her knees.
“He didn’t really give us much to work with on Friday so, uh, just whatever we missed last time,” you said, not even looking at her as you looked around your stuff.
“Looking for something?”
“Yeah my pen. It was here five seconds ago–”
“This pen?” Tara said, pulling something from behind your ear. You looked at her and realized she was holding your pen. She hands it to you as you let out a timid chuckle, embarrassed at your lack of attention.
“Are you…alright?” She asked, looking at your features as you spoke.
“It’s just exams and stuff. I’ve kind of been all over the place trying to prepare—but that’s why I’m here. To study. So let’s begin,” you pull out your binder, flipping to the right folder.
Tara hesitantly followed along, keeping an eye on you.
After an hour and a half, you looked at the time and silently cursed as you got up and gathered your things.
“Leaving already?”
“Yeah, I’m meeting Charlotte around eight. So, I gotta get going,” you packed everything, racking your brain for anything else you could be forgetting.
“Oh..okay…”
You turned to look at Tara, “What is it?”
She cleared her throat, slightly shaking her head. “Nothing, have fun—oh, and don’t forget your pen,” she dismissed as she held up said pen to you.
You wear an embarrassed tight lipped smile, slowly taking the pen from her. “Thanks,” you put the pen in your bag before zippering it up.
“Uh, hey,” you heard Tara call out.
You stopped your movement, turning back to Tara. “See you later?”
You lightly nodded, a small smile on your face. “Of course.”
—
Tara found herself blasting Lana Del Rey as she wore a pout. Why was she wearing a pout? She had no idea. It was just there, and for some reason she was in a sour mood. She also knew she despised you. Possibly more than she did before; she was just starting to adjust then you had to go and make things even more confusing for her.
Tara looked at her ceiling as she laid in her bed, petting Dook who rested beside her. She suddenly remembered the beer in the fridge.
Sam was in therapy, Quinn was seeing another one of her hookups—what’s the harm?
Five beer cans later and she was more than buzzed. The urge to call you was getting harder and harder to resist with each can. She knew she shouldn’t, but she just couldn’t stop herself from opening your contact.
“Tara?” You asked, confused as to why she’s calling you so randomly.
“Y/NN,” she slurred into the phone. “Have I ever told you you’re so gorgeous it actually hurts?”
“I—uh, where are you right now?”
“Hommee. Where else?” She said, followed by a hiccup.
“I’m coming over.”
—
You knocked two times; you could hear Tara struggling with the door knob from the other side before finally opening it.
“What are you doing here?” Tara inquired with a raised eyebrow. It seemed she forgot about your call from just ten minutes ago.
“Goodness, you’re drunk.”
“I am not drunk.”
“Oh, yeah? Then tell the time,” you crossed your arms as you looked at her. She turned to the nearby clock, “I am not drunk!” She literally told it.
“Jesus,” you pinched the bridge of your nose. “Come on, let’s get you to bed,” you walked over to her but then unexpectedly felt a shove to your chest.
“I don’t—I don’t need your help.”
You exhaled, knowing all too well about the venomous look she wore. “You don’t mean that, come on.”
“I do! I don’t even want you here,” she slurred as she shoved your chest again.
“Too bad then. Cause’ I’m not leaving you like this.”
Tara had used up all the energy she had left to shove you, so she couldn’t even fight you off as you tried to walk her to her bedroom.
“Fuck you,” she gritted.
“I know.”
“No. You don’t know!” Tara yelled. “I don’t need a knight in shining armor,” she continued as you looked down at her. “I’m not a princess who has to be saved all the time.”
“Come on, I know you’re no–”
“This is what you do,” she pulled her arm away from you, “you just swoop in when everything’s fine and completely ruin shit. You think you’re pleasant to be around? Just when I think I have my life figured out, you have to come in and ruin it,” Tara spoke with pure conviction, no slurring in her voice.
“I—I don’t know what to say.”
She let out a dry laugh before saying, “When do you ever.”
“You’re drunk, Tara… Please just let me get you to bed so you don't say anything else you’ll regret in the morning.”
“I don’t regret anything—and I’ll bring my own ass to bed.”
“Okay,” you softly said. You watched as she walked down the hall and to her bedroom. You waited a few minutes, getting the ibuprofen and water ready, before entering her bedroom carefully. Just as suspected, she was already asleep. You silently place the medicine and water on her nightstand before looking at her resting demeanor.
Oh Tara, what am I gonna do with you?
-----------
A/N: I 100% know you guys aren't expecting the family member reveal I'm gonna do for R at some point (clues are scattered...)
Taglist: @t-wylia @lesbianpepsi @jennasfav @alyciaddict @justafoolinlove @steffido1993 @niqmandu @severelyuniquereview @darklron @ravenousinferno @smut-religiously777 @beautifulmongerbanditsalad @vanatalye @alexkolax @andsoigotabutterfly
#tara carpenter x female reader#tara carpenter x reader#tara carpenter x you#tara carpenter x y/n#tara carpenter x fem!reader#tara x reader#tara carpenter#jenna ortega x reader#jenna ortega#jenna marie ortega#scream fic#let the light in au
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Out of The Woods
pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader
summary: Hawkins is home once again, and you're determined to keep your peace. The past comes calling.
chapter warnings: slow burn, motherhood, swearing, childhood trauma, fluff, sweet sweet memories and friends bonding again. <3
a/n: I don't want to give spoilers, but we may or may not have a run-in with a certain metal head in this chapter! :O (just a taste, a lil treat bc you've all been so good.)
chapter 3: Silver Springs || series masterlist
NOVEMBER 4th, 1983
Friday was the best day of the week.
Sure, weekends are great, but Friday night meant movie night at the Munson’s.
“You better not make her watching nothin’ scary, Edward.” Wayne huffed, grabbing his choice of cap from the wall, as well as big winter coat.
Eddie’s hand flew over his heart. “I would never! Not so close to the holidays!”
You threw a piece of popcorn at his head as the laughter bubbled from your chest. “Holidays? It’s not even Thanksgiving!” Eddie motions for you to keep throwing so he can catch one in his mouth. You oblige, but not without a protest of your own. “I would like—no, I demand a comedy.”
Eddie bowed to you, peering up and showing off the piece of popcorn he’d caught at the last second “What m’lady wants, she shall receive.”
The trailer door blew out of Wayne’s grip as he opened it, “Christ, it’s freezin’! Turn the heat on, boy. Your date is gonna freeze to death.”
Eddie gives you a knowing look. There’s no point, his eyes send the message loud and clear. The two of you have told Wayne dozens of times that you weren’t on dates, you were just best friends hanging out.
He didn’t buy it.
“Why does she get the heat? Pretty sure I got frost bite when I got outta the shower today.”
“Because,” Wayne slid his hands into a pair of work gloves as he walked toward you. “I like her and I want her to keep comin’ around.” He bent down, and kissed the crown of your head.
You protested, “I don’t wanna bug you—“
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Eddie teased. “Ya know you say that a lot?”
“It’s the truth!”
“You could never bug me—ever. Even if you could, who cares? Not like it’s a bad, it’s a good bug you reserve just for me; my bug.”
Your eyes seemed to roll of their own free will, “Eddie.”
He dropped down next to you, putting a hand on your upper thigh as he offered you a twizzler. “Yes, Bug?”
Neither of you had noticed when exactly Wayne slipped out.
You’d compromised that night. Ghostbusters, a little something for the both of you.
About 30 minutes in, Eddie looked at you. He took in how you laughed at something Bill Murray said, how the sound bubbling from your chest made your nose crinkle.
God, he could listen to that sound all day.
When you turned to him, he panicked. Standing quickly, “Uh, shit…here,” he said, not knowing where the hell he was going with the sentence.
Eddie looked around for a moment, what felt like an hour for him was surely only a few seconds. He ended up grabbing Wayne’s old Polaroid camera from the shelf. “C’mon, we gotta take a picture.”
You smiled through your confusion, “Why?”
Eddie shrugged, “Because we never do! And I wanna remember this even when we’re so old we can’t remember our own names.”
“You want to remember a randoms Friday night?”
He nodded. “If it’s a Friday night with you? Always.”
The whirr and click of the camera went off before you knew what was happening. “Eddie, I wasn’t ready! I’m gonna look like a fucking Goblin!”
The timber of his laugh made your heart race. Eddie pulled the film from its slot beneath the lens. “Don’t sell yourself short, Bug. Troll maybe, but never a Goblin.”
You elbowed his ribs at the exact moment he connected with the couch.
“Oof.” He laughed. “C’mon, smile?”
“Fine.”
Eddie put his arm around you, pulling you in close. A second later, the flash blinded you both, leaving you dazed and giggly for the next minute.
You held out your hand, and gestured to where the photo of the two of you was laid out to develop. “Let’s see it then.” You demanded.
Eddie pulled it off the coffee table, looking at it before he handed it to you.
He wasn’t looking at the camera, no. His eyes were on you, and he was smiling harder than he’d thought was possible.
He saw how you were leaned into him, your hand holding his as it draped over your shoulder, the light behind your eyes, the smile he couldn’t get enough of.
Eddie felt it then.
So immediate and sudden it felt like his heart got struck by lightning, and it was then that he realized two things:
That this feeling, whatever it was, couldn’t possibly end well.
And two?
He is so fucked.
It became easier to breathe.
You hadn’t realized just how suffocating life here had become. To be back in Hawkins and still feel like you were hiding and alone. Though now, and in the weeks since you’re run-in with Robin and Steve, it all got a bit brighter and a little less heavy.
Steve was committed to putting the past behind you, a sentiment he all but drilled into your head the first night he visited Maggie and you at the house.
“You did what you thought you needed to do to make it. You’re back now, though. Let us be there for you.”
He also became Maggie’s own personal jungle gym. Whenever they watched a movie or had a snack together, your daughter could be found on top of him in some way. They especially enjoyed watching cartoons on Saturdays; Maggie perched on top of Uncle Cheeseball’s shoulders, because according to her it was the ‘best seat in the house.’
Robin couldn’t be deterred either.
She’s over at least three nights a week now, and Maggie is obsessed—like, seriously obsessed. It’s the sort of bond you watch from afar and admire, the way your friend opened her heart to your daughter. How she’s protected her innocence and encouraged her silliness.
Kids aren’t exactly everyone’s cup of tea. They’re loud and messy and demanding in a totally innocent way. They require you to think before you act and never put yourself first. It’s why any dates you’d been on over the years hadn’t worked out, most people disappeared after they learned of her. Not that you cared, Maggie was number one in your life, and you were damn proud of that.
But now here you are, the life you had been convinced you’d never have was happening before your eyes.
“And ya know what else, Miss M? Your Mom fell right on her butt and slid all the way down the hill!”
Maggie’s laughter echoed off the your living room walls.
“Hey! It was December and Hillcrest is notoriously icy when it snows!” You feigned insult, and tickled Maggie as her laughter multiplied.
“Mom! That’s so silly! How'd you stop sliding?” She questioned.
Robin’s eyebrow quirked up, “Yeah, how did you stop sliding?”
You sighed, embarrassment painting your face. “Steve—Uncle Cheeseball had to catch me.”
The two of them howled with laughter, “Yeah-yeah, laugh it up. I don’t like this, you’re in…cahoots!”
“Excuse me!” Robin objected. “I am a responsible adult!”
Maggie stood with her hands on her hips. “Yeah! Me too!”
You leaned down, kissing her forehead. “Alright, well, it’s bedtime for all adults and former children.”
Maggie whined, but let out a yawn mid-grumble.
“See? Proof.” You booped her nose. “Go on, you have school tomorrow. Teeth, pjs, bed, okay?”
Maggie hugged you, “Okay, Mama. Goodnight, Robby! I’ll see you on Friday for pizzas!”
She ran the few feet to your friend, and squeezed her. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world, kiddo.”
Maggie, by the grace of God, listened. She was so worn out from laughing and dancing and playing with Robin that she crashed as soon as her little head hit the pillow.
“Want me to take the trash out on my way?” Robin asked, hands full of the nonsense she’d brought along with her.
“Is there a 3rd hand in there I don’t know about?” You nodded towards her, “No, Robs. I got it, I just gotta do the dishes first.”
Robin smiled behind you, relishing in the gratitude she felt having you back. “I-I’m so proud of you.” It was a near whisper, and when you turned to your friend, she had tears in her eyes.
“Maggie is…she’s so cool! And you’re obviously an incredible Mom. I’m just, I’m sorry you felt like you had to stay away.”
Your own eyes burned at that. You walked to Robin and pulled her into a hug. “I’m sorry too, I’m sorry I didn’t call, or write…I just didn’t know how to—to be here.”
She nodded into your embrace, adjusting the items she cradled. “Well, you’re here now. Anything you need, say the word and I’ll be here, Steve too.”
You pulled away, “I know.”
Robin grabbed her keys with the few fingers she had free. “I don’t mean to ruin the beautiful moment of love and friendship, but have you thought about...him? About what’ll happen if you see him again? I mean, Hawkins isn’t exactly a big town.” She avoided using his name, and that didn’t go unnoticed.
It’s all I think about.
Fingers toyed with the hair tie around your wrist, “I wouldn’t even know…” your voice faded out. “I’ll cross that bridge if and when I come to it, I’ve been here for a while already, and haven’t even heard anyone mention his name.”
That was true.
Everyone used to talk about Eddie Munson. The troublemaker, the cult leader, the devil-worshipping freak. The boy who was corrupting you, and ruining your future.
These backwoods hicks had no idea just how good he was back then. How kind and gentle and full of courage he was. You couldn’t understand why they hated him, not when you found it so easy to love him.
“I didn’t wanna upset you—“
“You didn’t,” you’re quick to reassure her, “it’s a logical question, and sure, maybe I’m avoiding the subject, but I appreciate you looking out for me all the same.”
Robin shrugged as if it was the most simple thought in the world, “Always.”
She left after an additional 5 minutes of arguing about helping you clean, to which you would not allow.
Cleaning up after a long day, while exhausting, was your only time to yourself. It was the one part of the day Maggie wasn’t asking something of you or looking for something or covered in something sticky.
Why is it always something sticky?
The dishes were done, and the counters were clean. You plopped on the couch, and turned on whatever the tv was playing at this hour and had just begun to fold the laundry, when the stink of the trash left by the door nearly had you retching.
“Nope, not waiting til morning…”
“Steve, Steve…” Eddie laughed.
The boy threw his hands up in frustration. “Eddie, I’m serious!”
Eddie slapped his friends shoulder. “I appreciate the worrying, pal. I’m fine, I had one beer let’s see…” the metal head looked at his watch, “an hour and a half ago. Why the sudden concern about my health and safety, hm?”
Steve blanched at the question, stumbling over his words. “T-There was an accident tonight! Drunk driver hit the pole on Cornwallis. Cops everywhere, ya know?”
Steve knew exactly why the thought of Eddie getting hurt or worse was suddenly a new phobia he developed. He had just hoped he’d hide it better than this.
Eddie sighed, “Great,” and stood, grabbing his keys out of his pocket, “back roads it is, gonna take me 20 minutes to get home now.”
Steve stood too, causing Eddie to glance back. He pinched his friend’s cheek, “Would you feel better if I called you when I got home, Stevie?” Eddie mocked, pouting his lip.
Steve pushed him away, “Shut up, man. Fine, that’s the last time I give a shit about my friends.”
Eddie laughed, “Nah, I appreciate it, Harrington. I’ll see ya on Friday right? Still looking your car over at the shop?”
“Yeah, yeah. See ya Friday.”
Eddie left Steve’s apartment smiling to himself.
What a good dude.
By the time he hit Cornwallis, the detour was worse than expected. It took him down several back roads and side streets Eddie is usually able to avoid all together.
Not to mention Forest Hills trailer park is on the opposite side of town from Harrington’s place. Eddie is usually able to zip down Main Street to save some time, but with Cornwallis a no-go, it was an addition pain in the ass to avoid the one-ways.
“Oh come on.” He griped. The car in front of him was going what seemed like negative miles an hour. He whipped the wheel to the left, evading the current route and instead, opting for an old way he remembered like the back of his hand.
Even in the dark.
It was eerie. To be on this street that he'd driven hundreds of times, knowing it wasn't leading to you.
He could practically see you, the way you’d sit on the curb until he got there, bag packed with your essentials for a few days. Wanting to get the hell out of this place before your Dad came-too.
The street was dim, lit only by the few flickering street lamps. He attempted to drown out the glimpses of the past, turning up the radio, and blasting Crazy Train so loud it made his windows shake.
Six houses away.
It was a subconscious entity; these memories shouting from the void and demanding to be remembered.
Three…
The porch light to your old house was on. “Huh…weird.” Eddie whispered to himself.
His van was barely at your mailbox when he slammed on his brakes, nearly getting choked by the seatbelt. He skidded to a stop, and killed the music.
Either he’s high as a kite, or it was you. Standing right in front of him as you dragged the trash can to the curb.
He’s hoping it’s the former.
You, rightfully so, looked like a deer in fucking headlights. Jumping back when you heard the screech of his tires.
But you know that van—you’d know it simply by the way it sounded coming down your street or by the shape of the headlights shining through the Hawkins fog.
The rusted hinges groaned when the drivers side door opened. Eddie was moving, but he wasn’t sure why. Not when very fiber of his being was screaming at him to stay in the van—to keep driving. Did he listen?
Of course not.
Eddie Munson says your name so softly and with such disbelief, it almost sounded like fear coating his tongue.
You, unlike the boy—man before you, were frozen.
That was the first thing you’d noticed. Eddie still looked like…Eddie, just a manlier—a more rugged version of the boy you’d loved.
He had five o’clock shadow covering his jaw. Cheekbones that were more defined, the hollows more pronounced. His hair was shorter, shorter than you remember it, anyway and he wore boots—work boots. Gone we’re the torn-up Goodwill sneakers he’d saved up weeks to buy.
He was in a black henley and dark wash jeans, though he still had his signature wallet chain and denim jacket.
Your heart slammed in your chest. Your dinner churned in your belly.
You could go. You could turn around and ignore him, walking back into your home and do exactly what he did to you.
But you wouldn’t, you’re better than that—better than him.
“W-Why…what are you doing here?” He half-mumbled.
“Minding my own business.” The strength in your voice surprised you.
Eddie was quiet, very uncharacteristically so, before he shook his head…presumably in an attempt to sort out his thoughts.
“But you’re, you’re here. You’re in Hawkins.” You could practically see the proverbial egg shells he was walking on.
Was he…afraid of you?
Good. You thought. He should be.
You crossed your arms, “Nothing ever did get past you.”
He was stuck. Quicksand was pulling him down, holding his body tightly and dragging him into the Earth’s core. He couldn’t breathe, he was dying.
At least that’s what it felt like.
Eddie cleared his throat. “How, um, how long—“
“A while.” You interject.
How long had you been here? How long were you staying? It didn’t matter, the answer is the same.
“And you’re staying here.” He nodded to the blue house he’s rescued you from hundreds of times.
“I don’t see how that’s your business.” You we’re cold, colder than he’s ever heard you.
Eddie took you in now. You were the same in every way that mattered. Older, sure…but still you, and for that, Eddie couldn’t be more grateful.
You had new smile lines. Were you happy? He hoped to whatever God was listening that you were.
“It’s not, shit. I—I know it’s not. I just didn’t know—“
A noise from inside the house startled you. Your head whipped around, fast as lighting.
Shit. Maggie.
“You okay?” He asked.
No, no, no.
Ignoring him, you turn and start walking back to the house, when Eddie calls your name again, not daring to move from where he’d planted his feet.
You all but spit at him, “Leave, Eddie. There’s nothing left here for you.”
And you meant it.
When you were safely inside, you check Maggie, who was sound asleep.
The noise must have been the door, or the wind, but it scared to half to death.
He didn’t deserve to know her, and maybe that’s selfish, but you aren’t ready to share your daughter yet.
Not with him.
Who knows, maybe you never will be.
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request for max, if possible: you live together and your male best friend stays for like 2 days and max gets real jealous, becuase you have inside jokes and so if you‘re up to it, maybe ending in smut, but you ofc don‘t have to 😚
Got it through
Pairing: Max Verstappen x female reader
Warnings: Language, unprotected sex, fingering, oral sex (female receiving), PDA, probably has lots of mistakes.
a/n: i hope you enjoy this and i’m sorry for how long it took for me to write it. PS: my laptop deleted the proofread version but i wanted to post it still so i will proofread it again tomorrow…
When you first broke the news to Max that an old friend of yours was gonna visit the two of you over the weekend, he was excited as he always was whenever he got to meet any of the people close to you. He went grocery shopping with you and was quite helpful in helping you prepare the guest bedroom for your visitor.
One detail that you had spared him was the fact that the person visiting was your best friend, your guy best friend, so when he offered to pick him up at the airport while you finished up cooking the food you two had started preparing, you bit back a smile and agreed, giving Max a nod and a quick kiss before rushing back to the stove when a burning smell had started originating.
With that, Max disappeared out the door, keys jiggling in his hand as he got going. Meanwhile, the smile on your face was quite prominent as you envisioned Max's reaction when he would come face to face with Marc.
There was two possible outcomes to this: hell would break loose or you would get a good laugh out of it.
A while later, your phone pinged, notifying you of a message that came through. You rushed to it, wiping your hands against the apron tied around your waist before picking up the device and reading the notification.
Max: It's a he?!
You could've told me
And just like that, the most interesting days you've had in a while began.
An hour passed before they arrived home, Max trailing behind Marc with a frown on his face, watching very closely as your friend wrapped his arms around you in a tight hug that, much to your boyfriend's distaste, you returned with just as much affection. Then, as Marc followed you to the kitchen, kindly offering to lend you a hand as you sliced a loaf of bread, Max followed in his footsteps, eyeing him up and down with his fisted hands tucked in his pockets, a funny scowl never leaving his face.
"I think you should shower, mate." He said out of the blue, taking you by utter surprise while tapping Marc's shoulders with a tight-lipped smile, "Don't misunderstand me. I don't think you're dirty or smelly." He gave him a once over, "It's just what we do after being at the airport, kind of a law around our house."
Your brows furrowed as you watched Max come up with a rule on the spot, all while Marc looked immensely taken back, glancing at you from the corner of his eye, looking intimidated by your boyfriend. You could swear you saw a glimpse of fear in his eyes.
Max followed his gaze to you and you could practically see him trying not to roll his eyes.
"Come on. I will show you to the guest room and bathroom." He practically guiding Marc away from the kitchen and you had to bite back a laugh that was begging to push past your lips.
You could hear the commotion of what seemed to be Marc being clueless to how the shower works and Max explaining that to him and it went on for several minutes before you felt Max's hands plant themselves on your hips as he turned your around to face him.
"Marc, huh?" He asked, half seriously. However, despite his apparent question, he didn't give you time to answer. His lips met yours possessively in a messy kiss. It barely took seconds until his tongue was meeting yours halfway, his teeth occasionally pulling and nibbling on your lips as he trailed his hands down to your ass, squeezing it in a surprising manner that made you let out a small moan.
He took the opportunity and used the small moment of uncertainty on your part to push you up onto the counter, his body pushing your legs apart until he was stood between them, his hands kneading the inside of your thighs and holding them apart while he continued claiming your lips aggressively.
A straggled breath got stuck in your throat when his hand cupped your pussy, one finger pushing harder than the rest, applying perfect pressure onto your clothed clit.
"Max..." You gasped, you hand latching onto his hair as you head fell back and his kisses traveled down onto your neck.
"Fucking love hearing you like this, you know?" He breathlessly said.
"I know, but you have to stop. Marc might..." He didn't care for what you were saying. His slipped his hand into your pants and panties and applied teasing pressure onto your pulsating entrance, leaving you to subconsciously grind against his fingers, your body now with a mind of its own, asking him for more.
He responded with just what you needed, his thumb played and rubbed your clit as he pushed to fingers into your warm and wet pussy, your walls immediately clenching around his digits and your body arching towards him.
"Fuck." You whined and moved your hips in accordance to his fingers' thrusts, already chasing a high, a thought in the very back of your mind convincing you that you would get to come before Marc came back.
Max was desperate to prove you wrong and leave you flustered in front of your friend, therefore he kept his movements slow until the sound of the guest bathroom's lock echoed from a distance. He pulled away from you and sucked your wetness off his fingers, as you watched him breathlessly, somewhat pissed.
"Marc, my man!" He welcomed your friend back in the room, "I already can feel it, these two days are gonna be so fun!" Max's fake cheer filled the room, his cheesy smile looking very obviously fake to you as he took a seat on a chair, one leg crossed over the other with pure confidence.
The rest of the day went on fine until dinner came around and the three of you took seats around the dining table.
"So..." Max started as he ate, "How long have you known my girlfriend?" He looked at Marc, directing the question to him.
"We were like... 14 when we met. We've been friends for a while." Marc smiled at you and you smiled back before taking a much needed sip of your drink.
"Ah, 14. Right at the beginning of teenage years and shit, right?"
"Yeah!" Marc excitedly agreed, "We had so many teen adventures together. The first time we got drunk, we were together!"
Max's brow's rose in fake pleasantry as he gave you a weird smile, "You were quite naughty kids, you two!"
"Max, what?" You masked your annoyance with a giggle and started a mental countdown until this dinner was over, but it went on for way longer that it should've as Max dragged out the conversation with a fake cheer you'd never seen him have but when Marc excused himself and retreated to him room, and after cleaning everything quickly, Max practically carried you to your room, pushing you onto the bed and immediately climbing on top of you, kissing you as he slipped his hand into your shirt, yanked down the cups of your bra and pinched a nipple, making you moan into his mouth, your mind still not comprehending the quick pace Max was setting.
Within a few minutes, your clothes were scattered on the floor and he was lodged between your thighs, his tongue working its way between your folds, toying with your clit like he wanted to do that for a while. Your back was almost always arched off the bed, your eyes screwed shut as you turned into a moaning mess, the only sounds leaving your mouth besides that being begs for more.
"Max, please. Please, more." You whined, pulling on his hair as you firmly held you down on the mattress.
"Be specific, baby." He teased, swiping his tongue slowly up and down, teasing your entrance then sucking on your clit again, leaving you breathless.
"Your fingers, please."
"What about them?" He acted clueless.
"Max, i want you to fuck me with your fingers, i want them inside me." You sternly said, having had enough of his shit.
He smirked at your demanding tone, held your legs apart and pushed in two fingers that were quick to disappear into your soaking wet pussy.
A loud moan left your mouth and you immediately got lost in the pleasure he was giving you, the feeling bubbling inside you almost euphoric that the moans just kept coming, some of them riskily high in volume.
Your eyes screwed tight-shut and your head dug back into the mattress as your hands clamped over your mouth to muffle the sounds that you had practically lost control over. Just in time, Max glanced up at you and instantly disliked what you were doing.
"Let me hear you, babe." He sternly instructed.
"Max, Marc could hear." You pushed the words past your heavy breaths and locked eyes with him in warning.
"I swear to fucking God, I'll stop all this and leave you whining and begging." He spoke with determination and you could almost see his anger bubbling, "Take your hands off your mouth."
Just like that, your hands were back clutching onto the sheets as Max's fingers continued being thrusted into your contracting pussy, giving you an orgasm that left you writhing on the bed, breathing heavily as you struggled to regain your composure since your boyfriend's tongue was immediately lapping at your clit after that first release, eager to bring you to another, more powerful one, the only thought on his mind being making this night as uncomfortable as possible for Marc.
He moved his tongue up and down your slit, then teased your entrance with it, pushing it into your pussy a little more every time until your hands dug through his hair and you forced him into a consistent movement. Max also didn't hesitate to put his fingers to use, toying and playing slowly with your clit as if he was doing it for his own enjoyment.
"Fuck, i'm gonna cum again." You whimpered and Max had to resist the urge to smirk immediately. Instead, he guided you through your orgasm, taking ultimate pleasure in the pornographic moans leaving your mouth as your body trashed beneath him.
"That's it, let go." He reassured and he moved a hand up to pinch your erect nipple. The pleasure exploded in the pit of your stomach and your back arched off the bed as you released once again.
Max shifted his gaze toward you with a hidden smirk on his face and judging only by his expression and the glimmer in his eyes, you knew this would be a long night, one that would only go up from here, and as the hours rolled, you figured out you were right.
Several other orgasms later and after various different positions Max had you in, you found yourself exhausted, face down on the bed, your hands desperately gripping onto the pillows in front of you while your moans turned to whimpers as Max pushed into you repeatedly and at a perfect pace, feeling you clench onto his cock every time he hit your sensitive spot with a steady pace until you came again and he released inside you with a loud, straggled moan before he collapsed beside you on the mattress.
"Fuck." You exhaled as you relaxed your body and turned to face your panting boyfriend, the look on your face lazy and worn out. You just laid there in your post orgasm calm, blinking slowly and catching your breath until Max pulled you closer and wrapped his arm around you, giving your forehead a kiss and combing his fingers through your tangled hair.
"What was all that about?" You chuckled and held tighter onto him.
His eyes closed as he let out a small laugh, replacing an actual answer with three simple words, "I love you."
"I love you too, Max." You pushed yourself up and kissed his lips then proceeded to sit up, "I need a shower, i'll be back in a little." You explained to him and left the bed in search of your towels and bath essentials then rushed to the bathroom connected to the bedroom.
Just as you were closing the door, Max's head poked through, a silly smile on his face.
"I'm joining, babe."
The next morning, as you woke up in Max's arm, the fact that your friend was visiting seemed to be completely off your mind but as you fiddled around the room, grabbing something to wear, it washed over you that Marc could've heard at least part of last night's shenanigans. How could he not when the aftermath, even hours later, was shaky legs?
You pulled some comfortable clothes on and jumped back into the bed, shaking Max awake.
"Max, wake up." You patted his bare back in urgency, "Max! C'mon."
"Good morning to you too." He groaned into his pillow, burying himself further under the sheets.
"Max, what if Marc heard us?" You gave in and laid on his back, asking the question right into his ear.
With his eyes still shut, he laughed at that. The fucker laughed and suddenly you understood why he insisted you don't muffle the sounds yesterday.
"Oh my fucking god, you did not!" You swatted his shoulder, "How am i supposed to look him in the eye now?" Just like that, you were back on your feet.
"I don't care. For all i know, i would have gotten it through, that he has no chance with you." He boasted and he turned onto his back, "Plus, i was enjoying your sounds too much for you to hold them back for that guy's comfort. This is our place after all."
Your thoughts started racing and for a minute, deep down, you had to admit that the situation was amusing in some twisted way, even more to you than it was to Max but you let that go for now. It was gonna be embarrassing nonetheless to spend the day with Marc now. Deep down you still had hope you would get away with this, that he didn't hear a single thing. Maybe he was the kind of people that slept with earbuds in or something of that sort.
Clinging onto that hope, you emerged out of the room and made your way to the kitchen, needing a cup of coffee. Thankfully, the kitchen was still empty and quiet, warm with soft sunshine peaking through the window.
As soon as the coffee machine was on, you peaked your head into the hallway, checking for any traces that Marc might've woken up, but his bedroom door was still shut and no sounds were heard from him.
Taking a seat by the kitchen table, you pulled out your phone to keep yourself occupied, scrolling through your social media pages and the various posts on there until Max, now dressed in sweats and a t-shirt, joined you in the kitchen with a stupid grin on his face.
The minutes passed and before you knew it, you heard Marc's door unlock, the sound quickly being followed by the one of his footsteps in the hallway.
"Max, don't make him uncomfortable, okay?" You warned your boyfriend in a rushed whisper and received a smirk from him just as Marc walked in.
"Uhh," he stared weirdly at the difference between your expression and Max's, "hello- Good morning, i mean." Marc scratched the back of his head in discomfort.
"Good morning, mate!" Max cheerily said, leaving his chair and walking toward your friend, "You slept well?" He patted his shoulder in a bit of a too rough greeting.
You flashed him a glare immediately but it went unnoticed.
"Yeah, i slept okay." Marc took a few steps away from Max's towering figure. It really wasn't helping, the fact that Max was quite taller than him.
"Marc, do you still take your coffee black?" You left your mug on the table and got up to serve your guest.
"Black is fine." He replied shortly with a tight lipped smile so you poured him a cup and the three of you sat in the kitchen for a while.
It was safe to say that breakfast was the most uncomfortable of your life. Max's hand was firm on your thigh every time you sat and every time you got up, he found an excuse to then allowed his hands to wander either to your waist or shoulders. He was being touchier than he has ever been and Marc was obviously noticing the clinginess, his body language portraying easily how uncomfortable he felt, especially since Max wasn't sparing him of the quick smirks and challenging eyes he repeatedly shot his way.
Luckily, Marc had a few things to do around the city throughout the day so he left the apartment shortly after breakfast, leaving you and Max alone to lounge around, the laziness only interrupted for an hour when Max decided to work out and you decided yo watch him, what mildly turned you on, leading to a bit of making out on the living room couch, only to be startled by the doorbell just as it started getting heated.
"Fucking hell..." Max groaned into your mouth and sat up, reaching for a cushion to hide his boner as you fixed your shirt and got up to open the door.
Obviously, Marc was stood there, smiling with takeout containers in his hands, his smile turning awkward when he took notice of your messy hair, plump lips and Max's weird sitting position.
"I brought lunch, i guess." He treaded in carefully.
"Thank you, Marc! You really didn't have to." You thanked as you walked behind him, attempting to fix your hair with your hands.
"Oh, it's nothing!" He reassured.
Minutes later, the three of you were gathered around the dining table, eating and chatting, the latter only being done occasionally to break the silence.
"Thanks for the food, mate." Max, the first to finish eating thanked and got up, "I think I'm gonna take a nap. I slept awful last night." He excused himself and left the room.
You quickly took notice of Marc’s blushing face.
Silence reigned until it could be heard that Max was in the room with the door closed. That’s when Marc started talking again.
“Girl, i though you were getting murdered last night! He can’t be that good, right?”
“Shit, i’m so so sorry. We just got a bit carried away. I think he sees you as a competition and wants to prove a point.” You rubbed at your forehead in embarrassment.
“Wait…” Marc dragged the word on, “You didn’t tell him?”
“No! I didn’t know if you wanted me to! You’re not out to many people yet and i didn’t want to cross any boundaries.” You explained yourself and watched Marc burst out laughing.
“Oh my god.” He wheezed, “This is fucking hilarious! And i was out here thinking why the fuck he was almost groping you.” He leaned back in his chair, holding his stomach as he laughed.
“Oh, shut up!” You pouted away a smile, “You want me to tell him? That’s okay with you?”
“Yeah, that’s okay! But this is funny, honestly. Wait until i leave and tell him.”
And just like that you had a deal.
Over the next two days that Marc was staying for, Max got more and more possessive but that was only because your friend was also going out of his way to act extra affectionate towards you, for example ruffling your hair as he passed by you, or putting on your favorite songs while he helped you cook.
Then, Marc would be struggling to contain his laughter when after those acts, Max would pull you onto his lap while watching movies in the evening and kiss you for a bit too long when he left for the bathroom.
The day Marc left, as he was saying his goodbyes and thank yous, he whispered quickly in your ear to let him know how Max reacts and right them and there, you almost lost it and burst out in laughter but you bit your tongue and pushed the urge away, watched the firm handshake Max was giving Marc with a glare and a smirk on his face.
When he shut the door and turned towards you, he was quick to complain again.
“Even his name is fucking similar to mine.” He huffed and started walking back to the living room.
Smiling, you trailed after him slowly.
“Max…” you started, dragging his name on.
“What’s with the tone?” He sat on the couch and gestured for you to join him.
Taking a seat by him, you spoke: “I need to tell you something.”
With an anxious look now on his face, he told you to continue.
“Marc is gay.” You giggled and watched his expression change into disbelief.
“No.” He said in surprise.
“Yes, babe.” You burst out laughing.
“That’s not funny. You should’ve told me.” He pouted.
You moved onto his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Oh, c’mon. It’s kinda funny.”
“No, it’s not.”
“It is.” You kissed his pouting lips, laughing a bit into the kiss.
“It kinda is. And i like it when you’re jealous.” You reassured between pecks.
“You do?” He smiled slightly.
“I do.”
“I can still be jealous, you know?”
You tried arguing that there was no excuse for him to be now but as he carried you to the bedroom, he insisted that he could still act as if he was, a suggestion you agreed on quickly, feeling him start to kiss your neck.
“It’s kinda funny though, right?” You tried again as he pushed the bedroom door open then laid you down on the bed.
“It’s not.” He kissed you deeply, biting on your lip, “and i suggest you stop saying it is so you don’t make our next activities” he smirked, “harder for yourself.”
Laughing, you nodded and relaxed into the kiss, knowing that the past few days were something you’d remember forever and that Max would start to find the humor in their happenings soon enough.
#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen imagines#max verstappen oneshot#max verstappen smut#f1 imagines#f1 x reader#f1 oneshots#f1 x you#f1 smut
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ʟɪᴘꜱᴛɪᴄᴋ ꜱᴛᴀɪɴꜱ
ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: it's almost show time for your band but those minutes seem to be taking forever because of the tension between you and a certain guitarist in the band...
☆ ᴀ/ɴ: in the theme of me being terribly down bad for Hobie I wrote this. band au my beloved,,, and the reader plays bass bc that's the only instrument I'm good at
☆ ᴅᴇᴛᴀɪʟꜱ: SFW // Hobie Brown x male!reader // w.c: 1.6k // warnings: smoking, lots of shameless flirting, not proofread as per usual
“Hobie?” You call over your shoulder, swearing under your breath after your eyeliner pencil broke for what felt like the third time that weekend. That’s what you get for buying the cheapest option at the store.
There’s shuffling outside the dressing room, the door swinging open and Hobie leans against the door frame, eyes narrowed and staring closely at you and arms folded in front of his chest. “You called?”
“Got another eyeliner pencil? Mine keeps breaking.” You huff, knowing full well Hobie wore enough eyeliner on stage to rival a raccoon. He nods and disappears for a moment, returning with a small tube in hand. You breathe a sigh of relief, standing to go grab it from him but he quickly moves his arm out of reach, leaning in close enough that your faces are inches apart.
“Gonna say thank you or anything, luv?” He teases, a smirk playing on his lips painted black with lipstick. He’s so… close. Weirdly so, as if he’s trying to get some sort of reaction out of you. And he does, you can feel a strange warmth coursing through you that makes your knees feel weak.
But you step closer, ignoring the way your stomach twists quickly grabbing it from Hobie’s hand. “Yeah, thanks for recommending me such a shit eyeliner.” You mumble and roll your eyes, slumping back in front of the mirror to finish getting ready.
“Mm, if I recall correctly I told you not to buy it. Someone didn’t want to listen, huh?” Hobie drawls, his hands resting on the back of your chair and watching you through the mirror as you apply the eyeliner, a lazy smile playing on his lips. There’s something about him tonight that you can’t place, the small room feeling stuffier than usual. “Thank god I had an extra, gotta make sure the pretty boy stays pretty.” He hums.
“As if I’m not pretty all the time?” You respond jokingly, trying to keep a steady hand as the pencil runs along your waterline, leaving behind a trail of black.
Hobie leans in closer, the chair groaning with his weight as his eyes meet yours in the mirror, they looked darker but it could’ve been the low light of the room. “Oh luv, you’re so much more than just pretty.” He says lowly, his breath tickling the shell of your ear and making your breath hitch. There was something bordering on dangerous about Hobie’s tone.
