#those who ship it can stay just know my blog ain’t the place for it

[cherrypieships]

the amusement park: chapter one

A/N: Hi all! This is my first fic posted here on my self ship blog! I’m really proud of this story, it’s gonna be a two-parter.

Ship: davey jacobs x pepper simmons (s/i), featuring my best friend V and my gf Khourey and their respective f/os, race higgins and jack kelly!

Summary: Some of the newsies head to Canobie lake's haunted house/amusement park. Pepper and Davey are the only non-couple.

The backseat of Race’s mom’s minivan was one of the last places Pepper wanted to be at 7 o’clock on a Friday morning. Yet here she was, awaiting their arrival to Canobie Lake Park’s annual Screemfest as she got crammed in next to Davey Jacobs.

Not that she disliked Davey. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Pepper liked Davey a whole lot. And that was exactly the problem. Here she was, in such close proximity to him that their knees knocked together every time Violet hit a pothole, harbouring a gigantic crush on her best friend. And everyone in the car knew beside him. And they were totally fifth- and sixth-wheeling on this trip.

It was fine.

Besides, Pepper was willing to endure a few hours pining quietly if it meant she could go on some sick roller coasters. So she sucked it up and tucked quietly into her seat.

Mickey turned around from the middle row and handed Pepper a piece of her chocolate croissant. “You cold back there?” She asked, wild red curls framing her face as she spoke.

After popping the pastry into her mouth, Pepper shrugged. “I’m fucking always cold.”

Jack tugged his hat up from where it rested over his eyes. “That is a fair point, she is always cold.” He said pointedly, and yelped when Pepper flicked the back of his head.

“I have poor circulation, dickhead.” She whined.

Race snickered from the passenger seat. “Good thing my dickhead doesn’t have poor circulation.” He quipped.

Though Pepper couldn’t see it, she could feel Violet rolling their eyes at their boyfriend. “I’m gonna file for divorce, Race.” They picked up their coffee and took a brief sip. “And I’m taking the kids.”

Beside her, Davey was digging around in the duffel bag he’d brought for the ride. He’d described it to Pepper as a ‘Minor Catastrophe Bag’, with a tiny first aid kit, nail clippers, some snacks, ibuprofen, pads, and a pair of tweezers. As much as she would have loved to gently bully him for being such a mother hen, she knew she’d be thanking him later through an inevitable headache. He straightened, finally, and emerged with a sweater. “Um, if you’re really cold,” He held it out to her. “You can wear this. It’s my backup but I’m pretty warm.” He said.

Pepper took the sweater in both hands with a gentle smile, trying to ignore the soft brush of his fingertips against hers. “You sure?” As much as she would love to immediately engulf herself in his clothes, it was Mid-October and she didn’t want to steal Davey’s source of warmth from him.

Like usual, he waved off her gentle concern. “I have my jacket and I’m wearing layers.” He explained, pushing the sweater towards her.

She took it in her hands, hoping and praying that the heat in her face wasn’t visible. “If you insist.” The teasing was playful, as it always had been. Their friendship had existed for years, the product of a few friend groups merging and discovering that they fit like puzzle pieces. Davey always gave up his cherry Starbursts to Pepper because they were her favorite. Pepper let Davey borrow her favorite poetry books. They spent summers at the pool together. Had napped, cried, laughed, celebrated together for what seemed like forever.

So why did wearing his clothes make her so much more flustered than anything before?

She slid the sweater on, enveloping herself in his scent- oh Christ she was dying- and did actually feel much better. Even though the dark blue didn’t exactly match her outfit.

Davey smiled at her. “When will you learn to dress for the weather?” He admonished gently.

“That’s why I keep you around.” Pepper said, rather than admitting that she was just forgetful and liked her outfit too much.

“Davey’s new occupation: Pepper’s coat rack.” Violet chimed in, handing their phone to Race to switch the song that was playing.

Davey sighed. “I’m really putting that college education to good use.”

The rest of the car ride went by relatively quickly, much to Pepper’s delight. They hopped out into the cool autumn air, cracked their cramped joints, and headed into the park. Davey thankfully left most of his supplies in the trunk of the minivan (save for the ibuprofen he’d managed to sneak into Pepper’s purse just in case), so they’d made it through security and into the place without much fuss as well.

Jack, ever the natural born leader of the bunch, snagged a map and immediately started planning their route for the day. He unfurled it in front of the group and, as Mickey curled into his side, eyed the pathways and rollercoasters thoughtfully. “So do you guys wanna start at the front and work our way back? Or the other way around?”

There was a beat of silence as everyone worked the thought over. “We should just head towards the back, I think everyone’s gotta start testing the rides first anyway.” Mickey piped up first.

Davey nodded. “Gives us more time.” He added.

They made the trek towards the back of the park, Mickey and Jack leading with the map.

Race sidled up beside Pepper and hip-checked her. “You been to these haunted houses before?” He asked, making reference to the night-time festivities. Once the sun set, the park released creepily-costumed actors to scare those who stayed, and previously blocked-off areas were transformed into small haunted houses. Truthfully, Pepper had never been to any haunted house, let alone ones set up at an amusement park.

So, she shook her head. “It’s my first haunted house, actually.” Something she’d confided in Mickey and Vi about.

Race feigned a gasp. “Well ain’t this a hell of a place to start!” He elbowed her, and she returned the gesture, their own weird little handshake.

“Are you serious?” Davey asked, his own elbow catching her shoulder, fucking ow, he’s bony.

Pepper nodded. “I was too scared when I was a kid, and then when I stopped being a baby, all that stuff with my mom happened, so I just never went.”

Davey hummed in acknowledgement, evidently eager to skip past the whole ‘my-mom-is-ill’ conversation. “Ah, well. If you need a buddy, I’m sure we’ll be left alone. Together.” He said, his head tilting to their friends, who had once again broken off into couples, leaving them to their own devices.

Shoving the impending smile down, she nodded. “I’m sure we will.”

“Well, we have a good, um,” He checked the watch on his wrist (the one with the brown leather strap that he wore with every outfit, even if Pepper told him it didn’t match, or that it was too clunky.) “Like, ten hours before we need to even think about that.”

She crumpled into a fit of giggles. “Perfect. I’m sure we’ll spend that time wisely.” She swatted his arm as he shoved his watch in front of her face.

---

They did not.

Six and a half hours later, the group stood in line at one of the concession stands, staring at the menu and nodding to the song playing in the background; some mid-2010s Kesha track that was making Vi go absolutely crazy.

Jack squinted at the chalkboard. “They don’t even have chicken tenders here?” He nudged Race. “They don’t even have chicken tenders here.”

Race nodded slowly, also squinting. Pepper wondered, briefly, if the pair needed glasses or if they were just trying to look contemplative. “Mickey’s gonna call it homophobic, you know.” He said.

“It is!” Mickey called dutifully from the table they had snagged for the gang to inevitably sit at. “I’ll take some cheese fries though!” To which Jack nodded and stepped up to the worker behind the plexiglass, beginning to list off the group’s orders.

Vi’s voice floated through Pepper’s ears. “Oh what a shame that you came here with someone,” they approached her, eyes closed and hands up by their shoulders as they got all the way into their performance. “My god, if they have candy apples at a stall somewhere, I’m gonna go buckwild.” They said suddenly, snapping out of their trance to stare at Pepper expectantly.

Before she could say anything, though, Davey stole the words from her mouth. “You are allergic to apples, V.” He chided, maybe more kindly than Pepper would have put it, but she was willing to overlook it for the sake of the way a small smile pulled at his mouth.

Violet dropped their hands. “Only a little bit.” They argued.

“A little bit allergic.” Davey repeated, and Pepper pressed her lips together firmly to fight off the grin at the exasperation in his voice.

“To apples, yes.” They nodded, and, evidently done with arguing, turned to keep Mickey company at the table.

Davey turned to Pepper, disbelief crossing his features. “Can you believe-”

“Yes.” She cut him off. “Yes I absolutely can believe it.” Pepper said, digging through her memory of the times V had pulled some similar shit; eating eleven mozzarella sticks despite their lactose intolerance, buying a Panic! At The Disco vinyl despite wanting Brendon Urie dead, and spending $40 on a Funko Pop figure of Spiderman Noir for no real reason other than some guy at a convention told them to.

Jack turned to his friends. “Okay I did the ordering, someone else has to do the collecting.” He announced, shoving the receipt with the order number on it towards Davey, who had inadvertently become Second In Command. Then, with a signature Jack Kelly Smug Smile, he stalked off to where V and Mickey were seated, Race following behind.

Great, Pepper thought, another conveniently timed moment alone with Davey. Briefly, she wondered if her friends had planned this ahead of time, and then she came to her senses and realized that yes, of course they had. Those conniving little weasels had been conspiring to get Davey to like her since senior prom.

She still remembered the way Mickey had shoved Davey at her when a slow song came on that night. Work Song by Hozier had drifted over the speakers, and V’s elbow caught her in the ribs as they growled a furious “Dance with him or I’ll fucking kill you.” and skipped off to sway with Racer. Pepper had stood on the dance floor, gaping as she watched Jack wink at Vi. Those two never got along about anything.

Davey’s hand had entered her field of vision, skin almost glowing under the light of the mirrorball. He’d smiled sheepishly, admitted that this was one of his favorite songs, and asked if she’d like to share a dance.

The strange thing was, she didn’t actually like Davey before that. At least she thought she didn’t. It wasn’t until she was cradled close to his chest, breathing in the smell of his soap and some soft, powdery cologne he frequented, that she found her heart pounding and her palms going clammy. And when he’d started humming against her hair, one hand in hers and the other around her waist, she knew she was absolutely fucked.

She’d started thinking about it and, yeah, it made sense to want to be with Davey. Handsome Davey, who sometimes made her laugh until soda came out her nose, and whose affinity for children’s cartoons made him the ideal conversation partner. Three years later, she was still in love with him.

And it was all her stupid, evil friends’ faults.

Back in the present, Davey tucked his hands in his pockets, his lips twisting as he lost himself in thought. “We’re gonna have so much shit to carry.” He murmured, exasperated at being the ones left behind.

“We sure are. At least you and Jack ordered drinks, so that’s more stuff to spill.” She twisted a long strand of hair around her finger.

Davey scoffed good-naturedly. “Yeah well you made me leave my water bottle in the car so I needed to be hydrated somehow.”

Pepper kicked at his shin with the toe of her sneaker. “And a caramel hot chocolate is the best way to stay hydrated?” She grinned up at him, watching him tuck the receipt into his back pocket and start moving for the pick-up window as the drink in question was called out.

He hummed in assent. “You bet it is.” He picked up the paper cup, taking a short sip and licking at his bottom lip. Pepper ignored the urge to run her thumb across it.

She must have been staring, because after a second, Davey held the cup out towards her. He didn’t say anything, didn’t need to. She loved chocolate and caramel, and always ran cold. He knew there was no way she’d have turned down a sip if he’d offered, so he must have decided to save his breath. She took the cup in her hands, the warmth emanating from it seeping pleasingly into her palms, and took a sip as well, subconsciously hoping to taste more than the drink. She licked her lips.

Davey watched her intently. He opened his mouth, ready to say something to her, when the order bell rang out. “Order sixty-nine!” The college girl behind the counter announced.

“Oh, fuck yes.” Race cackled from the table. V leaned into him, trying to hide their own laughter as Mickey gave him a high-five.

Pepper sighed, she should’ve known that would be their luck. The pair of them moved forward, Davey pushing in front of her to grab the tray before she could even reach for it. “I got it.” He mumbled, holding onto the plastic tray like a nervous Disney-Channel-Original-Movie teenager. “Grab the drinks, don’t worry about it.” And then he smiled up at her, a closed-lipped little smile that made her heart race as she picked up Jack’s orange soda.

Behind her, someone clicked their tongue. Pepper turned, making immediate eye contact with an older lady with greying black hair and soft folds in her skin, who gave her a knowing smile. “And they say chivalry is dead. You got yourself a sweet one, honey.” She said, then winked.

Pepper’s jaw went slack trying to think of a response. She turned back to Davey, whose eyebrows were so far up his face that they were basically in his hairline. “Oh God,” he said simply, “Um, thank you, ma’am.”

The woman laughed softly, leaned over and patted Pepper’s shoulder as if she knew something Pepper didn’t, and then disappeared into the line to order food.

There was a long, silent moment, where Pepper was racking her brain, searching every corner for something to say that would shift the air, move the mood from awkward to playful with a joke of some sort. She looked at him again, and he was staring at her, unblinking. There was a funny look on his face- regret maybe- his eyebrows low and his eyes a little soft. She wondered, distantly, if he was realizing that she was in love with him; if it was a look of pity-

“Hurry up with my goddamn cheese fries!” Mickey yelled, their hunger obviously taking control over their inhibition.

Without a second thought, Pepper turned on her heel and walked to where their friends were, leaving Davey and the unnerving encounter behind.

#pls drop a like/rb if you read! i'm really proud of this one! #davey #olive talks #my fic #the amusement park

[tundrainafrica]

I just find it so unfortunate that some aggressive shippers ruin a ship and a character for so many people. A popular Erwin x Levi artist got hate comments by some Levihan shippers and so many people are bashing it now on twitter because of that. Its just so sad considering LH was one of the most beautiful and fun dynamics in such a depressing story. Even Hange is getting hated because LH is pretty much the default ship involving them and it just breaks my heart :(

Twitter has some great content and I actually hang around AOT twt for some quick content. It’s like every time I’m feeling fast food I just hang there, like a few tweets, read a few soc med AUs etc etc. 

But god. It’s a mess man. Last year I was constantly on twitter to be honest and it left me in a bad mood everyday because people are just being assholes for little to no reason really but just to put themselves in what they believe is a morally higher ground from their peers. And people just like fighting and the funny part is no opinions are actually heard, no views are actually exchanged. It’s just “you dont agree with me so you’re a bad person.” 

Ad hominem attacks are just everywhere.

So I like staying in my small little hole and just talking to myself there and just liking the content of the Levihan people I actually follow. I see stuff I don’t agree with but I’ve kinda accepted that a lot of people there are just there to push an agenda because really if people were that open minded, I don’t think lynching and call out culture would have gotten this far.  

I’ve used this same analogy so many times but I feel like in Twitter, people are just scrambling for some sort of moral high ground. Because of that, it is completely useless to engage in discourse there because one thing I noticed is most people who are vocal there already have a set stance on something and the fact that they’re ready to just bully anyone who stands in the way of their agenda, just makes convincing them out of the agenda impossible and a complete waste of time. And there are two issues in particular among the LH community which are really unsettling for me: the ship wars and within the LH community, the gender war. 

Ship wars

I find the ship wars unnecessary because really what makes a superior ship? 

Probability of being canon? How much fuel they were given in canon? Healthiness of the relationship?

The truth is people ship for many reasons. But really, who are we to judge how a person goes about the way they decide to participate in the fandom and ship? As long as it is something they keep within personal spaces and do it responsibly, I don’t think it’s our business to judge someone or lynch them. The important thing is people are able to not be an asshole about it. People can ship the most questionable shit, create the most dubious content, as long as that person is respecting boundaries and putting the right tags and trigger warnings, who are we to call them out right?

Of course I prefer LH over other Levi ships personally but is there really a need to attack other people’s ships about it? I probably do poke fun at Ereri because until now I still do not get why people enjoy Ereri in the first place but why destroy the fandom experience for people just because we don’t agree with them.

My general intention behind shipping Levihan is because above anything I value the healthiness in the relationship and the things people can learn about love and relationships by analyzing Levihan’s dynamics and headcanoning them. I love Levi and Hange’s dynamics to death and I like digging deeper into them and pulling out lessons from it about love, life and relationships and just sharing them with people which is my whole point for participating in this fandom in the first place. 

But in the end, ships are just preferences. Some people like getting a kick out of dubious pairings and toxic relationships. As long as they consume these responsibly and don’t emulate them in real life, I see no problem in it. 

The toxic ones are the ones who actively crucify people for preferences. 

The Gender War

One really disturbing thing I found about twitter is that deciding to use ‘she’ to refer to Hange can get you lynched. I found a few accounts that would reblog tweets where someone says something like “Yes, Hange, Queen” which gets retweeted by some NB Hange folk who say stuff like “Unfollow this transphobe now.” 

Because apparently deciding to headcanon Hange as a woman or just preferring to use ‘she’ makes people a transphobe. Which is personally just... really disturbing. I don’t believe words like homophobic, transphobic, racist should be so easily thrown around unless there is hard evidence to believe that someone is really one of the epithets above like for example: 

There are things I find completely assholish like of course, refusing to use someone’s preferred pronouns if they ask you. 

But Hange is fictional and Hange is a gift to the fandom.And I don’t even think the issue about Hange’s gender should have ever reached this far. The only thing Yams ever said was that Hange is just not the type to be tied down to a single gender. 

And policing Hange’s gender and saying NOPE SHE’S NON BINARY USE THEY Is just counterintuitive to the whole idea that she’s a free spirit. In the end, Hange as a character wouldn’t have given a fuck whether people called her a they, she or even a he. 

And yeah, it’s frustrating really that these two issues I just discussed above are ruining Hange as a character for a lot of people and consequently, ruining Levi x Hange as a ship. 

Apparently, a lot of people are closet LxH shippers or closet Hange stans because the moment they tweet something about Hange, there are people who will attack them. If people refer to Hange as they, they get attacked. If people refer to Hange as she, they get attacked. There are so many antis apparently to the LxH ship, some apparently are jealous because ‘it’s the closest to canon’ while others just apparently deem it a toxic ship because of our own internal gender war.  

There’s no winning really. And to be honest, there’s nothing I can do either and I don’t want to engage in any arguments in twitter if at the end of it, I’m just gonna end up wasting my time listening to ad hominem attacks directed at me just for not agreeing with someone in a fandom related matter. . 

I’ve said my piece about the Hange gender issue so many times. There are NBs who use she. There are those who use they. Being female and being NB aren’t mutually exclusive. You can be both at the same time.

But yeah, we still have people being assholes about this and pushing factually wrong agendas. I love research and I have been writing research papers and metas for a lot of things even before I started this blog in the first place. And I eventually learned that the world is so complex that no opinion is completely and absolutely correct. 

And ideally, opinions shouldn’t be made so easily. 

Don’t get me wrong. I believe everyone is entitled to a preference and when I say preference I mean the type of food they like, the type of wallpaper they like. 

But no one is entitled to a moral judgement or opinion just for existing and when I say opinion I mean questions on morals, on what’s right or what isn’t, what is or what should be. Every single person has the responsibility to research, hear both sides of a discourse and understanding them before deciding for themselves what’s right. And this is why hearing accusations that someone is ‘transphobic,’ ‘homophobic’ blah blah over how we hc a character just really does not sit well with me. 

Passing moral judgement on someone requires discernment, deep thought and lots and lots of evidence. But yeah this is a philosophical question and a political question so I ain’t going to delve into it here.

Because, in the end, fandoms are preferences. The way we choose to participate in a fandom and create content are preferences more than anything.

So what? (Btw, if you reached all the way here, thank you for listening to me ramble lol and sorry if you weren’t expecting this type of ramble)

I know I’ve just been rambling a lot up there for a lot of reasons but really what message do I wanna give? 

Fandoms are preferences more than anything so I don’t even believe that there should be a discussion on moral judgement here. People can have the weirdest kinks, the most questionable preferences but as long as they aren’t going around romanticizing abuse, beating up people in real life, killing them and lying in real life, who are we to judge?

Even if someone says they have a rape kink and abuse kink when it comes to fics, as long as they acknowledge it’s something they shouldn’t emulate in real life, as long as they can keep an adult conversation about it, I think these people are generally kinder and more pleasant overall than people who force their healthy canon ship and lynch everyone for having more questionable preferences. 

Ship and let ship. Live and let live. Headcanon and let headcanon. If a person has a differing opinion, listen. (Or really, if you just don’t want to deal with listening to differing opinions coz you’re just gonna get stressed, don’t lynch? Don’t send hate? And just ignore it?)

Ask yourself. Does the person acknowledge that it isn’t right in real life? Do they acknowledge if they emulate it in real life it has the potential to be harmful?

Honestly, all I wanna do is just let people stan Levi and Hange however they want to. There are obviously hcs I dont agree with. But in the LH community we just all love Levihan, let’s not ruin the fandom experience for anyone. In the AOT community, we all just love AOT, let’s not ruin it for anyone. Let’s not hurt anyone, attack them etc. 

If someone doesn’t agree and they can hold an adult conversation about it and they don’t emulate these toxic opinions in real life and they recognize that there is the option to just agree to disagree, why don’t we just listen and engage in this discourse to learn more about other people and to build more perspectives?

Because really it isn’t the questionable hcs or the multiple genders which leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. It’s the people who just go straight to attacking instead of actually considering that there’s potential for discourse and there’s potential to ‘agree to disagree’ because in the end, fandom discourse is a question of preference more than moral judgement. 

It’s easier said than done really. But personally for me, I just try to keep my fandom experience as non toxic as possible while at the same time as mentally fulfilling as possible. I enjoy discourse, I like hearing differing opinions and I really believe with something as light and as inconsequential as fandoms as our common ground, we can learn to peacefully co-exist despite differing opinions on what the best ship is or what Hange’s gender is. 

Note: I won’t delve too much on the Hange gender issue here because I have pending asks about those which I’ll answer in one go, but I really believe that both they and she are valid pronouns for Hange. 

I have a general preference for ‘she’ because it’s just easier to read. But personally I don’t think too much about the gender identity issue because it’s really just too complex for me and i like spending my time thinking of other headcanons about Hange than gender and people who push the Hange is nb agenda and people who push the Hange is a female agenda and just insult each other and lynch each other are both equally unsettling. 

[winter-fox-queen]

No Cheap Thrill

Thank you to @autumnleaves1991-blog for this awesome prompt, Writer Wednesdays are lovely!  Also, thanks to @hnt-escape for encouraging me to try.  The title is from one of my favorite Suzanne Vega songs, which uses poker playing as a clever theme.  “It’ll cost you, cost you maybe more than you can pay...”

Summary:  You are a thief trying to steal a prize off a steam ship during a themed poker weekend, but a certain Statesman Agent has other plans...

Some making out, the reader is in a dress and seems fairly feminine.  No names used so can be a reader insert.  Not re-read...I wrote it yesterday, got stuck, so I changed it a bit.  

I was not best pleased with the reflection the mirror showed me.  I looked like an extra from a Maverick movie, down to my lace covered cleavage and corset top.  The skirt was full, the sapphire and black colors of my clothes, down to the jet beading decorating on the sleeves screamed expensive and highly inaccurate 1800’s costume.  At least the full skirt hid my revolver (pearl handled, must stay in costume, right?) and some assorted odds and ends.

I was on a steam ship, a steam ship with a themed poker tournament – the prize was a diamond. The diamond wasn’t the real prize. The box, with its flash drive full of dirty little secrets was.  And that was what I wanted.  Not that I’d turn down the diamond.

