#I know there was also civil war and shit this is a joke

[fulcrum-art-fox]

The fact that Mandalorians apparently do child fight clubs for training explains a lot about both Satine “extremist pacifist” Kryze and Bo-Katan “joined a terrorist group as a teen” Kryze

#they just took it to opposite extremes #I know there was also civil war and shit this is a joke #mostly #star wars #bo katan kryze #Satine kryze #the Mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers

[brodieland]

.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 Be you or be with you? ´ˎ˗

Percy Jackson x fem!zeus!reader Synopsis: When a daughter of Zeus and a son of Poseidon who just seem to hate each other get into a fight, they are forced to clean the stables together. Word Count: 885

The stables smelled like crap, because they were literally filled of it. And of course you had to be stuck cleaning the crap filled stables with a walking pain in the ass. Also known as Percy Jackson. So many people just love him so much. Sure he saved camp, and civilization I guess, but you didn't care. Something about him just bugged you, it was probably how he doesn't know how to listen, or how he has such a smart-mouth, maybe it was how he just does whatever and for some reason it just always has to work out for him. That luck bothered you too. HEY, maybe you were just a hater, but he was a forbidden kid and despite beating up the god of war at twelve, everyone liked him, but one time when you were twelve you accidently shocked a bunch of people in a lake and people are still scared to go near water with you. Shits rigged.

"It smells so bad in here" you mumbled to yourself.

"No shit" Percy giggled to himself, you may or may not have let out a little chuckle on the inside but you'd never admit that.

"Not the time for jokes when its your fault we're here fish breath" you spat back, clearly annoyed.

"How the hell is it my fault you decided to strike me down with your stupid lightning" he returned right back to with just as much annoyance.

"Maybe if you didn't absolutely soak me with your stupid water I wouldn't have done that" you yelled back.

"How many times do I have to say that I wasn't aiming for you" he's so stupid.

"I wasn't aiming for you" you mocked "there was literally no one else around" you are literally screaming now.

"Fine, maybe it was sorta on purpose," like I didn't know "but maybe if you didn't trip me literally five minutes before that then I wouldn't have gotten the idea!"

"Now THAT" you emphasized "wasn't on purpose, but I'll admit it was kinda funny" you started laughing a little. He stared at you straight faced as you laughed.

"Haha, I'm dying, your hilarious, let's just finish cleaning" Percy said. And with that, you both went back to silently cleaning in silence. Now in a few moments he spoke up again.

"Did I do something to you" he asked.

"What are you talking about" you said.

"You just seem to not like me and I don't remember doing anything to make you hate me so much" he sounded sad, you almost felt bad.

Maybe you did a little, because he was right. He never did anything to you, and if you were being honest with your self you were just kind of.. jealous? That was probably the word. You were both forbidden children, you thought that meant you'd both be in the same boat, but no. He's just so likeable in ways you weren't, people were scared of you because they think your dangerous but love him.

"Everyone likes you" you started. You stood there faced him broom in hand as you stared at the floor. Percy looked at you confused.

"I mean, I guess, but I'm sure there's someone who doesn't like me" Percy said.

"Exactly, you don't even know if there's someone out there that doesn't like you" you said, make Percy even more confused. "People don't like me because they're like, scared of me or something. So obviously I don't really have friends and I thought that was part of the deal until you got here and became Mr. freaking popular. You can beat up gods but gods forbid I accidently shock someone years ago." You've never shared this with anyone. "So no you didn't do anything, and no I don't hate you. I just kinda wish I was more like you."

You got quiet, he got quiet. You both were quiet. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said anyth-"

"Don't be sorry" He cut you off. "I didn't know that's how you felt, I wish you said something."

"What would that have done, other than make you feel sorry for me" you chuckled sarcastically.

"Maybe I wanted to be like, buddies or something, but you were always pushing me away" He said as he stared down at the ground.

You were stunned. Absolutely stunned.

"What, why would you want to be friends with me, I'm sure you've rumors about me. That I'm aggressive, or scary or mean." Sucks but kids suck.

"We both know there not true. Maybe you're a little short-tempered, but maybe you wouldn't be if people weren't always assuming the worst. Plus you're really pretty" He threw you a goofy grin that made you playfully roll your eyes and laugh in response.

Percy gasped. "Oh my gods, did I just make the Y/N Y/L/N laugh" he said sarcastically.

"Maybe you did, don't get to full of yourself Jackson" you said as you jokingly glared and pointed your finger at him.

"Alright then, so, is the beef over? Can we be friends now" he questioned, hopeful you say yes, really hopeful you'd want to hang out with him.

"yeah, friends. We can be friends" You both smiled at each other, happy to have put the arguing behind.

"It still smells like crap"

#percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #percy jackson pjo #percy pjo #percy series #percy jackson x reader #percy jackson x you #percy jackson x y/n #percy jackson x fem!reader #percy jackson fluff

[aleksanderscult]

Why do you hate Mal?

(TW!: verbal abuse! slut shaming! alcoholism!)

Well, long story short, he's a huge dick.

I could write three long metas about his toxicity and why I dislike him but I don't want to tire my fingers for him. 😑

Maybe because of his slut-shaming behaviour?

Oh and what is this? Ah yes, Mal being angry that Alina found happiness away from him:

I'm so sorry Mal that Alina wasn't tortured so you could feel okay. I'm so sorry that she didn't feel insecure enough to run back in your arms, needing you and depending on you like you always wanted for her.

You know, that's the thing with Mal. He did nothing to Alina.

Not when his "friend" was mocking her appearance (and yes this is serious for me because I too have a very thin body and people from my own family have mocked me for it. So it's no joke).

Not when she was apparently sad that he fucked around girls knowing that she knew.

He did literally nothing until Alina wanted to fuck the Darkling and showed interest for him.

(slut shaming her even here)

From then on he ✨magically✨ noticed her out of nowhere and he said that "now I see you".

BULLSHIT!!

According to Mal, it's okay if he fucks girls every other night but it's not okay when Alina wants to do it with a man that....I don't know. Supported her power and abilities maybe?

And he seems constantly so concerned that she has fucked him that he apparently doesn't care if she's truly okay.

What a normal person would say to Alina: "Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I'm sorry you had to go through this."

What Mal said to Alina: "FUCK TORTURE! DID HE FUCK YOU BY ANY CHANCE?!?!"

He's so unserious FR

That's his only concern. If Alina likes or fucked the Darkling (sometimes I wish she had done the latter just so I could see Mal's face after it).

Also! He's an extraordinary bad influence for Alina and her confidence! 😍

A few minutes ago, Alina decided to return to the Little Palace to lead. To do the right thing and stand in this war.

And now we have Mal threaten her: "If you go, I might not follow!!"

And that shattered Alina's confidence. Now she feels ashamed ("maybe he doesn't want me", "maybe he'll leave me") and after that passage when Mal exits the tent, Alina starts thinking "What am I doing? I'm no soldier, or Saint. How will I make it?"

Mal is an influence that constantly wears her down emotionally by making her doubt herself, making her have guilts and making her thoughts come back to him constantly ('cause he's always "What about me?? Think of me!! Look at how shit I feel!!").

Again, he makes the whole matter revolve around him.

There is a civil war ongoing and Mal is like "Okay, but what about me, Alina??!!?!"

LIKE BRO NOBODY GIVES TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU!! THERE ARE PEOPLE DYING HERE!!

And another toxic trait of his. Apparently, if a woman says "no" to him, it's unacceptable:

(The first passage is when Mal tried to kiss her but Alina saw the Darkling behind his back and the second one is when Alina saw Mal kissing Zoya, btw)

He gets angry for the fact that Alina withdrew from his attempted kiss. And apparently he "knows what that means" because every girl he had ever kissed was willing to him.

I'm sorry, Mal, for the fact that a girl changed her mind at the last minute.

If a girl changes her mind, then you must respect that. Not shout at her. NO MEANS NO, MAL.

Mal is that type of guy that throws you in bed, you kiss him and all, and at the last minute when you change your mind and don't want to go for it (for whatever reason the girl might have of course) he gets angry and says "BUT YOU SAID "YES" TWO MINUTES AGO!!!"

He gives me the ick for real, guys.

And, of course, his fury for Alina's power and status. Because, since she gained them, she's no longer depended on him.

Yes, people. Mal wanted to take out a piece of her soul essentially, so he could have her! Romantic!! 🤩🤩

Also, the fact that he was constantly looking like shit in S&S because he was drunk every night is also selfish of him. Mal was Alina's personal guard and protector. One of her three closest ones. By doing this, by having this behaviour, he gives a VERY bad image to Alina.

