#....COULD be ~normal ~ a lot longer than ciel ever did for himself

[earlgreybocchan]

Anyway good morning.

#unpacking these four chapters of breakup that happened almost twenty years ago in several different formats #starving for madam red content especially ik she's been dead (as dead as anyone on black butler has ever been) forever but like. #i don't understand how so much of this comment section got out of this that madam red just wanted to be ~normal~ #when a lot of her deal and ciel's is that she physically can't/wasn't ever going to be and i genuinely think ciel realized these things... #...about himself a long time before madam red did and that's why she struggles with a lot of it so much. bc she held onto the idea she... #....COULD be ~normal ~ a lot longer than ciel ever did for himself #i think that factors for a lot of grell's side of the breakup too #grell also realized that about herself early on AND she could tell that about madam red the minute she saw her #like everyone dying wasn't the cause madam red couldn't be normal it was just more evidence of it #and i think it might have hurt grell's feelings that madam red was still holding on to what was never going to be when for grell they... #...were perfect for each other in every way and madam red backing out of the killing meant she was backing out on her too #it says soooo much that grell found madam red at her worst and she liked that and everything that madam red thought people looked down on... #....her for grell just revels in #also i wish redacted would die again <3 hate his guts the whole situation is so sinister regardless of how doomed madam red is #kuroshitsuji #my kuro posts #redcliff #madam red #Youtube

[hobbit-in-kuroshitsuji]

Kuroshitcember 2022 Prompt Nr. 23 - Christmas Special 1/3

prompt: Sebastian thinks about his life before his contract with Ciel.

You can find all prompts here!

All of these will be uploaded/archived to this blog's Ao3 eventually

📌Because I ended up not being able to participate in quite a lot of prompts lately, I decided to put together a 3 part little story for 23rd, 24th, and 25th of December, each chapter inspired by that day's prompt. I tried incorporating as many characters as I could <3 I hope you enjoy!! I hope I can keep up writing after Christmas though <3 these prompts have been amazing, and it's been so much fun participating <3

Summary: As Christmas Eve draws to its end, Ciel Phantomhive finds out that his demon butler had a past unlike any the boy could have ever imagined. This means Ciel's Christmas takes a drastic turn, which invites things to go both right and wrong... CW: kuroshitsuji spoilers (if you don't know about o!ciel and r!ciel, do not read this 3 parter!!), mentions death, suicide, anatomy study, workhouses - please be careful if you are easily triggered by real events that happened in the past. oh, if you don't ship Vincent/Undertaker, please don't send hate <3 it's just a fleeting mention, but still <3

“The what?”

Ciel’s one eye flickered over to glare at Sebastian. The question was not a rude one, but Ciel’s patience had been somewhat thin as of late. Memories flooded Ciel during the entire month of December which wore down both his mood and his mental health.  

First it had been his birthday; a reminder of his brother and the loss of affection and remembrance toward his own dead self buried somewhere no one came to visit (to his knowledge)…

Then it had been faint memories of past holidays, with family near and warmth all around a child’s innocent mind.

What was usually the time for a human to get acquainted with the world from behind the protective barrier of parents had been shattered a long time ago, and the bitterness of the loss of a child’s innocence seeped into the holiday instead.

Ciel Phantomhive no longer cared for Christmas, and Sebastian had not had to care about Christmas for any other reason then to keep up appearances of a household serving a philanthropist wishing to remain out of the spotlight, and a kind-hearted lord.

“The Foundation of Timmy.” Desk filled with letters ranging from ‘Merry Christmas’ cards, to bills, to civilians appealing for more time to pay rent, to complaints about the land… Ciel favoured one letter in his hand which would turn the tide for that year’s Christmas. Because of that letter, Ciel was not the only one suddenly overwhelmed with memories. “It’s a charity giving to the poor in London. They’re hosting a special charity during the holiday season to give presents, food, warm clothes, that sort of thing.”

“Let me guess,” Sebastian spoke, voice slightly quieter than normal, pupils ten sizes smaller, and fangs out for show – “They pay special attention to the workhouses of London…”

“Yes.” Ciel thought little of this. Outwardly he didn’t care for his demon’s emotions anyway, and his act meant that he didn’t notice how this was affecting Sebastian. Besides, it was a logical conclusion. The workhouses were on the top of the list when looking for places to go and be charitable.

“They do not mention the Jewish communities?”

Ciel blinked at this question though. “The Jewish…? Well, yes. There’s a separate fund for Hanukkah. It offers the Jewish community funding for those living in the industrial areas… We have missed it this year, though. It ended on the 4th of December.”

“Yes…” Sebastian said no more, and instead busied himself with collecting opened letters from Ciel’s desk to try and tidy up.

“How did you know this?” Ciel looked between demon and letter, glancing at the charity’s symbol: a crest held up by a crow cawing. Within the crest, the letter T was printed.

A mere guess, my lord was what Sebastian wanted to say. Alas, he had been prompted not to lie to his master. Through a fake smile attempting to offer the aesthetic of him being calm and in control of his own emotions – which Sebastian despised he even had – the demon said: “Timothy Smith was a previous contract of mine. In your human, Christian calendar it would have been between the years of 1698 to 1705.”

Shocked and astounded to suddenly hear something about Sebastian’s past on Earth, Ciel stood up in such a rush that the chair tumbled over behind him. With one wide eye, Ciel stared at the demon, who pretended nothing had been said and simply continued to clean.

“Sebastian,” Ciel pointed out, only to find he had no clue of what to ask. He wanted to know all of it, really. Who was Timmy? How old had he been? How had he summoned a demon? Where did they live? Had Timothy been a noble too from the start? Did demons only go for nobles?

For some strange reason though, the only question that formed on Ciel’s tongue was what that contract had entailed. Whether Ciel done right by himself was something he still pondered over. Could he have done better in negotiating terms and conditions with a demon?

Had someone else cracked the code before him?

“What were the conditions?”

“Pardon?” Sebastian paused his cleaning, almost looking offended.

Maybe it was offensive to ask such things to a demon – Ciel didn’t know. He didn’t speak demon language nor did he know anything about their culture – nor did Ciel want to know about their anything. It was a demon. A foul creature with the sole intention of pulling humans down to hell for consumption.

So, Ciel continued despite the offense. “What was your contract about?”

Sebastian’s nostrils flared once, then he seemed to straighten up further than humanly possible – as if to keep something back, a rude comment… maybe…

“Timothy asked me to be his father.”

And now Ciel was just confused.

“Huh?”

“Timothy was a little boy, younger than you, who was taken from a workhouse in 1688 by men of science attempting to understand human anatomy. Taken to a university for the sole purpose of being murdered and cut open, one scientist took pity on the boy before he could hit the nail through the boy’s skull.” There was venom behind Sebastian’s words, a venom which Ciel noted he had never heard before…. Except for once when Sebastian scolded Ciel for not letting him help clean Ciel up, perhaps only a few hours after their contract had initially been created. Ciel had still been hurt then… and… wounds can get infected. This part of Sebastian’s past had become an infected wound too.

He cared.

Demons shouldn’t care… right?

“He took Timothy to a different department. One not researching human anatomy, but the human soul. One thing led to another, and they summoned me… not a human soul.” Sebastian once more looked offended at the mere idea, taking on a pose of superiority toward human souls.

Ciel rolled his eyes at it.

“Small as he was, the child asked for a father. One who would protect, and in doing so figure out what had actually happened to his real family. He didn’t quite understand the reality of the creature he was negotiating with.” Looking away from Ciel, Sebastian remained silent until his master prompted for the rest of the story.

“But you were only with him for seven years?”

“Boys grow a lot in seven years. Eventually, I, as his father, saw it fit for him to find out the truth about his parents. Once Timothy was old enough, the two of us did just so.”

“And…?” Ciel prompted again, waving a hand impatiently.

“They were nothing but a whore and a marine who had needed a relief one day.” Ciel frowned in disgust. “But, it turned out that the marine came from a wealthy family, and so I claimed Timothy’s heritage for him.”

Cocking an eyebrow, Ciel asked in a bored tone: “You mean you killed every single one then made Timothy the formal heir?”

“Yes. Obviously.” Sebastian smirked at Ciel’s wittiness. “You know me well, my lord.”

“It seemed the only thing a demon would do.”

“’Tis a Christmas miracle! You, my lord, offering me such compliments is unheard of.”

“Revolting.” Ciel turned to walk back to the window. Outside, it didn’t feel much like a Christmas miracle. It was raining, barely a degree below zero… There would be no snow this year, he assumed.

Which meant it would be the first year since his parents’ death that he wouldn’t have a white Christmas. The conversation he had with Sebastian was what he clung to in order to keep from feeling sadness over something as childish and pathetic as snow.

“Timothy enjoyed the snow too,” Sebastian said.

Unsure what had prompted this, Ciel turned and offered his demon a confused look.

“All children’s minds are alike,” he explained simply. “All children wish the same thing.”

Ciel nodded, for once not taking offense to the fact that he was being called a child. “I agree. Therefore, Sebastian, I want you to arrange that any funds we can spare are offered to the Foundation of Timmy this year.”

There was a millisecond where Ciel could detect a hint of gratitude and relief from the demon, before it disappeared as Sebastian smiled and bowed.

“As you wish, my lord.”

“And…” Ciel frowned, tapping one of the letters. “That warehouse that suffered water damage?” Blasted English weather. “How much of the toys stored there were damaged beyond repair?”

“A mere two percent, sir.”

“Then I would like all undamaged goods to be shipped to the workhouses of London…” Ciel watched Sebastian for a bit, pondering whether this was a good idea. “Is the one where Timothy came from still running?”

“I- Yes, sir.”

“Then why don’t we make a personal visit?”

“Sir?”

“Christmas among nobility is all about giving presents no one needs. Most of them are returned to the store, exchanged for something they wanted, or forgotten. Then we eat a bunch of things no one can finish, and the leftovers are thrown out.” Sebastian refrained from correcting his master in that, in actuality, the servants tended to finish Christmas dinners at estates, holding a little party past midnight after their work was done…

“But the party –“

“We’ll be back in time. I just…” Ciel frowned. “What you said… About the scientists… Does it still happen?”

“Yes, my lord. It might not be legal anymore to claim living subjects, but it still happens.”

“Then I want to be there. It’s Christmas. People are at home and law enforcement is scathe. It would be ripe time for people to claim children from workhouses. Make it happen, Sebastian.”

“Yes, my lord,” Sebastian agreed, bowing down as Ciel walked past him to leave the office.

Outside, the rain slowly turned to snow. Sebastian watched it, not being able to help feel a sense of warmth within him at the memory of a former master unknowingly manipulating Sebastian into becoming a father… caring for the boy… It was a contract that clearly had long lasting impact on the demon.

And now, Ciel offered a gentle touch to the memory, honouring Timmy…

Sebastian would never admit it out loud, but this Christmas Miracle was quite the pleasant surprise.

__ taglist: @eemoo1o-animoo

#kuroshitcember #hobbit's kuroshitcember 2022 #black butler #kuroshitsuji #ciel phantomhive #kuroshitsuji spoilers #o!ciel #sebastian michaelis #dadbastian #definitely dadbastian throughout lmao #more characters will appear tomorrow ;) #oh it's gonna be a mess lmao XD I hope you're all prepared XD #scheduled

[animeyanderelover]

Hello! Welcome to The Yandere Fandom! And Tumblr! I hope you enjoy it here. Can I request headcanons with Black Butler characters? Like how did they first met they darlings and what made them fall in love in the first place? With Alois, Claude, Grell, Will, Sebastian and Undertaker if possible?Not sure how many characters I can request...

I love using Tumblr😁! You can request a maximum of 10 characters so basically a bunch of ‘em. By the way, this Hc’s might contradict in some points with the basic Hc’s I wrote about this characters because in them I didn’t focus that much about who their darling is.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, paranoia, delusions, stalking, clinginess

Hc’s when meeting and falling for the s/o

Alois Trancy

👅I believe that he met you somewhere outside the mansion, for example in a village near the manor.

👅He was in a bit tricky situation at that time, for example being pestered by some people who wanted his money and cornered him. Of course Claude could have helped him, but suddenly Alois heard yelling from behind him and that’s when he saw the s/o for the first time. They quickly stepped in front of Alois and cursed at the villagers for treating a young man with such disrespect.

👅Alois was amazed at that. You didn’t even know him, but were willing to protect him even though you were clearly outnumbered? Surprisingly the guys left, probably because all the yelling had drawn already too much attention and everyone was staring at you.

👅His darling quickly turned to him, asking if he was okay and apologized for this guy’s behavior. They felt terrible about it and were ready to make it up for him so they basically assisted Alois for the rest of the day, showing him around the village and even going as far as buying him something he wanted, of course only if they had enough money for it. And after a day were Alois spent more time in the village than originally planned he left together with Claude, the s/o waving after his carriage.

👅Alois fell that day for your incredible kindness and your will to protect those in need. He never experienced much kindness in his life, but you... You showed him that not all people are just after his money! He made a mental note to himself to visit this village more often. That’s when he started falling into his dark desires that would cost later on the lifes of many innocent.

Claude Faustus

🕷Claude met the s/o somewhere outside as well. There’s no chance that you’re a maid because I don’t think that humans would survive very long in this manor...

🕷He was getting someone for his master at that time when suddenly an exquisite scent hit his nose. Claude had a hard time to not let his eyes turn pink. He immediately started looking around, searching for the source of the sweet smell. Then he found the source of the scent and with it the s/o.

🕷They had somehow managed to hurt themself and blood was seeping out of their wounds. It took all of Claude’s willpower to not grab this human and lick their wound clean. Instead he offered his help and started cleaning and bandaging the wound. The s/o happily thanked him for his help and ran off to somewhere else, Claude’s eyes following them until they disappeared in the crowd.

🕷His gaze turned to his now slightly red tainted gloves. The scent was nearly driving him crazy and he quickly ran into a secluded alley and was finally able to taste some of your blood. His eyes turned immediately pink and his jaw dropped. Their soul... If Claude needed to describe it he would say that it tasted like a bright burning flame made of passion, love and innocence. He licked greedily his gloves clean, not leaving a single smear of blood over. This soul was better than anything he had ever tasted in his whole life and he had lived a very long life. This soul was amazing! Fantastic! Marvelous! And most important, HIS!

🕷The thing that made Claude obsessed with you was your soul. He wanted it for himself! But what was at first just the pure greed and desire for that soul turned later on in an unhealthy obsession for the owner of the soul itself, YOU!

Grell Sutcliff

🟥She met you when she was pretending to be Madam Red’s butler. The s/o is most likely an old friend and she met them on some party where her and Madam Red were invited to.

🟥Grell was at that that time pretending to be really clumsy and this wasn’t different on the party. She helped the other servants in the house with serving drinks and food on the party, but always messed up and spillled everything on the plates on the floor. The guests and other servants started complaining, calling her unsuited for being a butler. It wasn’t like she cared, but what surprised her was when her s/o suddenly interfered all the jeering.

🟥She stood in front of Grell and looked threatingly down on the guests and servants. The scene somehow looked like a momma bear protecting her little one from any danger. All people shut up because of the dangerous glint in their eyes. After that Grell’s darling started scolding Grell as well, but for some strange reason helped her for the rest of the party with everything. Grell was surprised how talented they were with all this even though they were a noble themself.

🟥What she also found really fascinating was their rough and impulsive character. A pure hothead who quickly lashed out on everyone with harsh words, it looked like everyone on the party was afraid of them. But at the same time Grell catched on on the s/o’s more softer actions they were showing her. Of course they threw harsh words at her, but always helped her with cleaning the mess up she made. This made her feel special.

🟥Grell fell for you because you were strong headed and defended her even though she seemed like a hopeless case. She also loved that you were showing her your softer side. After that she was already incredibly fond of you, but that would worsen even more later on.

William T. Spears

📒William met his darling the first time when he was following his target who was about to die that day.

📒He was quietly observing the person from the distance, watching how they suddenly walked in front of a carriage just about to collide with it when suddenly someone sprinted towards them and pushed them away, saving them. This person was no other than the s/o.

📒William was shocked to say the least. Impossible! It was written down that his target was going to die today, but they saved him. William was at first annoyed to say the least. Great, this means more paperwork. He observed the s/o, angry with them for saving that person and giving him more work. But somehow he was also curious, after all it doesn’t happen everyday that a human saves another from their death. He decided to watch you for a bit longer. At least then all of this wouldn’t have been a complete waste of time.

📒William watched you as planned and he discovered that something about you...fascinated him. What exactly was it? Was it the s/o’s bubbly and energetic way of being? They were the exact opposite of him and normally he found people like them annoying and exhausting, but somehow they managed to make it oddly fascinating for him.