You click the cap back on the eyeliner, placing it on the table and not caring to even hand it to Hobie before rising to your feet and grabbing your jacket. “Are you drunk or something?” You ask as you shrug the jacket on, moving quickly to escape the heavy tension shrouding you both in the room.
Hobie holds his hands up in a defensive motion, grinning wildly at you. “Haven’t even touched a drop.” He chuckles without missing a beat. “What makes you think that?”
“Gonna be a big show tonight. We all deal with our anxieties differently.” You mumble, not exactly lying. Hobie shrugs and waves your implication off, stealing your seat to fix his own makeup as you leave the room to go find your bass.
You lug it off of the couch, throwing the strap over your shoulder as your other hand reaches for the cold metal of the pegs. It’s not as painfully out of tune as usual, the sound smooth and full as you pluck the strings, trying to focus on getting the right pitch and not how your brain is swirling with thoughts about Hobie. The way his voice sounds reverberates in your head more than the deep hum of the strings, the sounds mixing together in a strange stomach churning symphony.
It wasn’t exactly new, Hobie tended to be a flirty person and was completely shameless about it. It was almost like it was second nature for suggestive comments to spill from his lips, drinking up the sight of blushing faces and embarrassment like some sort of amorous vampire. You’d almost written it off as some sort of strange hazing when you first joined the band before you learned Hobie was just like that.
Well, he was like that with you specifically, his hand staying the few extra seconds on the small of your back whenever he passed behind you in the dressing room. Or those compliments on how good everyone looked seemingly being directed at you more than anyone else. And how he looked at you on stage, god he looked at you like you were some kind of meal.
Yeah, something was up with Hobie.
You cussed when your sweaty hand slips on the fretboard, messing up the bassline you’d been absentmindedly practicing for the past few minutes. You were nervous, struggling to get your hand back in place to play again, shaking too hard to press the strings down so they don’t rattle against the body.
You clamber to your feet, shoving your hands in your pocket and fishing out the last cigarette you’d managed to save this long. The outside air is cool and you can hear the far away chatter of fans queuing up outside the venue. Leaning against the cold brick of the alley wall, you light your cigarette and breathe out a cloud of smoke into the cold air.
“You got another I could bum off ya?” Hobie’s voice breaks your peace as he approaches, that same smirk on his face.
“This was my last one.”
“I haven’t got anythin’ against sharing.” He chuckles and plucks it from your fingers without asking, slotting the cigarette between lipstick smeared lips and breathing in deeply. His lipstick stains the paper and he breathes the smoke out into your face, making your eyes water. “Y’know staring’s rude.”
“So is taking my cig.” You grunt and take it from his fingers, momentarily brushing against his hand. He’s warm and it makes you suck in a shocked breath, immediately averting your gaze from him. Ignoring the black lipstick stains you slip the cigarette back between your lips.
“And so is not sharing.” Hobie retorts, relaxing against the wall next to you, all his jewelry and pins jingling like a wind chime. He’s watching you and you know it, you can feel his heavy gaze on you and it’s nearly suffocating, watching from your peripheral as his eyes rove over your body. “What’s with the new look, tryin’ to catch someone’s eye?”
“Just felt like changing it up.” You mumble, ignoring the way your face gets hotter. Hobie’s heavy boots drag along the concrete as he steps in front of you, practically boxing you in. You stay cool, breathing smoke back in his face and he rolls his eyes.
“Well I like it, think you look stunnin’ dear.” Hobie drawls, his hand cupping your cheek. His hand is rough against your skin, the calluses from playing guitar are noticeable but something about it feels… good. Familiar in a way. His thumb strokes your cheekbone and your breath stutters, the cigarette falling from your lips to the ground but neither of you pay it any mind. “Mm, I like the eyeliner on you. Fits ya just right.”
“I like the lipstick.” You blurt out suddenly and Hobie chuckles, looming closer to your face. You can feel his breath on your cheek and it tickles but you don’t move, still firmly pressed against the wall.
“Thought you would, too bad it gets messy too easily.”
“Messy, how?”
“Hm? You really don’t know luv?” He says breathlessly. You both are holding your breath, inches away from each other, waiting to see who will move first. Who will break the tension building in the air. His hand is on your hip and you don’t recall when it got there, his touch burning through your clothes and making your skin warm. “You want me to show you how?”
You’re nodding before you even know you are, before you’re even aware of the feeling of Hobie’s lips on yours. It’s quick, barely taking a second before his weight is crushing you against the wall and his lips are pressed firmly against yours. It’s intoxicating, just the simple feeling is enough to make you light headed as he kneads your lips together, his lip ring cold on your skin but making your skin flare up with warmth.
His tongue traces the seam of your mouth, tasting nicotine and the small ball of his tongue piercing feels strange against your own tongue. You let him slip into your mouth, melding together as you move in tandem against each other, kissing shamelessly in the dimly lit alley way. Hobie is good, knowing just what to do to leave you breathless and you follow, turning into a strange tug of war for pleasure.
But before anything else can come from it, before his hand can move and lower on his lip and your head can turn any more cloudy, he pulls away. You both stand there huffing for a moment, bodies tingling and eyes dark with lust. Hobie’s lipstick is smeared on his face, black lines swiping down his chin and on his cheek.
“That’s how.” He hums without skipping a beat, pulling away and fixing his shirt. He steps on the cigarette, stubbing it out before turning on his heel. “Don’t forget that we go on in ten.” He says over his shoulder as he waltzes back towards the door, acting like nothing had happened.
“And wipe the lipstick off your face before everyone starts starin’.” He adds before the door closes behind him, leaving you alone in the alley.
#atsv x reader#across the spiderverse#atsv#hobie brown#male reader#hobie brown x reader#hobie brown x male reader#hobie brown x you#hobie brown x y/n#hobie brown imagine#spiderpunk
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Emmy! I’m glad you’re feeling a little better. 🤍
What if I suggested Eddie and Christmas tree? 🥹
thank you Luna! 🧡 we’re running on a manageable 73% today!
“That’s— that’s not gonna fit in the van.”
Eddie was squinting at your choice, a healthy and full looking pine tree that stood at least three feet above you. You were clinging to the trunk, the majority of your arm swallowed by the green needles and you were staring at the boy with a crestfallen expression.
“But he’s perfect,” you intoned. Your boots were muddy and soaked through, your hands cold and cheeks nipping with the December chill. “Look at him.”
Eddie grunted, tearing his eyes away from you as he gazed at the tree with a wry expression. It was huge, at least eight feet and he tried not to rub at his temples. “I am, sweetheart, and as— handsome as it is—“
“He,” you replied, frowning. You stroked a hand fondly over a bushy branch. “It’s a he. He gives strong Michael vibes.”
Eddie blinked.
“Right.” The boy cleared his throat and slopped through a muddy puddle to get to you. The snow had came and gone over the weekend, leaving behind slush and a cold bite to the air that hurt Eddie’s ears. “Well, Michael’s gonna have to hitch a ride home with someone else, because he can’t spend Christmas with us. He’s too big.”
You gasped, an offended sound cracking through the patch of forest that was claimed by all the evergreens and around you, other families turned to stare, middle aged mothers eyeing Eddie with suspicious glares. He resisted the urge to flip them off in reply, even in the mustard yellow gloves you’d knitted him last year. Instead, he grinned - a grit of bared teeth more than anything - and he waved.
“Christ woman, people are going to think I’ve stolen your puppy if you keep lookin’ like that, sweetheart — hi, Mrs Kidston, how’s the kids?”
When the woman didn’t reply, Eddie rolled his eyes and turned back to you and your pout. You were still clinging to the tree.
“Please?” You whispered and the bobble hat you wore slipped down your forehead a little, too big and stolen from Eddie’s bottom drawer. You pushed your bottom lip out for extra effect, peering up at the boy. “Pretty please?”
Eddie groaned, swearing under his breath before he threw his head back dramatically, curls bouncing. He made a show of lifting it back up again, staring down at you with an expression that softened way too quickly. He leaned in, pecking at your lips and when you grinned against his mouth, he stole another kiss from the corner of yours.
“Fine.”
That’s how Michael the Christmas tree ended up strapped to the top of Eddie’s van with old auxiliary cables and guitar straps, bouncing on top of the roof as he swerved back into the trailer park.
Wayne watched from the window with a coffee mug in his hand, shaking his head and smothering his laughter in his caffeine as you clapped your hands from the porch. Michael took Eddie out three times before the boy managed to wrangle the tree into the living room, pine needles in his hair but a very happy girl at his side.
#eddie Munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fluff#Eddie Munson fanfiction#Eddie Munson fic#Eddie Munson oneshot#Eddie Munson blurb#Eddie baby blurb
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New in Town - Ch. 7: First Double Date
You and Joel go out with Tommy and Maria. A continuation of New in Town chapters 1-6 found on Tumblr here.
Pairing: Best Friend's Dad!Joel Miller x Female Reader
CW: Smut. No use of Y/N. Age gap (reader is 35 Joel is 47, not a focus of the fic). Minors DNI, 18+ only
Length: 5.5k
AO3 | First Chapter | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
“I swear to God Joel, if you make fun of me…”
“I’m not gonna make fun of you, Beautiful.”
“Oh you say that now.”
“I’m really not,” he laughed a little.
“I did like… research and shit,” you said from the other side of your bathroom door. “I Googled, OK?”
“I’m sure you look incredible,” you could hear the smile in his voice. “Just come out here.”
You sighed.
“Fine.”
You knew you shouldn’t be nervous with Joel and, usually, you weren’t. But this felt a little different. You opened the bathroom door and came into your bedroom, doing a little spin as you did to show him both sides of the outfit. His face shifted from a smile to something almost hungry as he looked you up and down from his spot on the edge of your bed. He checked his watch.
“What?” You frowned.
“Just seein’ how much time we have until Tommy and Maria get here,” he said, looking back at you. “Think if we’re quick and leave that little skirt on…”
You laughed and all but jumped on his lap, kissing him.
You were going on your first double date with Joel, with his brother and sister-in-law of all people. You’d met Tommy and Maria at Sarah’s cookout a few weeks earlier but hadn’t seen them since. You had, however, heard plenty about them since then. Especially after Joel told you that his brother knew about the two of you.
Your eyes had gone wide when he’d told you that.
“Are you sure it was a good idea to tell him quite yet?” You asked. “We haven’t told Sarah and they’re pretty close…”
“Yeah, I didn’t… uh…” Joel awkwardly cupped the back of his neck. “Didn’t exactly… tell him.”
You frowned.
“What do you…”
“Maria… might have heard us in the bathroom at the cookout.”
“What!” You yelped, eyes wide. “Oh my GOD, Joel!”
“It’s fine…”
You groaned and collapsed all the way down onto his couch, burying your face in the arm of it.
“They must think I’m some kind of ridiculous slut!” Your voice was muffled by the cushion. “This is mortifying…”
“It’s really not that bad,” he rubbed your thigh soothingly. “Really. They like you! A lot! And they kept sayin’ they’d never seen me this happy. Honestly, Tommy was just happy to see me with someone I wanted to fuck in a bathroom.”
“Jesus Christ,” you groaned. “Well, it’s been great, Joel, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to change my name and move to Antarctica…”
He laughed and tugged you over until your head was on his shoulder instead of the couch.
“Sounds cold,” he said, kissing the crown of your head. “I’ll have to find a coat.”
If you’d been falling for Joel before, you’d fully fallen for him over the past two weeks, ever since he’d found out everything about your childhood and your dad.
You’d almost expected him to look for an out once it all settled in. That, when all the baggage had been sitting there for long enough for him to take inventory of it all, he’d run.
But he hadn’t. He’d done the opposite. He spent that weekend holed up with you. Making you dinner, holding you close while watching Sharknado, changing the locks on your front door and installing a doorbell camera so you could see if he stopped by. He dropped you off at work Monday morning and picked you up that afternoon, heading straight to a car dealership after handing you a small pile of print outs. You frowned, looking at them.
“What…”
“So I took what I was asking you about cars over the weekend and found some good options for you,” he said. “Four of ‘em are at one dealership so I figured we could start there unless these are really not what you’re lookin’ for…”
You flipped through the pages, all cars that were makes and models you were already thinking about wanting to look at, just tracked down at places around you instead of an abstract thought in your head.
You teared up, a hand covering your mouth.
Joel frowned.
“We don’t have to do this today,” he said. “I don’t mind drivin’ you for a bit, happy to do it if you need a little more time or just aren’t up for it or…”
“No one’s ever done something like this for me,” you dabbed at the corners of your eyes, trying to keep the tears from actually falling and ruining your mascara.
“Told you I’ve got you, Beautiful,” Joel said. “Meant it.”
You ended up buying a car Tuesday, Joel not a fan of how the salesman you talked to at the first dealership seemed incapable of talking directly to you and instead looked at Joel when answering all your questions.
“That’s just how it is,” you shrugged as you headed back to his truck.
“Don’t matter,” Joel said, opening your door for you. “It’s bullshit. We can always come back if we come up empty but you shouldn’t give your money to that jackass.”
The second dealership had a saleswoman who would actually talk to you and not your boyfriend - boyfriend? - and ended up getting you a car with even nicer features than the one your dad had totaled for about the same price. You dropped Joel’s truck at your place and you drove the two of you to a restaurant you’d found on a local food blog, running your hand over the dashboard when at red lights.
“Happy with the car?” Joel asked, smiling almost proudly. It was one of the cars he’d found and printed the information on.
“It’s perfect,” you beamed at him. “Thank you so much for just… everything the past few days. This is the best I’ve ever felt after a visit from my dad.”
You were feeling pretty good on Wednesday when you got a Nest alert on your phone. Your dad was standing at your front door, trying the key he still had. You took a screenshot and texted Joel.
“Guess who,” you wrote. “Glad you changed the locks.”
He replied almost immediately.
“I’m staying over,” he said. “Got his parole officer’s number?”
When your dad came by that night and actually rang the bell, you stayed just out of sight, watching the reflection of what happened in a mirror on your entry way wall as Joel answered the door.
“Oh,” he said when he saw Joel. “I’m sorry, I must have misremembered the apartment…”
“You didn’t,” Joel said, his voice cold. “Know exactly who you are. You’re not welcome here. Come by again and I’m calling the cops and you’d better hope they get their hands on you before I do. She’s blocked your number.” He handed your dad a business card. “If it’s an emergency, you can call me but you’re stayin’ the fuck away from her. You had your chance, you blew it. Now go, before I make you go.”
“I don’t know who the hell you think you are or what my daughter’s told you…”
“I’m her boyfriend,” he snapped. “And she’s told me plenty. Was probably nicer than you deserved about it, too, knowing her. Last chance to leave on your own.”
Your dad was silent for a moment.
“Take care of her?” He said quietly.
“I will,” Joel said, tone softer. “Do a better job of it than you did.”
“Good,” he said. “Tell her bye for me.”
Joel closed the door and the second you could reach him you threw your arms around his neck, pressing your whole body against him. You kissed him, hard and frantic, tugging him back toward your bedroom as you did. You all but ripped his clothes off of him as you stripped down yourself, racing to get him inside you, not really able to calm down until he was.
“Fuck, Beautiful,” he groaned, his hands on your thighs as you straddled his hips, his cock deep inside. “What’s this for?”
“Needed you,” you said, dropping your forehead to his as you panted for breath.
You were sure you loved him then. You weren’t sure how to say it yet but you were sure you felt it.
Which is part of why you were really trying for this double date. You were in love with Joel, you wanted to impress his brother and sister-in-law. The two of you hadn’t really talked about it but, ever since he called himself your boyfriend to your father, that’s what he was. And you liked it that way. You wanted him to want to bring you places.
Including University of Texas football games.
Even though you knew fuck all about college football. You’d basically spent your entire college career studying or working, going to sporting events hadn’t been too high on your to do list.
So you’d done some research, looked up what people wore to things like college football games. You decided to go all out and settled on a denim mini-skirt, a v-neck University of Texas shirt, cowboy boots and little orange longhorn temporary tattoos on your cheeks.
“Wonderin’ if we should just cancel on them,” Joel kissed down your neck to your cleavage. “Look too good, don’t want to share you.”
“Yeah, we’re not canceling on your brother so you can get me naked,” you laughed a little. “But you can get me naked later.”
“Good luck stoppin’ me,” he nipped at your chin.
Your doorbell rang and Joel groaned, dropping his head to your chest.
“Tommy has always had terrible timing,” he sighed.
You laughed and got off his lap.
“C’mon you horn dog,” you teased. “Let’s go watch the sportsball.”
“One thing first,” he reached under your bed and pulled out a straw cowboy hat. “Thought you might need one of these to complete the look.”
You squealed and grabbed the hat, popping it on your head.
“How long has this been under my bed?” You gaped at him.
He smiled a little.
“Snuck it in the other day,” he said. “You’re a Texan now so you gotta have at least one.”
“I love it!” You looked in the mirror and adjusted it a little. “Thank you!”
You tipped it at him.
“How’s it look?”
He smiled.
“Beautiful. Just… Beautiful.”
Tommy’s truck was loaded down with coolers and a grill, your eyes going a little wide at it all.
“How many people are going to be there?” You asked Joel as you got in the back seat of the truck.
“It’s a tailgate,” he shrugged. “Can never tell.”
“Give Tommy an excuse to drink while grilling for a crowd and he’ll take it,” Maria smiled, twisting around in the front seat to actually face you. “Good to see you again!”
“You too!” You smiled, trying to resist the urge to jump out of the car when you thought about the fact that she heard you going down on Joel.
“I’m excited to have another woman around for this whole thing,” she smiled as Tommy started the truck. “They do this once a year and I swear it’s like they pack a whole season’s worth of football stuff into one day.”
“I keep tellin’ ya, get me season tickets and we’ll spread it out,” Tommy teased.
“You think I want to do this every weekend?” Maria asked, incredulous.
Tommy scoffed.
“Who wouldn’t?”
Maria gave you a look as if to say “See what I deal with?” And you smiled as Joel took your hand, lacing his fingers with yours.
You helped get the tailgate set up before settling into a folding camp chair with a beer next to Maria, the two of you watching as Joel and Tommy put meat on the grill, serious looks on their faces as they worked.
“So,” Maria smiled, taking a sip of beer. “You and Joel, huh?”
“Me and Joel,” you nodded, smiling a little back. “Not too insane, is it?”
“I mean, the circumstances might be a little odd but otherwise,” she shrugged. “He likes you.”
“I sure hope so,” you laughed, taking a drink of beer yourself and looking out at the crowd that was gathering to tailgate. The truck across from you was setting up a game of cornhole. Someone a few trucks down had started playing country music at top volume. “I’m a little fucked if he doesn’t at this point.”
She laughed, too.
“Look, I’ll be honest,” she said. “I know Joel better than most sisters-in-law probably care to know their brother-in-law. Him and Tommy… You marry one and you get the other, too. Package deal and all that.”
You nodded slowly, watching the two of them work while talking conspiratorially themselves.
“I’ve never, not once, seen him show this kind of interest in anyone,” she continued. “Honestly, Tommy and I figured he’d be single forever. Maybe a date here and there but… It never really seemed like a priority for him. He’s never even mentioned a woman before let alone brought her around.
“You seem to make him happy. Really happy. And I want to support him. But… I need to know that you’re in this for the long haul. That man doesn’t get attached lightly but he’s attached to you. Hell, he had me trying to interpret your texts a few weeks back, trying to make sure he didn’t fuck up…”
You winced.
“I was dealing with some family stuff,” you said. “I should have just talked to him about it from the get go and…”
“Hey, I get it,” she cut you off. “Not like you’d been seeing each other long, I wouldn’t have told some guy I’d just met anything all that personal, either. I just want to make sure you care, that you know he’s not just screwing around with you. Not that he’s said that but I know the guy. Tommy knows the guy. This is a first and I’d rather not watch his heart get stomped on.”
You looked at Joel. He was laughing at something Tommy said, his smile wide and beautiful. You couldn’t help but smile, too. Just looking at the guy made you happy.
“I’m in it,” you said, still watching him. “Trust me, I’m very in it.”
“Good,” Maria said. You thought you could hear the smile on her voice. “Because I really do need another girl around these two, they’re insufferable.”
Once the grill was going, Joel put his arms around your shoulders and led you around the tailgate. Tommy’s set up, you soon realized, was relatively modest. A few people had come with campers and had big TVs set up outside, chairs on rugs out front watching other games from around the country. The two of you stopped and played ladder ball with someone who worked with Joel, him smiling proudly as he introduced you as “his girlfriend,” making your heart soar. You even ran into one of your copywriters as he chugged a beer shirtless with an orange X painted on his chest.
“Oh shit, hey Boss!” He laughed. “Good to see you! Who’s your friend?”
“This is my boyfriend, Joel,” you smiled. It was the first time you’d gotten to say that. Joel beamed and the two shook hands. “Joel, this is Steve, one of the copywriters at work.”
“Want a beer?” Steve asked. “I’ll give you two if you promise to forget you saw me like this.”
You laughed back.
“Don’t worry, Steve,” you said. “I’ll be doing my best to forget that, anyway.”
“So not all these people are going to the game?” You asked as you walked slowly back toward Tommy’s truck. Joel’s arm was draped over your shoulders again.
“Nope,” Joel said. “People just come out to party. There’ll be a lot of people around the TVs later.”
“Football is weird,” you scrunched your nose and Joel laughed. “But I’ll still watch it with you.”
“Oh really?” He teased.
“Yup,” you smiled up at him. “But only because you’re hot.”
He laughed.
“Better get in the game time while I can, then.”
When you made it back to the truck, food was ready (“Still got a lot to learn about grilling a great burger, Tommy,” Joel teased his brother, who just rolled his eyes) and you and Joel lost at cornhole to Tommy and Maria.
“Do people really play stuff like that all the time?” You gaped at Tommy after he sent another bag directly into the hole on the opposite board. Yours were scattered on the ground around it.
“We’ve got a set in our backyard,” Tommy said after he punched the air in victory. “You and Joel will just have to practice, don’t know if he can handle me kicking his ass.”
By the time the game started, you’d almost forgotten that you’d come there to watch a football game, having so much fun in the parking lot outside that it seemed like the main attraction.
You tried to mimic how other people reacted to the events on the field, not really understanding any of it but having fun watching Joel have fun. It was about half way through the first quarter when Joel leaned down to whisper in your ear.
“You don’t understand any of this, do you?” He asked.
You winced. You’d tried to watch some informational videos on YouTube and read some basic explainers of the game over the past week but it was like it was in a different language, you hadn’t been able to absorb any of it.
“Never had anyone to explain it to me as a kid and never hung out with anyone who was into it as an adult,” you replied. “So no, not a damn thing. But it’s still fun!”
“Here,” he put his hand on your waist and pointed toward the lineup of men on the field. “We’re on offense right now, that means we’re trying to score and we’ve got the ball. It’s second and eight…”
Joel kindly, patiently, walked you through the basics, going back over things when he could tell you were confused or had forgotten something when it happened on the field.
“It’s really OK,” you said after a few minutes. “I don’t want you to spend all the time you’re supposed to be having fun talking to me…”
“Talking to you is fun,” he replied. “I’d rather talk to you all the time than watch any game. And I want you to have fun, too. Which I know you won’t if you don’t understand what’s going on because you feel better when you know things.”
You looked up at him, at his warm smile and soft eyes and the one curl that had broken away from the rest to start curving over his forehead, and you couldn’t help it. For a moment, the feeling overwhelmed you and it just spilled out of you before you could stop it.
“I love you,” you said before you realized you said it.
Then your eyes went wide and your face fell and you scrambled to take it back. It was too soon to be saying this to him, you’d only known the man a few weeks and things were still insanely complicated, you’d barely figured out that you were in a full blown relationship let alone ready to bring something like love into the mix. It didn’t matter that you felt it and that you wanted to say it, it wasn’t the right time yet.
“Shit. Ignore that, please ignore that, pretend I didn’t say anything, I don’t want…”
“I love you, too,” he cut you off, smiling so big his whole face lit up with it.
You just blinked at him for a moment.
“Really?”
“Yeah,” he laughed. “Yeah, I do. I really, really do.”
He tipped your hat up and kissed you, his arm sliding around you to pull you flush against his front. You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding tight to him, never wanting to stop feeling just like this.
“Look!” Maria patted your shoulder urgently. “You’re on the kiss cam!”
You pulled away from Joel just in time to see yourselves on the giant screen and you laughed, going back to kiss him again.
***
“I’m glad you two seem to have figured your shit out,” Tommy had told him while they set up the grill. “She really does seem great.”
“She is,” Joel said, watching you talk with Maria, looking so damn pretty in your little skirt and boots. “Fuck, she’s incredible.”
“Anyone who can actually get you to feel something is a winner in my book,” Tommy replied, hooking up the propane tank. “Not sure what’s thicker, your skull or the space around your heart.”
Joel laughed but he knew his brother had a point. He hadn’t been in a relationship - a real one - in a very long time. It had been even longer since he’d felt anything close to this for anyone. He’d gone from falling in love with you to just being in love with you and it had happened so quickly it was hard for him to even see it at first.
He’d just known it when your father had shown up at your door that day. Joel knew what he was after - some other way to manipulate you, he was sure - and it made his blood boil. He had to consciously stop himself from hitting the man. The only reason he didn’t was because he knew it would hurt you if he did. But he knew he had to protect you, had to be the one standing in between you and the man who’d done nothing but neglect and harm you your entire life.
His whole body burned with it. He wished he could have gone back in time somehow and protected you then, too. Made it so you didn’t have to go through any of it and stand between you and anyone who had ever so much as looked at you wrong. None of them deserved you. Neither did he, for that matter, but he could at least protect you from the worst of them.
He knew he loved you then. He couldn’t conceive of how anyone could look at you and do anything that would willfully hurt you, how anyone could look at you and see anything but one of the greatest things the world had ever let happen.
But he didn’t want to scare you off, so he kept it to himself, instead just doing everything he could to take care of you, get you to spend some time with him.
It turned out, he didn’t need to try that hard. It seemed like you were just as eager to see him as he was to see you.
You texted him over lunch on a day you were working from home, a picture of all the makings for mac and cheese and a BluRay of Jupiter Ascending, a movie Joel had heard was laughably bad and he’d been meaning to watch at some point.
“Your place or mine?” You asked.
Joel smiled.
“Wherever you are, Beautiful, I’ll be there.”
You asked to come to his place so you could actually get out of your house for a bit and you showed up not long after Joel had gotten out of the shower, a pan of macaroni and cheese ready to go in the oven and a grocery bag over your arm with all the fixings for Bloody Marys.
“I. Found. Bacon. Vodka,” your eyes were wide and excited. “It’s going to be amazing!”
You were right, it was amazing. Everything with you was amazing.
Because he loved you.
“You told her yet?” Tommy asked as they say next to each other on the gate of his truck during lunch.
“Told who what?” Joel asked, looking down at his phone for the umpteenth time since his lunch break started. You’d texted him a picture of a rather pathetic looking sandwich.
“This food truck’s a bust,” you said. “Feeling very let down. I require real food. Dinner?”
Joel was about to type out a response when you sent a selfie from what had to be a bathroom stall at your office, your shirt unbuttoned an extra button from what it had been when you’d gone your separate ways that morning.
“In case you needed motivation,” you wrote.
“Tell your girlfriend that you’re in love with her,” Tommy said.
Joel frowned and actually looked up from his phone.
“I didn’t…”
“Don’t need to say it,” Tommy clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m not blind and I might not be a genius but I ain’t that dumb. You’ve got it bad.”
Joel glared at him for a second.
“S’too early,” he muttered. “Don’t wanna scare her off.”
“You’re practically living with this woman,” he said. “She brought steak to your house the other night. Besides the blip, what’s the longest you’ve gone without seeing her since you started dating?”
Joel was happy that, after the mall incident, Tommy was understanding without Joel needing to be too specific about what happened with your father. He’d just told Tommy “It was a tough family thing, makes our shit look like child’s play.” Tommy just said “Damn, poor girl, shit’s rough” and had only ever called it “the blip” from then on.
“Just a work day, really,” Joel said.
“Don’t think it’s too early for shit, man,” Tommy said. “Just don’t fuck it up. And figure out how to tell your kid because I’m shit at keeping secrets.”
Joel sighed and nodded to his brother before texting you back.
“Never need much motivation with you,” he said. “Can’t let you starve on me. Come over, I’ll grill you a burger.”
When you fell asleep naked in his bed that night, he just watched you breathe, wondering how to tell you how he felt and how to tell his daughter that he was head over heels for her best friend.
So when you’d all but blurted it out at him at the game, it was a relief. He’d been terrified it would slip out of him for almost two weeks now. That he’d hand you something, you’d say “thank you” and, instead of “you’re welcome” he’d say “I love you.” That he’d kiss you on the way out the door in the morning and instead of “goodbye” it would be “I love you.” That he’d be looking at your perfect face as you rode him and he’d gasp “I love you” as he came deep inside.
It was a relief to know you felt it, too. It was a relief to say it out loud. It was a relief to feel the sense of security that settled into him at those words, the sense that this wasn’t something that would be easily undone. That this was something he could be safe in feeling, that he could rely on the connection he had with you that had gone from tenuous to vital so fast it made his head spin.
The rest of the game, he couldn’t keep his hands off of you. You were either perched on his leg or standing right in front of him for the rest of the game, his hands on your waist, pressing his lips into your neck and cheek, each kiss just another “I love you” in his mind. He couldn’t even tell you the score by the end of the game, only knowing that UT won because everyone else around them seemed almost as happy as he was.
Joel was eager to say his goodbyes to Tommy and Maria when they dropped the two of you off at your apartment. It’s not like he didn’t always want you - he always wanted you - but it was urgent now, a driving need more than a want.
You, it seemed, were on the same wavelength. The front door was barely closed when you took fistfuls of his shirt and pulled him against you, kissing him deeply as you walked backwards deeper into your home.
He pulled your hat off first, tossing it on your loveseat on the way back to your bedroom. You went from using his shirt to hold him close to tugging it up and over his head as he did the same with yours.
In the bedroom, you turned so he was against the bed as you deftly opened his pants and pushed them and his boxer briefs down and off. You nudged him down onto the bed and looked him in the eyes as you slipped your panties down your legs, leaving on the little miniskirt that Joel had so wanted to fuck you in before the game.
You straddled him, your arms resting on his shoulders, his hands on your back, fingers spread wide to touch as much of you as he could. He slowly, almost reverently, removed your bra, cupping your breasts for a moment before holding onto you again. You aligned your entrance with his cock, the head of him just inside of you.
He held your gaze, his nose brushing yours, breathing the same air you were. He looked deep in your eyes as you started sinking onto him, your breath hitching as you did.
“I love you,” he breathed, mouth so close to yours his lips brushed your own when he spoke.
“Joel,” you managed, your body soft and warm against him as you took him into yourself. “I love you, I…”
You gasped as he bottomed out within you and he clutched onto you, needing to be as close to you as he could possibly be.
The two of you just looked at each other for a moment, your skin on his, his cock buried deep within you.
He realized then that he’d never been inside someone he was in love with before you. He’d tried with Sarah’s mother but her resentment kept any real affection from becoming too deep. Everything before her has been for fun, he hadn’t been looking for anything permanent. No relationship had lasted long enough to actually fall for anyone since.
It was an intense thing, knowing you loved him back while being a part of you. You always felt incredible, better than anything or anyone else he’d ever felt, but it was different now and he never wanted to be anywhere but with you.
You took a deep, shaky breath before rising slowly over him. He could feel every inch of you, the tight grip of every ridge, the wet heat of you holding him perfectly inside. He kissed you as you started to ride him, moaning into your mouth, sinking his fingers into your soft skin.
Your skirt bunched around your hips and you ground your clit against him and he relished it, loving the feeling of you finding your pleasure with his body.
He met you stroke for stroke until you came over him with a whimper, kissing him deeper, pussy gushing over his cock.
Joel moved you below him, settling between your thighs, his body still tight to yours for a moment before he separated from you.
“Joel,” you whimpered, breasts heaving. He slid a hand up your stomach, drinking you in, eyes lingering on the place disappeared into you, your sex swollen and slick.
“Want to see you,” he panted, moving his hands to the inside of your knees, slipping them over your thighs until one thumb found your clit and the other slipped around your hip to your lower back, your sexy little skirt pushed up around your waist now. “Want to see you come for me.”
He started driving into you, pulling back almost reluctantly to thrust back as deep as he could reach, watching it move through your body, the ripple of your skin, the bounce of your breasts, the desperate look on your face as he worked your clit, your channel tightening around him.
“That’s it,” he panted as you ground your hips back against him when he thrust deep. “Are you close, Beautiful? That perfect little pussy about to come for me?”
You nodded and moaned, one of your hands flying to the bed and tangling in the blanket.
“Good,” he said, all but breathless. “Need you to come all over me, need to feel you come, need to watch you come. Just let go baby, just come for me.”
He watched your orgasm take hold half a second before he felt it, your face lost in pleasure, your clit throbbing as he felt you come apart around his cock.
Joel fought to hold his own orgasm off for at least moment, wanting to enjoy your pleasure for as long as he could. But he didn’t last long, thrusting deep and all but collapsing on top of you as the peak of your climax triggered his own.
Once he’d come down from his high enough to be able to think, he rolled onto his side and took you with him, still buried deep in you, kissing you gently as he held your face in his hand.
“I love you, Joel,” you said softly. “I’ve never really said that to anybody but I love you.”
“I love you,” he said, letting the feeling wash over him as he was so impossibly close to you. “I love you so much.”
As he fell asleep in your bed with you in his arms, he wasn’t sure he’d ever meant anything more.
Next Chapter
A/N: AHHHH THEY SAID IT!
I just love these two, they're so cute working through their relationship shit. They're getting there, they really are!
Thank you for being here and for following their story. It's been so fun to share with you! Love you!!
#fanfic#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x oc#smut fic#joel miller smut#new in town
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Feeling Like I Never Should
read part II here
pairing: kirby reed x fem!reader x charlie walker
summary: kirby is your best friend, which is why she knows you and charlie will never get together without a little outside help.
wc: 3077
warnings: fem!reader, inexperienced!reader, inexperienced!charlie, dom!kirby(?), cursing/swearing, descriptions of alcohol & alcohol consumption, oral sex (f! receiving), fingering, unprotected sex (p in v), squirting, creampie, virginity loss
a/n: this is kinda very kirby centered but for good reason
Kirby is your best friend, and as your best friend she knows exactly when you need a push. Especially when it comes to Charlie. She loved to make the two of you squirm, to tease, to torment, until you were both a mess.
You like Charlie, maybe more than a friend should, but his obvious feelings for Kirby have stopped you from ever pursuing him as anything more than a friend. But Kirby knows something you don’t, that no matter how much she heckles or taunts Charlie, no one makes him squirm like you do.
His logic isn’t half bad, feign interest in her so that you don’t suspect his feelings for you, but one thing the dweeb never considered is that you might reciprocate his feelings. It’d be cute how oblivious the two of you are if it wasn’t so pathetic. Both of you pining over the other, too afraid to make a move.
“What are you doing tonight?” Kirby asks you, shutting your locker abruptly and startling you.
“Please stop doing that,” you groan, ever the unexpecting victim of Kirby’s jumpscares.
“You know I can’t,” Kirby says, disregarding your request. “So, any special Friday night plans?”
“I’m alone again this weekend, so probably just takeout and—” you begin to say, but Kirby interrupts you.
“And a rager?” She suggests jokingly.
“No,” you shoot down her idea quickly, even if she wasn’t being serious. “Charlie wants to come over to plan Stab-A-Thon and my sister left behind some werewolf trilogy so we’re probably gonna watch that,” you answer, bracing yourself for Kirby’s response.
“Sounds like a hot date,” she says sarcastically, reveling in your involuntary embarrassed reactions.
“Shut up. Why are you asking?” You say, changing the subject.
“Because Jill, Olivia, and I are going to a party and I thought I’d extend an invitation, but you have plans. So, invitation withdrawn,” she answers, a teasing lilt in her voice.
“You’re just gonna end up watching guys fawn over Olivia and Jill spend the entire time on the couch with Trevor,” you tell her, knowing that inevitably she will show up at your house sometime after two in the morning, drunk off her ass and complaining about how lame the party was.
“At least there’ll be some free booze. See you later!” Kirby says before walking away.
It doesn’t take long for you and Charlie to plan Stab-A-Thon for the third year in a row, sharing Chinese takeout while going over location, equipment, and all the other small details of the club’s most notorious event. Pretty soon you’re both sprawled over your couch, dissecting the first movie that your sister described as a feminist cult classic, your legs resting comfortably over Charlie’s lap.
“Honey! I’m home!” Kirby yells, interrupting the second movie, letting herself in with a copy of your house key that you gave her freshman year. “And I’m really drunk!”
“Is that Kirby?” Charlie asks when you pause the movie, confused.
“Yeah, I guess she decided to bail on the party early,” you say, getting up to bring her to the den.
“Ugh, you were right,” Kirby says when you meet her at your front door, struggling to take off her shoes. “Olivia left with some guy and Jill barely let go of Trevor’s arm. But I got this!” She says, kicking off her shoes and holding up a bottle of tequila.
“I don’t think you need anymore of that, come on, I’ll get you some water,” you say, leading her to the living room.
“Charlie! How’s the werewolf trilogy?” You hear Kirby ask while you go to the kitchen to get her water.
“Basically a high-budget snuff film,” you catch the end of Charlie’s thoughts on the movie when you come back with a water bottle for Kirby.
“Ooh, will it be brought up at the next club meeting?” Kirby asks, pulling your back to her chest when you join them on the couch, resting her chin over your shoulder.
“Maybe,” Charlie says, taking a swig of the tequila Kirby must have given him while you were in the kitchen.
“Drink some water, you need to sober up,” you tell Kirby, twisting in her hold to raise the now open water bottle to her lips.
“And you need to loosen up,” Kirby says, drinking the water reluctantly.
“Only if you drink some water,” you say, handing her the plastic bottle.
“That’s my girl!” She cheers, drinking more water while you turn back around to face Charlie.
Your fingers brush against Charlie’s when you take the tequila from him, lifting the heavy bottle to drink the unpleasant clear liquid. It burns as it goes down your throat, settling hot in your stomach, the heat seeping throughout your body. Your face scrunches at the bitter taste, and you already know Kirby’s gonna have something to say about that.
“Aw, do you need a chaser?” She teases, wrapping her arms around your waist, empty water bottle dropped to the floor.
“Something tells me you didn’t bring any,” you rasp, relinquishing the bottle back to Charlie.
“It’s not so bad,” Charlie says after taking another drink.
“I’ve had better,” you say, nursing the bottle, keeping it away from Kirby as she playfully bites your shoulder.
Without mixers, it’s not long before half the bottle is gone and you and Charlie are about equal to Kirby’s somewhat less intoxicated state. The movie is long forgotten, frozen at the end of the first act. The three of you are squished at one end of the couch, you’re slumped against Kirby, legs thrown over Charlie’s lap, listening to Kirby’s drunken rundown of the party she left and how she stole the bottle.
