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velvet-games · 24 days

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I finally finished the piece for @prince-liest's OC, Tzafael! this really reminded me of how fun character design is (and also that I've completely forgotten how to make digital art, but that's besides the point...) <3

credit to @hogbogglerspirits for the umbrella design! I kind of butchered it so please look at the original and throw lots of love at them

LOTS of notes, draft sketches, brainstorming, etc. below the cut. enjoy!

(note: a lot of what I'm talking about is based on posts prince made under their #tzafael tag, so take a look at those if you haven't yet!)

thanks for joining me below the cut! here's the sketch without the colors as a treat (in case you want to color it yourself or something, idk).

notes about making the digital drawing:

holy shit this took me forever -- I was not kidding about forgetting how to make digital art lmao. I forgot how much less forgiving digital lines are and genuinely lost the spoons to even attempt lineart, hence just a sketch below the colors.

some of you might've seen the original sketch I sent to prince, which the digital version diverges from just a little. it's mostly the halo which I'll explain later, and I finally caved and drew the sixth eye (you can tell I drew and erased it multiple times in the sketch lmao -- still don't know if I prefer it with or without)

here's the original color ref by the lovely @gendermeh! my color scheme ended up looking really different, so some notes about that:

I was looking at references for magpies like this

and I wanted to basically follow that color scheme while also being somewhat similar to the original -- dark head/shoulders --> dark top of the jacket, bright blue wings --> bright blue bottom of the jacket, greenish tailfeathers --> green pants, hints of purple --> purplish sleeve and pant ends

I also tried (and mostly failed, let's be real) to capture the iridescence of the feathers -- they look like oil spilled on the pavement or iridescent hematite to me! I think the key ended up being adding bright greens/purples and roughly blending them into the blues or vice versa but I didn't really figure that out until I got to the pants lol.

I'm gonna be honest; I don't remember why I went with this shape for the tailcoat. I just remember being unhappy with the sketch and then trying a bunch of different shapes that mostly looked worse lol -- I think I landed on this because a split tail kind of looks like wings?

KEPT the shoes -- absolutely magnifique. I wish I knew how to color gold better.

added lots of jewelry! they like shiny things :)

ALSO PLEASE LOOK AND APPLAUD ME. I FINALLY REMEMBERED TO LABEL MY LAYERS!! NO I DON'T REMEMBER WHY THE HALO HAS ITS OWN LAYER.

alright, time for some more design notes/explanations + draft sketches!

but first, a couple disclaimers:

I want to make it very clear that I LOVE everything about the original design. I made a lot of changes based on personal preference/the way I interpreted the character. I was actually planning on making a digital piece that was more faithful to the original design too, but I was just out of spoons for it cause of life stuff.

you probably shouldn't try to read the notes I made in the sketches I'm about to show you unless I say otherwise. most of it is incoherent brain vomit in illegible artist handwriting and I'll transcribe/explain the stuff I think is important :) (the stuff in quotes are direct transcriptions of my notes)

I know my sketches are very messy lol. I only draw for fun, so I usually don't force myself to make stuff any neater than necessary unless it's supposed to be a formal piece. try to bear with me.

my first few sketches of them! (I think?) this was before I sent prince a laundry list of questions so I was still trying to get a vibe

"magpie -- beak lips?" -- you'll see this in a few sketches; I considered giving them the lipstick design that velvette has since it looks like a beak. I still kind of think it's cute, but 1) I'm pretty sure velvette is the only character that has them, so I didn't want to make it seem like they were related somehow and 2) I thought it might be distracting with how much other crazy stuff I ended up including in their head/face

also, sidenote since it's relevant to what I said about vel: something I realized was important is how one character's design relates to the designs of the rest of the cast. I wasn't sure how much I should've gone for what looked good in a vacuum, how much should be based on what other characters looked like canonically, or what other characters would look like if I also designed them. it ended up being mostly the second option, but it was honestly still a struggle. should I take away some of the tumblr-sexyman-ness (no shade to tumblr sexymen; I love them) because there are other characters that already have it? should I relate their design to sera's and emily's in the show or should I think about how I would've designed sera and emily? should I follow some of the design philosophy of the original show and just throw stuff on there because it looks cool (the answer is yes btw)? decisions, decisions ...

I don't think this showed up really well in most of the drawings, but they actually have a black line down their nose! let's take a look at sera:

since they're siblings, I wanted to include some similar facial markings. the nose line ended up being the only thing I kept though -- I was going to include freckles, but I have a compulsive need to give every character giant bottom lashes so there ended up being no room T.T I like that the magpie's hints of purple kind of match hers tho!

the wingification of the hair begins! I was still unsure of it at this point, but it was an idea I had since I was kind of struggling with how straight the feathers were in the original.

"maybe the ones on their head count as wings (so only one main pair)" -- I originally just had the 2 pairs of wings on their head, so I was thinking of just giving them 1 pair on their back so there would be still be 6 total. also this middle drawing of them is meant to be their exorcist outfit (I wanted it to be a cross between what the other exorcists wear and sera's outfit)

at this stage, I was thinking of giving them more magpie-like characteristics, so I looked at some references and tried to emulate them in a more human design. this ended up being really awkward so I scrapped it, but I still like the idea that their exorcist mask looks like a bird (kind of like a plague doctor's)

peekaboo! I love the idea of them using the wing hair to cover their eyes lol. (ended up using that idea for my own seraph OC since that's their biblically accurate purpose: to cover their eyes/faces in reverence/humility -- doesn't really fit with tzafael tho lol, so they show their face most of the time)

an eyeball in the bowtie -- pretty self-explanatory. the eyeball motif is important.

the one in the middle is just me practicing drawing the original design, and the one on the right is another exorcist outfit I think. I wanted to include the diamond motif/points that sera has on her dress (the diamonds on the bottom turn into eyeballs, which is why the final design also has eyeballs on tzafael's sleeves/pants)

lots of notes on the side based on what prince said in response to my ask

"localized omniscience (power of sight) -- cool + ironic that their sight was supposed to serve God but made them see Heaven for what it really is instead"

another exorcist outfit, this time including the feathers

I was also experimenting with the halo; I was trying to make it look sort of like sera's crown, but that didn't feel right ...

some practice with eyes -- my style is pretty flexible with eye shapes, so I try to make them suit the character. I drew lute's eye and also an actual magpie's as references -- lute's because of the exorcist background and also because they looked appropriately sharp, magpie's for obvious reasons. once again, my compulsive need for giant bottom lashes strikes

there was honestly a lot to balance with the eyes -- I wanted them to look condescending/bored (lowered top lid) but also amused (raised bottom lid) and like a magpie (round) but also harsh/mischievous (sharp, maybe slit pupils like a snake) and similar to sera's (but not too decorated -- also does it make sense for them to look like sera's if emily's don't even look like sera's?)

considered having wings on the shoulders -- the magpie pattern is super cool, so it would've been nice to have that somewhere more explicitly in the design. I still think that might fit in an outfit they would wear in heaven (maybe for formal occasions)

the introduction of the sweatervest! honestly I kind of love this for the way it captures more of the preppy, spoiled old-money upper-class vibe some heaven residents have, but it was scrapped since I couldn't imagine them wearing that while trying to scare the denizens of hell. maybe something they wear casually though.

