chaosdemodocus

[chaosdemodocus]

1,

2,

3,

Is that me?

3,

4,

Not anymore,

Or sure,

I mean-

Sometimes

But maybe,

Maybe not most times

I don’t think I’m she

But am I he?

God,

that’s scary

That’s a scary thought

A very scary thought

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq poetry

[chaosdemodocus]

She comes with a warning label,

Or 5

Fragile is the first one

It says fragile on the box

In big red letters

F R A G I L E

It says

The second one is a letter

A letter from the previous owner

It states used

“She’s used,” it says

“Inadequate performance,”

The third one is a precaution

Broken, broken it says

There are missing pieces

Haphazardly glued together in glitter glue

The fourth one is her story

The first owner she had

He wasn’t very kind

She has scars you can’t see

The fifth one is an urging

“Too much?

Return to sender.”

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #trauma poetry #vent poem #sa survivor #sa poetry

[chaosdemodocus]

My body

My body

My

Body

But it’s not mine

My body is not mine

My body,

Stolen

Conquered

And left to rot

My body

Never loved

But lost

My body

His body

Forgotten

And tossed

He stole

And forgot

And left it to rot

It is

His body

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #sa survivor #sa poetry #sa poem #trauma #trauma poetry

[chaosdemodocus]

Do I need a reason to say I love you?

Do I need a reason to say I love you?

There are times

Times when just want to say it

Those three words

I love you

But then i think

Would it be weird?

To just say it randomly,

Speak it whenever I feel it

Because I feel it often

But is that a waste of those words

To just say it?

If I use them too often,

Will their meaning disappear?

So I ask

Do I need reason to say I love you?

Because I do,

I do love you.

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #love poetry #love poem

[chaosdemodocus]

My mother, my mother

Always doing what is best for me?

No.

My mother, my mother

Always does what she believes to be best

For me?

No.

For who?

I don’t know.

My mother, my mother

She never listens,

My mother, my mother

She never asks,

My mother, my mother

Only does what she believes is best

But

My mother, my mother

If she’d only heard me

She would know

My mother, my mother

Never does what is best for me.

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #mother daughter relationship #my poerty

[chaosdemodocus]

“Love is the most easily corrupt emotion” he says.

“But love can also be the most beautiful thing. It hurts us, because it’s real.” I answer.

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #love poetry #love poem #he’s so beautiful

[chaosdemodocus]

Is there a solution to a problem which can’t be fixed?

Cause I’m in this corner getting nervous kicks

My feelings are tender and real as day,

But for you i must push them away.

You, my best friend

My brother in arms,

Now I’m guilty of falling for your charms.

It’s a little flame that could start a fire

Burn down a forest on pure desire

It’s a destructive force I’ve hidden away

Simply something I cannot say,

Every moment of closeness

Or second of touch

Flares this flame way to much

I can’t tell what you feel

So I hide mine away,

It’s the only safe thing today

But maybe in the future,

Sometime then

You’ll be tender to me

And they’ll flare up again.

#poetry #original poem #poem #vent #poetblr #love poem #love poetry #unrequited love

[chaosdemodocus]

Bring me to a vineyard in Tuscany…

Bring me to a vineyard in Tuscany, exactly like that painting…

Only a place so beautiful can inhabit a love so poetic.

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #tuscany #italian countryside #love poem #love poetry #art poetry #artistic poetry #art #nature poem #nature poetry #classical poetry

[chaosdemodocus]

Unreliable.

“I won’t do it again” he says.

Liar.

“I want to believe that” I say.

It’s true.

“I will try.” He speaks.

Liar.

It’s been a day.

He does it again.

Unbelievable.

“I won’t do it again.” He said.

Liar.

Liar!

“I feel myself pulling away.” He says.

It’s true.

I push him away.

“Don’t force yourself to stay, I don’t.” I say.

Liar.

