#I just feel like a failure sometimes

[gorkaya-trava]

haha suicidal thoughts go brrrrrrr

#tw sui mention #don't worry I'm safe and medicated I'm just tired a bit #I'm just tired that my first response to anything painful is “oh cool. now I'm gonna kms” #I just feel like a failure sometimes #and everything around me keeps reminding me of that #I don't know how to heal this mindset #I'm aware that I am pretty much not a failure and that I'm just an average person living my silly little life #but I for some reason can't change the way I feel about myself #I just need therapy lmao #ofc there will always be people who hate me just because I exist #me being queer certainly doesn't help that (: #and I need to overcome this somehow #but it's. painful. I can't pretend that I'm not hurt

[uncanny-tranny]

Shoutout to all the other adults who have acne or any other condition of the skin that you are expected to outgrow or "just deal with."

Adulthood isn't this magical time where everything just disappears, and the reality is that these skin conditions are largely genetic. It isn't your fault (nor your skin's fault) that you are an adult with different skin than other people. In fact, it's neutral (and even, dare I say, good!).

#positivity #body positivity #acne positivity #i have skin redness and acne still and it actually is a neutral thing at worst :3 #in fact it makes me feel better because it gives me the (false) notion that i am genetically more like him than anybody else :) #he has the same unique features i do :) #and it's helped me appreciate body moles and non-ski slope noses and boney features #as much as people like to pretend that body image is shallow (it can be) it's still not a moral failure to be insecure #we live in a society after all and it's inevitable that society's messaging can become like a malevolent growth in your brain #it's okay if you have a hard time with the reality that your features are neutral at WORST. it's hard to swallow that pill sometimes #but no matter what just know that you are lovable and you are loved. as you are too #do what you want forever dear reader #oh hey the 'him' that the tags didn't include is my dad! not some Mystery Guy lmaooo

[alackofghosts]

hello good morning everyone

#we had a tech failure at work and it just got sorted and boy do i not feel like working #Alisaie Leveilleur #fanart #speedpaint #i draw sometimes #Final Fantasy XIV

[thymeofarrival]

Gem’s bloodlust is genuinely scary and unsettling and I adore it and her so much

… I hit tag limit on this and I’m not even close to done spilling my thoughts in the tags so I’m going to post so I can copy my tags into real text and keep writing them

#I can’t imagine facing her as one of the uninfected when she’s got my heart rate up just watching from her perspective #she’s a hunter #I’ve written something before about how she talks about murder in the same excited tone as cute decorations #and people sometimes underestimate her because of it despite her reputation as a good fighter #but she’s not a fighter she’s a predator #she’s a hunter and even watching from her perspective sometimes it feels like she’s hunting me #she’s hunting All #and it’s exciting and fun for her #and she needs her pack to some extent but when it gets too big she needs to split off again #idk what’s going on in these tags it’s just. hnnghhh. Red Gem #or even before she went red #just bloodthirsty predator gem reveling in the thrill of the hunt #it’s not nearly as much fun on your own but once you’ve killed a couple people to your side and have the numbers to terrify people #you can do that. you can circle around your prey and corner them and terrify them before you kill them #and it feels like power and it feels like a game and it feels like fun #because it’s not life or death it’s success or failure #but maybe everything is a game to a creature like gem who hops between worlds at will #what if she could leave secret life at any time #like she could hop between empires and hermitcraft at any time #if she can leave then she really is just there to have a chance to enjoy the hunt in a setting where it’s expected #encouraged even #death games as a way to satisfy her bloodlust so it doesn’t spill over someplace where it might Actually Hurt #death games to take the edge off #death games to get a chance to reveal the fangs behind her grin and the sharp points of her antlers #we call her a deer because that’s the closest thing our minds can connect to her appearance #but she’s always been a little too Other for that #oh and now the Void has taken root in her too #it’s claimed her eye and arm #maybe it helped guide her aim #or maybe she’s always been a creature of the space between worlds (what with the way she hops between them)

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

I think Shiro is bad at cooking in a “overcooks everything out of paranoia about raw food and giving someone food poisoning” combined with “I’m busy and need food cooked fast so we’re putting the stove burner on 7 instead of 5” way so everything he makes is a little charred and a little tough and dry and over cooked and he’ll eat it but no one wants him cooking for them ever. I think he does better when recipes have very specific descriptors of how you know it’s done. “Turn off when bubbles form” type things. He’s okay at baking when it has specific directions, or when it’s “when a toothpick comes out clean” but if it’s “golden brown around edges” he will second guess if it’s golden brown or not and burn the cookies. I think he loves appliances like instapot or rice cookers where you dump ingredients in and push settings and it comes out done. Don’t make him make decisions about if food is done he will overthink it and err on the side of caution and burn it.

