#- it all. at this point im just complaining about good problems but it’s just tedious + obnoxious + i’m impatient!!!!

[boyobjectifier]

BEING A WRITER IS SO FUN I LOVE IT SO MUCH (DEROGATORY) ૮꒰˵• ﻌ •˵꒱ა

#i make everything i write so much longer than it needs to be but i know it’s a good thing #especially because i’m just complaining rn because i’m plotting out the rest of this novella and the SEX SCENE IS SO FUCKING LONGGGGGGGGGGGG #i already filled up a page of bullet points and i’m only 1/4 of the way through what i have planned for the rest of #- it all. at this point im just complaining about good problems but it’s just tedious + obnoxious + i’m impatient!!!! #h.txt #~writer struggles~ or whatever #also tell me you’re proud of me i’m on (handwritten) page 29 of my first novella 🥺

[bananaman-mp3]

six

theres a security search the next day - happens once or twice a year, this time its the third-, and a royal servant red shows up with the officers, and addresses mare.

okay- shes been summoned to summerton- a thing that apparently Never Happens To Reds, but apparently its not because of the thing that happened yesterday? (x) doubt.jpeg. all of her family silently says goodby in their own way each- do they really think theyll kill her??? is that how normal this is?? i shouldnt even be surprised at this point the reds just live in a fucked up society (insert joker memes here). she whispers i love you to them- goddamnit stop.

they take her and she looks at kilorns house as they leave. she remembers farley was expecting her payment today and shell be disappointed.

they take her away in a transport and past the hall and officers with no protests, despite the mentions of travelers being checked all over. mare attributes this to the servant lady being well known.

she -ann walsh, now- ever so helpfully, tells mare shes from the stilts like her and knew tramy and bree- whos mentioned to have been a heartbreaker? -and tells her shes going to work here, telling her as if she knew what this is about.

mare assumes it was cals doing, he pulled some strings and got her a job. if this is true consider me an official cal simp™

mare feels incredibly relieved abt it, even considers she could ask cal to do the same for kilorn!

now walsh takes her down to a dark tunnel, that leads to the hall of the sun. when mare asks, she just responde that she serves the king now.

things are kinda busy today, lady walsh says, more than ever before. mare mentions shes seen more silvers going upriver than ever even for that time of the year. she asks whats going on, and walsh tells her it Elect The New Queen Day for the first time in 20 years. wooooooow original. the “daughters of the high houses” aka a bunch of silver girls are gonna compete for throne. and by compete im guessing theyre gonna stand and look pretty and the one whos best at it gets the spot. i can already see where this is going and not just because i read the back summary of this book. i just hope they execute it well enough that its not tedious to read through.

oh my fucking god the next line is already mare roasting the concept of choosing a queen: “So, what, they do a spin, say a few words, bat their eyelashes?” mare i love you so much girl. i know i underestimated you when i began reading but you are shaping up to be a good character.

lady walsh is weirdly mysterious abt it, its some “youll see for yourself” type’ deal. mare joins the other servants, but lady walsh doesnt, -which makes her nervous- into the spiral garden, where the silver queenies are.

the spiral gardens are described as resembling the arena back home, which makes mare uncomfortable. her powers seem to be on the verge bc of it even if she doesnt know it yet. she works, helping the cooks and cleaning.

queenstrial starts.

a bunch of silver families enter, they all wear different colors to differentiate themselves i suppose. one of the silvers she recognizes as samson merandus, a whisper (mind reader) from the arena fight.

mare is called to serve on a table of a silver family and she overhears a conversation where she absolutely destroys a character we are just introduced: “I assume he is the one unfortunate enough to be called Ptolemus.” and she is RIGHT. anyway the silvers complain abt having to wait for the royals to show up. just abt the kind of whining rich ppl would do. and do irl too.

mare points out the obvious what kinda problems would the high class have with royalty? but she cant eavesdrop, bc thats not allowed and bc a sound announces that things are about to happen. mare says its like the beginning of the first friday feats and somthn tells me that it is, kind of. lets see. if this ceremony is abt girls slaughtering each other this might be interesting.

the king enters, and mare remarks how he is fatter than in the coins. hm. she point out how he wears his victories proudly despite not being the one who fights. his name is tiberias calore the sixth, king of norta. the queen is mentioned to be kin with samsons house. her names elara, the king mentions. oh yena he gives a whole introductory speech after someone screams about wanting to end the scarlet guard.

they introduce prince maven of house calore and merandus son of the queen? thats a mouthful. the other one, crown prince of house calore and jacos, son of queen coriane. hes the heir of norta. tiberias the seventh bc they licheraly cant come up with a different name apparently WAIT HOLD UP ITS CAL???? HUH?????????

#SHOOKETH #im really happy but also… not… #i cant believe i fell face first into potentially liking the arranged marriage but they actually fall in love trope #bc thats what this is gonna be right? #wow #red queen first read

[queenlua]

hey, i started following you recently and ur bio says ur a hacker? any tips on where to start? hacking seems like a v cool/fun way to learn more abt coding and cybersecurity/infrastructure and i'd like to explore it but there's so much on the internet and like, i'm not trying to get into anything illegal. thanks!

huh, an interesting question, ty!

i can give more tailored advice if you hit me up on chat with more specifics on your background/interests.

given what you've written here, though, i'll just assume you don't have any immediate professional aspirations (e.g. you just want to learn some things, and you aren't necessarily trying to get A Cyber Security Job TM within the next three months or w/e), and that you don't know much about any specific programming/computering domain yet.

(stuff under cut because long)

first i'd probably just try to pick some interesting problem that you think you can solve with tech. this doesn't need to be a "hacking" project at first; i was just messing around with computers for ages before i did anything involving security/exploitation.

if you don't already know how to program, you should ideally pick a problem you can solve via programming. for instance: i learned a lot back in the 2000s, when play-by-post forum RPGs were in vogue.  see, i'd already been messing around, building my own personal sites, first just with HTML & CSS, and later on with Javascript and PHP.   and i knew the forum software everyone used (InvisionPowerBoard) was written in PHP.  so when one of the admins at my RPG complained that they'd like the ability to set multiple profile pictures, i was like, "hey i'm good at programming, want me to create a mod to do that," and then i just... did. so then they asked me to program more features, and i got all the sexy nerd cred for being Forum Mod Queen, and it was a good time, i learned a lot.

(i also got to be the person who was frantically IMed at 2am because wtf the forum is down and there's an inscrutable error, what do??? basically sysadmining! also, much less sexy! still, i learned a lot!)

the key thing is that it's gotta be a problem that's interesting to you: as much as i love making dorky sites in PHP, half the fun was seeing other people using my stuff, and i think the era of forum-based RPGs has passed. but maybe you can apply some programming talents to something that you are interested in—maybe you want to make a silly Chrome extension to make people laugh, a la Cloud to Butt, or maybe you'd like to make a program that converts pixel art into cross-stitching patterns, maybe you want to just make a cool adventure game on those annoying graphing calculators they make you use in class, or make a script for some online game you play, or make something silly with Arduino (i once made a trash can that rolled toward me when i clapped my hands; it was fun, and way easier than you'd think!), whatever.

i know a lot of hacker-types who got their start doing ROM hacking for video games—replacing the character art or animations or whatever in old NES games. that's probably more relevant than the PHP websites, at least, and is probably a solid place to get started; in my experience those communities tend to be reasonably friendly to questions. pick a small thing you want to do & ask how to do it.

also, a somewhat unconventional path, but—once i knew how to program a bit of Python, i started doing goofy junk, like, "hey can i implemented NamedTuple from scratch,” which tends to lead to Python metaprogramming, which leads to surprising shit like "oh, stack frames are literally just Python objects and you can manually edit them in the interpreter to do deliberately horrendous/silly things, my god this language allows too much reflection and i'm having too much fun"... since Python is a lot of folks' first language these days, i thought i'd point that out, since i think this is a pretty accessible start to thinking about How Programs Actually Work under the hood. allison kaptur has some specific recommendations on how to poke around, if you wanna go that route.

it's reasonably likely you'll end up doing something "hackery" in the natural course of just working on stuff. for instance, while i was working on the IPB forum software mods, i became distressed to learn that everyone was using an INSECURE version of the software! no one was patching their shit!! i yelled at the admins about it, and they were like "well we haven't been hacked yet so it's not a problem," so i uh, decided to demonstrate a proof of concept? i downloaded some sketchy perl script, kicked it until it worked, logged in as the admins, and shitposted a bit before i logged out, y'know, to prove my point.

(they responded by banning me for two weeks, and did not patch their software. which, y'know, rip to them; they got hacked by an unrelated Turkish group two months later, and those dudes just straight-up deleted the whole website. i was a merciful god by comparison!)

anyway, even though downloading a perl script and just pointing it at a website isn't really "hacking" (it's the literal definition of script kiddie, heh)—the point is i was just experimenting a lot and trying a lot of stuff, which meant i was getting comfortable with thinking of software as not just some immutable relic, but something you can touch and prod in unexpected ways.

this dovetails into the next thing, which is like, just learn a lot of stuff. a boring conventional computer science degree will teach you a lot (provided you take it seriously and actually try to learn shit); alternatively, just taking the same classes as a boring conventional computer science degree, via edX or whatever free online thingy, will also teach you a lot. ("contributing to open source" also teaches you a lot but... hngh... is a whole can of worms; send a follow-up ask if you want that rant.)

here's where i should note that "hacking" is an impossibly broad category: the kind of person who knows how to fuck with website authentication tokens is very different than someone who writes a fuzzer, who is often quite different than someone who looks at the bug a fuzzer produces and actually writes a program that can exploit that bug... so what you focus on depends on what you're interested in. i imagine classes with names like "compilers," "operating systems," and "networking" will teach you a lot. but, like, idk, all knowledge is god-breathed and good for teaching. hell, i hear some universities these days have actual computer security classes? that's probably a good thing to look at, just to get a sense of what's out there, if you already know how to program.

also be comfortable with not knowing everything, but also, learn as you go. the bulk of my security knowledge came when i got kinda airdropped into a work team that basically hired me entirely on "potential" (lmao), and uh, prior to joining i only had the faintest idea what a hypervisor was? or the whole protection ring concept? or ioctls or sandboxing or threat models or, fuck, anything? i mostly just pestered people with like 800 questions and slowly built up a knowledge base, and remember being surprised & delighted when i went to a security conference a year later and could follow most of the talks, and when i wound up at a bar with a guy on the xbox security team and we compared our security models a bunch, and so on.  there wasn't a magic moment when i "got it", i was just like, "okay huh this dude says he found a ring-0 exploit... what does that mean... okay i think i got that... why is that a big deal though... better ask somebody.." (also: reading an occasional dead tree book is a good idea. i owe my firstborn to Robert Love's Linux Kernel Development, as outdated as it is, and also O'Reilly's kookaburra book gave me a great overview of web programming back in the day, etc.  you can learn a lot by just clicking around random blogs, but you’ll often end up with a lot of random little facts and no good mental scaffolding for holding it together; often, a decent book will give you that scaffolding.)

