#5 mins after this i did send a ‘(bad joke)’ message in the group

[evermoredeluxe]

(talking about a movie) i think im soooo funny 🤪

#im being sarcastic #5 mins after this i did send a ‘(bad joke)’ message in the group #this is why my friends say im not funny btw #arshia talks

[craftypeaceturtle]

Distanced, part 2

Summary: How are these useless students coping with life?

Note: This is a group chat fic, my first one so this might not be that good! Also this contains swearing. Eventual intrulogical. 

Part 1 here!

.

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 13:02

Hello, sorry to interrupt, but I just want to ask where you gathering your sources? Are there any particular databases you’re using? Thank you.

Remus Prince: I’m just going through the read list.

The reading list? But that only has one text that could be anything remotely useful for this topic!

Remus Prince: ye but it’s a starting point

Remus Prince: like u can read it and then read whatever it references.

Are we allowed to do that?

Remus Prince: wha

Remus Prince: DUH! 

Surely that must count as plagiarism or something of the sort. You can’t use someone else’s sources.

Remus Prince: u sound so stupid

Remus Prince: u’ll read the book it references and form ur own interpretation.

Remus Prince: u’ll get different quotes

Remus Prince: u’ll be using it for a different argument

Remus Prince: why would u not be allowed to read texts!

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:13

Okay I emailed Dr Smith and he said it was fine. Thank you for the advice.

Remus Prince: OMG

Remus Prince: You actually told the teacher on me!

The teacher agreed with you? You’re not in trouble.

Remus Prince: THAT WAS MY SECRET!

Remus Prince: now the teachers actually think I’m capable

If it makes you feel better, I did not mention your name.

Remus Prince: you really had to double check?

Maybe I was being a little paranoid but I don’t think you understand the crisis I’m currently having. I typically spend hours running around the library and searching random titles to figure out suitable texts. When all this time I could have just been using the references! I am beyond furious and relieved at this new technique to research. 

Remus Prince: ah of course

Remus Prince: you totally came across that way in the 2 messages you sent

My world view has been fractured, I think that justifies not texting much. 

Remus Prince: why did you apologise

Excuse me?

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: now who sucks at reading!

Remus Prince: You said sorry in the first message.

I wasn’t sure if you were in a lecture or class. It’s polite.

Remus Prince: nah

Remus Prince: I’d answer even if I was.

That is not nearly as comforting as you are intending. How far along are you in your research?

Remus Prince: honestly?

Remus Prince: I’ve read five pages in on a book on the reading list. 

Remus Prince: I’ve done like nothing.

That’s indeed some amount of research. Again, as long as you are done by the 15th then whatever it takes.

Remus Prince: See you said no judgement but I picked up a lot of judgement

We have already agreed your reading comprehension is not the best.

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: so what are u up to?

Actually working on the research project.

Remus Prince: im bored

Remus Prince: I’ve been sitting waiting for my washing machine for like 9 hours 

Remus Prince: maybe later I will do work

I sincerely doubt it has been nine hours. How come you’re washing your clothes at such an awkward time?

Remus Prince: Awkward?

I can’t think of many students who would wash their clothes in the middle of the week day with classes. 

Remus Prince: every1 washes their stuff on the weekend

Remus Prince: plus everyone knows the weekend is for doing nothing. Might as well get all my jobs done now.

You really plan to do nothing during the weekend?

Remus Prince: hells ye

Remus Prince: maybe, at most, I’ll send Dee to campus coffee

As long as you’re done by the 2nd. Though I really should congratulate you on your superior taste to coffee shops.

Remus Prince: ?

If universal opinion existed, then Campus Coffee being the best coffee shop would be considered one. For whatever ridiculous reason, both Patton and Roman don’t really like it. 

Remus Prince: really

Remus Prince: I thought I saw Ro go in.

Roman occasionally practises lines with his other theatre colleagues and that is always where they meet up. But he never buys a drink as he is apparently a literal man child and cannot cope with a drink that isn’t just chocolate and milk.

Remus Prince: RIGHT??????

Remus Prince: my roomie V likes to pretend he takes coffee but he can only drink hot choc. 

Remus Prince: He doesn’t deserve coffee anyway

Exactly! Have you talked to Remy there?

Remus Prince: YE

Remus Prince: He practically forced me to be his friend with how incredible he makes coffee

Remus Prince: He’ll even add energy drink to mine!

Okay maybe that is a little strange. But I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment. He finally convinced me to leave my usual order of a white coffee and I have not regretted it. 

He doesn’t actually add energy drink to your coffee right?

Remus Prince: ye he does but don’t worry he bullies me for it

Remus Prince: The entire time I sit and drink it he’ll be holding up his phone with 911 dialed.

That seems fair.   

Remus Prince: without being so incredibly forward

Remus Prince: do you want me to grab you a coffee now

What do you mean?