#Voltron #shiro #holly v*ltron tag #listen I think he is bad at cooking but he is an adult like he can feed himself to an extent #he is just bad at it #listen I think it is funny that he is bad at cooking but he needs to be bad at cooking in a way that makes sense with his character #Shiro’s strategy is you can’t give your teenager salmonella if the chicken is over cooked and a little charred #meanwhile Keith is fully capable of digesting raw meat #I think kind of failure at cooking would make Hunk feel even worse bc when Shiro helps in the kitchen he is trying so hard but it is #difficult to convince him that sometimes food finishes cooking in the pan out of the oven

[leosmasktails]

Just saw Mutant Mayhem and I absolutely loved it, it was really fun and captured Gen Z really well without making it too cringe lol

(Rise is still on top for me though there’s just something about it)

But holy fuck it really showed me why I kin Leo so much to the point I literally started crying about real life stuff when I got home…

Like in the beginning when Leo was super nervous about rebelling or just upsetting Splinter and his siblings just thought he was being lame kinda thing? Pshh yeah no I definitely don’t understand that feeling whatsoever 👀

Nah for real though it kinda opened my eyes and made me realize I probably need a therapist and I need to start confronting people when I’m upset about something…

#leosmasktails #leosmasktails personal #leosmasktails rambles #mutant mayhem #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt mutant mayhem #teenage mutant ninja turtles mutant mayhem #save rottmnt #save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #I have been crying way too much and I have no motivation to do anything and I feel like everyone in my life hates me… #UGHHHHHHHH #sigh #oh yeah also I don’t like upsetting my parents out of pure respect for them #they are my number 1 supporters and I love them more than they know #I just feel like a failure sometimes ngl #like what am i doing with my life? #idk man #sorry to get all angsty I never talk about my feelings bro 😭

[shrikeseams]

Thinking about some of the meta I've seen about the flight of the Noldor (and I'm not vagueing anyone, I've seen this kinda thing a few times and from folks I don't follow, so they've already trickled out of my head, sorry, bit it's not personal)--ANYWAY. The thing is that there's an underlying assumption that the noldor should have trusted the valar, because the Valar told them that the Oath couldn't be fulfilled and that they couldn't win against Morgoth, and that was ultimately proven correct.

But like. The thing is. The Valar had just proven to be incredibly fallible.

The wonderful Light that drew the elves on to Valinor? That they built their lives around? That's gone. And it's gone because the valar just very publicly screwed up. It's gone because the Valar released Melkor, and fucking told the elves that he was trustworthy, and they were extremely wrong. The Trees are dead because they couldn't bring Melkor back into custody in a timely manner. None of this inspires confidence in their ability to deal with Melkor in the future.

Finwe is dead because the Valar were wrong.

Valinor has been proven to be unsafe because the valar were wrong.

(Arguably the kinslaying at Alqualonde is further proof that the Valar can't keep Aman safe against elves, let alone one of their own number.)

Feanor called it on Melkor. Feanor was proven right to build fortifications, even in Aman. Feanor was proven right to make back-ups of the Light, even if it was stolen. (Just because he wasn't going to hand them over for Yavanna to crack like eggs doesn't mean they wouldn't have been put to good use.) Feanor has been trying to leave Aman for a long time, and right at that crisis point he looks like a great bet. It would have looked like he'd seen it all coming, and that the Valar had invited disaster into their own home.

Hindsight is 20/20, and during the Darkening Feanor looks like a damn oracle. Why would they believe the Valar at that moment? The Valar have just lost an INCREDIBLE amount of face and authority. Trust is very easy to break and very difficult to rebuild.