(also, it's pretty useful if you can find a knowledgable someone to pepper with random questions as you go. finding someone who will actively mentor you is tricky, but most working computery folks are happy to tell you things like "what you're doing is actually impossible, here's why," or "here's a tutorial someone told me was good for learning how to write a linux kernel module," or "here's my vague understanding of this concept you know nothing about," or "here's how you automate something to click on a link on a webpage," which tends to be handier than just google on its own.)

if you're reading this and you're like "ok cool but where's the part where i'm handed a computer and i gotta break in while going all hacker typer”—that's not the bulk of the work, alas! like, for sure, we do have fun pranking each other by trying dumb ways of stealing each other's passwords or whatever (once i stuck a keylogger in a dude's keyboard, fun times). but a lot of my security jobs have involved stuff like, "stare at this disassembly a long fuckin' time to figure out how the program pointer got all fucked up," or, "write a fuzzer that feeds a lot of randomized input to some C++ program, watch the program crash because C++ is a horrible language for writing software, go fix all the bugs," or "think Really Hard TM about all the settings and doohickeys this OS/GPU/whatever has, think about all the awful things someone could do with it, threat model and sandbox accordingly." occasionally i have done cool proof-of-concept hacks but honestly writing exploits can kinda be tedious, lol, so like, i'm only doing that if it's the only way i can get people to believe that Yes This Is Actually A Problem, Fix Your Code

"lua that's cool and all but i wanted, like, actual links and recommendations and stuff" okay, fair. here's some ideas:

microcorruption: very fun embedded security CTF; teaches you everything you need to know as you're doing it.

cryptopals crypto challenges: very fun little programming exercises that teach you a lot of fundamental cryptography concepts as you're going along! you can do these even as a bit of a n00b; i did them in Python for the lulz

the binary bomb lab is hilariously copied by, like, so many CS programs, lol, but for good reason. it's accessible and fun and is the first time most people get to feel like a real hacker! (requires you know a bit of C beforehand)

ctftime is a good way to see when new CTFs ("capture the flag"s; security-focused competitions) are coming up. or, sometimes CTFs post their source code, so you can continue trying them after the CTF is over. i liked Stripe's CTFs when they were going, because they focused on "web stuff", and "web stuff" was all i really knew at the time. if you're more interested in staring at disassembly, there's CTFs focused on that sort of thing too.

azeria has good ARM assembly & exploitation tutorials

also, like, lots of good talks out there; just watching defcon/cansecwest/etc talks until something piques your interest is very fun. i'd die on a battlefield for any of Christopher Domas's talks, but he assumes a lot of specific x86/OS knowledge, lol, so maybe don’t start with that. oh, Julia Evans's blog is honestly probably pretty good for just learning a lot of stuff and really beginner-friendly?

oh and wrt legality... idk, i haven't addressed it here since it hasn't come up in my own work much, tbh. if you're just getting started you're kind of unlikely to Break The Law without, y'know, realizing maybe you're doing something a bit gray-area? and you can cross that bridge when you come to it? Real Hacking TM is way more of a pain-in-the-ass than doing CTFs and such, and you'll learn way more with the latter, so who cares lol just do the fun thing

[mci-writing]

hey, do you know cuter-than-a-corgi-butt? well, you see, im corey lewis, the one who kept requesting yan!shinso from her. do you have any idea what happened to her? she deleted her account, is all the information i currently can get, i haven't been able to check up on her lately, i've been too busy with college. if you have any information, please tell me. im worried about her and i miss her. all that anon she got makes me want to cry; nobody fucking deserves that guys, stop it. please.

(Sorry to any and all who get tagged out of nowhere. It's just a small writing rant on the woes of being a fanfic writer, soooo)

So, after talking to a few people, I found out that the anon hate got so bad that they were going to other blogs and saying she was writing smut for minors 🙄. I've been warily avoiding publicly talking about all the recent crap fandom writers have been getting, but I have to come out about it some time.

So, we all know about how Sav was getting crap because someone narrowly decided to try to make it out that she was talking shit about a set of fic writers that are all close (very popular ones might I add) and I'm going to just go ahead and come out and say that it was me talking about them, but not in the way you may think. @savnofilter has constantly been worried about @lady-bakuhoe @katsukisprincess and @burnedbyshoto and the constant ordeal of people coming to them for clout. If anything, she was just voicing her concerns for them and I was the one mainly complaining about the fandom only appreciating characters and concepts for a certain amount of time (to the point where other people who don't write anything that fits those guidelines are unable to get their work out there). The only reason Sav received hate for it was because everything was practically spun out of context and it's Sav's discord server. She then proceeded to take it and then tried talking things out with certain people so that there was no misunderstanding.

With Cuter-than-a-corgy-butt, she was new to writing smut and just wanted to get her work out there. She, like any other person just starting out, used tags she felt were appropriate to get her stuff out there. I'll admit, I barely knew her. I knew of her content and her blog, but other than that, I never really interacted with her. I did see her name in passing with people receiving terrible anon hate, but I had wrongly assumed things had simmered down only to find out today that she deleted her blog due to all of the anon harassment she received. It got so bad that anons were going to other people's blogs and saying she wrote smut for minors when she was aging the characters up. No one's even been able to get in contact with her and all we can really do is hope that she's feeling better, hope that she's fine.

Spice has been receiving similar treatment about tags to the point where there are times she's really discouraged to even continue with certain ideas.

I'm sorry that this answer is becoming what it is (and this is my second time going off in the fanfiction reader part of the community), but it needs to be said. WE WRITE THIS STUFF FOR FREE OUT OF OUR SPARE TIME FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT. INSTEAD OF SHITTING ON WRITERS FOR DUMB SHIT, HOW ABOUT YOU: FILTER YOUR TAGS, UNFOLLOW CERTAIN ACCOUNTS, BLOCK CERTAIN ACCOUNTS, OR REBLOG THE CONTENT YOU ACTUALLY ENJOY SO THAT TUMBLR CAN APPEASE YOUR TASTES BY PRESENTING SAID THINGS TO YOU. Yes, it's a tedious thing to do, but most of people's issues with this site would be fixed if you did all of that. It's bad enough that we have terrible like to reblog ratios in comparison to other parts of fandoms and quite a couple of us writers have left because of shit like this (i.e Coco and Cho and Corgy). The least you can do is make things easier for us is supporting the content creators you enjoy by reblogging, sending in nice messages to our inboxes or private messages, liking the posts you enjoy, or just spouting off about one of your favorite fics. 

And one more thing because this is also a problem within the fandom: Just bc a set of writers appear to have beef with one another or some form of an issue doesn't mean you need to be a "White Knight" and take it upon yourself to deal with the issue by sending anon hate. Like, if you're gonna send hate regardless, do it off anon, you pusillanimous. Either way, 9 times out of 10, you have no idea what the situation between them is. Even if one person tells you to go crap on the other, have common sense and don't. The internet is dangerous and crappy and toxic enough without your extra two cents. If you want to tell a creator you saw someone talking about them in what you may assume is ill-manner, don't do it where everyone and their mother, brother, and sister can see. There are private messages for a reason.

And last, but certainly not least, send your favorite content creators the love and appreciation they deserve. Tell them what you like about them, ask them about their day, send them numerous hearts in their inbox, something! It means a lot more than you think.

Writers to send love to from off the top of my head (more may be added later): @savnofilter @bxkulani @gottalovegrammar

@izukumidoriydamn @lady-bakuhoe @burnedbyshoto @katsukisprincess @sadistik

@sparkexplosive @trashy-persons-stuff @strawberryandspiceandchocolate

@wonderwomanfantasy @monst @humanitysfandomhoe @tooloudarts @lord-explosion-baku @disasteren @kbakugouwu

You bitches are all bitching (in the good way😤) and don't let anyone tell you otherwise 💗💗💗

#mci answers asks #writer woes #mci rambles #mci rants #writer rants #fandom disagreements #fandom discourse #bnha #mha #bnha x reader #mha x reader #mha x y/n #mha x you #mha x oc #bnha x oc #bnha x y/n #bnha x you

[mymanskabu]

Kabu One-Shot:

A Kiss in Ten Seconds

Anonie requested: ❝Idk if I can req anything for the holidays or if it's too late but, just in case. Can you do something for Kabu finding out his champion!s/o will be too busy on New Years Eve and New Years Day bc of all the events that are going on? Then how would he react, when people are literally doing the 10 second count down right before midnight and he sees his s/o burst into the room/wherever he is, panting, out of breath, looking for him just so they could be there to kiss him when the countdown's over?❞

× IM UPLOADING THIS AT 11:59PM Or at least that's the time it is for me as I post this! I know its 2020 already for many of you! I wish you guys a good New Years!

× sorry some of y'alls requests will have taken a year to get done. Please don't unfollow, I am a hard-working person with one brain cell.