Remus Prince: Well im bored

Remus Prince: and it’s your fault for talking coffee

Remus Prince: now I really want coffee

Remus Prince: I’m now heading that direction.

I’m sorry but I cannot meet up right now. I’m doing work and then I want to be prompt coming home to help my roommate.

Remus Prince: fair thought id offer

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:20

If you’re still willing, I am sitting in the library and I would truly appreciate it if you could drop off the coffee. 

I can pay.

Obviously this is up to you. 

Remus Prince: soz was walking

Remus Prince: ye I can do that

Sorry for not being able to sit around, but I do appreciate this. 

Remus Prince: ur fine

Remus Prince: what u want

Firstly, it is “you’re”. Secondly, without sounding like a cliche film character, just say my name. Remy makes an effort to give me a slightly different order every day to “widen my tastes”.

Remus Prince: wow

Wow?

Remus Prince: For the very epitome of the nerd stereotype, did you really hit me with that “just say my name and they’ll know” trope?

Please, I can be cool.

Remus Prince: Are you begging?

Remus Prince: Also

Remus Prince: what do you look like again?

I’m sorry?

Remus Prince: reading comprehension! Fairly simple question.

I am wearing a black polo shirt with a blue tie. Caucasian with shaved hair. 5′10. 

Remus Prince: how efficient.

May I ask why?

Remus?

Remus Prince: Soz I just got our orders. 

Remus Prince: I’m really bad at faces.

You could have simply asked where I would be. I’m on the second floor, computer room 209. There’s a few others here but I’ll wave once you walk in. 

Remus Prince: okay maybe that would’ve made more sense

Remus Prince: shutup.

I know I have stated this before, but we have indeed talked before. You will recognise me. 

Remus Prince: listen I’m not fucking around.

Remus Prince: I am genuinely shit at faces

Remus Prince: it was one question prick

I apologise. I didn’t realise. 

Remus Prince: Hey I’m here, now heading up. 

.

.

MESSAGES: To Padre!!

Friday, 16:00

Greetings wonderful Pat! Did you perhaps end up baking today like you said you would?

Padre!!: Heya Ro! Yeah, we made cupcakes! We didn’t fancy making icing but we did have choc chips!

AW YEAH! Just wanted to check so I know whether to buy cake. Anything I need to pick up while I’m here?

Padre!!: All good here. 

Padre!!: Logan saw Remus today.

hE DID????????

Padre!!: Yeah, he brought him coffee. Some special coffee, not his white coffee.

ASJKDGA

(also how on this great big boundiful earth do you know his usual coffee order?)

Padre!!: Because that’s what family does!

Why would he bring him coffee?

Padre!!: I have no idea. Logan didn’t really talk about it. 

He didn’t talk about it?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

Padre!!: I don’t know what to tell you. He got all quiet. He makes it sound like they don’t even like each other but he still brought him a coffee. 

EWEWEW

YOU DON’T THINK HE’S TRYING TO MAKE A MOVE

Padre!!: I don’t know. It sounds like it but Logan said they had a bit of a tiff in the texts.

... a tiff?

Padre!!: Like a small argument.

No I knew what it means, I meant it in a “omg you’re so adorable for describing a disagreement as a tiff”. 

Padre!!: I want to joke around Ro but I am a little worried about him. He acted fine after the coffee and he said they didn’t talk. It just seems like such a weird thing to do! I’m worried Remus would try and pull something. This sounds exactly like how all those stories you tell begins. 

Lo’s not an idiot. 

He’s a nerd. 

There’s no way he would fall into his trap. He’d let us know if something wasn’t right. 

Padre!!: Good point.

I’ll be home in like 5 mins. I’ll run.

Padre!!: You don’t have to Ro.

Padre!!: I’m just overreacting.

Padre!!: Ro?

Padre!!: You better make sure you’re still looking both ways even when running!

#sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #intrulogical #fanfic #My writing #roman sanders #patton sanders

[xxbacktoearthxx]

it was just a cosmic joke

funny thing we started as strangers and might ended up as strangers again. so much progress in a year full of drama.

december 2019, nothing special.... yet.

april 2020, made a squad with the og — learned all your names, played every 9 pm until 2 am max and bruh i remember we’re just using the mic to communicate and then there’s me... i don’t do mics... all i did was listen to them and carry the team lol. if my memory serves me right, i am a pro selena user way back then haha.

