#I mean I'm preaching to the very small choir here but this really is one of the best KQ fics online and it was a joy to narrate. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

utilitycaster · 1 year

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Has your work with the wiki informed how you interact with the fandom? Scrutinizing the source material so closely and all.

Oh definitely, and this is a great question.

I think, without getting too deep into weeds or bitterness, that my attitude towards aggressively non-canonical (or, frankly, anti-canonical) interpretations of ships or characters has shifted both because of my negative experiences with the Fandom wiki and because I effectively have to go over the happenings of each episode two or three times. Additionally, my deep dislike and distrust of conspiracy theories long pre-dates my work on wikis or even involvement with fandom, but now that I spend a decent amount of "fandom time" looking up citations, I have even less patience for it. There are so many wonderful sources beyond just the wiki! We have a transcript search! We have Dani's recaps! We have so many sourcebooks! We have a talkback/commentary show! Please, while I'd love for people to use and add to the wiki, at the very least, if you don't have time to watch or rewatch episodes in full, use these wonderful resources instead of relying on like, someone's personal silly little clip compilations to shape your understanding.

In terms of far more positive things, I think because wiki pages are changing, living documents, going back to them has given me a lot of insight that I might have forgotten. To give an example - just now, in summarizing the party's trip towards Yios, I ran across the fact that Imogen was asked if she wanted to give up her powers - if there were a cure, whether she'd take it - and she responded that while once she felt that way, she no longer does. I think Imogen's relationship with power is fascinating, and I think this puts her in contrast with Liliana in a new and interesting way that I'd love to explore further once we return to more direct conflict. This small moment says so much, but I'd forgotten it in the several months since it aired, and probably wouldn't have accessed again if I were not a wiki editor. I've also been doing a lot of work on editing out plagiarism, or fleshing out largely overlooked details, and it's a delight to get to revisit prior campaigns and see how everything fits together. I get both a very high level view of the world, and also get to zero in on tiny moments, like Veth shooting Caleb in the Vellum Steeple library, and I'm so grateful I get to relive that, and often my meta is informed by what I'm working on and what details I'm immersed in and the connections they spark.

Finally - while I'm obviously super opinionated here, on Tumblr, I think it's a really good and important exercise that I also spend time in a place where I need to consciously prioritize a neutral voice and give attention even to things I dislike. This is an entirely separate post so I won't derail myself but I think part of why I sometimes get extremely bizarre anons/responses is that I'm both someone who talks about CR on the whole, but also am open about my preferences (rather than running a blog that's highly focused on one character/ship nor being a true generalist blog that primarily reblogs art). Anyway, working on the wiki means that, for example, even if I'm really frustrated with an episode or a character or a relationship, I need to spend time and stop and ask myself what is actually happening, outside of my own feelings. I think this is a really good practice to have with fiction! I think you need to be able to do both and compartmentalize and switch between them; to say "what is the author/creator trying to say and how are they saying it and what is literally occurring" and also "how do I, an individual with my own unique perspective, feel about what's happening." Or at the very least, if you can't do this, you can still enjoy yourself, but you will always be preaching to the choir.

#answered #blorbologist #critical role wiki #cr tag #my philosophy is that you should lie down on the floor and let the narrative deep tissue massage you #and i think once you get that you will understand all my positions as a coherent viewpoint even if they're loud and obnoxious at times

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camaro-and-smokes · 2 years

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One thing I've been thinking...

These are just my random thoughts, so feel free to disagree.

Lately I've seen a lot of posts in the fandom in increasing extent that's kinda sad imo. (I've been in this fandom for a short while, but in a lot bigger fandom for years, and in my experience, the negativity is always the same, the package just is different.)

People get really worked up by the Billy/Dacre antis on all platforms, and then they vent about it here, and make sometimes compelling and sometimes less compelling arguments in defence of both.

It's fine, ppl need to vent and hey, everyone is allowed to do what they want on their blog and if someone can't take it, unfollow, block, filter content, blah blah blah. Simple as that.