📒Will was at first interested in you because you saved someone from a written down death in his book and after watching you he became interested in you as a person. You were somehow...refreshing to him. He was quick to catch on his interest for you and decided to avoid you before this would turn into something more. But if he would have known at that time how fatal it would be to deny his emotions he probably could have prevented the happening of future events.

Sebastian Michaelis

🐈‍⬛I believe that his darling is a servant themself for Ciel.

🐈‍⬛At some point Ciel needed another capable servant in the manor who wouldn’t burn his mansion down when he was away with Sebastian so he started searching for such a person until he believed to have found just the right one. He informed Sebastian and the others about the s/o’s arrival and ordered Sebastian to introduce them to everything.

🐈‍⬛Sebastian was prepared for a lot, but not for this splendid scent that hit his nose when you arrived, he nearly lost it then and there. But with every last bit of his self control he managed to not do something stupid that would have brought him troubles with his master. He introduced himself politely and started showing the s/o around the manor, his mind starting to feel hazy due to their smell that he nearly missed another thing that was very pleasant about the s/o besides their magnificent scent.

🐈‍⬛Sebastian noticed that the s/o moved in a very graceful and elegant way that he had so far only seen by cats. This sparked his curiosity with them even more and he started a conversation with them, showing a genuine interest in them. And ohh...this human managed to shock him. Not only their way of moving, but even their way of speaking was elegant and graceful! What a charming and witty little thing his master had found there. A true feline!

🐈‍⬛Just like Claude the first thing that attracted Sebastian to you was your scent. But he also became attracted to your cat like charm. He found you fascinating, but even he couldn’t have imagined that later on he would crave you like a human craved his drugs, being addicted to all of you.

Undertaker

⚰️His s/o was a costumer that visited his shop someday.

⚰️Undertaker hadn’t expected much when the door to his shop opened and a new costumer walked in, asking for a coffin because some of their relatives had died recently. Undertaker informed them about his assortment of coffins and which ones were more suitable. In his eyes it was just a normal and boring day.

⚰️But the s/o didn’t leave after they ordered the coffin. They just stayed in his shop, walking around and looking at everything with a glint of curiosity in their eyes. Undertaker watched them confused which the s/o noticed and quickly started explaining that they found the theme death and afterlife very interesting and admitted to even like spending time in graveyards. Now this caught Undertaker’s attention and he started a conversation with them.

⚰️And his conversation with them brightened his whole day up! The way they were so fascinated about death and afterlife and the way they were looking at things made this guy feel thrilled. Finally! Finally someone interesting! He couldn’t remember that he had ever seen someone with a similar mindset they had. The s/o had a very unique charm which pulled him in immediately. He was more than disappointed when they left the shop.

⚰️Your weird way of seeing and judging things around you plus your unique charm led Undertaker to have a morbid fascination with you. It was like he saw for the first time in his grey world colors. And he already knew at that time that he yearned for more of the colorful you.

#yandere black butler #yandere kuroshitsuji #yandere alois #yandere alois trancy #yandere claude #yandere claude faustus #yandere grell #yandere grell sutcliff #yandere william #yandere william t. spears #yandere sebastian #yandere sebastian michaelis #yandere undertaker

[bapydemonprincess]

♚ ✤ ✂ for Mey

I uh, decided to put a cut because they all ended up a big lengthy for just one ask, but well ... hope you like dear!!! 😅 It was certainly fun writing these!

✂ - a vivid memory

She was alone and catching her breath in the field, in the middle of the English Countryside, mind already thinking of the ways she could just run off, maybe jump on a ship, get on a train... She needed to escape, and escape now. Her failed attempt was something that would haunt her forever, for it was the first time she’d ever failed, even after being so close, and waiting SO LONG!

But suddenly she overhears something in the distance, and looks out to the field to see... A MAN coming her way??? He’s running faster than she’d EVER seen a human being run, and he looks familiar- Wait. Wait. No. NO!! IT’S THE BUTLER FROM THAT MANOR????

Rin quickly tries to aim at the man and fire as fast as she can, but her targets have never been THIS FAST. He avoids them easily, leaping away like a graceful fawn. And soon, very soon, he is RIGHT in front of her, some shining kind of blades between his fingers and ready to STRIKE!!

But he hits something else, and the assassin turns to see the familiar face of Dove collapse right behind her, dead. Simple silverware knives are sticking out of various parts and in his hand is a knife of his own. He was about to KILL her.

And then Rin turns around just as she hears something very unusual, it reminds her of clattering horse hooves, it reminds her of crowds of people talking in London, it reminds her of running water as well. How could one thing sound like so many different things??

And yet, whatever it is, it grins at her, all black and inky, and growls out “I was finally able to meet you!” in a strangely delighted voice.

And then everything goes

Black.

✤ - a memory that involves romance/love

Mey Rin enjoys watching the strange man known as Sebastian Michaelis do such menial tasks. She isn’t faking the feeling she feels inside as she watches him cook briefly, or when he has to set the table, or when he’s looking right into her eyes as he keeps her from collapsing!

He’s beautiful to watch, and Mey Rin has never gotten a chance to.. appreciate someone’s physically form until now. And oh, such a form! She imagines the things he can do in different situations too. How he would wash himself in a bath, how he’d get undressed for bed, or redressed for a day, how he’d crawl into bed and curl up under the covers, like some big version of a cat or something! Wait, there are big cats... Tigers?.... Panther! Ooooo, yes, definitely like a panther!!

She sighs and shifts around in place, just imagining those things, and sometimes when her mind really wanders off... she kind of forgets she has a JOB TO DO!!!

She has a letter to deliver to the butler, and she finds him standing in the middle of the upstairs hallway, looking thoughtful... 

Ah.. he looks so lovely in the sun beams of the window...

But oh, oh! The LETTER!!

“Mr. Sebastian! Mr. Sebastian!!” She calls out, finally close enough.

“What is it now, Mey Rin? Do calm down..”

“There’s a letter for you, Mr. Sebastian, it’s--” And suddenly she’s tripping, falling, forward and RIGHT INTO THE BUTLER!!!

She feels his body, his firm abdomen and chest as her head pushes into it, but she also feels herself and him falling.

Is there glass shattering, too?? Why???

Groaning, she straightens up from the fall, and soon feels under her no flatness of a hallway floor but... firmness.. of... of... S-S-SEBASTIAN’S LAP!!!

“The letter, Mey Rin.” He simply says while lying there with the maid on top of him.

And She nearly SHRIEKS just from the fact that he is LETTING her stay on top of him like this!

“...Here..” She manages.. and practically faints just as he takes the letter from her hand.

Oh, was this a scenario that was bound to happen working here??? Would there be more instances like this???

“Oy, Sebastian, what’re you ‘n Mey Rin doin’?!” She hears Bardroy suddenly, and realizes the Butler’s hands are on her waist, firm. Squeezing as he lifts her easily and stands himself.

He smiles to the other two servants while holding Mey Rin close, practically leaning her limp form up against his own.

“Everything’s fine, just a minor incident.” The Butler purrs with a dashing smile.

And Mey Rin swears her soul is going to just leave her body now...

♚ - a memory of something paranormal

The manor is definitely not haunted by the fallen souls of those from the tragic fire that struck it. No way. It couldn’t be! The manor is old after all, and Mey Rin is sure it’s seen a lot of people die again and again! And she would’ve seen something by now if it was anyway! She had a keen instinct for things like this, yes she did!

However, one night she does hear something.. but it’s not anything she’d imagined hearing when it comes to the dead haunting a house. Not a moan or a sob or a call for someone..

It’s...

It sounds like a dog.

It sounds exactly like there’s just a DOG out in the hallway! And Mey Rin immediately assumes maybe Finny just found a stray dog and let the thing in!

She groans and gets up after a few seconds of hearing the dog right outside her door, and peeks out into the hall.

...

Nothing.

It’s not there at all. There’s absolutely no dog. And the hall is completely empty!

Frowning, Mey Rin tries to think on this a second.. before shaking her head and just going back to bed.

In the daylight, while everyone in the downstairs kitchen is “breaking fast” as Sebastian loves calling it, Mey Rin finally decides to ask the others on it, despite how.. weird she knows it’ll be.

“Did either of you two ‘ear a dog outside or in the hallway last night??”

“Er... no, didn’ even wake up anytime, really. Y’know I sleep like a log ‘till the Butler comes ‘round.” Bardroy replies, looking utterly baffled at this subject.

“Aw, no, was there a doggy outside or somethin’, Mey Rin??” Finny asks.

“Well, I woke up to some barkin’ outside my door! I swear I did! It sounded so real, and I also swore I ‘eard a dog’s little feet tappin’!”

“Whoa..” Both the other two say, looking much more alert suddenly.

“Didja see the dog, Mey??” Finny asks straight away.

“No.. I went t’look out my door an.. there was nothing..” 

This really startles the boys, and they look from her to each other.

“...Well, shit..” Bard hisses as low as he can under his breath, and gets up to go out and light his smoke for once.

Finny looks down at the table, utterly baffled.

“So... so what was it, then? Was it a... dog you couldn’t see or somethin’?”

Mey Rin sighs and slouches.

“I was probably nothin’, Finny. Just me hearin’ things and my imagination gettin’ to me.”

“Huh.” Finny hums, and after a minute finally finishes his orange juice and hurries outside to get to work.

....

After a few quiet minutes, Bardroy- still slightly in the door but slightly outside -calls to her.

“Hey. Mey. C’mere a sec...”

Quietly, as she feels it’s oddly important to be so, Mey Rin goes over to him and looks up at him expectantly.

“You uh, gonna clean up the parlor by the stairs in a bit?”

Mey frowned, confused about such a question and what it had to do with anything and why he was asking...

“I might do...” She finally hissed back. “Why?”

“Well, while your in there, jus’... get a good look a’ the family photographs.. There’s one with the Main guy, Vincent, in a chair with his family gathered ‘round. And ah... just.. check it out, okay?”

Mey Rin felt a sudden flutter in her stomach. Oh god... Was.. was Bardroy saying that... possibly...

She went to the Parlor in question, and quietly accessed the entire room, just as she would with any room she was about to clean. However... 

There was a photograph, propped up right there on the fireplace, and it was just like how Bard described.

There was the former Lord Phantomhive in a chair... his wife, a lovely thing, behind him. The little boy next to his knee was likely the young master himself, and.. and.....

There was a black dog in the picture.

A strange breed Mey Rin had never seen, and just looking at the old portrait of this dog long gone gave her chills.

The dog had likely suffered the same fate as the rest of the family...

...

Mey Rin recalled something, then.

Most family photos usually had a message on the back, usually describing the people in the photo!

One just had to be ... extra careful... and get the photo out of the frame!!!

The maid practically held her breath as she did this, as she wanted this one time to not screw up on something!!

Finally, she had it, and practically fumbled with keeping it AND the frame still in her clutches!!

So she put the frame back up on the mantle, and carefully turned the photo over...

And indeed, in some lovely faded cursive was a little bit of writing in the corner.

“Vincent, Rachel, Ciel and loyal Sebastian - 1880″

....

Mey Rin didn’t recall how she put the photograph back into the frame, but she must’ve at some point, for she finally really came back to herself what felt like an hour or so later. In her bedroom, and absolutely drenched in sweat...

The whole rest of the month, Mey Rin carried on with her job like normal, however she seemed to stay very quiet, especially around Mr. Sebastian for some reason.

It took much longer for the maid to get a good decent night of sleep, too.

#my writing #drabbles #Mey Rin #kuroshitsuji #bardroy #finny #sebastian michaelis #thank you for the requests!!! #deadly-safety-scissors

[fragmentedshards]

The Final Curtain, Chapter One

A Shocking Revelation and Several Changes

-

The room was full of people all looking at each other sorrowfully, adding to the nervous atmosphere hovering above them. Lau and Ran Mao stood by the window, exchanging confused glances. Elizabeth sat on the piano bench and sobbed on Paula's shoulder, prompting Agni and Prince Soma, who had been mourning nearby, to join in the attempt to comfort her. Tanaka, Bardroy, Mei Rin, and Finnian stood together nearest to the door, each with furrowed brows and dejected auras. At one point, Finnian squeezed his eyes shut, and tears began streaming down his face. Mei Rin pulled a handkerchief from her pocket and began to dry the boy's tears, while Tanaka rested his hands on the boy's shoulders in a fatherly fashion and Bard gently rubbed the boy's head. Even the Undertaker was there, standing alone next to a small end table, looking almost like a lost puppy. It was, perhaps, the most solemn wake anyone could imagine, though the wake of the deceased Earl Ciel Phantomhive had passed several days ago.

Sebastian took a turn about the room, speaking to each person briefly. His talk with the Undertaker took a little bit longer than the others. When he reached the other Phantomhive servants, he spoke to them in low, gentle tones, as he had done to the rest of the visitors. Finally, he gave Bard and Tanaka each light pats on their shoulders, raised Finnian's head, and cupped Mei Rin's face before striding to the center of the room, calling everyone to attention. He glanced at his pocket watch and sighed, putting it away as if it were irrelevant. This action on his part only served to further the queasy foreboding the others felt. Taking a deep breath, Sebastian said, "I don't suppose there's any use dawdling, nor do I believe there is any easy, clean way to go about this endeavor. I have brought you all here today because someone wishes to speak to you."

With that, the door near the servants opened, and in walked none other than Ciel Phantomhive.

The resulting buzz from the rest of the people in the room ranged from joy to panic. Even Lau and Ran Mao seemed caught off guard. Only the Undertaker kept his composure, merely raising and tilting his head in curiosity and near amusement. Ciel held up his hand to the small crowd, refusing to look at them. "Silence," he said, in just as irritated a tone as ever. "I have something to tell all of you.”

A fearful and anticipatory silence settled over the whole room. Although Ciel had clearly tried to keep his normal aloof attitude, he could not help it when that mask fell and was replaced by something that could almost be mistaken for guilt. Standing with his back to Sebastian and his face towards the rest, he began to speak.

"When I disappeared after the death of my parents and the destruction of my home, I was, in reality, captured by an underground cult. I still to this day do not have a clear picture of their purpose, although fairly recent interactions with the remains of this cult have given me a decent clue. During my time there, they branded me, tortured me, and nearly killed me. It wasn't until the moment before I would have died that I resorted to what is called the Faustian contract."

Ciel paused a moment, debating the diction of his next sentence, ignoring the horrified gasps from various people in the miniature crowd.

"Moments later, I found my enemies lying dead all around me, and myself restored and bound to a demon who would act as my butler until the day I avenged my parents. On that day, he would devour my soul."

Bard, Mei Rin, and Finnian all glanced at each other briefly, so many past experiences suddenly making sense. Mei Rin stared at Sebastian blankly. At length, Sebastian looked her way, prompting her to look emotionlessly at her shoes. Sebastian, in turn, did the same, holding his head lower than normal.

Ciel continued to speak to the small crowd. "Doubtless this is connecting many inexplicable events in your minds. At any rate, there's more. The fire that ravaged this city - the one that Pluto caused - that was the day I got my revenge. The exact details are too complicated for me to explain to you lot at this moment, but the long and short of it is, an angel of massacre had corrupted Queen Victoria and led her to attempt to cleanse the country. That resulted, in part, with the annihilation of the Phantomhives, or at least that was the intention." Ciel paused to shudder at the thought of what had really happened to his parents.

"However, after my family had been avenged, complications arose. Sebastian found himself unable to devour my soul, as an injury sustained during the avenging battle caused the temporary loss of our contract seal." At this, Ciel removed his eyepatch and Sebastian slid the glove off of his hand with his teeth, both of them revealing the contract seal. The others all gasped once more. "This allowed another demon, this one rather a miscreant, to tamper with my soul. Once again, I'll not labor through the details of this with you. The result of that struggle ended with my becoming a demon and Sebastian remaining my butler." Ciel allowed his eyes to glow red in order to demonstrate, garnering more gasps from the rest of the people in the room.

Ciel's eyes returned to their normal midnight blue, and he once again donned the eyepatch. Sebastian followed suit with his glove, white as ever. "As it seems Sebastian is bound to me forever, and I do not appear to be dying unless killed in a certain way, I have decided to continue running Funtom as a demon. Obviously my - species, I suppose - is not a fact that anyone else need know. And besides, why let a perfectly successful and expanding company go to ruin like that? I will also continue to operate as the Queen's Guard Dog; no sense in letting England's Underworld go without proper control either. For all intents and purposes, I am back and I am staying - except, I realize, for one particular circumstance which is beyond my control, and I must mend that.”

Ciel paused and took a deep breath.

"Soma. Lizzy. Please come forward.”

Elizabeth and Prince Soma both obliged, looking bewildered and a little dazed. They reached Ciel, who held out his hand to each. He held Soma's wrist, palm facing upwards, and placed Elizabeth's palm down on it gently, grasping them together. There was a moment of solemn silence before Elizabeth's eyes grew wide.

"Ciel, no!" she tried to remove her hand, but it would not budge.