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

No one told you just how tedious and time consuming being a Champion would be. No wonder the former one appears much less stressed, the poor guy barely had time for his family on this schedule. You were constantly on the move and everyone wanted to talk to you. Leon came around to check on you after you had sent him a text saying, "Help, why are they coming for my life, I have a shit to do."

"Your schedule is very full," He said, looking at you apologetically. "There should be a warning before people try to become Champion, this is a workload that would surely scare off a lot of trainers."

"I don't even have time for my hobbies!" You flip the page to your schedule and half of next month was already full. "I'm lucky enough to manage a call to my mom and one of the only times I see Kabu is when I am going home in the middle of the night." You were surprised the man hasn't decided to leave you. You would completely understand if he couldn't handle being with someone so busy.

"I was undefeated for a very long time," Leon starts explaining. "Your schedule is much fuller than mine was because you beat someone that no one else could for many years. Even those older than me and with perhaps more experience couldn't defeat me."

"You're telling me your schedule wasn't this hectic?" You stared down at the calendar, realizing that talking to Leon was going to get cut short anytime soon.

"It was hectic definitely. Not like this." Leon gave you a comforting pat on your shoulder. "The workload will lessen later on, not sure by how much but you can only repeat a story for so long before people get bored. Then you have to worry about people trying to force a story to happen. At least you have off time when the Gym Challenge is not at large."

"I'm going to lose to the next challenger on purpose," You said. It got a chuckle out of Leon who raised a brow at you, questioning the honesty of your statement. "Or not." You sighed. "Too many benefits outweighing the negatives right now. Well, I'm happy you're able to have more time for other projects Leon!"

"Thank you... Champion."

You were getting many challengers nowadays. People who couldn't defeat Leon come back thinking they can defeat you, plenty of Challengers coming for your title, and new ones in the making. You had a lot of paperwork as well, surprisingly enough. A lot of interviews, so many damn interviews, and your privacy? Almost completely gone. You were grateful for having been with Kabu since before you even challenged the Gyms to attempt being Champion.

Unfortunately your relationship with him was outed rather quickly because of that though. Even if it was a secret, the ring on a specific finger would have also given you away. That was quite recent, it was his surprise for when you became Champion so now wedding planning is somewhere quite far in the schedule. Your management didn't consider it as important as you did, it's something you had to force into your schedule. They only care about managing your public image, personal problems don't rank high on their list of priorities when they're organizing your calendar.

Champions also have to be very involved with Galar and it's people. You had to understand the public opinion, the government opinion, and manage almost any incoming threat. That was terrifying, they sent you to anything just because you happen to be strongest around right now. You had to suck it up and protect the people, show them that their Champion can do probably anything.

You read over your schedule with Leon for a bit longer until you saw something in it that was irritating. "Leon. Why in the world do I have interviews for both New Years Eve and New Years. They can't take those days! I wanted to... I need to be..." You were fuming. You told them not to fill the holidays and they didn't for the past ones, but for some reason they filled those two dates.

"There isn't much you can do about that," He says. "You can try but I remember trying and they... if its urgent, its unlikely." Leon continued with saying that they probably gave you the prior holidays so that you didn't have room to completely complain about your management.

Your phone started ringing. You hesitated to pick up the phone knowing that it'll be someone to take you away for another interview, photoshoot, or fan meet. You didn't hate the people that wanted to meet you, your anger was mostly directed towards the people that were stuffing so much into your schedule. Leon was right though, they can't keep this up forever and hopefully later on it will get more tolerable.

"Are you alright?" His familiar voice caused your shoulders to ease up. You were crossing your arms on the table with your head laid on them. You had came home tired of socializing and still having to do some paperwork having to do with former Chairman Rose.

"Yes, I'm fine. I'm tired though, mentally tired to tell you the truth." You stretched your arms upwards then felt two arms wrap around your shoulders when you put them down. "Kabu, I can't be with you during New Years Eve or New Years. It says its urgent but I very much doubt these Talk Shows need me that badly."

You didn't hear anything from behind you for a long moment. He was most likely thinking, you were too, and depending on what he says, you might just consider the idea of letting him go. It hurt you to ponder upon such a thing, but there's other people out there that could give Kabu much more of their time.

"I understand," He finally said, "I'll open up the Stadium for those that need a warm place to be on those days and I will be thinking of you when the countdown starts."

"You don't have to be like that, you know? You don't have to understand, you can be mad at me, you can be frustrated at me, I won't... I won't blame you!" You got up from where you were sitting to face him. He held your hands and promptly shook his head in response.

"I'm not sure you knew this, love but you do not plan your schedule." He kisses your knuckles to comfort you. "If I am to be frustrated at anyone it will be whoever made you busy on those two days. Was there anything you could do about it?"

"I tried, but they just repeatedly tell me that it's an urgent thing I need to be at," You reply, a frustrated sigh escaping past your lips.

"You do what you have to, and think of me as I will think of you during the countdown." With a hand gently on the back of your neck he guides your mouth to his in a much needed relaxing kiss that made your body melt.

"Of course, you're right... you're right," You mumbled. Your eyes remained closed for a bit after the kiss before you were able to open them without feeling like they held sadness in them. "I love you, you know that?"

"I love you too."

Your stylist dressed you up nicely for the interviews, these events to celebrate a new Champion and a New Year. This is wrong, why does it feel like you were just rubbing it in everyone's face that you were now Champion? You were backstage waiting to be introduced, slouching in a nearby couch with your elbow on your thigh and your hand holding your chin. Finally you heard your name, you could see the crowd cheering on the screen, all anticipating your presence through the hall that all guests walk through.

Kabu opened the Stadium as he said he would, a lot more people came than he thought would. He had announced that it would be open to celebrate the New Year and there would be food and drinks. It wasn't going to be like that at first but you offered the funds and he couldn't say no. It was open for people and Pokemon alike and that brought his heart a pleasant feeling.

He missed you a lot though. He understood that you had things to do but he didn't realize just how attached he had grown to you for your lacking presence to impact him so much. His Stadium was playing the interview for everyone to see and the people that came; majority of them knew Kabu was engaged to the new Champion of Galar. He wondered if you were going to complete your end of the promise and think of him.

"Here's our new magnificent Champion, (Name)!" The cheers were loud, the "I love you's" came from all directions, and so did flowers. Roses, vibrant red roses that reminded you of Kabu. You sat down, a big smile on your face that only managed to be genuine knowing Kabu would see it. "How are you on this beautiful night, Champ?" The interviewer asked.

"I'm doing great, thank you! I actually have somethin' to say real quick, is that alright?" The interviewer furrowed his brows and pointed towards the camera you should speak to.

"Let's hear what (Name) needs to say folks! I wonder what it is! Sounds mysterious!"

"Perhaps it would be mysterious if paparazzi didn't exist," You responded. "I want to say I'm thinking about you, I'll see you soon!"

"Would my guess be wrong if I say that message was for your to-be husband and Fire Type Gym Leader Kabu!?" The interviewer raises your hand, the one that had the ring. "How is the wedding planning going anyway? Any progress?"

"Its somewhere in my schedule, we have ideas we hope to bring to life." The answer was simple and clearly not to the interviewers' taste. They had to remain unaffected though and continued smiling.

"We have a few fan questions we would like you to answer! First one being, would you date a fan?!"

"Absolutely not. I'm engaged, are you people not getting the memo?" You said this sarcastically, but with a tone of seriousness. It got you a laugh from the audience and you laughed along with them as truthfully as you could. "Not to be inappropriate or anything but I think— no. I know I'll be with Kabu for the rest of my life."

Kabu was almost as red as Gym outfit shirt, hearing the "Aww" from both the crowd in the Stadium and the ones where you were. In all honesty though, he would have said the exact same thing about you.

"A curious fan has asked: Do you sing in the shower?" You didn't think for long and answered it with a brief nod.

"I do sing in the shower, Kabu says it sounds good but I think he may just be losing hearing." Once again, the crowd laughed. "Who knows though, only he has ever heard me sing and no, I'm not singing!"

"You and Kabu live together as you've implied multiple times, has there been any mishaps in the kitchen by one of you?" You pondered on this question for a few seconds.

"Not yet, Kabu is a pretty good cook and surprisingly good baker!" You tried to think of an incident once again but nothing came to mind as of now.

"Have you used the 'Is your Dad a baker' pick up line on him yet?" You chuckled at the question and so did the crowd. You covered half your face as you nodded, confirming that you have used a pick up line on him. "I didn't expect that! How'd that go?"

"He still has no idea what I meant by the line and I suppose now is a good time to get it out in the open." It took you a moment or two to compose yourself. "When I said you had a nice set of buns, I was talking about your butt, Kabu!"

He was sitting in the middle of his Stadium, on the ground and when you said that, he fell back laughing much more than he usually would allow himself to in front of a crowd. He should have known that's what you meant then, all he wished to say in response was that he felt the same way. He knows you would have playfully hit him on the arm or something and thank him for the compliment.

A few more questions passed until it was getting close to the countdown. There was an ad break a few minutes before it started. You didn't want to be here, your heart was telling you to leave, take a flying taxi, find Kabu, find home, and be where you know you want to be. You slowly got up from the waiting area, ignoring the calling security, interviewer, and anyone else you just left.

Ten.

You ran, forgetting you had a flying taxi even though you thought about it moments ago. You only had one thing on your mind and that was reaching Kabu before the countdown was over. You ran, your legs wanting to stop but you wouldn't allow it, your lungs trying to take in all the cold air, and the fancy shoes on your feet making it even more difficult. You stopped and took them off, hastily picking them up then running again. No rock on the ground was stopping you from being where you wanted to be tonight.

Nine.

When the show came back on, you weren't there and he was confused. Apparently you had left abruptly, this caused him to worry and tried getting a hold of you through a text then called you.

Eight.

Kabu didn't know you ran off, leaving your items behind with only one goal in mind. His destination was within your line of sight and it made you push forward much faster, pushing your legs harder to make it before the time ran out.