But I just always think how much those people allow the antis actually take their own headspace and then spew the negative energy from the antis directly to the positive fandom here on Tumblr.

I assume most of the negativity comes from Twatter and dickdock (I hate both and haven't used the first in years and the other one but once and logged off immediately – I know they're both very volatile spaces). I know antis are here too, but I assume it's way smaller issue here than in those two. (Quick check on the anti billy hargrove tag tells me that most of those here are teens and young adults who are yet to grow up, so not worth even a thought)

I come on Tumblr to get away from real world. To forget all the negativity of other ppl and just in general get away from everything that's happening in real world. I try to follow blogs that post positive stuff and engage only with content that's positive or compelling in any way.

So when I see those posts, sometimes even with screenshots from the anti's, it always makes me feel sad – but not for me.

It's always for the op as in hey, you're here where the Billy/Dacre fandom is absolutely bonkers in a GOOD way, cherishing and loving a character that never got any of that in the show itself, and loving the actor who plays the character unabashedly. And you're as the op here because of that too.

So I just wonder why do you take all that negativity be it from here or from somewhere else or here and bring it into our positive space and stain it with it? And in addition other ppl then engage with it – even if it's to just agree with the op. That's like preaching to the choir – why do it?

This is a place where you could happily enjoy the character without that much of a fear of getting bs of it. Or at least that's my experience. I haven't gotten any bs as long as I've been here. But of course this blog is very small.

So correct me if I'm wrong.

Now, I do run one big sideblog with 10k followers in a big fandom and my main has 1,5k followers too. So I know hate and how it feels when you're getting it in any form, in reblogs or anonymously on asks. It's SHIT.

But what I've learned from those two is, that as long as the hate and the antis are being addressed, neither will go away. There will always be antis and idiots who send anonymous hate.

It's called the internet.

And not to forget: social media platforms in general have been proven to boost negative content, because it keeps users on the platforms longer, meaning more income to the platforms. I repeat:

Never forget that negativity is partly designed into social media platforms.

What can be done to all of this is to choose not to engage with the negativity, and just let it be. Even if the negative views get you totally worked up and feel like you need to educate whoever.

Trust me, they won't learn anything, and you'll just spend hours on trying to do that.

This image sums my thoughts pretty much:

I guarantee that you will feel a lot better when you just

start scrolling past all the negative stuff on all platforms,

don't engage with the negativity,

don't go into the anti-Billy tags

just delete the shitty anonymous asks, and

don't spend time on writing a response here on Tumblr, where the people the responses are directed to (= antis) aren't.

And pls pls delete your accounts on any platforms that give you only shitty feels. You're not going to miss ANYTHING.

Not spending any time on the antis gives you more headspace and time to spend positively on our favourite rat boy. It makes your experience so much more better, and also the overall atmosphere of the fandom more positive for everyone everywhere.

Like I said, just random thoughts. Feel free to disagree with me.

#billy hargrove #harringrove #billy hargrove fandom #dacre montgomery #Sometimes I feel like I need to address something like this #today I was bored with work so I did this instead #I love our little rat boy #and I love this fandom #it's the best I've ever been in

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heedra · 3 years

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hi! sorry if this is a broad question, but i don't know anyone else with rats to ask. i'm thinking of getting rats for the first time and i was wondering if you have any tips or like care guidelines you think are really important. ive been doing some research and ive kept mice before but i really want to make sure i give any rats i might get a good home and some information out there seems either contradictory or just flat out wrong and im terrified to accidentally mistreat them. ty for reading!

