#I can’t live through another show disappointing me with romance

[ambeauty]

Resisting the urge to be like put all your expectations aside 😭

#jaded #expectations killed my spirit #and that was for a canon ship #I can’t have any expectations for a will they won’t they #that half the ppl think we’re delusional and the other half are all in on #I can’t live through another show disappointing me with romance #iykyk #your show will get cancelled #your show will be short lived #your lead actress will get the short end of the stick of the storyline #showrunners will sabotage shit just so fans won’t know what to expect #got I’m looking at you #it’s really the wild wild west #and my heart is way too sensitive to start wishing and hoping again #shipping

[deancaspinefest]

Books, Pies, and Roommates

Author: seidenapfel | Artist: Kit Shay

Posting on Sunday March 17

Everything seemed so easy when Castiel landed a job in Lawrence as a literature professor at Kansas University. He even found a place to stay with his cousin in Topeka, less than thirty miles away. But the daily commute quickly gets on his nerves and he begins looking for a little room in town. When he finally lucks out on a house, it comes with a catch. His mysterious landlord/housemate works and lives in Topeka during the week, and will only be in Lawrence for the weekend while Castiel is back at his cousin’s to honor a promise he made. When Dean walks into his favorite pie shop, the new sales assistant takes his breath away. Steve is gorgeous, and part of the owner’s family. Dean doesn’t even mind that Steve picks up Gabriel’s stupid moniker for him. After all, Deano has one syllable more, and Dean will do anything to hear Steve’s voice just a little bit longer. Though, as breathtaking Steve might be, he isn't Angel. If only Dean's book-loving best friend for over a decade weren't a mystery in himself — a guy who Dean has only met online, but who has slowly taken his heart away. And it seems that Dean isn't alone in his feelings. When the lines blur and fantasies merge three guys into one, disappointment and heartbreak seem to be inevitable.

Keep reading for a sneak preview!

“Dude! You did what?”

“I found you a new roommate,” Sam explained and Dean knew his brother was rolling his eyes. “As you asked me to.”

“Yeah, I heard you,” Dean muttered. “And well, I did, but duh? Did you take the first one that came along?

The silence at the other end of the line was enough of an answer.

“Seriously? The first one? You pick the first Tom, Dick, and Harry that walks into my home?” Dean couldn’t believe it. “You didn’t even—”

“His name is Castiel. And he’s nice,” Sam cut in, defending himself.

Nice?

Before Dean could interrupt him, Sam continued, “So, get this, Castiel is actually in the same predicament as you are. He lives in Topeka, but teaches at KU and he’s already fed up with his daily commute to campus.”

“Castiel? What a mouthful of a name is that?” Dean grumbled.

“As far as I know it’s the name of an angel,” his brother answered calmly, taking none of Dean’s shit.

“Angel?” Dean huffed while another Angel came to his mind. Shaking his head to clear the thought away, he went on, “You telling me the guy is some religious weirdo?”

Sam laughed and Dean could literally hear another eye roll. “Don’t worry. I don’t think that should be a problem. Quite the contrary. He seemed very interested in our library. Or, more precisely, /your/ part of the library.”

Dean huffed. “That’s most of it anyway, dude.”

Groaning, Sam ignored him and went on. “I don’t think he realized how obvious he was when he skimmed through the titles of your collection of gay pulp.”

“Hey, it ain’t gay pulp, not all of it,” Dean protested.

“Pulp, romance, literature — whatever. You can’t deny it’s kinda gay.”

Dean laughed before teasing, “Just kinda?” Even though his brother couldn’t see him, he wiggled his brows.

“How would I know? I haven’t even touched half of it,” Sam backpedaled and Dean laughed even louder. “Somehow I need to keep my sanity,” his brother shot back. Then it hit Dean. “Wait, you showed this guy, this—”

“Castiel,” Sam offered helpfully.

“Whatever,” Dean snapped. “You showed him the library?”

“Dean, he lives there now. Of course, I showed him around. Besides, how do you think I should have hidden the shelves in the living room? You’re not very subtle with your interests.”

Subtle? Dammit, it was his home, for fuck’s sake. “Still, the library? And you let him stay? Alone at home?”

“Yes, because that’s what happens when you rent your house, dude.” Dean could see his brother’s bitchface in his mind. “Do I need to remind you that you were the one who asked me to take care of the viewings?”

“Goddammit, Sammy,” Dean grouched. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath before giving in, “Yeah. Sorry. I did. But that didn’t mean that you decide who lives with me.”

“I don’t know. He just seemed… perfect.”

(continue reading on Ao3 on Sunday March 17)

#destiel #deancas #destiel fic #deancas fic #destiel art #deancas art #pinefest 2024 #pinefest previews #2024 Dean/Cas Pinefest #author: seidenapfel #artist: Kit Shay #Two Person Love Triangle #Roommates #Idiots in Love

[hermannish]

the saltburn review

saltburn hit pretty close to home. largely because i lived it. at times it was personal and surreal, shocking and true. but in the end it was just another misguided attempt at understanding the misunderstood.

and whom are the misunderstood? the middle class and the one percent? or the soul searching queer? according to emerald fennell, it’s the latter.

for the most part i felt that oliver was created and portrayed accurately, though i was ultimately disappointed by his character arc. while the idea of him m*dering Felix and his family is darkly humorous and seems like an appropriate conclusion, i think it actually misrepresented his character entirely. simultaneously, it absolutely destroyed any sense of romanticism the film spent close to three acts persuading the audience on. instead of the psycho-erotic masterpiece you think just might serve as the male counterpart for killing eve, you get just another fuck you to the LGBTQ community and the one-percent economy. which i might add is grotesquely overdone in media, and the audience knows it by the time they reach the film’s stale ending.

and it is stale. every scene plays like a fever dream of conversations one has already heard before. with the most cliché monologues coming from Farleigh and Venetia. every word seems so painstakingly familiar one can’t help but draw the similarities to F. Scott’s Jay Gatsby. Though where Fitzgerald cuts his dreamy romance and imagination short before any nightmare can begin, Fennell embraces the demons of the night, dragging her Gatsby through the mud and the blood until he’s so unrecognizable she has to provide an alternate origin story to make up for Oliver’s unnatural behavior.

and it is unnatural. so unnatrual that by the credit roll, you’re not quite sure who Oliver is, or what his motives are. on the pretense of reality, it seems pretty rigid for a guy who grew up in a decent neighborhood to go from erotically obsessed with his classmate to a murderous usurper. a conclusion so categorically absurd, it’s impossible to believe- largely because anyone on Oliver’s spectrum would never be able to sustain the public image it takes to uphold Saltburn let alone the ghost of Felix. His nude dance around the estate might as well be his seven seconds of heaven before the vultures descend at Farleigh’s call. And who would Farleigh find? Venetia claims her family believes Oliver to be a spider while she herself is partial to the idea that he’s a moth. [though ultimately she decides he’s a freaky nobody.] i personally concluded he was a werewolf. Normal when the prodigal *son is out, but absolutely possessed at night. Oliver himself professes that he is in fact a vampire. but much to every viewers dismay, we’re not entirely sure why.

3/5 stars: guess it’s just an oliver Quick Horror movie for the rich and famous.

bonus:

which saltburn plague are you?

let me know in the comments

the vampire: dead. cold hearted. bloodsucking. manipulative. stealing the life out of everyone and everything after they invite you in. guaranteed to love you forever or your money back.

the spider: the silent observer, hiding in corners, working in the shadows, whispering half-truths to make your bed of lies. and once you’ve captured your lovely guest, up up and away they go. down your throat for dinner.

the moth: addicted to the light, and the money, and the scene, and the shiny diamond irresistible things. you do nothing but eat holes into everything and everyone until the light is yours alone.

the freaky nobody: you have an erotic obsession with the guy you met in chem class, or the 60 year old lead actress on an emmy award winning tv show. you spend your days, weeks, months admiring from afar and planning how you’ll end up being together. you like to spy on them while they masturbate and after they’re dead you wear their aromas and old underwear.

the werewolf: an absolute darling pet during the day. someone's best friend and best mate. you wait by their side and do everything they ask in complete and utter obedience and loyalty. but as soon as the full moon comes out you can't be trusted. the demon inside comes out, no one is safe, and everything is considered dinner.

would you / did you / never ever

let me know in the comments

1. lend your bike to your secret crush

I WOULD ABSOLUTELY. wouldn’t go so far as pre-sabotaging the bicycle, but if she needed a ride, i’d give her mine.

2. watch your crush sleep with another person

never ever. i don’t think i could. it’s one of those things that i think i never would want to see. I think i would black out. I think I would get jealous in a way that i’ve never been jealous before. and i think it would haunt me in a way that nothing’s ever haunted me before. i can’t see it being healthy.

3. make out with your crushes love interest

there’s a duplicity to this. maybe even a triplicity given the nature of the game. would I? yes. if the circumstances were right. have i? I have - sort of. not really. there was a guy that i knew who had worked with her previously. and they weren’t romantically linked at all. but i remember thinking when we made out, this guy has been near her. they've touched. because of my circumstances, it felt mystical and urgent, but i never allowed it to happen again. mainly because deep down i knew i was using him. and all i would ever do was use him for precisely that reason. and that wasn’t fair. so i never talked to him again. never ever? she’s married. her husband is this guy. i don’t think i could kiss him. i don’t think i would. but if i did i would imagine it being for the sole reason of missing her because she was no longer with us.

4. tell your crush you suffered a traumatic event to get them to befriend you even more

no. not to the extent that Ollie lied. that was pretty big even for me. i’d tell a white lie. I have told a white lie to get my crush to befriend me even more, but to lie about trauma is diabolical. [the lie i told, was about not having a twitter account in my crushes honorum. in truth, i really did. and i didn’t want her to know about it because it was my place to be transparent. and curious, and sexually fluid. it was my place to be absolutely mental. but i never lied about traumas. [that’s gnarly.]