“Hold on, I gotta pee,” she says, pushing you off of her to run to the bathroom.
“Sorry,” you say, hearing Charlie groan when you’re shoved onto his lap.
“No, you’re fine,” he says, hoping you don’t realize the hard situation he’s in.
“I don’t think we’re gonna finish the trilogy tonight,” you giggle, laying back where Kirby was seated.
“Definitely not,” he says, hands nervously resting over your thighs.
“I’m back!” Kirby announces her return, and you sit up to let her return to her spot.
“That was fast,” you say, shifting halfway on Charlie’s lap, too distracted by Kirby to notice him throwing his head back, his hands just barely gripping your skin.
“God, you’re such a tease,” she says, pulling you off of his lap and towards her once she’s sat.
“What do you mean?” You ask, relaxing into her hold.
“Look what you’re doing to him,” she says, redirecting your focus to Charlie. “He’s pitching a tent just from you crawling over him like a little minx.”
“That’s not—” he tries to deny it, face flushing from being called out, but Kirby cuts him off.
“Are you gonna help him out with his problem or not?” She asks you, both you and Charlie shocked by her words.
“D-Do you want me to help you?” You ask him, head fuzzy from the night’s turn of events.
“Yes,” Charlie answers, and as soon as the word leaves his lips Kirby is pushing you onto his lap.
Your thighs straddle his hips, your hands finding purchase on his shoulders from being moved so abruptly. Looking between them, you’re unsure of what to do, but as your best friend, Kirby already knows of your lack of experience. She moves closer to the two of you, cupping your cheek and turning your head to face her. Leaning in, she presses her lips to yours, kissing you wantonly. You return the kiss, albeit a bit sloppily, lips parting when her tongue swipes at your bottom lip, licking into your mouth. She pulls away soon after, not wanting you to forget about Charlie.
“Kiss him like that,” she instructs you, turning your head back to face him.
You lean in, goosebumps rising across your skin as a shiver tingles down your spine from his intent gaze, pupils dilated from lust and alcohol. Pressing your lips to his, you copy Kirby’s movements the best you can, kissing him sensuously. He kisses you back hungrily, as if he wished to devour you. When your tongue swipes at his bottom lip, he parts his lips just as you did for Kirby, and follows your lead as your tongue meets his. The makeout is messy, both of you new to the act, and Kirby takes the opportunity to move Charlie’s hands to your hips from where they rested on your thighs.
“Move her however you like,” she whispers in his ear, giving him the go-ahead to grind you on his crotch.
Charlie’s hands move your hips slowly, his own hips bucking up to meet yours as you whine into his mouth. He’s not quiet either, low moans escaping him at the lewd acts unfolding. Your nails scratch at the fabric of his flannel, supporting yourself with his shoulders as heat pools in your core. Despite the layers between the two of you, the friction is just enough for a wet patch to appear in your panties.
“Alright, calm down, greedy boy,” Kirby says, pulling you away from the kiss by your shoulders. “Wouldn’t want you finishing before the main event,” she teases, having heard the desperation in his voice as the two of you began to get lost in pleasure.
“Be nice,” you tell her, the words slipping out without thought.
“You want me to be nice?” She asks, her mouth stretching into a devious smile. “Come here,” she says, scooting to the edge of the couch, back to the armrest, where she sat when she first arrived.
You make your way towards her, letting her flip you around to face Charlie when you get close, your back to her chest like before. Her fingers play with the hem of your top, soft lips brushing against your skin as she leans forward, whispering in your ear to lift your arms. You do as she says, arms rising above your head, and she pulls up your top, exposing you to Charlie. He’s watching attentively, you can feel his stare hardening when your bra comes into view, fabric lifting over your head and being thrown to the side.
“Come closer, Charlie,” Kirby says, and he doesn’t need to be told twice, moving closer to the two of you, slotting himself between your legs. “Isn’t she pretty?” Kirby asks, fondling you over your bra, and your breath hitches from her actions.
“Yes, she’s very pretty,” he says, voice low and airy.
“Do you wanna play with her tits?” Kirby asks, pulling the cups of your bra down to expose your breasts. “Go ahead,” she says, when Charlie only responds with a nod.
His hands are surprisingly cold, a shock to your overheated skin. Kirby undoes your bra, sliding the straps down your shoulders and stripping you of the last garment on your upper body before placing her hands on top of Charlie’s. She guides his hands to be less gentle, and you watch through hooded lids as he lowers his head to your chest.
His tongue flicks over your pert nipples, testing for your reaction, continuing when he hears your soft whines. Kirby pulls his hair back, giving you a better view as he mouths at your tits, licking and sucking your hardened buds, skin shining from his spit. She pulls him away from you harshly by his hair, holding him in place.
“If you wanna get your dick wet, you need to prep her,” Kirby says, letting go of him. “Take these off for her,” she instructs, snapping the waistband of your shorts and panties against you.
You lift your hips so that he can pull your bottoms off, and he accidentally pulls you closer to him, your head sliding down to rest against Kirby’s stomach. She doesn’t say anything, watching him push your legs up to slide the last of your clothes off. You’ve got your thighs pressed together tightly, feeling vulnerable being the only one naked, but Kirby doesn’t allow that for long. She forces your legs apart, giving Charlie a clear view of your wet cunt.
“This,” she says, one hand trailing down to spread your folds with two fingers. “Is her clit, play with it right and you both get a prize,” she continues, rubbing tight circles on the bud, making you mewl as your hips buck for more. “Be patient,” Kirby warns you, pulling her fingers away to hold your hips down, ignoring the whimper you let out from the loss of friction.
Charlie’s fingers replace Kirby’s, messy circles leaving you breathless as you moan quietly. Eyes screwed shut in pleasure, you don’t see him moving down until his mouth meets your core. He licks a broad stripe from your hole to your clit, sucking the bud experimentally between his lips. You’re left keening from his actions, Kirby’s hands keeping your thighs from shutting around his head and hips rolling for more.
“Good boy,” Kirby coos from behind you, watching Charlie eat your pussy like a man starved. What he lacks in experience, he makes up for in enthusiasm. “Now stretch her hole with your fingers,” Kirby instructs, ignoring your hands gripping the wrist of her hand holding your hips down.
Charlie slides a finger in tentatively, stroking your walls gently. You’re a whiny mess, begging for more, sweet voice echoing through the room. He slips another finger in, your tight walls sucking him in greedily. His thick fingers prod deep inside you, massaging a spot that has your stomach twisting in pleasure.
“Charlie,” you moan his name, breathing heavy as he fucks you open with his fingers, face flushing in embarrassment when you hear your pussy squelching lewdly.
“Is he making you feel good?” Kirby asks, and you nod quickly, thighs trembling as she holds your legs open. “Is he doing a good job?” She asks, enjoying the way you struggle to muster even a non-verbal response as you do your best to nod. “No, use your words, hon. Tell him how good he’s making you feel, how good of a job he’s doing,” she says, watching your glossy eyes meet Charlie’s.
“Feels so good, Charlie,” you say between ragged breaths, mewling when he thrusts his fingers harder. “You’re doing such a good job!” You cry, ears ringing and gripping Kirby’s arm tighter as you begin to teeter over the edge.
“Stop,” Kirby says, and you whine at the empty feeling when Charlie pulls his fingers out, your orgasm ruined. “Shh, don’t worry, love. You’ll get to come,” she reassures you, massaging your thighs. “Take your clothes off, Charlie,” she instructs him, and he wastes no time stripping.
“I don’t have a condom,” he says, down to his boxers, slowly moving back to where he was between your legs.
“You don’t need one, you’re both virgins and she’s on the pill,” Kirby says, pushing him to sit back to cushion, moving you onto his lap.
Your thighs shake when you straddle him this time, nothing separating the two of you now. His dick is pretty, pale with a pink, almost red, tip, shiny from leaking pre. He’s got a protruding vein on the underside, you lick your lips wishing you could trace it instead, a trimmed dark patch of curls trailing up.
“Spit,” Kirby says, interrupting your thoughts, holding your hand up to your mouth. “Good girl,” she praises you when you let your saliva dribble into the palm of your hand. “You’re lucky,” Kirby says to you, wrapping your hand around Charlie’s dick. “To have such a pretty cock as your first,” she finishes, pumping your fist leisurely around him.
The sight of Charlie is sinful, almost pornographic moans slipping past kiss-swollen lips. His hair is a little messy from Kirby’s rough handling, blue eyes glistening as he watches Kirby move your hand around him, hips desperately meeting yours for more. But Kirby reminds him who’s in charge, hand holding him in place just as she did you before stopping your movements altogether.
“Now sit,” Kirby says, pulling your hips up and lining him up with your entrance.
Charlie’s hands hold onto your hips as you sink further down, thick head stretching your hole as you lower. It’s not as painful as so many of your friends had said when they told you about their first time, moreso uncomfortable as his shaft stretches you wider than his fingers prepared you for. Your mouth is open in a silent cry, gravity forcing you further down and it feels like you’re being split apart.
“Are you okay?” Charlie asks when you’re fully seated, hands kneading your hips comfortingly.
“Yeah,” you answer, getting used to the full feeling, gaze shifting to Kirby’s, a question in your eyes.
“Ride him,” Kirby says, hands on top of Charlie’s, guiding you up and down his cock.
Your hands find themselves on his shoulders, stabilizing yourself as you’re bounced on his lap. You moan wantonly as the two of you move together, pleasure zinging through your bodies each time your hips slam down. Kirby removes her hands from Charlie’s, one instead softly tracing across your lower back as you lose yourself, trembling as he thrusts up to meet your movements.
A string of expletives leave his mouth, a whispered groan as he no doubt nears his release. It’s cute, Kirby thinks, how desperate the two of you are to finish. You hide your face in the space where his neck meets his shoulder, hands tugging at his hair as your hips struggle to keep up with his punishing pace, moaning incoherently into his skin.
But Kirby can’t have that, so she sneaks a hand between your bodies, rubbing frantic circles on your clit. Your whole body tenses up, taut like a string, biting into Charlie’s shoulder to muffle your wail as your release sprays against his stomach and thighs. He fucks you through it, despite your walls tightening to push him out, hips jerking as he pulls you down one last time, coming inside you.
Kirby is your best friend, but even in her drunken state she can recognize that maybe that’s not a good enough excuse for what she did tonight. Driving you into Charlie’s arms just because she doesn’t have the balls to admit she’s in love with you is somehow worse than Charlie’s misdirection strategy. But that’s a problem for hungover Kirby, she thinks.
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TA
Josh Lambert x fem!reader
Word Count: 2k
Warnings: age gap (legal ofc)
Author’s Note: this is not my best work and i WILL do josh better justice soon i swear to him
Summary: Josh comes for parents weekend and you, a TA for one of Dalton’s classes, take it upon yourself to flirt a bit.
I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director/creator
(not my gif)
You moved your hair out of your face. The canvas in front of you taunted you with its unfinished work. You took a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth. You took a step back. The line work was shotty but you could probably fix it with more paint. You put your hand over your chin, lost in thought.
The sound of the door opening broke you from your thoughts. You looked over your shoulder. The double doors of the classroom creaked open as Dalton peeked his head in. You raised an eyebrow, hand still over your mouth.
“Good morning Dalton,” you said, a small smile on your face. “Class isn’t for another thirty minutes. You’ve been Armagan.” He looked aside, eyes scanning the room. It felt too large for just you. You thought the class could’ve been taught somewhere more intimate but it was up to the school where you would end up.
“I know, I just thought I’d get a headstart. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“No worries. I don't think I’m gonna get any further with this anyway.” You let out a defeated sigh and put down your paintbrush. You clapped your hands together, trying to get any wet paint off your hands. Dalton awkwardly shuffled in around you. He went to his spot in the corner and started to get ready.
He had a bit of a schoolgirl crush on you. He tried not to show it on his face when he passed, a light blush on his cheeks. Your eyes followed him as he walked, putting his things down with a clatter. He winced at his own noise.
“Relax Dalton. I’m not gonna hound you for being loud.” You started to put your own paints away. You typically didn’t paint alongside the class. Armagan had picked you as her TA because you had graduated and were floating around the job space. She admired your natural ability to give direction. You were ten years older than Dalton but he swore you didn’t look it.
“I think it’s Armagan’s natural aura that makes me nervous,” he explained.
“She’s not even here,” you said, joking lightly.
“She lingers.” He sat down on his stool. You worked separately, putting things away and putting them up.
“Are you ready for parents weekend?” Dalton groaned, involuntarily. He had been actively blocking it out.
“My parents are divorced. I haven’t been ready for a parents weekend since I was 7.” You nodded once. “They’ll drive up separately and go to separate classes. My mom is a real talker.” You smiled. The parents were supposed to go around to classes and mingle among teachers. It was real old school and only worked because the school was small, but some teachers swore by it. You liked to hang around some of the classes to see who had birthed some of your less desirable students. You had seen some sketches of Dalton’s mom. She seemed like a nice lady.
“I hope to meet her.”
“I’m sure you will, if you’re within a five mile radius.”
-
Parents weekend approached steadily. Campus loved it. Everyone got to bring out their tents and sell things, make conversation about different parties and clubs. People handed out free food, there were a thousand people in the buildings, endless families sitting on blankets in the courtyard. You had decided to stay with Armagan after lunch and see who wandered in. They mostly wanted to talk with her, which you didn’t mind. You could people watch and eat snacks all day.
“So you teach him to paint? He knows how to paint,” someone's dad was muttering. Armagan cleared her throat.
“We teach them to hone their craft. Sometimes people don’t understand why they do things and we make an attempt to bring that out of them. Connect with their inner selves that aren’t able to make a public appearance.” The man snorted.
The windows were pushed open to let in the cool fall air. It brushed past your shoulders as the door opened again. People were waiting in line to chat with Armagan, helping themselves to the treats she had put out on the teachers desk. You pushed yourself off the stool and walked through the crowd when you saw Dalton. Standing with him was a man, taller than him, with a similar looking gaze.
Dalton smiled when he saw you.
“Hey,” he said. The familiar red cheeks were back. His dad seemed to notice them.
“Dalton! Nice of you to come.” You turned your head to Dalton’s dad. “You must be his brother.” Josh snorted, shaking his head.
“I’m his dad.”
“Please don’t flatter him,” Dalton mumbled, shaking his head. You outstretched your hand. He shook it.
“Josh Lambert.”
“Very nice to meet you Josh. I’m Y/N, I TA for Armagan’s class. I’m not the big guns but I promise, I’m easier on the eyes.” Dalton was staring at you, you could feel it. Your eyes stayed locked with Josh’s and suddenly you remembered what Dalton had said about his parents being divorced. Your collarbone felt hot.
Josh’s smile grew and his hand slipped out of yours.
“You don’t have to tell me that,” he promised.
“Oh my God dad,” he muttered. Armagan ushered for Dalton and Josh to come forward. Josh walked first and you nudged Dalton.
“You didn’t tell me your dad was hot,” you muttered.
“Why would I tell you that?”
“Common courtesy!”
-
Most parents were filling out on Sunday. Some stayed later, insisting on more time with their kids. You could only imagine what the hotel booking around the weekend looked like. On Sunday night you happened to be in class, setting up things for Monday. You were technically supposed to do it the same day of class but the rooms were completely empty until your class. And it was easier to do it the night before than wake up any earlier than you had to.
Dalton turned the corner. He was followed by both of his parents, who wanted a private tour of the area now that there were less people. Renai made up a fake story about wanting to see what she was paying for. She really just wanted a little bit more time with her son.
“The library’s upstairs,” he explained, half bored. He was pretending not to like spending time with his parents. He missed them too. Sometimes.
“Well I would like to see it,” Renai said, a smile on her face. “I didn’t get to see this building earlier. This has Armagan’s class right?”
“Yeah, down the hall,” Dalton said, gesturing to his left. Josh’s head swiveled, a gentle thump in his chest at remembering it.
“I wanna see the library first,” Renai said.
“Which way is the bathroom?” Josh asked. Dalton pointed lazily. Josh nodded. “I’ll meet you guys back down here?” They were only half listening. Renai’s voice could be heard as they went up the stairs, talking gently back and forth.
Josh turned the corner into the bathroom. His mind lingered on you, even as he washed his hands, staring at himself in the mirror. It was a brief interaction and he felt a small pit in his stomach at stealing Dalton’s thunder. Clearly he liked you, even if it was just a little. Josh thought the compliments might have been courtesy. Maybe you said that to every dad that walked through the door. Maybe you were just trying to make Dalton laugh.
Your voice remained in his head as he turned the corner into the classroom he had met you in. He didn’t bother knocking, sure it was empty this time of night. He opened the door slowly, surprised to see a glow of light.
You raised your head. You had only one overhead switch on, illuminating just the middle of the large room. When you turned with inquisitive eyes, you were met with just a shadow. You sat up completely.
“Hello?”
“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry. I thought there was no one here.” You stood up, recognizing the voice. You were organizing canvases on the ground. They were scattered all over, some in different sizes and colors. Your instructions were scrawled on a piece of notepaper that you could barely read.
“Josh?”
He opened the door a little more, bringing himself in the light. He gave you a thin lipped smile.
“I’m just waiting for Dalton and his mom.” You nodded once.
“I was getting ready for class tomorrow. I’m not an early bird,” you explained.
“I understand,” he said, nodding. He knew the early teaching days. “I teach English back home.I used to stay late after class to set up the lesson plan, rather than getting up any earlier than necessary.” Your eyes went wide with a bright smile.
“You teach English?” He nodded once, coming closer into the light. He had his hands in his pockets, trying not to be too affected by your gaze. “That’s so cool. That was one of my gazillion life ideas but I didn’t like arguing with other people’s opinions. I’m kidding. Kinda.” Josh laughed gently. He gestured towards what you were doing on the ground.
“Busy night ahead then?”
“Yes sir,” you mumbled, turning back to it.
“You could probably bribe Dalton to help. I think he has a little crush on you.” Josh just kept speaking and he didn’t even hear what he was saying until it was gone. It took everything in him not to close his eyes in embarrassment. You raised an eyebrow, pursing your lips. “Don’t tell him I said that.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” you said, laughing gently. “Plus, Dalton’s a little young for my taste,” you admitted.
Josh’s eyes almost popped out of his head. So he wasn’t imagining it. You were most definitely coming onto him.
“How long are you staying in town?” you asked. He opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. You suddenly got a little bit worried you had been too aggressive. If he was anything like his son, he was a bit shy. “Sorry, I don’t mean that in a weird way. Unless you want it to be a weird way, I just wasn’t sure how to-”
“No, no,” he assured you. “I like the weird way.” This time he shut his eyes in surprise. “I’m sorry, I haven’t done this in a while.”
“We’re doing something?”
“Are we not?”
Your nerves settled into a small knowing smile. Josh looked at you expectantly.
“We are,” you promised. “If you’re not busy, I should be done here in about an hour,” you offered. He nodded, releasing some of the stress that came with this conversation.
“That would be great.”
“Awesome. You don’t think Dalton would mind?”
“I don’t wanna step on his feet but you are a couple years older than him.”
“You’re a couple years older than him Mr.Lambert.”
“Something tells me that you don’t mind.” His voice had grown some confidence and edge to it. You leaned back, nodding.
“You’re a smart cookie.” Voices came from the still open door. You both turned towards it.
“So this is it?” Renai asked. Dalton pushed the door open. He came to a slow stop when he saw the two of you, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.
“Hey Dalton.”
“This is my TA,” he explained to his mom. “What are you guys doing in here? Alone?”
“I was waiting for you guys,” Josh explained.
“I’m setting up for tomorrow,” you said. Dalton looked between the two of you. His jaw set in suspicion. “We were just chatting.”
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Lucky Charm ~ Lando Norris
Summary: Y/N finally decides she’s ready to brave the chaos of race day at the paddock, and the boys are more than happy to give her the introduction she deserves
liked by georgerussell63, alex_albon, and 51,292 others
ynusername: imola here I come 🇮🇹
2,282 comments
username1: ofc she’s going to support lando
alex_albon: who said anything about lando?? maybe she’s there to cheer for me??
landonorris: can’t wait to see you bby 🔥
username3: I swear these two are complete goals
username4: it’s not fair how one person can be this pretty
carlossainz55: there’s a seat in ferrari with your name on
maxverstappen1: woah there! we’ve already called dibs on having her at red bull
landonorris: um excuse me…I think you’ll find y/n will be spending her weekend with me
ynusername: you lot are the worst 🤦🏻♀️
username5: I love seeing all my favourite people argue
username6: this is my highlight and the race hasn’t even begun yet…
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landonorris just posted
liked by carlossainz55, oscarpiastri and 728,220 others
landonorris: race day ready with my lucky charm by my side 🍀
tagged: ynusername
83,271 comments
username7: mum and dad 🥺
ynusername: cannot wait to cheer for you tomorrow!! ily
landonorris: ily so much more ❤️
danielricciardo: @landonorris i love you more than y/n does
ynusername: @danielricciardo that’s impossible
username8: how have we survived waiting this long for paddock y/n and lando
charles_leclerc: it was worth the wait tho…right?
username9: can you pls just marry each other now and have lots of beautiful babies
alex_albon: how do you race for 2 hours and still manage to look this good norris
landonorris: @alex_albon you just need a y/n in your life, she always leaves me looking a million dollars
alex_albon: @lilymhe get better
ynusername: @alex_albon oi we do not accept lily slander in this household
landonorris: ahem, aside from me ofc
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˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊
ynusername posted
liked by landonorris, lewishamilton and 39,201 others
ynusername: ready for the race and to cheer for my man! 🏎️🏁
tagged: landonorris
4,926 comments
carlossainz55: if you’re cheering for your man, why are you not wearing my shirt??
username10: excuse me sir?? you are very much mistaken
ynusername: if I was cheering for my favourite ex team mate of lando’s then you’d be my number 1 😍
danielricciardo: 💔💔💔💔
landonorris: did I ever tell you how good papaya looks on you?
landonorris: I just know I’ll win today with my lucky charm watching over me 🩷
username11: pls can we all adopt y/n as our lucky charm
francisca.cgomes: how have you been here 2 days and you’ve still not come to visit me
pierregasly: ha! she’s come to visit me, how does it feel to be second fave??
ynusername: @francisca.cgomes just saving the best til last aye
username12: if we do not see y/n at every race from now on there will be a protest
username13: I just want a love like theirs…is that too much to ask for??
georgerussell63: if you want a shirt upgrade y/n then just lemme know…
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊
landonorris just posted
liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren and 1,291,749 others
landonorris: cloud nine ☁️ p1 and an evening with my best friend…what more could a guy want?
tagged: mclaren and ynusername
82,201 comments
oscarpiastri: that reminds me mate, I’m in the room next door, have you got any ear defenders?
ynusername: OSCAR PIASTRI!! SHUT YOUR MOUTH
landonorris: good idea, it’s gonna get loud tonight!
mclaren: another top week lando, well done! this lucky charm of yours might have to show up more often
username14: I don’t want this race weekend to end
username15: pls lord don’t let this be the last time we see y/n at a race
danielricciardo: congrats bud, fully deserved!!
maxverstappen1: a million dollars for y/n to be my lucky charm next weekend
landonorris: no amount of money will ever let me give y/n to you…she’s mine only
carlossainz55: is it possible to love two people more?
ynusername: stop with the third wheel dramatics!!
ynusername: had the best time ever!! can’t wait to do it all again soon my love 🩷
#f1#f1 imagine#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#lando norris#lando norris imagine#lando norris au#f1 au#formula 1 au#f1 x reader#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#formula 1 x you#f1 reaction#f1 social media#formula 1 social media#lando norris social media
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nerves and motorcycle rides
SOUL EATER EVANS x FEM!READER
[a/n: i'm gonna change my theme so i'll add a header later but i've been rewatching my favorite shows so expect more of these! enjoy !! <3]
© bunnyywritings pls don't use my headers or writing without permission
wc: 1.5k words
warnings: a few swear words and modern!au kinda lol
Maka eyed Soul in amusement, watching as her weapon partner gazed at you in the cafeteria. You had been chatting it up with your meister as you two waited in line, trays in hand. Soul had been crushing on you bad. He was disheartened because he thought you and your partner were a couple but that couldn’t be farther from the truth.
She had spoken to you at a party a few days ago and subtly asked if you were seeing anyone. You adamantly denied it as your eyes searched the small crowd until falling on a familiar head of white hair, a deep red blush on your cheeks that you had hoped Maka had waved off as the liquor in your cup, that you definitely should not have been drinking.
From then on it was almost sickening to see the sweet unnoticed glances the both of you threw at each other.
“Soul, just ask her out already.” Tsubaki suggested lightheartedly, stealing the words that were about to roll off of Maka’s tongue.
The blonde nodded in agreement. “Yeah, Soul. Cool guys should speak up about what they’re feeling.” She teased.
“Tch, forget it.” He turned back to look at his food, pushing it around with a fork. “She’s already with someone.”
“Who? (Y/n)? No she’s not.” Kid hummed as he, Liz, and Patty took their seats at the table.
“How would you know?” Soul grimaced, waiting for some kind of punchline.
“Cause she said so.” Patty shrugged like it was the most obvious thing ever.
“She comes over to get her nails done by Liz and she’s surprisingly very gossip-y.” Kid took a sip of his water.
“Yeah, she said she had her eye on someone.” Liz moved her eyebrows suggestively at Soul. “She was trying to be vague about her description but it was obviously you.”
Soul said nothing as he processed all this information. As long as he had known you, you were always a little shy and closed off. Maka and the others had helped you out of your cocoon so, when you all hung out together outside of school, he got to see another side of you. Your boisterous laughter was melodic and infectious, your smiles unabashed and wide, even going as far as throwing around sarcastic and snarky quips here and there. It was his favorite thing to see your cheeks rosy as you joined Patty in whatever silly antics possessed her.
“Hey guys!” Your meister grinned as you both took a seat. Your eyes scanned everyone before they met Soul’s. He could’ve sworn they lit up as you sent a shy smile his way.
Oh Lord, you were gonna be the death of him.
The weekend came rather quickly and Soul found himself bored and alone at home. Maka had gone to the library with Tsubaki and Kid to study and Blair was working a shift at Chupa Cabra’s. He had cleaned to keep busy but after that, there really wasn’t much to do and it was only 12pm.
“Oh man, this is totally uncool.” He muttered, slumping into the couch cushion. He stared at the wall for a bit before a vibration against his thigh snapped him out of his daze. Hastily pulling it out of his pocket, he flipped it over and his heart started to beat faster at your picture filling his screen. He cleared his throat.
“Hey, what’s up?”
His voice sent a shiver down your spine. “H-Hey Soul, are you-are you busy?”
“Not at all.” Never too busy for you is what he really wanted to say.
“Okay, uhm well I was gonna grab s-some coffee and maybe go shopping.” You paused and he waited patiently for you to continue. “I was wondering if you wanted to maybe come with me?”
He was stunned silent, you wanted to hang out with him? “But only if you want to! There’s-uhm there’s no pressure, obv-obviously.” He thought your panic was cute.
“Yeah, that sounds like fun. I’m in. I’ll pick you up in…20 minutes. S’that okay?”
“Y-yeah! Yes, more than okay. See you in twenty!” He could hear your beaming smile and it made his lips stretch into one as well.
“I’ll see you in twenty.” He confirmed before hanging up.
He rushed to get dressed, grabbing his extra helmet before driving the familiar route to your apartment.
Your fingertips were buzzing with nervous excitement as you waited for Soul, however, as a familiar motorcycle came rumbling to a stop not too far from you, your nerves skyrocketed. How could you forget he drove a motorcycle?!
“Hey! Ready to go?” He smiled so gently at you, it almost made you forget about your nerves entirely. Keyword: almost.
“Uhm y-yeah, I just uh…I’ve never been on a-a motorcycle before.” Your cheeks were incredibly red and he eyed as you fiddled with your nails.
“Ah shit, I should’ve asked if that was okay.” He was mentally smacking his forehead. “I could get us an Uber or something?”
“N-No! That’s okay, I don’t mind…just a little nervous.”
“Are you sure?” He’d just die if he ever made you feel uncomfortable.You nodded, determination clear in your eyes that made a little smirk lift the edge of his mouth. “Alright, hop on.”
He got on first, holding the bike steady as you climbed on the seat behind him. You had the visor up on the helmet and he thought it was adorable to see how it squished your cheeks a little bit. “You can wrap your arms around me to hold on.” He looked down and watched as your shaky hands wrapped around his torso. “Hold on tight, m’kay?” You nodded. “If you want me to slow down, tap twice.” He felt your hand gently smack against where it rested near his hip.
“Good. Just like that.” His praise made your breath hitch.
When he pulled away from the curb, he grinned at the muffled squeak that came from you before you leaned into him even more, arms tightening around him. You were so warm, he could get addicted to your touch if you’d let him.
At a light, he rested his feet against the ground and without really thinking, he rested his hand atop yours. The feeling of his hand had startled you slightly but you definitely weren’t complaining. A surge of confidence filled your body and you shifted your fingers so they slotted between his. He glanced down and almost couldn’t believe it, the back of your hand was a little cold against his warm palm so his thumb moved to gently caress your skin in an attempt to warm you up.
His coffee seemed to taste sweeter than usual but he chalked it up to the rose colored tint that you brought to his life. He had bought a few things at the thrift you had suggested going to but he was most grateful for having been able to see you step in and out of the dressing rooms, asking his opinions on outfits, both of you turning red when you had meekly stepped out in a short black skirt with cherries on it.
Sadly, the day was coming to an end and he had to drop you off back home.
But as he parked and helped you off of his bike, you seemed to be trying to prolong going inside. You gazed at him for a second. He was leaning on his bike and facing you, half sitting on his seat with his legs spread. He was also letting himself take you in. You had gotten cold and he had gladly given you his blue pullover to wear.
“Okay…well uhm th-thanks Soul. I had fun.”
“Yeah, me too…” He looked down at his feet, desperately thinking of something else to say.
You smiled sadly, upset that you were so scared to make a move. “Goodnight.” He echoed the sentiment and watched you slump back into your apartment building, still in his sweater.
“I’m such an idiot.” He groaned, moving to pull his helmet on.
“Soul!” Surprised, he halted his movements and rested the helmet in his lap.
“(Y/n)? What happe-” You rushed over and he was cut off when your lips met his. He immediately reciprocated and held your waist so you didn’t fall over, smiling into the kiss when a small noise left your throat, deepening it and pulling you closer until your hands rested against his chest.
Pulling away, you refused to meet his eyes. So he gently gripped your chin and turned your gaze back to him. “Can I kiss you again?” His pleading tone made you weak in the knees, his thumb grazing your bottom lip. You muttered, “Yes.” And he dove right back in.
Once he was home, a dazed smile was permanently on his lips.
Not even the text message from your weapon in the groupchat could change that.
fucking finally !!
[image attached]
If anything, he was glad that the moment was captured, almost straight out of a movie.
#soul eater x reader#soul eater evans x reader#soul eater fluff#soul eater x fem!reader#soul eater evans x fem!reader
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grease is the word (b.r.b)
note: this is for @gretagerwigsmuse and @cottagecori who heard me say "bradley bradshaw as danny zuko" and then let me run wild with it. technically part of like father, like daughter but does not have to be read in the context of same mistakes at all
summary: Bradley gets the role of Danny Zuko in the school play. That's it, that's the thought.
warnings: swearing, a dash of angst, kissing
word count: 4.3k
“So I’m going to be in the school musical.” Bradley says, lifting himself up to sit on the kitchen counter. “We’re doing Grease, and they needed someone to play Danny Zuko-“
You choke on your fried rice.
Slider pats you on the back as you croak out a “What?”
“You’ve never shown interest in theater before now.” Carole says with a raised eyebrow.
“Yeah, well I’m friends with one of the assistant directors-“
“He means he has a crush on her.” Your Dad clarifies with a wink. A goofy grin appears on his face, his cheeks turning a dusty pink as he shrugs.
“Maybe a little. Anyways, Janie is in my AP Euro class and asked if I could come play the piano for rehearsals. They didn’t have anyone audition for Danny and asked if I could read some of the lines and- well, I guess now I’m gonna be playing Danny.”
The thought of Bradley in a leather jacket, his curls greased back, singing Greased Lightning- you could swoon.
“Well, that’s exciting.” Carole says. “I’m excited to come see you. The show is early November, right?”
He nods as his Mom walks over to the calendar on the wall. “The 4th through the 6th.”
“We’ll be there.”
-
“So I heard your boyfriend is gonna be in the school musical.”
You sigh as you cringe, not even turning around to face the person you know is behind you.
Arguably, Sienna was the person closest to you. You’d say she was your best friend, someone you spent the most time with.
“Whose boyfriend?”
And then there’s that. Sienna had a whole separate friend group from you, people she’d probably say were her best friends.
Sienna slides into the desk next to you, turning to face the twins, Madison and Matt.
“Heard Bradshaw’s in the play.” Lexi says, sitting down at the desk opposite to you.
“Her boyfriend.” Sienna says, throwing you a smirk.
“He’s not- Shut up Sienna, you’re gonna get me in trouble.” You mumble, watching Bradley and Janie enter the classroom of your home room.
“Ohhh, I see.” Sienna says, flipping her long hair over her shoulder as she turns back in her seat.
“Do you want to come to the mall with us after school?” Madison asks, leaning behind you as Ben waves, sitting down behind Lexi.
“She can’t. She’s not supposed to be driving with people who don’t have their license.” Bradley says, sliding into the seat in front of you as he tugs off his backpack.
“I have my permit.” Madison argues as her brother shoots a “No one asked you, Bradshaw.”
“Hey, your Dad’s deploying soon, right?” Ben whispers, scooting his desk closer to you. “How long?”
“Six weeks, supposedly.”
“You always gotta multiply it by two.” Sienna jokes.
“Or divide by half, if he gets himself injured again.” Bradley says, though he doesn’t turn to face the group.
“I’m disregarding the fact that you even said anything.”
“So… the mall?”
“She has to run lines with me, I need the extra practice.” Bradley says with a wink, finally facing the group.
“Bradley-“
“Alright, alright, that’s enough of the chatter. I know it’s Monday and you all want to gossip about your weekends but let’s save that for after morning announcements.” Mr. Parker, your home room teacher interrupts, dropping his bag on the desk.
A note appears in your peripheral vision, and you take it discreetly from Sienna before Bradley can notice.
Mall with Madison and me?
You sigh, scrawling back Better not, Bradley’ll tattle.
“Fucking Bradshaw.” Matt whispers.
-
“Here comes your boyfriend.”
Sienna flinches as you slam your locker shut. “Cut that shit out, would you Sienna? He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Yet.”
“Hey ladies.” Bradley says, coming up behind you, leaning on the lockers. “You ready to go?”
“Hey Bradley.” A senior girl you’ve only ever seen in the hallway, appears in your vision as Bradley straightens.
“Hey Clara.” He says, nodding to the two girls behind her who are giggling. “Ava, Tracy.”
“So, I hear you’re gonna be playing Danny Zuko in the school musical.”
He nods, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I am.”
“Well, you must be so nervous.” Clara says, shouldering her way in between you and Bradley. Your jaw drops as Sienna steadies you, April appearing over her shoulder.
“What the fuck dude.” Sienna mutters as you roll your shoulders, turning to face the pair.
“Well, kinda. I’ve never been in a play before so..” Bradley trails off, eyebrows threading together as the three of you give him unimpressed looks.
“Well, if you ever want anyone to read lines with, I can play Sandy…” Clara says, hand landing on his bicep.
“Well, I appreciate the sentiment but I, uh, already have someone to run lines with.” Bradley says, pointing to you. Clara turns as if this is the first time she’s seen you.
“Oh.” She wrinkles her nose. “Well, if you change your mind, just let me know.”
Clara isn’t even out of earshot before Sienna starts fake gagging.
“Vomit, Bradshaw.” April says, shaking her head. “That was gross.”
“Whatever, April.” Bradley says, setting his hands on your shoulder. “C’mon, let’s get out of here.”
-
“So why do you even need help running lines in the first place? You’ve been in the play for like, five minutes.” You ask as you sit down at the Bradshaw kitchen table.
“I’m already two rehearsals behind, I’ve got to catch up.” Bradley says, opening the fridge door.
“Who’s playing Sandy?”
“Do you know Lacy Thomas?”
“The freshman?” You ask, raising an eyebrow. “Yeah, cause that’s not gonna start any drama.”
Bradley shuts the door of the fridge, revealing two Cokes. “See, you’re already preparing me. I don’t even know any of the drama gossip.”
You roll your eyes. “I think you’ll do just fine.”
He sighs, sitting down across from you. “Yeah, Janie said the same thing, but I don’t know, I’m kinda nervous about some of the scenes. What if I slip on the bleachers during Summer Nights?”
Bradley slides the scene he wants to rehearse across the table to you as he talks. “Bradley, this one of the most memorable scenes from the movie, are you sure you need my help?” You ask.
The look he gives you is pleading. “Please humor me here, Danny is a bit of a sleaze and that is so not how I was raised and I’m just-”
“Fine, Bradshaw. God.” You exclaim, rolling your eyes, even though deep down you’re flattered Bradley is entrusting you with this. “I’ll help you alright?”
“Okay, here goes nothing.” He says, clearing his throat.
“W-what are you doing here? I- I thought you were going back to Australia!”
“We had a change of plans.” You mimic, doing your best to channel Olivia Newton-John.
“I can’t- I mean, that’s cool baby, you know how it is. Rocking and rolling and whatnot- I can not do this.” He says with a groan. “Why is he so gross?”
“I think that’s the point, B.”
He groans again, collapsing into the table. “I give up.”
-
You feel giddy almost, walking up the steps of the school. You should be just right on time, if rehearsal got out when it was supposed to.
You were so excited to show Bradley that you had driven here, excitement almost making you skip towards the double doors of the auditorium where they’d been holding a majority of the rehearsals.
Bradley didn’t even know you were coming, which only made your excitement grow even more.
“Ron, can you pick Bradley up after rehearsal today?” Carole asked as she grabbed her purse from the counter. You both look up at her from where you’re discussing your English homework with your Uncle. “The Bronco is still in the shop and I’m going in for a last minute cover from Sally.”
“Can I pick him up?” You ask, fiddling with your pencil. “I can take Slider’s truck, if that’s okay with you?”
Slider shrugs. “I don’t have a problem with it, now that you’ve got your learner’s permit.” Slider says with a nudge to your shoulder.
Carole sighs, digging around in her bag for her keys. “Sounds good. There’s leftover lasagna in the fridge for dinner.” Carole presses a kiss to your head and then calls out, “Be on good behavior.” as she leaves the house.
You’re hoping you and Bradley can go out to dinner instead of eating the leftover lasagna, or maybe go get milkshakes to celebrate his progress in the play.
You turn the corner into the courtyard when you spot them.
You freeze.
Bradley’s got one of his arms leaned up on the metal poles that outline the corridors of the campus, other hand in his pocket as he talks to Janie. She’s looking up at him, beaming as she straightens out the collar of his shirt.
You swallow, breath hitching as you do.
Oh.
You turn, reaching for the car keys in your pocket but the shakiness of your hands causes you to drop them, the clang echoing through the empty court yard. You cringe as you kneel down to pick them up, avoiding the looks you know Janie and Bradley are probably giving you.
