#this man would just take some fucking mushrooms and VIBE

[algrenion]

Gale of Waterdeep would lay on the floor with a fat zoot and listen to Pearl Jam and Jimi Hendrix on a vinyl record player and fuck you if you think otherwise

#i also headcanon that his guilty pleasure music would be coldplay's first 3 albums and im GRITTING MY TEETH just thinking about how much th #this man would just take some fucking mushrooms and VIBE #GGHGGHGGHRHHGH #drugs mention #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale of waterdeep #he's a MASSIVE INTELLECTUAL HIPPIE lets be REAL

[bakubunny]

um- if no one asked i would like you to hear those hc’s on izuku and shinso 🙄 (tenya and tokoyami too if that’s not asking for too much😔)

not too much for sure, i’m having a lot of fun with this. ask away. 🖤 tried to chill a little bit on some of the sizes bc i’m tryna have mercy on some of y’all.

eat up @cheffuckboyrdee @neon-gothicc.

repeating the disclaimer that i know it’s not realistic for every guy ever to be above average but it’s my (dick) party and i’ll drool over them if i want to.

midoriya

size is 6.5” long and 6.25” girth, he’s longer than average, shorter than the others i’ve mentioned so far and it’s thickkkk. BUT

i’m a little undecided on him bc my brain says “i want to throat pro!deku’s dick while he uses me until head empty,” but my heart says, “canonically he’s got the fattest dick hands down, *maybe* after kiri.” and we’ve already discussed kiri, we know no one is taking his dick down their throat. so my hcs on izuku’s (and sometimes kiri’s) size fluctuate a bit. 😅

curved upward, very veiny, bit of a mushroom head. fairly even girth but widest at the base. heavy balls.

clean shaven for the most part except maybe a soft green patch and a cute lil happy trail…. def not bc he’s into rimming and has his own dildos he wants to get pegged with.

goes crazy over teasing head and long hand jobs with edging but also has the desire to ruthlessly fuck your throat ngl. loves fucking your thighs.

also a fan of foreplay out of necessity. hence another reason why he’s such a big lover of giving head.

shinso

size is 7” long and just shy of 6” girth. he’s at that sweet spot imo where he’s big enough to feel huge inside and heavy when it hits your face but you’re not in a cold sweat just trying to take the whole thing.

even girth, mostly straight with a little bit of a curve to the left. some prominent veins but not a ton. he’s another one with pretty balls. 🫢

he’s got a cute purple happy trail at his belly button. 🥺 likes to stay trimmed but will clean up if you ask.

loves when you deep throat him and gets even harder if you struggle or gag. loves sloppy head & when you massage his balls.

many of the guys mentioned so far have nice softies, but his is particularly cute.

tokoyami

i am going to resist the urge to hc his size as 8-9”/6”ish and uncut even tho that’s what i feel deep in my soul abt this man. 😭 pro!fumi just has that vibe. i’m not trying to make them all the same, i promise.

size is 6.5” long and 5.5” girth. enough to leave you more than satisfied and bonus: finally someone who’s not too big for quickies whenever you want. (say you’re bratting a lil too much and next thing you know you’re bent over in a public bathroom. 🫢 or he just can’t wait to get you home. 🫢🫢)

uncut, straight, not v. veiny, even girth or widest at the base (i can’t decide), breeder balls. they’re heavy and pretty. typically clean shaven, little bit of a happy trail when he does let it grow.

if any of you lovelies remember this hc series, you might remember that i firmly believe fumi loves getting head.

likes any position that involves being really close physically or going as deep as possible.

iida

size is a bit over 6” long and 5” girth. he’s not the biggest of boys but he knows how to use it… with a little guidance. probably for the better that he’s not massive bc he likes to go hard and fast, but you can break him of that habit if you want.

cut, a little veiny, downward curve, and narrower at the base and wider at head. his balls are big in comparison to his dick.

likes having his perineum played with but was absolute shocked at how quickly he came from it the first time.

he can be dominant but he’s weak for pretty eyes, pretty lips, and tit jobs. let your tongue hang out and hold up your bare tits and he’s a goner.

todoroki

size is 6.5” long and a little under 5.5” girth. shower rather than a grower. he’s got a softie that hangs and it’s adorable.

hard upward curve, veiny, head that’s not too prominent but cut, slightly narrower at base and head. his balls match his size but they’re very sensitive. doesn’t always like them played with but sometimes it’s nice.

his body hair is half & half just like the hair on his head. 😭 generally very clean shaven but it’s so pretty when he lets that happy trail grow.

i can’t decide if he prefers handjobs or oral sex more but he whines like a damn baby when you edge him and he loves it.

#why all of you are reading these is kind of beyond me bc this is so cringe #but i’m glad ur along for the ride #there’s probably more i could do if you ask tbh #i’ve even thought through a few jjk characters #aged up characters #bnha smut #smut hcs #Tokoyami smut #todoroki smut #Iida smut #midoriya smut #shinsou smut #bakubunny #tokoyami fumikage #midoriya izuku #todoroki shoto #iida tenya #shinsou Hitoshi

[lyv-writes]

sweet leaf: older!eddie munson x reader

words: 4,961

warnings: older!eddie munson, afab!reader, reader is in their early to mid 20s, eddie is in his early 40s, age gap, modern!au—2006, weed smoking, hand job, first time blow jobs, deepthroating, mild face-fucking, daddy kink, ddlg kinda vibes, aftercare, so many pet names this was Very self indulgent,

notes: absolutely obsessed with older!eddie and had this sitting in my brain for so long i needed it Out <3 this was also crossposted on ao3!

⋆｡˚🌿•✧˖𖦹⋆🍃✧°.

“C’mon, kid, just a lil’ hit.”

His voice is teasing and you quickly avert your gaze, focusing on the way your fingers pick at the threads at the hem of your dress. He presses his lips to the mouth of the bong to clear the rest of the bowl before adding, “I’ll pack a small one—just for you.”

The way his voice deepened, a rasp underlying his words when he talked around the smoke in his lungs, had a shiver going down your spine, settling in your lower belly. You watched as he blew the smoke out of the corner of his mouth, his lips tugging up into a wry grin. Gray was intertwined in the curls that spring free from the low bun he had them pulled back in.

This wasn’t exactly what you had planned when you knocked on Eddie, your neighbor and local dealer’s door. He sold psychedelics—mushrooms, acid tabs, ecstasy—but he also sold weed, dabs, oils, and edibles. Quite a few of the older people in the park went to him for medicinal stuff, like ointments and tinctures. You had planned to just stop by, buy a small baggie of some good bud, and then retreat to your room to cough embarrassingly loud with your music up high enough to cover the sound. It’s not that you didn’t want to smoke with him, but you had never smoked before, and with your stupid crush on the older man, you didn’t want to embarrass yourself by coughing up a lung on his living room carpet.

Having moved to this trailer park with your dad and his new wife in middle school, you had lived here for just under a decade before Eddie moved in. He lived alone, the sound of his music often bleeding out from his open windows. By the time you would get home from work, he was usually sitting on his couch, guitar draped over his lap with his door open enough to let in a breeze. You would steal glances anytime you got, watching his fingers move along the frets, wondering if he would give you lessons if you asked.

He lived here for nearly a year before you even worked up the courage to speak to him.

Once you did, though, you saw just how nice he was—even if he was a bit flirty, he always kept his hands to himself, a comfortable distance between you two, and didn’t ask any probing questions. He was older, having at least a good fifteen years on you, but you enjoyed his company. He ended up giving you guitar lessons, noticing your interest in his guitars whenever you would sit and watch him play. He refused to take any money despite you offering it, and you had resorted to leaving it tucked under a couch pillow or in the case of his guitar when he wasn’t looking.

That’s how you ended up here, sitting on his couch after buying weed from him at the end of one of your lessons. You don’t know what made you think he wouldn’t have invited you to stay for a sesh, or what made you think that you were strong enough to say no when he leaned against the doorway of his room the way he did, muscled biceps exposed by the denim, patch-clad kutte he wore, even around his house.

“I have a brand!” He would say when you would tease him about it.

Opening your mouth to speak, the sound caught in your throat when Eddie dropped onto the seat next to you on his couch, arm slung over the back and his other out-stretched with the bong in hand, gesturing for you to take it.

“I know s’your first time,” Eddie said, the playful smirk on his lips telling you he was all too aware of the double meaning to his words. A flush painted your face as you willed yourself not to squirm in your seat. “But don’t worry, princess—I’ll take care a’ya.”

His words are playful, but there’s a soft sincerity in his eyes that has you smiling back shyly with a roll of your eyes before taking the bong from his hands. “Like this?” you ask, hesitantly pressing your lips to the mouthpiece, trying to ignore the way your lips tingle at the thought of Eddie’s lips having been here only moments before. You glance back up at him, his dark brown curls pulled back and away from his face, showing off the strong slope of his shoulder that disappeared underneath the black tank-top he wore.

“Jus’ like that,” he affirms, reaching over to pick-up the lighter on his coffee table. Scooting closer to you, he angles himself so he’s facing you. “I’ll spark it for’ya, just make sure you take a slow inhale, okay? Too fast and you’ll cough—and not in a fun way.”

Nodding with your mouth pressed against the bong, Eddie’s eyes quickly dart to the way the plush skin is pressed against the glass before his eyes return to yours, and he lowers the flame of the lighter to the bud. Doing as he says, you inhale slowly, the thick smoke unfamiliar to your lungs and throat but you try your hardest not to cough as Eddie pulls the bowl from the stem, letting you inhale the rest of the smoke before you pull your mouth away to exhale.

Eddie’s eyes darken with something unreadable as your watery eyes meet his, eyebrows pinched as you tuck your face into your elbow to cough a couple of times. You can already feel the effects of the weed, your eye-lids feeling heavy as your head threatens to float off into the clouds. A relieved sigh leaves your lips and you can already feel your shoulders relaxing, a small smile curving at your lips.

“Can I do another?”

Eddie chuckles, reaching over for the bag of bud he pulled your cut from and pulling out a small nug to break apart. “As you wish,” he retorts, packing the bowl without taking the bong from your hands.

“Are you quoting The Princess Bride?” You ask, a teasing tone to your voice.

“Maybe,” he says, throwing a sideways glance at you. “What do you know about The Princess Bride? You weren’t even born yet.”

“I was three,” you reply, kicking his shin with little conviction. “And I happen to have a thing for the classics.”

“Oh yeah?” His tone is light, teasing, but the arch of his eyebrow and the way his tongue darts out to wet his lips tells you he sees right through you, and the thought has heat engulfing your face. “What other classics do you have a thing for, hm, princess?”

His voice lowered in a way you never heard from him before that had an ache growing in your core. You tried subtly rubbing your thighs together before stopping, too nervous that Eddie would see and catch on. “Oh, y’know, t-the usuals like…16 Candles and…uhm, The Smiths…stuff like that.”

Internally you cringed at the way you stumbled through your reply, your effort of trying to sound blasé completely backfiring. Lucky for you, Eddie is a true gentleman, and instead of pressing it further, he hums in a way that tells you ‘you’re a bad liar’ and changes the subject, “Want me to light it for you again?”

“Please?” you ask shyly, still trying to dampen down your racing heart as you peek up at him through your lashes to find his eyes already on you.

He shakes his head, a playful scoff leaving his lips as he brings the flame to the bowl once again. “You really are a princess, huh? Sure are spoiled like one.”

The blush that had just begun to fade to pink started to creep back to your cheeks as you inhaled, unable to respond with your lips pressed to the bong. After a couple of seconds, he pulled the bowl away just as before, you held the smoke a little bit longer before blowing it out to the side like you had seen Eddie do.

“See? Not so bad, right?” Eddie asks with a knowing smile.

Nodding slowly, you close your eyes briefly as the feeling washes over you, head swimming as the high settles in. “Feels good,” you murmur, bloodshot eyes connecting with Eddie’s. You’re not sure what prompted the next words from your mouth, surely you could have worded your appreciation better, but you couldn’t help but test the waters, just a bit. “Thanks for takin’ such good care’a me, Eddie. Knew you would.”

His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed hard at your words, fist clenching then relaxing where it sat on his thigh. If you had blinked, you would have missed the way his eyes widened slightly before returning to normal, as if he was surprised that you would flirt back. If you’re being honest, you surprised yourself. You’re usually too flustered by him to flirt back, but with the weed in your system, you find yourself overthinking your words less.

He reaches out with a hum, fingers grazing your cheek as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, his voice a low murmur when he says, “Pretty lil’ things like you need to be taken care of, ain’t that right, bunny?”

You find yourself leaning into his touch slightly, nodding as your eyes glance at his lips before coming back to him. His hand rests on your cheek, heavy against the side of your face, as his fingers card through your hair with his thumb rubbing against your cheek softly. You’re chasing his touch, craving his hands elsewhere as your eyes flutter closed, feeling the edges of your thinking get fuzzy.