may 2020 the month it all actually started.. added all of you in facebook, twitter and ig. until the squad had a dilemma and the sad part is that it didn’t last long. and then there’s you... and me... left.. you even invited me to play another game. while waiting for them to play with us we played that game.. and it’s just the two of us. me, being an introvert who prefers texting over calling suddenly it just got reversed when you said “call ako” old me would prolly decline to that invitation. but instead i just answered it and enjoy actually the game... and it became a routine for me. for us.. then we had our first tampuhan.. i don’t know how to react to that and thank God i learned how to handle your mood swings with the time being. we played every night. you called every night and i answered it without even hesitating. lol, i can still remember where i would answer that, with my fan turned on because of my set up haha you always say “fan mo” because you hate those noises... you can’t function well. and then you introduced your doggos to me. it was a pain in the ass memorizing your doggos ‘cause damn, they’re so many!!! you always send me vids and pics of your precious babies and got mesmerized by Lighting. my og fave never ever forget. until your mood swings and your unpredictable inis sa’kin became a hobby of yours. somewhere along june to july i’ve managed to memorized your doggos and ended up hopee being my fave, because hopee’s the miracle baby and prolly the cutest hehe. you started sending me links of songs which became my song choices right now, i hate edm. i hate modern musics you know that, but the weird thing is that you managed for me to like it.

august 2020, your birth month.. and my birth month. ‘twas nice to know you for quite some time even though you’re still guarded with me. august 8, mia. hibernate daw my cousin told me. and bago sa’kin ‘yun lol, didn’t wanna celebrate your existence because ganun din ako but ‘di sanay sa “hibernate” term haha. i greeted you at exactly 12 midnight and 11:59 pm with no response from you. my efforts in your birthday lol, i even made you a memoji photoshopped picture but i didn’t send it. it was supposedly an interactive greeting but you hibernated. you’re back from the dead at aug 10. then aug 16... my birthday. sinalubong birthday with your voice.. 22 by TS was the only song i listened that day. we played and you even gave me a chance to ask whatever i want for my birthday gift. since i don’t want material things... my request was for you not to hibernate for the whole year. in other words I ASKED FOR YOU. your time, your presence, you... and you agreed basta ‘wag lang ako magpuyat 2 am max. OUR VERY FIRST DEAL.

made new friends at september. you made a squad... paradox. and our og squad ult. with random people who started to become close to us. i remember the first ones. carl, clarke, christian, kulit hahaha. good times. we actually careered rank games over classic ones. october came still the squad is functioning. our group chat’s getting bigger.... and noisier lol. still our routine is there.. we call. we play.. you send vids and pics of your doggos. we share kwentos.. share music..

november 2020... was the month you legitimately gifted me. an account with agent z and so many more skins. you said that it’s my christmas gift. you gave that to me on november 11. 11-11. your favorite. I FELT SPECIAL. gumastos ka ng malaki for me... the effort of finding that acc. amaru was the original ign. spent months thinking for the perfect ign. said i love you for the first time to her. because i do.. and i appreciated the gift so much. i forgot she’s always reminding me not to be attached to her... i think it’s a little too late for that.

december 2020.. i’m running out of time. 31 days and i’ll be out of her life. - from the way she described it.. cut off and goodbye. so, spent the last 31 days with her laro lang ng laro. december 23, i made an effort. ngapa ngapa sa photoshop.. i turned hopee, lighting and cloud into a vector art 😅. and gave that’s my christmas gift to her. first ever christmas with chef. she even send me a pic of her for the first time. december 31. my supposedly last day with her.... turned out a little bit unexpected.

january 2021 naglalaro pa din tayo. you can’t seem to let me go. february, we took a break from each other. ‘di mo ako pinansin. i’m still living but i just exist lol. 20% functioning that time because of questions na hindi masagot sagot. hiatus for a month i cant believed i survived that.

march 1 at 12:05 you messaged me “buhay kapa?” and we started talking again. and we played again like we used to. shared stories. this was the time where i got so obsessed with edm and lahat ng gusto ko naipon na dapat ssend ko saiyo. kaya tinadtad kita lol. spotify was my bestfriend here lol. premium eh hahaha. missed your doggos. daily dose ko ng doggo nabalik din hehe. nauungkat nanaman ‘yung sa cut off. let go. good bye thingy.

april. my last month. the fallout month. you sacrificed your time for me. we stayed late so bad we even woke up at the same time which is so weird lol. 10 pm up to 5 or 6 am gaming. talagang sinusulit ang oras na magkasama. you even said you left your 5 man for me. april 18. you made your decision to cut me off. and it broke my heart. cried so hard. can’t even talk to you so straight because of that. 10 mins after you called me again to say that i can still talk to you.. you still can’t seem to let me go ha.

we still talk at night but not that much and then you suddenly stopped. and nasaktan ulit ako kaya i had the urge to real talk you. and you suggested a call na naging routine natin na ulit. night calls with you. until hindi nagiging healthy because of my toxic mindset and your indecisiveness and cold hearted personality. until april 30.. you really cut me off. cried 3 times narinig mo lahat...