"yes nictating membrane (on every eye!)" -- AHH I'm so sad I didn't end up putting this to use. I just feel like the whole effect is based on actually seeing them blink, and I don't animate lol.

ugh, the nefarious laughter one ... don't worry I tried harder on a sketch later on lol.

"like the diamonds on Sera + Em" + "diamonds turn into eyes?" -- I draw the diamonds on the sweatervest turning into eyes later.

tried an actual bow instead of a bowtie -- very cute but didn't fit the vibe.

a skirt! I think they would wear a skirt sometimes.

"FUCK ASS BOB" -- asghdk the wingification of the hair continues. unfortunately, I'm realizing at this point that the silhouette of the hair is starting to look a lot like alastor's. I gave a very half-hearted attempt at mitigating this, but it goes back to the thing of how much I am obligated to the original show's designs and what looks cool to me -- I think the wing hair fits them and I didn't want to change it because of alastor, plus my alastor design actually has completely different hair anyway. I did add a third pair to the back to look like a ponytail though.

introduction of the scarf! I was actually going to include this in the final design but uh,,, I forgor. are you starting to see a pattern.

the reason for the scarf is that the "tzafael going to places they know they'll draw attention/can incite chaos" reminded me of that scene in avengers where loki walks into a fancy building looking pretentious af and just casually stabs a guy's eye out. not really the same thing but I felt like the vibe matched. hence, loki's funny little scarf fit.

uaoughdfjh it was SO FUN to draw the wing hair, and it was at this point that I realized they had to stay even though I wasn't sure if it was too different from the original.

gossiping with rosie cause that's the first person I thought of -- tzafael also summoned a pearl necklace to clutch because of the sheer drama of it all (your ex-husband did what??)

also started drawing the rings on their hands. magpie like shiny.

lots of notes cause I was trying to compile the things I still needed to think about/incorporate into the final (I thought this was gonna be the last draft ... haha)

trying to include more bird/eye motifs

"fish ... purse?" -- ha! I forgot I was gonna give them a fish purse. I think I drew that in a later sketch, but not them wearing it.

"picked up Hellish traits bc of extended stay -- existential crisis?" -- I asked prince about the sharp teeth, and their answer implied that they became sharp as they stayed in hell longer, which got me thinking ... I feel like that's actually a great body horror concept. lucifer falling and looking like a normal angel at first, eventually waking up to more and more devilish features and feeling more and more like he's lost his home and his past self ... spooky.

another exorcist outfit -- I actually really like the eyes on the ribs! I never made a final draft for the exorcist uniform, but it would probably look close to what I drew here.

the one on the bottom was meant to be similar to the feathered shoulder pad idea, but this time with the whole magpie (with giant eyes). tried putting the "freckles" (really just dots in this case) over their brows, but that ended up looking kinda weird.

the eye is pretty close to the final design

the one on the right was supposed to be the full final design, but I was totally off lol -- the long trench coat really doesn't give off the right vibe at all

playing around more with the loki vibes of the scarf, also added an eyeball to the chest

I never got happy with the design of the back of the coat -- I think it should probably just be blank at this point. but the sketch here is meant to look like wings/tailfeathers.

yet another exorcist outfit, this time with more magpie motifs. I actually like this one a lot, but I probably should've added the eyes on the ribs from the last sketch. I think I also considered giving them actual tailfeathers at this point.

thanks for sticking with me! I promise we're almost done. have a trans dinosaur I saw while I was travelling as a treat <3

10:

this is after I finished the sketch for the final piece and realized I didn't like the halo design. I drew lute's, sera's, em's, and adam's as refs. (honestly I love the show's idea that each person/people of each rank have a different kind of halo -- I wonder if they can switch them out?)

my main inspiration ended up being the exorcist halo, but I made it look more like an eyeball -- since it always points toward heaven, we can say it's always "looking" at heaven.

(also sera's feather lashes! they're so cute)

11:

EVEN MORE EXORCIST DOODLES

12:

tzafael shooing away my fox demon OC

13:

these are actually sketches for my own seraph OC (raguel), but I wanted to include it since it has even more wing/feather hair variations. I also think the idea of the eyelashes being feather-like could've been cool for tzafael.

14:

some more OG design doodles

tzafael and raguel together because self-indulgence is the name of the game babey (also wanted to draw tzafael freaked out with their wings flared)

(raguel's blind btw, hence asking for eyes -- tzafael has so many!)

you can probably read the dialogue here so give it a shot. I believe in you.

15:

you know what? the fish purse deserves some doodles

16:

putting them in Situations! I was reading over prince's posts again and I realized there were some funny things I could draw them doing/saying

again you can probably read the words here

angel dust also loves fish (but is apparently bad at taking care of them, hence the suffocating blobfish), so tzafael shows him their aquarium (complete with live fish and flora ofc)

I thought alastor was 8 ft but apparently he's 7.3 ft? so tzafael is enjoying the .2 ft they have on him

trying and failing again to come up with a design for the back of the jacket lol

THE crowley quote

apparently the halo still sends signals from the exorcists -- thought their reaction to the battle at the hotel would be funny

the nefarious laughter (take 2) that I promised -- based on a doodle of alastor viv did that I found

them being sad and curling up in a pile of shiny things like a dragon

OKAY I'M DONE. huge, huge thank you to prince for sharing their OC! this was a lot of fun and clearly inspired me a lot haha. please check out their writing; it's literally so good that I can't read anything else these days. I am chewing on their thoughts constantly.

this was an absolute monster of a post, so if you're still reading, I am both impressed and bewildered at your patience. I hope you enjoyed! (I certainly did!)

#prince (because they are very sweet): I'm excited to see your thoughts!#my thoughts: magpie like shiny hehe #hazbin hotel oc #prince-liest #hazbin hotel #my art #character design #sera hazbin hotel #em hazbin hotel

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its-short-for-jackalope · 1 year

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greetings! i have made a thing! ✨️two✨️ things!

