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thepersonnamedsam · 6 months

Text

she got this - op81

pairing: oscar piastri x academic!girlfriend

summary: oscar visits his girlfriends bachelor thesis defending

word count: 1.3k

face claim: phoebe bridgers

warnings: a swear word, some angst - mentions of a panic attack

note: this is for my baby @lissyontour, you got this, pls wish her good luck for today <3

oh and it’s my first oscar fic, hihi, enjoy it

and there is some of the bachelor thesis… i had to include some of it, thanks to chat gpt

masterlist / taglist

Fuck, was she nervous. Her head was spinning and her legs were jelly - no, scratch that - her legs were liquid.

Her eyes were trying to focus on something, just something that would help her back to reality. She knew she was somewhere else right now, somewhere where she shouldn’t be.

Why wasn’t Oscar with her? Why was she alone? This was not how she planned it!

Her heart was beating, she felt it nearly pop out of her chest. It almost hurt. Oscar should’ve been here with her, but a last minute meeting with Zak just threw her plans overboard.

Her breath quickend and her hands searched for the only safe thing she could think of, her phone. Her fingers quickly glided over the screen and Oscars answer made her hold her breath for a second.

Standing in front of the auditorium, the heavy red doors made her uneasy. It’s gonna be time soon.

Oscar had to hold himself back not to text her that he was actually sitting in the front row and waiting for her to enter the room. He knew it was cruel. But he just had to do it.

He was so much more nervous than her. He watched her write that bachelor thesis for over six months now. At every race she was sitting in his drivers room with at least ten books and her laptop. Only just for the last five laps she came out of the room to watch him race.

He appreciated her coming, she could’ve just stayed at home and studied, but she always came with. Multitasking her way through her studies. And he was so proud of her. There was no way he would miss her final step of the way.

And he knew his cruelty was all worth it, as she stepped into the room and her eyes spotted his. Her whole face lit up and he could almost spot some tears of relief.

„What are you doing here?“, she mouthed. A small smile on her lips. „Supporting you“, he mouthed back, matching her smile.

„Welcome Ms y/l/n!“, her professor welcomed her. „I am exited to hear you defend your bachelor thesis about; How Greek Mythology influenced modern literature.“

She smiled at her favourite teacher and took out her thesis. She closed her eyes for a second, breathed in and out again. She was ready. Oscar knew she studied English literature and oh did that make her sexy.

But he had no idea of Greek Mythology or modern literature by any means. Yes, he read her thesis at least twice, but did his brain understand anything she meant? It did not. Being the smart one was all her job.

„Welcome Professor McAllister, dear colleagues, guests and friends. I hereby welcome you dearly to my defending of my bachelor thesis: How Greek Mythology influenced modern literature.“

Oscar listened intently and always smiled when she looked at him for reassurance. His heart was swelling with proudness. He soon had a girlfriend with a bachelor degree.

„In the vast tapestry of literary evolution, Greek mythology stands as an enduring thread, weaving its timeless narratives into the very fabric of modern literature. As contemporary authors navigate the labyrinth of inspiration, they find themselves entwined with the rich tapestry of gods, heroes, and mythical creatures that originated in ancient Greece.

The resurgence of interest in Greek mythology can be traced to its profound impact on archetypal storytelling. From the lofty heights of Mount Olympus to the depths of the Underworld, these tales resonate with universal themes that transcend temporal and cultural boundaries. Authors draw from the exploits of Zeus, the sagas of heroes like Achilles, and the tragedies of figures like Oedipus to explore complex facets of human nature. The gods' capriciousness mirrors the unpredictable forces that shape our destinies, while the struggles of mortals against divine intervention echo the perennial human quest for agency in the face of cosmic uncertainty.

Prominent literary figures, from James Joyce to J.K. Rowling, have paid homage to Greek mythology, infusing their works with echoes of ancient narratives. The hero's journey, a concept rooted in the mythic structure of heroes like Perseus and Hercules, serves as a narrative template for protagonists in contemporary novels. These echoes are not mere nostalgic nods; they represent a perennial dialogue between past and present, a dialogue in which timeless themes find new expression.

Moreover, the enduring allure of Greek mythology lies in its malleability. Authors wield the myths as allegorical tools to explore issues ranging from power dynamics and hubris to the nuances of morality. The Hydra of Lerna becomes a metaphor for societal challenges that sprout anew when seemingly eradicated, and the labyrinthine trials of Theseus mirror the complexities of modern ethical dilemmas.

In essence, the enduring influence of Greek mythology on modern literature is a testament to the universality of its themes and the perennial resonance of its characters. As authors continue to delve into the wellspring of ancient tales, they discover not relics of a bygone era, but rather a living reservoir of inspiration that fuels the imagination of generations, perpetuating the eternal dance between the ancient and the contemporary.“

Her voice angelic as it could be, drew in people who never even heard of the topic. You didn’t have to be interested in Greek Mythology to listen to her thesis, because she delivered her speech that even Oscar understood and left him wanting to know more about it.

My god was he proud. He was in awe, his beautiful girlfriend standing up there, speaking about her passion and delivering it in a way he never thought she could.

Even the look on Professor McAllister made him proud. She looked at his girlfriend with a proud smile, nodding along with her and reassuring her. She was gonna ace this.

Oscar was snapped out of it when the whole auditorium clapped. She was standing with the biggest smile on that stage. Oscar just had to get a picture of her. His new wallpaper.

„Thank you, Ms y/l/n. This was magnificent! We‘ll just discuss real quick and we‘ll be back with your grade. You can be proud of yourself, Ms y/l/n“, Professor McAllister told the young woman on stage.

And as soon as they left the room, she squealed and ran to Oscar. He opened his arms and let the girl spring into his embrace. „Hi“, he whispered. „Hi“, she whispered back. „I thought you weren’t coming?“

He laughed, a real deep belly laugh. „I had to surprise you!“ She hit his shoulder and said: „I hate you, but I’m glad you came.“

„You did so well, my love. I am so proud of you! We have to celebrate afterwards, anything you want.“

The time together was cut short, when the door opened again and the four professors walked in again. „Ms y/l/n, please, have a seat“, her professor said and pointed to the chair sat in front of the four.

She nervously walked over to them and smiled at them. „No need to be nervous, you did well, you can be proud of yourself.“

They talked stuff Oscar didn’t understand. But when he saw a big smile form on her face, he knew she received the best grade she could’ve. Proud, that’s the only word that came to Oscar’s mind.