Seven.

He wanted to be able to at least to see you through the screen as the countdown started. Where did you go? Why did you leave? Were you even okay? Now all he could think about was your well-being.

Six.

You were jogging past the hair salon, the many small stores on the sides, some which had people. People watching the Champion run to the elevator that would take you to Motostoke Stadium.

Five.

No one asked questions as you walked in, your legs almost wanting to give in. You continued, waving off others that wanted to help you walk towards the doors to the Stadium itself.

Four.

You stood in the tunnel for a couple of seconds, your eyes searching for Kabu. He who was watching the screen, hoping for your appearance or any news on your location.

Three.

The crowd spotted you first, the loud cheers startling Kabu as his eyes met yours when he turned his head in your direction. He never felt more relieved to see you there, why you had disappeared made much more sense to a lot people now that you were here.

Two.

With all the strength you could muster in your legs, you practically limped forward. Absolutely tired by the run and feeling like a whole idiot for not using a taxi when you could have at any point on your way here. He saw you panting, no shoes on your feet, you looked like quite the beautiful mess.

One.

No words are exchanged as you throw your arms around his neck, holding him in a tight embrace before your lips passionately meet his. He was slightly taken aback by the roughness of the kiss, you had his body right against yours, and a hand clutching the hair on the back his head. How long had it been since he has had something like this? He had forgotten how amazing this physical contact could feel and experiencing this made him feel as if it was a first kiss. Then the clock strikes twelve, your hold on him loosens, and its just you and him.

Your forehead was on his, you two were sharing breaths because of how long and sudden it was. Embarrassment hit you randomly when you realized there was a crowd, you left an interview, and Kabu was probably staring at you while you didn't dare open your eyes. Not until you could look at him and say something that didn't sound like you didn't know how to form sentences.

You could hear the crowd now, the whistling, the clapping, the stomping of their feet, any form of cheering the could make they did it.

"Another year of you and me," He said. "I am looking forward to another one." He gave you one chaste kiss for his own pleasure and you smiled.

"I look forward to another one too."

#request #happy new year #!! #kabu swsh #swsh kabu #pokemon kabu #kabu #kabu is all i need lmao #kabu pokemon #pokemon sword and shield #pokemon shield #pokemon sword #pokemon #sword and shield #swsh #pokemon swsh #drabble #oneshot

[losingmyjustice]

@nurotoxin​​​ sent;

scraTCH THAT [ everything ( minus appeal ) ] + glados

Thoughts & Feelings

Send [ word ] + a character name for my muse to talk about that character.

"Unfortunate that I ended up running into her." beat. "Or rather, that she ended up approaching me. Because, clearly, the first thing you think of when seeing a stranger sitting alone trying to get some peace and quiet is how great of a test subject they'd be. Absolutely normal."

"Also, I'm quite annoyed by how persistent she is — clearly there are more cooperative people she can irritate with her tests, yet she still sees it necessary to bother me despite how I've opposed to it since the get-go."

"Frankly, I don't get it, how she can loathe me to bits yet still be the one initiating an interaction. Sounds rather self-sabotaging, if you ask me. I'd think both of us would profit from it if we'd avoid each other."

Send [ oops ] + a character name for my muse to blurt something about that character.

"If you think about it," he spoke, while not thinking much about it, let alone how offensive it might be. "to claim she's taller than me is ridiculous."

"Her, er, vessel had been assigned by the Stars upon her arrival, right? It's not ... bound with her, so to say. Meaning, should one put her into a tinier vessel similar to the ones you find in Craft-Punk, then she'd have a new, much smaller height than she initially did, while still being the same person. Therefore, her vessel being taller could be compared to someone wearing high heels, no? It's not her, physically, being taller." he’s just salty.

"— Should she argue about this, then just put her in a 2ft tall vessel and see if she still believes it's fair to judge height per the vessel she's in. I bet she'd hate that."

Send [ think ] + a character name to know my muse’s thoughts on that character.

You squint as she took her leave. Despite having her back turned, you're rather certain she's aware of the stare piercing her, though really it'd only be all the better if she is.

All she had said is for you to wait with no further explanation. Likely bringing something, you reckon. You did scoff that you'd leave immediately just to spite her, but both of you know that it won't come to such — it's difficult to find a quiet spot as is with all these celebrations, and you genuinely don't have the energy to bother today. So here you are, grumbling; What the hell is her problem?

If you'd only go by the 'tests' she offers, you'd think of her as a joke. You still do, but — aside from amusement, what's there for her to accomplish? Granted, she does gain some info here and there about Spirale, but apart from that? If that's it, she sure picked quite the horribly inconvenient way to approach the matter. Someone who'd seek actual results wouldn't do that. What's worse; that isn't it. If it'd be just a puzzle enthusiastic scientist wanna-be would be one thing, but only a glance on her attitude and you'd argue her to be worse than the imbecile Dimitri, for obvious reasons. So why? Is she studying people and their way of thinking solely to understand them? That'd barely make sense, considering how she gives no damn about humans to be this interested. Hell, you'd not be surprised if she'd replace her test subjects with these stupid turrets if she could, considering how she reacted when you tossed it the other day. So, what is it then? You can't fathom a potential goal she might be seeking that isn't ridiculously outlandish.

... Maybe she doesn't have a goal, you think. Perhaps she truly is driven by the concept of 'doing science' alone, like she had been programmed to do — and that's all she does, despite the fact that she isn't even where the task was given to her. Gathering information just for the sake of gathering information, with no slight interest on who it aids, or who it expenses. A pointless routine, pretty much. "Despicable," you find yourself muttering, seeing her return again from a distance. You can't imagine anyone living content and happy without having an aim they're striving for in life.

You'd know.

Send [ heart ] + a character name to know my muse’s true feelings for that character.

As much as I'd love to say he's holding a front or whatever, unfortunately, beneath the disrespect is just the same thing but bass-boosted. True, he did act on prejudices at first, but his assumptions had been more than confirmed to him by now, so really he'd call it horseshit if you were to speak to him about how he's got to be open-minded and etc.

However!! While he does have more respects for a snail than for GLaDOS, it might come to a surprise to you when I say he finds her much more tolerable than Dimitri! So hey, at least she got that going for her! Even if he'd never admit that. There are several reasons that go into this — for instance, the fact that she isn't love-struck & her actions (cough, life) not entirely centered around such do make talking to her less annoying. You could claim that she's love-stuck by science, I guess, but she doesnt whine about it. GLaDOS is also far less gullible, much more observant; while it was fortunate for Clive that Dimitri wasn't alike to her in that aspect, conversing with a fool that has only one thing in mind is hardly interesting, and at some point forward even the thrill of deceiving them was gone, more alike to a ludicrously boring routine. It hurts me to insult Allen like this but, yeah — speaking to someone who's less naive is, ultimately, less tedious.

Also uh, this is sad to say but, yknow, Clive keeping up an act around Dimitri at all times was draining — smiling while wanting to strangle someone is!! not a fun thing. Neither is acting like you're a fan of a work that had your parents killed. But, with GLaDOS, he doesn't have to pretend shit. To put it bluntly, it's a relief he can be the asshole he wants to be without repressing it. And, relief makes stuff more tolerable! For him.

There's definitely the comfort of 'im having a bad day and im about to make that everyones problem' that he was unable to do all these years but, hey, you didn't hear that from me.

Regarding testing, they're not always horribly annoying to him unlike he'd claim — especially the ones you could (almost) compare to puzzles; they do catch his interest, and there's always the satisfaction you get when you got it right. However, he'll always be awfully reluctant to do the tests despite how intriguing they might be, and should he end up doing it anyway — never express that delight. Maybe a smirk might slip, but should she point that out he'd make sure in one way or another for her to take that back, or reason said smirk to be something insulting against her — yknow, the usual. Clive wants to be as inconvenient as possible as a 'test subject', and, is doing a good job at that. While yeah, the tests can low-key be temporarily nice, you won't find him miss these should she finally leave him alone. There are a lot of things he's missing, but GLaDOS and her Tests will never be on the list, really.

Send [ body ] + a character name to know my muse’s body language around that character.

So, uh. we both know he's emotionally unstable, right. Talking about his Body Language when he's acting like that is,, difficult, since it depends highly on his mood swings and I'm not about to count them all,, we'll be here forever if I do that. All I can say is that he's surely tense & sensitive whilst it.

However!! I'll ramble a bit about his usual demeanour w/ GLaDOS when things are "fine", whatever that means when talking about Clive

If he's just 'kinda there', as in low-spirited yet still well enough to talk shit (which is the 'usual' in their interactions IG) you can absolutely expect him to intentionally sit 'wrong' yet comfortably — just, y'know, to express disdain even further. Usually, it'd mean he's rather comfortable around you, but in this case, it's frankly just a lack of care of what GLaDOS thinks of him. She already knows he's got issues smh why bother giving a good impression,, Guard isn't really up either, slacking far too much to be so — just this state of "meh." where he very well can complain about the situation at hand without leaving despite it. Uhh, what else — ah and he got his hat off, likely just cast aside somewhere. shrugs

If Clive is ACTUALLY spacing out, be it to the extent where he trails off and loses his line of thoughts like all 30 seconds, or even as far to where he doesn't respond at all — if he's standing, sitting, henceforth, one thing for sure his posture would be slumped, although seeing how it's usually a thing that happens gradually, he'd stop sitting so improper (aside from the slumped posture, of course) so there's that, at least. Guard is obviously thrown out of the roof in such things. Whilst sitting there's also this habit where he'd tip with his fingers on the palm of the other hand (imagine like playing on a piano) or instead have a fist resting in it (as if you're counting for rock paper scissors) while he's spacing out— I can imagine GLaDOS would have already picked up on that to tell when he's getting lost in thought again.

Obviously, he got better days than that, where he'd care to keep up the manners you'd expect from him — but rest assured if he has the energy to act normal, he'll also have the energy to leave should GLaDOS show up. So, the next best thing is where he's irked, which. Well, that's not all too fun either, but. He'd sit upright, arms crossed, perchance even legs crossed, rather tense, you get the idea—much less cooperative too, but what else is new.