His thumb traces the slope of your cheek, trailing down to your lips and settling on the plush bottom lip. Tugging your lip down with his thumb, it bounces back into place and he’s immediately pressing his thumb against the seam of your lips. His eyes leave where they were fixed on your mouth and meet your gaze, as his thumb presses more insistently to your lips, in a silent demand to open for him.

Heat over takes your cheeks, your lids drooping at the visage of Eddie in front of you, pupils blown wide and eyes darkened with hunger. It’s like something from your filthiest wet dreams, the lustful look on his face one you had dreamed of fixed on you as your hand traced the slick folds of your core. Never, not once in the almost two-and-a-half years you knew Eddie, did you ever think you would be here, on his couch, his thumb prodding at your lips and his heated gaze fixed on the plush skin.

Slowly, your tongue peeks from between your lips, flattening against the pad of his thumb before taking it further into your mouth. A deep groan leaves his throat at the feeling of you closing your lips around his digit, circling your tongue around the tip as if it were the tip of his cock. Becoming more bold in your actions, you take more of his thumb into your mouth, bobbing your head subtly before taking it to the knuckle.

Removing his thumb, he quickly replaced it with two of his fingers when you whined at the loss, shushing you as he watched you eagerly take his fingers into your mouth. He wrapped his free arm around your waist, fingers pressing deliciously into the plush skin at your waist as he helped you situate yourself in his lap, fingers never leaving the warmth of your mouth.

“That’s it, bunny,” he mumbles under his breath, eyes fixed on where his fingers disappeared between your lips. “Show Daddy how you’d take his cock in your pretty mouth.”

A moan leaves your throat, thighs attempting to squeeze together at his words. Bobbing your head a couple of times, you pull away with a string of spit still connecting you to his fingers. “I-I’ve never—”

“That’s alright, baby,” Eddie says softly, hand softly petting the side of your head. “You don’t haf’ta do anything, you’re bein’ so good f’me already.”

Shaking your head, you can’t help but press yourself closer to him. This was all new territory for you. You had never gone past kissing and light groping over clothes. You had never been in someone’s lap, never felt the growing bulge of their arousal nudging against your aching core, but you wanted him to show you how to be good for him.

“I want to,” you finally blurt out, quickly hiding your face in the crook of his neck. He smells like faded cologne, weed, and sweat, and the combination of that and the feeling of his hard cock pressing against your panty-clad core through his jeans had you subtly rocking in his lap.

“Nuh-uh,” Eddie chides, coaxing your head from his neck with his fingers tangled in your hair. “You’re gonna look me in my eye when you ask to suck my cock, princess.”

His words had your head spinning, the feeling of his hand tugging gently at your hair to get you to move your head sent a dull ache through your core. Conceding to his urges, you move your head from the comfort of his neck, hesitantly meeting his gaze and being pleasantly surprised at the gentle look in his eye and the soft smile on his lips.

“There she is,” he cooes, bumping your nose with his. The hand that was in your hair comes around to rest on your cheek, the other that was in your mouth comes to rest on your hip, absently squeezing the meat of it. “Now, c’mon, bunny. Use your words for Daddy, hm?”

“Can I—please, can I suck your cock?” Stumbling over your words, you force yourself to keep eye contact with him, seeing the way his eyes narrow in satisfaction.

“Can I please suck your cock, what?”

A groan rumbles in your chest, frustrated at him making you repeat what was already hard enough to say the first time. He was a filthy old man and you had half a mind to tell him so, but thought better of it. Clenching your jaw with a pinched brow you stare down at him from where you’re perched on his lap, his teasing grin making you melt and even more annoyed at the same time.

“Don’t gimme that look,” His voice was firm as he spoke, the grin never leaving his face but the playful edge was slowly disappearing. “Ask properly. You’re lucky I’m being nice and not making you get on your knees and beg for it.”

A small gasp leaves your lips at his words, teeth sinking into your bottom lip to stifle the sound. You see the stern role falter slightly, that gentleness, as well as a hint of sheepishness returning to his eyes as he gives a reassuring squeeze to the love-handle at your side. “Too much?”

Shaking your head quickly, your hand comes up to his face to rub softly at his cheek the way he had yours. “Not at all…you’re so hot, Daddy.”

He groans out a curse, hips bucking up into yours at the sound of the title rolling off your tongue. His other hand drops to your waist, squeezing the plush flesh and relishing in the way his hand sunk into the pillowy curves. His reaction sent a wave of confidence through you, seeing that he was just as affected by this as you were. Your next words fell from your lips, demure and coated in innocence.

“Can I please suck your cock, Daddy?”

“Fuck, princess,” he grunts, holding you still by your waist so he can grind his dick onto your clothed pussy. “Makin’ me feel like I could cum in my pants like’a goddamn teenager.”

Rubbing your core against him, you find your rhythm, grinding down everytime he ruts up into you. Your breath is leaving your lips in whiny pants, electricity shooting up your spine from the way the zipper on Eddie’s jeans was catching your clit at the right angle. “Mmm, not in your pants, Daddy, in my mouth—please, teach me how to suck you off.”

His hips stutter against yours before coming to a stop, grip tightening enough on your waist that you briefly think there will be bruises—you hope there will be bruises. “As you wish, princess.”

He pressed a feverish kiss to your lips, hand weaving through the mussed up hair at the nape of your neck and using it to drag you closer to his mouth. A groan rumbles in his chest at the taste of your lipgloss—something fruity, strawberry maybe? He licks at the seam of your lips, desperate to get another taste.

Definitely strawberry.

Upon his insistence, you open your mouth, meeting his tongue with yours. A moan tickled your lips as your mouth swallowed the sound that came from Eddie, the arm around your waist pulling you impossibly closer until your breasts were flush against his chest. You were sure he could feel your nipples as they hardened underneath your sundress, the friction of them against Eddie’s chest causing your panties to stick to your wet core.

Pulling away reluctantly, both of your chests heave with the breaths the kiss had stolen. Eddie’s eyes are wild, his cheeks flushed and lips pouty and pink from your kisses. “On your knees,” he orders, pointing down at the carpet in front of his seat on the couch.

Quickly, you leave his lap, settling on your knees at his feet. You look up at him expectedly, waiting for his next orders and the eager look on your face has him palming himself over his jeans. “Take my cock out, little bunny. Hop to it.”

A giggle bubbles from your lips at his pun as you start with his belt, you unfastening it before pulling it out of the buckle. Moving onto the button and zipper, you return your eyes to his, as you hook your fingers into the waistband of his jeans, finding no boxers underneath, and tug slightly for him to lift his hips. He lifts them enough for you to slide them down to his thighs, his hard cock slapping against the trail of dark hair on his tummy that led to a trimmed patch of hair at the base. A sharp breath falls from your lips at the sight of his thick cock, the head an angry red, pre-cum already beading at the tip and rolling down the side as his cock twitched under your stare. Your eyes followed the trail it left, but your lips ached to trace its path.

Sure, you were a virgin, but you were also a twenty-something-year-old with the libido to rival a hormonal, teenage boy. Tucked away in a box under your bed you had a dildo, but it was nothing compared to Eddie. He was slightly longer, but that’s not what had you salivating at the sight. His was thick—you were sure your fingers wouldn’t meet around his width and you let out a small moan when you wrapped your fingers around him and found that you were right.

“Look at you,” he coos, heavy hand resting on the crown of your head, black polished nails scratching your scalp gently. “Moaning at the sight of my cock? Kinda slutty for a virgin, don’cha think, princess?”

Glaring up at him from where you sat on your knees, your lips form a petulant pout, grip tightening enough around his cock earning a hiss from him. “Don’t be mean, Eddie.”

“Aw, c’mon, bunny,” he croons, his voice strained as you slowly begin to pump his cock, experimenting with your grip and the twist of your wrist. “Think s’cute how eager you are for your first cock. Jerkin’ me off and I didn’t even haf’ta ask, such a good bunny for Daddy.”

His words are followed shortly by a moan at the feeling of your tongue meeting the side of his cock, following the trail of pre-cum back to it’s source and suckling there. You’re surprised that you’re not put off by the taste, pulling away with a hazey look in your eyes before you’re going back down, taking a little more of him in your mouth and bobbing your head experimentally.

“Y-you sure you haven’t—ah—done this before,” he asks with a chuckle, fingers tightening in your hair, urging you down to take a little more of him in your mouth. His hips kick up at the feeling of you swallowing around his length before you’re pulling away, using your spit as lube to keep stroking his cock.

“I practice on my toy at home,” you reply, a shy look in your eyes despite your hand wrapped around his cock, still pumping, occasionally swirling around the head. “I read a lotta smutty shit and got curious. I…like the way it feels…in my mouth.”

“Just a natural-born cockwhore, huh, baby,” he says sweetly, as if he was giving you a compliment. His nails gently scratch at your head, the way you would scratch behind a dog’s ear, and it was embarrassing the way you melted into his touch, thighs rubbing together, searching for some friction to relieve the throbbing in your core. “Now, make Daddy cum with your mouth so he can get a taste of that sweet bunny-cunt.”

“Oh my God, how do you even think of this shit?” You question with a whine as you press your lips to the head of his cock, letting your spit run down the shaft before you’re taking him further into your mouth, gagging as you take him to your throat.

“Easy there, baby, take it slow,” he guides, smoothing his hand across your hair before following your head back down with his hand, feeling your mouth take in his cock and the suction you applied to his tip before answering your question around a groan. “I do—on’t know, I just start runnin’ my mouth when I get’a pretty girl on my cock.”

Getting comfortable with the amount of his length that was in your mouth, you pull back just enough to take a breath before returning your mouth to his cock, humming around him as you relax your throat, bobbing your head in a steady rhythm. Your toy at home had lulled you into a false sense of security regarding how easy deepthroating was. Eddie’s cock stretched your mouth a near-uncomfortable amount, but the feeling of him heavy on your tongue had you relishing in the ache.

Pulling off of him, a string of spit and his arousal stretches between you and his cock, snapping once you pull away too far. Licking from the base to his tip, you lap at his slit before looking up at him, slowly pumping his cock. “Teach me how to deepthroat, Daddy, please. Want to so bad, but you’re so big.”

You don’t need him to teach you, but god the look on his face when you say it was so worth it. His eyes widened a fraction, the flush that was dusting his cheeks deepening as his cock throbbed in your hand. “Fuck, anything for you, princess. I know it’s a lot, but you’re gonna be a good girl and take it all, right?”

“Yes, Daddy, I’ll be so good,” you promise, a whine behind your words as you speed up your strokes.

Lowering your mouth to his cock again, you work him into your mouth unhurriedly, not wanting to rush but feeling confident in your ability to take him. You feel him near the back of your throat and you stop before you feel yourself gag, drawing back slightly before pressing just a little bit further.

“That’s it, baby,” Eddie says, a moan slipping through his lips at the feeling of the opening of your throat contracting around his cock. “Relax your throat f’me, take me a little bit further…atta-bunny. Nearly halfway there.”

A soft moan vibrates around his cock, his hips bucking just a fraction at the feeling. Nearly halfway, you thought to yourself, wondering if you would even be able to take it all. You promised him though, and you would at least try for Eddie.

Relaxing your throat around his length, you feel him slip deeper, your nose almost brushing the short hairs at the base of his cock. You look up at him excitedly, hands gripping his thighs hard enough that your nails were beginning to leave little red crescents in his pale skin. He chuckles down at you softly, hand petting your hair with a tenderness that didn’t fit the way his cock was sitting snug in your throat. The hand that wasn’t on your head trails down to your dress, quickly yanking the top down, exposing your breasts to the cool air of his trailer.

“Just a little bit left, baby,” he encourages, thumb brushing a stray tear away from your cheek. His hand rests on your cheek, his other dropping to your tit to play with your nipple, rolling the hard bud between his fingers before repeating the action on the other. You hum around him, that fuzzy feeling coating your thoughts, making your vision a little fuzzy. “Think you can take it all?”

Nodding as best as you can around his length, you swallow as best as you can before you’re slowly inching the rest of his cock down your throat, wiggling your head side-to-side to get that last little bit in. Your nose is firmly nestled in the hair at his base, the smell of his body wash and natural musk leaving you to wish you had something to rut against.

“Atta-fuckin-girl,” he moans, the feeling of you swallowing around him once again nearly driving him to the edge. He thrusts his hips gently, testing the waters a bit before moving more properly, pulling your head back an inch before sinking you back down to the base. He feels your throat fluttering around his cock, your breath coming out quicker through your nose, and knows it’s time to ease off a bit.

“God, you look so dumb, not a thought in that pretty head’a yours,” he groans, cock dragging slowly along the walls of your throat as he slowly pulls his length out of your mouth. Your mouth hangs open as you catch your breath, makeup streaked down your face. “Daddy’s dumb bunny. Takin’ my cock so well for her first time.”