我真的讨厌你，

但是真愿我能够爱你。

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #vent poetry #vent poem #men are stupid #men are trash #taking off the rosé coloured glasses #falling out of love #Spotify

[chaosdemodocus]

G h o s t

What I’m hearing is that you’re single now,

No,

I will not be here when you come back,

Because,

What I’m hearing is that you’re single now,

You can’t come back with Flowers,

With the world,

But,

I will not be here when you come back,

Because,

What I’m hearing is that you’re single now,

You leave without a word, without a clue,

You’re no man,

You are a boy, immature.

Therefore,

I will not be here when you come back,

Because,

What I’m hearing is that you’re single now,

When you come back,

I will not be here,

Because,

I expect better,

I deserve better,

Be better,

I am gone now,

Left you the moment you decide to leave,

To leave without a word,

You are simply

Single now.

#poetry #original poem #poem #poetblr #vent #men aint shit #men are the problem #angry post #men are trash #I thought it would be different #Spotify

[chaosdemodocus]

The water and I

I did something today, I looked in the mirror and looked at myself.

I did something today, but I ended up sitting on the floor of my bathtub for 10 minutes.

Hugging myself, In silence.

Just me, the water and I.

#Spotify #poetry #original poem #poetblr #poem #vent #art #survivor #vent poetry #vent poem

[chaosdemodocus]

I will say it even when you cry.

Whisper it in your ear,

Softly like morning dew,

You are incredibly strong

And I hope you know it too.

#poetry #original poem #poetblr #poem #posting this now cause the bf’s offline in military #art #love quotes

[chaosdemodocus]

And suddenly,

You are just,

not there anymore.

#poetry #original poem #poetblr #vent #death poem #death poetry #poem

[chaosdemodocus]

First name basis

Some may think it disrespectful

Others think it horrid

Most think it rude

But to me it makes sense

It’s the only thing that makes sense

I call them by their first names

It’s not to be cruel

Others call them mom and dad

Mother and father

But I don’t

Not anymore

I ran away,

In my head, I ran away

but I’m still here

I come to visit once in a while

But there’s always something that makes me run again

Mom and dad becomes first name basis

They become a set of frustrating strangers

They who were supposed to be protectors

Become acquaintances on first name basis

Besides,

They don’t react to mom and dad on my voice

Not anymore

So it seems we’re strangers,

Nothing more

#poem #vent #original poem #poetblr #poetry #estranged #vent poem #writerblr

[chaosdemodocus]

Anything but indifference

I can’t complain too much

Others have it worse

Enduring things I cannot comprehend

But sometimes I wish there was a reaction

Sometimes I wish my trust was appreciated

Sometimes I wish they didn’t take

my words

my trust

my love

for granted

Joy

Pride

Happiness

Even anger

Anything but indifference

Pain

Hurt

Love

Or Hate

Anything but indifference

Any reaction would do

Yell at me

Cry to me

Smile for me

Insult me,

Just anything but indifference

#poem #poetry #short poem #queer poems #lgbtqia #coming out #vent poem #poetblr #original poem #writerblr

[chaosdemodocus]

I feel like a child,

Or perhaps, I feel like a child, again.

She speaks of it so lightly,

She laughs,

She smiles,

She even cracks jokes,

It’s all in the past, she giggles

Let bygones be bygones, she smiles

How far away, is it really?

When every time I speak of it,

I become that little child again,

The one who blames herself,

Despite knowing so very well that she was, just a child.

I am,

Just a child,

a child who’s lived a thousand lifetimes.

I am that child,

But she is not me,

She does not know me,

But I know her.

So very well,

I know the pain,

I know the suffering,

But she does not know the struggle

She has not had the time to truly weigh it

To understand it

To hold it as if it were tangible in her hands

We both know the pain,

We both experienced it,

Yet only I am left to live with it,

Only I have felt it’s true weight,

on my body,

Like chains that will not break.

They hold me back,

they force me,

To feel and relive,

Yet still,

I speak of it so lightly,

I laugh,

I smile,

I even crack jokes,

In the end,

I fear, I’m just making sure,

That it’s not I who

cracks next.

#poetry #original poem #writers and poets #writers on tumblr #i did a thing #vent #trauma #yeah idk #poetblr #writerblr

[chaosdemodocus]

…and our joy was so bright we could see nothing else but each other. 🌅