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peach-and-bugs · 10 months

Note

“I didn’t miss you. But now you're here and… god, fuck me,” with teen nat preferably angst/smut please. thank you!

❤️I'm Out of Time - Natalie Scatorccio (2000) x fem!Reader❤️ (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked)

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disclaimer: don't repost my work. I only post on Tumblr and on Ao3. anything else is stolen and should be removed immediately

Summary: You hadn't seen Natalie for years. Not since she'd come back after the crash, and you where alright with that. You'd taken time for yourself and you'd moved on. You were working on your degree and finding yourself. You weren't anticipating any interruptions…

Warnings: Post-crash, 2000 (Natalie and reader are both 22), angst, swearing, Travis, toxic dynamics & smut (18+, Minors DNI, you will be blocked) - fingering, praise kink, oral fixation + some spit, top!Natalie, dumbification, minor primal but only if you really squint

Word Count: 3,618

A/N: Hello loves! I'm knocking out two requests with this one, as the quotes felt like they worked together well, so I hope yall don't mind! To make up for it I've made it a much longer than some other one-shots. I also felt like this could be read as sort of a sequel to my other Natalie fic, Blame Game, as both of these have pretty similar theming going on. As always, feel free to leave questions or comments in my comments or ask box, and happy reading!

Natalie Scatorccio Tag List:

Yellowjackets Tag List: @frasersgf @minimickzy @damagnificentcookie

General Tag List: @summergeezburr

-❤️-

You’re day had gone on relatively average compared to most days. You’d gone grocery shopping after class and work for the week as you desperately needed to restock your fridge. Normally, it was your roommate’s week to do the shopping, but she was out for the weekend visiting family back in Jersey, so today, you bit the bullet and got it done. You were currently fumbling with your bags as you talked to your mom on your cellphone, all while trying to get out of your taxi. Your mother always tended to call at the worst times.

“No, Mom, I’m fine! I’m just trying to get inside, is all,” you huffed when she asked why you were breathing so hard. “Yes, money’s fine. I’ve just gotta balance work and school, is all” She cut you off again, and you had to stifle your sigh of irritation. You fumbled to pull your keys out of your bag as you approached your doorstep.

Only when you looked up, did you notice the figure sitting in front of your apartment’s door. Your apartment mainly was single girls or girls who didn’t live with their boyfriends, so you assumed it was some strange suiter till the figure noticed you and stood. They brushed the hair from their face, and your blood ran cold, freezing you where you stood.

“Ok, Mom? Can I call you back?” Your mother was already pestering you for a reason why before you could finish asking her. “I’m just trying to get inside all with full hands. I’ll call you back. I love you,” You had to talk over her to hang up, followed by a struggle to get your phone out from under your ear and shoulder and into your bag.

Only after that did you acknowledge Natalie, who had simply stood watching you the whole time. You gave her a pointed look before letting out a stuffed breath and approaching her. When she opened her mouth to speak, you shook your head without stopping or skipping a beat as you went to unlock your door.

“No,” was all you said, fumbling with your keys once more.

“I didn’t even say anything,” she started with an exasperated scoff in her tone, following after you.

“No, but I knew you would,”

“Oh, you knew I would say what?” she hadn’t even seen you for five minutes and was already getting defensive—typical Scatorccio behavior. You groaned and just unlocked the door to your apartment complex and walked in with Natalie in tow because there was no getting rid of her now.

“If you’re going to insist on following me, at least take something,” you aggressively shoved a paper bag in her arms, freeing up one of your hands to get a firm grip on your keys. She took the bag with a grimace but didn't further complain as she climbed the stairs with you. Of course, the elevator was still broken after a week, but you might as well get a little cardio in. You dramatically let Natalie into your apartment behind you, taking the bag from her after dropping your keys into the bowl by the door. You gave her no time to try the conversation again as you disappeared into your kitchen. You weren't going to let her derail your task. You wouldn't let her be a disruption.

Eventually, she found you after wandering into the apartment. You only gave her a glance of acknowledgment as you unpacked your groceries. She’d cut her hair, but she hadn't bothered bleaching it again like she always said she would. It now rested just above her shoulders. Her shabby bans could use a trim. The ends were falling in front of her eyes and had to be obstructing her vision. She’d also gotten her lip pierced since the last time she’d darkened your doorstep.

She kept her hands firmly shoved in the pockets of her leather jacket as she watched you. She was acting as though she hadn’t anticipated getting this far. You took a bundle of groceries to the fridge, and upon passing her, you scrunched your nose as you inhaled a familiar sour staleness.

“I thought you stopped smoking,” you commented offhandedly, neglecting to hide any condescending tone. Natalie, not expecting the sudden comment or conversation for that matter, gave you a confused look, her eyes following as you maneuvered around the pocket-sized kitchen.

“I'm sorry?” was all she could ask. You declined, looking back up at her as you turned your back to stick cans in you’re cupboards.

“You smell like cigarettes again,” she scratched at the back of her neck, looking away.

“Yeah, I picked it up again,” she acted as though she was about to be scolded by her mother. You turned around and gave her a hard look, trying to figure out what might be going on in her head. But Natalie was always tricky. She didn't let on what she was thinking. You could never figure her out. When you looked your way again, all you could do was groan and cover your eyes, practically boiling with frustration. And to think, just ten minutes ago, you thought to yourself that you’d been having a good, average day.

“Natalie, what do you want?” you forced yourself to ask, hands gripping the countertop of your kitchen island as you watched her. “Why are you here?”

“Do I need to want something to come and see you?” You were shaking your head before she could finish her thought.

“Yes! Yes, you do, Natalie, because you don’t just drop in,” You maneuvered out of the kitchen and into your living room with Natalie on your heels. “You always want something, even when you refuse to admit it,” You opened a window and stuck your head out, taking in a long breath of somewhat fresh city air. The sun was already starting to set as streetlights turned on one by one. Squeezing your eyes shut, you forced yourself to stick your head back into your apartment and face your “company.”

“I’m assuming it's money again,” you gave her a cold stare, crossing your arms and leaning against the windowsill. Natalie gawked at you, her jaw slightly hung wordlessly open till she scoffed, running a hand through her hair in exasperation. “What, am I wrong? Or maybe you thought you could crash on my couch,” you egged her on. This, of course, pissed her off, which you thought ‘good. If I have to be pissed, then so should she,’.

“Wow, so college did make you a stuck-up bitch,” she said under her breath, immediately regretting her bitter tongue based on the deer-in-headlights look she gave you after, but even with the apology pressed to her lips, you didn't have it.

“Fuck you, Scatorccio. You can leave right now for all I care,” you got up as you spoke, hands clenched into fists as you pointed at her chest. You raised a hand to shove her and get her out of your house, but she acted faster, grabbing you by the wrist. Her grip was tight, but not painful, but still enraging. That is till you looked into her eyes for just a little too long, and you gave up, your anger melting into pity and frustration instead as your brow knit and you frowned with a trembling lip.

“What more do you want from me, Natalie,” you asked weakly, holding from screaming despite the urge you had. But Natalie couldn’t immediately give you an answer. That or she didn’t want to answer. Instead, she just held your wrist, her eyes searching your face for something you couldn’t pinpoint as she frowned. That is till she couldn’t take it, her eyes waving from you, and she shook her head, lips parting as she found her wording.

“I guess I missed you,” you couldn’t help growing angry again. You tugged your wrist from her, which didn’t take much effort, and gave her a point, hurt, look again.

“You ‘guess?’ What, Travis not doing it for you anymore, so you thought you’d just come back to me as backup, once again?” It was now Natalie’s turn to get angry.

“This has nothing to do with him-”

“Oh, it always does, Natalie,” you argued back, throwing your hands in the air in exasperation as you began to pace the room. “It’s always gonna be about Travis because you only want me when you can’t have him,”

“That’s not true!” she yelled back with gritting teeth.

“When was the last time you came to see me when you weren't on a break?” you pressed, feeling the sting of tears begins to sting your eyes.

“When was the last time you thought about me when you were with him, huh? I’ll tell you because you don’t think of me when you’re with him. You only think about me when you’re all alone, and I’m your last resort because you push everyone else away,” You finally let yourself yell, choking on tears. You knew you didn’t mean what you were saying, not wholeheartedly anyway. You just wanted her to go. You wanted to hurt her so she’d leave and never come back because you couldn’t keep doing this.

You couldn’t keep feeling like second best or being around for a quick fuck when she was feeling lonely. You’d moved on! You were living your life for you and finding your way in the world. But then Natalie has the nerve to walk back in when she feels like it and when it is convenient for her. What about when it was convenient for you?

What about way back when, when you’d waited for her, your best friend, to see you standing there, wanting her that whole time, only to pick a douchebag boy over you. Natalie said nothing as you began to cry. You felt like you were caving in on yourself, morphing back into that sad, lonely teenager who longed to be noticed as someone more than a friend.

“I didn’t miss you,” you finally managed to talk again through choked sniffles. You sounded pitiful; you knew it. But what else was there to do now but to keep being honest? “I was finally feeling good! But now you're here and- god, fuck me,” you ran your hands through your hair, shaking your head as you pulled your eyes away from her, biting your lip. You took your fist, wrapping it around the thumb on your other hand, allowing your hands to shake as you started to pace once more.

God, you wanted her to leave, but still, the thought of being alone after all this felt unbearable. And despite the anger you were feeling, you still wanted her. You wanted her to hold you, caress you, make you forget all the bad things you'd been feeling. You just wanted it all to go away. You hadn't even noticed that you shut your eyes again till you felt Natalie’s hands caress your face, thumbing at the tears that fell as she wrapped her hand around your clenched fingers. You couldn’t help looking up at her, your cheek eagerly seeking to lean into the warmth of her palm. She looked down at you with sad, wet brown eyes that you couldn’t help being captivated by.

“I’m sorry, y/n,” she murmured rather stiffly, swallowing thickly as she nodded. “You’re right about all of it. And I’m sorry,” you took in a long sniff and shook your head.

“No, no, you're not. You're just saying that” You began to argue, but she urged you to listen.

“I am sorry, and I’ve missed you. Fuck, I’ve missed you so much,” she urged, squeezing your hand. “I just don’t wanna drag you into all my bullshit, you know? Because you don’t deserve that,” she explained weakly.

“I could have taken it,” You urged her, but she shook her head.

“I wouldn’t let you,” You sniffled again, relenting in a silent nod. You let that silence hang in the air till you couldn't bare it.

“Make it up to me?” Natalie knew the implication behind your request. You used that phrase with one another some times before, but now she wasn’t so sure.

“I don't know if that’s the best idea,” She murmured, taking her rare turn to be the rationally thinking one. But you shook your head as a final tear rolled down your cheek.

“Please,” you begged, squeezing her hand. “Just this time. If I regret it, it’s for me to deal with in the morning,” you knew you sounded miserably helpless, and you'd be embarrassed by your neediness when your mind cleared again, but for now, you leaned into it, excepting the mess you where when it came to Natalie. It was a bitter cycle; you knew it, but you could deal with the ramifications in the morning. After looking into your eyes for too long, she relented, taking your lips in with hers as your hands found refuge dug deep in her hair.

-❤-

She pressed you hard into the bed, aggressively tugging at your shirt to come off over your head as she straddled your hips, letting out hot and heavy breaths against your ear as she struggled to swallow the moan that threatened to push past her lips. You started to tug at her ripped shirt as well, only for Natalie to stop you and take it off in one swift motion. You are about to reach out for her till she gets off your lap, scooping under you to move you up the bed.

She kneeled on the bed above you and between your legs, messing with the buckle of her belt, smiling down at you with a wicked grin as her eyes lingered on your exposed, rising chest, then down to the band of your pants. Wordlessly you understand to take your pants off and sit up to do so as Natalie does the same. With the last major layer removed, your both left clad in your underwear. That is till you took your bra off, leaving your chest bare in front of her.

Natalie lunged forward, straddling your hips once more as she caught your lips in a heavy, messy kiss. Teeth scrape at your lip, and you meet the cold metal of her lip ring. Her breath was hot as it fanned over the skin of your face till she moved on to your neck. She sat above you, holding herself up with a knee and embows as she started marking up your neck. Her knee shifted into place between your legs, forcing into your core, and you let out a heavy moan from your throat. You could feel her smiling against the spot she now soothed on your neck, knowing what she’d done.

“That's a c-cheep shot,” you managed to stutter out as she moved on to scrap her teeth over your collarbone. She’d done that long ago on accident but recalled the reaction you'd had then too. Your hips began to gently rock against her knee, already craving any friction available for the growing ache down below. Of course, Natalie only found this to be further amusing. But she eventually relented, her hands pressing your hips down and still, as she moved down your body, kissing your stomach as she pulled her knee away and practically pealed away your underwear.

She dared to look up at you through her lashes with that blown, lusting look in her eye that had you turning your head away, fust clenching the pillow under your head as you bit your lip to stifle the moan in your throat. Of course, this wasn’t acceptable as she always liked seeing your eyes, so her hand snaked into your underwear, the pads of her pointer and middle finger finding your clit with ease; she moved up your body again, taking your chin between your fingers. You knew your face was flushed and hot, your chest heaving up and down with labored breath, your brows creasing as you strained to suppress the sounds pulling at your throat. But all the same, Natalie smiled down at you, her eyes full of unfamiliar warmth and affection that you craved.

“Don’t be quiet for me,” she purred, tilting her head as she held your chin. She squeezed your cheeks just enough to part your lips, which released a breathy moan, and she grinned, nodding along as her fingers began to circle your clit in rhythm with the roll of your hips. You were already feeling the oncoming brain fog as she continued her circlings, and without giving it any thought, your hands reached out, caressing her cheeks as she smiled down at you proudly.

Looking into her eyes, your mouth hung open as you let out every moan that surfaced as she circled your clit, going round and round till you felt like you were dizzy, but it wasn’t going to be enough. You were greedy. You needed more from her, more of her.

“Natalie, please,” you managed, your expression straining with every swipe. She shooshed you, cooing so gently as she nodded.

“I know, baby, I know. I’m getting there. You’re being so patient,” she finally moved on from your clit to test the waters of your entrance, which you knew was embarrassingly soaked by now. But Natalie didn't mind. She seemed to enjoy the way her fingers glided in with ease and how you let out another shuddering moan against her ear. After some adjustment, she began to pump and curl her fingers in a timely rhythm with the rocking of your hips.

She fawned at the way your eyes rolled back as her palm met your already sensitive clit, cooing muffled praise amongst the sound of your moans.

“That’s right. Keep up those pretty faces for me,” she purred just before she began messily kissing your jaw. After all these years, it still amazed you how she had you memorized. Fucking you was like riding a bike. Natalie never seemed to forget what she was doing. You tightened around her fingers, thighs squeezing around her hand to make sure you weren't going anywhere as you climbed your high.

Natalie groaned against your throat as the feeling but kept going. She’d moved so she was laying beside you, her head buried into your neck, biting at your shoulder as she grew increasingly aroused just by listening to the sounds from your throat and your cunt. Realizing how close she was to you among your building haze, you managed to think it wasn’t enough. So in a moment of desperation, thanks to your impending orgasm, you rolled over just enough to force your mouth against hers as a hand grappled at her still-clothed breast, slipping your fingers under the red lace to find hard, sensitive nipples waiting for you.

You strummed over her nipple with your thumb, and Natalie let out an unfamiliar, strangulated sound that ended in an animalistic whimper. The feeling caused her to pump harder into you and ultimately was the final push to send you over the edge with a similar howling cry as you curled in on yourself, your forehead falling to Natalie’s shoulder as you grappled at her bare arms. You could hear her hiss at the sting of your nails clawing at her skin as you started to come down.

Her hand slowed gradually as she continued to pump in and out, steadying you off of your high. She pulled away from you ever so slightly, nudging your thighs apart with her free hand to take her fingers back from you. She made a big show of licking her fingers clean till you gained enough self back to reach out, taking her wrist in hand and cleaning her fingers yourself. You watched her, doe-eyed and still hazy, as you let her fingers pass your lips, tongue running around her digits as you moaned at your taste. She appeared jealous watching the action but seemed to enjoy it nonetheless.

“Well, look at you,” she murmured under her breath with a turned smile. She sat up on her side, propping herself up with her elbow. You let her fingers go with a pop as they passed your lips, and she grinned as she wiped your spit off on her underwear. You smiled contently without saying a word as you reached up, brushing Natalie’s bangs from her forehead where they stuck with sweat. Your hand ran down her jaw, guiding her back to your lips for another long kiss. As the kiss went on, your hands began to wander, but she stopped you before you could make your way into her pants. She held your wrist and shook her head, kissing your palm.

“Not now. Just get some sleep,” she murmured, unclasping her bra from behind to throw it over the edge of the bed as she got up. She ducked away into your bathroom. You lie naked in the dark, listening to the sound of the tap turning on and running for some time before it turned off as she retired with wet cloth in hand. She helped you under the covers as she got in with you and slipped the warm rag between your legs, casually helping your clean up. The rag was also tossed to the floor with the rest of your clothes as Natalie crawled into bed with you. She didn’t often stay the night, but in your growing groggy state, you smiled, feeling her wrap around you, holding you tight. Maybe she wouldn’t stay, but for now, she was here and you were going to be content with that.

#◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡ kay's at it again♡#yellowjackets #yellowjackets fanfic #yellowjackets x reader #fanfiction requests #fic request #natalie scatorccio #natalie scatorccio x reader

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yxami · 1 year

Note

I loveee your writing!!! I want reader to be with Eros right now!!! Would you right more soft content about them???

Of course! I’m happy people like my writing! I’ll write whatever you guys request! It’s really fun to hear your guys’ ideas .

Description: Eros the yandere Cupid, soft content, lots of feelings, I’m glad you guys love him so much! He’s prolly one of my favs too!

You were comfortable in the sheets of your own bed, of course with your beloved Cupid hugging you tightly as if you were a stuffed animal. You could feel his face so close to yours. You’ve gotten accustomed to waking up and seeing how close the both of you were.

You found your phone under one of your pillows and moved as much as Eros would let you before grumbling and pulling you back closer. You checked the time and saw it was 9:41 am. Pretty early to wake up when you had nothing to do today.

You thought it would be fun to go out to a park, maybe some grocery shopping before so you could make sandwiches and stuff. You decided that was the plan for the day! You’d just have to wake up Eros which was probably the most challenging thing to do when he was especially comfortable.

You shook Eros and he whined not wanting to wake up. He mumbled incoherent words and covered his face with the blankets.

“Mmph, what do you want” He mumbled, now being able to speak coherently.

“Cmon, we gotta get ready” You were persistent on getting this lazy Cupid out of bed, despite the fact you were still in bed too.

“For what? You don’t have work or anything..” He yawned, somewhat curious on why you intended to leave the comfort of your own bed. He was also interested in what you wanted him for.

“I wanna go grocery shopping and maybe a picnic! Do you wanna come or no? If not I’ll just go by myself” You knew that Eros would never even think about leaving you alone outside of the house. It was always really funny to see his dumbfounded face that you even suggested to go alone.

“I’m up! Just.. let me fully wake up” He drowsily untangled himself from the sheets and held your hand so you could lead him to the bathroom while he rubbed his eye.