#it’s friday and the house is burning [memes] #nothing left to say [ask reply] #nurotoxin #// hands u an essay

[survivor-ingary]

Episode 2 - "I DON'T WANT THE MYSTERY MOUSE-CA-TOOL BESTIE" - Ellie

At the tribal, Ping was voted out of the Pendragon Tribe nearly unamimously. Tribal immunity for this round is Pictionary.

I bet all these bitches know i voted for Keith and now they are going to come kill me in my sleep if i die i blame dylan

yass round 2 i either think im in the best position on this tribe or theyre all secretly coming for me thats all

Tribal went as well as I expected it to go. No major drama. It seems like Keith is in real trouble if we do go to tribal again though which would put me in a very tricky spot. For now, though, I will be trying my best in the upcoming challenge. The problem is, however, timezones and schedules. Jon is going to be our drawer, but he can only do it tonight or in the early afternoon tomorrow which I will not be there for. Additionally, Keith is asleep so we have no idea what his schedule is going to be so we basically had to schedule the challenge without him. And Nya could only do right before the deadline tomorrow which Jon cannot do. I hate this for us, truly. I just hope that Moth and I can rub our brain cells together for this one so that we can pull out a win. OR somehow the other tribes fail horribly. On the bright side, I am finally starting to catch up on Duolingo exercises. They're a lot easier than I thought, but it is still going to be tedious af to save up enough coins for some of the higher end products at the shop. As a final note, I am going to work with Nya in the long term as we promised each other to. Hopefully that actually works out. Time to actually be loyal and be a hero this time around. Need to try something different.

If we lose this challenge, I will be very upset. We went so hard on this challenge!!! I believe that we can at least get second place, but I don't know how crazy the other tribes are. So, let's see what goes on

Ayyyyy soooooooo looks like the four, Colin, me, Ava, and Brayden are officially in an alliance!? I’m really hyped to be working with everybody and already have sights on who should go if we have to go to tribal 👀 but like I’m gonna feel so bad if we go to tribal and I orchestrate a whole plan to take someone out I gotta do it when I’m not in my feels and the planets aren’t fucking with my emotions too heavy. But go alliance ! This means I’ll be able to stay safe until hopefully a merge and hopefully we can avoid a tribe swap till then which I get those vibe from it !! But I’ll be here to survive two more tribals just in case which is pretty rad. Other then that hopefully me offering to draw doesn’t end us up in the bottom and we can keep killing ! But anyways that is it as off know hopefully I have a lot more coins tomorrow morning and I get hit the hat shop bright and motherfucking early.

Just got asked to be apart of an alliance <33333 the besties in the group trust me which maybe ain't the right move but for now we gotta love the bonding. exciting!!!

YAY FOR ROUND 2! Okay, so I meet once again with the Hat Shop and... third times the charm! Except,,, the charm is getting nothing AGAIN lmao I'm not complaining though, still got that extra vote :P I stayed up at 1 AM for this challenge, and I honestly think our team popped off. Anastasia was guessing a ton, and Riley was amazing at drawing real quick! I have a relatively good feeling about our performance, so I hope I wake up to the news of our tribe being immune :D

so yesterday I set myself on a mission to get an alliance. I wanted Ava + Brayden + Toph + me as a majority alliance. it was our day off from tribal so I thought it was the perfect day to do it!! I talked to Brayden about it first because he's the person I feel the most comfortable with, and then after a lot of coordination and careful communication I was able to pull it together!! I think the most important thing when making alliances is making everyone feel like they're a big part in it. So I was careful to ask each person how they feel about the others, about the game, and made a point to say that I wanted to work with them specifically. Some may call that a little manipulative, but I wanna make sure that I'm an essential part of the alliance!! i need everyone to feel like they need/want me there.

all of this happening so soon into the game is a testament to how aggressive I'm playing this time around. I usually like to lay low and just rely solely on my social game in the start, but I'm trying this out to establish myself early on! I wanted to play the tribe leader and I think I'm doing that in a smart and subtle way!!

so yes now we have a 4 person majority alliance named "duolingo owl hate club" because fuck that guy. I think we're the 4 most active and present people on the tribe so it's only natural for us to work together, but I think it's definitely worth noting that I was the one that was pulling the strings here.

We just did the pictionary challenge, I have a good feeling about it!! Toph was an amazing artist, and if we win, all credit rightfully goes to him!! I think the guessers also did great of course, but like come on, the artist has to be the mvp. I'm really hoping we pull through!! I don't mind going to tribal, but I genuinely don't wanna vote anyone out yet. I'm fine just playing the game in a precautionary way. I know I'm in a great position if we do go to tribal, but it's always preferred that we don't go.

Everyone else on my tribe: doing the challenge and kicking ass

Me: I’m sleep

Riley (Tumblr has once again chosen violence so only the first 10 get banners 🥲)

I think our challenge went pretty well! My team were good guessers. Feeling like I've established some Integrity now. Hope it keeps me safe later!

Toph Soooooo we finished the challenge with 32 points and like wig !! I was a quick as drawer for 32pts expect when my internet lagged, but still ! I think we whooped some ass and if we do go to tribal I know it won’t be me going, thanks to Duolingo owl hate club but I’m also worried same could have and advantage because they seem pretty kean on learning a lot in like 3 hours and then tried to cover that statement to not seem so threatening but like babs s a huge threat too apparently they love Duolingo and know 5 laugnes ? This is from brayden but If so go babs ! That’s absolutely iconic for real Life but fucking scary in this game ! I gotta be buddy buddy with them so hopefully if they do have something it won’t be them going home first and it will be Ava. But I’m thinking we might get second place again unless someone is a fucking wizard at this.

Dennis hmm i think we did well enough in the challenge to not see tribal tomorrow but who knows i guess we shall find out tn

the way ellie was so on top of stuff yesterday only to oversleep the challenge makes me giggle maybe shes freaking out about it which makes me also giggle but i dont think its really a big deal

anastasia asked me to call yesterday and i was like sure lets talk but it is damn near impossible to hold a conversation with her idk i tried BUT she did tell me “yeah i just got off a call with ellie” im like i see. she says shes down to work with ellie but that quickly switched from ellie being ~experienced~ but good to know ellie is also playing hard. anastasia also mentioned that she talks to riley a fair amount who i still have yet to connect to well. but dat makes me think ellie is def talking to riley too miss debate team is definitely a talker. but good on her for the social game i guess

kenneth keeps being like haha we’re the same person and im like yeah👁 i bet we are👁

i just wanna win and not think about tribal just keep it slow and chill for now keep learnin my welsh i guess

Ava Second challenge was Pictionary and I had a ton of fun playing. The tea is: toph did a great job. He was pretty vocal about not being a great artist but really I think he did great. However, Babs was super inactive yesterday and ~too late~ said they were a great artist and should've been picked to draw. It was kind of like.... k babs thanks for the belated "help". They did do great guessing which scored a point in my book. Brayden was supposed to play but last minute logged off without saying anything so we did the challenge without him :/ sorta a bummer. Anyway the lack of participation from Sam is kind of popping off so we'll see where that leads them... Overall a fun game and fingers crossed we did well!

Moth I think we did okay at the challenge. Today I am dying from the heatwave so I’m not thinking too straight! Stay cool everyone

Ellie So yesterday Anastasia and I called for about an hour!!! I’d say we’re definitely way closer, she’s someone I really wanna work with although the idea of her and Brayden eventually being on the same tribe is kinda scary cause I know how close they are. Still she’s so fun to talk to and I just love her energy so much!

Pictionary challenge results: Jenkins Tribe wins with Penadragon second, Hatter Tribe has to go to tribal council on the following day.

Ava Well well well seems our bob ross, toph, didn't pull through (y'all think babs would've pulled it out for us or slept through our challenge like they said they almost did?) I can't wait for tribal. I'm in it for the drama. I'm hashtag voting Sam off - didn't even bother to be apart of our challenge and not too sure they've even been online for a full 24 hours. Weed out the weak.....

Anastasia

Brayden https://imgur.com/n60Lz0c

guys i dont know what to do someone help me out

Dennis i hope damn brayden gets the boot

Raffy Woo! We don't have to go to tribal again! We stan!

Ellie So I figured I’d go idol hunting today cause the shop was about to close and I just wanted to see what had been bought and what possible hats there were, I see that there’s a hat I have enough for that hasn’t been bought and I decide fuck it let’s get it

APPARENTLY ITS SOMETHING THAT IM NOT ALLOWED TO KNOW WHAT IT IS OR HOW TO USE IT YET???? THEY SAID ILL FIND OUT ABOUT IT LATER

I DONT WANT THE MYSTERY MOUSE-CA-TOOL BESTIE

Sam Well you see. I like all my tribe people. And I think we did real good on that music video! So, I think rather than voting anyone else off, I think I should just vote myself off if that is possible! Ahhh

Babs So sad to see Sam not only go but go through what they're going through :( same w Toph :( they all seem so lovely

Keith Not sure if i submitted a confession after the last tribal. But if I didnt here it is.

Happy I made it out of that tribal. I had raffy backing me with whom I played. Last time we played. We were at odds. We didnt work together but whats worse that we were against each other. It was either him or me goin out. Hopefully thats the past n we can work together. I jus need to keep things calm n show that Im not here itching to make big moves. So they dont feel threatened by me. N its easy cause right now. I havnt made that kind og bond with anyone on my tribe. To even think of such moves. Lets see what round two holds for me.

Colin so uh

we lost! :(

I was really bummed tbh. Like I thought we did well but circumstances with the challenge were just really unfortunate, from conflict about who wanted to be the artist to people disappearing the moment the challenge started, I think we did well despite all of that. Except we did kinda get stomped anyway. Oh well!! The game moves on. Tribal has to happen.

