#3k notes is insane. insane! i love you all <3

[klaunee]

I drew this over a year ago but I guess now is the time to post it.

#hazbin hotel #fanart #hazbin hotel fanart #alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor the radio demon #why did this blow up #thanks i guess #yes the joke is that he's asexual #he's had ENOUGH! of the conversation #genuinely scared at these numbers #oh you've had sex? yeah we'll i've had enough #WHY DID THIS BREAK 1K #WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE #3k notes is insane. insane! i love you all <3

[myouicieloz]

What Friends do

Kim Minjeong x 5thmember!reader

Synopsis: winter finds out that you and giselle have been fucking. as you grow tired of her subtle glares and questions, you ask her if she wants to try it, too. She’s hesitant about it, at first, but soon confesses that she’d love to try being edged in public, and naturally, you’re more than happy to help her with that.

Warnings: sub!winter x dom!reader. public edging + cumming. vibrators. lots of plot w a little bit of smut, I guess :) I hope this is ok ˆˆ I tried my best.

Word count: 5k

Notes: I j kept writing and suddely it was 5k long lol. honestly, I think +3k words (personally speaking) might be too much… the words start to lose their meanings and my writing kind of slacks off, yk? So it’ll try to tone it down, for any future works. that’s my opinion, tbh. what do you think?

Pt.1 | Pt.2 | Pt.3

-

“Are you and Aeri unnie a thing?” Winter asks, ever so casually. Her eyes are still glued on her phone; playing sudoku, most likely.

Her words make you choke on your milkshake, coughing violently. “What? No. of course not,” You add, curiously, “What makes you think that?”

“She checks you out all the time.” Your bandmate shrugs, tone indifferent as if she were talking about the weather. “And it’s not like you’re exactly subtle, either. You’d think her face is in her tits, with how much you ogle them.”

You frown, playing with your drink’s straw. Your encounters with Aeri were happening with some sort of frequency now, although it was rather natural— you were both needy and the sex was good and easy, so it was truly a win-win situation. However, you’ve never stopped to think about the way you acted in public. Now that you did, you could observe the truth behind Winter’s comments: you’d gotten closer to her over the past few weeks. Giselle wasn’t a naturally over affective person, but she’d often be found tugging your shirt or brushing your hips, dragging you to be closer to her whenever you wandered too far.

You gulp, reminding yourself to talk to her about it, later.

“…because if you are, then it’s ok, too.” You’ve missed most of Winter’s discourse, lost in thoughts, one she’s deeply immersed into. The older girl’s voice hushes in a low, hesitant tone, the usual confidence she’d try so hard to bring on stage all gone now. “I just wish any of you told us. I-I thought we were friends! I tell you everything. It’s not fair.”

Winter’s short, auburn hair moves with the wind’s breeze, enticing her delicate appearance. She crosses her arms, rolling her eyes once she realizes you were too distracted to pay attention to her words and give her a proper answer.

She already knows about it, somehow. And she’s hurt you haven’t told her. You realize. She’s a smart, attentive girl, of course; probably figured it out all by herself.

“Sorry, I dozed out.” You shrug as she remains silent, not backing down from getting her answer—yet not amused, either. It wasn’t uncommon for you to unintentionally drift apart during a conversation, with your unnies having to explain stuff to you two, sometimes three times, before you finally managed to maintain your focus for long enough to understand. “Ok, ok. We might’ve fucked a few times…”

Minjeong smirks; she loves to be right about things. Clapping her hands, she lets out little giggles, “I knew it! Why didn’t you tell me sooner, Y/n? We’re literally best friends!”

She was right; Winter was the one you were closest with, out of all the girls, even though none of you knew exactly why. Your personalities were rather different. However, you’d often be found talking for hours and hours over the craziest topics with insane enthusiasm. You tell her everything, and she was great at giving you advice and putting you back to your senses. She never complained, not even when your banter was too frequent or too whiny for the other members to endure.

“I’m sorry,” You apologize, sincerely. You really should’ve told her: it was nothing serious, and there was no reason in hiding it. “It just didn’t even go through my mind. It was so natural how it happened the first time—and the others… I didn’t think it would even matter.” You poke her nose, noticing the way Winter’s pout turns into a small smile. You knew she wasn’t truly upset— she simply just longs to be a part of your life. “What do you want to know, though? C’mon, I’ll tell you everything.”

Your suggestive tone is the reason Winter’s face turns as red as a tomato, sipping on her Coke Zero avidly to avoid your suggestive answer.

She does smack you when your loud laugh starts attracting them attention, though.

-

“Aeri is going out.” Winter announces, taking your AirPods off without your consent, so you’d fully focus on her.

You glance at Aeri, who’s caught up rearranging a bunch of stuff in one of her small Prada purses. Your bandmate is wearing a beautiful leopard dress with scandalous black heels, pin-straight hair falling neatly to her waist and red tint kissing her lips. She looks flawless, much different from you— too cozy in your big pajamas and disheveled hair.

“I have eyes, you know.” You mumble, but smile at the sight of the Uchinaga, dropping your nintendo on the couch and whistling to get her attention. “You look so hot, Aeri unnie! Have fun!” Aeri smiles and gives you and Winter a kiss before running towards the door.

“I will, thanks Y/nn-ie! Don’t wait up for me!” She screams as she locks the door, leaving the room silent. The only apparent tension is Winter, who stares at you with narrowed eyes.

“What is wrong with you, unnie?” You scoff, annoyed as you return to your game. Mario’s red cap and silhouette can be seen through the screen in your hands, and Winter shifts on the couch, hugging her knees as she keeps on staring at you.

“Aeri is going out. Somi-sunbaenim will be there, too.” She repeats herself, making you even more confused. Seeing your frown and how her words weren’t enough to have you interested in paying her attention, Winter grabs the device, shutting it down.

“Hey! What the fuck?” You try to take it from her hands, only for her to tighten her grip.

The auburn haired girl has, unlike you, a significant amount of strength.

“Yn, focus! Aeri is going out and Somi will be there!” Her voice is outraged, not able to understand how you were so chill about this.

“So?” You are still frowning as you try to get your nintendo back, clearly not bothered. “Somi’s fucking hot, Winter. I hope Aeri fucks her. Again, I mean. You know…”

Winter’s mouth opens to a big O, surprised by your answer. You take advantage of that moment to grab your nintendo back, although she’d managed to get your sole focus. You cock your head to the sides, engines running with the earn of being able to understand what went through her mind.

“Aren’t you jealous? Or insecure?” Winter asks, frowning.

“What? No. Why would I be?” seeing her equally confused expression, you sigh, sitting properly. “Winter, we fuck, that’s literally it. Aeri and I are friends, and will only be friends. It’s just sex, really.”

It was clear that the older girl still didn’t understand your dynamics, but she bit her tongue, not wanting to be a bitch about it.

“Ok.” She nodded, messing her hair, “I just don’t really get it, I think.”

“There’s no jealousy between us, Minjeongie.” You tell her, hoping to clarify things. “Because there’s not a relationship, get it? And there won’t be one. We are friends, and bandmates, and we like to have fun, sometimes. Nothing else.”

She stands up, still looking at you as if you were an alien.

“Ok.” Your bandmate sighs, clearly disapproving your whole dynamics. “I’ll go to my room.”

“Huh, ok.”

You stare at Winter’s back while she leaves the living room, without waiting for an answer.

-

The two of you are splashed on your bedroom’s massive rug when she mentions it again.

“So… it all started with that?” Winter asks, looking at the vibrator displayed on your desk. You grit your teeth, realizing you’d simply thrown it in the first place you saw, after cleaning it. You had found the toy when doing your laundry, and decided it wouldn’t hurt to keep it extra clean, even if it had been ages since you’ve last used it.

After the day Giselle went to the party, you started noticing how curious Winter had gotten about your relationship— or lack thereof. She’d send you subtle glances whenever the five of you were hanging out, and her questions were soon becoming more and more obvious. It was fairly noticeable, how intrigued and interested the whole thing had gotten her.

With that, Winter started seeking for details of how you and Giselle fucked for the first time, which led you to the current situation: the green vibrator displayed in your hands, teasing your friend as you playfully jiggle it onto her face. You try to hand it to her so she’ll touch it, but she retreats instead, face all red from embarrassment.

“Pretty much, yeah.” You smirk, eyeing her just as curiously, “Why are you suddenly so interested, though? Would you like to try it?”

“What, no! Ew.” Her eyes go wide at your suggestion, and Winter shakes her head vigorously. You laugh at how she looks like she’s about to combust; she’s always been so composed, and so… chaste, whenever one of you mentioned anything about sex. It’s endearing, even.

You had thought, initially, that she was simply a private person— which was more than ok, of course. However, her current reactions led you to wonder if her reactions weren’t from lack of experience, too.

“Ok, then.” You tuck your vibrator back in the drawers and brush the subject off, immediately sensing how her muscles relax, and her face changes into a mix of easy features. The last thing you’d want is to make her uncomfortable, so the change is much appreciated.

You do notice how Winter keeps biting her lip, though. And the way her eyes flicker to your drawers, before focusing back on your face. You bite your cheek, too, to prevent a big smile from covering your face. She’ll come around, just like you did. Patience was a virtue, and you would happily wait for your friend to grow confident enough to come out of her shell and take whatever she wanted to.

-

“I changed my mind.” Winter announces, staring down at you with assertiveness. You snort, pouting.

“Yeah, that’s too bad. You gave me that fucking top, there’s no way you’re getting it back.”

“No.” She rolls her eyes, annoyed. “I mean, about that other thing.”

The five of you have just finished performing at Music Bank, and you’re currently trying very hard to sit still, so the makeup artist can work on getting all the foundation out of your face. As a result, you’re unable to turn and take a proper look at your bandmate, whose voice is so quiet you barely hear her correctly.

“You mean dinner? Because we still have to cook, even though it sucks, I know. It’s our day, there’s no escape.” You frown. Winter rubs her arms nervously, eyes staring everywhere but at your face.

“No!” She’s exasperated, and impatient to know you’re not playing with her: you simply don’t understand what she’s implying. Which means she’ll have to be direct about it, nearly begging. And that’s the last thing Winter wants to do. “I want to… try what you’ve suggested, the other day. With the, ahn sex thing.”

You try your best to not make your eyes grow wide, swallowing deep to keep focus. “Ok. Do you want to do it when we get back home?”

Winter hesitates. Her hands trace patterns on the beige vanity, “I don’t know. I don’t know if I want to do it at home, either.” She seems to ponder, before adding. “But I do want to do it. Badly”.

“Ok.” You nod, smiling at her to make sure she’s comfortable and completely reassured. “We can just go with it whenever you’re comfortable, then. There’s no need to hurry.”

Winter smiles back at you, before being dragged by Ningning to film that new tiktok challenge the maknae’s been so eager to shoot. You don’t mind, though. In, fact, you thrive on watching them being the silliest, carefree versions of themselves they can, while on camera. It pleases you to know they can show such part of themselves to your fans without being scrutinized or criticized.

-

The five of you are at the mall, enjoying your day off together as if you’ve never been separated in your entire lives. You’re laying in one of the waiting room’s cushions, waiting for Karina and Ningning to be done with trying on the whole store’s winter collection. Giselle’s hands are full, too, and her critical eyes examine every piece before choosing for herself. Her expressive faces leave you curious, eager to you know what thoughts go through her mind. In fact, you get so invested in trying to guess the girl’s internal monologue, you barely notice Winter’s frame standing beside you.

You haven’t touched her at all, not ever since she’s confessed to you about her urges. You know Winter must be fuming, whimpering with need and the desire to be relived, or simply touched, in any ways you’d like. Your intention was to leave the idea of being pleasured linger on your bandmate’s mind. The flashes going through her brain for weeks until she was nothing but pliable and ready for your commands, searching restlessly for an orgasm that she’d have to work really hard for.

It was the sweetest part, out of all of it. Being able to see Winter jump slightly whenever your fingers brush her skin, like a lost, fragile bunny. You adore it.

“Y/n.” She whines, and you can hear the neediness in her voice, no matter how much she tries to hide it. “I don’t want to wait, anymore. I want it now.”

You roll her eyes at her demands, even though you’ve already decided you’ve had enough playing, too.

“I do have something for you, Winter.” You tell her, reaching your arms out. Once she gets to you, you kiss her hands, ever so gently. “Something to make you feel better. To kill the urges that have been going on your body for weeks, now. Would you like it?”

Her voice falters. “I thought you had forgotten about t-that.”

“Oh, I could never.” You think your smirk will surpass your face, with how much you’re smiling. Ever since she’d pleaded for you to touch her, your mind has been plagued by the numerous ways you’d take her, ruining her pretty little body until she was passed out, drunk on her orgasms. “Shall we, then?”

Truth be told, the anticipation you’ve built was starting to get to you as much as it riled Winter up.

She was confused to be guided to the restroom stalls rather to the car. Were you not taking her home? How else would you get a taste of her, like you promised, then?

Her thoughts, however, dissipated once you started to unbutton her jeans, letting the loose piece fall through her knees.

“W-What are you doing?” She paled, trying to reach for them back. Her back hit the wall, and she was once again reminded of how petite she truly was, cornered by your frame. She tried her best to nudge you, hoping to get you off her. Your feet, however, were stamped onto the ground, and the grip you had on her hips was a tad too strong. She gulped, realizing you’ve allowed her to overpower you every time you played games or competed for something. “Someone might c-come in, Y/n. Please…”

It aroused you to have her begging so quickly. You’d barely touched her, yet there she was: with her mouth half open and her fingers poking, scratching your neck. You smiled.

“They can.” You confirmed, seeing her gulp. “We better not take long, then. Right? We wouldn’t want anyone to see you like this. You look so pretty, though. I wish you could see yourself, right now.”

Your words were nothing but true. She looks so adorable, it leaves you aching. Your hands twitch, tense with how much you’ve envisioned groping her tiny body and sticking your fingers up in her cunt until she was screaming loud enough for everyone in that store to know what you were up to.

You’d wait for her to come around and be confident, though, just like Giselle did to you. Besides, the anticipation was part of the fun.

She hums, already feeling herself become lightheaded by your praises. Soon enough, Winter finds herself getting distracted by your sweetness, and it’s not long until she’s completely relaxed under you. In fact, she’s so engrossed by your frame, she barely registers your hand. It trails lower, and your fingers brush her clit through her small panties.

Winter drops her head, even though she’s no longer worried, and looks up to meet your eyes.

“I did say you were going to get what you’ve been asking for, didn’t I, dearest?” You explain, focused on her big orbs. Winter’s eyes observe your every move, attentive. “And you’ve been doing so good with the shows and rehearsals… You deserve a treat, naturally.”

You allow your hand to cub her sex, slowly caressing it as you feel her shiver under you. With gentle manners, you insert two of your fingers into her cunt, smirking to find her already dripping wet. She moans so loud you start placing small, wet kisses down her neck, to gather her focus back to you and not to the deep, unhurried pleasure your fingers provide her, now pulling in an out in a slow rhythm.

Taking all of her in, you add, “Do you like this, Minjeongie? The thrill of knowing someone might walk in and know how dirty you are, spreading yourself for me with such ease?” You smirk, not resisting on rubbing her clit for a few seconds, before your fingers find the place they were meant to wander for so long. “God, your cute little cunt is so wet already.”

You let out a little laugh, reminding of yourself of your intentions as you retrieve your fingers from her pussy, making her lick them clean. She does so, like a good, obedient girl.

“You always excel in everything, unnie. Such a good job you’re doing.” You praise the girl locked in your arms, immediately shutting down her needy whines and complaints.

“Please don’t stop…” Whatever words Winter’s had in mind die the moment she spots a small toy in your hands. You flicker it between your fingers, allowing her to process what you intended to do. “It this—“

“What you’ve told me about? Yes, it is.” You smile, making a show of sucking and getting the vibrator wet for her yourself. This time, it’s her turn to have a darkened gaze, one filled with hunger. Her attention is all on you: on your next movements, on your body. You adore it. “I even got it in purple, just like you had told me. It’s so pretty, Winter. A pretty little toy for a pretty girl, begging to be ruined.” You murmur, getting to your knees and facing her pussy. Your gaze never leaves hers, careful to not miss a single breath of hers.

Winter is truly a sight, and you want to make sure you’d remember all of her sensitive, fast responses.

In fact, you were actually very surprised when Winter went to your room in the middle of the night, confessing about her few, failed sexual experiences and what she’d like to try, someday. It wasn’t unusual for you to talk about sex with your bandmates, although Winter never spoke about herself to you— at least, not directly. However, the two of you were already used to talking about numerous topics, and the conversation went by easily enough. You were pretty surprised to hear her confess, with a quiet tone, about how much the thought of herself being tossed around like a doll aroused her. How she sometimes fantasized about doing things in public, yet hidden enough so people wouldn’t be completely sure about her actions. It pleased her, knowing she’d be clouding their minds, leaving them wondering without a proper answer. Though they’d have their doubts, no one would have a clue about it: that was what aroused her the most.

Of course, you were more than eager to make her wishes come true, and the current time seemed like the perfect one to do just that.

Winter’s pretty cunt’s all on display for you, and you can’t help but to get a taste of her. So, of course, you do so: parting her folds, you give her clit a brief, sloppy kiss. You feel your friend’s delicate fingers forging a firm hold onto your hair, and Winter tries her best to not make any noises. It’s the same as nothing, though.

She is, just as you had imagined it, too sensitive.

“No! Y/n, don’t tease…” She huffs, frustrated. As the toy slips inside, she can’t help but to let out a high-pitched scream—one that’s muffled by her own hands, who run towards her mouth in hopes to keep herself quiet. Her shoulders shake due to her laughs, then, as she fails terribly.

Seeing her so carefree is more than enough to have you giggling, too. You mess her hair, pinching her cheeks.

“Behave, ok? If you’re good enough ‘till the end of the day, I might reward you when we get home.” You promise Winter as you get up, zipping her pants back to place adn kissing her cheek.

The look she gives you assures you she’ll be anything but.

-

“Are you okay, Minjeongie? Your face is all flushed.” Karina asks the red-haired girl, as the oldest sits beside you at the restaurant.

The three of you nod, and Ningning is quick to put her palm over Winter’s forehead.