Tonight was just practice. The main event would be tomorrow…but before the sun rose I intended to be far, far away from here.  I went into the parlor.  

I don’t want you to think I am easily distracted.  But the second I entered the room I made my first mistake.  I let my eyes longer for far too long on a man.  

Everyone there was in costume…but he was the only one here who carried it off.  Black cowboy hat, black frockcoat, tall black boots.  His vest was tawny colored, with a hit of copper in the brocade, and saved the outfit from being too cold.  Something about him hit me in the chest.  And, stupid as I was, I let myself forget who I really was.

He noticed me staring at him and he smirked at me, tipped his hat.  He looked so damned smug – he knew he looked good, blast him.  The voice of self preservation in my head told me to ignore him.

Instead, I did my best sashay over to the gaming tables, took a seat.

I looked up.  He was still looking at me, his gaze more speculative now.  I tilted my head towards the other empty chair, and smiled.

He put down his drink and accepted my invitation.  Settling into his chair he said, “I’m Jack Daniels, what’s your name, darlin’?”

“Darling works.  You have to earn more.”  I said, as the dealer started to lay out the cards.

He grinned, sensing a challenge.  “Well, then. Let’s  play.”

He had a casual way of playing.  I hoped he would be horrible at cards, careless.  He played with the ease of someone who’d been playing all his life.

Then I made my second mistake.

I got invested.

It was a combination of things.  The way he smiled at me, his eyes lazy as they worked down my cleavage and back up. I felt the weight of his gaze like a caress, on the back of my neck, tracing my collarbone…Those dark eyes made me feel like I was melting from the inside out.  It as also the way his large hands held the cards. The way they flipped chips into the pile in the middle of the table.  Oddly graceful.  I never thought I’d ever be jealous of a stack of cardboard, but there you are.

I also liked the way his eyes crinkled, the way he praised me when I had a better hand.  It was so damned good natured.

Sexy without being sleezy. He had a sweetness to him, but also an edge.  Sometimes I would look at him and think his gaze was more sharp than it should be, but he covered it up with that good ol boy act of his.  And I found myself wanting to believe that he really did think I was that attractive.

Finally, it was just us.

“You gonna call, darlin?”

I stared at my hand. A full house.  Not much beats a full house, and I could get my money back, maybe a little of my dignity.  Jack had twisted me around his fingers and then led me to my destruction.  “I don’t…I don’t have anything left.”

He gave me another one of those looks, the kind I could feel burning my skin.  “I wouldn’t say that.”  I blushed like a virgin.

“Still.”

“Your earrings.  Toss those in.”

I took them out and threw them in.

He looked at his cards. I held my breath.  

He dropped his cards with a flourish.  Aces and eights.  

A full house, like mine.

But mine was king high. “You won.”  I said softly.

He stood up, took the earrings off the pile.  “Nice meeting you, darling.”  And left. Someone asked about the pot sitting in the middle of the table.  “Let her have it,” he said, as he worked through the crowd.  

I wanted to get up and rush after him.  But I stayed, tipped the dealer, made arrangements for my winnings.  Use the opportunity to follow the chips back to the saferoom, scope out what I could.

I took off my choker, and placed it with my chips.  “Do you mind locking this up, too?”  It had a nice sapphire on it, but wasn’t really worth much, but the banker smiled and did as I asked.  

Jack had accidentally made the next step of my plan easy.  I walked back towards my stateroom.  The necklace had a tiny sensor and camera installed.  I could pull up a lot of data on my phone, data that would…

A hand grabbed me by my upper arm, and I was pushed back against a wall.

“Jack.”  I was ashamed how relived I sounded.  Perhaps I shouldn’t have been…we were alone in a side corridor, and unlikely to be disturbed.  His eyes looked far more dangerous than warm.  His arms caged me on either side.  Something told me it would not be wise to run.

“Good evening darlin’. Did you get a good look in the saferoom yet?”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

He grinned at me, mirthless. “You’re a beautiful woman with a rather unfortunate hobby.  Do you really think I don’t know who you are? We were told someone would come for the diamond…”

I looked him in the eyes and cupped his face gently.  “I’m not here for the diamond.”

“Then why are you here?”

I pulled him a little closer.  “Why don’t you tell me, Mr. Daniels?  Maybe I’m here to distract you.”

He reached into his pocket. I felt a tug on my ear, his fingers traced their way down my neck.  I realized he’d put one of the earrings back into my ears, his touch like a ghost’s.  

“Consider me distracted.” He whispered, kissing the other side of my neck, firm enough that his moustache didn’t tickle.  I felt an ache, deep and longing, start to build.  His hand rested on my waist, his other hand coming up to replace the other earring.  

“We can do this one of two ways, sweet thing,” he drawled softly on my ear, then kissed along my jaw line, just stopping short of my lips.  I kept staring at his lips, wondering what they’d feel like on mine. Part of me felt angry, yelling in the back of my head for acting like this, lust struck over some cowboy.

“Does one of them involve you kissing me?”

He grinned a little, “It could.  Let’s see…” And he kissed me.  Gentle at first, then deeper.  I fisted his jacket labels in my hands.  

He pulled away, took my chin in one of his hands, and looked me in the eyes.  “Don’t make me do what I’ll have to, if you go back for the diamond.” He paused, and then, soft, heartfelt. “Please.”

My jaw dropped a little, and I said, moved to honesty, “The flash drive…it’s got…”

“There is no flash drive.” He said softly, dropping his hand away.

I felt the blood drain out of my face.  “The whole thing was a trap.”  I said, dully.  

“My friends picked up three other like minded souls already.  A couple more less savory characters are due in tomorrow.  I’ve read your file.  You ain’t like them, darlin.  Not yet.”

“I’m a thief.  I said with a spark of – alright, yes, misplaced – pride.  

He leaned against the wall next to me.  “And a damned good one, stealing things back for people who can’t get them back otherwise, stealing blackmail back…you’ve never actively hurt anyone.”  He paused.  “Yet.”

“Yet.”  I said softly.  

He leaned in close.  “I have a proposition for you, pretty thing.”

I hugged myself.  “What?”

His lips were so close to my ear I could feel the heat of his breath.  “Ever hear of the Statesmen?”

#agent whiskey #jack daniels x you #jack daniels x female reader #writer wednesday #fan fic

[worldwidedino]

Screw it, here’s that extra scene I was talking about. I have a title for it, but it’s technically counts as open air spoilers, and that ain’t allowed on this blog. Speaking of spoilers, this fic/fan scene has major spoilers for Owlboy, so look below the cut at your own risk. It also starts with a canon scene for context because I love my context.

Plot twist, here’s the title

I Guess Having Friends isn’t so Bad After All

Sparks were flying. The sounds of malfunctioning electronics filled the room of the pirates’ repaired flagship.

“It... It hurts... It hurts really bad... Alphonse... You abandoned us. You abandoned me. How... How could you...”

The mask on the robot shattered and slid off his face, leaving a bundle of severed, uneven wires where a face was supposed to be.

The other robot stood in shocked silence. He did this to his former comrade, he was the one who caused him this pain. The former pirate understood long before this that the scene would happen eventually, his ex-comrade was the biggest obstacle standing between his small group of social outcasts and the scourge of the Skies, the pirate captain Molstrom. But why did he have to say these things?

The dying robot chuckled, and barely managing to mutter, “I guess... Having a friend... Wasn’t so bad... After all.”

And in a blinding flash of light, he was gone. Dirk was dead. In the light, what would be the lifeless husk had disappeared.

The rest of the second Dreadnaught fiasco was a blur for Alphonse. He could end up remembering the team’s fight with Dirk and confronting Molstrom and Geddy rejoining the team in Molstrom’s quarters and saving them after storming off hours earlier because they let the self-proclaimed “world’s greatest spider”, Twig, on to their team. But he never could remember the few minutes between those events, no matter how hard he tried. He would later end up realizing the trauma of seeing one of his closest friends in the last couple of centuries dying right in front of him could and would, do that to him.

After Geddy saved the team from Molstrom’s rage, Otus had been flung out of the hole in the ship’s side caused by one of the smaller ships the human mechanic piloted. Otus landed in the arms of another owl around the same age as him named Solus.

Solus put the unconscious owl softly in the snow and said, “...Stay safe, Otus. But please don’t follow me. It’s safer if I go alone. I don’t know what’ll happen up there”.

As Solus finished talking to the unconscious owl Alphonse had run up behind the two young owls.

“Master Otus?” he asks, “Who goes there? Please tell me you’re alright.”

Solus quickly flies off without saying a word, worrying that the ex-pirate would recognize him. He heard about Alphonse and his betrayal to the pirates and halfway respected him for it. He would never be able to do it. Solus always thought of himself as too much of a coward.

“Stay safe, Otus,” Solus said to himself once he thought he was far enough away, “I hope I get to see you again once this is finished. Alphonse will take good care of you in the meantime.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alphonse picked up Otus’ unconscious body and started towards Geddy and Twig. It would be a long and difficult journey back down to Vellie since Otus was the only one with the ability of flight because of his owl cloak. Twig had his webbing to get himself places quickly, but Alphonse didn’t want to bring it up if anyone asked how to get back. He didn’t want to put the burden of mobility on Twig. Twig was still so young, Alphonse thought, 19 maybe 20 at the very oldest. Still nowhere near as young as Otus, who was no older than 13. Otus had so much stress put onto him for being such a young boy.

It was just then a little voice popped into Alphonse’s head. That voice took over all of his thoughts. “What would happen if you killed Molstrom?”, it whispered, “or maybe Asio? He’s no good for Otus, what would happen if you were to kill him?”

“Hey, Alphonse! You alright? Did you find Otus?” Geddy called.

Alphonse had just released he stopped; he quickly shook his head to try and snap himself out of his thoughts, and called back to Geddy, “Everything is fine, Master Geddy! Otus is unconscious, but he’s still alive. We should bring him back to Vellie so he can recover safely.”

Alphonse eventually caught up to Geddy and Twig. They were walking slow so it would be quicker for him to catch up since it was a long walk.

To break the silence Twig started talking. He said, “Why you look so down Alphonse? Dirk was a chronic butthole. Not saying he deserved it, but he definitely ha-”

“-Twig, please.” Alphonse begged, “You didn’t know Dirk for as long as I did. I was prepared to fight him, but not for what happened afterward.”

“Alphonse!” Geddy gasped, “What did happen exactly? You never interrupted someone like that before. Even during our first time on the Dreadnaught, you didn’t interrupt my premature celebration. And that would’ve saved people’s lives.”

“Not now, Master Geddy. I will explain it when we get back to Vellie, ” Alphonse sighed.

The rest of the walk back to Vellie was dead silent. Geddy and Twig were still in shock at Alphonse lashing out at Twig, and Alphonse was focused on not sobbing in front of his teammates.

He loved Dirk, not in a romantic way, by no means did Alphonse love, Dirk, romantically. It was purely a platonic relationship between those two. And if he knew of a way to recover any part of Dirk he could, but everything that was left of him disappeared in that flash of light. He didn't even know what would have been recoverable. He had scorched Dirk with his musket and his internal mechanics were fried by the shocks he had insured every time Alphonse had hit him. Alphonse didn't even know where to begin on understanding the anatomy of the Ancient Owls’ more specialty automatons that weren’t himself.

“I guess having a friend wasn't so bad after all…”

Dirk’s final words to Alphonse kept ringing in his head, tempting the tears out of his eyes. But he kept fighting to keep the tears in. Alphonse had always seen himself as the emotional support of the team, if he were to cry, to show some emotional weakness now, who would they trust?

How was Alphonse even supposed to know if Dirk wasn't sticking it to him for betraying the pirates one last time? You could never tell with someone like Dirk. He was hurt by Alphonse’s actions, which was painfully obvious to him but calling Alphonse his friend after going on about how friends were for the weak...

Alphonse sighed and lightly pinched the bridge of his nose between his eyes. Fighting all the tears was taking a lot of energy from him. His breath was getting shakey, and he began slightly shaking himself. Don't cry, Alphonse, he thought. You can't cry in front of them. Whatever happens, do not cry.

“You cold, Alphonse? Hurry up and you’ll get warm sooner!” Twig giggled.

Alphonse started to walk a little quicker after that. He would’ve said something, but he was afraid the shakiness of his breath would come out while he was speaking. He also didn’t want to tell them he has been constantly on the verge of tears the entire time.

Once back in Vellie, the gang of heroes quickly snuck Otus into his bed to try and avoid any suspicion of a pirate walking around the village. After the Battle for Advent, the people of Vellie were weary towards all pirates, current or not. While taking stops in Vellie, Alphonse normally just laid low in Otus’ house, it was safest there for him.

Alphonse sighed and started sadly, “I guess it’s time for that explanation I promised Master Geddy. We went to Twig’s family home after you left. There was a pirate occupation of Mesos, and Twig’s family was near the pirate’s base. After learning that we decided to drive out the pirates by entering the repaired Dreadnaught. We snuck around the best we could. That culminated in fighting Dirk and, and...And we couldn’t save him. I tried to reason with him. I didn’t want to fight him. We had no choice. And now Dirk is dead...”Alphone’s breathing became heavy and began to shake.

“You’re allowed to cry if you need to, Alphonse,” Twig said.

Geddy then added, “God knows the shit you’ve been through. You've always been here for us, it's about time we’re here for you, man.”

And with the permission to cry in front of his friends, Alphonse finally stopped fighting the tears in his eyes. He had never had the permission to cry before, so these tears were not only for Dirk but for every time he needed to cry and wasn't allowed to. Geddy and Twig saw how hard he was crying and hugged him. And if Otus was awake, he would be hugging Alphonse too.

“Thank you,” Alphonse managed to get out between tears and heavy, shaking breaths, “I appreciate you’re understanding. I-I guess having friends isn’t so bad after all.”

“No problem, man. Take however long you need.” Geddy whispered, “We’ll be here for as long as you need.”

#owlboy #dirk owlboy #alphonse owlboy #fan writing #spoilers #owlboy spoilers #mentions of death #death mention #death tw #intrusive thought tw #get Alphonse some therapy #and the entirety of the Otus squad for that matter #they all need therapy

[snarkwrites]

Title: snowbound pt 2 of 3

Theme: holiday party

Fandom / Character(s):Ben Solo/Kylo Ren x Earth!FemaleReader.

Warnings: Honestly, if you read the first part, you knwo already. I am not a medical professional, nor am I a hardcore Star Wars fangirl, merely a casual fan. There is no blood!tw here, but.. There is still an injury!tw, because he ain’t just gonna heal over night. Oh and if you can handle reading my own personal take on Ben Solo (his father’s son, fyi) then you’ll be okay with him being construed as OOC. If not, sorry? Pls don’t murder me?

Word Count: 4k. Shit. I got carried away again, didn’t I?

Okay, so here’s the thing... That first part really got me in the mood to write a follow up. So, here we are. Even if it’s the biggest flop on my entire goddamn blog, I got these ideas out of my head and... materialized somehow. This is my second daily entry for my bb @champbucks over on the @12daysofchristmas challenge blog...

OH YEAH.. for the sake of a timeline here.. This part takes place  two and a half weeks later and part three will take part a day or so, maybe two, after part two. Trust me, this needed to be said.

Also, again.. I made the banner for this. Don’t steal or repost.

TAGGING:

@andie01 @helluvawriter and @kyleoreillysknee 

@champbucks and @12daysofchristmas

[ about my writing | masterlist | multifandom tag doc ]

“Are you even listening to me right now, Katie?”

My sister’s question and the annoyed tone she asked it in had me shifting my focus from watching Ben chop firewood down in the yard to at least making an honest attempt to keep up with our conversation. I rolled my eyes when I heard her annoyed sigh.

It took everything in me to remind her that I wasn’t a child.

She’s always been like this, and frankly, it has everything to do with why I don’t try to see her more than once or twice a year, when she insists on all of us siblings gathering at Grandma’s cabin to have a family dinner and pictures.

“What?” I asked, gazing out the window already, distracted all over again. Ben had shed the black thermal shirt now, it was tied around his waist. Each swing of the axe sent muscular arms and broad shoulders to flexing and that had me more than a little mesmerized at the moment. I tried to tear my eyes away. 

,, just like this morning when we had that awkward moment in the bathroom.” my mind taunted me and I sighed, turning away from the window and wandering into the kitchen. “I gotcha. You’ll do the turkey because I can’t cook. It’s already baking and you guys will all be here at 4:30. I need to have the oven turned on so things can finish. I’m not stupid. We do this every single year.”

“I’m doing you a huge favor, trust me, Katie. You wouldn’t be interested in all of this stuff. You’re barely listening to me now. Did you get the girls what I told you to get them both for Christmas?”

I glared at the phone in my hands, dragging one of them through my hair, tousling it a little. “You do realize I actually cook. And I’m pretty good at it. Oh and by the way… I’m not a child. I’d prefer it if you called me Katherine.”

She paused, hesitating. “I’d… really rather not risk the Christmas dinner on your hurt feelings. I’ll prepare most of it, you can do the potatoes!” she said it cheerfully, as if she were offering an olive branch.

She made it seem as if I were incapable of the simplest tasks. She probably didn’t even trust me to do the mashed potatoes either and that thought had me exhaling sharply in irritation as I pinched the bridge of my nose and grumbled to myself about her always doing this. And honestly, I didn’t care if she heard me or not.

The chopping stopped outside and I saw Ben walking from the pile of wood and up onto the porch. The door creaked open and Ben leaned in the doorway, filling it, gazing at me with a brow raised and arms folded over a bare chest.

I held up a finger and turned my attention back to the phone conversation with my older sister, pacing the area right in front of him as I did, lightly kicking at the little wooden table beside the door when she sighed again and for the fourth time, she reminded me calmly, “We’ll have it at 5. Like always.”

Ben tensed a little nearby and he eyed the phone in my hands as if he were picking up on my tension and current level of irritation. I mouthed to him, “It’s my nag of an older sister. The one you heard me talking to last Tuesday?”

He spoke up. “Katherine, I’ve gotten the firewood cut.” an amused smirk played at lips I’ve only dreamed of kissing practically every single night for the better part of two weeks now.

And almost immediately, I froze, biting my lip. Now, I wasn’t dumb. I knew that I’d have to explain Ben being here to my older sisters, but I just… I hadn’t bothered to do so as of yet.

“Is there someone there with you, Katie?”

“Again, it’s Katherine. And yes. My boyfriend, actually. He’s been staying out here with me. But you wouldn’t know, because you only call before Thanksgiving or Christmas and every night until we get together for those occasions. Now I’m gonna get off here. That oven’s not gonna turn itself on. Bye.” I said it pointedly and before my sister could ask anything else or bother me further, I disconnected the call.

I could feel the weight of his stare, I didn’t even have to be looking at him. And honestly, I didn’t dare.

Instead, I made my way into the kitchen, fuming out loud as I turned on the oven. Then again, as I rummaged through cabinets to find pots and pans and my grandma’s old recipe book.

I was so caught up in my tantrum, I didn’t hear Ben slip into the kitchen behind me.

I turned abruptly and found myself body to body with him.

“Why do you insist on putting everything out of your reach?” Ben smirked down at me as he stepped closer, reaching out to grab the pot that I’d been trying to get. He held it out to me and I swallowed hard. I tried to answer his question, but nothing was coming. All I could focus on was how close we stood. And of course, the way he was staring down at me right now.

I shrugged in lieu of an answer and put the pot to the side. For a few hot and heavy seconds, all either one of us really did was stare at the other. Finally, Ben spoke.

“Boyfriend, hm?”

,, think, think, oh my god, holy shit, think..” my brain was going into panic shutdown mode. I eyed him and gave a sheepish shrug. “It was the first thing I could think of. Trust me, my sister is NOT someone you want knowing exactly what happened to you. She’d probably break her neck to go report it to that damn base. And they’d be down here, breathing down everyone’s neck. It’s… Better this way.” I licked my lips, swallowing hard as I stared up at him intently.

He chuckled, shrugging himself as if it didn’t bother him at all. And why would it, you absolute goof? My brain immediately saw fit to remind me, this is just a ruse. When he’s healed completely and he’s got his ship going again, he’ll just leave.” and the thought had a pout forming. I was staring down at the old wooden floorboards.

Or at least I was until Ben’s fingers tucked beneath my chin and he made me look right up at him, that shit-eating smirk plastered on his face as he did so.

I’ve learned over the course of the past two and a half weeks… Ben’s a little on the cocky side sometimes. When he’s not being all broody and quiet. Or almost borderline teasing me on occasion.

“If it keeps this military you speak of out of my way, I’ll do it.”

And the exact second that his tongue trailed over his lips and he gave that smirk again, it was all I could do not to melt.

I digress, I will be a raw bundle of nerves before he’s all healed and he’s gotten his ship repaired.

We were doing it again, that thing where we wind up migrating closer together. Hips brushing against each other. I cleared my throat and glanced down at the walking cast that Doc had swapped him over to at the beginning of the week. “Excuse me, sir.. But I distinctly recall Doc saying to stay off your foot as much as possible.”

“And I would if I hadn’t seen that our heat source was about to run out, woman. How is someone so small still somehow so bossy?” Ben chuckled, that hint of teasing in his tone. I gulped and managed to grumble a little as I shrugged in answer to what he’d said. 

“Go sit down.”

“You come sit down too. If she’s so determined to do it all herself, let her.”

I tensed a little and eyed him. Pretty sure my anger was written all over my face because he chuckled and eyed me, making himself taller. “You let her get to you.”

“I’ve always let her get to me.” I sighed, shrugging it off as best as I could. We were inching closer all over again and my breath caught in my throat as I felt his hand lingering at my hip. “Perhaps you shouldn’t.”

“Oh trust me. After you’ve had her around a few hours later tonight, you’ll see exactly why she gets so far under my skin.”

“Or maybe, she just needs someone who knows how to get under her skin.”

I laughed a little, eyeing him. “Oh, you’re confident now. But her royal naggingness has not arrived yet, either.. Neither have the other two, Margo and Cecilia.”

He chuckled, leaning down a little, his face almost well within kissing distance. “Did you just challenge me,hm?”

“Nope. Just know how crazy my older sisters tend to drive pretty much fucking everyone with their micromanagement and overall nosiness and assholery.” I dared to raise up a little, my face inching just a smidge closer to his. To a point where we lightly bumped noses. But Ben still wasn’t backing away. In fact… If I didn’t know better, I’d almost swear he moved just a little closer. And smirked down at me the entire time he was doing so.

The sound of a vehicle idling outside had me swallowing hard and turning a little, groaning almost the second I realized that apparently, Cecilia had decided to get here earlier than Margo or Dinah. “Well shit. This is a first.”

Ben’s gaze followed mine and he nodded towards Cecilia. Who as usual bought wine and a few presents and was wearing clothing that I honestly didn’t see how she wasn’t going to catch her death in.

“Margo and Dinah are gonna have a field day now. Dinah will have an absolute shit fit, because she wants us all to dress similar in the photos she’s gonna make us take.”

“Photos?” Ben questioned, a brow raised. I held up my cell phone and explained with a shrug, “It’s basically the same thing here as what you all do with your data pads back where you’re from, I’d think.” 