Imagine what the nobles would think if they saw him this way. The power of image is everything. Nikolai knew it. The Darkling knew it. Even Alina came to know it. By having one of your protectors drinking heavily all night, get into fights and look like shit makes Alina feel embarrassed for the image she gives to the other people. And she was actually in a very delicate position at that time, because she had to gain the trust of the King, his counselors and nobles. Mal should know better than embarrassing her.

Imagine if you were in a high position for the first time in your life, trying to make an impression so everything could go alright and, in the meanwhile, your guardian walks around drunk.

This is not good. In today's world, they fire such people from their work.

And all these bullshit from him in R&R saying "I told stories of you from your childhood so they could see the real Alina" is also bullshit. Bitch, if you wanted to do something good, look respectable for the part. If you want to cry and drink kvas 24/7 then resign, lock yourself up and do it. Don't embarrass your boss.

Also, Bardugo had said that after S&S she received a lot of negative comments about Mal's character. So it's no wonder she made him suddenly all "good" in R&R. She wanted to give reasons to the readers to like him and support his eventual marriage with Alina.

Anyways, I know people will say that the Darkling was no better but, guys...

This is not a competition. Of who is better or worse.

And just like another person had once said in this fandom "The Darkling represents a fairytale character while Mal reminds you of every jerk you've met in your life"

And it's a perfect quote to describe them.

The Darkling is the type of guy we all fall in love in fiction. A fantastical character that does bad deeds but still you swoon over.

While Mal is that asshole you met in high school treating you like shit. That boy you were seeing in corridors flirting with every girl he saw and being a fuckboy. That relationship you had that undermined your value.

Mal is a character that hits very close at home for the readers (with his actions and personality).

This post about him and M*lina explains my thoughts perfectly.

Go read it when you can, guys. It's an incredible mini meta.

#fuck that man #reminds me of a relationship my sister had with an asshole #so his character really hits close at home for me too #FUCK! HIM! #the Darkling should be redeemed by the very fact that he wanted to kill M*l #Aleksander + the readers 🤝 wanting to obliterate M*l's ass #anti mal oretsev #anti mal #anti malina #grishaverse #shadow and bone #siege and storm #ruin and rising #grishaverse trilogy #alina starkov #the darkling #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova

[just-late-roman-republic-things]

Is there an argument that Sextus Pompey is one of the most underrated Roman generals? (well admiral technically)

[slams desk] He is the very definition of underrated! In fact, I think this calls for a Sextus Pompey Appreciation Post!

We first meet Sextus in Egypt while he helplessly watches from a boat as his father gets into another, smaller boat, then is stabbed in the back and decapitated.

After that Batman-esque origin story he joins the republican army, almost kills Caesar at Munda, and escapes to raise an army again in defiance of Caesar's dictatorship. This boy was fighting for the republic while Brutus was still getting his angst workouts in. Did I mention Sextus was only 22?

Army - ahem, I meant navy. Romans in general were shit at sailing, but our boy is shockingly good at it, and also very good at Not Getting Caught for several years while Caesar gets shanked and a four-sided civil war erupts in Italy.

We have Sextus to thank for Livia's family escaping the proscriptions! He gave sanctuary to them and many other refugees and republican sympathizers, especially after Philippi, and later got the proscriptions lifted so they could return home.

Sextus proceeds to kick Octavian's ass, sometimes through raids and destroying ships, but mostly through blocking Italy's food imports. Astonishingly, a lot of Romans side with Sextus and pressure Octavian into making a treaty with him, or else Octavian might end up like dear old Uncle Julius. Yep. Sextus came very close to overthrowing the future emperor with economics.

So what does the treaty look like? It looks like Sextus, Antony and Octavian standing awkwardly on wooden platforms a hundred feet apart on the ocean, because Sextus is NOT letting himself get sea-shanked like his dad was.

At the celebration party afterward Sextus' lieutenant asks "Do I shank them sir? While they're drunk and surrounded by our dudes?" And Sextus goes "Uggghhh why did you have to TELL me, you should've just killed them but now I'm honor-bound to say no."

Also the treaty lasts for like five minutes before Octavian and Sextus are fighting again. (Antony runs off to vibe with Cleopatra.)

Sextus goes ✨full theater kid ✨and starts calling himself the Son of Neptune, sacrificing horses to the sea, and wearing a spiffy blue cape. Oh, and he celebrates beating up Octavian with a commemorative coin. That's Scylla the sea monster on the right there. Metal.

Octavian continues to be an incredibly bad admiral, at one point being reduced to huddling in a cave and cursing out Neptune after a storm destroys his ships. He resorts to calling in Marcus Agrippa from Gaul.

Agrippa takes one look at this terrifyingly competent pirate/freedom fighter/Percy Jackson roleplayer, who can wreck ships faster than Agrippa can build them. So Agrippa has to build his fleet in a fucking lake that's supposedly the entrance to the Roman underworld and connect the lake to the sea, just to keep Sextus from wrecking his shit too early.

You know you're a badass when it takes an army from the gate of Hades itself to stop you.

Sextus Pompey and Marcus Agrippa have an EPIC showdown (and Sextus destroys Octavian's fleet again, just for fun). Agrippa wins because he's absurdly perfect at everything. Sextus yeets off to Asia Minor where one of Antony's lackeys executes him.

And you'd think that would be the end of it...but...

400 years later Emperor Julian writes a...fanfiction? in which Neptune is still mad at Octavian, and bullies him again, making this one of the longest-running jokes in Roman history.

Sextus Pompey was the last great leader claiming to defend the republic against the triumvirs, and he was incredibly resourceful, competent, and brave from a young age. His tragic backstory, flair for the dramatic, moments of honor and compassion, and the fact that he very nearly won mean he deserves way more attention than he gets.

#put him at the same table as ventidius and labienus and lucullus and sertorius #the underappreciated roman commanders club #sextus pompey #sextus pompey appreciation post #just roman asks #jlrrt essays

[shoshiwrites]

Orange sunsets for Jo & Egan? 💚

Friend, this prompt would not exist without you and your Gale senses, @mercurygray's military vehicle expertise, and @junojelli, because I have never driven stick in my entire life, much less a 1940s jeep. Prompt list here.

Bucky Egan/War correspondent OC, also on Ao3!

Somewhere between writing up her latest story and the blue censor’s slashes that render it half as long, she runs out of typewriter ribbon.

She thought she’d been careful — both in the writing and in the paying close attention to her supplies. Jo — reporter Jo, Your Trusty Correspondent Jo, she figures out her own shit. Doesn’t ask for even so much as a pencil. 

She’d thought it was a good piece, too. 

The things she does have to ask about — meals, jeep rides up to Norwich to report on the bombing runs there, woven through with conversations with the civil defense men, almost all of them veterans of the last war — those are careful things, done in uniform and with something in her voice that approximates flattery. Apologies without apologizing. It’s a relief when a Red Cross girl or two offers to go with her, the way they can talk without minding themselves.

Longhand’ll be fine, for a bit.

It’s warm enough to sit outside, in the grass, in the shadow of a Nissen hut. Overcast, as usual, an early summer day. The air smells like pollen, half like the promise of rain. 

“Hey, I know we’re short a few things up here but I think a chair might not be too big an ask.”

She squints up at him in the brightness from behind the clouds. “Major.”

“Seriously, you need a chair?”

“I’m alright, thank you.” It’s not the mud of spring anymore, at least. “Ground’s nice, on a day like this.”

The look that crosses his face seems to be considering a joke. “Where’s the machine?” He means her typewriter, the Underwood portable. Sitting inside.

She makes a noncommittal wave. 

“I’m sure we could figure you one of those too,” he says, even though they both know full well that hot commodities like typewriters aren’t just growing out in the grass. “Sticky keys? Bad spring? Screw loose? Space bar not doing its job? I mean, I’d still read it, but-”

“Nah, just the ribbon.”

“You need a ribbon?”

God, he’s worse than the boys at the office. She laughs, just a little. “Has anyone ever told you you’d make a great copyboy?”

If he were chewing gum right now, it’d be a lazy clack on his back teeth. “Well, not too different than what they’ve got me doing now, if I’m honest.”

“If you’re honest.”

“Jeep’s right there,” he says, even though it’s not. “I mean-”

She weighs her options. Jeep ride. Typewriter ribbon. Maybe even one for Kay or to squirrel away for later. She wonders about ration books and cigarettes, not that she bothers much with anything besides Luckies these days. Small bars of wartime soap, small, pretty tins of hard candy, boiled sweets, they call them here.