“Y-You get off on knowin’ this is my first time suckin’ dick, don’t you?” You ask, stammering through the revelation as you try and catch your breath. Spit and precum drip from your lips, throat sore from how deep you managed to take him. “Dirty old perv, gettin’ me high then fucking my face.”

“Fuck, bunny, call me a perv again and I’m gonna cum,” he groans, jerking himself off over your face. Mouthing along his cock, your mouth finds his balls, sucking one into your mouth while you play with the other in your hand. His voice is rough, almost sounding like a growl as he orders you around. “Say it again, so I can paint your pretty fuckin’ face.”

“Such a fuckin’ perv, Daddy,” you say immediately. “Teachin’ your lil’ bunny how to take your cock the way you like.”

The words have barely left your mouth before you’re meeting his eye, taking the head of his cock between your lips again. You take as much of him in your mouth as you can, stroking the rest with your hand as you swallow around his cock. His groans, the way they increase in volume, tells you he’s close.

“F-fuck!”

All it takes is a twist of your wrist and you hollowing your cheeks for Eddie to cum, pressing his cock to the back of your throat as he releases as close to your throat as you could take him.

“Good fuckin’ girl, princess,” Eddie praises, breathing quick as he comes down from his high. He cards his fingers through your hair, helping you stand and fall into his lap. He lets you catch your breath for a second before he’s pressing his lips to yours in a deep kiss, his tongue licking into your mouth to taste himself on yours.

Pulling away, he pulls up the top of your dress to cover your breasts again, gently pulling the straps over your shoulders and patting them once they were to his liking. He smiles softly at you, placing a lingering kiss on your forehead before wrapping his arms around your waist.

“Wha’d’ya say we put on a movie, let you settle down a bit, and then I make you cum on my tongue,” Eddie says, boyish grin settling across his lips. “Does that sound good, princess?”

Rolling your eyes, you press a quick to his lips before getting off his lap and settling in front of the DVDs he has next to his TV set. “Fine, but after the blowjob I just gave you? I think I deserve to pick the movie.”

“You say that as if I didn’t just say I would make you cum too!”

“Yeah, but that’s a privilege for you, not me.”

“God, you’re so hot when you’re bossy,” he says with a groan, leaning his head back against the couch.

“I’m glad you think so,” you reply, plucking a DVD from the stack and waving it in front of his face, the Barbie Mermaidia cover that his niece had left there after her last visit taunting him. “Because I just found what we’re watching!”

#eddie munson x reader #stranger things #older!eddie munson #my writing #eddie munson smut #if you know me no you dont #honestly that tag could be used on any piece of my writing

[ofoceansandtombsanew]

taking away mc ships, what are you shipping in the our life cinematic universe?

okay so mcs are all off the table damn

hhhHHHHNNNNGHHH i had to think about this one for a minute

quick tldr:

lee/ren

derek/ren

baxter/liz

cove/baxter

opal/cliff

vianca/liz

serenity/tamarack

cove/tamarack

derek/tamarack

derek/qiu

okay so my first one might be a hear me out-er butー lee and ren. our sweet cousin lee and ren murray. LIKE CAN Y'ALL SEE MY VISION??? they would be the cutest girlfriends. like, lee is bright and forward but she's gentle and patient enough that ren's shyness wouldn't be something that grates her? and she'd gently coax ren out of her shell

lee doesn't give 'outdoorsy' girl, but she would definitely try out camping and hiking for ren because lee's the type to go out of her way like that. so yeah, definitely ship lee and ren for sure

another compatible person for ren that i can see is derek? like omg that would so fucking cute to me! both of them are sportsy, derek is literally a golden retriever in the shape of a person. he's very considerate and he takes that into account if ren comes over to hang out with his family, knowing when she needs her space

but if derek is putting too much pressure on himself, ren is there to tell him just that. she doesn't say it unkindly though. she just wants her bf to not be his biggest critic. and they love doing any outdoor activity together. when they get their families together, its suarezs versus murrays and afterwards they go to a family restaurant and talk the night away

ironically enough, even though baxter had a canonical crush on qiu when they were kids i don't see it moving past that. it's a crush fond to baxter's heart and he keeps it at that, a fond memory. definitely would never tell them ever. but if i was gonna ship him with anybody in the expansive universe of ol...

hear me out but i feel like liz and baxter would be surprisingly compatible. like, she doesn't take any bs and would get the guy to talk and open up. but if someone comes for him, she is right there in his corner ready to bat for her man. they'd have some good banter as well i think?

i think cove and baxter could also work if it's their step 4 selves. baxter is finally done running away from things and being more genuine and vulnerable and while cove is slow to warm up to people, he would see baxter is trying and slowly but surely their "we only hangout if our mutual friends invite us to the same space" turns into texting each of their own accord and eventually that becomes hanging out of their own accord

then the next thing you know, baxter is asking cove out on a date

oooh yes, i see it more clearly. cove and baxter would be a delicious slowburn for sure, it's drinking and leaving no molecules

i ship opal and yusuf together and i'm really hoping something comes from that when we get the full game however comma.... opal and cliff? i kinda see it and it kinda eats

outside of vianca's canonical gf, vianca and liz give power couple vibes. i don't think i need to expand on that, we all know i'm right and we all know it would eat

if i can't be with my autumn queen tamarack, i would want her to date serenity? they just seem like they would be the cutest cottage core gf/goth gf combination and the two friends in the group that everyone goes to for advice/drama. they gossip about it over tea and still they're the most wholesome couple you know

cove and tamarack also just seem like they'd be very cute together? summer boyfriend meets autumn girlfriend. in a childhood neighbors to friends to lovers type beat, i know they wouldn't get along as their step 1 selves. cove would be pretty put off by how loud and wild tam was at first. plus, neither of them would really like the same activities as the other

tamarack finds the beach boring and stagnant because she's a forest girlie and it isn't like cove is one to just be in the forest and forage mushrooms all day. but during one night when cove tries running away, strangely enough it's the loud girl he doesn't normally enjoy being with sticking with him the whole time and a friendship is birthed from that

step 2, cove is so there for tamarack when she is dealing with everything with her parents. and by step 3, he's telling tamarack he's been in love with with her since they were teens

chef's kiss, cove/tamarack hits different

step 1 derek sees this:

and immediately falls in love, i don't think i need to expand further on that. y'all know how derek is and i feel like everything i said about cove comforting tam can be applied here as well. he'd try to shoot his shot with making a marriage promise with tam too i see it very clearly

and, don't get mad at me for repeating myself but

step 1 derek sees this:

and immediately falls in love. but since qiu is a popular kid, good luck, my guy. at least derek can rest assured knowing that qiu's his good buddy and slightly more special than the rest. i think with qiu he might feel too nervous to do the marriage promise thing since qiu is a popular kid and who knows if he's already received a ton of those

in a scenario where they aren't close as step 1 folk though or qiu pushes derek away during their step 2 phase, derek is hurt but he still tries putting in the effort to rebuild that bridge, letting qiu know he's there regardless of what they're going through until finally... qiu reaches back

they had their ups and their downs but qiu appreciates derek not giving up on them and sticking with them through the hard times

by the time qiu is back to their normal rizzler self, derek's busy with sports and it is hard for them to meet up with each other but they stay in contact. but step 4 would be when they get together because derek let's it drop he had a crush on qiu when they were kids "haha definitely over it NOW though" (he is not)

qiu gains a crush on derek between steps 2 and 3 but never said anything because they kinda felt after being such a jerk to derek during a good chunk of high school, he doesn't deserve to pursue him but after hearing derek had a crush on him qiu decides they're gonna shoot their shot (happy ending ofc though)

i'm leaving terry and randy out of this though, they're too fucking cute for me to separate

#look she's answering #anon #our life #our life: beginnings & always #our life: now & forever #olba #olnf #elizabeth last #cove holden #baxter ward #derek suarez #lee last #ren murray #qiu lin #tamarack baumann #opal second #cliff holden #our life vianca #ol vianca #our life serenity #ol serenity

[zeroducks-2]

tell us about the nasty Slade man from TT03

since you guys (and @exhausted-pigeon) asked, here's me talking about iconic Teen Titans 2003 Slade :D

Disclaimer right here. Unlike a lot of fortunate folks, I did not have Teen Titans available to watch back then (I really missed out, especially cause I was in my pre-teen years and that would have been The Perfect Show for me at that point). This means that I only got to watch tt03 recently, therefore these thoughts don't come from someone who holds the show dear as a childhood memory, and who fell in love with it a long time ago, who had their christening to DC stuff through that and yada yada.

I'll therefore discuss tt03 Slade without personal/emotional involvement, and keeping in mind that tt03 is indeed a show intended for a young audience. I'll be adding screenshots for poignancy, so it's going to be a pretty long post :)

End of disclaimer, now onto the good shit.

So, what to say about Slade. Fans have been calling him downright devious, the Teenagers Tormentor, A True Menace To Society, a master manipulator, and a child predator even if there's nothing *too* explicit being that this is a show for kids.

(not that kids being the target audience stopped them showing Slade sleeping with Tara in NTT back in the '80s, but that's a conversation for another time)

Do I think that any of this is true? The answer is essentially yes, I agree with all of the above.

Slade is a very fun character, and his presence dominates the scene every time he's on screen. He's a solid villain, one that feels truly threatening for the protagonists (and not like a forgettable bad guy who can be overpowered with The Power Of Friendship™), and he fits perfectly with the dynamic of the show. He will do the most ridiculous corny things, like materializing at random in a corner of a panoramic wheel cart, while the wheel is in motion, right when Terra and Beast Boy are about to kiss (just to ruin their night basically).

I tried to find a gif cause this scene is too funny but sadly I didn't manage.

But he will also (and mostly) do fucked up shit which people nowadays argue as not belonging in a kid show, like grooming teenagers and/or forcing them to work for him.

His design is also easily iconic, and he's huge in bulk compared to the tiny, slender kid protagonists, adding to the threatening vibe.

I mean look at that Raven's a mushroom compared to him

But he's not a monster - you know he's a human being while you're watching the show, whether you imagine an eyepatch and silver hair like comicbooks!Slade or you picture a completely different kind of face on him, you still know he's just a man... or is he.

The show subtly toys with the idea that Slade might not be human after all. His face is never shown - every single time one of the characters manages to overpower him and unmask him, they find out that they've been fighting against a robot.

This happens after a fight so violent Robin almost dies by falling off a building, and SLADE HIMSELF saves him - reason being more or less "I'm not done kicking your ass". Eventually Robin manages to overpower him, takes off his mask, and lo and behold:

Slade wasn't even there the whole time.

Also, he seems to live in some sort of lab filled with complicated tech and huge gears that spin into nothing. Does this man even need to sleep, eat or drink?

What is this place and how high is the rent

I love what he did with the huge gears it's so ambient

All of this contributes to the threatening, mysterious aura surrounding the character. Which at times can turn into outright terrifying despite the show being relatively lighthearted. Pretty soon the narrative manages to establish the fact that Slade is nearly impossible to beat, that he will do anything to bring down the protagonists (or bring them under his control), and that you can always expect the worst from him.

But the most interesting aspect to discuss is for most people the child predator vibes this character has from his first appearance throughout the entirety of the show. And to whoever says "you can't tell me that they didn't do this intentionally", well, consider two things

1 - Slade in the comicbooks did sleep with a 15yo, in order to use her to bring down the Titans. So like, the fact that he *might* sleep with kids isn't much of a far-fetched hypothesis and 2 - The way he acts goes beyond the average "well this is a kids show of course the villain will act in weird ways towards kids".

Let me expand a little on this second point. When the protagonist of a story is a kid, the villain that will try to hurt/kill them is not automatically a child predator or a child abuser, only because he hurts a kid. In the context of that story it makes sense that the villain will act as if the protag was an adult - the story was created with a young audience in mind, and if other characters treated the protag like a child it would break their immersion.

So is this the case with Slade? Well yes, but actually no. There obviously is a case of "he treats the characters like adults cause it's a kids show" but does he, really? Slade works with the fact that the characters are kids, therefore inexperienced and easy to manipulate. He also wants an apprentice, which necessarily has to be young. In Terra's case, he plays on her insecurities and her need for someone to teach her and guide her. And then there's the way the scenes are directed and the creepiness factor of just how this man interacts with these kids that rightfully puts him in the creep zone, regardless of what exactly the story will show in terms of explicit details.

For this to make more sense I need to make examples, so let's dive in a little deeper starting with Fans Favorite's ... *drumroll* ...

The Apprentice Arc

It starts out with Slade contacting the Titans to tell them that he planted a bomb in the city. Robin, who's already obsessing at the point of waking up drenched in sweat after nightmares where he and Slade beat the shit out of each other, snaps into action to retrieve the trigger of the bomb.

Tis Robin waking up in his "Pepe Silvia" room dedicated to Slade after a nightmare, for your viewing pleasure.

