#((he's so cool and sexy for no reason but i am very normal about him i promise))

[i-wanna-hug]

【 𝐓 𝐇 𝐄 𝐃 𝐑 𝐀 𝐆 𝐎 𝐍 】

#katana zero #fifteen #my art #((KATANA ZERO TURNED 4 YEARS OLD LIKE 2 DAYS AGO AND I MISSED IT I'M SORRY LASDHFLSDUHF *dies*)) #((he's so cool and sexy for no reason but i am very normal about him i promise))

[thankskenpenders]

Help me out here: Why is there so much Ian Flynn hate going around lately? I thought everyone loved that he was contributing to the games. Now suddenly they aren't. I guess that's par for the course for this series but I don't get it. He isn't perfect but I like what he's done. Am I a weirdo?

Ian Flynn has always had a lot of fans, but any creator putting their work out there is going to have detractors as well. That's just the nature of being an artist. To some extent, it's no big deal. He's not a perfect writer. Nobody is! I consider myself a fan of his work, but I've criticized plenty of individual writing decisions from him on here.

But Ian doesn't just have critics. He has his own obsessive hatedom. And the specific nature of Ian's hatedom is... interesting.

A decade ago, Ian was only the guy writing for Archie Sonic, meaning any debates over his work were quarantined within that tiny niche of the larger Sonic fandom. Only people who kept up with the comics month to month had any real reason to have an opinion on the guy, which means we're talking about merely thousands of fans as opposed to millions.

Within that group, he had some haters. You had the people who were mad about story changes made during his run, particularly things like ancillary characters getting killed off (although over the years we've learned that most of those were editorial mandates from Mike Pellerito). You had the people mad that Ian didn't push their favorite ship, with feuding SonAmy and Sonally fans claiming that he was CLEARLY biased towards one or the other. You had the people who just really, really liked one of the previous writers way more - usually Penders, as hard as that may be to believe today. That sort of thing. Pretty normal comic fandom type stuff. Again, it comes with the territory.

Unfortunately, many of those haters only got worse over time, morphing into reactionaries who constantly try to incite Comicsgate type culture war bullshit.

There are people still mad at Ian for making Sally bi and pairing her with Nicole instead of Sonic in the later Archie comics. There have been elaborate MS Paint red string conspiracy boards explaining how people like Ian and Jon Gray have apparently been destroying the franchise from the inside for years by Making Sonic Woke. (Jon gets dragged into this because people are still mad about him drawing The Slap 20 years later. Yes, really!!) There was an unhinged change.org petition trying to get Ian fired, specifically from people who were mad that the Freedom Fighters aren't in the IDW comics. There was even a very sad little fan campaign from these people trying to get Sega to move the Sonic comic license away from IDW and over to Udon, because they thought Udon would bring Sally and Bunnie back and also make them sexy again. There's a lot of this.

(Unfortunately, Penders has also exacerbated this by gossiping about Ian on Twitter and giving these fans ammo, but that's a whole 'nother discussion.)

The thing is, for years, people who only played the games or watched the cartoons had no reason to pay attention to any of this. Now, though, Ian isn't just writing for some weird spinoff comics that only the super nerds read. Now he's writing comics that are canon to the games, and ALSO some of the games themselves, and ALSO consulting on other tie-in media like Sonic Prime, and ALSO writing the official Sonic encyclopedia, and ALSO serving as part of the new Sonic Lore Team at Sega. And on top of all this, he's got an increasingly popular podcast where he fields questions about his work on all of these things, which serves as one of the fandom's main windows into creative decisions being made behind the scenes.

As a fan of Ian's work, it's been really cool to see him rise in prominence. But the dark side of this is that his obsessive haters from the Archie days now have WAY more of a potential audience of their own. Now, every Sonic fan has to have an opinion on Ian. What this frequently means is that you'll have the Comicsgate types taking things Ian writes or says out of context, attempting to get more of the general fandom to yell at the guy.

Unfortunately, there are a wide variety of Sonic fans who take the bait:

You've got hardcore fans who disliked basically any recent piece of Sonic media and are looking for someone to blame.

You've got the people who are concerned about the sanctity of Sonic's canon, who shoot the messenger any time Ian mentions a new retcon from Sonic Team on the podcast - or any time he even mentions the THOUGHT of changing anything about the canon, as we saw recently with the Sol Dimension nonsense.

You've got people who romanticize some sort of mythical artistic vision that Sega of Japan supposedly has (or had) for the franchise. To many of these fans, American contributors like Ian just don't "get" the heart of the series and are trying to turn Sonic into something different. (This "heart of the series" tends to be some mix of Japanese instruction manual lore, the cinematics from Sonic CD, the OVA, and/or the games written by Shiro Maekawa, depending on what Sonic media the fan in question grew up with.)

You've got fans of specific characters or ships who pin the blame for how their faves are depicted entirely on Ian - most vocally fans of Shadow, even though the root problem is that Sonic Team hasn't known what to do with Shadow since 2006. At best this stops at regular old criticism, but at its worst this devolves into claims that Ian has an agenda against certain characters.

You've got fans annoyed by a perceived over-emphasis on comic-original characters in the IDW comics, ignoring the obvious facts that these characters exist because the game cast is so tightly controlled by Sega, and also, you know, that people just like the IDW characters and want more stories about them.

You've got a LOT of discourse over IDW's Sonic being a hero who tries to give his enemies second chances, as if half of Sonic's closest friends aren't already former villains and rivals. Honestly this is very transparently just reheated Steven Universe discourse lmao

You'll also see people who just think they could do Ian's job better. They can't believe that THIS GUY is the American fan working on all these Sonic projects, when clearly THEY understand the characters and lore and themes SO much better than this charlatan.

All it takes is for someone in one of these categories to be unhappy about some recent piece of Sonic media, and for them to come across an out of context quote or comic panel that rubs them the wrong way, and suddenly the leftist Zoomer Sonic fans will join the latest dogpile on Ian alongside the reactionary Comicsgate types who are mad at him for Making Sonic Woke.

In general, when fandoms get upset, they tend to want a scapegoat. A person or two to point a finger at and go "THAT's who ruined the thing I love!" This tends to be based less on reality and more on which contributors are the most visible online. You'll sometimes see teenage and adult fans of children's cartoons single out a storyboarder who's particularly vocal on Twitter, blame them for every story decision they don't like, and harass them off the platform out of a sense of retribution for their favorite ship or whatever. Failing that, fans might choose to blame every nitpick, down to individual lines of dialogue and frames of animation, on a showrunner, just because that's the name they associate with the show. And unfortunately, when it comes to Sonic, Ian is now arguably the most prolific and outspoken contributor on the English speaking internet, and therefore a common scapegoat.

Some of the things I've seen Ian blamed for are truly wild. A lot of people have claimed for YEARS that he's just lying about the existence of creative guidelines and restrictions from Sega - or, as fans call them, The Mandates - even though they're just an inherent aspect of working on a licensed property. Others claim that The Mandates are real, but somehow Ian's fault. A vocal minority of fans have convinced themselves that Ian is the sole reason the Freedom Fighters don't exist in the IDW comics, even though Ian says he's been pushing to bring them back since day one.

Sometimes you'll see people say he ruined shit he didn't even work on. A few weeks ago on Twitter I saw someone claim that Ian had written a rejected script for Sonic Forces in which Tails died. I could not find a source for this for the life of me. As far as I can tell, the rumor seems to have been born from an alleged leaked script for Forces with margin notes from Aaron Webber that criticized the way Tails was written, and also an old tweet where Aaron joked that Tails would die in an upcoming episode of Sonic Mania Adventures. These merged into "Aaron Webber criticized a draft of the Forces script in which Tails died." How'd Ian get dragged into this? Who fucking knows!

It's all just a big game of telephone. All it takes is some asshole to make something up about Ian on Twitter or YouTube or a DeviantArt journal or some forum, and at least a couple people will believe it, and then it gets repeated as fact. Again, this used to be contained by the niche nature of the Archie Sonic fandom, but now there are WAY more people who are receptive to this shit.

It's just sad to me that Ian tries to be so open and honest about his work, to try to explain the rationale for certain things, to keep fans looped in on the direction the franchise is headed, and this just gives the Flynnspiracy types more quotes to take out of context and try to paint him as the devil. If it sounds like I'm being overly defensive and dismissing his critics, man... some of the things I've seen people say directly to him are just unbelievable. People will send paragraphs-long angry screeds in to his podcast that completely tear him apart, and he has to sit there and be like "Well, that's your opinion, and you're entitled to it." People literally pay for special guest interview episodes where they just rapid fire complaints about his writing at him directly to his face. I don't know how he does it. I would snap.

All of this over Sonic the fucking Hedgehog of all things.

I don't know how to wrap this up. Engaging with fandoms online is very tiring, which is why I tend not to do it. Things like this are too common. I guess, just... remember that making art collaboratively is a complicated thing. The people involved are generally trying their best given the circumstances, but they're only human. They make mistakes. But please treat them like humans. Criticism and dogpiling are not the same thing.

#anon #ask #tkp asks #tkp post

[most-datable-datable-bracket]

ROUND 5 MATCH 3

Elliott propaganda:

“Just look at him. Pure hunk energy.”

“I will punch anyone who dislikes him. He’s like a fire emblem character in the modern day. He’s so flamboyant and handsome, he can play the piano and he’s best friends with the old fishing man!”

“dramatic writer man with sexy hair”

"Since I like elliott. I will state some reasons why I like him

Imagine if Mr. Darcy didn’t insult your family first time you met him, that’s Elliott. The man who’s basically the hallmark romance love interest. He’s a writer who moves to the small town in the country side to find inspiration for his writing. Then he finds the farmer.

He has a crab living in his pocket

He can play the piano (hopefully it isn’t the river flows in you however)

His fans sometimes hc him as a merman and that’s just a major plus IMO

He genre of the book he writes is dependent on what genre you say you like.

He also sends letters to you if you marry him

Okay and also some things I dislike

His liked gifts, the easiest one is pomegranates, which cost like 6000g to grow a tree if you don’t pick the fruit cave. I AM NOT GETTING SQUID INK IN YEAR ONE FOR YOU.

he might be British /j

The fact he has no kitchen but still likes food like lobster, like he is just a mystery. Lives in a cabin, with no kitchen, no washroom (okay no character has a washroom), but still likes the most fancy food out there and has luscious hair worthy of a L’Oréal ad.

Gifting him on rainy days when you don’t have two hearts"

Dimitri propaganda:

“He's chivalrous, he's blood thirsty, all rolled up into one package and calling you "his beloved". Get you a man who can do both.”

“My husband <3 He's schizophrenic just like me and I love him for that.”

"First, look at him. No disrespect to the monster lovers, but even if blonde, blue-eyed hunks aren't your thing, you can't deny that Dimitri is very pretty.