5. spend the night over your super rich friend’s house

never ever. for precisely the reasons detailed in this film, however parody the script may have been, there’s a lot of truth to the scenario. to the reactions. I always did my best to avoid putting myself into those situations. when you’re in social settings like that i think it’s important to realize and establish your role early on. if they’re fire, you’ve got to position yourself as water, or earth, or wind and be realistic about that. if you’re not, you’re just setting yourself up for failure. you just seem delusional. you've got to be strong. be your own character. set your boundaries and don’t apologize for them. if you don't you''ll only ever be a play thing. you want to make an impression? you want to be memorable? my advice is to keep networking. don't limit yourself to one person just because they're so and so and they have connections. keep networking. make your own connections. and make connections that are outside of their circle. that way if things do go south, the most you lose is an understanding, but never your newly earned position. when you limit yourself you become dependent on others for your happiness and growth. you don't just come off as a moth, but a leech. [that's your que pamela!] it's just not attractive.

6. slurp your crushes masturbation bathwater

abso-fucking-lutely - on second thought it might be a bit too soapy for my tasting. but i’d definitely do a finger dip.

7. perform oral sex during someone’s menstrual cycle

like a full session? probably not. some people try and justify it and make it acceptable but the fact is it’s unsanitary, unhealthy, and unclean. there’s even risk of giving your partner a bacterial infection. so no. not exactly. but i know it’s possible for some women to become aroused. i’d be open to fingering long term, but nothing oral. i have nothing to prove in doing that.

8. play psychological mind games with your competition

i did. don’t recommend it at all. it’s enough to make a person go insane. and there are so many other wonderful things you could be doing. like being kind and being genuine. that’s not to say that being that way will inherently make you exempt from offensive behaviors- and by offensive behaviors i am referring to the unmentionable hazing experience wealthy young adults play on middle class young adults. that's the ugly side of ambition. the part that you’re unprepared for because no one really expects it. you're so focused on socially advancing that once you've gotten your foot in the door the only thing you can process is the success of it. the next steps of it. it's a lot. one minute you think you've just secured generational wealth for your family and the next you're standing in an arena with a sword while all the advanced gather for entertainment. it can just be impossible and manipulative, and jealous for no reason. they’ll hurt you just because they can, just because they’re not having a good day. and it can cost you everything. so don't go in it with the expectation you're going to win. the game is rigged. go in with the intention to survive. you never know, you might get lucky.

9. kill your crush after they found out about your deception and decided they no longer wanted to be in a relationship with you

nooooo!!!! never ever! if anything, i’d kill myself before i had the nerve to kill my crush. to ruin those eyes? and that hair? and those legs? and that ass? and those lips?! PLEASE. the last thing i’d want to do is kill someone i’m in love with! it's just unfathomable. i can't even imagine it. life just wouldn't have meaning without my crush. even if she is married. i don't care. i still want her alive and breathing. if anything i want her to live forever.

10. masturbate on your crushes grave.

this one made me laugh. in hindsight no. maybe you know, i’d think about us being together when i go to lay some flowers, but full on, naked and thrashing against the dirt? i can’t say that’s for me. I can’t speak for what happens in the car though- especially if the grave just happens to be by the beach...

#saltburn #gatsby #killing eve #love:andie #parasite #barry keoghan #jacob elordi #jacob elrodis bath water #rosamund pike #felix catton #oliver quick #psych:andie

[lurkingshan]

Step by Step Episode 11 (OF DOOM)

Warning: I really, really did not like this episode. If you’re trying to keep positive vibes you should scroll on by, friends! 

Welp. I told a few friends last week that my biggest disappointment would be if, after missing the mark on the emotional payoff of the slow burn and speed running the relationship, the show chose to break them up and do a time jump rather than staying with them in the present time and working through the conflicts they set up. And here we are! I wish I’d been wrong about where this was heading. Shouts to @waitmyturtles and @neuroticbookworm for holding me down while this show fell apart on me, I’ve been all in a tizzy about it, because I really loved it for awhile there.

This episode, yet again, felt like a disjointed mess. After last week’s cliffhanger, the idea of Pat resigning to get away from the predatory office gossip fell away within a few quick scenes. Instead the tension disappeared as the plot brought them into a bubble with only their most supportive colleagues and we swerved into a retread of the Put nonsense and a new plot about Jeng and Pat fighting to save the digital marketing team via the power of Put’s quasi-celebrity and Instagram likes. Or something. I honestly couldn’t tell you the details of what they were trying to accomplish, I was too distracted by my incredulity to pay close attention to this very sudden fake problem that they were obviously going to conquer (that, my friends, is what we call conflict with no stakes). Meanwhile, the show suddenly wants me to care about Jaab and Jen again - enough to devote a big portion of the penultimate episode’s runtime to them, what a choice - after doing fuck all with that plot for six weeks. It’s a no from me. 

It doesn’t matter anyway, because soon enough we’re time skipping again! After resolving the work challenge subplot we speed past another three months of Pat and Jeng’s relationship without addressing any of their issues, and I guess I’m supposed to be at peace with being a full nine months into their relationship with no onscreen emotional advancement? But I gotta be honest, y’all. I am not. You just don’t do this with a slow burn romance narrative. You can’t spend 80% of your runtime building to something that you have no intention of paying off, and no amount of thinking about what else this show is trying to say is going to convince me they did proper justice to the relationship. I already broke down why I didn’t think the episode 10 culmination got us there, and nothing that happened in this episode changed my opinion.

And all of this is leading to yet another time jump - two entire years this time - after the big reveal that Jeng doesn’t believe in Pat at all and literally bought his success, Evil Daddy knew it all along and waited for a choice moment to deploy the info for maximum damage while twirling his villain mustache, and Pat is finally quitting for real and dumping Jeng for good measure.

And ya know what? GOOD FOR PAT. I was completely on his side in this decision. If there’s one bright spot in this episode (other than Chot, always Chot) it’s Pat getting himself together enough to realize he deserves better than the bullshit he’s been getting from Put and Jeng and walking on out. So Jeng and Pat are now broken up, but I never got invested in their relationship in the first place, because we barely saw it, let alone got the chance to live in and feel it. I wasn’t even upset while watching this breakup scene - it left me emotionally indifferent. Which is maybe the worst thing I can say about a dramatic climax in a story.

I guess next week we’ll meet Jeng and Pat again two years in the future and get some kind of happy ending. I’m gonna stick around for the finale and cross my fingers that we get all the epilogue fluff we have definitely earned, but sadly, this show has lost me.

#step by step #thai bl #shan shouts into the void

[locklyle1kanij]

I wrote this whole review for good reads but i also wanted to post it here. I’m hoping that someone who either hasn’t heard of the books of hasn’t been convinced to read the books yet will find this!

I wanted to come here and write a review on all the books because i hope at least one of my reviews will convince someone to read these books.

Okay so i’m a pretty big reader and my favourite series before i read Lockwood And Co was Six Of Crows, which is still one of my favs but like i would just say if you read and enjoyed SOC i can almost promise you that you’ll like Lockwood and Co it’s got a lot of similarities like the found family which by the way this book series does amazingly, found family is my favourite trope, tell me a book has found family in it and i’m most likely gonna read it. But the found family in Lockwood And Co is definitely hands down my favourite found family! Like the characters dynamic with each other is just so perfect, and i’m obsessed with, as the series goes on the found family only grows larger!!

Also another thing i’m obsessed with in this book series is the plot. I don’t like ghost stuff, it’s not my preferred genre, but with Lockwood and Co i absolutely love the spookiness of it all. The cases that the characters take with the ghosts are always so interesting and the way Jonathan Stroud (the author) made different types of ghosts that all have different weaknesses and strengths!! I will never not be obsessed with just the world of Lockwood and Co in general especially since it’s British, I love books taking place in Britain! Also i just wanted to say the books only get better the farther you read into the series, like for me my favourite book of the series in the fourth one. So if you liked the first one but your not sure if you really want to continue this series i would say at least read till the third one then choose if you wanna keep reading.

Okay if your one of those people who feel like they can’t read a book without at least a bit of romance, me too honestly. If someone ever try’s to tell you Lockwood And Co doesn’t have romance in it, send them to me because i’m more then willing to educate them okay. I love books with a good romance sub plot and this book is in no way a disappointment in that. If you like slow burn like i do (Like Kaz and Inej or another fan fav, Percy and Annabeth) i can tell you, your definitely gonna fall in love with Lucy Carlyle and Anthony Lockwood! They’re slow burn is DEFINITELY a slow burn but it’s pretty obvious that even from the beginning that they’re not just friends or even colleges. Even the author confirmed in multiple times and even if he hadn’t i was already confident that they were a relationship that’s gonna last a lifetime. You know when you read books with a cute little romance in them but once your done the book your like, Ya no that’s not gonna be a long term relationship right there. Well this book series is not like that. Lockwood and Lucy are there for each other, always there to protect each other with their life if necessary but not only that, but something i will never get over from these’s books is how even though they’ve been through all they have in life it’s not about dying for each other, but it’s about how they fight to LIVE for each other and you see more of that character growth together through your the series as they grow up into the people that they are at the end of the series, and i just think that’s super beautiful.

Even though this book series was, at least at first marketed to the youth, i think any age can enjoy it. I was worried at first before i read the books (I watched the show first) that i wouldn’t be able to enjoy the books as much as if i was reading them when they first came out but honestly now after reading and rereading all the books i think i can honestly say that i might have enjoyed the books more. Some of the points of the books very lightly skim over some more serious topics that i don’t think i would have noticed if i was younger while reading these books. I’m not going to give any specific examples because i want this to be a spoiler free review but just know that i have actually examples i’m thinking of right now while i’m writing this. So i’m not just making it up on how it, even thought it’s not marketed to an younger audience, does touch on some deeper topics.