So off the kids go, and while Robin chases Slade, the rest of the team goes try and dismantle the bomb. Slade tosses Robin around for a while, and when Robin manages to grab the remote control, Slade reveals that this is not a remote control because there is no bomb at all - rather, the rest of the Titans have just gotten hit with a laser beam that infected them with nanomachines. Now Robin has to do Slade's bidding and become his apprentice; if he refuses, or disobeys, Slade will use a button to inflict pain and potentially kill the other Titans, thanks to those nanomachines.

These are said nanomachines attached to the Titans' blood cells, conveniently displayed in huge ass screens. I love this scene so much it's so SERIOUS and SO CORNY at the same time lmao.

What ensues is Robin being forced to become Slade's apprentice, dressed in a cute replica of Slade's own suit,

And meanwhile Slade tosses him around either for the funsies or because Robin dares do something he doesn't like. Explicitly saying that he wants Robin to call him "Master". Please go watch the scene, it's 7 seconds long but it conveys EVERYTHING. This mf calls Robin "good boy" in the most condescending way you can ever imagine. Here, click this, I promise you won't be disappointed.

Here's Slade beating up a child for your viewing pleasure.

So at some point Robin is ordered to infiltrate Wayne Enterprise. The Titans try to stop him, Slade pushes for him to fight them, but baby doesn't want to especially when Starfire refuses to engage him. Slade not only starts to torture them with the nanomachines, forcing Robin to shoot them, but when kiddo gets back to him he receives the ass-whooping of his life, followed by this scene:

Here Slade is basically saying "I'm going to put you in your place in a way that will stick", but the scene is conveniently cut by the arrival of the rest of the Titans.

Robin has the idea of infecting himself with the nanomachines, so now if Slade wants to kill them, he has to kill him too. And Slade... tosses away the button, discarding the nanomachines plan on the spot, because the point REALLY was having Robin as an apprentice. If he can't have him, then there's no point.

Then there's Terra's Arc in Season 2, which goes more or less like this:

The Titans meet Terra, a kid their age who's very strong (she can manipulate the earth) but can't perfectly control her own powers. She's very self-conscious about this and when Beast Boy finds out, she begs him not to tell anyone, which he promises.

Soon after she gets singled out by Slade, who corners her and starts poking and prodding about how weak she is, unable to control her powers, and how her "new friends" will soon find out and once they do, they will discard her.

Honestly the fact that he's so big and Terra's itty bitty teeny tiny really adds to the overall creepiness of this scene. They're blocked in a cave underground btw, and to hammer the point home Slade starts tossing her around until she completely freaks out and almost buries herself under the rubble.

Soon after that, Robin deduces by himself that Terra isn't in complete control of her powers, but Terra thinks that Beast Boy snitched on her after promising he wouldn't say anything. Hurt and betrayed she runs away, and guess who she runs to?

As far as I remember, the amount of time Terra spends with Slade is nondescript. But what she says is that he trained her, taught her to not be afraid of her own powers (which is true, she can control her powers now), and gave her a purpose and direction. She comes back and infiltrates the Titans, now being a well groomed little spy, but despite her efforts Slade keeps being abusive and beats the living hell out of her when she comes back to him after a failed mission. He can puppeteer her through the suit she's wearing, but at some point she manages to break free of his control and the arc ends tragically with Terra killing Slade, and herself.

Is this the end of it then? Nuh-huh. Here comes the

Whatever the fuck is happening to Robin Arc

So Slade is dead. But at some point during a fight, Robin starts seeing him and chasing him, getting a mild ass-whoop like he normally would. His teammates are obviously confused but they comply when Robin tells them to go defuse these bombs that Slade planted - only there are no bombs. And it looks like Robin is the only one who can even see Slade.

The situation escalates at the point of Robin having to be strapped to a bed because he was literally killing himself while "fighting Slade", despite being the only one who could see him. Slade himself is the one that frees him from the restraints, and keeps beating him within an inch of his life, at the point that Robin starts begging.

And here we have what's probably the most memorable line of the whole show: "I am the thing that keeps you up at night. I am the evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest and neither will you."

What is happening here in theory is that Robin got dosed with toxic dust coming from Slade's mask, therefore he's seeing things and his brain is in so much stress that he might die from strain (he ends up saving himself by turning on the light). But taking into consideration what happened during the Apprentice arc, it's easy to see parallels with PTSD.

There is actually more. There's Slade being resurrected by Trigon and going rapey on Raven (you've seen the screenshot before) by tearing off her cape, and there's also an epic moment in which Slade goes to hell, WITH ROBIN'S HELP, to retrieve his own body and aid in the fight against Trigon. But I think my point already came across well enough:

Teen Titans 2003 Slade is a fucking creep, and compared to him, NTT Deathstroke is a sweet little lamb who wouldn't hurt a fly. Which is why it is so funny to me when people claim tt03 Slade is "better cause he never slept with a teenager" - Boy oh boy, you might have not seen it on screen but the subtext is clear as day.

This man has no moral code, no bounds (other than what the PG rating of the show will place on him) and not an ounce of humanity. I don't need to see no scene with half naked kids smoking cigarettes with only a bathrobe as clothing (like this one) to know what this man did.

#long post #Slade #teen titans 2003 #my asks #thank you for asking folks it was my pleasure to talk about this horrible horrible man #they don't make villains like these anymore #and to be honest they never did before #Slade is one of a kind

[whiskey-tango-matcha]

Go Home

I’m back with more snide restaurant coworker bullshit. No plot, just vibes - I used 3 different prompt posts in this, this one, this one, and this one, which are all just *chefs kiss*. Unbetad, unedited, just a big pile of garbage I threw together and shamelessly present unto you all. Hope you guys enjoy :)

In case you didn’t read my first story posted here, Elijah is a restaurant owner/General Manager and Greyson is a chef. That’s all you really need to follow along lmao. 

Go Home

“Greyson. Go home.”

Greyson’s head snapped up and his eyes locked with his boss’s as Elijah breezed out of the office and into the kitchen. “Why would I go home?”

“You’re sick. You have a cold.”

Greyson let his jaw fall open in mock aghast, put down his knife and placed a hand on his chest as if he needs to center himself after such an indoctrination. “I do not. How dare you. Why would you say that?”

Elijah rolled his eyes at the chef’s theatrics and placed his phone and laptop on the prep table where Greyson was working. “I say it because I’ve been here not even three minutes and the only things I’ve heard out of your mouth are sneezes and coughs.” He picked his things back up and poked the chef in the chest. “Go home.”

“That’s not even true, we just had a full conversa- HFTSHH-uhh!” Greyson caught the sneeze in an elbow, hastily brought to his face at the last moment. Elijah bleated out a laugh as he pushed through the kitchen doors and into the server’s station. “Bad timing!” Greyson called behind him.

“Go home!”

***

Greyson wasn’t about to just go home.

It was January, which meant it was painfully slow in the restaurant, but that didn’t mean he had nothing to do. They had a few big events coming up, and his team was only just recovering from some nasty bug that had taken them down one by one through the busy holidays. The guys needed the support of their chef, and Greyson certainly wasn’t one to take a sick day when his team needed him – especially when he wasn’t even sick.

“Huhh...huhETSHH-ue! Fuck me,” Greyson said, turning away from his prep station to sneeze into his shoulder for what felt like the millionth time that day. He walked to the sink nearest to him, pulled out a paper towel, and wiped his nose before washing his hands. He definitely wasn’t sick, but whatever was making him sneeze like it was his job was really starting to piss him off.

There were still several hours til service began, so Greyson decided to work on some new menu recon while he had a few moments of down time. The mushroom risotto dish he’d spent some time on still wasn’t quite there yet, but he’d tasted it so many times it had turned to mush in his mouth. Greyson scooped the less-than-perfect dish into a deli container and went out in search of his boss.

He knocked on the open office door at the front of the kitchen, where Elijah was seated and working on a schedule. Greyson scooped a bit of risotto onto a spoon and held it out. “Hey, boss, can you give this a taste?”

“I most certainly cannot,” Elijah said, not looking away from his work. Greyson couldn’t help but laugh.

“Uh...any particular reason why?”

Elijah raised his eyebrows and lolled his head to the side to look at the chef. “Two reasons, actually. One, you aren’t supposed to be here, so I’m ignoring you. And two -”

“Onesec – HGSTHH-ue! HRSHH-uh! Shit, sorry, ’scuse me, go on,” Greyson rubbed his nose on his shoulder and Elijah gave him a look of revulsion.

“Two,” he continued, pointedly placing a box of tissues at the end of the desk, facing Greyson, “I’m not eating off of your spoon because, as I have said, you are sick.”

Greyson rolled his eyes and held the spoon closer to Elijah’s face. “C’mon, man, I need some feedback.” He sniffled, trying not to sound pathetic. “Please?”

“If I try it, will you go home?”

“Probably not.”

Huffing exasperatedly, Elijah grabbed a fork off of the plate that had held his lunch earlier and stuck it pointedly into the deli container Greyson was holding. He took a bite while looking into Greyson’s red-rimmed eyes. “More parmesan,” he said, putting the fork back on the used plate beside him. “And too much truffle oil. Now go home.”

Greyson smiled and grabbed a tissue from the box Elijah had placed before him. “Thanks, boss,” he said, shoving the tissue in his pants pocket. “Can always count on y-yuhh...HGTSHH-uhh! Snf. Coundt ond you,” he finished, stuffily. Elijah glanced at the chef, eyebrows raised as if to say, you ready to admit defeat yet? Greyson just shrugged.

“I’ll take sombe claritin,” Greyson said lamely, pulling the tissue back out of his pocket and wiping his nose. “I’mb ndot sick.”

Elijah looked back at his computer. “Whatever you say, Grey.”

***

Whoever the fuck had given him this shit was about to feel his wrath.

...not that he was sick or anything.

It was four pm and the cooks were all sitting at the back of the kitchen eating staff meal before the restaurant opened. Alternatively, Greyson was crouched on hands and knees in his office, cursing under his breath while he searched for the ibuprofen he and Elijah kept in one of these drawers.

He figured it was most likely his sous chef, Matt who was the culprit. Kid couldn’t cover his mouth if you forced him with a gun to his head, and he’d been so sick on New Year’s that Greyson forced him to go to urgent care at the end of the night. Fucking Matt. Didn’t he know better than to come to work si -

“HuhETSHHue! GTSHH-uh! HRRSTCHH-oo! Fuck.”

Greyson abandoned his search for ibuprofen in lieu of the rapidly depleting tissue box on the desk. He pulled himself back into his desk chair and reached for the box -

Only to see Elijah holding it hostage at the entrance to their office.

“You’re not going to eat?” Elijah asked. Greyson, whose nose had begun running in earnest post-sneezing, gave a lame eye roll from behind his hand.

“Ndot hungry. Give mbe the tissues, please.”

���Oh, these?” Elijah asked, holding up the box theatrically. “Why ever would you need these? I mean, you’re so clearly well and spry. Healthy as a horse as they say.”

“Dude, just give them to mbe. Shouldn’t you be in pre-shift?”

“I was coming to get you for pre-shift, you bozo,” Elijah said, tossing the tissues at Greyson. “But now I’m beginning to question if the servers would even be able to understand what you’re saying.”

Greyson gratefully blew his nose facing away from Elijah and tossed the tissues in the trash. “Fuck directly off, Lij,” he said, the words punctuated with a hoarse cough. “I’m coming. Give me two minutes.”

“I’ll give you two days, how about that?” Elijah said, turning to leave the kitchen. “Go. Home.”

Greyson stood, reinvigorated by fury. “Fuck. Off,” he said in the same cadence as his boss. “I’m fine.”

Elijah threw his arms up in defeat and held the swinging door open for the chef. “C’mon, then,” he said, gesturing Greyson towards the dining room. “Let’s go infect my entire staff.”

***

An hour into service, Greyson felt his phone buzz. Twice.

It wasn’t a busy service – people were out of money post-holiday it seemed – so Greyson was working on menu ideas and scheduling in the office while Matt held down the line and his cooks did some deep cleaning. Or, he was attempting to do scheduling between bouts of -

“Huhhh...HGTSSHH-ue! HRRSHH! HPTSSH-oo!”

“Bless, Chef,” Matt called to him from the line. Greyson flipped him the bird and pulled his once-again-vibrating phone from his pocket. Who the fuck was blowing him up? Everyone he knew was here.

Greyson wiped under his nose with a tissue and unlocked his phone. Eight new messages – all from Elijah. Jesus Christ. Was his boss really that lazy that he couldn’t walk the twenty steps from the dining room to the kitchen?

Greyson opened their text thread and immediately rolled his eyes.

5:21PM

Bless you.

Bless you.

5:46PM

Bless you.

You know everyone out here can hear you.

5:59PM

Bless you.

Bless you.

6:12PM

Bless.