“Lizzy-"

"I don't care if you're a demon, I don't care about all the things you and Sebastian have done!" Elizabeth exclaimed, her voice rife with desperation. "I love you, Ciel, please don’t-"

"Lizzy!" Ciel's voice, previously a weary one, now silenced the entire room once more. "This is the best, I promise you. You have to trust me. I know things you do not know." He turned to Soma, who was standing as still and as shocked as if he had been turned into stone, his golden eyes wide and his lip nearly trembling.

"Ciel..." Soma began, as if to make absolutely certain of the earl's decision. Ciel just slightly nodded his head, somber as ever.

"Take care of each other," he instructed them. "And rest assured that this is the right way of things. I promise." He gave their hands a firm yet affectionate squeeze before releasing them. "Now then," he said, closing his eyes and running his hand through his hair to fix it. "I have things to do. Life will resume as usual, more or less. You may now all go about your daily business. Oh, and you four -" the young earl looked at Bard, Mei Rin, Finnian, and Tanaka, who still seemed to be processing the entirety of what had just happened. "I believe Sebastian will want a word with you soon." And with that, the earl departed from the room, followed by a Sebastian with a slightly changed demeanor.

Author’s Note: hey everyone! I’m starting to post my stories on here finally, so that’s exciting... I’m sorry if the formatting is off, I’m currently mobile. As soon as I can figure out how to log back in on my laptop I’ll try to make better posts. Meanwhile, you’ll probably have a deluge of chapters on this story. Enjoy!

#fanfic #fanfiction #my writing #writer #writing #kuroshitsuji #black butler #black butler fanfiction #kuroshitsuji fanfiction #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #sebastian x meyrin #sebaciel #undertaker #undertaker x oc #soma x lizzy #soma x oc #ciel x lizzy #elizabeth midford #grell sutcliff #black butler grell #prince soma #agni #black butler agni #agni is not dead #meyrin #bardroy #finnian #finny #the final curtain

[chokememrstark]

In A World Of Alphas // Starker ABO!Verse

Words: 9,3k (Chapter 1 of 2)

Summary: The Avengers are strong, powerful Alphas, everyone knows and it's something they all joke about sometimes because it's just amusing. Tony jokes and laughs with them, knowing that they have no idea about the Omega in their midst that pretends to be just like them.

That is until Peter shows up, the friendly neighborhood spider, and Tony realizes that all his efforts and precautions turn out to be useless around the kid. Peter can smell the Omega he so desperately tries to hide and it only gets worse from the moments he understands this.

Warnings: abo!verse, alpha!peter, omega!tony, fake alpha!tony, mating cycles/in heat, angst, emotional hurt/comfort, hurt/comfort, fluff and smut, masturbation, lots of awkward moments

Notes: It’s an unusual idea with lots of emotion and twists, but I still hope you enjoy it. Part two will probably be a bit longer, but I really wanted to post the first part of this today already (It’s just so long I had to split it up, so watch out for more within the next days!) 

Tags: Because y’all have been so sweet and encouraging, I wanna tag you in this. Thank you for the wonderful motivation!!

@sthefystarkersworld @satans-substitute @starkerchemistryy @destinyrainevans @thequeenoffish @ketlingr @ciel-mio

[Read this fic on AO3]

There's something almost amusing about everyone seeing just another Alpha in Tony. Everyone on the team is an Alpha, even their newest recruitee Peter, aka Spider-Man. It's pretty much part of being an Avenger, they joke, and Tony laughs with them because it's the facade he needs to keep up at all costs. He's an Alpha, one of them, strong and independent and that's exactly how it should be. The only thing wrong with this is, that he's not.

Ever since he presented, Tony made sure to keep up the Alpha image. Artificial scent, perfume he uses almost hourly to mask his own scent with, adapting Alpha behavior and mannerisms, chasing after Omegas to the point he became a Playboy. No one knows and that's good because their respect would fly right out the window if they knew Tony is the exact opposite of what he pretends to be. He's been an Omega ever since he turned fifteen.

It's not easy for Tony, obviously, but he grew up with a certain view on the whole thing, especially regarding Omegas and he's not going to let that ruin what he built up over the years. And it all went perfectly, until Peter showed up. Because something about Peter is different and it's only two weeks before the first signs come through.

They're working in the lab together when Peter suddenly leans over really close. He stays like that for a moment before pulling back, frowning.

“You smell… different.”

Those three words already ring all the alarm bells in Tony's head but he brushes it off, saying he probably needs to shower and they both laugh about it. But the moment stays on Tony's mind.

A few days later, something similar happens. They are at a meeting and Peter suddenly begins to sniff. Then, he narrows his eyes and looks over at Tony, who immediately tries to hide his flushing cheeks and turns his head, engaging in a conversation with Clint.

It doesn't take long before Tony tries to stay away from Peter. Even if he bathed in the Alpha perfume he has, the kid will act as if he smells something that's not right and Tony knows exactly what. He smells the Omega he's trying so desperately to hide.

Given being an Omega is such a huge secret, Tony is very careful with heats. He has built a special room in the basement of the tower that's connected to his lab, a room where he can retreat for several days and that is stocked with everything he needs. It's locked as soon as he enters and Friday will only open the door when his heat is over or when there's a medical emergency - a security measure Tony deems necessary with so many Alphas around.

And normally it's not a problem. He knows when it will happen, he will make up a lie that he's going to an oversea conference or meeting and no one ever asks because he's Tony Stark, he does what he wants.

The first heat that comes up when Peter is there, however, doesn't start quite like that. It's two more days and Tony prepares for his absence, stocking his heat room with food and things to work on when he has the time, when suddenly Peter steps into the penthouse, just as Tony is looking through the kitchen for some sweet things to take with him - during his heats he's a sugar addict and he hates it.

“Mr. Stark? Are you looking for something?”

Tony tenses at the kid’s voice and stands up straight, forcing himself to smile when he turns around.

“Just trying to find a snack, but it looks like someone raided my kitchen,” he jokes and closes the cupboard door with his foot. “You need anything?”

“I got your message that you couldn't make it this week and wanted to ask if I could still work at the lab while you're gone?” Peter looks almost ashamed when he asks and Tony scolds himself internally. If Peter is in the lab he will be literally a door away while he goes through his heat and even though the room is sound and smell proof, he doesn't really trust those things when it comes to him.

“I don't think that's a good idea, kid,” he says and runs a hand through his hair, sighing. He can already see the disappointment on Peter's face and he hates it. “How about you just take a break yourself? You're working so hard, you deserve some time to have fun. Play games, meet your friends, stuff like that.”

“I won't break anything, I promise!” Peter is quick to assure him and fuck, Tony wants to let him stay but it's impossible. This can't go right, it just can't. “I'll be careful not to touch anything and I won't make a mess!”

“Peter, it's not about a mess, it's… just not a good idea, that's all.” How can he convince Peter to just drop it and stay away for a week, without shattering him? Working in the lab is the highlight of his day, Tony knows that. “It's just for a few days, I'll ring you up when I'm back, okay?”

Peter looks like he wants to protest again, but after a moment his shoulders drop and his head follows and he lets out a sigh. “Okay…” he says quietly, sad and defeated. Tony wants to punch himself, repeatedly. “I'll just… wait for your message then.”

Tony doesn't think, that's the only reason he can come up with later for walking over and pulling the kid into his arms. Peter stiffens immediately, just like he did himself before, and Tony tries hard not to worry about it.

“It's not because I don't trust you, Pete, alright?” he says as calm as possible, rubbing the boy's back. “I know you're careful and won't break anything, but you're overworking yourself and you really need a break from that.”

Peter doesn't reply right away, instead, he wraps his arms around Tony too and suddenly it feels like he's trapped. Tony's breath goes faster and then stops completely when he can hear - and feel - Peter smell him. This is bad, this is all kinds of bad. He tries to let go of Peter and to step back, but he's completely paralyzed.

“You… you are not…”

“Okay, stop!” Tony needs all his strength to speak and to not let his voice tremble and finally manages to push Peter away from him. The kid's eyes are wide and knowing and it's even worse than he expected it to be. “Whatever you want to say, don't. It's wrong. Just leave, I'll text you when you can come back.”

“But, sir… I… you...”

“NO!” Tony almost shouts now, balling his hands to fists. “If you say anything about this I will never speak another word with you, Peter, I mean it! And now go! Get the hell out of here!”

Peter's eyes widen even more at this and he gulps hard. But, thankfully, he doesn't say anything else before he turns and leaves the penthouse, just in time to not witness Tony sinking to his knees, muttering “Fuck” under his breath.

That's got to be the worst possible thing to happen. Why didn't he stop himself before coming so close to the kid and his nose? Why was his need to comfort Peter so strong he ignored all of his instincts?

“It's this fucking heat,” he eventually growls and pushes himself up. It has to be that, it just has to be. Anything else is just too far fetched. His heat is making him emotional and he always hated that. Tonight he will lock himself in his room and in a few days this whole thing will be done and when his brain starts to function properly again, he will find a way to fix this. Maybe he can even convince Peter that he got tricked by his senses. He is still young after all, such things happen.

In the evening, after making sure to get some more things into his heat room just in case, Tony gives the last instructions to Friday and locks himself up for the following days. He always dreads his heats, being forced into isolation is never fun and this time he has all this guilt over Peter to keep him company too. It won't be pretty, he knows it.

No one could say Tony's heat room is anything but luxurious - it has a TV, computers, a two-way security system connected to his lab, a fridge and even a small cooking isle and a big comfy bed - but it's still nothing more but a cell to keep him locked away from any possible Alpha around him. He even installed a shower in the small bathroom attached to it, just for his own personal comfort after a heatwave. It's a necessary evil, so to speak, one that frequently steals five to six days of Tony's life he can't get back, but what can he do?

The first night and following day are boring because his heat didn't start yet, but it's better to go a day earlier than one too late - a close encounter with Steve after his heat started some hours early a while ago taught Tony this detail the hard way. He spends his time mostly with fixing protocols on his laptop and having a few drinks in the evening to fall asleep easier - one time Pepper calls him about a contract he forgot to sign before leaving and he promises her to get it done as soon as he's back, but that’s as much human interaction as he gets.

His first heatwave hits him hard around nine the next day, reminding him just how much he hates being an Omega. If he actually were an Alpha, he wouldn’t have to writhe and roll around on his bed like a filthy whore, fucking himself on fake knots just to get rid of this embarrassingly strong need for it. He almost forgets about Peter during the whole ordeal and while Friday gets rid of the disgusting odor in his room - Tony absolutely hates the scent of his heat because it just smells of desperation and shame - he takes a long, relieving shower, preparing himself for the hours of relative calm that are about to follow.

Generally, after every wave of his heat, Tony has a few hours to relax, to sleep, to even work when he feels like it. This should be something to look forward to, but at the moment he’s far too frustrated to even think about work. He stares at his screen for the second hour in a row when Friday suddenly gives him a silent alarm on a second monitor. There are only two reasons for this kind of alarm: either the tower is under attack or someone is in his lab, and for some reason, Tony doesn’t think it’s an attack.

“Pull the lab livestreams up, Friday,” he says and narrows his eyes. There are three small windows opening, showing every corner of his lab and Tony notices that this intruder is there for longer than the minute that has passed since Friday’s alarm.

He stares at the screen, at the second camera stream to be exact. It shows a corner of the lab and there sits Peter, with his arms wrapped around his knees and his face hidden from the camera. DUM-E is next to him, awkwardly patting the boy’s back and then Tony hears it, a heart wrenching, muffled sob.

“Friday, why didn’t you notify me right away about this security breach?”

“Considering it’s Peter, I did not classify him as a threat, sir,” Friday excuses herself. “He seems to be in a lot of distress though, I thought you might want to know.”

“Fuck.” Tony slams a fist onto the table. What is Peter doing here? And why is he sitting in the fucking corner of the lab like a beaten dog? “Friday, turn up the audio and zoom in, I want to hear what’s going on there.”

The picture gets bigger and Tony hears a beeping noise coming from DUM-E, to which Peter shakes his head as if he actually understands him. Tony frowns, this is weird. But then, the boy sobs again and covers his head with his hands.

“I… I didn’t mean to make him mad, I swear,” Peter sobs and Tony feels his chest tighten with guilt. No, this isn’t happening… Peter isn’t sitting there crying because he yelled at him two days ago, is he? “I didn’t know, I swear, DUM-E, I didn’t know…”

DUM-E beeps again and pats Peter’s head, but the kid only cries harder at this attempt to comfort him.

“What if he hates me now? He was so angry at me, what if he really won’t talk to me anymore? And he will be so mad when he finds out I’m here but… I miss him so much when he’s not there… I thought I could do it, but I can't…”

“Friday, what’s wrong with Peter?” Tony asks, unable to believe this is really just because he was mad over the boy finding out the truth. It seems like such an overreaction, it makes no sense. “Did he get hurt? Is he sick?”

“I’m afraid not, sir,” Friday says as Tony watches DUM-E hand Peter a tissue that he drops into his lap. “I cannot find any injuries or illnesses, it seems that his outburst is purely emotional.”

“Perfect…” Tony groans and drops his forehead onto the table. What is he supposed to do now? At the moment the smell of his heat isn’t that strong, but once his next wave hits… he just knows that Peter will notice it, whether or not his room is smell proof. “He needs to leave.”

It’s kind of impossible to look away from the screen, now that Tony knows Peter is in the lab. He doesn’t like seeing the kid cry, especially not because of something he did. It’s not Peter’s fault that he can smell through his bluff, is it? No, the kid never asked for his senses to be improved to the point they become a problem and Tony likes him, he really does. But this isn’t good. He knows that he will lose it when an Alpha is this close, he just knows. It happened once already in the past and it almost ended with Tony being mated to a random stranger because he didn’t pay attention to his cycle yet. Since then he learned to stay away from Alphas, knowing full well that he had no fucking control over himself.

Suddenly, something on the screen changes. Peter stands up and uses the tissue DUM-E gave him to wipe his nose. He repeats that a few times and Tony starts to worry.

“Friday, how smell proof is this room when you take Peter’s improved senses into consideration?” He can’t believe he didn’t check this earlier, but the number Friday are running in front of him don’t look good.

“There is a rather high chance that he will be able to smell something once your next heatwave hits, sir,” Friday tells him - not that he expected anything less, of course, that’s just Tony’s luck. “If he stays where he is, there’s a 60% chance that he will notice. But if he comes any closer to the door…”

“Friday, tell me,” Tony says strict when his AI pauses. “How high is the chance?”

“100%, sir. Peter’s senses will pick up on it, I cannot prevent it, not even if I seal the whole room and air ventilation.”

“Shit!” Tony hisses and get off the table. This is bad, this is all kinds of bad! “The bathroom! What if I go there?”

“Sir, I don’t think it’s a good idea to go there during your heatwave. It’s too dangerous.”

“Friday, if he knows I’m here I will try to get out!” Tony groans and fists his hair angrily. “Fuck, I might even try it when he doesn’t know! He needs to leave, I cannot let him see me like this!”

“Even if you try to get out, sir, my protocols forbid me to open the door under any circumstances until your heat is over or you have a serious medical emergency. And Peter will not be able to get in, it’s impossible.”

Tony groans. Yes, he knows all of this and that’s what makes it so damn difficult. He can’t get out and drag Peter away and he can’t let him in - which would be even worse because Tony would jump the kid’s bones like there’s no tomorrow, probably traumatizing him for the rest of his life. And it won’t take long before his next wave is coming, the four to five hour timeframe is already half over.

When he glances back over at the screen, Tony notices that Peter is still there, staring at the project they have been working on for the last couple of days. The one Peter claimed he wanted to finish so desperately he even asked to come to the lab while Tony is gone. He doesn’t look as though he is going to work on it, however. The kid just looks sad and defeated. Tony hears another beeping from DUM-E and then Peter turns around, patting the robot’s head. For some reason, this actually makes Tony smile. He has never seen anyone who treated DUM-E or any other of his robots and AIs like Peter does, but he shouldn’t be surprised, after all, the kid named Karen too.

“I wish I could apologize,” Peter says quietly, sitting down on the bench next to him. “I’m sure there’s a reason he doesn’t want anyone to know and I just acted so dumb and rude… no wonder he’s mad at me.”

DUM-E beeps a few times and strokes Peter’s hand, to which the boy smiles weakly.

“You think he will be angry that I came here?” Peter asks with a sigh. “He was so determined to keep me away from the lab and I didn’t listen…”

Yes, feel guilty! Leave! Don’t think about coming back and do it fast! Come on, Pete, be a good kid and fucking listen for once.

Tony almost thinks Peter will actually leave, but of course he doesn't. He covers his face with his hands and sobs again and Tony just wants to storm out of the room to hug him and then get him as far away from the lab as possible. And then, he gets an idea. It’s dangerous, it will reveal that he’s there without his heat doing it for him, but if he can get Peter out of there it’s worth it. He can explain later, when all of this is over.

