#Fara Rants

[faranae]

Rant incoming

I love when I talk about my own identity and what I settled on after years of uncertainty and insecurity only to have internet randos constantly yelling about not forcing identities onto folks who don't want them. That's some boogeyman shit.

I... Didn't? Like, it should be a given from any decent human being that I'm not sitting here forcing my identity onto others just by claiming it myself. That's not how it works. That's not how any of this works, actually, and it's the same logic the bigots and TERFs use if you take more than 10 seconds to think about it.

If Susan says she identifies as a butch lesbian, she is not calling for all of lesbian-kind to adopt butchdom. Maxille calls themselves the King Fruit? Surprisingly not a crusade to force that title on others, though an uprising or two may be due because I don't remember voting for them.

If I say I identify as queer and ask folks to respect that, I am not saying "everyone in the LGBTQ2S+ communities needs to accept being called queer" because that would be fucking stupid.

I am, quite literally, begging here: Leave queer folks alone. You don't have to use our umbrella. We are not threatening you by fighting for our right to just stand here, holy fuck.

We are allowed to point out literal campaigns designed to vilify us. We are allowed to point out that we reclaimed queer decades ago and that there are groups fighting--recently!--to undo that. We are allowed to draw attention to the hitlists and harassment, even if you don't want to see it.

We are not forcing you to listen, but a modicum of respect would be nice. If you can't stomach treating a queer person like a human being with feelings, perhaps you can manage the bare minimum and just leave us the fuck alone in our own spaces.

And on that note: Maybe, just maybe, you can block and move on if one of our posts breaches containment and hits your feed instead of jumping in and shitting on everyone just trying to connect with their peers and find a sense of belonging.

I am so tired.

/endrant

#queer pride #fara speaks #fara rants #content warning #Queer mention #I even tag it for folks who filter it #What do you want from me

[woso-dreamzzz]

Treat You Better IV

Laia Codina x Reader

Summary: The Conti Cup

“Keep winning the- Y/n!”

Lessi flinches as you dump ice cold champagne down her back before spraying it in Vic’s face.

You laugh and so does Alex. You wiggle your way between Fara and Lessi as Alex calls for you before you leave.

“Good game, y/n,” Alex says and you grin at her.

“Great game. Love winning some silverware at the end of it.”

You’re on such a high as you hold the now empty champagne bottle in your hand.

“Obviously, Victoria and Alessia were saying about how much the match meant to the club and the fans but you had an absolute stunner of a game. You picked out Foord, who picked out Blackstenius. Tell us about it.”

You shrug. “Yeah, I don’t know what to tell you. I was running, I felt the defender at my back and passed to Foordy. She deserves all the credit for getting it to Stina and Stina, of course, for winning us the match. There’s not much to mention. The Conti Cup’s back where it belongs.”

Alex laughs. “Would winning be your favourite moment then?”

You shake your head. “Nah, it was seeing Laia running around in one of my spare boots.”

That shocks a laugh out of Fara too. “It was your boot?”

“Yeah. I always bring spares in case my sole breaks. Just lucky that we’re the same size.”

“And it looks like Codina’s waiting for you now. I’ll let you go, y/n.”

You wave goodbye and immediately crash into Laia. She laughs as her arms wrap around you, leading you back to the rest of your teammates. You lean into her easily. You know that tomorrow, you’ll be achy but you don’t care right now. You’re pumped up on adrenaline and high on life and the sweet smell of Laia’s perfume.

“Winning looks good on you,” You say to Laia,” No matter how many times you you do it.”

She grins at you, a soppy, puppylike smile that has you cradling her cheeks softly.

“I think I prefer winning with you then with anyone else.”

You grin right back at her, winking. “Obviously the Conti Cup is far superior to the World Cup.”

She laughs. “That’s right! It is!”

Laia looks the most pretty when she’s smiling, you think. You can spend hours just watching her smile. It didn’t matter where. She was stunning even when she ranted about her farm back home and her cows.

You make your way back to the others, weaselling your way closer to Caitlin and Katie. As expected, Katie’s found an Irish flag from somewhere. It’s draped over her shoulders as the cup is passed around.

She flings one right at you and you knot it around you like a cape too. Laia reaches out to adjust it and you peak down at her mismatched shoes.

“They’re comfy, right?”

She rolls her eyes. “Yes, they are. I might take them back to Spain with me.”

“Oh, yeah? If you’re taking my shoes, can I take yours?”

She pretends to think for a moment before teasing,” I suppose you can. If you score then it’s like I scored, right?”

“I’ll dedicate my next goal to you then, luv.”

The crowd is roaring and there’s still adrenaline in your veins so you lean closer and kiss her. Your relationship wasn’t a secret, not really. Not if people really looked. You had no issues with kissing Laia in public.

Everything was perfect. You would be returning to North London in red with the almighty Conti Cup in your possession and your girlfriend in your boots.

The cup was placed in your hands after you and Katie had run up to present it to the fans together, twin Ireland flags flapping in the wind.

You looked at her in confusion.

She rolls her eyes and very pointedly raises her brows towards Laia.

You know what she means now and you grab Laia’s hand. You force it around the other handle of the cup and start to run.

She’s dragged with you for the first few metres before she’s sprinting forward with you. The wind blows in her hair and your flag fans out like a cape.

The fans are chanting your name. They’re chanting Laia’s name too.

They’re chanting your names together as your thrust the cup skywards.

You’re grinning at the crowd before you’re pulled into a kiss right in front of them.

You kiss back and you don’t even care when Katie sprays you with champagne.

#woso x reader #laia codina x reader #laia codina #woso community #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso

[talkin-tdc]

Ranting about my favorite character XD

I love Ordon…but I need to rant about him a bit

Ordon is quite frankly one of my favorite characters, I love what he does with Rian and their cute interactions after he turns good and all that…but that’s why I wanted him to survive and why I have to fault him for all his DUMB moves!! (Also I get that the gelfling aren’t supposed to be the brightest or some suspicious, so just take this in good fun as an outsider looking in/advice I would’ve given him if I could).

I’m not going to fault him for putting Tolyn in charge because honestly that was one of his few good choices. He’s fiercely loyal to the lords and the crystal which is what he was supposed to be so while yes Tolyn sucks and he basically killed the guard, can’t blame Ordon for that one in a good conscience…

You know what I CAN blame him for though? His complete lack of awareness in the carriage scene! Like, dude, you are the head of security! The Captain of the crystal guard and you let some rando maiden who looks to be a princess (but you don’t know for sure because she could be lying) into the lord’s carriage?! And people might be thinking ‘Oh, but SkekOk insisted’ and yeah he did but would it have killed Ordon to at least try to be more vigilant? Like do a pat down or question her to validate her claims or something? Have her empty her pockets? No? Nothing before he lets a random girl on the street into the carriage of the lords of the crystal?! She could’ve had a knife, or poison, or a million other things and he doesn’t even bother to check. It didn’t even seem like he knew her or had met her before evidence by the fact that he referred to her as “girl”. Yet he lets her in without even asking her name if something bad potentially happened, just trusts that the crowd says she’s a princess.