Second, one of the things I love most about Dimitri is how self aware he is of his privilege as a prince (or king) and how seriously he treats the gravity of his position. He has a strong sense of duty and wants to be a good leader who listens to and provides for the needs of all of his people. This includes the citizens of Duscur, who were nearly wiped out by his own countrymen in (mistaken) retaliation for his father's murder. His commitment to righting this wrong is one of his primary goals in life.

Third, while he is more than capable of crushing a man's skull with his bare hands, under normal circumstances he absolutely wouldn't. A large part of the reason why his fall is so shocking and devastating to witness is because by the time he snaps, we know that Dimitri is actually a kind and gentle soul who hates violence and understands that even his enemies are human. Even at his worst point he still recognizes this, which feeds into his extreme self loathing. He extends compassion and forgiveness to others but struggles mightily to allow himself any forbearance for his own mistakes. He's kind quite literally to a fault, as his empathy is both his greatest strength AND his biggest flaw and I find that as heartwarming as it is heartbreaking."

"Okay first for all the "he needs therapy haha funny" (and its annoying corollary "I can fix him") comments, 1) don't we all? And 2) you can't romance him til end game when he is in a much healthier place due to his own choice to change his priorities and the support of you and his friends. He battles daily with severe mental illness in a repressed society that doesn't talk about it. And on multiple occasions tells people that it is okay to feel your feelings and offers support despite his own struggles (I include that bc that is a date able trait to me). If he's not your fave that's cool, but leave the ableist language out of it pretty please 💙💙 Okay reasons he should be your boyfriend now!!

He calls you his beloved and wants to hold your hand 🥺

His happiest moments in game are when you smile

And in conclusion, he is shaped like a dorito and has a huge cloak to snuggle you up in"

#sdv elliott #elliott stardew valley #stardew valley #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd #Fire Emblem #Fire Emblem: Three Houses #FE:3H #Round 5 #MDDC 2

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.” For Jesper x Reader??

For you my beloved anything, but especially Jesper content are YOU KIDDING ME this man understands the assignment.

It's All Bad Choices From Here On Up Baby - Jesper Fahey

Content Warnings: Gambling. Guns. Canon Compliant Threat And Violence. Jesper Being So Unbelievably Sexy All The Time. No Beta/Proof Reading.

You pull the card up from the flat of the table and it looks easy, it looks effortless, it looks entirely like you're playing the game as you should be. But Jesper spots you, from the bar, and that coy smile of his almost makes you lose your concentration. You're not cheating, at least that's what you tell yourself, it's not cheating if everyone else at the table is cheating too, it's levelling the playing field.

"Gorgeous you want to let me in on this?" Jesper whispers close to your ear as he takes a seat next to you. His words warm against your neck send a chill through you, and you know he did it on purpose, trying to throw your attention, trying to bring it back to him.

"Not a chance, I am winning," you say, giving him a playful grin.

"I am your good luck charm," Jesper argues. You look him up and down, he is wearing that purple waistcoat with the metal buttons and his smirk is all too enticing, it's that look in his eyes that gets you though, today, not unlike most days, Jesper is looking for trouble. You will not let the tables be the place he finds it though.

"Tapping out," you say, collecting your winnings. Jesper lets his smile slip for a moment, clearly disappointed you won't let him play, but he quickly perks back up again once you cash your bets.

"Couldn't let me have one game?" Jesper asks.

"No," you say, "house always wins Jes," you remind him, "besides the way you're tapping those feet, you have a reason for saddling up next to me, besides my charm."

"Do I need a reason gorgeous?" he asks, stepping closer to you as you both walk. His flirting is normal, it comes as naturally to him as breathing, and you don't hate it.

"What's the job Jes?" you ask, eager to pull the answer from him. He slips his hand down, wrapping his fingers around your wrist, his skin is cool against yours, even in the night air. He pulls you to the side and you stare up at him, not understanding his motives at all.

"You're going the wrong way," he tells you.

"I don't even know where we are going," you remind him, shaking free of his grip and giving the mans jacket a playful tug. "You still haven't told me."

"Well, it's just a usual evening," Jesper says, his smile bright even in the dingy light of the Barrel, "Kaz wants us to do a small job, you know, some bribery, a little breaking and entering."

"No breaking, just entering," Wylan says joining the fray.

"Merchling," Jesper says, not sparing the boy a glance, "didn't know you were here for this."

"I am here to prevent the breaking part," Wylan explains, fumbling with something in his bag.

“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”

"Someone has been causing trouble for Nina-,"

"No need to finish," you wave a hand at Wylan, no one messes with Nina Zenik.

"You know that's not why Kaz asked us to do this, right?" Jesper asks Wylan, "it's more about the giant sum of Kruge that he owes Kaz."

"Sure," you say, "it's about that."

Kaz was as unwilling to admit to his attachments as you were willing to admit you liked Jesper more than the playful flirting you both had going on. So needless to say, very much.

Jesper stops in his tracks and you're delayed in stopping, eyes not on the path but on Jesper, and Wylan catches the look. Wylan was not blind, he was one of the most observant people you knew and knowing Inej and Kaz Brekker, that said a lot. But there were things certain people are more inclined to notice than others. Wylan, who for all his doubts still believes in love, he sees it where it's hiding, even if it's hiding well, and you aren't sure it's hiding well.

You look at the house and you wait for Jesper to tell you that you're taking the sewer route from here, or anything more plausible or appealing than this being your destination. "That's a... that is owned by a member of the Merchant Counsel Jesper," you say staring at the harsh metal gates in front of you.

"Yes it is," he confirms.

"Tell me this isn't where we are breaking into," you say.

"This isn't where we are breaking into," Jesper says.

"You're lying," you state, the annoyance in your voice clear.

"You told me to tell you, so I did," Jesper says, "I'd do anything you asked of me when you ask like that."

You want to quip back with something equally flirty, but the looming threat of the nights plan is overriding even your fluttering feeling in your chest when he flirts with you like that. "We will not be given another job if we mess this up," you say confidently.

"We don't need to worry," Jesper says finally.

"We don't?" Wylan asks confused.

"No because if we fail this, Kaz is going to kill us, and dead people don't need jobs," Jesper says, "you ready for this?"

"Am I ready for this?" you ask yourself. "Not really, but no one messes with our Nina."

Wylan pulls a strange grey compound from a folded piece of cloth out of his satchel and starts tearing off sections to hand to each of them. "This should be able to get you through the locked doors without breaking any of the mechanisms, it'll leave a trace obviously, but it won't cause damage so that's one less thing to worry about," Wylan explains.

Jesper frowns looking at the strange grey putty in his hand. "I still hate this plan," Jesper says, but you can see it again, that thrill in his eyes he gets when he is excited. He spins his guns over, one, twice, and a third time before re-holstering them, a little way to release some of that eager, nervous energy before we have to be more tactical. "So gorgeous," he smirks at you, "what are you doing after this?"

"Well, assuming we don't die and we don't get caught by the Stadwatch," you grab a hold of one of the metal spikes on the gates side, pulling yourself up and over in one swift movement, so you stand on the other side of the gate, smirking through at Jesper as you finish, "I think you'll be buying me a drink."

Jesper chuckles. "Trying to get me drunk?" he asks.

You laugh. "Why would I need to do that when you'd do anything I asked of you dead sober," you say, turning away from him and heading up the garden.

"Does Kaz really hate me this much?" Wylan asks, opening the gate with one hand.

"Probably, but why?" Jesper asks, watching you as you walk ahead, a million thoughts he think he should keep to himself swimming in his mind.

"Because this whole third wheeling thing, it feels like a punishment."

#jesper fahey #shadow and bone #grishaverse #six of crows #jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #shadow and bone fanfic #six of crows x reader #jesper x reader #jesper fahey my man you are so ridiculously sexy I wish I could be you

[mikuni14]

The Sign - Ep 4

*sexy sound*: hooya! This series keeps on giving ✨

Let me start by saying that this whole police-investigative part is extremely silly, funny and not reflecting reality (apart from the moment when captain inspector team leader Akk says "that a victim is a victim no matter the gender"), but who am I kidding! I'm not here to analyze police work! So I completely ignore this part. Although I must admit that the police part provides incredible entertainment in the form of Captain Inspector Team Leader Akk (always), the introduction of a new, cool character accompanied by the dramatic sounds of classical music, or the interruption of an intense scene between MLs with important information about the discovery of severed genitalia 👌👌

Apart from that, as always, I like everything. I love how Tharn is shown as just a regular horny gay dude who just thinks about dicks lol How many other BLs, where b stands for BOY, show this? I also like that his fantasies are of him letting Phaya do things to him, being vulnerable by exposing his neck, being pinned down, covered by his lover's body. I also liked that Tharn relives these fantasies in the light of day and indulges in them 🤩 Oh, "sleep wherever you like" was an invitation and that's a fact you will have to pry from my cold, dead hands 😤

I love how this show keeps creating "their things", constantly building them into a couple that has their own behaviors and traits in common, before they even become a real couple. Now it's a shirt grabbing. I love it, I love it when something like this appears and I know 100% that I and the rest of the fans are in these moments like 👀👀 *di Caprio pointing at tv meme*. For me, it's a very important part of a romance when the couple has their "things". "Don't let me hear you talking about you being dead ever again" is such a powerful phrase. Raw. Just as Phaya likes.

I REALLY LIKED THIS WHOLE SCENE WITH THE FURIOUS PHAYA. Everything was perfect here. I really like that Phaya got the opportunity to show this side of him. That he is shown as an angry man, that he is not an ideal man who can control his - also negative - emotions in every situation. Normally, I don't like or tolerate such situations, because the reasons for such outbursts are usually stupid. In this case, I absolve Phaya of his aggressive behavior and his outburst of anger towards Tharn, pushing him away. It wasn't ignoring his calls, which Phaya immediately confronted and resolved. It wasn't an outburst out of jealousy or something like that. This is a completely different, serious situation that only partially concerns his relationship with Tharn. I'm absolutely sure that Phaya has often wondered whether he is mentally ill and that it is a source of a serious fear for him. Mental illness is a taboo in all cultures around the world, as Tharn himself says at the beginning of the series regarding his visions. A physically ill person will be perceived differently than a mentally ill person and Tharn knows this, PHAYA KNOWS THIS and Dr. Poison knows this. The second thing is that Phaya genuinely cares for and trusts Tharn. So at this point Phaya is in agony because not only has his most personal fears been brought to light, it was done by a stranger, a person he can't stand, who is his rival, who finishes him off with the final blow in a calm way when everything inside him is falling apart, but what's more, the blow came from a direction that Phaya DIDN'T expect at all. Phaya asks Tharn several times: "Why did you do that?" because he feels BETRAYED. Phaya is also a proud man who wants his beloved to see only "good and cool" qualities in him, which is completely normal in any relationship, hence his heartbreaking question "DO YOU THINK I'M NUTS?" Really, this scene is great: - Phaya angry, humiliated, hurt, betrayed, barely able to control himself (but even then he doesn't hurt Tharn, the scene is full of aggression and screaming, but Phaya never once crosses the impassable (for me) boundary, he doesn't beat Tharn, it's not even a fight, only two adult, trained men, one of whom pins the other) -Tharn, who is shocked because for the first time Phaya ignores him, does not look at him, it is clear that he is truly angry with him. You can see how Tharn is lost in this new situation, as he stands uncertainly and asks "I'm talking to you. Can you hear me?". And even then, he immediately shows concern for Phaya and his wound on his forehead

I'm grateful for showing this version of Phaya, and also for showing him as a silly, goofy guy throughout the episode in various funny scenes. 👌👌

My theory is that Tharn didn't tell the doctor about Phaya's dreams, I feel like the doctor KNOWS about everything and is a figure who simply has knowledge of what's going on as a deity. He knows when Tharn is especially close to Phaya, as seen in the temple scene, the kiss scene, in breaking of the photo frame, also when he tells Phaya that they will see each often other from now on, when he invites him to dinner with the clear intention of destroying him. I feel like the doc just KNOWS about Phaya's dreams.