“You’re hot, too. And all sweaty. Were you this sick earlier in the afternoon?” She asks, with a worried tone. Winter takes a sip of her water, hoping to collect herself before answering her bandmates, but nearly drowns herself in it once you increase the intensity of the vibrations. They echo into her cunt, making it impossible for her to answer anything straight.

She was so stupid, thinking it was an easy task: walk around with the girls as they tried some clothes on, then attend dinner, and soon to go back to their dorms, where she’d get her reward for being a good girl and finally get properly fucked, like she had silently begged you for so long. No, she was a smart, attentive girl. How could she not have predicted that stupid toy would send such hums deep into her walls? It was difficult to stay still, and nearly impossible to focus or to keep her mouth shut. In fact, she feared deeply she’d just end up moaning loudly if she even tried to speak anything.

Luckily for her, you decide to give her a few moments of peace. As soon as the settings were back to its lowest, she takes another long gulp, with deep breaths, too.

“I’m all good, really. Just tired from walking around so much.” It’s all she manages to say, avoiding Ningning’s lingering touches.

“We should get you to the doctor, perhaps.” Giselle suggests. Her eyes, however, are not focused on Winter. Her attention is all on you, instead. Her gaze is so strong you turn your head away, looking everywhere but to your best friend.

“No! No, there’s no need for that.” Winter gesticulates, nodding and moving her upper body as much as she’s able to without getting the toy to budge. She tries her best to prove to her friends she was indeed ok. “Really, I’m sure it’ll pass once the food c-comes fuck.” Winter stands up abruptly, leaning on her arms to lift herself up as her legs felt like pure jelly. “Nervermind. I j-just have to use the restroom real quick. If you’ll excuse me.”

So, Winter leaves, without waiting for an answer. Almost instantly, you get up too, setting your napkin aside in a calming motion.

“I’ll go help her, girls. Don’t worry.” They all nod, their features completely diverting from one another; while Karina is frowning, Ning keeps alternating her looks into you and the hallway Winter has just disappeared into, torn between letting you handle the situation or stepping up and helping her unnie herself, and Giselle… Giselle has a blank expression, the engines running inside her mind.

Her long nails tap the wooden table in a steady rhythm, staring at your back as you leave them be, walking into the restroom to meet your bandmate. You make sure to lock the door once you get inside, too.

The room is exquisite, a perfect portrait of the whole establishment; embroiled with white and red, the adornments are carefully thought to have the room give off a harmonious, eloquent vibe. You don’t pay much attention to it, though. Instead, your gaze is focused on the girl in front of you, the one who’s gripping the sink with too much strength.

“Are you unwell, unnie? How can I help you?” You ask her, playfully.

Winter stares at you thought the mirror, as you approach her. Her teeth are clenched, her clothes are nibbled and her looks hold fire in them. You’re certain she could kill someone with such thing as a stare if she wanted to.

She opens her mouth, ready to throw a world of curses at you, but stops herself once you motion to your phone, now placing her vibrator at a particularly high setting.

“I’d keep some of those pretty thoughts of yours inside your head, if you’d like to cum just now.”

She’s smart, insufferably so, and you get the proof of it as soon as your words leave your mouth. Quickly, Winter’s defiant stare is gone, and she’s all pliable in your embrace, instead. She’s a whiny little mess, rubbing her teeth on your neck, licking and sucking it just slightly— though not enough to bruise.

“Let me cum, Y/n? Please? I really think I might explode.” She pleads, looking at you with her best puppy eyes. “I need it s-so bad, I swear I’ll fucking do anything, ‘promise.”

You smile at her change of attitude, nodding as you take the vibrator out of her cunt in one, swift motion, replacing it with your fingers. Your thumb works on her clit, applying just the right amount of pressure on it. Finally, you allow her to get the relief she so desperately wants.

“You can cum now, darling. Do it, then.”

The permission is all Winter needs to explode, her body throbbing as she feels so full of pleasure, with fireworks dangling from her skin into every possible part of her body. It’s so good, and she feels so complete it becomes difficult to breathe— the overwhelming sensations enough to make her shiver. She bites on your neck, then; just a single one, to keep her from screaming like she wanted to. You hold her through her orgasm, your strong arms helping to ride her through it as you whisper sweet praises in her ear. You’re proud of Winter.

You lose count of how many minutes you wait, making sure her breaths are even and stable to release her from your hold.

“You did excellent, holding up the whole time. Didn’t even let a single whimper out, in front of the girls. You took it so good, Winter…. Truly perfect.” You smirk, giving Winter’s tiny waist a reassuring squeeze. She hides her face in embarrassment, humming curses at you, but you can tell she’s delighted, too.

Grabbing her by the hips, you gently put her up on the marble. It’s an easy task, with her being so small, but the way your palms nearly circle her entire waist is enough for her face to get all flustered, once again.

Your low tone soothes Winter, who leans her head back as she feels your soft hands between her thighs, cleaning you up with paper the best you can, careful to not touch her most sensitive areas. The ghost of your fingers are enough to make her twitch, though, as much as she tries not to. Her responsiveness lets a laugh out of you, and you kiss the insides of her thighs, looking up at Winter with a reassuring smile.

“Stop saying it like that.” She murmurs, biting her bruised lip. Her hands run through her hair, just for the sake of having something to occupy herself with.

You smirk, throwing the paper away as you turn, taking a proper look at the beautiful, messy state she is. Still knelt between her thighs, you massage her thighs, palming them in big, circling motions.

“Like what?” You smirk, feigning innocence. Winter slaps you, playfully, and you shake your head, helping her to get down.

“Let’s go. The girls must be worried.” She says, trying to guide you out.

You stop her, gently grabbing her by the elbows.

“Are you really ok, though?” You ask, scanning her. “It’s ok if you still want some more time to gather yourself before going out, again. I can totally come up with something to fool them, or I don’t know—.”

Winter shakes her head, shifting her weight from one leg to the other. She’s shy, suddenly, as she answers, “I’m completely fine, I swear! Actually, I liked it a l-lot.”

You sigh, relieved. “Ok, ok. But if you feel otherwise, tell me. Deal?”

“Deal.” Your bandmate assures you, reaching out for the door. Before you can leave, she calls for you, quietly, “Y/n?”

You hum, staring at her still-flustered face. “Thank you, you know. For… all of that.” Winter says, giving vou a faint smile.

“Don’t stress about it, unnie.” You smile, nudging her. “It’s what friends do, right?”

Winter laughs, not believing your words.

“Sure. That’s what friends do.”

#sol writes #aespa x yn #aespa x you #aespa x reader #aespa x fem reader #aespa smut #aespa winter #kpop x reader #kpop smut #kpop x y/n #kpop x you #winter x reader #kim minjeong x yn #kim minjeong smut #kim minjeong x reader #kim winter #winter smut

[sunfyresrider]

♡My Dear, Don’t Ever Disappear | Neteyam S.

❦Summary: You wake up with a pounding headache and no clue where you are. It’s only after your cries for help your best friend appears. Except… it seems like he’s the reason for all of this.

❦Tags: Stalker!Neteyam - this man is actually crazy, muder🫢, porn w plot, dubcon/noncon, smutty af, kidnapping, pet names, biting, bondage, knifeplay, he loves you in a insane way. Word Count: 3k +

❦Author’s Note: NO PROOFREADING WE RAWDOG THIS! The voices got to me and I made this. Ooc Neteyam for mf sure but it’s just- ugh. My brain couldn’t stop thinking abt it<3

You woke up groggy, the first time you noticed was a severe ache in the back of your skull. What the hell happened? You opened your eyes to find you were not at home, nor in a hospital, you were in a cold concrete room. It had to be the old lab, a basement you hadn’t found yet. Well, that is unspeakably unsettling, you thought to yourself as your heart picked up its pace.

You winced as you tried to sit up, Your whole body was a dull throb, your arms stiff from their position. It took mere moments before you felt the cool touch of metal against your wrists, you tried to move away, but the sounds of chains clinking together gave away that they were keeping you on the floor. Panic slowly begun settling in the pits of your stomach, a looming sense of dread washing over you.

You were just going to work, walking out of base camp, and then nothing. Nothing at all. Trying to remember made your head pound, you didn't know what day it was, the fucking time, or if you were even in the same village. “Hello?”

Your voice echoed against the walls, the only response being the drip drop of water leaking through the walls, you were underground. That much you could tell. As your eyes adjusted to the dim light you noticed another presence, a figure standing at the door with their arms crossed.

“Boo.”

Your body jolted upwards, the chains pulling you back. You felt your blood go cold. They were tall, so tall you could hardly see all of them. You felt like the breath had been knocked out of your lungs, your mouth was dry and you could only stutter as he stepped forward. “No, no, no, no,” you mumbled to yourself, as he crouched down in front of you.

“Don’t fucking touch me! Somebody help! Help,” you screamed at the top of your lungs, the man didn't seem perturbed at all by your cries. “My Ewya, you’re loud,” he reached up, pulling the sloppily fashioned skull mask from his face. “Neteyam?!” You were baffled. Why was Neteyam here? This wasn’t some sick joke was it?

“Thank god you’re awake,” he sighed, his hand moving to push your hair out of your face. His fingers brushed against the gash on your forehead, causing you to wince. “I thought I hit your pretty little head too hard and put you in a coma.” His fingers trailed down the side of your face, his thumb swiping against your bottom lip, and you couldn't help but recoil. There was something different about him, he wasn't the same Neteyam that was so sweet to you.

“Neteyam what the fuck are you-” you were cut off by his voice, a crazed smile spreading across his face. “Surprise!” He yelled, throwing his hands up, he seemed ecstatic, and you had never felt more terrified. “I really wanted to do this differently, honestly, but it was so hard to get you alone.”

You could only stare, not wanting to say a word, the silence making your throat tighten. Neteyam looked down, his fingers tapping on his knees. You had never seen him like this before, his normal cheery and kind nature completely gone.“I-if Kyle finds out-”

Neteyam’s change in expression cut you off quickly, his eyes changing into something dark, his brow furrowing as his lip curled into a snarl. You swallowed thickly, not sure how to handle him, or the situation. “And what the fuck will a human named Kyle do to me? For Ewya’s sake I do not understand your obsession with this creature. He is weak, frail, short, pale skinned and so stupid.”

For just a moment you had a mere second to think and you were insulted on Kyle’s behalf. Yes, he wasn’t as tall as Neteyam or buff or particularly attractive but he was human. Neteyam huffed, his hand reaching up to pull your face towards him.

You were pulled back into reality as his fingers touched you, you were so pathetically helpless, chained to the ground, and at his mercy. His thumb rubbed along your cheek, and his eyes narrowed on yours. “It’s doesn’t matter now, yawne. I took care of him.”

Your blood ran cold, a sudden fear that he was speaking the truth, It made you want to vomit, a horrible pit forming in your stomach. But the way he said it, like he was proud of his actions, the look in his eyes as he stared down at you, it all made your heart drop. “You’re insane!”

“Only for you,” his smile reached both ears, a look that made the hair on the back of your neck stand on end. Your heart beat wildly in your chest, and your eyes started to water, your brain running a million miles a minute trying to come up with a solution, but nothing came. Neteyam leaned down, placing a kiss against your forehead.

It was… Oddly comforting, unnervingly soft. The way his lips felt against your skin was a stark contrast to his behavior, it was almost loving. “you’re so pretty when you cry, yawne,” his breath was hot on your skin, his voice soft, and it made your skin crawl.

“Fuck you, Neteyam.” You tried to turn away, but his grip tightened on your jaw, keeping you firmly in place, the chains digging into your wrists. You didn't want to look at him, and you certainly didn't want him looking at you. “You’ve read my mind, pretty.” You tried to squirm, and pull away, the chains biting into your skin and cutting into the delicate flesh. Your hands were numb from being locked in place, the muscles tensing and relaxing with the blood circulation.

“I really wish we could have done this in a nicer way… but you are so hardheaded. I was so nice, I did everything in the world to impress you... and not once did you notice me.” Neteyam unsheathed a blade you didn’t realize he was carrying, the metal glistening in the dim light. You felt tears well up in the corners of your eyes, the sight of it alone making your stomach flip, a knot forming deep within you.

The chains rattled as you squirmed, his grip tight on your chin. The metal slid across the delicate flesh of your jaw, it was cold to the touch and sent endless shivers down your spine. Neteyam traced his way down your neck, slowly running down your chest, stopping just before he reached your top. “I’ve dreamt of this for so long… of you, without these ugly human clothes, beneath me, whimpering and crying, of me, inside you... of you saying my name.”

A new feeling began creeping into your thoughts, it wasn't fear or panic, but something else entirely. His words, his voice, everything was too much, and it was beginning to make your head spin. Neteyam moved it slowly, slicing the fabric from the front of your chest, the knife easily cutting through the fabric of your blouse and bra. You didn't notice the cold air hitting the exposed skin, and all you could think of was his dagger as it trailed down your abdomen.

He let out a guttural growl as he stared down at you, his eyes transforming into something more animalistic. “You’re so perfect. I should have killed Kyle sooner…” Your core began to warm, a heat growing deep within your belly as his eyes roamed over your body, a new wave of shame and humiliation washing over you. This was turning you on, which was completely repulsive considering the situation.

Neteyam slid the knife along the inner part of your thigh, the sharp edge scraping against the supple skin, making you gasp. He took his time cutting the fabric, his movements precise, and careful, his gaze focused on the task at hand. Neteyam let out a sort of chuckle, pausing his movements as he gazed up at you, a curious look in his eye. “You like this don’t you?”

The next words came out as a stuttered, incoherent mess of denial. “N-no- you’re c-crazy! I hate you.” His blade sliced the thin string of fabric between your legs, cutting the material with ease. “Don’t lie to me, pet. I can smell you.” You bit your lip, not daring to make eye contact. The blade pressed against the inside of your thighs, dangerously close to your heat, and you felt your legs twitch.

You didn't understand this, the way the knife made your pulse race, the way his fingers danced across your skin made you burn. His hand moved slowly, the blade pressed against your skin, the metal cool against your warmth. You felt the knife drag, and you bit down harder on your lip, trying not to show any sort of reaction, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.

Neteyam moved the knife upward, dragging the metal against your gaped lips, the smoothness of the blade making your core tighten. Your mind was swimming, unable to concentrate, the blade was pressing harder, the sharp point breaking the delicate skin. A drop of blood seeped through, and Neteyam's eyes seemed to glow, his mouth hung open slightly.

Neteyam dropped the blade, the clatter echoing through the small room, his lips reaching out to touch the wound, a small red spot where the knife had been pressed. If there was any blood, it was washed away as his tongue lashed out, cleaning the area with long, slow movements.

Your mouth opened slightly, and a small whine escaped. Neteyam chuckled into your mouth, his hand snaking up your body to grasp at your throat. You couldn't help but moan softly, as his grip tightened around your windpipe, constricting your airways.

“You’re an ass,” you hissed, his hand loosening. You had a feeling the knife had been a trick, the way he had played it up and teased, the way he had made you feel. It wasn't a true threat, and he knew it. “Oh, you don’t want to play nice anymore? He pulled the chains that binged your wrists to the wall, yanking you out of position with a yelp. Neteyam pulled you so your face was mere inches from his, “ I see you, pet. I can be meaner, hm?"

You realized in this moment how his strength truly outmatched yours, his arms easily forcing you onto the ground. You tried to pull away, the cold floor biting at the bare skin of your back. Neteyam leaned down, forcing his mouth onto yours,his tongue slipping past your lips and into your mouth. You couldn't help but let out a muffled groan, the taste of blood lingering on his tongue.

His hands groped at the bare skin of your hips, his touch sending waves of heat throughout your body. He kissed you with an urgency, like he was starving for it, his teeth tugging on your lip. The sensation made a low groan slip past your lips, and his lips curled into a wicked smile. Neteyam’s tongue slipped out of your mouth, moving down your neck, his sharp teeth nibbling at your skin.

You felt your body begin to react, your blood pulsing, your chest heaving with each labored breath. It was disgusting, and humiliating. You were completely under his control, and you could do nothing about it. You could only watch as his hands wandered, as he moved his tongue down the front of your chest, the feeling of his dangling braids tickling your flesh. And for some reason, not even ewya could explain, you were enjoying it.

His lips wrapped around one of your breasts, his hot tongue gliding over the flesh. You threw your head back, moaning softly, his tongue flicking over the sensitive tip, his teeth lightly nibbling at the sensitive skin. Neteyam let out a deep groan, his mouth closing over it. You were so absorbed in what his tongue was doing to you, you failed to notice his hand slipping between your thighs.

You let out a strangled moan, as his long fingers brushed against your dripping folds. Your eyes snapped open, the sensation was so foreign. He slid a finger inside, pumping it slowly, his thumb circling around the sensitive bud. It felt incredible, and you hated that, the pleasure washing over you.

You could hear Neteyam let out a chuckle, the sound vibrating through his lips. "Look how wet you are, pet." He began forcing in another finger, stretching you out and filling you with a burning heat. You felt your eyes roll back, letting out a soft mewl, the sound of him thrusting into you echoed through the room.

"M-more, please," you begged, his fingers moving faster, the feeling overwhelming, making you squirm. "Please, more," you panted, your pussy beginning to clench around his fingers. “Beg louder.” Neteyam's hand gripped tighter around your neck, his fingers forcing themselves deeper, stretching you.

You could feel a coil building up inside, the sensation was too much, and you were so close. “Splease, Sso good,” you slurred. Neteyam proded at the spongy spot inside you, making the coil tighten further, your walls starting to quiver around him. “P-please! Teyam please!”

Neteyam pulled his fingers out suddenly, your orgasm being cut off immediately. You let out a loud whine, a pitiful plea to keep going, his fingers leaving a trail of your own slick as they moved up. Then, he slapped you clean across the face.The sound echoed through the room, and you felt your whole body tense up. The force of the impact was surprising, and it was quickly followed by a painful stinging.

"You thought I was going to let you cum so easily? After the attitude you’ve had all night? No way, brat, I’m going to ruin you first." Neteyam was so calm, his voice so collected, it was almost unnerving. You were stunned, obscenely horny, and mildly terrified of the monster in front of you.