Ok, seriously you sound like fuckin shit.

Greyson felt his face go hot as he typed out and sent his response.

6:15PM

Fuck off, Lij.

“HTSHHH-uhhh. Godammit.”

Greyson pulled the last tissue out of the box and blew his nose. So maybe he was kind of sick. A little bit. Nothing he couldn’t handle. He was a grown man for God’s sake, he couldn’t deal with a little cold at work?

The chef rubbed a hand down his face and used all his willpower not to groan. A little cold. A few hours left of work. A slow evening. If anyone could handle it, it was him.

***

Greyson was fairly sure he’d never been more miserable in his entire life.

It was ten pm, and the last table had finally cleared the building; not that Greyson would’ve known it. The chef was holed up in the employee bathroom, finally taking a minute to himself to blow his nose and wash his hands. What was supposed to have been a quiet night had suddenly picked up around seven – and with it, so did his cold.

He wasn’t sure how it worked out this way, but the moment five tickets printed at the same time on the line, Greyson felt the first whisper of a fever slither up his neck and make itself home behind both of his eyes. The tickets had continued to print, much to his chagrin, and after a few moments Matt had turned to his boss with panic in his eyes and frantically called, “Chef?!”

Greyson did what he was trained to; he pulled it together and hopped on the line to help his guys. He cooked and shouted orders and garnished and sent food out. He remade steaks when they came back overcooked, and he apologized when he yelled at his grill cook, who was new and clearly petrified. He ignored the massive headache blooming in his temples, and his cooks ignored the near-constant volley of sneezes he smothered into the inside collar of his chef coat. It was a rough one. Ticket times weren’t what they should’ve been, and he definitely screamed at his cooks more times than they deserved.

But it was over. And now, hours later, he stumbled out of the employee bathroom and into the office and slammed his ass into the chair, fully and completely spent. To his left, he felt Elijah’s hand firmly place itself on his shoulder.

“You killed it tonight. Truly,” Elijah said, his voice low. “We’re lucky to have you.”

Greyson looked at his boss, defeated. “I was an ass,” he said, his voice congested and hoarse. “I’m a dick. I yelled at Juan, and it wasn’t even his fault. Ticket times were trash. I wasn’t on top of it the way I should’ve been and I – huh…HUGTSSH-uhh! HUHESHHHOO!” Greyson swiped angrily under his nose and pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes. “And I have a fuckigg cold.”

Elijah sat silently for a moment, and Greyson figured he was getting ready to gloat or make some sort of snide comment about how he knew Greyson was sick, and Greyson was an idiot for being there at all, but instead he heard his boss get up and leave the office. Greyson looked up from his hands after a few minutes of silence to see Elijah standing over him with a new box of tissues and a bottle of whiskey.

“I know,” he said, sitting down and pushing both of his peace offerings towards Greyson. “But you did it anyway. And that’s badass.”

Greyson had to swallow the lump in his throat before he could look his boss in the eye again. “You’re a kndow-it-all prick,” he said, taking a tissue and unscrewing the whiskey cap. He took a swig, and blew his nose, unsure what else to say.

“I’m aware,” Elijah replied. “But I’m right.”

Greyson looked at his boss and managed a smile. “I thindk…I mbay have to call out tomorrow.”

Elijah couldn’t help but laugh. “Grey,” he said, “if I see your ass in this building anytime before the weekend, I’ll send you home in a bodybag.”

This time, it was Greyson’s turn to laugh. “Honestly...body bag doesn’t sound too bad at this poindt.”

Elijah smiled and pushed the whiskey towards the chef once more. “Get yourself nice and drunk, chef. I’ll drive you home.”

#snz #snz kink #sneezeblr #sneezefic #sickfic #male sneeze #cold #snz fic #snzfic #male cold #coldfic #original character #snez #snzblr #whiskeyswriting

[mxtxmusings]

svsss characters as hozier songs

bingqiu weird mushroom time - in a week

and you haven’t moved an inch / such that i would not know / if you sleep always like this / the flesh calmly going cold

you cannot tell me this doesn’t give major binghe shizun is not dead i can bring him back vibes

this whole song is just essentially that entire arc

sqh literally complained about bingqiu being too cottagecore

what is more cottagecore than just rotting in the woods next to your lover

we lay here for years or for hours / your hand in my hand / so still and discreet / so long we become the flowers

mushroom sqq

honestly there’s no particular line that stands out to me

besides the refrain i’ll be home with you

i can already imagine the bamboo house

there’s just something so macabre but also tender about this song

PLUS IT’S A DUET

THIS SONG WAS LITERALLY MADE FOR THEM YOUR HONOUR

bingqiu post abyss - as it was

just as it was, baby / before the otherness came

and tell me if somehow / some of it remained / how long you would wait for me? / how long i’ve been away

the idea of a haggard hero who comes home and is greeted by their lover

and comforted by their unchanging love for them

it’s what binghe wishes he could have gotten after he fights his way out of the abyss

but strangely i think the hero coming home is actually shen qingqiu in some ways

lbh came home literally but it is sqq who realizes that he never changed

aka binghe is still a simp

i keep on putting bingqiu together

shang qinghua - be

when the man who gives the order / is born next time ‘round on the boat sent back

when i have no kind words left, love for you

be as you’ve always been (lover be good to me)

if this whole song doesn’t scream shang qinghua during the side stories

idk how to help you

there’s literally a part about when the master is crossed

he literally begs mobei jun to treat him better like idk how to tell you how obvious these parallels are

the energy is 100% different though

but i like that mobei-jun doesn’t magically change or feel different about sqh

turns out their dynamic is just weird as fuck

even jesus can’t take the wheel of their relationship

your honour they are simply incompetent and incapable of proper communication despite one of them being a demon general and the other one being god

mobei-jun - blood upon the snow

the world that hardens as the harsher winter holds / the parent forced to eat its young before it grows

it’s not my arms that will fail me / but this world takes more strength than it gave me

are you seeing the vision

i mean it’s pretty obvious from the cover art

and also the general vibes

the song talks a lot about the brutality of nature, of the world, and how difficult it is to survive

there is a sense of isolation in the song, as though it is better not to get close than to be hurt because that is all they have ever experienced

honestly felt like the whole situation with mobei-jun’s uncle and also his general distrust of people

liu qingge - shrike

i couldn’t utter my love when it counted / ah, but i’m singing like a bird ‘bout it now

this is more about blaming yourself for a breakup

even though that relationship wasn’t always positive, there were still good aspects to it that are missed

but in this case, i see it more as the regret of not even trying

also because i think lqg is incapable of winning i’m so sorry

you snooze you lose

not like he could compete against the protagonist but man didn’t even try

it may seem like i always bully him (which i do) but fun fact he is one of my favourites

bro literally fumbled so bad with sqq though i’m sorry how does he have negative rizz

yue qingyuan - foreigner’s god

she feels no control of her body / she feels no safety in my arms

you cannot tell me that this doesn’t feel like his relationship with both shen jiu and shen yuan

except not literally cheating but yknow

like the vibes are all there istg

i promise all of the pieces are there

i just can’t explain it

like he lost sj when he left him and then he loses him again after the qi deviation

it’s just hopelessly hanging onto somebody that you never had to begin with yknow

and i mean shen yuan is technically a foreigner…

tianlang-jun - jackie and wilson

looking up from a cigarette, and she’s already left / i start digging up the yard for what’s left of me and our little vignette

i think this song really depends on your interpretation of it!

i’ve seen people say it’s about a person who fell in love with this woman and begins to fantasize about a future with her only for her to not return their feelings

or they are disappointed by the idealized version of a woman they have created in their head, only to realize that they’re not interested in the real person

i think the first one is definitely more accurate to his situation with su xiyan but i could see the second one working too when he thinks that she betrayed him?

either way the naive love from this song felt like the right fit for our resident teenage girl stuck in a dilf demon’s body

#Spotify #luo binghe #mxtx svsss #shen qingqiu #mxtx fandom #svsss #tianlang jun #mxtx books #shang qinghua #bingqiu #mxtx #yue qingyuan #liu qingge #peerless cucumber #airplane shooting towards the sky #hozier #wasteland baby #svsss novel #mobei jun #i am probably missing a bunch #and this may not be correct #god knows #there are many interpretations of hozier songs

[stardroptasteslikesocialism]

Rockstar!Eddie and Alt-pop!reader weren’t looking for a rebound.

Manhattan, NY | December 1989.

“Look, Gareth, I’m not in the mood.”

Gareth sighed as he watched his friend sit alone on the beaten tour bus sofa, strumming his beloved BC Rich mindlessly.

“I’m saying this as your friend, Ed:  you need to get out of here. We can’t deal with watching you mope around over Jess anymore.”

Eddie huffed at his friend, “What makes you think this is about Jess?”

“Oh, nothing,” Gareth sighed, “Just the fact that you’ve played her mixtape nonstop since Thanksgiving. Or the fact that your ass doesn’t leave this couch unless we’re playing. Or maybe, maybe it’s the fact that you booted her song - that got us on the Billboard I might add - off our set list.”

The mindless strums quieted as Eddie rested his head against the tour bus wall behind him and sighed.

‘Look, I know you loved her, dude,” Gareth slumped into the empty spot next to his friend, “But sometimes, y’know, chicks just can’t do the long distance thing. She kind of had a point, you know.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow, waiting on Gareth’s point.

“We’re not kids anymore, Ed,” Gareth shrugged, “If she wants to settle down in Hawkins like everyone else our age, she has a right to. It’s not fair to drag out what’s not meant to be if you both are miserable. Face it, even when you were together you still moped because you missed her. Tell me I’m wrong. I dare you.”

Eddie sat silent. Gareth wasn’t wrong; about any of it.

“Look, Jeff’s buddy invited us out to this hole-in-the-wall club in Hell’s Kitchen. Some kind of artsy, hippie shit. Thought it’d be cool.”

A quick snort of air left Eddie’s nostrils as he mulled it over. Artsy, hippie shit sounded like code for mushrooms and weed, which he could’ve honestly used more of in that moment. 

“You know what? Fine,” Eddie slapped either side of the worn leather as he hopped off the sofa, “Not like I got anything to lose anymore, right?”

Gareth grinned and clapped Eddie’s back, “Let’s get you to the Land of the Living, Munson.”

It didn’t take long for Eddie to realize this club was completely different from what he was expecting. Instead of the loud, psychedelic club scene he’d been used to this tour, the club gave a starving poet’s vibe; aside from the worn graffiti on the brick walls, this place could easily double as a coffee shop (which, Eddie found out later from the bartender, it did during the day). Eddie could’ve easily brushed this place off and sulked back to the tour bus; but a unique voice, what Eddie would classify as an airy rasp, radiated from the speakers, directing his gaze to an absolute angel sitting at an antique piano in the corner of the bar.

“What’s up, guys?” You casually asked into the mic. A couple regulars called back and gave a brief applause, “Thanks for coming out tonight. I’m back again with some new stuff I’ve been working on.”

Eddie barely took his eyes off you long enough to order an old fashioned. The melody that flowed through your fingers to the keys to the speakers left him speechless. It was light, with an air of melancholy; something Eddie could relate to all too well. He fixated on the loose curls that framed your face; your large doe eyes the stars of the show before you’d started singing. Then it was your pillowy lips, painted a deep merlot. And your voice.

Goddamn, Man Child. 

You fucked me so good that I almost said ‘I love you’.

That lyric earned a couple wolf whistles from the crowd.

You’re fun, and you’re wild. 

But you don’t know the half of the shit that you put me through.

As you continued, Gareth glanced at his friend whose gaze never left you.

Your poetry’s bad and you blame the news.

But I can’t change that and I can’t change your mood.

‘Cuz you’re just a man. It’s just what you do.

Your head in your hands

As you color me blue.

Eddie could feel the gutteral pain in your words, disguised in such a delicate tune. He stayed in his trance until the song was over and you were met with polite applause. Eddie joined, albeit a little more loudly.

“Thank you,” you waved to the crowd, “You have no idea how much your support means to me. Look, we got some other great talent here, tonight. Be sure to show them and our barkeep, Jim, some love too. Good night!”

In the mere seconds it took for him to down the whiskey in his glass, a voice from behind made him jump.

“Well, of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, Corroded Coffin walks into mine.”

Eddie turned around, struck dumb by your presence before him.

“Uh, uh - yeah. Jeff, our drummer, invited us over,” Eddie stammered as you took the barstool next to him, ordering your usual from Jim. Eddie quickly gestured at Jim to put it on his tab, “I’m Eddie; Eddie Munson.”

“Oh, believe me, I know who you are,” you replied with a crooked smile, “My ex is a big fan.”

“I take it he’s the man child you were singing about?”

You nodded, quietly thanking Jim as he placed your drink on the bar, “But I gotta say, his taste in music was the one good quality about him. That song of yours, the one that’s on the charts right now-”

“Follow You?” Eddie guessed, his eyes lighting up.