✨️ sketchboooooooooooks! ✨️

it took longer than anticipated (I've been trying to get this done since the end of last year, oops) but I finally finished putting these together today. all that's left to do is decorate the covers and start drawing in 'em!

they are slightly–moderately wonky and pretty clearly handmade, but I love them. gives em charm. these are only the second and third books I've made myself so I'm still learning.

if you're interested I'll drop a few more photos and babble a little about the process under the cut! (definitely not a tutorial if that's what you're hoping for lol i was winging it the whole time)

okay so we'll start with the little guy. this is meant to be more of a travel sketchbook.

I wanted something fairly small that I could take on the go without it being too much of a hassle, because I'm also hoping to get out more and like... go for walks to the park or the cemetery or w/e and try doing some studies and life drawing and such. or just get some fresh air and doodle while I make a valiant attempt to get some vitamin D.

THE PROCESS

both sketchbooks are made out of materials I just had lying around, but this one is even more "recycled" lmao

i took the inside pages from an old sketchbook, and about half of them had previously been used, so I went and erased my old sketches as much as I could (they were bad and low effort, so it's no loss I assure you) and that was a boring and frustrating endeavor but it was worth it because, well, I get to use the paper again! I did a very poor job the first time around, I almost never drew on both sides of the page and so many pages were just one shitty sketch and nothing else 🙈

i sorted the pages into signatures (tried to mix up the used and new paper because it'd annoy me if I had just like one big chunk of ghost drawings and then the rest of the book was good and clean lol) and stitched those together and then put just a couple layers of glue on the spine to hold it together.

I made the cover by gluing two pieces of thin cardboard together for each part (front cover, back cover, spine) to make em sturdier, and then I trimmed them down to size and glued the pieces to a paper shopping bag. I didn't have the patience to try flattening the cover under a heavy book or anything, so it's a little warped and will kind of open up on its own so I'm just using the binder clip to hold it closed. plus idk it looks cool!

once the cover was done and dry I just... glued it all together! added the end pages i cut out of construction paper to the.. chunk of book? the book brick? (is there a technical word for it when the signatures are all together....?) and then glued the other sides of the end pages to the inside covers.

now for the second book! the big boy!

this fella was intended to be the grand, improved follow-up to the first sketchbook I put together, and I started working on it right when said first book started running out of paper.

this one is the wonkier of the two but I think it's definitely a few steps up from the original, and I'm pleased with it. this is gonna be my everyday sketchbook, so I wanted it to have a ton of pages so I can use it for a good long while. I think it's at least twice as thick as my first sketchbook. 😂

THE PROCESS

...basically the same as the travel sketchbook, just bigger! the pages are sourced from a different sketchbook, one I started using in high school and promptly forgot about upon graduation.

fun fact: the end pages are covered in countless tiny little hatch lines that i drew by hand while I watched/listened to something on my computer. I don't quite remember what I was watching at this point, but it was almost certainly something from Starkid... probably VHSCC on repeat, since I did this part back in november/december. it might sound tedious but I shit you not I was thrilled to do this part and it was just a blissful neurodivergent turn the brain off and vibe kind of time.

the biggest difference in this process was doing the cover; it's not cardboard, it's some kind of particle board.. thing that was salvaged from the back of a busted picture frame. it is VERY stiff and sturdy and I did not cut the pieces out so much as score the board with my box cutter as deeply as I could, bend it back and forth, and pray it didn't break. 😅 the cover-cover is from the same bag I used on the smaller book!

most of the wonkiness comes from the fact that the cover is sliiiiiiiightly too small for the book brick inside. I had limited material for the cover so I couldn't stretch that at all, I made the cover as big as I possibly could, but I also did not feel like trimming the inside pages so that they would fit better because that would have taken FOREVER and also probably killed me. 😫 soooo the pages stick out a little bit, but that's fine and it doesn't bother me much. 🤷🏻‍♂️

and that's my two sketchbooks! finished em both up over 3 days after procrastinating for at least a month. and now that they exist I can finally draw again!!! been wanting to do that for WEEKS.

if you read all of this I hope you got something out of it, lol. whether you did or didnt, here's a skull for your troubles.

😊🤲🏻💀

enjoy!! <3

#jack jabbers #sketchbook #handmade sketchbook #crafting #crafty #bookmaking #book binding #crafter

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mcrmadness · 3 years

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Rambling about my (dä fan)art...

I was writing another post and this kinda got out of hand and turned into me talking about my art overall. I’m gonna put this under the cut because I don’t know if people are interested in my art nor especially in my thought about it and my “art history” basically, but if you are, then I hope you enjoy.

And yes, this is gonna be about my die ärzte fanart mainly!

So let’s start with the HELL coverart drawing because that’s what I was talking about originally:

I’m extremely happy with how the drawing turned out in the end and I like that feeling of success when I’m happy with something I have created. That is not always self-evident with myself. More than often I have plain hated my drawings or have felt like there should be something done differently, or something that I could always improve at and do better. So this feeling where I’m actually content and happy with what I have created is something new and different. I have a dopamine rush every time I look at that drawing. I like the drawing. I think it looks nice. And I’m extremely happy about this fact and I am not afraid of admitting it. Perfectionism is a curse and a gift. It can sometimes make your life a living hell when something that is perfectly good still feels like it’s not enough. When everyone else sees that what you have done is actually good or even great but your brain just keeps repeating how it’s shit and everyone else is just delusional and that they don’t see what you see. And this is like the polar opposite of that feeling. It wasn’t other people who were delusional, it was you and youself all along. You were the one seeing the image in your head and the drawing not matching that image. Other people saw only what you had created and couldn’t compare it to anything. And that doesn’t mean it was never good.

So whenever I do these comics and comic style drawings nowadays, I just feel so happy. I feel that I am no longer failing them, I feel like I can draw the image I see in my head. I finally feel like I can draw, I have some skills, I’m not a professional and maybe not as good as everyone else but I’m good at what I’m doing. This is my thing and I’m good at it and it’s enough. And I love it when I feel like I’m improving. For years I felt like I was stuck, like my skills would have been glitching somehow, I didn’t get better no matter how much I drew. But I guess I tried too much and was too harsh on myself because I believed that a drawing is good only when no reference photos have been used. And I sucked at drawing without them. I still do! I was staring at the Hell coverart the whole time I was drawing! I wouldn’t have been able to do this if I didn’t! And this feels particularly good also because this is the first time I have tried something different with these comics. I have never tried to draw a photo or existing picture with this style. I have only drawn my comics and those I have created all by myself. The clothes come from what I have seen in videos and photos but the plots are created by me alone, with a idea coming from somewhere actual usually, as inspirations do.