“So I’m thinking we get some food from the grocery store nearby, and then we go to that one park that’s like two streets down. What do you think?” You were alert and ready for anything despite it being the morning, which was never the greatest time for the either of you. You were excited for the day though! So your need to go out kept you up.

“M’kay, do you think we could get some snacks though? I think we’re running out” He got his toothbrush out of the ceramic holder that kept the both of yours. You honestly felt like you had a roommate rather than Eros being your personal cupid.

You didn’t mind though, you liked living with him. It was fun and probably wasn’t the best thing for the buried feelings that resided in your heart about him though.

“Of course we can, you just gotta stop raiding the pantry when you’re bored. You’re supposed to eat when you’re hungry.” You sighed.

“It’s the same thing!”

After you and Eros were done getting ready you made sure you had everything you needed. You’d get the things from the store, come back to the house, prepare the food, and then have the picnic! Maybe after the picnic then the two of you could watch a new movie.

“Keys, phone, money, do you have everything?!”You called out to Eros who was rushing around doing something. Luckily, he had remembered to hide his wings away so they weren’t there anymore nor was his halo. You could only imagine all the dumbfounded stares if he walked into the store with giant wings.

“Yeah! I’m just looking for uhm…” He forgot what the word was but he knew it was a type of clothing! He just couldn’t find it nor remember the word.

“I have your jacket! Let’s go!” You rushed Eros out and he quickly went into the car, waiting for you. In record time you followed close behind him and made sure to lock the door.

The grocery list wasn’t awfully long, just things needed for a good picnic. You didn’t have bread so you needed that, and also some fruits! While you were contemplating what was more important, Eros was watching you patiently.

He was wondering why you were so eager today to go out but he didn’t mind! He loved hanging out with you, but cuddling in bed on a cold morning was something that not even good food could beat.

He thought your focused face was adorable, the way your eyebrows furrowed and your eyes scanned everything. He was secretly hoping you’d notice him staring and smile at him. It was always refreshing to see your face lighten up.

“Do you think we need grapes? They’re a good snack with other foods. They have green and purple ones.” You softly elbowed Eros so he’d pay attention to the grapes in front. He looked away from you for the first time in a bit and looked at the fruits.

“They look interesting, let’s get them!” He had no idea what grapes tasted like but they looked like little candies so that was a good sign!

“Okay! We just need the bread, I already have mayo and ham at the house” You also grabbed some packaged watermelon that was already sliced.

“What about drinks?” Eros held your hand following you to the bread aisle. You pushed the cart with one hand and had good control on it so you didn’t mind using only one.

“Yeah, we should get some juice or soda” You couldn’t believe you almost forgot drinks, it might be a little hotter than usual.

You found the aisle right after getting the bread, the store was familiar but it’s inevitable to forget something about the store. Eros was staring down another person down the aisle who was suspiciously observing you and him.

You were too focused on which pack of juices you should bring, 2, 6, 8, 12? It was a lot of options for an indecisive individual like you.

Eros flipped off the guy down the aisle and it finally made him fuck off and look away. He honestly didn’t really know what it truly meant, he just knew people used it at each other when they were angry or annoyed. He saw it on the TV a couple of times but never asked you what the entire meaning was.

“Alright, let’s just do this box of 6. Might be a lot for two but it’s gonna get hot out so it’s better to be safer than sorry” You made sure to check back at your list again.

You added a few more snacks to the cart but that was all you needed so you started to head towards the self-check out section. You thought for a moment that Eros was lost but he was just staring at some shirts that looked weird to him.

“I’ll scan, just bag the things I give you” You told him to make sure he wasn’t going to do something dumb.

“Got it!” He was rather quick with bagging. He liked to be helpful to you if it was going to make you happy. He liked doing a lot of things for you, he would do anything for you, he was just scared his love would be a little overwhelming for you.

The recent trip to the store was concluded and the two of you quickly assembled the sandwiches and snacks into good serving sizes. You organized all of it into a bag and back on the road to the nearby park.

The weather was nice, there was good shade under the trees and Eros managed to find a perfect spot! You set up most of the things up like the blanket while Eros unpacked the food. He saw there was other couples doing picnics as well somewhat far away.

“Do you think it would be weird for a Cupid to date their human?” He wasn’t even sure why he was asking. He honestly prayed to any god that you hadn’t heard his question.

“I don’t think so, If it’s a true love between a Cupid and human then why stop their love? Cupids are all about love so why would they shame love between two people just because they’re different” You looked out into the bright sky, the wind felt nice on your face. Was he asking for someone else? Or did he.. like you?

“Yeah.. I don’t think love can be stopped at all if it’s genuine and strong.” He fiddled with his fingers, worrying wether he should speak up or not. What would he do if you rejected him? Kick him out? Ignore him for the rest of your life? He was so scared of what could happen if it went wrong.

“I love you.. a lot” He sighed after his short but impactful words. If you reject him then he’ll have to deal with it somehow, either keeping you to himself no matter what, or respecting your decision and guiding your love life as a normal Cupid as best as he can.

You couldn’t process his words at first. He was confessing to you? He wanted to be with you! The guy you’ve been fawning over ever since you saw him!

“I understand if you don’t love me back it’s oka—“

You cupped Eros’s face kissing him directly on his lips. He made a surprised hum but kissed you back. He closed his eyes, greedily enjoying the kiss as long as you let him.

You panted letting go of this kiss and even you were surprised yourself. You had never been reckless like that before but he always had you feeling unsure and confused. So it was time you were confident!

“I love you too!” You felt intense warmth on your cheeks, stronger than ever before and you could see intense red on his face as well.

Both of you stared at each other for awhile in surprise before he knocked you down with a hug. You felt the air in your lungs knocked out but you didn’t care. All you did was laugh against his weight as he rambled about his nervousness about confessing.

“I didn’t even know whether you saw me like that!” He helped you sit up, and stared at you lovingly.

“I’m so happy I think my wings might appear!” He knew when his emotions were a little too strong like happiness then his wings would pop up if they were hidden before.

“How about we cut the picnic short, go home, watch a movie and cuddle? You can let your wings flutter in happiness when we’re home” You laughed at his excited face after hearing your words.

“Yeah!! Let’s go” He helped you hastily pack up everything, not caring about the picnic anymore. Cuddling with you in bed was much better!

And that’s what happened, you were in bed with Eros. He was more than just your cupid now! He clung onto you more than usual and peppered kisses all over you since you now allowed him.

You fell asleep in his arms first, despite the movie playing, you found his warmth to be more interesting than watching it. He grabbed the remote and turned off the movie, snuggling as close as he could and softly wrapping his wings around you.

#yandere #yandere x you #yandere x y/n #gn reader #male yandere #pls request #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #gender neutral reader #soft yandere #cupid yandere #yandere cupid #cuddling & snuggling #picnic #erosmyoc

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bitchlessdino · 2 years

Text

and they were roommates pt.2

A svt.hub collab

Pairing: camboy!chan x afab roommate!reader

Genre: smut

Word count: 2.2k

tags: pet name (kitten), oral, 34 +35, dirty talk, mentions of sex tape

Summary: Wanting sex is a natural feeling, it just so happens that gratification could be found in the next room with a shitty webcam and an infectious laugh.

author note: thank you @chogiwapadada for helping me proofread this thing and thank you guys for the endless support. the fact that this was on the top page for the seventeen tag is insane and y'all made such a big deal of this and therefore i thank you guys so much. but josh if you see this, no you don't go away, please. i am always constantly overwhelmed by the support and hopefully you guys enjoy this one too!

tag list: @sapphichui @librarian-stacks @dontflailmenow @gyuldaengie @minniemole @greysdarling @romromthedeer @yoondae @dinosbestie

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

You may be wondering, what happened that night when Chan fapped to the thought of you in front of a live audience, not forgetting to invite you when he’s made a mess of himself. Did you really take up his offer, stormed out of your room, and had the most mind-blowing sex with your roommate you ever had?

Of course, you fucking didn’t, are you kidding?

What you actually did was finish off independently in your own rooms and did not speak another word to each other for the rest of the night.

You were awkward roommates at the end of the day and who knows what kind of shit would happen if you decided to pursue these escapades any further. No matter how hot and incredible Chan/Dino looked naked, there was no way you’d potentially ruin your convenient living agreements with your roommate who obviously makes enough money for the both of you (a lot of thanks to you I guess). So, what was the tactical decision after learning your roommate is a popular and successful sex worker?

Act as if nothing happened. What live show? What’s Dino? What even is Svthub? You don’t masturbate, that’s icky.

Yeah, you’re having a hard time believing that too. But what else were you supposed to do?

You could hardly look Chan in the eye the next day. Fortunately, he paid you almost no mind being that it was his weekend too. However, last night’s show was not as easily forgettable for you as it was for him. You could still picture the momentum and force that took hold of his body that managed to power his personal gratification, killing every functional cell of your entire being. His smile was already so pretty on a normal basis but how it twists desperately when he gets closer and closer, and his whines get louder and bolder, you could just cum then and there.

It fucking drove you insane he was just sitting there on the couch, laughing at cartoons as if nothing happened. It, in fact, confused you, even more, making you consider whether last night was even a dream because of how contradicting Chan and Dino really were, but it’s him. That laugh is his, that smile is his, that body is his, and that semi-hard cock poking at his gray sweatpants was definitely his. How were you so stupid that you didn’t notice sooner?

You press your lips in a firm line when you notice him turn his head at you, urging you to swallow the built up drool in your mouth.

“You wanna go grocery shopping today,” he asks, “I think I remember there was a sale for something I’ve been needing for a while.”

Like he needs to participate in any sales from the income he grew overnight.

“We went shopping last week,” you pointed out.

He nods agreeingly, “yeah, but I think we can afford it. I kinda got a huge bonus.”

Yeah, because Chan’s horny roommate couldn’t control themselves.

“Sure. Just let me get my bag.”

He claps his hands in rejoice and waits for you on the couch. When you’re both ready, Chan grabs the house keys and you’re the first one to head to the front door. Turning the knob, you swing the door open and at your feet was a package labeled to your roommate. You curiously pick it up from the ground, “Hey, Chan—”

“Uh, that’s mine,” he snatches it, nervously chuckling, sticking it in a vacant spot on your shared bookshelf.

You narrow your eyes at him as he pushes you out of the apartment and locks the door behind you both. “What was that?”

He shakes his head dismissively, flicking his hand in feigning lack of care. “Just treated myself. Got here earlier than I expected.”

Next day shipping, hmm?

You don’t question it and let Chan lead the way to the local market to grab whatever was missing from your pantry. You push the cart as Chan fills its insides gleefully, walking around like a kid in a toy store. The scene before made you almost forget the persona that clouded your mind, especially as he grows indecisive picking between chips options. You felt a little normal about your situation again.

It was then you found smth you had been looking for. A sugar free coffee syrup collection that you’ve been dying to try and has been sold out for months; it was finally available. The problem was the shelf it was on. Higher than you admit you could reach. You stretch your toes out towards the box, desperately holding on to the whimsical domestic fantasy of flavored coffee, not even getting close to touching the box.

You then feel a presence behind you, his chest grazing your back just enough to feel the noticeable progress he’s made at the gym, and a blackberry scent that hits your nose so delightfully. You didn’t fight the urge to turn around, and you faced Chan as easily hid your body from plain sight, grabbing what you meant to retrieve.

Blinking back cautiously towards him, you see the glimpse of his alluring presence from last nice, but instead you see the full picture. He looks back at you with a taunt, his eyes weighing down to give you a playful condescending grin. In your head, you imagined him teasing you like he would his audience, calling you his little toy or kitten, but instead he says, “Here you go, little one.”

You scoff, snatching the box away from him. “I could have easily gotten it myself.”

He doesn’t move from his stance and instead rests a hand on a shelf mere centimeters from your head. He narrows bedroom eyes down at you and a smile on his face that makes thousands of people climax simultaneously. Your breath hitches as he shifts his stance, where you tighten your grip on the collection box in reassurance.

“I’m sure you think that.” He responds slyly.

You huff in disbelief, pushing past him and towards the cart, grumbling to yourself something about an annoying loser. Chan, within earshot, chuckles to himself, following behind you. Hands besides either of yours on the cart handle, he walks behind you with your back to his chest, essentially embracing you.

You feel the pitter patter of your heart as he whispers in your ear, “anything else I grab from high shelves for ya?”

You roll your eyes and elbow him instinctively, the man holds his gut, absorbing the blow of his consequences. “Please, you’re 5’7. How much help can you actually be?”

“5’8 actually! And I'm a great help!”

When you get back to your apartment, you share the abundance of grocery bags with Chan. You unlock the front door and close it behind both you and Chan. Your gaze lingers at the package left on the book shelf as you pack away the food.

“Not to pry, but what is that package anyway?”

He waves his hands dismissively, “not much, just something I’ve been wanting.”

A fleshlight? A cock ring? Or maybe, a silicone torso?

“Really, you sure seem indifferent for something you’ve been wanting,” you pointed out.

“And you’re really nosy for someone that didn’t want to pry.” He shuts the cabinet, annoyance emitting from his tone.

You feel awful about pestering him but the curiosity was killing you. You continue to light heartedly bring it up every little chance you get. To which, your roommate tries to change the subject or ignore you completely in hopes you forget. Unfortunately for him, you had no off switch.

“Ok, fine, y/n. You really want to know?”

You slightly falter. “…Sure.”

Chan takes out the keys out of his pockets and uses it to shred the box. He flips the box, one cardboard flap at a time, and reveals the excessive packing. He pulls it apart teasingly slow, offering you a slight glare, and your eyes finally land on what was inside. You peer at it confused, pursing your lips before announcing out loud, almost to come to terms with what’s inside.

“A dinosaur onesie?”

“Yeah. Are you happy? You excited yourself for one comfy piece of sleepwear,” he shrugs, underlyingly relieved.

You shake your head, “you spent your bonus on a onesie?”

“What I do in my down time is my business.”

He storms off with his new favorite form of comfort and closes his bedroom door behind him. Your body boiled over with shame, thinking to yourself how selfish and invasive you were being. What, you think because your roommate masturbates to the thought of you once during a web show means you could get in his face?

You facepalm yourself and reluctantly approach his door, a limp knock resonating off the cheap wood. “Chan, I'm sorry. I don’t know why I’m being like this, but that’s no excuse.”

Silence lingers.

“Look it’s not lame to have a onesie okay, I just thought there might be something else in that box? I don’t know, but don’t be mad at me…”

You’re basically talking to a brick wall, or in your case, a wooden door.

“I won’t bother you anymore, okay. I understand there’s some lines that were drawn and I breached one of them…Whenever you want to talk again, let me know. It’s my turn to make dinner anyway. I have to have your input if you’ll complain again.”

You unlatch yourself from the door frame and timidly walk off to your room. Hai door creaks open behind you and your head to see Chan’s head peek out. A guilty expression all over his face and a dry tongue, hesitant to bare out his thoughts. “I did something…bad. Weird even.”

Hesitation is apparent in your response, wondering if he was finally going to admit that secret of his. “okay.”

“I’m not trying to be closed off—”

“You’re not,” you interrupt, “I’m just being annoying.”

“No. No…Well—okay, a little, but maybe I feel that was because of what I did.”

“What did you do, Chan?”

“Don’t make me say it,” he whines.

“It’s okay, you can say it out loud,” you reassure him, “I will not judge.”

“I…may have a little bit too much of your body wash.”

“…huh?”

He steps out from the door. “I know how that kind of stuff does without saying, but it just smells so nice. But luckily I did grab some when we’re out, and you didn't notice, so I couldn’t handle the guilt any longer. So projected on you, got angry with you. I’m sorry.”

You blink back at him, unsure of how to respond. This certainly wasn’t something you expected to come out of your mouth and you wonder why he thought it’d be something to ponder over with your feelings in mind. “How cheap do you think I am?”

He shakes his head. “It’s not that I think that I just…thought you should know the truth.”

“It’s fine, Chan. God, I thought you were going to talk about something serious. Is that all?” You egg on.

“…yeah.” He goes behind the door and isolates himself in his room.

You couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit bothered that it was all he had to say to you. Was he really that unaffected by what happened?

You let out a huff of frustration. You couldn’t take it anymore. You had to masturbate to some random hot guy on the internet. That bad guy had to be Chan. And Chan had to masturbate to you, with you, in front of thousands of other horny people to see. However, did he seem to care? Seems unlikely.

Your fist slams his door repeatedly, desiring the closure that should stop eating you up from inside, demanding him to “admit it” and while internally feeling embarrassed that you dropped the ball so quickly. You were a horny mess.

“You have more to explain to me Lee Chan!”

That goes on for a good minute until the door swings open and the man inside pulls you by the wrist disrupting his peace. You press against him, chest to chest, his eyes narrowing at you in frustration, while you look at him like a child about to receive punishment.

“Instead of waiting for me to say something, why don’t you just ask?” He suggests with a sinister tone under his breath.

Adrenaline courses through your veins, your legs grow weak from his tense presence, and you no longer have the urge to speak. Chan’s hand places on the side of your hip, pulls you up from slipping to the floor, and his expression softens. “Are you that bothered by my job?”

Your eyes fluttered rapidly in anticipation “Y-you knew?”

“It took some thinking,” he chuckles and stops to stabilize you back on the ground, keeping his distance, “are you grossed out by me?”

You became still as a lamp post, jumping between the thought of denying everything or putting it all out in the open. He was into you, you were definitely into him, there shouldn’t be a problem.

“I found you by accident. I didn’t mean to invade a private space of yours…When I found out, it was too late at that point.”

“I see. I hope I didn’t make you feel uncomfortable,” he scratches the back of his head with an uncomfortable grin, “I figured I’d be caught sooner or later. Just didn’t think I’d be so soon.”

“Look, you have a job you enjoy. I’m not going to take that away from you, Chan. It honestly doesn’t bother me. It probably pays more than that receptionist gig.”

“Right…So, how much have you seen?”

You sigh, approaching the cushion of his bed and making yourself home on the sheets. “More than I like to admit, especially to the star. Ha ha.”

Chan snickers, finally relaxing to see how aloof you become, and takes the spot next to you in bed. “I have time.”

You explain to him that in the past few days you’ve been in a sexual rut: not wanting do go out and meet other people, not wanting to go on apps, not wanting to make an effort, but still desperately craved sexual attention. That’s when you found Dino. Dino was alluring to you in a way that made you feel comfortable, yet wanted. Dino had a cheesy way with words, but nonetheless, he had a way with them. He feels inclusive and intimate, making you feel immersed in every recording posted on his site. He was talented in ways you could imagine with the last sexual partners you have and gave you the ultimate goal in the end every single time.

“I’m so flattered…and kinda exposed.”

You laugh quietly to yourself and pat him on the back. “You’re really good at it. I was impressed to say the least.”

“I’m assuming you caught last night's show too?”

Your cheeks began to pink. “Uh, yeah, that show.”

“I just want to say I don’t normally do that. It was a one time thing and I just…I got caught up. I’m sorry.”

“D-don’t be, I was really surprised, but pleasantly,” you let out a nervous chuckle, “but I really didn’t think I had that effect on you.”