On the other hand. No ride. No ribbon. No sweets. The air’s gotten thicker as she’s been sitting here. It sounds nice — careening through the greenery with the wind on her arms. 

And he’d talk the whole time, she knows he will. 

“What’s your afternoon look like?”

“Wide open.”

She highly suspects it’s not. 

“Just the ribbon,” she says.

“Yes, ma’am.”

She’s glad she’s wearing trousers in the passenger seat, the open vehicle, the way she has to hold on to stay in. He’s used to the thing by now, he says, the way it handles, the good noises, the bad ones, the bite of the clutch. The road to Norwich is a straight line, and long, and he shouts over the wind, “oldest Roman road around! ‘S what I heard, at least.”

“And here we are, driving on it!” 

“Yeah!”

The fields run by, the rows of trees, wagons, the Queen Anne’s lace, cow parsley, clusters of daisies. 

“So, what’re you working on?”

She tells him, out here where it feels like they’re the only ones around, in the middle of the afternoon, even if they’re not. And he knows, of course, exactly what she’s talking about, the major who drinks among locals, the ones who tell stories and the ones who don’t. 

He waits outside while she makes her purchase, and then ducks into another store to buy that tin of candy, slipped into her pocket. A magazine too, a small, short thing printed on rough paper. She ought to get him something, for the favor. A beer or a meal would be the real thing, if this wasn’t just an errand. 

They walk back around the corner to where the jeep is parked, and he makes to toss her the keys. “Spin for the lady?”

She looks at him, unable to hide the confusion on her face. 

Even if they let her have a jeep, she couldn’t drive it.

“Would if I could,” she says. “Though I hate to make you take the wheel all the way back, too.”

“Hey, it’s fine, I like this thing. But seriously, you never-?”

She looks at him, maybe a little too long, trying to figure out who he thinks she is. “City girls don’t get a lot of lessons in motoring.” Like it’s 1922 and she’s got a parasol and a skirt that doesn’t let her move. Steelworkers who drink away good wages don’t usually go for nice cars, either. William’s family had cars, plural. The two of them went for drives sometimes, out to the quieter, greener spots around the city. She always felt like she was going to do something wrong, smudge something that had just been polished or cleaned.

“Why don’t you hop in, I’ll show you.”

She looks at him again. “I’m sure the last thing anyone needs is an accident that puts a major out of commission.” And she’s pretty sure her on a ship home would be a welcome relief for at least as many people as she can count on her hands.

He makes a noise of dismissal, good-humored. Kind of a snort. “You’ll be fine.”

“You can tell that to the MPs.”

“Hey, would I tell you that if I didn’t think it was true?”

No, you wouldn’t.

“If I can park a plane, you can drive a jeep.”

She gets in the driver’s seat.

“So right here’s the steering wheel-”

She’s quick enough to bite it back. You know I got to England all by myself, right?

He sees the look on her face, puts his hand up. “Just covering all the bases, Brandt.”

“Steering wheel, roger.”

“Steering wheel-” he points, “shifter. This thing-” he points to the long handle protruding from the dashboard, “parking brake. Don’t worry about that one yet.”

He reaches an arm over, down to the well where her legs are. “Left is the clutch. That’s important. Right foot’s the brake. Also important. Long pedal’s the gas, you guessed it, important, if you wanna get back to base before chow or there’s someone chasin’ you.”

“Who’s chasing me?”

“I don’t know, somebody.” 

“I’ll think something up.”

“You’re the writer, right? Now, you’re gonna start this baby up.” He hands her the keys, fingertips brushing her palm. "First turn that ignition, press the starter-” she does as she’s told, “and give it a little gas.”

It starts, mercifully, with a noise that he doesn’t wince at. “Now, if you wanna go faster than a farm wagon you’re gonna need to switch to second. But, can’t do that without gettin’ to first first.”

She’s fairly certain every window along the lane has someone looking at them, but she can’t worry about that right now. 

“So, shifter’s in neutral, keep your foot on that brake- and the clutch, yep- just like dancin’-” he sees her face, “ok, maybe harder than dancin’, unless it’s a fast song playin’-” The clasp of her watch digs into her wrist against the wheel. “Doin’ great- now, I shoulda had you look at these before we started so I’ll just tell you- you’re gonna push down good on that clutch pedal, take the shifter, like this-” 

She does, rewarded by an ungodly metallic noise and a corresponding smell. Her stomach wobbles. Nothing about his manner changes, except a handwave to get the smell away from his nose. This must be what’s he’s like up there. She’s surprised there hasn’t been a baseball metaphor yet. “You’re fine, just didn’t press hard enough is all. Need to get you some good boots like mine-”

She tries again, and the whole vehicle seems to take a cue from her stomach. “I hope you didn’t have anywhere you needed to be this afternoon.”

“Nope.” It’s clear she doesn’t quite believe that. A beat passes. “...you let me worry about that. Now-”

She reaches for the shifter again, just as he does the same, the tiniest spark of static. How, in this weather? If she didn’t know any better, she’d swear she heard something in his throat. “So I’ll handle this part now, you just focus on the clutch.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll tell you when.”

She nods, tries to look decisive about it.

“Alright- right- now-”

It bites, just like he said it would. 

“BEAUTIFUL!”

It’s almost a laugh, the breath that escape her.

“Now, we’ll try second.”

She doesn’t get too excited, because it stalls out again. But she gets it going out of neutral, to first. He looks proud.

And second gear- the second time- it works.

“Hey, see, you’ve got this!”

“I think steering might also come in handy.”

“You may be right.”

She’s not very graceful about it, but she doesn’t land them in a ditch as she slowly maneuvers onto the main road. “I think you ought to take us back if you want to get there before dark.”

He looks like he’s thinking about it. “Ah, alright. But this ain’t over.”

“Part two?”

“Third gear. On the strip. When we get back.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Kind of a requirement.”

She gets it back down from second, stops it, hands him the keys. She’s shivering a little, back in the passenger seat, from the nerves, energy. He looks over at her and smiles. “Passed part one.”

“How do I stack up?”

“Well, Buck still has me drivin’ him around so, I’d say you’re the top of the class.”

She laughs, from relief, from the fact that it’s still not raining, from the fact that she’s forgotten the typewriter ribbon in the little box in her pocket, from his smile.

“I expect you to keep this thing running while I’m up there,” he says.

She wants to laugh, but the unspoken if hangs heavy, like clouds pregnant with rain. 

“I don’t think that’s allowed,” she says. 

He glances over at her, East Anglia passing them on both sides once again. “Well, I’ll get you permission.”

It’s not even your jeep, she wants to say. It puckers on her tongue, like the cherry-flavored sweets in her other pocket. None of this belongs to us.

By the time they make it back to Thorpe Abbotts, the sky has miraculously cleared, soft and blue, the other side of the afternoon.

“Now, we can just call this practice,” he says. “For the gear shifts.”

Gamely she gets in the driver’s seat again, bolstered by his confidence.

Another stall, again, this time from first to second, but she handles it. No one’s ever accused me of having a bad memory. Quite the opposite, sometimes. 

The sensation of it runs through her arms, her legs. Something new, something she’d learned, something that might actually serve her, and not just what lipsticks to wear and how to dress for the season. Something he’d shared with her.

“I’m glad we’re not in Pittsburgh,” she says. “All the hills.”

“Hey, you’d handle them too. You’re a pro now. More practice than some of us got.” She’s a little afraid of what this looks like, although it’s not like discipline’s been the letter of the day at Thorpe Abbotts. Hardly something she’d write home about, aside from the swagger, the boldness. It meant something to her, though. Professionalism. William never thinks about any of it, she’s sure. “How about trying that third gear?”

“I hope whatever you’re missing right now isn’t too important.”

“Thought I told you to let me worry about that.”

“After dinner,” she says, unsure if she means it.

The next voice belonging to neither of them, low and a little amused, approaching. “Thought we’d have to send out a search party.”

“Just taking Josephine here for a little spin. Driving lesson.”

She shoots him a look. “An errand. I ran out of ribbon.”

“How was it?” Gale still looks faintly amused. “The lesson.”

“I told her if I can park a plane, she can drive a jeep.”

“Your ability to park a plane is questionable at best.” He smiles, just a little, before his expression is measured again. “John, Huglin wants to see you.” He can’t say what about in front of her, obviously. Jo hopes it isn’t about this. Something about what she knows of the colonel might tell her it’s not. Still, she feels guilty.