Oh geez, that’s a big question! I’m going to start with some of the things I think might be the biggest, most critical and vital differences between keeping mice and keeping rats; if you have more questions after that, feel free to shoot me another ask! 1. Two rats is an absolute minimum, regardless of whether you own males or females. People will tell you that it’s critical to own at least two rats, and they’re technically correct, but imo the ideal minimum is actually three or four. Rats are very social, just like people, and, just like a lot of people, they are happiest when they have a group of people to build relationships with. If a rat living as part of a group isn’t getting along with one of his cagemates, he has others whose attention he can go seek out, unlike with a single pair. Introducing rats can be tricky, though, especially with boys, so if you are trying to combine rats who are strangers into one social group, definitely do your research. This website has a great rundown of some of the different methods used to introduce rats. 2. Rats absolutely cannot live in a glass tank. Even if the tank is just one part of a cage that has a ventilated wire portion up top. Rat’s noses and lungs are very sensitive to urine buildup in a way mice’s aren’t, and glass tanks offer no ventilation. Rats also need a lot of vertical climbing space in a cage, relative to mice; tall, wire cages are must for this, as are a lot of climbing toys and hammocks. 3. Related to the above, rats are very prone to respiratory infections. I mention this because this is probably the most common health problem you will encounter with them, and it’s important to know the signs. A vast majority of pet rats either have or will get mycoplasmosis (a bacterial sinus infection) at some point in their lives, and while it’s usually benign at baseline, this infection flares up in the presence of poor ventilation, excess dust, or stress. If you notice that your rat is whistling or wheezing when they sniff and breathe, or that they are snorting/sneezing a lot, talk to the vet you go to for small animal health about getting them on an antibiotic. Respiratory problems are a part of life for rat ownership, and usually wont affect your animal’s quality of life, but if left untreated can develop into pneumonia. You don’t need to panic if your rat starts sneezing or wheezing; even if you’ve already treated them for those symptoms before; rats with myco often have more than one flareup throughout their life, and sometimes it will go away on its own once a rat gets settled in a clean environment or stops being stressed out, but you do want to get it checked if it persists! 4. Rats cannot eat alfalfa or timothy hay. This is an important one to keep an eye on, as, because almost all other pocket pets can eat these things, a lot of treats that contain timothy hay and alfalfa will be branded as being for all pet rodents, even when they’re not safe for rats. It’s not that these are immediately poisonous to rats, they just can’t digest them, so too much of it will inevitably cause intestinal blocks.

5. Male rats can’t eat citrus. This one is kind of debated, but I think it’s fair to err on the safe side. D-limosine, a chemical found in citrus peels, is considered to be linked to testicular cancer in rats. I’d personally suggest just avoiding citrus entirely with rats. 6. Rats need at LEAST 30 minutes a day of playtime with you, outside of their cage. Ideally, this should be closer to an hour. This is important both so that they can bond with you as their human, and so that they’re getting a source of exercise and mental stimulation that goes beyond what they can find in their cage. Set up a safe play area in your home; an enclosed bedroom, a clean bathroom, or an area fenced off by some kind of plastic barrier work well; make sure the space is free of dangerous things to eat and electrical wires. Furnish it with things the rats can climb on and hide in, leave some treats around for them to find, and make sure you’re present and keeping an eye on them! This is a great time to try and train your rats to do tricks or run obstacle courses, or to play games with them (mine really like to chase strings and tissue paper around).

7. There’s no difference in emotional, exercise, and enrichment needs between male and female rats. There’s a big myth that male rats are lazy and cuddly, while female rats are playful and active. In truth, any rat can be any combination of these things; it all comes down to individual personality. “Lazy Buck Syndrome” (the idea of male rats being couch potatoes) is more often the result of owners not providing enough for male rats to do based on this misconception, creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. The one exception to this is that male rats are more prone to back-leg paralysis in their old age, and may need more ramps and sitting levels as they age. I also want to end this by plugging two rat care channels on youtube: The Rat Guru, and Emiology Both these individuals are far more experienced rat owners than I, and they both have a whole bunch of videos addressing specific rat care topics and common questions. I also love the website ratbehavior.org; it’s got great information on how rats perceive the world, and what rat behavior means, written from a biology and behavioral science perspective.