„I love the boys“, she told Oscar. He smiled up at her and said: „I know you do, but only I can celebrate with you today.“ She giggled and would’ve almost kicked her feet, if it weren’t for the others in the room.

Professor McAllister handed y/n her diploma and told her they’d see each other at official ceremony. After that, Oscar and his girlfriend almost sprinted out of the auditorium.

oscarpiastri

liked by yninsta, landonorris and 82‘729 others

oscarpiastri how did we get from that to this?

view all 22‘219 comments

yninsta the first one is NOT me, idk where you got this from

user1 weren’t we all at that point during our studies?

user2 yes, yes we were

yninsta glad i wasn’t alone…

oscarpiastri so it was you

yninsta oop-

landonorris congrats, y/n! when we gonna get a lecture about greek mythology from you?

yninsta any day you want

landonorris now?

oscarpiastri no, now she’s busy with me

landonorris ewww, my eyes are scarred, don’t ever come back to the mclaren garage

oscarpiastri i didn’t mean it that way

yninsta he did

landonorris you’re just kids

user3 we love an academic wag

user4 so proud of you, y/n!

mclaren congratulations, y/n, next podium is for you 🍾

yninsta thank you, admin

yninsta thank you, baby

oscarpiastri i am so proud of you, darling

loganseargant i cannot believe i have a friend with a bachelors degree…

yninsta better believe it, american boy

user4 do u even know what a bachelors degree is..?

user5 american slander, we love it

alex_albon we are all proud, y/n

user6 we really are

yninsta thank you all so much, i love you guys so much

georgerussel63 oh no, she’s getting sentimental, let’s stop here guys

°°°

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#f1 x reader #formula 1 #f1 #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x female reader #lando norris #logan sargeant #alex albon #george russel #oscar piastri instagram au #yuki tsunoda

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authorracheljoy · 4 years

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Constellation Asks Andromeda Aquarius Aries Cancer Cassiopeia Corvus Draco Gemini Hydra Libra Lyra Persei Pyxis Ursa Major Ursa Minor Apus Aquila Caelum Canis Major Canis Minor Crux Indus Leo Lupus Musca Orion Pavo Phoenix Puppis Virgo

Note: I think it’s pretty obvious, but I’ll only be talking about my current writing venture with The Hunters Saga for this ask :))

Andromeda - Describe your main characters

Toni is a snarky teen full of adrenaline and wit.

Henri is a rich bloodsucker with a whole lotta patience for snarky teens-!

Aquarius - Who’s your least favorite character to write?

Mmmmm probably Robert? Which is kinda weird ‘cause he’s the *SPOILER* (I’ll keep it spoiled for anyone who has yet to read my book-!) but I dunno! He’s just not a fun character to write and explore, despite being the *SPOILER*! Maybe it’s because I can’t work with ��older” characters quite as well but *shrug* I dunno!

Aries - Share a line that you’re proud of!

Uhhhh I can’t pick one right now sorry!! >.

Cancer - What’s the name of songs from the musical rendition of your project? (aka, have fun! come up with fun names)

W-what? Uhhhhhh

“Frying Pans for Days”

“Mark Me, Baby”

I could probably think of more but uhhhh NEXT ^^’

Cassiopeia - What’s your favorite scene so far?

Still the one where Toni hits Henri with a silver frying pan ^^ Heheh it’s so classic and I can’t believe I haven’t tried to commission an artist to draw that scene yet :O

Corvus - Who or what is the villain of the story?

Mmmm *SPOILER* (I think you know already though ;D)

Oh but if you mean for the series as a whole? ‘Cause there’s a lotta them in future books… mmmmm yeah! O_O

Draco - Who’s your favorite character to write?

Ooooh probably Gavin? ‘Cause he’s so fucking SADISTIC!

Gemini - What inspired you to write this project?

A dream! :O

Hydra - Tell us why you love your project.

I’ve been working/perfecting it since I was in high school, and it was my first attempt at actually WRITING something so! It’s my BABY

Libra - Which relationship dynamic do you enjoy writing the most?

Enemies to friends to lovers of course! *glances over at Henri and Toni*

Lyra - Give us a few songs that fit your project!

There are. SO MANY! (too many, in fact~)

Persei - What genre is this project in?

Paranormal romance and mystery(?)

Pyxis - Are there any major themes or messages you’re writing to show?

Ya know, if I had to sum up the theme that I’m aiming for (at least without giving spoilers) I’d say that I’d love for it to be about not judging anyone and listening to your heart before anything else. YES I KNOW that’s super cliche and it’s probably been done better than what I’m attempting but like… C’MON!

Ursa Major - What scene are you looking forward to writing?

Mmmm a lotta ones with a certain villain *eyes future scene*

Ursa Minor - What’s the setting?

New York City!

Apus - What’s the hardest part about writing for you?

Staying consistent and trying to balance my dialogue with action! ‘Cause GOD do I love dialogue more than action OR description! ^^’

Also, and this is more generalized I guess, but making the EFFORT to write! Putting aside the time to work on something can - for some reason - take a lot of convincing for me at times :X

Aquila - What do you do when you’re stuck in your writing?

I really just listen to music! But before that, I try and see if I can bang out a different scene; jump around a little, ya know? ;)

Caelum - Do you write outlines? Why or why not?

I do! Because it’s SUPER HELPFUL!

I mean, sometimes doing an outline can be difficult to stick to for me. If anything, an outline is just some detailed guidelines for the story I wanna tell!

Canis Major - Do you like writing character-driven stories or plot-driven stories?

I try to make my characters interesting enough for a character-driven story but if I’m being honest? Plot-driven stories are probably what I’m better at when it comes to ACTUALLY writing ^^’

Canis Minor - Share an excerpt of old writing and new writing to see how far you’ve come!

Heh, maybe later?? ^^

Crux - Villains or Heroes?

Ooooh VILLAINS!

Indus - Are there any characters or stories you miss writing? Tell us about them!

Oh, pretty much anyone from the later books of The Hunters Saga that I haven’t written for in what feels like FOREVER ^^’

Leo - Do you have a favorite place to write?

Either the computer room or my bedroom :)

Lupus - Have you abandoned other WIPs? Tell us about some and why you abandoned them?

Oh sure I have! Usually I only abandon a WIP when its ideas and themes are too similar to something else I’ve worked on? Which sucks but… *shrug* Also, some of my REALLY OLD stories had to be scrapped ‘cause they weren’t really what you’d consider stories? They were more like IDEAS so-

Musca - Do you like sharing your writing?