“Maybe just a little,” he admits with a shy smile, “And I even invited you. It’s stupid. If I knew you were watching—”

“I didn’t come over because it was a live show, not because I didn’t want to…do that with you.”

His eyes lit up. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Chan fiddles with his fingers before resting it close to yours, your pinkies making skin contact. “So, you wanted to?”

You shrug, having a hard time meeting his eyes as you glowed like a fresh tomato. “I don’t know, maybe, kind of…I didn’t want to start something that could ruin what we have, you know?”

“Right,” he nods, “I get that. The last thing us roommates need is a complicated situation.”

“Exactly. It felt only right to not do anything.”

Chan piques in wonder, readjusting himself in the mattress to lean forward in your direction. “Is it though?”

You scoff, glancing at him briefly. “Of course it is…isn’t it?”

His gaze drifts off towards your lips, flickering back to your eyes. A smile that resembles a Cheshire cat forms on his face, effectively luring you without any words. If he did ever decide to show his face, his income would multiply by ten folds. There was no way someone would be able to ignore a face like that. His lips begin to part, and you follow the shapes they make until your brain processes them into words.

“Do you really think that way?”

You let out light gasp, also surprised by how similarly his tone shifts into Dino and once again you’re hypnotized by his mere presence, making you think he could make you do almost anything.

“Don’t you?”

He shakes his head confidently, a soft giggle escapes his lips. “You’re so cute.”

You clear your throat. “Am I?”

“Yeah,” his body turns completely to sit up parallel to you, “You don’t know how much I’m trying to control myself right now.”

“Then don’t,” you respond curtly, “I can handle myself.”

He nods. “I’ll take your word for it.”

His lips fit around yours in an instant. He moves with assertion. You were completely under his spell, unwaveringly in his possession. His hand moves to cup your face, his tongue finding easy entry after biting down on your bottom lips. The top of his nose tickles yours and you find yourself grasping his sides. Your legs pull up from the floor and anchor on his sheets. Chan’s free arm moves to take hold of your waist, forcing you chest to chest.

He parts from your lips reluctantly. He stares back at your half open eyes as if waiting for you to tell him to stop. When you’re the one to lean in and match his rhythm from moments before, he’s the one to give in to you. He melts into you until you’re one. You collapse underneath him and he strokes your hair so sweetly. How he kisses is between a starved man and a long time lover; comforting but exciting all at once.

His hand trails beneath your shirt, shivers running up your spine. You feel his smile against your lips as he hums to himself gleefully. “You’re so pretty underneath me, Kitten.”

“You figured that out too?” You laughed nervously.

“I had a feeling. Is that what you like being called? Kitten?”

You caught your lower lip between your teeth. “Not really, but I don’t mind it when you say it.

“Really,” he tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, nuzzling his nose against yours, “that makes me happy to hear.”

His lips fall against your cheeks in peppery kisses then down your jaw, biting and sucking against the untouched skin until it glowed red and purple. His hand at the same time lands on your thigh, massaging your skin. Smoothly, his hands in a cupping shape drags two fingers over your clothed cunt, chuckling darkly into your skin as you gasp. “Fuck Chan.”

He pushes himself up and makes home underneath your pants, achingly closer to the arousal that soaked your underwear. A thin layer of it spreads on the pads on his fingers, pushing them in with the layer of underwear in between. Your abdomen tenses up, but that’s how you knew he did it right. At the same time, his hand traces your jaw before prying it open your lips with his fingers. You let them slip inside your mouth with ease, quick to close around his digits, to which Chan let them pump inside your mouth. He grips your jaw with the rest of his hand, emulating you being full in both ends.

“You like that? You like it when I put my fingers in your mouth?”

You bob your head to nod, feeling his fingers plunge harder into your core as a reward. You moan loudly around the fingers in your mouth, and feel him drag his crotch over your thigh, getting himself off. You are overwhelmed to say the least but not unsatisfied. “You look like you’d do anything I want, am I right about that kitten?”

You nod again, subtle squirming at the height of your excitement.

“Then why don’t you make yourself comfortable and sit on my face for me, hmm? And you can return the favor for me if you like.”

He pulls away from you to give you space. He undresses himself from his plain white tee down to his sweatpants and soon after you follow suit. You ogle at the appearance of his sweat glistening torso, able to trace every deep toned structure by memory, and then match the level of his cock, pointing plainly in your direction, almost screaming at you to touch it.

“Is kitten getting distracted? You need some help undressing?”

He chuckles at your speechless state and comes to your aid. He lifts your shirt from your body, his confidence faltering at your beautiful flushed skin underneath as he looks at you in amazement. His hand glides your slide, thumbing over your erect nipples to see then get harder he squeezed. Pulling away from the trance, he smiles before lowering down and pulling off your pants and underwear, unveiling a glistening beauty that was your cunt. He could feel his mouth watering already.

“I want to eat you out so bad,” he says breathlessly.

Your blood pumping at his words, making you pull Chan flat on the bed. He lays sprawled out with a smile, he beckons you with a simple gesture, and before you know it, you lower yourself over his mouth, tempted by the cock that stood tall in front of you. You feel him kiss along your inner thigh, mouthing at your folds, until that while his smile engorges on your entrance. His thumbs spread you apart and feel your heart flutter at his pace. He had yet to use his tongue but skills did all the talking. You grab hold of his strong, reliable thighs and flatten your body on his.

You hold his shaft for the first time and laugh nervously. “Wow, I’m seeing it in person.”

“I hope I can exceed your expectations,” he chuckles into your heat.

First you take in the shape with your eyes, pristine and perfect just like on screen, then your mouth. You fit half of it inside the best you could, all while drowning to the sound of Chan’s wet love making to your soaked pussy, and bob face down on his length. You lube him with your saliva, transparent ribbons stretching as you pull away. Your hand cups his balls, kneading them like dough, adjusting to his size all too naturally.

While Chan had a delicious time, he grew increasingly aware how better you were at this than he imagined. This only encourages him more, his arms loop around your legs, pulling your body toward him roughly. He flicks his tongue in sharp licks and occasionally switches to devouring its inside like a gourmet meal. His nose buried deep into you, rubbing against the bud of your clit, playful pants leaving his lips.

“Mmh, Chan. Like that please…” you plead.

His nails dig into the flesh of your ass, licking fats and harsh stripes before letting you close up around his tongue. He explores you like he would a venture, ambrosia on his taste buds. On the other hand, you feel the need to catch up. You swallowed his girth, pushing it in deeper, and grind up on Chan’s face. When you reach his base, his hips come to aid, thrusting into your mouth with no remorse. You stabilize yourself on his stomach and let him hit the back of your throat senselessly. Your eyes roll to the back of your skull, vibrating around him from your moans, tears start to swell up in your eyes.

Your muffled voice would echo from the walls, bouncing off every surface, before you came in his mouth, twitching enough that he forces you down on him. He drove you insane with what could do, driving you to pull your mouth off him to gasp for air, it all became too much, but not unwelcome. “P-please cum in my mouth, Chan. I want it so bad.”

Chan lets his mouth rest for a moment, takes the opportunity to take in oxygen and leaves you a last order before he dives back in. “Then put it back in your mouth for me, kitten.”

You do as you're told and force it down your throat, letting it hit far back in your uvula with your thrust until he pours inside you. Your eyes snap shut. You close the opening of your mouth to not let a single drop go to waste. Your cheeks inflate from lack of capacity and you're forced to swallow down what you’ve reined in. You fall to your side on the bed and Chan manages to pull himself up to lock eyes. A sweaty disheveled mess, Chan smiles in bliss seeing how fucked out you’ve become just for him. His fingers land on your lips and gently pull them apart to see your clean work. You stick your tongue plainly out in response, smiling just as bright as he was.

“Tired already?” He teases.

“Maybe, just...how do you do it? For hours on end too?”

“I just know what I’m doing, kitten. Don’t worry about the next round, I’ll do all the work,” he crawls on top of you, smoothing your frayed hair, “and while we’re at it, I can turn a camera on and we can have a little something to ourselves.”

919 notes · View notes

hermannsthumb · 5 months

Note

omg could we see #62 from the winter prompts list?

62. you’re my college roommate’s sibling/best friend and you’ve come to visit for a week since you’re done school but unlike some people, I have three more finals to study for so kindly fuck off

from winter writing prompts here

stuck on some of my other wips so i'm digging back through my old unfilled winter prompts!! from. well. 2018. can you believe i've been writing fic this long. insane.

enjoy some dumb (sort of?) college boys newmann! I decided to cheat with the prompt a little (a lot) so I could work it to be conceivably not an AU but instead set pre-canon, though I realize it techhhhnically screws around with the newt/herm penpal backstory just a tiny little bit....

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To be honest Newt’s probably paying more for year-round university housing then he would be in rent at an actual apartment at this point, but details like that get a little screwy when you start college significantly before your eighteenth birthday and grow up on campus. His dorm holds more sentimental value than his childhood home at this point. I mean, it technically is his childhood home. Newt did try the spring of his twenty-first birthday to finally move out, but he spent exactly two minutes poking through a Cambridge housing group on Facebook before it made him want to die and he gave up. At least this way he doesn't have to buy new furniture.

He has enough good will left with administration despite all the shit he's pulled to leverage certain things like that in his favor, and he struck a deal to keep his dorm in exchange for letting campus housing utilize it as an actual dorm from time to time. (Which is to say, Newt is kind of broke and needs to save money from his stipend every now and then for, you know, groceries, so he can grit his teeth and deal with a roommate when the time comes.)

His roommate at the moment is a German exchange student (maybe one or two years younger than Newt) who’s currently enrolled in a year-long study abroad program to mess around with electrical engineering—interesting enough guy with just enough neuroses and weird family issues to make Newt feel like the most well-adjusted twentysomething in the world. It's a great ego boost.

Anyway, it’s convenient. There are like three Dunks of varying quality to choose from at any given moment, and Newt only has to walk ten minutes max to any lecture hall to give class. This is especially nice on stupidly cold and snowy days like today where even a ten minute walk feels like too much.

The door to Newt’s dorm is slightly ajar when he finally gets home. In normal circumstances this would make Newt pause and think for a few seconds before stomping inside—rules of horror movies or whatever—because if his roommate is anything, it’s particular with things like that. Shoes off at the door, dishes left in the sink on a firm one-day-max limit, doors very much locked when they leave to protect all their super important possessions from being stolen, like the refurbished Playstation 2 Newt got off eBay or the Brita filter Newt also got off eBay. Very luxurious stuff.

But Newt’s cold and hungry, so he stomps inside anyway. He does kick his boots off, though—just because some people decided to stop following the dorm rules doesn’t mean Newt will—and makes sure to click the door shut behind him carefully. “Hey, dude, you home?” he calls down the hallway. Nothing. His roommate, Bastien, is usually in class at this time of the day, but finals have turned their schedules upside down, so who knows. He wiggles out of his winter coat and hangs it next to an unfamiliar green parka on the wall hooks (maybe Bastien went on a shopping spree?) and tries a second time. “Uh, you know you left the door open?”

Newt's glasses are splattered with melted snow, and he dries them on the hem of his sweater as he fumbles with the door to their room—and is more than a little surprised when he sees the blurry shape of Bastien sitting primly on the edge of his bed, smoothing out his clothing like he’s just woken up from a nap. His bed as in Newt’s bed. Newt startles backwards. “Oh,” he says. “Um. Hey?” Has he fucked up? Are they having a roommate talk about something? …Preceded by Bastien inexplicably taking a nap in his bed?

He pushes his glasses back on. The dark-haired blur on his bed comes into focus, and though the sharp angles, bad haircut, and vaguely sickly pale flush are reminiscent of Newt’s roommate, everything else about him is different, from the brown eyes to the wide frown. It’s a Gottlieb, no question, but which one Newt’s not sure. He knows there are at least three more of them, a concept which has always struck fear into Newt’s heart each time Bastien alludes to having siblings. “Hello,” the guy on Newt’s bed says. He nods. Very proper. “You’re Newton.”

“…Yeah?” Newt says.

The mysterious Gottlieb is kind of hot, which is the worst part. The whole stern professor look he’s rocking—big glasses, knit sweatervest, slightly too-big loafers—is doing him plenty of favors. Normal circumstances, Newt thinks again, coming home to a hot nerd lounging in your bed? It might almost make him believe in a higher power. It’s taking a significant amount of effort to not start flirting. Then again, he is in Newt's bed, and has been clearly been sleeping in Newt's bed, which feels like a flirtation in and of itself.

“Hermann Gottlieb,” the professor-dude says. He gets to his feet with the aid of a cane, which he’d hooked on one of Newt’s bedposts and offers a hand out to Newt like they’re both eighty years old. Mildly bewildered, Newt takes it. He's treated to a firm handshake. “I assume my brother told you to expect me? I let myself in. I hope that’s not too rude of me, but it was rather cold out.”

“Uh,” Newt says again. He’s a lot more…British than Newt expected. Very posh BBC-miniseries about posh English people with large country estates. Especially compared to Bastien, whose first language is clearly German and is very much not British—it’s just not exactly what Newt was expecting. “I mean—he didn’t totally tell me you were coming. Or, at all.” Hermann drops his hand. “I guess he could’ve mentioned it and I just forgot.” This is probably what happened. Newt’s been a little busy lately.

He decides to address the elephant in the room next, the bed thing, and determine if it was a deliberate choice or not. Maybe Bastien has made Newt out to be so irresistible in whatever he’s reported back to the Gottlieb family that Hermann decided to try his luck. This is definitely not the case, but Newt can pretend. “You’re on my bed,” he continues, and points across the room. “Bastien’s is that one.”

“Oh,” Hermann says. He looks mortified in a properly stiff-lipped way and almost trips over himself to cross the tiny dorm room, and for a split second Newt sees a different Hermann behind the dress shoes and exaggerated formalities: an awkward twentysomething probably barely older than Newt playing dress-up to be taken seriously. The belt he’s cinched to the last notch around the oversized waist of his tweed pants is stiff and cracked in places. Bastien mentioned once that one of his brothers is a math whiz who’s followed an accelerated academic path not entirely unlike Newt’s, and Newt suddenly has a strong hunch he’s looking right at him. “I’m—I’m very sorry. I didn’t realize. My flight only just got in, and the time zones—I was a bit tired.”

“No worries, man,” Newt says. He tosses his tote bag onto the Hermann-sized indentation in his bedspread and kicks his docs off one at a time, while across the room Hermann twists the handle of his cane between his hands. “You want some coffee or something? Bastien is usually out until late on Thursdays, so it might just be us for a while, sorry.” He pulls the sweatshirt he’d slung on his desk chair that morning down over his head and straightens out his glasses.

The offer for coffee is a somewhat-pitying lifeline Newt is decent enough to throw out, which he has a feeling both of them understand. Hermann seizes it desperately. “Coffee would be nice,” he says.

He trails after Newt into the kitchen. Apartment-style or not, it’s still a campus dorm, and the kitchen space is cozy at best and cramped at worst. Hermann plasters himself against a row of cabinets in a heroic effort to stay out of Newt’s way as Newt dumps some coffee grounds and water into his cheap pot and digs two mugs out of the cupboard. They avoid making eye contact at all costs while it percolates. “We have, like,” Newt gestures vaguely at the doorway, “a couch? If you wanted to sit? And not stand here?”

“I don’t mind,” Hermann says.

Newt kind of minds, but whatever, he can deal. He pours soy milk into one mug in preparation and offers some to Hermann, who shakes his head. The coffee drips slowly into the pot. Newt thinks about the stack of ungraded finals tucked into a binder in his tote bag, the other stack waiting on his desk, and the final final he still has to proofread and send off to Copytech for, like, seventy copies by tomorrow. “So, Hermann,” Newt says, and tries to think of a polite way to ask why exactly are you in my apartment during finals week? Does the guy not also have finals in England or wherever? “Are you just visiting your bro for fun, or…?”

Hermann’s face twists with a sour expression. “For a week,” he says. “Not all that willingly. I’m in town for a conference and I won’t have my hotel room until tomorrow morning. Bastien offered to let me use his couch for the night.” He adds hesitantly, “I’m due to give a presentation on Tuesday.”

A lecture: almost definitely the math whiz, then, unless overachieving is a family trait. Newt will circle back to that later. He’s not exactly a math expert, but you kinda can’t really pick up that many STEM doctorates without having at least a basic (or, you know, decently advanced) understanding of, uh, everything about math, and he’s keen to hear what Hermann plans to lecture on. “I’ll try to stay out of your hair,” Hermann adds quickly. “I know you’re busy with final exams and whatnot.”

“Ugh, no kidding,” Newt says. The coffee finally finishes with a few rattling huffs, and Newt carefully pours it into their mugs and shoves the less-chipped one over to Hermann. “I still have another left to go,” he continues. “I got stuck with three whole sections this semester, it sucks. I think they just wanted to get back at me for—well, um, I caused a minor fire in the lab last year and they had to evacuate a few buildings, and I put it out right away because I'm the king of lab safety, but whatever, everyone lost their shit anyway. It’s going to take me forever to grade everything.”

Hermann frowns at him, and Newt wonders exactly how much Bastien has shared about his American roommate—or in this case how little. “Not a student,” he explains. “Dr. Geiszler, technically, but do not call me that. I managed to convince the biology department head to convince student life to let me keep living on campus after I—well, I guess I technically graduated undergrad a while ago. After I wrapped up my first PhD?”

“Ah,” Hermann says, and the edges of his sharp cheekbones going the faintest shade of pink. “I’d assumed—Bastien didn’t mention that, is all.” His eyes flick over Newt twice, scrutinizing him and lingering on his oversized hoodie, a DIY screen-print job bearing the latest logo for Newt’s band that he tried valiantly to sell at their last show. “First PhD? Exactly how old are you?”

“Twenty-two,” Newt says. “I skipped a grade. Or ten. Would not recommend it. Anyway, Hermann, you’re some sort of super-genius, right? You were doing calculus in your crib or something?”

If Newt’s right about which brother Hermann is, that means—compared to the rest of his family—Bastien has alluded to Hermann’s existence in all but name three whole times. By familial standards Newt can only assume that means they’re practically BFFs and probably send each other birthday cards every year. If possible Hermann might be even more reserved than Bastien, though, and it’s making Newt want very badly to prod him a little more just to see what happens. Get him to poke his head out of his shell or something. “That’s pretty impressive, you know,” he adds.

Hermann flushes pink for real this time, obviously pleased with the compliment, and Newt’s equally pleased to see him hold his head a little higher. They’re getting somewhere. “It’s not precisely that dramatic,” Hermann says. “But, yes, er—I started university at a rather young age. Comparatively. Before that, my father sent me abroad when I was eight for my schooling. I’d shown a knack, I suppose, for mathematics, and…”

Abroad—Newt guesses that explains the different accent. Not unlike Newt himself. He wonders if Hermann’s family ribs him for the lapses in his German the way Newt’s family does (America is rotting your brain, Newt!), though maybe somewhat less gently. “And?”

“I’ll finish my doctorate in the spring,” Hermann finishes, with a small smile.

“Dr. Gottlieb,” Newt says. “Nice. I like the sound of that.”