The door was being knocked on and I caught eyes with Ben, taking a few shaky breaths. “And we’re up… Are you sure you’re okay with this, Ben?”

“You said this was the only way. And from what you’ve told me about this military, I’d really rather not have to deal with them. Make no mistake. I could, easily. But I’d rather not.” that cocky smirk was back and there was this look in his eyes that I couldn’t quite get a proper read on.

It had my knees feeling as if they were going to go all weak and rubbery on me.

XXX

My sisters had finally all gotten to the cabin. My nieces and my nephew were running all over the yard, with my sisters husbands outside to supervise.

Ben had kind of wandered outside himself, leaning against the side of the cabin, arms folded over his chest as he watched my nieces and nephew laughing and playing. And I felt bad for him because I knew exactly just how much of this kind of thing he didn’t have as a kid. His early years had been all about training. Control.

Dinah cleared her throat and I turned around, facing my sisters. “What?”

“Boyfriend, huh?” Cecilia mused, giving me a teasing grin. Of my three sisters, Cecilia was probably the one I got along with decently. So I knew when she said it, it was kind of her being wistful because she is a magnet… For all the worst guys.

“You’re always saying you’re too busy. And your internship takes up all your time.” Margo echoed, giving a suspicious gaze in Ben’s general direction. I bit my cheek to keep from snapping out an answer at her, because as usual, Margo seemed to be almost accusing me of something.

Dinah eyed Ben and then looked at me. “Where on Earth did you meet him? I mean… He doesn’t seem like your type, Katie.”

I shrugged. Why was it their business? Anyway, I’m at least 90 percent sure that a man like Ben can have his pick of women. It’s highly illogical to think he’d choose me to begin with. And I knew that. I guess that’s why it bothered me so much because my sisters questions since all of them arrived seemed to further imply and echo my own thoughts.

I cut my eyes at Dinah and gave her a dirty look. “It’s Katherine. And what the hell does that mean?”

“Well,I just mean that I always pictured the guy you wound up with a little more like… That guy from X files.. And not an actual hunk.”

“Fox Mulder is a hunk, by the way. But what the hell does that mean?”

“Are you sure you really know him? I mean it seems sudden.” Dinah went quiet, biting her cheek as she shuffled her feet and eyed me expectantly. “You never mentioned him and then Bam, today, you’re telling me you have a live in boyfriend.”

“Oh my god, wait.. You two are living together?” Margo’s eyes widened as she looked at me.

“And she barely knows him.” Dinah interrupted, irritated because whatever she’d been trying to say without saying before was obviously being interrupted and cast to the side.

I glared at Dinah and shrugged, answering Margo. “Kind of. It’s temporary. Kind of like a test drive?” I did my best at being convincing, but the entire time I was saying it, the feeling of dread I’d been having about Ben’s upcoming departure rushed right back to the forefront. But I shoved it down again. I already know I don’t have a shot in hell there, there’s no sense in dreading it or letting it get to me.

Not when we were already such good friends. Anything further would be risking the total ruin of that. And I didn’t want to.

“Since when? And are there more out there like him?” Cecilia asked quietly, staring dead at him and fanning herself as she did. 

“Since like… a week after Thanksgiving?” I scratched my head as I thought back. Had it really been that long? My mind was blown because it honestly felt like only yesterday that I was finding the crash site for his ship.

The weeks following seemed to have just flown by. And the realization of just how much time had really passed only made me stop and think about just how much I was dreading Ben’s departure.

“You two don’t act like a couple.” Dinah spoke up, insistent. Margo glared at her and I sighed, shrugging. “Not everybody is into over the top PDA. Why do you always insist there’s more to something than there really is?”

“Yeah, Di? Can’t you just let Katherine be happy?”

“If she didn’t have crap judgement..” Dinah trailed off, glancing at me awkwardly. I tensed and rolled my eyes. “If you ever wonder why we never talk more than twice a year, Di? This. This is exactly why. You’re not my mother and I’m not a fucking child.”

I don’t know what got into me, but I was snapping and storming away before I could bother to censor myself or stop. And it felt so good. I stormed into the house to check on the food and just be alone for a few minutes.

To my surprise, Ben cleared his throat from the doorway of the kitchen before stepping in and sliding the doors closed.

“Are you alright? I heard what your sister was saying.”

I took a deep breath and shrugged. “Just ready for the afternoon to be over. She’s second guessing the whole thing and if she pushes too hard, digs too much I’m afraid that she’ll... “ I trailed off, going quiet. Ben swallowed hard and nodded, giving me this look that showed he understood.

And from the doorway, Dinah’s throat cleared.

“I came to talk to my sister.”

Ben tensed.

“She’s got nothing to say to you.”

His tone came out so calm and yet so angry that it had me glancing up at him. He was glaring at Dinah. Dinah’s mouth opened and closed and she looked from me to Ben. I gave her a half hearted smirk and she eyed us both, almost like she were determined to believe that we were lying and she wanted to dig the truth out.

Ben’s arms slipped around my waist and before I could stop myself, I gasped quietly, sort of melting right against him. “Katherine, all that’s wrong with your sister is that she’s jealous. She’s always been jealous.”

I eyed Dinah and a brow raised when I realized that Ben’s words had hit a very tangible mark. She flinched and her mouth opened and closed, and then when she had nothing to say, her lips pursed and she grumbled quietly, “I don’t trust you, Ben.”

“And I don’t particularly care for you, Dinah.” Ben snapped, giving a shrug when she gaped at him as if she were shocked that he’d dare to speak to her that way.

“You’re going to let him talk to me like this?” Dinah gaped at me and I shrugged, snuggling myself against Ben just a little bit, gazing up at him over my shoulder before turning my attention back to her. “Why wouldn’t I? You’re the one who’s acting like an asshole.”

“I literally cannot deal with you. I’m leaving.” Dinah stormed out of the kitchen, calling to her husband and my nieces. “Kids, get in the car.”

Margo and Cecilia eyed my sister and gave each other a look before hurrying inside, shutting the door behind them.

“Whatever you two did, we’re gonna need you to do it again next year.”

Ben chuckled, shrugging. “I just pointed out that she seemed to be jealous of Katherine.”

“Oh, damn.. That went well.” Margo laughed, smiling as she shook her head. Cecilia turned to me and nodded her head back at Ben. “I like him.”

“Wait.. you two weren’t on her side every single time?”

“What? No.”

“I just never said anything because I know she’s been having problems in her own life for years.” Margo mused and this got her a look from both Cecilia and I. Margo gave a shrug and explained calmly, “Her husband’s leaving her in January. For the secretary at his firm. Not only that, she’s got laid off last year and she decided to do the stay at home mom thing and it’s been depressing her. And when we were kids, she was jealous of you and Cecilia because you two were always doing things and she never really got to do any of that… Especially after dad died…”

“She didn’t have to take care of us? We had grandma. Everything was fine.”

“She didn’t think so. You know what a control freak she is, Katherine.” Margo sighed and shook her head. “I have wanted to tell her to grow up and get over it for years now. Just never had the heart to because I knew why she was like that.”

Cecilia and I shared a look.

Ben cleared his throat.

“Is the food in the oven supposed to be burning? Because it smells like it’s starting to.”

“Shit.”

“Listen.. We all know Dinah’s turkey is dry every single year. Let’s just find a pizza place or something?”

I nodded, laughing. “If she were here, she’d be throwing a fit.”

“You three can’t even wait until I’ve actually left to let everything go to shit?” Dinah wandered back into the kitchen, opening the oven and glaring at my sisters and I.

“You let the turkey burn?”

“I thought you were going home.”

“And I was… Until I realized that grandma would be disappointed in all of us. Me, especially.” Dinah was squirming. She’s never enjoyed apologizing. I laughed and shook my head. “Listen, if Jim is going to walk out, let him. The guy’s a fucking jerk anyway. I just never said so because I thought you liked… that kind of guy.” I advised.

Cecilia dug around in the drawers for the corkscrew to open her wine and Margo spoke up after a few seconds. “Just let everything go, Di. Life’s too fucking short, okay? We’re literally all we have left now.”

Dinah mulled it over, nodding. She eyed Ben, who was hanging back, leaning in the doorway with his arms folded across his chest. “Maybe I was wrong about you. I just… I got suspicious because that one,” she nodded towards me, “Doesn’t typically get involved with anyone, let alone let her guard down enough to trust.”

I could feel Ben’s eyes on me, but I didn’t dare look up to meet his gaze, instead, I focused on pouring myself a glass of wine.

XXX

I shut the door behind me and leaned against it. “Thank God. That’s done for another year.” I laughed out the words and Ben chuckled quietly. “Wasn’t that bad.”

“I mean..” I trailed off, going quiet. I knew from the little bits about himself that he’d told me, he’d never really been that close to his family. And when he’d chosen the path that he’d chosen in life, they’d only gotten further apart.

I got the feeling there was so much more to it than that, but I didn’t push. It wasn’t my business. Even though I hurt for him, because there had been points throughout the day that I could look at him and tell that he longed to have a family, even if all they did was fight. Like… maybe he regretted whatever he’d done immensely.

I sank down on the couch beside him, staring at my hands for a few seconds, nothing but the sound of the fire crackling in the fireplace filling the room.

“I’m almost healed.” Ben muttered. I glanced up at him, biting my lip and nodding, forcing a smile. “You are! Hey, if you want… I can get one of Doc’s friends to come out and move your ship back to the cabin… So you can use the garage and the barn out back to work on it?”

Ben nodded after a few seconds, muttering quietly, “Yes.”

After he’d fallen silent for seconds that seemed to stretch into hours on my end, he spoke up again. “I’ve actually enjoyed being here.”

“Honestly, I’ve enjoyed you being here. And I’m not really a people person.”

Ben chuckled. “Neither am I.”

I scooted a little close, tentatively leaning against him. “Sorry you got pulled into all that crap.”

He shrugged. “Wasn’t that bad.” as he chuckled and asked quietly, “Is it like that every year?”

I shook my head. “No, because usually, Margo and Cecilia and I just ignore her. Or do whatever she’s nagging at us to do. Just to keep the peace.”

“Oh.”

“But it’s fine, she honestly needed to hear everything we were all saying earlier. She’s always been… Overbearing.”

“Overbearing is just one word.” Ben mused, making me laugh and reassure him quietly, “I’m fine. I have a thick skin.”

He chuckled and nodded in agreement as he eyed the glass of wine I was sipping. I held it out and he took a sip, spitting it out.

“That’s awful.”

“It’s not!”

“It’s utter swill, woman.” Ben dragged a hand over his mouth and my eyes caught on the movement. I gulped and stood abruptly. Because if I didn’t, if I kept sitting there, I was going to do something dumb.. Like kiss him.

And if he’s going to leave soon, that’s the last thing I want to do.

I’ll only wind up getting hurt if I keep getting too close. I have to remind myself of that a lot lately.

#12 days of christmas #12daysofchristmas #ben solo fanfiction #ben solo fanfic #ben solo imagine #ben solo imagines #my writing; ben solo #my fics; ben solo #my moodboards; ben solo #SUBTITLE HERE: the one in which ben and reader are fake dating

[popculturebuffet]

The Loud House Valentine’s Day Double Feature (Back in Black and Stage Plight) or My My My Once Bitten Twice Shy

What is up my Loudites? And while I am returning to the Loud House I do have some sad news to get out of the way first.. i’m ending regular coverage of the Loud House. I don’t like doing this.. but when I picked up the show, I didn’t really have a set schedule.. and that was a bad thing as I didn’t get nearly everything I wanted done. Now I have one and honestly it’s been great: it allows me to stay focused and if I end up not feeling what I was going to do that day, provided it’s not a comission or specfically needed that day, I can swap things around a bit easier. 

The reason I bring this up is Nick’s way of scheduling means I CAN’T reasonably put the show on the schedule. They often don’t announce airdates until the wee before, which isn’t a bad thing WATCHING, and isn’t unresonable for a children’s network. But for someone who likes to have a concrete schedule at the top of the month, still flexable and able to make changes if they come up but at least some idea of what i’ll be doing and when, that’s a non-starter, as not knowing when a show’s going to be there or not really messes with things. In contrast Disney puts up their entire programming schedule for next month towards the end, so I know if a show’s coming back, and thus that it’ll probably be around for next month’s too. And if it goes away a week earlier than expected then super I have that space for other sttuff. But I just have too much other stuff, paid and on my own time, to keep friday’s open in perpetuity.

I will however still reviewing the show infrequently as I still love it, Season 5 will probably have plenty of episodes I want to talk about, already it has Leni running for mayor which sounds like one of my wonky spinoff ideas and I love it all the more for that, and ther’es tons of episodes I have and haven’t seen to dig into. So like Lori I won’t be in the house on a daily basis but i’m still going to show up a lot. I already have an April Fools special planned, as well as a retrospective ready for some time in the future. And of course if more Sam and Luna episodes show up, you know i’ll be on those as fast as humanly possible so yeah not leaving the show.. just not coveirng it because I like having some control of my schedule, it’s a thing with me. 

Good then we can get to why your ACTUALLY reading this unless you’ve already scrolled past or scrolled up to this. Next Sunday is Valentine’s Day, and so to continue Valnetine’s Shenanigans on this fine blog, i’m doing some romantic style episodes of the loud hosue for you. I did intend for this to be bigger, but frankly i’ve been running behind on reviews and running out of steam lately, so I paired it down to the two I wanted to do most. So for today we’ll be covering two of the show’s couples: One they badly need to bring back and I question why they haven’t, and one that I feel has gotten a lot of flack for things that aren’t it’s fault. Both are really adorable so expect some awkward blushing, bats, blood, and other stuff rhyming with B under the cut!

Back in Black: So we begin our double feature with Lucy

Yeah I have not covered this adorable harbinger of death enough on this blog, and intended to do this one, among other lucycentric episodes back in october.. and the fact I didn’t is a good argument for why I have a schedule now ain’t it? But sometimes your plans not panning out right at the exact time you planned them works out for you. Not getting to do Plan 9 From Mission Hill during Pride Month meant I got to do it on comission later. And not getting to do this one at Halloween means it still works fine just fine for valentine’s day.  

So we begin the episode with Lincoln working on his science project, with Rusty coming over to help. 

Shockingly though not only is he not just taking a nap or hitting on Lincon’s sisters while Lincoln works but actually helping, he’s actually good at it. I’m as suprsied as you. Though this is early in his characterization, so he hasn’t’nt been established as horribly sucking at everything or his friends being done with his bullshit QUITE yet. Give him time.  This is an interesting moment in the character’s history though, as it’s the episode that firmly establishes him as a close friend of Lincolns. While he was already turned from a member of a random violence gang to LIncoln’s buddy in the span of season 1, this episode cements him as one of his closer pals simply by him coming over and the two being fairly familiar with one another. Granted by that same token Girl Jordan should be in the group.. and I have nothing to add to that. Add Girl Jordan to the Lincrew. Just do it. 

Anyways Rusty brought his brother along. And you’d expect me to be terrified as there’s now three of them. But.. nope I like Rocky. He’s a chill kid and his personality goes together well with Lucy’s as while he’s a more typical kid, he’s still very subdued in his emotions like she is. Also he mentions both parents so my divorce theory.. is honestly still valid as this was three seasons ago and I could buy their mother left during that time. 

And yes Lucy’s in love.. and stalking him a bit as she follows him around the house sighing while he wonders who did that.. though it is a nice clue their compatible. When you can sense the presence of someone whose big running gag is showing up out of nowhere to scare the crap out of people that means something. And it’s either that you’d really get that person or your Wolverine. Or one of his kids. Or his clones. Or clones of his clones. What i’m saying is Rusty’s mom banged the wolverine and his family tree is really weird even by marvel standards. 

But I do give her a pass as she’s not trying to be creepy or obsessive, she just doesn’t know how to talk to him as he’s your average kid and she’s a creature of the night. It’s just a kid being shy which is very refreshing both because pre-savnio being fired the show had some very messed up ideas about relationships and gender politics at times, the latter of which actually crops up here, and because having grown up with the cartoons of the 90′s and 2000′s.. I had to put up with things like this. 

Full Disclosure: I DO ship sonamy.. but only after around Sonic Chronicles, where Bioware and then Sega decided to not make “Constantly harasses sonic despite him clearly not being interested and saying so vocally” and “Obessess over him to a point I worry she’s going to break his legs so he’ll never run away from her again”, as well as aging her up from 12. Still find her ungodly annoying at best and terrible at worst before that point, Sonic CD and Sonic Advance excluded. And yes I am that huge of a nerd, damn proud of it too. 

What i’m getting at is that a little girl unable to talk to a guy and only being kinda creepy because that’s what she does is LEAGUES better than “IT’S NOT CREEPY WHEN A WOMAN DOES IT”. Given this episode was written by a woman that probably helped a lot if not entirely but I don’t blame her for that.. more on that later. 

Point is she’s smitten but her first attempt to talk goes back as he rushes to leave after she tries talking to him.. and also appears out of nowhere to spook him. Come on man, your better than that. YOu sensed her before why not now? Up your game. But yeah Lucy’s depressed while Lincoln talks to her about it, about them leaving and once Lucy confesses she’s into rocky asks what he’s into. Lincoln.. has no idea as he’s barely been around Rocky. He’s just an average kid he dosen’t quite understand. Normal is the word he uses and Lucy ponders that.  We next see the three most traditionally feminine sisters, Lori, Leni and Lola, all pissed someone stole their stuff, though Lori does suspect Lola at first because let’s face it, this fits her MO of being an entitled brat and not being above petty theft. But no the culprit is Lucy who genuinely apologizes and understands that their mad but the other girls are fine with it given the context, which Lucy explained, and are happy to make her over.  This is where the problem I was hinting at comes in: ALL the girls are on board with this makeover plan. the problem is.. only the three who came in in the first place make actually sense making Lucy more tradiotnally feminine. Lori loves fashion and is a control freak who has troubles with empathy at times especially at this point in the series, Leni while not INTETIONALLY hurtful is kind of ditzy and thus can miss some cues, and Lola has a yawning starless void where her soul should be. For these three? Yeah this plot actually makes sense they wouldn’t think of Lucy’s feelings and actually help her use who she is to get rocky or tell her it doesn’t matter she’s beautiful as she is.. then presumably bring the wrath of god down on that poor child before things were cleared up.  The issue is more dragging the other sisters into it. It only fits the three above to really give a shit about making Lucy more “normal” and “Girly” and “Other stereotypical bullshit”. Luna is very chill and empathetic and would be the first to say “Wait maybe making her the opposite of herself isn’t a good idea”, Luan is likewise empathetic though I could possibly see it she really doesn’t need to be in this plot, Lynn ENTIRELY doesn’t fit as she prefers sports and getting dirty and what not and is the closest to Lucy out of the sisters and thus would probably be the most defensive about her not changing and that could’ve actually been interesting, Lana would be the same minus the being closest and Lisa is coldly detached a lot of the time and wouldn’t care about any of this on a good day. It feels HORRIBLY offensive and out of character to have them all suddenly be “nah your not girly enough”. These girls don’t give a shit about whose more feminine than who and it’s really bad to pidgeonhole them as that.  However.. I dont’ blame episode writer Gloria Shen entirely for this. She wrote it, she gets some of the discredit.. but she didn’t DIRECT the episode and a LOT can change from page to screen. No  THAT was series creator and known sexual preadator Chris Savino. And i’m not just blaming him because he’s a creepy asshole, but because the seasons he directed, seasons 1, 2 and most of 3, had a bad habit of having episodes where all the girls acted as a group and often to weak ends, like the green house, the one where they all fought, the gender swap episode or  heavy meddle.. which is a headache for another day. Point is it doesn’t surprise me he didn’t fix this or even genuinely cared to differentiate  them and it’d be until next season where the show fully became an ensemble piece. SO yeah I blame him on this not for his horrible history, but simply because it sounds like his writing style and as director, and a producer on the show, he had the power and responsibility to fix things and did nothing. So if it wasn’t directly his fault in the first place , he certainly didn’t fix it, call it out in storyboarding or well anything. So yeah shared blame all around.

So after a makeover montage, Lucy is uh... well I can’t describe the abomination they’ve created. 

I mean.. none of it works, and I think that’s very much the intent, dosen’t make it any less horrifying. Nothing about this is right: makeup REALLY shouldn’t go on a child in any circumstace so the blush on her cheeks is creepy and makes her look like one of those creepy porcelian dolls that i’m 100% sure either are planning to kill us all one day or were made to keep the souls of the damned trapped inside forever. The ear rings just look creepy and again are a bit much for an 8 year old, and the blonde hair just brings it all together. The pink outfit is fine.. I guess but the face is just so unsettling I can’t process the rest of her outfit and i’m not even going to try. 

Point is she looks terrifying, and not in the fun way she usually does, and Rocky dosen’t know what to make of this. Oh and if your wondering why he’s here Lynn just.. took a hockey stick to Lincoln’s project to get the Spokes Boys back over here, and Lisa mocked him for pointing out the obvious holes in their plan despite being 4 and LIncoln having a girlfriend at this point. Granted his relationship with Ronnie Anne at this point is also kinda effed up, but given you all pushed him in this direction, Lisa still has no room to talk and they amicably broke up at some point once the writers decided “Let’s pretend like this never happened and they were just friends, despite her being introduced with a crush on him and us still replaying episodes with said relationship in play, instead of actually dealing with this directly”. You may be easily able to guess what hte retrospective’s about at this point.  So Lori comes in for phase two .. WITH BOBBY!

Just.. I cannot tell you how much I needed my boy to calm me down after the last two scenes of horribly off character writing and ... that thing up there. He dosen’t do much this episode but every episode is better with Bobby and that’s a scientefic fact. So Lori claims they had a double date fall through which Bobby barely follows along with.. and it does kinda feel pressurey to kinda force Rocky’s hand here but her intentions ARE good, and a group date is a good way to relive presssure. It just ends up falling through becaue Lori wants her to act intentionally helpless, which makes no sense both for Lori’s personality given how driven and controlling she is and how Bobby clearly knows both things and likes the first and she worked on the second for him. So yeah the golf date falls through and Lori apologizes for being a bitch about all of this, as they all do, which again. .has me questioning WHY we needed the whole sister group instead of just Lori and co. Or even just Lori. The show REALLY needed to learn character ballance and while it is struggling on occasion, as seen with how lincolncentric this season has been so far, this episode reminds me it used to be MUCH worse. 

But Lucy thanks them because their intetnions were good, i’m going to need a citation on that given it came off as them wanting her to change because they found her weird nad not because they genuinely wanted to help her, and goes off to sulk about being alone. Lincoln dosen’t know what to do till the next day where, again suprisingly, Rusty had the right idea and had them come over to his place. We also find out he’s scared of blood.. which.. I can relate to. Seriously i’ve only insulted the guy once the whole episode

But we find that out because Rocky made his own because he actually found Lucy’s really cool, what a kid. So Lincoln gets the brothers over to his house by damaging the project himself then claming they need to go back and once he sees Lucy’s around has Rocky go into the kitchen to get them some sodas which he agrees to because why not. 