#Tolkien #Continuing the tradition of talking out of my ass #But tbh I stand by this one #It's not countertextual. It's just recognition of human nature #Or elven nature in this case #But the choices made in the Silm typically feel very human to me #Tbh I think the Valar never really *regain* that authority #Maybe with the Vanyar #But between Alqualonde and the drowning of beleriand? The failure to take sauron into custody? Numenor? #I don't think they get much public back-talk (they've proven too dangerous for that) #But it's hard to trust a political OR religious body that fucks up so enormously and publicly and whose failure invokes such violence #Especially for anyone who didn't make the Journey or who wasn't raised in Aman itself #Tbh I suspect a lot of the elves of ME see the Valar like I see the democratic party (us politics) #There's no doubt to me that they are *better than the alternative * #And sometimes they'll do something very helpful! But they do not actually have my best interests at heart #They are useful. They are better than the alternative. And they are not worthy of true unfaltering trust. #San shoots the breeze

[bunnyreaper]

does anyone else ever compare themselves to other writers here? wonder if you're good enough + if you should even bother trying sometimes?

i know they're silly thoughts but sometimes my brain just 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

#its probably the lack of sleep talking #but sometimes i just think i shouldnt bother #which is stupid i know #and im so happy for my other writer friends fr!!!!! its not like im not #i wonder if anyone ever looks at me and feels the same #silly brain!!!!!! #also im so behind on answering asks too d7bk7dtjjbb #i feel like im failing ??? #at running a blog lmao #sorry everyone for the temporary failures

[1tsjusty0u]

zelda is done. so dirty sometimes

#like. either A her things are attributed to link (ive seen a comic where rhoam scolding zelda for her failures was made to be a comic about #link and like. he wasnt even talking to him!!!!!!!!! theres other ways you can show that and other ways that include rhoam considering he w #as on the great plateau but They Didnt??? and also silent princesses and such but thats a ship thing i think? #or B they blame her for things that literally were not her fault and she couldnt do anything about #(seen someone in a theory video blame zelda for everyone dying because ‘link using the shekiah slate would open the shrines. is she stupid’ #paraphrasing but that was the gist. shrines dont even work that way theyre just Wrong #or sometimes shes made out to be stupid in general #like listen. im not a zelda character fan. i dont love her and i dont hate her. but Come On #you dont have to be obsessed with her or even focus on her in what you make just . Respect her i guess #it feels weird to say because shes a character. however i dont know how else to say it

[skyward-floored]

Don’t say that! I love your writing so much!!! There’s nothing wrong with sticking to canon, and the way you write all the characters is amazing! You have such great characterization and the way you write emotions is just incredible!

Your writing is absolutely incredible, even if you may not believe it yourself you contribute a lot to this fandom and I know you’ve definitely made some of my awful days better just because I read some of the things you’ve published. Every time I see you post I get excited because I love your content so much!

The things you create are valuable and lovely because they’re yours! They are wholeheartedly and entirely yours! That is what makes them amazing! It makes it unique and beautiful and no one else can make it!

I know it’s hard to believe and your mentality won’t change just because I, one insignificant person you’ve never met, said this, but I hope someday you can believe it.

Until then, I (and so, so many other people, I imagine) will remind you as many times as you need. I hope you have an excellent night and I offer you hugs 🫂

Ohhh anon

I was having a moment of self-doubt and getting frustrated with my writing so I decided to go do something else, and then I come back and see this lovely message that makes me cry 💖

You’re so sweet anon, thank you so much for your kind words. They mean a lot 😭

#it’s just #hard sometimes #to remember people do like what I write #and I know I know I’ve been posting stuff pretty regularly lately #but like #I truly haven’t updated any of my longer stuff in what feels like forever #and that really depresses me because I feel like I’m letting people down #even though I know I should take my time #I guess it just makes me frustrated I can’t keep to a regular schedule even though other people seem to manage it fine #idk #plus how I stick generally close to canon #I guess it’s just hard to remember people enjoy that and don’t mind waiting #even if I tell myself I’m a failure for taking forever to update stuff #but all that to say #I really appreciate you anon <3 thank you #answers from the floor #anon