If you read this all, first of all wow that’s a lot of writing to read lol. I’m sorry, i’m a pretty big fan girl over this series. But everything i wrote here i believe whole heartily. I would go on for longer honestly, but i’m afraid if i write much more i’ll start spoiling the books so I’m just gone leave it here. Please Please just try out these books. You’ll be doing yourself a huge favour. Also right now a comic book is in the works for this series so you should read the books before that comes out! Byeee thank you for reading my rant!

#book recs #found family trope #slow burn romance #character development #book series recs #amazing main characters #book review #save lockwood and co #british books #READ IT #spoiler free review

[cc-tinslebee]

characters that have definitely worked at a movie theater because I’ve been working nonstop for four days and I need to cope-

Robin Buckley

^ live footage of me at work

pretty sure this was made canon by Rebel Robin and it was the movie theater Steve’s friends vandalised in season 1!! I don’t know why she stopped working there but she just like me fr

hates ushering because of the amount of older people and classmates that are rude to her. box office can be similar but she only has to deal with a rude customer once in a while, so it’s a lot chiller

Van Palmer

I wholeheartedly believe she worked in a movie theater pre-crash, by sheer proximity of her little video store in the adult timeline. TaiVan movie theater dates are real to me </3

gets sleeby at box office but enjoys ushering and concessions because there’s the most to do. Definitely doesn’t sneak Tai and Nat in through the back of the theater and slip away from work to visit them

Mindy Meeks-Martin

She would eat UP those free/discounted movie tickets working at a movie theater gives you. She def used that to take Tara and Amber to see Nope 🫶

video stores are dead (rip) so this is the self fulfilling Meeks prophecy (gotta fill out those parallel the original requirements y’know). Had a ill-fated co-worker romance as is tradition

Randy Meeks

He worked at one for, like, a summer, and decided he liked working at the video store WAY more (why get free theater tickets when you gets discounts on renting movies you can watch over and over again?)

Liked box office the most so he could talk to customers about their movie choices, either complimenting them on their taste or maybe not-so-silently judge them. Stu, Sidney, and Tatum (occasionally just Stu and Billy) would always come to his theater to terrorise him (lovingly)

Richie Kirsch

also eats up those free movie tickets. felt bad about not giving money to the franchise he loves when he went to see Stab 8 but after leaving the theater furious and disappointed, his tune about that def changed

Richie’s capable of being a charming (if not awkward) guy, so he definitely did great at being a greeter. Richie in the box office is pretty similar to Randy, enthusiastically talking to customers about the movies they’re seeing (though he’s a little more quiet with his disapproval lmao). He’s the epitome of “if you see me at work, do not trust that mf. That’s work Richie. I go to work, put on a smile, and just black out.” me fr

Tabby Hawthorne

another canon one but she and Mouse are the only mfs I could stand in this show and I can confirm local small theaters don’t do background checks smh 🤦 if you or a person you know has been personally victimized by a weird male employee at your local movie theater you may be entitled to financial compensation

Lester Averman

I was about to say Guy but then I remembered Averman canonically worked at a theater in D2!!!!

I’m gonna assume he worked at someplace big and fancy like AMC, so he probably shifted between concessions, greeter, and usher. BITCHES about working usher (his co-workers are so sick of him fr) because despite doing hockey, the soreness half way through a shift is real. Gets put up front as greeter the most, snoozes whenever he’s put in box office. He likes working concessions the best (and definitely doesn’t steal food from the company)

Guy Germaine (+ Connie Moreau)

fuck it, these two join Averman next summer at the movie theater and terrorise their co-workers by being so obnoxiously in love (martial problems? Never heard of her)

Guy is a naturally charming greeter (to Averman’s eternal annoyance) and customers absolutely adore him. Connie can’t be in box office anymore because she refuses to take shit from rude customers (and Guy just gets mildly annoyed, and Connie jumps to his defense). So now Connie just bounces between the different shifts, kinda favours ushering because she finds it (mostly) chill.

Eric Bemis

^ more live footage of me at work

Eric is a concessions guy and if he works at a big theater like AMC he’s certifiably insane, I hate that part I hate it here. Definitely can get overwhelmed by it but he prefers it over the strain of working usher and the rude people are mostly up at box office and he’d end up so anxious, he’d let minors into R-rated movie. Rip king fly high 😔🕊

will probably update if I think of anymore but thanks for indulging my ramblings

#movie theater #robin buckley #stranger things #scream #mindy meeks martin #Mindy meeks #yellowjackets #van palmer #vanessa palmer #randy meeks #stu macher #billy loomis #tatum riley #sidney prescott #richie kirsch #tabby haworthe #pretty little liars original sin #the mighty ducks #lester averman #Les Averman #guy germaine #connie moreau #guyconnie #eric bemis #santa clarita diet

[veronicaleighauthor]

Levin and Kitty

Leo Tolstoy wrote the multi-faceted novel, “Anna Karenina” as somewhat of a cautionary tale. The romance between Anna and her lover Vronsky was ill-fated from the start, yet since the novel was published, the passion between the two has been glorified as “true love.” Somehow committing adultery and abandoning your spouse and child and living in exile with a lover is romantic. Anna Karenina refuses to give up her lover, despite her husband’s threats and eventual forgiveness. She leaves her husband and son behind and runs off to be with Vronsky. Her choice is not without its consequences. Anna is ostracized by society, whereas Vronsky is free to go where he pleases. Feeling isolated, she falls into a deep depression and when her love for him is no longer enough to live for, she throws herself in front of a train.

Though Anna Karenina’s storyline was true to life, I could never quite connect to it. I had sympathy and understanding for her, but it wasn’t what drew me in. There was another part of the novel that fascinated me.

Levin and Kitty.

Levin and Kitty play second-fiddle to Anna and Vronsky, however, it is their love that stands the test of time. While their romance is smiled upon by society, maybe considered boring” by the world’s standards, and has its ups and down, theirs embodies the notion of “true love” in its purest form.

Konstantin Levin had known the Shcherbatsky family since he was young and wanted nothing more than to be a member of it. Overtime he falls in love with the youngest Shcherbatsky daughter, Kitty, and though there is an age gap, contrasting religious beliefs and opposite temperaments, their differences complement each other. Unfortunately for Levin, Kitty’s head has been turned by the handsome and charming Alexei Vronsky…the same Vronsky who seduces Anna Karenina (he may be charming and good-looking, but I can’t stand Vronsky). Vronsky flirts with Kitty, leading her to believe that he feels more for her than what he really does. And Kitty, being young and naïve, fancies herself in love.

When Levin does work up the courage to propose to Kitty and she turns him down, he is devastated and retreats from society, secluding himself to his farm. Kitty expects a proposal from Vronsky and is confused when he pulls away and takes up with the married Anna Karenina. Her disappointment leads to sickness…heart sickness. She soon realizes that she had turned away a good and honest man, one that she could have had a future with.

Levin is determined to hate Kitty for refusing him, but his love for her won’t allow him. He comes to understand that perhaps he had not been the most dedicated suitor, distancing himself at times when he should have made his intentions clear.

Stiva, Levin’s friend, intervenes and does a little matchmaking, which leads to Levin and Kitty socializing once more. Through a game of letters, Levin relays his love to Kitty and proposes once more. This time Kitty accepts. However, the course of true love mirrors real life, as it does not run smooth for these two. Levin feels he must be honest with his future wife about the more sordid details of his past and shows Kitty his diary. Although upset, Kitty forgives him of his sins. On the day of the wedding, Levin gets cold feet and is about to call it off when Kitty convinces him that she loves him and wants to marry him. The wedding goes on without a hitch.

            Levin and Kitty are generally happy, though their union isn’t perfect. Levin is used to a solitary life while Kitty wants to spend all of her time with him and is more social. Their love is put to the test when Levin learns that his brother is on his deathbed. He has no intention of bringing Kitty, but she insists and is a comfort when his brother passes away. Their struggles are rewarded with the birth of their firstborn son. Though frightened by the prospect of being a father, Levin falls in love with his child.

He has personal troubles, including an identity crisis. He struggles through his own bouts of depression and searches for the meaning of life. In the past he was a skeptic of God and of the Russian Orthodox Church. But he eventually makes peace with God and finds his own happy ending with his family.

Levin and Kitty’s romance best illustrates 1 Corinthians 13:4-8:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 

It’s Levin and Kitty’s romance that gives me hope. It’s a love story of second chances – and that’s what we all need from time to time. A second chance.

#anna karenina #konstantin levin #kitty shcherbatsky #leo tolstoy #period drama #anti vronsky

[izzabeean]

Chapter 12 : You’ve Got A Way

pairing : fushiguro toji x fem!reader

warnings/tags : 18+, alternate universe - office, eventual romance, explicit language.

genre : angst + fluff + smut

word count : 1,841

a/n : hi everyone! I am currently suffering, because I realized we are more than halfway through this series and my mind hasn't fully accepted the fact - tbh I thought it'd be writing this series forever. this has become more of a slow burn than I initially drafted it to be, but let's be real y'all, I'm a sucker for the chemistry that ignites between two people before they get together. so get comfy and enjoy this chapter because the next is going to be a game changer (sorry to tease about it, I'm just excited to write it).

hopefully this will help y'all get through the week (it definitely did for me!) xx

18+ minors dni!!!

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The dark room floods Toji in a state of melancholy treachery. Is it safe to assume hiding from the real world is the perfect antidote to the goal that just slipped from his fingers? Or perhaps he should continue to drink his frustration away until his wallet is penny less. He’s always been and always will be a failure.