For comics I do look at reference photos of people sitting or standing, or I look at the mirror, or even take photos of my own hand to be able to draw something. And that’s lots of fun and also challenging because I’m mixing there my old habit of portrait drawing with my less serious comic book style but I really really do like the combination. It also makes me feel that I am memorizing what I draw and the next time when I need to draw that same posture, I no longer need the reference photos because they’re no in my brain. And in my muscle memory. My hand remembers how to do the lines now.

Here you can see one of the sketches I did in 2018 - I had this image in my head and I wanted to draw it and I just... drew it in my sketchbook. Didn’t use pencil. But now I’ve noticed I like doing these on proper paper instead of the sketchbook AND it’s so much more fun to first draw the sketch with the pencil and then draw on it with the fineliners. That I have always done with the comics (apart from one) because they take more time than these quick sketches. But here you can see Farin’s legs on the first image - I think I might have looked at reference photos for that but then it was so much easier to do the to the comic I made in 2019.

I have now also figured out that a big part of my style is not to draw just simple straight lines. I like making those sketch-like lines even with the marker. They look more rough but that’s something I like seeing with my art. That’s what I was missing when I was staring at the lines I had drawn before and hated every detail of them. They were too clean and neat.

^These two I have also drawn on my sketchbook in 2018 and I don’t really know why. I guess I was still a bit stupid and didn’t really realize I’m drawing again. But anyway, they both were inspired by my own fanfiction I have written a long time ago. It’s one of my favorite self-written fanfics and it had these two scenes I just saw in my head and felt like I could try drawing them. Maybe that’s why they are in my sketchbook, I wasn’t sure if they were going to turn out even good... The marker around the second one obviously was shit and the paper wasn’t good for it, and I never finished with it so it looks a bit weird. Do I need to say that I really enjoy drawing very small, repetative details, like those tiles? It’s so soothing, almost like a therapy.

I think that quitting antidepressants in 2013 has done so much good for my creativity. If you compare my work from 2011 to 2019, the difference is huge - all are just parts from my comics:

Can you guess see the difference? But have to admit I am jealous for myself for how I have drawn Farin’s hair to the 2011 one and maybe have forgotten to color Farin’s arm but... I actually had so long pause from drwing (~8 years) that I forgot how I did that and had to use THAT as a reference when I was trying to draw late 80s Farin’s at some point last or this year :D

Anyway, my style with the shadows is a little different when I use colored pencils than when I use markers. This is from my latest comic from this year, where I experimented with Promarkers the way I had never done before and I really like how it came to be:

I have owned this set of Promarkers (black + 5 greys) for years and have never really used them, apart from the black which I usually used for the thick lines anyway. And wanted to see if I could find some use for the greys too! (Yes that’s Bela back there - this comic was an alternative ending for Für Immer music video :D)

And I wanna end this post with a face progress comparison for all three. During this I also noticed that before I used to draw their side profiles and it was really difficult to find images where I’d have drawn from from the front. And nowadays I have mainly drawn them from the front and it’s hard to find side profiles! Interesting! Here’s one of Farin and Bela from a drawing I made this year:

Also the hand that was so much fun to draw but I also took photos of my own hand in that posture in order to even draw that - that was fun! :D

But here are the last three images - using the HELL one as the last for each, of course:

Bela has always been the easiest to draw. And the first one of these three is actually from my first ever Bela&Farin comic! I didn’t color their skin back then. With the next ones I already did color their skins too but I used darker colors to do the shadows. Nowadays I do the shadows with fineliners. Or it depends - that 2019 one doesn’t have that lol.

Damn it was so difficult to find something where I’d have draw Farin from the front :D And I see the HELL one literally is my second (or third) time drawing Farin with his grin. Or if you count all those numerous extra mouths I drew because I failed the first one, then I have drawn his grin at least 15 times by now. I probably can draw his teeth with no reference photos from now on.

I haven’t drawn Rod too many times. I can actually count about... 5 times? And then there’s only 2 times when I’ve drawn his side profile but he’s at the background. I don’t know if I’ve ever really succeeded at that, I usually try to draw his head a more round and his eyes smaller than for Bela and Farin and I was actually bit worried for the HELL one and was wondering if I’m going to ruin the whole thing. But in fact, that was actually easiest of them to draw. And STILL I’m surprised by how alike he looks in that last one. In fact, I think his dacial features are perfect for a carricature drawing so you don’t need to do more than a few lines for the mouth and it looks like his mouth. The middle one was for a drawing I made for a friend and with this I actually looked at photos so that I could draw some of his hairstyles from the 90s and I liked this one the best and it was also quite easy to draw too.

Do I even have to say that I’m not extremely motivated what comes to drawing? I feel like my creative has become what it has never been before. I still don’t really know what to draw but I just feel that whatever it is I’ll start next, it will be good. And if it doesn’t... who cares? I had so much fun with those extra mouths of Farin which was maybe visible from the video I filmed, and that is what makes drawing worth it. Before I took the drawing process so seriously and a mistake felt like the end of the world but now I laugh at them and make fun of them and don’t take them too seriously. And I always have ways to fix these, or I can redraw. Just like I did with Farin’s mouth (or a half of his face actually) for this newest drawing. The most important thing is that I’m having fun and enjoying what I do, that way usually the outcome will also be a success.

I have now at least 2 dä comics on my to-do list (I don’t remember if there’s a third one too) + one pencil drawing that is halfway there. It will take one more night/day for it to get it finished. I also have probably 5 ideas for self-comics etc. in my sketchbook and I try to find some time to work on those. Or actually I have a plenty of time. Adhd, time blindness and executive dysfunction just make it feel as if I didn’t :D Can’t wait to get working on my next drawing projects, tho!

(I wish I knew how to make art for a living even but that’s a topic that will need its own post which I’m probably do in a near future if I don’t forget :D)

#mcrmadness’ art talk #mcrmadness draws #the post has lots of text but also quite a many images #dä fanart #die ärzte #I have been drawing dä comics since 2010 - the old ones are very stupid but whatever :D #long post

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edda-blattfe · 4 years

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Edda-Blattfe Art Index (oldest to new)

Because stuff gets lost in the endless void.