So in a nice little change-up on the running gag Rocky shows up startling Lucy and we get a really fucking cute scene as they hash things out. They have a normal conversation, finally getting past their shared awkwardness, in part because he admits he prefers her as herself.  As it turns out Rocky wasn’t scared.. he just thought she was too cool for him and felt intimidated and like Lucy had no idea what to say. The two then blush and after my heart melts and I freeze it back into shape in a few hours, the two decide to go look at her coffin collection and the next day proudly show off their perfected fake blood.. which destroys the project one more time. WAH WAH WAH. Oh rusty... I knew I could count on you to fuck up at least once. 

Back in Black Final Thoughts: First off Black in Black: Weird Name. I mean it kinda gives the game away, not that fans would thikn horrifying mistake lucy would stick but still, and dosen’t really fit. Call it “Why Do Ghoul’s Fall in Love” or something like that or something related to makeovers. Makeover Mistep. Don’t Make Me Over. Makeover Your Case... okay that last one sounds more like the Legally Blond equilvent of Cobra Kai but the point is it’s just weird.  Outside of the parts I already went in detail about why their dreadful.. this ep is pretty good. That one bit isn’t enough to derail the episode, merley take it’s goodness down a notch, and Lucy is genuinely fun to watch and her heartbreak is hard to watch, and Rocky was an engaging new character with lots of potetial. A large part of why I did this episode. is to ask WHY he hasn’t come back. Rusty’s now a major character, to the point he’s co-headlining an episode next week with Zach... why Zach’s getting an episode, a SECOND one at that I have no earthly idea but the point is the show’s getitng comfortable enought heir giving lincoln’s friends starring episodes without him too, as Liam got one , if alongside Lynn the power couple of 2021 I tells ya. My point is, besides when is Stella getting an episode dammit, that Rocky really should make a come back as he both provides another character for Rusty and the rest of the lincrew to bounce off of, and he and Lucy had genuine chemstiry and now she has her OWN cast there’s an easy story there about her friends reaction to her dating a non goth. There’s a lot of story potetial with this precious boy bring him back.  But overall Pretty in Black is a decent episode, worth checking out if you haven’t seen it and rewatching even if you have.

Stage Plight: So we open with Luann, whose one of my personal faviorites along with Leni, Luna, and Lucy. Granted I haven’t checked out her yearly bouts of going ax crazy on her family yet, but we’ll see in april. But outside of that, which is easy enough to isee iven it’s three episodes out of 214 where she’s like this and she gets her compuance, I find her precious, awkward, and entertaining, from her habit of saying “Get it “ to her love of puns, to the fact she’s essentially a wholesome version of the batman villian the ventriloquist..

Yeah in case you forgot about this gag, she often talks through her dummy Mr. Coconuts.. who functions as her sounding board and helps her figure things out, talks like he’s from the 40′s or 50′s, and in general is a delight. He also once or twice, including this episode acts of his own free will so I don’t know if this is a Child’s Play situation and a dying comedian put his body in her dummy and she’s just rolling with it, if she somehow put a piece of her soul in a dummy or what the hell’s going on here. Compared to the series recently what with it’s mayoral campagins, children murdering guys, and actualy factual spies, this is mildly sane. MIldly. This may also be a serious and untreated case of Disociative Identnity Disorder, but given it’s not framed that way, and Coconuts just seems to be Luann’s way of talking with herself, for now she has’nt gone full vintriloquist. Thoguh givne her april fools day behavior and her profession as a comedian, she probably WILL become the new joker at a some point. 

So the two are talking about Luann’s crush on Benny. Benny was introduced back in L is for Love and is one of the only three love interests there to actually return, and along with Sam the only onen to get multiple episodes about their relationship with their respective loud and a full personality. He was also MASSIVELY hated. For those who joined the fandom more recently, Luann was massively shipped with Maggie, an emo girl who showed up in Luann’s second spotlight episode and one where she didn’t torment her entire family, one I still need to see but have read about. It was pretty cute and nothing was wrong with that or the opposites attract dynamic. But said fans got REALLY and understandibly upset about his introduction and were presumibly none too happy he got to return and got his roll expanded.  And I.. genuinely like the kid. I have nothing against Maggie and in fact poly ship her with both Luann and Benny, as both seem like they’d be open to that and her dour demanor creates a nice contrast between the chipper luann and the somewhat chipper but also chill benny in the middle. I just feel he’s a very likeable character, sweet and awkward and very much on Luann’s wavelength. Like Sam he’s SIMILAR to his love intrest, having Luann’s love of puns, mime and the theater, but is also not quite as giggly about it and as I said has a bit more of a chill to him, in contrast to how sam is slightly more energetic to Luna’s near constant calm off stage. 

I also like him because he’s voiced by Sean Giabrone, an up and coming voice actor who I first met watching the Goldbergs as Adam. His other biggest role so far has been playing Jeff on Clarence, though he’s currently picked up another lead voice roll as Yumulack on Solar Opposites, easily one of the best parts of that show, and has done othe rminor and recurring work, but I feel he’s got the potetial to have a long and fruitful career in voice acting if he wants it. I mean he’s far from the first former ABC star or former Ron Stoppable to make a long and successful voice career of himself. Be the next will fredle man you can do it. 

But yeah I like him and think their cute together and feel demonizing a ship for one that had a low chance of happening isn’t fair, especially when you know, we’re in a fandom where incest runs rampant and is STILL a recurring problem to this day. Pick your fucking battles for god’s sake. As I mentioned you can put maggie in with this relationship or Still ship luaggie regardless. 

So back in the episode Luann and Coconuts notice Benny signing up for the school play and decide to join him. 

Yeah i’ve noticed that a LOT of school set plots are about one of the mains joining a play to either be near or play romantic lead with their crush, or romantic hyjinks happening anyway.  Seriously i’ts a lot. I DID think most of them were around romeo and juliet, and Proud Family, Pepper Anne, and Ned’s Declassified all are probably why, it’s actually way more diverse and i’m happy to give credit to shows and movies for that:  Jimmy Neutron used Macbeth (IN SPACEEEEEE), American Dragon Jake Long used Antony and Cleopatra, as did the comic strip Foxtrot (That one I remembered), Daria used the canterbury tales, Arrested Development used Much Ado about Nothing, and one of my faviorite instances is the film Get Over it. It’s a cheesy as hell early 2000′s high school pg-13 comedy, that I loved as a teen and nos nostalgicaly love but am aware it has issues and some stitled acting as an adult where our hero joins the high school play in order to win his ex girlfriend back from the douchebag she’s seeing now and ends up falling for his best friend’s kid sister instead. They do a mid summer’ night’s dream, which is not only awesome SOMEONE thought to use that one , as the film has given me a special affection for the play.. but it’s a cheesy musical version written by the gloriously over acted director of the play played by martin short. 

My faviorite part of it is the boy band style number about Hermia. Yes really. And I didn’t even get into the fact Siquo is one of the main character’s best friends, Kristin Dunst had to reshoot a scene while making the first rami spider-man , our heroes weird parents who are sex therapists and have no real filter AND offer Coolio a threesome on their advice show, and yes the actual coolio and yes that was an actual person that existed, or best of all the douchey rival who stole our heroes girlfriend, whose not only a former boy band member whose band peformed the song love scud, but also threatens our hero with nunchucks at one point. 

Just see this movie.. i’ll hopefully talk about it some day. 

Point is this kind of plot is stock.. but it’s the good kind you can do a lot of twists and turns with as every example mentioned, even the ones using the crush thing, had some clever twist or turn. And this one is no exception as we’ll see. 

So we meet Ms. Berardo, the schools HAMMY as hell drama teacher who gives herself an entrance and is just wondrously entertaining throughout. She’s played by Grey Delise Griffin, which I could recognize immodestly and man does she bring it. Seriously bring her back. Wonderful character. So our heroine and her leading man audition and in a refreshing change of pace they do not get the lead rolls, instead a modern valley girl and a jock who writes his stuff on his arms do so instead.  But since Bernado’s a bit nuts, she decides to have the Montagues and Capulets practice separately despite tha not making a ton of sense, to drive up tension and what not. I mean isolating an actor to drive up tension is a vallid technique but even having not read Romeo and Juliet since high school, over a decade ago, I can tell you they have several scenes together and this is a logistical nightmare. However our heroine finagles her way over to swapping camps so she can talk to Benny since honestly given the whole thing was a way to get to spend more time with him, she might as well quit otherwise. It also.. isn’t a bad tactic. She wants to know him before asking him out properly, which is fair and a good way to go, and they already know each other and are friendly, and it’s something she likes doing anyway as they were both involved with a play in his first appearance and her liking theater makes sense as she’s a comedian, and while she clearly prefers standup, it’s often a natural evolution to go fromt hat to acting in comedy stuff or making your own show, so it’s not a bad idea to learn that side of the buisness too. 

So Luann FINALLY gets to talk to Benny.. after fast ball specialing mr coconuts in the way of someone trying to sit down

But we get a really cute moment as the two just.. talk like two dorky teenagers; They talk about the real mimes of la, which I want badly to be a show.. even if it’s just to find out what the Mime from Animaniacs is up to now. Where DID that guy go? Did the anvil finally kill him? These are the kinds of things that keep me up at night.. which is probably why I’m finishing this at 4 in the morning. But the two have genuine chemistry with Luann offering him her banana, phrasing, and making a pun he chuckles at. It’s adorable as all hell. 

And Bernardo notices, and since her leads have no sparks she regretfully demotes them.. though their reaction is hilariously realistic as both are just happy to have less lines and walk off. She decides to cast Luann and Benny despite being freshman which would never happen but eh this is a unvierse with a snakebird and spies trying to destroy cherries with a death laser why I do I care two seasons later if two freshman got the leads in the play. Still I love the twist: our hero wasn’t trying to get the lead to creeiply force intamacy or anything.. the two just had natural chemistry and the director noticed that and wants to use it. 

But while this should be great.. it isn’t as Luann keeps dodging actually kissing Benny when they rehearse the kiss. The reason.. is really frigging endearing. Luann simply hasn’t kissed anyone before, this will be her first.. and naturally she’s REALLY nervous about having it in front of a crowd or Benny thinking she’s a bad kisser. And I mean... while I had no personal experience at that age in kissing, most media and personal accounts detail it as awkward as fuck. But that’s the irony: she dosen’t KNOW it’s always awkward and thus is putting a ton of pressure on herself like anyone her age.

So she breaks under the pressure despite the reasurances of her Dummy/Possible Sign that she needs therapy and while she finds a way out the next Day Benny has aburbtly quit because of “chess club”.. which he’s not in. Luann finds him and talks to him about it, worried it’s her fault.. and she’s right, though Benny bowed out because she clearly wasn’t comfortable with him and didn’t want to make her kiss him when she clearly wasn’t comfortable with it. What a man what a man what a mighty good man. Luann TRIES to explain.. and then lets Mr Coconuts do it. Which usually in high school would lead to humilating rejection. instead Benny brings out his own puppet Mrs. Appleblossom. 

Just those eyes.. black and souless.. like a doll’s eyes.. because htey are a doll’s eyes. So yeah Benny also has a puppet he uses to say the things he’s too nervous to say. Which is endearing even if again , KILL IT. KILL IT. I mean i’ts like tha tone guy from victorious if the puppets were actually charming and one of them looked like it was about to play hide the soul. Mrs. Appleblossom explains that Benny is also nervous and with the air cleared and the two realizing theyw ere nervous about the same thing... the inevitible happens

So that fades into the kiss happening on stage, with Luann’s family cheering her, our heroes take a fookin bow and Coconuts and Appleblossom look on.. and talk somehow...and somehow got in the seats on their own. 

Stage Plight Final Thoughts: This episode.. is one of the series best, with great pacing, a low amount of repetition and a relatable conflict, while building up Luann’s love intrest to be a wonderful and engaging guy, and giving us a hell of a guest character and Mrs. Gerardo. This episod eis great, the chemistyr between Gambrone and Pucelli is fantastic. This one is just awesome and worth a look especially if the ship contrversy had hit you hard. It really is good. And there’s always room for benny. Until the next rainbow it’s been a pleasure. 

#the loud house #lucy loud #luann loud #benny stein #lori loud #leni loud #lola loud #lincoln loud #rusty spokes #rocky spokes #valentine's day #animation #nickelodeon

[cybertronian-cupid]

*crashes in through the window*

Alrighty folks!

Since there are "almost adults" and minors on the prowl again, here's a little reminder before our Twitter and content that will be also posted on here, becomes a thing for real;

We keep saying this because we are still a new blog, and we want to make things clear from the begining! You guys have all been wonderful and amazing, and we wanna keep it that way!

~~~

So, the short version:

This is an 18+ y/o selfship blog!

Don't wanna see porn with the muses? BLOCK #Cupids get fragged

Don't wanna see porn at all cuz you're here for the cute kind of selfshipping? BLOCK #Valveplug and #Suggestive

STILL seeing porn, even after all that? You either clicked the ReadMore by accident or your name is Jared, and in that case I will help you learn how to read first, before giving you a cookie and sending you on your merry way! If you come back a second time AND DECIDE YOU WANNA BITCH ABOUT CLEARLY TAGGED CONTENT, Mila will be here to help you, as she is the blog bouncer :3

[Gregoria and her longass explanation BELOW THE READMORE!]

Love you guys! 🖤💜🖤~🏩

~~~

HI! I am a BIG LOVER of saying things "just in case" and general warnings regarding activity and such. SO, HERE WE GO!

This is an ADULT shipping blog. With SELF INSERTS and Anons and humans/humanoids being the main focus!

Yes, that would mean if you don't block certain tags! You're gonna see THE MUNS (Gregoria:ME! and Mila:MY DARLING!) GETTING SPIKED! SPIKING! SPIKES! VALVES! FRAGGING! PLUGS! JACKS! CABLES! WIRING! INSERT WHATEVER OTHER FANDOM WORD COULD BE USED!!!

(For anyone new to the fandom: smut and FUCKING with these giant metal robots! Or their holoforms! Humanformers? Mass displaced robots? To keep it short: fucking=fragging)

For the sake of anyone who doesn't wanna see self indulgent visual art like that, for anyone who is sex repulsed, or it just isn't their cup of tea... HEY! YOU'RE STILL FUCKING VALID AND AWESOME!

HERE ARE THE TAGS TO BLOCK IT FOR WHATEVER REASON YOU HAVE!

(Untagged porn is the last thing anyone wants to see on their dash... Which is also why there are so many WARNINGSSSSSS on this blog WHEN THERE SHOULD BE MORE SOFTNESS AND PORNNNNN THAT WAITS TO BE POSTED! Because while we trust you wonderful people, saying stuff beforehand will save us all headaches)

#Cupids get fragged: Muses fragging someone or getting fragged by someone

#Valveplug: anything you would not want your mother to see (Unless your mother is also a robot fucker and/or if she is only your mother in the bedroom... In that case, you still know best what your mommy wants to see)

#Suggestive: Someone might just be having a snack *proceeds to hold and handle the bananas and ice creams and etc in that way* Just a hint, not necesarily dirty... Yet >8}

As with any of our Valveplug posts, the art will be under a Read More/Keep Reading aka just a click away! There will be a short summary of what you can expect if y͟o͟u͟ click on that button!

*leans in*

We are adults, yes? We are all capable of understanding free will and what clicking a thing means, YES?

GOOD!

*leans back*

Neither me nor Mila are all knowing, nor do we want to be!

But you guys CAN ALWAYS TELL US

"Hey! Could you use this tag?" or

"Hey guys, this should be tagged X" or any variation, help is appreciated.

THIS BLOG IS MEANT FOR OUR FUN!

WE WANT TO SHARE OUR FUN WITH YOU FOLKS! If we make a mistake it's because WE AIN'T PRIMUS!

These longass posts I put out are HERE CUZ I AIN'T RATCHET! My enjoyment does not come from nagging you guys left and right! NEITHER DOES MILA! Neither does Ratchet probs, but! Not the point!

We are also not gonna beat around the bush.

So let me say it loud and clear!

THIS is A SELFSHIPPING BLOG!

THIS, to us, INCLUDES THE HORNY VISUALS! (Yea, yea, I am personaly also a slut for cuddling by the fire and drinking the beverage of your choice, but hey. Sometimes you want to frag a sentient dino or a bucket or an airplane or a truck or a motorcyle or *vague motion illustrating a vehicle*... You know?)

YOU DON'T WANNA SEE IT?! we respect your decision, there are tags in place for you to block if you no likey (scroll back on top of this post), hopefuly you can stay and enjoy the softness!

But if you're leaving now, thank you for the wonderful time we've had, have some cookies for your troubles, tataaa, enjoy a different blog, AND BE KIND AND CONSIDERATE TO THE FELLOW ARTISTS, THANK YOUUUUU!

(I ain't no ones mommy, but bare minimum decency is a thing that seems to be lacking in fandoms these days ^w^)

*deep breath*

Alrighty~

Now that THIS is all nice and addressed and cleared up! It's time for me and my darling to tackle those requests of yours~

UNTIL NEXT TIME YOU WONDERFUL PEOPLE! TAKE SOME COOKIES FOR MAKING IT THIS FAR!

🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪

*jumps back from whence I came*

Lots of love,

~Gregoria🏩

#cupids whisper #gregoria whispers #tagging things #Valveplug #Just in case anyone wants to start causing a ruckus in the future. NONE OF THAT HERE THANK YOU MY GOOD SIR/MAAM/FELLOW BEING!

[panharmonium]

@merlinobsessionist you understand me on a spiritual level

[putting the rest of this under a cut because it just ended up being me grumping at length about fandom trends - which, yes, i am well-aware is a silly endeavour in all cases, but sometimes you just gotta have your little grump regardless, you know, for health reasons. X)  and in this particular case the grumping is probably relevant/entertaining only to myself, and you, and one or two other people here, so, tucking it away to spare everyone’s dash :) ]

the other day i was exploring the mostly abandoned wasteland that is the merlin fandom on livejournal (since that’s my original fandom home and obviously i missed out on being involved in that particular niche of lj when merlin was active, so i was feeling nostalgic and kinda curious as to it had looked like) - i stumbled over a merlin fic-finders comm and looked up my boy william just for kicks, and surprisingly, a couple of the old requests sounded like maybe i WAS involved in the merlin fandom on livejournal back then and i just don’t remember it

i think i wrote this in a past life

this is an eleven year-old comment in a mostly defunct fandom community but i felt it in my BONES

oh, my dear commenter from 8 years ago, i WISH  XD

it made me laugh, and then it made me grumpy, because obviously there were very few suggestions offered in response to these asks - the fics just don’t exist, not in any numbers.

and like, the thing is, i don’t particularly care about the shipping side of things for the most part; i always lean towards gen and that’s mostly been it, for me; that’s always been my MO in every fandom i’ve ever participated in, but - look.  if i have to witness (*checks ao3*) 23,830 (twenty four thousand. twenty four THOUSAND!!!!) instances of merlin getting together with arthur hecking pendragon, over and over and over again, in every AU configuration under the sun, then you had better believe i am ready and willing to plead the case of the only person in the merlin-verse who did not think arthur pendragon deserved merlin’s entire life.  

and of course, there’s nothing inherently wrong with arthur and merlin as an item, obviously (i mean, i can name a few things about it that don’t appeal to me personally, but that is not the same thing as a value judgment) and everybody should have fun with their own ships, always - but for me, personally, there is just...enough of that out there.  i have seen Enough.  it’s hard for me to even determine where the rest of the fandom is, under the ever-present spread of merlin/arthur content; a picture of merlin/arthur should literally be next to the dictionary entry for steamroller.

and of course, i knew it would be like this from the beginning, and i know complaining about the ubiquitousness of a particular ship in fandom is utterly silly, in the end, because it’s not like there’s anything wrong with something being ubiquitous - the whole point of fandom is to make what you love, and if that’s what everybody loves, well, hey, that’s just how it is!  that’s what people should be making - the stuff they love!  that’s what fandom is here for!  i only mutter to myself in the bubble of my own blog because the ubiquitousness makes it almost impossible for me to find what *i* love, because i don’t want to read about arthur/merlin in the first place, no matter who else appears in the fic, and also because my fave minor character, while he gets a pretty good amount of fannish screentime for someone who showed up in one episode, also suffers from the curse known as “virtually everything he features in is actually about merlin and arthur getting it on”

like - by the numbers, when you exclude merlin/arthur from will’s character tag, will retains less than 20% of his fics, some of which are already like...you know, he’s dead, or just mentioned, et cetera.  

and his poor ship tag...he and merlin have 136 fics in their tag, and at first you wanna look at that and be like - ‘hey, not bad, pal, that’s p. good for a rarepair!’  but in actuality, less than 20 of those fics are actually about him and merlin.  like...12% of his own ship tag actually belongs to him, and the rest is him being used as a plot device to get arthur and merlin together.

and i am sure that a lot of other side characters probably suffer from this, too, given the general fic distribution in this fandom, though the only person i’ve looked at for comparison purposes is freya, who is a (mostly) one-ep character like will.  she, despite that, doesn’t appear to get hit quite as hard - she seems to keep more of her fic for herself, which is nice (when i exclude merlin/arthur from the freya/merlin search, freya still retains about 65% of her fics, as opposed to will’s sad little 12%).  i’m glad for her, though - she of all people does not need to be losing fic to arthur; she has suffered enough. 

to put things in perspective, though - merlin and uther have more fics in their ship tag that earnestly focus on the tagged....hnhhmgnhn i can’t say it...relationship than merlin and will do - even filtering out every instance of dubcon/noncon.  