He shifts in his bed to see a peak of sunlight streaming through the closed curtains. God, his head hurt so much. Even the dimmed rays shoot a sharp pain to his temples – the perfect sign to close his eyes and sleep it off. Or maybe he needs another drink. Who knows. No answer can ever be correct in this state of mind he will forever live in. This is  exactly what he gets for trying to live an honest life. But it wasn't even that honest, since he took the fall for something he never did...

It’s all the same shit day, in and day out, and of course, he was so  stupid  to think that things would be different now. They weren’t. Never would be. He’s only been spared from what could have been worse though.  You  could've made him so much worse. And yet you’re still on his mind even after the last uncomfortable interaction.

He can’t show his face back at the office, could he? Not when the last look you gave him was something between dreadful and disappointing. Though he considers himself to be both of those things, you didn’t even utter a word to him as he left. He’d hope you’d come up with some kind of witty charismatic statement, just anything instead of silence.

But honestly, maybe you were just as weak as he was. Maybe, just maybe your intention to push him to finish that project was just a way to move towards a more notable position in the company. You never actually cared about his success, you were just pushing him to make him more miserable.

And yet, he still wants to see you again.

Things were always cut too short between the two of you and it made Toji just want to be around you more. It was spineless of him, yes. Somehow he didn’t really care. He felt like he was getting to know the woman you truly are and he liked it. A lot in fact.

Is it weird to think you two could have gotten somewhere? Especially since you'd exposed another side of yourself to him. He thought he had you, that you'd be like putty in his hands. And the day he got fired, he really swore that if Kaito didn't interrupt the two of you, something could have happened. Something he's been long awaiting.

The subtle noise of Toji’s phone vibrates in the background. He turns to take a look at who’s name is illuminating the screen. It’s Kong. Frankly, Toji hasn’t even spoken to him since the incident, he’s been ignoring his calls, hoping in time Kong will take the hint. But he’s a lot more stubborn than Toji remembers and he feels himself start to give in.

With a sigh, he leans over to answer the call.

  It didn’t take Toji too much convincing to get out of bed when Kong persuades him with a couple of drinks. So here he is, sitting at the bar, already starting on his first drink. He wasn’t so keen on going to Suki’s in the first place, wanting to stay as far away from his old office as he possibly could. But there’s a part of him that hopes that he will run into you. 

“Fushiguro,” Kong’s voice booms. “Thought you’d never show your face again.”

Toji's eyes snap quickly over to Kong who is standing with his briefcase slung over his shoulder.

“Can’t get rid of me that easily,” Toji says with a chuckle. He also can't so easily get rid of you constantly racing in his mind as he looks behind Kong wondering if you’d be there. He wished his brain never went there cause that tinge of hope just blossomed into more disappointment.

Toji slams the rest of his drink back, not even taking a beat while Kong takes a seat beside him. He lets out a relieved sigh as the sound of the glass hits the bar, eyes searching for the bartender. 

“You already owe me one,” Toji says before ordering his next drink. 

Kong orders the exact same carefully scanning Toji and Toji can feel his judgment. As he watches the drink being made, his eyes grow hungrier and hungrier by the second, craving the warm embrace of alcohol.

“You ok?” Kong asks taking a newly made drink into his hands, gaze locked onto Toji.

“‘The fuck you talkin’ about?" He dodges the question and picks up the glass swirling it before taking a sip.

"Just pace yourself, ok?" Kong chimes in, the sound of concern wearing in his voice.

"Believe me, I’ve paced myself enough," Toji fires back.

“Just enough until you got yourself fired?” A voice barges into the conversation. 

Toji turns his head to see the person behind the voice who very quietly sits beside him. And to his surprise it’s you. You clear your throat before calling out for the bartender, but you didn’t need to as he was already there. The glimmering look in the bartender's eyes only gazes upon you whilst the rest of the patrons get a neutral stare. You’re a good-looking lady, how could no one look at you in that way? So why is this good-looking lady sitting beside a disappointment?

“You know I’d take you for a liar, but the stunt you pulled is a new look for you,” you continue, eyes forward, not even interested in looking his way.

“Didn’t take you for a stalker type,” Toji interjects, ignoring your comment. “Thought I was the one with that title.”

“Pft, who even comes to a bar so close to the job they got fired from?”

“I actually asked him to meet me here,” Kong interrupts, making his presence known to you. 

Quickly, you snap your head over your eyes darting to Kong first, then to Toji. But your eye contact isn’t long as you seem to be quite embarrassed gazing into the deep emeralds of his soul.

“It’s funny ‘cause I don’t really see you around here,” Toji inquires leaning in closer. “Did ya come lookin’ for someone?”

“Fu– Now aren’t we feeling cocky?” You hiss. “Just for that… I think you owe me a drink.”

“How about you owe me a drink for the hell ya put me through.”

“Excuse me?”

“For making me start a project over when I could’ve just been fired a long time ago.”

“So, you didn’t lie about your indecency?”

Silence stifles between the two, as Kong slowly rises from his chair mumbling that he will be going out for a smoke, noting he didn’t want to be involved in a lovers quarrel. 

Lovers quarrel.

Now isn’t that optimistic thinking, to actually be in a quarrel with the one you love? But this wasn’t  love  . Nah. Toji wasn’t someone to dive into that weak emotion. This was more than just a subsequent plunge to the heart of unrequited intensity. No, this was much more devious than that. A passion that runs through his veins, he can only long for it as the days go by. It’s pleasant and shallow, nothing deep or it will swallow him whole. It had to be  lust . Wanting you so bad that his bones ache, no temporary relief can subside his frustration besides the idea of fucking you silly beneath him. Holding you down with all his strength, just so he can unravel the growing need to expel inside you. 

Like a predator watching his prey, Toji’s eyes dim while a smirk creeps on his lips. “Didn’t realize you’d get so worked up over me.”

“Pft, you’re just drunk,” You snap. 

“Are you  that upset that I got fired?” He leans in closer to you.

“God, you smell like booze.”

“Why don’t you drop the act,” he says. Nonchalant, in fact, as if he’s rehearsed this one hundred times in his head. But he hadn’t. He can feel his heart beating so hard he swears you can hear it. “It’s obvious we are both after the same thing.”

It’s obvious you know what he means. Yet, you still put on a stern look. Where’s the bashfulness he saw written on your face like the other day?  

“And what would that be?” You smirk.

“C’mon, are you going to make me say it?”

You don’t say a word, neither of you is willing to say it, instead, you both continue to gaze into each other's eyes, listening to the ambiance of the bar and the clinking of glasses.

“Fushiguro.” You say, breaking the silence. Anticipation rises in his chest as you lean in closer as if you’re contemplating something. He doesn’t know if he wants to know.

So he answers with a firm kiss on the lips. It’s so deep and longing and fiery that some may have taken notice in the bar of the public display of affection. It was a promiscuous one, a passionate one, and all the stars aligned in that one moment. He didn't think this is all he wanted, of course, he needed more. He needed you. And it had to be now.

But you retract back into your seat, bringing your drink to your lips again and taking a long sip.

Toji says your name. You look at him again, swallowing the drink hard. 

“You don’t know what you’re doing,” you say.

He pauses. The words seemed to jab at him all at once. It still echoes in his mind and he admits it could be that he’s nearly falling apart, yet he really wants you. So yes, drinking and sleeping all day may not be the ultimate treatment to cure his undeniable curse, but maybe you are.

Getting up from your seat, you throw cash on the bar and don’t say anything more. He finds himself frozen as he watches you walk away and out of the bar.

He frowns, staring at your half-empty glass of alcohol, wondering if he’d read into everything wrong this entire time. He’s never been rejected, so the pit in his stomach makes him feel uneasy about the outcome of his actions.

His eyes seem to wander down the bar stopping at a woman sitting alone finishing up her drink. It’s been a while since he’s got laid and somehow the opportunity tasted a bit sweeter down on his luck. Maybe it wasn’t the brightest of ideas, but as he throws back the rest of the smokey liquor, his eyes fade at the ingestion of what he only hopes can shut the guilt of a one-night stand. He wishes he didn’t have to do this. He wishes he could just continue drinking, but his cock seems to steer him wrong.

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tags: @brumous11 @cosmotoic @slurptheskinoffshiggysfatdick @gojosoath​ @miraes-world​ @almondespresso​​​​

if you wish to be tagged, please comment on the masterpost (I’m sorry if I miss anyone, please send a dm if I do).

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #toji jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #Jujutsu Kaisen #jujutsu kaisen toji #Toji #toji jjk #toji x reader #jjk toji #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk angst #toji fushiguro angst #toji fushiguro #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x you #toji fushiguro smut #toji zenin

[camuslittlesister]

All the Okita in Otome, ranked. Or not.

I had a bit of a hiatus while dealing with real life and shit, but I finally got around to playing all the games I know have been translated into English. Here’s the ultimate ranking of all the variations of my otome husbando.

Destined to Love (Cybird)

Please please please can you pull this app and redo it as Ikémen Bakumatsu with Yamada doing the art? I cannot deal with Okita, Sōji Okita of the Shinsengumi, whose swordmanship is nothing short of legendary, looking like some edgy marshmallow. C’mon, guys. You’re taking all sorts of liberties with history already, why stop there and not make him look the part? Just make Hijikata even hotter, everything will be fine.

Era of Samurai: Code of Love (Voltage)

Still one of my favourites even after venturing into the realm of premium games, although he looks too much like Leon for my liking (I guess that’s what you get with Voltage and also a byproduct of my refusal to even contemplate ever liking that lion even though, like for Iori in SITS, I clearly do and I just refuse to admit it, although I did exactly that a moment ago). His modern AU stereotypical indie kid version is everything. It’s like they made him for me.