He takes a deep breath and goes through the heat room protocols until he finds the one for outside communication, the one that is directly connected to the lab. He runs it and waits for the small ‘connected’ to appear on the screen. Then, he speaks.

“Peter?” Tony’s voice is gentle and calm, but it still makes the boy jump and look around almost in panic. He can see the fear on his face and it hurts.

“S-Sir!? I-I’m sorry!I didn’t… I just came because…”

“Shh, it’s okay, Peter. I’m not mad, I promise,” Tony says quietly, pinching his nose. Calm, he needs to stay calm. “But I need you to leave the lab, now.”

“I…” Peter stops suddenly, even in his sobs, and looks at the ceiling. “Can you… see me?”

“Yes and you shouldn’t be there, kid,” Tony sighs. God, why is it so hard to just talk to him?

“I promise I won’t break anything, sir, I-”

“Peter, stop!” Tony says strictly. “I told you it’s not about that. It’s… dangerous when you’re in the lab right now.”

Peter sniffs and shakes his head before wiping his eyes. He looks so crushed it makes Tony’s heart ache and he curses himself for not just locking the damn lab. Then again, he granted Peter access a while ago and even Friday wouldn’t have kept him out in this case. He’s going crazy, he just knows it. Why can’t the kid just leave?

“Pete, look, I-” Tony’s voice is cut off harshly when a stinging pain clutches around his insides and he throws himself forward with a low, desperate and painful groan. Fuck, no! This… this can’t be! Not yet! He still has an hour at least!

“Sir?” Peter’s worry is back, Tony can hear it in his voice without even seeing him and he pushes his chair back to get to the floor, almost curling himself up into a ball. “Sir, are you okay? What happened? Are you hurt?”

“Peter, please just - Argh! Just… leave…” Tony can barely speak when it begins to feel like someone is trying to pull his insides out. It always starts painful, but it was never this bad, never this… intense and agonizing. And then he realizes without any surprise that this is his body’s way of reacting to an available Alpha just on the other side of the door.

“Sir, if I can do anything to help, I-” Peter’s voice trails off and Tony knows exactly why. It’s too late to hide it anymore. His hormones are through the roof, his heatwave is hitting him harder than ever before and Peter is too close, he’s just too fucking close.

Tony lets out an agonizing wail and clutches his stomach, rolling over to the side in a desperate attempt to not look at the monitors, but it’s completely useless. His eyes find them anyway and what he sees is just Peter standing there, with wide eyes and blown pupils, his mouth partially open and staring at the camera directly pointed at him on the ceiling.

“You’re in he-”

“SHUT UP AND GET OUT OF HERE!” Tony shouts, but his heart isn’t in it. He wants Peter to stay, fuck, he wants Peter to break down this damn door and knot him and make him scream and beg for more. God, he hates himself for being so weak, for not being able to control those damn instincts.

Tony knows that Peter won’t go anywhere now that he has smelled his heat - even older, more experienced Alphas wouldn’t be able to do that and Peter is still so young, he probably never had this happen to him before. It’s all so messed up, but Tony can’t stop it.

“Pete, just go! It only gets worse when I know you’re here, please just leave!”

And then he realizes his mistake, but it’s too late, the words are already out and Peter heard them, there’s no way he doesn’t know what this means.

“You… you want me to...?” Peter’s voice is surprised and fuck if it’s not aroused, which is far worse for Tony. He lets out another desperate groan and pushes himself off the floor, his legs so shaky he barely makes it to the bed before they give in.

“Fuck, Friday, open the door!” He cries out, palming his cock and trying to not acknowledge the wetness between his legs. His body is going wild just because Peter is there, screaming to be fucked and knotted and bred like he never experienced it before. It’s so horrible and humiliating, it drives tears into his eyes.

“I cannot do that, sir,” Friday says, sounding almost sorry. “My protocols won’t allow me to do that.”

“I’m your boss, I made you!” Tony growls furiously, glaring at the ceiling. “Open the fucking door!”

“I’m sorry, sir, I cannot do that.”

Tony wants to smash Friday into pieces for denying him access to the Alpha that is right there. Doesn’t she know how much he needs him? Doesn’t she know how painful it is to know Peter is right there and that he cannot get to him? He’s still growling and writhing on the bed, trying desperately to find a way to get out or to get Peter in, when he suddenly hears the Alpha’s voice again.

“Sir, you have to stop!” Peter sounds like he’s crying again and when Tony manages to glance over at the monitors, he sees the tears in the kid’s eyes and the sadness on his face. “Please, it’s okay…”

Tony knows it’s not okay, it can’t be as long as Peter is out there, so close and yet unreachable for him. He cries out desperately, burying his face in the pillow and only partially managing to muffle the desperation in his voice. “Friday, open… please open the door…”

“Sir, I… I can’t,” Friday sounds as if she wants to do it, but her protocols prevent her from following Tony’s order. It’s so frustrating.

“I will leave, okay?” Peter sobs suddenly and Tony’s attention is fully back on the monitors. The kid looks so devastated and heartbroken, it hurts to see. “Please, I’ll just go if it makes everything worse when I’m here!”

“NO!” Tony cries out without even knowing why - he wants Peter to leave, why won’t his brain deliver the words? “If you won’t open the door, Friday, I will make you open them!”

“Sir, what?” Peter asks, but Tony is already ripping his shirt off, asking himself why he even bothered to dress again after his shower.

“You have to open the doors for a medical emergency, I will give you one,” Tony growls as he grips the arc reactor in his chest harshly.

“Sir, NO!” Peter cries, but Tony barely hears him. He is too focused on this, his need is too strong. Friday has to open the doors if he has a heart attack, she just has to! And Peter can put the reactor back in if he’s fast enough, it can work, it just has to!

“I’ll make you open it, Friday,” Tony mumbles and then finally turns the reactor, letting out a deep groan at the immediate pain he feels in his chest. He can do it, it’s not the first time… he can do it without causing any harm… he can..

“OMEGA, STOP!”

Suddenly, Tony freezes completely. That voice… it’s an Alpha voice, loud and clear and so fucking close. During all those years, Tony never heard it in one of his heats and while he is able to ignore any Alpha voice on a day-to-day basis, right now his mind and body react on their own and he listens to it without any questioning.

“Sir… please don’t,” Peter continues, his voice now far less commanding and harsh, but Tony’s body was unable to process the change for the time being and stayed still. “I’ll stay here, okay? I… I can’t come in, but I’ll stay here if you want me to… just please don’t hurt yourself, please…”

After a long pause, Tony finally manages to swallow and, after screwing his reactor back in place - not without another unpleasant sting - he drops his hand. His breath goes horribly fast and he can’t ignore the pulling on his insides, but… Peter wants to stay. Does he mean it? How can Tony let him stay when he’s in this disgusting and horrible state? Somewhere between Peter’s Alpha voice and his almost shy words right after, Tony’s heat decided to spare him for a moment, giving him time to breathe.

“You shouldn’t be here,” Tony says, his breath still hitching and making his voice tremble.

“I… I don’t want to leave you alone,” Peter replies, still crying and embarrassed, but Tony can hear the suppressed need in his voice.

Tony can feel his own rise inside of him again already and he hates it, he hates it so much because Peter is listening and he can’t even get up to turn off the communication. He can’t have him witness this, it’s just too humiliating…

“Peter… you know what I am,” Tony finally says with a thick voice, pressing his legs together desperately. “You know what you are… if you stay, I… it won’t be pretty.”

“It’s okay, I… I still want to stay.” Peter sounds so sure, so absolutely committed to stay with Tony and it makes the Omega’s heart ache. How can Peter just accept this huge secret he’s trying to hide from everyone without judging him? How can he not just run - and probably tell everybody he meets because that’s essentially what Tony has been fearing all along?

Tony is torn. For the first time in his life, he doesn’t know what is the right thing to do and it frustrates him so much. He wants Peter to stay, but at the same time he doesn’t want him to hear the pitiful and desperate act that he is about to commit and won’t be able to stop.

“Will you… stay if I turn the communication off for some time?” he finally asks, his stomach tightening at the idea of shutting Peter out from his heat. But he has to, he knows it’s the only way he can keep at least some form of his dignity.

“I… I’ll be here,” Peter says after a moment, very quiet and very sad. “If you… need time for yourself… I will still stay. It’s okay, I promise.”

The relief Tony feels shouldn’t be so intense, but it is and he can’t do anything about it.

“I will be back in a bit, I just… need to get this over with,” he gulps and finally forces himself off the bed. It feels like he’s climbing a mountain when he makes his way to the desk and when he holds onto the surface, he looks at Peter’s sweet and innocent and oh so worried face on the monitor one last time before saying: “Thank you, Peter…” Then, he turns off the communication and lets out a deep sigh. This is it now… this is the ultimate test.

He knows what I’m going to do and he will leave, he just has to. He will smell my heat and he won’t be able to take it because he’s not used to it… when I turn the communication back on he will be gone and he probably won’t come back anymore.

But despite his fear, Tony’s instincts are too strong to ignore them for much longer. Only that this time, when he throws himself onto his bed and grabs one of the toys that have eased his urges through countless of heats, his mind isn’t set to the ultimate goal of relief. No, this time, Peter is on his mind and Tony can barely cope with how much he wants the kid to be there with him, to give him what everything in his body and mind crave for so badly, no matter how wrong it is.

It’s an hour before Tony finally manages to find the release his body has been aching for so much and when he drags himself towards the shower, he just feels like falling asleep from exhaustion. Three or four waves a day are nothing uncommon during his heat, but usually he can just sleep whenever he wants to. Now, however, Peter is out there - at least he hopes he still is - and he promised to come back… he can’t just fall asleep for several hours, he can’t.

Tony’s heart is heavy when he sits back down on his desk finally. What if Peter left and he’s just going to look at an empty lab? He knows he should expect it, but the thought still hurts him deep inside. When he finally reaches out for his keyboard and runs the communication protocols again - including the camera feed - his heart is almost jumping out of his chest.

It takes an awfully long minute before the screen flickers and Tony can see the camera feed again and his heart makes a small jump when he spots Peter. He’s still there, he didn’t leave! He sits on one of the chairs, DUM-E next to him and a holo screen above his lap, apparently reading or looking at something. Tony can’t do anything other than watch the kid for a moment, wondering why he ever doubted him in the first place.

Peter is concentrating on what he reads, something that Tony could pull up on his screen but doesn’t because it just isn’t relevant to his interest at the moment, and when the Omega’s voice comes over the speakers again, Peter only flinches slightly because of the surprise. He immediately looks up though, a bright smile on his lips.

“Sir? Are you okay?” Peter asks worried and Tony really just wants to hug and kiss him for his wonderful sweetness.

“I’m okay, yes,” he says, chuckling. “What are you doing over there?”

At that, Peter flushes and quickly lets the holo display disappear before smiling at the camera. “Just some research, nothing important,” he replies.

Tony smirks, he can’t help it. He could easily ask Friday what Peter looked at and the kid knows that too, but he doesn’t. Right now he’s in this rather calm mindset between his heats and this time, he’s not completely alone. Peter is there, someone he likes and he can talk to, and he doesn’t want to argue.

“Talk to me, kid,” he says instead, sprawling in his chair and trying to somehow relax after all of this. Having someone else there during his heats is… unfamiliar. But it doesn’t feel all bad for some reason. Maybe it’s because it’s Peter or maybe it’s because he’s so utterly relieved that Peter isn’t running away from him.

And talking is pretty much what they do over the hours that follow, as weird as it might seem.

There is something so relieving about Peter knowing and not judging him that helps Tony let go of at least a little bit of his fear regarding company during this time. And it’s not unpleasant at all. Tony feared they might just be talking about his heat, but that isn’t even a topic to begin with. Peter starts talking about school and Tony jumps in, relieved  that it’s not about him right away.

Tony never experienced a heat like this. When his third wave of the day is about to hit, he lets Peter know soon enough to cut the communication off until it’s over, only later finding out Peter used the time to get himself something to eat and drink and a little to not be too overwhelmed by the scent of it. Tony is unreasonably touched when Peter tells him and doesn’t even know what to say to it.

Whenever his heatwaves aren’t torturing Tony, Peter is there, sitting with his back against the door - Tony assumes Friday told him where exactly it is but he can’t rule out that Peter found it on his own. And they talk, they talk so much, about basically everything. About school, about projects, sometimes about more personal things. When the topic draws towards Tony being an Omega, Tony is hesitant at first, but it comes easy telling Peter about it. Maybe because of the physical distance forced onto them, he doesn’t know, but it turns out to be rather relieving eventually.

When it becomes late, Tony asks Peter if he’d rather leave to actually go sleep in a bed, but the kid refuses. “I promised I’ll stay with you and I will,” he says and gets up to collect the blankets and pillows from the lounge area of the lab. There are not many, but they are enough so Peter can cuddle into one of the blankets and lean against the door. “Do you mind if I sleep here?”

Tony’s heart feels so full at the question and he’s glad Peter can’t see the smile on his face. “Of course not,” he says softly. “Are you comfortable like this?”

Peter nods, smiling at the camera. “As comfortable as I can be,” he says and lays down, wrapping the blanket around him. Tony is tired himself, but he doesn’t lay down before he knows Peter is asleep. Only then he crawls into bed, closing his eyes and allowing himself some rest too.

It’s three days they spend this way, mostly talking and even joking, unless one of Tony’s heatwaves hits him and he cuts the connection off. Until the last day, when he sits in front of the door himself, completely forgetting what’s about to happen soon. When he’s hit with the oh so familiar cramps that introduces another cycle, it hits him by surprise and he rolls over once more, clutching his stomach and groaning in pain. By now, Peter knows what’s going on and he jumps into action immediately.

“Omega, it’s alright,” the boy says quietly, his voice so close even though Tony can only hear it through the speakers that it already has a slightly calming effect on him. “You’re not alone, okay? I’m here, I’m with you…”

Tony lets out a desperate growl and throws himself against the door, knowing full well that there are only inches separating him from Peter and still being unable to reach him. For the first time, he doesn’t think about turning the communication off, without even knowing why.

“I wish you’d be here, Pete,” he sighs, one hand still pressing against his stomach and pressing his fingers harshly against his skin. “You must think so low of me by now, but I… I’m glad you’re with me…”

“I would never think bad of you, Tony,” Peter assures him, the use of his first name making the Omega smirk weakly. It’s the first time the kid does it, before this moment he was unable to shake off the ‘sir’ or ‘Mr. Stark’ - not that Tony minds, but his first name has something more… personal somehow. “You can talk to me if you need to, I’m here…”

“Pete…” Tony swallows and turns to his side, taking a deep breath to somehow keep the pain under control. It would be better to turn the communication off, he knows that. Anything else will just make it worse. But he wants to hear Peter, he wants to know he’s there, even if what’s going to happen is embarrassing.

“I won’t go anywhere, I promised,” Peter says and Tony can see him press one of his hands against the door that separates them. With a tear escaping his eyes, Tony presses his hand against the same spot, leaning his head against the metal. He knows Peter can’t feel it, but the illusion that they are almost touching is… soothing somehow.

And Peter keeps his promise, through all of it. When Tony is begging, the boy is there, talking him through it, promising that it will be over soon and that he will stay with him, when Tony is easing his need with the toys he built, Peter is there and doesn't judge, instead actually begins talking to him and indulging in Tony's heat induced fantasy of having him.

Even when Tony can't prevent the sobs afterwards, pressing a hand against his eyes and cursing his entire existence, Peter doesn't go anywhere and he doesn't laugh, he doesn't tell him that he's as worthless as he feels. Instead, he tells him that he's strong and amazing, that he doesn't see him as any less, that he's right just the way he is and it's the first time anyone ever says such things to Tony, which makes him even more emotional even though he absolutely hates it.

When it's over, they don't talk about it again. Tony is so clearly uncomfortable about the whole thing and Peter doesn't push him, doesn't ask questions. He simply returns to the conversation they had before it started, as if nothing had interrupted them. Tony doesn't know how he can ever thank Peter for this and during the conversation that follows, in which he sits with his back against the door again, he has several moments where he has to force himself to not cry.

Tony doesn't know what happened, why he can barely contain his emotions anymore. He didn't think Peter would be so accepting and sweet, that he would actually stay and not just run. And now, after three days of spending so close together, without even actually seeing each other, everything feels so confusing and overwhelming. It's just… so much.

That evening, after Peter had curled up against the door once more, Tony couldn't find any sleep. His heat will be over in a few hours and he doesn't know what he's supposed to do then. As long as they are separated like this, it all feels surreal, a bit like a dream. But, once the doors will open, everything is going to be real, everything that happened they will have to face somehow and he doesn't know how he will do it. Or if he even can...

“Sir, Peter has fallen asleep,” Friday informs him and Tony nods, but unlike the nights before, he doesn't stand up to get to bed.

