#I got an anon MONTHS ago with a bunch of ideas and I've decided to write all/most of them :) because they were all wonderful | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kalpasio · 2 years

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HELLO???

masterlist masterlist 2 request list

Requests: Kalpas

if you would be ok with me writing your ideas for Kalpas, I'm open to asks!

update: I'm still fine with taking asks! but!! at this point I have a couple and it will take me more than a month to get to any new ones so please just be aware it'll take me some time!

I will always take asks about your headcannons or my own, but any longer works are written on a whim. I do not control the writing, I merely write until my wrist falls off and hope that the words make a complete sentence.

Genuinely my interests in a character will change overnight, you would not believe the wip pile I have because my brain suddenly decides it hates the character it was obsessed with 2 hours ago

A lot of my works are just a bunch of small hcs or scenarios I have thought of or seen smashed together so if you send me hcs or I post some in response to an ask I will always try to link those to the work. I want to make sure people get credit for their ideas, even if they're on anon.

Feel free to call me Zaria or Zari (or Tamale if you're coming from ao3)

Or whatever really, so long as I can tell you're referring to me

she/her/they doesn't bother me either way

I'm a college student who enjoys writing in my free time (I know this is like code for "I'm a bad writer with 2 stories and then I drop off the grid" but I promise I genuinely write for stress relief, and I am very stressed at school so we'll be good!)

I mostly write fluff and angst x reader

As of now, I don't think I'll be writing nsfw mostly because my ace ass hasn't even been in a relationship and I want to become more comfortable with writing in general first.

That being said! I'm 100% here for short nsfw headcannons or asks so please minors DNI. If I do end up writing any smut it'll probably end up on ao3, though I will post a link here.

Speaking of asks

Asks/not-requests

If you just wanna post something, that's chill

If you want my thoughts on something, that's chill

If you wanna ask questions or talk about something I've written, that's chill

I'm not comfortable writing for or talking about minors, though there are a few characters I am ok with writing for if they're aged up (Damian Wayne or certain Persona characters off the top of my head)

Non-con is a hard no. Yandere is almost always a no. Dub-con is on thin fucking ice and usually depends on a whole lot of things.

Sometimes Tumblr eats asks!! If you think you sent something that was totally reasonable and I don't respond to it in like a couple weeks, try sending it again!

(at the end of the day, if you send something I'm not comfortable with, I'll let you know, or in extreme cases I just won't respond, so don't stress about it too much!)

Honestly I'm going to be writing either way, and I really just want to get my stories out on the odd chance someone has the same interest. Some of these stories are kinda niche or the reader has traits that I personally have or want for them. If someone enjoys them, great! If it's not your cup of tea, that's fine too! They'll be here until Tumblr gets sold off for the 57th time and loses so much money the shoestring holding it together falls apart.

Sorry for the super long post, List of games I've played below, it's even longer don't even look at it.

Fire Emblem:

Sacred Stones (ask me about Boston Grandma)

Awakening (If Camilla is dragon mommy, Cherche is dragon mom and I love her more)

Fates (Oh please don't start a fight)

Three Houses (oh please don't start a fight)

Like half of Radiant Dawn (Thank you Vimm's lair)

Heroes (You can always tell when Cuboon draws the art)

Overwatch (I have yet to play 2 and I'm not sure I want to)

Honkai Impact (HoS has modified my mind and now she and the flame chasers own me)

I am also fine with writing for APHO! I actually have a story in the works for the MC (man's got like 20 names)

Genshin Impact (Ohhh I could make a bonfire from this wip pile)

Legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild (I have like four other loz games and just haven't played them. Thank you Vimm's lair)

Kid Icarus (I used to have the biggest crush on Dark Pit when I was younger hhhh)

Borderlands 3 (2 makes me so motion sick)

Persona 4 Golden (now with graphics!)

Persona 5 (Not Royal, I'll play it when it comes to pc)

Hollow Knight (I'm not sure how comfortable I am writing this, but I love the game to bits)

Tekken 7 (I have-no joke-17 hours on this game but I am more than willing to read the wiki for some of these characters)

Valkyria Chronicles 4 (I might have to replay it)

Transistor (bought it for the ost, stayed for the gameplay)

Bastion (bought it because of Transistor, stayed for the gameplay and ost)

I love supergiant Darren Korb, I own Hades but have not played it because I know I'll be obsessed for like a month

Devil May Cry 5 (I haven't played the previous games, do with that what you will)

Anime:

In advance, I watched these like almost a decade ago so I might be a bit rusty. Most of them I really care for though, and I'll take recommendations!

Ouran High School Host Club (I'm so sorry)

Soul Eater (I can't remember if I ever finished this...uhhhh)

Fruits Basket (the like 90's version, not the more recent one. Hatsuharu ruined my life tho)

Sailor Moon (Sailor Jupiter my beloved)

Fullmetal Alchemist (Fu Hua killed Meas Hughes)

Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (I get these two mixed up, I should rewatch them both, right?)

One Piece (I don't think I got past episode 200, I will be so inaccurate)

RWBY (If you count this, I think I'm behind by a season)

I am so terribly sorry if you read through all of that. If I have something that's not listed, feel free to ask anyway! I really like making horrible guesses about characters and then actually seeing them in their game or show and finding out how inaccurate I was (half the time my guess is just "oough ladie")

#This is way too long #sorry #updated Feb 22/2024

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astorytotellyourfriends · 3 years

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Hi, I’m not sure if you’ll remember me, but it’s guilty anon again (from back in July). You were really helpful last time so I wanted to ask for some advice (though no pressure if now isn’t a good time). How’d you get so comfortable with being honest about reading/writing smut? I’ve recently got into a new fandom and I’m still nervous to tell my followers that I might be rebloging nsfw content for that (even though that’s a fandom were nsfw stuff is basically expected), let alone being honest about reading JATP smut. Im just so scared of being judged or losing followers/mutuals. Thanks in advance but no pressure if you don’t want to answer.