He leans over conspiratorially. “Jo, I won’t mind too much if you run him over.”

“Nice thing to say about your best friend,” Gale says.

“You’d be walking everywhere if it weren’t for me. Jeeps, bikes-”

“Sure, sure.”

“I’ll let you bring this back where you got it,” she says. “Better than me taking an hour to do the same.”

“After dinner, though?” Her mouth twitches a little. 

“Come on, you’ll be thankin’ me one day.”

“He likes to say that,” says Gale.

If the sky stays clear, it’ll be beautiful. Clear blue until late, and then pink, orange, lemon yellow. Red streaks like the sweets in her pocket, dusted with powdered sugar.

How many sunsets like that could you hope for?

“Alright,” she says. “Keep the keys ready.”

#mota oc #masters of the air oc #bucky egan x oc #basilone #sry i had to do a little cover #shoshi writes #jo's tag #motaverse #oops this one is a monster #what am i doing? great question #we talked about this a while ago and i could not help myself from trying to write it #despite knowing - truly - nothing

[best-habsburg-monarch]

Franz Joseph, Emperor of Austria, King of Hungary, etc. Reigned 1848-1916

Challenge: Talk about his reign without talking about wife a lot (impossible)

from anon:

Dual Monarchy. HELLO.

Constitution! (Italy immediately declared war after but ya know)

Survived assassination attempts

Doesn't lose territory to Prussian unification which is something I guess

Shares 2 names with Hayden

from @minetteskvareninova:

Franz Joseph propaganda (proper):

as much of a poor little meow meow as Joseph II.

also known as Starej Procházka (ask @archduchessofnowhere I promise it's hillarious)

wholesome friendship with Katharina Schratt

was there not for a good time, but a long time certainly, and unlike queen Victoria doesn't even get the dignity of an era named after him!!!

girldad (better not ask about his son)

loved the great god Mars, even though Mars did not love him back, wore uniform all the fucking time, but his actually military record was. well. gotta love a boyfailure.

conservative in principle, but smart enough to know when to fold 'dem (which is why the former monarchy didn't end up like Russia)

from anon:

Anti-Franz Joseph Propaganda: Yes, the sideburns are iconic, but when you are a reigning emperor for 68 years and your signature facial hair is colloquially named after a minor U.S. Civil War general instead, you fumbled the bag.

anti Franz Joseph propaganda: he was an older sibling (derogatory)

from @master-of-the-opera-house:

MARRIED HIS FIRST COUSIN WHEN THEY WERE BEGINNING TO FIGURE OUT THIS HABSBURG INCEST SHIT DON'T WORK

EVEN THO THE POPE SAID NO

Sissi was a babe tho i get him BUT THEN

THEN HE GAVE HER AN STD AND TOOK A MISTRESS

Didn't drink his respect cousin-wife juice apparently

CAUSED CROWN PRINCE RUDOLF TO COMMIT

CLASSIST PIECE OF SHIT didn't allow franz ferdinand to marry sophie chotek

And then literally said "thank God" when he died

Somehow still had the people's support as a poor old man who lost everyone close to him when he either indirectly caused that or just didn't give a shit

a Leo ♌🤢

They wasted such a pretty face and such a snatched waist on such a cunt

Had he stayed alive any longer and he would've been at the negotiating table at the hall of mirrors in 1918 *shivers*

THOROUGHLY UNFUNNY """""desk bound monarch"""""" stringent for protocol """last of the old school monarchs"""" and didn't even cause any nonsense catastrophes that usually accompanies this stick up the arse

68 long monotonous years on the throne then couldn't even make 69 for the joke

Fredrick III, Holy Roman Emperor, reigned 1452-1493

Kicked off the whole tradition of being Holy Roman Emperors

#best habsburg bracket #house of habsburg #franz joseph i #i did promise twink franz joseph in the first round

[t0ast-ghost]

S2 episode 21 (Patterns Of Force) I just finished a really big performance and this is my little treat.

On with it:

- What is McCoy already doing on the bridge? “I don’t know, Bones.”

- Remembering I need subtitles cause they started saying nonsense words

- A sub-a-what-ius transponder? What do you want Bones to make? I literally do not understand half the things they say

- OMG SPOCK IN A HAT!

- I’m so normal about Spock in a sweater… so normal

- Oh this is the nazi episode

- I’m so out of it cause I got bloodwork done and so watching THIS episode is gonna be an experience. Also as I wrote this I heard the singular line of, “You look quite well for a man that’s been utterly destroyed, Mr. Spock.”

- Spock is confused by Kirk’s banter for a second and then once he realizes it’s a joke he looks back at the screen and does a little (McCoy) bounce

- JOHN GILL IS?!? What

- This is disturbing

- “you should make a very convincing nazi.” WHAT?!? Why would you say that-

- This continues to be disturbing

- Spock’s done, he does not give a shit as he removes the helmet to reveal messed up hair

- The fuck is happening

- I don’t want to comment on it right now. But. Shirtless…

- You can taste the sass

- Spock’s got a real :[ look on his face

- Kirk just tearing up the bed frame with Spock.. no not in that way! You see cause they’re escaping with the transponders

- “I would require some sort of platform.” “I would be honoured, Mr. Spock.” They didn’t even think for a second about using the bed… not even a second

- SPOCK GET OFF HIS BACK

- the “oh, my goodness.” From Kirk lmao

- Jim is a good pickpocket.. fanfic writers here’s your food

- The fact that their disguises work… again

- “Now we finish the job.” She walks towards him with a gun like it’s not long range

- As soon as Kirk starts introducing himself and Spock, Spock straightens his posture and puts his hand behind his back, like awwwe

- Spock is understanding gambling, McCoy will be thrilled (they’ll get to play poker together)

- Are they “weekend at Bernie” -ing John Gill?

- “We need McCoy.” Yeah you do, kirk

- Damn McCoy gets to dress up ONE TIME and it’s as a NAZI?!?

- McCoy complaining about shoe sizes and Spock going “This is how you do it, shut the fuck up and push. We don’t have time for your emotionalism (dramatic bullshit).” Kirk is smiling at them both

- They immediately get guns pointed at them

- Jim, don’t make McCoy commit more medical malpractice for you

- McCoy’s got a gun

- “The planet fragmented.. divided.” SO YOU REMADE THE NAZIS?!?

- wait wait wait… so there’s an actual reason he did this? He wasn’t forced or controlled in some way? No. What the fuck.

- Kirk sends McCoy to “stay close to Spock.”

- When Melakon insults Spock, McCoy looks so fucking furious in the background (like sir you do this to him daily)

- “I was wrong.” NO SHIT GILL

- McCoy: Now Spock, you obviously don’t under-

Spock: Obviously, Doctor, you fail to accept-

Kirk: Gentlemen, we’ve just been through one civil war. Let’s not start another.

Kirk was right to stop them there. They would’ve been at it for weeks.

Masterpost

Episode written by John Meredyth Lucas

#star trek #star trek tos #star trek the original series #spock #s'chn t'gai spock #tos spock #leonard bones mccoy #tos mccoy #tos bones #captain james kirk #tos kirk

[somer-writes]

The Heart of Hyrule Modern AU pt 1

Alright AU dump let's goooo

Let's get some character stuff down for the 3 grown ups (not including Malon)

Time

He's a retired adventurer/hero. He's actually been knighted by the crown but he only agreed as a favor to his old childhood friend, the crown princess Zelda. He's pretty well known as more myth than man for his monster slaying escapades.

Mysterious origins abound. No one except for Malon knows how old Time is and where he's *actually* from. He is in fact from the Kokiri Forest which is a common fairytale. His mother left him there while fleeing the civil war which ended a few years after his birth.

Able to sense magic. Uses it sometimes.

He's married to Malon. When Talon passed, Malon inherited Lon-Lon Ranch. Everything is in her name. He has a coffee mug that says 'Princess' on it as a joke. They also joke he married her for the horses. Lon-Lon Ranch is small, mostly managed by the two of them and Twilight.

Time's pretty reclusive. He doesn't like to go into town. There's rumors about him bc of it, but Malon throws hands for him.

Time and Malon "hired" Twilight as a ranch hand when he showed up on their doorstep with an old ad in the paper from when Talon still ran things. They couldn't just let a kid like him out of their sight and have essentially adopted him.

They also look after the others. Their home is a safe place for the younger ones to go when they need it. Also they pay them to help out with chores (esp during the summer).