Hakuoki (Otomate/Idea Factory)

Why do I love this Morikubo-voiced jerk more than my actual life? I have many questions to ask of myself and I don't even know if I really want to know the answers, but I have spent about £50 so he can be on my wall alongside another less jerky Morikubo character in what is slowly and not deliberately turning into a shrine to the man himself since his characters dominate my merch purchases. (Author’s note: This post has been a cumulative draft over a year or so, and I wrote this pre-Piofiore. It’s only gone worse since)

Hakuoki Sweet School Life

The god of chaos and love of my life. That’s it.

The Amazing Shinsengumi

Side note, what is it with games making Harada the hot one? Also let me romance this Hijikata please and thank you.

He’s hella cute and double-faced, which I tend to like, but also he appears to go through every trope I don’t like in the span of a conversation. 6/10, although solid 10 for looks. In fact, make it 20/10. Top 3 for looks with Voltage and Hakuoki.

Ninja Shadow

I keep forgetting that I did play this Okita (and it was my first while at that...) but even with that dream ponytail it’s not the greatest version. He’s a jokester, which is fun, and he hides a big dollop of angst as it’s right and just, but he was a bit OTT with the humour and it’s a strange storyline that does him a disservice.

Bakumatsu Renka Shinsengumi

If he doesn’t threaten to kill you is he even Okita? I’m living for that one CG that looks like he is Kondō and Hijikata’s kid, but aside from it being probably the most historically accurate of the otome portrayals (at least in localised games) he started off a bit of a disappointment for the same reason as Destined to Love. He was also not helped by the fact that Shinpachi has a brain, Sakamoto and Yamazaki exist and (omg, can’t believe I’m saying this) Hijikata and that line about loving his woman in Sanan’s route. However, when actually playing his scenes etc, he grew on me. I would happily go raise cats and babies with him like I would with his Hakuoki and Era of Samurai incarnations.

Dateless Love

I have questions. Why is this version Iba’s lovechild with Saito?

Why is he like Gin in Ayakashi Gohan if he was a soldier? Don’t get me wrong, I’m a major sucker for lovely characters going full on deadly from a moment to the next, so I’m digging it, I’m just extremely disoriented because Voltage is my canon Okita personality (Hakuoki took that and turned it up a notch and ruined my life in the process) and every deviation I’m like “new number who dis?”

It took him 10 chapters to show a hint of the teasing we all know and love. TEN. Out of like 15. I have had three kids with Tokugawa by now (and I don’t even do blondes. Except Ayumu. And best boy. And omg I’m still in the Kiro phase but also could be a Helios phase soooo 🫣 okay, fine, I do blondes). It was really cute tho and I watched him die in the good ending which is a plus.

[facav]

Some Friendships need no Words Uttered

This is a simple crossover between Doom Eternal and Metal: Hellsinger in which two metal hell walkers cross each other's paths. Warning for descriptive violence, maybe, I don't know. Oh and there is absolutely no romance here. Enjoy!

Year 2151. Earth has been invaded by hordes of Hell. The invasion started in Central Europe, and then it rapidly spread all over the globe. All the world’s military firepower wasn’t enough to stop the demons and the battle for Earth was nearly lost. Human population dwindled at exceptional pace. Cities demolished and enveloped in organic cancerous growth that emerged from the portals that light up randomly and everywhere. What’s left of humanity can easily all fit on one mobile over-sea carrier under the guise Armored Response Coalition, or ARC, the last line of defense before complete annihilation… It would all be in vain it there wasn’t a new hope on the rise. But this hope rose from the depths of Hell – the One Man – the Doom Slayer.

Nothing is known of him. Some consider him a demon, others - a God. Many are afraid of him. Nobody knows how he looks like underneath the helmet. However, the only thing that is known is his unsatisfied rage and hatred towards the demon kind, over which he towers, regardless of their size, and dispatches them with ease…

It was the battle of the Gore Nest – a military base hijacked by the demonic growth. The city around it was devastated – the bridges collapsed, streets littered with car wrecks, blood and bile, and what were once skyscrapers, were only burnt remains. The Slayer was standing on the 5th floor of a breached building, looking down at the destruction, calculating which road to take towards the Nest. Some demons who can’t seem to settle something between themselves were running amok.

He hears a quiet footstep behind him and turns rapidly. Eyes fixed on a strange unknown figure before him. It is humanoid, winged… feminine. Caped, up to her mouth in scarves and drapes, but revealing enough to show off her crimson skin… and 3 yellow glowing eyes placed between the beautiful horns. She gestures a greeting – a silent wave.

Seeing this demonic figure, regardless of it’s shape, The Slayer was instantly fueled with rage. His eyes bulged behind his helmet, as if they were conveying his thoughts - “I will tear your wings off, rip your head off, make you choke in your blood, and rip you in half.” He didn’t utter a word, but the Unknown understood this look. She lets out a sigh, gesturing her 3 fingers as the sign of peace.

The Slayer ignores this gesture. His thoughts getting more violent: “You think that I will be fooled by a simple hand gesture? You are very naive. You should be scared of me. I am the embodiment of destruction and rage. I am the Slayer!” he prepares his shotgun and points it towards her.

This seemed visibly disappointing to the Unknown figure. You could say she was even somewhat sad? She uses her claw to scrape something into the wall and then swiftly jumps out of the hole behind her, and she does it rather elegantly. The writing on the wall said “You lack rhythm.” This little message both confused and probably offended the Slayer because he lets out an annoyed huff. Then looks after her, his mind processing violent thoughts: “I will follow you… and I will kill you. I cannot let a demon live regardless of it’s demeanor. I will rip and tear… until it is done.” And still with no word uttered, he leaps after her into the Hellish scape of what was once a city.

The Unknown soared through the sky, over the burned ruins. Carried by her wings above, she noticed The Slayer at the corner of her eye. He was following her on foot. Running in a straight line, while dispatching the demons in his way, he still kept his sight locked up, right on her. She didn’t know, because he didn’t speak, that he was thinking only of murder. He saw her as yet another challenging enemy, the demon who is responsible for the fall of humanity. He blamed her for the destruction and suffering. He wasn’t forgiving. For demons, there was only one thing they deserved… and that was death.

Suddenly the Unknown gained speed and flew ahead of the Slayer. He could see her landing in the distance. Just when he thought he had her in his corsair, the ground shook. Before her, Slayer saw a huge demon materializing. It was the Tyrant. “Now they gonna kill each other.” He thought “and then, I will finish the victor… and they will regret the day they were made.”

This is where it got fun. To his surprise, the Unknown figure pulled out a shotgun and started… dancing. Shots were fired towards the Tyrant. Violently, just like The Slayer would, but… there was something different in them. They had a different… rhythm. She was moving, dancing to each shot, and fired to each move. Soon the Tyrant was annihilated… and as the Slayer reached her, and sopped in tracks, the Unknown slowly turned towards him… and silently waved again.

He waves back, silently.

And the Unknown? She nods in acceptance.

However she was still tapping her foot to the ground at the same pace. Figuring that Slayer does not understand the situation, she points her clawed finger at her foot. This gesture made him realize… it was the rhythm. It was the key to her power. “So, this is how you do it.” He thought “You fire your weapon to the rhythm and the beat… which somehow amplifies your moves and your speed.” Amazed, Slayer thinks of making a few steps towards her so he could gesture and point his hand towards himself to ask her if he would be able do to the same… But he was interrupted.

In the distance there were explosions and unidentified screeches and roars. It was another wave of the horde and they were closing in on the two. The Unknown turns towards them, still tapping, but then looks at the Slayer, as If asking him to join her. The Slayer smirks behind his visor, and makes few steps to stands beside her, preparing his own shotgun, as if he was saying “Let’s rip and tear… in co-op.”

Suddenly they both rushed towards the incoming demons at the lightning speed, as if blinking only to catch beat. With the corner of his eye, Slayer sees her pulling out her sword and slicing through limbs, always to the beat, and he replicates her moves with his own melee. The more they moved, the stronger they became, until their hits were one-shot-kills.

In this carnage, as he was following her steps, the Slayer wondered: “How can she can do this? How can she gain such the power from a simple thing like the rhythm? How does that… technique differ from my own?” And it was then when it dawned on him that everything around him has its rhythm. His style, his speed and momentum were his rhythm that he failed to feel and utilize to his advantage. With this new found knowledge, the Slayer closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, as if he wanted to concentrate mid battle… Everything became slow and silent. He could hear his own breath and heartbeat, and in this state he felt it from deep within his heart – the rhythm. It took him over fast, flowing through his veins, merging with his blood… and just like that – he heard the music. Her music. She was, after all the Hellsinger.

He shakes from his nirvana and looks straight at her, over the battlefield. Her, now glowing bright yellow eyes meet his. She smiles with them, as if feeling what he feels, acknowledging his new found strength.

They don’t stop… they keep moving through the horde. Individually, both of them - a force to be reckoned with. Combined – unstoppable cosmic event. The ultimate pair, The Slayer and The Hellsinger – Destroyers of Hell.

And the music continues to play… and it was METAL.

~Fin!

#story #fan fiction #doom #doom eternal #metal #metal hellsinger #doomguy #doom slayer #the unknown #gore nest #hell #demons #Tyrant #music #rhythm #team up

[iwriteromancenovels]

chapter one

Genre: fiction, romance

Word Count: 1,522

Warnings: none

If we wait until we’re ready, we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives.

- Lemony Snicket

“Roses are red, violets are blue. Summer is hot, and so are you.” Callie McKinney glared down at the basin full of steaming, soapy water and flicked it irritatedly with her free hand. “If I had my way, I’d wash these dishes out in the pond,” she told the basin, vigorously scrubbing a plate, “but it seems that pond water isn’t very clean. Therefore, I must redden and chap and practically scald my hands in order to wash them.” She paused, almost as if waiting for a response.