“Friday… Peter is the first one in 25 years to find out I am not an Alpha…” Tony says quietly after a while, without looking up. “I have no idea what to say when we see each other again face to face…”

“May I suggest not saying anything, sir?” Friday says calmly, as if to not upset Tony. “Peter doesn't seem to mind that you are an Omega, he has gone through a lot to spend the last few days with you. Someone you would not be important to would not have done that.”

“He cares about me, I know, but how can he still see me the way he did before after knowing this? How can he still look up to me?”

“I suggest just being yourself, sir, like you always were with him. This doesn't have to stand between you, not if you won't let it.”

Friday is right, Tony thinks and sighs, leaning his head against the door. Maybe he's overthinking all of this. Maybe Peter truly doesn't think lower of him for being an Omega. That doesn't mean he won't do it because Tony has lied to everyone his whole life, but perhaps he will understand. God, Tony hopes he will understand…

Tony doesn't notice that he eventually falls asleep like this, his mind still circling around Peter and this whole mess. He's woken up when the door suddenly unlocks - it's a sound he usually anticipates and that now sends a cold shiver down his spine. Tony immediately gets up, ignoring that every muscle in his body feels sore and tense, and looks at the monitors. Peter is still asleep in front of the door, the noise didn't wake him up.

Normally, Tony would storm out of the room to dive back into his freedom, but now he carefully opens it instead to not wake Peter and when he sees the kid sleeping peacefully, he can't suppress the smile that creeps onto his lips. He's so innocent and sweet, he can barely believe this kid is an Alpha.

But he is, his mind insists, as if to tease him. He is and you just spent your heat with him, even if it wasn't physically.

Tony swallows and shakes his head. He knows that, but that doesn't change that Peter needs a comfortable bed, not the lab floor for the fourth night in a row. He already feels bad enough for the first three, really.

As careful as possible, Tony kneels down and shoves his hands under the boy to pick him up, without waking him. The blanket is still wrapped tight around him and when Tony manages to stand again, he realizes how small Peter actually looks in his arms, all curled up like this. He leans down and presses a soft kiss onto his forehead before making his way out of the lab, towards the elevator. Maybe it's not his best idea, but Peter deserves a good night's rest after all he went through and Tony knows his own bed will help with that.

On their way up to the penthouse, Peter suddenly begins to shift in his arms and eventually looks up at Tony. He's barely awake, but he registers where he is and smiles when he sees Tony carrying him.

“Omega…” he whispers before snuggling against his chest again and Tony has the strong urge to never let him go again.

Tony carries Peter all the way to his bedroom, where he puts him down gently and covers him with his own blanket to keep him warm. Then, against his better judgement, he crawls into the bed behind Peter and wraps his arms around him, only using his own blanket to cover himself and leaving Peter's as a thin layer of safety between them. He knows sometimes after his heat he is still very needy, so he wants to be sure to not do anything dumb or inappropriate with the kid in this state.

-----

It's only a few hours of sleep they get this way, but throughout the rest of the night, Peter doesn't move away from Tony at all. He's still cuddled against him in the morning with Tony's arms around him, holding him tight. It's Tony who wakes up first and it's him who breaks the embrace carefully, knowing that whatever happened during his heat needs to be treated as that, unless Peter decides otherwise. Dumb decisions are made during heats and ruts, that's the most common knowledge and Tony won't make those mistakes. He already made too many.

Tony wraps the blanket tight around Peter again before leaving, fighting his internal need for comfort and warmth that always comes after a heat. It's nothing he wouldn't be used to dealing with alone and he can't drag Peter even deeper into this than he already has. So, to distract himself, he decides to make breakfast. During the last days he mostly lived off of frozen meals for one and snacks, he needs something real again.

Half an hour later the smell of freshly brewed coffee fills the kitchen and there are omelettes and waffles on the table, as well as fresh strawberries that had been delivered the day before. When Peter stumbles out of the bedroom, rubbing his eyes sleepily and yawning, he finds Tony still in the kitchen.

“Is that… bacon?” Peter asks hopefully and Tony can't help but laugh at the unusual way of greeting him.

“Bacon and eggs and coffee, we have some waffles too if you want them.”

Peter still looks at Tony with wide eyes when he sits down and watches him come over too, a plate of bacon in his hands.

“I… I didn't know you could… cook,” Peter says embarrassed, causing Tony to laugh again.

“I usually don't brag with it, it's not really something people expect from an Alpha,” he says with a shrug and gets himself some of the omelette and bacon. “But I get along. Try the eggs before they're cold if you want to, they're what usually turns out best.”

Peter nods and puts some of the omelette onto his plate too and after debating for a moment adds a few strips of bacon on top of them. Then, he reaches for the strawberries, which makes Tony smile for some reason.

“What's so funny?” he asks curiously.

“Nothing,” Tony chuckles and takes a sip from his coffee. “I just always have the urge for these things after a heat, I don't know why.”

Peter bites the tip off his strawberry, wiping his chin when some of the juice runs down his lips. “They're good,” he says, smiling, and only now noticing the way Tony is looking at him. As if he was caught red handed, Tony shakes his head quickly, taking a bite of his eggs. His cheeks are slightly pink and Peter feels a sudden pit in his stomach.

“I won't tell anyone, you know,” Peter says quietly after a while, without looking up. He knows that this is a topic Tony doesn't want to talk about but it feels necessary that they address it. “I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble and for making you angry…”

Tony swallows his bacon down and looks at Peter, who appears so much smaller than he actually is with his bowed head and hanging shoulders. He feels awful for the guilt he caused in the boy with his own fear.

“I wasn't angry at you, Pete,” Tony finally sighs, putting his fork down. His hunger disappeared somehow. “You just happened to sniff through a bluff that lasted 25 years and I… kind of panicked.”

Peter gulps and his cheeks flush harder. “I… I didn't mean to, really. I should have just stayed quiet.”

“It's not your fault, don't work yourself up over it,” Tony sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Sooner or later someone had to find out, I'm just glad it was you and not Steve or Bruce. I'd never hear the end of it.”

Peter isn't sure what to say to that and shifts uncomfortably in his chair. “I… I won't tell anyone,” he repeats eventually, just to make sure Tony knows he won't. “I don't mind, really, you're still… you, after all.”

“I wish everyone would think like that,” Tony smiles and takes one of Peter's hands over the table, squeezing it gently. “I'm sorry I yelled at you, that was really not the right way to go about it.”

“Are you… mad that I didn't listen to you? That I came into the lab after you told me not to?”

Tony shakes his head, still smiling. “I know you didn't do it to spite me and you didn't know why I told you to stay away, it's okay, really.”

There's a long silence between them in which neither of them does anything, not even eat, and Tony knows this isn't over yet. There are other things Peter wants to ask, things he doesn't want to talk about but knows he has to.

“Were you really about to hurt yourself just so Friday would open the door?”

Damn, Peter asks one of the worst questions right away, he doesn't dance around the bush.

“You could say I was a bit… overwhelmed by your presence,” Tony admits with a smirk. “I stay away from Alphas during my heat, it's just too dangerous if I don't. Had you not stopped me… you would have either found me dying of a heart attack or making you take and knot me. It's not pretty and I wish you wouldn't have witnessed any of this, believe me.”

Tony looks ashamed and he feels the part too. He remembers how he had begged Friday to open the doors, how he was willing to risk his own life just for Peter's knot. It's just embarrassing how little control he had left during his heat. And Peter experienced everything, which makes it about ten times worse.

“What… what were you trying to do?” Peter asks carefully, as if he's afraid of the answer. Tony sighs and pushes his shirt up, taking his arc reactor into his hand and twisting it. “Oh God no, stop!” Peter protests immediately, jumping up with fear wide eyes.

“Don't worry, nothing can happen yet,” Tony says calmly and gives the kid a patient smile. “This is how far I got. You stopped me from pulling the plug, basically.” He lets out a half amused, half bitter laugh and screws the reactor back in before pulling his shirt down again. “It's kind of deadly to remove the reactor for too long.”

“Don't… don't do that again, please,” Peter gulps, his hands shaking when he sits back down. “Did you... really want it that much?”

Tony nods, anything but proud of it. “Heats are no child's play, kid,” Tony says with a hint of bitterness in his voice and looks at him. “They make people dumb and reckless, just like ruts. Omegas have thrown themselves off buildings or in front of cars during their heats, it's literally shutting parts of their brains off at times.”

“Is that why you lock yourself away?”

“Partially. I also do it because I live in a tower full of Alphas and it's not a good idea to go into heat around them.” Tony gives Peter a smirk before continuing. “It can turn Alphas into beasts when they're faced with it directly. Tends to give them all kinds of filthy ideas.”

Peter blushes hard and turns his head in an attempt to hide it, but of course Tony saw it already. “It must be… difficult to not let anyone know…” he mumbles.

“I’ve been doing it for quite some time now, I just didn't expect someone to just show up and literally smell through it like you did,” Tony shrugs. Of course it's not fun pretending to be an Alpha, but it's easier than the other option he has.

“I'm sorry you have to do this…” Peter's voice is quiet and something about it makes Tony's chest ache. He has been around countless of Alphas, but none of them were ever like this kid. Something about Peter is different and Tony can't ignore that he likes that. A lot more than he should.

“You know, if all Alphas were a bit more like you, I wouldn't have to hide what I am,” Tony says softly and smiles, shaking his head. “But as it is, it's just easier this way.”

Peter nods, but doesn't say anything to that. He looks uncomfortable, as if he'd rather be elsewhere and Tony doesn't know if he wants the kid leave or stay. Peter is nice company, they got to know each other much better over the last days, but he can't let this progress even if he clearly wants to.

“I'm glad you stayed with me over the last days, Peter,” Tony finally says and he actually means it. “I'm sorry for… pulling you into this, but I enjoyed your company a lot.”

“I enjoyed yours too,” Peter mumbles and turns back to the table. He takes his coffee, which is now cold, and drinks it with a stern face. When he puts the mug back down Tony notices the tremble of his fingers against the porcelain. “And thank you for getting me into a real bed…”

Tony wants to hug Peter so much and preferably never stop. He reaches out with his foot under the table, rubbing his ankle against Peter's leg carefully. The boy flinches for a moment, but then relaxes again and actually presses his leg against the touch.

“If you… want me to keep you company again, I… I don't mind, really,” Peter says after a while, looking at his plate of cold food. “I don't know, maybe we can… work together when it's not that bad. To distract you.”

Tony should say no and that Peter is crazy for even suggesting this, but he doesn't. He wonders if he could risk it, if he can trust himself and Peter enough to actually be around him during his heat. He could still retreat to his heat room when a wave hits him, he just needs to change some of Friday's protocols so he can open the door at will. It's dangerous, it's reckless and dumb, all the things Tony tries so hard not to be during his heat, but when he looks at Peter, he feels like it's worth trying.

“It's okay if you don't want to, I understand,” Peter says when Tony doesn't answer for a while and shakes his head. “It's probably not a good idea, to be around me, I mean.”

“I've never been with an Alpha during my heats, Peter, this… this isn't an easy decision for me,” Tony admits, taking one of Peter's hands again to squeeze it. “Give me some time to think about it, okay?”

Peter gives him a thankful and weak smile and nods, squeezing his hand back.

#starker #tony/peter #peter/tony #ironspider #abo!verse #omega!tony #alpha!peter #myfics #i'm so excited to post this you have NO idea #ugh #nff

[neophix]

Elsword PvP Stereotypes: 2nd Edition

Alright. It’s been a year and a half. Let’s do this again, sure.

Unlike last time, where people salting at me during the match contributed to a large portion of the character stereotype, I only have their gameplay to work off of this season. Mostly. Rage whispers have gone down significantly which honestly is a change that's good for everyone. {Nod nod.}

{Additional commentary by @demos-cloud​ will be in braces}, and my responses to her commentary will be italicized, since I’ve ah. Ranted to her about a lot of these before, and asked her to help proofread.

Elsword: Bullheaded, stubborn, and does not think very far ahead.

This is mostly thanks to the amount that they've built up Elsword's defensive options lately. The changes to Autoguard mean that Knight Emperor doesn't really have to worry even if he gets caught (I've had more games turned around thanks to that than I care to admit). Infinity Stoic is still a thing, not in the least helped by the large number of quick, stoic approaches and normals he has. Melee Elsword gameplay basically rewards LEEROY JENKINS. Rune Masters are surprisingly rare.

Aisha: Still Bullies.

This has always been the case. Though lately I've come to the realization that Aisha, and Void Princess' line in particular, usually stays out of PvP unless she has access to something dangerously close to hacking. Meditate+Trans slot cooldown drops are always popular, but Oz Sorcerer lives and dies depending on whether she can pretend-hack or not (looking at you, Angkor Millions and Shadow Body). Metamorphy's population likewise dropped drastically as soon as they nerfed the stoic on her >>X(Z). {Her damage output was also hit hard by the Impact Zone nerf in PvE.}

Rena: Slime.

There's been a lot of complaining about the changes to the NF system, though honestly it's probably better for PvP-health in the long term. Now, instead of basically being guaranteed to eat 3 cancelled Violent Attacks to the face in the middle of every single combo, you probably only have to worry about it happening once or twice per game. They're still really slippery, thanks in large part to physics bending over backwards around her and >>Z being so fast, though their PvP numbers have taken a drastic drop since the nerf.

Raven:

Basically only the oldest Raven mains are left, a corps of elite veterans who know their character and yours inside and- oh and I guess you have the bandwagon RH horde. {Man the bias is practically dripping out of your mouth here Ketsu.} The majority of my Raven matches are against players who I recognize on sight, though. The canon Raven has certainly been getting spoiled, comparatively speaking, though the fact that KoG nerfed M.Maximum Drive almost immediately is a good sign. RH is still probably the most consequence-free Raven at the moment; he doesn't really have to worry about taking combos because it's extremely likely he'll be able to mash a Spread out and revenge-catch you if there's even the tiniest delay or mistake.

{PvE is full of old, rich, Ravens as well. BMs/FBs especially are the oldest and most funded. Yeah they know their class in and out, but they’re also not above shelling out $200 to +11 that glorious Void weapon. VCs are dead.}

Eve: Nasod Bitch. Runs on money. {はい、はい。}

Eve on the whole is very confrontation-adverse, and all three of her classes avoid direct combat. Good thing for her, too; aside from the Exotic line Eve's combo game is so poor she can barely hold anyone in place on her own. All three Eves have very strong utilities kits which are supposed to come with a weak damage-per-hit ratio, but Eve players are already very strongly conditioned to spoil her rotten. Nobody's ever been accused of spending too little on her, after all. Codes 4v1 and Sariel both just dunk on melee-centric characters, and Ultimate has enough unsafe-cancels and core synergy that you'll be spending more time eating lasers than spears. {Like I’ve been saying for the past four years, Eve’s Core Release system was built for CN. Of course she has the best Core synergy out of all Eves.} Illusion Thorns' debuff field really should not trigger core. Raven's lingering skill effects (grenade fires and smoke clouds) have NEVER triggered his core, and those at least deal damage, but I guess even KoG isn't tired of spoiling Eve just yet. {Maybe it’s because Illusion Thorns’ debuff area only lasts a measly two seconds compared to Raven’s lingering AoEs (dead laugh).} Raven’s lingering AoEs also only last for a couple seconds, too, though. {oh.}

Chung: HERE I GO. {HERE I GO!!}

Hoo boy. Okay. After the absolute Chung dominance in the 1v1 tournament, there's been a significant rise in Chung PvP populations. Sure, Base Chung has Heavy Stance to mitigate being slow and getting caught, but these three basically never have to deal with such puny things as "consequences" and Heavy Stance itself has actually been vanishingly rare. {DC really should not have so many Heavy Stance/stoic opportunities, given that his whole backstory is based around being faster and thus, being less defensive. IP’s ridiculously high attack speed is abnormal and needs to die. Even back in S1 it was a pain to deal with…} Back Blast and Reload are core skills not because of utility or reload, but because they're such hard to deal with panic buttons when strung together. Cannonball management is a total farce. Super spoiled, getting amazing tools and mod skills with each update. A few significant differences between them:

Comet: Basically indestructible. Will not die. A rocket powered turtle who can strike you from anywhere in the map and always has an advantageous position. The new goddess of PvP, stripping Yama Raja of the title. You could just tell that a couple of the tournament finalists were screwing around and winning anyway, and that flagrant disregard for consequences has been adopted by the bandwagoners. {I feel like having one of the IP semifinalists intentionally handicap himself of the class’ best skills, fool around, and still manage a strong victory.. Really says a lot about the class’ current standing.}

Phantom: Homing Ruthless attacks for days. Mod Shooting Star caused a lot of passive ruthless to get stripped, but I guess there was enough of a Chung tantrum that they got it back on base Shooting Star AND in M.Burning Punisher. Could probably win a game blindfolded thanks to all the high-damage homing at his disposal. A non-berserk awakening is so rare you honestly think it's a glitch. {Remember when it was only like a 25% activation chance. lmao.}

Centurret: After a long and arduous process of moderately intelligent cockroaches bashing on keyboards tested every possible configuration, tactics have been finely reduced to "if your dog craps on enough lawns, someone is going to step in it." Instant-hit Grav Shots are far more than any character deserves, especially when they have practically no vertical limit, and whoever approved of this as an Siege mode option should be spaghettified.