Time has issues with chronic pain which is part of why he stopped going on royal errands. His back and knees are pretty rough.

He keeps out hummingbird feeders for both birds and fairies.

Caffeine addict. Always has a cup of coffee within 5 feet of his person. Malon buys his coffee mugs. They are all jokes at his expense.

His favorite food is milk. The colder the better.

Not a strong reader. Malon taught him how to read.

Warriors

Next oldest. He's 22, just slightly older than Twi.

He's a city boy. He left his family's primary home there to live in their summer house in town. It's a big manor and he lives there alone. He doesn't really like it much but he doesn't know what else to do with himself

Heir to a weapons development company that got its foothold in the war. wealthy upbringing. His dad's been married three times so Wars has a large amount of step and half siblings he's not close to. He himself is an "only" child. He does not get along with his father and doesn't know the rest of his family well.

He was in school for architecture but is taking a break bc it got to be too much for him. He works part time at the city office as a clerk.

Doesn't make friends easily, is used to getting picked on.

Emotionally neglected/abused as a child. Struggles with being too clingy when he makes a genuine bond with someone. Lots of feelings of insufficiency

Prolific dater for a while in high school. Cheated on his partners. Had one extremely toxic ex as a teenager (theres cw worthy stuff here so i wont mention it in this post) and has been put off on ever having any real relationships with anyone ever again.

Touch aversion bc of the aforementioned. Doesn't mind if it's Wind or Twi tho. Slowly warming up to the others.

He struggles to relate or says very ignorant things sometimes just bc of his privileged upbringing but he's doing his best to learn better.

Came up in private school. Had nannies until he was 14. Nowhere's ever really felt like home to him

Writes poetry and paints. Greatly enjoys romcoms.

Twilight

Next oldest at 21. He's from Ordon which is an occupied territory of Hyrule

High school dropout/teenage runaway. Has his GED.

Orphaned, found by Rusl when Rusl was out on a monster hunt. Raised by Rusl and Uli.

Ran away at 16 after fucking around with dark magic and finding out. Saw Some Shit. Still has nightmares. He's still in contact with Rusl and Uli and they know he's safe but he's doing some "soul searching" and so hasn't gone home.

The dark magic let him go to the spirit realm. He can turn into the wolf as a result (and has to bc he gets grouchy if he's Hylian for too long). Some of his keen hearing/smelling carries over. Can see spirits. Nobody knows yet.

Tried to make a living at first as a freelance monster hunter. Got his ass handed to him a few times. Eventually blew into town as a very hungry/sick 17-yo and wound up at Lon-Lon looking for work

He doesn't feel like he deserves Time and Malon's love but they care for him like he's their own kid. He's always working extra hard to try and make up for it.

Missing his left arm from the shoulder down. Lost it to the monster that attacked his village shortly before Rusl found him.

Does not like when people offer their help when it comes to his arm. He will let them know when he needs a hand (kek).

Extremely fond of and good with animals. Also really strong once he got healthy again. Very capable on horseback, adores cats.

When he can't be found at the creek or stables, he can be found sleeping in various places around the farm. Always has cats on/following him.

Reads a lot, draws too. Fishes often. Works on his truck with Malon and Four.

Looks up to Time, best bros forever with Wars, very close with Wild

pescatarian (only fish hes caught tho, never bought)

#somer writes #the heart of hyrule modern au #im sure i have more to say about them but my thoughts are a little scattered #also theres 6 more lads and malon to get to #and eventually ill write out setting notes too #aus are such a chore sometimes XD #linked universe #lu fanfiction #i am also taking questions lol #and questions would be helpful for solidifying ideas #if you made it this far congrats

[woodsfae]

B5 s02e22 The Fall of Night table of contents • previous episode

Wow, the season finale of another season! That's 44 episodes and the Gathering in eleven months! Or a year? With the little break I took shortly into season one, and the big break I took in season two, I'm actually surprised that averages out to one every week and a bit. It's been a riot, but I'm beginning to suspect that they aren't going to fight the great war by the end of season two….a few episodes ago Lord Refa told Londo it had been six months since the war with the Narns began, and Sheridan says in the credits it's the year the great war began. So there's another six months to fill before the all-out war begins?

I cannot believe that last episode, Jack the Ripper from 1888 London tortured Delenn half to death. that. That was wild. But it only makes me more stoked to see what they do next, for the season finale! No, really, how are they going to top the whole season so far?

I'm just picturing Bruce Boxleitner sitting in a little set and his plastic helmet acting earnestly into the studio lights for some reason.

Huh, Lennier and Vir have a lot in common. And they meet every to gripe about their ambassadors. So cute. Lennier plus anyone is a winning strategy.

The Centauri arm of colonialism is spreading again, and it's been less than an episode since they took the Narn homeworld! They're doing 90% of the shadows' job for them.

B5, over and over again: "Imperialism is - hey, look at me. Imperialism is bad. Say it with me: "Imperialism is bad." It's not a good thing, only bad."

Hm, Garibaldi's take on Londo that he's holding on for dear life as the situation spins wildly out of control, since he has no fall-back plan or safe harbor that he knows of, gives him more credit than I had been.

There's more sightings of the shadows now, passed off as scary stories pilots tell each other half joking, half warning.

EarthCorps is here to meddle and get direct reports from their fashy spies.

There's pilot elitism!

"A spider big as death and twice as ugly. When it flies past, it's like you hear a scream in your mind. I saw it too."

They really must exude a visceral wrongness. Natural, or cultivated? Lt Keffer (?) is a little batshit to want to find one again. But all pilots are a little nuts (I say as someone about halfway to a pilot's license)

Hm, Ivanova sort of gets along with this EarthForce guy. Or she's charming him on purpose? She's usually blunt or bluntly professional.

A Narn war cruiser survived! Help them, Sheridan! It'll flare tensions like crazy, bring war to Babylon 5 almost certainly. But it's also the right thing to do.

Hm, the other Earthforce guy is also making an effort to get along with Ivanova. Deal with the devil shit. Join our political faction and add your rising star of influence to our cause. And oh, also spy for us and send us information on everything and everyone on B5.

Ivanova gives an excellent, very civil smack-down. Booo fascist faction in the already fascist government.

Lovely. A meeting of everyone who signed up to be spies, and they all get grilled and criticized in front of each other about the quality and quantity of the information they reported. And there are informants who inform on the informants. This isn't concerning at all.

Wasn't Lt Keffer banned from going out and doing sweeps looking for the shadows in hyperspace? This man cannot be stopped by mere orders.

Going by EarthForce Guy's mien, Earth isn't interested in supporting the Narn. Lame. And an Earth-Centauri Alliance! Terrible! Typical!

"A non-aggressive treaty with the Centauri? That's like trying to make nice with a piranha."

A great simile, Sheridan. And awww, he's having baby's first shame over one's totalitarian and morally bankrupt government.

Sheridan and Ivanova's relationship warms me heart. She got him a piece of the Black Star, the Minbari warcruiser which he defeated, to remind him that the impossible is within reach.

Way too many fucking spies on this station. Earth Force does not need to find things out this quickly, and it's disastrous that the Centauri have.

Yeah, go Sheridan! EarchForce is going to be PISSED, but he's defending B5 space. It can't be a neutral station if they bow to whomever shows up with a big warship. Plus, he's the Captain, and he hasn't gotten any direct orders from his superiors, so it is his decision!

There is tension! I feel tense! Wow! What a space battle! They do well at those. Love that Zeta Squadron went and escorted the Narn ship into hyperspace. Good relations being established there!

Sheridan: "[The Centauri ship] fired first, Mr Lantz. I have an obligation to protect this stations." Mr Lantz: "You had no business helping a Narn cruiser." Sheridan: "Are you telling me to disobey regulations?" Mr Lantz: "What regulations?" Sheridan: "General Order 47. EarthForce personnel are required to answer distress calls and assist any vessels not currently involved in hostilities against Earth. Now, it may not have been politically convenient, but legally and morally it was the right decision."

That it was. No matter the amount of Centauri blustering. It is 100% bullshit of these people to be catering to the Centauri so much. Sheridan is ordered, on pain of losing his position, to apologize to the Centauri, which is super lame.

Lt Keffer's computer's voice is fantastic. Good job, human voice actor playing a computer voice!

Sheridan's practicing his apology in the mirror is excellent.

Londo being a sad outcast in the middle of parties because no one wants to associate with his shitty ass is also excellent.

Awwww, Lt Keffer. Excellent work tracking down a shadow ship, brave and quick thinking saving the information, but bad death.