You pray that they’ll just let you leave as you turn back towards the entrance of the school but the sound of someone jogging after you ruins that dream.
Someone tugs on your arm, turning you to face them and you catch Bradley’s hazel eyes swimming with concern before you look away from him again.
“Hey, is everything okay? What are you doing here? Did you hear something from your Dad?”
You shrug. “I drove here. Everything’s fine, I- I just- just- thought maybe you could use a ride and we could go get food or something.”
Bradley’s shoulders fall. “Oh shit, I - I wish I could but Janie and I are gonna go to her house and study for that AP Euro test tomorrow. She’s gonna give me a ride back.”
You swallow. “Oh, okay. No, that’s okay. I just thought-” You wave a hand, trying to swallow down the tears. “Doesn’t matter what I thought. Um, have fun, okay?”
He nods uncertainly, eyes searching yours.
Don’t fuck this up for him.
You suck in a breath, taking a step back, causing Bradley’s arm to fall from your shoulder.
“See you in home room tomorrow.”
You turn, walking back to Slider’s truck, sliding in the front seat as you take a deep breath, trying not to cry as you drive out of the parking lot.
Why did you expect Bradley to be impressed? Why did you expect him to think it was cool you’d driven your Uncle’s truck here? After all, he’d had his license for months, so had all his friends.
You’d always been the younger girl, the one who had always been around, the little sister figure who was always going to be there. He’d never see you as anything more than his favorite uncle’s daughter.
Hell, he probably didn't even see you as his friend, just someone who was there.
Your eyes itch with the familiar sting of tears as you open the front door, dropping the keys on the entryway table.
“Hey, I thought you and Bradley were going to go out after rehearsal?” Slider asks, wiping his hands on a dish towel.
“He’s studying with Janie.”
Slider says something you don’t hear as you turn, trudging up the stairs.
You slip inside your bedroom, laying on the top of the duvet, feeling silly as the tears begin to slide down your cheeks.
Why would Bradley ever like someone like you?
Janie was the perfect girl.
Her parents were still married, she had an older brother who was a doctor and an older sister who worked as engineer. She was smart and intelligent, kind and pure, full of happiness and light.
She’d be so good for someone like Bradley, who was all those things and more.
You could see it now, the children they’d have, the family they’d build together. Their kids would probably have Janie’s freckles, Bradley’s curls.
They’d be happy together.
You wipe your hand at your cheek, fruitlessly trying to rid yourself of your tears, as you wished you were anybody else.
There was a soft knock on your door, the door creaking open. Sienna peaks her head in, before sighing and shutting the door quietly behind her.
“What’re you doing here?” You croak.
“I needed help with my math homework, but Ron mentioned you were pretty upset, so-”
You sigh, rolling over to face her as she sits on the bed next to you.
“I dunno, it’s stupid.” You mutter, hands fiddling with the small bear plushie your Dad had won you at the fair this summer.
“I cry over stupid things all the time.” She says, nudging your shoulder. “C’mon, you can tell me about it.”
“I went to go pick Bradley up from rehearsal since his car is in the shop, and I don’t know- it was the first time I’ve actually driven somewhere without my parents since getting my learner’s permit. And I was gonna go ask him to get ice cream or something like we always do- and I- I walked in on him sort of having a moment with Janie and I don’t know Sienna- I guess I’m just realizing that I’ll always be second best.”
The girl who was always younger, hitting milestones later than everyone else, the girl who was always around, the one everyone took for granted.
Sienna sighs. “I wish- I wish you didn’t feel like that. You deserve so much more than that.”
You shrug, setting the bear on the bed next to you as you roll back away from her. She stays next to you on the bed, the slowly setting sun reflecting in the glass.
“I mean for what it’s worth, I know Ben has a crush on you.”
“What?” You ask, voice raw and watery from crying.
“Not that you have to do anything with that information, he just- he does. If Bradley isn’t willing to get his shit together enough to see what’s right in front of him, well, there are other guys who will.”
“Sienna…” You mumble. “I can’t even process this information right now.” You say, a headache beginning to form.
“Okay.” She says softly. “Want to go get ice cream with me instead?”
“Not really.”
“Okay.” She says. “I’ll just sit with you then.” She lays down on the bed next to you.
There she stays, for the rest of the evening.
-
“Hey, uh-” Janie says, sliding into the seat next to you in your homeroom.
“Yeah?”
“Well, our other assistant director quit recently, and while I’m pretty confident I can handle the show on my own, we really need someone to take notes during rehearsals, and Bradley suggested you since you’re already familiar with the show since you’ve been running lines with him and stuff.”
Bradley thought of you? And suggested you to Janie?
“Well, I- yeah, okay.” You say, blinking at the girl. A smile lights up her face as she stands up from the desk.
“Perfect! See you this afternoon!”
Sienna frowns, appearing to your left as she sits down next to Bradley at the front of the classroom.
“What’d she want?”
“I guess I’m helping out with the play now?” you ask, watching as Bradley looks back at you.
“What?” Sienna hisses. “Literally two nights ago, you were crying your eyes out over him-”
“Hey Sienna.” You say, turning to her. “Don’t question it, okay? Let me have this.”
She narrows her eyes, slowly sinking into the desk next to you.
“If you say so.”
-
“What are you doing?”
Bradley turns from where he’s dancing through the kitchen, the spoon being used as a microphone.
Frankie Avalon’s voice floats through the speaker in the corner, the tune of Beauty School Dropout accompanying him.
You raise an eyebrow at him, trying not to let your grin take over as the boy begins to sing again, swaying his hips as he follows through the steps they’ve been learning in rehearsal. There’s pancake batter dripping off the spoon and to his arm and pajama pants, even as he holds out his other arm for you.
You bite your lip, barely hiding your amusement at this moment.
Beauty school dropout, hanging around the corner store
You can’t resist, taking the brunette's arm as he gracefully turns, setting the spoon on the kitchen counter, taking your other hand to move in time with you.
Now your bangs are curled, your lashes whirled, but still the world is cruel, wipe off that angel face and go back to high school
Bradley croons through the rest of the song and as Frankie Avalon’s voice tapers off, you hear someone sigh.
You both turn, Bradley not letting go of your hands. Carole stands there with her hands on her hips, a soft smile on her face.
“This damn musical is taking over our lives.”
The song starts over and Bradley reaches out for her hands, inviting her to come dance with you as he begins singing again.
-
“Andrew, where’s Bradley?” You ask with a sigh, pulling yourself from the car.
The boy, playing Kenickie, looks over at you from where he’s walking to his car.
“Still inside, I think. Ms. Scott wanted to run a few of the Sandy and Danny scenes one more time after rehearsal today.”
“Thanks Andrew.” You call, heading towards the theater.
“Good to see you mini Mitchell.” He calls as you slide through the doors.
True to his word, Bradley is just exiting the stage door and he grins when he sees you.
Unfortunately, you’re at a loss for words, blinking dumbly at the sight of your best friend.
Today had been the first day of full dress rehearsal, the show quickly approaching. Which meant Bradley was fully Danny Zuko, down to the slicked back hair and fake cigarette hanging from his mouth.
“Hey kid! Pretty cool costume, right?” He flicks out the switchblade hair comb the props team had gotten for him, striking a pose and slicking back his slightly mussed hair.
You’re pretty sure you go weak in the knees.
“Uh-” Your voice comes out all scratchy and you have to clear your throat a few times, trying to formulate words. “It looks great, B.”
He sends a cheeky grin. “I know.”
-
Frankie Vialli’s Grease floats through the auditorium as the lights go down, your Dad nudging you as you settle in your seats for the show to start.
The song tapers off as the curtain rises, lights illuminating the stage as Lacy and Nicole, the girl playing Frenchy, walk out on stage.
You wait with bated breath for Summer Nights, knowing how worried Bradley had been about slipping on those damn bleachers.
And of course, his performance is impeccable.
Watching Bradley on stage is mesmerizing, magical almost.
You don’t even realize intermission is upon you until the curtain rises and you blink, finally letting in a breath as you relax your shoulders.
“Are you gonna have to come again tomorrow night when Ice and Sarah come to see Bradley?” Slider says with a nudge as he shares a knowing look with Carole.
“Hi Mr. Mitchell.” Sienna says from behind you, your Dad turning and offering her a smile
“Nice flowers.” Madison snickers, nodding to the flowers at your feet.
“We went to three stores to get those.” Your Dad responds.
“Three? You’re really trying hard here-”
The glare you send Matt is enough to silence him as he shrinks back in his seat.
-
“Mav!” Bradley shouts across the patio, racing for your Dad, barreling into him before your Dad has barely turned. Your Dad returns the tight hug as your hands become sweaty, turning the crinkling paper in your hand. “Didn’t think you’d make it.”
“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, Baby Goose.” Mav says, giving him a bright smile. “You looked so good up there.”
“Thanks Mav.” Bradley is practically beaming as he turns to face the rest of you. “Thanks for coming.” His eyes catch on the flowers in your hand, growing wider. “Did you get me flowers?”
You glance down at them.
“You know tulips means pure and deep love, right?” Sienna whispers in your ear over the back of the seats. Your cheeks grow hot as you gingerly set them down on the floor.
“Sienna-“
“And red means lust-“
“Sienna, I’ll hit you.”
“Yeah, I- uh, I know it’s tradition to get flowers for opening night and I uh-“ If Bradley was beaming before, he’s glowing now, taking the flowers from your hands.
“Thank you so much.” He says warmly.
Before you can process what happens next, he ducks down and presses a kiss to your cheek. “Thank you. I wouldn’t have been able to do any of it without you.”
You can feel the burning warmth take over as you shrug. “Oh, it was- no- no big deal.”
“Bradley!” April calls, pulling him away with a. smile as you turn back to your Dad. He grins at you.
“What?”
He shakes his head. “Nothing. Is Carole still in the bathroom? I should go find her.”
“Hey.” Someone’s hand lands on your shoulder as you look up. “Do you want to get out of here and go get ice cream?” Ben asks. “I can drive you home. Got my Dad’s truck for the night.”
“Um-“ Your eyes slide over his shoulder to see your Dad talking to Slider and Carole, Bradley having disappeared back into the crowd. Part of you wants to stay, to see if Bradley will join the four of you for dinner. The other part of you remembers what Sienna said, about him having a crush on you.
“Let me go ask my Dad, okay?”
“I’ll come with. I know he won’t let you climb into a car with just anyone. He just got back, right?”
You nod as you squeeze through the crowd. “This morning. Dad.” You call, catching his attention. He turns his head. “This is Ben.”
Ben holds out his hand. “Benjamin Waters sir. It’s really good to meet you.” Your Dad shakes his hand with a raised eyebrow.
“Can we- well, can I go get ice cream? With Ben?”
“I’ll drive her home.” Ben offers, with a smile.
Slider does a terrible job of hiding his surprise, coughing into his fist and he shoots your Dad a look.
“Um, as long as you go find Bradley and let him know you’re leaving, yeah, I guess I don’t really have a problem with it.”
If you thought Bradley was happy, Ben is elated.
You heave a sigh, eyes scanning the crowd for April. She catches your eye, squeezing her way through the people, her brother Alex in tow.
“Where’d Bradley go?”
“Around the building. I think he went to go get changed.”
You nod, following where she pointed you as Ben follows you like a lost puppy dog.
Finally, you spot him, still in costume sans leather jacket, leaned up against the building next to the stage door.
And then-
and then there’s Janie, who is pressing her hands into his shirt as she kisses Bradley. Bradley cups Janie’s cheek, deepening the kiss.
You turn away, swallowing around the lump in your throat.
If Bradley isn’t willing to get his shit together enough to see what’s right in front of him, well, there are other guys who will.
You look over at Ben, who’s already watching you.
Is this- is this what it would always be with Bradley? Always one step behind, always too slow?
Never enough, never enough, never enough-
“Do you just wanna go?” Ben whispers as you glance back at Bradley.
Maybe Ben really was the best you’d ever get. You certainly were never gonna get anything from Bradley.
Bradley breaks away, smiling at Janie as he moves some of her hair back.
And then his eyes latch on to you, growing wide. Janie turns her head, catching sight of you and Ben. Janie turns as well, stepping back from him and giving you a little finger wave. You’re just far enough away that you can’t hear what she says to him before grabbing the front of his shirt, pulling him down to place a kiss on his cheek. You can see the imprint of her red lipstick on his cheek as she gives you and Ben one last look before slipping back inside the side door.
Ben clears his throat, taking a few steps back as Bradley walks over to you.
“Hey, I- uh, didn’t mean to interrupt- that.” You say, glancing back over at where Janie and Bradley had been standing.
“No-, you- no, it’s okay. Hey, we’re all gonna go out to eat, the whole cast and crew, all of us. You should come with, ‘specially cause you helped out so much-”
“Bradley-”
“-Or does Mav want to go out to eat? I can-”
“Bradley, Ben and I are gonna go get ice cream. I just- uh, though you should know.”
Bradley deflates a little. “Oh. Well, uh-” He shoves his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I- uh, tell Ben that if he tries anything, he’s got me to worry about it. You hear that Ben?” he calls. “You take good care of her.” Ben salutes, as Bradley sets his hand on your shoulder, nudging you towards him. “Go. Have fun.”
You swallow, nodding as you walk back to Ben. Ben takes your hand as you give Bradley one last look. He gives a soft smile, holding his hand up before you turn back around, listening to Ben chatter.
#bradley bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley bradshaw fic#top gun: maverick fic#top gun: maverick#same mistakes#like father like daughter
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It’s Ridiculous, But I’ll Always Love You
A Lloyd Hansen Love Story
~~
Part 1
~~
Okay, this is too make up for my last Lloyd Hansen story (I’m really sorry y’all). This popped into my head while I was working on my Ransom story, and it wouldn’t leave me alone, so now I’m working on Lloyd and Ransom stories at the same time, because I clearly hate myself. Now, I will give y’all a heads up and let you know that there will be a few parts that might make ya cry, but it’s not like the last Lloyd story, I PROMISE.
Thank you to @fuckingbye for an amazing mood board (as always). You’re perfect and I love you.
Lets get to it.
Word Count: 38,582 (me and my fucking novels)
Warnings: SMUT (Minors DNI OR I WILL SNITCH), 18+ ONLY, Fluff, Swearing, Drinking, Smoking, Cheating, Angst, Toxic Relationship, Minor Abuse, Lloyd Hansen (because he’s a walking warning), Violence Gun Violence (it’s Lloyd), Slight Family Drama, Depression, Daddy Kink, Degrading Kink, Crying, Arguing, Child Trauma...I think that’s everything?
Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter: I’m Sorry That You’re Jaded
I do not give consent/permission for my works/stories to be posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior, this is for entertainment purposes only.
~~
“Mom!” your son, Travis, yells as he runs towards you, Lloyd following behind him at a leisurely pace; a slight scowl on his face.
Of course.
“How was your week with dad?!” you ask enthusiastically, laughing as you almost fall over from the excitement of embrace.
“It was great! We went to a football game, the park, the aquarium, and so much other stuff!”
“Did you get your schoolwork done?” you ask with a chuckle as you cock an eyebrow at your ex-husband.
“Yup! Dad helped me with math before we left for the football game! He told me he can see me being a quarterback one day!”
“I bet he did,” you chuckle, “go inside and get ready for dinner. Stuffed shells and salad tonight.”
“Hell yeah!” he yells before letting go of you and running into the house as Lloyd chuckles.
“Watch your mouth!” you yell after him, before getting up, “Lloyd.”
“Hey Little Hummingbird,” he smirks.
“We’ve been divorced for four years. You can’t think of another nickname?”
“It’s the only affectionate one I have for you at the moment. The other ones are too...dirty.”
“Don’t be a dick. What’s wrong? You look annoyed.”
“Sometimes, I forget how much he’s like you.”
“Says the one who I’m sure encourages him to say ‘hell yes’. What happened? Am I grounding him?”
“No, he didn’t do anything wrong. Got into a little disagreement at the park, and like his Mother, he showed me why I was wrong.”
“Well, in that case, he’s perfect and I’m getting him whatever he wants tomorrow,” you smile as Lloyd just shakes his head and chuckles. “Are you staying for dinner?”
“Ya know, I could stay every night if you’d just take me back.”
“It would be so easy, if you hadn’t cheated.”
“A minor infraction,” he scowls and you roll your eyes.
“Are you staying or not?”
“Can’t. I have a mission to pack for.”
“Lloyd.”
“Don’t start. Denny called while I was on my way over-”
“You know I’m looking at houses next weekend! You agreed!”
“It’s work, Hummingbird.”
“Seems like you’re loyal to everyone except me,” you bite, and by the look in his eyes, you know you’ve hit a sore spot.
“You know I’m sorry-”
“Am I supposed to feel special because I’m the only person you’ve ever sorry to in your life?”
“I don’t wanna argue with you, Y/N. I’ll make it up to you. Hell, I’ll buy whatever house you decide on.”
“I don’t want you buying me shit.”
“Still the most gorgeous and most stubborn woman I’ve ever known. Can you just agree? I’ve gotta leave in two hours.”
“The universe just loves to work in your favor, doesn’t it?”
“Y/N-”
“I’m obviously gonna take him, Lloyd. I’m not leaving our son with some stranger. Especially with the line of work you’re in.”
“I’ll make it up to you.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“Don’t get upset, my pretty little flower,” he coos as he wraps his arms around your waist.
You hate how much you’re always reminded of how much you miss his touch whenever he makes any type of contact with him. Asshole.
“Let me go, Lloyd. I swear to God, I’ll knee you in the nuts.”
“We both know how much I love it when you try to get rough with me.”
“Lloyd-”
“I’m not trying to fuck you over, Y/N. It’s just work. I will make this up to both you and Travis. I promise, okay?”
“Yeah fine, whatever,” you sigh. “Travis,” you call as you reluctantly break out of Lloyd’s hold, “come and say so long to your dad! He’s gotta go away for a bit!”
“What?! No!” your son yells as he makes his way back to the doorway. “You promised me-”
“It’s work, Trav. I have to go.”
“What the-”
“Watch your mouth,” you warn. “Don’t give your Dad a hard time. He said he’ll make it up to you and he always does. Now, give him a hug. He has to leave in a few hours.”
Travis lets out a heavy sigh but hugs his Lloyd tight nonetheless, “I hate your job.”
“Sometimes, I do too. We’ll do something when I get back, okay?”
“Yeah,” he mumbles solemnly before letting go and running back inside.
“I can’t seem to get it right with him,” Lloyd sighs.
“He’ll forgive you. He always forgives you.”
“And you?”
“I’ll get over it. I always do.”
“I love you.”
“That’s nice,” you mutter, running a frustrated hand through hand through your hair, because that little statement still means more to you than it should.
“Saying it back won’t make us married again, Hummingbird.”
“Why say something that isn’t true?”
“Why lie to the world’s best liar?” he smirks.
“Just go. I don’t have the energy today and you have to go.”
“I’ll call you when I’m on my way back.”
“Sounds fair enough...Lloyd, have you pissed anyone off lately?” you question as an uneasy feeling starts making its way into your stomach.
“According to you, I piss everyone off all the time.”
“I mean more than usual.”
“Nothing you need to worry about.”
“Lloyd.”
“What’s wrong, little Hummingbird?”
“Something feels...off. I don’t know. I just don’t have a good feeling.”
“Everything is fine. No one knows where you live, no one would dare dream of attacking you to get to me, and you have protection even when I’m not here. You’re fine.”
“Something doesn’t feel right. Be careful, okay?”
“Seems my sweet little butterfly still cares.”
“I fucking mean it, Lloyd. Be careful.”
“I’ll be fine, Hummingbird,” he reassures you before kissing your cheek then turning to walk away.
Something you always tell him you hate, but you and him both know it’s bullshit.
“Do you still have that pistol I gave you?” he asks, turning around and facing you once he reaches the bottom step.
“I always keep it on me.”
“If you’re really feeling that paranoid, make sure it’s loaded and always on you. I’ll check in after I land, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you too, Lloyd.”
You watch him walk back to his car and look around for anything suspicious. After being with Lloyd for forever, you’ve learned that every and anything is a possible threat. When you don’t see anything out of the ordinary, you close the door and make your way into the dining room.
“Who’s up for pasta night?!”
**
Technically, you’ve known Lloyd since your Freshman year of High School. He was on the football team and you were in the book club.
Needless to say, you two never interacted.
Sure, you’d heard of him (him being the star quarterback and all), but you two were in two completely different social groups. He made the speeches for the assembly’s to get everyone about football season, and you made sure to have your headphones on when he did. He dated (or fucked) all the cheerleaders, and you took pictures for the school paper. He was voted Homecoming king, and you and your friends made fun of the people who were obsessed with that kind of thing. He was prom king, and you didn’t go to prom.
You two just led completely different lives.
Then came college.
“Thought I knew you from somewhere,” he said, smug grin on his face as he approached your desk after Psych class. “We went to High School together.”
“May I help you with something, Hansen?” you asked, very obviously annoyed as you packed your backpack.
“Don’t get all sour on me and I haven’t even done anything yet,” he taunted with a chuckle.
“Lloyd Hansen: world’s biggest asshole, star quarterback, campus’ biggest womanizer, straight A dickhead...how may I help you, Hansen?” you sighed as you stood up and slung your backpack over your shoulder. “How may I help you?”
“I thought we’d have lunch together.”
“Now, why would that big brain of yours come to that conclusion?”
“Because I know how much you don’t want to,” he grinned at you.
And that’s how it started.
It didn’t matter how or how often you said no, Lloyd wouldn’t give up. You could conclude that the chase is what drew him in. Every woman on campus (even the fucking teachers) threw themselves at him.
And then there was you.
All you wanted was to stay clear of him because, if anything, Harvard made him worse than he was in High School. He was more arrogant, more annoying, way more of a dickhead, and more of a womanizer. While everyone else flocked in his direction, you made sure to stay as much out of his line of site as possible, which only made him want you more.
Then your Junior year came.
“Y/N, we never get you out of your dorm! Now, we finally get you to come to a party, and you’re not even gonna drink?!” your best friend, Tina, pouted as she tried to make herself heard over the music.
“I don’t want to sleep all day tomorrow, and-”
“Y/N, it’s a party!” Tina laughed. “Just have a drink!”
“Tina-”
“You’re a straight A student! One drink isn’t gonna hurt!”
Well, soon enough, one drink turned into one too many
“How’d they get the Virgin Mary to leave her dorm?” Lloyd laughed as he stumbled a little, approaching you with his red Solo cup in hand.
“Leave me alone, Hansen,” you slurred as you leaned against the counter to stay upright.
“Well, the poet-”
“Lloyd, I am not like every other girl here. I’m not impressed with all the shit you can quote from dead old guys. Go...go away.”
“Let me impress you with something else then,” he smirked.
To this day, you still blame the alcohol for the reason you gave in to him at all. You were both drunk, so he wasn’t even all that charming.
“Lloyd,” you moaned as he laid you down on what you can only assume was his bed.
From the look of the room, you had a hard time imagining that it could have been anyone else’s room.
“Such a dirty little hummingbird, aren’t you? Letting me eat your pussy in the kitchen where anyone could see,” he hummed as he ripped your dress off.
What an asshole.
“Please!” you whimpered as he took his shirt off.
“Felt so good, didn’t it?”
“Lloyd, I fucking swear-”
“Jesus, a needy little whore, huh?”
“Then satisfy me!”
“Ask nicely,” he growled before slapping you.
It’s painfully annoying how much he knew what you needed. Even before you did.
“Lloyd-”
“Ask nicely,” he warned again before he slapped you harder.
“Please!”
“Please who?”
“Please, Lloyd!”
“Who?” he growled before slapped you again.
“Please daddy! Please!”
“There’s a good girl,” he smirked before he crashed his lips into yours, as you both fell back on the bed.
You’d always had rules about hooking up, and one of them was them was that you never kissed. For as much as you wanted to push Lloyd off, it felt so fucking good to get kissed with so much passion.
You’d never been kissed so good in your life.
“You want daddy to destroy this pussy, little Hummingbird?” he husked as you two broke apart.
“Please,” you whimpered as you clawed at his chest.
“What will give me in return, hmm?”
“Anything you want,” you promised him.
God, how did he manage to turn you into the biggest idiot in such a short amount of time?
You and Lloyd kept each other up all night, pleasuring and torturing each other in all the ways you could think of, before finally bowing out at 2am. You were usually smart enough to leave after all was said and done, but Lloyd wore you out and he wasn’t kicking you out. You don’t even remember falling asleep, you just remember him letting you rest your head on his chest.
When you woke up the next morning, he was still fast asleep, so you grabbed a pair of his sweats and his crew neck, and quietly slipped out. It really didn’t mean anything to you that you let him eat you out on some dirty kitchen counter top at a party, because isn’t that what college is for? Being crazy and stupid? However, the attention you received after started to annoy the shit out of you.
“Okay so, if you would have told me that alcohol makes you that wild, I wouldn’t have encouraged you to drink so much,” Tina laughed as she caught up to you as you were leaving your English class.
“It was just sex. It’s not like I injected myself with heroine or did a line of blow off of someone’s ass crack. I let Lloyd Hansen eat me out during a party.” “Exactly!” she laughed, “Lloyd Hansen-”
“He’s not God.”
“Around here he is!”
“Only because you all make it so.”
“Isn’t that his crew neck?”
“It’s comfortable and I overslept.”
“When are you seeing him again?”
“Never?”
“Y/N-”
“It was sex, not some lifelong commitment. He fucks whoever and whatever he wants all the time. I’m not anything special to him.”
“He let you stay over.”
“Yeah? So?”
“Lloyd never lets anyone stay over. If he does, he wakes up early enough to kick them out in the morning.”
“I left-”
“Denny said he’s not happy about that. He expected you to be there.”
“That was a dumb thing to expect.”
“He likes you, babe,” she laughed as you two continued your trip to the library.
“Tina, he’s the same piece of shit hes always been. The only difference is that I got drunk enough to let him get his hands on me.”
“You don’t even want to consider the idea of one date with him?”
“I don’t want to consider the idea of anything with him.”
Too bad Lloyd had other plans.
“It’s been two weeks and you haven’t come to see me,” Lloyd growled quietly as he aggressively took a seat across from you in the library.
“Well, look who it is,” you mumbled, not even bothering to look up from your book, “I’m amazed you could find the library, honestly.”
“What the fuck is your issue?”
“Currently? You distracting from my work.”
“We fucked-”
“Exactly. We fucked. There was no exclusive agreement made that I’d come and see you, fuck you on the regular, or that we’re dating. I know that you know that more than anyone else. It was a college party, we fucked, and now it’s over. Sorry I didn’t leave you a goody bag,” you scoffed as you started to take notes.
“You didn’t seem to hate me so much when my face was buried between your legs.”
“The fact that I even let you touch me lets you know just how fucking drunk I was. You’ve been trying to get into my pants since Freshman year, and it took you until I got shit faced at a party to fuck me? It wasn’t anything special.”
“Why isn’t it?”
“Why shouldn’t it be?”
“Because I’m your Huckleberry,” he smirked.
It’s sad and pathetic that, that’s all it took for him to win you over. A cheesy line from what you would come to find is his favorite movie. It took a bit of back and forth, but Lloyd Hansen eventually talked you into going on a date with him. You could tell by how hard he was having to work, he was getting annoyed.
However, one date turned into two. Two turned into study sessions and late night phone calls. Soon enough, you were the only woman on campus holding all of Lloyd’s attention, and pissed off every other woman. You found yourself giving a damn about football and showing up to almost every game (which he made a big show of every single fucking time), and he stayed up with you during the nights when you studied entirely too much over the things you already knew for an exam.
Eventually, you two became boyfriend and girlfriend.
“What would think of me with a mustache?” he asked one night while you were studying in his dorm.
“Stop watching so much damn ‘Tombstone’,” you laughed.
“Shut up. What would you think?”
“You mean, would I still fuck you? I don’t know, Huckleberry. I guess you’ll have to grow it out and we’ll see,” you shrugged. “If it stops you from letting me ride your face, then I don’t want it.”
“Now why would I ever tell you to stop doing that?” he smirked as he pushed your books off the bed and you burst out laughing. “Exams are over, aren’t they?”
“Lloyd-”
“You kept daddy waiting for so long,” he continues as he took your shirt off, “and now you bring up riding my face?”
“Daddy,” you moaned as you lost all resolve.
“Hummingbird, I’ve been patient with you. It’s time for my reward.”
“Fuck,” you sighed as he ripped off your panties.
“Am I still your Huckleberry?”
“Always, daddy!” you moaned.
“There’s my good girl. My perfect little Hummingbird,” he smirked before he dove between your legs and started fucking you with his tongue.
In a short amount of time, you two had become inseparable. It’s not like you ever meant to fall in love with him; he was an asshole, he was rude, he was unforgiving, he was prideful, he was boastful, and he was arrogant.
Arrogant as fuck.
But with you? He was different. You could almost say that he was a gentleman.
It didn’t take long for you to see that he was a bit unhinged, especially when he was playing football, but somehow you found a way to make an excuse for it.
Then, everything changed.
“So, I’ve been talking with Denny-”
“That’s never a good thing,” you sighed, as laid down on Lloyd’s bed.
“I would be a good fit for the CIA-”
“HA! No you wouldn’t!”
“Fuck you!”
“Lloyd, you barely listen to your football coach. You think you can handle training for the CIA?”
“I’m not that bad.”
“Lloyd, just stick with-”
“I took a test.”
“So, we’re keeping secrets now? That’s great,” you scoffed as you got up. “I didn’t keep a secret, Hummingbird,” he scowled.
“Don’t fucking get cute with me! You didn’t tell me about it-”
“Cause you’d try and talk me out of it!”
“We had a plan, Hansen!”
“We can still stick to it-”
“We quite literally can’t if you’re joining the fucking CIA!” you huffed as you put your shoes on.
“You’re not fucking mad at Tina-”
“I’m not in love with her or thinking about marrying her!”
“Oh, don’t be dramatic, Hummingbird,” he mumbled.
“I’m going back to my room-”
“No you’re not,” he growled, grabbing your arm and pushing you against the door. “We’re talking about this!”
“Oh, now you wanna talk about it? Too fucking bad!”
“Y/N, don’t make a big fucking deal out of-”
“You lied to me! You don’t get to be annoyed-”
“I didn’t fucking lie!”
“You weren’t fucking upfront about it! I’m going back-”
“No you’re not!”
Instead of deciding to keep the back and forth going, you opted to knee him in the nuts.
It’s truly cute how thought that was going to get you out of his room.
“There you go, being a little bitch!” he groaned, his on you still tight as he thew you onto the bed.
“I’m leaving!”
“Hummingbird, it’s really a shame that you haven’t figured out how this works,” he chuckled darkly as he took off his shirt and threw it across the room, “you don’t fucking leave until I say so, and I say that we’re not done talking about this.”
It’s not lost on you that and you and Lloyd were never in really a normal or healthy relationship. You two got off on arguing and getting physical with one another. In fact, on more than one occasion, his housemates had to check to make sure you two weren’t killing each other.
You were sure that Lloyd would never actually physically hurt you. If anything, he let you hit him a lot more than he ever put his hands on you. He knew he was an asshole and 90% of the times when you slapped him, he knew he deserved it. Occasionally, he’d get rough and throw you against the wall or grip you by your neck, but that’s how you two usually ended up in bed anyway.
Why the hell should you give a damn?
That’s also why Lloyd loved you so much though.
You weren’t afraid of him, you didn’t take his shit, you put him in his place, and you were just as sexual and wild as him. He’d met his match. He couldn’t control you (something he both loved and hated), you were witty as hell, you were smart as whip, and you constantly called him on his shit.
In some ways, you two were a match made in hell; so to Lloyd, it meant you two were a match made in heaven.
You two stayed up arguing and fucking for hours that night, but at the end of it all, his mind was made up and you weren’t going to breakup with him. Somehow, you’d become in love enough that putting up with his shit didn’t seem like too much, though Tina would beg to differ.
You two just understood each other. There wasn’t anything necessarily wrong with Lloyd. His parents (while snobbish and infuriating at times) loved the hell out of him, supported him in everything he did, and his Mother made sure to always tell him how proud she was. Whatever Lloyd decided to do, he was good at. No matter how hard or challenging, he excelled better than anyone else. If he wasn’t going to be number one, he didn’t see the point in doing it. It also helped that his parents were loaded and he had every opportunity in the world lined up for him.
No, Lloyd didn’t have some terrible backstory as to why he turned out a little unhinged. He just did and he was good at hiding it from everyone. Everyone except you.
As for you? You just were what you were. No, you definitely didn’t hate people as much as Lloyd did, but you did your best to stay away as much as possible. Your parents had gotten by, by living paycheck to paycheck, but taught you the value of being kind and patient with others, but to never be a fool. They loved to throw little parties and had lots of friends. The day you got your acceptance letter from Harvard (on a full scholarship), they partied all weekend with their friends. There was no short supply of love in your house, and you (for the most part) cherished that. Maybe that’s why you were able to handle Lloyd so well.
You both could tell that neither of your parents were expecting the two of you to be together, and it wasn’t hard to see that they didn’t really like each other, but they saw how happy the two of you were. So, when Lloyd proposed after graduation, both of your parents worked together to throw you the very best engagement party. Yes, there was back and forth about where it should be held, how much money was spent, but it was overall gorgeous and you two were happy.
For the longest time, you two were so happy.
It’s not like either of you didn’t know that Lloyd was sociopath, but you always handled it well, and that always made him feel normal. When he got kicked out of the CIA, you weren’t surprised in the slightest, but you never rubbed it in his face. When he was assigned to the private sector, you weren’t necessarily happy about it, but accepted it with as much grace and dignity as you could.
“It’s a job!” Lloyd yelled as he followed you into the kitchen of the house his parents bought for the both of you as a wedding present.
“I don’t wanna talk about it anymore, Huckleberry,” you sighed, grabbing a bottle of Jack Daniels off the shelf, as well as the cigarettes you kept beside it.
“Hummingbird-”
“Lloyd, I love you. I feel like after all the time, it’s very obvious just how deeply and truly I do. However, this? I need to process it.”
“What’s wrong with it?!”
“Let’s not do this right now.”
“No, tell me!”
“Lloyd, you’re fucking insane! You didn’t get kicked out because you’re too soft! You got kicked out because you don’t know when to fucking stop! Now, you have your own private fucking sector that you’re in charges of, and it’s supposed to be okay?! All of this is supposed to be a good idea?! We’re fucking married! Besides the fact that I absolutely hate this for you, what about me?!”
“You know there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do-”
“Lloyd, you have this job because the CIA can’t do the jobs you’ll get assigned! Your enemies are gonna be way worse!”
“I will always keep you safe, no matter what! You know that!”
“Lloyd-”
“This is good! It’s good for us! I can provide-”
“I have my own fucking job that pays me well enough!”
“Hummingbird, I’m good at this. Really fucking good at this. It’s what I’m meant to do.”
“I don’t want to talk about it anymore, Lloyd. If this is what you’re gonna do, it’s what you’re gonna do. You always do what you wanna do, so why should that change now, right?”
“Hummingbird-”
“I don’t feel like talking about this anymore,” you shrugged, grabbing a lighter, along with your drink and cigarette, before you made your way out on to the patio.
That was one of the roughest weeks you two had, had in a while. He wasn’t backing down and you weren’t changing your position.
Maybe that’s when it all went wrong.
It was the first time you weren’t giving Lloyd all of your support, and it hurt him more than he wanted to admit, because Lloyd was prideful before anything else. Nonetheless, you two were just as in love as you two had always been, and a year later, you were pregnant. Initially, you were both over the moon, but the reality of his job started to set in, and soon enough it just became another argument for you two to have. He wasn’t going to quit and and you weren’t going to change your mind about wanting him to do something else.
Nine months later, you welcomed Travis Michael Hansen into the world, and you both fell in love with him instantly. You’d both agreed on the name Charles (after your grandfather because Lloyd wanted to name him Doc and...no), but while you were sleeping, he decided he didn’t like like it and told them Travis. Too tired from being tired when you woke up, you let him win that round.
Lloyd shocked you both with how good of Father he was. He was very hands on, he got up to take care of Travis when he would scream at three in morning and you were too tired, he read to him, and he even took time off of work when he thought that Travis was close to taking his first steps because he didn’t want to miss a thing.
For all of the faults that he had, Lloyd was a good Dad.
Years went by and for just as good as they got, they also got that much worse.
“Lloyd, I can’t fucking do this by myself! I need you here!”
“Don’t fucking start, Hummingbird. I’m working-”
“I’m working! I’m working, raising our son, making sure that everything-”
“I’ve told you over and over again that you can quit!”
“Lloyd, you are not the only person who likes their fucking job! Why should I have to-”
“Because you’re a fucking mom now!”
“You’re a fucking dad!”
“It’s your fucking job-”
“Fuck you, Hansen,” you scoffed, grabbing your glass of wine before you got up, “go straight to hell.”
From then on, the arguments got harsher and the nights got lonelier. Even when he was home, you didn’t sleep in the same bed as him. You weren’t strong enough to deny him what he wanted from you most (which was intimacy), and staying away was the only way to not give in.
Then, one night, he came home from a mission and you could easily tell that everything was about to change.
“What the he is all this?” you asked as you walked into the kitchen, seeing Lloyd seated with two glasses filled with red wine.
“Is he sleeping?” he asked solemnly.
“We’re still at the age where it doesn’t take much for him to want sleep. Having a four year old has it perks,” you smirked as you sat down. “What happened?”
“You know I love you more than anything-”
“Just spit it out. What happened?”
“I cheated,” he sighed.
You drank your entire glass without taking a single breath to stop, before you instantly refilled it.
“Hummingbird, we can work-”
“I want a divorce, Lloyd. Simple as that.”
“We can work this-”
“I told you that would be where I drew the line. That, and I can’t keep fucking do this with you anymore.”
“We can figure this out-”
“We’ve been “figuring this out” since we graduated from college. You’re a selfish bastard-”
“Don’t act like you didn’t play a part in this!”
“Because I won’t open my legs for you, it’s my fault?!”
“You’re not available at all! Not even to talk! You’re constantly punishing me for not doing the things you want and deny me any ounce of affection!”
He had you there.
“This isn’t Harvard. We’re too old to just fuck this away-”
“I have never cheated on you before!”
“But you’ve fucked me over before and I can’t...we both can’t keep hurting each other anymore.”
“We don’t have to do this,” he sighed, his voice cracking as he fought off his tears.
“I can’t keep settling. I can’t keep making excuses for the shit that you do. I’m not another one of your punching bags.”
“You know I love you.”
“It’s clearly not enough,” you laughed humorlessly as you sniffled. “This is just done.”
“Hummingbird, we can make this work.”
“Give me a good reason to.”
“Because I’m your Huckleberry.”
You reached across the table and grabbed his hand while smiling mournfully at him, “no, not anymore.”
You couldn’t even blame him for cheating, honestly. You denied him of yourself in every way possible. You pushed him away, not because you wanted to, but you wanted to him to choose you over everything. When you’re honest with yourself, you purposely pushed him away because you were hurting. You’d been hurting for so long and you’d stop talking about it, which was something Lloyd was big on when it came to you. He didn’t give a fuck about making sure anyone else was happy, but when it came to you? He needed you. He needed to know what you were thinking and how you felt about everything, even if it wasn’t happy.