Next up for stupid decisions is the decision to not talk to Gurjin or get any tangible proof while he was at the castle that Rian killed Mira. I mean I know most people can write this one off, but honestly this is the most heinous in my opinion. Like he doesn’t even see her body, heinous. Let me say that again for the people in the back ahem HE DIDN’T EVEN KNOW FOR A FACT THAT SHE WAS DEAD!! You couldn’t even be bothered to ask about the body? Like ‘hey can I see her stab wounds to know if a gelfling really killed her?’ Not even that?!?! She could’ve been kidnapped for all he knew! She could’ve still been alive marking Rian innocent, but nooo we can’t have common sense can we? And not even trying to talk to Gurjin? Come on! He’d be far more likely to admit to you than anyone if your son really did commit a crime. He didn’t even check to see if Gurjin had the sickness that Rian had. He surely needed to prepare himself for the journey to find Rian, he couldn’t have swung by just to try to investigate? Couldn’t have asked Tolyn to investigate and make sure Gurjin was actually sick or showed any signs of sickness before you left?! It’s like he wants to believe Rian’s a murderer and was sick to protect his own reputation, that is not the thing to be worried about in that scenario!

Finally we come to his stupidest decision yet, going with Rian to Ha’rar. While yes there were a lot of emotions after the dreamfast and obviously that clouded everyone’s judgment, it made absolutely zero sense to go there together. Why not hmmm I don’t know have the all maudra’s daughter go with him instead of the gelfling who is said father of the accused murderer? Like Tavra could get an audience with Mayrin way faster than Ordon could. Plus she’s a third party without Ordon’s bias. I’m also sure it’d be just a little bit easier to get Gurjin out of the cells or try to save the guard or figure out more information on the Skeksis if he went instead of Tavra. Plus while running in the forest, Ordon stated he had knowledge of more of the Skeksis wrong doings, so it also could’ve made more sense if he had spoken to Maudra Fara about their info and convince her earlier that something was up.

Anyway yeah, rant over. I love him as a character but his choices could’ve been better for survival. I really wish he could’ve survived for season two if that had ended up happening but it is what it is. Let me know your thoughts on him as a character!

#rian #gelfling #gurjin #ordon #captain of stonewood #captain ordon #dark crystal age of resistance #tavra #dark crystal #skeksis #stonewood #drenchen #vapra

[starlightshadowsworld]

Fairy Tail x Winx Club

Aquarius was pissed.

She knew Layla wouldn't be the happiest with her choices but hoped her old friend would understand.

That disgrace for a human being could not raise their darling Lucy.

He wanted Layla's keys to be locked away, any trace of her too be hidden.

He yelled at Lucy when she sobbed and left her for hours on end.

And he was just insufferable.

Despite his efforts to pretend his wife hasn't existed at all, he had neglected to inform her family she had passed.

And while Layla hadn't left on the best terms, they had adored her....Aquarius hoped that they would be willing to care for Lucy.

Now to find them.

.

"Oh lighten up Griff" chuckled Faragonda, Griffin glared at her old friend but took a drink of her lemonade. "Your awfully cheery, Fara you must've figured out the prank my girls were planning."

The deadpan look from Faragonda made the witch snort.

"Ah, we need more days like this." Said Griselda with a sigh. The teachers were all in a park in magix having a picnic.

It was something they tried to organise bi-weekly though it was hard at times.

Now though, with spring break they had some time to relax.

Or so they thought.

The next thing they knew the fountain beside them started bubbling and a mermaid of all brings sprung out of it.

"Aquarius?" Asked Griffin, staring at the spirit in shock.

"You two know each other?" Asked Codatorta, raising an eyebrow. Griffin folded her arms, stern "we do... To what do I owe the pleasure."

To Griffin's suprise the usually spiteful spirit looked saddened.

"Layla has passed on."

The glass Griffin held shattered in her hands.

"... No... She can't have..." Her friends and colleagues watched in shock as she trembled in sadness.

Aquarius shook her head mournfully "A week ago, she had been buried in the Heartfilia gardens."

The sadness shifted to rage.

"What?! What do you mean?! Why was I not told sooner?!"

Aquarius let her rant before holding a hand up "you know as well as I do that he wouldn't have allowed it. He wanted us locked away, doesn't even know I'm here."

Griffin shook her head "she can't be..." Faragonda held her old friend close. She didn't know who this spirit was but she knew of Layla.

All those closed to the Cloud Tower Headmistress knew of her mysterious younger sister.

To hear she had died, a week ago was a lot to take in.

Griffin didn't speak of her much, though sometimes she got nostalgic.

Or had a few to many to drink.

And would speak of a spunky, headstrong and kind hearted girl who hadn't always agreed with the others antics but usually joined in either way.

And had left her family to marry "the one."

Layla and Griffin had an argument which lead to Layla leaving, Griffin hadn't even shown up to her wedding.

Something she lived to regret.

And now... Now she could never make amends with her.

"You know our Layla, got involved with something too big for her... And it had consequences. She became ill but she didn't want to worry anyone." Said Aquarius.

Griffin chuckled, a mix of a laugh and a sob "that's her alright..."

Aquarius looked down "It's not just that... She gave birth several years ago and...I can't leave her with that... Thing!"

She spat the word with so much hatred.

Griffin blinked in suprise, Layla had had a child?

"What's she like?"

Aquarius smiled for the first time since she'd arrived, for the first in a long time.

"Her names Lucy, she's small and terrifying. Asks a million questions and likes to run around in the gardens and get muddy."

Aquarius softened "she's the splitting image of her mother. Though she has your eyes... I came to ask if you would be willing to take her."

Griffin nodded "I will."

"Are you sure Griff? Raising a kid it's...a lot." Said Faragonda, Griffin nodded with a small smile.

"I can't leave her with that man, he was an asshole when I met him and that's when we were teenagers. It'll be hard but, I want to take her in." She said with determination.

Aquarius smiled, relieved and Loke appeared carrying a sleeping Lucy.

Griffin took her from him, she had to be around 3 and fast asleep. She had a simple white dress and was barefoot.

She was a splitting image of her late sister, Griffin teared up looking at her.

"Hello little minx, I'm sorry we couldn't have met under better circumstances. But I'm your Auntie Griffin, I don't know if your mother mentioned me but, I'm going to be looking after you. You'll be safe here with me, and have a lot of my students wrapped around your little finger I'm sure."