oh, nonny. you see, i've been in fandom for over half my life at this point and it was never really a case of getting comfortable with being honest about reading/writing smut, it's that i was never uncomfortable with it in the first place.

it honestly baffles me that purity culture has sprung up all across fandoms lately but especially with the jatp fandom and it's fucking absurd. it's perfectly acceptable to not want to read smut, i'm not forcing anyone to read my fics and this is what tagging is for, but to bully other people about it? that's absolutely horrible.

i know it's easy for me to say "you shouldn't feel guilty! read and write what you want! fuck the haters!" but it's another thing entirely to actually do it. i think i said something similar to this last time, but if people unfollow/attack you for simply sharing what you enjoy then THEY are the problem, not you. you're better off without some dickhead making you feel bad about your interests.

smut fic is one of the SAFEST outlets to explore your sexuality and it's so fucking terrible that so many people are making you feel like you're dirty or disgusting for it. once again, they are the problem. not you. there's nothing wrong with you.

personally, in regards to this new fandom you're in, i say just start reblogging things. come up with a tag for nsfw posts and use it whenever you reblog something you think needs it. even if you're not sure, you can use it just to be safe! if you lose followers or mutuals over it, i know it sucks, but they're allowed to set boundaries for themselves just like you are.

i lost a bunch of followers months ago and it was disappointing for sure, but honestly i also found it kind of funny. if people wanna get all butthurt about the idea of me writing/reading smut, then that's on them. i will never - and have never - posted anything nsfw without explicitly saying so. i'm not an asshole. i'm not trying to trick anyone into reading anything they don't want to. if they click it, read it, and then decide they're offended? that's 100% their own goddamn fault.

i hope this helps a little, nonny. feel free to drop by my inbox anytime you need a little reassurance. i'm here for you, and i know a bunch of other people are too 💛

#answered #Anonymous #also i'm hella curious about what this new fandom of yours is #i wish the jatp fandom wasn't eating itself alive #it makes me so sad

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amanda-glassen · 3 years

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The Wonder Years: Part 8

While getting ready for her first school dance, twelve-year-old Olivia starts a path toward discovering who she is truly meant to be. Parts 1-7 can be found under the the tag #alex and liv: the wonder years

Thank you @ghostwritingcabenson @imaginaryoperagloves @cabensons @oliviaswifey and my lovely anon for all of your really sweet comments and tags.

Cover courtesy of my tumblr wifey @ghostwritingcabenson

Seeing the brightly colored frozen yogurt shop put Olivia at ease because it was the setting of some of her best childhood memories and now she was going to experience it with her girlfriend.

Olivia did as Jamie had done for her mom and opened the car door for Alex. That small act of chivalry earned a big smile and a ‘thank you’ from Alex, which made Olivia feel as if she had butterflies in her stomach.

“Babe, why don’t you take Alex inside?” Jamie suggested. “I want to stay out here and talk to Ollie.” Uh oh.

“Come on, sweetheart,” Serena gestured for Alex to follow her. “We can get first pick of the toppings.”

“Yeah!” Alex said excitedly. “I want chocolate chips and chocolate brownie bites.”

“Is everything okay?” Olivia asked, worried that Jamie had a suspicion that she and Alex were hiding something.

“Everything is fine,” Jamie responded. “This is a good talk, I promise.” She pulled a twenty dollar bill out of her wallet and handed it to Olivia.

“Cool! Twenty bucks!” Olivia folded the money and put it in her pocket. “Thanks, Jamie. I was saving up to buy a－”

“It’s not for you, kid,” Jamie interrupted. “It’s for you to treat Alex.”

Olivia tried to hide her disappointment. “But my mom always pays for frozen yogurt.”

Jamie made a failed attempt at stifling her laughter. “Think about it, kid. What’ll score you more points, you paying for her frozen yogurt or your mom paying?”

“Me, I guess,” Olivia groaned. “There goes my new bat.”

Jamie shook her head and wrapped her arm around Olivia to guide her toward the entrance. “I have so much to teach you, Ollie.”

Alex and Serena were already choosing their toppings when Olivia and Jamie entered the frozen yogurt shop. Olivia noticed that her mom had gotten their usual and she was eager to get the same－chocolate flavored frozen yogurt with Oreo crumbles, gummy worms and Fruity Pebbles－a tradition in the Benson household that they had named Dirt and Worms.

“Mom, I’ll pay for me and Alex,” Olivia told her once all four cups of frozen yogurt were on the counter and ready to be weighed.

Serena took her debit card out of a pink and white polka dot Kate Spade wallet. “It’s okay, baby, I’ll get it. Save your money for that bat you’ve been wanting.” Olivia noticed her mom and Jamie exchange glances and she hoped Jamie could read her mind because she no longer had the slightest idea what to do. “On second thought, it’s probably not cool for your mom to pay for you on your first date.”

“I got this,” Olivia tried to say as smoothly as she could while she pulled out her twenty dollar bill and placed it on the counter.

“And I’m getting yours,” Jamie told Serena. “You already paid for dinner. We’re supposed to be in an equal partnership here.” After Alex and Olivia’s cups of frozen yogurt were paid for, Jamie inserted her card to pay for hers and Serena’s.

“I paid for us to eat at Hot Dog On A Stick, not some expensive restaurant,” Serena reminded her. “That’s all we had time for after Barnes & Noble and GameStop.”

Jamie picked up their frozen yogurt cups and carried them over to the table. Olivia figured she should do the same for Alex until she saw Alex already eating brownie bites from her frozen yogurt. Better not take that away from her. “I learned an important lesson today, Ser. If I value my life, I will never attempt to take one of your fries. Is it the same with frozen yogurt?”

Serena scrunched her nose. “Yours is vanilla with strawberries, blueberries, and bananas. No wonder you want to steal some of mine.”

Within seconds of sitting down at the table, Olivia’s phone started to vibrate. It was a text from Elliot confirming he'd be at their secret meeting, but Olivia didn't want to risk her mom seeing a message from her dad come through so she decided to put her phone in her pocket.