That was one of the many true perks of being with him; he didn’t care if you had something positive or negative to tell him, he just wanted to know your true and honest thoughts. He needed to know where you were at all time mentally and emotionally. You shut yourself down and, after trying to reach you so many times, it made sense that he just went for comfort elsewhere.
In the end, you told him you wanted nothing (even though he tried to give you the house), got your own house, you both evenly split your time with Travis, and you two were divorced.
As simple, and as painful, as that.
Of course, Lloyd pulled every trick he could, claiming that movers missed a few thing, but you knew he hid them in attempt to see you.
“Where the fuck is it, Lloyd?” you scowled as you made your way inside the house.
“Where’s what?”
“My Mother’s fucking charm bracelet! You know what? I don’t have the time or the patience for this today. Plus. Travis is sleeping and I don’t want to wake him.”
“Maybe we should look for it together,” he suggested with a smirk.
That should’ve been for signal for you to leave, but you missed him just as much as he missed you. You were just as pathetic.
“Fuck,” you sighed, as Lloyd shoved you against his bedroom wall. “We can’t!” you whispered as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Oh yes we can,” he chuckled. “If I recall correctly, we’re very good at it,” he teased as he undid your jeans.
“Lloyd,” you whimpered, not even slightly embarrassed by the moan that leaves your mouth when his hand started teasing your sensitive bundle of nerves.
“My little Hummingbird is so wet for daddy,” he groaned as he got on his knees, “don’t worry, daddy’s gonna make it all better,” he promised before he ripped off your panties and buried his face in between your legs.
Every part of you knew that you should stop, but it felt so good to have him again. Even if it was just for a moment. It had been so long, and you could tell just how much he loved and missed you. By the time he finished you off with his tongue, you told yourself that it would only be one time. You just needed a fix and that would be it.
That was such bullshit.
You couldn’t even pin it all on Lloyd, because the second you two got started, you couldn’t stop. You didn’t want to. It’s not like you filed for a divorce because you stopped loving him, it just wasn’t working anymore. You missed him, you were still deeply in love with him, and he was your soulmate. Lloyd Hansen is no saint, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s the only one for you.
He pulled you apart in every position you loved, your body writhing in pleasure while your head and your heart were at war with each other, and his name leaving your mouth like a silent prayer every time he brought you off. During the final round, he whispered that he loved you, and you said it back without any hesitation. There was no sense in hiding the truth, because you’d always been an open book to Lloyd to begin with.
When you both a fell asleep that night, he held you tight, like he was afraid you’d disappear like the night when you two first slept together.
He was right.
When morning came, you woke up first (because made the mistake of facing the blinds), and his grip had loosened just enough for you to slip out. You knew it would hurt him, but the night shouldn’t have happened in the first damn place. Almost as soon as you stepped foot inside your house, the texts started coming. You truly didn’t want to hurt him, but you knew you two couldn’t get back together. It would be great for a while, then it would all go back to shit.
That’s what always happened.
It was easier in college. You two would argue, things would be said and sometimes things would be thrown, you’d storm out, you’d ignore him for a day or two, he come to your dorm, you two would fuck like rabbits, and everything would go back to how it was.
That’s not the case anymore.
You two have a child and his job was only becoming more and more dangerous. You were tired of feeling like you were the only one doing all the work, and tired of feeling like Lloyd didn’t put you first. Yeah, he loved you, but it wasn’t enough for him to truly put you and Travis first. At some point, you had to draw the line. You weren’t even holding the cheating against him, you just couldn’t keep up the act anymore. All of it was tiring and even if you’d be alone forever, you couldn’t deal with the pain he made you feel. He was your world and you just felt like an awkward painting hanging up in his.
“So we’re back to you sneaking out after-”
“That’s the only time that’s happening again,” you quietly interrupted as Travis ran past you and into the house.
“Hummingbird-”
“It can’t happen anymore, Lloyd. I fucked up, but I’m not strong enough to keep this up with you. We’re divorced.”
“Because you filed for one!”
“Lloyd, I don’t wanna argue. It’s part of the reason I filed for the divorce in first damn place. Just...we had our time together and now it’s done.”
“You still love me-”
“What does that have to do with anything? For as much as we love each other, we can’t seem to get any of this right. It’s not enough for us!”
“Why can’t you just let it go?!”
“Why can’t you quit your job?”
“Hummingbird-”
“Lloyd, we have to stop hurting each other. I know your main setting is asshole and mine is bitch, but we do love each other, and we’ve gone through too much to be cruel to one another. I don’t want to hurt you and you don’t want to hurt me. Besides, we have Travis now and we have to do our best for him.”
He let out a frustrated sigh but didn’t say anything, because as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he knew you had a point. Even if that point broke his heart, and made him angry because he wasn’t getting his way, he did love you too much to ever truly hurt you.
He pulled you close and kissed you so passionately that you went weak in the knees. When you two broke apart, you could see the pain in his eyes, but you could also see the look of defeat. He looked you over before he let you go and walked off.
And that was that.
It’s not like Lloyd hasn’t made advances towards you since, and you almost give in, but it’s been bearable for the most part. His pride and anger does get the better of him sometimes, which causes him to be an asshole and you two to argue. He gets mad that this isn’t just a phase for you and that you’re actually sticking to it, and it causes him to be...well, Lloyd. Sometimes it’s a drunk text about how he had a threesome and he couldn’t figure out why it took him so long to cheat on you, sometimes he’ll call during those threesomes just so you can hear him getting those other women off and how desperate they are for him, and other times it’s just the cold shoulder.
Which is somehow so much worse.
You know he never means it, but it doesn’t make any of it hurt any less, and when Travis is fast asleep, you sit in your kitchen and drink; crying until you’re desperate for sleep. So, in return, you stopped telling him you love him, or showing him any sort of affection at all, really. Maybe it was for the best. The only time you tell him that you love him is when you get the feeling that he’s in serious danger. Which is why you’re so damn worried now.
Yeah, Lloyd checked in when he landed and told you all was fine, but the lack of communication is driving you insane. Yes, it’s always like this for your own safety, but right now, not constantly knowing that he’s safe is making everything worse. The last time you felt like this, he ended up almost getting killed. Some brat named Sierra Six was keeping something from him, a drive or something (you don’t ask questions because you truly don’t care to know), and Denny sent Lloyd to get it back. In the end, Six was killed, Suzanne was killed, and Agent Miranda was killed. Lloyd was in a coma for a while and you stayed by his side every second of every day (which you never told him about) and his and your parents were happy to look after Travis. You think it helped to keep all of their minds occupied, cause it was the first time you saw all of them truly get along with one another.
Now? You don’t know what it is, but something isn’t right. God, you just hope he’s okay.
**
“Mom, dad said these are-”
“Put it back, Travis,” you said as your son tries to hand you some protein drink.
You’re gonna choke Lloyd when he gets back.
“Why don’t you ever want me to bring up Dad?” he scowls as he resumes his job of pushing the cart through the grocery store.
“Because you always bring him up when you want something.”
“That’s the only time I can bring him up, because you hate him.”
“I don’t hate your Father, baby.”
“Well, you sure as shit-”
“TRAVIS!”
“You never like to talk about him,” he mutters.
You’re gonna beat the shit out of Lloyd when he gets back.
Travis is a very good mix of you and Lloyd, and you figure that’s God’s way of playing a joke on you. He has Lloyd’s athleticism, your love of art, Lloyd’s love of movies, your love of music, your patience and big heart, Lloyd’s smart ass mouth, and both of your tempers. On more than one occasion, you and Lloyd have had to make trips to the school because of his temper. Either, he’s calling a teacher a dumbass or shoving other kids into lockers because they annoy him, and it’s very obvious that he’s a product of the both of you.
The kid is only eight.
“It’s complicated, okay? Maybe one day, when you’re older.”
“I’m old enough-”
“You’re 8 with the mouth of a damn sailor,” you mumble. “Do you want any lunch meat for school?”
“Dad said I should keep eating those grilled wraps you make. Something about protein and all that.”
“Your Father would know all about that,” you scoff as you shake your head. “Then we’re all set.”
“Can we watch an action movie tonight?”
“If you watch your mouth for the rest of the day and finish up your homework. One movie.”
“Is Dad gonna be home soon?”
“I hope so,” you sigh as you feel a pair of eyes on you.
You look over to the butchers section and see a man watching you intensely.
Great.
Yeah, you have one of your pistols on you (something you’ve kept on you since Lloyd left), but it doesn’t help that you’re out in public with your son. Maybe you are just being paranoid, but it really doesn’t. After almost losing Lloyd, you’ve learned to always trust your gut.
“What does Dad even do?” Travis asks, completely oblivious to your anxiety and stress.
“He takes care of business for your Godfather when he can’t.”
“Doesn’t Uncle Denny work for the government or something?”
“Something like that. What’s with all the questions?”
“I don’t know. I just miss Dad and I wish he was around more.”
“Me too, kid,” you sigh as you two make your way to the self check-out line.
“Is that why you two aren’t together anymore?”
“You and the questions today!”
“I’m allowed to have them!”
“Don’t worry about it, okay? Just know that we both love and think the world of you, and we’d do anything for you. You’re the center of our universe.”
“Then why is he always gone?” he sighs and your heart breaks.
You’ve been asking yourself the same question for years.
“Hey, how about we watch ‘Tombstone’ tonight?” you smile at him.
“Really?!”
“Just don’t let your Dad know when gets back, deal?”
“Deal,” he laughs.
There’s no way in hell you’re going to let Lloyd know that you cracked and watched his favorite movie to make your son happy. Cocky son of a bitch doesn’t get to rub that in your face.
Checkout is a breeze and you and Travis load everything into your truck without an issue, but you still feel uneasy. Between going to the bank and not seeing your usual teller, feeling as if you’re being followed whenever you go to work, and now the feeling like the new butcher was watching you at the grocery store, you just can’t shake the feeling that a storm is brewing. You don’t know who the fuck Lloyd pissed off, but you wish he’d come back already.
You’d feel a lot safer if he were back.
“Alright, Mary’s gonna be here in a bit-”
“You said we were gonna watch ‘Tombstone’!”
“Calm down!” you quickly interject as give him the key to the house before starting to unload the groceries. “I just have some work to do. You knew she was coming over-”
“You and Dad always have to work!”
“At least I’m here!” you snap before you can control yourself. “Trav, listen, we have a whole weekend together and I promise to spend every minute with you after this. I just need to close on this deal. I promise you, I tried my hardest to get out of it, but my boss doesn’t want the client speaking with anyone else. It should take two hours at most, okay?”
“I hate your boss.”
“That makes two of us, sweetie.”
“You promise it’ll only take two hours?”
“I’ll do my best to keep it down to one. Listen, if you don’t give Mary a hard time, I’ll even let you stay up and watch a horror movie.”
“Really?!”
“Yeah, it’s Friday, why not?” you laugh.
“Thanks Mama, I love you.”
“I love you too. Now, lets get all of this crap in the house, huh?”
“I’ll get the door,” he yells over his shoulder, already running to unlock it.
Now you feel like shit.
It’s not lost on Travis, Lloyd, or you that you always make Travis a priority, but that doesn’t matter right now. He’s upset because he misses his dad, and now you have to work too. You’ve done your absolute best to be there for Travis as much as possible, but they’re some things that are out of control. It makes you feel a little bad for always being so angry with Lloyd about his job, but you also take into account that your job is a lot less dangerous.
However, you both have a child and you’re more than sure that he just wants to feel as normal as the other kids in his class. Their parents aren’t divorced and one of them isn’t flying off on random ass trips most of the time. You know that Travis is reaching an age where he’s gonna want and deserves more answers, but one, you don’t know how to deal with the fact that he’s growing up so fast, and two, you don’t know how to explain all of shit to him.
“Your dad is basically a contract killer, we got a divorce because I felt like he didn’t care about us enough, and we both miss each other terribly but don’t know how hard we try, we can’t seem to work anything out. We love you the most though and that’s what matters most.”
Yeah, for as smart as you may be at 34, you’re not smart enough to figure out that conversation yet, and you’re sure as shit that Lloyd isn’t either.
A rapid tapping on your door pulls you out of your thoughts, and you’re instantly running to the front door.
“I’m so sorry I’m late!” Mary breathes as you usher her in.
“Please don’t feel bad,” you chuckle, closing the door behind her. “Thank you so much for being so flexible. With Lloyd leaving so suddenly, without any warning, I appreciate the help.”
“I would do anything for you and Travis, you know that,” she smiles awkwardly.
You know the poor girl feels like she’s paying penance at times, because she slept with Lloyd during his revenge tour, but you never blamed her. If he could get you, and you absolutely loathed him when he first approached you, you knew he could get anyone.
Lloyd Hansen may be a complete and total dick, but he’s also a charmer when he wants to be.
“The longest all of this should take is two hours, but I’ll do my best to get it done quicker. Travis is starving, so I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to help in the kitchen, but you also have the option to order food. My card is on the kitchen countertop, so get whatever. He usually loves Chinese food, but it’s Friday and he’s his Father’s child, so pizza may be the best...why am I telling you all of this? You’ve watched him long enough that you know everything.”
“I promise, everything will be fine,” she smiles. “Good luck with your deal!”
“Yeah, I’m gonna need it,” you smile at her. “I’m gonna go upstairs now, okay Trav?!” you call from the living area entry way and, almost instantly, Travis is running towards you and wrapping his arms around your waist.
“You sure you can’t just hangout today?”
“I promise to make it up to you as soon as it’s over.”
“I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too, hun,” you tell him sincerely before breaking yourself out of his hold. “I promise, the second I’m all done, I’m all yours,” you smile at him.
With that, you’re rushing upstairs and hoping onto the call just in time.
You gotta take him Disney World or some shit when everything calms down.
For the first thirty minutes, everything is fine and as it should be, then you hear a commotion downstairs, followed by gunshots.
“Are those gunshots I-”
You close the laptop before he can finish and grab your pistol.
You fucking knew something was wrong.
You quickly and quietly make your way to steps before you hear another set of gunshot.
Travis.
“Are you sure she’s his wife?!” one person yells.
“They have the same fucking hair and that’s her card on the countertop! It’s gotta be her!”
“That’s the woman you saw at the bank?!”
“Is that the woman you saw at the grocery store?! If we don’t get this right, Andrew will kill us!”
“It’s gotta be her!”
“You sure we got the kid?!”
“I’m positive! We gotta- ah, shit!” the one guys yells as you run down the steps and you start shooting.
You hit one of them in the arms and the other in the leg, but they’re able to get away. You would be more than happy to go after them, but Travis. He’s all you care about right now.
You make your way into the living area and see Mary dead on the floor; two shots to the chest and one to the head. You have to search for Travis (he’s always been a smart kid), but once you find him, you instantly fall apart.
“Mom-”
“Shh, don’t say any thing,” you cry softly as you cradle him in your arms. “I’m gonna call for help and you’re gonna be fine.”
“It hurts!”
“I know, baby, I know. Just focus on anything else right now,” you cry as you take out your cellphone, frantically dialing 9-1-1. “Tell me about the football game you went to with Dad,” you sob, doing your best to keep your cool.
You know that you being a complete wreck isn’t going to help a damn thing. As Travis tries to goes on about the game he went to with Lloyd, you explain to the operator that hes been shot in his ribcage, his stomach, and you’re pretty sure in his hip. You can’t get a good look because you can’t stop fucking crying and there’s so much blood everywhere. Soon enough, the medics arrive and they’re taking Mary out in a body bag and while the other set of medics are tending to Travis.
You don’t want to leave his side, but once again, you’ve been with Lloyd long enough to know that you always need to take precaution. You’re quick to run upstairs and grab your purse, your phone, your second pistol, and any sensitive information. When you make your way downstairs, you grab your credit card that was on the kitchen countertop, as well as the pistol you shot the perpetrators with, before quickly following the paramedics out.
You send Lloyd a handful of text messages, as well as your parents and his, but no one is answering. The paramedics try to offer you a sedative, but at some point, you threaten to bite them if they don’t leave you alone.
You don’t need a sedative, you need Lloyd.
About 20 minutes after you arrive, both you and Lloyd’s parents show up, asking every fucking question known to man.
“I can’t do this right now,” you sob as they keep pushing for more answers than you can provide. “I need you all to stay here. There’s something I need to do.”
“What’s more important than taking care of your son?!” Lloyd’s Mother sobs.
“Finding your fucking son, his Father!” you snap, getting up and storming out.
You don’t mean to yell at her, just like you didn’t mean to yell at the paramedics, and just like you didn’t mean to yell at the doctors when they told you that there’s a strong chance that Travis might not make it. You don’t mean to snap at anyone, you just need your soulmate. Which is why you find yourself in a car service and on your way to CIA headquarters.
“DENNY!” you scream as you storm your way inside, scaring even the security guards.
“Ma’am, you can’t-”
“GET IN MY WAY AGAIN AND I WILL KILL YOU!” you scream. “DENNY CARMICHAEL, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE!”
“Ma’am-”
“Get me Denny Carmichael, or I wear to GOD, I’m going to start killing people. You think Lloyd Hansen is crazy? Just wait until you have to deal with his ex-wife.”
“Shit,” you hear one of the guards mumbles before he runs off.
Smart man.
It takes all of 40 seconds before you hear Denny yelling, “WHAT THE FUCK, Y/N?!”
“Call Lloyd and bring him back. I don’t care what the fuck he’s doing, I don’t care how important it is, get him back here, now!”
“You know I can’t...why are you covered in blood?!”
“GET HIM BACK HERE, DENNY! This isn’t a fucking request!”
“Y/N, you know I can’t just-”
“Travis has been shot, Denny. He’s been shot and he might not make it.”
“....what?”
“Someone is mad at Lloyd and they went after us for revenge...none of that matters right now! Your fucking godson is in surgery and his Father needs to fucking be here! I don’t care how important this mission is, you get him back here, and you get him back here now!”
“Okay okay, I’m on it. Just please-”
“I don’t see you on the FUCKING PHONE, DENNY!”
“Jesus, I’m on it! Just...lets get you back to the hospital, okay? Trav needs you both, so lets get you back.”
“Denny...I can’t handle this...I can’t do this without him,” you sob, finally breaking down as you collapse onto Denny and sob into his shoulder.
“We’ve been through this with Lloyd. It’s going to be okay. He’s a Hansen, isn’t he? If I believe he’s gonna pull through, then you have to, too.”
“I need him home, Denny. I can’t handle this without him.”
“I’ll get him back here, lets just get you to the hospital, okay?”
All you do is nod and Denny leads you both out as he makes his way to his car.
Denny knows that you’ve never forgiven for him for when Lloyd almost died, but you also know Denny loves Travis. He loves both you and Travis more than he cares to admit, because (like Lloyd) he hates showing any other emotion besides hard ass.
However, besides the fact that Denny actually cares about you, he also knows how much you and Lloyd are still obsessed and in love with one another. So, instead of leaving your side when you two arrive at the hospital, he sits next to you and lets you rest your head on his shoulder. You hear his soft sobs, and you want to be there for him, but you just can’t in the moment. So much has happened and your brain (as well as your heart) can’t figure out how to make heads or tails of all of this.
Hours go by and you’re almost asleep when you hear Lloyd yell, “WHERE THE HELL IS HE?! WHERE’S MY SON?!”
Sleep is probably something you’ll never experience again in this lifetime.
“Mr. Hansen-”
“WHERE THE FUCK IS MY SON?!”
“Lloyd-” you call sleepily as you make your way out into the hallway.
“YOU!” he shouts before shoving you against the wall with his hands around your neck.
“LLOYD!” his Mother shouts.
“Tried...tried to get you back...earlier,” you cough as you waive everyone else off. “Didn’t...answer...”
You know he’s not actually going to hurt you, but he’s also never been good at processing bad information, and this is earth shattering news.
“Let her go, Lloyd!” Denny demands.
“You were supposed to be watching him!” Lloyd yells, ignoring everyone else. “Where were you?! Getting your cunt fucked by some other-”
He’s cut off by you slapping him hard across the face, and his grip instantly loosens.
“Where were YOU?! I was at home, with our son on the weekend that you were supposed to have him! The fucking weekend you requested in the first fucking place! Look at me, Lloyd! Where the fuck does it look like I was?! I was there, in the house, when two people came in and shot Mary, thinking she was me, and then-”
“They thought...”
Lloyd’s eyes go from anger to full blown rage, and he instantly lets go of you.
“We have the same hair color and my credit card was on the kitchen counter-”
“Can someone explain to me what the fuck is going on?!” your Mom yells.
You give Denny a look and he’s quickly ushering everyone back into the waiting room.
“Where is he?” Lloyd asks softly after a few moments, trying to think as well as control his rage.
“He’s still in surgery.”
“Are you-”
“I’m fine, Lloyd. Physically at least.”
“You’re moving in with me for the time being.”
“Lloyd-”
“It’s just fucking safer that way. This isn’t a discussion or a debate, you’re packing what you need, selling that house, and moving in until you find a new one.”
As much you want to disagree with him, you know he’s right.
“I’ll pack some things-”
“Pack everything you need. I’ll get fucking movers if needed. I don’t want you back in that house at all.”
“Lloyd-”
“I can’t deal with them trying to take you away from me twice. I’ve already got Travis to be worried about...I can’t be worried about you too, Y/N. You may not believe it, but you are my whole world, you always have been. I’m not strong enough to deal with it.”
You make your way over to him and wrap your arms around his waist, and he gives you the tightest hug hes ever given you.
“I can’t lose you,” he whispers softly into you hair, and you force yourself to hold back tears.
“I can’t go to that house alone, Lloyd. Not because I’m scared, but because...”
“I know, baby. How long has he been in surgery?”
“6 hours,” you sigh.
“Lets go now, drop your stuff off at my place, and we’ll come back, okay?”
You just nod as you let go of him and take his hand. Neither of you bother telling your families your plan, because you need a break and Lloyd will just start yelling. You grab your purse and he sends Denny a text telling him you two will be back shortly.
The car ride is somber and quiet, Lloyd holds your hand the entire time, and you keep checking your phone to see if they’re any updates. Tina has sent you a handful of texts, but you don’t have the strength or energy to respond. You haven’t slept for hours, you’re now covered in dried blood, and you’re body is dehydrated from all the tears you’ve cried.
By the time Lloyd pulls up to your house, you just want to take a fucking nap.
“Pack some clothes and I’ll leave post-its on the things you really want, so the movers know what to pack,” Lloyd tells you softly as you both stand in the doorway of your house.
The reality of whats happened in the last few hours hits you all over again, and you just stand there frozen.
“Hey, nothing is gonna happen. I’m here,” Lloyd promises, gently placing a hand on your lower back.
“How...um...how will you know what to...” you sniffle.
“I know you well enough to know what matters and what doesn’t. Just get clothes, okay?”
“I don’t know...the living area is where everything...I don’t know if anything’s been cleaned...it doesn’t look like it so...ya know.”
“Let me worry about everything, you just get some clothes,” he urges as his phone goes off. “It’s Denny.”
“Is it an update?!”
“If it were, one of our parents would have called. I’ll take it and take care of everything else, you just grab clothes.”
“Okay,” you sob softly.
You make your way past the kitchen and living area as quickly as you can, and practically run up the steps. You grab two suitcases, and just pulling things out of your drawers, not even paying attention to what you’re grabbing. You pull out drawers from your makeup dresser and just dump all their contents in, and you’re about to do the same thing with the drawers from your nightstand when you hear a loud thud.
“FUCK!” Lloyd yells and you’re instantly running down the steps.
“What’s wrong?! Are you okay?!”
“I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m sorry, Hummingbird.”
“Is Travis-”
“There’s no update.”
“What’s wrong-”
“You don’t need to hear it right now.”
“Lloyd, don’t push me out. Not right now. What did Denny say?”
“A message was left for me. They’ve got eyes on Travis and they’re coming for you next-stop, I’m home now,” he tries to calm you as he rushes over to you and wraps his arms around you.
“Travis-”
“I won’t let those fuckers get their hands on you or Travis. I promise.”
“Lloyd-”
“Did I promise to always to take care of you?”
“Yes, but-”
“But nothing. Those pieces of shit only went after you because they knew I wasn’t around. It’s not gonna happen again. It’s never going to happen again.”
“Lloyd...what about you?”
“If I have to die to protect you then-”
“I can’t lose you,” you confess softly.
“Then I’m not going anywhere,” he promises you sincerely. “Finish packing and I’ll get started on marking things up.”
“Lloyd-”
“Do what I said,” he demands gently.
You take a few moments to get yourself together before returning back up the steps. You’re quick to gather up a few things before closing up your two suitcases and slowly making your way into your son’s room. You mean to grab some of his toys and a few shirts you know that he loves, but end up just sitting on his bed and looking around.
How did everything get so out of control? Aren’t there supposed to be some sort of rules? Isn’t there a line you don’t cross? Yeah, they’re all ruthless killers, and killing you would’ve been one thing, but going after your son? You know Lloyd goes to extremes, you’re not a fool, so maybe this is penance. However, for as terrible as Lloyd is, he’d never go out of his way to kill a child. The ones that hes killed were assignments, and while that’s not something to be celebrated, it speaks volumes. Lloyd did work and this was retaliation. Travis had nothing to deserve this besides be a Hansen.
The best one.
“Hummingbird?” Lloyd calls softly, pulling you out of your thoughts.
“He has...favorite shirts and toys...I want him to have them, ya know? God, he loves this house so fucking much. Between the pool and the swing set, I think he wants me to leave it to him when I die,” you laugh with a sob.
“He’s going to be-”
“Don’t. Don’t give me false hope, Lloyd. I can’t...after everything, I can’t deal with it right now-”
“What did you tell me while you were pregnant?”
You instantly remember what he’s referring to and chuckle softly as you wipe your eyes, “Hansen men are the worst, so they’ll survive anything out of spite.”
“Our boy is a Hansen, isn’t he?”
“I wouldn’t have anyone else’s kid.”
“Then he’s gonna be just fine out of spite,” he smiles at you, but you can see the weariness in his eyes. “We’ll go to my house, you can take a shower, and we’ll head back to the hospital.”
“I don’t have time to shower. What if he wakes up? He’ll-”
“He’ll need to not see his Mother not covered in his blood. Shower and we’ll head back, okay?”
“Lloyd-”
“Hummingbird, just trust me, okay?”
How could not?
You nod before heading over to Travis’ drawers and grabbing his favorite shirts and pajamas. You pull out his little duffle bag and pack it, putting in a few of his favorite toys, before giving his room one final look over.
“It’s going to be okay,” Lloyd promises you softly.
You close the door behind you, going back into your to grab your laptops and chargers for all your devices, then quickly follow Lloyd down the steps. Once you two are back in his car, you just keep your eyes on the house as he pulls out of your driveway.
You’d made a whole new life for yourself, and just like that, it was gone.
You two are half way to Lloyd’s when you realize, “We have to go back! I have to get the photo albums! His baby pictures, our wedding photos, family-”
“Calm down, Hummingbird. I packed them. They were the first things I grabbed.”
“Are you sure you got all of them?” you ask frantically, turning around and checking the backseat.
“I’m sure. Just rest. You’ve been doing everything...just try and let me take care of things. I know I’m a dick, but at least I’m capable of getting things done,” he smirks.
You let out a small giggle as you get comfortable in the passenger seat and take a deep breath.
You forgot how nice it is when you and Lloyd work together instead of against each other.
When you two reach his house, he makes you go inside and take a shower while he brings all of your things into the house. It doesn’t hit you how worn out you are until you start taking off your clothes. Seeing them on the floor, the blood that’s now dried onto your body, makes you realize just how long you’ve been awake, and how much has happened. You make the water as hot as you can stand it, and let out a sigh of relief when it hits your skin like a million tears that you haven’t cried yet.
You lean against the shower wall and think over everything that’s happened over the last few hours, days, and months. It would be so easy to be enraged with Lloyd, because you begged him for years to quit his job, but you know hes just as torn as you are, if not more. You know how much he loves you and Travis, even if he isn’t always the best at showing it, and you know he’d take a bullet for either of you in an instant. Lloyd is a lot of terrible things, but he’s also an amazing Father. For as much as you want to be angry with him and scream at him, you know how much he loves and adores Travis. It’s not like he became a saint when Travis was born, but he did stop being so angry all the fucking time.
For all of the things that have gone wrong between the two of you, Travis isn’t one of them.
You laugh when you see a bottle of your favorite soap on the shower floor and shake your head. You know it’s not for any of the women he brings over, cause it’s never been touched and is close to it’s expiration date.
Lloyd Hansen: always the dreamer.
You grab a wash cloth off the rack next to the shower and let it get soaked before squeezing more than a handful of soap out of the bottle and scrubbing yourself as hard as you can; almost breaking the skin. You figure, if you can scrub hard enough, you can scrub the pain away. Yeah, it’s bullshit, but it’s still worth a shot, isn’t it?
“Hummingbird?” Lloyd calls as he softly knocks on the door.
“Hmm?”
“Are you okay?” he asks, coming into the bathroom.
“Gotta get...there’s more blood than I realized-it’s not mine,” you assure him instantly when you see the alarm in his eyes.
“When’s the last time you ate something?”
“Jesus, I don’t know. Probably...” you trail off before you fall into a fit of laughter.
“Babe?”
“I’m sorry...it’s not funny at all,” you breathe as you lean against the shower wall, “I just...we went to the grocery store. I spent over $200 on groceries that are just gonna go bad,” you laugh. “I spent over $200, saw my son’s attacker at the fucking butcher counter, and it’s all gonna spoil. Mary got killed because I had a fucking meeting and left my card on the counter, so she could order a fucking pizza because I didn’t have time to make his favorite meal and it was a sort of peace offering! Even though I had just spent a shit ton of money on groceries! You gotta see the humor in that, can’t you? It’s kinda funny?” you laugh as your tears start to fall.
“Hummingbird-”
“This is all my fault! This happened on my watch and-”
“Don’t you dare. This isn’t your fault-”
“You were all too sure of it in the hospital!”
“That was...you know me and my temper. This-”
“Lloyd...he’s fighting for his life and it’s my fault,” you cry as you slide down the wall.
“My sweet little Hummingbird,” he sighs, getting into the shower and getting on the floor with you, wrapping his arms around you and holding you close.
“You’re gonna ruin your clothes!”
“Fuck my clothes,” he chuckles and you laugh into his chest as you wrap your arms around him tight.
Its moments like this when you remember just why you fell in love with Lloyd. He can be so fucking sweet and caring, and he reserves that small part of himself for you. No, it’s not some Disney fantasy, but it’s enough for you. Truth be told, if Lloyd would have told you that he’d quit his job, you wouldn’t have asked for the divorce. You would’ve looked past the cheating and found a way to fix everything that was wrong. The divorce didn’t happen because of lack of love, it happened because worrying about him and Travis all the fucking time was taking a toll on you emotionally and mentally.
Keeping a pistol at your bedside, in the glove compartment, sleeping in your car outside of Travis’ friend’s houses when he would go to sleepovers, keeping another pistol in your home office...it just became too much, and it’s not like Lloyd didn’t see it, he just refused to acknowledge it. You just weren’t built like him, and you didn’t want to be. However, in his defense, it’s not like he ever hid anything from you. In his own Lloyd Hansen way, he really did try. Lloyd has never hidden just how much he loves you, and he always took all precautions to keep you safe. When Travis came along, he tried even harder to keep you both safe.
It’s not lost on either of you that the love you feel for one another has always been complicated.
“We have to get back to the hospital,” you mumble as you wipe your eyes.
“Y/N, I mean it. None of this is your fault. The way you love and lookout for him...the both of us really, this isn’t on you. I’ll kill those fuckers and I’ll keep you both safe.”
“Lloyd, what happened?” you ask, looking up at him.
“Another time, okay?”
“Don’t keep-”
“I’m not saying that I’m not going to tell you, I’m saying that enough has happened and I’ll tell you after you’ve had some rest. Plus, you know your parents are gonna have a million questions.”
“I can’t fucking deal with them right now,” you sigh as you lay your head on his chest again.
“We’ll get through this, Hummingbird. So will Travis.”
“I love you, Lloyd.”
“I love you too,” he responds softly before pressing a soft kiss into your hair.
You two stay on the floor a little longer before decide it’s time to get up. You make sure all the blood and soap is off of your body, before getting out. Lloyd hands you a towel before getting out his clothes and wrapping a towel around his waist.
Even with clothes on, the man makes you weak in the knees, but it’s been so damn long since you’ve seen him naked. You can’t stop yourself from staring.
“I set you up in the spare room next to mine,” he smirks as steps into his shower shoes.
You can’t even blame him for being arrogant this time. Tattooed gorgeous fuck.
“Why-”
“Travis’ room is right across from mine, and I know you’ll feel better. It’ll make me feel better having you both so close.”
“Travis isn’t home.”
“He will be. I want all of his care happening here.”
“How are you so calm with him being at the hospital now?”
“Denny’s still there and he’s not gonna let a thing happen to him.”
“He has-”
“His Godson and you are his top priority right now. Get dressed and we’ll leave,” he tells you softly, walking over and kissing your forehead softly before leaving the bathroom.
You look yourself over in the mirror and let out a heavy sigh.
You’re gonna need a vacation and multiple spa days when all of this is over.
When you get into the spare bedroom, you smile at the three photo albums that are on your bed. He really is thorough. You throw your towel off to the side and rifle through your suitcase for something to wear but, for as silly as it is, nothing feels right. You stand there in your underwear and literally throw all of your clothes around, trying to find something, but nothing works.
“You ready?” Lloyd asks as he walks into the bedroom.
“I don’t know what to wear. How silly is that? Our son is still in surgery, and I’m trying to figure out what the hell to wear.”
“Anything will be fine, Hummingbird.”
“Then you pick, because I don’t know,” you sigh as you step aside. “I don’t know anything right now.”
“He’s going to be okay, Humming-”
“What if he can’t walk? What if...Lloyd-”
“I can go back by myself if-”
“No,” you sniffle as you dry your eyes, “I can do this. I need to be there for him. I need to be there for the both of you-”
“I’m fine-”
“You’ve never been good at lying to me, so I don’t recommend starting now,” you smile softly.
Lloyd says nothing as closes the small space between you two and kisses you passionately and walks you both back towards the bed. You don’t even fight him because you need it. You need him. Soon you feel the edge of the bed against the back of legs and you know you two need to stop.
For multiple reasons.
“Lloyd....we don’t have time...we need to get back,” you moan as he guides you back onto the bed before continuing to kiss down your body.
“It won’t take me long to make you relax,” he coos softly as he pulls your panties down. “We both need this, please,” he begs softly.
Before you have a chance to make an argument, you feel his tongue on your clit, and you lose all resolve almost instantly.
“Fuck,” you sigh, gripping his hair as you grind your pussy against his face.
Four years is a long fucking time to be without your soulmate intimately, and you can tell that Lloyd feels the same by how desperate he is to bring you off. When he easily slides two fingers into your weeping cunt, you start massaging one of your own breasts as you arch your back a little.
“So close you,” you whimper as he starts pulling on your clit with his lips, you know you’re not gonna last much longer. “Baby...baby, please!” you beg as you prop yourself up on your shoulders and meet his loving gaze.
Lloyd slides a third finger in and curls all three, and you know you’re done for.
“Oh my...fuck, LLOYD!” you scream out as you squirt all over his fingers, knowing his face will be glistening your juices.
He fucks you through your high with his fingers while he kisses his way up your body. When his lips on yours again, the taste of you ever present on his lips, you can feel just how desperate his for you on your inner thigh.
“We don’t have time for that, Hummingbird,” he husks as you start to undo his pants. “Gotta....fuck,” he groans as you start to stroke him.
“Just wanna return the favor,” you moan. “We don’t have to do that, I just...you gave me an orgasm-”
“The way I’ve been getting off to the thought of you...we don’t have time,” he moans as he forces himself to stop you.
Of course, him getting forceful with you only makes you long for him more.
“Another time, Hummingbird. We have to...Jesus!” he exclaims as you grind your hips against his. “If you still...fuck, if you still want this when we get back, I’ll be more than happy to destroy this perfect little body.”
“I love you, baby.”
“I love you too, Hummingbird. More than I’ll ever be able to put into words,” he promises as he slowly pulls out his three fingers and you whimper in protest. “Wear the ‘Alice in Chains’ shirt with your black jeans,” he sighs as he gets up. “He can’t see you right now, but I can.”
As he walks out of the room, you lay there for a second, coming terms with another thing that was never supposed to happen, before getting up and getting dressed.
By the time you two get back to the hospital, both of your families are beside themselves, and Denny looks worn out. Also, Tina is here, and she looks just as concerned as she is anxious.
What now?
“Has there been any change?” you ask Denny as Lloyd makes his way to the nurses’ desk.
“One of the bullets hit his arteries,” Denny starts, “they were able to fix it, but the hit he took to his stomach...it was harder to get out than they expected-”
“How bad is it, Denny? And don’t bullshit me.”
“That’s why the last part has taken so long. That wound might be the one that kills him-hey!” Denny shouts, catching you as you collapse. “I said might, you don’t get to quit on him! If I have hope, you have to have it too!”
“Denny-”
“He’s still fighting, Y/N. No one has declared him dead, so he’s still here-”
“Denny-”
“He’s still here, Y/N,” he quickly interrupts. “You have to hold on to that for now.”
You rationalize everything he says with a nod before accepting his help with getting up, then making your way to the waiting area and sitting down in one of the waiting room chairs. Soon enough, you’re joined by Lloyd and you take his hand in yours before laying your head on his shoulder.
“You need to eat something, Hummingbird,” he coos softly.
“You eat something.”
“I already did,” he chuckles and you playfully hit his arm. “C’mon, lets go to the cafeteria. It doesn’t have to be anything big, but just eat something. I already know you’re going straight for the wine when we get back. Eat something, please?”
“Since when do you ask nicely?”
“Since I know when to tread lightly,” he scoffs before kissing the top of your head and you laugh softly.
“I want him to be okay.”
“I know baby, but you have to be okay too. If anything changes, you know they’ll all get in contact with us immediately.”
“Fine...shit! Mary’s family and my job-”
“It’s all been taken care of. You’ll talk to Mary’s family when you’re ready, and her funeral has been covered. Just focus on Travis for now,” he tells you gently.
“Something small?”
“Something small.”
You both make your way out, hand in hand, and you don’t miss the way your Mother looks at you.
She’s clearly unhappy about it.
“We’re gonna grab a bite to eat, be back in a little,” he tells everyone, without even stopping.
“Babe, can we talk for a second?” Tina asks, looking from you to Lloyd.
Alright, what the fuck is going on?
“Sure, come with us to the cafeteria.”
“Just you.”
“Tina, what’s-”
“If it’s not an immediate update about Travis, you can talk to her when we get back,” Lloyd practically snaps before pulling you along with him.
If they slept together, you’re blowing up the fucking building...once Travis is safe, of course.
“Lloyd, I swear to God, if you slept with Tina-”
“I haven’t slept with Tina since Freshman year of college, and that was only because I wanted to know more about you. Well, that and we were both shitfaced.”
“Then what was that all about?”
“After you eat.”
“Lloyd-”
“After you eat,” he tells you more firmly before walking off towards the counter to place his order.