For sure! :D

Orion - Do you listen to music while writing?

Only while I’m editing! ^^ Otherwise, NO I LIKE MY SILENCE~

Pavo - Where do you get inspiration from?

Other writers and my DREAMS~

Phoenix - How do you develop your ideas?

By thinking them out, writing it all down in a notebook, then making an outline! ‘Course the outline might change when I actually develop the idea but-!

Puppis - Give us a piece of advice! (about anything)

For God’s sake WRITE DOWN YOUR IDEAS AS THEY COME! DON’T WAIT! YOU WON’T REMEMBER THEM LATER!! :X

Virgo - Describe your favorite tropes.

Uhhh forbidden love and enemies to lovers are probably my biggest draws :)

Thanks so much for the ask!

Constellation Asks

#Rachel Rambles #about me #writing asks #The Hunters Saga #my writing #writing #Friendo #peaceonwheels

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celestialprompts · 5 years

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"𝘝𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘵 𝘉𝘶𝘻𝘻𝘴𝘢𝘸" 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘴 — 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦.

𝘍𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐 𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭!

[ Content warning: a lot of swearing and frivolous art talk. mild sexual talk at some point.]

❝Lovely to see you again.❞ ❝Have you ever felt invisible?❞ ❝No, it's new. Vastly different themes.❞ ❝No originality. No courage. My opinion.❞ ❝I mean, you can feel the winds of the apocalypse.❞ ❝I think sober hasn't been good for him.❞ ❝I answer phones and get coffee. I'd literally be, like, the last to know.❞ ❝Its about choice, desire, sex. [chuckles] The whole enchilada.❞ ❝So much easier to talk about money than art.❞ ❝I swear to God, I want to hurt him.❞ ❝Maybe it will free you up for new things.❞ ❝He actually has some fantasy about us getting married.❞ ❝I'm through dating artists. They're already in a relationship.❞ ❝All this... it's just a safari to hunt the next new thing and eat it.❞ ❝I heard you were the one to watch out for.❞ ❝I've gone from anarchist to purveyor of good taste.❞ ❝Listen, my tolerance for your bullshit is zero.❞ ❝Okay, that was the worst show I've seen in years.❞ ❝Ever since that day, I find myself thinking all the time about you." ❝I make you hard, huh?❞ ❝You make me confused.❞ ❝Well, get inspired and come join me in the pool.❞ ❝Hang up, right? Yeah, rich people are impatient.❞ ❝Why, why why. Why anything?❞ ❝Oh, wait. In our world, you are God.❞ ❝I'm not kidding. A neighbor actually died. I found the body.❞ ❝Then you insult my intelligent mind.❞ ❝Love the jumper. Cornsilk's a great color for you.❞ ❝I don't know where I am with anything else in my life, other than that I feel good with you.❞ ❝Okay, well, you failed.❞ ❝Didn't you tell me you wanted a cat?❞ ❝Um... can we talk about it later?❞ ❝What the fuck is wrong with you?❞ ❝I'm not just a man of primitive skills.❞ ❝Hey you. I heard you were coming by.❞ ❝No. Not in our records, and we have everyone.❞ ❝I wanted to change the world through art.❞ ❝The wealthy vacuum up everything, except crumbs.❞ ❝The best work is enjoyed by a tiny few.❞ ❝Mmm. It's everywhere, the money question.❞ ❝I asses out of adoration. I further the realm I analyze.❞ ❝I'm going to have to ask you to leave.❞ ❝It's none of your business.❞ ❝Don't make me pull some sort of heavy interrogation.❞ ❝Right now, it's just you and me, with all our active friendship and love for each other.❞ ❝Now, how did you get all of these?❞ ❝Well, I won't bother with the obvious questions but, oh, you must have some giant plans.❞ ❝You're in way over your head, babe.❞ ❝I'm willing to do all of that for... a reasonable percentage.❞ ❝You can engage me in an endless lawsuit, or... you can become rich.❞ ❝Critique is so limiting and emotionally draining.❞ ❝An artist toiling in the recesses, discovered in death. I wanna start researching immediatly.❞ ❝In return I want exclusive rights to a book and several pieces.❞ ❝Okay, send it over. And wash your hands of it. And add a zero to your bill.❞ ❝Using his art to dive deep into his own psyche.❞ ❝The result is an epic saga of violence and madness.❞ ❝You know, he hasn't had, like, an original idea in his whole life.❞ ❝Well, you're the adviser. Advise.❞ ❝Didn't they teach any of this in art school?❞ ❝I can't stomach cheery or upbeat.❞ ❝Just give me an honest goddamn opinion about what you're looking at.❞ ❝Too many addiction triggers.❞ ❝Ideas come, but they kill themselves as soon as they appear.❞ ❝This is a slaughterhouse. Welcome aboard.❞ ❝This shit goes sideways, and I'm telling you straight up, I will say this was all your idea. I had nothing to do with it.❞ ❝Hey, I've got some great champagne in the fridge. Open it while we get ready.❞ ❝You're too young.❞ ❝The position requires someone with years of experience. Stop back when you're forty, eh?❞ ❝Come back to my office and tell me what else you heard.❞ ❝I'm saying you left him the fuck alone.❞ ❝That casket. What color is that? Smog Orange? Did he buy it on sale?❞ ❝Seriously, imagine having to spend an eternity in that.❞ ❝Jesus. Nothing is ever good enough for you.❞ ❝I absolutely despise being here for this.❞ ❝I wanna share with you a little somethin' somethin'.❞ ❝These are heinous.❞ ❝That is an outrageous request. Even coming from you.❞ ❝The admiration I had for your work has completely evaporated!❞ ❝I was never particularly obsessed.❞ ❝Seriosly, (name here), I am talking to you.❞ ❝It seems you have no one around you to say this. Stop it.❞ ❝Something truly goddamn strange is going on!❞ ❝You now what? It's been a fucked-up few weeks!❞ ❝All art is dangerous, (name here).❞ ❝Baby, that's raw silk.❞ ❝You've got strong hands.❞ ❝Why? We break up, and you write an article to completely destroy my livelihood.❞ ❝Are you aware that you've completely lose your mind?❞ ❝We don't realize the value of friends until they're gone.❞ ❝Go fuck yourself and lose my number!❞ ❝Jesus! What's the point of art if nobody sees it!❞ ❝What do you mean, good for him? What are you talking about?❞ ❝Everything? Every image, every drawing, every postcard, every piece of art?❞Lovely to see you again.❞ ❝Have you ever felt invisible?❞ ❝No, it's new. Vastly different themes.❞ ❝No originality. No courage. My opinion.❞ ❝I mean, you can feel the winds of the apocalypse.❞ ❝I think sober hasn't been good for him.❞ ❝I answer phones and get coffee. I'd literally be, like, the last to know.❞ ❝Its about choice, desire, sex. [chuckles] The whole enchilada.❞ ❝So much easier to talk about money than art.❞ ❝I swear to God, I want to hurt him.❞ ❝Maybe it will free you up for new things.❞ ❝He actually has some fantasy about us getting married.❞ ❝I'm through dating artists. They're already in a relationship.❞ ❝All this... it's just a safari to hunt the next new thing and eat it.❞ ❝I heard you were the one to watch out for.❞ ❝I've gone from anarchist to purveyor of good taste.❞ ❝Listen, my tolerance for your bullshit is zero.❞ ❝Okay, that was the worst show I've seen in years.❞ ❝Ever since that day, I find myself thinking all the time about you." ❝I make you hard, huh?❞ ❝You make me confused.❞ ❝Well, get inspired and come join me in the pool.❞ ❝Hang up, right? Yeah, rich people are impatient.❞ ❝Why, why why. Why anything?❞ ❝Oh, wait. In our world, you are God.❞ ❝I'm not kidding. A neighbor actually died. I found the body.❞ ❝Then you insult my intelligent mind.❞ ❝Love the jumper. Cornsilk's a great color for you.❞ ❝I don't know where I am with anything else in my life, other than that I feel good with you.❞ ❝Okay, well, you failed.❞ ❝Didn't you tell me you wanted a cat?❞