"What's this big science project about?" Serena asked them. "I've never seen an assignment have that effect on Olivia."

Olivia was in the middle of chewing a gummy worm, so she was grateful when her quick thinking girlfriend decided to answer. "It's the end of the year project which is worth 25% of our grade. Mrs. Rodriguez is supposed to give us more details on Monday, but my brother had her class three years ago and he said she lets her students pick the topic. Sometimes that's harder because the possibilities are endless. She also doesn't like us to pick partners because someone could get their feelings hurt if they aren't picked, so she puts us in alphabetical order. If she does that, it's fine because I'll get to work with Olivia. Alphabetically there's no one in between us. We should start brainstorming, Olivia."

The last thing Olivia wanted was to think about a science project that wasn't due for another month, but her girlfriend’s enthusiasm was contagious and the project was the only thing keeping her mom from asking questions about what was actually on her mind.

Olivia felt her phone vibrate again, except this time it wasn’t a text from Elliot or any of her other friends. It was another message from her dad that read, “Hey Sport. Wanna get some pizza tomorrow?”

“Who’s that, baby?” her mom asked her.

“Just Elliot,” Olivia said nonchalantly. “He’s asking if I’m still coming over tomorrow to watch the game. I have to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”

Olivia was grateful that the bathroom was a single stall so nobody could follow her in there. She pulled out her phone from her back pocket immediately after locking the door behind her and started to respond to her dad. “Yeah can we go to Another One Bites the Crust? That’s my favorite. I can meet you there at 1.”

She waited two minutes before another response came through. “Daddy/daughter day tomorrow at 1. They have those rotating basketball hoops outside. Bring your A-game.”

When she returned to their table, a feeling of guilt hit her hard and suddenly. She occasionally hid things from her mom like when she didn’t tell her she had a girlfriend, but this was the first time she had actually lied to her. It was the worst she had ever felt in her entire life and she knew that lie was only the first of many that she’d tell her mom that weekend.

Serena asked Alex about her siblings and Olivia heard Alex talk about her older brother who was fifteen and nice to her and her younger brother who was almost nine and kind of annoying. Olivia loved to hear Alex talk about her home life and her friends and her favorite movies and TV shows, but that night her mind was on her dad and how much fun the two of them were going to have the next day eating pizza and playing basketball.

“Do you have any brothers and sisters?” Alex asked Serena.

With Serena distracted by Alex’s question, Jamie took it upon herself to attempt to steal a gummy worm, but her attempt was soon thwarted by Serena gently smacking her hand. “Hey! Nope. Hands off my worms. If you wanted gummy worms, you should have added some to your frozen yogurt.”

Olivia handed Jamie a couple of her own gummy worms. “Here, Jamie. You can have some of mine. I have a whole bunch.”

Jamie took the worms and held them up to show Serena. “Unlike you, your kid actually shares.”

“What can I say?” Serena smirked. “My kid is better than me. That means I’ve succeeded as a mom.” She held Jamie’s hand on top of the table before turning to Alex. “Sorry, Alex, before we were so rudely interrupted by my gummy worm thief, I was going to tell you that my brother Kyle is two years younger than me and my sister Lexie is one year younger than me. The three of us are really close, like best friends. Kyle and I live in the same building, but Lexie moved back to California after college. She lives in Santa Monica now.”

“Lexie Benson is your sister?” Alex asked, wide eyed and completely in disbelief. “Lexie Benson, the YouTuber? I’ve seen every single one of the videos on her YouTube channel! She does these really funny videos where viewers can request what era or theme they want and she does these in-character spoofs about－” Alex started to blush. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m telling you all of this. She’s your sister so you know all about her channel and her videos. Wait, I think I’ve even seen you in some of them!”

“Yeah, she’ll force me every time I go out to Santa Monica,” Serena smiled at her. “And don’t apologize for getting excited over something. I’ll tell Lexie about you next time I talk to her.”

“Babe, your phone,” Jamie told her as she looked down at Serena’s phone and noticed an incoming video call.

“It’s my mom,” Serena groaned. “If I don’t answer, she’s going to keep calling.” She swiped across the screen to answer. “Hi, Mom. I’m out right now with Olivia, do you mind if I－”

“Where’s my grandbaby?” Mrs. Benson interrupted her. “I want to talk to her.”

Serena handed the phone to Olivia. “Hi, Grandma!” Olivia said excitedly. “Wanna see my girlfriend Alex? She’s having frozen yogurt with me. Me and her went on our first date tonight.”

“Hi, Mrs. Benson,” Alex said after scooting closer to Olivia. “Pleased to meet you.”

“You’re adorable!” Mrs. Benson responded. “And so well mannered. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Alex. So, tell me, how is my grandbaby on a date? Does she hold open the door and pull out your chair?”

“She’s a perfect gentleman and she’s so cute and sweet and she got me a rose and frozen yogurt tonight,” Alex beamed. “I like Olivia so much.”

Olivia felt butterflies in her stomach and she wanted nothing more than to kiss Alex if they were alone. “Doesn’t Alex look like a princess?” Olivia asked.

“She looks like Princess Grace,” Mrs. Benson told her granddaughter. “She could be a classic Hollywood starlet. And you look so handsome and grown up, my darling grandbaby.”

“Jamie cut my hair,” Olivia said excitedly.

“Jamie,” Mrs. Benson said in a teasing tone of voice, hoping Serena would hear. “Tall, dark, and handsome, herself, the one woman I would consider switching teams for.”

“Mom,” Serena groaned and Olivia couldn’t help but laugh when her mom put her head down on the table in embarrassment.

Olivia handed the phone over to Jamie. “Hi, Melanie. You’re looking beautiful as always. Where are you? I can see the sunset behind you. Are you on vacation?”

“Oh, no, I’m just on our rooftop,” Mrs. Benson said nonchalantly. “Didn’t my daughter tell you about the beach house in Malibu?”

Serena took the phone from Jamie. “I have to go now, Mom. Alex has to get home soon.”