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187174557398/finally-finished-my-ne-avatar-pic-thought-i-might https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187253060608/a-really-rough-image-of-young-maleus-and-lilia https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187316772608/so-yeah-blue-works https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187435487128/pretty-anime-boy-exists-no-one-me https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187527869408/found-the-twisted-wonderland-dorm-quiz-on-quotev https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187893450793/todays-mood-brought-to-you-by-burrito-blanket https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/187952693733/twistedwonderlandimagines-and-i-were-joking

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188101841533/friend-mirrorsonas https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188258990433/a-really-rough-sketch-of-rook-in-his-archery

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188392001508/me-ok-fun-times-over-i-gotta-get-to-work-on

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188109429898/got-inspired-by-poisonepel-s-tw-villain-x

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188217045563/digital-sketch-of-twisted-nala-i-didnt-like-how https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188456599583/enlarge-for-better-definition-decided-to

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188503180518/a-quick-sketch-of-tanner-bellman-twisted-tinker

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188577957788/happy-birthday-sienna https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188625370848/let-me-introduce-yall-to-pennly-oak-twisted

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189008227273/ok-im-calling-it-quits-now-hope-yall-enjoy-the

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188692668053/one-of-my-family-members-made-a-comment-about

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188716370223/happy-halloween https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188799402108/an-early-christmas-present-for-no-luck-styn

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/188884201113/what-if-fae-eyes-dilate-similarly-to-a-cats https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189137460563/finally-did-artwork-of-tanner-its-a-little https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189171043898/ahi-remember-you-reblogging-my-post-where-i

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189224144433/no-rhyme-or-reason-i-just-wanted-to-draw-blue-in https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189274317463/finished-the-initial-sketches-of-the-diasomnia https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189327759818/and-then-oiseaunoir11-octavinelle-mafia

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189376503538/no-shading-no-highlights-and-the-line-art-isnt

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189377069863/made-the-mistake-of-drawing-the-sawsbuck-trainer https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189403785863/octavinelle-mafia-said-she-shipped-blue-with https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189555053663/went-ahead-and-did-a-more-detailed-version-of https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189669427058/best-of-this-semesters-art-class-just-thought-i

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189835689093/drawwrite-oc-in-opposite-dormclass-challenge

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/189858728918/hate-it-when-you-have-stuff-to-work-on-but-you

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190183479093/my-sixth-victim-i-will-make-you-a-persian-cat

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190418034538/sorry-for-not-posting-anything-written-needed-a https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190544213753/pictures-im-not-gonna-finish-but-want-to-share https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190597669588/it-is-finished https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190640029498/rook-is-blond-and-blue-iswell-blue-would https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190669009033/almost-forgot-to-show-the-artwork-oops

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190695765348/i-dont-want-a-prince-or-a-boyfriend-i-just-want

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190732303888/me-time-for-slep-brain-i-hear-you-i-hear

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/190750347663/of-course-i-had-to-immediately-draw-lil-chibi-blue

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/612271240448737280/prompt-yue-was-in-her-spring-kimono-and-went-to

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/612878432913768448/was-practicing-drawing-the-original-blue-fairy-and

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/613281072977985536/i-give-up-hope-yall-enjoy-the-finished-version

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/613356406384525312/have-i-ever-mentioned-how-much-i-hate-doing

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/613981636988665856/overblot-blue

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/614076981455273984/we-have-twisted-simba-and-mufasa-all-were

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/614224901973426176/it-is-week-three-of-social-distancing-i-have

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/614545912976539648/cleaning-out-art-folder

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/614626616865374208/new-student-oc-niel-maris

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/615796292847894528/hello-sensei-bows-politely-i-brought-a-special

https://edda-blattfe.tumblr.com/post/615941938605064192/your-first-drawing-challenge

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland oc #art index #my art #master post #edda blattfe

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munsonthings86 · 6 years

Text

Journal Entry- (Grayson Dolan x Reader)

Summary: [Y/N] [Y/L/N]. She and I had been the closest pair of friends just about our whole lives. We had such a tight bond where it distinctly felt like we had an invisible force field protecting our relationship from ever faltering, that only we could see. You may have a question dancing around your mind along the lines of, “So why are we here? What could have possibly gone wrong?” You, my friend, are about to see just how unfair the universe is, when it comes to relationships like these.

Warnings: Cursing, angst, fluff, just an emotional rollercoaster like wow. And it’s long, but long imagines are good right?

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy this imagine, I really love it, and I’m proud of it and I hope you all love it just as much! Love you guys!

Word Count: 3,081

[Grayson’s POV]

“Yes, this is him,” I spoke into the phone with a rather raspy voice, addressing the talent agent that called contacted me, so early in the morning. I listened closely to the offer that was seemingly important, as my eyes increasingly lit up at the older woman’s words. “Are you kidding? That’s sounds awesome,” I exclaimed already thinking of accepting the proposition without even consulting my twin brother, Ethan.

“So, when would we have to leave?” I question, quickly realizing that this kind of opportunity wouldn’t allow for us to remain here in New Jersey. “Wow, really? I’ll have to talk to Ethan, of course, before I make any promises. So I’ll call you back soon,” I respond, feeling excited yet worried about what Ethan would have to say.

I end the phone call and wander around the house, looking for my brother that would ultimately determine the general decision of whether we would be taking up the career changing offer or not. Finally spotting him in his bedroom scrolling away at his phone, he looks up at me upon my entrance that I made without knocking.

“Did I say you could come in?,” he sarcastically asks, dropping his phone beside him. “Shut up and listen, this is serious,” I retort, pushing the blankets to the corner of the bed, to make room for myself to sit.

“First of all, you come into my bedroom, WITHOUT knocking, then you tell me to shut up-”

“Okay, be quiet. We have a movie offer, Ethan. Yeah, a movie offer. This could change everything!,” I exclaimed, understandably ecstatic at the news. I watch as Ethan’s features morph into a shocked yet taken aback expression.

“Dude, that’s insane! We get the chance to be in a movie and we get to stay in Jersey? This is perfect for us,” he says, playfully pushing my shoulder. My face soon falls into a frown as I notice that I left out a vital detail in my report to Ethan. “About that,” I begin, fumbling with my fingers. “We have to move out to Los Angeles if we wanna be a part of the production.”

“What? We have to move to L.A.? That’s across the whole freaking country. When do they expect us to leave?,” Ethan asks, with a panic-struck look sketched across his face. “They want us to move out there as soon as possible. The latest being next month-”

“Next month? A whole fucking movie deal, and they call us a month before it’s time to start getting shit in order? We’ve never gone so far away from here before. What about Mom and Dad? And Cameron?-”

“And Nolan?,” I interrupt, pushing forth my best effort to lighten and add humor to the situation.

“Dude, this isn’t funny.” Ethan pauses, before widen his eyes as if he’s just had a fascinating realization. “Have you even told [Y/N], yet?”

My eyes widen, mimicking Ethan’s own, as the rest of my actions get held at a stand-still at the mention of her name. This whole time, I had been so captivated in the exhilaration of potentially being a part of something so major, that I had completely forgotten about my best friend, [Y/N].