Ara:

Lately, the number of Aras who fully depend on the X or ^X loop has gone down. Devi is still incredibly oppressive, able to basically slam their face on the skill bar whenever they're in trouble to turn it around with any one of their many, many incredible utility actives (with skill storage). Shakti populations have been on the rise in comparison, though as a Shakti main myself I can't really comment on any other trends without being... more biased than usual. {Dead in PvE, though very willing to shell out money. More-so than other Ara classes, I find (even Devis, yes!)} Apsaras generally rely way too much on Kite or Suppression and barely have two brain cells to rub together, having godawful combo maintenance outside of the aforementioned X loop, despite Ara's strong kit. {They changed how ZZXX works how else am I supposed to do fancy combos nowwwww} It feels like if they did have any more to work with they would've job changed to Devi by now.

Elesis:

Population is in decline, but still powerful. Empire Sword still has some of the most safe combo maintenance in the game, and it's exceedingly rare for her to make anything remotely resembling a mistake. {The fact that she has such a high DPS ratio in PvP really hurts, what gives.} INJECTION finally got the nerf it deserved and is starting to sound like a word again. Fire Wallsis is still horrifically oppressive if it goes off, however, and reduces many games against her to "play perfectly or die."

Add:

Doom Bringers are vanishingly rare. Dominators basically all spontaneously ceased to exist once Charged Impulsar got nerfed and they realized they'd actually have to try in PvP again. Paradox is, once again, the most popular PvP Add, and for some reason still has an infinite. Purple is the color of bullies, it turns out. {Death to purples.}

Lu: Almost as Leeroy Jenkins as Elsword, but not a large sample to work with.

If the dive that magnetically homes in on targets wasn't enough of a giveaway, Lu's ability to zero in on a target is still very high. Diangelion's switch-attacks have the same bizarre hitboxes and gravity as ever. Lu in general seems to be about throwing giant hitboxes around the map and hoping they hit something, and her combo game is so safe that there really isn't need for precision there, either. {If she can’t hit you with a command normal or a skill, she’ll lag you out with her FPS-killing abilities. Surprisingly not very high up on the whale list, and even lower on the whales-for-fashion list.}

Ciel mains still don't exist. {Nobu would be sad to hear this.}

Rose: Rich, but shallow.

You're basically not even a Rose main if you don't have an 11+, the same way you're basically not a Chung main if you can't get 4+ X-drops in a single launch. {I am apparently no longer a Rose/F. Gunner main. Okay.} Their gameplay shows no personality to speak of, and you'll be fighting the same kind of Rose tactics at Rank C that you will at Star. Despite being the only non-Chung in the 1v1 Finals, Minerva has actually seen something of a population decrease lately. I imagine a lot of players disliked the fact that the player got to finals by using a Freeze Grenade infinite. 

{POs seem like one of the most funded Rose classes, despite being lowtier in both PvP and PvE. About 20% of them have an elitist complex, and another 40% only play her because “OMG MECHA WAIFU”. I’ve only encountered like two POs who acknowledge that she feels and plays nothing like her DFO counterpart, and the fact that I had to argue with a super stubborn NA forumer about this is flat-out stupid. Ah, also. TBs are dead now. Unsurprisingly.}  PvP Rose is actually mostly TB thanks to her pseudo-meditate.

Ain: I was horribly, terribly, no-good very bad wrong about the prediction last time.

PvP Ain is as homogenous across all three paths as Rena: {はい、はい。} Base Ain normals are so strong that the only ones his other classes really use are dives. Otherwise, you can treat all Ains the same. Watch out for airdashes, stomps, Xes, and basically a full kit of backwards melee hitboxes (we got rid of that on the Polar Bear suit for a reason, right? Right??) which are all so strong that, even though the bug has been patched out, Schwert Platzen is still a core PvP skill for all Ains. Bluhen is very rare in PvP, due mostly to the fact that he doesn't have a dive combo. Richter basically plays "The floor is lava" the entire game. The stomp noise is as annoying and stuck in my head as Aisha's "HYA" voice clip now and is a standout among Ain's generally obnoxious sound design. {Maybe if KoG gave us more combo options my fellow Richters wouldn’t have to sink this low.}

his german is off but i appreciate the effort.

#Elsword #elsword pvp #Neophix is rambling again #long post

[darkspellmaster]

You really hate R!Ciel , calling him selfish and jealous when the one with such qualities is no one other than Our!ciel ! I get it , Real Ciel loves his brother in a scary way , but he is only a child . He never looked down at his brother , he even said he is proud of him already . he took care of him very well , the only thing he had done bad to his brother was asking him to give up on his dream but then he let this idea go . Stop saying bullshits just because you are Cie X Lezzi fan.

I”m honestly going to give this answer a longer one during the week since I nedd some time to gather some research on the tropes that I’m seeing in Real Ciel and why I honestly think that the kid is way darker and far more dangerous, and quiet possibly the person that may have been behind the whole situation in his parents murder. At this moment I’m going on a strong hunch and due to the fact that a LOT of Kuroshitsuji’s elements in story telling feel very much influenced by the work of Kaori Yuki, a pioneer of gothic manga, and who’s work still influences a lot of writers to this day. But in order to give you a short reply on your comments…1. I don’t exactly hate Real Ciel, I do not trust him though, and find him rather repulsive for various reasons. One being that he willingly allowed Agni to be killed by a person who was far more brutal then Sebastian has been recently, and honestly seems to have no problem with shooting an innocent person in all this, Soma. Even if he didn’t know who Soma was, he should have, at the very least, not reacted by shooting him then attacking him and wanting to kill him. This is not the actions of someone who has any good intentions. 2. He willingly is keeping Lizzy from her family. Given Edward’s reaction, I doubt that either Frances or Alexis know about what’s going on with their daughter. Now you could argue that they’re in on this, but I really don’t think that’s the case at all. So if he’s honestly a person that could be seen as caring, as Our Ciel has, he would have, at the very least, allowed her to return home with her family, or told her too. It seems that he is either being used by someone, and manipulating Lizzy due to being manipulated himself, or that he’s actually willingly keeping here there and holding her by giving only his side of the story. That is not to say that Our Ciel isn’t at fault for this either, but his actions  are very much reminding me of a character by the name of Jezebel from the God Child Saga by Kaori Yuki, which again I will get into in that longer post. To me the fact that he’s still keeping her there, even if she’s doing so willingly, says a lot about how he’s seen their relationship vs. how Our Ciel has seen her and grown with her. 3. He’s shown signs in various scenes that he’s possessive of Ciel, that he clearly doesn’t want anyone but himself to be with his younger brother. There are moments that his face, when Ciel talks about leaving and going off on his own, showing that he doesn’t want this, and clearly this is setting up for something else, because we’re not seeing inside his head. We’re seeing how he was seen through Our Ciel, meaning that we really don’t know how he perceives his twin, as we’ve only seen what Our Ciel has seen. Thus, the only thing we have is “Ciel is a good person because that’s what he outwardly shows me.” Even though we never see what Real Ciel is thinking since most of the time he’s only voicing some thoughts and not all of what he’s thinking. Second point, do I think that Real Ciel is Jealous and Selfish. Well yes, I do. Consider this…We know that he doesn’t like the idea of Our Ciel leaving him, even suggesting he become a vicar on the estate so he doesn’t go far. To me that’s very telling that he doesn’t think he can manage things without Our Ciel. Our Ciel notes that he’ll have Lizzy and others to help him and Real Ciel seems okay with it, but also not so much. Later on we see Rachel giving a talk to Real Ciel about learning things, as he doesn’t want to be the Earl. This also is important as this is used a lot in stories to give hints that the character is jealous of a sibling or other person that doesn’t have the same responsibilities. Even if Our Ciel is jealous of Real Ciel, it’s clear that he’s jealous of him too over the fact that he won’t be having to be the Earl and make the choices that, eventually Our Ciel has to make, will be very hard for him while Our Ciel gets to make toys and lead a very natural and normal life, something that Real Ciel seems to want to share with him, or want him to share in the role of the Earl. But again without seeing inside his head we don’t know what he’s thinking, and that is part of the reason I’m thinking that there’s something darker with him then what Our Ciel sees. Consequently, with dramatic story telling, usually a twin brother, who even when they are nice to the main character, in dramatic stories, will normally be the Cain to the main character’s Able. I’m suspecting that this will be Real Ciel playing the Cain part. You say he never looked down at his brother, but again this is only the memories that Ciel has shown. Yet we know that Real Ciel can be down right hurtful of others, even if he “doesn’t mean it” as we’ve seen with Lizzy when he told her that he thought that strong women were scary. You can say that that was an innocent comment from a kid who thinks his Aunt is too hard, sure, but it’s still a damaging comment and, given what role Lizzy would have played to Real Ciel, more then likely a Sebastian part in being his right hand and killing people with her skills as a swordswoman, is it any surprise that she reacted the way she did and how it harmed her. Then we see his comments to Our Ciel when he comes in. It’s sweet, but talking down to him. Saying that now that he’s here Our Ciel doesn’t need anyone else. Commenting on his illness, etc. These are not kind words, these are not words that are meant to be nice or sweet or loving. These are words that are digs at Our Ciel for not only taking the ring, but probably for surviving and going forward with his plans. This kid has been warped and clearly his love of his brother is screwing him up to the point that he, again, attacked an innocent young man who had nothing to do with his brother’s revenge plot. Yes he is proud, but being proud could have many many meanings. He could genuinely be proud, or this could be the sort of proud you give your pet when he’s not gone to the bathroom on the floor. Again this very much reminds me of characters from Kaori Yuki’s works, and how the main character Cain of the count Cain saga, had his father, who’s not a nice man at all…trying to kill his son, says that he’s proud of the man he’s become. Coming from an antagonist, which clearly Real Ciel is being set up as -again, killing Agni and shooting Soma - you then have the term proud becoming something far darker in nature. It’s the sort of proud that indicates that he’s just impressed that someone weaker and smaller then him managed to crawl up as high as he has. And given that Real Ciel is supposedly mad at Our Ciel, it seems to be likely that the proud factor comes from the fact that he managed to take on and do things that Real Ciel didn’t think Our Ciel would ever be able to do. Okay let’s take a moment and really look at the fact that we’re seeing this from Our Ciel’s memories. It seems to me that to him Real Ciel was a hero, but we’ve already seen that this isn’t the case with various shots. We know that when the suggestion of the twins going to the school was brought up to Real Ciel he commented that the other students there would be “Fake Brothers” and there was a dead eyed look to him. Then while he does take care of him, he also at the same time doesn’t exactly allow for Our Ciel’s feelings to be considered. As we saw with the whole Halloween moment. Then we have a few other moments including a questionable vanishing act on the birthday, the whole reaction in the carriage ride where they were dropped off, and him sobbing because he was “scared” his thoughts on those under him, etc. We’re shown all the good things because Yana is setting up to show that there’s darker things to Real Ciel. 

And about the whole scene of letting go. I don’t think that’s the case at all. If that was true, why be so against his brother having anyone taking care of him when he shows up. Why is he clearly jealous of Soma being in the house. He Tells him to give up on his dream, but it doesn’t look like he’s over that idea, nor does it seem like in his return that he wants to have Our Ciel be on his own. It’s damn near clear given he tried to kill Soma to get Ciel’s attention. He doesn’t want Ciel to be on his own, that is not normal behavior. It’s one thing to be like “Okay I would rather have you working with me.” and another entirely different thing to say that Our Ciel only needs him, and then kills one of his friends because he’s angry. My view of Real Ciel doesn’t come from my view of Lizzy x Ciel. While I love the relationship, I’m not basing my view on that when it comes to Real Ciel. What I am basing it on is what we’ve seen with Lizzy, his actions against Soma, his comments to Ciel as well as the side glances and actions in the flash backs, and the fact that he very much seems to be a character who has similarities to two very large looming antagonist in Kaori Yuki’s series. That is where I’m getting my views on this. Not from any ship. I hope this at least answers a bit for why I’m looking at Real Ciel the way I am. Thank you for taking the time to write to me about this. 

#kuroshitsuji #real ciel #r!ciel #possible villain #antagonist #kaori yuki #yana tobasa #our ciel #o!ciel #answered question #black butler

[rainsonata]

Two Fools

Fandom/Pairing: Elsword; MMRS (can be read as platonic) Rating: K Word Count: 2,310

Summary: Both were emotional people, albeit that Add tried to be reserved with little success while Elsword wore his emotions on his sleeves. Although Elsword was saved from being consumed by the El after offering himself to it, his actions are met with silence when Add left without a word.  

Birthday gift for @zeloree

For the first time since he left Atlus Station, his mind was clear, and he felt like himself. The voice that once cluttered his head like a heavy fog has lifted after what felt like a long nap. There were more than ten of them now, but their pleads awakened the Rune Slayer and brought him back to the living world.

Without him to maintain its stability, the urgency on restoring the El to its former glory was at stake, but even Elsword couldn’t find himself to place too much pressure on that. He always believed in himself and his friends to find a solution to everything they faced. This wasn’t any different than before.

It was like nothing changed while he was gone. Or so he thought. Aisha and his sister reprimanded him for making foolhardy decisions and putting himself out there like that, with Eve even slapping him to get her feelings on the matter across. He was still rubbing his face later until Raven offered an ice pack to alleviate the pain. Rena didn’t yell at him, but she offered him more food than necessary at dinner and Ciel offered him a cookie, the one Lu insisted was the best. They planned on staying in Elysion for a few days to rest before packing up for their next destination. Amid catching up with everyone’s concern for his well-being, Elsword forgot one person.

Where was Add?

The last time he saw the scientist was when he woke up from his deep slumber, where Add uttered, “Get up, you nosy brat. How many times are you going to bother me?”

He said it with annoyance, but it didn’t reach his eyes and his voice was more robotic than Eve’s. Add refused to look at him after that and mumbled something about resupplying their inventory when asked where he was going. He hasn’t returned since then. It was past dinner when Elsword excused himself.

“I’m going to look for him,” Elsword said when Aisha stared at him. “His dinner is going to get cold.”  

Away from their house in Velder, there was no lab for the Mastermind to hide in. He couldn’t have ventured far from their campsite. Elysion was lit up like a lantern when Elsword left to search for the scientist. Even at night the city refused to sleep. The streets were somewhat crowded and occupied by nasods, all of Adrian’s creations.

Like Hamel, Elysion’s architecture was carved in white and gold, out of material he didn’t recognize from Elrios. The buildings had white rooftops gold outlines and patterns traced over the edges. The only organic beings in the city were the cherry blossom trees that never lost their petals when Elsword ran past them. The signs directed him to the city plaza, where he found the familiar sight of a white-haired man sitting under a purple roofed pillar with his legs hanging over the edges.

“Add!” Elsword waved to get the other’s attention.

He ran over to the scientist to sit beside him and stretched out his arms to yawn. It was a breathtaking view, he could see the cherry blossoms in bloom from where they sat. There was a manmade pond beneath the building where he could dip his feet into if he wanted to. But that wasn’t what he was looking at.

Add rested his head against one of the pillars supporting the roof and didn’t turn his head to greet the redhead. His face was calm with his eyes averting his gaze, staring at the cherry blossoms with newfound interest.

“It’s pretty here, isn’t it?” Elsword said when the other didn’t answer. “Where have you been? Everyone’s been worried about you.”

Or at least some of them did, Elsword thought. Aisha huffed when he announced his leave, but let him go when it became clear that he had no intentions on returning until Add was back. Rena was more empathetic and promised to keep Add’s food warm in the meantime. Eve and Ain nodded, but he could tell that their opinion and his on the scientist weren’t mutual. A few of the others saw it as normality for him to show worry about one of their teammates gone missing and offered to join him, but Elsword declined. He knew this had to be just them because he didn’t appreciate having an audience if something was personal enough to make Add leave out of the blue.      

“That’s a lie.”

He looked up at the scientist in surprise when he finally uttered a short sentence. Confused, Elsword tugged on Add’s long jacket sleeve. Why wasn’t he looking at him? Was Add upset because it took them so long to figure out that their situation was beyond Solace after so many detours through Sander and Lanox?  

“You probably came here because you noticed I was gone,” Add said. “Here you go again, playing the hero. You have guts to come here after what you did.”

“What do you mean?” Elsword tried to understand when he recognized that Add was unhappy with him.