“Not so fast,” Mrs. Benson told her. “Since you neglected to tell me when your spring break was, I looked it up on Columbia’s website and saw that it’s the week after next. I’m booking your flight to LAX. You can bring Jamie so I can finally meet her in person and my grandbaby can bring her little girlfriend and before you object and say you had something planned for my grandbaby, I will save you the effort and say nothing you can plan in that gloomy state you insist on living in is as much fun as the kids will have at the beach and at Disneyland.”

“Disneyland!” Alex said excitedly. “I’ll ask my mom if I can go as soon as I get home.”

Olivia’s dream of riding the teacups together and buying Alex a pair of sparkly Minnie Mouse ears could finally come true. “Please, Mom. Please can we go? I’ll do anything.”

“Don’t be the bad guy, Serena,” Mrs. Benson told her daughter. “I can hear how happy the kids are.”

“It’s 9:45 over here, Mom,” Serena said in a frustrated tone of voice. “I have to hang up now so we can take Alex home. Bye, Mom. I love you. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Serena set her phone on the table and then turned to face Jamie. “One thing I hate about smartphones is that you can’t angrily close them when you wanna hang up on someone. Nothing gave me more satisfaction as a teenager than hanging up on my mom with my pink bedazzled Motorola Razr phone whenever she nagged me about something like she is right now. She completely undermines my parenting every chance she gets. What if I had something planned for Ollie?”

“At least you knew how to use that phone because, apparently, you can’t use this one,” they heard Mrs. Benson say. “I’m still on the line, Serena. I’m booking your flight and I’m not taking no for an answer.”

Olivia looked across the table at her flustered mom and at Jamie who was trying to contain her laughter. The short interaction with her grandma had made all of her negative feelings go away. Tomorrow, she’d spend the afternoon with her dad and, as long as they could convince Mr. and Mrs. Cabot, she’d soon be at Disneyland with the love of her twelve-year-old life.

#cabenson #baby cabenson #alex and liv: the wonder years #serena benson #law and order svu

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river-bottom-nightmare · 3 years

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Here's the headcanon-ficlet-thing I promised! Actually, sorry, it's only HALF of my idea. This thing got MUCH longer than I intended and I've decided it would be easier to just chop this whole thing in two. If I ever send another headcanon, it'll either be much shorter than this or I just won't use anon. Anyways, the death of Dick's parents had just been so SUDDEN and I started thinking, "What if Dick had some separation anxiety when he was younger that just... Never really got resolved? His parents were gone, just like that, and Bruce literally risks his life every day. That couldn't have helped my made up conflict either, I imagine." Hope you enjoy! (1/13)

When Dick first arrived at the manor, he'd just been so GLOOMY. Even after Tony Zucco's arrest, he moped around the living spaces and never seemed happy with how spacious the manor's rooms were. A handful of times, Bruce and Alfred had caught him crying in the emptier wings by himself, but they had never really been sure what to do with the kid other than feel guilty. Sometimes (rarely), Dick would seek one of them out for a hug or SOME form of comfort, but it never seemed to be enough to truly make him feel better. It was no secret that Alfred and Bruce were not the most affectionate people in the world, and Dick had come from a very loving place. It was just another new thing to adjust to in his already new, unfamiliar life. Then Dick wanted to be Robin, full time, and neither Bruce nor Alfred could really say 'no.' Dick still wasn't happy- not for a while- but eventually, his mood started to improve. (2/13)

Maybe that was why no one initially found the boy's habit of waiting by the manor doors alarming. It was one of the places he visited more frequently, and Alfred originally assumed it was because he liked hanging on that specific entrance's chandelier more than the others. However, as the weeks passed, it became obvious that it was just a place Dick liked to hang out when he was waiting for Bruce to return from work or patrol. When it began nearing six thirty, the time Bruce's work hours ended, Dick would set up his homework or drawing paper on the floor and work just to the side of the doors as he waited for them to open. Sometimes he'd even hold a handstand or stretch for however long it took Bruce to come home that day. At first, Alfred didn't know what to make of it. But, watching the way Dick's face lit up every time Bruce knocked at the door, the old butler figured the small habit couldn't do any harm no matter how strange it was. He was just happy the boy wasn't still brooding. (3/13)

Bruce also noticed how Dick always seemed to be waiting for him after work, but ultimately didn't find anything concerning about the observation. Sure, it was a little strange to have such a large reminder that he was an actual guardian now, but he reasoned with himself that Dick would grow out of it after a certain point. He decided to just let the boy be and life carried on. Besides, he wasn't Dick's only person of support; Bruce had caught Dick watching Alfred work in the kitchen on a number of occasions with a concentrated look on his face. Without a doubt, the boy was finally starting to adapt to the manor's way of life. (In all honesty, Bruce had probably been too busy being relieved over the old butler's existence to judge whether or not any of his new ward's behaviors could be considered alarming.) (4/13)

As Dick grew more and more relaxed overtime, neither Bruce nor Alfred put much thought into his other developing habits. For instance, as Robin, Dick always made sure to check in with a quick "Are you still there, Batman?" over the comms everytime the line went quiet for more than ten minutes. Bruce would occasionally warn him not to call in when they were on stealth missions, but Dick never quite seemed comfortable with leaving the line COMPLETELY dead whenever they left each other's sight. On those missions, he'd sometimes blow softly into his comm unit, and Bruce would have to make some subtle noise back so as not to completely worry the kid. Dick even seemed to develop certain behaviors around charity events and galas; for example, he would always hug Bruce's pant leg at the beginning of the events and would only let go once he was made to socialize. Despite the fact that it soon became apparent the kid was far from shy, the habit always took place without fail, to Bruce's perplexed amusement. Maybe the kid just hated Gotham's elites? (5/13)