Initially I was gonna push for Babs, just because I feel like I don't wanna attach myself to them too early on. I've seen how much of a bitter player they can be, and lets just say I'm not the most loyal ally to have. however! 9 minutes after we lost, Ava announces to our alliance that she's voting Sam. I wasn't surprised, Sam has been the one not really pulling their weight. But I had some good connections with her!! we both did colorguard and shes so sweet and easy to talk to. I was really conflicted for a little bit, debating on whether or not to actually push for Babs. I think brayden sensed my hesitance but we both knew there was nothing really I could do to stop Sam from being the vote. At first tribal, the initial name always spreads like wildfire.

However, my mess was stopped abruptly by Sam asking to be voted out. welp!! okay then!! babs stays i guess!! i'm not too bothered. I'll never turn down an easy vote hehe.

Pretty sure there's a swap tonight. I'm kinda scared of that

uwu

Brayden

i almost forgot to upload this but dont worry i just remembered

Colin screams

Toph So we’re going to tribal in 20 and all I have to say right now is if there is a tribe swap after I’m gonna so scared but I ducking called I had a vibe and it was right that’s what is gonna win me this game trusting my intuition. I’m holding on now and gonna be the biggest comp beast next challenge in case I get fucked on this swap !!!! Or at least if it is a swap 🤔

Riley I don't know what this announcement's gonna be I'm worriedddd... Ginny said it probably means we're swapping teams but I don't wannaaaa I like our team.

Toph Sam self sacrificing made this the easiest vote ever and me being safe is a plus I guess 😎

#episodes

[walrusguy]

This game sucks. Castlevania 1 and 3 are great classic Nintendo games, but for Castlevania 2: Simon's Quest, the game designers obviously were not thinking straight. At first it seems like a pretty decent game, a little different from the first in the series but, that's okay. Zelda 2 was different from the first, Mario 2 was different, but they were all good. The first thing that's strikingly different is the fact that you have to go through towns, talk to people and buy stuff. I never really minded that, it makes it a little more like an adventure story and it's kinda like Zelda, so that's okay. But the first problem comes in when it changes from day to night. (A message box appears in-game: WHAT A HORRIBLE NIGHT TO HAVE A CURSE.) Why does this need to happen so often? Like, every five minutes? Why does it take so long? Nobody feels like sitting through this every time. How would you like it if you were playin' a game and then every five minutes I came over, and paused it, then counted ten tedious seconds, and then let you continue play the game? Now, I mean, why did they think that that would be a good idea and interrupt the game play, did they think it would be more realistic? I mean, in real life I don't have to stop in my tracks when the sun sets and a fuckin' box doesn't pop up in the air. I mean, this is one of the most annoying features in any game ever. What's the point? Yeah, the, I mean, the monsters are stronger at night and the stores are closed, but why's that necessary and why does the game have to stop? It's fuckin' retarded. And why do you have to die when you fall in the water? That's the stupidest thing I've ever seen. This guy can go all over fightin' hordes of evil monsters, but he can't even fuckin' swim? Sometimes I don't feel like goin' down the stairs just to get down to ground level, I mean, there's no reason I should have to do that when I can just take a shortcut and jump down. But, oops! I shouldn't do that, there might be water down there. Another thing that's really annoying about this game is the fact that you have to buy weapons and items. I mean, still, that's not uncommon, you know like I said: that's the same thing you have to do in many great games, like Zelda, but, lemme explain. Here you have to collect hearts, which count as money. I mean, that's kinda odd, because usually hearts count as life or energy, y'know, so that's kinda strange. But, y'know that's not the point. The point is that the items you need to buy are too fuckin' expensive, and the hearts don't add up enough. It takes too long to get enough of them to buy something, and it gets boring wandering around killing the same monsters over and over again just so you can buy a Flame Whip or somethin'. Speaking of Flame Whip, that's pretty weird itself, isn't it? I mean, they were really being creative with that one, the flame whip. Anyway, about the hearts: It takes too long to buy stuff, and, to add onto the problem, when you die, you lose all your hearts and you have to start all over again. I mean, doing this doesn't add to any of the games' difficulty or challenge, it just makes us have to do more of the same monotonous stuff over again, and it's not fun, it's boring. Oh, look, I finally got enough hearts to go and buy a plant that I need to cross the swamp, now let me get to the store. (It changes to night in-game.) Oh shit, it's fuckin' night time, now the stores are all closed and I have to wait for it to turn day again. Oh well, I might as well kill some zombies in the meantime and stock up on some more hearts. (The character in-game falls in the water and dies.) OH SHIT! Now I gotta start all over again. One of the worst things in the game are the Pitfalls, which are areas where there's, like, stones or blocks that look like you could walk on them, but instead you just fall through. It's impossible to tell where these spots are the first time walkin' through, so you just have to keep throwin' Holy Water all over to see where they are. It's retarded. Why should I have to do that? Again, it doesn't add up to any of the fun, y'know, challenge of the game. It's just unfair and it's annoying. In the dungeons, there's no bosses at the end, which is a big disappointment. Every Nintendo gamester knows that at the end of a level or a dungeon labyrinth, whatever, there's always supposed to be a big guy who ya fight. But here, they just got lazy and only put a few bosses in the game and left some of the dungeons just empty like this one. So, most of the dungeons you go through (the mansions, to be exact), there's nothing at the end except for a crystal orb that you can't touch. In the rest of the Castlevania games the tradition goes like this: You fight a boss, you defeat 'im, then an orb comes down and you touch it, there you go, on to the next level. But in Castlevania 2, how would you ever figure out that you're supposed to throw an Oak Stake at that orb? I mean, when you first get the Oak Stake you assume it's a weapon, and you throw it, only to find that it does absolutely nothing, and that you waste it by throwing it, so you have to get it all over again. There are parts in the game that are definitely not self-explanatory, and are too hard to figure out. Take this dead end for example: Would you guess that you're supposed to pass through this wall? How? You have to kneel down by it for like ten seconds. Now, still, that's not enough to make it so cryptic and hidden that we can't figure it out, oh please, give us more for our buck and make it harder so we can wander around the whole game and exhaust every possibility before we find out. Okay. Guess what? You need to have a Red Crystal selected, and be kneeling down, and wait a little while before this magic tornado comes and takes you to the next part of the game. Most of the townspeople have things to say which aren't important at all, so why do you have to read 'em? Here, in the dungeons, there's books that you may find which actually give you clues about things in the game that you may need to know about. But, when I find these books, half the time it's by accident, so I may hit the button and cancel it out which means I don't even get to read it and I don't have a second chance. Why can't I do that when it changes from day to night? That would actually be helpful. So, what the game designers figured is this: it isn't absolutely necessary for me to read about how to find Dracula's castle or what I'm supposed to do with an Oak Stake, but what I do need to read, again and again constantly, is: "The morning sun has vanquished the horrible night". How about "vanquished this horrible GAME"? The only sure way to get through this awful game is to enter a code, but even that is way more tedious than it should be. While most of the Castlevania games have symbols you enter for a code, this one just has a whole bunch of numbers. I mean, like, one of those little parts would be enough for a password. But why four? Like why so many? In general, I hate games that have passwords like this, because sometimes they have uppercase and lowercase letters. Like the l's, you know, look like I's, the 0's look like O's, the 8's look like 5's so, why does there have to be so many digits? Y'know, like why can't it just be numbers or somethin'? Like, y'know, just numbers and not letters? I mean, it takes me, like, five minutes to enter this code when it should only take, like, five seconds. It's friggin' stupid. Okay, so, say we enter the code, and we go to Dracula's castle. You'll be pretty disappointed how anticlimactic this game is. It isn't even worth putting in a code, let alone playing the whole game all the way through, which, if you did, I feel bad for you. I mean, first of all: there's no enemies in Dracula's castle, you just walk all the way through and the only obstacles are just, like, goin' up and down steps, which won't hurt you and they aren't challenging, either. It's just tedious. I mean, what the hell's the point of going through the castle if there's no way to fight? Did the game designers just, like, run out of time or somethin'? So then, you get up to Dracula, and guess what? He doesn't look anything like Dracula, he looks like a grim reaper and he throws sickles. I mean, did the people who made this game even know what Dracula is? He's a fuckin' vampire. Alright, on top of everything, Dracula's way too easy. Check this out. This is a trick I discovered myself and so could you, without the help of any strategy guide. When Dracula first appears, he stands there for a while, and he gives you plenty of time to land lots of free hits. Not only does he stand there for a long time, but everything that hits him will stun him and give you even more time. Naturally, you'll prob'ly be using the flames, because it's one of the most effective weapons in the game. But, using it against Dracula, it makes it simply impossible for him to even do anything. He has no chance. The second you start throwin' that shit at him, you've already won. I mean, why is it that easy? Did they even test this shitty game out before they released it? What a piece of shit. I mean, I feel horrible that I had to play this game in order to make this video, but I did it to demonstrate its dreadfulness and I forced myself to play it just so that you don't have to. So, you should thank me for telling you to stay away from this horrible steaming pile of goat shit. I mean, I know it's useless complaining about a game that was made back in the late 80's, or early 90's or whatever, but it just blows my mind how fuckin' horrible it is. I mean, it's consistently annoying. Why? Why is it so bad? If all these problems were changed then we'd have a great trilogy of classic Castlevania games, but, history is history, and we might as well try to count Castlevania 3 as, you know, the second in the series, and leave this awful piece of horse shit alone, as it stands today as one of the biggest fuck-ups of all time. Thank you for listening, good night. (Fade to black, and then a quick clip of the game is shown.) The ending sucks too.

#LONG POST

[fallen029]

Parenthood: Beach Retreat.2

"Boy?"

"Hmmm?"

"When you said we were going to the beach," Makarov grumbled, "I didn't think you meant a private one!"

"It's connected to the property," Laxus said simply as everyone else ran ahead of them, out the backdoor, off the huge deck back there, and down to the beach only a hundred or so yards away. "You could see it from the house. What? Did you want to go somewhere with a bunch of other people?"