Fine.
“Why’d you get me a grilled cheese?” you ask as he sets a plate down in front of you.
“Well, they don’t have dumplings or pasta, so this was the next best thing,” he smirks and you laugh as you flip him off. “You said you saw one of the guys at the butcher counter in the grocery store-”
“I’m pretty sure I saw both of them at two different places, cause I heard them both trying to confirm that it was me when they shot Mary...something about how Andrew would kill them if they didn’t kill the right person.”
“Did one of them have a tattoo of an anchor between his thumb and forefinger?” Lloyd practically growls as stabs at his chicken salad.
You’re so happy hes finally started listening to you and just started eating more salad.
“The bank teller did. Uh, I didn’t go up to the butcher’s counter, but the guy had a short, brown, curly hair, and a tattoo under his eye that said ‘pain’.”
“Mother fucker!” he proclaims as he slams his hand down on the table.
Well, at least he seems to know who they are.
“Lloyd, calm down-”
“I’m gonna fuckin’-”
“Huckleberry,” you plead softly and he softens almost instantly.
“You haven’t called me that in forever.”
“Four years does feel like forever,” you smile weakly. “Tell me what’s going on. Is this why you don’t want me talking to Tina?”
“I don’t want you talking to Tina because I’m going to fucking kill her, and I have to refrain from doing it in front of our fucking family,” he mutters dangerously before shoveling a fork full of salad into his mouth.
“I’m sorry, come again? Tina? She did this?”
“I’m sure not purposely, because she loves you, but she has a very big part in all of this.”
“This doesn’t make any sense! She’s Travis’ godmother, she wouldn’t...how do you know?”
“It’s my job to know, Hummingbird. I told you, I always keep an eye out for you. Granted, she got the fake information I left, and her little workers went rouge, more than likely trying to prove themselves, and that’s why everything went wrong.”
“Lloyd, she loves-”
“She loves you and Travis. She hates me. I guarantee that’s why she wants to talk to you in private. The way she looked at you, the way she looked completely out of her fucking mind when she got here...this was never supposed to blow back on you. Which, poor fucking Tina, but I’m still gonna fucking kill her.”
“Lloyd, please just tell me-”
“You’re not eating.”
“I’m sorry, I’m still trying to comprehend the fact that you just told me that you’re going to murder my best friend!” you whisper harshly.
“People die-”
“Fucking don’t, Lloyd. Not while our son is fighting for his life. Do not sit here and tell me how people die all the time, like we live in the same fucking reality!” you snap and he sighs.
After all this time, it’s completely insane to you how he always forgets. He would come home to feel normal. After being surrounded by killers all fucking day...it has been a while though. A while since you two have had a real and honest talk...you’re both the same, but have changed in so many different ways.
“You need to eat-”
“Do you have to kill her? We don’t even know-”
“You don’t know what happened, I do. I can’t let her live, not after this.”
“Lloyd-”
“You’ll see after she talks to you. Eat.”
“Lloyd-”
“Hummingbird, please eat. I know it’s been over 24 hours since you’ve last eaten anything, so please eat.”
“How do you know so much about all the damn time?” you scowl before begrudgingly take a bite out of your sandwich.
“Just because we got a divorce, doesn’t mean I stop keeping tabs on you.”
“Lloyd-”
“I didn’t file for the divorce, you did.”
“I didn’t cheat, you did.”
“Lets not fucking do this here.”
“You’re the one keeping fucking tabs-”
“I’m not doing it to be your fucking hall monitor. I’ve have you watched so I can keep an eye out on your and keep you safe. Just because I fucked up doesn’t meant I don’t love you. You know why I did what I did-there’s an update!” he tells you as his phone goes off.
“How do you-”
“It’s my Mother, we should go-”
“Lloyd...”
“He’s fine, Hummingbird. I promise,” he reassures you softly.
You both make your way back to the top floor, hand-in-hand, and you take not of how much tighter his grip gets once you get closer to where everyone is congregated.
God, how you wish you two would’ve been able to work all shit out, so you’d be able to go through this together. Not as Lloyd Hansen and his ex-wife.
“He made it through the surgery,” the doctor smiles as you both approach him. “It was touch and go for a while, but he’s strong-”
“He’s a Hansen,” Lloyd smiles proudly and you roll your eyes.
“That he is,” the doctor laughs, “he’s still not out of the woods. He hasn’t woken up and we don’t know when he will, and he’s going to need a lot of therapy, but he can go home-”
“Today,” Lloyd quickly interjects, looking towards Denny who just nods.
Whatever expenses you thought you were gonna have to worry about, they’re gone.
Your tax dollars hard at work.
“Mr. Hansen-”
“He comes home today. Whatever medical supplies he needs, he’ll have them, and whatever care is needed will be provided around the clock. My assistant is on his way and he’ll go over everything with you. Travis is not staying here.”
“Lloyd-”
“He’s not staying here for another minute,” he snaps towards his Mother.
And that was that.
Soon enough, information is being taken down, plans are being made, Lloyd is all but shouting demands, he’s choosing caregivers only he trusts, and Denny is giving him the next six months off.
“What just happened?” you ask as you get in the passenger seat of Lloyd’s car.
“You don’t need to worry about it.”
“Lloyd-”
“You’ve done enough, Hummingbird. Let me take care of the rest.”
“He’s our son. I should know-”
“All you need to know is that you’re safe. Travis is safe, you’re safe, and I’m never letting anything happen to either of you ever again.”
“What about Tina?”
“She’s going to come over tomorrow night to talk to you. She’s gonna tell you everything and then I’m gonna stick a fucking bullet into her brain.”
“Lloyd-”
“She doesn’t get to get away with this. I know you love her and all that shit, but they’re some things that are unforgivable. This is one of those things.”
“You haven’t even heard her side-”
“I know her side, I don’t need to hear it. My son was almost killed, you were almost killed...I don’t give a fuck about how bad she feels. She’s lucky that I didn’t kill her on the spot.”
“Huckleberry, please just tell me what happened.”
“Don’t fucking call me that just because you know it makes me soft.”
“Then fucking calm down and talk to me-”
“You don’t need to worry about anything from here on out-”
“Lloyd...you still don’t get it,” you chuckle softly as he pulls into his driveway. “You aren’t not out of harms way, so I’m going to worry! This isn’t over because Travis isn’t in fucking surgery anymore! You think I married you because it seemed like a fun idea? You think I was fucking bored? You think I didn’t have other guys gunning for my affection?! I fucking love you, Lloyd! I don’t know if you’ll be okay and...lets just not get into this now. Too much has happened, Travis is getting set up in the house, we both need sleep...Huckleberry, if you don’t get it by now, you’re just never gonna get it, and I’m really sorry about that,” you shrug before getting out of his car, and slamming the door shut.
Fuck him.
If he still doesn’t get it after all this time, then fuck him. How dare he?! He should know you well enough to know that you wouldn’t be this stressed out and frustrated over someone you don’t you don’t give a shit about. The divorce never fucking mattered. Lloyd has been the center of your universe since you fell in love with him. Hell, since you fell in like with him. Then you two went and had Travis, and it just added on. Yes, you know Lloyd has his flaws and isn’t perfect, but he’s your perfect mess. You tried to not fall in love with him, but it clearly didn’t work.
Every mission he goes on scares you, because you’re not sure how he’ll come back, if he comes back at all. Every time you see him, you commit it to memory, because you might not ever see him again. You re-read his affectionate texts because your heart still yearns for him all these years later. So, if he doesn’t understand that you divorced him because you love and care for him too much, and you always will, then he can go fuck himself.
He’s slow to follow behind you, and you feel his intense gaze on you, and you know he’s going through everything in his head. As the doctors go through everything with you, and the caregivers set everything up, you wonder if he’s even listening.
You’re probably gonna have to write all this shit down for him later.
“Is there anything you need or want us to do before we leave?” one of the doctors asks as she packs up her things.
“We’re fine,” Lloyd nods as he stands off to the side.
“I know you’ll have round the clock service, but here’s my number just in case of any emergency,” she smirks at Lloyd, handing him her card before she walks out of Travis’s bedroom.
She’s a bold one, ya gotta give her that.
“I’ll sit with him so you can rest-”
“Denny’s made sure the house is heavily secured. Lets both go lay down.”
“What if he-”
“They’ll wake us up,” Lloyd reassures you, kissing your temple softly as you wrap your arms around his waist.
He’s a piece of shit, but he’s your piece shit. Divorced or not.
You lean into him for just a moment, before forcing yourself away. You slowly and quietly make your way to the room set up for you, as Lloyd goes into his bedroom and leaves the door cracked; and you tell yourself it’ll all be okay. All of you will be just fine.
You toss and turn for about an hour before you force yourself out of bed, and make your way to Lloyd’s bedroom and knock on it softly.
“You know you can always come in, Hummingbird,” he replies nonchalantly.
“I can’t sleep...”
“Get in,” he encourages, turning the covers on his bed down, keeping his attention still on his phone.
It’s not like you need much convincing.
“What’s happening?” you ask as you settle into his bed.
“Denny is still in the middle of a panic attack, so there have been 30 other guards assigned to protect this house-”
“That’s not what I mean, Huckleberry. How are you?” you ask softly as you lay your head on his chest.
“Just rest right now.”
“Lloyd-”
“You have enough on your mind and on your plate. We’ll talk about me after you rest,” he promises as he presses a soft kiss into your hair.
“Don’t...Lloyd, don’t fucking go and put yourself more at risk than you already are. Do you understand?”
“Humming-”
“I fucking mean it. I can’t do this without you...I can’t...I can’t live in a world without you. I’m already dealing with Travis....don’t you fucking...” you trail off as you start to sob.
“Changes are going to be made, Hummingbird. I swear to you, I’ll never put you through anything like this again. Concerning Travis or myself.”
“I love you, Huckleberry.”
“I love you, Hummingbird. Just sleep,” he urges, stroking the side of your arm as he kisses the top of your head. “Sleep.”
For the first time in a long time, despite all hell that happened that day, you’re able to fall asleep almost instantly. Feeling safer and more loved than you have in years.
**
When you wake up, Lloyd is gone but you can hear him yelling about something downstairs. You sit up to an open door and you see that the door to Travis’ room is open. You grab your phone before getting out of bed and slowly make your way to his room.
“Has he woken up at all?” you ask the doctor softly.
“Not yet.”
“Is he...will he wake up? Lloyd interrupted the other doctor he could really say much...”
“We’re monitoring him closely. Yes, the surgery went better than we all expected, but his body is still weak. He took on a lot, so we need to-”
“No, I get it...I understand,” you sniffle as you take a seat in the chair by Travis’ bedside. “Can we have a minute?”
“Of course,” the doctor nods with a soft smile before leaving.
“Hey sweetheart,” you sob with a weak smile, taking Travis’ hand and squeezing it softly. “It’s Mom, I finally have time,” you laugh humorlessly. “You always want to hear stories from when your Dad and I were together, so here’s a fun one,” you chuckle as you start searching through your music library, smiling once you finally find ‘Sea of Love’ by Cat Power and playing it.
“I can not begin to explain how much your Dad hates this song, but it’s one of my favorites. We got married in Hawaii and I annoyed the hell out of him until he agreed to let this be our first song. From that day on, I always played it on our anniversary, and we would dance in the living room. No matter how busy either of us were, we stop to dance to this song. Then, I got pregnant with you,” you sob with a smile as you wipe your eyes. “If you were ever wondering where you got your impeccable taste in music from, it’s me because I made you a playlist and played it ever single day that I was pregnant. Jesus, your delivery was a shit show. Your Dad was yelling at doctors, I was pelting the staff with ice chips because of course, that would make you come out faster, and your Godfather was running around like a chicken with his head cut off because it was the first time that he had ever truly given a damn about anything....both sets of grandparents were crying messes...it was a circus. However, 9 hours later, at 8 pounds and 13 ounces, you were brought into this world. You didn’t scream and you didn’t cry, you just looked at me and smiled, and we were instantly best friends. The moment your Dad laid eyes on you, he was in love with you. Everything else that was wrong didn’t matter. Holding you for the first time...I knew my life was complete. I had you, your Dad....nothing else mattered. It was everything. Soon enough, I fell asleep, but your Dad was too wired. He refused to put you down until the nurses took you from him. When I woke up, he was holding you and walking around with you while this song played,” you sob even harder as you dry your eyes. “I’m so sorry, baby. I should’ve been there. If I could’ve taken those bullets for you, I would have. I’m so fucking sorry, but please...I need you to hang on. You haven’t even begun to truly annoy me, you don’t know how to drive a car, you haven’t gone to or avoided your prom...you have a whole life to live and I’m excited to watch you live it. You are the sweetest soul and the world needs you, so please...please, just hang on for us. Your Dad and I need you so much...please,” you start crying uncontrollably and you feel an arm wrap around you.
“He’s going to be okay,” Lloyd promises softly.
“Lloyd...,” you sob as you lean into his waist. “How did...he’s a good boy! He didn’t do anything to deserve this!”
“I know, baby,” he responds, his voice cracking as he rubs your back. “It’s all going to be okay. I swear to you, everything will be fine.”
“I gotta get out of this room,” you sniffle before pausing the song, getting up, and walking out.
You go into the spare bedroom that was set up for you and rifle through your purse, until you find your pack of cigarettes. You then quickly to make your way downstairs and into the kitchen, ignoring the mercenaries that now occupy the massive living area, and grab a wine glass. You fill it to the brim before grabbing a cigarette, lighting it, then taking a seat at the dinner table.
Yeah, Lloyd hates you smoking in the house, but you think you’ve earned a pass for the next few days.
“I thought you quit,” Lloyd sighs, coming into the kitchen and pouring himself a glass of scotch.
“Well, our son is upstairs fighting for his life, so I figured I’d really commit for a while,” you mutter before taking a drag from it.
“Just say it,” he says as he takes a seat across from you.
“Say what?”
“This is my fault.”
“I’m not gonna throw you a fucking pity party, Lloyd,” you chuckle humorlessly, “not right now.”
“If this wasn’t my job-”
“If this wasn’t your job, if I hadn’t been working, if I hadn’t left my credit card out, if I hadn’t had my blinds closed, they’re a lot of fucking ‘if’s so don’t sit here and try to get me to blame you. I may be a cunt, but I’m not that fucking petty.”
“I blamed you.”
“That’s because you’re a fucking asshole.”
“Y/N-”
“Lloyd, I don’t wanna fucking do this with you. I haven’t felt this terrible since you were in that fucking coma-”
“That’s why you never came by?”
“God, you are such a dick,” you scoff. “I was in that fucking hospital all day, every day, until you got out of that coma. When they tried to tell me I had to leave, I punched a male nurse in the face. Don’t fucking sit here and try to tell me how much I do or don’t love you, because you have no fucking idea. You can’t even begin to fathom how much you truly mean to me. How much you’ve always meant to me.”
“Then why not take me back? Why not make this work?”
You knew it was coming.
“Lloyd-”
“Answer the question, Y/N. You’ve been dodging it for four years-”
“I haven’t dodged shit!”
“You haven’t fucking answered it!”
“You really wanna fucking do this today?!”
“You’re already here!”
“Fine. You wanna know why we can’t just “work this out”? Because fuck you! It’s not even the fucking job! It’s you! Nothing is ever enough for you! There can never be a conversation, you just have to be right all the time! You just have to know every single fucking thing! No one else can ever be right! I love you! I love you to the point that I made myself miserable for the last two years of our marriage so that you could be happy! I had two fucking miscarriages, Lloyd! TWO! You wanna sit here and fucking tell me that I’m so selfish? That I’m a cunt?! You have no room to fucking talk! I have given you everything I have in me, and it wasn’t enough for you! I wasn’t enough for you! You are Travis’ hero, and it’s not enough for you! You have a higher kill count than anyone in the fucking agency, and it is STILL NOT ENOUGH! You’re hurt?! You’re wounded?! You and Travis are my entire universe and you still don’t fucking get it! You think that I don’t know you’re a fucking lunatic?! You think I don’t know that you have a couple of screws loose?! I LOVE YOU ANYWAY, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! I love you and you keep missing the point! I was never expecting roses and warm hugs everyday from you, but I expected you to at least meet half way sometimes! But you never fucking did,” you sob. “Then you, being the piece of shit you are, went and fucking cheated, and you know what? I’ll take responsibility for that. I pushed you away and took away the one thing you really needed: affection. Fine, I’m a bitch and it’s all my fault. However, you couldn’t just let it be a clean split, could you? No, because Lloyd Hansen can never just accept the things he doesn’t like, can he? You just have to be a dick about it. The texts, the fucking phone calls, the blatant lack of respect for me at all! Yet, I’m always defending you to Travis. Making excuses as to why you miss his birthday parties, why you aren’t able to go to his soccer games, why you can’t go on the family camping trips, just to make sure you’re still a god in his eyes! Now, after all the shit that’s happened, you’re gonna fucking sit here and tell me that I wasn’t at the hospital while you were in that fucking coma?! You’re gonna fucking try and tell me about shit you don’t even know about?! You know they were going to let you fucking die?! They were just gonna stop working on you and I threatened each and every one of those fuckers, because a world without you in it, is a world I don’t wanna fucking live in for whatever reason! You wanna know why can’t we work things out?! Because of you! The issue has always been you! So don’t fucking sit here, being all self righteous, like I haven’t done my absolute best to make you happy since this shit show started!” you yell, ashing your cigarette on his table, because fuck him.
Lloyd says nothing, but he looks at you as if he wants to throw you across the room. Whether it’s because you ashed your cigarette on the table or because of what you said, you’re not really sure. Instead, he gets up and storms out, knocking a chair over on his way out.
Great.
You don’t know why you took the bait. You knew he was picking a fight because he feels like shit, and he needed you to yell at him. He knows how to push all the right buttons at the worse time, so when you didn’t yell at him for Travis, of course the failed marriage was the next best bet. You know he blames and hates himself for everything, but Lloyd doesn’t know how to vocalize feeling like shit or failure. That’s why you feel so fucking special when he apologizes for anything, because he never apologizes to anyone for anything.
Maybe Travis if he feels especially bad about something.
However, you took it too far this time.
It’s not like anything you said was wrong, but you didn’t have to be so fucking harsh. God, he didn’t even know about the fucking miscarriages. Yes, Lloyd Hansen is a complete and total asshole, but he’s also the love of your life. There’s a way to go about everything, and you screaming at him wasn’t the way to go about that. Yeah, he needs to feel like an asshole because it fuels his...whatever the fuck is wrong with him, but all of that at once...that wasn’t the way to do it.
You’re slow to finish off your wine before slowly making your way upstairs to his bedroom, and the scene in front of you shocks the hell out of you.
He’s sitting on the bed and crying.
To this day, you’re convinced that Lloyd Hansen has never cried, not even as a baby. Out of pure stubbornness. Sure, his voice has cracked a total of two times since you’ve known him, but hes never actually cried. As far as he’s concerned, crying is a sign of weakness. Sure, you can cry because you’re a woman, but Lloyd? He’d never dream of it. He’d get shot in the dick before he’d cry, let alone let someone else actually see it happening.
“I’m sorry, Huckleberry,” you sigh, closing the door behind you as enter the room. “I took it too far-”
“It’s what I fucking deserve.”
“Stop it. Don’t do this to yourself, not right now.”
“I was a horrible husband and I’m a horrible Father-”
“No you aren’t,” you tell him softly as you stand in front of him.
“Don’t, Y/N. Don’t fucking stand there and tell me-”
“Travis couldn’t have a better Father, honey. All you’re doing for him, all you’re going to do for him, it’s more than any other parent would do. Us? It’s not like all parts of our relationship were awful.”
“I didn’t make it easy,” he sniffs as he wipe his nose with the back of his hand.
“I was able to give you a run for your money from time to time,” you chuckle and he scoffs as he wraps his arms around your waist. “I never stopped loving you, Lloyd-”
“Why? There’s no use cause we both know I’m not worth loving,” he questions as he looks up at you.
“Because,” you smile down at him as you caress the side of his face, “you’re my Huckleberry.”
Two fools. You two have always been a pair of fucking fools.
“Lloyd,” you moan as he kisses your hip and unbuttons your jeans.
“Don’t tell me ‘no’, Hummingbird. Please, not when I need you so much,” he begs as he pulls your jeans and panties down.
“We shouldn’t...fuck! Baby!” you whimper as he starts to massage your clit with his tongue. “God, you’re so fucking good at that!”
“Always taste so fucking good,” he mutters as he easily slides two fingers into your dripping pussy.
“Oh God...fuck!”
“I’m gonna destroy this perfect little cunt, Hummingbird,” he promises as he fucks you faster with his fingers.
“Please,” is all you can get out as you grip his hair.
He resumes his assault on your clit with his tongue, before pulling on it with his lips and sucking on it. You grip his shoulder tight as you try and hang on and ignore all of the voices in your head telling you this is a terrible idea.
You know it’s a terrible idea, for a million reasons, but right now you just need him. You’ve been without his touch for so long and now, you just need his love. You need him to make you feel okay, because everything is happening so fast at once.
“I’m so fucking...ah, ah, AH SHIT!” you cry out as you coat the lower half of his face and fingers with your release.
“I’ve missed you, Hummingbird, and God, you still get so fucking wet for me,” he husks as he removes his fingers and sucks your essence off of them. The groan that leaves his mouth somehow makes you even more feral. “Take that fucking shirt off, let me see you,” demands softly as he takes off his own shirt.
Who the hell are you to disobey?
Instantly, you’re taking off your shirt and bra, and you can’t help but feel a little prideful at the way he marvels at you. After all this time, he still looks at you as if he’s never seen anymore more beautiful in his life.
“Gonna make you feel so good, Hummingbird,” he promises as he grips you tight and whips you onto the bed.
“I need you. I always fucking need you,” you whimper as you undo his belt buckle, getting fed up when you can’t stop fumbling with the damn thing, so you just force them down.
“Do you still love me?” he asks as thrusts himself inside of you, never breaking eye contact with you.
“Fuck!” you gasp, grabbing at nothing as relish in the pleasurable sting you’ve gone so long without. “It’s only ever been you for me! I’ll love you forever!”
“I love you, Hummingbird,” he broods as he fucks you harder and faster.
You feel like you’re on a cloud. Yes, you’ve had other relationships and hookups since Lloyd, but no one knows your body like he does. He knows all the right angles, what positions make you wild for him, and how to get you where you’re always desperate to be.
Lloyd knows you better than everyone else in every way.
“Don’t know how I’ve gone so long without you,” he groans as he pins your hands above your head, entwining his fingers with yours.
“I...I love you so much,” you whimper as you wrap your legs around him, grinding your hips against his. “On...only one for me!”
“Taking me so fucking well...fuck, this is still the best little snatch, baby! So fuckin’ wet!” he mumbles as he forces himself upright and forces himself deeper.
“OH MY GOD!”
“Fuck! Squeezing me so damn tight!”
“Lloyd...I...I...holy shit!” you cry out with tears streaming down your face as you turn your head away.
“Look me, Hummingbird,” he demands gruffly, “wanna see your fucking face when you...fuck!”
“Please...need to...need to- FUCK!” you scream as you squirt hard and you pray this isn’t the first thing Travis hears if hes woken up.
“JESUS...FUCK!” Lloyd exclaims as he fills you, collapsing on top of you, releasing your hands as you wrap your arms around him.
Fuck, you’ve missed him.
“You tired?” he asks as he sits up and you both catch your breaths.
“Not even close.”
“Such a good girl,” he smirks as he pulls out and flips you over, “cause we’re just getting started.”
Two fucking fools.
Once again, you know it’s a terrible idea, but you can’t and don’t want to stop. For as terrible as he is, Lloyd has always been your home. He’s always understood you, always accepted you as you are, always loved you, and has never made you feel less than. In his world, no one is worth saving or loving. No one except you. Besides the fact that he can easily give you orgasm after orgasm, he’s your person. He’s your person and your best fucking friend. Nothing feels right until Lloyd’s back in your life.
He’s nothing but chaos, but he’s the only way your world makes any sense.
“Daddy...too much! Can’t-”
“Yes you can,” he grunts as he fucks you hard from behind, slapping your ass, hard. “This bed has never been so fucking wet!”
“Please...need to...oh my GOD, don’t fucking stop!” you whimper as you strangle the pillows.
Well, the ones that are left.
“Still such a filthy little thing! Still a dirty little Hummingbird?”
“Only for you, daddy!”
“Fuck! Go ahead, fucking make a mess!”
“JESUS!” you scream as your arms give out and you make a mess for him, just like he loves.
“Good fuckin’ girl,” he praises as he fills you, pulling out just to watch the mixture of your juices run down your leg. “Best little cream hole.”
“Lloyd,” you whine as you lay down.
“I know, you’re tired, Hummingbird,” he coos as he smooths his hand over your ass before slapping it again.
“Daddy!”
“We’re done, I promise,” he laughs as he gets off the bed, “I’ll take care of you.”
He goes into the bathroom and you get comfortable as you settle under the covers, ignoring how wet the sheets are because of you.
“You okay?” he asks, coming back with a wet towel so he can clean you up.
He came on every part of your body, so it’s honestly the least he can do.
“It’s been a while, but I can still handle you, Hansen,” you giggle as you try and keep your eyes open.
“Sleep,” he urges as he gets in bed next to you and holds you close.
“You’re not sleeping.”
“I have work to do.”
“I’ll work with you.”
“You’ll never stop being stubborn, will you?”
“Nope,” you smile as he starts laughing. “That’s why you love me, Huckleberry.”
“And I’ll never stop.”
“Thank you, Lloyd. For coming home early and...being here-”
“The fact that you have to thank me for that proves just how much of terrible-”
“Stop it, Lloyd,” you hum as you lay your head on his chest. “Even if you weren’t always the best husband, you are the best Father. I love you.”
“You need to rest.”
“You need to rest.”
“I will. For now, just take a nap, at most.”
“You’re a good Father, Lloyd. You’re a good man,” you promise with a yawn.
“Sleep.”
As you rest, once again feeling safe and loved, you hope you’re providing for him the same feeling he gives you.
You hope that he feels the same peace you do.
**
Lloyd’s P.O.V
“How’d they get the Virgin Mary to leave her dorm?” I laughed as I stumbled a little, approaching you with his red Solo cup in hand.
“Leave me alone, Hansen,” you slurred as you leaned against the counter to stay upright.
“Well, the poet-”
“Lloyd, I am not like every other girl here. I’m not impressed with all the shit you can quote from dead old guys. Go...go away.”
“Let me impress you with something else then,” I smirked before I got on my knees and lifted up your dress.
“Lets see if that tongue is as impressive as all the girls say,” you shrugged before you took a sip of your drink.
The challenge was more than accepted.
Before you could bitch about me ripping your panties off my tongue fucking that perfect little honeypot between your legs.
“Oh fuck!”
And I’ve been addicted ever since.
I half expected you to stop me. Yeah, you were drunk, but that didn’t change the fact that you hated me. The fact that you actually let me eat you out in the kitchen at a frat party, blew my fucking mind. Letting me carry you up the stairs into my room?
I was sure I was dreaming.
“Oh my God!” you moaned as I fucked into relentlessly. “Never felt so fucking...never felt so fucking good! Never felt so full!” you whimpered as you clawed at my back.
“Yeah? Never been stretched this good?” I chuckled as I looked at this blissed out mess that you were.
“N-no, daddy! Oh...feels so...fuck, LLOYD!” you cried out as you came hard, messing up my sheets, and I had no choice but to follow your lead.
You and that fucking pussy of yours.
“I’m gonna go,” you panted after a moment.
Usually that would’ve been fine with me, but I waited so fucking long for you and before I could stop myself-
“Just stay. You’re too drunk and you’re already in a bed-”
“Can’t-”
“No point in leaving, Hummingbird,” I shrugged as if it was no big deal.
It’s funny to me to this day that you’ve never asked about that nickname, you just accepted it. Yeah, later on, I found out you love hummingbirds, but that had nothing to do with the nickname.
It was one of the first things that attracted me to you.
You were so fucking quiet in High School. You never said a thing unless you were around your friends or teachers called on you, and made sure to keep it that way no matter what.
You hummed a lot though.
Whether it was something you came up with, or your favorite song, you were always humming. You tried to keep it to yourself, but if anyone listened close enough, they’d hear you.
I always heard you.
It’s not like I ever fucking meant to pay attention to you, but once you had my attention...that was the end of it. There was no point in talking to you when we were in High School, because I already knew you wouldn’t give me the time of day. I figured we’d run into each other whenever either of us came home from college and I’d make my move then. So, imagine my fucking surprise when we got into the same damn college.
Maybe that’s why I worked so damn hard. College was a fresh start, but you were already wise to my bullshit and that’s fair. However, I wanted you and I wasn’t about to give up. Then, I saw you dancing with Tina in the living room and you looked so fucking happy and carefree. You looked so fucking perfect so, of course, I was determined to destroy every part of the goodness in you.
My plan was to fuck you and leave you begging and desperate, but that’s not what happened, is it? You made me beg for you and it pissed me the fuck off.
I woke up and you were gone.
Granted, you’re the only person I’ve had to chase after or even wanted to, but of course it made me want you more. You didn’t need or want a single fucking thing from me, you weren’t impressed by my football status, you didn’t care about my grades, and you sure as fuck didn’t care about the fact that every woman on campus wanted me. You truly were solely focused on your schoolwork.
So, of course, I had to fuck that up after going too long without your attention.
That was the problem though, wasn’t it?
After only one night, I needed more of it. More of you. I tried to not think about you, how you felt, the sounds that left your mouth, or the way you held onto me like your life depended on it. I tried to to not need you, but after two weeks without, I knew I was fucked. Hell, I knew it after the first damn day.
So, I talked you into a date. God, you were so fucking annoying about it.
“I’ll pick you up at 6 and we’ll head over to-”
“I hope you don’t think we’re leaving this fucking campus,” you scoffed as you started to pack up your books.
“Why the fuck would you want our first date-”
“I don’t care about how much fucking money you have, Lloyd. You want my attention? Earn it. Fancy restaurants and a nice car aren’t going to get you anywhere with me, Huckleberry,” you smirked at me. “See you at the cafeteria on Friday at 6,” you stated plainly before walking away.
Of course you made me work for it. It was stupid for me to think this would be simple, because if it had been, I wouldn’t have wanted you. From day one, you’ve always been a challenge and I’m nothing but a fucking sucker for a good challenge.
However, soon enough, you became more than that to me. Before I knew it, my entire life revolved around you. I needed you by my side on campus, I needed you cheering me on at football games, I needed your opinion on everything, I needed to be in your space at all times...
I was in love with you.
I never imagined falling in love, because I never believed in it. Yeah, my parents have been married for over 30 years, but it’s a sham. They’re both equally terrible to each other, so why the hell should I believe anything between them is real? So, when it came to you, I was skeptical, because why wouldn’t I be?
To this day, I still find it funny how much you didn’t wanna love me back. You tried to fight it so hard, but every date I asked you on (and I stress asked you on, because you were such a fucking brat about it), you never turned down. Soon enough, you were just as in love with me as I was with you. That makes me the asshole though, doesn’t it though?
I never told you that I had been talking to Denny about the CIA since Freshman year. Every time I tried, we were having a good day. The little trips I would surprise you with, the impromptu study sessions I couldn’t get you to take a break from, the weekend dinners with your parents...there was just never a good time.
Then, I finally told you, and it was a fucking shit show.
“Where are you going?” I sighed as you got out of my bed.
“Back to my fucking dorm, like I told you.”
“Hummingbird-”
“We fucked, Lloyd. We fucked like we always do, it doesn’t change shit.”
“I don’t see what you’re so fucking mad-”
“YOU COMPLETE ASSHOLE!” you shouted at me, finally looking at me, “I fucking love you and you know that! And what does that love get me? A sociopathic asshole!
“Do you want me to pull you back into bed and-”
“We can’t fuck this problem away, Lloyd! You kept this from me and now-”
“You know that I’m more than capable-”
“I LOVE YOU! YOU FORCED YOUR WAY INTO MY LIFE AND I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I HAVE LOVED ANYTHING OR ANYONE....you know what? Fuck you. You’re a fucking piece of shit and you can go fuck yourself,” you scoffed as you toed on your sandals.
It’s not like you were wrong.
“You know that I’d never-”
“Lloyd, I can’t have this argument with you and I don’t fucking feel like it. You wanna fucking join the CIA? Then go ahead.”
“Why are you-”
“You piece of shit! What if you get seriously hurt?! What if you don’t make it back to me?! You expect me to just be okay? You think I’ll just live on and love again? Fuck you!”
“Don’t be so fucking dramatic!”
“I swear, I fucking hate you!” you yelled before storming out.
That should’ve been enough, shouldn’t it? I should’ve thrown it all away and made you the center of my world, but you’re right.
It’s never enough for me.
I got you to forgive and then marry me, and it was the happiest moment of my life at the time. I should’ve told Denny I wasn’t going to join him, but that wouldn’t have been in my nature, would it? Since I knew you weren’t leaving, I ignored what you wanted. I knew I could keep you safe, so I did whatever I wanted. Of course I noticed you getting fed up with my shit, but I was always able to reel you back in, so it didn’t phase me.
I was getting my way and that’s what mattered.
Then you got pregnant.
“Jesus, I know I don’t matter to you, Lloyd, but-”
“Fuck you! You know you’re my entire world!”
“Yeah okay,” you scoffed as you poured yourself a glass of orange juice, “it’s not just about me anymore though-”
“I’ve kept you safe for all these years-”
“We’re having a fucking baby, Lloyd! We are bringing a child into this world! You can’t always-”
“I’ll never let anything happen to you or our child!”
“Whatever,” you laughed as you opened the door to the patio. “Keep fucking thinking you’re God for as long as you want, but you’re fucking us all over in the end. Fuck you.”
Of course you ended up being right, because fuck you.
Travis was born and he was perfect. How could he not be? He’s a fucking Hansen. At first, everything was perfect and you seemed to calm down a bit. Then, my missions got more dangerous, you couldn’t go out when you wanted, Travis rarely ever left the house, and then came the great debate of him being home schooled.
“You’ve lost your fucking mind if you think our son is being fucking home schooled,” I chuckled incredulously.
“What else do you want?! If I can barely leave the house-”
“He needs to have some sense of normalcy!”
“I swear to God! I can’t go to the fucking grocery store without someone fucking watching me, but our son can happily go to Kindergarten? What fucking sense does that make to you, Lloyd?!”
“I’m fucking trying-”
“No, if you were trying, you’d quit your fucking job!”
“Don’t start that shit!”
“I’m tired of excuses! I’m tired of all this-”
“Mama!” Travis called from his bedroom, and I could tell he was having one of his night terrors.
“I’ll go-”
“He said ‘Mama’, ‘not absentee Father’,” you sighed as you put your wine glass down.
“That’s not fair!”
“Don’t,” you laughed as you walked away from me, “don’t fucking try and tell me about what’s fair and what isn’t. You made me love you just enough to accept a life that’s total and complete bullshit.”
That’s when it started to fall apart. Two fucking miscarriages? Those arguments are starting to make a lot more fucking sense.
“Lloyd, you were gone for almost a month. Travis still young! You can’t just keep-”
“Can you not use our son as a weapon against me?! Besides, why stay around when you refuse to try again for another child?!”
“Fucking watch it!” he growled as you reached for a wine glass.
“All you fucking do is drink wine and smoke! You’re fucking moody or crying all the fucking time-”
“Lloyd, I swear to God!” you screamed, as you opened the bottle and almost filled your glass. “Shut your fucking mouth about shit you don’t fucking know about!”
“Well, if you’d just fucking talk to me-”
“YOU’RE NEVER FUCKING HERE ANYMORE!” you screamed before you stormed out.
The sleeping in separate rooms, not talking to one another, arguments over the dumbest things, finding reasons to avoid one another...
I was losing you.
I couldn’t really blame you though, could I? Because it was all me. I was the one unwilling to compromise, because I need to be in control all the time. So, I pretended that I didn’t see the issues, and pretended to not understand that I was the fucking problem. Then, my pretending turned into resentment, because how could it not? You were the only person in my life to make me feel any normalcy or love, and then you just took it from me. You took it like it was nothing.
So, since you hurt me, I had no choice but to hurt you.
Yeah, I remembered what you said about cheating, but I was so sure that I could get you to stay, because I always could in the past. I never wanted you to leave, I just wanted to grab your attention again. I hated every second of it, because she wasn’t you.
She wasn’t my home.
For all my clever thinking, I knew it was over the second I walked through the door. The look on your face let me know that you were still hurting from our last argument, and you didn’t even look a little excited to see me. However, I’ve never lied to you and I wasn’t about to start then.
I was so angry with you for filing for the divorce, because I didn’t want to acknowledge that it was my fault. Nothing can ever be my fault because I’m a god, right?
So, because you refused to back down, I of course had to be a piece of shit about it. I knew the phone calls and texts were hurting you, but I told myself it was worth it because you hurt me. Because I’m a selfish fuck, and that’s a fact that’s not lost on either of us. I would see it in your eyes when you would drop Travis off, but you’ve always been too good for me and never said anything.
Then you started dating.
“So, you’re just bringing our son around anyone?” I bit once Travis ran into your house.
“I don’t wanna argue with you, Lloyd,” you sighed, clearly tired of the back and forth we constantly went through. “How was he this week?”
“You’re dating a fucking lawyer?”
“It’s only been two dates. Why are you having me followed?”
“So that I know you’re safe.”
“Lloyd, you can’t keep doing this-”
“Just come back to-”
“I’m sorry, didn’t you call me last week so I could hear you fucking two other women? Hearing you command them and telling them what positions you wanted them in?”
“You know-”
“I don’t tell you how to live your fucking life, even when you go out of your way to hurt me, so don’t start telling me I can’t try to fucking move on,” you snapped as your eyes started to water.
Why can’t I ever put my fucking ego and pride aside? Why do I always have to hurt the one person who makes living worth while?
“Are you seeing him again?”
“It’s really not any of your business. Now, how was Travis?”
“He wants to know when his Mother became such a fucking whore.”
“God, you are such an asshole! See you next fucking week!” you cried before you slammed the door shut.
As always, I took it too far.
“What?” you sobbed when you answered the phone later that night.
I’m such a fucking asshole.
“I’m sor-”
“Save it, Lloyd. You always go out of your way to hurt me, then fucking apologize.”
“I love you.”
“Don’t. Just don’t, okay? I am trying my hardest to get all of this shit right, you’re always going on some fucking mission-”
“I miss you.”
“You can’t keep doing this to me, Lloyd,” you sobbed. “I’m not some fucking toy that you can just play with-”
“Just come back to me, I’ll make changes-”
“Will you quit your job?”
“Hummingbird-”
“If you’re not quitting, we really don’t have anything else to discuss.”
“We have everything left to discuss.”
“Why is that?”
“Because I’m your Huckleberry and I love you.”
“Then why don’t you treat me better?” you asked before you hung up.
It’s not like it wasn’t a fair fucking question. You give me everything and I give you bare minimum. It’s not lost on me that you’re more than I deserve, but if I could just stop trying to control everything all the fucking time...stop trying to control you, this could work. I can’t though, can I? There are just parts of me that won’t change. Not really for lack of trying, but it’s embedded into my system at this point.