Wild theory time! To expand on my original theory, this old woman/girl has helped Wansarat in the past and is helping him now. Wansarat is reborn and in each incarnation dies in childhood as punishment for what he did while saving his lover, Garuda. But this time he survived because he was placed under the care of the abbot of the temple, which is,in a way, his temple. And now, for a first time, Wansarat as Tharn is all grown up and delicious and the one for whom Wansart was originally intended - Dr. Bitch - he finally has a chance to get him. If it weren't for that Pesky Bird 😀

#the sign the series #thai bl #bl drama

[ghostradiodylan]

Do you have any headcanons for how the hacketteers would deal with being sick? Maybe how often they get sick, what type of illnesses they are prone to, etc….

Way behind on Quarry asks but I am home sick with some kind of crud right now so what better time to answer this one?!

Emma - Emma is a people person and always on the go, so she's exposed to a lot of germs. I feel like she'd be the one to get into juicing and making smoothies for immune health and the 'sexy' supplements like Moon Juice or whatever Gwyneth Paltrow is selling (but nobody’s sure if she really buys into them or if she’s just trying to get a sponsorship). Emma has a system for any kind of normal illness that doesn't completely knock her on her ass and that is to take a very hot bath with peppermint and eucalyptus bath salts and drink a hot toddy while she's in there. (Just the one, she doesn't want to drown!)

Jacob - This guy gets the dreaded Man Cold and is the sickest person who has ever lived. He doesn't get sick often because he's fairly health conscious, but he's absolutely pathetic and mopey about it when he does. He wants to be babied because his perfect male specimen of a body and extensive supplement regimen have betrayed him. He hates going to the doctor and puts it off until someone makes him go. Kaitlyn brings him soup and yells at him (affectionately) to stop being pathetic. He drinks a ton of Gatorade when he's sick (always Cool Blue flavor).

Kaitlyn - Look, Kaitlyn's Asian and her family was wearing masks during cold and flu season long before it was cool. She doesn't totally buy into the traditional Chinese medicine stuff but she does believe in the healing power of food that's spicy as fuck, especially if she's having sinus issues. She's also a fan of long, hot baths or showers, chicken soup with a ton of garlic, drinking a bunch of tea with lemon and ginger, the sauna at the gym, exercising even if she doesn't feel like it, hot yoga, and acupuncture. If that doesn't knock it out, she's not too stubborn to go to the doctor, people like that (who have insurance but don’t use it) drive her crazy (Jacob!).

Abi - If something is going around, Abi just knows she's going to get it. She’s a worrier and a bit of a catastrophizer when she does get sick. She's a hand sanitizer addict, she's got those cute sparkly holders from Bath & Body Works (but she uses the Halloween ones all year). She's good about letting herself take time to rest and get her strength back after an illness though. She likes to catch up on trash TV while she's recuperating. She also gets allergy shots because her environmental allergies are insane. She uses a neti pot or saline spray often to ward off sinus infections.

Ryan - Our stoic boy is stoic. Ryan takes all the necessary precautions to not get sick, he's kind of an obsessive hand-washer for sensory reasons anyway, but when he does, he follows doctors' recommendations to the letter and rarely complains. He will typically muddle through like normal if he's not got something contagious, but if he has to take time off work or school, he doesn't really talk about it or look to be cared for, just holes up in his room alone trying to not spread it around--he is very conscientious. Ryan gets the occasional migraine and that's one thing he can't really muddle through. He has to be in a quiet, dark room to recover, with an ice pack on his head, a caffeinated beverage, and a guided meditation podcast.

Dylan - People love to make our boy a damsel in distress because he's a cute gay string bean that bad things happen to, but Dylan is pretty tough in the game (like, unrealistically tough at times). I tend to consider his amputee arc as main canon, so given the assumption that he doesn't die of sepsis after surviving werewolves, he's got to have a pretty robust immune system and probably doesn't get sick that often. He does have that whole under-react/overreact thing going on though (the air freshener lol), so I imagine that when he does get sick, he either just carries on until he physically can't anymore (he'd wear a mask and get vaccinated and all that good stuff, he's a scientist after all, but he’s bad about making sure he gets rest) OR he starts Googling his symptoms and getting paranoid, convinced he has some rare incurable disease (he doesn't). He also doesn't really like to slow down and let people take care of him but when they really insist, he not-so-secretly loves the attention, from his mom, his boyfriend, his roommate/bestie, whoever.

Nick - Nick turns into a slimy wet sex pest whenever he gets sick. No, I’m kidding. I think it’d be funny/ironic/unfortunate if chef Nick had kind of a sensitive digestive system. He will eat anything, especially if Jacob is eating it. But, alas, Jacob has an iron stomach and our poor Nicholas does not. So he gets a lot of tummy troubles from doing things like eating 20 year old snacks or trying to go head to head with Jacob and Kaitlyn in a spicy ramen challenge. Nick gets sick a regular amount with stuff like head colds and is just kind of middle of the road as far as how he handles it. He does however have a habit of making up untrue facts about Australia that he tells his coworkers and campers when no one has the internet available to fact check him and one of them is that a steaming mug of hot pickle juice is a favorite folk remedy for colds there.

Max - he doesn’t get sick often but he is highly accident-prone. Like, so accident-prone that his family has started calling them ‘Maxidents’ when he has a major mishap. He routinely falls off ladders, gets attacked by migratory waterfowl, trips while trying to carry more groceries than he should into the apartment, etc. Max is luckily a very good patient because he has a lot of practice. He also has a lot of ice packs in the freezer at all times.

Laura - she gets onto Max about being careful, getting enough sleep, eating healthy, etc, but Laura is a do as I say, not as I do kinda gal. She does try to be healthy and active but she’s really busy (busier than ever post-canon because she thinks she can outrun trauma if she never slows down long enough to think about it). When Laura gets sick she gets Leslie Knope sick.

Max has to put her in bed and take care of her because she will not admit she needs it until she is practically on death’s door.

#the quarry #hacketteer headcanons #sick bunny brainrot #hello beautiful anon #thanks for the ask! #belated ask answers #emma mountebank #kaitlyn ka #jacob custos #ryan erzahler #dylan lenivy #max brinly #nick furcillo #abigail blyg #laura kearney

[sapphire-weapon]

me in the shower, just tryna shave my legs and have a normal night: you know, I'm really proud of that Leon and Ada boat scene meta post that I made earlier today. the biggest problem with Ada's character has always been that, outside of RE2, we never get a peek into her actual emotions at any point. she just seems to be a Sexy Spy Robot going on autopilot. but this is like, layered and nuanced and shit. it's interesting. my brain: hey me: ... uh oh my brain: you know what's really interesting about Leon and Ada's dynamic in the Remake series? me: ... oh god what is it just say it because this razor is very sharp and I have no wiggle room for bullshit. my brain: in OG, Leon always came off as naive and even a little bit childish due to his attachment to Ada. Remake is flipping that on its head. this time around, Leon is the mature adult in the room, and Ada is the one with a naive, almost childish worldview. me: ... what, you mean the whole "Leon is more comfortable with silence than Ada is" thing? I already did that part. my brain: bitch would I have piped the fuck up if that was it my brain: no, I mean the fact that people -- even you up to this point, dumbass -- have been misinterpreting the genesis of her redemption arc. it isn't that Ada discovers that she has a moral line in the sand that she won't cross. it's not like she reunites with Leon and, out of nowhere, has the epiphany "maybe killing people is bad, actually." me: ... go on... my brain: it's that she reunites with Leon and sees what he's become and feels incredible guilt over it -- and that's probably the very first time in actual literal years she's felt guilt over anything. me: ... so she... wants to avoid feeling guilty again...? is that what you're saying? my brain: yes, and the reason it's been so long since she's felt guilty about anything is because she doesn't ever ask why. she has no real sense of object permanence when it comes to what she's doing and who she's doing it for. she does her job and she shuts up and moves on to the next. it's an almost child-like mentality of "I just do what I'm told." and that's why Wesker is surprised to hear her ask for more information. when he says "I do not pay you to ask questions" it sounds like the very first time he's ever had to say that to her. ever. me: back up. how do you get from "feeling guilt over what happened to Leon" to "she's never questioned Wesker"??? my brain: Ada is extremely intelligent and, as a spy, curious and investigative by nature. if you think about how completely bewildered she was by Leon's change in attitude and demeanor, it only makes sense that she'd have a moment of "how the hell did this happen" followed up by the question of "what's driving him to fight so damn hard for a government that did what they did to him?" with the found answer that Cid gives Benedikta about Clive: "he's fighting for something he believes in." it's not about the government. it's about stopping something like what happened in Raccoon City from ever happening again. which then culminates in the thought: "why am I doing any of the things I'm doing? where are my efforts going, exactly? I guess I can just ask Wesker about it." me: holy shit me: you're right, it's not about drawing a moral line in the sand at all. that moral line has always been there. she just had no idea how close up on it she actually was. my brain: exactly. if not for her guilt over Leon, she would have never been inspired to ask Wesker what he plans on doing with the amber -- so, he would have never told her, and she would've handed it right over to him and been responsible for the deaths of billions. Ada is essentially learning for the very first time that her actions have consequences, like a toddler sticking a penny in a light socket. me: aight aight I feel u. but one thing to tack on: it's also probably not just Leon's influence at play here. there's probably something of Luis here, too. my brain: OH COOL I CAN MAKE IT EVEN WORSE THEN me: gODDAMN IT NO

#resident evil 4 #ada wong #leon kennedy

[forever-rogue]

hi P 🥺 i was wondering if you could write some soft sunday morning fluff for Frankie? like pure domesticity, waking up together and making breakfast together and eating it outside to enjoy the early sunlight, idk i just miss him sm. i love your fics so much

AN | You can have whatever you like bb, we want some best boyfriend Frankie? You get some best boyfriend Frankie! 🥰

Pairing | Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Warnings | Language

Word Count | 1.9k

Masterlist | Frankie, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You couldn’t have asked for a better morning. You were currently tucked under your big, warm duvet with your heater of a boyfriend next to you, his arm draped around your waist. You’d left the window open the night before, letting in the cool air which had turned into a light, early morning drizzle. It was the perfect contrast to the warmth you were enveloped in. 