More and more little habits flew under the radar as everyone still seemed to be adjusting to the new lifestyle. Occasionally Bruce and Alfred would pick up on something seeming a little off, but at the same time, Dick finally looked happy. Really, a few weird displays of affection here and there were FAR from their concern so long as Dick's days of endless distraught were over. And so, once Dick finally- and TRULY- settled into the manor as his new home, a bunch of odd behaviors just seemed to be swept under the carpet and ignored. On the unavoidable nights where Bruce got injured in the field, there was no missing how the habits seemed to rise in intensity, but by then... They became the everyday normal and were never addressed. (6/13)

(The Justice League found Robin's behavior more bemusing than anything. Dick was still in the habit of obsessively checking the comms when Batman, on a rare occasion, asked for backup. "Check in, Batman?" "Still scaling the perimeter. We might not catch any activity tonight past a few petty thefts." "Alrighty. And, uh, Superman! Status update!" "Nothing going on up here either, Robin." "Okay!" Ten minutes passed and the boy's voice crackled back to life on the comms once more. "Is everyone still okay?" After that one particular patrol, Clark had sent Bruce a questioning look. "He's nine. Of course he's worried." Clark didn't push it- or anyone else for that matter.) (7/13)

It wasn't until Dick turned sixteen and started looking to be more independent that his behavior finally set off a few alarm bells. His check-ins had turned more snippy over the years when Bruce and him got into fights, but they never really stopped. The arms clinging to Bruce's pant legs at galas were instead replaced by a friendly hand on Bruce's shoulder, yet Dick's presence had never really left his side- only growing more flighty and uncertain as he got older. When Dick did his homework, by then in his last year or two of highschool, it was no longer on the floor but instead in the dining room closest to the manor's entrance- still started at around five or six just like when Dick first arrived at the manor, and still fit to Bruce's work schedule. It occurred to Alfred that a few of Dick's behaviorisms probably should have been checked out a while ago. (8/13)

"When you were Master Richard's age, you were barely home. It's normal for teenagers to want a bit of distance and alone time, but Master Bruce, he only stays after school for club activities. The rest of his time is either spent partoling around the city or helping YOU. I'm worried whether or not his behavior is healthy." Bruce had contimplated these words before giving his own thoughts. At the time, he and Dick's working relationship as Batman and Robin was becoming a bit more strained, but he still KNEW Dick. "I'm not sure, Alfred. He says he's happy with the friends he has, and he's always been relatively well behaved... Could it be that this is just routine for him?" Alfred disagreed and so the discussion continued. However, any plans they made to adress the situation were cut short when Dick got shot in the shoulder. (9/13)

Bruce tried not to feel guilty about firing Dick and then kicking him out of the manor. A little space would be good for the boy, right? For as long he could remember, Dick had always been just around the corner. It was safer this way. He ignored Alfred's angry, dissapointed gaze and Clark's furious demands to explain what the hell he'd been thinking. Batman didn't need a Robin, and Dick would be fine without Bruce. (Bruce would be fine without Dick.) Later, on patrol, there was a second where the comm crackled to life. Before anything could happen it got shut off again, and before Bruce knew it, Dick's check-ins were gone. Batman didn't need Robin. (10/13)

There was no missing Dick's sudden change. With the Titans, Dick's mother henning got turned up to an eleven. Dick was always somewhere in the tower helping someone, and no one could miss the way he was practicaly always asking if anyone needed anything. Missions and patrols ran mostly the same, but it was much more often that Dick could be found staying up late at night, going through evidence on cases he was working on. His friends did their best to be understanding, but there was no hiding the fact that Dick needed help. Real help. They urged him to talk about what was wrong, but even Dick seemed to be at a loss for what he was going through. "I mean, I got kicked out! What else is there to say?" He yelled one day. Roy tried to reason with him. "But there's MORE to it than-" "There isn't." "Dick, you've been acting off for months." "And I'll be FINE in a few more! I'm always fine. Stop worrying." (11/13)

Eventually, they did. After a few more missions, it was as if nothing ever happened. Dick worked as he normally would and he started running off to do his own things rather than hover around other people's projects. He still gave off a sense of brokeness but by then there wasn't much that anyone could do. There had been one week in particular, though, that things just seemed to... Shift. Dick had just discovered that Bruce adopted another kid in the newspapers and there were sightings of another Robin. For a second, he seemed furious, and they all remembered feeling VERY concerned for what the guy might do. For four days straight it was if he was too angry to talk. On the fifth day, Dick disappeared. He wasn't seen again until the next morning. "Dick, are you alright?" Something visibly settled in him and just like that, Dick was fine again. Still overbearing, but fine. (12/13)

Okay! That's all I have so far since I don't want to spam your inbox with any more text blocks for one idea. You probably noticed that this first part just goes over more HOW Dick behaved when he was younger. The second part to this will focus more on everyone realizing that Dick had some repressed trauma going on, and the consequences it's had on him for never adressing said trauma. (Also Bruce, you shouldn't have kicked your teenage son out of the house. That didn't help.) Some of Dick's coping mechanisms when it comes to dealing with Bruce will probably also be questioned, but with the time away from Bruce, don't worry- Dick will be more obviously independent. He knew he wasn't in the best place. I'll send you the second part whenever I get done with it, which shouldn't take too long. Thanks for being excited to read my head canon and ideas! (13/13)

hey babe. this is,,,,,,oh my god. i love it so much. well actually i hated it because it was full of angst and it made me feel emotions and AGH. but also i loved it and god i can’t wait for the next part. you have NO IDEA how much i need the next part.

also, can i just say? the fic portion itself (2-12) is 1.7k words long. with a little editing, this could be a full fledged fic you can post on ao3. you absolutely don’t have to do it if you don’t want to, that’s just an idea i’m throwing out there.

dick with separation anxiety sounds so so plausible, because that abrupt shift from living in a circus to wayne manor of all places must have been QUITE the shift. i really loved how you touched on all these different habits and quirks dick had growing up, and how those bled over into different relationships in his life. and i can’t wait to see how you resolve it.

and i have one more thing for you. this isn’t really the same idea but it’s got somewhat similar elements: i read a fic a while back about dick being touch starved. it seemed up your alley, and anyone else who liked reading this incredible drabble, i think you’ll enjoy reading it! touch starved by envysparkler.