#prompts #dialogue prompts #roleplay prompts #roleplay ideas #celestialprompts #velvet buzzsaw

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artmotherhoodandmadness · 6 years

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Why I am compelled to visit the Rohingya refugee camps in Cox’s Bazar, Bangladesh

‘You are crazy to go,’ a friend said. Maybe I am? Tomorrow I fly to Bangladesh and then to Cox’s Bazar. It will be a forty-five minute drive to the Rohingya camps with Action Aid. I have never been to a refugee camp, the only images I have seen are the ones in newspapers or online. When I examine the faces of the Rohingya, they look like fellow Bangladeshis, but they are not, they are a distinct ethnic group and their home is Myanmar. It is a noble deed on behalf of Bangladesh - one of the poorest countries in the world - to have accepted nearly one million refugees when no one else would. And at some point they will need to be repatriated, but when?

Drawing of Rohingya refugees, pen and ink on paper, 2017

Why am I going? It’s a good question because actually I’m starting to feel nervous about the whole trip. I can say that I have observed many wars and conflicts around the world over the years. The first time I responded visually to warfare as an artist was when the Bosnian war broke out. Now war is a theme in my work, a powerful way of protesting. The biggest battles I face are in my head, I feel I’m at war each day fighting to survive, the pain never seems to leave. And I’m always trying to escape through art, through words, through creation, and even reckless behaviour.

My cousin first alerted me to the Rohingya crisis several years ago before it was national news. I began to follow the unfolding story collecting images and reinterpreting them in my art. The crisis resonated because the Rohingya were a persecuted people, not wanted in Burma or in Bangladesh. They didn’t have a place to call home. Their future is uncertain, and they are in limbo. I feel a certain disconnection with Britain right now; especially post Brexit and the Windrush saga. And even though my parents are Bangladeshi, I am still seen as a bideshi (foreigner) when I return. So, I am currently living a nomadic existence going back and forth between Europe and Asia, rootless and drifting it seems from place to place.

The impending monsoon rains threaten to destroy makeshift temporary homes and potentially kill. 48, 000 women are about to give birth to babies some conceived as the result of rape or sexual violence at the hands of the Myanmar armed forces. Reading this statistic was a turning point; I couldn’t just sit and read the headlines I decided I had to go. In 2015 I launched my Mental Health for All campaign, and the importance of maternal mental health especially for women in the developing world. Many of these women and girls have lost everything and now they were going to give birth in perilous conditions. And I am assuming they don’t have proper access to maternal mental health care. I can’t profess to have any answers or even imagine I could help ameliorate their suffering. But I know how to take photos, to film, to draw. I want to hear their stories and listen, not from a journalist’s perspective but as an artist. My own mental health is fragile I don’t know if I am strong enough to embark on this trip, but I will be guided by Action Aid and working primarily with women and girls. I have been forewarned that some of the women are very religious and conservative and might not be forthcoming. I am hoping to depict portraits of the women that show another side of their story and go beyond the surface. Just being there, meeting and interacting with the women face-to-face is important.

My last memories of Cox’s Bazar were as a small child of aged six or seven. I recall a white sandy beach, the sea that stretched for miles and the shells I collected. It was the one rare moment in my life that I felt I had found a place to call home where I belonged. Now Cox’s Bazar is transformed, a temporary home for a people displaced, a people with a future that is uncertain, living in conditions that are precarious.

Whatever problems I may think I have, however hard I feel life gets, if these people have the will power to keep going, to continue to try, and simply survive then surely I can, too.

This will be the most important project in my artistic career, challenging and arduous and probably life changing. Currently it seems that war and conflict rages in too many countries - with war comes displacement and the influx of refugees. There is an intolerance in Europe, a fatigue, they don't want anymore, can’t take anymore - but that doesn’t mean we can turn a blind eye, they are still human beings. Yet every life is precious, isn’t it?

#rohingya #refugees

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terkaznebes · 5 years

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2019 - the year of the Shrimp

Now that time is drawing near, I have decided to compile my thoughts on pregnancy. What I really don’t understand is that how come making babies is so much fun but pregnancy is such a drag? Talk about being played by nature. I found out I was pregnant at the beginning of July and few weeks later I had a beautiful photo of my uterus to prove it. Of course we wanted a baby, we just didn’t expect it would happen right away and when I travelled back home after year and a half of being away, there was a party or two, a wedding and a few gin and tonics. What can I say? At my first hospital appointment the midwife asked and straight away answered: “How many alcoholic beverages have you had since pregnant, none?” Haha.