The teachers chuckled quietly, as not to wake up the sleeping girl.

"Oh she will" said Loke with a grin and Aquarius snorted.

"I'll keep your keys safe until she's old enough, go rest it must have taken a lot to get here." Loke nodded, bowing as he vanished.

Aquarius gave Lucy a fond look before handing Layla's keys to Griffin and vanishing.

"And don't think we won't be here too" said Cadortorta with a smile "thank you friend, I'm sure going to need it." Said Griffin.

She sat down and smiled as Lucy curled up and snuggled up to her. "Welcome to Magicx, Lucy."

#Fairy tail #Winx club #Griffin winx club #winx faragonda #lucy heartfilia #I know Layla didn't have Loke but I don't care for Canon as you can see

[wosobronze]

https://twitter.com/srtalexus23/status/1709250253185011843?s=46

"a stronger accent than stanway"

- mostly unrellated but i have a small thing to add in defense. i know not everyone appreciates fara for how direct she can be when delivering cristisim (i agree sometimes) but for most of her time post retirement she's recieved misogynistic and classist comments about her voice not being paletable enough to work in media. Her strong working class london accent, her lisp, added to the fact she talks pretty quickly will understandably have been barriers for her getting into media and commentary work. i personally really hope she continues working in football media doing what she loves. her point of view is always passionate and directed towards improvement (rather than baseless crisisism) idk to me she is so tactically switched on and i especially love to see diverse women in the football media haha 🥺 rant over

very well said anon!👏🏻 sometimes, like others i do think she comes across as too direct but there’s absolutely no denying her incredible ball knowledge and her passion for the game. you can tell by the way she speaks that she cares a whole lot about the growth and development of the women’s game!

[beoneofus]

name: Isabella fara powers

sur-name meaning: poor. it originates from the old french word, povre.

nickname(s): izzy, isa-boo

gender: female

pronouns: she/they

age: 18, physically

d.o.b: error

species: half-blood vampire

zodiac: pisces

eye color: mint green

hair color: ash blonde

personality: goofy. sweet. artistic. energetic.

likes: rock music. head banging. jumping around in circles. stimming her way through her uncles long rants. yelling at random times. mocking her uncles pigeons. making conversation with literally nothing particular. painting. smoking weed. playing the drums.

dislikes: being yelled at. degradation. rude people. the emersons. bees.

background: isabella is the daughter of the loud, infamous blonde, paul. she was born under unnatural circumstances, her mother being human and her father being fated to the undead; therefore leaving her a half blooded species between human and vampire. she's always lived in santa carla, california and has only ever left santa carla at one point due to rebellion. her mother is deceased, leaving her to live with her father, brother, uncles and cousins.

fandoms: the lost boys

extra: her name, and nickname, was inspired by famous guitarist of guns n roses, izzy stradlin. / every child within the powers family was given david's birth sur-name.

#the lost boys #the lost boys 1987

[sifanjewel]

Reasons Maudra Mera is the most disliked Maudra

So I know Maudra Mera shouldn’t be counted as a “villain” of The Dark Crystal but her behavior through most of her time in the books and the small bit we get in Age of Resistance definitely lands her on many TDC fans’ shit lists, and there are very valid reasons to this. Let’s go in order, shall we?

Spoiler alert for anyone who hasn’t read the books/hasn’t finished them

1. She’s racist/xenophobic. It’s pretty much the first thing we learn about her. When Naia first encounters her in Shadows, Mera makes some not-so-subtle judgements toward her appearance (which included touching her hair. the fuck) and backhanded remarks about the Drenchen. She even went so far as to say the Drenchen mattered the least of all the clans (I’m paraphrasing but that’s pretty much exactly what she said). Even when she does act cordial and gives Naia supplies she needs for the rest of her journey, it’s all to make herself look good for treating a fellow Maudra’s daughter with hospitality and respect.

And her calling Naia her “Soggy Dear” is just... stop. Just stop.

2. She’s a horrible guardian to Kylan. While it seems good on her that she took in a young orphan after the sudden deaths of his parents, she did the bare fucking minimum of raising him. She gave him a home, fed him, taught him the Spriton way of living, but there was definitely a lack of compassion for him. It’s bad enough that she never believed Kylan’s parents were taken by the Hunter, but in doing so she denied him the ability to cope with his trauma by not giving him any emotional support. Not to mention the fact that their deaths were partly if not mostly her fault. Kylan’s mother was Spriton but his father was Stonewood, and it’s canon that those two clans have rivaled for ages, so in order to preserve her clan’s image, Mera likely had a hand in pushing them to live in dangerous territory near the Dark Wood. The most likely reasons she took Kylan in were:

a) she felt at least some guilt for what happened to his parents as a result of her actions and raised him as a way of possibly redeeming herself

b) It’s stated in the Seven Clans book that it is a Maudra’s duty to take in a childling of their clan if the parents are unable to support them for whatever reason, so he would have become her responsibility regardless

c) he had nowhere else to go, because it doesn’t seem like any other Spriton or Stonewood would willingly raise a childling that is half of the clan they despise most.

Oh, and backing off that last point, Kylan is constantly teased and pushed around by the citizens of Sami Thicket, and Mera doesn’t seem to do shit about it or try to defend him in any way. I mean no fucking wonder he ran away the first chance he got, she practically pushed him away.

I think some part of her must have cared for him, seeing how she greets him upon his return to Sami Thicket in Flames, but she really shouldn’t have been all surprised Pikachu face when he up and left in the first place. She and the rest of that village made the Skeksis feel more welcome than him.

3. She nearly betrayed her own kind for her own clan’s safety. She basically pulled a Seladon and initially sided with the Skeksis even the she knew exactly what they were doing. Even though Mera never touched Kylan’s petals she knew that the Skeksis were capturing Gelfling, they even kidnapped a bunch right before her fucking eyes and yet -- SHE WENT CALLING FOR KYLAN'S RETURN SO THAT NO ONE ELSE WOULD GET TAKEN

HOLD UP

I’M JUST NOW REALIZING THIS

SHE WAS GOING TO FUCKING TURN HIM IN TO SAVE HER ASS AND EVERYONE ELSES

I HOPE I’M LOOKING AT THIS RIGHT IT’S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I’VE ACTUALLY READ THE BOOKS BUT HOLY FUCK

DID SHE REALLY CARE ABOUT HIM??

FOR FUCKS SAKE MERA

GOD

SHE KNEW THE SKEKSIS WERE LOOKING FOR HIM AND MESSAGED THE OTHER MAUDRAS ASKING WHERE HE WAS SO HE WOULD COME BACK AND FOR WHAT?? DID SHE THINK THE SKEKSIS WERE GOING TO GIVE THE TAKEN BACK??