Whoa!!!! Sheridan just jumped out of the shuttle! But Kosh pulls a Dues Ex Machina! And everyone recognizes him with a local name or designation. Has this actor been in the encounter suit all along?

Huh, the inside of the shell of B5, an interesting view.

Sheridan really keeps it together. His calm acknowledgement in just saying "Kosh."

Hmmmmm. Good Vorlon lore.

A Narn in speaking with another being agrees that seeing the being of light was a good omen. Londo claims he saw nothing. I wonder how much truth there is to that.

Ivanova voice-over! We started the season with her voiceover, and I'm glad to end it the same way.

"…[Babylon 5] became our last, best hope for victory. Because sometimes peace is another word for surrender, and because secrets have a way of getting out."

At least there's a publicly released footage of the Shadows now!

This episode did a really good job of making me want to immediately watch another! Season one was great. Season two was better, and with this finale, I'm completely invested in where Season three will take me!

this just in! my top five from s02 and final thoughts before starting s03!

#babylon 5 #john sheridan #kosh: angel mode #woodsfae b5

[ordinaryschmuck]

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 made me cry three times.

Hey, that’s one per movie...Yeah, this movie’s awesome.

If you couldn’t tell, this is a very emotional film for sure, and a part of why that works so well is because it’s these characters. The Guardians are some of the most likable characters in the MCU, so seeing them go through a lot of hard stuff in this movie hits ya where it hurts because of how much you care about them. Especially Rocket, who I might not see the same way again after this movie due to his crazy tragic backstory.

Speaking of which, shit gets DARK with Volume 3! Do you like animals? Then maybe don’t watch this one, because there are scenes where animals get tortured, mutilated, mutated, and even killed throughout the film. You don’t see the REAL brutal stuff, but the implications that James Gunn puts in might actually be worse than SHOWING us. But don’t let that make you think we DON’T see any gruesome stuff in this. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 is one of the few MCU projects that EARNS its PG-13 rating, having some VIOLENT imagery and deaths. For example, there’s a moment where you see what a character really looks like, and it might just be the goriest thing the MCU has ever had, which is the biggest compliment I can give.

But despite all that, it’s still funny! Like, REALLY funny! And the jokes don’t spoil and dramatic or serious moment in the film, either...Well, except for maybe one or two scenes, but that’s NOTHING compared to films where the jokes completely harm the final product like Thor: Love and Thunder. Here, the jokes are perfectly placed, are rarely forced in, and are ACTUALLY funny. Me and everyone in the theater were cackling with laughter a LOT throughout the movie. I could barely restrain myself from belting out a laugh or two half the time.

And the action. Holy SHIT, the action! These “trilogies” in the MCU really know how to save the cool stuff for the third movies. Iron Man 3, Captain America: Civil War, Thor: Ragnarok, Spider-Man: No Way Home, and now THIS FILM all feature some of the most epic, creative, and fun action scenes and set-pieces in the MCU. There’s a hallway fight that might just top Daredevil’s due to how violent and creative it is with these characters, their powers, and how they kill people. It really does feel like James Gunn wanted to give the fans a few final cool battles before leaving the MCU forever.

Which brings me to another thing about what makes this movie awesome: It is a clear send-off for James Gunn and the Guardians. The movie makes it VERY clear that this will be the last time all these characters will be together. Hell, the credits features pictures of the Guardians throughout their journies and adventures in the MCU. The most we’ll PROBABLY get are cameos, but other than that, this is the end for most of these characters. And WHAT an end it was.

If there’s anything to complain about, there’s two problems.

#1, Adam Warlock. The character isn’t...bad and Will Poulter nails the voice I always pictured this character having. But he doesn’t really nail who Warlock is in the comics and, overall, he’s kind of...pointless. You can easily write him out of the movie and make a few extra tweaks NOTHING would be missing. Honestly, it feels like the only reason why he’s here is because Volume 2 teased his appearance and James Gunn had no choice but to...bring him in for this last ride. Also, Warlock has the worst costume in the MCU. I mean, look at this:

What even is this?

Which brings me to #2--Which is my most nitpickiest complaint: Star Lord doesn’t wear his mask. Ever. Throughout all two hours and a half hours of this film. It’s part of a bigger complain I have where characters don’t mask up as much as they should in these movies, but it doesn’t stop how distracting it is. I don’t want see Chrisp Ratt’s stupid face in this. I want to see STAR LORD.

THIS! I want to see THIS! And the crazy thing is that Volume 3 finally gives the Guardians their comic accurate uniforms, but don’t go all the way in giving us Star Lord’s mask. Not even the original one they made for these movies. Part of the fun of superheroes are their cool and iconic costumes so it sucks that we don’t get to see enough of that. Imagine if Spider-Man: No Way Home or Captain America: Civil War didn’t have Peter and Steve wear their masks for the big and epic fights, including the finale battles. It wouldn’t be great, would it? Seeing Tom Holland and Chris Evans fight instead of Spider-Man and Captain America.

LET YOUR HEROES WEAR MASKS, YOU COWARDS!

...But other than that, this movie’s a near perfect 9/10 for me.

Now, does this mean Marvel’s back on their game and they’ll be making good movies again?

...We’ll see.

For now, I’ll remain hopeful. Because while the MCU is going through a bit of a rough patch with its films and recent shows, there’s still some fun to be had. I’ll always keep an eye out for what they have next, even if it’s not always as good as it could be, it’ll always lead me to seeing...

A fun, nostalgic thrill-ride that honors Spider-Man and what makes him so awesome.

A touching tribute to Chadwick Boseman and how much he and the character he portrayed meant to others.

And this final ride that’s fun, tragic, and complete in all the right ways.

#marvel cinematic universe #mcu #mcu reviews #guardians of the galaxy #guardians of the galaxy vol 3 #rocket raccoon #star lord #adam warlock #quick thoughts #what i thought about

[soll-amca]

Do you have any Alessi headcanons for someone desperate ?🫣 Too shy to come off anon to ask ..

uHHHHHHHH MAYHAps :) Thank you for the ask! I’ve been dying to write for awhile :) !

I legit don’t know what I have and haven’t posted yet since I haven’t been on tumblr for a hot minute but uhhh uhhhhhhhh. There’s lore-dumps near the top, but it gets better near the end I promise

Obligatory song for my headcanon posts. There’s no specific reason for this song, it’s just a banger, and I’m also trying to be very normal about Walid Toufic and not put his music for every single Alessi post

Alessi’s of Lebanese-Armenian descent, but extremely estranged from his Armenian roots due to internal family issues — mostly his father facing scorn from his intolerant side of the family for marrying an Armenian woman. Despite this, Alessi was very close with his mother and, even as a grown man, regrets not learning more from her. Of course, he’s never going to admit this, no matter how obvious it may be that he tries to pick up parts of the Armenian language and culture 

Alessi was born in Beirut, Lebanon in 1951, but was eventually forced out due to a civil war in 1975. Though, what gave him the final push to leave was a falling out with his siblings. With both their parents gone, his sister going off to a loveless marriage, and his brother wanting to join the war effort, Alessi loses control of Sethan during a confrontation and turns them into children. This ends up as a strange, happy accident as he would try keeping up the charade for a few days, exploiting their memory being reverted to fake a “happy family” in an effort to keep the last remnants of his old life from slipping away 

Things end horribly for Alessi as his siblings eventually find out and oust him from the home they all grew up in. With nothing left for him, he leaves and dedicates himself to mercenary work throughout the Middle East and Northern Africa to keep himself afloat

With fourteen years under his belt by SDC, Alessi’s considered one of the best in the region. And since he’s well-traveled, he’s proficient in a majority of the Arabic dialects, so nine times out of ten, nothing got past him in Dio’s mansion regardless of where the other assassins were from

The joke is that most Arabs don’t understand North Africans, but everyone can understand Egyptians, so whenever Alessi wants to phase out of a conversation, he’ll slowly change to to a dialect that’s “further out” and difficult to understand despite Levantine being his first

Since French is a secondary language in Lebanon, much more prevalent during Alessi’s time in schooling, and especially North Africa for mercenary work. He knows enough to get around like the basics, but can’t read or write for shit. His little brother was easily more fluent than him, so he has a weird sort of resentment yet fondness for the language. Whatever French he knew definitely came back when he was chasing around Polnareff in the Sethan arc