The basin didn’t reply, and Callie plunged another plate into the water, perhaps a little too hard. “There! That’s what you get for ignoring me.”

Through the open window, Callie’s oldest brother Allen paused his garden work and leaned on the windowsill, grinning at his sister. “Talking to inanimate objects again?”

Callie gave her brother a knowing look. “Aren’t you the one who told me to talk nicely to my plants so they’d grow well?”

Allen laughed. “Ah, but that’s a different story. See, that basin isn’t even alive.”

“So?”

“Plants are. Haven’t you noticed that your garden and houseplants are doing a lot better since you stopped practicing sarcasm on them?” Allen pointed towards the basin. “And that basin hasn’t done a thing but sit there.”

Callie laughed ruefully. “I suppose so. Still, it’s surprisingly refreshing to talk to inanimate objects.” She set aside the last dish and dried her hands. “I need to dump this out, do you mind coming in and helping?”

Allen sighed in mock disappointment, but he left the window and Callie soon heard him come into the kitchen. “Still can’t carry the basin,” he said sadly, standing behind her and lifting it over her head with ease. A stray drop of water splashed onto Callie’s nose. “And here I thought carrying laundry all these years had made you stronger than that.”

“Laundry isn’t exactly an equal weight to a big bucket full of water,” said Callie, following her tall brother from the kitchen and out to the grass. “Five pounds of laundry and five pounds of water are very different things.”

“Yes, especially when you’ve got it backwards,” teased Allen, systematically dumping the dishwater on Callie’s prized vegetable garden. “I hope your future husband doesn’t mind doing this, because honestly, if anyone outside of our family was around, I’d not be carrying out my little sister’s woman’s work.” Allen grinned at Callie to show her he was kidding, and handed her the empty basin. “I believe I can think of a certain young man who wouldn’t mind this task.”

Callie blushed. “Allen!”

Allen laughed. “Tucker Wills certainly wouldn’t mind, now, would he? Seeing as how he’s head over heels in love with you.”

“Leo wants me to marry Jonathan, and you know it.” Callie perched the bucket atop her head like a milkmaid and balanced it with her hands all the way to the house, Allen following.

“But you don’t love either of them.”

Callie spun, the basin toppling off her head and onto the floor. “Allen McKinney!”

Allen held his hands up innocently, still laughing. “I’m just laying out the foundation of facts. Building the walls of decision is up to you.”

“The walls have already been built, and my answer to any marriage is a solid No.” Callie picked up the basin and headed for the kitchen, Allen trailing behind her like a mischievous puppy. “I’m perfectly happy staying with you guys, there’s no need for me to marry.”

“We want little nieces and nephews,” coaxed Allen.

“Then one of you guys go find a girl, marry her, get your nieces and nephews, and leave me out of it!” Callie set the basin back in its place with a finality and turned to face her brother, a rare fire in her brown eyes.

Allen backed off. “That won’t fly with Leo or Justin,” he told her. “I’d much rather not lose you to someone else. But girls are kind of supposed to get married… and I’d really hate to disappoint either of those Wills brothers.”

“Not yet.” Callie turned back to the wooden counter and began putting the dishes in the cupboards, closing off the conversation.

__________________

The sizzling smell of beef fresh from the kitchen filled the dining room as Callie lit the wall sconces and shook out the match. The table was set, the dinner was ready- the only thing missing was her brothers.

Callie turned from the wall to survey her table once more, and nodded in satisfaction. She would have liked to have been able to present a strawberry shortcake tonight, but her strawberry vines weren’t bearing fruit yet. Well, Justin would just have to wait a bit longer for his favorite dessert, and make do with the chocolate chip cookies she had substituted for the shortcake.

“Mmm, I smell beef.”

Speak of the angel, thought Callie in delight, purposely modifying the saying to better fit the person it currently referred to. “Don’t forget to eat the potatoes and carrots,” she reminded Justin as he sat down, eyes locked on the pile of browned, well-seasoned steaks.

Justin wrinkled his nose at the mention of carrots. “I hate carrots.”

“You won’t get chocolate chip cookies if you neglect that colorful part of dinner,” Callie warned, knowing full well he’d find a way to finagle some cookies from her whether he ate his carrots or not. But Justin- and all her brothers, for that matter- usually obeyed Callie on the aspect of meals, simply because they knew she would worry herself sick over their health if she didn’t oversee every morsel that they consumed.

“Oh, Callie, this looks great.” Leo came in next, still dusty from the day’s work, and sat down next to Justin after hanging his hat on the hat rack by the door. “I can’t wait to get at those carrots.”

Justin made a choking sound, and Callie couldn’t resist smirking. “I guess even the mere mention of carrots is enough to gross Justin out,” she said, purposely emphasizing the word carrots to tease him further.

“Ugh!” Justin clutched his throat dramatically and slumped backwards in his chair, drawing smiles from his siblings: Callie’s impishly pleased, and Leo’s purely amused.

Allen came in last, taking his place at the head of the table and whistling in appreciation when he got a good look at the dinner. “Man, maybe we don’t want Callie to marry off. We won’t get spoiled like this anymore!”

Callie didn’t find the joke funny, although Justin and Leo chuckled merrily. “It’s gonna get cold, so let me dish up the food,” she scolded good-naturedly, moving quickly to arrange portions of food on each of their plates. “Justin, didn’t I hear you saying earlier that you wanted a double portion of carrots?”

After the laughter had died down, and Justin had seated Callie across from Leo, Allen held out his hands to his siblings for the blessing. Heads bowed, each of the four took a turn with their part of the blessing, and ended with a unanimous “Amen!”

For the next few moments everyone was too focused on preparing their own plates the way they liked them. When that was mostly taken care of, Allen mentioned that he had gone into town that evening to pick up the new harness he had ordered. “Coming out of the shop, I ran into the younger Alistair boy,” he said, slicing off a bite-sized chunk of meat. “Callie, he said you didn’t come into work today.”

Callie, who had initially frozen at the mention of Ben Alistair, now relaxed a little. “Saturday’s my day off, he should know that by now.”

“Well, maybe you should consider reminding him. He seemed pretty disappointed that you didn’t show up.”

“Not a chance.” Callie stabbed her fork into her meat and picked up her knife. “I don’t want anything to do with Ben Alistair.”

“Ben’s nothing like his brother,” Leo reminded her, spearing a carrot. “He’s said many times that he suspects something fishy about Parker’s way of doing business.”

“How about smoky?” Callie snapped out her napkin a touch vehemently.

“Why smoky?”

“Because the second someone finds out that he’s been less than honest, his ranch is going to go up in flames.”

“Accurate,” Justin muttered under his breath, tentatively poking at a carrot with only a slightly wrinkled nose as compared to earlier.

“But that has nothing to do with Ben himself,” Leo reminded Callie. “Ben has proven to be a fine, upstanding citizen of Prairie Hills, and there’s been nothing incriminating him of anything shady.”

“Yet,” muttered Callie, splitting a roll in half and buttering both sides.

“I highly doubt that Ben will decide to go down the wrong path,” said Allen, taking a sip of water. “He works at a bank, for goodness’ sake- there’s no room to be dishonest at a bank.”

“Bank robber,” said Callie after a moment, with a mysterious glee to the words.

“Okay, change of subject,” proposed Leo, sensing that Callie wasn’t going to change her mind, at least not tonight. “How’s the garden doing, Callie?”

#western romance #romance #original writing #original character #love story #cattle ranching #1800s

[xxxdreamscapexxx]

i think the film is excellent! it captures so well some things about the book, and the way it frames the end is muuuch different than highsmith did, in my opinion for the better. but some of its other choices annoy me in terms of characterization. they’re very different works in terms of mood and affect, despite how faithful the story is to its counterpart. so i think it’s a really really interesting read if youve already seen the film. i watched the movie first too.

other favorites of mine are Madam Will You Talk (i can’t remember the author but it’s another romance from later in the fifties, sadly very straight :p), the four book Saga of Pliocene Exile series by Julian May (a science fiction story from the eighties about —among other things— the shortcomings of utopianism, reproductive rights, and those who cannot fit even in a near-perfect society), and of course Carmilla by le fanu which needs no introduction. generally i like books filled with fraught or interesting politics or the more complex love stories. that or philosophy but i assume you meant fiction novels not dry old walter benjamin and foucault :p

what about you, ma’am? what are some of your favorite books? what have you been reading lately?

~ 🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️ ~

Well, I suppose I'll have to read the book and find out. You certainly have an interesting taste in literature. I'm most familiar with Carmilla. I wasn't very impressed by the quality of writing, but I enjoyed the obsession and possessiveness, the search for a deeper connection and the lengths one might go to achieve that. Hm... Some of my favorite books are: "The Historian" by Elizabeth Kostova. It's a very well written, well-researched book. It takes you on a journey through eastern Europe and it tells a multi-layered, compelling story. I absolutely loved it the first time and re-reading it never disappoints. "Lives of the Mayfair witches" trilogy by Anne Rice is a twisted, haunting, beautiful story of the lives of a powerful family of witches. It spreads through the centuries and reveals their struggles with death, persecution, wealth and their growing power and what it means. I'm a big fan of twisted tales, so this one captured me very easily as the author absolutely disregards what is tabu, revealing shocking details about the lives of the characters. "Frankenstein" by Mary Shelly I believe needs very little introduction. I think most people are familiar with the storyline, but what the book offers that you can't see in any movie / TV show is the way Mary Shelly writes! That book is pure poetry with every word. It's gorgeous. I can't tell you enough how beautifully written it is and how much it makes you think. "Dune" by Frank Herbert is also an amazing novel. The author has some very interesting things to say on the subject of politics and philosophy, which mixed with the action and the very imaginative world-building truly captures the reader. That's off the top of my head currently, though I've loved many more books over the years. As for my latest reads... Well, actually I don't have much time to read these days, so I've been listening to audio books a lot, while driving or doing other things, but... "Ninth house" by Leigh Bardugo and the sequel "Hell bent". The author has a lot of great books (her "Shadow and bone" trilogy was incredible too) and she's been very popular these days, so I won't dive into too much detail, but her books are really good and she's also a very imaginative writer. As I like them a little twisted, she fits in quite well.