“Yes! I actually really liked it. Definitely didn’t expect it from a bunch of metalheads.”

Eddie laughed at the (hopefully) unintentional jab, “I mean, what can I say? Us metalheads have feelings, too. Imagine that?”

“Did you write that?” You asked, taking a sip of your vodka soda. Eddie nodded.

“Yeah, yeah. That was me. I wrote it for my girl at the time, but I guess once it started hitting the Billboard, shit just didn’t work out,” Eddie quickly ordered another drink, “She broke it off last time I was back home.”

“That sucks,” you empathized, “At least my breakup was kind of mutual.”

Eddie only nodded in agreement, trying to pry the conversation out of the hole that was their exes.

“So, what’s a pretty, young, insanely talented girl like you doing playing a spot like this?”

You paused a second before answering, “I’m a junior at NYU.”

“Damn,” Eddie replied, impressed, “What’re ya studying?”

“Classical piano and composure,” you answered casually, as if you were naming off your to-do list, “Not sure if it’ll go anywhere, but I like the idea of making music. That’s why I play here in my downtime. It’s nice to play something other than Beethoven and Chopin every once in a while.”

“Are you kidding me?” Eddie asked, bewildered, “You’re incredible!” You raised an eyebrow at him, “I - I mean, your music - is, is incredible. What I heard out there? I could see that charting way above Follow You instantly.”

“Oh, I’m sure you say that to every musician you talk up at a bar,” you joked.

“No, I’m serious. Look,” Eddie swiftly grabbed a pen off Jim and a bar napkin and started scribbling, “My manager, Dave, knows some higher ups. He’s more used to managing shitheads like Corroded Coffin, but he could pull some strings if you’re interested,” he slid a napkin with a phone number scrawled across it, “There’s the number to their City office, if you want to set up a demo.”

You stare at the napkin, shocked, before sliding it into your purse, “Thank you. I’ll think about it.”

Eddie stood stunned as you grabbed the pen from him and started writing on your bar napkin, “And here’s my number. Maybe we could get together next time you’re in the city.”

“How ‘bout New Years Eve?” Eddie asked, “Got any plans? The guys & I were just gonna go to Times Square. Y’know, do the tourist-y shit and watch the ball drop.”

You met his eyes with a genuine smile, “Sure, I’d like that.”

You agreed to meet at the bar for drinks before walking through Times Square. And that’s how you rang in 1990 with a kiss from Corroded Coffin’s front man. And that’s how you rang in every New Year since.

#rockstar!eddie munson #rockstar!eddie x reader

[borathae]

Okay now we need to know your fantasies for the other boys like come on Sibi

You can't just do that to us and then leave

We need more

Okay so, here is how I would want to spend my day with each of the guys 🥺

Joonie Boonie

Spend a day with him exploring nature. Okay listen. I love walks in my forest and looking at all the different plants and mushrooms and trees and I just wanna do that with him. Maybe we could sit somewhere and try to paint some cute mushrooms together and later it starts to rain and so we go back home and drink tea whilst reading each other poetry. And then we make out obviously because duh it's Joonie Boonie. Also alternatively I wanna follow him to an art museum and then let him tell me all about what he knows about the art & artist. Like yes please tell me all about it, I wanna fucking look at your lips as you tell me about art. And I wanna tell him about photography because that's the only art genre I really know lots about and I wanna impress him, like that's all I want for him to go "oh wow I didn't know that, thank you for telling me, I learned something new". And then we drive to some place in nature with our bikes and make out under a tree.

Jinnie Bibbi

Spend a day with him in the most comfortable clothes ever and then play games with him. Like tbfh? I would already be happy if I could only watch him game while I'm on my phone and every now and then we would chat about something random or the game or I show him a funny tiktok and he laughs. And then we cook food together and eat it whilst chatting about our days. Like I just wanna lounge around with him, play games, cook and talk. I feel like he is perfect for that. I know it may sound boring to some but that type of day is just ideal in my eyes.

Yoongie Boongie

Cuddle him all day bro and play with his hair hahhaah. No but on a more serious note, I seriously just wanna coexist with him? Like we're both on the couch, close enough that our bodies touch and we do our own things but every now and then we reach out for the other and touch innocently. I also really wanna bake something with him. Put on some music and then dance in the kitchen while we're trying to bake a cake or cookies and then once they're done we share them under a blanket and he tells him all about his newest song or some random enlightenment he had whilst showering and I can trace his face and kiss his cheeks. Also a woodworking date, idk if you guys know that about me but I actually build furniture in my freetime fadjf so I wanna do that with him too. I also wanna go on a forest walk with him because I wanna show him tiny mushrooms and go “you” and then hold his hand and kiss his blushing cheek.

Hoba Boba

I wanna go shopping with him. Get food from a random street vendor & eat it on a bench while we talk about our interests. Get boba from a shop and sip on it while we strut down the streets. Go into every shop we find interesting and show each other what we think could look good on the other person. I also really wanna go to a secondhand shop with him and then do that thing where you pick out clothes for each other. You know, where the other is like “blind” and you say stop and whatever their hand lands on, they have to wear. Yeah I wanna do that with him. And then take pictures together because obviously we’d look cute af in our new fits. 

Jiminie Miminie

Okay listen. I think that he and I would vibe so much afjdsjf like whenever they do a live and some of his real humor shines through I fucking wheeze. Like that man is so funny irl if he doesn’t have to censor himself, I am telling you. So tbfh? I just wanna hang out with him at his or mine place, order take out, open a bottle of wine and then just talk? Like I feel like we’d regularly topple over in laughter cause one of us said something borderline idiotic again which sets the other off hahahha. But if we’re really talking about activities maybe go to a fun fair and then ride too many rides until we’re both dizzy. This is obviously all a scheme just so I can hold his hand on the rollercoasters ohoho. Or go to a pottery painting class and laugh at each other’s drawings while trying not to laugh in order not to disturb the other students, which then makes us giggle even harder. No but seriously I just wanna like laugh with him? hahaha does that sound weird?

Tete Bebe

Roadtrip. I said what I said. I just wanna drive around with him, listen to music and sing to the songs. Then we stop every now and then for food or when we see an especially pretty place to take pictures at. We don’t know the destination but that doesn’t matter because quite frankly? Spending time with each other is the destination and the rest is just pretty things making the memories more vivid. I do wanna stop at somewhere high once the sun sets, just so we can oversee whatever is down below while the sun sets in the distance. Alternatively I just wanna paint with him. Listen to jazz, drink some tea and then paint next to each other. Also slow dance with him omfg please :( and, and omfg and work on a whole pictorial concept together, rent a studio and then photograph it with us obviously as the models because we’re hot like that HAHAHA. He is once again a canditate for a forest walk too because I wanna take pictures with him and see what catches his eyes. Obviously we’d use our film cameras, so that later we can develop our films together and then spend our evening scanning them and talking about them.

Googie Woogie

I think that neither of our introverted asses actually would want to leave our apartment ahhahah so I gotta say chill out date again, inside and cozied up. Bro I can’t keep saying chilling with all of them but I really do wanna chill with all of them ahahah. Listen, I’m an introvert I rarely go outside afdjsfja. But listen. We’d make it nice and romantic. With cooking first where we try to make our own pasta and it’s actually turning out great and we have a great time. And then we’d watch a Marvel movie because those are always so much mindless fun and I just wanna watch him geek out about superheroes. Also I wanna game with him, but like some sort of zombie apocalypse game like Days Gone or Last of Us and we’d take turns and I can show him how much I rock at those games when I’m mowing through the zombies easily fjadsjf. Tbfh, I’d also be fucking happy if we were watching a random Let’s Play from like Seán or Evelien and he was between my legs with his head on my chest while I play with his hair and he dozes off slowly. Also. Forest walks! I said what I said, I wanna take a walk with him too. What can I say, I’m an Austrian country girl we love our forest walks ahahah. 

So here you have it. This is how I would want to spend time with all of the boys. I seriously just wanna like talk to them and chill with them or go on walks dfjajds and I stand by that decision.

#asks #jenjensworld #fave #come talk to me

[charmixpower]

Winx Children headcannons?

I'm writing this in my notes app because I lost the answer to this ask >:(!!!! Multiple paragraphs!!!! Gone!!!

I don't have any fan kids Oc's but I do have some ideas about kids (written with next gen au's in mind, so for the purposes of this response, they all want kids)

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

🐉Bloom: I think Bloom was very happy as an only child, Mike and Vanessa supremacy, and would probably want to just remake her childhood for her children. She has thought a lot about two kids however, bc she loves Daphne and likes the idea of her kid having a sibling bc Daphne. She's not completely set on anything

🤴Sky: he'd definitely want two kids. Sky was a very lonely and unhappy child who's parents were distant and cold, especially with Sky being Royal and needing to keep up appreances? Yeah he was isolated as a kid. He really doesn't want his kids to grow up having no one around they can talk freely too, so two kids. Anymore sounds nerve wracking tho

👑Skloom: they end up having two out of worry that being the crown heir to the Domino throne, with connections to Eraylon, would be very isolating in a "everyone wants to use me" kind of way. One of their kids has to be the witch/fairy of the dragon fire, and the other one is probably non-magical/a specialist

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

🌘Stella: She wants a big family. Like, none of these kids will ever be fucking alone ever, levels of big. She grew up incredibly lonely and emotionally neglected and Chimera being adopted into her family is the best familial thing that has ever happened to her. Chimera is the only member of her family she's close with, and Stella refuses to deprive her future children of having siblings

🛡️Brandon: Brandon comes off as a family man to me. Just observe how he manages all of his idiots, this man is an amazing babysitter. I think he'd want multiple kids just bc he likes kids, it's not very deep lol

✨Brella: Stella will at least have four kids (her family is slightly larger than Flora's). Many powers ideas; the witch/fairy of the second Sun of Solaria/shining Sun, the witch/fairy of celestial lights, the witch fairy of colors, the witch/fairy of eclipses, and the witch/fairy of the night. Of course they'd have non-magical kids as well

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

💐Flora: she's motherly, she loves kids, she comes from a big family (cannon is wrong, Flora has multiple siblings. It's the vibes, can't explain). Local woman wants multiple kids, and that's it

🖋️Helia: has no preference, has no opnion. He'd be perfectly happy childless, as he'd be perfectly happy with a big family. He likes kids, but also likes his space and freedom. He has no stance

🧙‍♀️Mirta: I think she'd want to err on the smaller side, simply because she's anxious as fuck and worried she'd be unable to handle that many kids. But if the kids are spaced out enough her worries would be completely assuaged

🏞️Florelia/Mirora: Flora will always end up with least three kids. Helia is a transman and Mirta is a woman, so I don't think bio kids are in the cards here. Like theoretically with shape shifting and other types of magic it could be possible but I'm imagining that's still a new frontier and Flora wouldn't want to take the risk, especially when she can just adopt. Especially because she (and the rest of her siblings) are adopted. The magical core of a planet affects the way a child's magical core will develop (see me and @/mu5a making headcanons based on eachothers headcanons based on—) so any fairy they happen to adopt will have nature powers if they're from Lymphea. Most of the kids would likely be nonmagical (as magical children are rare) but Flora/Mirta might be able to sense magical children and adopt them so they can be raised in a family that can help them deal with their growing in powers. Ideas include; the fairy/witch of flowers, the fairy/witch of mushrooms, the fairy/witch of growth/life. Ya know. Nature stuff. Lympha

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

🧑‍💻Tenca: if Tecna is going to have a child, she is going to have exactly one. Multiple children is stressful and time consuming, and pregnancy is completely awful. She's adopting one child, her little data byte, and not dealing with all that horrible crimes to her body thank you

🔫Timmy: he wants kids but he doesn't exactly know how many he wants. He comes from a big family so he tends to think on the bigger side but he'd be worried about being overwhelmed

📑Tecmy: They have one child. I'm thinking like; the fairy/witch of information/data (which was what Tecna's magic would of been if it was allowed to develop naturally), the fairy/witch of electricity, or the fairy/witch precision

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

🎧Musa: She had a very happy and good childhood right up until her mother died, then she became incredibly lonely as a child, so I think she'd just concentrate all of her emotional energy into one child and giving them all the love she can muster, like her mom did for her. She wouldn't actually mind having more than one child at all, it's just that one is what she's use to so she's more comfortable with the idea

⚔️Riven: I also think he'd want just one kid. Most of his childhood problems stemmed from having parents that didn't give a shit about him, so having one kid to focus on seems like the obvious choice to him. Tho he is a bit worried about having kids, and he and Musa take a lot of parenting classes before he feels comfortable having them. He's always wanted a family, he's also eternally worried he will fuck it up. (He secretly wants more than one, Riven I think would of been family oriented if he had a family he could orient himself around, but hes definitely worried about not being able to handle it. One child would be easier to deal with, so one child is the more senseical choice)

🎙️Rivusa: I think they'd have one fairy child and one witch child in non identical twins. (Yes, I am implying they planned for one kid and ended up with twins) Ideas include; the fairy/witch of waves, the fairy/witch of emotions, or the fairy witch of performance. I like performance and emotions the best, based on that one line form the movie about music hearing the songs in people's hearts and how music often comes with preforming...these kids would be a nightmare to deal with, not for Rivusa who raised them, but like everyone else

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

🌊Aisha: I think Aisha definitely wants a family but doesn't exactly know what she wants. I think she'd settle on one kid however, she was one of two and that really didn't do her any good growing up repressed and lonely. Growing up lonely and depressed was more of a consequence of her parents, so she wants to put all her enegry into one kid

⚕️Nabu: much like Aisha he doesn't have a strong opinion. He tends to think a small number like 2ish, because he grew up quite lonely but he isn't settled till they start taking about it and they both settle on one

🤽Naisha (???) (Do they have a ship name?): okay my favorite idea is the fairy of refraction, which I think perfectly mixes Aisha and Nabu's fairy powers, but I have more ideas. The fairy/witch of mist, the fairy/witch mirage, or the fairy/witch of pressure (like you go deeper in the ocean more pressure)

🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

#winx club #winx club headcanons #winx musa #winx riven #rivusa #riven x musa #winx bloom #winx sky #skloom #bloom x sky #winx stella #winx brandon #stella x brandon #winx aisha #winx layla #aisha x nabu #winx tecna #winx timmy #tecna x timmy #tecmy #winx flora #winx helia #winx mirta #flora x mirta #flora x helia #Florelia

[dulcewrites]

What are your thoughts on Criston Cole?