Hermann suddenly spills a large amount of coffee down the front of his sweater. He doesn’t seem to notice, though his ears (which stick out just a little) do go red, so Newt doesn’t say anything.

It’s unfortunate how cute Hermann is. Newt briefly debates the ethics of hitting on your roommate’s hot British brother and whether or not it breaches some sort of sacred roommate code. On the one hand, Hermann is only here for a week, so it’s not like they can get up to too much, and Bastien himself will be packing everything back up for Germany in like, six months tops when his study abroad program ends in the spring anyway. And besides, it’s not like Newt and Bastien are tight or anything like that. On the other hand—I mean, that would be weird, right? You can’t just hit on your roommate’s hot British brother, especially not when he's sleeping on your couch for the night.

Newt has over a hundred final exams to grade, and a suitcase to pack for his own trip (albeit one that’s a maybe-thirty minute ride on the commuter rail) out to his dad’s for the break. He kinda wants to hit on Hermann.

He’s going to hit on Hermann.

“Sooooo,” he begins, “you got any plans, or—?”

And it’s then that Hermann’s cell phone begins to buzz in his pocket. “Ah,” Hermann says. “One moment—apologies.” He pulls out a battered flip phone that looks like it’s been passed down from at least two other people and squints at the screen. “My brother,” he explains, “at last. He’s finishing up at the library and wants to meet for dinner.”

“Oh, right,” Newt says. “Of course. Duh.”

Hermann closes his phone slowly and hazards a small, but considering, glance at Newt, and Newt has a fleeting suspicion he’s not the only one weighing the pros and cons of risky flirting. He might just be flattering himself, though. “…Would you like to join us?” Hermann says. “I’m sure Bastien wouldn’t mind. It might be…” He works his jaw a few times. It’s incredibly cute. He’s clean-shaven in a way Newt hasn’t managed to be since he turned seventeen (the Geiszlerian curse of thick facial hair whether you want it or not), and it makes him look even more like a weird kid trying very hard to be an adult. “Fun.”

It's a bad idea. Hermann’s only here for a week, and he’ll clearly be busy with his conference and his big talk and all that, and then they’ll be back on opposite sides of the Atlantic probably forever—Newt would just be setting himself up for heartbreak. And six months of awkwardly dodging his roommate, which is possibly worse. Ugh. Being responsible sucks. “I shouldn’t,” he finally sighs. “I have to finish—”

“—your finals. Of course,” Hermann says. “Yes, of course, I’m sorry. I forgot. I’ll let you be.” He sets his mug on the counter by the sink. “Thank you for the coffee.”

“Sure, dude,” Newt says.

Hermann works his jaw again, chewing at his lower lip, and then says so quickly Newt almost misses it “If you’re around next Tuesday, perhaps you would like to see my talk?”

Newt tries very hard to be chill. “Yeah, totally,” he says. “That would be awesome. I think I can make it.”

Hermann nods solemnly. “Excellent. I’ll ask Bastien to give you the details later.”

He finally begins to dot at the coffee stain on his sweater with a handkerchief he pulls from a different pocket, and Newt squeezes past him to rinse their mugs out. (No dishes in the sink overnight.) His elbow brushes against Hermann’s as he dries them with a dishtowel. Hermann makes no effort to move away from him, and this close he smells like stale cigarette smoke. Newt can imagine him standing out in the rain in a dreary English landscape somewhere, maybe in the oversized coat he saw hanging by the door, scowling and crushing cigarette filters beneath his cane.

There’s something strangely magnetic about Hermann.

“Hey, listen,” Newt says. He dries his hands off on his pants. Hermann looks at him, abandoning his efforts to clean himself up. “You wanna swap emails or anything…? Maybe we could talk. Collaborate on, uh, something.” He has absolutely zero idea of Hermann’s subfield so he doesn’t know exactly what they’ll collaborate on just yet, but he’ll think of something. Make some notes during the Tuesday lecture. Newt has three PhDs and counting, he can come up with an excuse to talk to a cute boy, okay, he’s not twelve. He’d ask for Hermann’s number like a normal human being if he could dream of affording the international texting rate.

Hermann gives him another stiff nod and the shadow of a smile, which Newt hopes means an enthusiastic yes, Newt, I’d love to be your penpal!, so Newt fishes a pad of paper and a pencil out from the kitchen junk drawer and they take turns printing their emails out as neatly as possible. Hermann folds the slip of paper with Newt’s in half and slips it into his top pocket. “It was very good to meet you, Dr. Geiszler,” Hermann says, and he offers Newt a parting handshake.

What the hell, Newt thinks, and takes it.

It takes ten months and a split in reality at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean for Hermann to get around to emailing Newt. Newt expects they’ll have a lot to collaborate on in the near future.

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag

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xocasper · 2 years

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Sunset and Vine

Pairing: Frank Iero x Reader Summary: Kinktober Day Four - Hate Sex Warnings: NSFW content Tags: hate sex, degradation, begging, oral sex Word Count: 3756 A/N: My pre-August writing makes me puke, honestly. It's a crime. Unfortunately, it's one of my only Frank fics. I'll definitely write another one after I finish the Ray fic I'm working on. Anyway, the title is a reference to Taylor Swift, not geography. Enjoy!

Having Gerard as a roommate was great in many aspects. He wasn’t loud or overly messy, and he didn’t take long showers–if any–keeping the bills low. It was nice to have someone to talk about your problems with, especially someone as empathetic as him. Living with him was so close to perfect that it seemed like any issue could be overlooked. Unless that issue was his best friend, who was practically a third roommate at this point.

Frank was probably at your apartment more than you were, hanging out with Gerard as often as he could. This would be fine if he wasn’t the most insufferable person you’d ever met, priding himself on his ability to infuriate you. Whether it was waking you up at night by talking too loud, or having the energy of a Jack Russell terrier at eight in the morning, having Frank around always sparked conflict.

Aside from his rowdy behavior, he was also a total asshole. The second he realized you disliked him, he made it his life’s mission to push you over the edge. His tactics varied from playground insults to minor “accidents”, which included shoving past you in the hallway, eating food that you swore you marked, and other intentional inconveniences.

You weren’t much better, often retaliating just as bad. It was mostly bickering and occasional roughhousing, but nothing worth leaving over. Gerard usually got in the middle of things, making futile attempts to settle arguments before someone got hurt. In addition to this, he was always trying to convince the two of you that the other was tolerable, nice even. Until it showed though, you took his convictions with a grain of salt.

Today you had less patience than usual, getting little sleep the night before. It was a Saturday so you had more than enough time to nap, but you couldn’t seem to relax. You could live with that, but things got worse when you went to the kitchen, realizing quickly that you had forgotten to go grocery shopping. Despite the rough morning, you tried to keep an open mind.

Shopping wasn’t awful, but the lines were. After waiting in line for ten minutes, the lane closed, leaving you to wait another ten minutes in another line. Somehow, your day hadn’t been troublesome enough. The universe had granted you fifteen minutes of traffic on the way home, because heaven forbid you try and stop for coffee.

Coffee that you spilled as you got out of the car, effectively staining your pants, warranting a frustrated outburst, or at least a few tears. As if this wasn’t enough, you walked all the way up to your floor, arms full, with no key. Not only had you locked your car keys in your car, but also the key to the apartment, resulting in ten minutes of knocking and calling Gerard.

Thankfully, he came to your rescue, greeting you at the door with an exhausted expression, one that quickly turned to worry as he saw the distress on your face. He didn’t say anything at first, taking the bags and placing them on the kitchen counter before returning to you with open arms. It was nice, cathartic, to be held, and you were more than grateful for his compassion. However, you still wanted to take your anger out on something, feeling a strong urge to go punch a hole in your wall like an angsty teenage boy.

Gerard wasn’t going to let you do that though, unpacking the groceries and telling you to change into clean pants. When you came back in a fresh pair of sweats, he already had the coffee maker brewing, proudly presenting you with a cup as you took a seat at the counter.

“I take it your morning went well?” he joked, blowing away the steam while you held your head in your hands.

“Gerard, I’m running on three hours of sleep and eight ounces of coffee, and my keys are locked in my car. So yes, my morning was fucking wonderful.”

He breathed a small laugh, shaking his head as he took a sip of coffee. “It’s only eleven, so you’ve still got time to do something fun. Besides, it’s Saturday, which means no work. At the very least you can take a nap.”

His suggestions were sweet, but you’d already failed to go back to sleep, which took that off the list. “Actually, one of my friends is dragging me to some bar tonight,” you groaned, remembering the promise you’d made to her after she spent two weeks begging you to go.

He gave you his condolences before downing the rest of his cup and returning to his bedroom, leaving you to dwell on the rest of your day. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t seem to lighten up, the afternoon dragging on slower than usual. At least you had your keys now–thankfully Gerard kept a spare–so that took some weight off your shoulders.

You had gotten a couple of texts from your friend, ensuring that you were still going and practically begging you to put some effort into your appearance. More to prove yourself than anything, you reluctantly hauled yourself out of bed to get dressed up, hoping something short and scandalous would be the cure to your problems.

A few hours had gone by since something detrimental had happened, leaving you to believe that the storm had passed and that you could enjoy your night. You tried to stay positive as you picked up your friend, fortunately arriving at her place with less traffic than earlier. She was standing outside already, breathing a sigh of relief at the sight of you, who had tried harder than usual to look nice.

Things really seemed to be looking up, as you arrived at the bar with no accidents or road rage, and you were actually starting to look forward to the night. Plus, dressing up proved to be some help, as you were chatting it up with some guy at the bar who couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from you.

Maybe this was good–you had a pretty poor day, so a hookup wasn’t an awful idea. He was cute and seemed interested in you, but right as you were going to take things further, your friend stumbled over, slurring something about how she had puked on someone’s shoes.

Lo and behold, there was another girl, drunk off her ass, wailing about her ruined heels. Of course, when things began to seem okay, there had to be some sort of sabotage, bringing you right back to square one. You muttered a quick apology to the guy, who waved you off and moved on to someone else, rubbing salt in the wound.

Thankfully, you hadn’t had much to drink, leaving you much more sober than your friend and a much safer driver. You tried your best to keep her calm while she cried about ruining your night, and how there was this “totally sexy guy” that she was in love with–despite forgetting his name–and how she would never see him again. As much as you loved her, it was exhausting, and you were more than happy to walk her inside and get her a glass of water before heading home.

All you wanted was to go to sleep, but the second you walked inside, you knew that wasn’t happening. Instead of a quiet apartment, you were met with the unpleasant sight of Frank, sprawled out on your couch.

“Oh my fucking god, you’re here?” you asked, exasperated.

He rolled his eyes, “Are you always such a whiny bitch?”

Gerard looked back and forth between the two of you, concerned and slightly frustrated as he tried to diffuse the situation. “Hey, I didn’t expect you to be home until later, and I can tell that something happened, but Frank isn’t here to bother you.”

“Look, I’d rather gouge my eyes out with a rusty spoon than come home to this,” you assured him, motioning to the mess that was Frank, shirt rucked up and a beer in hand, looking disheveled and a little buzzed.

“Says the one dressed like a back alley whore,” he scoffed; his words would be hurtful if you hadn’t heard them a million times.

“Don’t you moan on stage for people?” you snapped impatiently.

Frank sneered, “You’re just pissed that it’s not for you.”

He was insufferable, absolutely awful in every way, shape, and form. After the day you’d had, you barely had it in you to not take a Louisville Slugger to his knees. The grin he wore as he fueled the flame made it worse, ignorant and mocking as he waited for your insufficient response.

“You’re vile,” you spat, slipping your shoes off and having half a mind not to chuck them at him.

“But I’m right.”

Finally, Gerard piped up. “Alright let’s not do this right now. You go chill out for a bit,” he instructed, pointing at you. “And you, stop instigating them.”

“Fine,” you huffed, sauntering off to the bathroom to shower off the lingering grime from the bar.

As previously mentioned, a perk of living with Gerard was the nearly endless supply of hot water. His hygiene—or lack thereof—meant you could take long, hot showers without any complaints. This was especially helpful after days like these, the warm water cascading down your body, taking your problems with it as it whirlpooled down the drain.

You weren’t sure how long you had spent in there, but it must’ve been a while as the wretched sound of Frank’s shouting had died out. Hopefully, he had left, and realized that he also had somewhere to live. At this point, you should’ve made him start paying rent, he spent enough time here anyway.

Unfortunately, he was still hanging around, making his presence abundantly clear after you finished blow-drying your hair, banging on the door far harder than necessary.

“Could you be any louder?” he griped as you opened the door, eyes lingering on your bare skin, body barely covered by your towel.

“My eyes are up here,” you snapped, annoyed solely because it was him.

“I know where they are,” he said, eyes narrowed mockingly.

”Is Gerard still here?” you asked as you pushed past him, heading off to your room with him trailing after you, sticking around in the doorway.

He knew you were attractive, but it was nearly embarrassing how difficult it was to focus on anything else, watching closely as you shuffled over to your dresser. “No, he went to get food, what’s it matter to you?”

“You actually shut up for once, I figured he must’ve left,” you turned to face him, quickly realizing he was still in the doorway. “Fucking Christ, Iero, have some dignity.”

He grinned as you shut the door on him, heading back to the living room while you changed away from prying eyes. When you finished, you had little choice but to sit next to him, now hungry upon the mention of food. Staying in your room wasn’t the best option when there was a 5’6 toddler in your living room, so you settled on the opposite end of the couch.

“You’re really wearing that?” he asked in distaste, receiving an eye roll.

“They’re fucking pajamas, yes, I’m wearing them.”

“Okay,” he said passive-aggressively, raising his hands in defense. “Better than whatever you wore earlier.”

Impatient didn’t even cover how you felt at this point. “How in the world are you friends with Gerard?”

“How are you his roommate?” he fired back.

“Because I’m not an insufferable douchebag.”

“And I’m not a priss, so it seems like he can put up with anyone.”

This didn’t help, leaving both of you equally pissed off. “Look, I’ve had a pretty awful day, and now I come home to this,” you motioned at him. “In my living room. Go back to the fucking dog pound, Frank.”

“Did anyone ever tell you that the world doesn’t revolve around you? As far as I’m concerned, you pay half the rent. So no, I’ll be staying,” he said, breath stalling as he realized just how close the two of you were.

You hated how attractive he was, from the way he spoke to his appearance, boyish and effortless. It was clearer up close, which only upset you more. “Get the fuck out of my apartment.”

He huffed a short laugh, breath fanning across your skin from the close proximity. “Is that what you really want? Or are you actually dying to be fucked? I know you think about it,” he said cynically. “Quit being a bitch all the time and maybe you’ll get what you want.”

“Shut up,” you told him, burning up as he carefully placed his hand on your jaw.

“C’mon, you can do better than that,” he mocked you, thumb brushing across your parted lips, and lightly pressing it against your tongue. “You’re so much sexier with your mouth shut.”

Maybe it was lack of oxygen, or the weight of your day, or maybe even the two shots back at the bar, but you could barely think as his thumb left your mouth, swiftly replaced by his lips. You had no issue kissing back though, coming to your senses just enough to gain some control. His hands flew to your waist to pull you closer, yours tangled in his hair.

Frank was an outlet, and you could project all your frustration and anger onto him–he deserved it. When you pulled away, his arrogant grin returned, and you gave him a sharp glare before kissing him again.

His kisses were rough and carnal, wasting no time parting your lips once more and gliding his tongue against yours, smooth and assured. You were on fire, and as much as you hated giving in, he was irresistible.

“We are not doing this on my couch,” you told him, panting softly.

“Why? Don’t want Gerard to see you getting fucked like a whore?”

It turned you on more than you’d like to admit, ignoring him and pulling him towards your room. The second the door shut, he was back on you, hands meeting the bare skin of your waist as he held you, fingers digging into your sides with more aggression than you deemed necessary. He slid your shirt off and pushed you back onto the bed, leaving you surprised that he was even more attractive when he was on top of you. Frank, however, hadn’t stopped thinking about this since you came out of the bathroom, his gaze fixed on your half-naked form.

You grew impatient in the few seconds he spent idle, snapping at him. “Can you hurry up? Or will I have to get myself off without you?”

With a scoff, he pulled off his own shirt, chest showcasing a handful of tattoos, arousal coursing through you at the sight of them. “Can you be patient for two fucking seconds?” he glowered at you.

“Maybe if you weren’t so slow, I wouldn’t need to be,” you bit back, quickly cut off by his lips on yours, his fingers tracing the waistband of your pants before shucking them off.

Everything was quick from there, Frank’s palms warm against your thighs as he pushed you up against your pillows. He nipped at your skin, sucking and biting at your chest, leaving light blemishes as he went, smoothing over each one with quick flicks of his tongue.

“For as much as you run your mouth, I thought you’d know how to use it,” you said, earning a gentle bite in response, Frank perking up as you let out an involuntary moan at the sudden sharpness.

He let out a dry laugh, “You’re in for a real surprise, then.”

Frank proved himself right as he settled between your thighs, making quick work of your panties before resting your legs over his shoulders, and placing his hands under the swell of your ass. His ego grew at the sight of you, splayed out and desperate to be touched, dripping with arousal mere inches from him. He could hear the way your breath caught in your throat, anxiously waiting for relief. Your subtle shifts didn’t go unnoticed either, Frank relishing in your attempts to get closer to him. Finally, he leaned in, tongue running flat as he tasted you, feeling his jeans grow tighter as you arched into his touch.

It was almost embarrassing how eager you were for him, but anyone would be with the way his tongue moved, lapping with a motive. He was a bit shocked to be enjoying himself around you, but he was between your legs, after all, listening to every vulnerable noise you made. It was enough to make him pull you closer, sucking lightly on your clit as you attempted to grind against him.

“You know,” you started, cutting yourself off with a moan as he worked his tongue at a merciless rate, undoubtedly to shut you up. “You’d be so much more tolerable if you did this instead of talking.”

He almost pulled away, ready to shoot back a comment about how you would also be more tolerable if you were sucking his dick, but he selfishly believed his mouth had better use between your thighs.

“Frank,” you whined, rocking down against him as he pulled away for a moment, lubricating the pads of his fingers with your arousal.

The sound of his name on your tongue surprised him at first, but his shock quickly turned to desire. It was easily the hottest thing he’d ever heard, making it a goal to earn every noise he could. Every moan increased tenfold as he slipped his fingers inside of you, moving slowly before picking up an even pace. His tongue was a fierce contradiction, gently licking at your clit while his fingers curled quicker, the contrast sending an orgasm rippling through you.

With quick strokes of his tongue, he cleaned you up, pulling every last sound from you. Hastily, he climbed up the bed, itching to get out of his tight jeans. For once, you had nothing to say, too focused on catching your breath.

“Open,” he instructed, biting back a moan as your tongue lolled out.

He pressed his slick fingers to it once more, but this time you closed your lips around them, sucking and flicking your tongue against the pads, causing him to let out a choked curse.

“You’d be so perfect if you weren’t a bitch all the time,” he told you, pulling away as you unzipped his pants.

To your surprise, he stopped you, receiving a look of subtle concern. “What do you want?” he asked, a wicked grin on his face. You paused, looking at him confused.