EDIT: I almost forgot a really critical one! It’s not really a “care tip that differs for mice” since the same is true for them, and I’m pretty confident I’m preaching to the choir here, but, just in case, Please avoid getting rats from the pet store, especially big box places like Petco or Petsmart! These places breed and house rats in inhumane conditions that should not be financially supported, and rats purchased at these places are going to have shorter lifespans and be much harder to socialize to humans. I recommend looking for reputable rat breeders in your area and adopting from them, or looking to your local humane society or small animal rescue for adoptable animals.

#long post #ratblogging #Anonymous

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lavenderek · 3 years

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I'm not sure you got the point of my original ask though. Instead of Lindsay Ellis addressing her racism and centering the voices of Asians, she made an hour long video about "cancel culture." She effectively steered the conversation away from how racism affects Asians and centered herself and her platforms as a white woman.

I understand how harassment is bad. However, when you pave over the original problem and center your position of power/influence and how people like to be mean to you on twitter dot com, you're not raising awareness for harassment. What you're doing is you're actively still being racist by minimizing and dismissing the systemic oppression you participated in.

People who fall for this misdirection trap and perpetuate the misdirection trap need to do better about being aware of their own problems with racism. The problem was never about getting cancelled on twitter, it was always about her making racist comments about Asians in the middle of a hate crime epidemic against Asians.

But you have a good night too. 🥴🥴🥴

oh, ok. i'm actually gonna reiterate that all of that was addressed in depth - and i mean in depth. she discussed all of that and addressed like ten of the incidents in her callout thread individually. she talked specifically about each and every one of the things you just said, including steering the conversation away from asian people and positions of influence. she talked about how as a white woman she is not exempt from american white supremacy. she talked about literally all of that in excruciating detail.

i had three reasons that i didn't engage with you, and none of them is that i think "cancel culture" is about targeting poor, innocent racists or even that "harassment is bad."

the first reason is that in this case i simply don't believe what's going on is warranted. it's a bad time to be seen as belittling an asian thing during a time when anti-asian hate crimes are on the rise. i don't think she was belittling that movie or those tropes, and i don't think that counts as being "blatantly racist."

if you feel like comparing that dragon movie with avatar the last airbender is the last straw on a racist camel's back, then that really is, as you said, your prerogative. no hard feelings here - you're obviously not alone in that interpretation. i just don't agree! i think there is and should be a firm distinction between being a dick online and being a bad person online. some people are just irreverent, as a personality.

the second reason i didn't engage is that nothing i said really had much to do with what you said. you saw me saying i agreed with what she said and assumed i was in full support of her. you told me being racist doesn't make her a victim, when i hadn't actually said anything in support of her except "i agree with what she said about cancel culture."

this led me to assume you didn't know what all she said in the video, but that you weren't planning on watching the thing because clearly you were fed up with her. i can't blame anyone for not watching a feature length video where a person sits in front of a camera and talks. what would telling you to watch an hour and a half symposium from somebody you hate do aside from making you angrier? what would arguing the points with you do aside from making me look like an asshole who loves racists? if you wanted to watch the thing, you would.

what i talked about at length was people who cheer when someone gets deplatformed and then spam tags with "jenny nicholson next." i yammered on about that and then went on a tangent about a girl at my high school who got pizza thrown on her car. i talked about this for a total of thirty tags, and you still saw all of that and understood "lindsey ellis is correct and cancel culture is insidious and we must protect the racists," because you were angry at her and feel strongly about it. i talked for the max length of tags allowed and you still thought i was saying something else.

and i don't mean to say you like, jumped down my throat!!! or whatever lmao, you've been very articulate and calm and in a context where i believed that what she said had been racist, i would agree with you vehemently. the issue here is that if i'm talking about what she said in the video, and you're taking about something else, then we aren't having a conversation, you're trying to teach me something and i'm defensively saying i already know. you know what i mean? i'm not going to say what you want me to say because what you want me to say is based on her video being about something it's not.