Makarov just stared up at him. "Why exactly did you think I was going to the beach? I could have stayed home to see all these women. What good are they going to do me?"

At the moment, none. Evergreen, almost immediately, was setting out on getting a tan as Lisanna and Mirajane, both very fair skinned and therefore knowing the dangers of a day at the beach, slathered all three of the little boys in sunscreen.

Nothing fun for Makarov at all.

"Mommy, hurry!" Nathan either. "I don't need this!"

"Yes, you do."

"No."

"Behave, brat," Laxus grumbled as he left Makarov to himself and rushed down to where they were standing. "'fore I spank ya."

Mace was standing perfectly still for his Aunt Lisanna, though his eyes were trained over on the ocean. "Just take it, Nate," he said. "Then we can go play."

"Bickslow," Lisanna called out when, finally, she and her sister let the older boys go and Mirajane got to work on getting Pike coated in the stuff. "Come here. Let me put sunscreen on you."

The man, at the moment, was scouring the beach for crabs and did not have time for such foolery.

"No."

"Bickslow-"

"I don't need it."

"I'm not peeling your sunburn again for you," she warned. "So get over here."

"I don't wanna!"

"Bickslow, just go," Freed huffed as he went to sit with Evergreen. "You're being childish."

"Why," Ever asked as she settled into a lounge chair she'd had Elfman lug out there, "could you not put on your own sunscreen?"

"Because," he whispered to them as he passed, "then I wouldn't get Lissy to rub all over my body. I just gotta resist a little and then, bam! She not only does the tedious task for me, I also get a rubdown beforehand."

"Just remember there are children around," Freed sighed as Ever made a face.

Laxus though was far more concerned with getting Mira all lathered up though.

"You need me to put some sun tan lotion or something on you, demon?" he asked, trying to keep his tone suggestive. It was hard, considering they were in the presence of their three year old who, at the moment, was staring anxiously over at the water, fearing for his life.

"What, Lax?" Mira hardly glanced up at him from where she was on the ground, on her knees, trying to get Pike beach ready. "Did you say something?"

Frowning, he only took to looking at the boy as well. "Nothin'. Just… Hey. Pike. This is your first time to the beach, huh? You want me to go take you down to the water? Or Mommy?"

At her name (or at least what he called her), the toddler looked back at his mother. She was dressed in a bikini and it reminded him of the few times he'd gone to the pool up at the guild. Mirajane usually told him he was too little for it. Once though, his Aunt Ever and Uncle Elf had gotten a little plastic pool in their backyard for him and the other two boys to play in. That was ruined though by the doggy deciding for whatever reason that it was his pool and that he was going to go lay down in it and get it all dirty and nasty.

The thought alone made the boy glance around for the dog, placing him out on the beach, chasing around Bickslow's babies as they cried for help, their father and mother far too interested in rubbing one another with lotion to care.

"Mommy," Pike finally said to which Laxus grunted before trying to walk off.

"Wait, Lax," Mira was quick to call as she finished up with Pike and got to her feet. "You can go with us, huh? Here, carry the beach bag down to the sand and set out some towels. Okay? And here, Pike, you want me to carry you?"

When he held out his arms, his mommy easily lifted him into them, snuggling him while she was at it. He just tried to burrow his head in her chest and hide though.

"Pike," Mira complained though Laxus only snickered.

"Boy's got the right idea."

"Beheave," she huffed. "And did anyone explain the rules to Mace and Nathan?"

"Yes," Laxus growled. "I think you did. Remember? Oh, a thousand times?"

"I just," Mirajane said as she watched where they were out in the water with Elfman, who was just as excitedly playing with them, "know how fast things can go wrong."

"Mira, we're all here. They're fine."

"And that's fine," she insisted. "But they're not allowed to get in the water without one of us. That's not a stupid rule, Laxus."

"I didn't say it was. Just…unnecessary."

"Do I need to go over how many drowning happen a year?"

"Ugh. No. I don't care anyways. They won't drown."

"No one thinks their kid will." Then she paused. "I mean, unless they're trying to drown them or-"

"Demon, I get it, alright? You made a rule and I'm gonna make them follow it. Alright?"

Pike had no problem with that rule. None at all. Leaving his head pressed against his mother's chest, he left his arms clinging to her, fearful as, once they had the towels set out, she and his daddy walked him over to where the water was just barely breaching the surface of the sand.

"Here, baby, let go," Mirajane said, bending down then to set him back down on the ground. He wouldn't though.

"Mommy-"

"Mira, if he don't like it-"

"Shush, Lax." She only got back down on her knees again with the boy, gently removing his arms from around her. "There. You're okay. Look down, Pike. No, not at me. At the ground. See? Look, baby. It's just water."

Laxus watched as the boy, tentatively, reached down to pat at the wet stand. When the water came rushing back towards land, only the white foam leftover got to where they were standing.

It was still to much for Pike, the toddler jerking his hand back in surprise. Mirajane just giggled though.

"Buddy, it's just water," Laxus said before slowly walking further out into it. "See? Come on. You can come to me."

It felt weird beneath his feet. The whole thing did. Pike wasn't sure if he liked it. The sand then the wet sand and now water?

"Go to Daddy," Mira said, pushing him gently. Pike glanced at her before, very carefully, making the short trek (it honestly was only a foot or two), over to the man.

Then the water had to come in, scare him, and make the toddler fall down crying.

It was just all too much! He wanted to go home to his own bed with his own blankies where no stupid beach could ever hurt him!

"Pike's such a baby," Nathan complained from over where he and his cousin were taking turns splashing the other boy's father from all angles.

"Real men know how to cry!" Elfman assured him. "And stop splashing me!"

"Awe, poor Pike," Lisanna said from over where she and Bickslow were trying to chase down the dog and get him to stop bothering the babies (honestly, he was about out of breath anyways). "Look, Bicks."

"I can hear 'im," he assured her. "And I'll worry about him when the damn mutt leaves my own babies alone!"

"Papa," they all cried. "Papa."

Pike though was crying for the exact opposite. He just wanted his mother to take him home.

When would they be going back there? That was a good place. A safe place. Where craziness like water and sand surrounding you just didn't happen! What was wrong with just staying in safe places where sanity ruled the day and freaking water was just allowed to roam free?

Huh?

"What's wrong then, boy?" Makarov was over to them then, coming to stare down at his grandson. Mirajane had only taken him back to the beach towel to sit down and take a break from the ocean for a bit. "Hmmm?"

"He's afraid of the water, Master," Mirajane said, glancing up at the man. "Pike's not really big on things he doesn't understand."

Laxus sighed as he dug through that bag that Mirajane had brought out there, pulling out a plastic shovel and a pail.

"Here you go, buddy," he said, moving to hand him the bucket and shovel. "You just play up here, huh? In the sand? You wanna do that? Then, if you get ready again, Daddy will take you out into the water. Okay?"

Pike only sniffled. "Sand?"

"Mmmhmm." Mirajane gently pried him off her before setting him down next to the towel. "Here. You can just play with sand. Daddy, will you build sandcastles with him?"

"I gotta get a beer first."

"Laxus." That got him a glare for some reason. Ugh.

"I will play with you, Pike," the boy's great-grandfather assured as, with what seemed like a lot of pain, he managed to sit down in the sand. Laxus made a face before heading back up to the house to get him a foldout chair as well as go fill the cooler with some drinks for the kids and some beers for him (maybe the others too). How had they forgotten that?

"Ugh," Ever, clad in a green bikini, groaned from where she was trying to tan, sunglasses replacing her usual ones. "Why did we bring children again? If they're not crying they're laughing far too loudly."

"Hmmm." Freed only hummed, sitting there in the sand, watching Elfman play with the boys in disinterest. "Had you not all insisted on popping them out, we wouldn't have that problem."

Meh. He had a point.

"You know, Lissy," Bickslow said as, once they finally got all the babies rounded up and the dog went off somewhere to catch his breath (and hopefully not die) the two went back to looking for those crabs he was searching for before. "This place has me thinking."

"About?"

"Mystery. Intrigue. Deception."

"You read the back of one of those books in the study, didn't you?"

He nodded. "It's got me to realize that I need to read more. You know that I couldn't even figure out some of those words in that summery?"

"Why doesn't that surprise me?"

Laxus was back then, lugging the ice chest along behind him.

"You know," he said as he watched Pike slowly fill up the bucket. "I think I need to take the second pail and get some water. You need a bit of it to make good sandcastles."

Mirajane was laying out then, on her towel, and only said, "Hand me my sunglasses, dragon. Out of the bag."

Oh, he did. And, since her eyes were closed, he also bopped his grandfather in the head when he saw his gaze linger a bit too long on his demon.

Damn Gramps.

Eventually, Nate and Mace grew bored of the ocean (sorta) and came over to Laxus and Mirajane for drinks and their turn with the bucket and shovel.

"I think I brought some more," Mira told them as Laxus only frowned at them. "Have whoever's driest to go inside with you and get them. I think your mom, Mace, is-"

"Not moving," she sang from over where she was. "So don't ask me anything!"

"Then, Lax, go get them. I think they're in the kitchen with the other stuff I bought at the store."

"Why do I always gotta go get shit?" he grumbled once he was far enough away that his demon didn't overhear. "Huh?"

Nate only plopped down, juice box in hand, watching as Pike would, continually, fill up the bucket before dumping it out and starting again.

"Mommy, he's not playing right."

"Let him play however he wants, Nate," she sighed as she shut her eyes again. "Daddy's getting you your own bucket to play with."

"Everyone plays differently, boy," Makarov told him though Nate just didn't believe that.

"Hey. Pssst." Bickslow, from not far off, was gesturing to the boys. "C'mere for a second. You two."

Lisanna was off at that point, with her brother and Bickslow's dolls, sitting where the water came in, talking, which left the seith up to his dastardly deeds.

And also in need of a partner in crime.

Err, partners, as it were.

After explaining the situation to the two little boys, they giggled, nodding their blonde and brown heads in agreement, before setting off to do as asked of them.