[gayleafpool]

an idea i have always found interesting is that the reason spottedleaf took such an interest in leafpool is bc leafpool looks like her (maybe not coat color but like. leaf is pretty and dainty like her) and also just kinda sounds like her or had similar vibes idk and leaf is also not really very much like either of her parents so spottedleaf felt she could more easily imagine leafpool as her own daughter. and i mean this in a weird and messed up way not a sweet way

#she was so weird with leafpool. acting so kind and then turning around and deliberately setting her up for failure #sometimes it felt like she cared for leafpool and sometimes it felt like she just wanted to punish her and watch her struggle for some #unknown reason #so i think the idea that she had these weird and complicated feelings around her would make sense

[zhongrin]

Hello Miss Rin!!! Came back for another tea party because life's absolutely been kicking my ass lately and I've been taking the hits. (Such as crying) Anyway. How would you think wrio, Haithie and Li would respond to a S/o who's getting their ass kicked left right and centre for a pretty long time now and aren't sure what to do in life cause everything seems pretty clouded and whatever they'd planned years back , nothing has come to fruition? A depressive ask but you know I'm the king of angst <3 sending you lots of love!

hiii aether! pouring you tea and patting your head. take care of yourself okay? i'm sure you're doing great, you just need to take breaks and be kinder to yourself ᰔᩚ

i feel like they all would be super supportive in their own ways!!

zhongli's always there to listen and offer advices (and he's good at giving comforting words and advices after living for so long!) over some light, relaxing tea. and al haitham strikes me as the type who can provide you a very rational and logical input to any issues you have ー he might be a little blunt, but you'll notice he does try to word his sentences gentler when he picks up on your obvious distress! as for wriothesley, he's also smart in his own way so i can see him trying to work it out with you by brainstorming possible solutions together, but if you need him to just hold you close, he's a big cuddly bear!!

lastly, my own advice would be to say that ー no one knows 100% what they want and where they'll end up in life. there are too many factors that could mess up even the most meticulously planned plan. just accept that sometimes, things work out, and other times, things don't! and that's okay!! life isn't an exam where you can fail and that's it, you're doomed for life, nor it is a path laid out in front of you to follow ー that's not how life works. and even if that one door closes, you just have to find other open doors. there's always more to life and its meanings than that just one single success or breakthrough you're hoping for.

#rin answers #rin is having tea with: theprinceofkhaos #a friend of mine who's been working to become a doctor just failed a $5k exam the other day. it's been i think close to 10 yrs that- #-she's pursuing this career. and now she has to either retake the exam (so another $5k) but if that also doesn't work out she'll have to- #-give up on gp and do other things. it's a bitter pill to swallow but... this is how life is. #i have my own countless unfruitful endeavors too. it sucks that things don't work out but sometimes it's a stepping stone for you. or- #-sometimes it feels like it's a complete waste of time and doesn't have any significance. but that's okay. at least now i know that's not- #-the path to take yk? your failures shouldn't define you. it's okay. it'll be okay. just keep doing your best and try to make the best- #-choices and take the best chances you have. it's cliche. but you will find your way.

[noisytenant]

i think computer literacy is a critical set of skills and that being able to have and use a personal computer has a lot of obvious benefits. more than just being able to navigate a digital environment, computers structure information in an intuitive way--one learns abstract, hierarchical thinking through the process of learning to use the computer. additionally, basic troubleshooting can go a long way in teaching problem-solving strategies.

also, the shift toward mobile devices is one that heavily restricts user control, disempowering users from having the agency to change their digital environment and take calculated risks. especially with the increase in cloud-based file hosting, users are often unwittingly putting their lives in the hands of demonstrably untrustworthy companies. there are many reasons to challenge the dominance of mobile devices.

but i feel pretty annoyed when i see posts scandalized about how Young People These Days only know how to use their phones and can't navigate a desktop to save their lives. i think we adults who grew up around personal computers can be so caught up in how critical they are to our daily lives that we fail to respect the subjective experience of those growing up in a mobile world.

from an experience design and user research perspective, you need to understand the attitude and experience of the people you're complaining about if you want to offer coherent solutions. there are a lot of genuine issues with the current paradigm, but nostalgia can cloud the benefits and draws of the mobile shift.