He sat back, admiring his handiwork. You were spread out, bound, and completely nude. Your eyes met his, and a dark laugh bubbled up in his throat. "you should see yourself," he cooed. “You look so pretty all disheveled for me.”

Neteyam leaned forward, his long, deft fingers wrapping around your throat, forcing you up, the chains chafing the delicate skin. His mouth connected with yours, the kiss more heated than the others, his teeth tugging at your bottom lip. You could feel his excitement through his loincloth, the heat radiating off of him, his length straining against the fabric.

The sudden shift in emotions made you dizzy, his touch becoming rough, and violent. Then twisting into slow and sensual, the way his tongue gilded against yours, the way his lips moved expertly against yours, the way his hands moved along your body. "I'm going to mark the fuck out of you so no man ever comes near you again.”

Neteyam grasped at your hips, proving his superior strength by flipping you over with ease. One of his large hands wrapped into your hair, the other pulling your ass up so you could feel him. He was undeniably huge, so thick, and in no way was he going to fit inside you. The sensation alone made you whimper, and it only got worse as he rubbed himself against you.

The sound of him unfastening his cloth, the jingling of his jewelry was enough to make your core tighten. His cock slipped between your folds, the head rubbing against your clit. Neteyam let out a low growl, the feeling of him making you shudder, his hands gripping the back of your neck.

Neteyam forced himself inside of you, the sudden intrusion making you scream out, and tears well up in the corners of your eyes. He was impossibly big, filling you entirely, stretching you. You let out a series of broken moans, as he slid out only to thrust back inside. Neteyam's free hand slid down your spine, his fingers gently caressing your back, before he slapped your ass.

“That’s it, baby. Keep screaming my name just like that.” Neteyam's voice was strained, the words coming out like a hiss. His grip tightened on the base of your neck, holding you firmly in place, while his hips pounded against you. The sounds of his body hitting yours echoed through the room, his cock stretching you with each thrust.

He wasn't going easy, "F-fuck me!” you cried out, as his cock grazed your g-spot. Neteyam dropped his head into the crook of your neck, his teeth leaving an imprint, his hands holding you down, his body flush against you.

The knot began to build once more, and Neteyam picked up his pace, fucking into you with reckless abandon. You moaned and whimpered, unable to stop the obscene noises that fell from your lips. His heavy panting sent chills down your spine.

Neteyam let out a deep, animalistic growl, his nails digging into the soft flesh of your hips, his teeth biting into your shoulder. "You feel so good around me, baby.” His cock throbbed inside you, his tip pounded at your cervix. You felt your pussy clamp around him, the feeling making Neteyam's hips jerk, and you let out a loud, pleasured wail.

You were so close, and the knot in your belly was tightening. “Please can I cum?!” You yelled out. Neteyam pulled himself from the warmth of your body, and you could hear his breathing turn ragged. “No no no, I have to see you.”

You didn't have to wait long, Neteyam flipped you onto your back, and his lips met yours. You felt his cock press against your folds, the head of him pushing past the entrance. His lips attached themselves to the side of your neck, his hands sliding up your chest to wrap around your throat.

Neteyam's hips met yours, his cock pounding inside you, “keep begging, yawne.” His long fingers moved to circle your clit, his thumb rolling the sensitive nub, making your eyes roll back. “Please, Neteyam,” you cried, “sgood, please can I cum!”

"Are you going to be a good little girl from now on?" Neteyam hissed, his fingers moving faster. You nodded, as you let out a low cry, "y-yes! P please, I’ll be good! You were on the verge of tears, your mind clouded. Neteyam let out a guttural groan, his pace picking up but his movements getting progressively sloppy.

Your legs began to shake, the knot was beginning to unravel. Neteyam's cock throbbed inside you, and you knew he was getting close too. "i-im gonna-" His fingers curled around your throat, stopping your sentence. “Cum on this dick like a good pet.”

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, your body started to convulse, your muscles tensing, and then unraveling. Your orgasm ripped through you, causing you to thrash, and scream. You felt your pussy clench tightly around his length, the euphoria making your mind hazy. Neteyam's body trembled, his cock twitching as he spilled inside you. His seed filled you entirely, warming your belly, and dripping out onto your thighs as he pulled out slowly.

You were spent, too weak to move and too dazed to think straight. Time passed fast, the loss of his body heat lost in your head. You felt him shift beside you, his head dangling over yours as he peppered kisses onto your face. “You’re so pretty all fucked out…” he cooed, his hand gently rubbing your head.

You murmured something in reply, not fully hearing what he was saying. “I’m so happy you’re here with me, yawne.”Neteyam spoke, his voice soft. You heard his voice echo through the room, the words becoming jumbled as sleep overtook you. He continued petting your hair, watching you sleep peacefully. This was nice, harder than he expected, but it was nice.

“And you’re going to be here with me forever…”

My beloveds - @xylianasblog @strongheartneteyam @criticallybella

#neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan #neteyam sully #neteyam x avatar!reader #neteyam x f!reader #neteyam x reader #neteyam x you #neteyam x y/n #neteyam smut #neteyam fic #neteyam fanfiction #atwow smut #atwow fic #atwow x reader

[lightyaoigami]

hi, monica. i trust your taste because i love your writing. what are your favorite niche lawlight fics? (that is, stuff you've read that not many people in the fandom would know.)

hope that you're having a good break and come back to fic refreshed (of course, if you want to). <3 your readers won't go anywhere.

hi wow what a sweet and touching message to receive ;_;

i don't know what counts as niche tbh i will just recommend some here that i don't necessarily see as often as like idk tithe to hell or those. this is in no particular order. i actually forgot to add the ratings to the list below so just be mindful of that if that's something important to you!

the primrose path by tsukinousagi: 1.5k, a beautifully done elizabethan au inspired by hamlet. as you guys probably know i am a hamlet freak and this is laser-targeted to me, the guy who has had the username theprinceofdenmark for 15 years.

summa cum laude by whydoeseverythinghappensomuch: 13k, an incredibly atmospheric college au. reminds me so much of the secret history that it makes me want to chew my own fingers off.

tear you open live inside you by anonymous: 3k, mind the tags. excellent, super in-character blood and gore. consensual but not safe or sane. you get it.

unkissed for a million days by anivhee: 1.7k, this is after L dies but it's still lawlight. it's unhappy but i liked it even as a lawlight freak and fix-it enjoyer.

what i meant to say by booklovertwilight: 6.6k, a paratext collection of light's letters to L after his death.

twenty-three by haydonjames17: 4.7k, an utterly devastating birthday for light after L's death. i'm sensing a theme in my favorites here clearly i need help of some kind.

fifteen stories down by the-night-gods-moon: 7k, this is the closest i'll get to enjoying whump. the boys get stuck in rubble after a building explosion. this fic is profoundly underrated.

our little secret by avoidfilledwithcelluloid: 3k, i actually cannot describe this one it's so good and quite unique! it's a fresh way of writing their antagonism.

hear no evil by sharptoothed: 4.5k, so few people understand how to write misa in a lawlight context but isa nails it. it's also hot so sue me.

i know the way it ends before it's even begun by halfpromise: 15k, a side story to THE death note fic of all time, those. i am deeply biased because i got a shout-out in the dedication but this fic absolutely never fails to make me tear up. it's beautifully written, moving without being trite, and is as close to a happy ending as those!lawlight will ever get.

anyway. this is but a small sample of lawlight fics that make me insane and unwell. this was a very very nice ask to receive i am genuinely moved and i literally didn't know that anyone even noticed i was on hiatus. <3

#anon #lawlight #death note #dn fic rec

[chiyoso]

original pin

hi pookie. to those who read this the first time, welcome back, to the first time reading this. this is a re-write. an update. i kinda found the initial update i did rushed, not clearly descriptive of my situation outside this writing hobby of mine. also for the ones that i tagged, i have notes for you <3 (sorry for the tag 🫶🏻)

alright. hello hello. i'm chiyo, a jjk-focused/sporadic genshin and hsr fanfic writer, and you've caught me, and this blog in such bad time, and im so, so very fucking burnt out.

writing for me should be fun, stress relieving, and that goes for any other hobby i have. i have been told and supported countless of times to take a rest, to take a break from this, but my stubborn ass continues to try and get something out, anything to keep my blog alive, hells, it feels like a toxic relationship where i keep coming back, because i remember all the fun, happy and fond times i had in this app, only then to return to why it becomes draining, exhausting.

just sat there, occasionally laid on my back, using my phone, but with unmoving thumbs, with a brain lacking the world that needs the narrative to make a story, fuck, where has it gone?

that innocent, startup of mine, the newfound love and interest for that world of fiction that you all create. dude, i remember being so happy discovering that this brain of mine can conjure up so many shit, all because of your words, it's fucking amazing. hence, the start of the era of my honkai star rail writing journey. (hsr/hi3rd fans who followed me, i let you down with my jujutsu kaisen brainrot obsession im sorry lmao)

“take a break hira,” “take a break chiyo,” “please, take a break.”

i've heard it all, and with utmost love and respect, thank you.

thank you for everything, every word, every action, and every peep of interest you all had for me. small and big creators, who, stopped by because of my small percent chance drop in on their feed, because of the stories i created that you shared, i've met so many wonderful, inspring and motivating people in tumblr, fuck, i didn't expect to crrate a little community all by myself, with my grit alone, it's so rewarding for someone who strives for perfection, for someone who struggles with her mental health daily, for someone who deluded themselves in a world of fiction, I can't express my genuine gratitude enough.

i'm not quitting. maybe i should've mentionrd that earlier to prevent you from getting rattled, but continuing off, i don't find myself quitting this writing journey, maybe i'm just not in the right mental headspace for it at this time. damn, my ex really fucked me up LMAO.

right, i'm aware of the less and lessening interactions i've had with the people i've encountered throughout tumblr, i feel sick of myself for not being able to catch up, nor interact with any of you as much as i could anymore, it really, really fucking sucks, i hate it, i hate it, i do.

i still have leftover projects to go over and publish, because i still want MY ideas, MY thoughts, MY worlds of fictional prowess to all of you. i'm not done, but i will say, that i'm- i'm so incredibly, so very sorry to the ones that were highly, to the heavens, expecting greatness from me, to the ones who were anticipating my unfinished stories, fuck, there's so much to do, yet my body, my mind, they do not respond, as if i'm losing my sense of time, literally.

all i can say to those sticking with me because of their plain interest for me, i wish, i pray, i'll beg, beg for me, my soul, my mind, my body, my spirit to heal, and heal faster, so i can love you all at my 100%, not with my trying 20%, and lower.

thank you. to the old, and to the recent supporters that got me to 3k followers and counting, fuckin' wild. actually insane.

i'll continue to write. i'll continue to create. i don't want to quit.

i don't want to leave the only thing that gave me freedom, and the genuine happiness the first time, making me discover shit about myself, and there's that.

p.s. apologies for my jjk brainrot everyone who followed for genshin and hsr <3 also that one popular otome game, love & deepspace? yeah, that shit's also fucking me up so good.

HONORABLE MENTIONS: (lawd i feel bad for tagging)

@ainescribe @wanderingconstellations @teapartyspilled @v3lv3tf0x @ciarchivez ⸻ you fucking OGS. literally five pillars of my life, the cheerleaders, my absolute undying support of this blog, you saw me at my noob tumblr handling form, the lows, the highs, and the absolute peaks, i consider all of you special, i do, you all made tumblr and the writing community such a fun place for me. thank you, thank you, i just can't spam that voiceline enough.

@peachdues @screampied @chuluoyi @blkkizzat @jabamin @flametrashira @meowzfordayz ⸻ you superstar mutuals of mine. we've only interacted sporadically, PLEASE BLAME MY BURNOUT AND COLLEGE SCHEDULE FOR THAT, but all of you invoked so much burning hope, and motivation for me through your stories, AND your interests for me, whether it'd be something about my themes, edits, stories, it doesn't matter, you all took interest in lil' ol me, despite what, being such big content creators? FUCK??? that's insane. thank you.

god, i seriously wish my schedule would just clear up by a fuckton, and then again, i was the one who took psychology and performing arts 💤 i hope, hope HOPE i get to interact with you all again once i take a leave/break from college.

⸻ with all my love, chiyo.

#real shit i think i just need dick #that or a love so overwhelming from a person that theyll die for me cos id do the same

[bro-atz]

the first blow

in which: jinsik has much to learn (wink wonk)

pair: idol!jinsik/gn!reader

word count: 3.2k

content: smut, oral sex, imma be real this is just one bj yes 3k words for one bj i'm insane let's move on, whimpering moaning groaning whining crying jinsik makes all the noises you can possibly imagine, completely consensual!

author's note: happy bday to the jinsik to my seeun @eyeryis we discussed this concept in great length so i hope this is what you were envisioning <3 also the title is so cringe but pls give me a break i just got nothin left in the tank

tag list: @eyeryis apply for the permanent taglist here! part one | part two

Jinsik was always a mess when it came to you. The first time the two of you ever met, he blurted out that he fell for you hard— love at first sight. But, you liked that he was flustered like that. You thought it was cute— you thought he was cute. Super cute. So, you took his confession, and the two of you started (secretly) dating. Well, the other members found out within two months because Jinsik wasn’t the best at keeping you a secret, but the fans didn’t know, nor did they need to.

You would usually hang out at their dorm whenever you knew most of them had schedules and Jinsik did not. Whoever also didn’t have a schedule would still leave and give you and Jinsik time to be alone peacefully. Very thoughtful of them, but they didn’t really need to worry about anything because you and Jinsik were vanilla— extremely vanilla. He didn’t even start kissing you passionately until six months into your relationship. You were taking things very slow, but you went at his pace because he was the one with the demanding career. You? Not so much.

One night, Jinsik told Minjae he wanted to watch a movie with you at the dorm, so Minjae took the rest of the members out to watch a movie but in a theater, leaving the entire dorm just for you and Jinsik. Minjae thought it was going to be a little more than just the movie, but you and Jinsik were simply going to watch a movie and that’s it. Or so you thought.

“A Gentleman’s Dignity? I thought we were watching a movie,” you questioned your boyfriend. “Also, don’t you think we’re a little too young to watch this?”

“What’s wrong with it? It’s not rated R or anything,” Jinsik frowned, his cute pout making your heart swell with love.

“No, I know, but… The actors are all in their 40s. Shouldn’t we watch something like True Beauty or Boys Over Flowers?”

“I mean… I guess we can…”

If your boyfriend had dog ears, they’d definitely be drooping by that point. You cupped his cheeks and left a light peck on his lips before saying, “I was just wondering, baby. You wanna watch A Gentleman’s Dignity? We can.”

“Are you sure? Will you enjoy it?”

“Of course I will. I always like and trust whatever you choose. You chose me, after all.”

Just like that, his mood lifted. He eagerly turned the K-drama on, the two of you sitting on the couch with a throw blanket barely covering the two of you. As the drama started, Jinsik immediately put his arm over your shoulder, and you snuggled into his comfy arms.

You could barely focus on the drama, though. Why? Jinsik, with the hand that wasn’t over your shoulder, slipped his hand to your thigh and rubbed it slowly. You didn’t know if he was consciously doing it or not, but regardless, it stirred something within you. Then, he kissed the top of your head. You looked up at him, surprise reflecting in your eyes. He met your gaze and smiled softly at you, your heart fluttering wildly in your chest. His hand moved from your thigh to your face, and cupping your cheek lightly, he left a soft kiss on your lips. You left a small kiss on his lips in response, and the two of you kept exchanging kisses that slowly intensified into a full string of passionate kisses.

His hand dropped from your face to your waist and pulled you in, the hand that was over your shoulder moving to your hair and burying his fingers there. You body slightly jolted when his warm fingertips slipped under your shirt to run along the curve of your bare waist. You couldn’t believe it; what on Earth was happening? What happened to your shy boy who didn’t go past soft gentle kisses? (Not that you were complaining but) why was he kissing you so hard that you felt your lower lip start to feel tender?

Here’s the thing: Jinsik held off for the longest time. He always got super turned on whenever you did the slightest thing sensual. For instance, you were in the dorm with him and a couple other members of xikers, and he had to nurse his erection when you merely ran your fingers through his hair and lightly massaged his scalp. And the reason why he held off was because he had yet to have his first time, and he didn’t want you to know that. He wanted to be confident and all-knowing in front of you, and having zero experience definitely did not make him feel confident nor all-knowing.

You were excited. You were so happy that he made the move because you had been waiting and wondering for so long that you forget sex was even a thing in romantic relationships. You placed your hand on his crotch and fondled it, massaged it over his pants, his dick getting bigger and firmer and pressing desperately against his pants.

Jinsik, meanwhile, was losing his mind. Between the kissing and the touching, he was slowly slipping away from sanity and his control over his body. He hiccuped slightly, but he didn’t even hear himself because his brain was screaming.

Oh my fuck. Oh my God. Oh my fucking God.

You were loving his reactions to you because it made you think he was just as pent up as you. Technically, he was, but it was more than that because he had never done this before.

The two of you leaned away from each other, and you noticed Jinsik’s face was fifty shades of flustered. He was panting lightly, and his eyes were beginning to glaze over from the pleasure of just you touching him over his clothes. He trembled and sharply inhaled when he felt you cradle his steadily hardening dick in your hand.

“Jinsik, baby?”

“Hngh— Y-yes, Y/N?”

“I wanna make you feel good.”

Jinsik, eyes trembling, asked in a whisper, “How?”

You smiled and leaned in to kiss him, Jinsik happily meeting you halfway. While you made out with him like the rowdy youngsters you were, you worked on unbuttoning and unzipping his pants, your fingers tugging lightly at the thick waistband of his briefs.

Jinsik was practically vibrating at that point. His mind was melting. He cupped your face as an attempt to keep his shit together, to maintain his confidence, while his other hand gripped the sofa cushion so hard that his knuckles were turning white. A little moan left his lips while he kissed you when he felt you stroke his dick lightly, your gentle hands driving him oh so fucking insane to the point where he was trying think about literally anything else to prevent himself from cumming so fast.

By the time you stopped kissing and moved down on him, he was completely shivering and his eyes were blurry with tears and lust. You kneeled before him in between his spread legs— you were going to suck him off (he didn’t need years of experience for him to figure that out).