"Hi, Mommy."

"Hi, Aunt Ever."

Freed was gone off somewhere when they got over to the woman and she only stared at them wearily from behind her sunglasses.

"Ask your father for whatever you want, Mace," she told him simply. "Or someone else. I'm busy."

She usually was.

"No, Aunt Ever," Nate insisted. "We want you."

"Want me for what?" she asked with a frown.

"Just to tell you that we love you," Mace told her with a grin. "Because we do."

Nathan nodded. "A lot."

"A whole lot."

"A big lot!"

"Mace, that's not a word."

"Big is a word."

"Yeah, but it don't go with-"

"Yes, it does."

"No, it doesn't."

"Yes, it does."

"No."

"Yes."

"No, it doesn't!"

"Yes, it does!"

Ever only blinked, eyes still on them, before slowly laying back down. Shutting her eyes once more, she didn't even glance behind her, didn't even have to, as she said, "Bickslow, if you drop that damn crab on me, I'll turn you, your girlfriend, and everyone else to stone just for good measure."

"Awe, Ever. How'd you know I was-"

"And don't bother me anymore, boys," she warned before throwing down her usual threat. "Unless you wanna become statues, that is."

Dejected, they only watched as Bickslow, who was holding the crab by a claw, made a wrong move with it and ended up with his finger in its pinchers. That made the whole thing worth it for them as the seith ran around then, howling in pain.

Laxus was glad he got back just in time to see that. It really was something worth seeing.

"That," he told Mirajane as he came over to her, a stack of plastic buckets with shovels in the top of one held in his hands, "made this whole dang trip worth it."

"Mmmm," she sighed as she sat up and removed her sunglasses, just to watch as Elfman and Lisanna tried to help Bickslow calm down and get the thing off him. "Still waiting on my moment."

"Daddy!" Nate and Mace were back then, the former holding out his arms. "All for me?"

"Yep." He handed over the buckets to them. "So you two leave Pike alone, alright?"

"Okay," Mace said as Nate nodded. Now that they had their own stuff to play with, they had no need for the toddler. Freed, who had gone off to walk down the beach some and look around, had come rushing back at the sound of the seith's yelling. When he saw what was wrong, he only rolled his eyes before heading over to where the Master and Mira were, getting there about the same time Laxus was sending the older two boys off to play.

"Ah," he said as the sight of them with their buckets and pails. "I take it you heard then?"

"Heard what?" Nate asked, glancing up at him as the boy's father just went to take a seat next to his demon. "Freed?"

Grinning down at them, if only slightly, he said, "About the treasure, of course."

"Treasure?" Mace shook his head. "What treasure?"

"Surely you know," the letter mage insisted. "About the pirate ship that crashed here? And the captain that, in his final moments, buried his treasure somewhere on this beach? I took it that was why you had buckets and shovels."

Nate blinked. Then he took off running.

"Come on, Mace. Start digging!"

"Great," Mirajane remarked as Freed joined them, slowly lowering her sunglasses over her eyes. "That'll keep them busy for hours."

"Or keep them up all night when I tell them about how the pirate's ghost is gonna get 'em tonight for messin' with his stuff," Laxus offered.

"Considering you're not doing that," Mira ordered as she laid back down, "I don't think we have to worry about it."

Nodding over at Bickslow, Freed asked, "Prank gone wrong?"

"Horribly," Makarov remarked, though he was only looking down at Pike from the chair Laxus brought him, watching the boy, once more, dump out his bucket before beginning to refill it. "Say, did the two of you know then? That this beach was private?"

"Oh, Gramps, shut up about it," Laxus grumbled from the other side of Mirajane. Freed, who was at his other side, only shrugged.

"What of it?"

"Yeah, Master," Mira agreed as she closed her eyes again. "I prefer it. I don't have to worry about someone walking off with one of the kids."

Freed nodded. "Ever mentioned it and I didn't think it was worth caring about either way."

"He's just mad that he don't have any young women to gawk at," Laxus grumbled as, reaching over Mirajane, he gently ticked Pike, making the boy giggle. "Old perv."

"That is not why!"

Mira, used to the man's antics, only hummed. And Freed shrugged.

That was rarely a problem for either of them.

"Besides, Gramps," Laxus grumbled. "You do know that all of us are married, right? And whatever the hell Bickslow and Lisanna are."

At the moment? Very panicked over his finger.

"Dating," Mira sighed. "They're dating."

"For this long?"

"Some people take things slow, dragon. Not just sleep with the babysitter."

"You shut it." She got poked that time. "Demon."

"I remind you," Freed offered, "that I am very much so single."

"Oh, Freed, he wasn't forgetting you," Mirajane assured him. "Just…well… You don't really date much as it is, so-"

"But he should still be free to look at all the women he wants," Makarov insisted.

"Believe me," Laxus sighed as the man blushed and looked off. "He doesn't want."

"If it's that big of a deal, Master," Mira started. "I'm sure someone will go with you to a public part of the beach. I would, but you probably wouldn't like that much at all."

"I just like going to meet people. To talk to them. Not what either of you are insinuating."

"Uh-huh."

"I don't."

"I suppose tomorrow we can go to the public beach," Freed offered when Laxus elbowed him. Really, the thought was not a fun one for him. At all. "If you wish, Master."

"Perhaps," he agreed softly, no doubt embarrassed then by all of their assumptions. "We will see."

"Freed and Gramps," Laxus remarked as Pike dumped over another bucket of sand. "Out scoping the coast for women. I almost wanna go to see this."

That made him get elbowed, though it was from his demon and it was actually a pinch to the leg.

"I said almost." He grinned down at her, regardless of the fact she had her eyes shut. "I got my view right here."

And, more importantly, it was only his view. Not out there with all the others who just thought they could freely view the greatness that was Laxus Dreyar's wife. Because they couldn't. She was his.

Freed only looked off, over at where he spotted Mace and Nathan, diligently staying away from the water and within the parameters of where they were allowed to be, digging like crazy through the sand. Grinning, he decided that later he'd draw them up a pretend map to play with as well.

Again, Pike dumped out his bucket. "Sand. Daddy, sand!"

"I see, buddy." The man smiled over at him. "You ready to try the water again?"

"No."

"Really? Pike, I promise you, nothing bad will happen. Do you think that I would ever let you get hurt? Huh?"

Maybe. He wasn't sure. Back home? Where everything was safe and familiar? Of course not. But in this scary new portion of the world that he was introduced to, anything could happen. Look at poor Uncle Bickslow! Running around with his finger all wonky. Did that happen back home, in the apartment, where they could all play with blocks and not be attacked by nature? No. It couldn't.

"I wouldn't, buddy," Laxus insisted. "And you know that."

"Mmmm, Lax," Mira sighed. "Maybe we can try the water again tomorrow, huh? I'm sure he'll be more receptive then."

Laxus wasn't. He knew Pike. New things were not, well, his thing. And the beach wasn't only new. It was completely unknown. It could take forever to get him prepared to brave it again.

Which probably was a good thing. The less adventurous the boy was, the less chance he had of getting hurt.

Unlike the other one. Sigh. Laxus only looked over at where he was ecstatically digging away, hoping to find that loot Freed had told him about.

The sight alone made him smile. So the trip wasn't all bad after all.

"Boss? Did you know that crabs are horrible creatures with no heart and no sense of humor?"

Then Bickslow and Lisanna had to come over to ruin it.

"Hey, Pike," the woman said as she bent down to look at him. Laxus saw the Master take stock of her, but as usual, Lisanna paled in comparison to the other women around her.

Except to Bickslow, but Laxus wasn't so sure that his screwy eyes weren't the cause of that.

"What'cha doin'?" Lisanna grinned as he only looked up at her before dumping out his bucket again.

"It's sand," he explained before going back to filling the bucket. "Aunt Lissy."

"Awe."

"Bickslow," Laxus grumbled as he frowned at the standing man and his wounded finger. "Why didn't you just possess the crab, huh?"

"Eh?"

"And then control it to… What were you doing?"

"I's gonna drop it on Ever. Down her bikini top."

Freed shook his head. "What a waste."

"I know! I found a perfectly good crab and-"

"I meant of brains."

Lisanna snickered. "What brains?"

"Hey!"

"You could have," Laxus interjected, "just controlled the crab to crawl over there and do whatever to her. I mean, dude, that's literally your magic. What the hell's wrong with you?"

"Well… I don't know!"

"Once again," Freed chuckled. "Laxus has proven himself to be not only an expert at his own magic, but others' as well."

Mirajane though only sat up though, glaring at the seith. "No one," she hissed at them all, "is putting anything down anyone's bikini top. Or bottom for that matter. Understand?"

"Sheesh, Mrs. Boss," he grumbled. "You don't gotta mother us all too. I'm not a kid."

"I'm not mothering you. If I catch you doing that to Ever though, you're not going to be allowed back out here with us. Understand?"

"You're mothering me. Everyone see this, right? She's trying to mother me!"

Lisanna nodded as she grinned over at Mira. "Yeah, sis. Can you not turn that stuff off now or what?"

"I'm not-"

"You kinda are, demon," Laxus said as Freed only nodded.

Makarov though snickered. "It sounded like a grand old joke to me, boy."

"Thank you, Master," Bickslow said with a nod. "I guess some people are just too much of mothers to appreciate it."

Mira only glared at him before looking at the others. "I am not."

"It's okay," Lisanna told her with a shrug. "I mean, you are sort of a mother."

"Yeah, but I'm not just a mother."

"No one said you were," Laxus assured her. "Though this was kinda telling…"

"Laxus!"

"I'm kidding."

"I'm not," she told them all. "Seriously. Just… Go away, Bickslow. Go play or something."

"Okay, Mom."

"Stop it!" Then, with a huff, Mirajane laid back down and shut her eyes.

She wasn't mothering them. Any of them. Other than her babies. And sometimes Mace. That was all.

Gosh, why did she even have to explain that?

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