I THINK this is it

[balizardsnakething]

TW DRAMA AND ME ACTING ON MY EMOTIONS CAUSE OF THIS POST 

Granted I did post this after sending her an apology and I’m glad I now have official confirmation that she has seen said apology. The very fact that I have sent an apology means that I had got over the situation and just didn’t care about it anymore. I also tagged @toomanyfamdom because we thought it was ✨funny✨ and have gotten over the situation (unlike some). 

It should also be noted that I haven’t had any contact with Maddy since everything that happened and at least had the decency to send an apology and move on. Also, for the record, I had nothing to do with that list of toxicity. That list was put together and shown to me by my friends. I then continued to FORWARD THE SAME MESSAGE to Maddy because I disagreed with the list. 

Let’s see, shall we? Up first on the list of hell that I had nothing to do with (and disagree with) there is... “inconsiderate of time zones and peoples family life.” This eventually turned out to be accurate, not just for me but for many others. Madison would organise events like DnD games at UNGODLY hours in the morning (because she is in American time zones) and when us British people were unable to turn up she would kick them from the game and then proceed to shame their character for an hour. Granted her uncle did pass (im very sorry for your loss), but that had nothing to do with anything. Many of us (including myself) helped Maddy and were there for her, and I have plenty of messages to prove it. 

ANOTHER thing to do with time is when I was added to one of the greatest Instagram group chats in the world! However, my sleep was abruptly ruined when Maddy group-called the chat at 4am because she wanted to play Minecraft with a friend. Please direct call next time... thanks. 

Whilst on the subject of time family life, one of the most memorable things this girl did was shame me and attack me on one of the discord servers we were both on. What made this even worse was that I had an audition for a London West End theatre school which had the power to change my LIFE. And Maddy knew this and also knew that it was worrying me and that I was extremely stressed about it. You may say ‘oh, it's just a coincidence’. If you believe that please explain why said post tagged everyone and was posted 5 mins before my audition. Maddy knew this would stress me out, I spoke about the audition and my ability to read into things many times before and she knew this would get to me! A lot of the things Maddy did were petty shit, but then again, that’s who she is. 

Next up is... “shows blatant favouritism.” Well, it’s no surprise Maddy has so many friends! But which ones does she actually care about? My friends and I witness this first hand on many occasions, one of which being another DnD game where she was the dungeon master. Maddy made the turn order by (and I quote’, “the order is in who I love the most.” This caused some of us to feel a little uncomfortable, but we continued until Maddy put each character on a path to different destinations and explained which each path was. By the time it got to me, my dyspraxia/dyslexia couldn't hold the information, and I asked Maddy to explain them all again. Maddy agreed and but then ended with, “You just used up you go, Charley.” I was so confused! Apparently, explanations waste a turn??? But this was fine by me until Maddy explained the destinations to another player, but this time, she let them choose where they wanted to go instead of keeping them on the bench, awaiting their turn. Maddy would also allow people to have longer goes/round claiming that there was more to their story. My turn would be around 2mins where someone else would be 5. Again, petty shit which still happens to make people upset. 

Note: It was not just me who felt this way! Many others slid into my dms because they felt upset with how Maddy treated others but not themselves. 

Up next is, “making your best friend feel like shit for making a joke”. Another reminder, this list wasn’t written by me, it was written by my friend who was watching from the outside. And this is very true. I would often make jokes with people about Donald Trump and America because their laws and president (not anymore) were stupid. This always seemed to annoy Maddy and hurt her feelings. I would often make a throwaway comment but end up feeling bad about it because Maddy would leave the call. I always felt like I was walking on thin ice with her because if I said something even remotely controversial, she would not speak to me and leave the call. This really hurt me because I cared about my friends a heck of a lot and never wanted to ruin any relationships with them. I would send countless messages to Maddy, apologising and crying to her, telling her not to be mad at me. THAT 👏🏻 IS 👏🏻 A 👏🏻 TOXIC 👏🏻 RELATIONSHIP 👏🏻 One joke shouldn’t be the be-all and end-all of a friendship,, but that is what It always felt like! Also, Maddy never specified it was a trigger until recently, and even after she did say it was a trigger, I held back so she could feel comfortable. 

The final thing is: “made you feel bad for your emotions.” Madison needs to learn that EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT and that people deal with things in different ways. Not everyone is smart, sensitive or skinny like she is. Whenever anyone hurt my friends, I would lash out and act upon my emotions because I didn’t know what else to do. This is something Maddy heavily criticised me for and something that eventually resulted in me listening to high-frequency sounds so I could get rid of my emotions and feel numb. My logic was that I didn’t want to hurt anyone ever again by jumping the gun and acting upon emotion. But thanks to others, I was pulled out of that loop, and I’ve learnt to use logic and reason as well as emotion. 