It was getting later into the morning, but the sky was cloudy and gray. Fall was slowly turning into winter, and more and more days were filled with your favorite weather. Frankie insisted that you liked it because it was perfect cuddle weather and gave you an excuse to cuddle him even more than normal. You loved it for many reasons, but you couldn’t lie - that was definitely a compelling enough reason. 

You could feel his warm breath against your back as he snored lightly. It was nice to have him like this, able to rest and relax and not have to worry about anything. If it was possible, you would have stayed like this forever; there was no better place than in his arms. You took his hand in yours, slowly lacing your fingers together and held them against your chest. He made a small sound but didn’t move, which only caused you to smile. There was no need to get up just yet, no urgent or pressing matters that needed to be attended to, so you allowed yourself to drift back to sleep. Just a little bit longer in your lover’s arms sounded perfect. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You woke up to gentle, soft kisses behind pressed to your cheeks which made you smile from the tickleness from his stubble. You cracked an eye open and found him leaning over you with a gentle expression on his face. You reached up and touched his face, gently stroking over his cheek, “good morning, little honey bee.”

“Good morning, my love,” you shifted so you were sitting up, and slowly kissed him, causing him to lean into your touch and sigh wistfully, “how long have you been up?”

“Not long,” he admitted with a sheepish smile, “just watching you and couldn’t help myself.”

“Watching me?” you teased with an eyebrow raised, “I don’t think there’s anything even remotely appealing about watching me snore and drool.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” he insisted as you just giggled at his silliness. You were an absolute sucker for this silly, dopey, goofball of a sweetheart of a man, “you are incredibly sexy no matter what. Even if you sound like you’re sawing logs when you snore.”

“Francisco!”

“I’m kidding,” he laid back down as you gently pushed his chest before pulling you on top of him, “it’s not that bad. I can tune it out with ear plugs.”

“Frankie Morales, you’re the worst,” you took his hands in yours before tilting your head down so you could nudge your nose against his, “and I am so in love with you.”

“How funny,” he caught your eye and smiled softly, “I happen to be very in love with you.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Something smells delicious,” you padded into the kitchen, grinning from ear to ear as you spotted Frankie in the kitchen, leaning against the counter as he watched something cooking while scrolling through something on his phone. He looked up and his expression faltered for a second before it softened. You’d just taken a shower, hair still damp, and you’d pulled on one of his shirts and a pair of boxers, “Frankie?”

“How do you manage to look a million times better in my clothes than I do?” he asked as you dramatically rolled your eyes before walking over to him. He set down his phone before wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing the crown of your head, “hi.”

“Hi,” you replied softly, “just so you know, you always look super fuckin’ sexy to me."

"Flattery will get you nowhere," you spied the bit of red creeping into his cheeks. You ghosted your fingers along his jaw, gently scratching at his patchy beard. His fingers wrapped around your wrist and he slowly brought your hand to his mouth and pressed a kiss to your knuckles.

"Flattery will get me everywhere," you winked before patting his cheek, "don't act like it suddenly won't."

"Baby-"

"What can I help with?" you looked at the small stack of pancakes he'd made. He tutted lightly and put his hands on your waist as he gently maneuvered you out of his way, "Frankie!"

Without another word he easily set you on the counter, and you let out a small sound of surprise. You shook your head in amusement, "I can handle it. Besides, there's not much left to do."

"Which I can do-"

"Nope," he popped the p, but you could see the amusement on his face, "let me take care of my girl, huh?"

"When you put it like that, how could I possibly say no?" you swung your legs back and forth lightly before you tugged on his arm and pulled him back to your lips. You kissed him softly, which only caused him to blush harder, "I love you."

"I love you," he grinned, that boyish expression on his face, "how does my girl want her eggs?"

"Hmmm…surprise me?"

"One surprise coming right up!"

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"I don't think I can move," you put down your fork after swallowing your last bite of pancakes. You leaned back and let out a long groan, "I ate way too much but it was all worth it."

"Me too," he agreed, catching your eye before the two of you shared a giggle, "I don't even want to think about cleaning up and doing the dishes."

"I don't think we should think about it all," you agreed, "that sounds like something that could wait until later. Like until we need the kitchen for dinner later."

"I like the way you think," he grinned, "I knew I fell in love with you for good reason. Beautiful and smart. But I'm going to suggest something even better."

"Oh? Do go on."

"How about we get a fire going and then just…lay on the couch and watch some Netflix?"

"Now that sounds like a perfect afternoon. But the real question is - will there be cuddles and kisses?” you batted your lashes at him and offered up the best doe eyes you could manage. You knew neither were necessary to get what you wanted, but you liked doing it nonetheless; you knew it was his weakness.

“There will be cuddles and kisses,” he crooked his finger at you as he leaned, and you followed suit, “there will even be some making out and inappropriate touching.”

“You really know how to win a girl over, Morales. I’d be a fool to turn you down,” you leaned in just a little and quickly pressed your lips to his. You could still taste the faint bits of syrup and fruity sweetness clinging to his plush lips, which just caused you to grin at him, “you’re a true romantic.”

“‘course I am,” he slowly stood up and wiped his hands before coming around to your side of the table and offering you his hand, “how else would I have gotten you to agree to go out with me?”

“Hmm,” you mused, “I mean…to be fair we met in a bar when we were drunk and had a one night stand. It just happened to work out for us, baby.”

“Because I’m a true romantic,” he insisted as you sighed in amusement, “come on, we have to get a start on our lazy afternoon of cuddles!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Just as you had opened the window the evening before, you likely cracked some of the windows in the living room while Frankie started the fire. It would just be enough to bring in some fresh air along with the cozy comfort of the crackling fire. After pulling some of the fluffiest and softest blankets on the couch you made yourself comfortable on the couch and motioned for Frankie to join you. He grabbed the remote before quickly getting into your little blanket cocoon, lying down and stretching across the couch, resting in between your legs with his head on your stomach. Out of habit, you reached down and started playing with his soft hair. His eyes instantly closed and he made a small, happy little sound in the back of his throat. 

“What do you want to watch?” he asked as he started flicking through netflix, scrolling through the saved list, “horror, comedy, drama, romance, a combination of all of the above?”

“Okay but what movies combine all of those?” you snorted in amusement; you could tell he was trying to think of something just so he could tease you.

“I mean technically, you could consider Star Wars to fit…it’d be a stretch on the drama but Darth Vader can be pretty intimidating,” you immediately dissolved into a fit of giggles, “don’t laugh! Do you remember the hallway scene at the end of Rogue One? Pure horror!”

“Fine, fine, fine Morales, I’ll give you this one,” he turned his head so he was looking up at you, “but perhaps not today. How about a comedy or something? That way in case we fall asleep-”

“Or end up getting a little too handsy!”

“In case we fall asleep or you lack any self control, my love,” you teased, “we won’t be missing too much if it’s comedy.”

“Smart girl,” he agreed, “let’s do that. I make no promises or guarantees on not falling asleep though. You are a very comfortable pillow.”

“I do take my job very seriously,” you promised, “I would do anything for the best boyfriend ever. Best boyfriend Frankie.”

“Best girlfriend Bee,” he whispered through a yawn, the large breakfast and cloudy weather already getting to him. You couldn’t help but yawn in response which caused him to shake in silent laughter, “umm…I think it’s naptime for me.”

“I’m absolutely going to be joining you,” you pulled the blanket tighter around the both of you, “I love you so much, Frankie.”

“I love you so much and more, Honey Bee.”

#frankie morales #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x fem!reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader

[realbeefman]

Angus loyal follower here I love your posts I actually started reading hilson fic because of you even though I’ve never seen the show and I never will because once I heard Hugh lauries voice in a fancam and it was so unsexy also they filmed a lot of b roll at my school anyway Seeing your destiel post was so surprising to me please tell me more about your spn opinions I’m so curious I love discourse <3

very long answer so i’ve hidden it under a readmore for the sanity of casual dash scrollers and people who dont care

first off his american voice or his british voice? this is kind of controversial and may seem wild considering i spend a solid chunk of time thinking about what house would be like during sex but i ACTUALLY find him deeply unattractive. i’d love to have his face and wear his skin but never in my life would i consider him a sexual being. he’s too british for it. the only way british people can be sexy is if they are women this is my most political belief on foreign policy. however i do think hugh laurie’s AMERICAN voice is actually very normal and makes him very endearing to me. hilson fic is awesome but honestly!!! most hilson fic for me just does not hit the same unless u can visualize the creepiness with which house looks at wilson. it’s genuinely sickening. he talks about wilson in the softest voice. so many of the most iconic lines in the show just dont HIT the same if u dont listen to the way they’re delivered.

that is SO cool that they shot b roll at ur school though!!! honestly seems like a dream. if i knew i had walked the same halls the house film team had i think i would die. the camerawork on that show is just fucking PHENOMENAL. i could write entire essays fangirling over how they shoot certain scenes but i fear that would be chronically desperately boring

oh man my supernatural opinions… first off disclaimer i have not seen supernatural recently because i am a deeply paranoid individual and prone to delusions and when i first watched the show i genuinely convinced myself that the monsters were real so. i think my most controversial spn opinion would have to be that it’s a PSYCHOLOGICAL THREAT. have you ever met a normal supernatural fan? NOBODY HAS. BECAUSE THE SHOW DRIVES PEOPLE NUTS

other than that my opinions are pretty normal i thiunk. i actually dont have anything at all against destiel even though i am solidly on the wincestie side of fandom. i dont care for the ship and i think it sucks but OBJECTIVELY its a good ship and has strong canon support. i think my hatred comes because i have read SO many destiel fics and have yet to come across a genuinely good one that accurately portrays the characters. i dont understand why an objectively reasonable ship with strong canon support has created some of the middest fic ive ever read in my life. genuinely fascinating. it’s not even that the fic itself is not good or entertaining it just doesn’t feel anything like the actual canon dean and castiel! i have read like two genuinely entertaining destiel fics that felt realistic and BOTH were from authors who primarily write samdean so!!

other controversial spn opinions i have. the “chuck is god” stuff is by far the most entertaining late seasons retcon. objectively ridiculous but so goddamn amusing. i think season 8 and the leviathans was the peak of supernatural. by far the best season in my opinion. plotwise it was not the most believable but i strongly believe that what makes a story good is not it’s logical soundness nor it’s objective value but whether it is ENTERTAINING and COMPELLING and by god the leviathans were both of those things. what a season. also benny and dean were having sex. i loved castiel going insane. OH and i think endverse spn is overhyped both as an episode and in fanon! i did not understand what endverse referred to for so long because i couldnt comprehend that SO MANY PEOPLE could possibly by THAT fanatic over a very mid episode.

not a controversial opinion but rowena is hot. she should've been in every episode for this reason alone. last semester i set up an office meeting with my professor who looked JUST like her to shoot my shot and she literally died before the meeting could happen. i've always felt in my heart that these are related.