Then, it suddenly hit him. He had to tell you about his inexperience. He didn’t want to lie to you about this because what if he did something stupid, and then you think he’s an idiot? If you knew that he didn’t know shit about sex, then any mistake he made would be excused. But, if he’s supposed to be a seasoned, real man (aka not a virgin), he’s supposed to know better.

His braincells were bouncing around in his head while you, on the other hand, were just completely enamored with his dick. It was so pretty— it was perfectly straight, just the right girth, just the right length— your boyfriend had the model penis, and you were seriously thirsting for it. You held his dick somewhat firmly and were about to take him into your mouth when he stopped you by slipping his hand under your jaw.

“Y/N, wait, I…” Jinsik pressed his lips together and squeezed his eyes shut when he saw you looking up at him with big, beautiful eyes because that view also excited him too much. After taking a little breath, he met your gaze again and said in the smallest voice, “I gotta tell you something.”

“Yeah…?” you eyed him, suddenly worrying about whether or not he had an STD.

“I’ve never done this before…”

“What do you mean?”

“This… This is, um, my first time…” Jinsik’s voice faded as he said the last two words, but you heard him.

“Your first time for…?”

“All of it. Everything.”

When you did nothing but stare at him with wide eyes, Jinsik immediately regretted telling you the truth. Fuck, he messed up and now he was going to die of embarrassment. But, you were shocked at the revelation because it explained so much of his behavior previously in your relationship. You hummed lightly as you thought about what to say to him to calm the poor boy down.

“So,” you started softly while stroking his dick lightly. “Does that mean I’m your first?”

Jinsik blinked a couple times, confused on where the conversation was going. “Yes,” he answered after a heartbeat or two.

You couldn’t help but smile upon receiving the information. You left a kiss on the length— making the boy tremble— and observed it while still dry rubbing. Keeping your eyes down, you whispered, “…That kinda turns me on.”

Completely missing what you said because you were so quiet and the blood rushing through his body was too loud, Jinsik leaned in slightly, only to snap right back into his original position when drew circles on his tip lightly with your fingernails. Before he could let out some raunchy noise, he bit his lower lip— and of course, he had to bite his lip in the way that makes him look sexy because he had to save at least some face.

“We all have to start somewhere, and I’m grateful to be the one that shows you, Jinsik… But, I don’t want to push you into anything. So, if at any point you’re uncomfortable or scared and want to stop, just use the safe word: “Tricky”.”

“Why Tricky…?”

“Because I’ll think about Tricky, and I don’t wanna be thinking about Tricky while being intimate with you,” you couldn’t help but laugh, making Jinsik smile in the process.

“Oh… Okay.”

“Shall we get started?”

Lips quivering, Jinsik returned a small nod, and you started. You took just the tip of his dick into your mouth first, making a satisfying popping sound as you released. You lapped him up like a lollipop, Jinsik gasping sharply at the sensation. He didn’t know what to do with his hands at that point (his brain was so far gone that he didn’t know how to do anything), so he was holding onto the edge of the sofa cushions, the cushion completely flattened under his grasp.

When you stopped teasing him and started sucking for real, a good majority of his cock in your mouth, Jinsik let out a tiny, high squeak, making him immediately cover his mouth. His face was beet red. He hated that he was making all of these mortifying noises for you instead of something deeper like a long sigh, or a groan. He was trying to do that, but no, his body wanted to betray him instead.

You were absolutely obsessed with the noises he was making. Every whimper, whine, tiny moan, squeak, hiccup— whatever he did, you loved it for two reasons: one, you knew for a fact that he was enjoying it; two, it was so much better than some jock moaning lowly and growling about your mouth was made for him or some other shit like that. Jinsik was different; he was refreshing.

Every time you moved your head further towards his waist, you moaned and sighed— fuck, you were enjoying this too because, somehow, his cock tasted just as sweet as he was. Adding your hand to the mix, you blew Jinsik while also rubbing your hand in the same direction, occasionally pressing your fingers into his cock, squeezing it the tiniest bit.

“Mmm… Ah! Hmm-ngh,” Jinsik started vocalizing his pleasure, the noises leaving his mouth getting raunchier by the second, his voice still climbing higher in pitch.

And still, he was trying so hard to contain these noises of his. He bit his lower lip (and would release to take a desperate gasp for air every now and then), and squeezed his eyes shut, trying so so hard to hold off on cumming. But, having his eyes closed just enhanced the warmth of your mouth and the sensation of your hand, lips, and tongue pleasuring him greatly.

Keeping a slower, steady pace, you eyes flitted upwards to look at his reaction. God, the man was ethereal. He looked so fucking beautiful with his face flushed, lips red and sore, eyes closed and making his eyelashes look even more full and long. You could tell he was struggling to keep it together. His hands were all over the place, one hand eternally clutching the sofa cushion while running his fingers through his hair with the other one. You thought he didn’t know what to do with his hands.

Jinsik knew exactly what to do with his hands now. He knows how blowjobs work— he’d just never had one before. Honestly, he really wanted to run his fingers through your hair and hold your head while pushing you into him more, but he was too nervous. He didn’t want to do it wrong and hurt you.

“Mmm… Ahh… Oh, hmm, angh!” Jinsik whimpered out, the pleasure starting to overstimulate him.

You felt his cock quiver in his mouth— he was so close, but he was holding back, and he was holding back as much as he could; he didn’t want to cum so fast because that’s so mortifying. But, you were making it harder and harder to keep his shit together.

Jinsik moaned loudly when you went faster and closer to the base of his cock. Tears filled his eyes— you were sucking him, blowing him so fucking well that he could not hold back any longer.

No! Don’t do it! Don’t fucking cum yet! Resist! You haven’t even— Tricky! Think about Tricky!

There was no way in hell Jinsik was going to use the safe word, but thinking about Tricky did the trick (terrible pun…), and he was able to hold out for longer. That being said, he was still losing it, tilting his head up to the sky and trying to keep the tears in his eyes.

God, you loved seeing this side of Jinsik, and you wanted more. You wanted to see how he’d react to everything that someone could do during a blowjob— everything. So, you slurped. You fucking slurped him up to keep the saliva from dripping and to also provoke another long, sensual moan.

“Y-Y/N! Hnngh— Oh my— Ah! Oh my God, mmm aah! B-baby!” Jinsik managed to say in between moans and pants, sending a rush of excitement through your body.

You responded with a hum, sending him further into the stars.

“F-feels sooh good— haah!”

You looked up to see that Jinsik was still looking at the ceiling, still blinking tears out of his eyes, missing out on a gorgeous view of you blowing him into oblivion. You understood, but you also wanted his eyes on you. Releasing him with yet another satisfying ‘pop!’, you licked stripes along his red, throbbing, quivering penis. You reached for one of his hands and guided that one to the back of your head, your other hand lacing his fingers with yours.

Now that he was holding onto you, he brought his gaze down and looked at you right as you took him back into your mouth. God, you were so fucking hot kneeling before him while you pleasure the shit out of him— his mind was blown.

“Y/N, you… You’re so… This is fucking amazing.”

Blood immediately rushed to your head. Jinsik never swore— he never ever swore, so hearing the profanity leave his lips was actually insane. So, you took him in completely. Entirely. All the way until you gagged. You felt him clutch the roots of your hair, squeeze your fingers tight, and pant hard, moan hard; he was so close yet again.

“Baby, please it,” Jinsik’s loud gasp broke his sentence. “I can’t take it!”

His breathing hitched more frequently, and with every breath came a slight sob. You were a little worried, but when you looked up, he was definitely enjoying it.

“I-It’s too much!” He cried. “I can’t!

Ignoring his cries, you kept going. You wanted to make him cum. You wanted to make him cum so hard to make the long blow job so worth it.

He wanted to hold out just a little longer. Thankfully, you slowed down, trying to regain your breath and energy. His cries subdued to quiet moans— fuck, even his moans sound beautiful, like a fucking song— and was relieved that he could still hold on… Only for about two seconds though.

You blew Jinsik like there was no tomorrow. You sucked, slurped, gagged, moaned, exhaled loudly the faster and deeper you went. Jinsik went back to moaning loudly. He moaned your name over and over again, some profanities sprinkled in between, turning you the fuck on.

“Y-Y/N, baby, my l-love?” Jinsik whimpered out; he was about to burst. “Please, I’m— Ooh! Mmm, I’m— Fuck!— I wanna—”

Jinsik sharply inhaled. He pulled your hair gently (because he didn’t want to hurt you), desperately trying to move you before he came in your mouth. You, instead, moved your head all the way down, shoving his cock deep in you one last time, gagging on his length, hollowing your mouth, and slurping literally everything before surfacing for air. You were gasping and panting as several trails of saliva connected the head of his dick to your lips and tongue, the sight making his body flush with warmth.

You rubbed his cock quickly and said, “Don’t hold back anymore, baby. Cum for me.”

And that he does. Trails of white shot upwards then landed on his waist and thighs as he flung his head back and groaned so loudly that it echoed in the entire dorm. God, and he’s mortified because he just kept cumming like it built up in him because he held off for so long. Tears in his eyes, he look down to see the mess he made, his face so red that you thought it was going to burst into flames.

“Did you like that, baby?” you asked him while licking your fingers (some of his cum ended up on your hand).

“God…” he sighed out, his breathing back to normal. “That was amazing. You’re fucking amazing. Oh, wow…”

He leaned his head all the way back into the sofa, a giddy smile on his face. His first blowjob: fucking amazing.

#xikers #xikers jinsik #ham jinsik #jinsik smut #jinsik x reader #ham jinsik xikers #jinsik xikers #jinsik xikers smut #xikers jinsik smut #ham jinsik smut #broatz #bro <3 dave

[lveclouds]

↬ paring/characters: model! kwon soonyoung x biology major reader, other members may be mentioned/make appearances 

↬ genre/aus: heavy fluff, minimal angst (like seriously you’ll blink and then it’s gone), slight college/university au, established relationship, song au, non idol au, long distance relationship 

↬ summary: in which, whenever you’re with soonyoung, time seems to stop in its tracks. 

↬ ratings(s): pg15, nc17 (see warnings)

↬ tw: heavy swearing, mentions of alcohol/mild consumption (reader and hoshi get a bit tipsy), mentions of school related stress (very brief), the members are quite literally reader’s support system in this fic <3, mentions/description of a past relationship/ex, mentions of cheating (not between hoshi and reader) 

↬ wc: 3k

↬ note: hello loves! so, like a lot of my fics lately, the idea for it was yet another spur of the moment thing. the title of this fic comes from the song ‘7pm’ by bss (ft. peder elias), which is such a cute and soft song and it honestly makes my heart warm anytime i listen to it <3 its an instant serotonin booster. this song is also perfect for a late night drive or when the sun is starting to set. i highly recommend listening to this song while reading this :) also this fic is incredibiy cheesy/clichè, you’ve been warned <3 

if anyone had told you that college was going to be easy, you would’ve laughed in their face. no, college was anything but easy, with an overwhelming amount of assignments, emails, and deadlines, it was enough for any person to go insane. though, you supposed it wasn’t all too bad, as you had a solid support system in the form of kwon soonyoung, your boyfriend of three years. 

and, when he wasn’t around, your support system came in the form of twelve loud and chaotic guys that you adored dearly. you’d met choi seungcheol, kim mingyu, vernon, joshua, jun, minghao, seungkwan, dokyeom, woozi, wonwoo, chan, and, jeonghan during freshman orientation, and had it hit off fairly quickly with them, bonding over your favorite movies and music. 

they were also fiercely protective of you, especially after some asshole you’d dated your sophomore year had cheated on you with some random girl he’d run into at a bar. they had all been beyond pissed when you’d showed up to their apartment, eyes red-rimmed from crying and tears staining your cheeks. 

“give me that asshole’s address right now, so i can beat the shit out of him.” seungcheol had raged, pacing around their living room, the vein on his neck prominent. mingyu was not much better, mumbling expletives under his breath, jaw clenched so tightly you’d thought it hurt. seungkwan, minghao, and jun offered to slash his tires. “we would love to see the look on his face when he finds out that the tires of that shitty car he drives got slashed.” 

the others had voiced their agreement, threatening to make your ex’s life a living hell due to the way he had treated you. as much as you were happy that your friends really,truly, cared about you, you wouldn’t be able to stomach it if they got hurt or injured for your sake. 

“i appreciate it, guys, i really do, but i would never be able to forgive myself if any of you idiots got arrested or hurt because of me. besides, that asshole can rot in hell for all i care.” after that, they had all given you the best group hug ever, and all thoughts of your pathetic ex vanished. 

soonyoung was an up and coming model, and was usually out of the country for weeks at a time, months, even. he was always traveling for a photoshoot or to attend a fashion show. but, on the rare times that he was home, he would always make sure to spend all of his time with you. “i’m almost never here, and being away from you physically hurts, so, on the off chance that i am home, i have to make every moment count.” he had said during a late night trip to the convenience store. 

of course, you always missed sooyoung whenever he wasn’t around, but college and your friends kept you busy and distracted. for instance, wonwoo would take you to a local bookstore and you would bond over a love of classics and romance novels, spending hours upon hours browsing their selection. seungkwan, chan, and jeonghan would treat you to korean barbeque after a long day of classes, and, if you weren’t too exhausted, a karaoke session was never too far behind. 

your friends were always there to comfort and distract you whenever soonyoung was gone, and for that, you were forever grateful. wallowing and sulking around in your dorm room was something that your boyfriend would highly disapprove of. thus, you tried to always go out and keep yourself occupied, even if it was something as simple as buying groceries. 

this time, though, soonyoung was finally home for more than a few weeks, and you were over the moon. college became even more bearable, knowing that he wasn’t in some foreign country, a million miles away. your classes ran until late in the evening at times, and you would always tell soonyoung not to wait up for you if he was tired, but he always did. 

this evening had been no exception. your lab class had ran late yet again, and by the time you stumbled tiredly out of the science building, you were about ready to collapse. soonyoung had been waiting for you outside, resplendent even in a loose, white button down thrown over a black shirt, loose, light blue jeans, and black sneakers, raven hair adorably mussed. 

“hi love!” he had said in lieu of greeting, amber eyes practically lighting up. immediately, any exhaustation you had melted away, replaced with renewed energy. soonyoung had that effect on you, you supposed. “hi.” you murmured softly, heart warming as he took you into his arms, wrapping his strong arms around you, pulling you flush against his body. 

you had all but melted into the warmth and solidness of him, breathing in his cedar and musk scent that was almost comforting. you felt him press a soft kiss into your hair, and you let out a sigh of content, burying your face in the crook of his shoulder. “long day?” you nodded. “mmm, my lab class ran late again.” 

“i know you’re exhausted, and the last thing you probably want to do is to be out right now, but i was thinking we could go for a walk along the han river? we don’t have to if you you’re not up for it, just say the word and we’ll go to your dorm, no questions asked.” your heart warmed at this, soonyoung always took your feelings into consideration, which was something your past partner had never done. 

you shook your head. “i was exhausted at first, but honestly, the last thing i want to do is go back to my dorm.” soonyoung pulled back, but kept his arms around you, concern furrowing his brow. “are you sure?” he asked gently. “i’m sure. besides, a late night walk with you sounds romantic.” at that, your boyfriend rolled his eyes fondly. “of course it does.”

and so here you were, walking hand in hand with soonyoung, admiring how the moonlight cast silver shadows onto the smooth surface of the han river, letting the cool night breeze wash over you. it was peaceful and serene, even with the faint rumbles of car engines and light chatter filling the air. 

the streelamps cast golden shadows onto the smooth, concrete surface of the bridge you were walking on, adding even more to the tranquil atmosphere. a comfortable silence settled around you, and any feelings of stress or exhaustation you had had earlier completely vanished. they always seemed to, at least, whenever you were with soonyoung. 

“how have you been?” he asked after a while, the pad of his thumb making gentle circles on the back of your hand. “i’m doing okay, jeonghan and the others have been keeping me company when i’m not drowning in my coursework.” you joked, and immediately regretted it upon seeing the frown marring your boyfriend’s features. “i’m fine, love, i promise.” you reassured him, leaning up to press a soft kiss on his cheek, which lessened the tension in his shoulders a bit. “are you eating enough? are you taking care of yourself while i’m gone?” 

your heart ached at how worried he sounded. “i am, i promise, love. mingyu made me three weeks worth of food yesterday and dropped it off, insisting that he would never let a friend of his starve.” at that, soonyoung’s expression softened, the corner of his mouth curved into a small smile. “sounds like him.”

“are you sure you’re okay, though?” you nodded. “positive.” sooyoung exhaled softly, the sound more resigned than anything. “ok, i trust you, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?” “i know.” your boyfriend smiled, a real one this time, eyes crinkling at the corners. “good.” 

as you continued your walk, soonyoung chatted excitedly about the various cities he’d visited while modeling, even pulling out his phone at times to show you pictures of gorgeous landscapes and architecture, amber eyes lighting up like a kid at a candy store, the sight incredibly endearing. 

the late evening air was cool and crisp, a gentle gust of wind whispering through the trees and lifting your hair, brushing at your cheeks. these were the moments with soonyoung that you treasured the most, when it was just you and him, and you could forget about all the stress and worries in your life. 

and, as clichè as it was, time seemed to stand still whenever you were with soonyoung, and you could just focus on being with him, and nothing else mattered. “seungcheol hyung’s been telling me that one of your professors is giving you a hard time.” soonyoung was saying, snapping you out of your trance. 

you silently vowed to strangle your friend later for snitching. “he is, but it’s nothing i can’t handle.” the professor in question taught your biochem class, and was notorious for slamming his students with tight deadlines and hashed terrible grades out as if they were playing cards. your boyfriend chuckled softly, squeezing your hand gently. 