I found out in Prague after a beautiful trip with my friends, I messaged in the group asking if everyone is feeling a “bit weird” after the lunch we had yesterday. No? Just me then? Confirmed with a big plus on a pregnancy test. Soon after I had every symptom in the book of “what to expect when expecting”, that’s the kind of good quality literature we have in the household now. It has a super healthy and happy expectant mother on the cover. I had the worst nausea, I couldn’t eat what I normally eat and I haven’t pooped in days. Except for that one time when I had an emergency when walking our family dog in the forest. I only managed to tie her to a branch and the whole time she was giving me judgemental looks. It’s not like she is the biggest lady when it comes to it. The rest of the time in Czech Republic was spent in haze, half sleeping only summoning enough energy to teach my yoga classes.

The flight to the Gold Coast was possibly one of the worst ones yet and I was so grateful for my packed lunch because airplane food is normally disgusting, but airplane food in your first trimester is hell. I had a never ending jet lag that felt like depression. Did you ever cry watching How I met your mother? The all knowing literature said this all goes away with the first trimester so at this time more often then not, I caught myself thinking: “Yeah if you could just go ahead and grow from a blueberry to a king prawn that would be great.”

And away it went - thank god. I started teaching and practicing yoga as much as I could and I really feel like it was a very harmonic time in my life. I had way to much time on my hands, so I started painting, I decorated the nursery beautifully, I made homemade granola probably for everyone we know. It’s definitely not ideal becoming pregnant when you are unemployed because turns out, it’s not really easy finding a job in the first trimester when you feel like throwing up all day and not easier still when it’s visible that you probably won’t stay in the job for very long. And yes, it was fantastic being a yoga teacher, but as a person who is used to being busy and knows that rest is only great when well deserved, this was not ideal. Even still, even thought I am complaining now, I will be returning in thoughts to this time of my life as a very peaceful time. When I was painting the bunting in the next room and listening to Lukas working away in the other and thinking how happy we are, how harmonic our life is and how fantastic it is just to think about healthy food, our balcony garden, sustainable household and just really understanding the meaning of “life is a beach” not “bitch”.

At seven months, I had to stop teaching yoga and stop practicing at eight and now in the ninth month, I was told I shouldn’t even swim. Hopeless. I think the reason I have only gained 10kg is because my muscle turned to fat and everyone knows fat is lighter than muscle.

To be fair ever since doing nothing, my pains have subsided. I had a horrible back and ribcage pain, which I thought was unbearable until the bruised/torn belly muscle showed up. I barely ever go to a doctor unless I absolutely have to, but when I do, I make sure it’s something super serious like a bruised muscle. This is the second time it has happened along with that bruised intercostal muscle back in March last year. I started laughing when the obstetrician told me, so I explained what’s funny and he said: Everything is serious when you are 36 weeks pregnant. So sweet!

Ever since my sporting activities were banned, my friend Lucy suggested I should start knitting and damn I enjoy knitting. My former colleague Dean started calling me grandma and asked if I ever heard of Nintendo :D So for the last two weeks you can almost exclusively find me in my baby feeding chair watching Homeland and knitting. I guess I sound really boring to some, I even bore myself to be honest. I know one day though, I will think I wish I could just sit and knit and be completely at peace.

Now before I move onto another episode of Homeland (highly recommend this TV show btw), let me just tell you about my birthday and baby shower weekend. I haven’t celebrated much in the last two years, even though I still got special surprises from Luky. That’s why this year, before becoming a mom (geez sounds serious), I really wanted to have a party just celebrating me. Luky went away around 5AM on the day of my birthday and I didn’t pick him up at the airport until 8PM that evening. So I really didn’t expect him to plan anything given how busy he has been lately. But guess what? He still keeps stepping up his game as the best events manager and boyfriend in the world. Once we got home he suggested a walk on the beach where there was the most beautiful set up with blankets, pillows, strawberries, heart shaped cake, fairy lights, candles and champagne on ice with glasses. We cuddled and watched the stars and the moon until late night. So cheesy, so corny so unbelievably amazing. I will tell you more about this night soon.

The baby shower next day was supposed to be a casual BBQ, but when I have put all the things needed into one pile, it was more than 4 trips to the car and it started pouring down rain just as we were headed to the venue on the grass under the trees overlooking the sea. We had to find a last minute location but it still worked out anyway. And it was a great afternoon, my friend Eva bringing all the blankets and pillows, helping me out with the food, Lisa organised the most amazing cake and baby games and Luky surprised me with more flowers and a handwritten letter from my family. My Czech Friends gave me a yoga bolster that I have wanted for so long and everyone else brought beautiful baby presents and one Champagne bottle for later. Also from Lisa, Saga and Joel I got a bracelet with the Tree of Life and Saga singing hip hip hooray just made my morning. I was so touched, so emotional and grateful for everyone in my life, for all the effort that everyone has made, for all the flowers, just for everything, I felt like I can’t even deserve it. I couldn’t fall asleep until early morning hours because I just kept thinking. I must have been born under a lucky star.

My yogi friends

The night of my birthday <3

The beautiful present

Cake time!

The set up on our beach with GC lights in the background.

My project!

All the flowers.

Baby shower cake <3

All the amazing people.

My favourite kids. Kids can be cool too you know! :D

Kate and Maria <3

And the playground gang.

#pregnancy #birthday #love

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aviewfromtheclouds25 · 7 years

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1)Hi! Do you believe that Robert can develop feelings for Rebecca? Yes, Robert was ready to die with Aaron in that car. But then Rebecca turned up and everything had changed. We are clinging to the idea that Robert is terrified to lose Aaron. But what proof do we get? Yes, he keeps telling Rebecca that Aaron is the only one but he used to tell Aaron during the affair that it was not a love story and Aaron was nothing. Can we trust Robert`s words?

2) I mean words vs actions. We were sure that he would never sleep with Rebecca but he did. Now we are trying to convince ourselves that Aaron is the only one for Robert. You know I am ready to believe that those spoilers are true. I`m afraid this is the route they are going to take. And Robert will be torn between Aaron and Rebecca and he will “choose” Aaron because it will turn out that Rebecca is not pregnant or the child is not his like he “chose” Aaron because Chrissie didn`t take him back.

Hi, anon! Well this is an interesting question which I hadn’t anticipated finding in my inbox today haha, so this may well turn into an incoherent ramble, for which I apologise profusely! While I understand and respect why you may feel this way, anon, I have to admit my views are somewhat different. This is just my own opinion, of course. But do I believe Robert can develop feelings for Rebecca?

In short: No.

