Lexa!Lives AU / I’m No Mirage : When Lexa’s dry, dehydrated eyes cracked open, she found herself half buried in dirt not knowing anything of how she arrived there, her memory bank entirely withdrawn. Scavenging whatever meagre possessions she could muster, she takes a moment to clock in her location before spotting the derelict and destitute ruins of Polis looking miniscule on the horizon, and sets out on a mission to look for survivors of whatever calamity befell the capital.
When she sets foot in the smaller ruins along the way, desperation settles into the marrow of Lexa’s aching bones, discovering the ghosts of the people who perished in the inferno, barely able to walk any further as water deprivation robs her of the ability to think straight. A flash of movement enters into her peripheral vision, shocking her back to reality and she chases after it, risking whatever life she has left in her to seek it out.
And then, she sees her...the breathtaking visage of the one she vowed to protect with her life trudging along the sandy dunes with a small wagon of supplies. Her brilliant blonde hair dazzles underneath the harsh sunlight, face crimson with sand burns, sporting a massive scab on her forehead, but it was still her. Her beacon and the great love of her life. Dry sobs rattle through her rib cage, Lexa wondering if she’ll break apart from this alone.
“Clarke?” Lexa calls out, testing her voice, raising her hand up to gather her attention.
Clarke stumbles to her feet, the shovel in her hand coming tumbling down to the ground, mouth hung open in abject shock.
“I must be going crazy, I’m seeing things...you’re not here-no, you can’t be here. I saw you get shot. I saw you bleed out and fade away,” Clarke’s eyes well with tears, warring with herself to keep from crying too much. Risking tears in the desert was a way to mark yourself for the grim reaper.
“I’m no mirage, Clarke. I’m here, I’m actually here,” Lexa closes the distance between them, taking her lover’s body into her arms for a soul nourishing embrace, hope blooming to life once more inside of her form. Clarke’s tired hands cup her face, drowning herself in Lexa’s touch, kissing her wherever she could find exposed skin.
“I think I know how we can get get out of here,” Clarke parts from Lexa; albeit, reluctantly, “I found our Rover buried in the sand.”
“Let me,” Lexa leans down, separating sand with her fingers, but Clarke stays her hand.
“You’re suffering from heat exhaustion, Lexa...I’m not gonna let you die here trying to help,” Clarke practically orders her, and the most fragile of smiles grows on Lexa’s face, daring herself to hold onto a mote of happiness.
It’s a massive endeavor, but little by little, the sand ebbs away to uncover the Rover, both Clarke and Lexa celebrating the small triumph with a kiss as Clarke immediately sets her focus on getting it operational again by rewiring the solar panels. Clarke spots a few water canteens in the interior, immediately passing it off to Lexa, relieved to have at least that much.
“Ready to do this?” Clarke looks over to Lexa, both their hands covering the gear shift, holding their breaths.
“Lead the way,” Lexa closes her eyes, joining in Clarke’s pure elation when the Rover’s engine roars to life, resurrected and renewed. Confidence growing in Clarke, she and Lexa set off, looking for what life remains on the planet, beginning the next great journey in their lives.
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the men and boys are innocent too.
we cry "the innocent women and children" to appeal to the masses, to try and force their sympathy, but the men and boys are innocent too.
I have seen sons crying out for their mothers, their fathers, their siblings. I have seen them break down at the loss of their families. I have seen them cling to their dead and grieve.
I have seen fathers cradle their dead children, seen them kiss their faces and hold their little hands. I have seen them faint with grief when asked to identify the dead. I have seen them carry their sons and daughters. I have seen them fasting to provide what little they can for their families.
I have seen men and boys digging through the rubble with just their bare hands, I have seen them comforting strangers, playing with children, rocking them, hushing them, even if the face of such imminent danger. I have seen them cry, seen them grieve, seen them break down into each other's arms, seen them be selfless, beyond selfless, becoming something I don't have a word for.
I have seen the men who are doctors refuse to leave their patients, even when they have no medicine or supplies to give them, even when they're threatened with bombings. I have seen fathers who have lost all their children pick orphans up into their arms and proclaim them their child so they are not alone. I have seen men and boys digging pets out of the rubble.
the men are innocent too. the men and boys are being hurt and killed too. the men and boys are grieving too. the men and boys are scared too. the men and boys are fighting to save their people too. the men and boys deserve to be fought for too.
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