“ok, as long as you’re sure you don’t need me to beat his ass.” you snorted, nudging your boyfriend’s ribs gently with your elbow. “soonyoung, i love you, but you don’t have a violent bone in your body.” said male huffed. “i do.” “ok, ok, whatever helps you sleep at night.” 

he gave you a half-hearted glare, and you couldn’t help the amused laugh that spilled from your lips. “i appreciate you wanting to defend me, love, but we all know you wouldn’t hurt a fly.” “whatever.” he mumbled, bottom lip jutting out slightly in a pout, and you giggled, leaning in to press a gentle kiss onto his cheek. “it’s okay, i still love you regardless.” color rose to your boyfriend’s cheeks, staining them pink, and you fought the urge to coo at the sight. 

you and soonyoung made your way down the bridge, occasionally stopping to steal kisses and take photos, laughing at the goofy faces you made in some of them. you felt lighter than you had in weeks, glad to finally be able to let all your worries melt away, and just enjoy your boyfriend’s company. 

after a while, you finally admitted to your boyfriend that you were a bit hungry, as you hadn’t eaten since your lab started, which, as you expected, didn’t go over too well with him. “love, why didn’t you say anything earlier?” he asked, worry evident in his tone as he dragged you over to the nearest convenience store. 

“i-i didn’t want to bother you.” you mumbled, feeling tears prick the corner of your eyes. you hated making him worry and fuss over you, as it immediately made you feel guilty. suddenly, soonyoung stopped in his tracks, and before you could say anything else, you were wrapped in a warm and strong embrace, arms wrapping around your shoulders in a bear hug. 

you curled your arms around soonyoung’s back, pressing your hands into his shoulder blades, breathing in his familiar cedar and musk scent. soonyoung drew soothing circles on your back, and you felt him tuck your head underneath his chin. and, after weeks and weeks of bottling up your emotions, you finally let go, sobbing into the crook of soonyoung’s neck, clinging on to him like a lifeline. 

“i’m sorry,” you croaked, voice hoarse from crying, hastily wiping away your tears with the back of your hand. “i didn’t mean to ruin the mood.” your boyfriend scoffed, pulling back to look you in the eyes, but keeping his hands on your shoulders, his grip gentle but firm. “don’t apologize, love. and you didn’t ruin anything. i would rather you be honest with me than keep everything to yourself. you’re never a burden to me, love. ever.” 

god, you really didn’t deserve this wonderful, selfless, and caring man, not for one second. you let out a hoarse laugh, heart warming as your boyfriend wiped away a stray tear with the pad of his thumb, amber eyes soft. “i don’t deserve you.” you whispered, and soonyoung shook his head. “it’s the other way around, love.”

“can we please go get food now? i’m starving.” he laughed, the light in his eyes returning. “of course, love.” minutes later, you sat on a park bench alongside your boyfriend, practically inhaling a bowl of delicious, spicy ramen, vegetable kimbap, and downing a can of your favorite beer. the skyscrapers looked like tiny, glittering beacons of light from where you sat, casting shadows onto the tranquil surface of the river. 

“i’m glad we did this.” you said through a mouthful of kimbap, and soonyoung gave a noncommittal grunt in agreement, downing the rest of his beer, cheeks slightly flushed red. “thank you for letting me take you here, i didn’t want to force you, especially since you looked so drained from your lab today.” 

“you didn’t force me at all. besides, this is a nice distraction from all of the coursework waiting for me.” you murmured, finishing off the rest of your kimbap, wiping your mouth with a napkin. “oh,” soonyoung said, worry marring his features, “did you have something due tonight?” you shook your head, giving your boyfriend what you hoped was a reassuring smile. “no, don’t worry, the assignment’s due tomorrow. so, it can wait.” 

soonyoung’s shoulders relaxed a bit. “ok, good.” you let out a soft sigh of content, downing the rest of your beer and throwing it into the trash can next to you. then, you scooted closer to your boyfriend, who immediately wrapped an arm around your shoulders, and you smiled, resting your head on his broad shoulder. 

a comfortable silence settled over you, and you closed your eyes, a wave of peace washing over you. “going to close my eyes, just for a few minutes.” you mumbled, speech slurring a bit, and were vaguely aware of a pair of lips on your forehead before sleep took over. 

when you woke up, you were in a large, cozy bed, wrapped up in the warm, white sheets. the moonlight streamed in through the massive windows, bathing the room in silver. soonyoung was passed out next to you, chest rising up and down peacefully, dark hair adorably mussed, an arm wrapped securely around your waist. 

you smiled, and shifted so you were facing him, reaching out and brushing stray strands of hair from his forehead, causing him to stir a bit, eyes blinking open slowly. “love?” he whispered, voice heavy with sleep, and you leaned in to press a soft kiss to his mouth. “did i wake you?” 

soonyoung shook his head, and you smiled, snuggling deeper into him, burying your face in the soft cotton of his shirt, letting out a content sigh. “you know, i’ve never actually said this, but, time seems to stop whenever i’m with you.” you mumbled into his shirt, glad for the darkness of the room so he couldn’t see the blush forming on your face. 

soonyoung chuckled, carding a hand through your hair gently. “you’re so cute, so adorable.” he cooed, and you swatted at his chest playfully. “s-shut up.” “forget what i said.” “no can do love, once it’s out in the world, you can’t take it back. “if you tell mingyu or any of my friends about this, i will skin you alive.” “noted.” 

“c-can you sing me to sleep? i know that’s really cheesy, but-” “of course love, anything.” soonyoung said immediately, cutting you off abruptly. “any particular one in mind?” “no, surprise me.” you all but melted in your boyfriend’s arms, relishing in the warmth and familiarity of him, his comforting scent wrapping around you. 

a beat of silence, a deep breath, and then soonyoung began to sing. “meet on han river at 7pm, you and i must meet before the moon comes, our answer is right in front of our eyes. After a long, long, day, the two of us meet. one drink for a day tired of jokes, the night comes too soon. stop the time, be here with me.” his voice was soft yet melodic, and you allowed yourself a content smile before drifting off, letting your boyfriend’s soothing voice lull you to sleep. 

a/n: god im so lonely :’) anyways yeah that was the cheesiest shit i’ve ever written, i hope you guys liked it lmao <3 i just felt like writing something soft and cute you know :(( like yeah where can i get a hoshi pls and thank you <3 but in all seriousness, though, i hope this fic brings you some sort of comfort and makes you smile! this was also my first hoshi fic :) 

tagging: @skyjoong​ , @playmetheclassics​, @hong-jisoo​ , @taeyo95​ , @shuadotcom​ + anyone else who wants to read this <3 ! 

#mine #seventeen fluff #kwon soonyoung x reader #hoshi x reader #fic: 7pm

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 • 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐖

SUMMARY: jack always had a thing for you ever since he met you through a friend . He craved being around you and having your attention. It's gotten to the point where you were all he ever thought about. He knew he had to get you.

GENRE: fluff, SMUT

WARNING: oral(Both ways), Unprotected sex, dirty talk I guess,

PAIRING: jack Harlow x black reader

AUTHOR NOTE: this for the black girls<3

WORD COUNT: this a good 2K or 3k IDK. I wrote it on my phone so

JACK HARLOW MASTERLIST

©writing by Iguessweallcrazyithinktho do not steal or repost any of my content anywhere without my consent

Enjoy

🌸☁️💗🧚✨💅🏾🌺🌷🌠🍓🍭🎠🌼☄️

Jack just couldn't stop thinking about you. You were on his mind 24/7. You were like an addiction to him, he never stopped thinking about you. It drove him insane, but in a good way.

Jack met you a few months ago through druski. You were sitting in the back of a party when druski introduced you two.

"jack this is my friend y/n. Y/n this is my friend jack."

Jack took you in. Man You were fucking gorgeous. You had on a black dress; your curves were showing and filling the dress well, Your hair was braided into a few box Braids that fell over your shoulder, And Your face was clear from any makeup because you decide to go natural today.

Jack was taken aback by how beautiful you were. He's never seen a woman as pretty as you. It took him a bit to regain himself.

Jack stuck out his hand "hey, I'm jack."

You laughed, shaking his. "Yeah I heard."

"alright, I'm going to go get some drinks y'all keep chatting." You watched as druski walked away. When he was out of sight you turned to Jack. "So... You rap?"

You and Jack talked for the next three hours in the bar. you both felt so comfortable around each other even though you had just met. Jack was warm and inviting which was very different from any of the other guys you had spoke To. You would be uncomfortable, but not with Jack.

Jack on the other hand seemed to never get bored of hearing you talk. The whole time you talked he would listen with a smirk on his lips, his eyes would be on you giving you his full attention. It was driving you crazy and by the way he kept doing it he knew.

By 11pm you were getting tired. You had been sitting and talking with jack the whole time, you didn't notice the time passing bye.

"ah it's getting late. I should get home." You stood up from your chair and grabbed your phone and your bag. Jack quickly got up from his chair. "You got a ride home." He asked you suddenly.

"uh no. Druski was my ride home, but he's drunk as you can see." Jack looked to where You pointed he. saw druski who was currently making a fool out of himself on the dance floor.

"you want me to drive you home? Only if you're comfortable you know." Jack tucked his hand in his pocket. He was hoping you would say yes. He just wanted to spend a little more time with you.

"um.. yeah sure. Thank you." You smiled at jack making his stomach flip.

You both walked out of the club to Jack's car. He opened the door for you letting you get in. You thanked him, you loved seeing him be a gentleman even though he didn't have to.

You gave jack the directions to your place. The whole way over you and Jack sat in silence, but a comfortable one. You stared out the window the whole way over giving jack an opportunity to steal a few glances at you. He just couldn't get over how amazing you were. You were his dream girl and he didn't even notice it yet.

"ok, we're here." Jack parked His car right in front of your apartment building. "Thank you for the ride. I truly appreciate it."

"no problem." Jack said smiling at you. You chuckled a bit as you gathered your things and got out. Before you closed the door you leaned down and looked down at jack.

"I had a good time with you tonight."

Jack laughed, he started to blush at your words. "I did too."

You smiled at him once more before you shut the door and walked away.

That was the last time jack ever saw you. Three months ago since he's seen you and you were still on his mind. No matter how much he tried you never disappeared from his thoughts.

As much as jack wanted to call you he didn't have your number or anything. He cursed himself for not getting it that night when he had the chance to. He hoped he saw you again, he knew he wouldn't let you slip through his fingers that easily again.

You Had such an influence on him he couldn't help but make a song about you. You were poison(the good kind) and Jack wasn't ashamed to admit it.

-

It was the night of the album release party. Jack was excited about this, he was finally able to share the album he spent long hours into.

The party was loud with all the people in it and the music playing. Jack was enjoying himself talking to druski and Urban about some random stuff. It went on up until druski put pause on the conversation.

"yo is that my girl y/n?"

Jack head turned quickly when he heard your name. His heart skipped a couple of beats when he saw you. It seemed like you just had walked in.

He was taken aback by you again, just like the first time. you still looked the same as you did three months ago except your clothes and hair was different. Your hair was natural showing off it's amazing volume. And instead of a black dress you had on a red silk one.

"hey y/n, over here." Druski called out to you.

You smiled once you laid eyes on them. you began to walk over to them with a smile plastered on your face. with each step Jack's heart thumped against his chest. It was finally happening, he was seeing you again.

"hi guys!" You gave druski a hug along with Urban before you turned to Jack. "Hi Jack." You said giddy as you pulled him into a hug.

Jack couldn't help the smile that formed on his face as he hugged you. He wanted to hug you forever, he feared you'll disappear again.

"hey s-so how you been?" Jack asked stumbling over his words as he pulled away. "I've been good."

Jack was ready to respond but his security guard stopped him. "Jack, you gotta be on stage bro."

Jack sighed as he turned back to you. "I gotta go. We gonna talk later though." Jack pointed at you as he walked away making you snicker. "I promise."

You smiled as you watched him walk on stage. It was great to see him again. It felt like too long, you would be lying if you said you didn't miss him. There was literally no guys like him.

The party went on. Jack preformed a bit and talked to a couple of people. As much as he liked doing that he wanted to see you. He craved you right now.

When jack finished talking to all the people he needed to he went on the hunt to find you. His heart pounded against his chest as he searched for you. He hoped you didn't leave. He wouldn't know what to do with himself if you did."

Jack searched the balcony, some hallways, the bar anywhere he possibly could, but there was no sign of you. He was ready to give up until he spotted you standing in the back corner looking out at everyone.

He sighed, getting rid of the panic that was about to take over his body, then walked over to you.

"hey I been looking for you."

jack walked over to you smirking. "Oh you have?" Jack nodded.

"so we're going to talk?"

"yeah, after this ends you know. I wanna make sure there's no interruptions you know."

You nodded, "well I'll be here waiting. I'm not going anywhere."

-

The night soon ended and Jack got enough time with you. He decided to bring you to his hotel room that way you both had no chances of being caught together.

Jack opened his hotel room door letting you walk in first. "Wow this is big." you mumbled as you took in the room the consisted of a king size bed, a sitting area and a huge bathroom. Jack chuckled as he shut the door. "Yeah, I'm rich you know."

You rolled your eyes at him but laughed right after.

"sit down." Jack motioned to the couch. You both took a seat. "Let's talk. It's been a while since I seen you. How you been? Got anything going on?"

Jack looked at you with his pretty Blue eyes making your face heat up. You quickly looked away from him.

"well I've been good. I finished school and I got a job as a nail tech which I love."

Jack oohed making you laugh. "You know how I love nail tech." Jack blurted out.

"yeah. You have a song on it. Speaking of music congratulations on the album. It's amazing. I know people are saying it sucks, but I genuinely think it's amazing."

Jack grinned as he looked at you. He let out a little thank you before leaning back on the couch. You took notice of his legs that were spread wide open. You knew he did that a ton but seeing it in person really made you squirm.

"so how have things been for you?" You asked. "I know you've had a long few months."

Jack nodded, "yeah it has. I've been traveling a lot, performing a lot and shit, I haven't had tons of to relax, but you being here with you really takes the stress away."

"well I'm glad." You leaned up against the back of the couch and looked at him.

"crazy how we have nothing to talk about now, but the first time we met we had a ton." Jack said.

"I think we might have talked enough. You leaned scooted closer to jack and cuddled into his side. He was shocked by the action, but wrapped his arm around you. You looked up at him with a smile.

jack couldn't hold himself back anymore. His lips landed on yours. He was expecting you to pull away, but luckily you didn't.

Jack keep the kiss up. Your mouths explored each others.

It didn't take long for you to start straddling jack. Your kiss never broke even when jack picked you up and even when he laid you on the bed.

You wrapped your arms around his neck pulling him deeper into the kiss. You could feel Jack's hand trailing down your body. As he grew closer to your cunt you whimpered.

Jack pulled away from your lips. "Let's get this off." Jack motioned to the dress. You let him pull it off of you; you were left in nothing but a pair of black panties.

You started to grow shy by the lack of clothing on your body, but jack wanted none of that.

"don't be shy. You're fucking beautiful. And I'm going to fucking show you." Jack leaned down and kissed down your chest and your stomach. His hand looped under the band of your panties slowly before he pulled them down. The whole time his eyes never left you. It sent shivers down you spine at how he looked at you.

He got in between your thighs and kissed up them. You bite the bottom of your lips as you watched him tease you. He knew you were yearning for him. He fucking loved it.

"jack, please."

"please what?" He asked as he looked up at you. "Please eat me out." You breathed out. You cringed at your words, but your mind was soon cleared when you felt Jacks tongue on your pussy. He licked up your fold tasting you.

Your hands flew to his curls, you pushed him in needing more to which jack replied with a grunt.

"fuck, your tongue feels so good jack." You groaned as your back arched off the bed. Jack looked up at you through hooded eyes. You looked so hot in this position. He wasn't going to lie, he's been dreaming of this moment and now that he's experiencing it he never wanted it to end.

You released a few moans as jack continued eating you out. He was so good at it it didn't take long before you were close to your high.

"jack, I'm going to cum." You slurred out. Jack pulled away briefly to tell you to. "Cum for me pretty girl."

The nickname was enough to leave you a moaning mess. From all your squirming jack had to hold you down. He couldn't help but smirk, with his tongue he did that to you. Just imagine his dick.

Jack got up from in between your legs. Insanely he went to kiss you. You could taste yourself on his lips which made you smile.

"how long have you wanted to do that?" You asked him. "Fuck For too long."

You laugh as you sat up. "Well now it's my turn. Lay down." Jack smirked at your demand and laid down.

He got rid of all his clothes leaving him in nothing. You took his dick in your hand and stroked it a couple of times as you looked up at him. Jack moaned a bit, but not enough for you.

You leaned down and took your time licking him slowly from his balls to the tip. You looked and watched his mouth fall open at the feeling. Jack twitched at the slowness, it was too much to handle.

Once your tongue reached the top you swirled it around the tip collecting pre cum before you took him fully in your mouth. Jack hands gently fell to your hair (he was being sure not to mess it up), he slightly pushed your head down on him. You gagged at him hitting the back of your throat. He was long, you knew you wouldn't be able to take all of him.

Your hand took the place of what your mouth could. You stroked and sucked him making Jack twitch in your mouth. You noticed very soon that you weren't hearing much noise from jack other than a few grunts here and there. You pulled away and looked at him. "Are you holding in your moans?"

Jack nodded, his cheeks starting to get red. "Yeah, I get shy sometimes."

"don't be shy Jack, I wanna hear you. It's such a turn on."

You returned your mouth to his dick making jack hiss. He took your advice and began to moan. You grew wetter as you listened to him. He had such a pretty moan that it made you moan.

The feeling of your mouth and hand was just too much for jack. He came right down your throat with a loud moan. "FUCK!"

You swallowed every last drop as you pulled away from a panting jack.

"you good?" You asked jack as you crawled up to him. Without responding jack flipped you over so you were on your back.

He grabbed your legs and made sure he was in between them. He grabbed his dick and Ra it between your fold collecting your wetness. You moaned at the feeling but not as loudly ad you moaned when he pushed into you.

"so fucking tight, pretty girl. Such a good pussy." He mumbled as he went deeper and deeper into you.

Before he started he asked if you were doing ok. You nodded giving him the green light to go and which he did.

He thrusted into you. You both moaned at the feeling. Jack leaned down and kissed you as he keep fucking you. Just like earlier your tongues explored each others mouths. Your moans from him filling you up filled his mouth.

When jack pulled away he hissed and looked down in between you both. He watched as his dick disappeared into you. It made him twitch see how you swallowed him.

"such a warm tight pussy. Takes me so well. Fuck , you're going to make me cum." Jack moaned out as he buried his face into your neck.