There is a long answer, of course, but I’m afraid it’s probably going to get very long haha. Here it is…

Do I believe Robert has ever had feelings for Rebecca? Yes. Do I believe he still cares / cared for her? Yes. I think he admired and respected her, saw aspects of himself in her - the parts he always took pride in, and genuinely did see her as a friend. Do I believe he’s going to develop feelings for her, of the romantic kind, or is still harbouring any? No. And this isn’t me seeing the show through Robron-coloured spectacles, unable to believe that Robert could ever have had feelings for anyone other than Aaron. I fully acknowledge that there were people before Aaron, people Robert loved. I’ve always watched Emmerdale, I saw the whole Robert/Katie saga, and his love for her. But do I believe Robert when he says, “No one else comes close.”? 100%. Robron have been referred to as soulmates so often that I kind of feel like that word doesn’t always do justice to the depth of their connection and loses some of its impact in a way, but I genuinely believe they are the loves of each other’s life. (In fact, ironically, I wrote a post on this “soulmate” status and its relevance to this storyline specifically earlier, before I read this message. But it might give more of an insight into my views on this matter.) And while I agree that words vs actions is often a relevant topic of discussion, regarding the way Robert’s barriers prevent his intent showing on the surface and allow him to fall back on his safety net of words and manipulation, I do not think this is - or has ever been - the case in regard to his love for Aaron. As far as I’m concerned, that’s been all action.

The car! I’m so pleased you mentioned the car. I have to confess I feel like the significance of that moment is so underestimated and overlooked sometimes; Robert would rather have died with Aaron, than live a life without him. His life literally has no meaning without him. Do I think that’s suddenly changed? Absolutely not. (Also, can I just acknowledge Robert going back for Lachlan? Because that wasn’t for himself, that was for Aaron. Because he didn’t just want to save Aaron, he wanted to make sure Aaron’s life was worth living, too.) The one aspect that has been overwhelmingly clear throughout the whole of this narrative is that Robert and Aaron cannot live without each other. This moment in the car, the proposal, the house, the wedding - this all came after Rebecca had already arrived in the village. Her presence didn’t change anything. I don’t think we’re clinging to the idea that Robert is terrified of losing Aaron; these are the facts that are being presented to us. Everything - every word and action - is screaming that losing Aaron is Robert’s worst nightmare. Robert told Aaron theirs wasn’t a love story on his wedding day to Chrissie because he wasn’t yet ready to give up on the life he thought he wanted, the life he thought he was supposed to have. He was, like he frequently is, manipulating himself with his own words. He already knew he was falling in love with Aaron, but he couldn’t accept that then. And as far as I recall, the only times Robert ever told Aaron he was nothing was when Aaron had rejected him. Robert Sugden doesn’t deal well with rejection, as we all know. But Rebecca hasn’t rejected him. Not once. But Robert has repeatedly told her the only person he wants and loves is Aaron. I don’t want to draw loads of comparisons between his relationship with Aaron and his relationship with Chrissie, because there really is no comparison, but I will just make a couple of points:

1) When Robert rejected Aaron, it was all about Aaron. He was nothing. He wasn’t worth it. But when Robert has rejected Rebecca? It’s still all about Aaron. He didn’t tell her all of her faults. He didn’t give her a list of reasons why he doesn’t want her. He didn’t reject her because he was hurt and defensive. He rejected her out of loyalty to the man that he loves. He rejected her because he only wants one person, and she’s not him.

2) The Incident. I feel I should point out I have always been, and remain, a firm believer in The Theory that it never actually happened. And that the baby is definitely not Robert’s. But I’ll push all of that aside for the moment, to say this: Robert’s actions now are the proof that he’s terrified of losing Aaron. Let’s just say that the ONS did happen - it was one night where he was drunk, broken and thought his marriage was over. Compare that to the roughly 8 months in which he purposely pursued the man he was falling in love with behind Chrissie’s back. What we’re seeing now is not what we saw then. When Robert went back to the Mill, he could barely even touch the bedding because he was so wracked with guilt and sickened by himself, by what he’d done. But when he spent a full week with Aaron in his marital bed? He had no qualms about taking those sheets and throwing them in the wash. And let’s not forget, the factor enabling Robron to have that week at Home Farm was Robert encouraging Chrissie to go on holiday - not to cover up his secret, but to be with Aaron. But this time, after the ONS? He takes Aaron away. He has no interest in Rebecca, let alone being with her. He just wants to save his marriage and his reason for living. He is literally falling apart at the seams trying to keep hold of Aaron. That’s all the proof I need.

3) I have to disagree that Robert chose Aaron because Chrissie wouldn’t take him back. For me, his fighting for Chrissie was him fighting for himself. The man he’d tried so desperately hard to be. The man his father could be proud of. It was never about Chrissie at all. It was about Robert struggling to accept himself, something only Aaron was able to help him to do. For me, Robert “chose” Aaron the moment he pursued him. The moment he didn’t stop pursuing him. The moment he told him he loved him. From the very first moment Robert let Aaron in, he had chosen. Because Robert doesn’t let anyone in. But when it came to Aaron? Frankly, he never had a choice at all.

And there isn’t a choice now, either. I could list a whole load of Robert’s actions which demonstrate his love and commitment to Aaron - not the big romantic gestures - including the way he supported Aaron through one of the toughest times of his life, the fact that he went back for the ring - okay, that is kind of a big romantic gesture, but that ring holds such meaning. That ring perfectly symbolises Robron and their relationship; it’s weathered and battered after having been through so much, but it’s resilient, unbreakable, and worth saving. There are so many ways he shows his love for Aaron. His words are for Rebecca’s benefit, no one else’s. Because the one time she got to see for herself Robert’s love for Aaron manifest in his actions? She found him drunk, upset, and broken, slumped on the floor of the home he’d destroyed, a mere shell of the man she wanted. But still, she only listened to his words.

I feel like I’ve barely scratched the surface here but like I’ve also rambled at you forever, sorry haha! I know it’s hard, anon, but personally I’m not worried at all. I cannot see this particular scenario playing out, it would make no sense from ED’s perspective. At this stage, this really is all just wild speculation. Even official spoilers can be misleading. If there is any semblance of truth to this speculation of Robert being “torn”, I have a few theories on how this could play out - but none of these involve a romantic attachment between Robert and Rebecca. As it is just wild speculation for the moment, I’m reserving judgement on these until I see the actual spoilers. But even then, remember how often things play out completely differently onscreen. And, as much as the bumpy road analogy has been exhausted, remember we have been told that Robron will make it through - whatever’s coming their way. And personally, I expect that to happen sooner rather than later.