I MEAN YEAH I’M SORRY SOME VILLAGERS GOT TAKEN BUT ARE YOU SERIOUSLY WILLING TO TRADE IN THE BOY YOU FUCKING RAISED FOR... PROTECTION FROM THE SKEKSIS?? BY SKEKSIS???

I’m actually fuming right now. Whether or not she had known the full truth it’s completely possible she would have turned him in. At that point in time she would have handed Kylan to the Skeksis on a silver platter GOD FUCKING DAMMIT--

Oh and, she wouldn’t let the Drenchen pass through her territory to fight the Skeksis and avenge the Stonewood clan, and that she was gearing up her soldiers to go into all-out war just to keep them out under SkekUng’s orders. How desperate do you have to be to fight your own kind in favor of the Skeksis? How far was she willing to go to protect her clan? Yes, Maudras should fight for the well-being and safety of their clan but if she’s going to let the other clans fall so her own can prosper?? Bitch that’s just a whole new level of selfish.

AND NOW FOR SHOW CANON

So Mera didn’t have much of an appearance in AoR except for episodes 6 and 10, but we didn’t need much to know how she is.

Her first and obvious mistake was siding with Seladon instead of Fara and Laesid after the coronation. I know Ethri and Seethi did too but at least they ended up fully believing what was going on in the end, while it seems it took Mera much longer, because Kylan tells Fara in ep. 9 that the Spriton wouldn’t listen to him when he tried to rally them against the Skeksis. This doesn’t surprise Fara, because she knows Mera’s an expert in ass-kissery, given what happened at the coronation and the fact that their clans rival enough as it is. Just another reason we stan Maudra Fara, she knows how to call out fellow Maudra’s when they’re clearly in the wrong without fear of repercussion. Vala didn’t raise no bitch

I like to think Fara is the Maudra that Mera thinks she is, but even she knows that’s bullshit XD

OKAY. That’s my rant on Maudra Mera. If I missed anything by all means, please, do tell.

If anyone is just going to defend Mera, please note that I know she does truly turn around in the end, I just needed to remind everyone why there is slander on her character to begin with. Hope this was enlightening somehow.

#the dark crystal #dark crystal age of resistance #shadows of the dark crystal #flames of the dark crystal #maudra mera #maudra fara #spriton clan #stonewood clan #kylan #wise kylan #naia #fierce naia #character rant #it should have been her not fara

[officialromaniantranslatiuni]

Miss Translațiuni, this is gonna be a rant, but idgaf.

CE SĂ FAC SĂ NU SE MAI IA TOȚI TÂMPIȚII DUPĂ MINE????

De la adolescenți pe stradă (am 17 ani), la copii mici de pe stradă crescuți prost, la șoferi de autobuz de 40 de ani și chei și burtoși, TOȚI ÎMI SPUN CĂ CE M-AR FUTE, ÎMI PUN MÂNA PE FUND, PE SÂNI

La modul cel mai serios, nu mai rezist și-mi vine să-mi iau zilele numai ca să scap. Mama cu "bărbații și băieții când văd fete frumoase pe stradă așa fac, dă-i in pula mea" și tata cu "tu ești proastă că nu îi bați, că nu îi ții minte să mi-i arați" nu ma ajută in the fucking slightest. Cum să îi bat dacă mi-e frică de ei, că bărbații sunt mai puternici decât mine și copiii de pe stradă vin cu șatra după ei dacă le sufli în față? Cum sa ma iau de ei când eu am 1 metru și o speranță, mușchi efectiv zero? E vina mea că arăt bine, sau e vina lor că sunt niște needucați libidinoși?

Ce mă fac?

^lista de motive pentru care am ajuns sa imi urasc corpul, sa port haine cu 3 marimi mai mari si am fost obeza timp de 2 ani

sincer, nici nu stiu ce sa iti zic... colegele mele din facultatea umblau seara cu cheile intre degete, una cu surubelnita in buzunar, diriga din liceu cara umbrela si in zilele insorite din motive evidente si eu cu cateva colege umblam cu spray-uri ieftine just in case... dar astea erau pentru situatii mai grave si in calitate de persoana catcalled si hartuita in public de la 9 ani, doar castile in urechi si holbatul urat ma mai ajutau

de asemenea, credeam ca din cauza ca ma urc in masina si cobor fara sa fie nevoie sa apuc sa ma vad cu lumea, am ajuns sa fiu cat de cat protejata de "pot sa iti ling tatele" (copil de ~10 ani), "sunt naturali? pot sa verific?" (gigel de liceu), "ce frumoasa esti, fataaa" (mos de varsta bunicului meu) INSA azi am fost si eu (imi permit sa spun) agresata verbal la mall de un baejet care promoveaza porcarii din alea de curatat ochelarii doar fiindca nu am vrut sa stau la o demonstratie

si stii... te saturi sa fii tu aia matura si iertatoare asa ca ma gandesc serios sa recurg la scandal si amenintari din alea frumi rau cu topoare si taiat de membre reproducatoare

[anghraine]

regularly scheduled reminder: not all people with polysyllabic names shorten them! nicknames are not obligatory for everyone ever

#so many people: do you go by liz or is it beth? #me: elizabeth :) #like ... maybe if a character gives no sign of using one ever and nothing about their character suggests it #we don't have to manufacture one? #('darce' and 'fara' are the absolute low points but... so many characters) #*grump grump grump* #anghraine rants #words about words

[madamebaggio]

Notes: Previously...

They finally meet!

***

Chapter 3

If Faramir had asked Éowyn to move in with him and stay there, she hadn’t mentioned anything at this point.

Not that she needed to tell Éomer what she was doing with her life, but they were technically leaving in three days and he wanted to be prepared to go back alone.

He hoped he wasn’t turning into a whiny man. He was happy for her, but the idea of being alone in Edoras was a bit hard to chew, he’d admit.

As much as he wanted Éowyn to be happy and have her own life -wherever that was -he also dreaded the long days alone in a place that used to be so happy, but would -eventually -become so empty.

He would not be in Éowyn’s way. He needed to grow the fuck up. He wasn’t a boy.

They’d be having dinner at Imrahil’s that night. He’d finally get to meet the mythical Lotty, someone he was truly curious to meet.

Éowyn had even bullied him into a suit, even though he refused to wear a tie or tie his hair.

Imrahil had a beautiful house by the sea, and there were quite a few cars already parked there when they arrived.

As far as Éomer understood, Imrahil’s idea of a ‘small dinner’ involved catering to at least fifty people. This dinner in particular didn’t even have that much of a special reason. Apparently Imrahil was just happy to have them over and introduce them to some people.