the third reason i didn't engage is that you're not saying anything i haven't said myself before. you were preaching to the choir.

while you're here, for the sake of clarity, here's what i feel about "cancel culture." is it a problem for people to be held accountable when they say shitty things online? NO. is it a problem for individuals with a very small amount of clout to be held to standards that politicians should be held to? yes.

you say she's got power and influence - i don't think she does. she is a youtuber. she's published a novel, but she's never expanded outside the realm of her niche online. that emma girl with the coffee has entered the world of fashion. james charles is a staple in the beauty industry. lindsey ellis hasn't done anything close to that. she doesn't have meet and greets. she doesn't get invited to louis vuitton shows. she's a film school grad who talks about movie tropes, and movie tropes aren't a bad thing.

making callout threads for racist politicians doesn't do anything, which is demoralizing. making callout threads for youtubers forces them to respond to you. so people deplatform youtubers because they are accessible. they do it because it gets results, and they feel like they've finally addressed something. i get it! i don't think it makes you a nasty person to want to feel like you've done the right thing. i don't think it makes you a bad person to say "that lady said something bad and i know it's bad."

and i don't think it makes you a bad person to feel satisfied when somebody you don't like gets yelled at lmao. that's why i talked about pizza car girl. i don't know that she did anything to earn the pizza, but i didn't like her, she was mean and annoying, so in my eyes, she was deserving of pizza car.

that's what i think about "cancel culture." it's just a crowd response that reaches a point where there is no right answer, so the person ultimately has no choice but to give up. sometimes i agree with what they're saying, and other times i do not. this is one of the times that i do not.

in her video, what lindsey says about "cancel culture" is that "cancel culture" is a loaded term, but there should be a name for this phenomenon. it exists. it's not what right wingers claim it is, but it does exist.

overall, lindsey ellis's online presence isn't actively harming asian people as a community. it's a bad time to be seen as belittling something asian because of anti-asian hate crimes going on right now in response to the pandemic. it's not cute to "clap back." and, she's right about the things she said. asian people aren't a monolith and there wasn't an overwhelming response from asian people saying what she said was bad. all of those things are true simultaneously.

does that make sense? ordinarily i apologize for long responses like this, but it's clear to me that i have to specifically address every angle of a situation to avoid being misinterpreted. that's why her video is so long, in my opinion. this post is almost as long as her video.

if you read all of this and you still disagree with something i said, no hard feelings. and i wasn't being passagg when i said to have a good night. i really do hope you're doing ok.

#haters #who is this even

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mantra4ia · 4 years

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Trixstar Imagine Fanfiction: "Three Times The Charm"

By mantra4ia. August 1st 2020. Cross posted to AO3.

One of the most aggravating things about hell was that Lucifer could still hear prayers. Like a soundproof room with a squeaky fan. Like a 'no smoking' sign on your cigarette break. Like listening to Alanis Morissette unironically. God's final joke, Lucifer lamented, was that deep in the bowels of exile was just enough awful celestial Wi-Fi to get the spam — prayers to other celestials of which he only caught the static, or pleas to the big man himself — like the bleed-over on an AM/FM radio. Which was why, when Lucifer finally heard a prayer loud and clear with the volume turned up to 11, it nearly knocked him off his thrown. It had been so long since anyone had prayed directly to him, not in jest, or begging for a favor, but earnestly and with fervor that at first it gave him a migraine. He could hardly hear the words let alone distinguish the voice behind them, until at last he was able to tune in to someone achingly familiar.

"Hey Lucifer, it's me."

Trixie, you little hellion, is it really you?!

"it's Trixie. I'm not sure whether you'll remember me. It's been a while."

You have no idea...but of course I remember you mini-Decker, don't be silly.

"Maybe you think I'm still pet sized. Well I'm not anymore."

I promise you, those remarks had nothing to do with your stature and everything to do with your intelligence, and possibly also your penchant to devour snack cakes, small human. But I admit I was wrong Trixie, you're smart and clever. It was then that the epiphany struck Lucifer: why and how was she praying to him at all?