#Robron speculation #apologies this really did turn into quite the tangent #and I'm not even sure it was relevant to your question haha

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nyquiloid · 3 years

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THE (IN)COMPLETE ACCURSED SAGA OF FRANK KNOWBODIE & FRIENDS LORE (2021) ft. childhoodfriends both beloved and [REDACTED] AKA my surface pen broke so now you have to listen to me talk about cursed creations from 10 years ago (sheesh)

I was at the tender age of 7 (probably), my elementary school class was lined up in the hallway for a bathroom break. A teacher asked who was still left in the bathroom, and many children responded “Nobody”. There, at that moment, a (less than) brilliant idea formed in my head, I would create a personification of Nobody. I was already familiar with imaginary friends, so this was not new for me. A friend caught on and the name Frank Nobody was coined, then later it was altered to Frank Knowbodie. At the time it was an innocent creation, a mere childhood skit, it had no idea what I had started, but it was too late, the fire was ignited and there was no turning back.

The first year or so of Frank’s creation were slow, an imaginary friend to laugh and joke about occasionally, but as I grew older, the layers would pile.

SECTION A: A Homeland and its inhabitants

Frank’s story begins in a territory called “No Mexico” in a city called “Knowwhere”. No Mexico is located between the border of New Mexico and Arizona, and is only visible to the citizens and certain people who just happen to be allowed to see it (and subsequently all of its citizens and creatures). As No Mexico is not widely visible, neither are its citizens and creatures, again only certain people are born with the ability to see them.

Frank and his family were all born and raised in No Mexico, on a Ranch/Farm. They were one of the largest producers of Moosicorn Milk. I Don't want to have to explain what moosicorns are. Theres really not much else there, they lived on a Moosicorn ranch.

When Frank was around 9 years old (presumably) his parents moved to our city in Florida. The reason why was never explicitly stated or explained, and to this day I still don't know ( and IM the motherfucker that created this).

SECTION B: Frank’s Personality & Physical Traits

Frank was a dweeby kid who was prone to getting violently bullied by both my friends and I AND the other kids in my class no shit.

Frank was slightly shy, but one you got to know him he was energetic and in some people’s words “annoying”, but it didn’t stop him from his hobbies/interests. He liked climbing trees, and he liked animals. He would frequently get injured via both of these things.

He was a tall and lanky kid, (canonically he’s a few years older than us), he had a farmer’s tan and dark brown hair ( in my mind he was always Mexican, but my [REDACTED] Co-contributor at the time imagined him as white, but IM the one who created him so I get to say what he is and he’s CANONICALLY MEXICAN)

His favorite color was a sort of faded periwinkle blue. He also had a liking to rainbow/holographic colored things because that was the color of moosicorn milk, and it reminded him of home.

SECTION C: His Family

Frank had four sisters and one (or two?) brother (allegedly? I don't remember most of them)

He had an older sister (name forgotten/unknown) She was married with a daughter (names unknown) aka Frank’s niece.

His other older sister was named Carrie (I think??) At the time of creation she was attending a local Highschool.

His third older sister (name also forgotten) Who was four (?) years older than us, and attended our PK-8 school.

His fourth sister was a year younger than us and three years younger than frank. (I think her name was Molly or Maria, but I might be wrong) she was the most prominent sibling. She was more charismatic than Frank, and was allegedly popular in her grade, she was almost the polar opposite of Frank. She had a cat named Luna.

He had a baby brother who was named John. Not much there.

I think there was mentions of an older brother in between Carrie and the oldest, but most likely only mentioned once.

His parents were named Bob and Melinda (?) and they were, (allegedly) very rich via less-than-legal activity. Maybe this is why they moved to Florida?

SECTION D: His Pets

Frank Knowbodie had a beloved childhood pet “dog” named Porky.

Porky was a rather chubby looking thing brown with black spots, and had a fucked up face, making him look like a strange pig.

Frank would bring Porky to school, which he could do only because the teachers couldn’t see him or his dog. One day, Porky got through a fence at school and was flattened by a car, RIP. Fortunately, before Porky’s death, a neighbor of the Knowbodie’s had an equally pig like dog, which had puppies with Porky. this family allowed Frank to claim one of the pup’s which he named Piggy.

Frank’s family also had several cats that they took in. Most belonged to Molly(?). The names were Stella, Luna, Orion, Starry, and Sunny. As you can see there was a theme.

There was also the fact that the Knowbodies brought some of their prize moosicorn’s with them, though I'm not sure if you could call that a pet?

SECTION E: CULTURAL IMPACT 1 “Just beginning”

When Frank was 12 and we were 10, he was growing in popularity. He was a strange inconceivable entity to most, a concept at best. To my friends and I, he was very real.

We would do our best to convince everyone that he was really there standing next to us. Eventually a surprising large amount of classmates caught on, albeit to bully/tease the ever-loving hell out of him, but at least they acknowledged him. This grew to the point that our beloved 5th grade teacher let us put a nametag for Frank on an empty desk in the back. Things were just beginning.

SECTION F: Sara

Originally I was going to save this section for an entirely different post but hey while we’re at it.

Sara’s lore reached even further than Frank’s. I would typically say Sara originated when I was 6 years old, but the reality is even further back.

At the age of 4, an illiterate child, I used to draw little “comics” about a spy named Sara and her partner Flower. So at the age of 6, Sara, ex-child spy, became my imaginary friend. Sara was eccentric and hyper. She enjoyed sewing as many pockets on to her clothes as possible. When she got older, she dyed her hair so much, people didn’t know what the original color was (it was dark brown).

Eventually I “brought her back” when Frank began to pick up steam. Sara was mad jealous of Frank, because he was stealing my attention as a friend. She would lash out to him at first, but over time, she began to like him. She eventually apologized for her previous actions and became one of his closest friends.

Frank allegedly had a little bit of a crush on Sara, but it would be revealed later that Sara was not even into boys.

So there, Sara No-name, ex-child spy lesbian who enjoyed sewing and committing crimes. To be honest I don't have much of an emotional connection to Sara as I do with Frank, even if she existed long before.

(I am also going to mention another “imaginary” character named Crystal, she was the imaginary friend of one of my longtime best friends. I don't know her backstory and don’t really have the authority to mention much else besides the fact that she was another frequent character of our made up plot)

SECTION G: The comics “ a snippet”

This part will have an entirely different post dedicated to it, there are as many layers to the lore of the comics are there are to Frank’s story. I will try to be as brief as possible.