He wasn’t afraid of the scientist’s changed mood, but was troubled by it. The redhead was used to seeing Add upset on failed experiments or when things didn’t go his way, but this emotion felt different. Add was furious.             

“Do you know how long you were out, red bean?” Add growled, “The El is powered by people who resonate with it and the first thing you do is offer yourself to it like a sacrificial lamb. I didn’t know you wanted to become lamb chop.”

Elsword winced at Add’s lack of mincing words. While he appreciated Add’s food metaphors, this was not how he envisioned the scientist on using them. Couldn’t Add laugh this off like he did for all his other mistakes and drop it already? It wasn’t as bad as Add made it sound.   

“I don’t know, lamb chop is delicious,” he laughed when Add glared at him.

Uh oh, this wasn’t good. Was he stupid to find amusement in the other’s anger? There was something endearing about seeing that yes, the cold hearted scientist was capable of showing worry, even if Add was stubborn about it. Sometimes, Elsword couldn’t help but say what was on his mind without thinking, just to see Add show more of his emotional side.    

Elsword said, “This isn’t about me. If the El continued being hosted by El Lady-”

“The same would happen to you,” he said with annoyance. “Consumed by it until you cease to exist. Do you have some kind of hero complex and enjoy giving yourself away to everyone?”

“You say that as if it’s a terrible thing,” Elsword said.

Hero complex? That had to be the first time he heard of that, Elsword mused to himself. He couldn’t understand why Add saw it as an insult. Wasn’t it a good thing on wanting to help people? He was treating them the same as he would have wanted others to treat him, so it was okay, wasn’t it?   

“It is when you disregard how everyone feels and throw yourself away like you’re worthless,” Add tucked his head down to hide his face. When Elsword tried looking at him, he blinked his eyes a lot and scowled.

“Does that mean you think I’m not worthless?” Elsword forced a smile, but even he was having a tough time doing that when Add didn’t return one. Add wasn’t going to be mad at him forever, was he? “I just did what I thought was best for everyone.”

“I’m not talking about everyone,” Add blurted out, no longer caring that he was too loud or that the nasods stopped in their monotonous tracks to look at the outburst he was causing. “I’m talking about you. Did it ever occur to you that nobody wanted this? Do you know how long it took them to find your body before that dragon told us where you went?

“What do you mean where my body went?” Elsword stopped him. His physical body, it still existed if he was standing in front of Add. What happened to it back there? He was asleep with his mind drifting away from his subconscious, but he couldn’t remember where he was. The sinking feeling he had was making him uneasy.   

“Your body disappeared,” the scientist said. “For all we know, you could have been dead. At least tell someone what was going on in that musclehead of yours before running off. And your sister...she didn’t tell us about the voices in her head until after you disappeared!”

Elesis heard them too? Elsword scratched the back of his head in wonder, then remembered what Solace told him. It was El Lady who tried to contact him and his sister, a cry for help that led to all of this. Everything was beginning to make sense now that he was back with the living with the capacity to think again.

“Okay, the first one is my fault,” Elsword admitted. “The second one, that’s all of sis, not me.”

Add’s hair slid down with the rest of his ponytail, lower than the usual. His side bangs were a mess, tangled from the scientist tugging on them out of habit when stressed or impatient. His collar was low enough that Elsword could see the scar on his neck peeking out. With his half-lidded eyes and melancholy expression, Elsword felt a pang of guilt when he realized Add likely hasn’t slept in days because he wasn’t there to remind him.      

“Forget what I said,” he shook his head. “That was selfish and irrational of me to say. I do mean the last part, though. At least talk to pineapple first if something changed about you. At least she has more of a brain than you.”

“You really don’t understand, do you?” Elsword said with exasperation, “I thought of everything. It was either lose everything or my sister. She’s all I have left! Losing sis would mean losing the person who made me what I am. If I lost my friends or you because I thought she was more important… I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I couldn’t have either. You think I wanted any of this?”  

It was true that he didn’t know much of Add’s family or his past because the scientist always kept shut about the topic, but even the scientist knew how much Elesis meant to him. He fought strong demons and if he had to, take on one of the El Masters to protect his sister. But sacrificing his friends and the world for Elesis wasn’t something that sat right with him.  

Learning that Elesis attracted El Lady’s attention was when Elsword had to begin taking serious considerations on what to do with his life. It was when he saw Solace trying to save El Lady did he realize he didn’t want the same to happen if Elesis was to offer herself to the El. It only seemed fair that he traded his life for hers. A life for a life.

Elsword knew that he wasn’t as smart as Aisha or adept in technology as Add or Eve, but he knew his will to charge in and initiate change was his strength. It still hurt when people underestimated him and assumed he didn’t think things through. He was reckless, but he wasn’t stupid, or at least that’s what he told himself. It wasn’t like he decided to sacrifice himself on the whim, not before considering all his other options. Although without his friends, he wouldn’t be here and never would have thought of searching for an alternative energy.    

“She was your only family…” Add looked at him with what looked like guilt, “And here I was calling you stupid. Perhaps I’m the idiot for judging you so quickly.”

Was Add apologizing? There were no take backs or the scientist making light of things. No feeble excuses with Add being too stubborn to admit his mistakes, or thank heavens if he was capable of having emotions like most human beings. He was awkward sitting next to Elsword with his head slumped down and his back slouched. Elsword reached out to wrap his arm around Add and silently cheered when the other didn’t reject his gesture. Add shook when he hugged him with his arms around his neck. It made the scientist look vulnerable. It felt wrong.      

“I’m sorry you’re upset, but that was my decision,” Elsword rubbed the other’s back. “You’re not the only one who disagreed with it.”

And he had the slap marks on his face to prove it too.  

“Naturally,” Add buried his head into the other’s shoulder and closed his eyes when Elsword patted his fluffy hair. “But that still makes you a fool.”    

“I know.”

“Unlike your goody two shoe friends, I won’t go easy on you if I catch you sacrificing yourself so you could play the martyr again.”

Elsword laughed at the empty threat, “Is that a duel I hear? I can take you on.”

Add chuckled at his response and shook his head as if he couldn’t believe his audacity to say that. He was probably calmer than Elsword anticipated because the knight was brushing his fingers through his hair.    

Elsword knew the scientist was serious about stopping him, but he understood why. He would have done the same if their roles reversed. They stayed there for a while, neither of them wanting to move until Add’s stomach growled, earning him an embarrassed laugh and nudging them to return to their campsite. The confused looks from their friends when Add announced that he was going to help them pack tomorrow for the trip made Elsword laugh. Despite Add insisting he was selfish more than once, he didn’t think the scientist was a bad person.

#elsword #eltag #Add (Elsword) #Elboy #MMRS #Elsword fanfiction #my writing #mywriting #I just realized I forgot to put this fic on queue oh no #AddEls is such a cute ship I love their potential interactions #and the anime is only making me wish they had more screentime together #happy bday mochi hope this fills your MMRS needs #Elboy please stop doing this to yourself ;;;;; #petition for Elboy to be protected and to stop sacrificing himself

[worldofadvent]

NEO World of Advent Chapter Three

The sky over the gigantic hulk of metal known to many of as the Resistance was still, a dark shroud permeated by an innumerable measure of tiny gleaming lights stretched far above. It was a good night for stargazing, something Cero, the Advent child of Zero and Ciel, was none too keen on missing.

He was followed by a reploid with a red coloration. His father. The reploid’s expression was distant, unreadable. By now Cero had learned to interpret even subtle changes in Zero’s normally stoic demeanor, and could tell that his father was curious as to why Cero had brought him there, at this early time in the morning.

“Haven’t you ever been stargazing before, Dad?” Cero hung his feet over the edge of the top floor. “You can’t ever do it in Neo Arcadia. Too many lights there.”

“I was made to fight mavericks, Cero.” Zero sighed, and sat down beside his son all the same. “I wasn’t intended for astronomy.”

“This isn’t about astronomy,” Cero explained, a hint of mirth betraying a laugh. “All you ever think about is practical stuff. Hasn’t Mom taught you by now that there’s more to life than that?”

A grunt. If Zero had indeed learned of life’s finer aspects, he wasn’t eager to share them at this time.

Cero shook his head in mock despair. “Surely even Maverick Hunters did some things for fun?”

Zero thought about it for a moment. “Sometimes we would visit our friends. It was fun to go on missions with them…”

“Something other than missions, Dad.”

Zero smiled, a rare sign of unguarded expression that he reserved for only the closest of friends and his small family. “You remind me of an old friend of mine. His name was Axl. He was a wild card, for sure. I’m sure he’d know what to tell you something we did for fun.”

Cero was silent for a moment. “You almost never talk about your life before the Resistance. Who was he?”

“Axl? He was a goofy, fun-loving, prankster of a machine. But he was also one of the better maverick hunters the world would see, something I admit I didn’t see at first.”

“What happened?” Cero was careful not to look his father directly in the eye.

“An old enemy brought him down,” Zero said. “It came out of nowhere. X… he tried to save him, but it was too late. Too many Hunters died in the old days. It was a chaotic time.”

“There’s a saying,” Cero said, “That the greatest hunters are immortalized in the stars. An ancient civilization had this hero they called Orion. Maybe Axl is up there with them.”

Zero looked up at the heavens emblazoned with stars. “Perhaps. But we reploids have a different concept of the afterlife. We call it Cyberspace.”

Cero dangled his feet against the edge of the Caravan. “Where do you think I will go when I die? I’m not human or a reploid. I’m an Advent.”

“Maybe you get to choose,” Zero said. The thought seemed to amuse him. “You could be the bridge between your mother and I, perhaps. Let’s hope that day doesn’t come for some time, alright?”

Cero nodded. “I know. It’s just something I’ve been giving a lot of thought lately. You know, where we end up when we die. Do you think Light and Cipher are watching over us somewhere?”

Zero closed his eyes. Cero immediately felt regret at mentioning his two brothers, said to have been taken at an early age by the renegade Umera, believed dead. Not many things could bring Zero visible pain, but the loss of his two eldest children was one of them.

“I hope so,” Zero said at last. “Maybe Axl is up there, corrupting their young minds with practical jokes. I can only hope X is also there to keep them in check.”

“X. He was your oldest friend, right? The one Copy X was based off of?”

Zero nodded. “Yes, he was. He was a strong believer in peace, much like your mother. He was as good, if not better than I am at fighting. He was a good Hunter and a better friend. I miss him, at times.” The old reploid grew quiet, almost as if he had said too much.

“It must be rough, losing someone,” Cero said. “I don’t want to ever lose you or Mom.”

Zero ruffled the blonde hair of his youngest child. “I don’t think you’ll have to worry about that for some time, either. Not while I’m around to look after her.”

The door that lead to the interior of the Caravan closed shut, footsteps betraying the presence of another person in the vicinity. Neither Zero or Cero turned around; only one person knew where they would be at the time.

“Please, Zero,” Ciel said. “As if you don’t need looking after either. I swear,” she addressed her son, “If I didn’t make sure he got enough E-crystals, he’d run himself dry one of these days.”

Ciel sat down to the left of Cero, sandwiching hi between his parents. “Stargazing, are we?”

“Sort of,” Zero offered. “What brings you out here so early?”

“I finished my symposium of energy-based crystals early, so I thought I’d go see how my two favorite soldiers are doing.”

“We’re fine Mom,” Cero said. “The sun’s about to rise anyway. Hey, do you think I can get a transfer to Neo Arcadia sometime today? There’s this new Slider out that I really want to try…”

“You know the rules,” Ciel said. “Chores first. Then training. Then, if it’s not too late, maybe. Zero?”

Zero nodded briefly in assent. “I want to see you at combat training shortly after noon. Don’t be late.”

The reploid stood up, offering a hand to Ciel, lifting her up as well. “Until then, check to see if Colbur has anything for you to do.”

Cero nodded glumly. “Yes, Dad.” Cero watched his parents disappear from the morning light into the artificial luminescence of the Resistance. Distantly, he pondered the probability of Colbur telling on him if he didn’t do his chores, but thought against it.

Colbur could always be found on the same floor as the CMD Room. The Command Room was where most missions were given and soldiers dispatched, fortunately having grown mostly unused from lack of necessity. Nowadays the only use people had for it was to transfer to one area to the other. Usually Neo Arcadia.

Cero approached the reploid, whose head was currently buried in paperwork of some sort casually. “Hey Colbur. You don’t have any chores for me today, do you?”

Colbur looked up from whatever business he had with the pamphlet and nodded. “As a matter of fact, I do.”

Cero’s head drooped at this news, but he quickly regained enough posture to ask what it was he was assigned to do that day. “What is it?”

“You don’t have to act so glum about it!” Colbur laughed. “No, Cero. To be honest, this is your mother’s early birthday present to you. If you head to the nursery, you can pick it up.”

“The nursery?” Cero thought for a moment. “You don’t mean? My own – is it an elf?!”

Colbur smiled. “You’ll just have to see.”

Cero ran out the door, vaulting himself past people in the hallway, who were halfway into scolding him until they saw that it was the son of the Resistance leaders. In a carriage two sections down, Allouette was holding a bright orange-gold Cyber Elf.

“I could hear you coming all the way from here,” Allouette remarked lightly. “Were you racing anyone?”

“No Aunt ‘Lou,” Cero said bashfully. “Colbur said Mom got me an Elf.”

“Did he now?” Alouette frowned. “That was supposed to be a surprise.”

“Well, I more or less guessed as much,” Cero said. “So is that it? Did I get an Elf?”

“Yes, Cero.” Allouette held out the small orb for Cero to hold. “Her name is Clover. Like Croire, your father’s old elf, this elf can possess various abilities. She’s still very young though, so be careful with her. She’s not yet ready for combat, either.”

“Do I get to keep her in my room?”

Allouette shook her head. “Until Clover opens her eyes, she’s not mature enough. When that day comes, she can take on a physical form similar to that of a human or reploid, in her choosing. Then you can train her like Croire.”

“How old do cyber elves live?” Cero asked. “I remember Croire when I was a kid.”

“Well,” Allouette said, “It varies. Some elves can live for a very, very long time such as animal elves. Nurse elves and hacker elves tend to live shorter lives. An elf such as Clover will possess characteristics of all three, so I can’t really be sure. Croire lived to be about ten years old.”

“Oh.” Cero frowned. “I thought they lived longer than that. Is there any way to extend their life cycle?”

“I assume so,” Allouette said. “As a matter of fact, I’ve been working on something like that. It’s a joint project your mother and I have been working on for a long time, actually.”

“If anyone can do it it’s you two,” Cero said earnestly. “I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

“Thank you for your note of confidence,” Allouette said. “Now, Clover eats quite a lot for an elf her size, so I need you to find me some large Energy Crystals. I believe Hibou can help you with that.”

“Sure thing!” Cero handed Clover back to Allouette and dashed outside. The energy hub of the Caravan was mostly obsolete, due to the Ciel-System being in place, but occasionally newborn elves had to be fed from energy crystals, thus preserving the usefulness of the hub.

Hibou stood guard outside the door. He was a very slightly pudgy reploid who constantly reminded people that he was on a diet. Zero once told Cero that he had lost a lot of weight, actually.  Hibou gave Cero a salute when he saw him.

“How is Master Cero doing today?” Hibou asked.

“Please,” Cero said, “I told you – it’s just Cero.”

“Well then, ‘Just Cero,’ Hibouu said, “What is it that brings you to the Energy hub? Not many people stop by to visit. Or come at all as a matter of fact…”

“I just need some energy crystals,” Cero said. “Powerful ones, if you can help it.”

“I can indeed,” Hibou said. “Hold on one minute. Actually, why not come inside? I can show you around.”

Cero entered the door left open by Hibou as the reploid entered the Energy Hub. Inside, a stream of blue energy veins could be seen streaking across the room, curving and convalescing into the domed ceiling. A massive machine stood in the middle, generating energy. Cero recognized it as one of his mother’s Ciel System prototypes.

“Ah I see you’ve found the Generator,” Hibou said, following Cero’s gaze. “That produces most of the energy we use in the Caravan. We don’t need anything fancy, so this older model does just fine. I’ve heard that Neo Arcadia has one as large as this whole caravan. And it’s a newer model, too!”

“Wow.” Cero couldn’t help but be impressed. “That must generate a lot of energy.”

“It does,” Hibou agreed. “But, that being said, the people of Neo Arcadia use a lot of energy as well. And we both know what happens when they run out of energy sources.”

The two of them shared a grim moment of silence for the reploids who had been falsely accused of being a maverick under the cruel regime of Copy X.

Hibou beckoned Cero further into the room, where in one of the shelves, a large stack of crystals rested neatly in rows of three. A few hummed gently, visible reminders of the portable sources of power they contained.

Hibou wrapped those crystals up, handing them to Cero. “Here you go. And do be sure to tell Allouette how helpful I am, will you? And er, handsome, if you will.”