#reading #litearture #anon asks #books

[starlight-time-machine]

Week in Review

01/28/2024 – 02/03/2024

Sunday

Manga Sunday yayyyy Girl Meets Rock is getting interesting, I was totally expecting the guy from the guitar shop to walk in, but it was Rin instead. Rin herself is pretty intriguing, as it seems like she’s keeping some cards close to her chest in regards to the band…

Undead Unluck is good as usual, it’s fun to see an older and more surly Top. Another sick mom to add to the tally, though. Maybe in this loop we’ll see more details about Top and Haruka’s potential romance.

Oshi no Ko fun, the deadpan humor really got to me.

Dandadan okay, I’m a little tired of the non-stop action sequences.

Magilumiere good, obviously there’d be some drawback to Midorikawa getting the chip implanted, but I’m sure they’ll find a way to circumvent it.

One Piece good.

CIPHER ACADEMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GODDDDDD IF THIS IS THE END I’LL BE SO SADDDDDDDD I really hope it’s not…I’m holding onto Nisioisin copium so so so hard… The chapter itself was also amazing, with a look at everyone’s true backstories, Kogoe laying out her philosophy but Iroha turning it on its head, THE HANDSHAKE SPREAD WHERE IT LOOKS LIKE IROHA HAS HIS HANDS AROUND THE WORLD, EVERYONE ELSE SHAKING HANDS BUT YOU DON’T KNOW HOW SINCERE THEY ARE, MORE YOSAIMURA/ANON, TAYUTAN… The timeskip is so scary…I can’t tell if it’s the beginning of something new and everything else has just been the prelude, or if it’s a hasty jump to land some sort of epilogue… I’ll keep holding out hope but please…

Live Roulette gave me Siegfeld Junior High’s 1st Live today, so I watched/listened to it as I read a book (more on that later). I’m impressed by how far they’ve come in such a short time, especially Mtzw, whose rendition of Rebellion here was a lot stronger than in the stage play months earlier. Hinapiyo is still the reigning vocalist, though, and I’m so glad they gave her Mimorin’s descant in Watashitachi wa Mou Butai no Ue. I wish they did the arm choreography in Onikurenai… Overall it was a fun show, they’re all so cute and energetic and I appreciate all the harmonies they’re doing.

As for the book I’m reading, it’s Ring of Fire by P. D. Baccalario. It’s the first book of a series that I really liked as a child, so I’m reading it again to see if it holds up. So far, I’ve been a little disappointed…the cutaways to the random adult characters pulling the strings and talking cryptically feel like such momentum killers, and the usual “kids exploring a city on an adventure and solving puzzles” thing isn’t really grabbing me here. I do love that one scene in the beginning, when the kids are first meeting and the lights go out…I can imagine the scene so perfectly in my mind – the silence of the snowy night, the nervous excitement of meeting new people and coming across a strange situation together…it’s all so thrilling, and it’s the one scene that stuck with me after all these years. I’ve just gotten to the part where the apartment building collapses, and it’s genuinely harrowing – I can’t believe they actually killed that guy (but I don’t like how it basically amounted to a fat joke). Finally, it feels like we have some actual stakes (halfway through the book cough). I’m also seeing the bits of Harvey/Elettra and Mistral/Sheng shipping going on, I think it’s cute and I’m curious to see how they develop. (Speaking of Sheng lmao c’mon man 好 doesn’t actually mean cool, it just means good, so it’s weird to have that be his catchphrase.)

Afterwards I finally watched Day 1 of Ijigen Fes, the IDOLM@STER x Love Live! concert, and it was okay. I’m probably biased, but literally none of the IM@S songs interested me except for Tulip, which I already knew that I liked. (Thank you for having Rikako sing Tulip…they did that for me…) The Love Live girls had a decent showing, but the highlight for me was definitely KALEIDOSCORE… Liyuu’s singing is just so amazing.

Monday

Day 2 of Ijigen Fes today, and oh my GODDDDDD SHU’S PERFORMANCE WAS SO GOOD just so much fun and energy, it was like watching Avril Lavigne for real… THE NEW VERSES FOR RYOURAN VICTORY ROAD WERE SO HYPE OH MY GOD AQOURS NO LEADER TAKAMI CHIKA!!!!!!!!!! OSHIMAI NANTE NAINAINAI!!!!!!!!!! It’s so surreal seeing the Cotton Candy Ei-Ei-Oh MV playing on the huge screen in Tokyo Dome… Also Snow Halation makes me cry literally every time I see those UO’s go up ahh

Afterwards the Live Roulette dealt me AZUNA’s unit live, and it was just okay. I’m not the biggest AZUNA fan anyway, but I do like some of their songs like Maze Town and Kakushiaji. Shizuku’s solos were both great as well, and the bit with the plushies was cute, but the most memorable thing about this concert would definitely have to be Tomoriru’s goodbye…it’s so unfortunate that things turned out the way that they did, but I’m glad she gave us some great performances as Setsuna before she graduated. But man, when they all started tearing up at the end of Tokimeki Runners… (I cried again…very emotional set of lives today.)

I finished reading Ring of Fire while watching the concert, and there’s no way on god’s green earth Mr. Baccalario seriously expects me to believe there are PALANQUINS in fucking SHANGHAI in 2006??????? Or rather, I can’t believe that he believed that while writing this book LMAO for how globe-trotting and international this series sets out to be, it falls a little short with non-Western cultures. Now that I’ve finished it, there’s this feeling of…lingering disappointment. I love kids going on adventures, and I love the setting and the feeling of fate converging on these four kids, but the adventure itself was so lackluster… Most of it is just poking around Rome until they happen upon something that leads them to the next step, and by the end they’ve got a “mystical all-knowing” Romani woman straight up telling them what to do… I know the author is trying to do a “it’s all fate leading the way” thing but it just comes off as unsatisfying and being cryptic for cryptic’s sake. And for that matter, the book tries hard to give each kid their screentime, but it’s a little silly when Elettra gets all the action while Mistral’s kidnapped and subsequently rescued because the female villain “went soft” and Harvey and Sheng go into a house, get scared, leave, and contribute nothing else to the climax. The ending even points out how so many things have been left unanswered (as if it’s not confident in its own plotting), and I don’t know if they’ll be answered in the later books, but it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Like is anyone ever gonna explain the in-universe reason why the professor guy had a trunk full of teeth with letters carved onto them? Because it’s so blatantly just “cool Italian history trivia” + “oh right we need a puzzle for them to solve” shenanigans with no logical throughline. Also the villains were cheesy as all hell, oooo it’s the DEVIL and his number is SIX SIX SIX WOAHHH I know it’s a kid’s book, but come on…

Tuesday

Not gonna lie, the news that Cipher Academy is ending sent me into such a depression spiral that I just laid in bed all day playing Animal Crossing and moping and cursing Shounen Jump as a whole. I’ve never held the magazine in very high regard, as I feel like most of its big “hits” are just boring derivative battle manga (and I feel that especially with some of the newer series they’re heavily promoting…), so Cipher Academy caught me by surprise with its amazing character designs and writing and heartfelt emotion… I’ll talk more about it later in a different post, but Cipher Academy is genuinely the best manga I read in 2023 and now one of my favourite manga of all time, and I really wish it could’ve lived longer (and that I could collect it physically in English…). Excluding One Piece and Undead Unluck, I hope all of Jump’s series [COMPLIANCE VIOLATION]

Wednesday

Chainsaw Man good. Nayuta’s really in it now.

I’m continuing my anime concert and book reading duets today with AZALEA’s 1st Live and The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Perilous Journey. It felt a little weird to be watching the big Love Lives out of order when I’m literally three years behind so I chose Azalea’s live, and I was itching for a good “four kids go on an adventure” after being disappointed with Ring of Fire so I picked Perilous Journey back up. The live is fine so far – AZALEA isn’t one of my favourite subunits, but the new songs from their full album were such bangers that I had to check this live out. The light choreography in SKY JOURNEY was actually kind of amazing, I wish Love Live did more stuff like that.

Perilous Journey is fun so far, just some good ol’ adventuring with a dash of mortal peril.

Thursday

The new Dungeon Meshi was really fun. I’m trying to keep up a tradition of making/eating good food to go with the episode (so far it’s been fenzhenrou, meatballs, and soup), so today was homemade hash browns…not necessarily the healthiest thing, but I had to make something in a jiffy and it was either that or not eat anything so I think Senshi would let me slide. Lots of great comedy moments, but also I love how the ghost chapter really has a whole self-contained thematic arc that’s even topped off with a sitcom-esque punchline at the end. I love Laios being a weird guy and having fun with his sword parasite buddy.