His thrust grew faster. Your moans grew louder every time he slammed into you hitting your cervix and g spot. It didn't take long before you felt the burn in your lower stomach.

"jack I'm going to cum." You panted out.

"where do you want me to cum huh?" Jack looked up at you waiting for your answer. "On my stomach please."

Jack nodded and sat up. He thrust in you harder a few more times. You came after the third one. You moaned out loudly gripping the sheets beneath you.

Jack wasn't far behind you. He pulled out of you, he stroked himself a couple of times before he spilled his seed on your stomach.

You moaned and looked down at the mess on you. It was hot and enough to turn you on again.

Jack got up and grabbed a towel from the bathroom. He wiped the cum off of your stomach before throwing the towel somewhere in the room then climbing in the bed.

"so was that good?" Jack asked. You turned to him and nodded. "More than good."

"good." Jack stayed quiet for a minute before speaking again. "Can I take you out a date? A proper date."

You looked at jack, "hm... I think I can do that with you."

Jack smiled. "Shit, I'm excited." Jack wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a kiss.

he finally got the girl he wanted. He couldn't be more happy

----<3----

Feedback bitches?

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack Harlow smut #jack Harlow x black! reader #jack Harlow fanfiction #Jack harlow x you

[dcfanfictioncatalogue]

cassie sandsmark JAN 2024 fic awards

what order am I doing these in? who knows! certainly not chronologically. this is my first time taking a look at cassie's fics on ao3 and I decided to start from the top of 2024. if you're new, this is cherry's fic awards, where I comb through every fic posted/updated in a character tag for a specific month and find my favorites, since a lot of these don't get the attention that I think they deserve.

sunday girl, by misspickman (@misspickman). 3k, E, timcassie. my summary: tim and cassie fall into a friends with benefits relationship to work through their respective gender issues. my notes: I literally adore everything by this author and all of its writing so perhaps I am insanely biased but oh my GODDD listen I'm not even into timcassie but perhaps it was bc of how platonic despite being sexual this was but this was just. it hit so hard. cassie's head during/post tt03 is such a place to live and I'm obsessed with this fic <3

&&

Sleepless Nights, by Morning66. 1.7k, T, rosecassie. my summary: cassie can't sleep, and as she's out walking, she finds rose sitting by the pool. my notes: am I this predictable? yeah. I LOVE THIS. me whenever two girls are in a hurt no comfort relationship.... the slight note of internalized homophobia.... god. it's only one scene but it contains so much of them in it and a view of cassie's relationships.... yes yes yes I loved this sm

&&

Against All Odds, by Cynder2013. 1.3k, T, gen. my summary: during her 16th birthday party, cassie reflects on her life as a half-blood, starting with meeting nico di angelo. my notes: I don't normally go for crossovers, but this one hit!!! I think it's the fact that it feels so natural-- cassie already has ties to greek mythology, after all. I adore the conflict of I lived this long -- do I deserve it? what do I do with all this time I never expected to have? A+ I really really liked this one

&&

Honey by neptunesenceladus (@neptunesenceladus). 1.3k, G, gen. my summary: in the wake of donna's death, kori teaches cassie how to harvest honey. my notes: the quiet peace of this is what struck me-- so much of grieving in DC comics is loud and angry, but here the grieving is done in between steps. life goes on. I also really like fics where you can very clearly tell that the author is eager to talk about a very niche hobby they're into, and the intricacies of harvesting honey play nicely into the messaging and the pacing.

ask box is open ++ find my fic rec libraries organized here

#cassie sandsmark #timcassie #rosecassie #cassierose #guidance recommended #family friendly #100 to 2k #2k to 10k

[kachwoww]

I'm Bri (she/her), I write for a bunch of different fandoms, and love to talk about them! You can find all my fics here

FIC LIST

marauders a case of mistaken identity- James and Regulus have a meet-cute in London. Not abandoned! WIP 5k.

In My Life- before Regulus can go to the cave to get the Horcrux, he's caught and tortured. Remus runs into him during a Death Eater raid, and thinking he's Sirius, rescues him. Regulus knows everything about Voldemort's plan and can end the war, but he's been tortured to insanity. So not angsty at all! Pretty much all fluff <3 (also not abandoned) WIP 4k.

I Didn't Catch Your Name- James and Regulus have a one-night stand that ends on a bad note. If only they could be brought back together by a series of incredible coincidences? (i swear it's not abandoned) WIP 14k.

Brother Mine- Regulus survives the cave, makes up with his brother (mostly), and starts hunting down horcruxes. With Lily's help, (they're best friends (also this isn't abandoned)) WIP 35k.

batman!

white christmas- Jason goes to Christmas at the manor for the first time since his return, and it goes to shit! Then a thieving magician/sorcerer/witch sends him and Damian back in time. Good thing Dick can help them, right! Right? (no.) Completed 13k.

Playing the Victim- Dick/Therapy. Like that's literally the fic, this man needs help. Completed 3k.

#today i learned i can't spell abandoned #masterlist #fic list #marauders era #batman #but also #the 100 #marvel #starwars

[thistlecatfics]

oooh this ask game is so fun - any of 7, 8, or 29 please? ❤️

7. a fic that says fuck canon

Family Legacy (1.6k, T)

Three generations of trans/nonbinary/gender questioning Tonks-Lupins.

This fic is more of a "canon defiant" fic than a "fuck canon" fic, but I think with jkr escalating her level of transphobic awfulness to new, extraordinary heights nothing says "fuck canon" than writing all of her canon couples as actually queer and trans and integrating queer history and queer joy and queer grief into the universe she created.

Ted Tonks, Nymphadora Tonks, and Teddy Tonks-Lupin are all trans dykes. It's just a fact.

8. a fic that embraces canon

Cygnus's Failure (Sirius & Cygnus, 3k, T)

In December 1981, Cygnus tries, and fails, to get his nephew out of Azkaban.

I write a lot of canon-compliant fic, but I think this is the only fic of mine that really tries to solve a problem of canon: Sirius's lack of trial. I think it's somewhat realistic that the Ministry would want a scapegoat for Voldemort and have someone to put in prison and blame the whole thing on in November 1981. I don't think it's unrealistic that Sirius does not have his say in court. BUT I do think it's unrealistic that the entire Black family would allow their sole remaining male descendent to go to Azkaban when we know most wealthy purebloods were able to talk their way out of Azkaban (including pre-attack on the Longbottoms Bellatrix!)

So, rather than Sirius going to Azkaban without a trial solely because he's abandoned by everyone, what if he goes to Azkaban partly because he's an insanely stubborn man who is overwhelmed with guilt and who refuses any connection with his blood family and who thinks his only chance to see a certain werewolf is if he remains in prison...

This fic was inspired by two pieces of meta (the first proposing that the Longbottoms were attacked well after 1981 and the second on the Black family response to Sirius being imprisoned). Note that this fic takes place before the attack on the Longbottoms.

29. a fic to know more about me

Duty (Sirius/Regulus, 2k, M)

Regulus knew what a duty was.

I started writing this fic because my emotions were just a total stormy mess while taking the train down to visit my parents, and I needed to displace them somewhere else. I didn't think I would actually be able to turn it into something publishable but then it seamlessly became a Regulus character study fic with just a couple rounds of editing. I think the canon compliance of it helps disguise the way it's frighteningly close to a self-insert fic.

thank you for the lovely ask <3

#lesbian tedromeda #sirius black #blackcest #regulus black #nymphadora tonks #teddy tonks lupin

[myonmukyuu]

Art Summary: 2022

It's that time of year again! This makes my 9th year of art summaries... Kind of insane to think about.

It's been a very eventful year and I have a lot to say. Extended art performance review under the cut 👌 (3k words lmao)

Previous: 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021

ABOUT THE COMIC:

So! What happened this year? Well, my book happened. I'm not sure if anything else happened ahfhasjkdkasf

See, I actually cheated this art summary a tiny bit. Usually I use the upload date of the art to place it in the summary. But if I did that for this year, there would be at least 4 blank spots. That's why February, April and May all feature different pages of the same comic (CH 9).

I really did spend the first half of the year finishing my comic. I only released 2 chapters too (the finale and the epilogue). In March I took a week and a half off to work on a short for Ayumu's birthday, but otherwise slaved all the way until June for the webcomic.

Then I spent July and August doing all of the redrawing and edits required for a physical release. Those who have a copy of my book might already know but the first two chapters have been redrawn. I also had to go through the entire comic, fixing it so that it could actually be printed (because the webcomic version definitely can't be printed as it is.) It was super time-consuming. Like, I can't even begin to describe. Moving forward I'll try to draw every comic so that it's printable from the beginning so I don't have to deal with reformatting ever again...

I'm pretty sure it was in August that I had the first copy of the book done. Then the preordering period opened in Septemeber... and now we're here! People are just now starting to receive their books. Sorry it took so long guys ;w;

I'm very happy though... Depending on who you ask, 100 sales might not be a lot, but it's a lot to me. To think that so many people would spend the money to buy this kind of product is just so surprising to me... It's expensive and all of the content is already available to read for free!!! So it's really surprising and I'm so incredibly grateful. That's why I went through the trouble of creating that golden special print for everyone! It was quite a bit of money out of my pocket, but I really wanted to show my appreciation.

As a side note, the 100 sales were really exhausting to pack. My body was sore in November because of it LMAO

So I'd say this year was great for my comic! Both its webcomic finale and its physical release. But this summary isn't meant to be about my comic, it's supposed to be about my art and me as an artist.

ABOUT MY ART:

So how did my art go this year?

Looking back I feel nothing but exhaustion. I know I'm happy to have my comic released but, my body and mind is still very very tired. I feel like I took at least 2-3 weeks off or more from work throughout the year to keep the comic on track. It's just a huge undertaking.

What I'm getting at is I feel a tired and... a little disappointed. But don't get me wrong, I don't feel regret! It's just that... well every artist draws for their own reasons. For me, I love getting my ideas and stories out there. So I guess I felt creatively-starved spending about half a year polishing and releasing an already-complete product. Also technically starved - you don't really see much improvement if all you're doing is cleaning up art. I didn't really have a lot of time to draw because of the physical release so I often felt like I wasn't doing enough.

And honestly that's my main sentiment. While I feel happy and satisfied with releasing the book, another part of me feels like she didn't do enough.

In terms of technical skill, I definitely saw improvement this year. It's like something clicked in me and I had a better understanding of atmospheric lighting. CH 9 and the epilogue are probably some of my favourite bits of colouring I've ever done. I just love how it turned out. In CH 9, the gradual setting of the sun to create this orange/pink/purple colour palette was so fun to implement. And in the Epilogue, this blue/green/yellow rainy day came out perfectly. It was a rainy day, but unlike CH 7, it wasn't a dreary downpour but something more hopeful instead. I have a love for creating atmosphere and especially through colour. And I think I did well there.

In the realm of black/white, I also feel lots of improvement! I'm becoming more confident with monochrome and am starting to push it further. I'm not satisfied with my skill level, but I think it's promising. I may be more confident with creating tone through colour, but I'm sure I can do the same without it!

This year I also did quite a bit of painting. I really love how the October and November artworks came out. Honestly it was around this point in the year, I had the most time to output works as the only comic work I had to do was purely admin (until I started packaging things in November). I could go into technical depth, but this post is long enough. Just know that I'm happy with the little leaps my colouring skills made.

GOALS FOR 2022:

For my art summaries, I've been doing a performance review styled thing where I create goals for the upcoming year. Let's take a look at what goals I wrote for 2022 and how I went with them.

“I want to finish my comic series”

Passed with flying colours! I think the comic release was a success. This goal is a little cheap of a goal though, since I don't think I'd let myself live it down if I gave up.

“I also want to continue to try things that are outside of my comfort zone. I want to see myself try things like different angles/perspectives and more complex backgrounds.”

Now this goal... I think I made progress here. I'm not sure if people noticed but I did definitely try to slip in different angles here and there. I'm particularly good at them... but I'm trying! And I think that's the least I can do. You won't get good at something if you don't try after all. That being said, I should push backgrounds more... I rarely do them 😅

"I want to do more illustrations/quick drawings on top of my comic work."

My comic work was suffocating a lot of the time. But I did try to draw on top of it. I haven't really talked about it, nor shown anyone, but I started learning copic markers this year (borrowed my friend's set!). So in the background I've been doing 30-60 minute traditional art exercises. I'm not terribly diligent, but diligent enough that I already think it's made an impact on my art. See, I'm only doing monochrome copic markers (I'm not confident enough to do colour just yet). I'm pretty sure doing monochrome markers has helped me with my manga skills 😂. I have a better understanding of tones and values because of it! Isn't that kind of amazing? Come to think of it, it's linked to the next goals.

"I want to learn to paint."

"I want to learn to draw faster."

While I still have a long way to go, somehow my marker exercises have helped me with these too. The understanding of tones/values has made an impact on coloured work and painting as well. And because I'm doing shorter pieces, my speed has increased a tiny bit. I'm sure if I keep at it, I can continue to develop better habits!

"I want to draft more quickly and be smarter about it."

Now this goal is something I have just been trying to mentally direct myself to. It's working... a little bit. I still need to try harder.

See, I think my drafting process is really slow and inefficient. This results in me spending too much time drawing a comic because I've drafted like 5 extraneous pages. If I wanna increase my output and lower my workload, I have to learn to be more clever with how I compose each page. I think I got a tiny bit better. Need to work harder on that for sure (it's quite hard to just "learn" though...)

MOVING FORWARD:

With the past year in mind, how do I want 2023 to go? To be honest, I still feel so exhausted because of 2022, I definitely need some time to recover, so let's not go too crazy next year.

But before I create my next goals, I wanted to talk about where I want to go in general - the grand scheme of things. Like I mentioned, I feel a lot of disappointment, like I wasn't doing enough. Which is contradictory because I also feel like I did too much with how exhausted I am... But the source of that disappointment is really tied in with how I feel about my art skill on a technical level.

I'm nearing a whole decade of hobby artist experience. And I don't feel like my art shows it. While there are things that I am better at, there's so much that I struggle with.

I want to become better. I want to improve.

It's hard to explain but I feel like I'm not doing the best I can for the stories I want to tell if I don't keep pushing and learning. And I love what I make, so I want to do those stories justice.

So it's really important to me that I keep trying to improve.

In the long term, I think my dream is to be like a pro-manga artist. Please don't make fun of me LMFAO. But there's more to it. See, I don't actually want to be a pro artist. I never want to compromise my creative vision for the sake of pandering to an audience. I sincerely think I wouldn't be able to succeed without doing that so I'm content with drawing as a hobby. A programmer as my day job and a manga artist by night...

I want to be as skilled as a pro some day though.

To be honest, I think the distance is so great that it's basically impossible. So my true goal is a little lower than that.

My true long-term goal is to be... a little comparable to a pro.

And I don't think I'm at that point. And I don't want to use "being a hobbyist" as an excuse to allow myself to remain like this.

I think it's terrifying actually. Where I'm at with my art.

I'm really happy people enjoy it, and don't get me wrong - I love my own work. I love drawing. But I think it's important to be critical of it - if I want to be able to reach my goals.

I think if people read this far, they might be thinking something like "but you're already so good!" or something to that effect. But I don't think it's true.

I think it's terrifying because there's so much I'm not good at. Comics are scary because they're an amalgamation of so many different skillsets. I possess some of these skills but there's just so many different ways that I feel that I'm lacking.

For instance, my art itself has such stiff lines. I'm not great at perspective. My art isn't dynamic. And this is just a few examples of stuff related to my illustration skills.

But comics are more than that.

There's the individual panel compositions that come together to create a unifying page composition. The visual flow - controlling how the reader scans the page. The storytelling skills - pacing, dialogue, story beats. The dialogue writing skills. The typesetting.

I think there's so many places I'm weak with and it's scary because it's difficult to just pick something to improve at when it feels like everything is wrong at once. It's so easy for me to pick up some manga from a shelf, flick through and think "this artist does x better than me, how can I learn from them?" but learning is hard and I'm not good at it so I'm just stuck with this awareness that I could be better.

But at the end of the day, I just have to pick a direction and go, right? I think that's all I can do and that's okay. It's just hard to shake the feeling of drowning in my own mediocrity.

Sorry I didn't mean to bring down the mood of this art summary.

I promise that at the end of the day that I love drawing. This is just my overly-critical side shining through. I don't have too much natural talent, just a very stubborn mind. I kind of need to be critical so I can push myself in the right direction. And I'm fairly happy with the way I've been pushing myself through these past years.

I'm not particularly fussed if my works receive a lot of traction or not because what's most important to me is the way I see my own work. My personal satisfaction.

And that's just tied with doing the best I can!

So with that in mind...

GOALS FOR 2023:

"Improve at atmospheric lighting"

This isn't particularly ambitious because it's something I'm already working on, but I know I can push lighting even further. So expect to see me experimenting more and more!

"Participate in a paid online course"

Now this is linked to my wall of text just now. I feel very overwhelmed so I think having an unbiased and experienced teacher's guidance could be valuable. I'm eyeing ones that include personalised feedback. The only concern is that it's hard to find the time for things like this when I work full-time.

Also it's a bit scary having a professional roast me, but I think it'd be good for me.

"Continue to practise traditionally"

This is linked to all of my technical art gripes. I think continuing to do traditional art exercises will help me with a lot of my weak points.

"Continue to be ambitious with art"

I don't mean ambition on a work-load level, but I want to continue to push out of my comfort-zone. Keep trying those weird angles and backgrounds, be more experimental!

"Start planning that next story"

I always have a billion different story ideas in my back pocket that I am itching to tell. I also don't wanna die of overwork though. So lets keep the bar low.

I have many great ideas, so I want to start outlining the next one! This is just a vague goal to remind myself to keep thinking ahead.

"Rest up."

I think this is the most important goal. Like I said I feel completely and utterly exhausted this year.

So I want Myon in 2023 to have more time for herself. Improve her health, catch up with her relationships, spend more time watching movies and playing video games.

Don't work too hard next year.

EXTRA REFLECTION:

I seriously don't know if anyone actually reads these reflections. I wonder what kind of person I come off across... (probably a try-hard 😂)

I wanted to talk about one more thing. It's not really linked to goals, just the future in general.