#ty for the ask dearest!! much to chew on and think about #house md #supernatural #ask #cw incest mention

[scoopertrouper]

this is not a prompt, just a regular question for you to answer; have you ever entertained some AU's for stancy in your head? (besides the spiderman one which sounds so cool btw)

the spider-man AU is one of those ideas that is so cool and so perfect that I WISH it were mine. there are SO many things you could do with it, and kudos to @slashergirlnancy for having the galaxy brain necessary to bring it to life in gifs.

but otherwise, in terms of stancy AUs, it’s funny. normally I’m all about that life, but for whatever reason, all the layers of Steve and Nancy’s current canon story are supplying enough fuel to keep a thousand creative fires burning. the emotional progression and second chance romance of it all are THAT good.

that said, there is one idea that is near and dear to my heart (I sometimes think it might be the only thing that could compel me to give multi-chapters another shot). it’s actually barely an AU at all, at least not at this point in time (tho it almost certainly would be once s5 is wrapped).

basically i have this really clear vision in my head of a Steve and Nancy who, for whatever reason, missed their second chance while they were still teenagers and, in a funny little twist of fate, end up reuniting 5-10 years down the line in a new city, once they’ve had a chance to live a little and grow into their own skins.

maybe i am showing my age in a big, big way, but there is something very sexy to me about, idk, the ordinariness of two adults coming together once they’ve settled into their careers and homes and everyday lives. they go to the gym and cook themselves dinner and can buy their own alcohol, and now they’re just waiting to see if this one last thing slots into place, should they ever meet (or re-meet!) the right person.

(don’t get me wrong, writing about angsty teenagers is fun, but it’s also kind of hard when you have to think of 3,000 excuses to explain why their parents wouldn’t be questioning 110% of what they’re doing. unless, you know, it’s Steve. 🥲)

also in this AU i think steve is a firefighter. just for, you know…reasons. and nancy is obv the star reporter no matter which universe we’re inhabiting. and robin is a little more out and proud and very into the alt rock scene. she has her own place but mostly hangs out at Steve’s and drags him to underground shows on school nights and listens to more Garbage than he can stand, usually.

so yes anyway anon i am sorry for describing literally the most boring possible AU that i may write someday if i can find a way to make it interesting outside my own head. but that is what it is lol.

#stancy #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #robin buckley #anon reply #my stuff

[g-l-o-w-y-l-i-g-h-t-s]

Tag yourself, Dracula (novel) characters edition:

Arthur:

Would die for his gf

Abraham Van Helsing:

PhD. Md. Esqu. Fuck. you.

Nobody is sure wtf he's talking about

Schlemiel

Let's talk about corn 🌽

Constantly spewing ominous vague shit

I'll get over it I just have to cry about it first

Will trust one (1) person with his problems and only even that if he's reached a complete breakdown

Will quote absolute bullshit at you as if it is proven fact

"Parrots can't die. I'm an expert."

Currently in a foreign country

Would commit a crime

Genre savvy

Mr Swales:

Death is inevitable 😊

Incomprehensible speech

Renfield:

Weird diet

An outlier

Clingy

Eldritch princess

Ambitious

🥺🥺🥺🥺

Should not be allowed to have a cat

Cleans by just eating the mess

Eats a lot of meat

You can control him by giving him food

Probably a sub

Mentally ill

Lucy:

Polyam

Hot Girl Summer

Voluptuous

Miiiiight have eaten somebody

Quincy Morris:

Cowboy! 🤠

Infinite Swag

Can handle the wackest situations perfectly

Hottie

Has a gun

The Wyrd Sisters:

Read (3:21 pm)

Seward:

Desperate

Owns/runs a lunatic asylum

$$$

At least he's pretty

Straight A student

Least cool guy you've ever met

Mad scientist

Podcaster

Wtf is even happening rn

Something is Very Wrong with this man

schlimazel

Desperately needs a Nap. Exhausted

Down bad for Quincy Morris

Very proud of himself for having a thought that will almost be a whole idea any day now

"there must be a reasonable explanation"

Undiagnosed mental illness

Needs his comfort items

Needs validation so bad

Ableist af

Keeps a diary

Mina:

Loves her significant other so fuckimg much

Journals

Homoerotic best-friendship times!! ❣️

Knows her partner better than anyone

My best friend is soooooo pretty and funny and cool

Goth

Protective

Repressed bisexuality

Repressed in general

Romantic ASF

Same taste as Dracula

Has read Dracula

Owner of all the Team Braincells(tm)

Says shit like "Everyone loves me" and she's right

Gets shit done

Secretary and the whole operation would probably collapse without her

Dealing with sexism

Gets left out

Feral devotion to her partner

Traumatized

Special interest in trains

Train fiend!

Girlboss

Dislikes garlic ever since the incident

Dracula:

"please assume I am normal"

Lizard fashion

"I PROMISE I'm normal"

Teaboo

Cooks for his friends

"I am so normal"

Graveful and elegant in public but as soon as you look away he has to do 19828291 things to maintain his image before anyone notices

So many red flags

Likes bearded men

Will just grab something from you and yeet it away

Fucked up little guy

Rock/Wall climbing expert

Wants to be liked so bad

Fraudster

Identity theft

Unhinged

Very effective beauty routine

Did not think this through

Cannot pace himself

Does fucked up horrendous shit just for the fuck of it/to fuck with people

Terrible/non-existent decision making skills

"Anything is free if they don't catch you stealing"

Grumpy idiot

Same taste as Mina

Hairy

Self obsessed

Will do anything for meat

Hates garlic

Edgelord

Cringefail

Gives up immediately

"If I avoid the problem long enough it will go away "

Ugly/can't make that hat work for him

$$$$

Jonathan Harker:

White boy - has spices for the first time and it affects him like drugs

Never shuts up about food

"Ridiculous but also uncomfortable"

British (derogatory)

Red flags are so sexy to him

Wife guy!!

Going through it!!

Logical

Doing his best not to get murdered but it is a Task

Everyone wants him

Racist 😕

Someone please help him

"Not again"-his response to the wildest shit you've ever seen happen

Will hit a bitch with a shovel

Badass survival horror protagonist

Loves his wife!

The Horrors are neverending

Cinnamon roll

Mentally ill but refuses to fully acknowledge it

*gets money* Bribery time!

Feral rage unlocked!!!

White hair early from stress

#im mr swales tbh

[stampgwifeyera]

Wolfpire introduction/timeline:

Introduction:

Uhhhhh idk how to introduce things i barely got a C in english but the idea behind wolfpire is like a dark fantasy au of community. the big changes are:

This all takes place in and around Aberystwyth(A-buh-rist-wuth),wales because I'm welsh and also america perplexes me.

Troy is now a werewolf,he lives in his family's pack (it's like a small village in the countryside) after his mom died he was made the leader against his will by his dad since he wanted Troy to grow up faster and become more responsible. Oh and troys ftm now because ik him better then harmon.(also ill be referring to younger troy as troy i wont be giving him a deadname or anything like that because i think thats kinda weird tbh)

Abed is a half vampire, his mom is a human and his dad is a vampire,his mom left (i've said before that she died but i’m changing that) due to similar reasons in the show, abed was always alone since he was home-schooled (as a protective measure), and since he couldn't go to the movies (overstimulation makes it impossible to hide his vampiric side) abed reads screenplays and re-enacts/draws scenes he thinks would be cool. also Since he didn't go to Greendale he instead works at his dads cafe which doubles as a normal cafe but also has a V.I.P area for any other monsters in town who need a place to go and don't need to hide themselves.

Annie wasn't able to go to rehab due to her parents, she's constantly tired from all nighters she has to pull for her straight A+’s (or else her parents will kick her out) it doesn't help that she doesn't have a study group to help her.

Other characters pending….

Greendale community college is now ‘greendale paranormal investigators’ a (not so successful) agency that investigates,documents and “takes care of” any paranormal/supernatural activity, it also has a trainee/apprenticeship program.

My best attempt at a timeline of events(this'll be short for now because i don't have too many events “planned” in my head):

Troy and abed first met when they're younger like 5-7, Abed was in his backyard re-enacting a scene from a screenplay with some pebble/rock statues he made, when troy who got lost on a field trip with his family and found abed playing in his backyard and got excited to see another kid his age so he jumped into his backyard and thats when they first met, they talked for hours and hours troy was happy to finally have a person who didn't judge or criticize him and abed was happy to have someone to talk to who wasn't “too busy” to listen to him. I also feel like abed did that speech thing with jeff in ep1 but with troy.

Periodically when he can troy would sneak away and visit abed at least once a week after a while abed starts baking snacks he thinks troy will like, introducing him to Gobi who was worried for troy but also happy that his son had someone to talk and specificity looking for screenplays he knows troy will like so they can re-enact them together. After about 5-6months of this happening though abed notices that troys coming less and less and eventually he stops coming at all… Yeah thats kinda it  😅 i don't actually have much of any other ideas bouncing strong enough around my head sadly :(  if you cant tell already this is still a very massive work in progress.

Where the idea came from:

basically back in October i got a an idea after watching Danny in dywtsadb and wanted to relate that to community so i made abed a vampire (instead of a cannibal but i mean those are basically the same anyway) and i also wanted troy to be a sexy monster but i didn't want him to also be a vamp and the next thing my brain thought of was a werewolf, i feel like that tells you a lot about who i am as a person. link to google doc with all this

#community tv #au #abed nadir #trobed #troy barnes #wolfpire #gay people #wolfpiretrobed #this is being made at 3:30am so idk i mightve made some oopsies idk

[badstargateimagines]

I don’t know if you take requests for anything but I loved your post of the skincare/makeup products the Stargate characters would use and I need to know….what perfume/cologne do you think they would wear? Or types of scents that they’d be into? (Btw love your imagines)

Yay!!! I’m so glad you like my stuff!! Also yessss I do take requests and I would love an excuse to talk about fragrance! My credentials are I worked at Sephora for a year and a half and I spent a lot of time on the frag wall huffing every single bottle. As a general thing I’m very obsessed w genderless, warm spicy scents so that will be reflected in this post.