I couldn’t stop myself from looking into the guys you were dating, secretly threatening them, and watching what you were up to. No, I never told you, but I knew you knew you. The scowl on your face whenever you saw me let me know that you knew. It’s not like you ever said anything to stop it though, so you clearly didn’t have a problem with it. We’re complete fucking fools for one another, so knowing that I was desperate for and needed you, made you just as happy as it made to know that you were still in love with me.
Even if you refused to say it out loud.
It’s not like you ever took getting back together off the table, you still wear the Hummingbird necklace I got you after our third date, and I know that you love me just as much as I love you. If I can get my shit together, I know you’ll take me back, but I need you to compromise. It’s not fair to ask of you, but I can’t just give all of this up. It’s the only thing that keeps me normal around you. Yeah, you accept me flaws and all, but you deserve better.
I want you to have better.
“What?” I ask as a soft knock breaks me out of my thoughts.
I know I told you I was going to work, but leaving your side...it’s been so long since I’ve had you like this, and I just can’t pull myself away from you until I have to.
“They found the guys,” a mercenary tells me as he opens the door softly.
“Alive or dead?”
“Alive. They’re in the cellar.”
“I’ll be down there in a minute.”
As I go to get out of bed, your grip on me gets tighter, “It’s okay, Hummingbird.”
“Where..what’s going on?”
“You sleep. We’ll talk about it later.”
“Travis-”
“He hasn’t woken up.”
“Lloyd-”
“Rest, Hummingbird,” I encourage before I press a kiss into your hair.
“I love you, Lloyd,” you tell me lazily.
“I love you too, Hummingbird.”
In a matter of seconds, you’re back to sleep and it makes me melt all over again. I know we’re not together anymore, and I know it’s my fault, but having you like this...I’m going going to fix all of this.
First, I’m going to make sure Travis is okay, then I’m gonna make you mine again.
I’ll never lose you again.
**
Y/N’s P.O.V
You’re awoken by your phone buzzing on the floor. You roll around for a bit, trying to regain consciousness, before feeling around on the floor for your pants, and fishing your phone out of your pocket.
Tina.
In all the chaos, you’d forgotten all about what Lloyd said. You checked the time and saw that it was 10pm, and you’re sure shes been calling you for a while.
You take a deep breath before answering, “hey.”
“Hey is everything okay?! I’ve been calling-”
“Yeah no, I’m just exhausted. I’m honestly even sure what day it is at this point.”
“I can come over another day-”
“No, it’s fine. You seemed like you really needed to talk to me.”
“Yeah, I’ll head over now-”
“I’m at Lloyd’s. He feels better having both Travis and I close after everything.”
“Oh,” is all she responds with.
God, please don’t let Lloyd be right about this.
“I’ll let him know you’re coming by. Do you remember the address?”
“Yeah, I’ll see you in a bit,” she responds softly before hanging up.
Fuck.
You’re slow to get dressed as you go over what happened just a few hours ago, and what’s about to happen. How can so much happen in such little time? Literally everything was fine and then in an instant, your entire world is flipped upside down and falling apart.
And how did you respond? By fucking your ex-husband.
What now? You know him well enough to know that this isn’t going to be a one and done kind of thing. It’s not like he didn’t know that you never stopped loving him, but now you’ve let him in again. Physically, emotionally, and intimately. So, he’s gonna try and work his way back in, which isn’t even the main issue. The real issue is that you want to let him back in.
You’ve missed him so damn much and he’s been amazing (for the most part) about handling all that’s going on. You want to fall asleep in his arms again, you want his kisses to wake you up in the morning, you want everyone in one fucking house again, you want to be with your soulmate again.
Being with Lloyd is the only thing that makes you feel sane.
There’s his job though. He’s not going to quit, and it’s clearly not getting any safer. It’s not lost on you that Travis is across the hall fighting for his life, because someone wanted revenge on Lloyd. However, it’s also not lost on you how much more protective he’s going to be over the both of you now.
Why can’t any of this shit be easy?
To make everything all that much more complicated, even if it turns out that Tina isn’t responsible for the hell you’re currently in, Lloyd has decided that she is and he isn’t going to change his mind. From the tone in her voice, you already know she’s coming over with a fully loaded gun, and the last thing you need is for a fucking gunfight to break out where your child is currently laying unconscious. Something you wouldn’t put past either of them, because when they’re both angry enough, they’re both unreachable.
And Lloyd is way past furious.
You scoff when you notice all the feathers all over the floor from one of the pillows you both destroyed. In your defense, if he hadn’t been fucking you completely senseless, while biting and sucking on the hollow part of your neck (which he knows makes you crazy), then you wouldn’t have started clawing at the pillows so fucking hard.
You quietly exit the room and make your way to Travis’ room, where he’s still unconscious.
“Has there been any change at all?” you ask the new doctor sitting next to his bedside.
The one who gave Lloyd her card. Great.
“No, but that’s not a bad thing. His vital signs are good and nothings happened to cause any alarm. We just have to wait and see when he’ll wake up.”
“If he’ll wake up,” you sigh as you walk over to the bed and take his hand in yours, “I love you, sweetie. Your Dad and I love you so much,” you promise softly, fighting back tears. “I’ll be back in a bit to check on him,” you nod towards to the doctor as you let go of Travis’ hand.
With that, you leave the room and close the door behind you. You want the both of them to hear as little as possible.
Once you’re finally downstairs, you only see half the mercenaries in the living area, which means work is being done. You look out the window and see that Lloyd’s car is still home, because he likes to drive himself when he’s angry. He likes to piss people off while driving, so they’ll get out and wanna fight, and he beats the shit out of them and gets his anger out that way.
Like you’ve told him before, it’s not lost on you that he’s a lunatic.
But where the hell is he? You know he wouldn’t do anything in the backyard, and it’s not even because he’s afraid of someone seeing. It would get too messy, and it’ll drive him insane. Same with the garage. Lloyd needs everything to be clean and neat at all times.
Well, almost at all times.
“Where’s Lloyd?” you finally ask one of the mercenaries.
“He told us-”
“Where is he?” you demand more than ask again, cocking an eyebrow.
“He’s...uh...he’s...”
“You know, you really have to ask yourself, how crazy someone has to be to marry Lloyd Hansen. What could they be capable of?” you warn with a growl. “Now, where is he?”
“He’s downstairs, in the cellar,” the poor man quickly explains as he points towards the direction it’s in.
Since when has there been a fucking cellar? Then again, it has been a few years since you’ve been in this house.
“Thank you,” you smile sweetly before turning and making your way to the door.
The second you open it, you can tell that a lot of people have been killed down here. It’s the one part of the house that isn’t painted, the lights are flickering, the walls are stone, there’s no carpeting, it’s cold, and they’re dried blood smears on the wall.
It’s downright terrifying.
The closer you get to the bottom step, the more you regret your decision to search for Lloyd. Yes, you know what he does for a living, but this is the first time you’ve actually seen this part of his life. While hes never hidden anything from you (since you chewed him out in college), hes also never shown you this side of him. The unhinged side? Yes. The murdering side? No.
You quickly start making your way down the hall, and the closer you get to the end of it, the louder the grunts become. As you walked past the other closed doors, you don’t even want to begin to think about what goes on in them.
“You know,” you hear Lloyd chuckle menacingly, “my torture process is usually a lot worse than this, but making you bleed is just too damn fun.
“Please-”
“Where the fuck is Andrew?!” he shouts, and you’re more than sure hes punched the man in the face.
Jesus.
You knock softly on the door and get me with a gruff, “What?!”
“It’s me” you respond softly.
“Be right back, Pork Chop,” you hear Lloyd breathe.
Soon enough, he’s opening the door and you the sight of him has you wet almost instantly. His hair is wild and some of it matted to his forehead, his knuckles are covered in blood, he’s breathing heavy, they’re beads of sweat on his forehead, and he’s dressed tight fitting all black clothes, with black loafers to match.
The fact that he also looks so wild and feral has you ready to jump on him and fuck him in front of everyone. Maybe you are just as unhinged as him.
“Is everything okay, Hummingbird?” he asks softly as he cleans off his hands with a white cloth.
What the hell did you come down here for? Oh, yeah, that.
“Tina is on her way here.”
“Talk to her down here in that room,” he sighs, pointing at the room two doors down.
“Lloyd-”
“I know I’ve done things that have hurt you in the past, but its never been anything on this scale. I wouldn’t do this if I wasn’t sure. I don’t want to take anything else from you, but she has to go. I can’t forgive this. The only reason she isn’t dead yet is out of courtesy towards you,” he mutters, fury burning in his eyes.
“She’ll want to know why I wanna talk to her down here.”
“Tell her it’s in case you two start yelling at each other. This cellar is soundproof.”
“Lloyd...are you sure?”
“Do you trust me?”
“I always have.”
“Then trust me on this,” he assures you softly.
You can’t help but find it funny that he can switch his attitude so fast when you’re around.
“How will you know...?”
“They’re a million little tricks I’ve put down here. I won’t be far at all.”
“Just...let her at least explain her side of it. Hear her out and then, if you still think...”
“Hummingbird-”
“Lloyd, please. I’ve been through hell these last few hours? Days? I can barely tell which way is up at this point. If you’re going to kill my best friend, I at least want her to have a fair chance,” you sigh.
“Fine,” he agrees begrudgingly.
You resist the urge to kiss him before going to leave, when he grabs your wrist, pulls you close, and kisses you passionately.
You swear you can kiss him all fucking day.
“I’ll be close by, okay?” he breathes once you two break apart, before turning his attention to back to everyone else in the room.
You honestly forgot about them.
“Hook the cables up to his chair,” he demands, his tone authoritative and menacing like he hadn’t sweet with you seconds ago. “If I can’t beat an answer out of him, maybe I can freeze it out him. I want it on the highest setting until I get back, you understand me?”
“Yes, Mr. Hansen,” one of the mercenaries answer, “what about the other man?”
“See if survived the waterboarding. If he did, see if you can get him to talk. If he won’t, break his ankles and shoot him in his knee caps,” Lloyd shrugs before closing the door.
Of all the times for you to be turned on.
“I’m sure she’ll be here soon, Hummingbird. You should get upstairs.”
“Lloyd, you promise-”
“I swear to you, I’ll be fucking fair. You may not like the outcome, but I’ll wait and hear her out.”
“Thank you.”
Your heart is heavy as you turn and start on your way back down the hall and up the stairs. You believe Lloyd when he says you’ll hear her out, but when he’s this sure about something, you know it’ll take a miracle to change his mind. If he were the one who got attacked because of her actions, he truly wouldn’t care, but hes always known how to outsmart her and hit her where it hurts. However, it was an attack on you and Travis, and he’s having a hard time not seeing red.
As soon as you reach the top step, you hear the doorbell.
Here we go.
“Hey,” she greets you with a warm smile and a hug, which return, since it’ll probably be the last one you ever give her. “How’s Travis?”
“There hasn’t been a change, the doctor is upstairs with him right now.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
“For now, it’s just a waiting game,” you smile weakly. “Lets have this talk down in the cellar. Lloyd’s working down there anyway, so he’s not gonna be around, and it’s soundproof. If we start yelling, and I have a feeling we will, I don’t want everyone hearing. One of the mercenaries might tell Lloyd, and he’s already hot headed-”
“When isn’t he?” she scoffs.
“Tina.”
“I’m sorry, that was a low blow. His son is...I’m sorry,” she sighs. “Lets go,” she smiles weakly.
You two make your way down the steps in silence, and when you reach the room Lloyd told you to go to, you hear gun shots followed by the most agonizing scream you’ve ever heard.
Guess that guy didn’t talk.
“So, what’s up? What happened?” you ask as she closes the door behind the both of you.
“Just...we’ve been through a lot, Y/N. So, please just hear me out.”
Fucking great.
“What happened, Tina?” you sigh, your hands on your hips because you’re already exhausted.
“What happened to Travis....what almost happened to you...it wasn’t supposed-”
“The fuck does that mean?!”
“They weren’t supposed to go after you! Lloyd was the fucking target and they had been tailing him. He was supposed to be back on the day that everything happened, but when he wasn’t back, they decided to-”
“Are you fucking shitting me?! WHAT THE FUCK?!”
“It wasn’t...listen, how much do you know about Prague?”
“Lets not fucking talk about Prague,” you laugh incredulously as you start to pace.
“I’m sorry, but if we don’t, you won’t get it-”
“I’m never going to get it, because you know how much I love him! You saw how I reacted when-”
“He killed Suzanne!”
“Tina, you better be fucking kidding me,” you scoff in disbelief. “You wanted the love of my life killed, because he killed your revenge girlfriend?!”
“She wasn’t-”
“Don’t fucking say she wasn’t! You started dating Suzanne to get back at Denny! You couldn’t stand her just as much he couldn’t! She tried to kill Lloyd, and almost did, and he killed her instead! It’s his fault that he’s good at his job?! You saw how broken up I was when he almost died! All the hell I went through, the panic attacks, the sleepless nights, trying to take care of Travis-”
“Lloyd killed a girl-”
“BECAUSE IT WAS HIS JOB!” you shout at her. “Jesus, I know that he’s a prick, but you and I both know that when it comes to work, he does what needs to be done no matter how bad he may or may not feel about it later. It’s not like he goes out of his fucking way to kill kids! No, this is about your fucking bruised ego. Denny fell out of love with you, Lloyd kicked you out of his office when you got hysterical, and you felt humiliated. Did you forget that I’m your best fucking friend and you told me all of this?!”
“Y/N-”
“So what? You put out a hit on him and it fucking backfired? No surprise there,” you mutter.
“Don’t be fucking cruel!”
“I’m sorry, my son is fighting for his life and I was almost killed! YOU DON’T GET TO TELL ME NOT TO BE CRUEL!”
“Y/N-”
“What happened, Tina?!”
“I met Andrew at bar and I had seen him around because of work,” she sighs, running an exasperated hand through her hair. “We had a few drinks, we got to talking, and we realized that we have a common enemy-”
“Lloyd. You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” you laugh humorlessly.
“I only gave him Lloyd’s information and he had his guys follow him around-”
“Tina...fuck you,” you laugh, “fuck you for all of this!”
“He was supposed to be-”
“YOU SAW ALL OF THE HELL I WENT THROUGH! AND YOU WERE GOING TO PUT ME THROUGH IT ALL OVER AGAIN?!”
“HE ISN’T GOOD FOR YOU OR TRAVIS!”
“YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE THAT! YOU DON’T KNOW HOW HE IS WITH HIM! YOU DON’T KNOW HOW HE IS WITH ME BEHIND CLOSED DOORS! YOU DON’T KNOW!”
“YOU WANNA BE WITH SOMEONE WHO MURDERS CHILDREN?!”
“IT IS HIS FUCKING JOB! YOU DON’T GET TO SIT HERE AND LECTURE ME ABOUT SHIT WHEN YOU’VE CRIED TO ME ABOUT ALL THE INNOCENT PEOPLE YOU’VE HAD TO KILL! I MARRIED HIM, I HAD A CHILD WITH HIM, HE OWNS MY HEART AND SOUL, AND BECAUSE OF SOME PETTY FUCKING VENDETTA, WHERE HE DIDN’T ACTUALLY DO ANYTHING WRONG, YOU WERE...GOD! I HATE WHEN HE’S FUCKING RIGHT! I FUCKING HATE YOU FOR THIS, TINA!” you scream as your tears start to fall. “Do you understand that Travis might die?! He may not ever be able to walk again, we don’t what his memory will be like if he wakes up...he almost died because of-”
“Y/N...babe, I’m sorry...I didn’t think-”
“No, you didn’t fucking think! Did you forget that you had to keep Travis for two weeks because I wasn’t even capable of cooking?! YOU WERE GOING TO DO THAT TO ME AGAIN OVER A PETTY DISAGREEMENT-
“I WOULD HAVE BEEN THERE-”
You don’t even jump when the gun goes off from the side of the room. You just breathe heavily as she falls to the ground and try to feel something. Your best friend not only betrayed you, but is also the reason why your son is fighting for his life, and shes been killed right before your eyes and yet...
You feel nothing.
“If it makes you feel any better, I really wanted to be wrong,” Lloyd sighs as he wraps his arms around your waist from behind.
“I don’t feel anything. I’m all out of fucking feelings,” you mutter, leaning against him because leaving his side seems impossible at the moment. “Have either of those guys said anything yet?”
“I haven’t gone back in-”
“I want to go in with you.”
“Hummingbird-”
“I wasn’t asking.”
Lloyd lets out a heavy sigh but nonetheless, presses a soft kiss into your hair before taking your hand and leading you out of the room. You take one last look at Tina’s dead body before he closes the door. You hear him clear his throat as he places his gun back into the waist of his pants.
“You sure, Hummingbird?”
“I just saw my best friend get killed. I’m pretty fucking sure I can handle two pieces of shit who tried to kill my son.”
“Y/N, don’t be mad at me for-”
“I’m not mad at you, Lloyd. I’m truly not. I’m just fucking tired and I want this over with. I want Travis safe, I want you safe, and I want...I just want all of this to be over.”
“I know, Hummingbird. I promise, as soon as I find out what I need to, I’ll finish everything.”
“Then we should get in there.”
“I guess you’re right,” he sighs.
He pulls out his phone and sends a quick text before shoving it back in his pocket and leading you into the room.
“Looks like you’ve got a visitor...oh, you look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Lloyd chuckles as you close the door behind you two. “There’s a pathetic little thing lying on the floor in the other room. Get rid of her,” he commands to two of the mercenaries, before returning his gaze to the shivering man in the chair. “As for you-”
“Mr. Hansen-”
“I’m working!” he snaps.
“I understand, but the other guy...he’s gone.”
“I guess he really wasn’t a daisy,” Lloyd chuckles. “Get rid of him, he’s of no use to me now. Drop him into the bottom of the ocean, or chop him up and get rid of him in the tub, it really makes no difference to me,” he shrugs as he once again turns his attention to the man in the chair. “Do you wanna tell me where Andrew is, or do you wanna try out another form of torture?” Lloyd asks sarcastically as he takes out his pistol.
“Please, just-”
“Boring,” he sighs, rolling his eyes as he fires a shot into the guys arm. “Tell me what I want to know!”
“He’s gonna-”
“He’s not going to do anything I won’t do much worse! Now, tell me where the fuck-”
“Lloyd,” Denny interrupts as walks through the door, “we need you upstairs.”
“Denny-”
“It’s an update on Andrew. They just caught two guys trying to break-in. Committed suicide before we could get anything out of them, but they came with a note.”
Lloyd sighs and drops his head, “we keep getting interrupted, Pork Chop. I’ll be right back. Lets go, Humming-”
“I wanna stay in here,” you interrupt softly, which has Lloyd quickly turning all of his attention towards you. “What?”
“You go, I’ll stay.”
“Y/N-”
“I’m fine, Lloyd. You go, I’ll stay,” you repeat, not taking your eyes off of whimpering piece of shit in the chair.
Lloyd lets out another heavy sigh, but says nothing as he heads out and closes the door behind him.
“I don’t know why you’re crying, he’s taking it easy on you,” you shrug as you make your way over to the weapons table. “No, I’ve never seen him kill anyone, but I’ve also known him for a while now. He’s good at his job for a reason.”
“Please, I’m sorry-”
“No no, I talk and you listen,” you interrupt with a kind smile as you pick up Lloyd’s butterfly knife. “It’s not as sharp as it usually. He probably used it for work and never got the chance to sharpen it. Ya know, Lloyd fucks with his toys,” you chuckle. “I’ve been fucked with his guns, he would test out how strong his ropes were by tying me to the bed or tying me up and made sure that no matter how hard he fucked me I couldn’t get out, he liked to cut my underwear off with his knives, he has a bit of a blood kink so every once in a while he would “accidentally” cut me while cutting off my clothes. Lost a lot of cute underwear during our relationship,” you sigh as you shake your head.
“Ms. Diaz said-”
“Oh, Tina? She’s dead. Nothing she says holds any weight anymore,” you shrug as you make your way over to the guy. “You were so desperate to make your guy happy, and now look? Tied to a metal chair, freezing your balls off, crying like a bitch, all bloodied up, and your little buddy is dead,” you laugh as you stand in front of him. “Where’s Andrew?”
“I don’t know!”
“Lies irritate me,” you scowl before grabbing his hand and stabbing it.
“FUCK!”
“Where is Andrew?”
“I don’t-”
“Lying,” you sing as pull the knife out and start to cut off his fingers.
“I DON’T KNOW!”
“Lie, lie, lie,” you tsk as you add more pressure and cut the bone. “Where is he?”
“PLEASE!”
“Oh look, I took off two fingers,” you laugh as you toss them on the table. “I’m nowhere near as skilled as Lloyd is, so you’ll have to forgive me for that. Anyway, wanna keep this up? Or do you wanna tell me-”
“I WAS PROMISED-”
“Still not the answer I’m looking for,” you shrug as you start cutting his ear. “Now, where is?”
“LONDON! HE’S HIDING OUT IN LONDON! KNIGHTSBRIDGE, LONDON! THERE’S SOME HOUSE...IT’S FAMOUS HOME...HE’S THERE!” he wails as you cut through the last of his ear.
“Good boy,” you smile at him before kissing his forehead. “You stay here and someone will be down to see you soon,” you promise him sweetly as place his fingers and ear in a white cloth.
“Please...please...d-don’t kill-”
“Don’t kill you? Oh honey, that’s for Lloyd to decide,” you smile as you wrap up the cloth then make your way out.
You’ve never done anything like that in your life, and you never thought that you would, but your patience and discipline have all but dissolved. Your son still hasn’t woken up, your best friend is not only responsible for all of this but intentionally going after your soulmate, and now this asshole sends someone else to attack all of you?
The good girl is on leave right now.
“Lloyd, we’re at least able to narrow it down to two different-”
“I want an exact location!” Lloyd shouts at Denny, as you enter the kitchen. “He sent someone-”
“He’s in London,” you state flatly as you drop the cloth containing the fingers and ear on the table on the table. “Knightsbridge, London. He said it’s a famous home, so I have a good guess that it’s that place where they hosted Picasso.”
Both of them just look at you with pure shock and amazement in their eyes.
“Someone tried to kill my son. I want him gone. If you have more questions, I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to answer...if he’s still alive. I’m not a doctor, so I don’t know how these things work, but he was still begging when I left-”
“You did this?” Lloyd asks, trying to hide how turned on he is.
“That I did.”
“Come with me, lets talk to him together since you’re clearly more persuasive than I am. Denny,” he smirks as he turns his attention to his bewildered best friend, “give me about 20...30 minutes to have an exact location.”
“Lloyd-”
“It looks like I’m not the one calling the shots anymore,” he laughs as he gets up. “Lead the way,” he smiles at you.
He holds your hand as you lead him back down the steps, and for the entire short trip, you feel his eyes on you intensely. You know that he never thought you’d be capable of doing something, but he doesn’t hate the fact that he now knows that you are. If anything, it just makes him feel closer to you.
“You did this, Hummingbird?” Lloyd asks softly once you two are back in the room, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close. “You did so good,” he praises against your neck before kissing it.
Feeling him hard against your the back of thigh only makes you even more desperate for him.
“He doesn’t want you to kill him, daddy,” you moan as he teases kisses up and down your neck.
“He doesn’t want me to...that’s cute,” he laughs as he pulls out his pistol. “You’re gonna tell my Hummingbird whatever the fuck she wants to know.”
‘My Hummingbird’. God, you love the sound of that.
“I told her-”
“You didn’t give her an exact address,” he tuts as he shoots him in the leg.
In no time at all, Lloyd had more than all the information he needs, all the while teasing the shell of your ear with the tip his tongue.
“What do you think, Hummingbird?” he asks as he unbuttons your jeans with one hand, while the other is still pointing the gun at the blubbering mess, “should I let him live?”
“N-no daddy,” you moan as he slides his hands down your panties, his fingers quickly finding their mark and starting to tease you.
“P-please,” the man blubbers.
“Sorry,” Lloyd smirks against your neck, “you heard my Hummingbird.”
It’s embarrassing how hard you came when he pulled the trigger on his pistol.
“We have to stop,” you whimper as Lloyd continues to massage your clit with two fingers.
“Do we?” he husks before biting your earlobe. “I think we should keep it up.”
“Fuck!”
“You want me to beg? I can get on my knees right now-”
“Lloyd-Jesus Christ you two!” Denny scowls and you smile as you feel the rumble in Lloyd’s chest as he chuckles. “You need to get upstairs so we can plan how you wanna go about this.”
“Isn’t that why they call you the Chief?”
“This is your revenge, jackass,” Denny snaps back.
“Go,” you laugh softly, “I need to check on Travis anyway. I’ve been away far too long.”
“We can go together and then-”
“Lloyd,” you laugh, hating how good and loved hes making you feel.
“I’ll come up after, okay?”
“Sounds good-shit!” you moan as he removes his fingers.
“You’re sleeping in my bed tonight,” he chuckles before licking his fingers as he walks away.
Are you even sure this is your life anymore?
You scoff and shake your head as you look at the dead idiot in the chair, before you finally make your way out of what you can only call Hell. You’re still trying to wrap your head around what the hell has taken place over the last 2 days? 3 days?
When is the last time you ate? When’s the last time Lloyd ate?
As you make your way into the kitchen, you ignore everything that’s going on and start searching for menus, when you realize the time.
12am.
Looks like you’re cooking.
“You don’t have to cook,” Lloyd sighs as you start taking out pots and pans.
“We need to eat. I’m sure everyone needs to eat,” you chuckle humorlessly. “Though, I don’t know how the hell I’m going to feed everyone. How do you all feel about sandwiches?”
“Hummingbird, I’ll send for food and have it brought up to you-”
“It’s 12am, Lloyd.”
“What does that mean to me? Get upstairs and I’ll bring up some food to you when it gets here.”
“You don’t know what I want.”
“I always know what you want,” he smirks.
“Lloyd-”
“Jesus, I’ll feed you too, Denny. Calm down,” he scowls.
You laugh as you start to make your way out of the kitchen, but Lloyd grabs your wrist as you walk by and it tugs at your heart. You wrap an arm around him and kiss the top of his head before letting go and making your way into the living area and starting on your way up the stairs.
It’s not lost on you that you can’t just get back with Lloyd like nothings happened, but that doesn’t change the fact that you want to. You want to so bad that it’s actually starting to hurt. Yes, the last few days have been hell, but hes been by your side for all of it. Hes been by your side, hes been amazing, and all of it has made you realize why you fell in love with him in the first damn place.
He’s always going to be your Huckleberry.
“Am I allowed to lay on the bed with him?” you ask the doctor as you lean against the door frame of Travis’ room.
“Just be gentle,” she warns softly.
You ease into bed with him and grab the remote off the nightstand.
“I promised you ‘Tombstone’ and that’s what we’re gonna watch,” you tell him softly as you kiss the top of his head.
You settle in next to him and lay your head on his shoulder as you find ‘Tombstone’ on some streaming service, and start playing it. “Has there been any change?” you ask the doctor.
“Everything is the same,” she smiles softly.
Of course it is.
You give her a small smile and nod before focusing your attention back on the screen. As you sit and watch, a small smile comes to your first as you remember the first time you watched it.
“We’ve been dating for four months and you still haven’t watched it,” Lloyd grumbled as you two laid in his bed.
“Why do you want me to watch it so bad?” you laughed.
“Because it’s my favorite movie!”
“Lloyd, will it really make you that happy if I watch it?”
“I’ve been asking every damn day for the last two months, so yes, it will make me that happy, Hummingbird.”
“Jesus, alright. Put the damn thing in,” you laughed as Lloyd practically jumped out of the bed.
He talked through the whole damn movie.
“So, I’m guessing your Doc Holliday in all this?”
“Of course I am! He’s the most badass out of all of ‘em!”
“A fair point,” you laughed as you got up and started to get dressed.
“Where you going?”
“Back to my dorm, Huckleberry.”
“Stay the night.”
“I have spent the last three nights here and I can tell that Tina wants to hangout.”
“Who gives a fuck about Tina?”
“Clearly I do since she’s my best friend.”
“Go to breakfast with her tomorrow or something.”
“You can’t always get your way, Lloyd.”
“Why not?”
“Now now, don’t get all soft on me.”
“I would fall in love with someone who has a mind of her own,” he muttered before he could stop himself.
That made you freeze.
“Wh...what? What did you say?” you asked, slowly turning around to see that Lloyd was sitting straight up.
“Nothing.”
“Yes you did.”
“It doesn’t matter, because it’s not a big deal.”
“Then why don’t you want to say it again?”
“Hummingbird-”
“Did you mean it?”
“Yes.”
“Then say it again.”
He was quiet and his breathing got heavy before he finally repeated, “I love you.”
You were back on his bed and straddling him instantly. You cupped his face and kissed him passionately, while Lloyd wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close.
“Say it again,” you breathed once you two broke apart.
“I love you.”
“Are you just saying it because you want me to stay over?”
“Y/N, I have never said that to anyone. Maybe my parents on their birthdays. I have now told you a total of three times and we both know that they’re a million ways for me to get you to stay without admitting how I actually feel. I love you.”
“I love you, Lloyd,” you smiled before you took off your shirt.
“I thought you were gonna hangout with Tina tonight,” he smirked as flipped you over on your back.
“I’ll take her to breakfast.”
In all honesty, you stopped watching the damn movie because it became too painful. Remembering that moment and how perfect everything was, him telling you that he loved you for the first time...it was too much. For the longest time, you thought that Lloyd showed Travis the movie out of spite, because it’s not like he isn’t that much of an asshole, but then you really thought about it. The amount of people who know anything personal about Lloyd are three: Travis, you, and Denny, and you’re honestly not even sure if Denny knows that ‘Tombstone’ is his favorite movie because that would mean that someone besides you would know that Doc Holliday is his hero.
It would also mean that he’d have to admit that his whole ‘tough guy’ persona isn’t his own...well, the being a psycho part is 100% him.
“Your Dad holds his gun just like that,” you laugh softly to Travis, as you watch Doc Holliday, walk away from the barber who was trimming up his mustache.
“Don’t reveal my secrets to him,” Lloyd mutters as he enters the room, two containers in hand. “Besides, I don’t hold my gun behind my back, I hold it in front of me.”
“Yeah, but you still hold it the same way, and don’t reveal your secrets? Says the man who wanted to name him Doc, like that wouldn’t have been a dead give away,” you smirk.
“Lloyd,” the doctor smiles at him.
Of course hes fucked her.
“Has there been any change?” he asks you, completely ignoring the woman in the chair.
“He squeezed my hand a little, but he hasn’t opened his eyes.”
“That’s good, right? It means he’s showing signs of improvement?” he questions, eyes hopeful as he takes a seat next to you.
“It’s a very good sign,” the doctor smiles at him.
Maybe she should go to bed with him tonight.
“Shit! I missed the gun fight!” he scowls as he passes you a container of pasta.
“I can always rewind it, it’s not like you missed it by much,” you laugh as you grab the remote, “what poor soul did you bully into making this?”
“How do you know I didn’t make it?”
“Cause you can’t cook for shit,” you scoff as you rewind back to his favorite scene and he flips you off.
“My Mother made it.”
“Then take it back, cause she can’t cook for shit either.”
“Shes hired a chef and I’m more than sure it’s because of something my Father said.”
“Don’t tell me Stef is getting sensitive now...Lloyd, did this chef just start making food yesterday? This is terrible!” you cough as you spit it out and press play on the movie.
“She had to make this, cause this tastes awful!” he laughs as he takes your container away from you. “Jesus, I’ll get-”
“We’ll get something in the morning. We’ve gone this long without eating. Another couple hours won’t hurt us,” you shrug.
“Hummingbird-”
“We’ll get breakfast, I promise. Lets just finish the movie and go to bed. We both need rest, its been a long day,” you sigh.
“You did good today, Hummingbird,” Lloyd praises as rests his hand on your thigh.
“Thank you, Huckleberry,” you sigh, resting your hand on top of his.
Why can’t you two just work it out?
When the movie comes to an end, you both give Travis a kiss and tell him you’ll see him first thing in the morning, you tell the doctor goodnight and bids you a good night as well before giving Lloyd a suggestive smirk.
This is why you’ve got to stop fooling around with him.
“Burn this,” he tells one of the mercenaries as he passes him the two full containers.
“Goodnight, Lloyd,” you tell him softly as you make your way to the room you were supposed to sleep in last night.
“What do you...goodnight?”
“I’m going to bed, it’s been a long day and-”
“Don’t do this to me, Hummingbird. After last night...don’t make me sleep alone.”
“Lloyd.”
“Y/N, I can’t sleep without you in my arms and I know you can’t sleep without me by your side.”
Fuck.
“Lloyd,” you moan as he lays you down on the bed, quickly getting to work on the front of your jeans. “We have to...we’re not...fuck!” you sigh as he easily slides two fingers inside of you. “Feels so...shit! Lloyd!” you squeal when he starts massaging your clit with his thumb.
“You look so fucking good when you’re so desperate, Hummingbird,” he coos as your toes curl.
“Need it...need to fucking cum, please!” you whimper pathetically, clawing at the bed.
“So fucking gorgeous,” he whispers as he curls his fingers inside of you, finding that spot that makes you come alive for him and picking up his pace.
“Fuck!” you sob, coating his fingers with your release.
“Take off that shirt. It’s time to get you cleaned up,” he demands with a low growl, slowly removing his fingers then bringing them up to his lips.
“Lloyd-”
“You’ve been a good girl all day, don’t start acting up now,” he warns in the tone that makes you want to do any and every everything for him.
Why can’t you just stop?
“Fuck! Daddy please!” you beg as he pins you against the shower wall, water already on and at the temperature you love.
“Never dreamed that my good little Hummingbird could be so bad,” he groans as he kisses down your body.
“I’d do anything to...to keep you both s..safe! Oh fuck! You and that tongue! That’s it daddy! Bring your good girl off!” you encourage, gripping his hair tight as your pussy against his face.
One of these days, you’ll be strong enough to tell him no...sure.
“Right there, daddy! Oh fuck!” your cry out, looking down and meeting his intense gaze. “Gonna fuckin...YES!” you scream, trying to stay upright as your orgasm washes over you and your legs almost give out.
“You want it?” Lloyd smirks after he cleans up between your legs, licking up your body at a tortuously slow pace.
“You know I do!”
“Tell me what I need to hear,” he demands with a soft husk once he’s by the shell of your ear.
“I love you! I will always love you!”
Before you have a chance to prepare yourself, he’s hoisting you up and forcing your legs around his waist, before thrusting himself inside of you.
“Oh God!”
“You were gonna make me sleep without you? Make me go without this perfect little honeypot? I shouldn’t let you cum at all!,” he growls as he wraps a hand around your throat and grips it tight.
“Fuck, please! Aht! That’s...please!” you beg desperately, grinding your hips against his as you claw at his back.
“But you did so good today, my little Hummingbird,” he praises, and you clench around him, as his movements start to pick up. “Saw the video, heard you get the information...God, I want to bend you over and fuck you right in front of that poor fuck when we went back into that room.”
“Daddy!”
“Oh, someone’s close,” he chuckles darkly, “you don’t fucking cum until I tell you to, understand?”
“Shit!”
“Do you understand me?” he questions again, slapping you hard.
God, it’s been so long.
“Fuck, yes daddy! Anything you say! Anything you want!”
“Good girl, I was beginning to think you forgot how this works,” he taunts, as your toes curl in a weak attempt to fight off your release.
“Feels so good!”
“Yeah? You love when daddy’s fat cock is deep inside you? Filling this tight little cunt?”
“Feels fucking amazing! You’re so good to me!”
“You’re mine, Y/N. You’ve always been mine and you’ll always be mine, understand me?” he whispers against your neck before biting and sucking on the hollow of it.
“Lloyd,” you whimper as you lull your head back against the shower wall.
You have no fight left in you to tell him ‘no’ anymore. Doing it the first time was hard enough, but now? After everything that’s happened, walking away is beginning to feel impossible again. Yeah, you’re well aware that he would’ve acted like this if you’d never left in the first place, but it was all too much. It’s not like it isn’t too much now, but seeing just how seriously he takes you and Travis’ safety...it’s been emotional last few days, and Lloyd has truly been the only reason you’ve been able to stay anchored.
“I can’t be without you, Hummingbird. I can’t...I need you, baby!”
“Fuck, I need you...too! Need you so much! Please...too much!”
“Squeezin me so fucking tight! Christ, let go for me!”
“LLOYD!” you scream out, gripping him tight as you squirt, slowly fading out of consciousness.
“Could stay buried deep inside this pussy forever,” Lloyd growls as he fills you to the brim.
Lloyd rode out both your highs, whispering sweet nothing against your chest, while caressing your thighs.
“I love you, Hummingbird,” he tells you softly as he sets you down.
“I love you, Huckleberry,” you mumble.
“You okay?”
“Mhm,” you mumble lazily, regaining your balance as he passes you a wash cloth.
“Want me to wash you?”
“I can handle it, just give me a minute,” you giggle softly, taking it from him.
Taking a shower together was never good for you two, because even after you two would have sex, Lloyd wouldn’t keep his lips and hands off of you.
This time is no different.
Lloyd gets on his knees for you at least two more times before he finally lets you clean yourself up, but he still won’t stop pressing you against the wall and kissing you all over, and don’t protest because it’s the happiest and most relaxed you’ve been all day.
In some ways, it feels as if you two are back in college.
“What happened to start all of this?” you ask when you two finally get out of the shower.
“Hummingbird-”
“Lloyd, tell me what happened. I know you’re tired, but I am too. I deserve to know why.”
“I know you do,” he sighs as he wraps a towel around you. “Andrew pissed me off-”
“Everyone pisses you off, Lloyd.”
“This...he made a comment about you. It was a couple of months after we had that huge argument about me bailing on Travis, which I wasn’t,” he scowls and you roll your eyes, “and you stormed out. I never liked Andrew to begin with, but Denny needed me to go on this op with him, because he likes to think he can do whatever, whenever-”
“So, he thinks he’s you?”
“I’m actually good at what I do, Hummingbird,” he smirks. “Anyway, we’d just finished up, and I was gonna go out for drinks and write up my report like I always do, and he wanted to come along. He wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it, and I knew Denny would be up my ass if I killed him, so I told him he can come as long as he shuts the fuck up,” he finishes with a growl.
“Then what?”
“Some pricks can’t hold their fucking drinks. After only two drinks, he’s going on about he’d bend you over and show you who’s boss, how he’d be able to keep a woman like you in line, he’d make sure to keep you quiet with his dick in your mouth...the more he drank, the more he wouldn’t stop talking about it.”
“Oh fuck,” you sigh.
“Sure, I could’ve slit the walking void’s throat right then and there, but where’s the fun in that for me? So, after he passed out, I left him at the bar and set some...traps.”
“Lloyd-”
“Should’ve kept his fucking mouth shut. Anyway, when he woke up, he was locked up at headquarters, and was...punished for his “crimes”. To pour even more salt on the wound, I recorded myself fucking his fiancée and sent it from her phone, so when he finally got out it was the first thing he saw when he checked his phone.”
“LLOYD!”