"I bet you're wondering why I called you on the long distance prayer line. At first I thought maybe I would hear your voice answer me back, but I guess this will have to do. You see Lucifer, I may have lied to you, and I know you are not going to like that, but I hope it doesn't keep you away forever."

What? He took flight from his throne and down to lowest depth of hell scape, trying without success to fully find his footing among the chasms, his knees imperceptibly shaking —though he knew not why — while his feet took hold of him though he knew not where to. As if beckoned by the siren sound of her voice, he made his way through the winding onyx labrynth, turning where her voice waned and proceeding again where it renewed in strength.

"Because I didn't lie-outright-lie. I just didn't tell the whole truth. I've always known you were an angel, like your brother Amenadiel. Just that you live in different places. I wrote a whole bunch of letters over the years, but the post office told me Hell wasn't a valid address, and eventually they started making fun of me behind my back for not having enough postage."

Well you should have tried sending it via the DMV. Honestly, Beatrice, I have any number of portals there. A whole network really.

"Anyway, I figure where you are it might be lonely, so I guess this is as good a time as any to catch up."

Out with it then, what's the sitch child?

"I just started driving lessons, although they're not as good as yours." That's my girl. "And Charlie's doing great, he started playing soccer." Please don't tell me Linda had him play keeper to keep an eye out for infant angel powers. "He's the goalie." Christ, I bet she put him in a helmet too. "I was mad at him for a long time, I know he's only little, but I was angry that he couldn't remember you like I remember you. He even asked me if you were my imaginary friend." Does he really not remember his Uncle Lucifer? "I know, kids are dumb. But I'm not mad anymore. I drew him a picture of you in my art class...and my detention after I didn't do the actual assignment in art class, but still-lifes of fruit are boring. It doesn't look like my old drawings on the refrigerator from the last time you were here, if that's what you're worried about. And it's better than Amenadiel's stick figure drawings. If I'm being honest, I wanted to make sure I remembered you too. Maybe one day you can tell me what you think. My teacher Mrs. Fissner says it's very good. Disturbing but good. She may have sent me to see the social worker. Mom misses you. I miss you too. Listen Lucifer, I'm sorry I didn't reach out sooner but...never mind, I guess that's all for now...."

No, Trixie. You're the first human voice I've heard in a thousand years who isn't begging for mercy. Don't, please, Lucifer pleaded.

"It's just that I don't really believe in prayers. I mean, I think they're kind of stupid..."

You're preaching to the choir Trix. I couldn't agree more, this rare instance being a timely exception.

"...because people somehow find a way to make it all about them, and what they want, when they should really be listening."

Oh damnation, don't tell me you've turned into a theological scholar, or did Amenadiel put you up to this? Fess up. Could you sound anymore like your mum, you're the second oldest young person I know. Where is the Beatrice who could extort people for cash, lay waste to my flat in a single pirouette, and inhale chocolate like I inhale controlled substances? A haunting thought ghosted over Lucifer's nostalgia. Did I miss all your formative years?

"And I don't want to do that, because I don't want to torture you."

Lucifer's step faltered as he slid to the ground against the ravine walls, at last overwhelmed by the whole absurd, miraculous encounter. All the days upon days he'd spent torturing souls without missing a beat, and Trixie was worried about torturing him? About how her struggles might affect him? His chin sank to his chest, and Lucifer cried.

"Mom didn't tell me you went back to hell, because she doesn't know that I believe you when you said you're the devil, but she did tell me that it's important and that in your new job a lot depends on you. I didn't want to hurt you by asking you to come back when I know that you can't. But this life is really important too Lucifer, and...it's mom. She's got a new friend."

So that's it, Lucifer thought in resignation, that's why she's praying.

"I feel lost between them. So I asked God to send me an angel, the nicest angel he had."