They entered the house and were directed to the back garden, where they found a tent.

“Wow.” Éomer deadpanned.

“These people…” Éowyn chuckled. “Is it me… Or is this a bit much?”

“I have no idea.” Éomer admitted. “Thank you for forcing me into this suit.”

She chuckled. “You’re welcome.”

“Éomer! Éowyn!”

“Amrothos.” Éomer grinned at the young man. They shook hands as Imrahil’s youngest son came closer. “I thought this was supposed to be small.”

“Oh please.” Amrothos rolled his eyes. “Elphir loves using every chance he can to play the businessman and Lotty likes to organize parties. Honestly, they enable each other.”

Éowyn laughed. “Where’s your sister? I want to introduce her to Éomer.”

“And here I thought you’d be looking for Fara.” Amrothos teased.

“I’ll see him later.” Éowyn said casually. “Besides, Lotty is the only person in the family that Éomer doesn’t know.”

“Is that true?” Amrothos asked, surprised by the information.

“Yes. I’ve never had the pleasure.”

“Then come and meet our pride and joy.” Amrothos made a gesture for them to follow him. “She was the one that had this tent idea. I told her this looks like a wedding and she told me to shut up.”

“You probably deserved it.” Éowyn threw back.

“Why? Just because I mentioned it once? Or maybe seven times?”

Éomer was chuckling along when Amrothos called Lothíriel’s name. He followed his friend’s gaze and saw Lothíriel Prince for the first time.

She was wearing a pink dress that made her look like a fairy princess and her dark hair was pulled back on a fluffy braid. She had a single strand of pearls around her neck. As soon as she saw Éowyn, she opened a bright smile.

“Éowyn!” She came closer and hugged Éowyn. “I’m so glad you arrived.”

“This place looks lovely, Lotty.” Éowyn smiled at her. “Let me introduce you to my brother.”

“The famous Éomer.” She turned her pretty grey in his direction, the smile on her face evidencing the dimple on her lower lip. “It’s such a pleasure to finally meet you.”

She was gorgeous. Truly pretty in a way Éomer hardly ever saw. Her whole family was ridiculously good-looking, but she seemed to take it a step further. Her full lips, her cute nose, her amazing eyes… She was all pretty.

She was also very young, Éomer reminded himself.

“The pleasure is all mine.” Éomer shook her hand. “Your family loves to talk about you, and now so does Éowyn.”

She giggled, and Éomer knew it was an honest one. She wasn’t playing coy. “I hope it’s all good.”

“I’ll keep it a secret for now.”

She grinned at him again, then someone else called her name. “I’m sorry, but I need to go. I hope I get the chance to see you two again tonight.” She excused herself and left them.

When Éomer turned to Amrothos he found the younger man looking unamused. “What?”

“Don’t flirt with my sister.” Amrothos warned.

“Excuse me?” Éomer scoffed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m watching you.” Amrothos warned once again, before going to talk to someone else.

“Can you believe that?” Éomer turned to his sister, only to find that she was really amused. “What?”

“You were flirting.” She accused him.

“I said one sentence to her!” Éomer protested.

Éowyn just kept grinning up at him, and Éomer gave up.

***

Éomer got dizzy after a while at the party.

The people there were all rich and influential and most of them were assholes. Elphir seemed to thrive on the whole thing, while Imrahil was the perfect host.

Éomer didn’t feel really comfortable in a place like this and he knew that Éowyn felt the same. They were much more down to Earth and the people of Dol Amroth were really different from the people of Rohan.

In the end, Éomer ended up sticking to Amrothos or Imrahil, since he knew them better. Once Faramir and Boromir appeared he felt relieved; the brothers were good company.

He saw Lothíriel going from one side to the other the whole time. It was quite clear she was responsible for the whole affair, but she seemed happy to be doing it.

At some point, Imrahil came to introduce his sister Ivriniel to Éomer. Boromir, who was there as well, winced in sympathy.

Éomer understood why very easily. Ivriniel was an opinionated woman, and this was the only polite way Éomer could think about her. The problem wasn’t that she had opinions, the problem was that she acted as if she was the right one and everybody else was stupid or plain wrong.

She’d even asked Éomer what he did for a living, and when informed he bred horses, she asked what he actually did for work. Apparently running a ranch and breeding horses didn’t sound like a real job to her.

“Aunt Ivriniel…” Lothíriel came towards them, clearly intent on distracting the woman.

“Talking about people who don’t have real jobs…” The woman snorted. “Are you still playing with that store of yours?”

Lothíriel obviously hadn’t expected the attack, because she didn’t even have a reply to it.

“Your poor father has to keep pouring money into it, just so you can play at working.”

“This is not right, aunt.” Boromir was quick to cut in. “Imrahil isn’t pouring mo…”

“She’s been spoiled her whole life.” Ivriniel told Éomer, completely ignoring Boromir. “Poor Imrahil had to pay everything for her.”

“Just like your father paid for you your whole life, Ivriniel.” Boromir finally snapped. “Don’t be a hypocrite.”

Ivriniel glared at Boromir. “Your father would be ashamed of seeing you acting like this.”

“Not really. He didn’t like you very much as well.”

Ivriniel gasped in outrage, but Éomer finally pulled his eyes from the trainwreck of a scene to see that Lothíriel had just left the conversation.

Once he saw Elphir coming to see what was going on -probably because people were staring -he left towards the house.

There was a set of French doors ahead and Éomer entered the house. He didn’t even have to go far to find Lothíriel; she was in that exact room, furiously pacing.

He wasn’t sure why he’d gone after her; he just felt the need to. Deep down, he knew she’d approached the group to divert Ivriniel’s attention from him, only to be the victim of the woman’s discontentment.

“Lothíriel.” He called.

She turned immediately to him, her face wet with tears.

“Éomer!” She tried to put some cheer on her voice, but it didn’t work out. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this. I always end up crying when I’m angry.”

He shrugged. “Well, I’d probably have trashed this whole room, so your method looks cheaper.”

She snorted, as she kept pacing. “I’m really sorry you had to see that.”

“Don’t apologize to me.” He told her quite directly. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not your fault that…”

“She’s a hag?”

“You’re the one saying it.”

Lothíriel snickered. “I wish I could’ve said something, but I knew I was about to cry and then she’d say that I was doing it because I’m a spoiled brat.”

Éomer wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he just hummed.

“And she makes it sound as if I’m draining my father of money!” Lothíriel continued, exploding as her pacing turned almost frantic. “As if he’s been paying only for things related to me. She doesn’t give my brothers the same courtesy. My father paid for all our universities, he paid for all our apartments.”

Now she was full on rambling. “He set up Echiron’s practice and Amrothos’ office, and Elphir works for him! And yet… Yet I’m the one ‘playing’ at work? I’m quite aware that my father put money on my business and that I’m privileged because of that! But he isn’t pouring money on anything! The store is profting!”