Very, very curly hair, but he doesn’t take care of it. Back as a kid, when he had his mom, she would help him and he was basically a puff-ball, but as an adult, he doesn’t have the slightest clue on how to style it while also maintaining his hair. If you catch him when he just wakes up, or immediately after a shower, it’s seemingly perfect but then he’ll proceed to douse himself in a can of hairspray 

The gun he uses in SDC isn’t his, it’s his late brother’s. But going into that right now on why and how he even got it should be it’s entirely own post so —

Any endearment at all related to babe/baby will have him throwing up in his mouth. It’s one thing to mention a child, it’s another to somehow relate it back to HIM. Honestly, Alessi doesn’t read as a “habibi” person to me, he’s too bitter to be a “habibi” person. Albi and eini come much more easily to him as petnames to call someone

He’s a sucker for trashy American television. He used to think he was above it, but now if you leave him alone for long enough, he’ll put on TLC and binge whatever’s on. Although back home, he had a thing for spaghetti westerns even if they were horribly dubbed in Arabic

Adding to the Western trend, he was super into Lucky Luke comics as a kid. Since they were really popular in the Middle East, and the translated ones were produced in Egypt. It’s definitely not a stretch that during the 80s and SDC, his grown, mercenary ass sat down to watch cartoons of his favorite cowboy. Would Alessi hog the mansion’s TV to watch Lucky Luke? Perchance. Would he stay cooped up in his Luxor hotel room to watch it? Also perchance

Tintin was popular, too, but I think I need an outside opinion on that. If a Tintin person could come back to me about this please help

Hol Horse fascinates him. Not in an admiration sort of way, but a “holyshit a real cowboy” sort of way. To Alessi, it’s like Hol crawled out of his family television and old comic books

I don’t know who it was, but I want to say back in like,, 2016ish one of the original Dio’s Fuckhouse blogs had a headcanon that Hol was actually from New England or something, but basically nowhere near “the Wild West” or even the South. So the image of Alessi being interested and asking him stuff while Hol Horse is just,, sweating bullets because he’s not a “real cowboy” is hilarious to me

Because of what happened with his sister, Alessi’s very standoffish when it comes to love. He’ll take any chance he can get to mock touchy couples and heckle anyone that he thinks is getting “too intimate” in public, but I think we all know he’s compensating for something

But the moment someone touches him or is very direct about making a move, he flusters and doesn’t know what to do with himself. Cheesy pick-up lines will only embarrass him and he can’t tell whether or not you’re making fun of him

Having gone through wide extremities of emotions when he was younger, and then having to suppress them all as a mercenary, Alessi wouldn’t understand sensitivities. Especially since he’d have to adopt a pragmaticism in his line of work to keep himself alive — and arguably sane. He’d get confused over someone being upset over an inconvenience that isn’t “up to par” to what he went through, but at the same time fly off the handle at small things happening to him since he bottles up all his emotions

If someone cries around him, he falls into the routine of having this initial frustration, stuffing it down to not make things worse, and eventually follow through with a weird shoulder pat — sorta like “there, there”. After that, he’s clueless

#Jjba #sdc #Stardust crusdaers #Alessi #alessi jjba #alessi jojo #Ask #anon #headcanon #I don’t know how long ago you sent this in but I’m profusely asking for your forgiveness anon #Every break I have a 35% chance of spawning in so hi Muslim’s back :0 BDBJK #I would just like to say that I could elaborate so much more on the sibling falling out thing because I’ve been cooking for YEARS #I’m really cool about asks. It might take a bit but I’d love requests :) #Most of these were written at 2am ;3

[soft-pine]

my mom kicked my dad out when i was six. from then on, the time i spent with my dad was mostly spent being dragged to the car at odd hours in the morning to get driven for hours and hours (he'd never tell me how long) to get to locations that weren't revealed until the end. most often this was old civil war battle sights where the gruesome photography horrified me and the feeling that i was walking on the graves of so many people haunted me. during the car rides, he would tell me over and over how torn up he was about losing my mom. how i had to help him get her back somehow. he would say how only i was there for him - and i would have to be there for him - and i would want to be. he was my dad.

in the evenings i would sit on a crappy little cot in whatever motel we'd pulled over at and watch him drink his nightly beer to help him sleep and listen to him talk about my mom. and how it wasn't fair he'd lost her. and how no one ever really supported him enough and everyone left him and only i was ever there for him and how i always had to be cause he didn't have anyone else.

he had a list of all the people who'd failed him and all the communities it wasn't worth spending time with because they were all fakes who couldn't be trusted. but sometimes still, he'd bring me to his strange friends falling-down split-level houses with cars sinking into their lawns and i'd sit patiently on gritty, smelly couches from the 70s listening to them talk about their grievances in the other room while staring at the sunlight trying to creep under the closed blinds.

both my parents were christians but my dad didn't believe in going to church because he said it was all full of fakers. but at my mom's church, they told me that it was my responsibility to try to save every single person i met. they made it clear that in every interaction i had, i had to carry the weight of that person's whole life - their soul - and make sure i did everything to convince them to believe in jesus so they wouldn't go to hell. and i did it. i didn't want them to go to hell.

both my parents were poor. and i remember how ashamed i was of wanting things or telling them because i knew they couldn't afford it. my mom tried to protect me from this knowledge but my dad always complained how he never had money. how he wanted to get me nice things but couldn't - how he wanted to get himself nice things but couldn't. he used to ask me to give him things i had so he could have them - as a joke, he would say. as a joke. i remember the day he took me to a jewelry store to sell the engagement ring my mom had returned to him. i sat and watched the watches spin in their little display case.

i always wanted to be a mechanic. i loved classic cars. their shape. their sound. when i was a toddler, i used to put a hotwheels on the couch cushions and then crawl under the couch and pretend i was fixing the car from below.

when i was 16, i dropped out of high school and got a GED. the future never really felt real to me. i could never really picture making it there. figured at some point i'd just /stop/. but i did really like baking & eating pies.

around that time, i also started writing fic. some weird cross-over shit with self-insert characters and no intended to be shared with anyone blah blah. but it was helpful to process my own experiences. eventually, the fic culminated in the revelation of an evil, capricious god who was trying to control the whole narrative - and specifically the protagonist's sacrificial-lamb-core, chronically-resurrected suffering - and had to be broken free from.

i'm gay but i didn't know and i got married cause that's what my family wanted from me and i didn't know and i thought something was wrong with me. and i loved them, i did. because love is very big and has so much room in it beyond sexual attraction but something was wrong. and i thought it was me.

and i've been so mad at my dad for so many years but if i think about this story he told me where these bullies broke the lemonade stand he built as a kid, i start to cry. every time. and want to fix it for him and want to fix it for him and want to fix it for him.

anyway then i watched supernatural.

#i am doomed. #i will never not be like this. #supernatural #spn #you will always end up here #people keep asking my why i am so incoherently fixated on it #trying to put it into words #dean winchester #john winchester #personal

[beardedmrbean]

“Black people are reclaiming the outdoors!”

Black ancestors like Matt Reeves, black farmers, and southerners: Did you guys banned our people from the forest?

Confederates and white southerners: No, did we?

Seriously a running gag in the south that many of our elders grew up near forests and was told to go there for a few hours as kids but not too far for obvious racial reasons.

But what with this idea black people are reclaiming the outdoor

😳

Californian and northern urbanites….know that after the civil war and abolition of slavery…most free blacks stayed in the country and created communities there….and our urbanization is a very decent thing….

THERE A REASON WHY OUTKAST USED COUNTRY MUSIC AND WHY ANDRE 3000 WORE A CONFEDERATE BELT IN ONE MUSIC VIDEO!

Also the Louisiana Bayou? You know the outdoor area that is heavily associated with Louisiana black culture and Disney is changing splash mountain based off that?

Also outdoor activity like hiking been called “White people shit” by black people for decades

🙄

No acknowledgment on that activists?

Also yeah it me zoomer Huey….also queers are changing the camping scenes?

Oh yes because no one connected the dots that plenty of lgbt confessed their love or did you know what in the outdoors away from society

It not like Gay p/rn usually have a subset of “outdoors” videos

Oh…the Boy Scouts sex abuse scandals…and the jokes about  experimenting at summer camp….

Just saying when the hell didn’t non whites or LBGT people weren’t allowed camping or be able to do outdoors activities? You guys were usually there but you guys made the urban life your definitive style to the masses

I'm on a dinosaur computer that I can type on faster than the letters show up so this is gonna be short because it's making me bonkers.

If you haven't seen this before it feels like it isn't too far off of the mark to me for most any place that will write a headline about how a transgender, black, pansexual, with autism is reclaiming the outdoors by queering it up.