if we treat pc use as an unqualified good, and mobile use as an unqualified bad, we'll ignore opportunities for cross-generational learning. we'll also feel discouraged by the sentiment that society continues its slow decline toward hyper-late-capitalist technocracy.

but even if a young person's only experience is with mobile devices, we can still teach them how to navigate file structures; we can still introduce troubleshooting and self-directed learning; we can still teach good typing habits (if they have a full-size keyboard). and if we genuinely want young people to have the same computer literacy we do, we need to listen to them about their concerns, frustrations, and questions about PCs. if we want them to use computers, we need to be ready to do a little convincing.

we also need to respect that some people will genuinely prefer mobile devices, because that's what they grew up using. even if mobile interfaces have very distinct priorities from computers, they aren't always worse. being able to identify the logic behind design decisions, even ones you ultimately dislike, is an important analytical skill that primes you to thrive in a changing world.

in short, i know it can be really jarring--and kind of scary!--when skills and ideas that are critical to our generation are being lost as new forces take their place. but if we genuinely think these skills are worth passing on to the next generation, we need to accept that we're in a different world now and that we need to adjust strategies accordingly. a little bit of patience and openmindedness can go a long way in connecting across tech barriers.

#indexed post #i feel like maybe this rant is unnecessary. sometimes people just want to complain and thats valid #But I feel like 'the Youths are losing tech literacy!' is such a solvable problem #But it gets obscured by a kneejerk aesthetic disgust and intolerance for the mobile paradigm #That swallows up the several distinct and actionable criticisms with a general 'mobile bad pc good' energy #And when people sort of stubbornly reject mobile draws on principle #It feels sort of like you're setting yourself up for failure #And then of course you feel hopeless because the paradigm is leaving you behind. #Forgetting how much you have in common w the new generation + how much you have to share #anyways whatever You know how I am #long post #the opinion haver

[una-hive5]

Oh I remember when I was 14 or 15 year old, I always told myself "I need to learn digital art fast so I can get more followers" but then the next day "f*ck Instagram, f*ck Twitter, I draw what I want. F*ck it we ball."

#i don't take Tumblr seriously because i thought this app are just for sh*t posting #and to write paragraph of analysis and interest #rosa rambles #it's ok if you feel bumped out sometime but never tell yourself you're a failure just because you got less likes of your drawing #hear a little advice: go outside or do chores to relax or do whatever you want #minimize your screen time

[bisan-is-trying]

Me joking with my mom while cooking: aren’t you super proud of my cooking skills!! There's no match for me!! Im unstoppable!!

Mom in a solemn voice: but im really disappointed in you

Me: ????

Mom: pursuing your Master's degree, it seems like you no longer care about continuing your studies, it’s like you've frozen that idea.

#way to kill the vibe mom #she is still disappointed that unlike my bachelor's education #i didn't immediately jump to a random university and study whatever random major they gave me #even though i could’ve gotten a neat scholarship and studied something i really liked at the time #at the time i had no idea what im soig and where i wanted to go so i just followed along #but im not suffering through getting a master's degree for something i dont even care about #what she doesnt know is i have a plan. i have been following the plan ever since graduation. #if plan goes perfectly im supposed to start applying either this year or the next #she has no clue sometimes i stay up really late thinking about all the decisions i made and things i can no longer change #i dont want to do the same mistakes again #also its not like i can really afford it right now without a proper scholarship #i get she wants me to be the best at everything but the way she goes about it always makes me feel like a failure #mom...

[poppy-metal]

i feel bad bc no one has done anything to me recently i just feel this worthless on my own. like i dont wanna look or talk to anyone anymore bc i feel like such a fucking malfunction of a human being.

#poppy speaks #wish i didn't exist #think seeing my stepdad fucked me up bad bc i haven't feel this hopeless as an individual in awhile #genuinely dont see the point in my being here #like im stupid im not that pretty or brilliant or fun or interesting im just literally a ball of anxiety #i can write and sometimes that's good but now im tired so i cant even do that rn #so im worthless lol #i add nothing to anyones life. im a loser and a failure and i wish my mother aborted me #will delete tmrw #sorry for being sad lately #tw: depressive thoughts