Hmmm this is complicated, like how I feel about almost every character in f&b/hotd lmao.

I will say I don’t have super strong feelings about book criston. He personally didn’t stand out to me when I read f&b, but could be bc I watched the show before i read the book. I felt pretty apathetic about almost every book character compared to their show counterparts. The whole Rhaenyra/Daemon/criston storyline did make me uncomfortable while reading the book (mushroom we hate you).

As for show criston, I think the changes they made have him suffer and soar as a character - sort of in the same way Alicent does. Making him dornish full stop instead just from the dornish marshes. Giving him dialogue that expresses his status compared to the people he literally has to protect with his life. All good especially since this is a story about a bunch of privileged (mostly white) people fighting over who gets to oppress everyone else.

That being said, when you make these changes, then prop Rhaenyra up in the way the show narrative tries to, you essentially paint him as a villian (though i think he has every right not to fuck with Rhaenyra). Having a lowborn man of color who denied wanting to be a white princess’ boy toy be painted as the “evil” ex is.. a choice. I think criston as a character is subjected to a lot of hate in the way male characters on the show are not. And as a black woman who has been in her fair share of fandoms, it is hard not to get racist vibes from some of the criticism.

it parallels how people treat Alicent. the vitriolic nature in which Alicent (and in this case criston) gets criticized compared to their counterparts makes me side eye a lot of folks. The criston incel remarks are so weird to me bc 1. Words mean things lol. Criston would be the guy actual incels hate. Extremely good looking, very good at the most ‘masculine’ hobby you can have in that time (being a warrior), and criston himself made illusions to having a romantic life pre joining the kingsguard. Him disliking Rhaenyra doesn’t make him incel, it makes him someone who got jilted

I get why people are nervous about where they will take the relationship between Alicent and criston. I get why people think he would switch on a dime from having her on this untouchable pedestal to being mean to her. But imo I don’t see Alicent crossing the line (and proceeding to double down on it) the way nyra did 🤷🏽‍♀️. I hope the writers keep their relationship as is. And I hope we get more king maker criston in s2 bc we barely saw that in s1

#hope this makes sense #criston is a funny character in the sense I feel strongly about how people completely misread him #but I don’t feel strongly about him alone #asks and requests

[myrpvoid]

The sun bled in real slow. Sunlight filtered by venetian blinds. Thin golden bands. Posters on the wall painted in pale gold light.

ACAB

Hack the Planet

Free Your Mind

A podcast about alien conspiracies droned on. Cover-ups. Men in black. Rockwell chorus about being watched. Dance-able paranoia, baby.

Obsession with secrets and the madness that can bring. The mundane eerie. No eldritch necessary. Knowing things for which there was never any unknowing.

He was awake. A lonely boy. Always called himself a boy. Always a boy. Fleeting thoughts about which Spice Girl he actually had the biggest crush on back in the day. Dial-up dreams. Late 90s.

Get up. Temptation to spark up a joint. Today he would do the world sober. There was an old clip of Tom Waits he thought of some times. Some kinda interview. He said that reality was for people who couldn't face drugs. Fuck. What did it mean to face drugs? What did it mean to face reality? Did he have whatever the hell it was to face either?

Coffee. Black as a g-man's suit. Check on the psilocybin mushrooms growing in his closet. Shower. Shower thoughts. Not a cold shower. He wasn't on that take a cold shower and be a superman psycho shit. Get dressed. Black hoodie. Black jeans. Lock up the apartment. Walk to work. The shop. His shop.

The neighborhood's scents. Cigarettes. Cheap wine. Sweat. Urine. Yeah. The normies bitched all the time about how you couldn't go downtown anymore. It seemed everything had gotten just a bit meaner and more savage. People got devoured by the cracks. The cracks kept getting bigger. Most normies wanted blood or so it seemed. All that broke his heart. He wasn't sure he could face all that either on drugs or off.

Shit. That was it. Any given day. Can you really fucking do this today? That's what drugs and gods and all that were made of at the end of the day, right? Maybe.

Walking along. Hands in pockets. He kept seeing something. Posters on utility poles. Same ones over and over. Not indie bands or absurdist humor.

Crosses.

Back to tradition.

. . . Real bad vibes. The worst kind.

Some group called the Aryan Vanguard had been pasting their propaganda in the 'hood. The fash. He hated the fash.

A quick look around. Fished out a pocket knife. Cut down one of the posters. Razor blades behind it. Bad vibes. Not good for a morning. He needed to chill but the fash made it hard. . .

He was the owner/operator of a small computer repair shop. The Tek Spot. Honest work for the IRS. He did okay for himself. He unlocked the door. Turned around the closed sign so it read open. He turned on the lights.

Open for business.

Another day. Face it.

#rp writing #twitter rp #dabasedpaul #yeah

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

BTS!! Don't Hurt Yourself

BTS: Write a dvd commentary about a passage from the fic (I cannot pic a fav so I'm just gonna give any old passage, I chose this one because I have a fun backstory about when I wrote it)(Full disclosure I own dvds but its been so long since I watched dvd commentary that I don't really remember what it's like so I'll just talk about the passage and how I made the decisions I did and how it came about, you know, the making of the passage.)

Spicy. alright I can do spicy.

Stede had always thought that a desire to hurt another individual out of malice or hatred was something that was intended to be done without their consent, that it would be dampened by the thought that the other person was into it. He was somewhat surprised to find that Izzy’s openly asking for it did not cheapen his own sadistic pleasure in giving the bastard what he deserved.

And he did deserve it, Stede decided as he pressed the head of his cock into Izzy’s tight, wet cunt. Izzy deserved to get smacked around and spat upon. Not just for the stunt with the blow job and the secret phone call, but also for calling Edward a whore, and a twat, and every other unkind derogatory thing he’d said in that courtroom and out, and for being generally an unpleasant, nasty little man that no one wanted to be around, and for causing Ed so much grief.

First of all, Bonnet, you are also causing Ed grief by fucking his husband but I digress

anyway. Backstory: This is from Chapter 7 of Don't Hurt Yourself. A chapter which I slaved away on for I think about two months, because I had written up to the point where Stede and Izzy Yaoi prat fall onto each other and Stede ends up with Izzy's tit in his hand or whatever, and I had no idea where to go from there ie how to get Stede's cock in Izzy's cunt in a way that was at least realistic enough for me to be satisfied with it.(emotional realities not physical realities, as is my right as an ofmd fic author, David Jenkins school of writing ect.) It's a problem I have with writing both Jack/Stede and Izzy/Stede, I have to seamlessly bring them from bitching at each other like they do in the show to fucking each other. Its not as easy as it sounds.

The breakthrough of the writers block came for me the same night I did magic mushrooms for the first time. My dealer told me that they would take about 3 hours to kick in (they took half that amount of time) and I was like, well I have three hours to spare so I might as well try to bang out a couple paragraphs. (it was the day I posted "why is it so much easier to write when the edible is about to kick in" It was not an edible I was waiting on. Idk why I said edible I regularly admit to drugs on here lmao.) So I managed to write a lot of the dialogue and then these two paragraphs. But the shrooms kicked in as I was finishing up the last paragraph, which meant that I ended it with some absolutely inebriated drivel about the word fuck and how it's used to convey both hate (e,g. shut the fuck up, fuck you) and sex that I had to delete when I was sober and I very rapidly lost the ability to write after that.

Anyway now that the fun back story is out of the way let's actually talk about what's happening in these two paragraphs. Stizzy hate sex! Stede and Izzy are sometimes hard to make fuck because Stede simply does not think about him, but they're also incredibly fun to make fuck. Muppet vibes off the charts especially when they're doing bdsm (which is the only kind of sex Izzy knows how to have). Miss Piggy slapping Kermit energy but they're not married.

I also tend to think Stede has a dark side. He's as mean as he is nice and he's real fucking nice. I love it when he's evil, because I'm horny about evil men. I think if Stede would think about Izzy long enough he could get dark with it (a vibe which is not incompatible with muppetry broaden your horizons for the possible.) and I think the only way to make him think about Izzy long enough is to have Izzy wrong Ed and make it clear to Stede that Ed was wronged and put Izzy in Stede's direct line of sight.

Basically, I want Stede to have hate sex and I want him to realize he's a sadist. I tried to convey that here. I think that Stede as a character has the capacity for so much love and so much hate. It's an important balance to strike when writing him, if you go too far in one direction you turn him into an unrecognizable monster (which I've seen certain people do) but if you go too far in the other he becomes an unrecognizable woobie baby which is so fucking boring dude. I hope I got across his sadist awakening well. he still needs a second one where you learn you can do it to people you like tho...

The ask meme

#divorce court au #stizzy #drug posting

[fireemblems24]

Golden Wildfire - Ch 5

Spoilers for GW under the cut.

STORY/MAP

Judith!!! Why aren't you playable 😭. Imagine if she and Rodrigue hooked up. Double the sexy.

Claude said "three houses." I'm easily entertained.

Holst is always eating mushrooms and getting sick before meetings.

Shez just fighting this war to get at Jeralt and Byleth, lamo.

At least it's nice Edelgard won a battle not against the church. She actually chased the Alliance back. Though, it's only because of heel-face-turns.

Raphael's eyes are too light-colored. He looks creepy. And, man, Claude is really hard-carrying the Golden Deer for looks for men.

Arval is shitting on Claude for constant retreating lamo.

Still have no idea why he didn't ask Dimitri for help. He's like, oh, shit, the Empire's huge ass army is kicking our ass. They're also fighting the Kingdom. Oh, no, what do we do? Talk to Dimitri? Of course not. Why would we do that?

LINHARDT AND HILDA HAVE SUPPORTS. FUCK YES. It's the lazy duo. OMG, yes. I wanted this soooooo bad. It better be comedic genius.

MAP

Don't worry, Lorenz. Your dad isn't really betraying everyone.

The only place Gatekeeper really makes sense is the Kingdom right now. Why wouldn't he continue guarding the church?

There's a lot of Judith simping going on, and I'm here for it.

Lysithea over here openly hating the Empire. Can't blame her. I feel like all that "honorary Black Eagle" nonsense forget she HATES the Empire.

Why is Claude blaming himself for the Empire's aggression? Did I see this conversation in SB? I don't remember.

Once again, someone is unable to make reforms because Edelgard started a war lol. Both Claude and Dimitri had plans for reform and positive change, but they got halted because of Edelgard.

Is it just me or is Lorenz like really good? He and Dimitri are by far my favorite to play as so far.

SHEZ & LEONIE C SUPPORT

Ready for some mercenary bonding, I'd expect.

Uh oh. I forgot that they may disagree over Jeralt. Surprised she didn't react to Leonie name-dropping Jeralt though.

This is a pretty interesting support for lore potential.

MARIANNE & HILDA C SUPPORT

Judith! I love it when other characters show up in supports.

Is Hilda going to make Marianne do all the work? Oh, thank God. She's not, lol.

Hahah, Marianne sucked at organizing. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Judith does not approve. This is funny so far.

Aww, Hilda is taking the fall. That was sweet.

SHEZ & HILDA C SUPPORT

Lamo at Shez charging head-first into every battle. Very shonen of them.

They have two very different fighting styles lol.

Aww, Hilda is looking out for Shez.