As for “breaking my heart”. Yes. Our friendship ending did hurt me, a lot. Just like everything with you, it is very one-sided. I was reaching out, listening and trying to help Maddy repair relationships with people whom she’d hurt. We both said equally bad things which made the ‘relationship’ toxic, and I would just like to point out that the name, ‘evil Maddy’ is cringe and I’m ashamed I was ever friends with you considering you used that in a callout post. /hj

---------------

Sarcasm aside, ima be real here because I am not afraid to tell my side of the story. So, @ thenameisnoone / Maddy. Here is a long-ass response to the post you made about me. xx

Look, I’m not going to call you out or use Politics_notmything to cancel you because I’m not like that. I’m an actual good person who really tried with Maddy and dis my best to change myself to make her feel comfortable. I left a group chat with all my friends for a week and blamed it on ‘family issues’ because I didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. I made an entire Birthday PowerPoint for her, which included some of my best and favourite bootlegs. I made a genuine effort, but Maddy didn't really do anything else but tell me to “calm down” or “not throw everything away and give in to anger or despair and calm down until you can think rationally and make a logical decision”. 

And I’m glad I actually saw this because this is a classic Maddy move. She argues with people, builds up a situation then removes/blocks them, so they cant see everything she’s saying about them (i have proof of this from a server im in.) It has happened before, and she manipulated people into believing her side of the story. 

“I am allowed to block people who lie to me about serious topics even though they have trust issues which makes them unable, to tell the truth, if it hurts them. I am allowed to talk to people who blow up on me before hearing my side of things where they would have realised what they thought is wrong even though I dont get back to people until 3am and decide to leave them on delivered/read for days at a time when I am happily talking in other servers. I am allowed to block people who accuse me of shit-talking them with my friends who I introduced them to (and I never do that) when I have only defended them and said friends genuinely were being nice to them even if they have proof. I am allowed to block people. Period.” - Maddy 

And I’m not saying Maddy isn't allowed to block people. It’s a free world. Im just defending myself :) 

Granted, Maddy did defend me and say that this situation shouldn’t change anyone opinions on me, and I can say the same. Just because I had a terrible experience with Maddy, doesn’t mean she is a bad person and I encourage anyone online who loves women’s’ history and WATT to befriend her. 

But being honest, she did also call me a bitch on a Tumblr callout post, so I had to come and write this all down for safekeeping and reblogging purposes. Im not a bitch, and that is why I’m not using my following to cancel her. But anyway,  we both had some shit experiences with each other so you can read this and make up your own mind even though I did back her up with the previous call-out post, sent her my support, apologised and didn’t block her when she was at a bad time in her life or when she needed help. If anyone has a problem with me posting this, please contact me via DM. 

Sorry, not sorry ‘bout what I said. I’m just tired of your petty shit.

#it was supposed to be a joke #u took it too far #like u always do #please just move on #your causing so much unnecessary drama #no offence #but this is just stupid #also dont presume in not gonna find out #can we also talk about how #i destroyed my mental health for u #cos u wanted someone to spy for u #cos u were once again #BEING PETTY #also florida sucks #i just thought id mention #make sure ya'll vote biden next time

[kpersonkwriter]

Perfect Imperfections

Pairing: Seokjin x Reader Oneshot (established relationship AU)

Word Count: 3591

Genre: Mainly fluff, mentions of angst and smut

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of poor mental health and self – harm, mentions of smut, poor body image and low self – esteem, Jin’s dad jokes ofc

A/N: This one is a personal one for me tbh but please remember that the models in magazines do not define what you should look like. Body image is a complex thing but please do not let it define you. You are more than what you look like! If you do have poor mental health or low body self – esteem, please talk to somebody. Whether it a friend, family or teacher please talk. And if you feel you can’t or just need to rant, please don’t hesitate to message me!

Today was the day from hell as far as you were concerned. Your meeting for the group project had been a mess because people hadn’t done their allocated work (honestly, whoever invented group projects was clearly the devil), your retail therapy had left you in tears as you found out the harsh way that you had to go one size bigger to fit into a nice pair of jeans that you had been eyeing for weeks and lastly you had the customers from hell who thought that it’d be a good idea to come in 5 minutes before closing “for a couple of things” then proceeded to walk out half an hour later with nearly £100 worth for a dinner party. To top it all off, your umbrella had broken leading you to walk the 15-minute journey back to your shared apartment with your best friend, who was back at home for reading week.

As soon as you got into your apartment, you huffed as you threw your bag on the floor before changing into one of your boyfriends’ t – shirt which you had not so discreetly stolen two months ago despite promising to give it back. You just so desperately wanted to drink some hot chocolate curled up in your bed whilst binge watching Black Mirror as you walked towards your kitchen, the idea of hot chocolate making the day somewhat better at least. However, staring at the empty contents of your fridge you were reminded that payday was still a week away as you let out a loud groan. You were sure that the day couldn’t be any worse.