You've got to be kidding me? Is that what I am now sloppy seconds, I'm not even first on the prayer chain!

"Except I'm pretty sure I already used up that prayer when he sent me you."

Lucifer's din of thoughts fell into silence as he hauled himself up to full stature, trying to pull himself together. I can't help you Trixie, your mom deserves to be happy. Chloe deserves to share her life with someone who makes her feel as special as she really is. And God help me, I can't believe I'm saying this, but it would help if you showed her a little grace.

"So I was hoping Lucifer, that you could please come back and show my mom this isn't the right guy for her. I know you're the only one who can."

Not if it puts you both in harm's way, Lucifer said, knowing that his words would never reach her, and that her prayer like a billion others before would float away unrequited.

"If you can't help me, please help her."

Lucifer stopped cold. Why would the detective need my help?

"I told you, Lucifer. I need you to understand that I've always known what you look like. More than that, I need you to know I've always understood who you are. So that you'll believe me when I say I know that my mom's friend, the one that looks like you, isn't really you."

It was only then that Lucifer realized the wall he'd braced against was not a stone cliff, but a gate. He did not waste a moment eviscerating the lock.

Trixie had searched for Lucifer once, in his mortal abode at Lux.

She'd found him again within his personal den of iniquity without batting an eye.

Little did she realize that even in the lowest depths of hell she could reach him. Dad's blessings, it seems, run in the family.

Third time's the Trix. You're right urchin. It's time to go home.

***21 days of Lucifer Countdown: 21 days until season five. New content daily***

#lucifer morningstar #trixie espinoza #lucifer and trixie #trixstar #lucifer s5 #netflix lucifer #lucifer imagine #third time's the charm #send me an angel #The nicest angel you have #fan fiction #mine #fanfic4ia #21 days of Lucifer

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napuleh · 5 years

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//I'm kind of disappointed that "Yahoo Me" on that last ask meme doesn't involve our muses using old, crappy internet search browsers to google themselves? Either way--"Yahoo Me"

DRABBLES

Leave an “Yahoo Me” in my ask, and I’ll write a drabble about our characters celebrating something.

“I think they’re gone,” Vincenzo ‘whispers’ too loudly, fingers gripping the edge of the brick behind which they hid themselves. She pinches a roll of his back before taking a peek herself, delighted at the sight of nothing. Nobody. His little search party was gone. Finally. “I thought they would never leave, truthfully!”

“It doesn’t matter now, they’re gone- at least for a few moments- now hurry, we may not even get another chance at this for at least a week, and I don’t plan on staying for longer than I should.”

“They’re so fucking overbearing!”

Vincenzo delights in their shared solitude, although the circumstances are most unfortunate, by lighting up a very carefully-made cigarette. He shouldn’t know how to roll them so well, or so quickly, she thinks, but a scugnizzo is a scugnizzo no matter how well dressed he is, and even princelings have their vices. Before speaking up again, he drops a sack of coins into the palm of her hand. Transaction completed, tax free, baby.

“They don’t want me smoking anymore. What do I look like, a five year old?“

“You sound like one,” she teases, making sure to count out the money. It’s of dubious origin, everybody knows Vincenzo Maria can’t keep a job because of his …terrible personality, but it’s all real and seems to be the amount agreed upon. “Who is ‘they’ this time?”

“Oh, as usual, Spagna, Franza,” he counts them off on his fingers as he goes, “this stupid Milanese, Garibaldi. I don’t even know why he’s up my ass, but he is now, so that’s fucking fantastic.” A deep breath would benefit him more than the tobacco he’s asked of her, but it’s nice to catch up, as well. “It’s insanity. Complete insanity. Like I’m being pulled in every direction at the same time.”

“Well, you did write to me that you were bored. That shouldn’t be the case now that you’re constantly accompanied.” Viola laughs at the sour face he pulls. “Not so much fun, being on the other side of it, hm?”

“I’ve only ever been present- that doesn’t count as participating!”