(and yes, i did in fact want to die when i had to actually click the merlin/uther tag on ao3 in order to check that factoid, thanks for asking.)

so, that said - i don’t generally read canon-era fic anyway, when i’m actively writing for a fandom, but since the merlin fandom sometimes feels like it consists solely of modern AU’s anyway, all i am trying to say is that it would be nice if i could pick up an AU including a character i enjoy without seeing him constantly reduced to:

merlin’s loser ex

merlin’s abusive ex (w h at)

merlin’s ex who’s kinda sorta tolerable-ish, maybe, if you squint, but just ultimately Not Right for merlin - holding merlin back, or being too overbearing, or too pushy, or Just Not Enough - or being someone who merlin stays with only bc he’s familiar and merlin’s settling for something safe and unrisky and stagnantly unfulfilling

the dude who merlin cheats on to be with arthur

the dude who cheats on merlin, bc the fic needed a reason to break up merlin and will so that white-knight!arthur could swoop in (cue me shouting ‘IN WHAT UNIVERSE DO YOU THINK WILL WOULD EVER - ’)

the dude merlin “makes mistakes with” when things with arthur aren’t going well

the friend-with-benefits who’s apparently chill with a casual arrangement, thus keeping himself conveniently out of the way of the oncoming merlin/arthur train

the friend-with-benefits who’s secretly NOT chill with a casual arrangement and who’s pining for merlin, except we all know that ain’t ever going anywhere because arthur exists, and in the meantime merlin only ever gets together with will to try and forget his problems

the friend-with-no-benefits who’s still pining for merlin (which situation, i might add, would be read completely differently if it were arthur in will’s shoes, because if that were the case then the audience would 100% be rooting for him)

the “best friend” whose only purpose in fic is to provide space for conversations/debriefs about merlin’s relationship/pre-relationship with arthur (like - i’m sorry, but there desperately needs to be some type of bechdel-esque test for will; e.g. do will and merlin have a conversation about something other than arthur pendragon?  if yes, u win, u may pass go, collect 20 dollars, congratulations)

the friend whose dislike of arthur always, ALWAYS ends up being framed as a mistake.  as will’s stubborn unwillingness to give arthur a chance, until at last will sees the light and succumbs to the irresistible beauty of merlin and arthur’s eternal love. -_-  there is vanishingly rare acknowledgement in fic of the fact that in the canon universe, all of the criticisms will makes about merlin and arthur’s relationship are not only accurate, but made in merlin’s best interests (and also, ultimately, proven right, by the end of the show - merlin tanks his whole damn life for a series of empty promises prophesying arthur pendragon’s future potential, and he gets NOTHING for his devotion.  merlin is more alone at the end of the show than he was at the beginning, when his only dream was to be loved and accepted by more than the two people who’d comprised his entire life up until that point.  and he spends at least half a decade in between the show’s hopeful beginning and its miserable end being told that he’s evil by the very person for whom he is expected to sacrifice his future.  

so what, exactly, makes will so wrong to be wary?  who among us wouldn’t be angry if we saw somebody we loved being forced to sacrifice themselves on an unforgiving altar like this?  

i don’t know the answer.  i’m not sure what it is that earns will his spot on the “destined to be shafted for arthur pendragon” list.  i don’t know if it’s an unconscious backlash to will’s refusal to hop on the arthur/merlin train, or if it’s just a superficial understanding/lack of genuine interest in his character, which, in that case, sure, i’ll give people that one, in all fairness; not everyone has spent a year picking his character apart (though i still don’t think it justifies tossing him in there just because the fic needs a random insert who can be positioned as inferior to arthur’s gloriousness).  either way, the end result is that we usually end up seeing a will who has very little in common with his source material, or who needs to ultimately step aside to make way for arthur - arthur, who never displays the same level of care toward merlin in canon that merlin shows toward him, and who actively oppresses merlin’s people for the entire duration of their relationship.  

like...it’s all just fic, obviously, and we can make characters as OOC as we want; have fun; go wild.  but at the same time, it’s impossible for me not to balk at how arthur in some of this fic is just - utterly unrecognizable.  in comparison with fic!will, arthur is the most Solicitous, Gentle, Understanding, Deeply Concerned, Invested-In-Merlin’s-Welfare-and-Inner-Thoughts creature you ever did see, and I’m just over here like - it is not like that!  it is NOT LIKE THAT!  IT HAS LITERALLY NEVER BEEN LIKE THAT.  arthur pendragon in fic sometimes interacts with merlin like - he tilts his head and listens like a therapist and affirms absolutely everything merlin says and tells him ‘gosh, i understand. tell me more. how can i help you’ - he goes about his day thinking about merlin and putting merlin first and i just - i literally have never seen this person before in my life.  who is this man?  who is this unbelievably attentive paragon of caring?  i’ve never met him before.

the entire running problem with merlin and arthur’s friendship in canon is that arthur, while he absolutely does care about merlin, tends to take merlin for granted.  merlin is just another feature of arthur’s landscape, until something dramatic happens and arthur has a little scare and saves merlin’s life, and then things go back to the way they were.  arthur doesn’t See merlin the way he should, not in the ordinary moments.  merlin goes home and spends his evenings thinking about arthur’s life; he ties himself in knots trying to help arthur develop as a person and to keep arthur safe and happy, but arthur just goes home and eats supper with his wife.  arthur does not go home and spend his nights agonizing over how he can improve merlin’s life.  he never once thinks, ‘my purpose on this earth is to serve and support my friend merlin.’  he never feels like he’s supposed to be half of some two-sided coin.  i know people like to give arthur this quality in their fic - and that’s totally fine, of course, it’s fic, have as much fun as you want - but in canon, that is just not something arthur pendragon does.  it’s not who he is shown to be.  

and yet almost every time when i go to explore fandom, i find that the person who does put merlin first in canon is perpetually elbowed aside for this extremely generous interpretation of everyone’s favorite prince.  

and i just...i always try to find the good bits in everything, and i am sometimes willing to overlook a ship i don’t personally enjoy if there’s something else about the piece that i think is great, but there’s only so many times i can read the sentence “merlin had never felt like this with anyone, not even will” in fics where merlin and will are supposed to have been dating or even married/engaged, or “will was merlin’s best friend, but he just didn’t understand” (not like arthur, of course, who merlin literally just met a week ago), or “will was great, but there was only so much of him merlin could stand in one sitting/will was great, but he was best enjoyed in small doses.”  there’s only so many times i can read a hundred different variations of that before i start to get real grumpy.  and that’s not even touching the fics where will’s portrayed less favorably than that, even.  

so, you know.  i feel grumbly about it sometimes, how this particular character is trapped in a perpetual net of always being less-than, when one of the nicest parts of fandom for me is that every character/ship can have an infinitude of possibilities, even the ones i personally think are unbelievably bizarre (which category merlin and will do not even fall into, like - it’s not an incredible leap.  merlin/mordred is a leap, okay; mordred is like seventeen years old!  leon/morgana is a leap - how on earth did that become so popular??? - but will and merlin?  that’s not a leap.)

what is it about will that makes him so tempting to trample over?  will’s only sin in canon was to look at arthur pendragon and pronounce himself utterly unimpressed.  his only crime was to tell merlin ‘this dude isn��t good for you,’ about which fact he was CORRECT, by the way - he is the first person who ever chooses to care about merlin, the first person merlin ever chooses to trust, the first friend who loves real!merlin without needing to be coaxed and convinced and taught that it’s okay.  he is the only one who ever tells merlin ‘you deserve better than this mess,’ the only one for whom merlin has always been priority number one and in whose eyes arthur isn’t even on the map.  merlin’s friendship with will (and lancelot, afterwards) is the healthiest one merlin ever gets to experience, and i wish more fannish material acknowledged it as such, as opposed to using will to set up merlin and arthur’s epic romance.  

all of this, i suppose, is just a very long way of saying that now that i am no longer avoiding spoilers and have actually started testing the waters of the wider fandom, i have come to the obstinate, utterly inflexible conclusion that will deserves his own collection of happy endings, and i don’t care if i have to write them myself.  i’ve already got the gen angle covered.  and even though i’ve never written ship!fic in my life, the fact of the matter is that spite can be a hell of a motivator, and i will bite the bullet and learn how to do it if i have to.  if people can really be out here tagging their merlin/uther fics as “schmoop” (YES. REALLY.) then by GOD, i swear, there are no excuses - this fandom can accommodate literally anything; there’s no reason it can’t accommodate stories where will wins.  let this kid have his good ending.  arthur pendragon can fall in love with merlin 23,830 times despite his and merlin’s ship flying in the face of canon, and that means will deserves his own tiny handful of stories to be actually about him, without his and merlin’s relationship being used solely as a stepping stone on the way to merlin and arthur’s 23,831st triumph.

i am just saying - if uther pendragon can fall in love with merlin and have it tagged as ‘fluff,’ then for the love of all that is good, we can give will his moment.  let will enjoy the respect he should have earned from us when he died saving both merlin and arthur’s lives.  let will be a person in his own right, instead of a plot device sacrificed to the (in)glorious altar of merthur.  let will have an inner life of his own.  let will have a best friend who doesn’t treat him like an accessory to The Greatest Love Story Ever Told.  let will himself live out The Greatest Love Story Ever Told, for once.  let will get his guy.  i may tend to focus on friendship in my own work, but there are a lot of universes out there, and when it comes to someone who has always been so alone, and so singularly focused on merlin’s wellbeing, i’m not entirely sure if friendship even feels anything different to “in love” for will at all, in at least some of these places.

let will have his happy tags.  he’s been on his own for so much of his life - let him have his simple ‘friendship’, his ‘platonic love,’ his ‘found family.’  let him have his lovestruck ‘pining,’ ‘friends-to-lovers,’ ‘angst with a happy ending,’ too, and let him keep those tags for himself.  let characters who aren’t arthur pendragon have their love stories.

i may not care much for shipping, and i would rather read gen any day of the week, but let me tell you right now, i would rather write will and merlin settling down in a haze of domestic bliss 23,830 times before i would ever want to watch merlin ditch him yet again for a dude who never matched merlin’s level of caring and investment in the canon ‘verse.

#the once and future slowburn #no kings no masters #fandom #thank you for coming to the extended version of my ted talk #ultimately i know it's silly to be so invested #in something this small #and i constantly struggle with feeling...bizarrely self-conscious about like - even writing things like this because #it's so inconsequential and then i feel silly for being so interested #and using so many words for such a little thing #you know like when you're young and you get embarrassed about being so passionate about some niche interest #i feel like someone is looking at me and being like 'BOY THAT GIRL IS STUPID' #(why you ask???) #(i don't know; it's ridiculous!) #but then there's like another voice in my head yelling 'THAT IS LITERALLY WHAT FANDOM IS FOR' #'fanatic domain' #you're SUPPOSED to be fanatically obsessed about something; that is literally the point #people devote whole blogs to their tiny niche interests and their favorite pairings and they post incessantly about one thing #and i never think that's weird #that's just fandom #so i just have to like - chill out about myself lol #i am allowed to make innumerable posts about something only i care about #and i am allowed to be as passionate about tiny niche things as i want #that is literally the purpose of fandom and i just have to keep reminding myself of that #i have no trouble remembering it when it comes to other people's interests #but i always get self-conscious about my own #ANYWAY I'M WORKING ON IT #but in the meantime i'm having fun #which is the entire point of being a fan so #all is well #:D

[celticheartedfangirl]

My OUAT Rewatch -- S4E22 and 23 -- Operation Mongoose, Parts 1 & 2

Link to Rewatch Review and Ranking archive

Bobby looks about as done with this season as I am.  I know Michael Socha was done with it -- literally -- but we’ll get to that later.

This is gonna be long.  So have a seat, pour yourself a drink or seven, and get ready.  I’m not holding back . . . . . . 

First of all, I debated about whether I should review this as one or two episodes.  I decided to go with one, and will do this going forward with any episodes that have the same title and are part 1,2, 8 million, whatever.  Trust me, at times it SEEMED like 8 million.

First thing I want to address is a bunch of fandom wank nonsense that came out of this episode -- namely the idea that RUMPLE wrote the story.  Let me make this perfectly clear:

Rumple DID NOT WRITE THIS STORY.  Isaac did.  Rumple told him what HE, personally, wanted.  Isaac took it from there.  Rumple didn’t write Isaac as a famous douchebag author, and he sure as hell wouldn’t have given fucking ZELENA a wedding in the story, he’d have killed her off in a painful but well-deserved death.  Ditto Hook.  So if you still actually think Rumple wrote this story, my recommendation to you is that you back out of this post now.  And you should probably stay off my blog in general.  Because frankly, I think you are wrong and stupid and we are not compatible in any way.  Got it?

Looking at YOU, some RUMBELLE FANS who actually did this shit:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118193570842/i-am-stunned-to-see-some-rumbelle-fans-bitching

Okay, so there’s THAT.  Next . . . 

So this episode was A&E’s attempt at META.  And frankly, they SUCK at it.  It didn’t come off as funny, it came off as making fun of the fans.  No spoilers, ha ha ha .  . . . . . . for those not in the know, back when the show was airing, Adam’s go to answer to fans on Twitter was #nospoilers.  So the whole Isaac so thing was basically a dig at the FANS.  

So there’s THAT.

The entertainment media was shitting all over Rumbelle before the finale, which pissed me off enough to make this post:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118484723732/when-and-why-exactly-did-rumbelle-become-the

And this comment:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118467157702/ouat-finale-your-burning-relationship-questions

And then there’s THIS:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118658755342/omg-ae-dig-the-knife-in-why-dont-you

Yes, in case you weren’t clear, dead is DEAD (we’ll revisit this thought in S5), Neal ain’t coming back, suck on it all of you who don’t like that!  Love, Adam and Eddy.  

Also, in other bullshit news, regarding who taught Henry to sail a ship:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118655893997/henry-no-your-father-taught-you-that

And THIS:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/118660507567/what-the-fuck-they-left-rumple-on-the-floor-but

Revisiting May 2015 me is making current me stabby.  And I haven’t even mentioned the entire town of dumbasses herp-derping around and partying at Granny’s while Rumple is dying and could be a meat suit for the ultimate evil of all evils any second now.  Morons.  

Let’s talk about the stuff I DID enjoy . . . . 

Evil Snow was a riot!  

Bandit!Regina was fantastic.  

And this guy:

Gotta love Knight!Rumple!  

Also, I will admit . . . . . Hook was more useful in useless mode in the AU than he’s ever been in Hook mode outside of the AU.  Does that make sense?  

So there’s all of that.  Overall this 2-part thing was part good stuff, mostly hot mess, and a lot of middle fingers waved to the fans from the writers.  But tally comes later.  NOW is the time to address the Michael Socha issue:

Right about now, dearie.  Will Scarlett is gone.  You will never see him or hear about him again.

(Side note:  Made an error in my last review.  I honestly did not remember AT ALL that we saw Lily again in this episode, both in person form or in dragon form.  Which tells you how much of an impression that made on me.  Anyhoo, my bad.  I goofed.  NOW she’s gone for good.)

So what was the deal with Will Scarlett anyway?  

Well . . . . nobody knows.  We’ll probably NEVER know.  You see, Will Scarlett was one of the breakout characters from the spinoff Once Upon a Time in Wonderland, and when that got canceled, someone -- really not sure who -- thought it’d be an awesome idea to plunk him onto OUAT.  

There were many schools of thought on this, the primary one being that ABC wanted him for something and wanted to keep him on contract.  That was 2014.  I’m typing this in 2020, and there’s still no Michael Socha show on ABC.  So that was a load of horse shit -- or else Socha told ABC to fuck off and hightailed it back to England.  My money is on the latter.  

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/115784240042/honest-question-why-did-they-bring-will-onto

But the issue isn’t even that they didn’t do fuck-all with Socha -- it’s the LIES that these assholes (they being A&E) told.  So here’s where my receipts come in.  You ready?  Got your popcorn?

First of all there’s this lovely article -- Will is mentioned by all of it is just glorious in general:

https://oncecrazy.tumblr.com/post/118843079631/the-26-things-the-castwriters-promised-would

What is so HIGHlarious about all of this is that almost all of the articles that existed about the whole Will Scarlett thing -- no longer EXIST!

The highlight is Zap2it -- which is a now defunct fan site that A&E liked to go prattle to.  

So Frick and Frack promised us we’d find out how Belle & Will got together.  I have this:

https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/424464333605771793/#

And I have this:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/113163777872/once-upon-a-time-belle-and-the-knave-are-a-new

I also have a bunch of people I KNOW can confirm they saw this interview full of bullshit before it got erased.  Please show yourselves!  

But fear not -- I have an ACTUAL receipt from Mr. Socha himself:

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/140658788782/apparently-michael-socha-got-screwed-over-by-ouat

https://celticheartedfangirl.tumblr.com/post/140624375357/hes-a-good-bloke-i-saw-him-at-the-comic-con

I’m grateful someone had the idea to type it out, because sadly the link to that article was DELETED, which makes me think Socha got in trouble for that interview.  Because shortly after that, a more watered down interview with him was posted in its place and THAT is still up:

https://www.digitalspy.com/tv/ustv/a785951/michael-socha-confirms-once-upon-a-time-exit/

Interesting, no?

Whatever the case -- Socha got royally fucked over by OUAT, for no good reason.  His character was a plot device.  What a waste and what an insult to the man who just wanted to work.  Fuck these assholes.  

So anyhow, there are the receipts, and we are now at the end of the clusterfuck that was Season 4.  

Speaking of clusterfucks . . . . onward to Season 5.  

Lord, give me strength . . . . . 

Points tally:

40 points to start

10 points for Rumbelle kiss

10 points for Rumbelle hug

5 points for Swan Queen

3 points for Papafire, at least it got mentioned

5 points for Belle in character

5 points for Rumple in character

5 points deducted for Hook

5 points deducted for Zelena

I really can’t justify adding or deducting anything bonus.  Just get me out of this season, please and thank you.

Total points:  68

Follow #celtichearted OUAT ranking tag for more to come!

#celtichearted ouat ranking #operation mongoose #anti hook #anti zelena #anti ouat writers #ouat criticism

[thestuckylibrary]

Group Ask 133

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Please send us an ask stating which group ask and which person you are replying to. Thank you so much in advance!

kenisle said:

hi sorry to bother you. i’m looking for a fic (or fics, if there happen to be more than one) where steve can’t go in the water or swim because he flashes back to being in the ice. he and bucky live at avengers tower with the other avengers, who don’t notice. i tried looking under your ptsd tag, but i didn’t see it. thank you — all the best x

bennettmp339 and miraishu sent in drowning in the memories by itsmylifekay (oneshot | 4,752 | not rated)

Anon 1 said:

So once upon a time, I read a fic (or a series of interconnected fics) in which Bucky is an Avenger and is in a relationship with Steve. What sets this particular fic/series apart is that they fight some aliens and one of them lays eggs in Bucky's (metal!) arm, leading to a scene in a kitchen in which either Bucky or Tony burns the larva out with a blowtorch. Those are literally the only things I remember about it. (I recently reread The Murder Ballads and thought it was the one, but it isn't.)

insomnia1999 and Anon sent in We’re All Stupid When We’re Hurting by Taste_is_Sweet (oneshot | 7,983 | T)

Anon 2 said:

Hiiii! I was wondering if you guys could help me find a fic a was reading some time ago but lost. I remember Steve and Natasha were comic book artists and talked through Skype, Bucky moved into his building. Steve goes to conventions and if I recall correctly, he takes Bucky to one. I’m not really sure but Bucky went to therapy (or a vet meeting). I think Sam was Steve’s manager or boss, omg it’s a mess hahaha but if you could find it that would be dope. Thank you guys!!

mille-baci, bennettmp339, therandomravenclw, getstucky and Anon sent in To Be Vulnerable Is Needed Most Of All by perfect_plan (complete | 118,363 | M)

ship-on-sight said:

Hi! Amazing blog! Looking for a fic I read a while ago on ao3. It involved Bucky finding it hard to make decisions so he would just do whatever Steve wanted. Steve didn’t like this and decides to give him one choice to make every day and basically forces him to do it. Sam finds out and freaks but then understands. Sorry if it’s too vague, but I’d appreciate your help!!

Anon sent in By Any Other Name* by justanotherStonyfan (oneshot | 8,294 | E) *HTP, past rape/noncon

Anon 3 said:

I’ve been looking for a fic where Bucky’s internal thought process is written kinda like MS-DOS commands with two or three distinct voices that all have their own functions. At some point he tells Steve about it when one of the command voices stops responding (and it’s not Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail). I’m losing my mind, please help??

Anon sent in Ain’t No Grave (Can Keep My Body Down)* by spitandvinegar  (restricted, complete | 107,076 | M) *past rape/noncon, heed the tags

yetanotherobsessivereader sent in Original Programming* by zetsubonna (oneshot | 3,478 | E) *polyamory

Anon 4 said:

Good afternoon listen I’ve been desperately searching for an alternate school or uni au where buckys list his arm and works at the library or something and steve has been crushing on him since forever but doesn’t know what to do bc bucky is broody and gloomy all the time but at the end they’re of course together so does anything pop up??

miraishu sent in I See You by IsabellaJack (complete | 7,310 | T)

Anon 5 said:

Hi! I lost the name of this fic that I LOVED. It’s on ao3 (I’m pretty sure). It’s where Steve & Bucky are in the training room of the mansion and it floods. Steve freaks out cuz ptsd and bucks is worrying and trying to comfort him. If u could find it that would be AMAZING!!

Anon 6 said:

hey i went through ur soulmate tag but couldn't find this fic — its where bucky is steve's soulmate but steve isn't his and there's a scene when bucky goes missing on a mission, nat(?) brings in steve to find him bc steve can feel where bucky is bc he is his soulmate but then the towards the end of the fic, bucky realises steve IS soulmate. i read this a long time ago and i would love to read it again. pls help me out, thanks ❤.

Anon, airybmore, dolphinqueen10, teenagemutantninjamushroom, yetanotherobsessivereader and lostthebucky sent in True North by leveragehunters (Monkeygreen) (oneshot | 6,693 | T)

Anon 7 said:

Oh man I'm so desperate for this fic. Steve was adopted by Sarah on accident but she loved him right away and let him stay. He punched Bucky cuz he thought he was harrassing Nat but he wasn't. It all takes place in a little farm town and I think it's a high school AU? thanks :)

Anon 8 said:

Hello! Can you help me find the fic where Steve wakes up and Bucky doesn’t exist? Steve is the only one who can remember him because someone went back on time to kill the winter soldier? And then Steve gets a video from himself telling him hi to get bucky back? Thank you!!

abarbaricyalp, yetanotherobsessivereader and therandomravenclw sent in A Memory Like a Haunting by cobaltmoony, DarkCaustic (complete | 28,698 | E)

Anon 9 said:

Does anyone know a fic where Steve has two were forms? One is a huge dog and one is a tiny one? And one scene is pepper or someone picking him up etc cause if he jumps he’ll see under her dress or something like that?

Anon 10 said:

heyy i'm looking for an abo fic, modern setting. all i know is that bucky & steve were childhood friends, they were separated and bucky eventually became a prostitute (he has a few abortions) and reunites with steve who's about to be deployed. he ends up pregnant but they get news that steve is dead or smth and goes to the funeral with their kid. i can't for the life of me find it, sorry this is kinda long, thanks :)

awolfnamedaliac sent in missing in action; presumed dead* by moonythejedi394 (complete | 39,819 | T) */others

Anon 11 said:

Do you know that one fic where a bird hits the window and Bucky doesn’t believe Steve is Steve and he thinks he’s just another handler

Anon, airybmore, yetanotherobsessivereader and orchidsrule sent in A History of Birds by OddityBoddity (oneshot | 2,580 | G)

miraishu sent in This is the Ghost Story by Taste_is_Sweet (complete | 45,081 | T)

Anon 12 said:

I’ve been looking for a fic for a while it’s set in the 50’s I think and Bucky comes into town to live with his aunt and Steve lives with his mom and they fall in love like secretly and at the end I think they’re running to Canada or something I just can’t find it in the tags please help!

Anon and mille-baci sent in The Heart Wants* by perfect_plan (complete | 21,079 | M ) *period-typical homophobia

Anon 13 said:

Do you know a fic where Steve gets cursed/potioned/etc and develops the mentality of a dog or puppy? It was crack/humor but also mutual pining and very cute. I remember Steve describing everything as his favorite.