“Should’ve kept his fucking mouth shut,” he repeats with a shrug. “Anyway, it wasn’t hard to put two and two together after that. He quit, Tina was around me and my office out of nowhere, then this shit happened. He’s not a slick as he thinks he is. His little bitch boys weren’t as smart as they thought they were. I fucked up because I didn’t think that anyone would be stupid enough to go after you and Travis, but I’m more than sure Andrew promised them something if they didn’t fuck up.”
“Why do you always have to add insult to injury? Why couldn’t you-”
“You’re mine, Hummingbird. Married or not, you are mine, just like I’m yours. He doesn’t get to talk about you like you’re some...I couldn’t just leave it alone. You know me well enough and long enough to know that was never an option.”
Why is it that simple words, from him, make your brain go stupid? Why is your heart always louder than your brain when it comes to Lloyd fucking Hansen?
He pulls you close and kisses you passionately and, for just a moment, everything feels as it should. Then, you remember the doctor in the other room and push him off. Yeah, you two already sex, but it doesn’t change the fact that, that issue still hasn’t been resolved.
You push him off of you and roll your eyes before storming out of the bathroom. The heavy sigh that leaves his mouth breaks your heart, but he’s the one who decided to bring her here.
“You’re mad at me,” Lloyd sighs once you two are finally in bed.
“I’m not mad-”
“You’re not happy with me, and I know it’s not because of Andrew.”
“At best, I’m annoyed,” you begrudgingly confess, “and don’t pretend you don’t know why.”
“I didn’t hire her to hurt you,” he starts. “Before I knew that you threatened everyone to keep working on me, she was one of the Doctors credited with saving my life. If she could save my ass with how fucked up I was, she should work on Travis if something happens. If I wanted to hurt you, I would’ve been a dick about it.”
“I know, but it’s painfully obvious that you fucked her-”
“I only did it because I thought you hadn’t come to see me and I was pissed. She made advances towards me, I had no reason to say no, so I fucked her. It was just once and it didn’t mean anything, she doesn’t mean anything. I never returned any of her texts or phone calls.”
“It’s not like I have any right to be annoyed-”
“Don’t start that.”
“Lloyd, don’t. This doesn’t change the fact-”
“What if we compromise?”
“Compromise?” you ask, sitting up and facing him.
Since when is that word apart of his vocabulary?
“I’m not saying that I’m going to quit, BUT-” he quickly interjects when he catches your roll your eyes, “I spoke to Denny about it, and I can...I can do desk work. More suit and tie shit and no more field work,” he mutters.
“Lloyd-”
“You’ve gotta meet me halfway, Hummingbird. I’m trying.”
“Too much has happened-”
“It’s nothing that can’t be fixed or worked on! We’re both guilty, and I’m very obviously the more guilty party in all of this, but you pushed me away-”
“Because I wanted you to put Travis and I first!”
“What do you think I’m doing now?!”
“Not quitting!”
“Hummingbird, you love me just as much now as you did then, if not more. You never take that necklace off and instead of throwing your engagement ring out, or selling it, you added it to the chain. You know that my love for you has never stopped or changed, we both...we can fix this. I’m still the same man you fell in love with, made a little bit better because I had you in my life, and you’re just as perfect as you’ve always been. I know I’ve hurt you and I was a petty piece of shit, and I’m sorry, but it’s not gonna happen again. I want to do right by you and Travis and I can, but you have to have to meet me halfway. You’ve known me long enough to know that this is the closest I’m ever gonna get to a fucking desk job.”
“Why can’t you be a weapons specialist or run your own weapons store? Why do you have to-”
“Because it makes me happy, and you know how many few things actually do that. Yes, you and Travis make me happier than I ever thought I could be, but I’ve found my calling with my job and for as much as you hate it, I’m fucking good at it.”
“Lloyd-”
“Meet me halfway, Hummingbird. Please,” he begs softly.
This would be so much easier if you didn’t love him so much.
“I can’t just...I have to think about this, Lloyd. I mean really think about it,” you tell him softly.
“Hummingbird-”
“I’m not saying ‘no’, Lloyd. I’m saying I need to think about it. Yeah, we’re madly in love with each other, and we always will be, but it’s not like this relationship has always been healthy to begin with. I want to be with you, I know Travis wants us to be together, but I can’t just say yes to make you happy. I’ve done more than my fair share to make you happy, and I need to truly think about this. If we’re going to raise Travis together, we can’t be together like we were before. It won’t work.”
“You promise to truly think about it?”
“I do,” you smile at him.
Almost instantly, Lloyd is pulling you down and kissing you passionately.
“Lloyd, we need rest,” you giggle with a moan as he kisses down your body.
“We have enough time and energy for one more round, Hummingbird,” he mumbles against your skin before disappearing under the covers.
As Lloyd takes his time bringing you off with his tongue and fingers, you lay there (lost in pure euphoria) and wonder if you two really should give it a try? Is all of this, you and him, really worth trying?
One thing is for sure: you’re not against the idea of it.
**
“Lloyd, we don’t have time for trips! We finals coming up and-”
“You and I both know you’re gonna pass, so don’t give me some bullshit excuse about how you need to study, Hummingbird.”
“I wasn’t gonna say that I need to study, you need to study!”
“I’ll be fine-”
“Lloyd, we’ve been driving for 4 hours-”
“Which means we’re almost there! Will you stop worrying?”
“Where are you taking me?”
“It’s a surprise.”
“Lloyd-”
“You trust me?”
“Unfortunately.”
“Then just be happy,” he chuckled softly as he placed his hand on your upper thigh.
“Lloyd-”
“You wore my favorite dress.”
“I thought we were going to breakfast!”
“This early?”
“You never know with you. I showed up for a sunrise breakfast that I thought was a early morning run with you once, and I’ll never make that mistake again!”
“Yeah, but your ass looked great in those sweats,” he smirked and you playfully punched him in the arm. “Hummingbird?”
“Hmm?”
“Remember a couple of months ago when I kidnapped you from the library and we fucked under the stars?”
“Yeah,” you scoffed.
“You remember what I said?”
“About our future?”
“Yeah.”
“No matter what happens, you’ll always look out for your little Hummingbird and you’ll always love me. There’s never going to be anyone or anything more important to you, and that you’ll take care of me for as long as eternity allows.”
“Did you believe me?”
“I always believe you, Lloyd.”
“I love you, Hummingbird.”
“I love you too, Huckleberry.”
The rest of the trip didn’t take long, but you didn’t stop showering him with questions. However, by the time you two reached the destination, you couldn’t help but laugh at where he took you two to.
“Huckleberry Farms?!” you laughed.
“I figured it would be a good break for you, Hummingbird,” he smirked.
“But you-”
“You come first. You need a break, so I’m giving you one.”
There was no sense in arguing with him when he was like that. When Lloyd wanted to do something for you, he was dead set on doing it, no matter what. So, you just decided to let yourself enjoy the day and make the most of whatever he had to offer. Lloyd loved to spoil you, especially when he felt you were stressed out or too high strung.
However, it really was the best day.
He rented out the farm, had all your favorite breakfast foods made fresh, indulged in your silly desire to pick berries, gave you piggyback rides whenever you wanted them, and made sure to have whatever you were too shy to ask for packed up and sent back to your dorm.
It was like something out of a fairy-tale.
“Lloyd, we have to get back,” you giggled as placed kisses up and down your neck, as you two walked down one of the fields.
“You don’t want anymore berries?”
“Lloyd, I’m going to turn into a berry if you keep feeding them to me,” you laughed.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the CIA thing. I promise to never lie or hold anything back from you again.”
“I’m still not happy about it,” you muttered as you looked up and stuck your tongue out at him.
“But you’re still here,” he laughed.
“Because I still love you. Even if you are the most insufferable asshole in the world.”
“One of my many charms,” he chuckled, “how strong do you think your love is for me?”
“Despite your need to be a complete asshole at times, I think my love is strong enough to handle it. I think the love I have for you is strong enough to survive anything in this life and the next. It’s strong enough to love you just as much on your good days as well as your bad days.”
“You really think so? Flaws and all?”
“Flaws and all, Hansen. There’s only you for me,” you smiled at him as he came to a standstill.
“That’s good, cause it makes my next question a lot easier to ask,” he said as he got down on one knee.
“Oh my God! Lloyd-”
“I know that I’m not the easiest one to love or get along with, and I know that I don’t make this easy, but I love you, Y/N. I think I’ve always been in love with you, I was just too arrogant and cocky to admit it before, but you were patient. You’re nicer than I deserved, more understanding than anyone I’ve ever met, extremely loyal, you’re fucking gorgeous as hell, you’re annoyingly smart, you have an extremely dark sense of humor, you...I can go on forever about why you’re so fucking perfect,” he chuckled and you giggled as you wiped away your tears. “I know I don’t make any of this easy, but I swear that I try my fucking hardest for you, and I will always try my hardest for you. So,” he started as he pulled the black velvet box out of his pocket, “will you marry me?”
He burst out laughing when you knocked him over with the hug you tackled him with. He wrapped his arms around you and kissed you passionately and you unintentionally ground yourself against him when you went to sit up.
“Ya know, we do have the farm to ourselves,” he smirked as burst out laughing.
“Lloyd!”
“Give that finger,” he laughed as he took your left hand and placed the engagement ring on your finger. “I love you, Hummingbird. Until the end of time.”
As you toy with your engagement ring, that sits on the chain right next to your hummingbird, your other hand brings your cigarette up to your lips and you take a drag from it. You can’t stop thinking about that day. It was the best day of your life, at the time, but it also feels like a lifetime ago. No, maybe you and Lloyd aren’t ever supposed to get back to that place, but how do you two get to a place that’s better? Especially, after everything that’s happened between the two of you.
“I thought you quit those damn things,” your Mother sighs as she makes her way out onto the back deck.
“Ya know, for as much as you hate Lloyd, you sure do sound like him a lot,” you mutter.
“I don’t hate him-”
“You don’t like him.”
“Can you blame me?”
“Stay out of it, Mama.”
“I’m guessing by that mark on your neck that you two are back together?” she questions as she takes a seat next to you.
“We’re gonna try and see if we can work things out.”
“After all of this?”
“Please-”
“Do you see how you’re living?! All that you’re going through?!”
“Mom-”
“And you were clearly okay with not telling your Father and I everything from the beginning-”
“I told you he works for the CIA!”
“You never told us that your life would be at risk! And now look! My grandson is upstairs fighting for his life and guards are watching the house! Do you know how that makes me feel?!”
Whatever patience you’re holding on to has just left the building.
“How you...how you feel?! He’s my son! I held him in my fucking arms while he bled out! I was the one trying to be strong while I had a dead babysitter in the kitchen, who’s only dead because she’d been mistaken for me, while I tried to calm my son down! I was alone! How do you feel?! How the fuck do you think I feel?! I already went through this shit with Lloyd, and now I have to go through it again with our son!? I’m so fucking tired of everyone preaching to me like they know the hell I’ve gone through! You don’t know a damn thing, so stay out of it!” you finish in a huff.
Your Mother is quiet before saying, “because I was out of line, that is the only time you will ever speak to me like that. Do you understand me?”
“I swear to Christ-”
“Y/N-”
“No, you don’t get to come here, criticize me or Lloyd, and then tell me I can’t speak to you in the manner in which you deserve! You don’t know all the hell that either of us have been through, or how hard Lloyd has been working to find the man responsible! So yes, when you come over and start talking shit, I will talk to you in the way which you deserve!”
“I’m just trying to protect you-”
“I DON’T NEED IT RIGHT NOW!” you shout at her. “I don’t need anyone else telling me how bad Lloyd is for me or how much better I deserve!”
After everything with Tina, the last thing you need is another fucking lecture.
“I’m not trying to upset you-”
“He’s waking up!” Lloyd says as he makes his way outside. “He started stirring in his sleep...he’s waking up,” he smiles with tears in his eyes.
You can’t even think. You just make your way inside and push past everyone in your way, before racing up the steps and almost bursting into Travis’ room.
“Mom?” he calls softly.
“Mommy’s here, baby,” you sob with a giant smile on your face as you make your way into the room.
“Are...are you okay? What happened?”
“You’re fine, so I’m fine. Don’t worry about what happened,” you sniff as you make your way over to his bedside, “all that matters is your safe now and everything is going to be okay,” you smile as you cup his face, kissing his forehead. “Your Dad is here and so am I, and we promise to keep you safe.”
“My body hurts,” he croaks, his voice still hoarse.
“We’re gonna get you back to yourself in no time. We have football practice starting soon,” Lloyd smiles, and you can see the tears welling in his eyes.
“Are you hungry? Is there anything you want? What can he have?” you ask the doctor, finally looking up to see that there’s a new doctor.
While the doctor is going over his dietary restrictions, for the time being, your Mother runs downstairs and you know she’s making him something to eat.
“When can he start physical therapy?” Lloyd asks as he takes a seat at the edge of the bed.
“We’ll see how he feels in a few days and that’ll help us figure out the best time to get started.”
“You’re gonna stay, right Dad?” Travis asks weakly, but hopeful.
“I’m not going anywhere. Your Mom and I are gonna be right here in this house every step of the way,” he smiles at him, but you can see the pain in his eyes.
The fact that Travis would have to question whether or not he would stay with him during a time like this breaks his heart, and he knows that he’s going to have to start making changes and making them soon.
Soon enough, your Mother comes back with a tray full of food that Travis can only some of, and Lloyd is texting Denny to tell him that Travis is awake, only for Denny to come running in a few moments later with good news of his own.
“Hey Lloyd Jr.,” Denny smiles towards Travis, a few of his own happy tears falling. “The sooner you get better, the sooner we can get you back to the shooting range.”
“The shooting...?! LLOYD!” you shout as Travis starts laughing softly.
“I’m joking,” Denny laughs and you flip him off. “I do need to speak to the both of you though.”
“Mom-”
“We’ll both be right outside the door, baby. I promise,” you smile at him before ushering both Lloyd and Denny out into the hallway. “Mom, listen to the doctor and stop trying to feed him,” you warn before closing the door behind you.
“He’s in the basement,” Denny tells the both you before you even have a chance to ask what’s going on.
“Is that fuck alive?” Lloyd practically growls and you say a silent prayer, BEGGING God that your Mother stays in Travis’ room.
Shes never seen him unhinged and the last thing you need is for this to be the first time she sees it.
“He’s alive. A bit beat up, the asshole put up a fight, but he’s alive. How do you wanna handle it?”
“Hummingbird, you go back in there with Travis and I’ll-”
“I want to go.”
“You don’t have to deal with this, Hummingbird. This is my mess. I did this.”
“That is a hell of a thing for you to say to me.”
Lloyd nods with a smirk before opening the door open a little and telling Travis, “we have to go down to the basement for a little bit, okay? Listen to your grandmother.”
“You said you’d stay-”
“We’re all gonna stay in the house, we just need to have a talk in the basement. Behave yourself and we’ll watch whatever movie you want when we come back up, okay?” Lloyd tells him in a stern voice.
Daddy indeed.
As the three of you start on your way down the stairs and to the cellar, you’re nothing but amazed by how quickly both of their demeanor’s change. It’s not lost on you that Lloyd is extremely good at what he does, God knows he has more than enough crazy to do it, but this is the first time you’ve seen it in real time. He’s not coming home and telling you about a shitty mission, or fucking you until you can’t talk to get over a mission: you’re actually watching him work. You don’t mind watching him work, because the people he’s killing now...well, they deserve it.
Maybe that’s how you’ve been able to stomach his job for all these years.
You constantly told yourself that he was doing what he did, because whoever he was hurting deserved it. You’re not some naive idiot that thinks that government is pure and true in all of its activities, and you’re not dumb enough to think Lloyd is some saint at heart, but you also know him well enough that he’s loyal. Yeah, he cheated on you, but he also didn’t lie to you about it. He would do anything Denny asks and Denny wouldn’t ask unless he really needed it.
If Lloyd is Doc Holliday, Denny is definitely Wyatt Earp.
When you all reach the cellar, Denny and Lloyd are quick to grab guns before continuing down to the end of the hall.
“You sure about this, Hummingbird?” Lloyd asks, his hand on the doorknob.
“I’m stronger than I look,” you nod towards him.
Lloyd chuckles before opening the door, and once again, his demeanor changes almost instantly.
“Well well, looks like we’ve caught the ugliest fly in our little trap. Hello, Andrew,” Lloyd chuckles with a sinister smile.
Okay, maybe you should have stayed upstairs.
“Brought your little bitch so you could show off?” the man sputters out, spitting out blood all over himself.
“Awh c’mon! Our little game of cat and mouse wasn’t fun for you? I had a blast!” Lloyd smiles while feigning innocence at the same time.
“Should’ve killed you when I had the chance!”
“I’m really loving the fake optimism,” he chuckles, “because you and I both know that’s bullshit. You never had a chance, because you were never good enough,” he almost whispers as he makes his way over to the man that’s tied up to the bloody metal chair. “You weren’t good enough to take that mission on your own, you weren’t good enough to keep your fianc��e or satisfy her, and you weren’t good enough to kill me or my family. You’re no daisy at all, you’re a waste of fucking time and your Mother would’ve been better off swallowing you. Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe you’re just a botched abortion,” Lloyd laughs before back handing the shit out of him.
All Andrew does in response is spit at Lloyd and it makes you laugh, because that’s one of Lloyd’s softer insults.
“If you didn’t want to be friends anymore, that’s all you had to say,” Lloyd sighs before backhanding him again.
“I thought I made that pretty fucking clear when your kid got shot,” Andrew sputtered with a dark laugh.
Maybe you’ve been around Lloyd too long, but that statement alone is all it takes for you to snap. You push past a mercenary, grab Lloyd’s pistol, flip it easily enough and pistol whip the asshole in the chair.
“Ah, I see the draw of you, you’re a feisty little bitch,” he chuckles darkly, sadistic grin coming to his face.
He’s a tough ignorant piece of shit. You’ll give him that.
“You know,” you start as you backup slowly, “I was gonna be nice and let Lloyd just kill you. Not as a courtesy to you, but because I’ve experienced so much shit in the last few days and I’m tired. However, I’ve had a change of heart. I think you I want you to experience just some of the pain I’ve gone through these past few days,” you smile at him before ripping off his pants (which was easy enough because of all of the damn holes in them), then turning to Lloyd. “Where are the cables?”
“Right over there, Hummingbird,” he smirks, nodding towards the wall while not even attempting to hide the fact that he’s turned on by the new side of yourself that you’ve discovered.
“You think I don’t know Lloyd’s torture tactics? I’ve worked with him, you ignorant bitch!” Andrews calls, coughing up blood.
“I’ve never seen a single thing Lloyd does, so this is all from my head,” you giggle as you clamp one of the cables down on his barely covered cock (his boxers have clearly taken a beating also).
“FUCK!”
“Don’t tell me you’re getting sensitive on me! I haven’t even done anything yet,” you pout as you attach the other clamp to the upper part of his inner thigh.
“Stop! Stop, I’m sorry, okay?!” the man pleads desperately.
Either you’re crazier than Lloyd, or this guy really didn’t expect you to be this broken up about him trying to kill the two most important people in your life.
Dumbass.
“You’re sorry? That’s...I’m so happy you’re sorry,” you laugh maniacally as you grab the electric cable box and hook cable cords to it.
“God, she’s such a little Devil, isn’t she?” Lloyd muses with a smile.
“Gun please?” you ask politely as you hold out your hand, and Lloyd is all too happy to give it to you.
“Please-”
“Too late to be a little bitch about it now,” you chuckle softly as you shoot him in the kneecap. “You’ll soon come to find that Lloyd is the least of the problems,” you promise as you shoot the other, popping it like a bloody zit.
You attach the cables to the electric box and turn it up to 60.
“Now, I’ve never done this before,” you smile innocently, “so this is gonna be an experiment for the both of us.”
You press the little black button and a small smile comes to your face as painful and pitiful cries leave Andrew’s mouth.
Alright, you’re starting to understand why Lloyd loves his job so much.
“You tried to kill my son!” you all but growl after you release the button.
“I didn’t tell them-”
“There’s no use in coming up with an excuse now,” you shrug before pressing the button again.
“PLEASE! PL...PLEASE!” he cries out and you hear Lloyd chuckle behind you. “STOP!!”
“Does it hurt?” you ask as you turn up the wattage. “Does it feel terrible? I promise it doesn’t feel nearly as terrible as holding your child in your arms while he’s bleeding out.”
“I’M....PLEASE!”
“Just a little bit longer,” you promise, still holding the button down giving Lloyd back his gun.
“Ll-Lloyd! MA...MAKE HER-”
“She’s the one running show,” he laughs not hiding any of the pleasure he finds in all of this.
“Before you die, I just want you to know the ounce of the pain I felt and that I’ve been feeling since all of this shit happened. Burn in hell you piece of shit,” you spit before finally letting go of the button.
“Please-”
“Finish him,” is all you tell Lloyd before dropping the little box.
“Lloyd-”
“Goodnight, Dewdrop,” Lloyd smiles.
Once again, you don’t even flinch when you hear the gun go off. You just stand there and look at the lifeless mess in front of you. In that moment, it hits you. You finally understand how Lloyd feels and why he does what he does. No, it’s not perfect or ideal, but it helps a lot with all of the issues and anger that everyone tends to hide away. Of course, your anger was only concerning Travis and Lloyd, but you’re now able to understand how Lloyd’s line speaks to him.
Every bit of anger, understandable or not, was released in the work that he did. The shootings, the torture, the belittling, the self assured attitude...you understand it. Lloyd has always been unhinged, that’s never been lost on anyone, and this job is the only thing that keeps him from going off the rails completely.
No, you don’t want to take that away from him, but you also can’t keep living like this.
“Take him out and get rid of him,” Lloyd demands and it pulls you out of your thoughts. “You and I are gonna have a little talk later,” he whispers seductively before turning his attention to Denny. “Is this finished?”
“It’s done.”
“Good, we’re gonna get back upstairs to our son. He’ll be asking for you soon enough, so whatever work you have to do...”
“I’ll be up soon,” Denny smiles softly before addressing everyone else. “Clean this room out. I don’t want any traces of what happened these past few days. No residue; make what happened disappear. Disobey and there will be consequences.”
How the fuck are they able to fix their emotions so fast? You’re still ready to burn everything down.
Lloyd can sense your anxiety and grabs your hand, leading you out of the room before saying, “tonight, Hummingbird. I’ll take care of you and make all of this better.”
You both spend the rest of the day with Travis, Denny, and both sets of your parents (you try to get them to limit their time but neither are having it). Travis drifts in and out of sleep, which the doctor explains is to be expected. He’s stable and in good condition, but he’s been through a lot of trauma. The doctor also says that he’s gonna have a rough road to recovery. However, overall, things are looking up and you feel confident.
For the first time in a while, you feel like you can breathe again.
“We’re gonna be right across the hall, Honey,” you promise Travis as he grips your hand.
“What if-”
“I’ll never let anything like this happen to you again,” Lloyd promises him.
Usually, Lloyd hates when Travis gets emotionally and starts crying (it’s something you two have argued about in the past), but you’re more than happy to see that he understands that is a fair response to everything that happens. Yes, you know that Lloyd is a more than capable parent, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s a dick most of the time.
“Mom?”
“I’ll be right across the hall with your Father, I promise. I’ll check on you before I go to bed.”
“We both will,” Lloyd assures him.
Travis doesn’t say anything, he just nods and you both make your way over to him and kiss him on the forehead.
“We love you so much,” you smile at him, giving his hand a soft squeeze.
“I love you...love you both,” he yawns as he quickly succumbs to sleep.
Both you and Lloyd quickly and quietly make your way out, and let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.
“He’s okay, Hummingbird. He’s going to be okay,” Lloyd tells you softly, kissing the top of your head as he takes your hand in his. “I want someone outside this door at all times. I don’t give a fuck if you have to take a shit, you don’t leave this spot until someone is here to take your place. Do you understand me?” he instructs one of the mercenaries.
“Yes sir.”
“If you fuck this up, Andrew will have gone through a walk in the park compared to what I’ll do to you.”
The mercenary gulped and Lloyd smiles in satisfaction.
“Good boy.”
You’re all set to go into the room that has been set up for you, but Lloyd’s grip on your hand tightens, and he’s pulling you into his room. It’s not lost on you that you can say no, but once again, you don’t want to.
“Don’t look at me like that,” you breathe, backing up until your back is against the wall.
“Like what?” he asks, kicking the door closed.
“Like I’m your prey.”
“Hummingbird, you’re my entire world,” he coos as he makes his way over to you.
“Lloyd, we can’t keep doing this. We haven’t...don’t,” you moan as he grips your neck and starts to caress it with his tongue.
“If you really want me to stop, I will,” he promises before pressing soft kisses up and down your neck. “If you don’t want me to ever touch you again, I won’t.”
“Lloyd,” you sigh with a moan, running your hands through his hair.
“I love you and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all of this, but please,” he begs as he gets on his knees, unbuttoning your jeans, “please just think about taking me back.”
“Lloyd-”
“Think about it while I make you feel better,” he pleads before licking your clit.
At the end of the day, there’s nothing you won’t do for Lloyd, and taking him back...well, it can’t be too bad, can it? If there’s a way for you two to work it out, isn’t it worth giving it a shot? You both are still deeply and madly in love with each other, and you both-
“Shit!” you moan as quietly as you can as he curls the two fingers he has inside of you, grinding your pussy against his face a little.
All you’re doing is encouraging to pick up his pace, because Lloyd’s most favorite thing in the world is bringing you off.
“Pl...please,” you beg pathetically, gripping his hair tighter than you mean to, as you grab at nothing.
You force your gaze on him, and see that his gaze on you is both soft and intense. You don’t need him to vocalize that he’s begging for you. He needs you just as much (if not more) as you need him.
“I’m yours,” you whimper softly, “I’m yours !”
He pulls on your clit with his lips and that’s all it takes to send you over the edge. He takes his time cleaning you up, never breaking the gaze, before starting to kiss his way slowly up your body. The touch of his fingers are teasingly soft against your skin, and it makes you ache for him even more. The ghost of his lips on your collar bone make you whine in protest, and you hear him chuckle softly as he pulls on your black tank top, pulling just enough to expose your tits as he maneuvers the both of you to the bed.
“Baby!”
“Still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on! Never gonna be without you again, Hummingbird,” he husk, getting you on the bed and on your back, before taking one of your nipples into his mouth, licking and sucking on it like he hasn’t had you time and time again over the last few days.
“I need you! Please!”
“Gotta keep quiet, Hummingbird,” he chuckles after releasing your nipple with a ‘pop’, while you undo his pants. “So fucking desperate!”
“I need you inside me, baby! I always fucking need you!” you confess with a sob.
“I love you so fucking much,” he groans as he thrusts himself inside of you.
“FUCK!”
“Always such a warm fucking welcome, Hummingbird!”
“I want you...want you to show me...how much you love me,” you whimper, grinding your hips against his.
“I’ll take all night just to make sure you get the point,” he promises before pinning your hands above your head, “so, hang on tight.”
You both do your best to keep quiet, but it’s hard not scream out in pleasure every time Lloyd brings you off. It feels like the first time you two made love all over again. No, not the drunken chaos that was you two hooking up at the frat party, but the time after that.
“Lloyd,” you moan as he grips your hip tight, before he caresses then hooks it over his waist.
“I could listen to my name leave your mouth all fucking day,” he grunts as he fucks into you harder and faster. “I love you so fucking much! God, the greediest little fucking cunt!”
“I never...never wanna be without you again,” you confess softly as as your orgasm builds. “So...so full! Lloyd!”
“Do you need it, Hummingbird? Do you need it as bad as I do?”
“Fuck...yes! Yes please!” you sob as you dig your nails into his back, the feel of his breath on your neck pushing you even closer to your release. “Feels so good...having you...having you like this! All mine!”
“Forever!”
“Shit!” you cry out softly as as you squirt your release all on his cock and the bed.
“Such a good girl,” he husks as he shoots his load into you, coating your walls with his release.
There’s no use in fighting it anymore. There’s no use in telling him no.
“Lloyd,” you breathe as you come down from your high, trying to silence all the voices in your head telling you not to say what you’ve been thinking all day. “I’m not...I don’t know if we can ever be together again-”
“Hummingbird-”
“I’m not gonna lie to you and tell you something you want to hear just because we’ve had amazing sex these last few days. However,” you quickly continue before he has a chance to interject, “I’m not against trying.”
“Wait...what?”
“I love you and you love me. It’s not perfect, it’s messy, and there’s a lot to work on, but it’s worth working on. We’re worth working on.”
“Hummingbird, don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”
“I’m not promising you anything other than me trying. We’ll do our best and see how it works out. I want to make this work, Lloyd. I miss you and...I miss us. I wanna try again,” you confess reluctantly.
“Say it again,” he demands as he starts to move within you.
“I wanna try again,” you giggle with a moan, wrapping your arms around him again.
“Say it again,” he begs desperately.
“I wanna try again!”
“And to think, I was gonna give you the option of sleeping in the other room tonight,” he smirks and you burst out laughing.
You and Lloyd keep each other up for hours, repeatedly telling one another how much you love each other and how you’re both determined to make it work. When you both finally bow out, you letting Lloyd hold you close because it’s the only way you’ll feel like you’re home, you think about all you’ve told him in the last few days.
No, it’s not exactly what he wants to hear, but it’s honest and that’s what he wants more than anything. You’re not giving him false hope, and you’re also not giving him no hope.
You’re giving him just enough to go on.
As you rest your head on his chest, feeling safe and loved in his tight hold on you, you fall asleep praying that things can finally go how you’ve always wanted them to.
Hoping and praying that you and Lloyd have finally gone through enough shit to finally get it right.
**
1 Year Later
“Mom! Dad! Keep up!” Travis calls as he runs towards Cinderella’s castle.
“Why the fuck did we bring him to Disney?” Lloyd growls under his breath as giggle quietly.
“Because he almost died and now he gets everything he wants. Plus, it’s his birthday,” you smile at Lloyd before turning your attention towards your son, “we’re right behind you, sweetie!”
“Where the hell is Uncle Denny?!”
“TRAVIS!” you shout as Lloyd starts laughing.
You’re truly going to choke him out.
“Where is Uncle Denny?” Travis scowls as he rolls his eyes.
“Right here,” Denny chuckles as he throws out the cup that contained his drink.
Since the shooting, a lot has changed. Lloyd made good on his work and has stuck to desk work, only doing physical work when he absolutely has to, he’s been around for Travis and all of the activities he participates in, Denny comes around more (at Travis’ request), and you and Lloyd purchased a home together.
Much to your parent’s dismay.
“So you’re just gonna take him back? After everything?” your Mother questioned, standing in her kitchen with her arms folded across her chest.
“Please, I don’t need it.”
“You need to listen to your Mom, she’s just looking out for you,” your Father sighed before he took a sip of his whiskey.
“Yeah, I know, okay? If there’s anyone who knows, it’s me. I’m the one that fell in love with him, I’m the one who married him, had his kid, argued with him, cried over him, divorced him...it was all me! I don’t need anyone telling me how terrible he can be!”
“Yet, you’re going to get back with him?!” your Mother shouted.
“We’re not back together, it’s just for convenience. Travis feels safer this way-”
“Don’t bullshit a bullshitter, babygirl,” your Mother scoffed as she threw her cooking rag down.
“Can we not argue about this? I’m really not in the mood.”
“Y/N-”
“You never liked him anyway!”
“Him? His parents? How can you like him?! Let alone love him?!”
“He’s not as terrible as you think!”
“Didn’t slam you against a wall and choke you when Travis-”
“He didn’t hurt me! He never would!”
“Y/N, you’re not safe with-”
“Travis and I are safer with him than anyone else! Jesus, I’m not a child! I don’t need you both to agree with everything I do, I’m just trying to make you aware-”
“Did you know that they’re still people watching our house? Watching where we go?!”
“He’s just trying to keep you both safe-”
“Safe from what?!”
“FROM WHATEVER ENEMIES HE MAY HAVE!” you yelled, tired of the constant back and forth with them.
“Y/N,” your Father sighed, clearly tired and fed up, “if you’re going to be with Lloyd, we obviously can’t stop you. We’re both very aware of how much you love him, and you’ve always been too stubborn to listen. Just make sure that the life you have with him, is the life you really want. Yes, love is a hell of a drug, but don’t get too addicted to it. Don’t get too addicted to him,” he warned.
It’s not like you don’t know that they both were making valid points. Yes, Lloyd lives a dangerous life, and he’s 100% certifiable, but you also know that he’d do any and everything to keep you and Travis safe. From the moment Lloyd stepped foot into your life, he has become the center of your universe. All you ever wanted was a full and happy life with Lloyd, and unfortunately, that’s never going to change.
“Stop it,” you giggled as Lloyd hoisted you onto the counter, quickly ripping your panties off. “Travis is sleeping!”
“So be quiet,” Lloyd smirked as he got on his knees.
“Lloyd-”
“Do you like the furniture, Hummingbird?”
“Yes daddy,” you moaned as he easily and skillfully pulled down your panties.
“Is there anything you want that we don’t have, baby?” he asked as he massaged your clit with two fingers.
“No...Huckleberry!”
“Is there anything you need?”
“Only you, daddy. Only ever need you,” you sighed as he started to fuck you with his fingers.
Yes, you two had many sweet and romantic, you two never stopped being sluts for one another, but that doesn’t mean the arguments ever calmed down.
“I have done everything you’ve asked of me, Hummingbird!”
“You could just fucking quit!”
“We agreed to desk work-”
“Lloyd, stop it! Stop acting like I’m being unreasonable! It’s not safe-”
“Hummingbird, you promised me you’d try-”
“I have!”
“Its only been 4 months! Its been 4 months and you’ve been complaining since day one!”
“Lloyd-”
“I need you to meet me half way on this!”
“AND I NEED YOU TO QUIT!” you screamed before you stormed out.
“Y/N,” he growled as he followed after you, “stop being a fucking brat!”
“I’m being...then how about I just fucking leave?!”
“Stop it!” he demanded as grabbed your wrist. “You fucking told me you’d try, so you need to at least fucking try!”
“Let me go!”
“I will when you start behaving!”
“Behaving?! I’m not a child!’
“Then stop acting like one!”
“Lloyd, let me go or I swear to God-”
“What will you do, Hummingbird?! Hmm? Cause you’re not fucking leaving me!” he shouted as he slammed you against the wall.
“Stop it!”
“You have to fucking try! Stop threatening to leave every time something doesn’t go your fucking way! Stop trying to bully into doing whatever the fuck you want!” he demanded hotly as he undid your jeans.
“Lloyd-”
“You don’t want to leave, you want to get your way, and daddy’s told you about being a spoiled little brat, hasn’t he?” he husked as he forced your pants down, before he slid his hand down your panties.
“You’re such a fucking asshole,” you moaned before slapping him.
“Don’t be a little bitch, Humming!” he growled as he started fucking you with his fingers.
“Fuck!”
“You need daddy to be rough with you, is that it? It’s been so long since I’ve treated you like my own little fuck toy, I forget just how much fucking need it!”
“Lloyd-”
“What’s my fucking name?!” he snapped before slapping you with his other hand, while fucking you faster with his fingers.
“Fuck!”
“You better not fucking cum until I say so! Now what’s my fucking name?”
“DADDY!”
“Good girl,” he chuckled as he removed his fingers.
“DADDY!”
“I’m gonna spend all night reminding you who is in charge. Lucky for us, Travis is spending the night with his grandparents, so feel free to be as loud as you want, Hummingbird,” he smirked as he shoved his fingers into your mouth. “I think we’ll start with you sucking me off until I’m satisfied and we’ll work our way up from there. Sound good, Hummingbird?”
It’s not surprising that sex is what always brings you both back down to earth, instead of yelling and throwing things, because the whole thing started because of a college hookup. No, it’s not necessarily healthy, but it helps get you two to someplace. Plus, you’ll never turn down sex Lloyd. That’s just as a good as it is bad as far as you’re concerned.
No, it’s not always a walk in the park, but you and Lloyd do your best to make it work. Lloyd holds his tongue when you do or say something he doesn’t like, he tries his best to not take charge of everything, and he finally fucking listens to you. What makes you happy, what makes you anxious, what your fears and doubts are, and what want for the both of you.
In return, you try your best to to control your temper. You don’t yell when he stays late, you don’t go silent when he has to do physical work, you don’t shut him out when he makes you upset, and you don’t resort to petty activity when he pisses you off. You both make an active effort to be better than you two were before because, after staying up for hours and talking about it, you both know that you two won’t last long and it’ll make Travis’ life harder.
It hasn’t been the easiest year, but its been worth it.
“Are you happy?” Lloyd asks as Travis drags Denny off in the direction of the ride.
“Yeah, I think I’m pretty happy,” you chuckle softly. “It’s not always easy, but it’s much better than it was before.”
“Yeah, Hummingbird? You feel like you can tough it out?”
“I don’t see why not,” you smile at up at him. “We’re better than we were before, we’re happier, we’ve grown and learned more about ourselves and each other...I think we needed some time apart to get to a good place.”
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you too, Lloyd. So much more than you’ll ever know.”
“Yeah? Then you wanna do me a favor?” he smirks as he gets down on one knee.
“Huckleberry...”
“You have been the center of my universe since I first laid eyes on you, and I knew that you were the one for me. It hasn’t been easy, and we’ve both made mistakes along the way, but we’re still standing. Yeah, this relationship isn’t always a daisy, but it’s no thorn either. I have never felt this way about anyone, and I’m sure I never will again. I want inch of you, every day, for the rest of my life. The good and the bad, the ups and downs, the happy and the miserable. So, I’m hoping that you’ll do me the honor of marrying me...again,” he chuckles as you dry your eyes.
“I’ll marry you over and over, again and again, every day for the rest of this life and the next,” you laugh as he places a new hummingbird ring on your finger.
It’s amazing how quickly everything goes from wrong to right in your world.
“HANSEN!” a man yells as he goes to pull out his gun.
Lloyd is quicker, pulling you down and covering you, before pulling his own gun out and firing off two shots.
You would be in love with someone who gets into a fucking gunfight at Disney.
It takes a moment, all the screaming and running only add to your anxiety, but Lloyd’s hold on you is tight enough that you know he’s okay. You look over and see Denny covering Travis, and let out a breath of relief.
“Are you-”
“I want you out of this, Lloyd. If we’re going to be together and be a real family, I want out of this for good.”
The look in Lloyd’s eyes lets you know that he’s truly on the fence about what choice to make. Does he leave the life that makes him and try something to keep you and Travis safe and happy, or does he walk away from you and all hes ever wanted?
For once in his life, you can truly see that Lloyd doesn’t know what the hell to do, and you don’t know if you’re scared for him or yourself.
~~
taglist: @maroonsunrise83, @autumnrose40, @fuckingbye, @companionjones, @emerald-evans , @whiskeytangofoxtrot555, @mazda098, @pono-pura-vida, @nomadstucky
#fanfiction#fan fiction#fanfic#fan fic#lloyd hansen#Lloyd hansen fluff#Lloyd Hansen fic#Lloyd Hansen fanfic#lloyd hansen smut#the gray man#the gray man fanfic#the gray man fanfiction#chris evans characters#lloyd hansen x reader#lloyd hansen x y/n#lloyd hansen x you#Lloyd Hansen x fem! reader#Lloyd Hansen x y/n#Lloyd Hansen
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