I read a big chunk of Perilous Journey today, and what a perilous journey indeed. But it’s so satisfying to see the kids use their wits and abilities to solve each clue and thwart their pursuers, as well as eerie to see the “ghost” of Mr. Benedict and Number Two along the way. What I’m noticing is how much care Trenton Lee Stewart gives to each of the kids’ emotional states – in contrast to Ring of Fire where each kid basically had one defining personality trait to set them apart and nothing else, Reynie, Kate, Sticky, and Constance all feel really fleshed out and real, each with their own worries and perspectives and ways of thinking. (Sorry to compare you, Baccalario, but I can’t deny that it was on my mind since I read this right after Ring of Fire.) I especially love Reynie as a protagonist and a leader for the other kids, his keen emotional intelligence and observation skills means that he’s usually careful about what he says and is constantly keeping an eye out for the others’ wellbeing. There’s a lot of subtle character writing going on here, and each pair within the quartet have a distinct and believable dynamic. Story-wise, I think I prefer the set-up of the first book a little more – at least when they were in that institute, they had some room to breathe and regroup and feel safe in each other’s presence. Here it’s just non-stop action and pursuit, which has me anxious the whole time.

Friday

Drag Race time: I really don’t care for Plane Jane and all the drama she’s causing, it’s just annoying at this point. I hope they don’t try to solve a redemption arc down our throats but it’s looking likely. The girl groups were fun, I hate to say it but I actually do like the style that recent RuPaul songs are going for. I’m just glad that Nymphia is holding her own through all these different types of challenges. Runway-wise, I really liked Q’s look as it all looked well put together and considered, BUT OH MY GODDDDD NYMPHIA JUST STEALS THE SHOW EVERY TIMEEEEEE. I’m sad to see Amanda go…

I don’t usually talk about music on here (because cataloguing every new song I listen to would be insane, even for me), but Louie Zong released a new album called RAT TAXI and I think I’m going to induct it into the STM Awards…which I think is a first for Week in Review? I just love the beats and the instruments he used on this one, and there’s not a single song I don’t like, which is my only criteria for albums to make it in. So yayyyy

Saturday

Touched grass today and went home and immediately fell asleep

#week in review #2024

[asterinblythe]

affair of the heart

hello ! long time no post. this is me procrasinating all my school works. my posts have never been constant so maybe, if you enjoy the things i write, just visit my account every 6 months. today, i have another love problem. 

as someone who has never had a lover since the day they were pushed out of their mother’s vagina, i can say that i never want to go through the excruciating experience that is love. i’m sure every hopeless romantic can relate when i say that we enjoy the idea of love. we love watching, reading, thinking about love. it provides us with the feeling we have been wanting for ever since we discovered the existence of it. yet, when we encounter love, we feel intimidated. we are confronted by love and suddenly, the world turns gray. it’s not like the illusion we have been looking at our entire lives. it’s messy, confusing, scary, all the feelings we never knew could be connected to love. we then say, “love’s not for me”. 

if you can sympathize with what i just said earlier, unfortunately, i’m not here to give any advice. i am here to talk about a side of me that deals with all the romance in my life. i am here to talk about my love life. it’s just pure delusion but honestly, if it fuels the hollow and empty parts of my life, so be it. 

i have been liking this person ever since they started to occupy a portion of my time during the day. i remember enjoying every part of it. i enjoyed spending my time talking to someone other than the people surrounding the four corners of my house. i imagined it was like those romcoms where they would text back and forth and then, they lived happily ever after. unfortunately, mine wasn’t like that. i would describe it as a show that is just full of cliffhangers and never coming to a conclusion. it was confusing. in the end, i just had to come to a conclusion myself. 

i concluded that they weren’t really interested in me. they were probably just using me as pastime. they were never really interested in me in the first place. in fact, not a speck of romance was found in our relationship. the label found was acquaintances. no matter how often i go through this experience, i will always find myself to be disappointed and bitter. when you play a game and you have this level you can never seem to beat, you would think to yourself that “this is the day i will beat this level and advance through the next”. you know what to do, you know what’s going to happen next, and then, you fail and have to repeat the level all over again. you always fall right into the trap that is obviously laid out in front of you. would that be the moment you would consider yourself a failure and stop playing the game overall? yes but also, no. 

as much as i hate feeling hurt everytime i fail in my experiences with love, i can’t help but be hopeful that the next might be the one. i have always seen the bad side of love, thinking that the good ones are only found in pieces of fiction. however, as i go on this journey in life, i realized that i was completely wrong. love is beautiful. love is amazing. it’s such a beautiful thing to witness. i love seeing couples find different ways to express their love towards one another. i love seeing the different ways to love someone. platonically, romantically, you name it. love can be exhausting. it can seem like a grayish world with no trace of color to be found. yet, it doesn’t look that way forever. when the love we deserve comes into our lives, i hope we keep in mind that this is not some just shooting star moment that just comes in because we are extremely lucky people. love will come to us at the perfect moment even if it isn’t in your desired schedule. it may be right in front of you. who knows? 

#loser behavior #love again #heart #blabbering #this is something #go to sleep #i beg

[firebirdsdaughter]

Sigh…

… The thing about Voyager is that… I understand why they didn’t canonise Chakotay and Janeway. There’s some valid meta reasons for that, from character-wise to general implications.

But I will never understand shoving him off w/ Seven. My mother, who is much more Trek-knowledgable than I, has a whole analysis over why they did that—namely she thinks it was to avoid having to deal w/ the complicated aspects/implications of Seven having to encounter her human family; or more properly, the family of the person she was pre Borg.

I have to take her word for that, bc after I found out it put me off the show, but I do think there was a level of cowardice involved. Namely, that they were afraid of not confirming Janeway or Chakotay into a relationship to ‘justify’ them not canonising it, in a way? But here’s the thing, they didn’t need to do that. Honestly, a tragic story about two people loving each other but not being able to be together would have been interesting. A ‘if we had met in different circumstances.’ But equally as fine would have been leaving them as they were. I complain about how PR SPD introduced Doggie’s wife for largely the same reason—writers wanting a ‘excuse’ for not making two characters romantically involved. Just like Kat and Doggie (or their PR counterparts if I’m mixing up names), Janeway and Chakotay could have remained exactly as they were, and there wouldn’t be an issue. Would people keep shipping them? Yes, but if any writer thought they’d put a stop to that through canonising another relationship, boy have they been living under a rock. There’s no need to introduce a character (esp a female one that you’re just gonna use a plot device) or shoehorn in a romance just to ‘explain’ why these two aren’t/can’t be together. Those of us who are sensible are disappointed, but we’ll live. Those who throw a fuss aren’t worth your time.

Additionally, I feel like the sudden romance isn’t fair to Seven, either. She’s uncomfortable dealing w/ family relations, but suddenly a romance is fine? I know ‘they were her family before’ but to me that indicates she’s still unsure of who she is and who she wants to be, and that doesn’t feel like a good place to start a romantic relationship.

#Firebird Randomness #Romance #not tagging show bc I'm no experienced fan or anything #I'm just musing #it's like… this fear of just letting things be #you don't HAVE to make two characters romantic #or at least you don't have to confirm it #there's a nice tragedy about them never being able to be canon anyway #you don't have to tie everything up in a little bow #star crossed lovers ain't never hurt anyone #and writers shouldn't be afraid of complex open topics

[thequillandscreen]

I had to make this post after seeing this amazing post because this needs to be said for all new viewers of TDJ. 

I can actually confirm that the writer did intend for Yohan and Gaon’s relationship to be gay. 

Ji Sung said their relationship was one of “seduction”. At the Devil Judge press-con, he confirmed that his role was that of Mephistopheles (around the 23 min mark but I’m at work and can’t pinpoint rn loL) who “seduces” Gaon who is Faust. I’ve analyzed this in more detail in this post. 

Writer Moon Yoo Seok has been very open about his influences in crafting Yohan and Gaon’s relationship being: Beauty and the Beast, Goethe’s Faust, and the movie Let The Right One In .

All these influences are either romantic or homoerotic. All of them. 

The writer has also confirmed that Gaon occupies a traditionally female character and feminine gender role. He’s used tropes that we normally only see in heterosexual romances for Yohan and Gaon’s romance. A non-exhaustive list:

living together

snooping through the mysterious house of the man who’s whisked you away

undressing your partner and wound-tending

making him food, refusing let anyone eat unless said man returns

understanding him like no other, being the only one who sees through his facade to the loneliness within

choosing him over everyone else (ep 8 and then end of 15)

trying to die for him (twice)

defending him to the het love/past love, everyone around really

PINING, yearning (Gaon literally looked at the bed in ep 16 and thought back to shirtless Yohan okay)

taking care of each other

being vulnerable before and for each other

oogling him shirtless (both of them did this)

hand holding

DEEP. STARES.

sexy bomb defusal

love triangles (K and Soohyun)

Homosexuality is so taboo in Korea that the closest we’ve gotten to proper rep is the wlw couple from Nevertheless and Kim Seo Hyung’s character from Mine, and even then that’s because men find it easier to see women in love with each other than men being in love. And men finance drama production.

Writer Moon Yooseok (who has 25 years of writing experience) has literally done everything he can to get a queer story out there. Heck he’s even including stuff in the TDJ comic (spanking, anyone?) that wouldn’t fly on TV because he has more freedom there. 

Ji Sung and Jinyoung have known this from the start as well (that poster photoshoot), and it’s hard not to know that your character is gay when they’re staring at another for 95% of the show and undressing and oogling each other, or when the ending is 2 minutes of sappy staring. They knew. 

The director in episode 8′s bts at 6:04 as Jinyoung and Jisung rehearse Gaon ditching Min Jung Ho: “Gaon’s become cute now that Yohan’s here”. 

Jinyoung: nods.

Me: Okay we’re all in agreement clearly. 

Rather than new fans being disappointed for it not being gay enough, I hope they can uplift this for what it is: a serious attempt to bring a gorgeous romance onscreen. Writer Moon Yoo Seok really said lawful husbands. He’s been saying it from the beginning. 

#he really killed the only het character and said what more do you want #soohyun did deserve better though but that's another conversation #the devil judge #this needs to be said #ji sung #jinyoung #moon yooseok #tropes are a thing #kang yohan #kim gaon #yohan x gaon #gahan #lawful husbands