So I've been drawing for Nijigasaki for 2 years now. I think a lot of people are moving on from it though.

To be honest, I think that's okay. I'm kind of used to the people around me shifting into new interests. I think I'll still be with Niji for a long time to come. I just have a lot of large scale ideas and will probably stick with them unless something sweeps me off my feet.

I mean, even if my ideas take too long to actualise while I'm interested in Niji, I'm also open to converting things into original content. There are just so many stories to tell...

It makes me wonder why my readers enjoy my work and how they interact with it? Are people a fan of me? The ship/characters/fandom? Or the stories?

Probably some mix of the above. It's not terribly important why though.

I'm sorry that I'm not very good at keeping up with everyone's interests. I think the world moves too quickly and I draw too slow and I can barely keep up. But I'm a bit too stubborn with my own desires so I keep working on my own things without another thought. So maybe that apology is a bit empty eheh

But I hope people will continue to enjoy the stories that I make.

I should be less harsh on myself though. 9 years of art isn't something to just shrug off.

Anyways, before I keep rambling. Happy new year everyone. Let's keep working hard in 2023!

#ive been using the same art summary template for the last 9 years #it doesnt even have the year displayed in the image but im committing anyways LMAO #art summary #i drew setsupomu for an entire year #i talk a lot in the readmore; no pressure to read it though #it's more for me than for anyone else #also its 3k

[mango-jpeg]

best for you

started around dec 3 finished around the 12 then let it stew for a couple days before doing final edits

the whole point of this was limo sex but that didn’t even happen. i am cursed.

the idea of aiba jumping ship made me laugh so i had to commit

doubling down on date’s body dysmorphia 👍 (saito yelling across the warehouse: what happened to my tits date? what did you do to my tits??)

had this vague idea rattling around for a couple months for a wriolette fic and thought the idea of neu giving wrio's strap a literally killer bj was kinda funny. at the same time had the idea of a cut limo bj scene floating around since i finished amateur and i guess they melded in my brain 

past tense for the first time since 2020… i always like little jumps in time ‘later he’ll realize…’ sorta thing, but admittedly it doesn’t work as well with present tense so i thought… i could try it out this way..?

wanted to balance out the ending by doing a frame thing at the beginning but it gave me a lot of trouble... ended up cutting a bunch of ryuki stuff:

Ryuki remembers his parents obliquely; through the limo, their portraits on the family shrine, his mother’s earrings, his father’s cuff-links. He brings out his memories of them only occasionally, to savour them without risking their shine. He remembers his brother every time he looks in the mirror. There’s no way to avoid it.

For a time, he used his brother’s license as ID. Whenever a clerk or bartender nodded at the card it was like in some small way he was there too, shopping on the way home, going out for a pint after class, and Ryuki could pretend he’d lived into adulthood. That license expired years ago, but Ryuki still carries it in his wallet.

reading:

The Likeness, Tana French

nevada's fault

also watched portrait of a lady on fire which great news still makes me feel insane!!!

as is typical i wrote the first chunk on the notes app in my phone - around 3k - before pasting it into gdocs. probably did like 80% of the writing/editing for this on my phone, since i wasn't being too precious about it

anyway if you’re particularly nosy (like me) i’ve copied over the original note to this doc since it’s relatively short. i constantly edit as i write but i think you could say this is the first draft.. you can see how often i skip ahead - it’s all about that momentum baybee

ok thx 4 reading love u bye

#writing journal

[stevenose]

hi! just wanted to pop in and say i really look up to you as a writer and i love all your work (your camboy!steve au is actually my favorite thing ever) :) and i wanted to thank you so much for giving us your work and time :)

ai used to write a lot and i dont really do it anymore but ive been considering starting again! i wanted to know if you had any advice or tips on starting out on tumblr?

you are so nice 😭 thank you for liking my work and being here!!!

you absolutely should start writing again!! my advice is pretty simple:

1. do not under ANY!!!!!! circumstances compare your work to another writer’s work. EVER. it is truly not worth it. your mental health will make you hate writing and baby you don’t deserve to go thru that! just because your writing is different from someone’s doesn’t make it bad. you can admire another writers work but please remember yours is just as valuable.

2. write what YOU want to write. you will burn yourself out otherwise. requests are fun and i love doing them but my last blog - omg. i got so overwhelmed with requests for things i felt i HAD to write to make people happy and it made me stop writing for over a year. so if you do open requests just remember you’re not evil for not fulfilling ones that don’t speak to you!

3. ^ along with that, write whatever the hell you wanna write ok. i think the fandom is in a very transformative period rn. our renaissance if u will. we just be writing whatever the fuck. if i can write flayed steve you can write whatever u want ok baby. u wanna write that monsters inc AU with steve and dustin as sully and mike then go for it ok

4. the more u write the better you will get. you will undeniably look back on things you’re writing rn a year from now and see growth. just keep writing even if it feels weird at first!

5. i haven’t rly gotten hate mail on THIS blog but i have on my main. the number one thing to do in that situation is just delete it. 10 out of 10 times people are literally just jelly that ur pussy tight ok. it doesn’t matter. a strangers opinion of you on the internet does not matter. i GUARANTEE you that. so if you get a message or someone being like “lol ur writing SUCK” just delete it and don’t listen to it. trust me on this one

and just some tips:

1. write ur things on google docs or the notes app for the love of god. tumblr will randomly refresh when ur 3k into a fic and u will want to die. ask me how i know

2. cross posting to ao3 is helpful for getting ur works recognized but it’s not a necessity at all

3. the tagging system on this cursed website is really bad and fucked up and crazy. if you want ur post to be in the tags (gets it visibility = gets u some followers), you should tag the most important things first. i.e you write smut for steve. tag as steve harrington smut FIRST. we all love to ramble in the tags but from experience if you put a personal tag on a fic first in line, it has less of a chance getting published into the character tag. it’s insane

4. make friends!!! we all just want to write on here. reach out to your mutuals and bounce ideas off of each other. it’s fun!!

5. RETURN THE SLAB OR SUFFER THE PHAROH’S CURSE

#stevenose posts #i hope this is somewhat helpful!!!???

[officialcharactersimp]

Mending & Amends

(Graduation Gift Part 4)

Summary: the fourth installment of my graduation gift series (can be found on my masterlist). This picks up literally seconds after the end of pt 3 with Natasha trying to find ways to make amends and get you to trust her again. No smut, but still not appropriate.

A/N: author’s note WC: 3k (holy heck)

CW: dark fic; mommy!nat; there is no porn, I repeat no porn; but there is mommy milk/breastfeeding; reader is injured; dubcon existence; 18+ only, do you hear me??

While you’re out, Natasha has time to tend to your injuries without you cowering and crying. Without all the guilt.

She picks your limp form up gently and brings you back out to the basement proper and lays you face-down on the bed-crib. She goes to get some medical supplies and cleans you up, then bandages the open bits and rubs some healing salve all over you. With only a few strikes having landed on your core, she’s satisfied with rubbing some of the salve there.

She gets you to drink some water from a bottle in your sleep, your natural instincts she’s been nurturing taking over. She checks your temperature, a solid 99, which isn’t too bad. She wipes the sweat and tear-tracks from your face, then brushes your hair out again. She lays down beside you and drapes an arm over your waist, burying her face into the back of your neck as she tries to think of what she’ll do when you wake up.

An idea forms slowly as she runs her hand along your waist. Yes, that will work. You might not like it at first, but it will work if she bears through it. She’s not sure how much of the fear and pain on your face she can handle, but she needs to.

She moves you off the bed to make it up nice, then sets you down gently, face down. Whenever you’re healed up you’ll be able to lay on your back, but right now that’s not possible. She ties your hands and feet to frame corners with plenty of slack—she wants you to be able to move.

Finally, she reluctantly removes your collar, biting her lip as she does so. It looked so precious on you, a symbol of the progress of your relationship. All gone now, thanks to her paranoia and overreaction. As much as she doesn’t want to remove it, it’s not right to keep it on if it speaks a lie.

Then she waits for you to come to. It shouldn’t be much longer now, maybe another half hour or so. She sits in the rocking chair in the corner, anxiously bouncing her leg. She needs to get herself under control before you wake. She knows her little baby needs for her to be the collected, caring, soothing mommy right now, and that you will for some time.

You mumble a little as you begin to stir, picking your head up a little. She takes a deep breath and smiles before going over and crouching down to look at your face while she gently tucks your hair back.

“Hey baby,” she says softly. “How’s my little sleepyhead feeling?” she asks. You whimper and inch away from her.

“D-don’ touch me,” you stammer.

“It’s okay baby, mommy isn’t gonna hurt you,” she says.

She sits down beside you. “I am so so sorry about what I did earlier. I was scared you were gonna try to leave me and get hurt. It’s a nasty drop from that window. But I didn’t take the time to think past my initial reaction or ask you, and that was wrong. I overreacted out of fear and anger without stopping to think, and I’m so sorry, little one. I never should have done that,” she says, tears brimming in her eyes. You turn your head to look up at her, eyes searching hers for any sign of ingenuity. You find only regret and sadness.

“You mean it?” you ask softly.

“Yes baby,” she says. “And mommy promises never to punish you without talking first or before taking some deep breaths, okay?” she says.

“Pinky promise?” you ask.

“Pinky promise,” she sticks out her pinky to hook with yours. She’s thrilled that you’re already starting to be a bit little again. As you move to interlock with her, you notice the restraints.

“Wait, what?” all traces of your headspace are gone as you jerk up to look around at your tied limbs. “What the hell?”

“Baby, it’s to keep you safe. See? They’re not tight or anything,” she tugs on all the loose rope.

“This is insane! All of this is insane!” you shout at her for the first time in weeks. It breaks her heart even more.

“I told you, mommy’s gonna fix what she did. Mommy’s gonna show you you can trust me again, gonna take care of you, of everything. Make it so this collar means something again,” she taps it on the bedside table, just out of your reach. You bury your face in your pillow and sob.

“It’s gonna be okay, baby. Mommy’s here. Mommy’s gonna make it all better,” she curls up beside you and puts an arm over you again. Despite how upset you are, you lean into it, wanting the physical comfort you associate with her.

“How’s your bottom?” she asks.

“Hurts,” you mumble.

“Do you think some Advil might help?” she asks. You nod and she gets up briefly to go get it. “Here you go, baby,” you tilt your head up and she puts the pills in, then grabs your bottle of water. You roll your eyes but suck on it to get the water to wash the pills down. You nod a thank you.

“Are you hungry?” she asks. You nod. “What do you want? I’ll even go drive through somewhere if that will help,” she says. You think for a moment.

“McDonalds?” you ask hopefully. She nods and smooths your hair back.

“McDonalds will be here soon,” she assures you. “Mommy has to go see a friend, too, so it works out. I’ll be back in half an hour or so, okay?” she says. You nod.

She kisses your head, which you recoil from, and leaves. You’re left alone to lay face-down on the crib-bed, restrained and in pain, until she returns. It’s silent. It’s lonely. You’ve grown used to either having Natasha or the sounds of the TV running since you came down here.

You think back to this morning. Everything was so different. You honestly trusted her this morning, even if it wasn’t the strongest trust. But this afternoon reminded you that she was an unstable, dangerous, paranoid lunatic. And it scared you.

Truth be told, you’ve grown to like being “little,” as Natasha calls it, letting yourself stop thinking too much and trust your mommy—Natasha, you correct yourself—to take care of you. You liked playing with her and cuddling. And when she touched you, it felt so good. So much better than when you had touched yourself. You felt loved and cared for in some twisted way.

But that was all in the past, now. You’d been doing so well, both of you, and now this. How does she expect you to trust her again? You’re not sure. You turn your head and close your eyes.

—

“You’re sure this will work, Wan?” Natasha asks her friend anxiously as she pulls her shirt back on. The red glow around her is fading. Her bra feels painfully tight and she winces.

“I’m positive. It worked for me, and especially given that you told me it’s happened before with those meds. If not tonight, by tomorrow for sure. And here’s these,” she hands Natasha a package. “They’ll be much more comfortable.”

“Thanks, Wanda. I don’t know what I’d do without you, in all honesty,” she says. Wanda smiles and hugs her.

“I could say the same to you,” she smiles. “Go on, get back to your little one,” she shoos her playfully. Natasha waves and leaves, then drives by McDonalds as promised. She’s back in a little over half an hour to see you dozing. It warms her heart to see her precious baby sleeping.

“Come on, little one, mommy brought your food,” she says, shaking you gently. You open your eyes and push yourself up off of the bed some. “Let’s get you comfy,” she helps you find a position that isn’t too uncomfortable for your aching rear, then hands you your food. “What do we say?” she asks.

“Thank you,” you say with a french fry in your mouth. She smiles. The mommy will come back later. She won’t push it for tonight.

“Do you wanna watch some cartoons?” she asks. They always engross you and help you into your littlespace. You nod and she flicks through the TV until she finds one she knows you like.

You both eat in relative silence, watching the TV. At least you’re not trying to cower anymore. That’s good, right? Progress? She hopes so.

“I’m gonna use the potty,” she tells you, then gets up. You don’t notice her bring the package with her as does.

When she returns, you notice something different about her, but you can’t tell what. It’s a small difference, then. Maybe she just fixed her hair. She’s smiling though.

You’re finished with your food soon enough, and the show ends shortly after.

“Let’s get you in the bath now baby, hm?” she suggests. You feel gross anyways, so you nod. She unties you and scoops you up in her arms.

“Let me down!” you squirm.

“Hush now, like mommy told you, I’m gonna take care of everything. Gonna show you you can trust me again,” she says. You squirm all the way to the bathroom anyways. She sets you down on the toilet facing the wall, almost straddling it.

“Huh?” you ask.

“It’s less pressure on your little bottom,” she explains. You nod and use the toilet while she gets the tub ready, but when you go to get some toilet paper, Natasha beats you to it. “I’ve got it, baby,” she says, wiping your tender area gently. You wince and try to get away from her.

“Stop it, I’m not a baby!” you try to grab her hand and move it, but she stays still, unmoving.

“Come on, little one. I know you’re in there. I know you want to let mommy take care of you,” she says. You shake your head. “Baby, this is about me proving to you that you can trust me to take care of you,” her voice is even. “I want you to choose to let me prove it to you. That’s why I haven’t given you any of the medicine I used to. But that doesn’t mean I won’t. I’ll do whatever it takes to get you to believe how much I care about you again,” she says.

“But—“ you don’t know what you were planning on saying. “But I wanna do it myself. I can do it myself,” your voice is quiet as you lose your grip on her wrist, barely audible.

“That’s the thing, precious,” she steps closer to you, finishing her task and then using her other hand to pet your head. “I know you can do it. But you don’t have to. That’s why I’m here,” she says. You groan and lean forward on the toilet tank. “Come on, you’ll feel better when you’re clean,” she picks you up and sets you in the tub, then flushes the toilet.

You sigh and let her bathe you. Your body is too sore from getting dragged and caned to wash yourself that effectively anyways. When she gets to your most sensitive areas though, you squirm away from her and reach for the soap.

“It’s too sore. I wanna wash it myself,” you say quietly.

“I’m gonna be so careful, you won’t even notice,” she gently moved your hand away and got the soap again. Tears brimmed in your eyes and your bottom lip started to form a pout. “No, baby, don’t cry,” she gasps, petting your cheek. “Tell mommy what’s going on,” she says.

“I’m scared,” you say. “I don’t want you to touch it because you hurt me,” you say. Her heart breaks again.

“Okay, sweetie, how about this: we can do it together,” she takes your hand and puts it over hers, then begins to wash you gentler than ever. Your breathing hitches and your heart kicks up, but it’s over before it can go into full-blown panic.

“All done. You did such a good job, little one,” she praises you. “Ready to get out, or do you want to play in the water some?” she asks.

“Ready to get out,” you say. She picks you up out of the bath and dries you off with a soft towel before taking you out to the bed. She pulls on a soft shirt, leaving your bottom half uncovered so as not to irritate it. She changes into the spare pjs she keeps down here and crawls into bed beside you. You don’t welcome or recoil from her touch, which she’ll take as progress.

Her chest is still dully aching, but she knows she’s pushed you far enough for tonight. Maybe tomorrow she’ll be able to coax you into it.

—

When day comes again, Natasha is treating you the way she did when she first brought you down here, only with gentleness and tenderness where there was hardness and strictness before. The lack of the sedative drugs in your system makes it more difficult, but she’s able to maneuver your squirming form through the daily ritual of getting up, using the toilet, getting dressed, brushing your hair and teeth, and finally breakfast. Whenever she can, she has you laying on your stomach on the bed, and this is one thing you don’t protest.

You notice her shifting in discomfort the whole morning though, and despite how much you dislike her at the moment, you hate to see her in pain. You work up the courage to ask after a while of watching cartoons.

“Are you hurt?” you ask.

“I… well, I have a side effect from a treatment I had done that’s causing me discomfort,” she admits.

“I’m sorry,” you say. “That sucks.”

“There’s a way you can help me,” she says, sounding more timid than you’ve heard her maybe ever before.

“What is it?” you ask. To your confusion, she started to unbutton her shirt, and then she unclips her bra, but from the top? What?

“Huh?” you blurt out.

“I’m lactating,” she says simply, squeezing her nipple a little, causing a drop of what can only be breast milk to come of it.

“I—what do you want me to do about it?” you ask, dumbfounded.

“They hurt because they’re too full,” she explains. “And it would be really helpful if you would, well… empty them. I don’t have a breast pump, of course,” she says.

“Wait, like, you want me to—to drink your milk?” you’re turning bright red. Even after everything you’ve done with her, you’re almost unbearably embarrassed.

“Yes, baby, it would really help me, plus I think that you’ll like it. And it could help us…feel closer,” she chooses her words carefully, gauging your reaction.

“It’s kinda weirding me out,” you say honestly.

“Just try it, please, baby? It’ll help me feel so much better. And I promise, if you hate it after a little while then I’ll get a pump,” she crosses her fingers behind her back.

“I… okay,” you say. This whole situation is so absurd you can hardly bother trying to resist it. She smiles and adjusts the both of you to where you can reach her breast.