“Lothíriel…”

“But just because isn’t a ‘respectable’ job like lawyer or doctor, it’s worth less? I can’t do what I love just because people will talk about it?”

Éomer just stood there.

Eventually she stopped and turned to him. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing to me.” Éomer asked a bit firmly. “I didn’t even say a word for the last 20 minutes.”

She chuckled. “You didn’t need to hear my ‘poor rich white girl’ rant.” She pointed out.

He shrugged again. “I knew where the door was in case I wanted to leave.”

She chuckled a bit. “Thank you for listening then.”

“You’re welcome. Here.” He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and offered her.

“A real gentleman.” She grinned at him as she accepted the offer. “Could you find my father and tell him I have a headache and won’t get back out there.”

“I can do that, but are you sure you want to do this? You shouldn’t have to miss the party because of the hag.”

“I don’t like half of the people out there.” She confessed. “I just like organizing parties and helping my father.”

“I think he knows that.” He gave her a kind smile. “I’ll go and tell him then.”

“I don’t like that, when we finally meet, this is what happens.” She murmured.

“Don’t worry, Lotty. I won’t hold your relatives against you.” He promised her.

“And please, remember me not crying.”

He thought about the smile she gave him when they were introduced. “I can assure you, I’ll remember you by your smile.”

The smile she gave him in response was gorgeous.

#madame baggio #fanfiction #posted on AO3 #moodboard #IMAGES NOT MINE #alternate universe #modern au #The Lord of the Rings #eomer #Lothiriel #eomer x lothiriel #pretty awesome in pink

[lilac-city-skylines]

Although the All-Maudra seems like a traditional monarch, the other Maudras seem more like village elders, given how involved they all seem in day to day life. Like Maudra Mera teaches children, Maudra Argot makes house calls, and when we first meet Maudra Laesid, she’s stitching up animals.

It really does feel that way, right? I think a lot of this has to do with the size and culture of a clan. The Drenchen, for example, is a decently sized group of gelfling and they don’t have an emphasis on the “mother” aspect of being a maudra. Keep in mind “maudra” is literally and old gelfling word for “mother” so it’s no surprise that all maudras are women and that the title is matrilineally given. The Spriton culture is very family-oriented and places a lot of emphasis on “mother”. This is most likely why Maudra Mera adopts most of, if not all, the orphans in the clan, has so many children of her own, and teaches most of them personally. The Vapra though, are huge. They are a large enough clan to have distinct social classes with separate tithing requirements from each class. Farmers are a distinct class that tithe crops. The aristocrat and merchant class are seen giving things like jewelry and bolts of cloth. If a clan is large enough to have class division, then their leader will be more connected and concerned with the political realm. Maudra Fara serves as this kind of strange in-between. She’s clearly upper class and deals with the politics of being a maudra more than Maudra Laesid might, but she’s also seen making house calls to members of her clan and taking time out of her day to listen to specific complaints from her clan’s members like you might see a duke or lord or earl doing in medieval times. It’s very interesting to see; the more the Skeksis place value on a clan, the bigger and more wealthy that clan is, and the more politically active their maudra is. The less emphasis the Skeksis placed on a clan, the more their maudra served as a kind of elder type figure who, while having the final say in clan matters, held less sway in the overall politics of the gelfling clans. 

Sorry, I think about this kind of thing a lot, I hope that my rant didn’t bother you at all! 

#ask #thank you! #The Dark Crystal #the dark crystal age of resistance #Age of Resistance #gelfling clan #gelfling clans #gelflings #gelfling headcanon #Gelfling #all maudra #maudra ethri #maudra fara #maudra seethi #maudra #tdc aor #tdc age of resistance #tdc

[elite-polos]

30 Days of Élite Fic ♛ Day 25: Secret Pairing: Lu x Nadia Rating: G Notes: AU - Lu and Nadia are secretly dating during high school! If you think this is ooc that’s your problem, these two will forever be soft girlfriends to me and no one can change my mind

“How did you do on the test?” 

Lu’s voice surprises Nadia, and she turns to see Lu peering over her shoulder nosily, trying to sneak a peek at her score. 

Nadia quickly folds over the corner of her packet, obscuring the score from view. “It’s none of your business,” she says coolly, turning back to face her. “For me, tests are an opportunity to demonstrate my abilities and my knowledge, not to prove that I’m better than anyone else.”

Arching her eyebrow cynically, Lu smiles in that condescending way that Nadia has seen oh so many times. “Well, I got a 10,” she announces loud enough that everyone around them can hear. “And I don’t see any point in being modest about it. You know, sweetie, far too many women learn throughout their lives to diminish their abilities just so they don’t come off as intimidating, but I believe in challenging the patriarchal values of society. Actually, I wrote my essay about that...you might want to take a look, maybe you’ll learn something.” 

Nadia chuckles, unimpressed. Lu’s snide remarks used to light a fire under her, one that made her work harder and harder just so Lu wouldn’t always have her way. But now, she’s learned to become more self-assured in her abilities, and she doesn’t feel the need to constantly compete against Lu. 

She’d gotten a 10, too. Even though their classes used a curve system, a lot of their teachers had discovered that both she and Lu were too outstanding to place one above the other. 

Things had changed between them, once it stopped being a competition. 

“You should pay attention to the lecture,” Nadia whispers, jerking her head toward the teacher. “Or else you’re going to have to spend extra time going over this after school.” 

This time it’s Lu’s turn to laugh, but Nadia recognizes this as a different laugh than her normal I’m-better-than-you pity laugh. It’s genuine. “I have better things to do after school,” she replies. 

At this point, Rebe nudges Nadia in the arm. “Hey, fara, look…,” she says under her breath, “I don’t really care about listening to Professor Mustache ranting on and on about whatever he’s talking about, but he’s looking over at you, so you should probably zip it.” 

Nadia turns back to face the front of the classroom so she doesn’t get in trouble. But as she does so, she smiles, ducking her head so no one sees. She knows exactly what it is that Lu is going to do after school. 

---

“How much longer are we going to keep this a secret?” Lu says as they leave school through the back entrance. She’d called her driver and told him to pick them up over there, so they could escape unseen.

“It was your idea in the first place,” Nadia objects. “You didn’t want everyone to see that you’d gotten soft for me.” She relishes the way Lu glares at her. 

“Sometimes it’s not so hard for me to pretend that I despise you,” Lu says, feigning anger, but she takes Nadia’s arm between her own and snuggles up to her. 