“Y/N!” Your saviour had apparently arrived and you couldn’t help but let out a relieved sigh as you heard him shut the door behind him.

“Jin?” You peered your head from the doorway to the sight of your boyfriend holding four bags of what you presumed to be food. In the 2 years that you had been dating, you had come to learn that bags that Jin held were of food more often than not.  

“A little help jagi?” He gestured to the both his hand as you rushed to help him.

“What’s all this?” You laughed, leading both of you down the hallway and into your shared kitchen.

“I know that payday isn’t until next week so got you some food since you had to pay for your phone that you broke.” You bit your lip as you remembered what your idiot best friend had done. Namjoon, your loveable friend who was stuck in the depths of Freud with you during Psychology module, had managed to trip up the stars leading to your apartment after you leant him your phone since he had broken it a week prior. He had the guts to bang the door to your room with a sheepish smile as he handed you the smashed content of your phone. “But hey, at least I can add ‘falling up the stairs’ as a skill on my CV” he had grinned. In retaliation you made him buy you a hot chocolate the next day as you both ran to your 9am lecture.

“You are a godsend Kim Seokjin.” You leaned up to kiss him before the pair of you set the bags on the kitchen table. Both had got into your roles, after all it hadn’t been the first time that you two went food shopping before coming back to cook together or ordering take - out.

“Just like my face?” You merely rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop the grin painting your lips after all, dad jokes and cringey one – liners were the norm in your relationship. At first you had hated them, finding them borderline narcissistic and arrogant, yet you had come to love them. They had given you reasons to crack a smile when you had been crying or had annoyingly been the reason as to why you gave in so quickly in forgiving him after a fight. It was over for you when he came delivering those one – liners as well as some plate of food.

You had silently chosen Chinese as you put some food on a plate, taking them in front of the TV, as Jin poured some wine before joining you. He had seemed to just know you needed alcohol tonight, almost being his gift to know how you were feeling. Maybe it was your body language, or maybe it was from a general vibe or possibly subtle changes in expression including the way your eyes just seemed to be down as opposed to lighting up. Whatever it was, it was times like these where you were grateful.

Small talk about your respective days was made as you quietly ate whilst you watched some rubbish reality show on the TV. Jin moaned about his annoying boss – Min Yoongi – saying that it wasn’t his fault that his boss didn’t appreciate his dad jokes and told him to “shut his mouth and get on with the job” or risk being fired. Your boyfriend valued his monthly pay check over dad jokes, albeit begrudgingly. Yet despite his talking and the meaningless background chatter from the TV, the weight of the day came crushing down on you. In fact the past week of rushed assignments, rude customers and just bad luck in general weighed down heavily on you as you picked at your food, taking out the frustrations on the innocent chow mein as you sighed heavily.

Ever the observant boyfriend, he stopped eating as he turned his body towards you, eyebrows creased in worry at your lack of appetite. “Jagi, you ok?”

“Hmm?”

“You ok? I know that you prefer the other place but it’s closed on a Monday so I had no choice but to go this one. If you want something else I could heat up- hey why are you crying?” His hands immediately put both your plates on the mahogany coffee table before enveloping you into a hug, his hand rubbing up and down your back opening the dam of tears even more as they soaked through his dress shirt. He said nothing, the only sound that filled the room being the trashy TV and your now quieting sobs, yet it was perfect, his silence saying everything you needed to hear, his body being enough. His grip on you never loosened as tears began to subside, his shirt probably thanking you as the patch on his chest now clearly damp, white cotton sticking to your boyfriend’s broad chest.

Once your sobs had ended Jin silently went to the kitchen to get you a cup of water before repositioning you on the sofa so that you were now directly opposite him.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“It’s just this week, it’s been so…”

“Shit?” He offered, a sad smile painting his lips as he looked at you yet he didn’t push. He didn’t prod for more information but just let you nod before you sighed.

“That group meeting I had for the presentation in two weeks?”

“Hmm?”

“None of them did their parts! So I have to stay up a couple of times this week to make sure it’s ready. I had an annoying customer so I had to stay behind to close up and then my umbrella broke on the way home.” You stopped to take an intake of breath, your emotions getting on top of you as you rambled. “Then the jeans that I saw from our date two weeks ago? I couldn’t fit and that was the last one.” You cried, ignoring how trivial your worries seemed in the grand scale of things. But added to the weight of your university work, overbearing parents asking you what your life plans were (people saying that you’d know by your second year were liars. Each and everyone of them), stressing about your lack of student loan which barely covered your rent let alone other bills as well as wondering whether it’d be worth it to do further postgraduate education or just to go into work – everything had piled up. And it was today that the proverbial dam broke. No, it shattered. Yet Seokjin, your perfect boyfriend Jin, smiled as he pulled you to him once again as he gently whispered comforting words into your ear.