Anon sent in i hear that your old flame is a pure breed (the stand up and walk out on me remix) by lanyon (oneshot | 1,500 | G)

miraishu sent in Fill Your Heart Without Trying* by Kellyscams (complete | 38,580 | E) */others

#group asks

[radiantbeams]

can i just !!!!???? for a minute bc

so im a type 1 diabetic for those of you who don’t know which may be a lot bc I just realized I never really talk abt myself on my blog anymore but moving on, as a diabetic I have a lot of medical supplies that I need to use in order to stay alive

and when I came down to my parent’s place I didn’t think I’d be here for two whole fucking months so I didn’t bring enough of those necessary medical supplies to last me this long and i called the company i get it from and was like 

‘listen im not going to go back to my apartment to go get them i live in new york city and if you have like been a human being and awake at some point with in the last 5 days you’ll understand why im not going there’

but then they’re like ‘well your insurance says you don’t need any more supplies until next week so call back on monday’ and ummm that ain’t gonna work out sis bc even if they can ship something out to me next week there’s no way in hell w all these delays that it’s going to get to me for another two weeks after that and you know what that means?

IT MEANS that im going to be without supplies for a minimum of 5 days :) and uhhhhh how should i put this... I WILL DIE in about 4 days without this shit so :) do the math on that one sweaty :) thanks for all the help :) talk to you again on monday :)

[I won’t actually die bc I have friends and other connections who may be able to get me supplies under the table but lol also that’s illegal and im definitely not doing that bc that’s illegal haha big shoutout fbi agent who’s watching me through my webcam i am an upstanding law abiding citizen]

#char talks #like ive got work arounds but also #ive learned to NEVER trust anyone or anything having to do with the healthcare industry #so that's got me stressed just a smidge haha #t1d tag #t1diabetic

[thiswasinevitableid]

indruck - complaining to bartender and going on a date

Full Prompt: “you’ve been complaining to me about your relationship woes for the last few months and decide that we should go on a date so I can tell you everything you do wrong (spoiler: it’s the best date I’ve ever been on)“

There’s a thunk on the wooden bar behind Indrid. Indrid knows who it is by the groan of frustration.

“Rough day, Duck?”

“Day was fine. Last night sucked.”

“Your date didn’t go well, I take it?” Indrid turns and slides Duck a beer, the same one he orders every night he’s here.

“When does it ever? God, ‘Drid, that makes ten bad dates in a month. And fifteen the month before that.”

“Any sense what killed this one?” He cleans glasses as he listens (Duck is only one of four people in the bar, he can spare some time to listen to his favorite regular).

“Dunno. Maybe I talked about trees too much? Or maybe the saw the trans flag pin on my jacket? Fuck it, maybe it’s just me. Wish I knew what I was doin’ wrong.”

Indrid hums thoughtfully, because he can’t think of anything to say. Duck is easy to talk to, funny, decent. The soft parts of his body make him look like he’d be excellent to cuddle, and the muscles in his arms suggest the right amount of strength to pin Indrid to a bed.

Indrid has thought about that. More than once. But he has a strict rule about flirting with clients at work. Besides, if Duck was interested in him that way, he would have said so by now in order to try and avoid another doomed date.

“Maybe you could get some feedback, perhaps from a dating advice blog or something. That way you could know if there’s something to do differently.”

“Yeah, feedback.” Duck sips his beer, then slams his hand on the bar excitedly, “Drid, you’re a fuckin’ genius!”

“Oh?”

“You should come with me on test date! Y’know, so you can see what I’m doin’ and tell me how I can improve. You got good taste, you’ll know if I’m fuckin’ somethin up.”

Indrid arches an eyebrow and the “taste” comment; he’s wearing a white tank top and jeans and his hair has been charitably called a rats-nest.

“C’mon, help a fella out?” Duck looks at him hopefully and he cannot say no to those mismatched puppy-dog eyes.

“I’d be happy to help. I’m free Friday, Jake picked up some of my shifts to make some extra money. My friend Barclay owns the Chicago Diner two blocks down, we should go there.”

“Ain’t that the place that’s all vegan stuff?”

“Vegan and also some of the best food in the city. And it’s got the best drinks in town.”

“Alright, I’m trustin’ you to not lead me astray.”

“I shall do my best.” Indrid grins, “would you like to meet there, here, somewhere else?”

“D’you live nearby?”

“About eight blocks from the diner. Why?”

Duck looks down, mumbles something.

“I didn’t quite catch that.”

“I’d like to, uh, to pick you up. Try to do that with dates who don’t live way out in the fuckin’ burbs.”

“I forget you’re a well-mannered southern boy sometimes.” He teases, stops when he notices Duck starting to blush, “and yes, I’d be more than happy to meet at my place and walk.”

“Great” Duck sighs with relief, “where and when time am I meetin’ you?”

——————————————

Indrid checks his reflection in the bathroom mirror; he doesn’t look half-bad, hair somewhat combed and and actual t-shirt in place of his usual tank-top. He pulls on his long black sweater, the one he looks best in. And then bundles himself in two more jackets and a scarf because of course it’s snowing in March.

He steps out of the entry hallway just as Duck approaches the front door. He’s in a puffy down jacket, hat pulled over his ears and the crooked smile he gives Indrid is the best thing he’s seen all day.

He offers Indrid his arm, “Shall we?”

They don’t talk much on the way to the diner, the roar of traffic and the desire to not let cold air down their lungs making conversation tricky. Once inside, the server leads them to farthest booth, the air warm and smelling of oil and spice, and they can finally unbundle themselves. Indrid orders spiked hot cocoa, and Duck has his usual beer.

“So, how was wo- what are you doing?” Indrid cocks his head as Duck takes a small notebook and a pen from the breast pocket of his shirt.

“Takin notes. That way if I do somethin’ wrong or that you think is hurtin’ my chances of a second date, I can write it down rather than tryin to remember it all later.”

“Hmm, clever, but why don’t you let me take the notes, that way you can focus on acting like this is a normal date.”

“Good call.” Duck slides the pen and paper over. They stare at each other for a beat.

“So, uh, you go any plans for the weekend?”

“Work, mostly. I thought about going to the park to draw, but not with this weather. Goodness I hate the cold.”

“Shit, how’d you end up here then?”

“It’s just where I landed, I suppose. I lived a very nomadic live when I was younger. What about you, any exciting plans?”

“Nah, might do a bit of housekeepin, maybe work on a new model ship” he winces, as if admitting that was a mistake.

“I’m impressed, I could never focus on one task long enough to complete something like that.”

“Oh, uh, thanks. Most fellas think it’s an old man hobby.” Duck scratches the back of his neck nervously, clearly caught off guard by Indrid’s complement.

“It is, but there’s nothing wrong with that if it’s something you enjoy. How’d you get started with it?”

“My grandad used to have me help with his. Dropped out of the habit of doin’ it when I hit my teen years, and then one day…”

——————————-

Alright, it’s not one of the better dates Indrid’s been on.

It’s the best.

Duck is the same as he is when they chat at the bar; charming, funny, tells a mean (albeit a bit winding) anecdote. Indrid’s mind generally flips and flits a thousand directions at once, but with Duck in front of him he finds there’s only one thing he wants to focus on.

They’ve finished dinner and are waiting on dessert when Duck laughs at something Indrid says and brushes his toe against the skinnier mans leg under the table. Indrid tries to keep his face neutral (Duck is just showing him how he does things during dates, and soft, flirtatious touches must be part of that and Indrid cannot, cannot read into it), but Duck clearly spies something crossing it. Because he repeats the motion, slower this time, talking casually as if nothing is happening. The touches become more frequent after that, hand brushing Indrid’s own on the table or staying a moment longer than normal on his arm when  emphasizing a point. Indrid returns them, let’s his gaze linger on Ducks eyes or lips and makes sure Duck notices him doing so.

Eventually they have to leave the warmth of the restaurant and head back into the bitter spring wind. Duck once again offers his arm and Indrid takes it, nestling as close as he can to the larger man while still allowing them both to walk.

“Can we, uh, debrief?” Duck asks as they get back to Indrid’s apartment.

“Only if we do it inside, come along.” He fumbles the key into the lock (blasted gloves) and leads Duck to his place on the top floor (he loves the view and the fact that heat rises).

“Do want anything to drink while we talk? Coffee, tea, I think I still have some nog.”

“It ain’t gone bad yet?”

“No.” He lies.

Duck pats the couch next to him and Indrid sits down.

“So, how’d I do. Can I see the notes?”

Indrid hands him the notebook, trying to think of a response to the inevitable question.

“Wait, you didn’t write anythi’n?”

He shakes his head.

“No, I didn’t.”

Duck looks confused, even hurt.

“It’s not because I didn’t want to help you, Duck. It’s because I couldn’t find anything to write. I haven’t enjoyed myself this much on a date in years. I don’t know what’s happening with the other guys you’ve gone out with, but what I do know is that I wish it had been me instead of them on every one of those dates, just so I could have spent more time with you.”

Duck considers him for a moment, worrying his lower lip.

“There’s on thing I ain’t shown you. Ain’t done it on all the dates, just a few that seemed promisin’. Can I try it on you?”

“Of course.” Indrid nods, leans forward to better hear whatever Duck says next.

Duck leans forward too, and tentatively presses his lips against Indrids. Indrid gasps, then kisses him back, bumps their noses together when Duck pulls away for a breath before diving back in. Duck makes a low, pleased sound and Indrid can’t help it, brings his hands into that dark hair as strong, warm fingers grip his hips.

“‘Drid.” He whispers against his mouth, a prayer and a plea and that does it, Indrid needs to be closer, tries to climb into his lap just as Duck tries to adjust on the couch, sending them tipping backwards.  He lands on Duck with an soft “oof”, breaking the kiss to laugh against as shoulder as the other man giggles against his cheek.

“That, uh, that ain’t happened any of the other times.” He strokes the strands of pale hair back behind Indrids ears, “guess I hadn’t found the right person to try it on.”

“Guess not.” Indrid kisses his neck once, playfully.

“Can I take you out again?”

Indrid raises up on his elbow, speechless for a moment at the sight of the happy, handsome man beneath him. But then he remembers he ought to answer the question.

“Nothing would make me happier.”

#Indruck #indrid cold/duck newton #au list prompt #prompt fills

[babbushka]

Blue Moon (3/?)

New York, 1987. The air was filled with smog and the streets were ridden with crime. Just another day in paradise. Your quiet life turns upside down when a striking man moves in across from you. You’re falling, fast, into a love that could never, ever, happen…or could it?

Pale x Reader (Can also be interpreted as modern!kylo for those who don’t know Burn This!)

Hello friends this chapter is so so long, I hope it hold you all over for the week until I can post again. 

This chapter (and all the other chapters that have come before and will come after) is dedicated to the one and only @adamsnackdriver who even though she says otherwise is absolutely instrumental to this monument of filth! Please go follow her if you haven’t already, her blog is an absolute gold mine!!

Minor character spoilers for Pale!

Word Count: 8200 (I’m sorry lol)

Warnings: Mild angst, minor violence, sm*t, language, drug use

Chapter 3: Chains

It went like that for days. He got off work, he found you, he fucked you, he left. It was easier that way, wasn’t it? It had to be. He was busy, you were busy, he couldn’t stay. This wasn’t romantic, this wasn’t tender, you were a good place to relieve some tension, that’s all.

He had been relieving his tension a lot, but that was nobody’s fucking business. He went to work, he got high, he blasted through the fucking day, and then he came to your door. You either opened the door or you weren’t home yet, but you always opened. Always let him in, never kicked him out when he broke in if you weren’t there. He was spending more and more time at your place, your shitty apartment just one street away, how’d the universe fucking figure that? He never stayed. You always let him in, and he always left.

He was on his way to you now, just got off work too fucking late, so late it was early. So late that the sun was already coming up over the fucking skyline and the 9-to-5 schmucks were already polluting the fucking streets. You were probably asleep he figured, you had the day off so why shouldn’t you be asleep? What was better than getting fucked first thing in the morning, nothing, right?

He parked his fucking car behind his apartment building and walked over to yours, jaywalked and yelled at the fucking cars who had the nerve to keep driving. What the fuck ever happened to pedestrians had the right of way?

He managed to catch the door to the stairwell just as the mail-man was heading in. That was lucky, he’d been getting lucky lately, getting into the stairwell. Sometimes he had to climb the fucking fire escape just to get in.

“Hey!” He called, and the man stopped. “You got any mail for 5C?” He asked. His pulse spiked when the mailman nodded.

“Yeah, a couple things.” He said, rifling through his bag.

“I’m headin’ up that way now, been waitin’ on a real important fucking letter.” He lied. He wanted to know your name, desperately, wanted to have something to shout out when he fucked his hand when you weren’t home. “You ever look through people’s mail? I would, all the fuckin’ time if I were a mail-man. Bet you’d see some pretty juicy fuckin’ stuff. You know my uncle used to be a postal worker, he dealt with shipping and handling, I know the hours fucking suck – hey do you happen to know – ” Pale said around his cigarette, only shutting up when the mail-man shoved a pile of letters into his chest.

“Here you go pal, I got a long route.” The man said, making Pale frown.

“Well fuck me, sorry for trying to make some fucking conversation.” He scoffed, but deciding it wasn’t worth it, not with you right upstairs.

(Y/N). There it was, printed right on the fucking envelope. A little bent and had some water damage, thanks to the fucking post office, but there it was. He had been trying to figure out your fucking name for weeks, you being the smart-ass you were not telling him. It was driving him fucking off the walls not knowing your name, but he finally fucking had it in his hands.

(Y/N). Right in black ink.

Past Due. Stamped in red ink next to it.

“What the fuck?” He frowned, not giving a shit and tearing open the envelope right in the middle of the fucking stairwell.

They had shut off your heat, those fucking bastards. He was going to make them fucking regret that – he got all wound up until he saw that you had missed the deadline by almost three fucking weeks. No wonder it was freezing all the fucking time in your apartment, he thought.

It wasn’t even that much, he had more than your bill was in his fucking pocket.

He went back down the stairs to the little deli. Marty was there, and he wasn’t too fucking happy to see Pale, but he never was. Who gave a shit? He had to fix your fucking bill before they shut the water off too, which they were fucking fixing to do if they didn’t get their money by Sunday. Jesus, he thought, it was like the fucking mob, these damn utilities.

“You got a pen?” Pale asked.

“Fresh out.” Marty sniffed.

Big fucking mistake, Pale thought.

He grabbed Marty by the front of his shitty apron, pulled him flush to the fucking glass counter, and plucked the clearly visible pen from right out of his apron pocket, and let him go. Marty was rearing up to swing a fucking fist at him, when the bell to the door opened, and a hungry customer walked up to the counter asking for a half dozen bagels with lox.

Pale used the distraction to fill out the fucking form and return envelope the utilities people sent you, slapped the pen on the top of the counter and went back outside. He unrolled crisp hundred dollar bills, enough to pay off the next couple months.

It was about to get real fucking cold here, with the holidays coming up soon. The weather man on the radio said snow should show up in the next day or two, he didn’t need you fucking dying from exposure in your own fucking apartment.

He licked the envelope and shut it, shoved it in the blue public mailbox on the side of the road, and made his way back up your fucking stairs. He was angry, hands clenched into fucking fists as he climbed up the stairs two at a time. His mind started spiraling, thinking of all the bad fucking things that could happen – no heat, no water, no electric, what the fuck were you thinking?

He jostled your fucking lock and barged into your apartment, pissed off. Even more so because you were standing in your fucking kitchen, in nothing but your fucking panties, looking like a god damned angel, making some breakfast. 

Like you didn’t know you were in trouble.  

“Morning.” You smiled at him, all bright and lit from the sun, but he wasn’t fucking having it, he put your mail on the table with a little more force than was probably fucking necessary.

“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me you were behind on your fucking bills?” He didn’t bother saying hello, he was too mad.

Your smile fell, you turned away to look at the pan on the stove. You knew you were in trouble now.

“It was just the one. I was going to handle it.” You said.

“You were going to handle it? When the fuck were you gonna handle it, huh? That ain’t fucking good enough doll, you can’t go doing shit like that. You know how people get sick? You see them fucking folks dying out there? It’s because they do shit like this, you can’t go fucking doing this shit.” Pale started pacing the kitchen, running a hand through his hair and punctuating the air with the other.

“Don’t yell at me.” You immediately got defensive, and that made Pale more pissed off.

“I’m not yelling! I’m not fucking yelling, okay?” He yelled, taking a deep breath and trying but failing to calm the fuck down, “If you got a problem, you tell me about it. That’s what the fuck I do, okay? I solve fucking problems. Cook doesn’t show up, I’m the fucking cook. Shipment don’t get delivered? I gotta fucking go pick shit up. I got twenty fucking years of solving problems, next time you fucking tell me. Don’t go not telling me bullshit like this!”

His voice got louder and louder, until he realized he was shaking. He realized you were shaking too. Regret burned in his throat like acid.

“Pale – please I don’t – I – ” You hiccupped, and in a fucking instant he was trying to make himself not the least fucking bit threatening as he went to you, felt like he was having a heart attack with the way your eyebrows pinched and your fucking chin wobbled and the way he saw wetness in your pretty fucking eyes.

“Oh shit, wait – no,” He said, real quiet, burning burning burning, “Fuck, no, come here. Don’t cry, okay? Come here.” He wrapped you up in his arms, and you tucked your face into his chest.

“I was gonna – ” Your voice cracked, but he just tilted your head up and kissed you real long, real gentle, trying to apologize.

He kissed you slow, calming you down and him down at the same time. He licked against your mouth, but then pulled back and pressed a couple chaste kisses to your lips too, holding you tight.

“Shh, don’t.” He said soft, “I didn’t mean to yell, I just gotta make sure you’re fucking taken care of, okay?”

“Okay.” You nodded, your eyes searching his.

“Lemme kiss you, huh? Gotta warm you up, you’re freezing.” He said, and you nodded, tilted your head up to kiss him some more. He dusted a few stray droplets off of your cheek, kissed the corners of your eyes. “No tears, okay?”

“Okay.” You sniffled. You shifted closer to him, rubbing yourself all over his clothes, sighing at how the fabric felt against you. Pale could feel your hard fucking nipples through the cotton of his shirt – his mouth watered.

“I was hoping you’d come by, I was making breakfast for us.” You gestured to the pan that had apparently just finished heating up some butter.

“I can’t fucking believe I’m saying this but go put a fuckin’ robe on. It’s cold.” He kissed you one more time before letting you go, “I’ll finish breakfast.”

“I was making pancakes.” You said with a smile, walking into your bedroom.

Pale surveyed the situation, what kinda fucking pancake recipe was this, he thought, raiding your cabinets and fridge – that was another fucking thing he was gonna have to deal with at some point, getting you to have more than just one shelf on the fridge filled. He wasn’t gonna bring it up.

“What the fuck is that?” He asked when you came back, flipping flapjacks like no fucking problem.

“It’s my robe.” You said, posing with a goofy grin, tears all gone. You were trying to be sultry like some girl in a fucking magazine.

“No it ain’t.” Pale shook his head, couldn’t help but fuckin smile at you, you looked so wrong in something that ratty. It was once a bathrobe in a previous fucking life, but it was discolored and worn out, too many washes.

“Well unless you stashed a different one in my closet then yeah it is.” You pointed out, making him lick his teeth.

He had hidden a bunch of shit in your apartment, guess you were going looking for it then huh? He would have to take you up on that and go out and get you something you should be wearing, something soft and warm.

“Eat your fucking pancakes.” He said, and you did.

He ate you out after you finished, while the pan was soaking in the sink. He fucked you after that, made you cry for a whole different fucking reason, and then he went across the fucking street to pass out. You told him he could stay, but he knew he couldn’t, he shouldn’t. So he didn’t.

He missed you.

He was gonna find you when he got off work, take you out to a nice fucking dinner. He wanted to give you something, the little something that had been burnin a hole in his fucking pocket for a week now. Wanted to push you up against the wall and make you come for dessert. God knows he fucking deserved it. Everything and everyone was pissing him the fuck off.

Fucking phone kept blowing up, he wanted to yank the power cord outta the fucking wall. How many fucking times did he gotta yell at these people before they figured out how to do their fuckin’ jobs? He was stressed, he was aggravated, he was –

“Pale, someone here to see you.” Joey, one of the busboys stuck his head in the door.

“I don’t fuckin’ want to see anyone.” Pale frowned, didn’t these fucking losers know he was busy?

“What, so you can show up at my job but I can’t bother you at yours?” You asked, making his eyebrows shoot up as you walked into the office.

“You gotta be kiddin’ me.” He whistled.

You looked good, wearing that shitty coat and those scuffed heels and your hair all done up.

Apparently that wasn’t the fuckin’ reaction you were hoping for, and you scowled at him. What, was he supposed to be some kind of mind reader?

“I can go if you really don’t want me.” You said, already ready to get defensive.

“Get the fuck over here.” He shook his head, beckoning you with a hand. You immediately went to his lap, like it was your favorite fuckin’ place to be. “What? You wanna get fucked in my office? That it? Slut.”

“Uh huh.” You said with a smile, already kissing at him, rubbing your cold nose against his cheek.

“Go and lock the door.” Pale said, smacking your ass when you shimmied off his lap and clicked the lock.

You hesitated by the door for a minute, like you were waitin’ for something, and Pale was just about to ask what when you untied the thick leather belt and popped open the big metal buttons that held it together.

It had only slid down a couple of inches before Pale figured out you were almost naked under there, and was outta his seat in a heartbeat.

“Jesus, you really are a slut, ain’t ya?” He said, crowding you against the door.

He was blindingly hard, his cock begging him to get in you, once he saw the scraps of black lace you figured counted as lingerie.

“Let me warm you up, huh?” Pale said, licking his lips as the coat fell in a pool of fabric on the floor.

You were standing there, tits out, only wearing some lacy black panties and stockings held up by garters. God what a set of legs you had, he thought.

You whined into his mouth when he manhandled you, picked you up and sat your ass over on his desk that had piles and piles of fucking papers all over it, pushed your knees apart. He felt like he couldn’t get his cock out fast enough.

“Pale, please, fuck me.” You ran your hands over his shoulders, was pulling him to lean over you, was kissing his cheek, his neck.

He couldn’t say no to that.

He pulled your underwear down off your legs, stuffed it in your mouth.

“You gotta be quiet you whore, alright?” He said lowly, dangerously. “Can’t have folks out there enjoying their lunch hear a slut get fucked, alright?”

“Mmhm.” You hummed, muffled by the lacy. Filthy girl, he thought, adrenaline spiking.

He rubbed his cock at your slit for a minute, savoring the feeling of it like some of those cocksuckers out there might be savoring their hundred dollar bottle of fucking wine, before shoving his way into you. He always liked the surprised face you made whenever he first thrust into you, like you had never felt like that before. He could almost get drunk on that fucking face.

“We gotta make this fast, okay?” He couldn’t take his time with you the way he wanted, not with people knocking on his fucking door every twenty minutes at this fucking place. But twenty minutes was enough to get you off if he did his job right, and fuck if he wasn’t gonna deliver.