“C’mon, I want to hear it,” he insisted, waiting for you to speak.

“I’m not gonna beg for it,” you told him, rolling your eyes. He shrugged and started to slide away from you, and you found yourself giving in quicker than you would’ve liked.

“Fine!” you said, and he looked back, waiting smugly for your pleas. “I want you to fuck me.”

It definitely sounded forced, and he could tell that your voice was laced with annoyance. He hummed, “I don’t know, that seemed kinda rude. Try again.”

You looked at him exasperated, trying again with slightly less irritation. “Please, Frank.”

He still wasn’t convinced, shaking his head, grin still plastered on his face. “Man, you’re really bad at this.”

“You’re such an asshole,” you lashed out, kissing your remaining dignity goodbye as you put on a sweet voice for him. “Frank, please fuck me, please. I need it.”

Proudly, he tugged his jeans off. “See what happens when you’re nice?”

You ignored him, too focused on the generous bulge in his boxers, prying down the waistband with nimble fingers. A wave of sheer want crashed over you, head spinning as he hovered over you on full display, Frank quickly noticing how your eyes stayed fixed on him.

“See something you like?” he asked, breath catching as you reached a hand up, gently stroking him.

“Fuck you,” you muttered bitterly, and he was back to scowling at you.

Frank lined himself up before you could react, taking things slow just until he was buried inside of you. “Has no one ever thought to fuck the bitch out of you?” he asked, eyes narrowed in mild distaste.

You opened your mouth to retaliate, but he quickly snapped his hips against yours, any rebuttal you had prepared turning to a loud moan. He built up a rhythm, rough and unforgiving, hooking your legs around his waist to thrust harder, deeper, as you cried out beneath him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, desperate for anything to ground you. He moaned as your nails sunk into his back, the sweet burn encouraging him to pound harder.

With another call of his name, you came undone, legs shaking around him as he thrust a few more times before pulling out. Frank let out a short string of curses as you wrapped your hand around him, pumping him until he came on your stomach.

He laid next to you for a minute, the two of you panting softly from the exertion. It was peaceful, although a bit odd, to have him next to you, without arguing or hard feelings. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as you thought.

“I’m surprised Gerard isn’t back yet,” he said out of the blue, sitting up.

Oh fuck. You had forgotten that he was due home soon.

“Shit, you should probably go then,” you said, eyes barely open at this point. “Could you get a towel?”

He snickered, “Clean it yourself.”

“You’re disgusting,” you said, slapping his thigh. With a melodramatic sigh, he left, returning a few moments and tossing a towel at you.

“Thank you, now get dressed before Gerard sees you stark naked in the hallway.”

He grinned, “So we’re cool now?”

“As if,” you mumbled tiredly, though in your haze you still shot him a smile, listening to him fumble with his jeans as you cleaned yourself off.

Too caught up in your sleepy state, you nearly missed the sound of his soft footfalls and the creak of your bedroom door as it shut, and Gerard’s voice through the walls as he returned a few minutes later. You’d have more than enough time to regret this tomorrow, but at the moment, it seemed like a pretty good end to a pretty bad day.

kinktober taglist: @clichedlovers @halloweenbitch2764 @lubbockshusband @cigarettesandalcohol @couldbegayer1234 @doc-martens-enthusiast @yachiiko @becausethedrugsneverwork @michelethesong @dangerouslittlefairy @chronicallythicc

#frank iero x reader #frank iero smut #mcr x reader #mcr smut

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melonsmysteriousmonarchy · 8 months

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Shawn Mendes x Reader ~ Snowy Days

I woke up the next morning and looked outside to see that it was snowing outside. Living in Toronto, Canada, this often happened. Luckily since I knew about this snow storm yesterday, I went grocery shopping and bought a few extra items in case the power went out. Seems like it didn't today. Being the fact it was 10 degress Farenheit or -12 degrees Celsius, the apartment was probably going to be freezing. Again, luckily, I bought myself and my boyfriend some heating blankets. Always keeps us nice and warm and toasty. I looked over to see the boyfriend sleeping with his arm around my waist, cuddling me close. The warmth is always so precious. "Hey." I heard, looking up to see Brian, mine & Shawn's roommate/friend, at the door. "I turned up the heat since it's snowing. Also I was going to go hang out with Megan (his girlfriend) but again, it's snowing." He said and I nodded. "He's still asleep." I said and he nodded. "I'll be in my room." He said and I nodded as he left. I looked over to Shawn and saw him stretch before rubbing his eyes. "Good morning." I whispered and he smiled. "Morning to you." He whispered back before pecking my lips. I sat up before putting my slippers on. "Where are you going?" He asked. "Going to the bathroom." I said. "I thought you had school today..." He said. "It's cancelled for today since it's snowing and it's 10 degrees outside." I said, going to our shared bathroom.

After doing my thing and brushing my teeth and doing my routine, I changed my pajama shorts to pants and put on one of Shawn's crewnecks. I put on some fuzzy socks and my slippers before heading to the kitchen. I saw Shawn doing something at the stove while Brian was sitting on a stool, drinking a cup of steaming liquid. I walked over and wrapped my arms around Shawn's back. He turned around and kissed my forehead before wrapping an arm around me. "Today should be a lazy day, don't you think?" He asked me and I giggled. "Of course. A lazy, cuddle, and relax day." I said. "Here's your F/H/D (A/N: Favorite Hot Drink)." Shawn said, handing a mug to me. After finishing breakfast, the three of us walked over to the couch and before sitting down and watching a TV show we all liked. After we were done, I sat next to Shawn, cuddling as him and Brian decided to play some video games. Later on that night, we had some pasta and I took a hot bath with Shawn before snuggling to him. I love snowy days so much.

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A/N: Sorry it's so short! I hope you enjoyed this imagine about Shawn Mendes and snowy days! I had an idea and I'm glad on how this turned out! Thanks for reading and I'll see you all next time! Baiiii!

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader

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foxymoxynoona · 2 years

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Tell Me What Changed (Pt. 4)

Banner and lines by the talented @awrkive

Summary: Alex and Jungkook have been best friends since childhood –actual best friends. She is NOT in love with him, for real, and wishes people would stop assuming that. Why does no one question if he’s in love with her? Huh? But it might have to do with his successful fuckboy status, while Alex is very much… not that. Which is fine and doesn’t matter! Until Jimin’s impending wedding leaves her eager for a date and willing to put herself out there, and Jungkook can’t believe what happens next.

Fuckboy Best Friend JK x OC

CW and tags: fuckboy behavior, jealousy, pining, heartbreak, angst, bad language, explicit sex, sexy photos, alcohol, f2l, who knows what else

Read on AO3 here or below

Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Next Chapter

“Now she’s been talking about him nonstop since they got back,” Jungkook vented to Nate as they sorted and stored inventory in the back. “It’s annoying as shit. Like all she wants to do is tell me– just every little thing they did–”

“A play by play of their sex?” Nate asked, grimacing.

“Yeah! I mean it’s not like we don’t ever talk about sex but I don’t go into fucking detail–”

“How much detail are we talking?” Nate interrupted. “She’s telling you he shaves his ball and what his stroke-game–”

“No no not that kind of detail but I know how many times they had sex and how many times she came and that she blew him and he went down on her and that she didn’t expect to like it but she did,” Jungkook sighed and rattled off despite that sick clench of his stomach again. It was stupid. “Look, I’m not queasy about a play by play.”

Nate snickered, “Yeah, I know.”

“But she’s not another guy. It’s not actually like talking to– I’m a guy. She’s a girl. Does she think I just tell her this level of– I mean, we live together, it’s not like she doesn’t know I fuck around and we joke about things a lot, but I don’t come home and give her this serious run of show. I just tell her things to make her laugh!”

“Even if you did, it’s not like she knows the girls, right?”

“Right!” Jungkook shouted, appreciating the point. “I have to be around her boyfriend and know he made her cum four times and she was afraid she’d crush his head with her thighs when he ate her out–” He broke off because Nate had slumped against the boxes laughing.

“Why do girls always worry about that?!”

“Yeah I don't know.”

“I mean the girls I fuck are sticks and they’ll be like ‘oh sorry I don’t want to hurt you.’ Bitch you’re squeezing two spaghetti noodles on my ears. You wish you had that thigh power!”

Jungkook gave a non-committal laugh because he didn’t want the subject to veer off just yet. He wasn’t done venting. He needed to empty himself of these things before he had to go grocery shopping with Alex later today. He was maxed out at the way she floated around the apartment, every few minutes remembering some new detail from her trip she needed to impart on Jungkook.

Great, she had a good time at snooty Lakeville with her formerly-corporate older boyfriend who made her cum four times and was apparently good with his tongue. Cool, Jungkook was good with his tongue too, Hoseok was nothing special. But she talked about him like he hung the moon just because she’d finally gotten a good lay and Jungkook wanted to be happy for her, but it was just too much. It wasn’t like they invented fucking!

“It’s like she forgot that just because we’re best friends doesn’t mean I’m another one of the girls,” Jungkook said. “It’s not just about having to see this guy around all the time and think about the depraved things he did to my friend, it’s also about just TMI of her in that context, you know? I don’t need to know what my roommate’s pussy sounds like–”

“She told you?!” Nate gasped.

“No, I’m being metaphorical.”

“Ahh, ok, dude, I was going to say… but yeah this is a platonic roommate, right? So why is she telling you all of this unless she’s trying to lure you in?”

Jungkook froze, stack of phone boxes cradled in his arms, and repeated, “Lure me in?”

“Like you said, why’s she telling you all this shit? She has girl friends, right? Unless she’s telling you to make you curious, yeah?” Nate wiggled his eyebrows.

Jungkook immediately propelled back into motion and assured him, “No no it’s definitely not that.”

“I don’t know, man, what girl tells her guy friend ‘my boyfriend fucked me this good’ unless she’s hinting ‘think you can do better?’”

“It’s definitely not that,” Jungkook assured him, immediately regretting this conversation now. Nate was an idiot. Total fucking moron, that guy, Jungkook should have known better. The slight embellishments Jungkook had given to the things Alex had actually said, to make it a funnier story to Nate, had confused the guy. It wasn’t like she’d told him what Hoseok’s stroke game was, she’d just said he made her cum four times and she was sore now. He definitely didn’t think she had meant think you can do better, baby?

Although obviously, objectively, he could. He had way more practice than Hoseok, he was sure of that, and while every woman was different, he had a wider sampling. It wasn’t like Hoseok came into this knowing anything more about how to fuck Alex good than Jungkook did; in fact Jungkook knew a lot more about Alex than Hoseok did so–

Not that Jungkook wanted to fuck Alex. Just objectively. In a direct competition of skills, he’d do better. Except for the wild card Hoseok would have, the finger on the scales that would tip the balance in his favor: Alex liked Hoseok, she wanted him, in a way she had never considered Jungkook. Jungkook knew that the more you wanted someone, the better the sex with them was, even if sex in general was great. So no matter how much better he was at fucking, Hoseok would win a competition judged by Alex because she wanted Hosoek to win. She chose him that way.

“Dude you look pissed,” Nate laughed, throwing a box at him. Jungkook caught it, but in doing so dropped several phone boxes.

“Oops.”

“What are you thinking? Revenge fuck?”

“What does that mean?” Jungkook asked, face now shifting from whatever ‘pissed’ expression Nate thought he had seen to one of skepticism. “I’m not going to fuck her– she has a boyfriend–”

“Nah, dude, this is your roommate, you didn’t want to fuck her before anyway, right? I mean fuck someone else and give her the details and see how she likes it! Probably she’ll get all ‘ew gross don’t tell me that,’” Nate explained, mimicking a high-pitched girl's voice in a way that seemed to prove he had not been laid anytime recently.

Jungkook’s head tilted, trying to make sense of this. He didn’t have to fuck someone new to have gross sex details to share. He didn’t think that was the problem. And again, it wasn’t like Alex didn’t already know he was a fuckboy. It’s just that his stories were funny, hers were–

Maybe that was the problem. Maybe she thought because he fucked around, he wanted to hear about his best friend getting railed by her lightweight boyfriend on their hoity-toity trip up to Lakeville. Dude apparently couldn’t even hold his alcohol so his stamina couldn’t be that good. He suspected Alex was just an easy cummer since she’d gone unlaid for so long–

Ok no. NO no no no that was the whole point was that he did not want to start thinking about Alex in any sex-related sense. No! He’d drawn a hard line there basically a decade ago and there was no need or reason to muddy those waters now just because in quick succession she had revealed she wasn’t actually asexual, she now had a boyfriend, and for some inexplicable reason Alex had let him see her in lingerie. Ok, sure, for ‘feedback’ to make sure Hoseok wouldn’t laugh at her.

Obviously the fucker hadn’t laughed at her. Hope you enjoyed it, asshole! That’s my best friend whose weekend you almost ruined getting too drunk! Alex hadn’t confirmed the lingerie was a hit but Jungokok hadn’t expected it to be anything but. It had looked good on her.

“This is why I won’t live with a girl unless I’m married to her,” Nate continued, speaking mostly to himself because Jungkook was barely listening. “It doesn’t work.”

“It works for us,” Jungkook argued.

“Does it? She’s totally forgotten you’re a dude, dude.”

“Yeah but that’s ok. I mean, I’m not a fuckable dude to her–”

“Do you hear yourself? You’re Jungkook Jeon! You’re a fuckable dude to any lady unless she’s your sister, right?”

“Alex is basically like my sister.”

“Then why is she telling you all this gross shit?” Nate pointed out. “That’s like some weird sexual incest relationship or something. That’s some porn shit.” Nate pitched his voice higher again, “‘Hi, stepbrother, can you help me, my thong got stuck in my asscrack. Oh, your hands are all soapy? Maybe you can use your teeth–’”

“Jesus Christ, man,” Jungkook laughed. “Get laid or something.”

“Yeah but you aren’t pissed if I tell you about it, right? So yeah, something’s not right between you and Alex. You gotta stand up for yourself. Remind her you’re a man and you have zero interest in hearing about another man’s game.”

Jungkook realized what Nate was saying did not actually make much sense. He froze again, trying to untangle it. Fine, maybe he was annoyed listening to Alex talk about Hoseok but it was because it was different than talking about generic hook ups. He didn’t mind her teasing him about fucking around, but it was different to have your best friend give you the details of their sex-fueled weekend away with their boyfriend, who they would probably now be fucking down the hall from you on the weekly. Or she’d go over there. She had no problem with his sexcapades but yeah! Maybe he did a little bit just because he also had to look at the guy! He didn’t want to think about another guy cumming on her tits or whatever trash they’d try next! Whatever, maybe Alex didn’t think of him as anything but her brother, but he didn’t want to think these things about his sister!

Nate was pretty useless as an employee and not much good as a friend but something about talking to him did give Jungkook the boost he needed. If Alex started telling him things he didn’t want to know, he'd just tell her to cut it out. He’d remind her she was like a sister to him. He didn’t want to think about her having sex anymore than she had already forced him to!

“Bananas– not the organic ones though,” Jungkook said, looking up from their hastily scratched shopping list.

“Duh.” She actually rolled her eyes at the suggestion that she wouldn’t know what kind of bananas he wanted.

Jungkook started to walk over to the banana display, leaving Alex to push the cart. Instead she hopped up onto the low bar and gripped the handle, whining after him,

“Koooo, push me.”

“You were horizontal most of the weekend, push your damn self,” he argued, back towards her. He hated making the joke about a thing he didn’t want to talk about, but at least sex jokes came natural. He didn’t feel like doing that stupid thing they did sometimes where she rode on the cart and he pushed it, arms around her. Sometimes she’d lift her arms and quote ‘Titanic.’ One time Jimin had seen them do it and insisted there was something wrong with them, a gas leak in their apartment or something.

But he didn’t feel like doing it right now, he just wanted to get the grocery shopping trip done and get home. He’d been on his feet all day and he was tired and usually they went grocery shopping on Sundays so he’d been living off of stale cereal in yogurt and instant rice and kimchi for three days because she’d been gone all weekend. Horizontal.

“Not just horizontal!” she said brightly, completely missing his tone. She gave the cart a shove and rode it over, bashing into the back of his ankles.

“Yeah, ok.”

“Why are you being sulky?”

“Because I’m hungry!”

“Well it’s not my fault you couldn’t feed yourself while I was away. You could have gone grocery shopping on your own,” she pointed out.

“I was busy.”

“Doing what?” she taunted. “Mom said you went to dinner at home. And that you didn’t give away any of my secrets so thanks.”

“They grilled me. You owe me.”

“Eh, you already owed me. You’ve earned my trust back.”

“That’s why you’re telling me every detail now, huh?”

“Yeah I’m not actually worried you’re going to go tell my mom he made me cum–”

“I know how many times,” he interrupted.

Alex’s response was to laugh, “Damn, you’re hangry! OK ok fine, let’s plow through the list so we can get home and feed you. Hehe, plowed like–”

“Alex,” he gave a deep, annoyed sigh to carry her name through the produce section.

She just giggled, “It’s kind of fun pissing you off, actually. I’m barely even telling you anything but you’re getting all pissy because someone beside you is talking about sex–”

“We’re in a grocery store,” he glared, gesturing at the other people in this public space.

“Yeah yeah I know, ok. I’ll dial it back. How was work?”

The question bored him but he answered it and returned the question. Her work bored him too. Everything bored him!

“Hey we’re going to the arcade tomorrow, right?” He suddenly thought of it. Her being gone Monday had totally thrown his weekly schedule off and he realized now tomorrow was Thursday arcade night and she might be working.

She gave him an incredulous look, “Of course we’re going. I mean, unless you’re bailing on me. I have it blocked out in my work schedule.”

“Oh, yeah. Ok. I’m feeling like we need to work harder to get the Slushie machine and stuff. I don’t think the marketing they’ve been doing is enough,” he said, suddenly much more animated by relief. “It feels like there’s a timer counting down on the place, right? I’m worried.”

“You know we could just buy a Slushie machine–”

“Ok moneybags,” he scoffed.

“Let’s see how much they are–” He shoved her hands with her phone down and reached over her to grab a bunch of bananas.

“I don’t care how much they actually are. It’s the principle of the matter. You don’t care about it anymore? I thought–”

“I care, I care,” she assured him.

He frowned, “Or does a Slushie machine not fit the style you want to impress–”

“What is up with you?” she asked. “You’re being all crabby and taking it out on me. What did I do?”

“I’m not–”

“I care about the Slushie machine,” she said. “I’m sorry you needed me here to grocery shop on Sunday and I wasn’t. I’m sorry I blew off the arcade weeks ago but I won’t do it again. Is there something else going on? Are you fighting with a girl? Did instagram suspend your account or something?”

“I have more going on in my life than instagram and fucking girls,” he grumbled. The bananas he had grabbed weren’t big enough so he grabbed a second bunch. They went through a lot of bananas.

“Ok, so tell me about it. What did I miss– you know what? Let’s go to the Starbucks and get something to snack on. Coffee or something. You want anything?”

“You don’t get a discount here,” he reminded.

“I know but this is an emergency. My treat.”