“Come with me. I’ve got something to show you.” He whispered, gently dragging you by the hand to the bathroom. You were confused, your bath had broke by a drunken fresher a couple of weeks ago so apart from a few towels, the sink, shower and the body length mirror, you couldn’t fathom why you boyfriend would pull you into it. “Take off your clothes.”

“I’m not up for shower sex today oppa…”

“I’m not! I promise.” He sat on the edge of the sink as he watched you strip, hesitantly albeit as you became more and more self – conscious as more skin showed, inevitably seeing your body despite wanting to avoid looking in the mirror. You were bigger than most, after binge eating when your depression had been at its worst during your teenage years, curves reflecting in the mirror instead of a thin stick figure that graced annoyingly the covers of magazines everywhere. And another thing to notice were the scars that had accompanied your growing figure, a testament to the sudden growth from the hoards of crisps, pizzas and chips (in your defence, unhealthy food shouldn’t taste so good). Your boyfriend, sending small nods of encouragement from his reflection, had been great, stressing that he loved you for your personality, ability to laugh at his always awful dad jokes as well as you volunteering to be his taster for his cooking inventions. He had stressed that he didn’t care about you scars and that you were curvy, instead complimenting you when you wore dresses to dates and saying that they accentuated your curves in the right places. And of course this all continued when you had sex, him taking the time to whisper that you looked amazing, kissing your scars as he marvelled and treated your body like you were some goddess.

Seokjin had walked behind you now that you were naked, aside from your underwear and bra, his hands stopping you from taking them off. His hand rested at your hips as his brown orbs met your in the reflection.

“What do you see Y/N?” He murmured, his breath tickling your neck, your eyes dropping in shame at your reflection, because what you saw was definitely not what your boyfriend saw. Where you saw yourself as big, incomparable to other girls and riddled with scars, a testament to your past and ongoing struggle with mental health, your boyfriend didn’t. The thought that you weren’t good enough for Seokjin had run through your head at lightening speed yet again, as it occupied your mind frequently. He was a hand crafted sculpture with his ridiculously perfect jawline as girls and boys would always comment on his perfect proportions (where was the lie though?). Wherever you walked with him, women would swoon as men would either send him an appreciative glance or daggers, whilst you just held your head down as you silently walked along. It was those times in which that you couldn’t help but think that he was more physically suited for someone who was at least on the same par as him as well. Two years in and it obviously crossed your mind, that breaking up with him would somehow be saving him almost and would save you snide remarks after he would drop you off at campus. And quite frankly, days like this only made you think more seriously about it.

“Jin I-“

“No Y/N, I want you to have a look and tell me what you see.” He gently lifted your head so that you were facing your reflection. You were ashamed, hand instinctively hugging your tummy, as you let out a heavy sigh.

“I don’t like it Jin. I just see scars and stretch marks.” You smiled sadly as you met his gaze in the mirror, turning slightly so that you were touching him, just so ready to sink into his embrace but he didn’t let you.

“Oh Y/N… Have you not learnt anything from the last two years?” He sighed, turning your head so you saw yourself in the mirror. “I love all of you.” He knelt down to the floor, never breaking eye contact with you. He kissed your ankle, just a pepper of one, before smiling fondly at you. “I love your ankles, even though you scare me to death with the amount times you roll over them going up the stairs. Not forgetting the way that I love your legs because they look sexy especially in dresses.”

Seokjin’s hands travelled up to the inside of your thighs, you flinching by reflex, slowly and gently caressing your stretch marks. “I love your thighs. You may get jealous of other girls who have a natural thigh gap but I love the way they are. I love that they’re thick because I love that I can warm up my hands in between them during the winter.” Another kiss. “I love that they jiggle.” Another kiss. “And I love it when I run my hands over them when you’re riding me on the sofa whilst we give up on some shitty rom – com. Or when you thigh ride me. Take your pick.” He winked, making you giggle a little, rolling your eyes at his comment along with a slight blush of your cheeks, for said riding had happened less than a week ago. “Hey don’t make me laugh, I’m trying to be serious and romantic here Y/N!” Anyone could tell that it was a light scolding, the crinkle in the corner of his eye showing his true thoughts.

Hands travelling to your ass, grabbing them before placing a kiss one on each cheek.  “Don’t get me started on your ass woman. I’m more of a boob man but wow Y/N.” A small smirk riding his lips as he sent another of his signature winks to you in the mirror. “The way they jiggle when you’re exercising in your leggings that hug you so perfectly. I’ll tell you a secret Y/N – I lie when I say that I have work to do and come into your living room to do it, I just love the view from behind. Especially your squats.” He kissed his fingers like an Italian chef and added a “bellissimo” in his quite frankly awful Italian accent earning a small laugh again, more sincere this time, the effects of his actions immediately having an effect on you.