You bit down on your own underwear and nodded, nipples hard, so fucking hard. Pale sucked one into his mouth, bent you back far enough on the desk that he could reach without having to stop the rhythm of his hips. The desk creaked under the two of yous, iron legs scraping against the floor bit by bit as his hips smacked yours.

You were makin’ all sorts of pretty fucking sounds, sounds that made him sweat. He was wearing all his clothes, they were gonna smell like sex after he was done with you. He never wanted to wash them.

He licked his teeth, pushed you flat against the desk, pulled one of your legs over his shoulder, drove into you hard and rough. He shoulda bound your wrists, but you were doing a good job keeping them above your head, gripping the edge of the desk.

He thrust over your g-spot, that made you arch up a little. He licked his lips, did it again. He was gonna say something stupid, something like how good you looked, how pretty your lips were, how he wanted to spit into your mouth and make you swallow it. He bit on your other nipple instead, thrust against you and rubbed at your clit.

You said something that sounded like his name, and you were clenching down on him, making him come.

“Fuck, shit – ” He fucked you through his orgasm, making sure you got off too, fucked you hard and rubbed your clit and sucked on your nipple until you threw your head back and came.

He tugged the panties out of your mouth, stuffed them in his pocket. He was breathing hard, you wiped the sweat from his forehead and rubbed it all over your chest. Pale was still pushing his come into you, he could feel it, feel the way it was throbbing into your cunt. You were breathing real hard too.

You didn’t seem to mind, looked all too comfortable on his shitty desk in his crappy office, lookin like the cat that got the cream, even though he was the one who did all the hard fucking work. You just had to lay back and take it, seedy princess. You took it well, he had to fuckin’ admit.

He pulled out of you, watched his come ooze out of you. He pushed it back in, fucked his fingers into you until you were squirming from it being too much, and then he did it some more. You smiled.

He stepped away from you just enough so that you could get off the desk.

“Hey I was thinkin,” Pale said, something in his chest beatin like nervousness. You had slipped between his legs, licking up the last bits of come, cleaning him off. He detangled his fingers from your hair, tucked it back behind your ears. “If you ain’t busy, the two of us go out to dinner tonight.”

You sat back, wiped your mouth with your hand, looked up at him through your lashes. He tucked his cock back into his trousers before he could think about fucking you again.

“Where’re we goin?” You asked with an easy breezy smile, as if you weren’t just biting down on your own underwear to muffle your cries.

“You like steak?” He asked, mind already running through the best fucking places in New York to take you.

“I like steakhouses.” You said, and he didn’t know what the fuck that meant, but he nodded.

“Then we’ll go to a steakhouse.” He decided, and you smiled, looked around for your coat. He watched you cover up those perfect fucking tits, it made his mood sour. He wanted to get one last good look at you. “Take the subway into Manhattan, then to Brooklyn. You take the subway a lot?” He asked.

“Not really.” You shrugged.

“Don’t go expectin’ nothing fuckin’ fancy.” He said, right when the phone rang. “Get outta here, I’ll come get you after I get off work.” Pale sat back in his chair, picked up the phone and started talking. “Yeah – what the fuck do you need now?...”

You nodded with a smile, leaned over to kiss him. He pinched at your nipple, covered the receiver of the phone with his other hand.

“Don’t go getting into any trouble.” He said, and you nodded.

It was gonna be a long fucking rest of his day, he thought, watching you walk away like that.

Pale didn’t bother waiting for you to answer the door, he had a schedule to keep and he’d be damned if he didn’t make it. He shook the door handle enough that the lock popped open – that made him frown, how the fuck was anyone supposed to stay safe in this building? – and let himself in.

“Train’s in twenty minutes.” He announced himself.

“You could say hello.” You said with a smile, walking into the living room from the bedroom. You were dressed up real pretty, Pale thought, you looked like a million bucks. Well, maybe closer to a hundred bucks, but it was still nice. Better than that fucking apron and hat you always wore at the fuckin diner.

Pale had you naked so often he almost forgot how good you looked all covered up. Not that anything beat the fucking way you looked all blissed out in bed.

“Hello.” He said dryly, took his finger and tapped his lips.

You smiled, stood on your tiptoes to give him a kiss. He wound an arm around you, groped at your ass and gave it a light pat before handing you the fuckin bouquet of lilies.

“You brought me flowers.” You said, surprised.

“Yeah go put them in a fuckin’ vase somewhere. It’ll liven up the place a little.” Pale sniffed, god your apartment sucked.

“What, you don’t like exposed walls and absolute lack of flooring?” You joked, going to the kitchen and pulling out a big glass cup.

You stuck the flowers in there, filled up the cup with water. Didn’t you have a fucking vase? You had to be kidding him.

“It was getting too fuckin’ depressing fucking you here.” He shrugged, stuffing his hands in his jacket pocket. He tried real hard not to say anything about the glass, about the flowers, about anything. He just wanted to take you out to dinner and fuck your brains out.

“You could fuck me at your apartment if it bothers you too much.” You pointed out, and he almost wanted to laugh. Almost.

He did roll his eyes, and you smiled, knowing that was probably as close as you were gonna fuckin get.

“Don’t be a smart-ass.” He said, pulling you to him, kissing you deep. He liked the way his hand was so fucking big on your face, he liked the way you kissed at his palm, licked at it. “You look real nice.”

“Yeah?” You asked, sounding nervous.

“Yeah.” He said, tugging at your sleeve. “I ain’t seen you wear this little number yet.”

“I’ve been saving it.” You tucked some hair behind your ear, smiled at him.

“For what?” He asked.

“An occasion.” You shrugged. That was fucking stupid he thought, and said as much.

“You don’t need an occasion to look good.” He said, “Look at me, I run around all fucking day, spend most of my fuckin time in the office or in my car going somewhere, looking for fucking parking in this sewer of a city. I don’t got no fancy fuckin people I’m meeting, but I still like to look good. These are snake-skin boots, almost three hundred fucking dollars they cost me. You don’t need a fuckin’ occasion, sometimes it’s good to just look good. You look good.”

He was getting worked up, fuck why did you always fucking do this to him?

“I was hoping you’d like it.” You grinned, and he shook his head – you knew what you did to him, you fucking menace. That’s what you were, a menace.

“You did good.” He kissed you one more time, real hard, hand still on your face, “Let’s go, we’re gonna be late and they fucking hate it when people are late to their reservations.”

 Pale walked with his arm around you to the train station, held you close. He didn’t like the way some of the fucking guys on the street looked at you when he watched you from his apartment – didn’t like the way he could practically fucking hear what they were thinking. So he held you close, a warning to anyone who saw that you weren’t up for grabs, unless it was his fuckin hands.

You didn’t say anything about how gross the subway was, Pale liked that. He liked a girl who didn’t give a shit about shit like that. There was graffiti all over the fuckin place, so much that Pale couldn’t even read any of it, what a fucking waste of paint, he thought.

There was trash in the whole car, broken glass and old newspapers that had gotten wet with something and dried all crusty. He didn’t want you sitting in any of that shit, not looking so good.

“Sit on my lap.” Pale said, finding a clean seat and tugging you down onto him. “You’ll get your skirt all dirty.”

“We’re all alone.” You said, coy.

“Yup. Will be for half a fuckin hour, looks like.” He tipped your chin up, slid his tongue along yours.

He liked the way it felt when you slipped your arms around his shoulders, he tightened his grip on your thighs, dug his fingers right into the bruises that he knew where there, the bruises he fucking put there himself.

“Yeah?” You sighed into his mouth.

“Yeah there’s no fuckin’ stop until ours.” He didn’t bother looking outside the subway windows, you were in the tunnels now, and it was dark anyway. The shitty broken lights flickered in the subway car. You kept kissing him.

“I’m starting to think you just like keeping me close.” You said, teasing. The biggest fucking understatement of the century. He didn’t know what the fuck was happening to him, how he let you get under his skin like this, the way you had.

“Gold fuckin’ sticker sweetheart.” He grumbled, sneering at you when you started smiling all triumphant. “Don’t go fucking looking at me like that, keepin’ you close is the easiest way to get my hands on you, get you ready for me. I don’t like to wait, you know.”

“I know.” You smiled.

“Why don’t you be a good girl and ride me, huh?” He asked, sneaking a hand in between your thighs. God he was so fucking thrilled to find you already wet, always so fucking eager for him. He owned this pussy, whether you knew it or not this was his to fuck whenever he wanted, and shit if he didn’t want to fuck it now.

“Okay.” You nodded, shifted around a little.

You held onto the silver handrail pole while you balanced on your knees as Pale got his dick out of his jeans. He reached under your skirt again, tugged aside your panties – lingerie again, he was pleased as all fuck to find – and slid in.

It was rough and bumpy, being on the fucking train. Any time the god damned subway made a turn, you were falling into him, losing your fucking balance. You were lucky you had him to hold you still, Pale thought, as he thrust up into you.

“Pale!” You moaned loud for him, the sound almost getting swallowed by the rushing noise of the subway in the tunnels.

“That’s it sweetheart.” He licked his lips, leaned back in the hard metal seat and watched you go to work.

He wanted to tear your fucking clothes off, wanted your tits in his face. He settled for letting one hand wander up to grab at your chest, grunting and groaning as you worked your hips over him.

“My good little whore.” He couldn’t help but give you praise, especially when your cunt was so good and hot and wet for him. He shoved a couple fingers in your mouth, you sucked on them right away, laved your tongue over them, over his wedding ring. His stomach tensed at that. “Dirty.”

“Good?” You asked, and he gripped your jaw, clicked his teeth against yours.

“You know it fucking is, slut.” He growled, making you smile against his hand.

Attention all passengers, the next stop is... The PA voice over the intercom sounded. You moaned loud, Pale almost didn’t hear what the fuck she said, Estimated time of arrival, fifteen minutes.

“You fuckin’ hear that princess? You got fifteen minutes to make me come before we get off this fucking subway car.” Pale grabbed a fistful of your beautiful fucking hair and pushed your head down closer to his, so he could kiss at your neck and suck marks into your throat.

You nodded, whining against him. Your hands were braced against his chest, fisting at his shirt. It was gonna wrinkle the fucking fabric and he was gonna have to iron the fucking thing but it was worth it to feel you lick at the pulsing vein in his neck.

He couldn’t help but fuck up into you, couldn’t help but hold your hip and your hair and grind his cock hard into you, not with the fucking way you looked, sounded, felt. It was enough to make a guy go crazy, he thought, the smell of your fucking perfume filling his nose as he breathed hard and fast.

The subway jostled and bottles clanked as they rolled around on the floor, but you were moaning and panting and your thighs were squeezing his tight and your cunt was hot and he couldn’t help but fucking think it was magic that made you look like that, in the flickering fucking lights.

He shoulda had you blow him instead, wouldn’t have gotten him this worked up. He didn’t know how he was gonna sit through a fucking dinner with you, not looking like that.

You moved your hips in these tiny fucking circles that had Pale clenching his jaw it felt so fucking good, he wanted to kill whoever you had to practice on, didn’t want anyone to ever get to feel this good from you again. No one else ever let him fuck them like this, he didn’t want to fuck anyone else like this.

You were kissing him, god he felt like he couldn’t get enough to breathe with how much you were kissing him, how much he was kissing you back, all hard bites and sloppy.

“Come in me,” You told him, and his brain tripped up.

“Jesus.” He bit down on your shoulder and came.

Slowly he released the tension in his fist in your hair, had a hard time opening his fucking fist he had held it so tight. You were approaching the station, the lights flickering faster and faster. People were standing waiting on the platform as the subway zipped past – but it was slowly starting to come to a stop.

“You did good.” He pinched at your cheek. You didn’t look too thrilled. “What?” He asked, lifting your hips enough to slide out of you, tuck himself into his pants. He’d clean up once he got your ass to the restaurant.

“I didn’t get to come.” You pouted, and oh no, no fucking way was he indulging you in that one, not right now. He was entirely too susceptible to your charms and you were dangerously close to missing the fucking reservation as it was. He’d fuck you after.

“We’ll have a nice fucking dinner and then I’ll blow your fucking back out, how’s that sound?” Pale kissed you, kissed you and kissed you a-fucking-gain until you were smiling against his lips, squirming in his lap. “Hm?”

“Promise?” You asked, standing up when the subway brakes screeched to a harsh stop.

“No fuckin’ promises.” Pale said, a possessive hand on the small of your back that made you smile again.

The two of you walked off onto the platform at the station. Pale smirked, smug as all hell, all the fucking strangers walking onto the subway were none the wiser.

The restaurant was nice, the nicest in Brooklyn, and one of the oldest too. He knew the guys who worked there, being in the business. He knew the guys in the business too, that worked in the restaurant. It was all the fucking same, he thought. He walked with you right up to the host and didn’t even have to give his fucking name, that’s how friendly he was with this place.

“Pale this is too much.” You whispered, hanging off his arm like the best piece of fucking candy there ever was.

“What do you mean?” He asked as the two of you followed the host. He seated you in a real secluded section of the restaurant. Pale slipped him a hundred bucks, no one would be sitting anywhere near you for the night.

“I mean I can feel your come sliding down my thigh and I’m pretty sure that glass of champagne cost more than this whole outfit.” You said, self-conscious.

“Just relax would ya? We’re gonna have a real nice time.” He kissed your cheek, let you pick which side of the booth you wanted to sit on.

“Sit next to me?” You asked when he made a move to step around the table.

He looked at you for a second, at your earnest fucking eyes and slid into the booth next to you, pulling you real close to him. You smiled real wide. It made him want to burn down half the fucking city – in a good way. Was there a good way for that?

He stretched an arm around your shoulders, was pointing out all the interesting fucking things he could think about the steakhouse. You laughed at his jokes and made some back, he thought you were fucking funny when you weren’t being such a brat.

“Good evening, what’ll it be?” The waiter asked, appearing out of nowhere.

Pale didn’t even bother asking you what you wanted, just ordered for you anyway. Ordered the wine, ordered the appetizer, the dinner, and dessert. He had other plans for dessert, but he wanted you to have the full fucking experience.

He didn’t take his hands off you the whole fucking time, didn’t even bother to open up the menu, just wanted to keep his hands on your shoulder, on your thigh.

He didn’t take it off when the food showed up either, delicious and sizzling hot. Didn’t bother to give the finger to the fucking waiter who shot him dirty looks as Pale groped at you while he poured the wine.  

“What do you like to do for fun?” Pale asked, suddenly desperately curious.

“Fun?” You asked with a raised eyebrow. “I don’t know, I don’t really get much time for fun, outside of being with you.” You shrugged.

“You have fun when you’re with me?” Pale asked, shocked. That was probably the first fucking time anyone had ever said something like that to him.

“Yeah, you make me laugh, I like spending time with you.” You said, again with that fucking honesty.

Pale didn’t know what to do with that, didn’t know what to say to that.

“You like it?” Pale asked instead, as you were happily chewing your dinner. You washed it down with a sip of wine, and smiled.

“Yeah, it’s really good.” You nodded, dabbing your lips with a napkin. He wanted to kiss you.

“I thought you would. That’s my fucking recipe by the way, gave it to the chef something like five fucking years ago, it’s the most popular fucking dish here. I should be collecting royalty checks or something. I wanted you to enjoy tonight, you know? You deserve to enjoy things, you work hard too. It’s a fuckin’ shame you don’t get paid good. You know what I think? I think it’s fuckin funny we work in the same ‘biz. Go fucking figure.” Pale said, taking a sip of wine himself.

“I have something for you. Before you go getting all fucking lovey-dovey eyes on me, it’s a practical fucking gift. It ain’t a grand fucking gesture or nothing like that, I just want you to have it. If you want it. You don’t have to fucking want it if you don’t want it, but – Just go ahead and open it.” He fished the long rectangular box out of his inside jacket pocket, handed it to you without any ceremony.

You hesitantly opened it up, covered your mouth when you saw the way it glittered.

“It’s beautiful.” You held up the gold chain, almost pure fucking gold, the same kind of chain that Pale wore.

“I was in the fucking city at three o’clock in the fucking morning if you can believe that, and all the fucking shops are getting ready for the holidays. Christmas is such a bullshit holiday, you ask me. People buying shit to just buy shit. Anyway so I go into the fucking city at three o’clock in the morning and I see all these fucking windows of all these stores and I think to myself, why the hell not, buy something nice for someone. And I think, who the fuck am I gonna buy anything for? I send my kids shit, whatever they want, whenever they fucking want it, they call me up and I ask and I send it and that’s it. You don’t ever fucking ask for anything, you know that? And you don’t got a lot of nice shit. People get real judgy over people who don’t have nice shit, I didn’t want you getting judged. You’re not a two-bit whore or nothing – you like it?” He asked, taking another sip of wine.

“I love it, put it on me?” You asked him, looking up with those lovey-dovey fucking eyes anyway. Didn’t he just fucking tell you it wasn’t no grand fuckin gesture?

“If you put that on, you can’t go takin it off.” He said, something fierce and possessive deep in his belly, he stared at you, watching you when he asked, “Got that?”

You got it, he could tell you got it from the way you smiled at him, handed him the chain, turned around and held your hair off your neck.

He willed his hands not to shake as he clasped the chain around your neck, felt something in his chest seize up when you turned back around to face him.

“How does it look?” You said, all shy.

He did kiss you then.

He kissed you when you ate your dinner, kissed you on the subway ride home, kissed you as you were walking backwards into your apartment.

You walked away for a minute to turn on the light, a single floor lamp that made the whole room soft and orange. You pulled off your clothes, he was mesmerized by the way the shadows hit the curves of your body.

“Get over here.” He said, hands searching his pockets. Where the fuck did he put it? Oh, there it was, little plastic baggie tied off at the top.

“How do ya want me?” You asked, already straddling his thighs, already wantin’ to be near to him. Pale clenched his jaw, his heart racing, going a million miles a fucking minute. The light glinted off the chain, he’d been aching for you. He couldn’t believe you were wearing it, that you wanted to wear it.

“Just like this for a fucking second.” He kissed at your neck, undid the tie on the baggie before pulling you closer to him, pushing your knees into his side. It didn’t even fucking matter, he was gonna be over the moon in a minute anyway.

He popped the clasps of your bra, yanked it off. He grabbed at your tits, pushed them together. He had to stop himself from just fucking pressing his whole face in your cleavage, breathing in the smell of your soap and your sweat there, licking up the taste of you. God he couldn’t get enough of the taste of you.

He closed his eyes against the feeling of your hands in his hair, right at the base of his neck, curling your fingers there, you kissing his cheek, you breathin deep, expanding your ribcage, pushing your tits into his hands.

He tipped the smallest little bump out onto your tits, the way they were pushed together like that held it long enough for him to snort it right up, let go of you for a second to pinch his nose and blink a few times, breathing out, he could already feel it working.

“Pale.” You moaned into his ear, makin him break out in goosebumps, what a fuckin’ mess, he thought.

“What, d’ya want some?” He asked, but you shook your head.

“No thanks.” You said sweetly, god you were too fuckin sweet to him, he thought. He wanted to jump you, he was all over the place, he wanted to hold you down and fuck you and kiss you and make you shout his name and make the neighbors bang their fucking fist on the fucking wall. He wanted to make you feel good, make you make him feel good.

You were impatient, it made him smile -- your hands were shakin. Why were they shakin? He was the one shakin for you. You pushed his jacket off his arms, he smiled, bit at your lips as you worked to get him even a fraction of naked like you were. He pulled the jacket off, yanked the shirt off his neck, you pulled open the buttons on his pants, you were desperate for him.

He pulled his cock out, you immediately wrapped a hand around it, gave it a good squeeze. He thought about a symphony in his head, had the urge to scratch it out with a shitty piece of charcoal and a scrap of paper, maybe the receipt from breakfast at the diner. You looked too fucking good in that shitty uniform. The music kept going and goin in his head, he wanted to fuck you.

He wrapped a big arm around you, steadying you and standing up, taking you with him. You instinctively tucked your legs around his waist, he carried you to your bed, kicking off his pants and underwear on the way. He threw you down on your bed, makin you laugh. The light from the streets outside glinted off the chain he gave you.

“Fuck.” He growled, he was seeing stars, sparkles coming off of you, off the chain.

He pried your legs open and slid in, easier now, now that you were getting used to him, to his cock. He liked the thought of that, thrust into you hard.

“Oh!” You gasped, grabbing at his back, wanting him closer.

“You look so fucking good, you know that? Remind me of a fucking amusement park – the lights. You know that? You ever been to Coney Island? You look like all the lights, all at once. Fuck you for that, for lookin’ so good. I want to fuck you up on the fuckin’ wonder wheel, kiss you real hard, make you squirm up there lookin’ over all the fuckin’ lights.” He talked and talked, he had so much to say, couldn’t stop, wanted to tell you everything all at once.

You moaned for him, moaned and gasped and pinched your face real tight when he fucked the air out your lungs. “Look so good taking my fucking cock like that. You like that?”

You were havin a hard time talkin, the way he was fucking you. That made him feel good, the burn in his muscles as he rammed into you made him feel good. God your cunt was so hot and tight around him, he could live there, dive in headfirst and fucking live in your pussy. He grabbed your jaw, held your face steady as he licked at your teeth, bit down on your tongue.

“You like it?” He asked, needing to hear, wanting you to like it.

“Yeah, I like it.” You said with a big smile, and he pinched at your cheek, at your nose, wanted you to stop being so fucking sweet.

His hips worked you into the mattress, headboard smacking against the wall. You filled the air with your noise, the way you gasped for him made him want to yell.

“You don’t even fuckin’ know what you do to me huh? You get me all riled up, just by fuckin standing there looking good. God what a slut, you’re a perfect fuckin’ whore, ain’t you. Making me all riled up.” He smothered you, buried his face in your neck, rammed his dick into you.

“You got me, don’t you?” You said, licking your lips, hand fisting in his hair. “I’m here, ain’t I?” He could tell you were close, you were making that little fucking face you make, he fucked you right on your g-spot, made you cry out, made you clench down around him, made you come.

“Yeah you are, you better fuckin’ better be.” He was losing it, he was gonna come, he didn’t want to, not yet, wanted to keep going with you forever, “You better be, you’re mine, you know that? Jesus.”

“I know, I am – I’m yours.” You panted into his mouth.

He came, shut his eyes real tight, actually fucking saw stars. You did that to him, you made him like that. His heart was racing, he felt like he could run a marathon.

He took a minute to catch his fucking breath, rolled off of you. You settled close to him, didn’t care that he was sweaty. He was coming down, starting to lose the high.

Maybe he would go run, he could run away right now – leave.

“Hey,” He said, pinching your arm to get your attention. You were starting to fall asleep, your head resting on his chest – he should go. He knew he should leave, he always left, he had to leave. He got your attention to tell you he was gonna fucking go.

“You ain’t fucking anyone else, are you?” He asked instead.

“Why does it matter?” You asked back, not even bothering to lift your fucking head up and look at him. He didn’t like that, didn’t know why you had to be so god damned difficult all the time. The chain glittered in the moonlight.