#dick grayson #nightwing #dc #dick grayson headcanon #nightwing headcanon #dc headcanon #dick grayson fic #nightwing fic #dc fic

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omgdexnursey · 3 years

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hey again its crisis anon and i'm starting to rly want to try my hand at writing fanfic!! embracing the "fuck it" mentality atm🤪🤙 & i think i have the language aspect of writing down, like i'm good enough at it lol, but i've never written for a fandom before so its kind of daunting :( if its not an inconvenience i'd love to know if u have any tips!!

sorry on the lateness of this reply!! i’ve been thinking about this ask pretty much since i got it.

(this got kinda long oops i hope this is useful)

first and foremost, i would say that when deciding to write fic: write the stories you want to read. that is absolutely essential to fic writing because if you aren’t inspired by a story or it’s not something you’re all that interested in, chances are it’s either a) not gonna be all that great because you weren’t invested in it or b) it’s not gonna get finished because you’ll get bored of it. also, while i do write because i love the community aspect of it and i love people commenting and sharing my stories and talking about them, the core of my writing stems from me wanting to write and getting excited about a story i think is really cool. sometimes i think: am i really going to write this stupid au that no one else cares about and the answer is usually yes because I want to write it and therefore to me, it’s a story worth telling. this also applies if you’re writing a story you feel has already been done a million times - even if it has, it’s never been told by you

second: be patient with yourself. if you’ve been following me for a while, you probably know that my tag for posts about writing and its struggles is “writing is hard” and it is! sometimes i start stories, get only a little bit of the way into it and then think of a new story and start writing that instead. it’s totally okay (and not unusual) to bounce around in fics, especially if you’re stuck, because otherwise it’ll start feeling less like a fun hobby and more like a chore to finish. i have fics i started over a year ago, or haven’t worked on in months because i got stuck, and a lot of times i find that after working on something else or just giving my mind time away from it, i’ll think of a scene that i want to add or how to get around where i’m stuck. sometimes i open up a doc that’s been there for months, write one sentence i thought of, and then leave it again.

(as an add-on: writing is not linear! sometimes i know how i want a fic to end or start or just one event that happens somewhere in the middle and nothing else, and i start by writing the parts that inspired me to write it, then build around it.)

writing is also very fluid. by that i mean there’s so many times i’ve gone into a fic with an idea that is the core of the fic only to get partially or completely through writing it and realize that i want to change it in some way or go in a different direction than when i first started, so don’t be afraid to reshape an idea you originally had.

on a practical level, if you have an idea, write it down somewhere. there have been so many times that i’ll just randomly have an idea pop into my head and i’m like trying to fall asleep or i’m doing something else and i foolishly tell myself that i’ll remember it later so i don’t need to write it down now. (you might be able to guess - i do not remember a lot of them) i have notes on my phone that have just like lines of dialogues or the outline of a scene and some of them don’t really mean anything from the outside (ex. from a note about an artist au i have in progress: “dex wakes up and nursey’s painting - it’s really late”) just something for you to read and remember what you wanted from it.

also, don’t completely delete scenes if you want to take them out of a fic. i have a document titled “random unused ideas” and part of it is just scraps of ideas referenced in the above paragraph, and some of it is scenes i’ve taken out of fics but don’t want to get rid of because they might come in handy in other fics. i just recently decided to take a bunch of the snippets of scenes i had and put them into one fic to be worked on in the future. i also like to make an adjacent doc to put scenes in just in case i want them back in the fic i was writing. so for example, when i was writing “under the summer sun with you” i had a doc titled “fishing trip au extras”, and there was an entire scene i ended up taking out but i had in that doc because i wasn’t sure yet if it was going to make the final cut. (now it’s in my general “random unused ideas”)

finally, if you can, find people to talk to about writing. i get so excited when people want to talk about my stories and my friends here bounce ideas back and forth, which has helped me work around some of the roadblocks i’ve encountered.

hope this helps and if you do write good luck!!! my inbox + messages are always open and i love talking about writing!! it’s scary and challenging but if you find that you enjoy it, that’s really what matters!

#answered #crisis anon #i have a little bit of time so i figured i'd answer this one #thank you for this ask!!#it was nice to think about because about two years ago i was v intimidated by the idea of writing fic for omgcp #but i wanted to more than i was afraid to and i also asked someone for advice and it helped me #and it also made me think about why and how i write #writing is hard

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fitmydaydream · 6 years

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Vulnerable - Part 1

Part 1 / Part 2

Prompt: It was one fine day until Y/N accidentally hears Shawn mention her name in a conversation that she wasn’t supposed to hear.

Word Count: 3k

A/N: ANGST ANGST ANGST! This imagine is based on some prompts an anon sent me and I got deep into that concept so I decided to write a whole story about it. Thank you @anon. I hope you guys like it. Happy reading angels!

You knew this day was going to end on a great note or you atleast hoped it would. You'd enjoyed yourself today quite well and have had some sweet conversations with Shawn's family members and his friends and they all happened to like you quite better than you expected which meant you didn't have to loathe yourself at the end of the day.

The sun was almost ready to set down and it was time to bid goodbye to all.

You thanked Shawn's parents to invite you for such a great get together and let them know that you probably had one of the best brunches today.

Shawn's parents were really fond of you. They said that you were the girlfriend that he never had and had been always so welcoming towards you with open arms. Unlike anyone else, they were the only ones who knew about you and Shawn being in a relationship.

You hugged them and shortly after having a quick conversation with them, your eyes began to scan the crowd for Shawn. He was nowhere to be seen. So you decided to approach Aaliyah about his whereabouts right now.

"Hey Aaliyah have you seen Shawn? I think it's time for us to leave now and I cannot find him anywhere." you asked her.

"Oh yeah. I saw him in the backyard just a few moments ago. You can check him there if you want!" Aaliyah replied.

You thanked her and walked towards the backyard in order to get Shawn. Slowly, as you approached the backyard you started to hear whispers. You got confused from the fact as why Shawn has to whisper in his own house. You smiled to yourself as how silly he can be sometimes.