It was suspicious. It made him very suspicious but not so suspicious he wouldn’t accept a treat. So they bought a cookie to share and each got an iced caramel macchiato and fuck the sugar. Jungkook had to admit it did make things feel a little better as they returned to their shopping, side by side, sipping their little drinks. Just two roommates getting their weekly errands done with a nice pick-me-up.

“Ok,” she said. “Now back to what you were saying. Other stuff going on that’s bothering you right now.”

“Huh?”

“You said you have more going on than girls and instagram. News to me so spill, what’s the new thing,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows at him, as she slurped her fucking straw into her mouth.

“Uh…”

“Hello? Earth to Kookoo brain?” When she pulled her drink away to speak, a drop of milk lingered on her lip and he had the sudden and overwhelming urge to just lean down and– ok, it was weird, but it was just the crazy impulse that flashed through him to lean down and lick it off her lip and– well, her mouth would be cold and sweet and milky right now, because of the drink and– he didn’t have a thing for milk or anything, just that her mouth would taste like creamy caramel right now–

“Oh my god, are you sick or something?”

“Sick,” he repeated, meaning his brain that would do that to him while he was talking to Alex of all people!

Ok brain, he realized now. I went too long without getting my balls drained. I get it. He hadn’t even jacked off in the last week! He was cranky and backed up. Alex was right about her assumption that he hadn’t gotten laid and that was probably why he was so sensitive about her weekend with Hoseok. It wasn’t like he actually resented her getting fu– sex. She could have been having sex all this time! He didn’t mind! He just thought she didn’t want it!

But also his brain needed to quit it with the phrase “Alex getting fucked” because it was just too much in the wrong direction. He thought Alex was probably a love-making type of girl, not a getting railed one. They had sex but he’d doubted they’d fucked. The reality of all the excitement over Hoseok, he decided, was that it had probably been pretty tame, mediocre sex, but she had such a low bar for what she should be asking for. He’d nudge her in the right direction to make sure her needs were actually getting met.

Someday.

Definitely not right now.

Her hands were on his face, invading his bubble to check for a fever.

“I’m fine,” he complained and batted her away, “Leave me alone, you’ll give me zits.”

“My hands are clean.”

“You’ve just been banana-handling!”

“Uh I have definitely washed my hands since– oh, you meant…” She trailed off with a loud laugh and bounced away to the next thing on their list: oranges. Obviously she knew the joke she’d made. Her usual brash humor made him grumble, but he quieted it behind a sip of the iced drink she’d bought for him.

When she turned around, she was holding two naval oranges there, but before Jungkook could think of what joke would sound normal and not weird because now he’d seen her nipples and new what her tits looked like in only a flimsy lavender top, she sighed,

“Remember that time May and her friends stuffed these things in their bathing suits and made fun of me?”

“Uh… no,” he lied.

“I still think about that sometimes,” she admitted. “That sucked. I was so jealous of her little AAs.”

“You shouldn’t be. They’re um, nice. You know. At any size.”

“You think mine are nice?” she asked, arching her eyebrow.

“Uh… I, um, objectively speaking–”

“Oh my god, I have a boyfriend,” she laughed. Then immediately sighed and shook her head, “Sorry, I know I’m being so fucking annoying about it right now.”

YEAH! He wanted to yell it but she kept going.

“I guess I just still can’t believe it and I figure I can talk to you about anything. Rebekah and Minxi are both kind of shy about sex stuff… and I’m not on In’am or Sabina’s hot-girl level so… besides I’ve listened to all your sexcapades for years, so I figure you owe me,” she laughed and cradled the oranges against her chest as she tried to tear off a produce bag with one hand. She’d done the whole thing backwards like an idiot.

But Jungkook couldn’t do and think at the same time, and this conversation had him so flustered because now he was remembering her in that lavender thing, he reached for the oranges instead of ripping off the bag which is what he’d meant to do. He grabbed both oranges but a big squish of her tit as well.

“Jungkook!” she gasped. “Right in front of the salad?!”

“Fuck, sorry, I– you can’t– just get the bag before you grab the–”

“Before I grab the what?” she laughed, clearly amused by the whole thing. Jungkook was mortified. He’d never felt mortified in front of Alex but he did right now –well, not since he was a teenager and realized she noticed the random boners he kept popping as puberty wreaked havoc on his system. Or that time he’d been practicing with condoms in high school and had one stuck to his sock and she’d noticed it when she came over. Or that time her car had turned on and grabbed the bluetooth connection to his phone and she’d seen the name of the porn he was in the middle of jacking off to. She’d texted him a picture and six laughing emojis. Ruined his orgasm.

“Oranges, you sick fuck,” he retorted. It came out harsher than he intended it.

But Alex crumpled against the stack of oranges, she burst into such whole-body laughter.

“Oh my god you’re such an asshole,” she howled. “What is wrong with you? Is this really what you’re like if you go a week without–”

“Ma’am, this is a family establishment,” he interrupted, to cut her off because there were children walking nearby but also because he saw a lifeline through to his normal self and reached for it. Of course! He could make outrageous jokes with her and it was fine! Why was he being so weird and cranky?! And how did she know it had been a week for him?!

“It’s so funny when you say shitty stuff with that baby face,” she giggled, wiping a tear from her watery eyes. She reached forward and held the bag open for him to chuck the oranges into. He couldn’t have explained why, but something about the intimacy of manhandling giant oranges into a crinkly bag she held was too much. They locked eyes over the bag of oranges and both started laughing again.

This felt better. Jungkook made sure to bump her around as he picked the best broccoli heads, and she hip-checked him out of the way to reach the ranch dressing, and then they bickered over whether to get normal Chef Boyardee or the healthy one without high fructose corn syrup in it.

“But the healthy one is gross,” she insisted. “You know what boobs are made of? High fructose corn syrup.”

“Yeah, so we don’t need it,” Jungkook argued.

Alex laughed and waved the can at him, “What’s this ‘we’?”

“We got plenty of boobs in the house.”

“Whose? Yours?”

“Mine are nice too! I mean I’m not parading around in a little gauzy purple thing but–”

“Maybe you should open your mind to it,” she said. “You could get a matching one! I got it at that store I made you go with me, the one at the mall–”

“Wait you bought that with me?”

“Yeah. Super sneaky so you wouldn’t see. Like faster than that black bra you helped me steal when we were–”

“Yeah I already know what you’re talking about, it’s not like we steal from Victoria's Secret every couple of months,” he assured her. “Literally the only time in my life I have stolen lingerie.”

“Now you just buy it, huh, Mr. Moneybags?”

“Who the fuck am I buying lingerie for?” he scoffed.

“I don’t know… anyway. Yeah, obviously I wasn’t going to tell you I was buying lingerie.”

“Yeah, obviously,” he scoffed. “You waited until we were home to show it to me. On your body.”

“All right all right, sorry if that was weird.”

He was at a decision point, he realized. The responses he could give fanned out before him like a dialogue tree in a video game. He could tease. He could deny. He could establish a boundary and make sure it never happened again.

He shrugged, “Nah, it wasn’t weird, it’s just fun to tease you about it. You were so nervous about something stupid!”

“My body is stupid, huh?!”

“No, that was my point. How you look in that kind of thing is stupid to worry about.”

“You sound like my mom. ‘You are beautiful Alex and any boy will know that!’ As if I need reassurance from boys to feel good about myself.”

“Yeah just me.”

“Just you and the boy I’m dating,” she agreed as she set things on the belt for him to ring up at the self check out. He opened a couple bags first so she’d be able to squeeze past him and bag while he paid. They’d split the total later.

Jungkook shrugged, “Eh don’t worry too much about him. Boyfriends are replaceable; I am not. Wait, did you show your mom the lingerie–”

“No, of course not! Oh my god, I have boundaries! Just not with you!”

“Ok, good,” he laughed. “Here shrimpie, put the ramen in that last bag so you can carry it. I thought we’d start putting it in the low cabinet so you can reach it with your little possum hands in the middle of the night.”

“You’re such a turd,” she huffed and punched him in the ass. Hard.

“Damnit, Namjoon!”

“Ahhhhh I just tried to help,” he whined. Alex sighed and grabbed chopsticks and began picking out the vanilla beans he had dumped from a jar he apparently thought was dehydrated garlic. Vanilla beans looked nothing like garlic.

“Even if that was garlic, why would you just blindly dump it into the pan?! Besides, we’re using fresh garlic,” Alex scolded.

Beside her Taehyung shook his head, “Don’t bother, Alex. He went from mom to wife, the dude never learned common cooking sense.”

“You guys, don’t be shit. I’m trying to learn.”

“Step one, always stop and think about what you’re doing,” Jimin said, only to squirm and laugh at Namjoon’s look of rage at being lectured by Jimin –Jimin who tended to be on rice maker duty. It was rich coming from Taehyung honestly too, who used to be helpless. But he’d literally taken crash cooking courses in the last three years to learn how to cook to impress the ladies, and it had worked! He’d caught Sabina with those cooking skills. Gotta respect the hustle!

Jungkook reached right over Alex’s head to pull another bowl out of the cabinet above her. It pressed her into the counter, a drawer knob digging right into her ribs.

“Careful, hot stuff here,” she pointed out to him.

“I know, I’m just getting a bowl.”

“I meant the dish.”

“Uh huh.”

“The food dish, not the me dish.”

He gave her a tight-lipped look, bowl now safely in his hands, and assured her, “Yeah. I got it.”

Jungkook did this a lot lately, just would suddenly get all sulky. She hadn’t been able to tease out whether something was up at work or he was just still in his dry spell or what. She’d checked his snap and insta to make sure no girls were bullying him but if they were, it wasn’t on his page. In the past it had never taken her long to crack him; just the right poke and he’d spill everything, sometimes flopped across her lap like a worn out puppy demanding comfort and attention.

Fortunately Jimin also noticed and teased, “Uh oh, baby’s in a bad mood?”

“I’m not your baby,” Jungkook frowned.

“Yeah, we know, you’re mine and you’re hungry and it’s making you cranky,” Alex joked. “Sorry guys, I forgot to feed the baby his afternoon snack before we came here… I know I’m responsible for him and I failed in my sacred duties… here, muffin, eat this.”

“Muffin…” he grumbled, but when she held a piece of chicken to his mouth, he deigned to eat it. His glare gave her the answer as he nodded, “Yeah, it’s good.”

“There, is that better? You just need food. You’ve barely touched your horny DMs. I didn’t see any thirst traps on snap yet tonight!”

“You’re such a something-something,” he laughed, and pretended like he was going to chop her in the stomach, but instead just chased after the piece of chicken she’d been going to feed herself with his mouth like a fish. It felt sort of like staging for a movie; the playful proximity would have been an easy set up to just dart forward and kiss.

If it was Hoseok! Obviously! She wasn’t kissing anyone else! It was just a funny situation, and the premise distracted her long enough he was able to take the chicken after all and give her a smug grin about it.

“The marinade came out good?” Namjoon asked him. Alex had been the one to make it and she awaited Jungkook’s review.

“Yeah, it’s good. We should serve it with the green beans though so there’s some crunch, the chicken isn’t crispy on its own.”

“Yeah, can you saute those? I think Minxi already trimmed them.”

“Yep, right here! My work is done,” she beamed, and handed over the bowl and simply walked away.

Alex set the next batch of dumplings to steam and left the boys to keep an eye on it and wandered off after Minxi. Hobi wouldn’t be here until later; he was staying longer at work to cover for a barista who’d had a last minute family emergency. Hobi always covered; it was sweet and a reminder how much he loved his career, even if it bummed Alex out sometimes that it often meant moved dates or plans. He wasn’t a brain surgeon or something! But she also respected his work ethic.

On the bright side, they’d been dating long enough now that he felt comfortable casually adjusting their plans. It’s not like he had missed anything important! Not that there had been anything important to miss yet but still.

The kitchen was loud anyway and she wanted to just hang out; it’s why she and Jungkook had come early to this dinner party, which was Namjoon’s attempts to take control of the way everyone kept showing up at his house and turn the affairs into less drinking and something more sophisticated. He’d begged them to cook. He wanted to learn.

“Hey are the rumors true Namjoon already started seeing someone?” she whispered to Sabina and In’am.

“What do you mean already?” Sabina answered. “His divorce is finalized! There’s not some magic time he needs to wait.”

“No, I know! I just meant… because he just started looking,” Alex quickly covered her tracks. She thought there was an amount of time you needed to wait before people would whisper about you behind your back…

Exactly like this.

“I think it’s great,” Alex insisted. “I just meant i thought he’d fuck around more before he wanted to bring someone home to us.”

“Some people aren’t fuck-arounds,” Rebeka shrugged. “Some of us are lifers.”

“Yeah totally.” Alex paused, thoughtful, then frowned, “I guess I’m a lifer? Are those my only options?”

“What other options do you want?” Minxi prodded.

“I don’t know,” Alex said quickly, because she didn’t understand how they had gotten here or what was even being talked about. She guessed she was a lifer –she didn’t date around, and certainly didn’t fuck around. But at the same time, it wasn’t like she was already thinking of marrying Hoseok. Well, maybe she’d daydreamed about that earlier, before they started dating. Shit, that didn’t sound right! All her internal thoughts meant was that once Hoseok became a very real guy she was dating, those kinds of fantasies felt a little embarrassing because it felt like she was getting ahead of herself. They’d had a great time in Lakeville and had a couple of dates out or hung out at his place many times since then, they’d had more great sex, things were going great! If they wound up married… well, that would be great! But she wasn’t already really thinking of marriage! She’d basically be a child bride!

“Are you… hyperventilating?” In’am asked, leaning in closer and pressing her hand familiarly to Alex’s jaw.

“I’m just not quite ready to get married yet. I don’t know how you’re doing it. I mean I know you’re older than me but…”

In’am shared a laugh with Sabina, which Minxi and Rebekah awkwardly parroted as well, before assuring her, “That might be a little fast. Do you feel like your relationship is going too fast?”

“No! No, I just am sweating from these questions. Why are we talking about this again? I thought we were going to gossip about Namjoon’s romantic life?”

“Unfortunately I don’t think any of us know anything,” Rebekah sighed and let her chin fall onto her hand. “Where do people keep meeting people? I feel like I have zero prospects unless I want to– no, don’t you say it,” she warned Minxi, holding a finger up.

“Now she has to say.”

“You showed me that dating app you were on…”

Alex was relieved when attention turned that way. She felt like she’d made some mistake without even understanding it. Looking around the circle, she wondered if it meant she was spending too much time with dudes lately. Most of her freetime was with Hoseok and whatever remained was kind of just at home with Jungkook. Maybe she needed to carve out time for more than just texting and the occasional dinner with these girls…

Her phone chirped in her pocket and she yanked it out to see a message from Hoseok saying he was swinging by his place to shower before he came over –understandable since the mocha and espresso tended to seep into your hair and skin while you worked. Her friends were used to her smelling like coffee and chocolate but Hoseok was very particular about how he smelled and looked. No shiny face, no powder behind the ears, and definitely no smelling like work.

There were also notifications for etsy, Tumblr, ebay, Twitter, and Snapchat. She dismissed most of them but opened Snap because the notif mentioned Jungkook was someone who’d shared something. What could he possibly be snapping while he cooked just in the other room?

The selfie had Jungkook looking dramatically to the side, showing Jimin, Taehyung, and Namjoon in the background with the caption: me and bros cooking dinner for some lucky bitches

A next photo showed Jungkook twisting his shirt into his fist to more clearly show the outline of his shoulder and chest muscles and a little bit of skin above his shorts, a few hairs of the treasure trail he’d once admitted to her he wished was more manly and thicker. Taehyung had noticed the photo being taken; he was looking over his shoulder at Jungkook, grinning, devilishly handsome, a casual upstage to Jungkook’s try-hard fuckboy antics. And yet Alex’s attention lingered on her dumb friend. Why was he posting suddenly? Because she’d teased him about horny DMs?

Alex leaned in close to Rebekah and pouted her lips and threw up a peace sign for a photo as Rebekah quickly played along without knowing what for. What a good sport. Alex didn’t often post anything to Snapchat but added it now with the caption: it’s us. We bitches.

“Hey,” Rebekah complained, seeing it.

“You don’t want to be JK’s bitch?”

“Obviously not,” Rebekah scoffed but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. Alex obviously didn’t comment. She had hoped Rebekah’s little crush on Jungkook would fade in time as she saw more of his fuckboy antics, but either Rebekah was intrigued by his behavior –so very different than any guy she’d ever dated– or she’d been able to see the charming, likable greasy Shrek behind the fuckboy antics.

Shrek. Yeah. He was definitely a Shrek.

At the same time her photo posted, Jungkook posted another, holding a spoon of sauce towards the phone camera, eyebrow cocked, tongue pressed to form a bulge in the side of his mouth: want to taste?

Now she laughed and leaned close to show Rebekah, who was whining wanting to know what was going on.

“It’s just a mouthful of sauce,” Alex snickered.

“Um… I think he means cum.”

Alex didn’t know what was funnier, hearing Rebekah say ‘cum’ or Rebekah thinking Alex didn’t get the joke.

“Yeah but just eating a mouthful of that sauce would be gross, so he’s making it seem like a mouthful of his cum would also be gross–”

“Wouldn’t it be?” Minxi asked. “Isn’t a mouthful of anyone’s pretty gross? I realize I’m outing myself here but–”

In’am shrugged, “You get used to it. If you swallow quickly you don’t have to deal with the mouthful part.”

“Or just let it dribble down your chin if you don’t like the taste or texture in your mouth,” Sabina suggested, dragging a finger down her chin. “They like that.”

“All of them?” Rebekah clarified.

“All of them,” Sabina nodded.

Alex made a mental note. She had not given Hoseok a blowjob yet, worried about messing up their enjoyable sex by showing too much of her inexperience too quickly. Hoseok hadn’t seemed bothered at all when she’d admitted she didn’t have vast experience. While he didn’t exactly disclose his own –maybe for the best– he was patient and vocal when she did something he liked. Obviously it was time to step it up soon though, right? He’d gone down on her. She didn’t want him to start thinking she was never going to return the favor, and it would probably take her some time to get good at it!

Obviously she had lied to Jungkook about it when he’d started to tease that she let Hoseok do all the work. And now she was paranoid about it! Damnit, she needed to blow her boyfriend and soon so he wouldn’t be thinking the same thing.

“What are you guys talking about?” Jungkook asked, suddenly leaning down on his forearms on the couch between Alex and Rebekah.

“Your gross cum,” Alex smiled at him.

“It’s definitely not gross.”

“It is though.”

“I don’t think you know anything about it,” he retorted.

“I know what cum is like,” she cried defensively, hitting his arm to try and knock him off the couch.

“Not mine.”

“It’s not special,” she returned.

“This is a lot,” Minxi murmured. “They’re weird, aren’t they?”

“Yes, they’re weird,” In’am assured her. “Nothing new here.”

“The results of the science experiment when a boy and a girl live together platonically for too long…”

“Hey,” Jungkook said, turning his glare to Minxi. “We’re golden.”

“Yeah? You’ve adapted to your new dad?”

“Hobi and I get along fine,” Jungkook said and Alex wondered if it sounded like a lie to anyone else. They still had not spent any real time together since that failed arcade date except for a couple awkward evenings watching tv at the apartment that Jungkook had mostly left during the middle of anyway. Booty calls or whatever.