Cero snorted. “Why don’t you tell her yourself?”

“I have a job to do,” Hibou said defensively. “Besides, it’s not like Allouette would ever go out with a reploid like me anyway...”

Cero took the reploid’s gloomy silence as a queue to leave, thanking him before shutting the door. Crystals in hand, Cero made his way toward the Nursery—more carefully this time. HE didn’t want to risk dropping the crystals and causing a minor explosion.

Cero opened the door to the Nursery, careful to keep a tight grip on his packaged goods. “Aunt ‘Lou! I’m here. I brought those E Crystals you requested.”

“Thanks Cero.” Allouette placed one of the crystals in a slot on Clover’s incubator. “Just place them like so and Clover can feed off them when she’s hungry.”

“Cool.” Cero watched Clover float up to the end of the crystal and absorb it slowly. It was interesting for Cero to see Clover eat.

“I imagine your father will want to see you now,” Allouette said. “It’s about time for combat training.”

“Oh.” Cero forced a smile. “I mean, great! I’ll head over there now.”

“Cero.” Allouette gave him a concerned look. “How is your sparring going?”

“It’s great,” Cero said hollowly. “I love fighting.”

Allouette didn’t look convinced, but she let Cero go anyhow. “Go on then,” she said. “And do your best to give your father a few sores, will you?”

“I’ll try!” Cero called out, but by then he was already out the door.

Zero was waiting for him, two practice sabers pushed in the ground equal distance from each other in a ring. “You’re late,” he said.

“Sorry Dad,” Cero said. “I was feeding Clover.”

“You will address me as “Master” during this time, Cero,” Zero reminded him. “But yes, a good elf,” Zero said. “Take good care of her. Your mother worked hard to breed that particular elf. You had best not slack off like you do in combat practice.”

It was this last slight that had Cero cringe. As much as he tried to help it, he just felt clumsy with a sword. Even busters felt uneasy to him.

“Pick up your practice saber.” Zero held his own leveled at Cero’s chest.

Cero held his own sword unsteadily. When Zero rushed forward, he panicked and dropped the blade.

Zero raised an eyebrow. “What was that?”

“I er, panicked.” Cero said at last. “I know. I’ll practice. I know how bad I am at this.” \

Zero’s eyes hardened. “You said that last time, Cero. Now pick up the sword again. Back to the basics. For one, your stance is too wide. Hold your sword tighter. Listen…”

The lesson droned on for what seemed forever to Cero. When it finally ended, Zero said it was far from good, but acceptable. One of the Resistance members arrived with a bottle of water, which Cero drank greedily.

Cero eyed the practice saber wearily. It was bad enough that he hadn’t unlocked his Oversol yet, but he hadn’t even the skill to use a simple saber either. Sometimes Cero wished that he had been born with his father’s skill with weapons. It seemed to him that the only thing that came easily to him was his intellect.

The resistance member took the bottle from Cero, leaving him to his thoughts. It wasn’t as though he tried to be such a disappointment. It’s just that any sort of weapon seemed wrong to Cero. He felt useless with them, like they were an ugly, obtrusive third foot, far from the “Extension of one’s own arm” that his father kept spouting about.

Cero sighed, and kicked the saber irritably. At least there were a few hours left in the day. He could still manage to take a trip to Neo Arcadia and come back home before nightfall. All he had to do was convince his mother that he should be given a transfer.

Cero found Ciel at the head of the CMD, a fortunate position for him, as that was just where he wanted to be. “Mom!” he called out. “I finished my chores. I even sparred with Dad. Can I take that trip to Neo Arcadia now?”

Ciel pondered the request for a moment. “Yes, but be sure to be back when the sun sets, alright?”

“I’ll request a transfer back as soon as dusk settles,” Cero promised. “Thanks!”

Ciel shook her head, but smiled all the same. “That’s all he ever wants to be. I suppose his friends are there or something. I’ll handle the transfer. Stand ready.”

Cero nodded. “Ready!”

Ciel entered a sequence of numbers into the machine. Soon Cero was bathed in blue light, and found himself in the bustling streets of Neo Arcadia. Cero grinned, taking in the hustle of people running to and from their jobs, on Sliders, or taking public transportation. It was a stark difference from the rather bucolic life in the Resistance.

Cero thought for a moment, deciding eventually that it would be a good idea to check out the local tech. Deciding ultimately on a rather quaint shop in the middle of the lower reaches of the City, known as “Cipher Mechanics and Repair,” Cero stepped inside.

#megaman #megaman zero #mmz #capcom #long story #ocs #fanfic #fanfiction

[bitter--rabbit]

A rumble, heavy enough to rouse the lifeless curtains, awakened him in the most alarming fashion. Heaves of heavy breath threw his body into a panic before he could recollect his current state. The pitter patter of rain rapidly puddling through the screen and onto the wooden window sill told him it was storming heavily on the other side of this wall. The warmth of the fluffy navy comforter kept him dry and out of radius of the rain. Regardless, he was soaked, temple to jaw with sweat. It was difficult to decide exactly where he was and what current state the world was in. So much has happened, in so little time, it seems. The fall of everything, the losses...the ever so slight gains...

Ciel wiped his brow with the back of his forearm once he finally caught his breath and took careful note of his surroundings. Such a familiar setting. Familiar because it was his own bedroom. It smelled the same, all furniture in its usual place. His questioning blue eyes peered over at the opened window where the drapes fluttered in the gusts of wind that slipped in and out when it had the chance. He climbed from the mattress and his tousled blankets to quickly close the glass before anything else could get any damper. Then, a flash of lightning lit up what seemed to be the entire block before a rupture of thunder thudded against the atmosphere. Houses were...complete, with tidied lawns with the exception of torn leaves and broken branches due to the current storm. Cars drove freely along the road in front of his window, rushing to get home and out of the rain. Lights illuminated little windows, as well as his own. People lived in these homes. People drove these vehicles. People...were alive and present.

As he had begun to fail to adapt to the current setting of a typical evening in stormy London, he turned around and searched the perimeters some more. He never leaves his holster belt anywhere but on his bedpost. Protection had to be no further than within arms reach. Nothing. His machete, nowhere to be found. That was foolish of him to have misplaced his weapons. Unless...they’d been taken away. Were they no longer needed? It seemed there were too many of the living outside, all in one place. It was a sanctuary, right? A lot had happened the night he was bitten a second time. So much doubt and regret had spiraled into the haze of a coma that left him less than himself for the longest time. 

Of course. He was still dealing with the aftermath of it all. Things must have been solved, and society had begun to rebuild and multiply once more. Was the war over, then? Who did he manage to bring with him into this community? Ciel curiously stepped before his dresser drawers and pulled one open, finding a few pairs of jeans and pants. He grabbed a distressed, dark pair and took note of its attributes. ...Mass produced distress. One could always tell the difference. Tears and holes were scars and bullet wounds where he comes from. It displays to others where you’ve been, what you’ve been through. Even more curious, he lifted the denim up to his nose and inhaled the embedded scent. Clean, almost...floral. No earthy undertones, no high notes of dried blood and flesh. He furrowed his brows and slipped them on over his shorts anyway, feeling an odd sensation of wearing a pair of pants that hadn’t been lived in for months on end. It felt...uncomfortably familiar. 

As he collected more pieces of this cognitive puzzle, he almost feared what...or who...waited for him downstairs. With a hesitant turn of the handle, he pulled his bedroom door open and made quiet footsteps down the hall and the staircase. Photos were set in place, nothing looked to be in need of repair or refinishing. Everything was...just as normal as it could’ve been. The further he walked down the stairs, the more he took note of more familiar scents traveling through the air. Oh, that therapeutic aroma of freshly brewed coffee sent his heart swaying unsteadily. He couldn’t remember the last time he had smelled something so wonderful. A hint of darkly toasted bread followed after, the way he accidentally discovered was his favorite way to eat toast. The exact same way. How unusual all of this was. But he wasn’t at the grand finale just yet.

As though he had potentially died with his luck and found a psychological sanctuary, he was frightened to lose track of his current thoughts when he spotted the most familiar nostalgia in the kitchen, a woman with golden blonde hair that never fell out of place, that never looked unkempt. A melodious hum filled her aura as she stirred a concoction at the stove in what he remembered to be her favorite morning robe when it was gloomy and she needed to eliminate such feelings from the ball of light she was made of. His mother. She lived after all.

Ciel stood in awe, disbelief in the doorway of the kitchen, as though he couldn’t make sense of such an ordinary situation. But like clockwork, as if she expected it, the woman smiled and set her spoon down on the counter, before guiding his stone-line body to the table. “Oh, dear, you always look at me like that everyday. Today’s another day, I still haven’t gone anywhere. Now, come sit and get your fix, hm?” His heart fluttered with so many feelings that didn’t seem to fit the setting at all. Was he not supposed to be surprised by any of this? His face felt feverish again; he simply couldn’t just settle here with a cup of coffee. He’d burn up and his heart would explode. He eyed his plate of nearly burnt toast, slathered with butter and jam, perfectly made just for him, and then he eyed the empty chairs at the table. “Your father left for work already,” she peeped in, as though she were able to read his mind. The clock hanging over the doorway ticked at 8:49 AM. ...She’s right. This was around the time his father would have already been getting situated at his office. He then observed the fourth chair, as if someone else were meant to be remembered. His heart ached for someone. ...But who? Someone who he promised would never leave behind. But had he done just that?

“...Elizabeth!” He was struck with a name that was put at the top of a mental priority list. Why did he forget momentarily? A neutral enemy who turned out to be the most important living creature of his entire life, suddenly not within his proximity like he promised? He swore to protect her against all of the horrible things that had happened in his world and swore that a new world would come of what he can offer. He was the cure, remember? If the world outside is now safe, he is the true savior of this entire society. So where was she? Was she still on the defense line? Was there still an outbreak? “Oh god, she’s not still out there, is she? She shouldn’t be--I told her not t-” Arms slipped around his shoulders from behind where he sat at the kitchen table and a gentle press of lips to the top of his head raised a flag for personal alarm. “Darling...my sweet boy...we have a long way to go...” A slight waver in her voice left him unsettled. Her pampering was compassionate, but with unnecessary hospitality. 

“...Mom, I just need to know where she--” A quiet shush followed by a rub of the top of his head left him bewildered by her actions. Is she hiding something from him? What happened to Elizabeth? What happened to everything? How is everyone so quickly back on track with life after nearly all of mankind had been wiped out by the virus? Why was everything build as if nothing had ever happened? Was that the whole point? To forget? He couldn’t forget, not when he lived it, not when everyone lived it! He was frustrated, pushing his plate of toast aside that had eventually lost good temperature, and held his head in his hands. If she passed and he’s in a state of shock, she damn well better--

A scar. ...Stitches? Several of them across his left temple. It was swollen, as if it were recent, but not fresh, not ready to be fully healed. Had he been in an accident? He had terrible situations with that induced coma, and didn’t really come back from it one hundred percent, he felt. Perhaps the government was still trying to hide everything from him. Perhaps they had shipped him off somewhere more official, provided a cure to the world, but wanted to cover it all up and performed some sort of...under-the-table lobotomy on him. Of course that would all make sense. He wasn’t supposed to believe any of this happened. But that doesn’t explain what happened to Elizabeth! Was she...compromised for being involved with him? Oh god, what if they...?

His breath wavered unsteadily as his heart began to pound, a panic attack slowly coming to the surface. What was a life where everything was a lie? A dream...? “Ciel, honey, take a deep breath...then take your medicine.” His mother called upon his slight emergency as she grabbed a prescription bottle from the overhead cabinet and fished out two pills. She pried open his shaking hand and placed them gently in his palm. “I’m so sorry I didn’t wake you earlier. You’re behind now. We have to do a better job of staying on top of your doses, yeah?”

...’Get your fix’.

......’We have a long way to go.’

What happens to your perception of reality when you’re capable of living two different, two very real worlds and can’t wake up from either?

#standalone #apocalypse verse #what if #drabbles

[animeyanderelover]

For some reason it seems like there is a limit of words for requests so this was requested privately by @theodora3022 Please enjoy! Went for Charles with this since he’s one of my favs.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, manipulation, blackmailing, bribing

🤺☕️Charles had known the s/o since they were young even before he had started working as the queen’s personal butler. They had been friends for years and at the beginning Charles never thought more about it. But sadly time separated both of them for a few years were he was busily training and working on finishing Weston College and the s/o was forced to spend more time in the palace where she was teached everything the granddaughter of the queen should know. But even during this time Charles and her kept in contact through letters, keeping their tight bond.

🤺☕️It was years later when Charles saw her again. He had been recently hired as one of the queen’s personal butler what was also thanks to the s/o who had talked with the queen, insisting that Charles was more than fitting for this role and of course the queen wasn’t able to say no to her precious granddaughter. He was of course excited to see his old friend again and had already been imagining how much she might have changed, but his jaw nearly dropped when he saw the s/o again.

🤺☕️You had blossomed into a beautiful young woman and felt overjoyed to see your friend after such a long time again, needing to admit that he had gotten quite handsome, but your heart already belonged to someone else. Charles was speechless when he saw you, feeling his cheeks heat up and his heart starting to pick up it’s pace. Wh-what was this feeling?

🤺☕️The next few months the feeling didn’t disappear, much more on the contrary, it got even stronger. Both of you spend a lot of time together, catching up on old and new times and Charles did more than just enjoy it whenever you were near him. He loved it when you complimented him about how he had grown into a young and handsome man and when you had this shocked and admiring expression on your face whenever he showed his talent with the sword. By now he had discovered that he had fallen in love with his childhood friend and in his eyes this seemed to be destiny. He was absolutely convinced that you were perfect for him and he was perfect for you, after all both of you had known each other for years. And he also assumed that you liked him too. You spent time with him whenever you were in the palace and both of you told each other everything. That must mean something, right?

🤺☕️It was probably due to his delusions that he never really cared what you did when you weren’t in the palace. But one day you came to him with the biggest smile on your face that Charles had ever seen. He was a bit confused. Why so happy? That’s when you told him with a huge blush on your face a secret you had kept from him for some time now. You were in love with Ciel Phantomhive and recently you had tried to break of the engagement between him and Lizzy and it looked like you had succeeded with it. You knew that it was wrong to steal someone’s fiancé, but it was true love!! You wouldn’t be able to find this love you had for Ciel in any other person again!!

🤺☕️You didn’t notice how Charles facial expression dropped for a short moment and was replaced by a angry twisted look. But he was quick to overplay it with his normal look. But sometimes he couldn’t help, but let his eyebrows twitch as you continued to rave about Ciel. He lost his patience shortly after and quickly excused himself, he couldn’t stand to hear you talking about this guy one second longer. He ran into the next best training room he could find and started throwing a fit in there, cutting everything with his sword that he could find and at the end he was kneeling on the ground, heavily breathing and having an almost insane look in his eyes. So you were in love with this Phantomhive brat?! You wanted to get betrothed to him?! No way that he would let this happen!!!

🤺☕️The next few weeks were spent with Charles trying to find a way to prevent the engagement being broken off between Ciel and Elizabeth and it was easy for Charles to find out certain ways to at least make this whole thing last a bit longer so he would have time to think of other ways. He was quick to notice about how much the Midford’s cared for Elizabeth and the only thing that was needed were some comments about him that it was a shame that the family would just give up on their little one’s happiness like this. This especially sparked a flame in Elizabeth’s mother and her brother and shortly after there was a conflict between you and the family since they refused to break the engagement off. Of course you turned towards your grandmother, hoping that she would help, but Charles had already done some work on her too. He had gained the queen’s trust very quickly and he had let some comments slip about how cruel it was to take someone’s else fiancé away. That was such a discourteous behavior, especially for the granddaughter of the queen. You were probably a bit too spoiled? This had unsettled the queen and she refused to help you, what left you completely enraged. You were the queen’s granddaughter, for goddess sake!!

🤺☕️Now Charles had won a lot of time and the next step needed to be done as fast as possible. He needed to somehow dirty the image of the queen’s guard dog a bit. If he could do this then there was no way the queen would ever allow you to get betrothed to this boy. He knew that this would mean a lot of hard work, but he didn’t care. Because of this boy you had lost sight of who you were really meant to be with. HIM!! This Ciel would keep you away from him, your true happiness. Charles was truly convinced that there would be no one who was more perfect for you than him, the man you had known since your earliest years of life. Even if it meant bribing and blackmailing other people, he would do it. The queen was already, most likely thanks to him, suspicious of the boy and only one false accusation would be enough to assure that she would never allow her beloved granddaughter to marry Ciel. He knew that you would most likely have an emotional breakdown as soon as you would be forbidden to be engaged to this boy, but Charles would help you then. He would embrace you and comfort you and he would make sure to help you realize that you were never meant to be with Ciel, but with him!

#yandere black butler #yandere kuroshitsuji #yandere charles grey #yandere charles