But as you got to the door that lead to the backyard. You stopped in your tracks. You didn't want to go further. You didn't want to eavesdrop but couldn't help when there was a mention about your name. You carefully hid yourself behind the door and tried listening to the ongoing conversation between Shawn and whom you assumed to be a bunch of other people, most probably his cousins.

"Like I can't even tell you man what's it all like. She's always wants to know where I am and what I'm doing like she's not my mother you know. Even mum doesn't do that anymore ahh!" Shawn whispered to the others. You still weren't able to make out what this was exactly about.

"Like she wants to know everything I do. Every place I go, I should go after informing her otherwise she would throw a fit. Constantly nagging and craving for attention." Shawn said. Your face fell at those words.

"Always so clingy man! I don't know what to do."

"Why don't you tell her? Maybe she'll get what you're trying to say? She's your girlfriend after all buddy." someone amongst the group spoke.

"Hell nah. I don't think that's a good idea because who knows what fit she'll throw next after hearing that." Shawn said slightly laughing.

Hurt and embarrassed would be the most appropriate words to describe what you were feeling right then.

Yes you were clingy but only because you weren't allowed to be with Shawn when you both were under the prying eyes. And for the fact, Shawn was always under the prying eyes and the camera flashes. Nobody except his parents was allowed to know about you two.

It has been 1 whole year into your relationship with Shawn and there he was still all secretive about his relationship with you to the public and most importantly, his friends.

The first 6-7 months you didn't care about this fact at all because you were trying to adjust to his lifestyle then. But it was after those 7 months when Shawn finally claimed the love he held for you that you started to feel a bit insecure about yourself but you brushed the feeling off for the sake that one day maybe he'll make it official to all his friends and his fans. But that hadn't happened till date.

You never complained about the feeling of sheer lonliness in such a big house. The homesickness you felt sometimes just for the sake that Shawn might be needing you instead and you didn't want to be a burden on him. You never compained about Shawn's lack of presence in his own house.

You never complained about the moments when he would avoid you in front of his friends and certain parties giving the lame excuse that he didn't want people to know about you both. He would exist like you weren't even there. You never complained about not holding his hand in public out of love just because the paparazzi could catch you and flash them as headlines on the front page. You never came between him and his music because you respected his passion so much.

And now he had the audacity to go and call you clingy and that too in front of his family members. You thought to yourself that this couldn't get any worse. A tear slipped from your eye and you quickly wiped it with your hand. You were heartbroken.

You started walking away thinking that you were gonna think about this once you get home and that this was not an appropriate place to confront Shawn about this.

You were too upset so you decided to slip through the backdoor and texted Shawn you were waiting by the car. You stood there by the car thinking about ways to confront him about this. Or were you actually really that clingy?

After about you saw Shawn walk out through the door of his house, waving goodbye to his parents and Aaliyah. He walked upto you smiling as if he'd just not told his fellows about his girlfriend being clingy.

Usually you would wait for Shawn to open the door for you but you were too pissed to let him do that so you climbed in the passenger seat and closed the door. Shawn got confused but somehow decided to let it go.

He sat himself in the driver seat and looked at you. You were looking outside the window trying your best to avoid him.

"Did you have a good time today babe?" Shawn asked you gently reaching for your hand.

"Yeah." you replied bluntly, quick to withdraw your hand from his.

"Baby are you okay? I mean is everything okay?" Shawn asked you concerning.

"Yeah. Can we please just go home. I'm too sleepy." you replied him quickly shifting your eyes away in the other direction.

Shawn wasn't convinced with your reply but decided to ask you again about this once you both got home.

The ride to home was short but an awkward one. Shawn tried to initiate several conversations between you two but they were shortly ended by you just humming or nodding in reply to whatever he was telling you. Shawn got an idea from that there was surely something up with you .

Once Shawn parked the car in your driveway, you opened the door and rushed towards yours and Shawn's so called home in order to go to your bedroom. The whole ride you've been thinking about the words that came out of his mouth and was trying so hard not to cry. It was getting too much for you now.

Shawn saw you rushing towards the house and was quick to follow you.

“Y/N! Why are you walking so fast? Y/N! Slow down!" Shawn yelled after you.

All his calls went unheard by you. You were like a bubble that was going to burst anytime now and you didn't want to talk to him right now and make it worse. But there was no escaping from him right now.

Suddenly you felt a strong grip around your right hand and Shawn turned you around to face him.

“What the hell Y/N? What is wrong with you?” Shawn asked you clearly pissed off.

You rolled your eyes at him out of annoyance. Annoyed by the fact that how cool and innocent he was acting as he just didn't do anything. You were so pissed off at him that even when he turned you around to face you, you didn't care to look at his face at all.

"What's with me?" you asked him plainly while looking at the wall behind him.

"Duh?? What's with you being all sappy all of a sudden? I think the lunch went quite well and you enjoyed it too. So what's wrong with you?" he asked you, his grip getting more firm around your arms. You took a deep breath and let it out. But it didn't help with the anger.

"Why don't you tell me that Shawn? Everything is so perfect and easy for you that you also assume other's to be like that right?" you hissed while pushing his hands off from you.

"What? What's wrong with me?" Shawn asked you completely unaware of what you were trying to say.

"Oh well nice. What a pretty drama queen you are. Play it all innocent and I'll let it go and run into your arms just like all those previous times. But not this time Shawn!" you spat.

Shawn began to get nervous. He didn't want to believe that you'd just heard the conversation he was having with his cousins. This could turn pretty bad he thought to himself. But he still tried to play it innocent and act cool.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"Don't play it cool because I know what you said about me Shawn. It's too late to back out!" you said raising your voice a little.

"You fucking eavesdropped? Are you crazy how can you do that Y/N?" Shawn said with a raised voice.

"How pathetic of you that you care about that but don't fucking care about what you said about me in front of your cousins? I seriously wanna applaud you for that." you said laughing sarcastically.