Jack: By The Fireplace by Replica was my gut reflex for Jack as soon as I saw this ask. I think he’d really love the woody notes and I think he’d also like it because he has the vibes of someone who smells like a campfire in general. A quick side note, I don’t think he’d wear fragrance too much and I think Normally he would smell like Gillette shaving cream. Also heads up, Replica will be over represented on this list because I love all their frags

Sam: not a perfume by Juliette has a gun. One of my personal favourite frags bc it has no base scent really it j mixes w ur body’s natural PH. I think she’d like it because it’s entirely unique to her and also because the brand name Juliette has a gun totally speaks to her

Daniel: Either Jazz Club or Coffee Break both by replica. I really think he’d go for a heavy musky scent as frags like that tend to be both timeless and classy. I think he’s definitely the type to consider names when he buys frags too, so these town seem perfect for him. Also as I’m writing this I am HUFFING Jazz Club like I’m fucking Jeremy Fragrance.

Teal’c: I desperately want him to smell like Carbon by Prada. I think he’d be super into the earthy scents but not the warm earthy. Just a nice cool kind of scent but still heavy. Overall, idk if Teal’c would be 100% into frags but this is my vision.

Janet: Chanel #5 100%. I think Janet would in general go for a light, barely there scent. It’s for that reason that I think she’d go for an eau de toilette as opposed to a full on perfume bc I think she would want it to wear off a bit quicker than normal in case she gets called into work (I’d imagine the infirmary is a scent free environment)

Jonas: THIS MAN HAS 1 MILLION FOR THE MEME!!!! I don’t think he cares about notes or anything I genuinely think that he saw a bar of gold on the Jeremy Fragrance “SEXY SWEET YUMMY” clip and just added it to cart lmao

Vala: when I first saw this ask I had so many ideas for vala that I think she would just be a fragrance addict. Like obviously Black Opium crossed my mind bc I do really think she’d like a heavier scent BUT I also thought about Miss Dior for a bit of a softer more floral moment. Then, I immediately was brought to Burberry Her for a more fruity floral. And, obviously, because she’s Vala, she would 1000% have a vast collection of Victoria’s Secret body sprays. Anyway I think she would have YSL Black Opium as her signature scent but she would be at Sephora every other weekend trying out a new roller ball.

Cam: Dior Sauvage enjoyer and not because he likes it but because it’s what he was told he should like. If I were to pick a fragrance for him, I would stay away from the warmer scents and actually go for something a bit lighter and fresher. I would probably steer him towards Gentleman by Givenchy bc I really think of him as more of a fresh and clean kind of guy as opposed to such a heavy and smell-him-before-you-see-him Sauvage type of guy. Idk I think Cam would walk into my Sephora I would also guide him to Sailing Day by Replica for that fresh goodness.

General Hammond: Tom Ford Noir Extreme. Not only can he afford it but I think he’d really like Tom Ford as a brand. General Hammond seems like he’d go for more earthy and woody scents that can air on the side of overwhelming. Also he seems like he’d like sandalwood but not know it’s called sandalwood. Unrelated I think he’d be a really good client at Sephora and we’d all love helping him. He would have a beauty insider account so he can get points for his grand daughters.

Apophis: Dior Sauvage (Derogatory). Look, to my core I am a hater towards this frag. Everything about it gives me the ick. I knew what Sauvage clients were like in the store and I knew men who wore Sauvage everyday. They were both unpleasant groups of people who bought it because Johnny Depp was the face of the line. Obviously this is a perfect pick for Apophis.

#stargate #stargate sg1 #sg1 #bad stargate imagines #daniel jackson #jack o’neill #teal'c #sam carter #jonas quinn #vala mal doran #cam mitchell #general hammond #janet fraiser #badstargatereplies

[the-official-account]

I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THERE'S A NEW EPISODE HERE'S 26 LIVEBLOG BABEEEEYYYY

my podcatcher is cool and great and open source and ad free and all that shit but I haven't set up my notifications good and because this is my first episode as they come out (my inner fanatic is all grown up) im not used to the schedule but HHHASD;LPIG AHIP'LSF AG THE WAY I SCREEEEEAMED AND ACTUALLY DANCED FOR JOY HERE WE GO!!!!!

oh opening music my beloved. Oh shit I got so obsessed with Blorbos I briefly forgot exactly where we are in the story. Coping mechanism (slash joking slash lighthearted) im 👀👀👀👀 very hyped bery concerned

"you need to be making eye contact to be frozen" means it's vry easy to free spar!!! ahhh so they somehow duplicated the pendants....or found more??

BACKUP THINGS 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 IM ON DESKTOP AND I CAN ONLY HAVE ONE EMOJI COPIED TO MY CLIPBOARD AT AT TIME ASJKDLHFASDFH

also the title of this episode is making me excited

Ila's stress about spar's condition is such a mood

THIS TELEKENISIS NECKLACE THING IS SO BANGER.

ooh. oof. this drive. CRIT?????? NICE FUCK. WHEW.

SUUCESSED THE FUCK OUTA THAT.

Voracity fucking sucks sorry about your lineage bestie i do hope you die though

SPAR BALANCED HALWAYD ON A CATWALK, FROZEN, SNUGGLED UP TO AN AWFUL AWFUL VAMPIRIC ASSHOLE UHHHH

......that joker.

OH I FORGOT VELLUM CAN TELEPORT FOR A SEC with the power of looking INCREDIBLY sexy. I like this plan I'm feeling good about this plan

Jordan's clearly plotting some shit and i am HERE for it

"normally you are not conscious during it" NORMALLY???

Spar depersonalization crash course. OH WAIT NO SPAR STEVEN UNIVERSE MOMENTS. IM OBSESSED????

viscious spar.....hmmm......im making a face it's not a great face LASDFALHFAHS

I love that spar's first thing is to just get the gist of what he's got going on <3 LJSADFLKJAHSDJFKHASD HE GOES TO VELLUM A;LKSDFLJSHDFLJSADGFLJSHADFKAHSDFKLASDF SCOOBY DOO ASS LOVE BIRDS

Oh shit is Vellum gonna think spar is fucking dead???? VORACITY GOES TOPPLING WHICH IS HILARIOUS BUT SPAR TOO??????? HOLY SHIT????? LMAO????

we are thirteen minutes in.

IF YOU DIE IN YOUR BODY YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE ALKSDJF;LAKSDJFASKLD;FJALSDFJ

Essay protesting Voracity's stats is such a mood. What if...what if ya jus didn???

As spooky as this whole situation is, the mental image of spar having royallllly biffed it is sending me

Okay when I was very young, I used to play chess with a younger sibling of mine. And I did this thing where I would just take one rook and systematically go around capturing all their pawns because they didn't know how to protect them, while just kinda giggling. And that's the energy ipswitch is bringing right now, tkaing out all their backup.

EIGHT FUCKING CARDS

AD;ISFLG;ALKDSGASLDFK RING TOSS SITIONATION wasn't jakub with ipswitch? or going to him? and yeahhhh lunevella is an important ally.

Diamond? friend? mmmmmmmmmmmmnahhhh

YEAH LUNAVELLA!!!! MASSIVE WITCH LADY COME IN CLUTCH!

nooo fuck PLEASE dont make it diamond please please please LUNEVELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA lesbiamb...YEAS

I forget what beloved does but mechanical nonsense is my favorite

NO SUCESSES ONE JOKER there are not emojis on this computer that describe...you know that one image of the hot cook guy from Queer eye looking traumatized? that.

"I'm having fun being a useless ghost boy" VALID i am also having fun. sometimes in a ttrpg you just wanna be/add to the problem for a bit!!! And that's ok

Voracity being pissed about being launched off the catwalk is SO Funny.

"so I could accomplish my goal without violence" BITCH YOU THREATENED TO MURDER SEVREAL-----FJHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NO NO NO VORACITY ISNT ALLOWED TO CRIT LEAVE VELLUM ALOOOOOOOONE!!!!!!!!!

oh shit but vellum's turn now.......kick them back off!!!!!! asjdhfakjsdhfasdkflakdhf

TAEKWONDO!! switching instantly for a drive does seem like a good balance I like that mechanic

god I love my gay rule-abiding detectives who for some reason keep trying to fight the ONE being that EVERY rule is like don't fucking fight for the love of god do not fight them for the LOVE OF

"I imagine that vellum gets a cat stance, which is like an L stance" i know there is more informaiton here but my brain has already shifted into the "someone i know is talking about something they love and i understand very little of what's happening here but I'm just excited to listen" mode. But no i do need to know what cat stance is because this is so art in my brain. ill look it up later.

im so *chinhands*

OOOOOH BUT THIS DESCRIPTION IS SO GOOD i CAN SEE IT IN MY BRAIN SO WELL OOOOHAS;DFHKLASEHFASKDFHA VELLUM IS SO COOL

there are no ascii emojis for doing a silly stupid little happy stim but that's what's happening

oh shit luna can fly!

Lune deserves to be condescending to her enemies, she's dealt with so much bullshit.

Ooof we have the AA and now the bramble guard with MOTORCYCLES????? ugh!!! organizations!!!!! Lore!!!!!!!! im swooning. there is nothing sexier in my mind that good worldbuilding

tatiana related plans but not htis episode 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀????

yeah lmao fuck diamond.

okay but in my brain Desdemona was suuuuuuper pretty. Oh no!!! Don't make her endearing!!!!!!!

(sweetly) "So uhhh, people of cindershore as you can see....we have the people of theee passion fruit festival held hostage <3"

THEY WANTED TO DO THIS NON VIOLENTLY god fuck i hate fucking misinformation goddamn.

"side with crystallis of againse you own wellbeing" bestie how is that fucking nonviolent?????

"get your gummy jello fingies in here" hello i am uncomfortablleeee AHSDL;FHASDFHADJSFLHAKDSFJH

TERRORIST TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

I like to imagine that Kit's comments was ipswitch being genuinely helpful

oh god. there was a SPLIT second moment when my entirely world lit up with the GLEE that was Voracity biffing it off the catwalk again.

vellum pulls them...up? NOOO I MEAN THATS SMART BUT AHHHHH IM STAKING THE PROTAGONISTS LIKE A MIRACA (how the FUCK do you spell this im pretty sure i knew that) STOP PUTTING YOURSELF IN HARMS WAY AHHHHHHHHHH

i swear to GOD the host have an uncanny ability to say the joke i was thinking and I think we've just all got the same internet brain rot. my FIRST thought here was "None successes? left beef." and there we go. no funny left for the rest of us.

oooh what's jakub up to

WITCH TIME WITCH TIME WITCH TIME

"leave diamond where they are" you know, cause fuck em.

LUNA VELLA COMING IN FRIGGGGGING CLUTCH.

"Lunavella casts a spell that was taught to her by tara. Lunavella later taught it to jasper, who used it to talk to a god at a very crucial time"

the VOLUME at which i just sais "HUH?????" is IMMENSE.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? HELLP???? NO DONT MOVE ON HELLO??? HI! hIS I HAVE QUESTIONS?