It wasn’t that they didn’t get along, but she got the distinct feeling from things he said and did that Jungkook still expected Hoseok to be uppity or patronizing or something, just because he was older and had a corporate job, even though he’d given up that corporate job! She thought he was kind of threatened by Hoseok. She understood Jungkook masked shyness and insecurity behind the fuckboy antics but she didn’t see what that had to do with Hoseok! Hobi was definitely not doing anything to try to make Jungkook feel bad about himself.

Hoseok happened to walk through the door right that second and Jungkook shouted, “Speak of the devil! Hey man, glad you could make it!” He turned and went right up to Hobi and threw his arms around her bemused, slightly stunned boyfriend. Of course Hoseok returned the hug, even wrapped his arms tighter around Jungkook and squeezed, as if this was a perfectly normal greeting.

“J-kaaay,” he cheered. “How’s it going, man? Hey, did you find out about that commission competition yet?”

Jungkook’s face lit up, “Oh, Alex told you about that? Yeah, dude, I fucking won!”

“Hey hey, winner J-kaaay,” Hoseok grinned and they high-fived.

Alex sighed and covered her face and slumped down on the couch as all four girls laughed at what they were seeing. It wasn’t that it was fake; obviously Jungkook and Hoseok were both good people and knew they needed to get along for her sake. It just felt like a performance though.

“Yeah, JK is getting along great with his new dad,” she grumbled.

“It takes time,” wise In’am assured her. “At least they’re trying.”

Trying here meant that Jungkook was talking Hoseok’s ear off and he hadn’t even gotten to say hello to Alex yet. It was cute he was so excited about winning after being second each time for like two years now, but couldn’t he wait five minutes?

“Hey, he’s my boyfriend, let me say hi,” she pouted in their direction. Hoseok was still smiling and nodding at what Jungkook said, but came closer to bend down over the back of the couch and kiss her on the cheek. Just the right level of PDA she felt comfortable with in front of her friends.

“--anyway, it’s a nice little payout,” Jungkook said, unbothered. “Maybe I’ll take someone special up to Lakeville now, huh? You can give me some pointers.”

“I think we like different things,” Hoseok told him. Which was kind of a weird response, Alex thought. Jungkook must have thought so too because he immediately stopped talking and tilted his head, eyebrows pinched.

“Do we?”

“He means he gets seasick on the water,” Alex suggested, not sure if that was actually what Hoseok had meant. But it must have been! “But you love the water.”

“Oh, yeah, I do.”

“Hey JK,” Namjoon called. “Something’s not looking right… can you come look?”

“Oh, yeah– hey, why don’t you come too, Hobi? We could use another guy in there who knows what he’s doing.”

“Oh I don’t actually know anything about cooking,” Hoseok admitted, cheeks appling up like when he was bashful about something.

“Oh, I thought Alex was always saying the food at your place–”

“My roommate is great.”

“Yeah, Seokjin is amazing, we should bring him over next time, actually!” Alex agreed.

Jungkook nodded, “Yeah yeah. Ok well, we could use your help in the kitchen.” He shrugged and walked off, but the request was clear.

Hoseok gave Alex a warm smile, an obvious I’m doing this for you message embedded, and waved, “Ladies, nice to see you. I will talk more after I have assisted the men.”

“Good luck.”

“Watch out for Namjoon or Taehyung with knives, for different reasons!”

“Wait, what?”

But he went anyway, and Alex realized she’d been tense for no reason. Hoseok was going to have no problem fitting in here; he already did! He would just be the new guy for a little longer but if Namjoon had some new friend he was going to bring by, Hoseok would then be just another one of the group. That made her really happy to think of. She thought Hoseok’s friends were great, but they did spend more time with them than with her own, and she’d like to be able to go back and forth, or even mingle them!

Mingling was nice. Alex liked not having to choose. She loved that when they all sat down at tables or on the couch to finally eat the food, Hoseok was right there in the middle of conversations. She liked that he had a good memory and would ask people about things they’d mentioned before. He was just so social compared to her. She wasn’t as good at that kind of thing, she just kind of hung back until she found her place, but Hoseok knew how to mold a group. He had such an easy time finding things to talk about with everyone. He was just really so great! He didn’t even fuss when Taehyung and Jungkook teased him during cleanup for suggesting they boil the forks to get the tines really clean.

“It can be hard to wash in between,” he explained.

Namjoon waved his hand, “Nah, it’s good, I have a dishwasher.”

“Ah, ok, but handwashed is cleaner… ok, if you say so!” Hoseok laughed and stepped aside as In’am, Sabina, and Rebekah loaded things up.

“Hobi and Jin keep their place very clean,” Alex explained. “He’s the pro at knowing how to clean anything.”

“So how exactly does that work with you?” Jimin teased.

“I’m not dirty!”

“No comment,” Hoseok grinned, then seemed to realize he had made a different joke than he meant to as Jungkook choked on his saliva and leaned heavily against the counter like he’d been shot and didn’t know whether to cry or puke. “No no I was just trying to make a joke about– nevermind. Nevermind!”

“Adorable,” Sabina snickered. “You two are so cute.”

“He’s rubbing off on you. I thought your room looked a lot cleaner than it used to–”

“No one better be rubbing off on anyone in my house,” Namjoon said to a chorus of boo’s and shoves. Alex grimaced but held back the need to apologize to Hoseok for her crude friends. That’s how they were. She thought they were funny! He’d never seemed too bothered by it anyway.

Suddenly Jungkook reached forward and wrapped his arms around Hoseok, agreeing, “Yeah, man, you gotta be good with Alex, none of that kind of stuff.”

“Hey, you don’t know what I’m into!” Alex jokingly defended. But it was lost, because now Hoseok and Jungkook were both laughing about… Jungkook being her brother and he needed to defend her? They were sort of play-wrestling? Just right in the middle of the kitchen. It was so… weird. She felt like she’d missed something important.

Alex shared a grimace with Minxi and Taehyung. Gross. Had she really understood that right?

“Ok, whatever you weirdos, let’s go do… something else,” she said, trying to wedge her way between them. It was hard to break them up at first and then they were both laughing from the hug-tussle. “You’re both really fucking weird right now.”

“No no,” Hoseok insisted. “Am I flushed? I only had one glass of wine –I’m a lightweight,” he confessed to her friends.

“I’m not,” Jungkook announced proudly.

“Yeah but you’re on your fourth beer or something,” Taehyung pointed out, handing him the bottle.

“Third. I’ve gotta be up early for the gym before work…” Jungkook patted his belly, whether to check the beer volume or fondle his own abs.

“Why are you having three beers at a dinner party?” she scolded.

“Uh, to celebrate my commission win? The guys get it,” he told her, waving his hand to dismiss her and turning to clink his beer bottle with Jimin’s. Alex did not like that dismissal.

“Yeah, right, not like I made you some brownies to celebrate or anything,” she huffed, because she had. Pot brownies. They didn’t do that kind of thing often but it was celebration and they were supposed to enjoy those together soon but if he was going to be weird suddenly–

“Hey baby, I know, don’t pout at me about it. We said tomorrow!”

Hoseok suddenly choked on his water beside her. She turned and pounded on his back until he’d stopped coughing.

“You ok?” she asked.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m great,” Hoseok nodded. “I’ll get some more water I think– were we going to watch a comedy show or something–”

“I’ll get the water,” Alex told him, Jungkook forgotten as she took his glass. “Go get us seats before the other couples take all the good ones.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll clear off the love seat for the three of us,” Jungkook said, backhanding Hoseok in the stomach and taking off.

Within seconds they were alone in the kitchen, and Hoseok leaned close and asked, “Hey uh… does he always call you ‘baby’?”

“Huh?” The retort came out obnoxious sounding even to her own ears.

“He just called you baby and used this… voice…”

“Oh.” Alex rolled her eyes hard. “Yeah, he does that to mock me, goes into his little fuckboy lines. Don’t worry about that, it’s just him being stupid.”

“Ah, ok.”

“You ok snuggling with me while we watch this? Sometimes I laugh too loud… that really witchy one…”

“Remember who you’re dating, baby,” he assured her, his smile taking up his face again as he leaned down to kiss her. “I like that laugh!”

“Oh I remember who I’m dating. I have a midday shift tomorrow…”

“Oh? How convenient… I don’t work until late too…”

“Guys!’

“Guys you’re going to miss it!”

“They’re kissing, leave them alone.”

Jungkook’s voice was clear, “Hey assholes, get your booties in here or I’m farting on all your seats!”

“Does he really get laid all the time?” Hoseok asked.

“Bitches be dumb,” Alex snickered, then quickly clarified, “I don’t mean that seriously, obviously their poor taste is not necessarily a reflection on their intelligence or their worth as people.”

Hoseok laughed all the way to the couch with her, arm around her waist. Jungkook had indeed saved them the two spaces to wedge in with him on the loveseat, though Alex had to shove his legs out of the way. It was a cozy fit for three people, to say the least.

“This only works because you’re the size of a peanut,” he told her.

“Curves of one too,” Hoseok added.

“I will murder you both–”

“Hey-o!” Jungkook laughed and held his hand up for Hoseok to high-five. After a brief hesitation, he did. Jimin started to laugh into In’am’s shoulder and she curled him against her and patted his back,

“There there, babe, the comedy special hasn’t even started yet.”

The comedy special was funny. Alex laughed. Not always sincerely, because she was literally wedged in between two boisterous loud laughing guys who kept jostling each other around her. But she enjoyed it! She was just also glad when it was over and she could squeeze out like toothpaste as anyone who’d stayed for the whole thing gathered their stuff to head out. Namjoon was barely awake in the chair, which was kind of endearing. Sleepy grandpa.

“I’ll follow you home?” Alex asked, nudging Hoseok playfully in the chest. “You ok to drive?”

“Ah, I was optimistic, a friend actually dropped me here, I don’t have my car…” Hoseok admitted, not looking sorry about it.

“Wait, I need a ride home,” Jungkook said, grabbing her arm. “I came with you.”

“Ok you can take my– no, you can’t drive,” she sighed. He nodded, then shook his head. Not trashed or anything, but definitely not going to be driving himself home. Also why should she pay for a cab just so he could borrow her car? That was a dumb suggestion.

“Ok… guess we’re dropping JK at my place first.”

“Would you rather stay at your place?” Hoseok asked.

“Oh. no, we don’t have to– I know you aren’t as comfortable at my place…” They said their goodbyes and headed out, Jungkook trailing silently behind.

“I don’t mind.”

“You’ve never spent the night at my place. Jungkook snores.”

“Close enough to hear?!”

“It was a joke…”

“Ah…”

“Slumber party?” Jungkook asked, suddenly slinging his arms around their shoulders. Or trying to. The height difference left him lop-sided and they all stumbled down the concrete steps to Alex’s car on the curb.

“Yes, but not one you’re invited to, babe,” she teased, poking him hard in the ribs.

“Really? Lame. I’ve got a full poker chip set and a sweet deck of cards, we could play for jellybeans– me and Alex have matching kigurumi.”

She’d wanted to make a joke about how she and Hoseok would be fucking soon but she chickened out and just scolded, “Close your mouth and get into the backseat.”

“Fuck yeah.”

“No not fuck yeah,” she laughed. “God, you are sick! You’re back there alone.”

“Uh huh, ok–”

“Don’t you have a girl to call if you’re lonely?”

“Nah, I think your snap about being the bitch I was cooking for scared them all off tonight,” he lamented as he flopped down into it, shoving her jackets and a beachball and an overflowing bag out of the way. She didn’t have backseat passengers often.

“Didn’t I just send that to you?!”

“Nah, and I added it to mine.”

“Why?!”

“Dunno, man,” Jungkook said and stretched and yawned. “Take me home!”

Alex shook her head but Hoseok was smiling and had his phone out, already sorting through for some music to listen to. That seemed like a great idea. If Jungkook kept rambling, they’d just turn the volume up.

He didn’t, and she actually thought he fell asleep back there, but when she’d glance through the rearview mirror, he was just staring out the window, mouthing along to the lyrics, streetlights flickering across his face.

Jungkook thought it would be less annoying to have Hoseok spend the night at their place rather than have Alex off doing who knew what at his. But it wasn’t less annoying to know they were in her bedroom fucking. He hated that he knew that, even though he couldn’t hear anything from his bedroom.

It was the alcohol, he knew that. He’d had four beers in a couple hours and while he had a high tolerance, he didn’t know why he’d done that. It just made sense at the time.

And now Hoseok was fucking her and tomorrow Jungkook would go to ask Alex something and she’d be sitting on the edge of the bed she’d been recently fucked in and that just bothered him right now. She better change her sheets immediately. He kept his sheets clean for the times she came in and threw herself down on his bed and started snacking or talking or both. Maybe he wasn’t the cleanest guy about everything but he kept his bed clean. He wasn’t going to make Alex roll around in the sweat and sex of another woman.

He couldn’t hear anything. Were the walls really that sound-proof or was she quiet? Was sex the only time of her life Alex was quiet? That was a joke. Or maybe Hoseok just wasn’t as good at this as Alex thought. She had a low bar. There must be a way to make her scream–

Jesus. This dry spell had to end. Jungkook got out of bed and paced his bedroom just to move. It was not normal to be this bothered knowing your friend was getting railed in her bed just a few yards away. Good for her! He’d said that before! He’d say it again! Alex deserved that– a happy relationship, good sex. She was his best friend! He wanted all those things for her!

He just didn’t want to lose her, that was all. He knew what people were like once they got partners. If this continued on, at some point she and Hobi would move in together. They’d get married. Jungkook would get left behind and even if he and Alex stayed friends, he knew it would be different. Hobi would be the first one she called to tell things. Hobi would be the one she bickered with about Chef Boyardee. She wouldn’t want the same intimacy she’d had with Jungkook before because she’d have someone new, and he’d have to put up some wider boundaries so as not to cause problems for her, because not everyone could apparently respect their friendship. Some might be threatened by it. Like Hoseok’s reaction when Jungkook had called her baby earlier. It had made Jungkook want to call her baby a thousand more times, right there, and wrap his arms around his gremlin peanut roommate from hell like he always had been able to without issue, and ask if Hoseok had liked that little purple thing because Jungkook had seen it first and knew exactly how banging–

Goddamnit, what was happening to his brain right now? He should have known Alex getting a boyfriend was going to mess with his head. She was his best friend and he liked their life together and in all honesty he wanted to cry at the thought she was taking a step further from him every day she dated Hoseok. That was the truth. Right now he was pacing his room because there were parts of her life he’d never get to be the closest to her in –namely the one that was happening with her boyfriend right now, but other ones too, romantic ones, marriage ones, this whole life she would have with Hoseok– while she didn’t think of him twice because she was busy getting happily split open by Hoseok’s dick– god, he hoped Hoseok didn’t have a big dick the injustice of it would be too much–

Jungkook left his room under the guise of needing to use the bathroom. It was between their rooms. In the dark, he accidentally wandered too far and had to double back. There were no lights under her door and he couldn’t hear anything, and he realized he was stupid, they’d probably already finished, or maybe not even done anything. But obviously they did do things, even if not right here. But there was something comforting about knowing they weren’t doing things right now–

“Oh.” It was the smallest, softest moan by the time it reached his ears. In all honesty, Jungkook wasn’t even sure he’d heard it. Maybe his brain had made it up.

It didn’t matter. Vague images tried to flash through his mind. He replaced them with women he’d fucked, and turned heel and ran back to his room, and grabbed his phone to see who was awake, or who he could meet up with this weekend. He was not going to be weird and lonely while Alex got her brains fucked out every day by her perfect boyfriend. His unintentional off-week had him frustrated and it was making him crazy, he knew that. His brain was mixing up frustrations right now and that was bad bad bad. He should have known this would happen, but he had a hard rule about Alex, and that was that he did not let his brain just pull her into filthy fantasies or use her like that. If he needed a release, there were plenty of women to find who were game for that, and Alex was protected because she was special and had a special place in his life. So if his cock wanted to try and fuck with him right now, reaching for that moan in the dark, he’d just have to stuff it somewhere eles and quickly.

Like the fleshlight Alex had bought him as a birthday gag gift years ago that only saw occasional use. Only in an emergency. Because no one was fucking answering his messages tonight, like none of them went out on a Wednesday night ever! 11:30 was not too late for a booty call!

So maybe Hoseok got a moan out of Alex. So what? Good for her. The fleshlight she’d got him might be a poor replacement for a real woman but it got way more than one moan out of him.

Jungkook groaned as his dick slotted neatly into Geneva’s pussy. He could hear her sigh of relief through his own because for a hot second there it had looked like things were not going to be successful. He’d done a decent job masking the betrayal of his dick with enough foreplay to make her cum once already, but his wrist was cramped up and his lips were getting chapped from making out and the whole point of this was supposed to be draining the dam. He never had to make out with a girl for that long these days!

“There, there, that’s good,” he murmured, grasping her hips and rolling her on top of him. Geneva was particularly good on top, her rhythms always worked him good and her thighs lasted just long enough before they’d start trembling. He loved the look of that, trembling thighs. Her tits jiggled as she rocked, keeping his attention from her grinning face or the way her mouth hung open to make these little ‘oh oh oh’ sighs. Good, this was good!

This was not good. Even as he leaned into the feeling of pleasure, he could feel himself sliding out of her, too limp to stay upright. She noticed it pretty quickly too and slid off him and leaned down to spit and suck, but he could feel her frustration in the sharp suck around his head.

“K, baby, all good,” he said, nudging her head away as it started to hurt.

She pulled off with a pop and sighed, “You’re too drunk.”

“Maybe…”

Yeah, that was true. He was too drunk. Whiskey dick and all that. He’d lost track of how many he had at the bar with Nate and Geneva and a few other coworkers. They never went out, but when he’d sent out a text to some of the colleagues he could tolerate saying he’d buy the first round, all seven had shown up.

That had felt good, to look around the table as people upended their shots. He had friends! Friend who weren’t just Taehyung and Jimin in their happy relationships and Namjoon with his fresh new romance already and Alex with her–

She was out with Hoseok again tonight, he was pretty sure. Two nights bookending the one evening he’d gotten with her this week. This would be a trend now. He’d get one evening a week for a while, and then one a month, and then no evenings. At least if it had been a perfect evening, that would have been something! It was so damn close!

Geneva pushed away and went to pee. Jungkook just lay there for a moment, giving his cock one last chance to rally. It did not, no surprise when he couldn’t think of anything sexy at the moment, just his lazy evening with Alex. They’d eaten the last of the brownies she’d made to celebrate his commission win, lamenting how stale they were until it became funny. They’d splurged on a cab ride to the arcade to keep Thursday tradition up and laughed at their own disrupted game performances, the distraction of twinkling lights, the funnier-than-usual antics of their air hockey matches. They’d caught another cab home, arm wrestling, or really just flat out wrestling in the back seat over which snacks they’d DoorDash, another splurge Jungkook was willing to fund with his commission bonus. He’d bought them all anyway, anything Alex had asked for, but she’d gotten kind of annoyed with him when he’d said something about it he couldn’t really remember now. He didn’t remember what it was. But it hadn’t lasted long because Alex had always been infinitely patient with him and then they were wrestling on the couch to figure out what movie to watch and Jungkook did remember that he had thought if I was Alex’s boyfriend I would not want her wrestling like this with me knowing how much I like it. That had made him laugh but the buzz was wearing off enough not to say that to her and instead they’d watched a movie.