"Well I don't think I said anything wrong. Did I?" Shawn said bluntly.

“Wh-What? Oh my god I can't believe you Shawn. How could you fucking say that Shawn. If you'd a problem with me, you fucking talk to me Shawn and not to your cousins about it while mocking about it!” you raised your voice a little more this time. You were shocked and it was getting hard for you to not to cry.

"Well what could I've said to you Y/N? You're so bloody uptight about all the things always that I can't even talk to you." Shawn retaliated.

"Oh that's so great to hear that I'm the one who's being uptight here. Even if I'm uptight according to you, the reason behind it is you Shawn. It you. " you huffed.

"Oh now you're gonna turn this all on me? Well that's great because I don't have time for this shit Y/N!" he said with a voice much higher this time.

"Yes because this is indeed all about you. You don't have time for this shit Shawn or you don't have time for me? I think that's what you're trying to say right? Because you don't have fucking time for me any time Shawn. And that's the truth!" you yelled at him.

"This is so not true and don't you dare go there!" he hissed.

"Oh no! I'm absolutely gonna go there because you need to know what has been going on my mind lately. I'm in no way going to let you be anymore ignorant about this." you stopped yourself from breaking down.

He continued looking the other way and rolling his eyes which hurt you more that it had.

"Then listen Shawn. I don't recognise you anymore. You're not the same person who I fell in love with an year back. You're not that person who was proud to have me and didn't held back himself from showering me with affection an year back. You're a changed person Shawn. I didn't fall in love with this cold hearted person who's not even looking at me right now even when I'm about to break down. What happened to you? What happened to those times when you rush towards me with wide open arms to console me and telling me it's gonna be alright." you finally cried.

Shawn's face softened a bit after hearing your last words.

"What happened to those times when you would wake me up with a good breakfast on our bed and surprise me with a date anyday Shawn? But now you don't even consider having dinner with me atleast once a week. I let myself doze off to sleep when I get tired of waiting for you even when you know how much I hate sleeping alone Shawn. This home doesn't feel like home Shawn. It doesn't feel like the one we moved in so happily and with all those sweet promises we made to each other. I'm so tired. And most importantly, I don't even think you like me to be your side anymore?" your voice croaked at the end of the sentence.

Shawn's face suddenly turned to look at you with a hurt expression laced over his face.

"W-what do you mean Y/N?" he asked.

"It's pretty clear isn't it Shawn. How you don't want to be seen in the public with me? At first I understood it was important for your career to stay away from all the paparazzi and all the drama that would follow up with it but Shawn you fucking confessed you loved me! Didn't you? I believed you when you said I make you feel grounded. That you don't feel afraid with me. That you wanna be with me all the time. Were they all lies Shawn? When you're refused to go out with me in public, you agree just like that but how come you've no problem getting clicked with other girls?" you sobbed.

Shawn held his head down, looking at his feet. Probably ashamed?

"You've no idea what it feels like Shawn when I'm sitting on this couch for most times of the day and see pictures of you with other girls and people speculating about you being in relationship with them even though that's not true. Fuck people, even your friends or even the closest of your friends are fucking clueless about us being in a relationship Shawn because you don't like PDA in front of them. You act like I don't freaking exist Shawn. And even after all this, I decide to stick with you. Stick with you despite all the lonliness, insecurities and anxiety your fame life gives me because for me it was always and always you Shawn. It was always you and your music. It has always been all about you and your passion Shawn. I feel like there was and will never be a place for me in your professional life because I want to always see you rising. I don't want to hold you back. Hell I never held you back even when you were so selfish. You're so egotistical Shawn that all you care about is yourself. And despite all this you've the fucking audacity to go and call me clingy and uptight? I this what I get at last?" you were crying but you were in rage too. You were so angry with Shawn and his casual attitude.

Shawn stayed quite. He was numb. Didn't know what to say because every word that was coming out of your mouth was reflecting the truth and your pain.

"Are you ashamed to have me Shawn? Ashamed that I'm not as perfect like the celebrity friends you have? Ashamed that I might not be good enough to bring out in public and claim that you love me? Answer me Shawn! Just bloody answer me!!!" you yelled.

"W-What? Why would you s-say t-that?" he stuttered.

"That's not even an answer you idiot! Fuck that. Answer me this. Do you even love me anymore Shawn?" you said with pain visible in your words and eyes. Your eyes were begging him for the answer. You regretted asking him this but it was important to ask because maybe you were the one who was at fault here by having false hopes from him that Shawn was still in love with you.

Shawn looked at you with wide eyes. He seemed like his soul has left his body. He was breathing heavily. He seemed so out of words. You knew what it was. He was not in love with you. Not anymore. And you've got the answer from his silence. Your heart shattered into pieces and you felt sick to your stomach. You were losing your mind. A tear slipped from your eye. You were more angry with him than upset.

"You're a fucking coward Shawn Peter Raul Mendes. A fucking coward is what you are. I let all my walls down for you and this is what you treat me with. The pathetic silence." you spoke to him through gritted teeth and pointing your finger at his chest. Tears now streaming down your face.

“I hate you for making me feel so miserable.” you spat while pushing him away on his chest hard.

You couldn't stand him anymore. You needed to get out of this house right now. It was feeling like the world was closing upon you. Your vision blurred and turned and started walking away from him towards the door.

Shawn looked like if he had just seen a ghost.

"And don't you fucking dare to even follow me Shawn. Don't you fucking dare." you said while walking out of the door.

Tears welled up in his eyes. He loved you. More than anything else. He just didn't think if he was right for you at all. He didn't deserve you ever.

Shawn was sobbing hard looking at you walking away from him. Maybe he was used to walking away from you and make you suffer always but instead it was his turn today. Oh god what has he done.

Feedback is always welcomed and appreciated♥️. Don't forget to hit REBLOG if you like it! Also, do you guys think I should make a part 2? MASTERLIST

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes post #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes imagines #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes text #imagines #shawn mendes one shot #shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes angst #my writing

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