Because honestly nobody is stopping anyone from enjoying the great outdoors except for maybe the government when it closes the campgrounds for some reason or another.

I think they write those for filler, concept is beyond idiotic

being a biracial bisexual will not stop you from riding a bicycle on mountain paths, nobody that matters cares go camping please.

#zoomer huey anon

[tizeline]

Sorry for the question, but what's a dabloon?

So- explanation for anyone who doesn't know about the current dabloon thing:

It's a trend that started only a couple of days ago on TikTok. The original meme, the "base template" I guess you could call it, is that people would post videos or photo slied where they say something along the lines of "Hello traveler, would you like some warm stew? But it will cost ya... four dabloons" and then they would post this specific image of a cat holding up a paw showing four paw-toes:

For some historical context, dabloons (or rather doubloons) was a real form of currency that used to exist. I couldn't find too much info in my search that I spent a grand total of 5 minutes on, but they seem to originate from the Spanish Empire around the 1500-1800. In modern times they are mostly associated with pirates.

Anyway, back to TikTok! This trend escalated quickly. It started with the fact that people began joking about being in dabloon-debt after coming across so many of these posts, so people starting making posts where they were instead giving dabloons to others. So people started keeping track of their dabloon savings. The dabloon posts started evolving even more. People made "shops" where you could choose how to spend your money, some decided to become theives and would steal others' dabloons. Dabloon-cops started showing up to stop the dabloon-thieves' shenanigans.

Then the inflation happened. People started handing out crazy amounts of dabloons, which led to spiking prizes. Stew would go from 4 dabloons to 20, people became dabloon-millionares from simply one post. The Dabloon President (yes, really) made a call for action to prevent this impending economic crisis. There were restrictions put in place on how many dabloons could be handed out at once, and taxes were introduced. Some people did not like the direction the dabloon-society was going with all these laws and rules. A dabloon-restistance was formed to fight against the dabloon-government.

.... yes there is basically a dabloon-civil-war going on, this all happened within the span of a few hours, shit's wild.

People have also started making dabloon-sonas though, so that's fun!

#tizel talk #tizel ask #four dabloons #4 dabloons #dabloon #dabloon tiktok #dabloon cat

[drifting-pieces-blog-blog]

Is the original Vengeance of Moonknight run a good read?

Are you talking about the 2009 Vengeance of the Moon Knight: Shock and Awe by Gregg Hurwitz and Jerome Opena ?????

Oh boy.

You are asking me to review things out of order and ahead of schedule you naughty annon.

Trust me, I will review the heck out of this one.

If anything, the art alone is STUNNING. Opena went OFF.

It also involves a fantastic approach to his armor/outfit that works wonderfully. The colorists also went off on this series and the clash of warm and cold colors makes me very happy.

The bad guys? It takes place during a huge Osborn uprising in the comic timeline and Osborn sure is causing PROBLEMS.

It also involves another of my favorite heroes that Marvel tucks away and brings out once in a blue moon: The Sentry!

(We love Bob Reynolds in this house). He is often seen as the other side to Moon Knight. He embodies the light and sun and all that is good. He also has three sides to him (though it's not confirmed or cannon that he is a system with DID). He does have significant mental health issues as Bob/Sentry/Void.

As for the story itself….

Now the thing to know about Shock and Awe is that it takes place after the Huston/Benson run 2006-2009.

In the Huston run, we get a LOT of Marc dealing with Marc issues. Not to mention that time Marc faked his own death (again) and ran off to take care of business.

So him coming back is VENGENCE for all the shit that went down in the Huston/Benson run.

In Shock and Awe, we also are following Marvel Civil War (2006-2007) so the Avengers are also having a time and are licking their wounds and a little bitter… And Moon Knight is also a little bitter about the way that he was dismissed as too crazy to get involved…. But then again… so was Bob.

.......I'm getting way ahead of myself. IS THE STORY GOOD?

I haven't read it since at least 2010. Back then, just getting into Moon Knight, I ate it up. But there was also zero Moon Knight content out there so I'd have taken anything (ALMOST ANYTHING. No thank you Bendis/Bemis/Aaron) that was handed to me that vaguely looked like Moon Knight.

So younger me greatly enjoyed it. Has it stood up to time and the current understanding of Moon Knight? I don't know... I haven't started the re-read yet. So... Keep that in mind when I say YEAH I loved it! But I also know it had a LOT of problems.... like... a lot. But not nearly as bad as certain other runs....

It 100% treated Moon Knight's mental health as a big joke, you got a lot of violence and angry moody Marc, and anything with Avengers and Osborn is gonna get messy. ...BUT THE ART IS SO PRETTY.

...I'm sorry I can't answer your question well right now. I really need to get back into re-reading soon. My memory is absolute dog shit.

I'm taking January off from my re-reads for personal reasons and hope to get back in Feb or March.

#Ask away #talk to me about Moon Knight

[viohra]

are these people for real? I'm sorry, but this is getting ridiculous

https://joshpeck.tumblr.com/post/735811016748875776

Yeah it’s amazing the amount of brain rot that’s happening. I don’t know what’s causing it either; is it blatant antisemitism? the need for the browner person to always be seen as the victim through the western liberal’s lens? a need to be seen as not racist/islamophobic? I don’t know.

The wild thing is that all these people are ignoring some pretty glaring details

No other Arab nation is helping because no one hates Palestinians more than other Arabs. They are seen as trouble-makers, terrorists, and bad for the economy. Literally they are seen as an eyesore that are more trouble than they are worth— the only reason Arab nations “support” the Palestinians is literally because they don’t want to take Palestinians into their own country as refugees and because antisemitism is so fucking rampant in the Arab world that it trumps the original aversion towards helping Palestinians. It’s a quite sad situation but it’s not without its reasons; every single neighbouring nation that took in Palestinian refugees had a national crisis, including civil wars that almost led to each respective nation almost collapsing, and each of those nations now have permanent refugee slums for Palestinians. People are outraged that “Israel” is keeping the border closed between Egypt and Gaza but Israel isn’t doing shit, the Egyptians don’t fucking want the Palestinians in their country AT ALL.

Related to the above, Israel (was) the most accepting Middle Eastern nation of the Palestinians since they offer(ed) Israeli citizenship in exchange for the renouncing of the Palestine state and recognition that Israel is a Jewish state. On one hand it’s shit for Israel to do that but at the same time that’s just Israel, a Middle Eastern country, acting like— get this— a Middle Eastern country. So it’s not surprising.

The people who destabilise the Middle East are Islamic fanatics and corrupt politicians. No other cause— Iraq can claim the US fucked them up for sure, but even then that is becoming an excuse for them to not get their shit together. I mean Lebanon is a wholeass failed state from sheer political incompetence. The only reason the gulf nations are still afloat is their addiction to western investors.

Most the people in Palestine fundamentally on a social, political, and religious level think of western liberals the exact same way trump supporters do. “Gays for Palestine” is a fucking joke.

Israel has the strictest Rules of Engagement (ROEs) of any nation in the MENA region and the West. Seriously. They fucking redesigned how to do air strikes so they have the least collateral damage possible. They warn people via text messages and roof knocking. Even in the midst of this war they are STILL DOING THAT. We wouldn’t do that. The US/UK/any european nation would fucking level the buildings civilians be damned.

Hamas live-streamed their crimes against humanity. I don’t understand how minutes after they posted the videos, a bunch of western liberals decided “yes! This is my time to shine and cry for palestines support!” Like lol go fucking die.

Technological differences between two sides will never dictate how lenient the more advanced side has to be in war. War is fucking war. It’s not an episode of Dr Who, it’s fucking hell and if someone slings a rock at you and you have an assault rifle, you gun them down. It really is that simple, as unfortunate as that is to hear.

A lot of the Israelis that the media is showcasing in stories they are bringing up from the past (eg settlers being cunts from a story in 2018 that For Some Reason is being brought back up) are Ultra Conservative Orthodox Jews that have never and will never represent Israelis as a whole— that’s like saying Westboro Baptist Church represents all Americans as a whole.

I also hate how there will be some people that read this and think “oh you hate Palestinians/Muslims” and that’s not what I’m saying. I just think one side is a little bit more justified unleashing the wrath of god upon the other.

#ask #some people just can’t handle war and THAT IS A GOOD THING #but at the same time they also try to add their own personal morals to a complex situation that has nothing to do with them or their culture #and that just…really doesn’t work #this entire thing is unfortunate