“Oh, whatever helps you sleep at night. Thank you for the candies, by the way.”

“And the delivery man?” She pinches him again. “Ow. I’m just saying, he wasn’t wearing lipstick when I sent him to you, and then he was!”

“Don’t think about it too much. That’s not very godly of you.”

“I’m not that fond of God lately anyways. I can’t find peace outside of here,” Vin gestures loosely, obviously not meaning the place (it was just a crate, a wall, and now the ashes of his cigarette) but their small reunions. “I swear, it’s like, the more I grow the more-”

“The more they try to control you?” Been there, done that. “You’re preaching to the choir.”

“You’re really terrible, Viola. I hope you know that.”

“A-huh. Make sure to mask the smell with something before heading back in, boy,” she says, ruffling his hair lightly, much to his annoyance. But it isn’t annoying enough to keep him from extending a hand out to her, physically, metaphorically.

“Why don’t you come with? There are at least three cakes,” he brags (accidentally), “of the highest caliber. I think the oranges were an import from your place, actually, so, maybe…”

“So long as you pin that on some other fellow? Sure.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. There are at least five other people in that ballroom who at some point or another have smuggled something to me. Actually, I think I could pin this on Prussia. It’s certainly more believable.”

Viola has begun to entertain the idea, and she shakes the young man’s hand…

“What did you say the other cakes were made of, again?”

Vin beams. “Oh, honey, only the finest…”

#A CELEBRATION WAS MENTIONED SO IT COUNTs #lazy historical mode here #fifteen yo vin shows no shame but tbf #it's one of the last times that he'll be able to before he has to man up (literally)#(like actually aging three to four years in a short period)#before heading off to fight a war that isn't his to fight #SO THANKS VIOLA U A REAL ONE #italitude #bs history #drabble

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pleasuresoftheduke · 6 years

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I'm afraid that I'll never find that one person who is my soulmate. I do believe in them. But it's easy to lose hope when people around you are always ignorant and not very nice at all. And even if they are.. they don't really touch my heart strings. I yearn so, but I keep being disappointed by people. Somehow I feel people don't really show real emotions or value friendship anymore. I feel my views are quite old-fashioned in that sense. If I had a friend/lover, they would mean the world to me.

Oh dear Anon, you are preaching to the choir! Seriously, did you go into my brain and pluck out my thoughts? This is a topic i’ve spent and still spend, many-many times thinking about.

I feel to a small degree this is true. I’ve had to deal with many people my age telling me that the way I act or my view points are: “Old fashioned” or “Too Extra”. I grew up in a tight community where I was friends with everyone in my school. We all had similar upbringings with parents that stressed the importance of working hard and having a gentle and compassionate heart. Though due to my parents divorce, it flung me into a new state that is completely the opposite. A transient state.

Although I have met many people along the way while living here, i’m not ashamed to say, I have managed to make only one good friend. As a result of not really having a lot friends, it has allowed me to get to know myself to the point where, I’d rather enjoy my own company instead of trying to force friendships.

At the end of the day, I realized that, I can’t allow myself to get hurt by other people. People will say what they want to say, or act how they want to act. The only person you can control is yourself. If you don’t like how others seem to behave, then make sure you never become like that. Focus on you. Make sure you keep your gentle heart and values. Don’t stop being a die hard romantic. Work on polishing up your soul to be the best person you can possibly be, because when you do, you will be so radiant in character, that others will come to you. Not only that, but you can be the best possible version of you for your future soulmate.

I can understand your frustration with trying to find good friends, or trying to find your one true love, but don’t stop reaching out to people. If you stop trying, it’s like you’re closing yourself off. If you close yourself off, then you might miss out on wonderful people. They are out there, you just have to be patient.

If you are interested in making a new friend and don’t mind me being a sappy romantic dandy, then I would be more than happy and excited to get to know you Anon. Please don’t feel shy! I am always open to the possibility of new friendships.

Cheers!

#Ask the Duke #Anonymous

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