If I left her, not only would she be heart broken, but so would I. She was the very first friend Ethan and I made. She’s an immense part of me that is going be hard to let go of once we- if we leave for L.A.

“Holy shit, I haven’t even talked to her since I got the call. E, I can’t tell her. Do you know how hard that’s gonna be?,” I utter quickly, staring at the ground with sad eyes.

“So, what you’re just not gonna tell her? You’re gonna jet off to L.A. without saying anything? That’s kind of fucked up, don't you think?,” Ethan asks, with furrowed eyebrows. Ethan did have a point. If we’re serious about moving to L.A., I have to tell [Y/N]. I wouldn’t be fair to her, to just pack a suitcase and hop on a plane and not say anything.

“You’re right, I’m gonna toughen up and call her,” I say, grabbing my phone and beginning to walk back into my own bedroom. Before I can completely step out of the room, I hear Ethan call out, “Wow, I think this is the first time you’ve come into my room early in the morning for something important.” I rolled my eyes at his comment as I approach my bed, sitting down at the edge. Gently placing my finger down on her contact, my brain begins to contemplate between telling her or keeping quiet.

As if my heart and my mind were at war between the two options, one of them being the obvious choice, my mind gets the better of me, figuring that what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

[One Month Later]

Pulling the light sweater over my torso, I look at myself in the mirror, making sure I looked presentable for my day out with [Y/N]. I originally planned on telling her about the upcoming movie the same day I found out, but I couldn’t bring myself to it. Weeks after weeks, I promised myself, “I’m gonna tell her today, I’m gonna tell her today”. Well, that didn’t exactly work out. Ethan and I leave for California in two days, and [Y/N] has no clue.

I wasn’t even a little fond of basically lying to her for an entire month, I hated it. But today, I plan on making this day, the best day of her life and then later telling her that I was soon going to be gone. Was it the best plan ever? Hell no. But it wasn’t like I could just jump into a time machine and tell her sooner. This was the way it had to be.

I spray cologne all over my body, and head into the living room where Ethan was sitting, playing video games as usual. He quickly glances over to me and questions, “Where are you going?”

“I’m gonna go hang out with [Y/N]. To spend some time before we have to say goodbye.”

“Oh, yeah, I forgot to ask you, how was the talk you guys had? How did she take it?,” Ethan says, barely looking away from his game.

I try to distract myself by fiddling with the ends of hair, speaking lowly, “Yeah, I didn’t tell her yet. I’m thinking of telling her today.” With that, Ethan quickly pauses the game in place and turns to me with a bewildered expression invading his usually relaxed features.

“What do mean you didn’t tell her? How could you have waited this long? We leave in two days, Grayson. TWO D-.”

“Yes, Ethan, I get it. But anyway, I told you to pack your PlayStation, ‘cause you’re gonna forget it here,” I say pulling my shoes onto my feet. “I’m not gonna forget it, and speaking of packing, I found our old journals. Do you remember those old journals mom got for us a long time ago?,” Ethan says.

“Oh, yeah. She told us to write all of our goals and thoughts since we’re ‘developing young men’,” I reply, with air quotes. Ethan chuckles lightly as nods his head in my direction. “They’re behind you right there.” I turn around and see two small notebooks, immediately finding mine that had a small ‘G’ in the upper corner.

I quickly flip through, not remembering writing most of the entries that the book contained. I stop at one that I vividly remember writing. It was an entry about [Y/N]. I went on and on for pages talking about how much I truly loved her. I try my best to hide my sudden change in facial expression, not wanting Ethan to find out about what I wrote.

But if I didn’t feel this way about [Y/N] anymore, why would I want to hide it? Am I still in love with [Y/N]? Shaking the thought out of my head, I place the journal back down, slightly pushing it behind a vase, hoping that Ethan wouldn’t find it.

“Alright, I don’t wanna be late. I’ll see you later,” I state, shuffling out of the door.

[Restaurant]

“Thanks again for taking me out to breakfast, Gray. But can I ask why?,” [Y/N] asks, wiping her hands free of any crumbs that may have been left behind on her fingers.

“What, I can’t treat my awesome best friend?,” I ask with a happy expression on my face, but a rather upset one in my mind.

“No, no. I just wondering. I appreciate it, though,” she says, sweetly smiling at me.

“Are you ready to go? We have a full day ahead of us,” I say, opening the check to begin paying for our food. “There’s more?,” she asks, her eyes widen.

“Of course there’s more.”

[Midnight]

I parked the car in front of her house, after our long day of activities, breathing out and sliding my hand off of the wheel. I look over at [Y/N] to see that she’s already looking at me with squinted eyes, studying my features.

“What?”

“You’re up to something, Grayson. The only time you pull a stunt like this, is when you're trying to make up for something. So come on, spill it,” she says, turning her body in her seat, to fully face me. I turn my head to the left looking out of my window, as if I was looking for some escape out of this situation.

“Dude, all I’m doing is enjoying quality time with my best friend, is that a crime?,” I lightly chuckle. “No, Grayson, ‘quality time with your best friend’ is coming over and playing video games. You took me to breakfast, took me shopping, went to amusement park, took me to dinner...You’re covering for something, and you’re gonna tell me.”

As much as I really didn’t want to tell her, I had to. I leave in two- well, tomorrow and there’s no time left to lie. It’s now or never.

“You’re too smart for you’re own good, you know that?,” I pause, “Listen, I’ve been avoiding this conversation for, you don’t want to know how long, and I’m just gonna rip it off like a band-aid because I've been keeping this to myself for ages...Ethan and I got an opportunity to play the main roles in a new movie.”

“Grayson, that’s amazing, why would you want to avoid telling me that? Did you think I’d get jealous or some-”

“We have to move out to Los Angeles.”

“When, in a couple months?,” she asks with concern, being evident in her voice.

“...Tomorrow,” I say, so quietly, to the point where it was almost inaudible. Rather than a response, I hear the unbuckling of a seat belt, and the sound of the car door opening. “[Y/N], wait, please.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? You have to be joking. Grayson, there’s no way in hell that you’re leaving tomorrow. Tell me this is a joke,” she says, raising her voice, closing back the door.

“I should have told you, I know-”

“Yeah, you really should’ve. You spent this whole day, acting like everything was fine. Like you weren’t leaving tomorrow. How could you do that to me?,” she says, sitting back in her seat, with sadness yet an undeniable sense of anger in her voice.

“You know, you sound really selfish right now. I just told you that I got a whole movie deal and you’re acting like this is about you. Be happy for me instead of complaining about me leaving tomorrow,” I demand, feeling irritated that she solely focused on the one negative angle of the situation.