But then, when he’d told her to come sleep in his bed if she wanted… she had said no. She didn’t think that was ok to do anymore now that she had a boyfriend.

It was awkward to get rejected by Alex for something he hadn’t thought was anything wrong. And painful. It sucked.

Probably she was right. He could see how she was right. He had just thought the same thing, hadn’t he?

But it also wasn’t right. He was Jungkook. She was Alex. Shouldn’t a boyfriend just have to accept that?

And he’d seen so clearly suddenly the crumbling of everything he had with her as one thing after another was wrong because she had a boyfriend now and someday there would be nothing left, as soon as she and Hobi realized how much it all meant to him.

That’s what he’d been thinking last night. And those same thoughts came to him tonight as the whiskey poured. And now he lay in the bed of the only sexy female coworker he had, and he’d failed to fuck her good, and that was definitely going to be whispered about at work. His reputation, gone. Alex, gone. She’d even admitted Hoseok didn’t like that Jungkook called her ‘baby.’ Like how fucking threatened was this guy?! He got Alex! Wasn’t that enough? Did he have more demands to make? He needed to just take everything away from Jungkook?

He pushed up and grabbed his pants, at which point Geneva returned and asked without any sadness in her voice, “Oh are you going?”

“Yeah sorry I don’t want to be here anymore,” he answered, then, “Shit. I mean… uh… sorry I got too drunk, maybe another time…”

“It’s ok, you were good with your hand tonight so that’s… something…”

He had a hard time concentrating on her face right now. Everything was kind of blurry and tilting. He stumbled out of her apartment before realizing he still needed to call a cab to take him home because he’d left his car at the bar. Maybe Alex could take him to get it tomorrow. If she was still allowed to now that she’d been dating a guy for three months or four months or whatever it was.

Actually Jungkook knew exactly how long it had been and he hated that his brain remembered things like that but couldn’t remember why he’d unlocked his phone. To get a cab. Right. But he got distracted by Instagram and looked at that and started walking. No posts from Alex about whatever she and Hoseok had done tonight which meant it either wasn’t special or wasn’t the kind of thing you should post on social media about.

He stumbled upon a little park down the road from Geneva’s apartment and even though it was late and he might get mugged, he just walked. It’d suck for the person who tried to mug him anyway; he felt outside of his own body, invincible, he’d love the excuse to beat the shit out of something or someone! And then he’d go home and sulk about it and Alex would freak the fuck out and coddle him and he’d have to pretend to hate it, all of her attention focused on him, the way she’d push his hair back and talk to him like he was a baby because she thought he thought that was funny, and he did think it was funny! Wait, when had he stopped thinking it was a funny joke? The way her tits would dangle in his face and she’d probably press her knee into his spleen as she’d try to adjust the pillows around him. Because in this scenario he was like a Union soldier in the civil war or something apparently. Just as quickly his brain decided they were in an anime instead and her nursing outfit was not leaving much to the–

What was with him lately? Jungkook was glad he was too drunk to feel things right now or he’d be really freaked out by his own inability to get her out of his head lately. He’d had to tuck all of his thoughts about her relationship and his jokes and snide comments and whatever away, because by now he’d had multiple friends tell him he was seeming possessive of her. He wasn’t! He understood she could go meet Prince Charming! He wasn’t surprised Hoseok was falling head over heels in love with Alex! He wasn’t even that surprised Alex was falling in love with Hoseok too because to make it all even more disgusting, Hoseok seemed like a genuinely good guy! And here was Jungkook walking out on a girl he worked with and would have to see again because he couldn’t even keep his dick hard. He was losing, and losing his best friend, and he just didn’t like to lose, and extra didn’t want to lose his best friend.

He pulled his phone out and called her, knowing she wouldn’t answer. He was going to leave her a drunk rambling text message because she’d think it was funny. Maybe tomorrow when she woke up in the arms of Hoseok Jung and decided to finally check her phone to see if her best friend had suffered any debilitating embarrassment or emergencies.

Instead she answered on the second ring, her voice as clear and solid as Jungkook didn’t feel right now, “Koo? Why are you calling me, what’s wrong?”

“I can just call you.”

“Uh….”

“I’m just walking. You know?”

“No, I don’t know,” she said. He adored the suspicion in her voice. “Why are you calling me? Is something wrong? Oh!” She gasped, interrupting as he started to answer. “Is this one of those situations where you need me to make an emergency so you can leave?”

“I already left.”

“Oh.”

“I’m just walking. I’m in a park…”

“Are you ok? Are you high?”

“No. Wait but yes. Uh, ok yes, high no? But drunk yes. Hey Alex can I have a ride or are you fucking?”

“What?”

“Yeah?”

“Jungkook,” she sighed, but in an amused way, like she thought he was funny. “Yeah, I’ll come get you, where are you? Send me your location.”

“Ok. Thanks ba— baloo? Baby beluga.”

“Shut up, I’ll be there in like ten minutes. Don’t get mugged.”

Trying not to call her baby made him want to do it more. Unironically calling her baby. Calling her baby not just because she was the size of one but also because she acted like one– no but also because it made her mad sometimes, if she was trying to do something and frustrated and he called her baby, or because she laughed when he tried to use fuckboy lines on her, which never worked anyway. Worked in the sense of getting her to fuck him. Not that he was trying to get her to fuck him. Alex wasn’t the kind of girl he could just fuck and forget about and she wasn’t the kind of girl who found someone like him actually charming and that was fine, he wasn’t trying to fuck her, he had blocked that whole possibility from his brain years ago.

Look, once upon a time, Jungkook had been a teenage boy, with a teenage girl best friend who was the coolest, funniest person he’d ever met. They liked all the same things. He felt understood by her. She’d had a lot to say at the time about how much she hated her flat hair or her brown eyes or her weight or her big boobs or whatever but Jungkook was just a simple teenage boy who thought she was cute and funny and special. And also obviously big tits were a positive thing. And there had been a moment in time when he’d thought about how he probably should just date and marry Alex because she seemed like the perfect girl to him –they’d made a joke about it actually and then their moms took it way too seriously.

Because there was a really important thing missing in that Alex wasn’t interested in dating him. At first he’d thought maybe Alex just didn’t want to date anyone, but she’d dated a few guys, she’d had a few crushes, she’d even had sex with Yoongi. That all seemed to prove it wasn’t dating, it was him, especially now that she was with Hoseok and fucking all the time and not asexual like he’d convinced himself. He knew she could be shy about guys but she wasn’t shy with him so that wasn’t some secret issue. She loved him, he felt loved by her, in the the most platonic friend way possible. That was precious to him. He knew, even as a teenager, that it was not worth risking that for a what if with an obvious result.

Anyway, being desired was important to him! He needed that! No matter how much he wanted to protect his life with Alex, he knew it could never be complete, not because of sex but becaues of desire. Shallow desire meets deep desire. That was what the goal was for those long term relationships, right? He got all the shallow desire he needed from the women he hooked up with, but it never had that deeper level, and that’s why he was called a fuckboy. Meanwhile Namjoon and his ex married young and in love and stopped having sex long before they gave up on the relationship, maybe that was the opposite.

He and Alex had the deeper desire in spades, he thought, but he could count on his fingers the number of times she’d ever said something sincerely nice about his appearance. She usually made it sound like she couldn’t really understand why other women thought he was hot and ok, maybe it hurt his feelings sometimes but he was shielded by having realized that as a teenager and he was fine with it. Alex was his best friend and honestly that was even rarer and more precious to him than any girlfriend.

He kept thinking the word precious. He thought it was a funny word to use but his brain seemed to be hiccuping with it now, so that when Alex ran up to him, he slung his arm around her shoulder and announced,

“My precious is here!”

“Is that a Gollum reference? You fucking nerd.”

“Don’t go into the park alone, it’s dark,” he said, grinning down at her. “Damn you’re short.”

“Hey! You’re just weird and tall.”

“I wish I was tall,” he sighed. “Maybe in my next life.”

“Nah you’ll probably be shorter because of all your bad deeds.”

“I do the deed good. You don’t know.”

“Is that what you were doing tonight?” she prodded. “Good deeds? Bad deeds?”

“I failed the deed,” he sighed. Then, “You don’t need to know.”

“Yeah I don’t need to know, “ she laughed.

“Did you do the deed? Wait no don’t tell me, I don’t need to know.”

“Yeah, you don’t need to know,” she parroted again. “But what are you so drunk for?”

“Did you leave your boyfriend when I called?”

“Nah. Well, yeah, but I was already heading home anyway, I’ve got an early shift tomorrow.”

“Oh.”

She turned him around, clearly guiding him back to her car, but she held his wrist so his arm stayed around her.

“Were you just out partying? What happened?” Suddenly her voice got very serious as she asked, “Are you… ok? Did something happen?”

“Are you asking if someone took advantage of me?”

“Yeah. Don’t laugh! That can happen to guys too! And I will kill, I’m low to the ground, they’ll never see it coming in their high heels–”

“I like short girls too,” he argued.

“Then it’ll be hand to hand combat, we’ll grapple to the death– ok don’t look so happy about it, we won’t be in jell-o.”

“At least in mud?”

“You don’t want to see that.”

“You don’t know what I want to see.”

“You’ve got a big mouth, Koo. You have kept nothing secret,” she laughed. “Come on, over there–”

“Can we just sit for a little bit?”

“Where, there aren’t any benches and it’s the middle of the night. Technically the park isn’t even open–”

“Remember that time we got kicked out of the park in high school–”

“You don’t have to clarify high school,” she pointed out. “It’s only happened once!”

“I think someone in one of the houses must have called the cops because they saw our flashlights.” They reached her car and she went to unlock the door but Jungkook just sat on the hood and leaned back. It was not comfortable, and the hood was still warm from the engine, but he flopped out and after a moment she came and scrambled up beside him.

“If your ass dents my hood…”

“You’ll never know with all the other dents.”

“Those aren’t my fault! Most of those are those stupid golf balls from Taehyung–”

But Jungkook was back on the park they’d been kicked out of and recalled, “The cops totally thought we were trying to find a place for like a group orgy or something but we were just… just chasing Pokemon…”

“I can’t believe they looked at us and thought we were lying about Pokemon. I wonder if when the game really took off they thought back and were like oh, those kids were telling the truth…”

“But I’ve always thought the funniest part was that they saw the four of us nerdy, awkward teens and were like ‘these kids are definitely going to fuck in a field,’’ Jungkook said. “God my acne was so bad.”

“I know, it was cute,” Alex giggled.

“Shut up, I didn’t want to be cute, I wanted to be hot!”

“Well plenty of girls think you’re hot now!”

“But not you.”

“Who cares what I think?” she demanded. “You said my opinions of who’s hot stopped counting when I liked Daniel Radcliffe.”

“Yeah, what’s wrong with you?”

“What can I say, I love a tragic face scar…”

“I have a tragic face scar,” he pointed out, rolling so she could see it, as if she had never noticed it before.

“The only thing tragic about it was your hand-eye coordination. I know that was from a Hotwheel car to the face.”

“No. It was from a knife fight–”

“You have the eyes of a baby doe, literally no one will believe that.”

“Isn’t a doe already a baby?”

“You’re the expert! I don’t know!”

“You’re like a fluffy little bird I think,” he mused, curled up on his side now. “Always stealing my food and cheeping too early in the morning.”

“Yeah, I’ll accept that. Mess with me and I’ll peck your eyes out–”

“No no, low on the food chain.”

“Hey!”

He laughed. Her outrage was always so funny.

“Hey, you’re really important to me.” He heard the words after he’d said them, but his mouth was already adding, “I don’t know if I ever told you that.”

She just froze and for a moment he feared he had said something way worse.

“Oh god, you’re really trashed, huh? We’re to the philosophical part of your drunk stage…”

“I mean it.”

“Ok ok. Thanks. You’re really important to me too.” She said it so easily though that he worried it wasn’t true. She was just saying that to placate him. Every day he got less important to her and she grew closer with her new perfect boyfriend. Soon all the things she put up with him –the stolen food, the unwashed dishes, the hair in the shower– would be too much. She’d be done living with him in the apartment she didn’t think was nice enough. He knew she deserved better and she was realizing it too.

“Is Hoseok’s apartment really nice?”

“Yeah, I’ve told you it is!”

“Tell me about it.”

“No,” she scoffed. “Let’s go home, you need to sleep it off.”

“Not yet. Let’s just sit here for a few minutes. Please?” He rolled onto his back and looked up, as though to prove he wasn’t going to budge yet.

“It’s late and I’m tired. I have to be up for work at five!”

“Just five minutes,” he begged and took her hand. His stomach dropped as he got this sudden feeling that this was the last moment they’d ever have like this. As if tomorrow she was going to announce her engagement. Maybe she would. Everything was going well. He didn’t know how quickly Alex would move in a relationship but she wasn’t a fuckboy like him so maybe she’d commit quickly. Maybe she was one of those falling fast and hard people. He thought that could be true about her, since he knew she was so soft and gooey on the inside of that punchy, spiky exterior.

“Fine, five minutes,” she mumbled. “The stars look nice tonight.”

They lay there in silence. The silence was a part of them that the others didn’t seem to recognize. They liked to joke that Alex and Jungkook were always teasing, always talking, two noisy old hens together, but the silence was nice too. Jungkook felt his body melt into non-existence, lying on the warm hood of the engine, looking at the stars, Alex’s little clammy hand wrapped up in his. He must have dozed off but he wasn’t aware of it, alcohol tugging his mind here and there like a balloon on a string. He was one content cat for the time being; it was no surprise he dozed off.

Alex woke him, nudging his arm, “All right, Koo, time to go home. I’m going to get in so much trouble if you fall asleep here and I have to drive home without letting you roll off the hood.” She jostled his hand in hers to rouse him.

He rolled onto his elbow, and leaned over, and kissed her.

It just happened.

It just felt like what he needed to do in the moment and his mind on the balloon string felt a tug but not quick enough to redirect.

He kissed Alex, the first kiss they’d ever shared. His sloppy, lazy lips pressed against hers, his free hand bracing himself on the car hood so he wouldn’t crush her. He’d gone in without a breath, without a thought, still half-asleep but with a mission, and had to surface for air shortly.

She hadn’t moved, hadn’t responded in any way, and when he pulled away to see her face, her shock was what made him realize what he’d just done. Her hand pressed against his chest, gently at first, and then more firmly.

“What are you doing?” she asked in the quietest voice. Then, louder, sitting up, shouldering him away from her, “How fucking drunk are you? What– why did you–”

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck, half his brain panicked. The other half suggested you’re halfway in, you gotta commit now. He leaned to try and kiss her again so she’d understand. He landed his mouth on hers again, somehow, and he wanted to believe it was because she let him, but just as quickly she firmly pushed against his chest.

“Stop! I’m not one of your fuck girls– Are you really so drunk you just confused me with–”

“No, Alex, I–”

“We have to go,” she said, scrambling off the hood much more quickly than she’d crawled on. “It’s time to go home. Get in the car, Jungkook.”

“Wait, Alex–”

“Just get in the car,” she said. He slid off the hood and stumbled after her as she fled to the driver’s seat. He didn’t want to scare her but he could tell she was panicking and upset and he hadn’t meant to upset her. He reached for her hand again but dropped it instantly when she shook him off like a fly.

“Wait, Alex, I–”

“Let’s just go home and forget–”

“I think I’m in love with you,” he tried to explain, the words once again leaping past his brain and just launching themselves out there in an attempt to calm her down. Wait. Did he? He didn’t. Well obviously he loved her, but not like that… but did he?!

She froze. He would never be able to say how long they were frozen there like that. Too much alcohol and the surprise of what he’d just doen rendered time eternal. He thought it might have been five minutes but probably it was not.

Finally Alex was re-animated. And she was suddenly madder than he would have expected.

“You think? You suddenly think you’re in love with me? You’ve known me for like twelve years and suddenly you– No. Bullshit! Why the fuck would you say something like that all of a sudden?”

“I…” He couldn’t keep up with what she was saying. She was yelling and his circuit board was shooting off fireworks in its sudden confusion.

“No, you’re not in love with me,” she snapped. “You’re possessive and clingy now because for the first time I have someone else in my life.”

“No, that’s not–”

“You’re just pissy that I’m not sitting around for you to find time to spend with me in between all the girls you fuck, at your beck and call whenever you need a ride or someone to feed you or someone to–”

“That’s not true!”

“Do you think I’m going to fuck you now? Or dump my boyfriend because you kissed me?”

“No. No, I…” He didn’t know what to say. He’d just done it and his brain was all wobbly and dizzy and she was mad at him and he had the sinking realization that he had just fucked up in a way he couldn’t fully comprehend yet because he was definitely very drunk. Damn, he wished he had just blacked out already.

“You don’t have feelings for me, you’re just drunk and horny, but it’s bullshit for you to do… that,” she said, spitting the word out. “That’s not fair. I thought you respected me more than that.”

“I…I do respect– Alex–”

She took a deep breath, like when she was really mad and didn’t want to eviscerate the person in front of her but only because she knew she was too cute for prison.

“Get in the car. It’s time to go home. Keep your mouth shut and to yourself.”

He just stared at her, but she threw her door open and pulled it shut behind her and started the car.

He’d kissed Alex.

But now she was pissed.

And he shouldn’t have done that.

But he wanted to kiss her again.

But with her responding this time. He felt the need for her to kiss him back so badly that it kept him rooted to the spot, the need for it made his stomach hurt.

But she didn’t want to kiss him or be kissed by him.

And he had told her he loved her in a way that felt different than any of the times they had jokingly, casually, friendly said it before, but she didn’t want to hear that either and he wasn’t even sure if it was true. He hadn’t thought that before. Where had that come from?! Sober words made drunk thoughts or– no it was the other way round…

What if she was right that it was only because he was jealous of her having someone, and pulling away, and leaving him, and willing to say and do anything to keep her from going?

And what if that was exactly what was going to happen now anyway?

But what if he really did love her and just had never realized it before because… because why? Why wouldn’t he have noticed it before? That was something you knew. What if he really was just drunk and a selfish, spoiled brat, and he had just kissed his best friend because he couldn’t stand that he wasn’t number one in her life anymore?

That sounded like him. That sounded way more like him. Alex was probably right. She knew him better than anyone in the world. If she said he only kissed her because he was drunk and being a jealous brat about her having a new perfect boyfriend, that was probably true.

She honked the horn and shouted, “Let’s go!”

He hurried around to his side of the car and tumbled into his seat.

t was a quiet ride home. He wished he could doze off again but he was awake for every excruciating minute of silence as he sobered up and regretted everything. Regretted calling her. Regretted kissing her. Regretted that stupid thing he’d said about being in love with her.

Regretted that the longer he lay awake thinking about it that night, knowing she was fuming in her own bed and would definitely never be in his again, the more he thought it might actually be true.

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