It’s not like you haven’t had her tits in your mouth before. You’re not sure why you’re so nervous right now. Natasha gently puts a hand on the back of your head and pushes you a little closer. You wrap your mouth around her nipple hesitantly, unsure of what to do.

“It’s like your bottle, sweetheart,” she senses your confusion. You tentatively begin sucking, and you’re surprised by the flow of milk into your mouth. You jerk back, but Natasha keeps your head in place, groaning in relief.

When the initial shock wears off, you realize she was right—you do like it. It’s warm and sweet, and the sucking action soothes you. You relax a little.

“That’s a good baby for mommy,” Natasha says gently, stroking your head with her thumb on the hand supporting you. “Do you like mommy’s milkies?” she asks. You nod, slipping into littlespace quickly as you drink from her. “Is it yummy?” she asks out of her own curiosity. You nod, not wanting to stop to answer. She chuckles. “It’s all yours, little one.”

She moves you to her other breast when you’ve finished, looking down and noticing that her other one is indeed smaller, and it certainly feels better now. You clutch at her gently to get a good angle, and her heart swells. She’s so glad this worked, but then again, Wanda’s advice has yet to fail her, so she shouldn’t be surprised.

When you finish, your eyelids are droopy and you nuzzle into her willingly, a rarity even before she fucked everything up. She pets you gently.

“Sleepy, little one?” she asks you softly. You nod. “Want a nap?” she asks. You nod again. Between your body being exhausted already and the soothing effects of her milk, she’s not surprised you’re already tired even though you’ve only been awake for a few hours. “Let mommy check your bottom, okay?” she turns you on your tummy. You’re healing nicely. “Do you want a blankie? I think it won’t hurt,” she says. You nod and she covers you with a blanket.

“Mommy stay,” you say when she gets up. And how is she supposed to argue with that? The answer is, she isn’t, so after she turns the lights off, he curls up next to you and holds you close.

“Mommy’s here, little one,” she assures you, finding your favorite stuffie and handing it to you. “Mommy will always be here, don’t you worry.”

#marvel #natasha x reader #mommy!natasha #dark!natasha #natasha romanoff #dark!mommy!natasha #dark!natasha romanoff x reader #mcu #mcu fic #x reader #x gender neutral reader #x trans reader #if you want #or not #avengers #no smut #hurt/comfort #angst #stockholm syndrome #little!reader #kidnapping #fanfic #writers on tumblr #noah writes sometimes

[issaxcharlie]

Someone To You

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Y/N and Luke have been friends for most of their lives and have already spent some time in love, but not knowing how to jump from friends to lovers, they have been stranded in that rare transition for much longer than they should, something that does not go unnoticed neither for them nor for the members of the rock band.

A lot of Luke and Y/N fluff, and a lot of friendship between Y/N and the Sunset Curve boys💖 (oh and my usual nonsense)

Word count: +3k

Songs used: Kiss me by Ed Sheeran and Follow You by Echosmith

Two in the morning and Y/N has been lying on her bed for twenty minutes trying to go back to sleep without any success. She is about to give up and go to get her journal when an unmistakable knock on the window echoes through the room.

She gets up and turns on the lamp before going to open the lock, her best friend entering the room seconds later and closing the window again before turning to her. The second they are face to face, Y/N lunges at him, entwining her legs tightly across his waist, her face buried completely in his neck, letting the familiarity of his body and scent wash over her.

“Oh god, I missed you.” He whispers in a husky voice, putting his hands on her hips and carefully kicking off his vans with his feet, then moving to her bed, dropping her gently on her usual side.

That's when he can see the girl's face with attention, her features slightly illuminated by the night lamp and making clear that she had been awake before he arrived.

“Difficult night eh?” He asks just before pushing his body forward to jump to the other side of the bed, and she lets out a sweet wholehearted laugh when he stumbles at the last second and ends up falling on his belly on her hips. “This was supposed to be way cooler and smoother.”

“I know Lu, maybe try to just walk next time?”

“Y/N, darlin’. Rockstars don’t just walk, we have to do everything with style.” He gets up and lightly kisses her on the cheek before stepping carefully around her to lie down on his side.

“My mistake, Lucas.” She teases with a smirk and he frowns before playfully sticking his tongue out at her. “Now, what happened? Whenever you appear at the window out of nowhere, it’s because you feel overwhelmed."

He analyzes what she said silently. All the times that he has entered through that window passing through his head, as well as all the hugs and cuddles received. All the years, and feelings and memories making him feel blessed to love her. "I guess you are right, you are my safe place." Y/N's face lights up, and she confidently moves closer to give him a soft kiss on the nose. “And you are mine. Now, spill, handsome.”

He smiles at the compliment, and makes an exaggerated wink that makes her snort. “My mom made me leave the house almost impossible, I was minutes away to miss the gig. I don't understand why it's so hard for her to understand that this is what I was born to do. If I want to be someone in this life, I have to continue on this path, no matter what. I don't want to die and just vanish, I want to leave a mark. We all want our lives to be great and to be remembered." Luke drops his head against the pillow and covers his eyes with his hands, letting his annoyance out.

“I get you, and you know I will always support you.”

“But…”

“But I just want you to know this. You are someone, Luke. To me, to Reggie, Alex, Bobby, and no matter how much you guys argue, you are someone to your parents. You don't need to connect with everyone to make an impact, just with the people who matter to you.”

He moves his hands behind his head and stares in silence at the ceiling for a few seconds, and then turns to see her with the most charming smile in his repertoire. “Will you come to the Orpheum after we nail the audition?” Anyone would be disconcerted by his attitude, but for Y/N it is a typical Luke Patterson defense mechanism. Whenever he feels like the conversation is getting too heavy or when he just doesn't want to respond, he drastically changes the subject with his best smile to try and distract her.

“Of course I will, It’ll be one of the most important days of your life, I would never miss it. And I would not change you singing in my ear for anything, but there is something so special when you are on stage, it is like being in front of the microphone sets your soul on fire.” She replies with a delighted smile.

"I totally get what you mean. So, you like me to sing you to sleep, huh? C’mere beautiful." He requests before trapping her against him, his calloused fingers quickly finding her hair, stroking it gently as he sings in her ear.

“Settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in. Lie down with me, and hold me in your arms” He stops for a second to meet her eyes again and give her a light kiss on the forehead, before confidently singing the chorus. “Kiss me like you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved, you wanna be loved. This feels like falling in love, falling in love, falling in love.”

Y/N smiles against his neck before finally falling asleep, the peace Luke always gives her completely invading her and melting her in his arms.

In the morning Y/N snaps her eyes open when she raises her arm to wrap her best friend’s waist and finds the space empty. She sits down and finds a note on her nightstand, Luke's unmistakable handwriting peeking out due to a poorly folded sheet.

“Good morning darlin’, sorry for leaving without saying goodbye, I had to go to the last rehearsal before the auditions. After that we will pick you up to go celebrate <3

PS: you look so hot while you drool my shoulder and the pillows."

-Luke

The girl can't help but blush, and furiously examines the pillow to see if she actually did it, only to find another little note below it.

“Gotcha.” She rolls her eyes and a little laugh escapes her lips.

Today is a ridiculously important day in the lives of the boys, if they manage to be among the 10 chosen for the second part of the contest, they will compete in the legendary Orpheum for the opportunity to land a record deal.

The four of them have been working like crazy even though the situation with their families has been getting worse in recent weeks, none of them have even thought about giving up. Without much to do during her day off, Y/N allows herself to remember the feeling of being in Luke's arms, the conversation she had with Alex and Bobby just a few days before in the back of her head.

“Why are we doing this again?” Alex asks clearly annoyed while Bobby and Y/N laugh, turning to see Luke and Reggie jamming some songs across the sidewalk, in front of one of the hottest clubs in LA.

“Something about making the band better known before auditions.” she reports, as she closes the buttons on Luke's bleached jean jacket she's wearing.

“I understand that, but couldn’t he wait til tomorrow? We practiced all day, I’m tired as fuck.” The blond replies, getting irritated from exhaustion.

Bobby yawns, his eyes getting heavier as he rests his head in Y/N’s shoulder. “Muffin, I swear, your man has infinite energy.”

“He is not my man, Bobs.” She answers as she rests her head on his, ruffling his hair gently.

"Well maybe you should let him know, because he refers to you as his girl all the time." Bobby informs her, raising his head to see her reaction.

“He does?” Even in the dark both boys can see how red her cheeks are, and how the smile on her face grows with each passing second. Bobby decides to take a chance and keep teasing her.

“My girl is so insanely talented, that’s my sweet girl, my girl said this and I thought it was so freaking awesome because I’m hopelessly in love with her.”

“Man, that was so accurate. 10/10.” Alex replies while laughing, they lean in to highfive above her head, and she can't help but blush even more at her friend's words.

“You guys are the worst.” She wrinkled her nose and they both turned to see each other, agreeing silently that now is the moment to ask one of the questions they had wanted to ask her for months.

“Since we met you are in this strange relationship, in which you are both aware that you are in love with each other, but neither of you does anything. What are you waiting for?" Bobby asks, indicating Alex to support him with his eyes.

“Yeah bro after 3 years, it gets kind of old.” He adds, trying to sound cool.

“I guess, we just think it is not the right time. Since you started the band he has worked tirelessly on his career as a musician and that is what I want him to focus on. We both know what is in our hearts and for now that is more than enough.” She blurts out, trying to get her thoughts in order.

“That was so cheesy I want to die.” Alex answers in reflex, and his eyes go wide when he realizes what he said.

“Oh my God, Alex. Go away! I will never open my soul to you again.”

The girl blushes again, a small smile at the corner of her lips as she remembers how after that her friends continued to tease her with Luke and called her Mrs Patterson for the rest of the night, both she and Luke totally embarrassed when they continued to tease them in the truck on the way home. She decides to get out her notebook and try to write a song, which she hadn't done since Luke formed Sunset Curve, and by the time she finished she had just some minutes before the boys arrived.

She managed to get ready in time, but what she found when she opened the door was not what she expected. The face that greeted her was Reggie's and not Luke's as always, and the sad little smile on the bassist's face wasn't normal either.

She instantly hugs him, making soft circles with her fingertips on his iconic leather jacket.

“Don’t worry about me, sunshine, I’m fine. But he needs you.” He takes her hand and walks toward Bobby's old truck, and Y/N is even more confused when she meets his beaming smile as they climb into the back of the vehicle. Alex is smiling too, but he looks clearly anxious, and Luke is nowhere to be found.

"Can someone explain to me what happened? Where is Luke?"

“We did it, muffin!” He embraces her excitedly, his clear happiness reassuring the stressed girl.

“Congrats guys! I’m so proud of you!” He released her and she hugs Reggie with her left arm and with her free one takes Alex's hand, who takes it in his and fondly kisses her knuckles.

“Thank you Y/N, but going back to Luke, we need your help. Things didn't go as smoothly as we expected and how to put it nicely… he lost it.” The blond informs her while anxiously playing with his necklace.

“You are the one who always shows him the way.” Reggie says with a bigger smile this time.

“Okay, start the truck Bobs, my man needs me.” Alex snorts a laugh and Bobby fulfills her request after smiling teasingly at her.

“You told Bobby he wasn’t your man.” Alex remarked with a smirk, turning his head toward the back seat to look into her eyes.

“And you told the boy at the club that you didn't know Reggie so you wouldn't have to give him his number. What's your point?” She answered swiftly with a mirrored smirk.

The drummer tries to counter attack but fails miserably, instead whispers a “...Well played.” and looks back to the front of the road.

“Was he cute?” Reg asks with genuine curiosity, and they all debate whether the boy was Reggie’s type or not on the way to where Luke is.

The boys leave her in the big park where the girl already imagined her best friend was, and she walks directly to the place where they sat millions of times throughout her childhood and adolescence, in their little corner of paradise. It doesn't take her long to find a disgruntled Luke sitting against their tree with his guitar three feet away, lying on the grass.

“You look so hot when you are frustrated.” Luke looks up and calms down when he meets her eyes. “I think you are the one who needs a song to relax now.” She adds, pointing out at the guitar. He nods and she picks it up, sitting between Luke's legs, her back leaning against his chest.

She blushes as she begins to play the song she finished composing just an hour ago, grateful that he can't see her face because of the position they are in. “I thank God for you all the time. Someone who knows my faults, but loves me despite them all. And you, I'll follow you just like that. Doesn't matter how far, If I have you, I have it all.”

She feels him kissing her hair, his heart beating just as fast as her own. “I think I found my soulmate, yes I do. I think I found the one who knows me. I don't wanna think about what it'd be like without you. Anywhere, I’ll follow you anywhere.”

When the song ends she freezes for a few seconds and Luke takes the opportunity to take the guitar and move it to the side, so that he can hug her closer to him, his arms around her waist while his chin rests on her shoulder.

“Your voice always shows me the way home.” Luke whispers sweetly in her ear, and Y/N instantly remembers Reggie said something similar in the truck, which means Luke had probably already expressed that thought to his friends, causing her to melt in his arms. She guesses it’s her turn to apply the famous Luke Patterson defense mechanism.

“What happened? I know you guys did pass, Bobby was so happy he wanted to cry.”

“We passed literally with the last ticket. They said they couldn’t see Sunset Curve, just another wannabe garage band, definitely not material for the big leagues.”

“Wow, that’s rough. And how did you react?”

"Reggie and Bobby held me by the arms and Alex by the back to stop me from going berserker." She smiles softly, imagining the scene clearly, and stretches her neck to see the guitarist's face.

“Lu, what else is bothering you?” He looks deep in thought, like he's forming multiple ideas in his head.

“I don't approve of everything they said, but I think maybe they have a point. I spent so much time trying to get the band to be material for a discography that I neglected our essence."

“Okay, then what’s the next move?”

“I have an idea, but I can’t do it without you.” He admits, staring deeply at her with his beautiful hazel eyes.

“Good thing you don’t have to. Luke, remember when we first met?” She asks, trying to distract him from his problems at least for today.

“Yeah, we were six. I told you I wanted to be a rockstar, and you said Lucas wasn’t a rockstar name, that I had to change it immediately.” He recalls with a soft smile.

“After that day you got angry every time someone dared to call you by your name.” She remembers the scene with a laugh.

“You have to admit, little Y/N was wise, you wouldn't have a band if you were still a Lucas.” He chuckles, caressing her hair lovingly., and she leans at the touch.”

“From that day I knew that I always wanted to be by your side. All my life I have tried to be someone, someone for my parents, for my friends, for the public, but I have never had to try with you.

I've always been someone for you... and that's more than enough. You've always known who I am, even when I'm not sure myself. You have always been patient and have loved me unconditionally, and I want you to know that you can always expect the same from me. god, I know since I was a kid I would do anything for you. I need you, I’m tired to wait for the correct moment, because every moment with you feels right.”

“Lu… is this a love confession?”

“I- yeah. But it’s so hard, I feel so many emotions right now and I really want to kiss the hell out of yo-” Y/N pulls him towards her connecting their lips hungrily, both melting into each other's mouths. He bites her lower lip slightly and separates a few seconds to admire her face, her eyes shining with love and lust.

“Darlin’, you can admit now your thing for rockstars. That’s exactly how you see me when I’m on stage.”

“I’ll admit it as soon as you admit you pretended to drown in the pool last year so I could give you mouth-to-mouth.”

“I would never do something like that… again.” They both laugh adoringly and Luke kisses her hard, determined to make up for all the lost time.

“Hey lovebirds, it’s time to go, Alex is minutes ago to snap at Reg and I don't want to end in the middle again, Reggie bit me last time.” They part abruptly, looking up at Bobby with daggers in their eyes.

“You can’t be all annoying all the time about our relationship and then ruin a moment like that.” she says clearly frustrated.

“Wow, eager much, muffin? someone is already whipped huh?” He jokes, causing Luke to put his finger in his mouth and then in his friend's ear.

“Bobby If you don’t shut up I swear-” She starts to fight, but he interrupts her.

“Are you guys dating now?” They both turn to see each other and smile, Luke wipes his hand on Bobby's shirt as they start to walk to the truck and entwine it with Y/N’s.

“Yeah, yes we are.” He declares with a majestic smile.

“Dammit I lost the bet to Alex. He said this was finally the year and I bet on another five.”

“Five? Really?” The girl asks, unable to believe what she hears.

“What? You have been in this strange relationship for about 12 years, five more years would be easy peasy. Reggie bet that you would make your lives with someone else and meet in 20 years to realize that it was always you." He informs them as they reach the vehicle, she looks in shock for a moment but then recovers and feings anger.

“Yeah, that’s it we are walking.” She decides, pulling Luke onto the sidewalk.

“You're just looking for an excuse to make out with your new boyfriend, you never get mad at us, not even the time Reggie stuck gum in your hair.” Bobby calls her out, and Reggie rolls the window down to emphasize that it was an accident.

“Okay yeah, I want to make out with my boyfriend and stick my tongue down his throat because as you mentioned, I've been waiting for many years to be able do it. So get lost or admire the show.” Reggie quickly closes the window again, and Bobby makes a disgusted face before almost running to the driver's seat.

“I’m so in love with you.” He admits with loving eyes, and she stands on tiptoe to fill him with light kisses on the forehead, nose, cheeks and lips. “I’m so in love with you, Lu.”

“Hey darlin’, I know you said the tongue in the throat thing to scare them away but…” He tries to explain himself, but she stops him knowing exactly what he wants to say.

“Oh, don’t worry. I’m kissing the hell out of you as soon as we get home.” She reassures, caressing his hand.

He lets out a big sigh of relief. “Good.” A big smile on his face while pressing her hand a little harder to make sure this is actually happening.

Thanks for reading ✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning, @strangerthanfanfiction713 @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc @bibliophilewednesday @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1 @lukeys-giggle @katie-navarro @crybabyddl @cocopuffs0211 @marvel-ousnesss @tuttigunner @dpaccione @justalittleweirdoo

#luke patterson x reader #luke patterson imagine #luke patterson x y/n #luke patterson fic #luke patterson oneshot #luke patterson #luke jatp #jatp luke #luke patterson fanfiction #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie imagines #charlie gillespie x y/n #charlie gillespie fic #jatp imagine #julie and the phantoms