Did jasper do the untethering???? Did jasper PERSONALLY speak to mommy magic???? Is that was Tara did to sacrifice her connection to magic for Merim & Josepha's freedom????? what...what does this mean....

SHE'S TALKING TO KRONOSAVA SHE CALLED THIS RELIC'S FUCKING PARENT. SHE SAID SHE'S GOING TO THE MANAGER. AJSHDFAJSHDFLKAJSHDF

An animatronic giant....HMMMMMM

okay but what is the triple threat if not just a small, minimalist mech suit?

"oh i do like information" "I know!!! Me to!!!" Oh my god they're suchhhh fucking nerds i fucking love them HASKLDJHFASDHFAKDJLFH GET ME TO A CLOSET.

AND JAKUB BLUSHES. AND OF COURSE IPSWITCH DOESN'T NOTICE CAUSE ITS IPSWITCH. THIS IS CUTE AS FUCK

I WANNA TRY TO POSSESS VORACITY Spar has been a ghost for like 2 minutes, and he was already like "When in rome!!!"

Kronosava manifests as a NINE FOOT TALL CLOCKWORK PERSON WITH MANY CLOCK FACES OF IMPOSSIBLE GEOMETRY????? COOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL FUCKING RAD RAD RAD

Spar's ALONE with the TIME GOD al;jsdflkasdjfasdjlf

he did NOT just introduce himself....holllly shit lmaooo. "those who may be frozen by my eye are unworthy by my sight" oh so Spar is like. Time daddy's favorite blorbo. This makes sense to me. or maybe somewhat.

KRONOS SAY YALL KINDA SUCK SO I MADE YA DIE, CAUSE FUCK EM

Spar is NOT fucking out logicing this GOD im So here for this. fuck em up bestie FUCK EM UP!!!!!!

imagine your last name being considered by the GOD OF TIME now that's what I call clout.

"relative innocence" yeahhhhh. peace and lvoe on the planet earth, but emphasis on "on the planet earth"

Mayor lipton is the mayor of cindershore.

Okay I understanbd this scene im loving the vibes but MERIM FELSPAR THE SECOND IS NOOOOOTTTTT THE JUSTICE SYSTEM MR. TIME DADDY!!! He can't awnser for the crime and bigroties of Extra #8 and 13

YOU MAKE A GODDEX CHUCKLE that line will be living in my brain as something that can be so symbolism

I....I...I don't like this. wow i HATE how fast spar just traded off year of his fucking life span noooooo. fuck. fuck. fuckity fuck fuck fuck im in distress. ughhhhhh spar being spar.......I will have thoughts but first I need to sigh a lot ......Ugh.

but also fuck the gods im not vibing with this barter situation. is it good for the plot YES is deicide always an aspiration of mine also yes

"it feels like licking a battery with your hand' oooh mental sensory imaginings not good but very very cool

Like sourpatch kids watermelon flavor colorscheme.

*sadly, with hesitation* midtro dance midtro dance....

guhhhh spar....Spar why. Like I understand the choice but that was SO fast. HE DIDNT THINK ABOUT IT AND THAT'S WHAT I --UGHHHHHH

happy late birthday to essay!

ESSAY PLEASE STOP ASTRALLY PROJECTING PLACES ALSDFL;ASHFDLASHDFLKASF

Spar is a snacker and habituatally hands people snacks to keep them sustained.

God yall are just begging for me to write a communion (slash literary term related to chrstian, not christian practice itself. for as much as i say the words lord and god i like barely know who jesus is) fic....soon my toils will be over and my backlog will sing so my like the sirens lulling me away from an approaching storm, so instead my hyperfixation can crash violently upon the rocks and. it. will. be. GLORIOUS.

VELLUM WON A LEETLE KEETY <3<3<3

KIT CAME OUT SWINGING WITH THIS????? ....HUH????? BESTLJHAS;DIFHASDHFASJDFALKDSFKJASF. KIT SAID "IPSWITCH LOOKS AT SOME GAY SHIT END OF SENTENCE" IM DEAD. Im just imaginging Jakub looking at the performers, and at ipswitch, and at the performers, and in his head he's like "why does he look contemplative?"

Xbala, hilde, grey, anya play shoots and ladders at the safe house while knowing Spar, Vellum, ip, Jakub, and Luna are risking their lives fighitng voracity....that was me typing for speed but "Ip" as a nickname is really cute imo.

*much more enthusiatic end of midtro dance*

ILA I DON'T THINK THAT'S GOOD NEWS. DODGE IS ONE. AH. OH NO. HHHHH.

i made i sound like ID been bitten. Voracity. Rancid bestie, what if we like....didnt...

LIASDFASDJFASDF VELLUM'S BLOOD TASTES WIERD?????

*A deep sigh as I realize by having Beloved as a ultimate Vellum is, in fact, another self-sacrificial blorbo for the lot.*

Oh fuck he's so determined and valliant but i want him to STOP.

People should be reinvigorating and spar should be around soon??? im....spoooked. I know being unconcious isn't the end of the world though....

I think some of the gumw as given to Anya and may not have ever been returned? Which i only mention as a brief note for efforts and because these eps are recorded long ahead of time: i aint a snitch

spar to the recsue <3 <3 <3 king I'm imagining spar like Baseball-sliding in, swinging the sword like he's going to a home run, in slow motion. It's VERY cool.

SPAR IS AJUDSHLKJSAHGFKLJSADFGHAS THIS IS FO FUNNY I FUCKING LOVE THIS.

OHHHHH JUST ONE SHORT.

OH. OH SHIT. OH. PLEASE FLIP GOOD OH MY GOD. ID WOULD BE SCREAMING BUT IF I START SCREAMING i CAN'T HEAR.

AHHHHH;LFRGHA jumped so hard I pulled my chair up off the floor and keysmashed irrespocibly enough to put my compter to sleep. I'm SO normal.

The Animaation of this that exists in my brain through. Vellum gets bitten and Voracity reals back enough for you to see, between their faces, spar sprinting towards them reaching for his sword. The Camera whips to a side angle for spar's baseball swing. Slice! Spray of blood as vellum gets up a bit. Shot from below spar's chin to show his determined face and the long line of his arm and Bang! Bang! They all drop until his gun clicks empty. As there's a zoom in on the bat going for the window. One last bang and as Spar looks down the Camera does too, to show Vellym propped up on one arm holding His derringer high for a beat before his arms fall when he slumps in relief and he just smiles as ash rains down around them. Spar falls to his knees, and vellum slides over to kiss him...augh. AUGH!

Spar with a subtle scar over his hear that after 26 is raised and more obvious. For you know. Eventual shiftless art that WILL happen

Oh shit Jakub's getting a fucking promotion, huh?

LKJUAHSFGKJAHSKDFAHSDFKLASD IPSWITCH FINDS TERRORISM TAX FRAUD EVIDENCE I LOOOVE THAT FOR HIM OH MY GODDD <3.

Okay but Jakub being attracted to that is SO dorky and i love them and they're such sillyy guyssss. IPSWITH STARTLES.

"i have one more thing to end on!" [the episode has twnety minutes left]

Governor thorn middle ages. violet haired. carries a spear. CLEARLY need to pack her ass up and fuck off before she messes with Hilde, Anya, Grey and Xbala. I was only gonna mention my favoirites out of that grpup but not yeah they're all good. So throne need to like. go. I don't trust this.

"What's this about? how do you know where this is?" GOOD QUESTIONS.

FUCK. OFF. UNDER ARREST FOR WHAT. BITCH?

NO. NO. YOU DONT GET TO FUCKING END CREDITS MUSIC AFTER THAT FUCK YOU. FUCK OFF. WHAT. WHAT?

What.

i HEARD KEVIN AND I ACTUALLY GASPED. ITS MY FAVORITE CRINGEFAIL KING!!!!

CATBOY ASCE!!!!!!

OH WAIT im realizing....If SUITS has been abolished that Spar did retire after all, huh? Huh. Good for not having to report info about clovenheart. BAD news for whatever the fuck is happening to jack. Interesting news for Vellum's blood theirvery theories. And damn, I just sort of assumed Mayor Thorne was just like...Good Guy(TM) until....well until chapter 3 of tempest and teapots yesterday. God i love stories where things only get bigger. crunchy as hell.

THEY HAVE TO BOTH WEAR HIS CLOTHES STACKED ASJLDFALSDJFADF

I'm in love with Asce's himbo ass, he should NOT be enabling this and YET.

Iris has jury duty and then she's getting a massage and then she's going to therapy and then doing her therapy homework: considering new employment.

DOES CASEDYWM FUCKING STICK THEM IN HIS ACTUAL POCKET??????? OH NO.

ARE THEY JUST GONNA KEEP THE PIXIES IN HIS POCKET THE WHOLE TIME?

"I just need to know whose on top and whose...whose...whose the legs" Ah, when nature denies us our low hanging fruit

oh god I hope asce is left handed because otherwise Caedyn';s hand is occupied and Asce only has access to his non dominant hand

SDLFASDFAJSDFLASDF "I DONT KNOW HOW IT HELPS BIT I WANT IT"

"IS CADEWYN'S noSE PIECED" "IT IS NOW"

ASDKJFA;LSDJFASDF FUCK

added together they look like a great mintaur, yeah!! If someone shakes their head back and forth very fast

peer pressure confusion...sweet jesus.

JSADLFJALKDSFJAS just look abnormnal and blend in!!! This stratedgy would work in many of my social circles to be fair.

Not CALHOUN (just finished reading the 1619 project, that's the last name of the probably most cartoonishly evil & racist person in that entire book. Which, if anything, makes this mor funny for me

HE GIVES CADEWYN MORE ALCOHOL. NOOOO LMAOOOOOO

A BRILLIANT TACTICAL PLAY YOU'RE NOT HIGH LEVEL ENOUGH TO GET FULL DETAILS ON.

I was gonna make a joke about xbala getting arrested in the background but then it hit me: anya is a defense lawyer. A defense lawywer who already fucking hates Thorn. A defense lawyer who already hates thorn who has made up with spar and befriended Xbala and in all likelyhood has the support of the Harrington's behind her. She might. She might fuck it up. Take no prisoners, but like, the opposite way that's usually meant. still just as fuckign rad tho. my brain is turning. rotating like a microwave plate. mmmmmmmmm.

That scene was so funny though. cherry on top of a wonderful episode. i have...i have things to consider.

@threeheartscast @citrusandsalt @ilaalexei

#lush chats #quin chats #quin is sleepy now #three of hearts pod #three of hearts #edil liveblogs three of hearts

[getallemeralds]

OKAY. UM. so it's been Literally Like A Year Or Two since i last talked about Rescue in any detail (?!) so you guys get some unhinged rambling about furries

...UNDER THE CUT, BECAUSE THIS GOT LONG.