It still makes Nadia’s heart flutter when Lu is so openly affectionate with her. It had taken a lot for Lu to show this side of herself, the clingy, lovey-dovey side. As it turns out, Lu isn’t just the bad bitch she makes everyone else think she is (although she definitely is that, too). 

The two of them climb in the backseat of the car, Nadia sliding all the way across even though Lu has told her countless times that her driver can open the door on the other side. Her stubbornness is something to be admired, Lu supposes. 

Once they’re both buckled in, the driver pulls away and Lu darkens the window between him and them. If anyone suspects there’s something going on between the two girls, Lu’s driver is definitely the most likely to figure it out. But he always maintains his professionalism, never saying a word or even letting a questioning facial expression betray his thoughts. Every day he opens the door when they get to Lu’s house, and if Lu’s lipstick is smudged or Nadia’s hair is messy, he simply nods and closes the door behind them. 

“I don’t want to have to hide this anymore,” Lu says today. Nadia’s hand is resting lightly on top of hers in the middle seat. 

“Lu…,” Nadia sighs. “Don’t you think it’s easier this way? Don’t you think it’s easier not having to explain ourselves to anyone? We’re good like this, aren’t we?” 

“But what if I just want to kiss you good morning in the hallway, like all the other couples do?” Lu says, and it makes Nadia bite her lip. 

Nadia can’t deny that she likes the idea too. She’s grown to care so much about Lu, and it pains her to pretend she doesn’t. She would love to have a normal relationship. But it’s more complicated than that. Lu’s suggestion is still just a daydream for Nadia. 

“I just don’t think I’m ready for that yet,” Nadia says. “Regardless of us finally admitting to everyone that we aren’t arch-enemies, I...it’s just, I know everyone will see me differently. And for now I’m just more comfortable keeping it quiet.” She says all this without looking Lu in the eye, afraid to see the hurt there. She doesn’t want to be a coward, but this whole breaking out of the perfect mold she’s always lived inside is a process, and it’s happening little by little. 

But instead of being upset, Lu leans over and rests her head on Nadia’s shoulder, an awkward position considering the space between them, so Nadia appreciates the gesture even more. 

“Okay,” Lu says. “It’s okay. I don’t want to pressure you to make this—us—public before you’re ready.” She’s learned the hard way several times that she can’t make everyone do things the way she wants them to, and she’s making peace with it. 

“Thank you for understanding,” Nadia says softly, laying her head on top of Lu’s. She reflects, not for the first time, on how ironic it is that their relationship has evolved into this. 

“One more thing,” Lu says, sitting up to look Nadia in the eye. “I...I just want you to know that, whenever you are ready, I’ll be here for you and I will stand by you. Because, well, I love you. And that’s what you do for someone you love.” 

Nadia’s eyes widen, and she searches Lu’s face for some kind of further explanation. “You...what?” she breathes. 

“Oh come on, Nadia, you don’t have to play dumb, you know exactly what I said,” Lu deadpans, slapping her playfully on the arm. 

Nadia laughs, loosening up. Then she falls quiet again, shyly looking at Lu with her head down. “I love you, too,” she says. And it feels so, so good to finally let it out. 

Lu might not make her life easy. But she knows now that that’s not a good enough reason to give up on love. 

Cupping Nadia’s face with a velvet-soft hand, Lu plants a quick and emphatic kiss on Nadia’s cheek, and Nadia’s fingers immediately go up to graze the spot she’d kissed, still feeling the warmth of the contact. 

“You’re right, anyway,” Lu says, and Nadia furrows her brow in confusion. “The school wouldn’t be ready for us to be a couple. Together, we’d be way too powerful for their little brains, don’t you think?” 

At that moment, the car pulls smoothly into Lu’s driveway, and her driver opens Lu’s door. Nadia doesn’t get a chance to respond, but she follows Lu into the house, smiling the whole way. 

#30days #elite #elite fanfiction #lunadia #lu x nadia #nadia x lu #i wrote a thing

[aughraseye]

Character ask: Deet

@glow-moss Thanks for the ask!!

Why I like them

I pretty much like everything about Deet. From the first moment she comes on screen we get a chance to experience Thra through her. Her character is so in touch with nature, so tuned in to the animal and plant life, as a viewer I always wanted more of her scenes so we could better glimpse this other world.

She’s incredibly caring and her kindness just strengthens her convictions and actions. I like this because in some stories kindness is portrayed as weakness, but AOR is definitely grounded in the ideas of interconnectedness and the bonds of community. Deet is also open minded, smart, and always willing to approach others with good intentions and in good faith.

She is a precious baby. But she’s also not afraid to throw down when the other options have been exhausted. I love her.

Why I don’t

I don’t like that Deet is related to Bobb’n. He’s evil and makes me love Deet less just by virtue of existing.

Favorite episode (scene if movie)

I really liked when she and Hup go to Stone in the Wood. It really spoke volumes how wiling she was to see the best in others when presented with so much evidence to the contrary. I also love her little rant when she’s trying to get in to see Maudra Fara. And I LOVE when she busts Hup out of jail. Remember folks, good people break bad laws.

Favorite line

I can’t really pick out any one line from her that I liked above the others. I will say though that she has a tendency to babble and anytime she does it I die.

Favorite outfit

Really liked her Vapra disguise.

Also her blindfold was pretty cool and a nice way for her clothing to communicate part of her story.

OTP

Stonegrot feels inevitable so that? Plus I really don’t ship her with anyone other than Rian.

Brotp

Deet and Hup.

Her friendship with Hup was my favorite of all her relationships. Sorry Rian.

Head Canon

This is less a head canon and more something I don’t see discussed often, but Deet gets away with a lot of crazy shit because she comes off as ‘sweet’ and ‘gentle.’ In reality, she’s actually pretty wild and reckless. We have in-canon evidence of this with her dressing up to go save Hup, making the bombs, harnessing the darkening, etc.

I like to think that this is a trait that long preceded her forays above ground. Maudra Argot probably even encouraged it just for kicks while her fathers struggled to reign in Deet’s predisposition for chaos. While she probably doesn’t see her behavior as anything TOO extreme she’s definitely done stuff that would make Rian and Mira’s antics in the castle look like child’s play.

Unpopular opinion

I do not want Deet and Rian to become a canon couple until someone at least tells her who Mira is. At the end of season 1 Mira was never brought up around Deet, and we’re kind of left to assume that she doesn’t know who Mira is. That bugs me because Mira was literally the catalyst for Rian betraying the skeksis and starting the resistance. She’s a hugely important character plot wise and to Rian so I really feel like Deet needs to at least know her name before she and Rian become official.

A wish

I would really like Deet and Seladon to talk again. The last time went so badly, but was so close to being something great. I’d also like more Brea and Deet scenes and more Hup and Deet scenes.