“It just does.” He said, real serious. He didn’t know why, he didn’t know how to fucking explain it to you, he just needed to know. You were wearing it, he needed to know.

“I know you are.” You said, finally looking up at him. He frowned, didn’t like the assumption.

“You don’t know shit about me.” He said, and you rolled off of him, settling down next to him on the bed.

He wanted to kiss you. Your shampoo smelled nice. He had to fucking go.

“I’m clean, if that’s what you were really asking.” You said, and he scoffed. Were you always gonna be like this?

“It wasn’t, but so am I.” He said seriously, and you nodded. He wasn’t gonna let you off the fucking hook that easy. “Now tell me.”

“I am not fucking anyone else.” You said, looking at him like you meant it.

Good, he thought. That was good. He wanted to scream.

He checked the time, it wasn’t even two in the fucking morning yet, he could still go if he wanted.

“Are you gonna keep breaking in like that?” You asked, stretching out on your fucking mattress, looking delicious. He let a hand slide across your stomach, curled just his index finger into your cunt. You smiled.

“Maybe. Probably.” He swallowed hard, “Yes.”

You nodded, arched your back a little. Your tits looked good like that, real fucking good. Maybe he’d stay, get to fuck you in the morning. You were good for him tonight, he could repay you in the morning. Maybe you’d make him breakfast again, like that first night all that time ago, the night that started this whole fucking thing.

He’d fuck you over breakfast.

You went quiet again, did you fall asleep? He wished he knew what was going on in your head, what you were thinking. He wished you would put your fucking head back on his chest. He was losing it.

“How do you spell your name?” You asked, catching him off guard.

His name? What did that have anything to do with anything?  

“P-a-l-e.” He said, rubbing at your clit with his finger, making you sigh all happy. “Like the bucket.”

“That’s p-a-i-l.” You laughed brightly, smiling at him too honest.

“Who gives a shit?” He asked, ghost of a smile at the corners of his mouth.

You put your head back on his chest, he figured you figured he was staying. That meant he had to stay. He let himself wrap an arm around your waist, and the other around your shoulders. Your skin was chilly, all the sweat from when he fucked your brains out cooling. You sighed happily, he was warm, always ran warm. A hundred and ten fucking degrees the doctors said.

You were warm, he couldn’t go now. He was fucked.

He fell asleep.

  That’s it for this chapter!! Please come yell at me your thoughts and thots, i’d love to hear them :)) <3 

Tagging some pals! As always, if you’d like to be added or taken off the list please just shoot me a message!  @fullofbees @spinebarrel @oh-adam@dreamboatdriver @bad–bad–man @thecurlycaptain@bourbonboredom @driverficarchive@aweirdlookingtree@rosalynbair@redhairedfeistynerd@adamsnackdriver @glitzescape@arwarz @adamsnacc-kler @kyloxfem@fallin-for-youreyes @kylo-renne @attorneyl

#reader insert #pale x reader #kylo ren x reader #burn this #burn this broadway #adam driver x reader #my writing #edit: added the chapter name because im a dummie who forgot lol

[makayla-angelic]

Frozen 2: Movie Review

Tonight, on this lovely November 23rd, 2019 evening, I got my turn to see Frozen 2, with my friend Brianna. The movie started at 6:00 pm and I was a bit surprised to see that the theater wasn’t jam packed with people, but considering it was later in the day, I figured that most people had taken their children, (or just gone themselves) much earlier. There were a lot of previews, and holy moly did they go on forever. But at last, the theater went dark, and with my popcorn almost gone, the film began.

Animation

I thought I might start in the area that really caught my attention first. The animation was crisp, clear, and lovely, everything flowed smoothly. I didn’t see anything that looked “out of the ordinary.” The colors meshed together well, and the Enchanted Forest, and Atohallan was beautiful. The characters faces; you could tell they’ve grown a bit older, especially with the new outfits and hair and all, and you can see all the little details, which I found impressive. Animation takes a lot of time and patience. I miss 2D hand-drawn so much.

Animation rating: 10/10

Music

The soundtrack to me was alright, I feel like I definitely liked the first film’s soundtrack better. Into The Unknown was beautiful, and The Next Right Thing was heartbreaking. I guess Lost In The Woods and When I Am Older were alright, but to me, they felt a bit “unnecessary?” And the songs they kind of hit you one after another like bricks to the face. Part of me was thinking, “wow, this is one song after another!” I know Frozen IS a musical, but I feel like they could have toned it down a bit with how frequent the songs were between each scene. I REALLY enjoyed Vuelie in the film though. It’s such a beautiful piece, and I thought the variations that played throughout the sequel, and the Northuldra tribe singing it was amazing. I’m glad the soundtrack came through in terms of this musical piece. Another I noticed too was the choice of musical instruments. I believe what sounded like some type of flute when they arrived at the mist, and the Lost In The Woods song with that electric guitar in the very beginning, which I thought was “new” and kind of unexpected if that makes any sense.

Soundtrack rating: 7.7/10

Plot

Alright, now here’s where all of you are probably going to rip into me. The storyline was...just there. And rushed. Everything moved fast and seemed just kind of “thrown in”. It starts off with Adgar telling little Elsa and Anna about the enchanted forest and why no one can get in or out and that flows fine, but once we get to present day everything kind of feels like it was played in fast forward and skipped some things. One minute were at the Fall Festival, then were at the Charades scene, next Elsa’s hearing voices and awakens the spirits, then suddenly the gang’s in a sled in their new outfits and arriving at the mist. Woah, woah, woah! Why so sudden and soon with everything? It all happens so quick, and why do they not show them getting dressed in their new outfits? I mean, I was thinking there would at least be a scene of them walking out from behind the wardrobe or closet and all commenting on each other’s new outfits. Even Kristoff’s first attempt at the proposal which I found funny seemed like a quick two-second thing. And I caught the “adult” joke in the film; Anna looks at Kristoff and with a suggestive smirk on her face, asks him what he’d like to do.

 Now, for all you people who think dirty-minded from time to time like I do, if Anna was perhaps suggesting that Kristoff “fondle” her while Elsa and Olaf are in the back sleeping, then that’s a bit messed up, and I’m sure Sven doesn’t want to witness that either. Anyways...from there on, meeting the Northuldra people was nice, but even there, the characters we met, I felt like we should have been given more time to learn and understand them. With characters such as Honeymaren and Ryder it felt like they barely had their place and the snippets and teasers we got before and hyped them up a bit more than what they were actually shown. I also thought that perhaps a “bit more” would happen in between before the gang actually arrives at the Enchanted Forest. I thought Elsa using her ice powers to conjure up the memories was pretty sweet, and the scene with them discovering their parents ship and learning the truth was emotional at its best, next to The Next Right Thing scene. I did find Kristoff still trying to propose to Anna funny, despite the circumstances that were before them. The battle with the Nokk was quick and seemed a bit lack-luster. I was kind of expecting a longer battle, but it felt like Elsa tamed him too quickly and when Elsa created reins to throw on him he’s all like “Kay.” And Elsa rides off on him and they are best friends already. Again Atohallan was beautiful and while I was not expecting Elsa to “die” via freezing I knew something would happen to her. Also, not gonna lie, I wasn’t expecting that King Runeard twist, so some points go there. Elsa becomes the fifth spirit and is re-born the true Snow Queen, Anna lures the Jotnarr to the dam to break it, the spirits release everyone, Elsa stops the tidal flood from hitting Arendelle, and Anna and Elsa re-unite, at least for a little bit, because guess what? Elsa’s staying in the Enchanted Forest, alone and free, away from her beloved sister, while Anna and Kristoff become queen and king. *sigh* This ain’t it. I’m sorry but six years to work on this and 50 re-writes yet this is what happens at the end of this fast-paces story? A separation? Isn’t that kind of going against what the first film was about?

Overall, I would say the plot isn’t terrible terrible but it definitely lacks that umph factor the first movie had. It moved way too fast and at times just seemed very thrown together. And anyway, this sequel was supposed to be a totally different story than what we got now, but it got changed because certain writers listened to the wrong people and Ima just leave it at that. For those that know where I stand within the fandom and have browsed through my blog and/or follow me know exactly what I mean, and feel the same way I do.

Plot rating: 6/10

Characters

I enjoy how Elsa, Anna, Elsa, Olaf, Kristoff, and Sven have grown up physically and changed their appearances and such, but one thing that bothers me is that Elsa and Kristoff still don’t seem to interact that much, and at times to me act like they don’t give two flying monkeys about each other. So at the end when Kristoff runs up to Elsa and hugs her tight, I kind of half-went “Oh so he does care?” Anna is definitely different than how she was in the first film, but she is still a bit anxious and takes things out of context, like I can sometimes. For a second when Kristoff was in the sled and the woods trying to propose to her again and Anna started freaking out wondering if something bad was going to happen to them or Elsa I thought, “Okay, who peeked inside my brain and stole a bit of my personality?” Lol. Elsa is beautiful as always, inside and out, and so is Anna, but I loved Elsa’s sass in the beginning of the Into The Unknown scene. Olaf is still funny, perhaps maybe a tad bit more annoying, but maybe it’s just me. And Sven was well, Sven. Again, I wish we could learn a bit more about Mattias, Yelena, Honeymaren, Ryder. They all just seemed “there.” Hopefully if there’s more Frozen stuff coming or even a potential third film in the coming decade of the 2020′s, there will be exploration and interaction with these characters, and even some adventures with the Northuldra tribe. (Now I’m imagining a spin-off series with Honeymaren and Ryder, brother-sister adventures.)

Character rating: 7.8/10

Final Take

The film just felt...off. It almost felt the equivalent of waking up on the day a project is due for class and you bust the whole thing out in 2 hours before you got to go. You did what you were supposed to do, but the teacher can tell you waited until the last minute, and he/she grades it just like that. Again, I know other people in the fandom are probably going to rip into me, but this is honestly how everything came off to me. Everyone likes and does not like certain things, everybody interprets things in life differently, and for me, I like the first film better. It also hits home a little more personally for me too, because of the message it sends out, which also can be interpreted in many different ways too. After a long time of waiting and being excited since the first news of a Frozen sequel came out only to just feel some type of way once the whole is done and over with after all the hype is mildly depressing and infuriating; especially since the sequel was supposed to be something different than what it is now, and again, Ima leave it at that. 

If whether you’re a person who stands or does not stand where I stand within the fandom and know what I’m getting at, I still encourage you to remain civil and please do not send any angry messages to the creators or anybody else, it’s not the polite or mature thing to do. Having an opinion doesn’t justify rude responses, because at the end of the day, we all have our own feelings. I’m not going to hate you if enjoyed Frozen 2 100% but I will hate any troll messages that anybody might send because I didn’t rate this film the rating you wanted. Alas, I do hope there’s more Frozen in the future to come, for all of us to enjoy together. 

-Makayla <3

#frozen #frozen 2 #movie review #2019 #elsa #anna #kristoff #olaf #sven

[vanderlindemangofarm]

Can I request one where the gang reacts to the reader bringing a cat and a bunch of kittens back to camp? This is my favourite blog 🤩

Thank you so much, you’re lovely! 

This turned out super long haha, as a cat lover I adore this scenario! 

Gang Reactions - reader brings home a cat and her kittens

You don’t know why you convinced yourself you could sneak a full-grown, very vocal mama cat and three tiny kittens back into camp without anyone noticing, but there you were, holding a gently wriggling bundle which you tried to hide under your shirt.

Hosea raises his eyebrow as you walk past. “You appear to have an over-active stomach today, Y/N.”

When one of the kittens starts mewing profusely, his eyes widen. You freeze on the spot.

It’s only a matter of seconds before his frostiest stare makes you confess everything. Soon you’re in his tent, spilling the felines onto his cot in an ungainly heap. Hosea scratches his chin, simply uttering a thoughtful “…huh.”

The kittens topple over one another whilst the mother grooms them, tiny mews and purrs breaking the unbearable silence in the tent.

“Dare I ask where you found them?” Hosea queries, rubbing the bridge of his nose. When you explain that you found them under the floorboards of a barn you were looting for supplies, he nods slowly.

Dutch appears at the entrance to the tent as if summoned by forces unknown. He looks agog as his gaze shifts between you, Hosea and the kittens.

Naturally, he’s furious that you didn’t consult him first before bringing them home.

“Did you not think we don’t already have enough trouble around here? That we don’t have enough mouths to feed without…these?” he thunders, his voice cracking as he points at the kittens. You can’t help but feel a bit teary then.

“Look how skinny they are, I couldn’t just leave them! I thought you of all people would understand that, Dutch van der Linde.” you sniffle, the adrenaline rush you felt when bringing them home suddenly crashing spectacularly as you break down into quiet sobs. Dutch lets out a long sigh, wrapping an arm around your shoulders comfortingly.

“Alright, alright.” he grumbles, patting you. “We’ll see what happens. But if they cause any trouble, they’re out. Understood?”

You nod tearfully, not noticing the crowd that had gathered outside the tent, wondering what all the commotion was about.

“Oh my word, look at those sweet kittens!” Mary-Beth squeals, making her way to the front of the group, her hand cupped in front of her mouth.

“Kittens, is it? Ain’t no good thing ever come from kittens. They grow into cats, and everyone knows you should never trust a cat.” slurs Uncle, raising his bottle for effect. Everyone shakes their heads, deciding to ignore his wisdom of the day.

The next few minutes can only be described as euphoric chaos. Every gang member is trying to get into Hosea’s tent to get a good look at the new arrivals. Mary-Beth has gathered up the mama cat in her arms and is cooing softly at her, Jack is begging you to let him name one, Bill is declaring loudly to anyone who’ll listen that he hates cats. 

Eventually, Dutch barks at everyone to go back to their business. He sternly instructs you to take the cat and kittens back to your tent, where they are to stay. They’re your responsibility. 

Jack follows you, almost tripping over his own feet with excitement. He’s never seen kittens before. 

Abigail fetches an old blanket from her own tent which she arranges artfully into a nest at the foot of your cot. Mama cat immediately takes a shine to it, settling herself in the centre whilst the kittens crowd around her. 

Javier, Arthur and Charles all stick their heads around the tent at different intervals, asking if you and your companions are alright. You highly suspect they just wanted to sneak a look at the kittens. 

Pearson gruffly arrives with a shallow dish of milk, which he offers to Mama cat. She laps it up frantically, confirming your theory of them being close to starvation. Pearson watches, looking pleased that he could help.

“Y’know, we always had a cat on the ship when I was in the Navy. Kept the rats away. Maybe our lady here could do the same around camp.” he muses. 

As the days go by, Mama cat gets stronger, her coat thickens up and gets shiny again. The kittens don’t seem phased by their new surroundings, though they aren’t quite bold enough to leave the tent without their mother yet. 

Mary-Beth spends most of her time with you, fussing over the kittens. She’s forever finding little bits of ribbon for them to play with, her face lighting up when they reach for it with their tiny paws. 

Micah is far less impressed. He’s irritated that camp life has been shifted to accommodate some goddamn cats. But, he declares, at least they’re a step up from Cain. 

He avoids the kittens like the plague, but Mama cat takes a shine to him. To his horror, he finds her sleeping inside his hat one morning when he wakes up. 

He tries to shoo her away, but she simply purrs and winds around his legs. 

Before long, the pair are inseparable. Micah calls her Lady Bell. Naturally, the others are in surprised hysterics. 

“Aw, Micah! The kittens have a new daddy!”, “I’ll cut you so deep your daddy’ll feel it, Morgan.”

Arthur likes spending time with the kittens after a long day out of camp. He smiles widely as he tickles them under their little chins. 

Lenny is beside himself, too. You’re sure you’ve overheard him referring to one of the kittens as Lenny Junior. 

Of course, the kittens have multiple names as everyone has their own ideas on what they should be called. You do let Jack name one in the end of course, a tiny grey tabby who he calls Merlin. 

Susan fusses and scolds away as you’d expect, especially when the kittens use various items as a toilet (an empty cooking pot, some freshly washed linen, Strauss’s ledger, Bill’s hat, ect.) 

But she has such a soft spot for cats, and can often be found scooping them up and cooing at them when she thinks no one can see her. 

Karen and Tilly think they’re cute and all, but most of their time is spent trying to convince Mary-Beth not to go out and get more pets. 

Molly finds the kittens very therapeutic and comforting, much like Arthur. She gently pets them, letting them sleep on her shawls. When she’s feeling especially low, she’ll often end up weeping gently into their fur. They don’t seem to mind. 

Despite the use of his ledger as a makeshift toilet, Strauss also betrays his love of cats by always coming home from his errands with various treats from the local butchers. The gang can’t believe how often he smiles these days. 

Mama cat often curls up on Swanson’s lap when he’s passed out from drinking. It’s almost like she’s protecting him. 

Sadie decides that as long as the kittens grow up to be able to hunt for themselves, she’s got no quarrel with them. She feels a certain solidarity with Mama cat. 

John, Bill and Sean are decidedly not cat people whatsoever. Sean is actually petrified of cats and it takes Karen gently placing one of the kittens on his knee (he was sweating from the pressure) and guiding his hand to pet it to get him to calm down. 

John sees cats as pointless - “at least dogs can work!” - but the joy they bring to Jack and Abigail softens his view somewhat. 

One of the kittens, the only male, has an unusual fur pattern, with a tiny smudge of black just under his nose that looks a lot like a moustache. Of course, you name him Dutch.  

#anonymous #request #headcanon #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #van der linde gang #long post

[joesbbqandfootmassage]

Jane and Carlos in D3:

A Thanksgiving Feast

So I have already made my obligatory Janelos defense post that every blog on this website owes them, and I will link that here.

But I kind of barely touched on just how good they are in D3. Like, insanely good.

Devie and Janelos are the God tier Descendants ships and somebody had to say it.

It figures that Disney would choose to focus on the basic dynamic that is Bal even though they have two amazing VK/AK pairings to work with.

I ain’t saying they needed to kick Ben and Mal from the series because I do still think they’re cute, I’m just saying that Devie and Janelos also deserved their own Enchanted Lake First Date Scene.

Now in D2 both ships were given roughly three major scenes to work with and then of course all of their background dance scenes in You and Me.

Both Janelos and Devie doing different variations of the hug and spin number. (Holy fluff the Devie one was fantastic)

And they both had pretty good character arcs as well.

While Bal pretty much have the same character arc every movie, Janelos and Devie approach one thing at a time. In D2 that was Evie reaffirming to Doug that she wants him, not a stereotypical prince. Strengthening their relationship.

Meanwhile Janelos was giving both Carlos and Jane the chance to step out of their bubbles and explore this new sensation called love.

And you can really believe the time that has passed between these relationships when D3 finally rolls around.

Naturally Jane and Carlos are a touchy-feely kind of couple, linking arms and wrapping arms around shoulders and a lot of background hugs that were cut from the film.

Normally this would probably annoy me, but in this case it makes sense for Carlos and Jane because of his touch starvation.

Jane is able to hold onto him like it's just something normal for her to do with him, unlike any person on the Isle ever.

So in D3 you can see how comfortable they are with one another and just with affection in general.

But that's not all D3 has to offer for them, oh no.

Because D3 is also the movie where Carlos' evolution to Hero of the Isle is the most evident.

It's something you can finally see in every little action.

I'm gonna be honest, D3 should have been Evie's movie.

My sister and I pointed this out as we read all of the VK's posters and saw that Mal's had her’s as, "The Liberator."

To which we both went, "That is a bunch of fluffing BS."

Because everybody knows that it was EVIE'S idea to start transferring kids over to the Isle.

I can't even imagine how many meetings she had to attend, presentations she had to give and trouble she had to deal with from the higher ups.

Because D3 is when they are finally able to bring Dizzy over to Auradon and they've already graduated high school at this point.

And yet, Mal gets the praise.

Mal gets the credit.

And when they encounter their first bump in the road, it's Mal who shuts down the program. Destroying all of Evie's hard work.

While it’s not an official term used, I’ve been calling Carlos, Evie and Uma all “Heroes of the Isle.” Mainly because most, if not all, of their most prominent actions in the films (when actually given any) have been for the sake of the Isle and the children they wish to protect and save.

And it can switch from Heroes of the Isle to Heroes from the Isle, mostly depending on what stance my argument has.

This stance being tilted toward Janelos, though I will probably post another rant talking about how Evie should have been the main character of D3.

Now this is the first time we see Carlos actively having someone to protect since Dude in D1, the second he returns to Auradon from the Isle he calls Jane several times. He then spends a good deal of the movie before Jane comes back being mopey. Which is something you notice if you watch a movie three times in a row and those two other times all you do is look at Carlos.

It’s an interesting thought to have in your head, Carlos - A Protector. 

While interesting, it never surprised me.

You can see a lot of his protectiveness in D2 when they return to the Isle, with him usually being the first one to charge.

And it only took me so long to notice that because I’ve had an image of Carlos built in my head.

Nothing can ruin your outlook of a character faster than the fandom’s perception of them.

If you listened to all the people going on and on about how Shaggy from Scooby-Doo is clearly coded to be a stoner, you might miss that he was a star gymnast and a pro-golfer. How many of y’all knew that Daphne was a straight A student?

The Descendants’ fandom has usually painted Carlos as the obligatory, “Smol bean, too precious for this world. Must protecc.”

Which is fine, if the character is clearly supposed to be interpreted as those things.

Carlos, while definitely too good for both the Isle and Auradon, is not a weak and helpless character. Sure he’s soft spoken and really really nice, like omg there is no way him and Cruella share the same DNA, but he also did really well in tourney and fencing.

He’s perceptive and quick to adapt.

And on top of all of that, he’s hurt.

So many years of being a doormat on the Isle, not only for his mother but every other person that looked down on him.

Despite all of that, he still cares about people.

He still has so much love to give to people he knows need it.

And in D3, Carlos seems to finally know who he is when separated from the VK or AK title.

He wants to help VKs transfer onto Auradon.

He wants a place to house lost boys and girls who were like him, no safe place to go.

He wants to be a vet.

And he wants to love Jane.

When he reunites with Jane in the second act of the movie, you can see that it’s not just Carlos that feels this way.

Once again, just like in D2, Jane fully reciprocates all of his feelings maybe even more so with the way she always renders his breathless every time.

Jane and Carlos give and receive love with no counter or limit in sight, they snuggle and hug and just... touch.

They make promises to stay safe, to keep each other safe, to stay together.

Always surprising the other with the reminder that they do indeed love each other.

Because they were two lonely kids that needed to love and be loved.

And the trilogy ends giving both of them exactly that.

And this is all just whatever I can glean from the movies.

When Amazon finally decides to send me all of the books it’s over for you hoes.

#Believe it of not #i still have plenty of things to say about carlos and janelos #but i just really needed to cover the importance of them in d3 because it was keeping me up at night #i also have a lot to say about evie because i adore her almost as much as i adore jane and carlos #so hopefully i get around to writing an evie post #descendants #descendant 3 #carlos de vil #jane daughter of fairy godmother #janelos #jane x carlos