At the ages of 9 to11, I started to draw little mini comics on Index cards. They would be about little caricatures of my friends and I, and other little characters we made up. The line between these comic stories and reality often blurred when we were playing around. Frank was never explicitly depicted in the comics, but only because (by technical terms) he was unable to be perceived by most. Drawing him would give away a bit of the mystery and fun of it. Unfortunately any mention of him in the comics is lost to time, as most of the physical comic cards were destroyed or lost in the incident of 2018.

There were hundreds of these little cards, and he was included (by mention or crudely drawn shapes to allude to his form) in roughly 10 of them maybe?

SECTION H: CULTURAL IMPACT 2

I was 11-12, at the peak of Frank Knowbodie fame and impact, I was very active online. Forums, blogs, YouTube, you name it. It was time to make Frank Knowbodie an internet persona.

Tumblr account, a Roblox account, multiple emails, A twitter, a YouTube channel, A Google Plus (RIP) were all created and dedicated to Frank. Most of these are now defunct, save for maybe the Roblox and emails.

I remember I would post on these accounts playing as Frank. If you used to follow my original tumblr you might remember a few of my posts. I remember going on Omegle and trying to get people to follow the Frank Knowbodie accounts and understand the stories. Most of these attempts fell through unfortunately (or fortunately) and the content is lost to time.

Section I: The Disney World Incident

There were so many different little skits and situations we placed Frank & his companions in, I couldn't possible list them all, so I will mention one of the most prominent.

In 6th grade, [REDACTED] asked a beloved friend and I to Disney world for a birthday gift, which we agreed and happily went along, with Frank trailing along as usual.

Then... the incident. We were on splash mountain and forgot Frank on the ride. The thing was, he couldn’t ask to get out, as no one could see him. He was stuck on in infinite loop on the ride, for One Whole Year. He ate popcorn and snacks that others (that could see him) threw at him. That was the extent of it, and eventually he made his was off, and entered 7th grade with us.

Section J: 7th grade, and Carter “a snippet”

7th grade is seen as a turning point for me and all of my friends at the time. My personal friend group turned from a trio to a quintet (kind of) to a duo and sometimes a trio again. Middle school drama caused a lot of divides, both willing and unwillingly, some of my friends and I grew apart in the years following 6th grade. But not to get too ahead of myself.

[REDACTED] and I changed a great deal in the summer following 6th grade. I still lugged around my giant sketchbook with loads of comics and doodles when we returned in August. She on the other hand was... different, it was probably for the best, as her “true self” was revealed more and more. What does this have to do with Frank? Well she was the largest contributor to his story behind me, she started to reject our “childish” skits and games. It broke my heart a little, because I loved my stories, and I (we) were still 12, I didn’t want to grow up and stop making that kind of stuff.

I remember one conversation, when another classmate mentioned/asked Frank, and she seemed very embarrassed and judgmental, as she nervously laughed and quickly made an impromptu joking story along the lines of “Oh, haha yeah he got expelled!” or something. She brushed it off so she wouldn’t have to face her past embarrassments while giving me a sideways glace. She was too good for it then, there was no creative fire to her story, she had a tone of voice, and look on her face that reminded me of all of my older cousins who judged and cringed at me for acting like a kid.

So... Carter... Well in 7th grade, another beloved friend of mine had a faulty iPad. When she would tap or try to interact with it, it would let out a terrifying high-pitched shrill. So being an edgy little fuck, and also a 12 year old who loved storytelling, my friends and I called this phenomenon “Carter”. Carter was a tech-demon, who inhabited (mostly modern) technology and haunted people via the internet.

Originally Carter’s appearance was a grey-skinned demon, with red eyes and “glitchy” wings. A pretty basic appearance for any preteen OC design.

Later though, my older sister helped me tweak his design, he was primarily blue themed, no wings, but he had a tail with a more sci-fi ‘vibe’.

Carter’s backstory changed over the years, but the general consensus was that he died via some sort of technology/internet related incident in the late 90s-early 2000s . He was stuck between the human and demon world, cursed to roam eternity alone, and not visible to humans. He would go on to spook people through their devices for sport, until he traveled to my friend’s iPad, and met Frank& Friends. Frank & his family/friends are able to see him, because of some ancient deal between demons and the ancestors of the No Mexico citizens (It’s a stretch I KNOW, but all of this is pretty far fetched, and again, I was 12). Carter becomes close friends with Frank, and was very appreciative of him because he is the first person in years to show him kindness. At the time, I was a spiteful closeted kid, and I knew making Frank canonically have a crush on Carter would piss off [REDACTED], as I had suspicions that she was homophobic. (Spoiler, she was very subtlety homophobic in 8th grade and later in highschool it was kind of confirmed that she was)

At the time I was first dipping into what would later develop into my current drawing style, and I loved to draw Carter and Frank.

However, these drawings, and Carter’s creation, was a silent signal to the closing of Frank’s story, and my childhood as I knew it.

SECTION K: The End of An Era, and the Impact of One Beloved Childhood Character.

After 7th grade, my life got increasingly complicated. Friends moved on, I started to create new stories, my old comics collected dust under my bed, and Frank became a sweet memory of happier times.

I had to move on (reluctantly), and “face reality” according to most people around me. Years past, I started highschool, and forced myself to grow up, giving up my “childish tendencies”. I doodled Frank maybe twice since I was 12, but never really looked back until now. I think at first Frank was a joke of course, but as I developed his story, he was more of a projection of my complex 11 year old thoughts and feelings.

There was a time at 14 where I avoided mentioning him, I became what I hated, I was just like [REDACTED], I hated my younger self for acting like a kid and doing what made me happy. I threw away mass amounts of comics and trinkets I made, I was terrified of being seen as a awkward kid. I regret it now, I know know I was a young kid who was hurting so deeply from growing up, who was so scared of it. It was such a silly thing too, to hate myself for something so simple.

I owe so much to Frank in a way. Him and his story paved a way for me today, to make my current stories and characters, more complex of course, but I still owe it all. I don't deny myself anymore, he taught me over the years that I don’t have to hide my true self, from [REDACTED] or anyone else. As I enter senior year soon, I am so grateful for my past and the fun I has while it lasted. Its like that one stupid saying, although it’s a joke, there is a funny little truth to it. “Don’t kill the part of you that is cringe, kill the part of you that cringes.”

#rant #childhood #i honestly don't know what to call this #childhood friends #i guess #before anyone mentions it yes i am mlm and mexican lol #i'll add pictures later #my silly little stories #10 year old nyquil would be proud #childhood oc #hello irls #i missed a lot #childhood coping #middle school memories #nobody cares but me but idc

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