“Your stomach. And before you start complaining, I love it despite what you think.” His frown was enough to tell you not to interrupt his grand speech and he peppered loads of kisses on your midriff. “You may be bigger than normal but that means you give the best hugs Y/N! I come to yours after a hard day at work because people, especially Min Yoongi, can be a bitch sometimes and I feel so comforted by your hugs. You don’t even have to say anything – it’s a gift! Also, I just love you because you don’t complain about any of the food I cook for you.” He grinned, making eye contact with you again. You were just about to interrupt, wanting to make a point about the time he practically burnt the food but put it down to “enthusiastically crisp” when he shut you up by standing up to give you a small peck on the lips. It was definitely effective for sure. “And the most important thing Y/N – if you’re heavier than average people then it’ll be harder to kidnap you. You can’t leave me Y/N! You’re stuck with me jai.” A peck on the cheeks made you smile again as he went to stand behind you, locking eyes with you again in the mirror.

“And only coming ahead of your ass by a teeny bit is your boobs. You know how I feel about this Y/N… I just love them. I love sleeping on them when I’m ill or tired, I love kissing them and leaving hickeys,” He stopped only to make a point on wriggling his eyebrows. “and I love the way they bounce when you ride me or when I’m on top. I love it when you come home and take your bra off and you sometimes unknowingly let out a sigh because you hate the underwire or when I find you sometimes just holding your boobs like when we watch a film or just whenever.” Your cheeks grew at that, damn your boyfriend for being observant. He kissed them each before his kisses travelled to your neck, breath tickling it.

“Ahhh your neck. I love it when you get flustered in the mornings because you’re either trying to find the right shade of concealer or find a turtleneck top that’ll cover the hickeys that I leave which you make the most adorable moan every time I do. And I’ll never be able to get over the fact that you trust me so much to allow me to press down on your neck slightly during rough sex Y/N. I know that opening up hasn’t been easy for you, and that trust doesn’t come easily, but trusting me to do that is something that I really take to be a privilege and I hope you know that.” A few kisses on your neck punctuated the end of that.

“Now to your face. Hmmm shall we start from your eyes? They say that the eyes are windows to the soul and with you that couldn’t be more truthful with you. Your eyes light up whenever you talk about the disabled kids that you volunteer with or whenever you talk about Tom Holland,” You didn’t miss the roll of his eyes at the latter half of that sentence but then who could resist the friendly neighbourhood Spiderman? “not forgetting when your eyebrows furrow when you concentrate. Then there’s your lips, your glorious lips! They’re plump and kissable which makes it so hard for me Y/N, you don’t understand!” He gave them a peck, leaving you wanting more of course. “Your cheeks! Are so squishable and cute! I love the way they blush even if you don’t because when you do you become the most adorable girlfriend in the world and even more, you’re mine!” His smile was wide enough to light up the universe at this rate. God you really loved Kim Seokjin.

Lastly, as both of his hands held your wrists, you knew what the next thing would be. “I love your wrists because they tell a story about you. Each and every scar that you may hate teach me something about you. To you it shows your struggles, but to me it shows how incredibly strong you are. It shows me that despite it being some of the hardest and darkest years of your life, you are the bravest person I know for seeking help from your university counselling service. Not only that but having the courage to tell your friends and family and then cutting the people out of your life who only laughed at you for it shows you’re putting yourself first for once and that makes me so incredibly happy because after giving so much for others, it’s the least you deserve.” He pauses to see a lone tear falling down your face and only kisses the scars on your wrists, no words being spoken.

“You are my inspiration Y/N. You are the reason that I get up to go to work every morning so that I can save up to spend our future together. Because even though you had a hard past, you came out so much stronger and I will try my damn hardest to make sure that your future is pain – free as possible. I promise Y/N because I love all of you. I love your imperfections and I love your perfections. I love the things that you’re bad at and equally, the things you excel at. Because we’re partners in crime and we do and will complete each other. And if you ever fall back into your dark place and your demons come to haunt you, then we’ll face it together. We’ll go to therapy or if you just need a break from everything then we’ll go away for a week somewhere. Whatever happens I will be with you Y/N and simply because I love all of you.” He took a breath, standing in front of you, in front of your reflection, so that you were facing each other.

“Seokjin, I… I don’t know what to say.” Your tears kept streaming down and sniffles echoed in the bathroom because you really were lucky to have him.

“Then don’t. Just know that I love all of you and that’ll be enough.” He kissed your forehead before pulling you in for a hug.

“Just thank you Seokjin. Thank you for everything.” You whispered, tears soaking his shirt for the second time that night. Yet you felt incredibly happy. You were happy that in despite of everything, you were loved, something that you couldn’t have fathomed years ago. You were so incredibly loved by the man that held you that you knew that you’d face everything together.

“Anything for you.”

“But you really had to mention your jealousy for Tom Holland?”

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