“SELFISH? Sorry, Grayson that I’m not jumping for joy. My best friend just told me that he was flying across the goddamn country for, God knows how long, and he lied to me about. I’m so sorry for being so FUCKING SELFISH,” she says, with her voice wavering and tears pooling in her eyes. “How long have you known?”

“[Y/N], I-,” I begin, before she interrupts.

“No, how long have you known Grayson?,” she persists.

Shaking my head in shame, without daring to make eye contact, I breath out, “A month.” Before she responds with words, she lets out a sarcastic laugh and speaks, “A month. A MONTH. You’ve been lying to my face for a whole month. You didn’t say a thing to me. You waited until the DAY BEFORE to tell me. Do you know how unfair that is? I didn’t even get a chance to mentally prepare for you to leave.”

A quiet sob is the last thing that her voice can manage to let out before she whispers a huge revelation with a pained voice. “You can’t do all this and expect me to be fine by the end of the night. You can’t make me fall in love with you and try to leave, it’s not fair.”

Quickly snapping my head to her direction, I look into her eyes, and I can tell she wasn’t joking or just saying that to make me want to stay. She appeared deeply hurt and it was my fault. I’m about to speak, before she cuts ahead.

“We’ve been friends for fourteen years. Anything I needed, you were the first person who’d try and help me with it. You were there for me when no one else was. You’re everything I’ve ever needed, and to see you go-,” she stops herself, shaking her head and allowing tears to fall from her eyes, the thought of me leaving, which would soon become a reality, being too emotional for her to voice.

“You’re in love with me?,” I ask, still baffled yet astonished at her mind-boggling disclosure, that completely changed the solemnity of the situation. She quickly shuts her eyes at my words, and reaches for the car door handle. “Just forget I said anything.”

“No, [Y/N]. Wait,” I reach for her wrist, but she’s quicker than me and soon reaches the front door, before I could finish speaking to her. “Fuck,” I whisper to myself, resting my back against my seat.

[The Next Morning] [Y/N’s POV]

I roll over onto my back, staring up at my blank ceiling. Even after crying all night last night, I still felt like letting more tears escape from my eyes. Grayson was leaving and there was no way of stopping him. But I shouldn’t be thinking of stopping him. This was his dream and I can’t do anything except support and be there for him. Maybe I am selfish.

My upsetting thoughts are rather thankfully pulled out of mind as I hear the doorbell to my house ring. Before I could get the chance to get out of bed, to see who it was, I get a text. From Grayson. I let out a loud sigh, reading the message: im outside. you can come talk to me if you want. if not, I get it. I have something that I forgot to give to you last night. i’ll call you when my flight lands.

I thought to myself that it wouldn’t be the best option to go see Grayson right now. Just thinking about him makes me want to cry, so who knows what I’ll do if I see him face to face. I couldn’t face him after what I said to him, there’s no way he loves me the way that I love him. Judging by the way he reacted last night, he probably just sees me as a little sister.

Once again I hear my notification go off: my flight leaves in a little bit. i’ll come visit as soon as I can.

I hear a car outside my window drive away. Assuming it was Grayson, I slowly get up and walk towards my front door, pulling it open slightly. I look around for any sight of Grayson, which I thankfully don’t find. I look down, a couple inches ahead of my feet, and I find a small lilac colored gift bag. My favorite color. I pick up the bag and make my way back into the house, towards the kitchen.

Placing the bag on the counter, I look inside and find a small box and a couple pieces of folded paper that appear to have been ripped out of a notebook. I open the box first and find a necklace in the shape of half a heart with the letter ‘G’ engraved in the front. Assuming that Grayson had the other half of the heart with the first letter to my name, I smile to myself at his sweet and thoughtful gesture.

Unfolding the paper and reading the first couple of lines, I gasp out loud, amazed at what I read:

Entry #7

March 8, 2014

I’ve been doing a good job at keeping up with this journal thing. I thought I would’ve stopped after the second entry, but this is actually kind of relaxing to me. I don’t really have much to write about today, so I’ll just write about something always on my mind, rather than just what I did today. There’s this girl named [Y/N]. Where do I start with her? She’s one of the most amazing women I know. She’s the greatest friends anyone could ask for. She’s kind. She’s funny. She’s so smart. She’s painfully gorgeous. Her voice makes my heart do backflips. And her laugh. Man, her laugh is so beautiful. Whenever she touches me, I can still feel my skin tingling even minutes after she moves her hand back. Nobody in the world is perfect, but she makes perfect look so easy. Every time we hangout I try to find some flaw. Even the smallest thing. But I can’t find a thing. She’s my best friend but I can’t keep being just her best friend. I’m so in love with her, it hurts. She may never feel the same way about me but, hell, whether she’s my friend or my girlfriend, I’ll always love her. She’s beyond important to me and I don’t know what I’ll do if I lost her, Alright Mom’s calling me for dinner. I could go on and on about [Y/N] but I’m kind of hungry. Later.

-Gray

I stare at the letter, more specifically the date, as I feel tears well up in my eyes. I quickly fold the paper back to it’s original position, and pick up my phone to call Grayson.

#grayson #grayson and ethan #grayson dolan imagine #grayson dolan #ethan #ethan dolan #ethan dolan imagine #ethan dolan smut #grayson dolan smut #dolan twins #ethan and grayson dolan

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televinita · 6 years

Text

Library Triage

Speaking of my incompetence, I managed to accidentally check out an avalanche of super-awesome-looking/hotly anticipated books with fairly restrictive deadlines toward the beginning of a 10-day hell period at work where I had no time to start them. I am almost out of it now, but they are basically all due by or before the end of June and my brain is spinning out trying to fathom how I am going to organize my reading schedule without rushing and ruining the books for myself, SO, time for project Talk It Out Concretely!

(or. you know. even more ramblingly than usual)

Starting with an achievement: Last night I finally had time to finish Fanny Fran Davis’ Everything Must Go, an absolutely delightful romp which was on its final renewal and only a week away from being due. Prior to that I was working on it in 15-minute breaks at work and 1+ minute stoplights on the commute to work. (seriously. thumbs up to its format.)

SO, HIGH ON THAT:

1. A & L Do Summer - Jan Blazanin: This is a book that Goodreads has been recommending to me for 5 years. I always thought it looked cute, but maybe not substantial, so I kept putting it off because it required an ILL request. But next week’s Top Ten Tuesday prompt is “books to read by the beach,” and I saw this on my recs list again and went, “You know what? This is exactly that kind of book. This is exactly the right time of year to finally read it. I want juvenile cuteness that lets me vicariously be 15 (17 apparently?) again with months of freedom ahead to enjoy in a rural Midwest setting.” I’m struggling with whether to read this or the next book first, but I think this one will go quicker. Due 7/2, like the next two.