I’d also love for her to not be a literal vessel for the darkening that’s killing Thra, but you know...can’t always get what we want.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

I’ll literally die if Deet is destroyed by the darkening.

5 words to best describe them

Sorry Aughra but gentle is not a word I would use to describe Deet. This girl is badass, strong, kindhearted, protective, and adorable af.

#deet #age of resistance #the dark crystal #ask meme #rian #stonegrot #mira #hup #mine #anti-bobb'n

[abalonetea]

@asinglenote7​, @writinginslowmotion​ and @anika-writes-things​ all asked to be tagged in this rambling rant about the multi-verse that takes up Cat House Productions! it’s going to span several posts, and will be under a cut!

hold on for the ride! it makes sense in my head; let’s see if it will make sense on pen and paper too!

as we learn in the first Groundhog Day book, a multi-verse exists inside of the Fara universe. 

fun, meta fact? it exists in all of the books in the Cat House series. They are all connected! so while we’re going to start building within the Fara ‘Verse, this will expand out to explain how all of the worlds connect.

picture each world like an overlapping circle.

Fields of Fara, home to Locke and Blue, of Groundhog Day, is the largest circle, at the very center of the universe. it’s the original. 

next to it, and slightly smaller, is Fara Falls. these two worlds are mirrors of each other; foils of each other. this is represented by the fact that they have a huge overlap.

then, you have the second set of released worlds; notice that there’s less over lap? 

the further away from the main source (Fields of Fara) the less alike the worlds become. 

*in one set, Twilight is queen

*in another, there is no queen

but these worlds all have their own foil. 

_-_-_

some worlds have more than one books set in them! Fields of Fara/Fara Falls has seven books set there.

some worlds overlap with more than one world! see how all those circles connect to Fields of Fara? that means they are all compatible.

but what’s that mean?

simple! 

if a world overlaps, then it’s capable of connecting or linking up with the places it touches!

-_-_-

more to come soon! these infographics actually take a bit to make, oops

#multiverse theory #cat house productions series #writeblr #katie writes #chp important

[orangejuicex3-mieoi]

Lol different anon from the last one but I’m dying to know stuff about cop and criminal, the nature of their relationship and stuff!!! (& also Yukata boy and his bf because hello I’m in love with his bf lol and I wanna see how their dynamic has developed). No pressure tho!!! I love ur art

tbh it kinda sucks bc i dont rly have a lot of lore for cop and criminal like i know i want cop to be named benz and criminal to be named mercedes and that their first meeting would be criminal running away from stealing something (bc shes a klepto) and bumping into cop while shes running (cop not being in her uniform but being in casual clothes just out chillin). i actually had plannd a bit of criminals backstory out before like that shes the daughter of a millionare or some shit like that but is still a klepto and cant stop stealing. im not sure if ill go wit that but i havent rly thought about them in a fat minute UGRUGDF as for cop i feel as if her character is the type that shes like a cheerful happy person but is pretty sly as far as like her actions like i imagine her being popular with her team in the police and her being well liked but also just being known as sort of that person who doesnt always seem honest but its like ‘who cares shes not lying to us so its fine”! 

and as faras cop and criminal go my initial feelings for it r that after the initial meeting cop and criminal keep seeing each other bc criminal keeps getting caught stealing but cop wont end up calling it in so cop kinda becomes a dirty cop in a way??? idk how to explain it like its like a cycle of

criminal gets arrested > sees cop more as she gets arrested > so thus wants to get arrested more

and so thats how their relationship grows! 

and i know i want criminal to be a full on lesbian like a lot of my ocs r bisexual but criminal is only good with women and im unsure for cop rn… i want to say shes a lesbian too but i feel like she wouldnt tell anyone? like not bc shes scared but bc sheslike on that “its no ones fucking business” shit UGJDGUJ

thats really the only lore i hab for them rn!

also these drawings r sort of me tryna show criminal might come from a wealthy background already:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BwNJ0XKHj1k/

https://www.instagram.com/p/BsTO55mHvHE/

and ive actually talked so much about ryuusei and akio ive developed a lot of their lore already as far as their relationship goes but im just too lazy to type it bc then i get into rant so ill talk about it one day ive said it a million times on streams and on my instagram stories but ill mention it officially one day!

[yoli-cu-capsune]

oi, iară îi jăle

24 ianuarie 2022

mid winter. a feeling of chronic numbness is taking over my body.  im starting to hit a new low again.  

oki sa lasam la o parte incercarea de a scrie compuneri la romana si hai sa incepem.

ZAIBAL.

de o bucată mare de timp nu sunt sincer cu mine. it just doesnt go away.

i’m so sick of not being able to express myself properly.

ma simt ca intr-o inchisoare, iar lucrul ironic este ca cheia spre libertate se afla in mainile mele. vreau sa fiu liber odata keezda masii. subconstient, aleg sa-mi petrec timpul aici. sunt speriat.

more often than not i feel  inadequate  că nu pot tine o conversatie normala fara a fi ciudat si awkward. its killing me. incerc sa ignor asta de cand ma stiu. hoping it will get bettter but it just doesnt. nu ma astept ca cinva sa creada ii ca intr-atat de grav asta cum mie mi se pare (theyre right).

but i cant help but socializing brings me a lot of anxiety. chiar si cu cei mai apropiati prieteni, ma simt de parca nu pot pune nici un efort in conversatie. its bland and boring a lot of the times.

sometimes i cancel plans with people for the fact that i cant bring anything valuable in conversations. ma simt ca nu am nimic de zis tf. cum dracul oamenii vorbesc asa efortlessly nu as inteleg. te-ai gandi ca in tartucuta asta este ceva. da blin ii gol de prea multe ori.

ii greu sa primesc placere din conversatii when my brain is wired this way.

cateodata vreau sa imi imaginez cum ar fi aratat viata mea if i got this part right. mai multe usi ar deschide. experiente, prieteni noi. phd as merge spre extrovert.

acum ca ma gandesc. cam toti prietenii care ii am is din cauza ca ei au facut primul pas. sure i had my part in putting effort to maintain these friendships. but this thing says a lot about myself.

blyadi eu nu stiu sa imi fac prieteni.

printre altele, citisem recent ca calitatile *cacafonie* care le admiri cel mai mult in idolii tăi, sunt calitatile care urmeaza a fi descoperite in tine. ma vizualizez ca cineva cu care poti avea o conversatie faina, whos balanced in their way of speaking, and generally a good vibe for their friend group. da doamne sa ajung la asta.

oleacă de rant, oleacă haotic.

noapte bună, păpușăi!

v-am pwpat <3

la sigur am greseli gramticale. will edit later

yk as much as this shit is uncomfortable to admit. it feels liberating to feel my issues being heard by myself. daca asta are sens

#live laugh love