Sol, he/him: woke up one day in a weird abandoned lab with no idea how he got there or literally anything at all. and then found out that thanks to Dubious Science he is now unable to be killed. which is very cool except for the "i dont know where i am, apparently i've been missing for HALF A YEAR, and also now my blood is BLUE????" thing. originally stressed, sarcastic, and distrustful, but once he's in a safer environment he turns out to be warm-hearted if awkward and has trouble expressing his feelings. technically undead. Rescue's set in 2017ish so he's, like. 20. likes spicy food, space, and Sonic; dislikes bright red, jello, and sticky things.

Zyd, she/her: fellow lab experiment with a lot of knowledge on the projects the lab was undertaking before being abruptly abandoned. fills Sol in on the whole "yeah you can't be killed anymore, have fun with that" thing, has a more extreme form of it where she literally can't feel pain but regenerates super quickly. comes off as very self-confident and driven, but is actually exhausted and wants to go back to a normal life as much as Sol does. this rabbit has trauma. likes horror movies, loud music she can yell along to, and citrus; dislikes being touched (with exceptions), harsh noise, and shirts.

Tank, she/they/he: literally just kinda Shows Up, does terribly at getting in Sol's good books, and is just kinda running around Causing Problems on accident. initial impression of being airheaded and naive, but that starts to crack eventually bc it turns out they're an anxious mess with a super low opinion of herself. oops! also they broke in but are very avoidant on Why. manages to blunder her way into becoming good friends with Sol afterwards. likes rhythm games (bonds with Sol over them), speedcore, and shrimp; dislikes getting talked over, romcoms, and needles.

Monty, he/him: third member of the Lab Experiment Gang, although Sol doesn't get to meet him for a while due to Tank knocking things off course. chronically ill and willingly volunteered hoping it'd help, became friends with Zyd, and then things went Terribly Wrong. nonverbal. prefers communicating through text (they confiscated his phone). was a theater kid. i BARELY talk about him and he didnt pass the sexy lamp test for an uncomfortable amount of time despite his friendship with Zyd being incredibly important. likes gardening, Portal, and trashy YA fantasy; dislikes bananas.

CY, they/them: WHERE. IS MY ART OF THEM. DID I SERIOUSLY NOT SAVE RECENT STUFF INTO THE RESCUE FOLDER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA okay uh. CY is a hostile AI and the reason why the lab got abandoned - everything's in lockdown until they can figure out how to neutralize them, which is difficult when they've basically evolved into a virus that's taken over the lab's network and is trying to break through to the outside world. there is a lot more to them but they're kind of a mess. could probably be a notITG SRT villain.

Griffin, he/him: android assistant that is completely unaware the lab is abandoned because, like. the experiments patients are still there! somebody's gotta look after them! was very much not programmed to handle any of this and so is constantly frazzled and would like everyone to stop trying to break out, please. would also like everyone to stop trying to break IN, PLEASE, YES THAT MEANS YOU TANK. Zyd is very friendly with him, Sol has no idea what to make of him, CY fucking hates him. he's a... cat... dragon.. robot... thing..?

Seb: they/them, was named Sandblast until literally 5 minutes ago (originally was a Soundscapes character so theyre named after a song but got ported into Rescue years ago and i. never changed their name). trying very, Very hard to balance Griffin out, not really succeeding. has a lot of guilt about basically everything and is just trying to keep everything running smoothly. quiet and nervous. Wow I Wonder Which Leo Designed This Guy (it was pat)

there's also at least 3 more guys but one of them doesn't have proper art yet (Aloe, "sibling" to Seb and just kinda vibing her way through the whole situation), one of them barely has info at all and might be a backstory character, and the third one needs a huge overhaul. i swear to god ill do proper work on anybody that isn't the main trio (sol/zyd/tank) and CY someday

#leo chirps #leos ocs #if you read all this: congrats! why???? #this took me over an hour please clap #oc: sol mathonwy #oc: zyd #oc: monty #oc: CY #oc: griffin #oc: seb #oc: TK #running to your Rescue

[adultswim2021]

The Venture Bros. #33: “The Buddy System” | June 29, 2008 - 11:30PM | S03E05

The Buddy System! Sorta a normal episode! World-building is ever present in the Venture-verse, though, so we get at least a few firsts. (cool voice) Let’s dive in… shall we?

Dr. Venture launches a chintzy “Daycamp for Boy Adventurers”. Everyone on or near the compound has crappy informational booths, and Doc can sell photo ops and Rusty Venture merch. Lots of stuff happens, but despite that, there’s not a ton of story. It’s more of a collection of fun scenes and looming threats of story. For example: The Monarch is monitoring the festivities using the Moppets. His scenes exist mostly for laughs, and also to introduce Dr. Mrs. the Monarch’s new sexy costume. As noted in the commentary by Doc Hammer, it was nice seeing this costume at conventions. Seriously, when I used to go to conventions, there were so many hot Venture Bros. cosplayers. I sat next to a very beautiful Lady Au pair once, who had little baby dolls that she’d turned into the Moppets. I was too scared to talk to her. Shoulda asked for a photo.

I’m not sure if you can tell this, but I am having a hard time making this write-up come together. I guess what I'm trying to say is It’s a fine episode, and worth watching, but the middle stretch of season three is not my favorite of the series. I’m much more excited about season four. Damn. I wish this was season four right now. I am also high, and not really in the mood for this. I am in a big “organize stuff’ mood right now instead of a writing mood. I am pulling out some boxes of stuff and trying to find new places for them. Trying to make it so only best VHS tapes are out, and the bad ones are in storage. In other words, the shit that makes life worth living. 

This episode is also the debut of Dermott Fictel, a bad kid who befriends Hank. He uses sass mouth on Brock and it twists him up because he can’t touch Dermott; he’s just a kid. It’s also sorta implied that maybe he intuited some kind of familial bond with the boy. At the end of the episode, Dermott gets picked up by his mom and they briefly exchange dialogue that indicates that she brought the boy there to meet his real father (unbeknownst to said father). At the end we see a nice photo of them together after the ordeal they go through. The ordeal they go through is this: Brock tries to train Dean to fight Dermott but he doesn’t wanna. But then Dermott embarrasses Dean in front of Triana and also says nasty stuff to her, so Dean basically re-enacts the scene where Ralphie beats the shit out of Scott Farkus in A Christmas Story, which is a great movie, alright? 

There is a notable scene which functions as a cliff-hangery act-break: Dr. Venture takes kids into an old training facility that had been abandoned and through some mysterious, possibly super-sciencey reason, the inside of it has become a bio-diverse jungle filled with dangerous wild Gorillas. I mention this scene because I want to discuss how badly edited it is on the blu-ray; they did the thing where they tried to diminish the effects of it being an act break by making it so it doesn’t fade-out or in. This edit jumps out to me, it feels like a fan-edit or something. 

This scene has one of the funnier references and one of the darkest jokes of the series. The group of children lead by Dr. Venture and Billy Quizboy are immediately confronted with a terrifying and aggressive gorilla, and Rusty tries to do Ko-Ko talk to it. Ko-Ko was a famous, highly intelligent sign-language-doing Gorilla that had a children’s book published called Ko-Ko’s Kitten. I am of an age to have owned such a book, which was fairly ubiquitous when it was published. Before I saw this episode, I had read a transcript of an AIM chat Ko-Ko did via an interpreter, and Ko-Ko would intermittently use the words “lip” and “nipple” randomly throughout her Denis-Miller style rants. They do a riff on that here, but they soft-peddle the amount of times she typically said “nipple” in a sentence.

The dark joke is that Billy gets locked in the dome, and when he comes out his metal arm is torn asunder and he’s clutching a child’s shoe. He reports that he saw Ko-Ko Bone Tomahawk a child in there. Dr. Venture makes off with the shoe. At the end of the episode, the boy’s parents show up to collect him and Dr. Venture gives them a clone slug, apparently a quickie clone job he performed to make it up to them. When they walk away, slightly puzzled, Venture makes a point to say that the original kid’s DNA was a “walking time bomb for cancer” and that he “cleared that all up”.

It’s sorta enough to have him just be trying to protect his hide, but the cancer bit is a little bit of a softening of the character. In season one he straight up admits to having sacrificed an orphan to power his masturbation holodeck machine, But, I don’t blame the show for just pushing past that joke anyway. I’m sure if there was a letters section at the end of this show they’d address this letter by removing that joke from canon.

The cloned kid scene is a bit of a happy ending to the traditional bit of gallows humor surrounding camp. Like, remember how you’d sing self-deprecating camp songs and there’d always be comical exaggerations that involved the death of a fellow camper in the lyrics? Like the food’s so bad here that it murdered a kid who tried to eat it, haha! Those songs usually fail to thoughtfully address the parents of that child who would spend years mourning him (or her! mustn't be sexist!).

Also a thing I wanted to say about this scene; this episode's ending includes a montage of photos of the event, and there's a brief photo of the triad levitating a wheelchair kid. For a moment I thought it was actually the apparition of the dead boy, and that he died because of his lack of mobility, which is VERY funny, and VERY dark (except for the whole thing of ghosts being real, life after death, etc). I figured out that this is probably not the joke. It's probably just that if you could levitate people, you'd probably go out of your way to levitate wheelchair kids. They would love it so much.

What else? Oh, I didn’t do a sweep of the wiki for this episode, which is usually what i do to make sure that I can steal valor knowing a cultural reference that I didn’t actually get. There is what seems like a very specific Jonny Quest reference in this and the commentary basically confirms that. Oh yeah, there’s more Jonny Quest connectivity in this one. You better believe it.

That reminds me: I was supposed to do a thing where I was going to watch all the episodes of Jonny Quest before watching Venture Bros, but I never did. I thought maybe I’d at least weave a few episodes in here and there, as to not miss vital specific references to specific episodes. Sorry!

Another thing from the commentary that I thought was great was that the opening sequence, which is a commercial for the Daycamp, is a parody of an actual local ad for an actual local day camp. Where? I don’t know. But it’s a talking balloon instead of a talking lightbulb. I bet it’s this There are scrolling photos of children that are actual childhood photos of Jackson and Doc as boys, but they had to edit some of the kids out because they couldn’t find the person to ask for permission. 

Hey, I’m not sure people like when I do this, but I’m doing it anyway. I remember I was hanging out with my best friend Andrew when this episode came on, and I was planning to go home and watch it at 11:30PM, even claiming to have a hard out around 11 so I could make it home with plenty of time to spare. It is roughly 8:35PM, and Andrew turns on the TV and it’s playing. He has Direct TV and I didn’t realize that meant he got the east coast feed of Cartoon Network.

I see that the DVR is actually recording it, which means he could hit rewind and we could just watch it from the beginning. He goes “oh, cool. We can just watch it now!”  and he just keeps letting it play, all 5 minutes behind. I say “What’s fucking wrong with you, start it from the beginning!” and he groaned and rolled his eyes in a very exaggerated way, like he was being put out, and he literally pushed a single button and it started at the start. A very funny man!! That is my friend!

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #the venture bros.