[edit: I waited until the day before it was due, for some reason, but it was everything I wanted it to be!]

2. Like Mandarin - Kirsten Hubbard. Another book GR has been recommending to me for 5 years, another one that needed an ILL request. I figured I’d send away for them both together because of sort of similar themes in girl-bonding and rural locales, though this looks much more serious. It’s always caught my eye; there’s just something about the "young high schooler latches onto/idolizes Cool Senior High Schooler" concept that appeals to me -- oh, and only JUST NOW did I realize it's by the same author as my beloved Wanderlove! Definitely loving it now. Definitely.

[edit: accurate]

3. Heart-Shaped Hack - Tracey Garvis-Graves: After rereading The Island for the first time in 6 years and remembering how much I loved that romance/had anticipated more work from her, I saw this and immediately went, “I could cast Waige in this.” I am coming to the conclusion that this is untrue, because Mr. Hacker is turning out to be way too cocky for any character I’ve ever liked, but if I re-calibrate my expectations for what is actually being offered, I still feel like I will love this. And if that’s the case...there is a sequel. (which unfortunately would have to come rather far down on this list)

[edit: really should have waited for the sequel in hand! I think it will be better; this was good but rather more, uh, adult-romance-y than I expected so I’d like to at least see them in a higher stakes plot]

4. Going Geek - Charlotte Huang: technically due first, on 6/23 and it’s an ILL so getting it back is tough. BUT I am less interested in it than any of the 3 above, so if I don’t through at least 2 of them first, I’ll let this one go with no remorse. I only requested it because it seemed similar to Life in Outer Space, but that one was wholly satisfying on its own. This does look like a solid YA novel, but it doesn’t have a special hook, and I am up to my ears in Hook Books.

[edit: I made time! Glad I did; it was better than I expected it to be]

5. The Broken Girls - Simone St. James: Not a specific craving right now, but I have been on a wait list since it was released and mentally waiting since November because I love a good thriller with a mystery from the past & an abandoned building -- and then I forgot to suspend my hold and it came in before I was ready. Also due 6/23, and still hotly requested. I am probably gonna lose my shot to read this on time and have to wait another 4-6 weeks, but at least it’s in my home system.

[edit: I made time! Barely took me 10 pages to get addicted; SO WORTH IT.]

6. Learning to Stay - Erin Celello: This popped when I was looking for novels with brain-damaged spouses. I was looking for Waige-related reasons, and with the veteran angle this isn’t going to work for them, but its premise is irresistible to me and I have a suspicion who it’s perfect for: Barbie/Julia (with begrudging thanks for season 3 of Under the Dome for actively showing me what it could look like). Not due until July 8 and will probably delay it until after #7, actually, because I’m having trouble focusing on other ships right now, even ones I adore.

[edit: well done, though I couldn’t keep my characters straight because there was an annoying lot to match up with my original pick, so I kept unintentionally running everything twice.]

7. Shine Shine Shine - Lydia Netzer: All right, full disclosure -- this one is my final, brightest and best attempt to find Walter/Paige (complete with a Ralph!) in a novel. I am setting myself up to fail, in part because the premise includes the idea that the central female character is kind of off in her own way. But like. How else* was I supposed to react to “genius engineer husband whose wife has 'taught him to feel -- helped him translate his intelligence for numbers into a language of emotion‘ + autistic son”???

(*alternate option for how else: I’ve got Happy in my back pocket: As children, the temperamental Sunny and the neglected savant Maxon found an unlikely friendship no one else could understand. Even the ironic name fits!)

This one just got here and I’ll pick it up in a few days. It’s a home system request, but we only have one copy and I already had to wrestle it away from someone who kept it 2 days overdue* so we might tussle again. (*you might be asking yourself why I did that, given the state of this post. I don’t know either. I was in a feverish delirium of reading desire by that point and every book I found online looked more imperative to get immediately than the last, but I was stuck waiting for all of them).

[edit: it was beautiful and I have so many favorite quotes and I cried a lot and it was worth it even if only one character lined up well; the pair won my heart on their own merit.]

8. 45 Pounds (More or Less) - K.A. Barson: a cute YA novel about an overweight girl trying (or at least being pestered by her mother) to lose weight. I’ve been saving it for motivation for when I actually attempt to exercise / not eat like crap this summer. This, like the remaining books, has essentially no due date since no one is likely to request them out from under me even once I return them.

[edit: tossed back unread for the time being. too many shiny new things appeared.]

9. Voracious: a hungry reader cooks her way through great books - Cara Nicoletti: this is either going to help the above plan or hurt it, but it’s such a great premise, especially as someone who once considered starting a side blog devoted to highlighting passages in books that describe great meals. I am not actually sure if I will finish it at all. But I’d like to try.

[edit: see above.]

10. Shelf Discovery: The Teen Classics We Never Stopped Reading: this book was mentioned in a review for one of the lesser-known books in it; I forget which one, but it intrigued me because there are TONS of titles in here that aren’t usually mentioned in online lists like this, and I love when people talk about books I have actually loved instead of pretending that Catcher in the Rye and The Perks of Being a Wallflower are the best examples of universal YA literature we can find.

(What’s most likely going to happen is I’m going to read 3 chapters and then wig out about how many I haven’t read and put it back until I have, so I can enjoy the comparisons in our reactions instead of being unduly influenced, but... )

11. Sixteen: short stories by outstanding writers for young adults: Absolutely lowest priority, probably will never get to it, but if I had no other reading responsibilities right now? I would be reading it now. I spotted this when I went to pick up the above, and I don’t even usually like short stories, but this is a compilation of outstanding writers for young adults IN THE 1980S. And there is a very specific style to young adult books from the 1980s that sometimes, I just absolutely crave. Let me give you more of its description: Stories dealing with teenage concerns, written especially for this collection by well-known authors of young adult novels such as the Mazers [that would be Harry and Norma Fox], M.E. Kerr, Robert Cormier, Bette Greene, and Richard Peck. Biographical sketches for each author are included, as well as follow-up activities for the reader. Me, gesticulating wildly at basically all these names: I KNOW THEM! (as authors, I mean. Once upon a time the library’s teen section was full of their work and I devoured it as voraciously as the newer stuff)

[edit: it was short, so I read it and am glad I did.]

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AND AS PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED: THERE ARE STILL MORE I WANT, but I can’t think about them right now.

#reading triage #library checkouts #aw crap I just realized I forgot another two I actually have checked out #but I have been checking them out since April and still haven't gotten to them so IDK if I will bother

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