SHEZ & LYSITHEA C SUPPORT

Lysithea is like, I expected you to be more reckless! Meanwhile, that support with Hilda she's too reckless.

I really don't get the vibe that Claude trusts Shez despite what Lysithea said, since he's not telling Shez anything.

Oh, no, Shez called Lysithea the "k" word. She's really prickly.

Love Shez calling Lysithea out for being a hypocrite and saying she's acting like a kid lamo.

That support is everything I hate about Lysithea.

LORENZ & LEONIE C SUPPORT

Bummed they only go to B. They might be my favorite pairings for each other.

Aww, man, that SUCKS for Leonie. I didn't think about that. She had to raise so much money to attend, only for it to last like a month. That hurts. It seems the church gave some back at least.

This is really similar to Shez and Lorenz's support, but I think Lorenz seems like he's coming from a much better place this time. In that one he was so fixated on class. Here he seems more worried he failed to help a commoner out.

LORENZ & MARIANNE C SUPPORT

Marianne got forced into this war 😭 Now I feel so bad for using her. But she's my favorite Golden Deer.

Lorenz offered to speak on her behalf. That's sweet.

I like him encouraging her, but it's still an example of why Dimitri/Marianne is so good. There's no "oh, just cheer up!" that rings so hallow. Raphael/Marianne is pretty good too, because he actually just cheers her up.

HILDA & LEONIE C SUPPORT

"Oh, Hilda, perfect!" - Leonie. "I am, aren't I?" - Hilda 🤣 It's even funnier because Leonie's not even fazed by it.

Leonie asked the wrong person to train lol. Hilda never wants to.

These two are so mismatched. 🤣🤣

Hilda just called Leonie cute lamo.

Did Hilda just invite "cute" Leonie to come to her tent for a bath?

IGNATZ & RAPHAEL C SUPPORT

Wow, they haven't spoken during the whole timeskip?

And Ignatz not bringing up his art at all is super sad.

So Ignatz doesn't want to be a knight and is one, and Raphael wants to be a knight but can't be one. All because of the war.

CLAUDE & RAPHAEL C SUPPORT

I learned absolutely nothing about either character in this support.

At least it brought up how the war is ruining common people's lives because Raphael's family can't travel because it's too dangerous.

I love how Claude's like "those silly eagles and lions always fighting each other" when Dimitri literally just wants to be left alone.

HILDA & LINHARDT C SUPPORT

This is the moment I've been waiting for.

He's like, lamo, you're working. Why?

"And to be clear. I'm not here to help." Linhardt is golden. "Oh, Linhardt, you're on break? Perfect! Then you can help me with this awful whatever that I'm doing!" He continues to be the most quotable.

"Your life seems to be one permanent break." 🤣🤣

Linhardt's even worse than Hilda. As it should be.

MARIANNE & LYSITHEA C SUPPORT

I fully anticipate this to be as awkward and pointless as Claude's and Raphael's support. But it's more Marianne content so . . .

Ohhhh wait, maybe I'm wrong if this is about crest drama.

Fuck that crest scholar. Leave Marianne alone.

Lysithea coming to Marianne's rescue about an annoying crest person is not what I expected, but I'm not upset about it.

Lysithea's really mature here. I like this.

This is the support they deserved in Houses.

NGL, this was actually really cool. REALLY wish it went higher than C.

LEONIE & LINHARDT C SUPPORT

Linhardt is such a mood.

It's refreshing to see Leonie not pressure Linhardt into changing, she just accepts him as his lazy self.

Linhardt's never been hunting, hunh. It's sweet he thought Leonie could use an owl mask for hunting.

And she got him a useless statue. At least he's trying now.

This is kinda cute, ngl. They made each other laugh.

MAIN BATTLE

OK, I was so convinced I accidentally clicked on my SB playthrough that I reset the game, but nope, this really opens with a conversation about why Bernie, a Black Eagle, is fighting . . .

Is this setting up for her recruitment or????

Ok, finally back to Claude and co. Just generic stuff about preparing for Edelgard's invasion though.

Love Judith calling Claude "little Claude." That's what SB is missing, an adult figure like Rodrigue or Judith.

All that talk with Bernie, and only Balthus is recruitable this chapter. Oh, well, I was planning on using him anyways.

Oh, finally! Holst. I was wondering when he's be playable. I should've guessed given I only had 3 units under my control and 4 non-controlled allies running around.

Man, Lorenz is just busted, isn't he?

Claude really doesn't tell his allies anything, does he? I appreciate Lorenz for calling him out on it.

Oh, and Shez can call him out too!

His plan is that Glouster never actually betrayed him, right? That he's a plant to backstab the Empire like in SB?

Balthus and Holst now playable, woot!

Also, it took me like half the battle to figure out that Holst was a sword unit. Like, IDK, he looks like a warrior. I only noticed it when I saw that Ferdinand would blow him away, lamo.

Cool to see Ferdinand leading this stuff though. Seeing him actually get to do something.

Yep, Glouster never wanted anything to do with Edelgard, lamo. Though, why isn't she here?

They really should've told Lorenz this plan. I mean, he's Glouster's kid. I mean, Lysithea knew, so why not Lorenz? Poor Lorenz.

Is it bad I'm more curious about why Glouster didn't tell Lorenz about the plan ahead of time than anything else going on in GW so far? IDK, I just really like more personal drama I guess. Rather than Edelgard tries to kill everyone round, what is it now like 7 routes??

It's better in AG and SB because they're more tied to/involved in the drama. Poor Claude and the Deer seem destined to feel like a third-wheel again so far.

My big hope is that Edelgard realizes she can't take both the Kingdom and the Alliance at the same time, so she decides to focus on the Kingdom only since that's where Rhea is (and, let's face it the country she'll have a WAYYYY harder time bringing to heel under her dominance than the Alliance). So that'll free Claude and co up to do something more interesting than exactly the same thing he did in AM/VW/SS/CF/AG/SB so far. Yikes. I mean, Shahaid or however you spell his name is still there, right? Let Almyra be relevant.

SSS

#golden wildfire #fire emblem #fire emblem three hopes #three hopes #three hopes spoilers #golden wildfire spoilers

[jinkicake]

FHDHFH NO BC REALLY SCARAMOUCHE GOT ME AND I HATE IT!!! Bc all the fanart is top tier like it belongs in a museum and he the same vibe as imposter albedo like they can destroy a nation as a treat bc they’re lashing out🥺 chronic dabi disease. Like someone made this Tiktok about scaramouche walking in like “ daddy’s home” AMD IVE BEEN CRYING BC ITS TRUE HE STOLE ALL MY ATTENTION like wow I LOVE a mean ass man he can be all yandere in public but I’m taller than him like I’ll throw you over my shoulder and take you home💀like good luck choking me I’m into that,but unfortunately the dick is the punishment bc he will get and more unhinged the more you push him, like yeah you can ignore him yelling at you when he’s pissed but in retaliation he will fuck you in the harbinger meeting table like 6 mins before they’re supposed to start he has absolutely no shame bc who’s gon beat his ass?? Lmao can’t decide weather he gags you and they continue on w the meeting like normal like your NOT bouncing on his dick about to pass out or he makes them watch as he humiliates you “don’t try to hide your face now, should I let them use you too? You’re already making a mess” like yeah you can roast him unites red in the face but is it worth him electrocuting you when you cum?? And doing it over and over?? Him🫱🏽‍🫲🏾Lisa Using their electro powers to shock their partners when they cum to make them loose it😔😔 like I would be scared FR if I even made him roll his eyes bc I will be blacked out for four business days he system updates your brain so you just gotta chill for a while like the dick is phenomenal but at what cost😫 and speaking of he definitely has customizable ones like he definitely has one that lights up in that big ass robot like I saw art of the “ fight” of him fucking the traveler In that robot and the wires holding them in place, and now that he’s got his redemption arc started I want him to travel around!! Ion even like going into sumuru w them annoying ass mushrooms 😭 I want to see him go to Liyue and hear about childe reputation “ you know that harbinger that almost drowned the harbor? I hear he’s sneaking around w that hot funeral consultant” “ excuse me what did you say🙂” I need him to restart his hoe era bc I KNOW that he was trying as much shit as he could as a freshly free “human” like idk how he knows kazuha but wouldn’t be surprised if they fucked like he’s a traveler and he’s seen shit, like kazuha could probably tell you about some crazy ass threesome he had in sumuru while on sex pollen😭 like they are for the streets!! Scaramouche would just have to give up bc I like him like oh you hate me? Hate me harder that’s hot🥰🥰 like very jealous of the fatui grunts bc he degrades them 😒 like okay your right maybe a “god” does beet to put a lowly human in their place🥴

EXACTLYYYYY like why is scara's fanart so good it sets me up to fail.... he's a fucking short puppet i should NOT like his ass T T but then again,,, he's fucking crazy and i love psycho characters..... he's unhinged and i enjoy it!!!

((the mention of dabi.... my heart hurts,,, my number one psycho like hes forever in my heart!!))

naur literally scara is so scary because he doesnt care like the dude has nothing to lose so he's so reckless T T it's not like you can ever leave him or anything so he can do whatever he wants w you!!! hence his obsession w fucking you in front of others and just treating you like shit sighhh

honestly, im torn between obsessive yandere!scara and timid gentle!scara like there is no in between... he's either k!lling everyone that you talk to or holding your hand to make sure that you never leave him.... i guess clingy scara is another form or yandere!scara huh-

wahhhhh no literally ughhhh he and lisa are bitches when it comes to teasing their s/o w electricity like their fingers are literal vibrators.... ADD MISS MIKO TO THAT LIST TOO BC SHE'D ALSO DO THAT- they're all evil!!!!

oh my gawdddd did you read that one post about fucking his robot? my jaw DROPPED when i saw it.... it's like fucking eren's titan

i've seen the scara kazuha ship connections already!!!! and honestly,,, i see it.... i truly do!

also, i have to ask.... how do you feel about his supposed redemption arc? bc me, personally, i don't know how i feel like i want closure for him and everything but i also like him as a little shit >:-) i dont want him to get softttttt but idk!!!

#sarahandoikawatalkshit #xiaos spicy almond tofu #sorta?

[sin-sidejob]

Well since I have the astute honor of doing one of these thanks to you, I think it’s only fair I do one in return, and Yknow I have two ideas. I am in fact a sucker for Andre (very obviously) but I’m indefinitely curious how their relationship would work- even if it means revoking Delaney’s surrogate mom card and makes my father and me lonely all in one swoop.

Andre and Delaney sounds like it could be very pure, smutty and also a crackship- enlighten me if you would. And have fun or I’ll sob at you💕💕💕💕

This man would have to literally sweep her off her feet and fucking go all out trying to gain her affections because she’s def a bit of a prude lmao

I could see it somewhat but they’re really different, Delaney’s only drugs are needed prescriptions and she’s def the type to actually be allergic to weed. She’s a buzzkill lmao, but I think they’d def vibe with Andre somewhat but I’m unsure if they’d fully click?

More below ↓↓↓

Okay, so, Andres a sex loving party animal with a large tolerance for almost every drug under the sun + some??? Delaneys more straight laced, def the type to unwind with friends and maybe get drunk and party but I think she’s got an aversion to drugs, both hard and soft, due to how hard it was for her to get diagnosed with her various shit and how people use the medicine she takes every day to function as party drugs. Just freaks her out ig??

But self-medication with drugs she understands and vibes with, like if it’s done safely, so I can see her clicking with Andre somewhat on the whole neurodivergent anxious bitches in a corporate job check. Romantically? They’d click I’d say, somewhat at least, because the sex would be fire and fun and safe. Before anything though she’d ask him to get tested for safety’s sake, which is literally the most logical thing because fucking mushroom herpes??? SIRRR???

They’re absolutely more of a crackship because it’s like this straight laced attorney, who’s maybe not even fully human??? And this head of biochem who’s literally labeled as alwayssexual and has more drugs than an actual drug den? But the dynamic would be funny as fuck I’d think because it’s like, literally an average woman who probably has an intolerance or aversion to everything he takes except the prescription meds.

OKAY IF THEY DID GET TOGETHER, I CAN SEE THEM AT A PARTY, and just meeting and she asks quietly if he’s got any adderall or diazepam and he’s like “ooooh party time?” And offers some but she’s like “fuck no, lol, forgot to take my meds this morning.” And they just vibe from there on out. I can see them more as a solidarity friendship in full honesty due to their differences but hella chill, especially when Andre’s having one of those bad days like at the wedding and he’s off his meds/drugs and having panic attacks.

She just swoops in with every damn calming method she’s got in the book, breathing techniques, picking out the surroundings and counting out different things around them, stim toys, the fucking works

But in summary, it’s more crack fic or unlikely but funny asf best friends with Andre and Delaney

(And also the ingrained loyalty with not taking her kids man 🤷🏻‍♀️)

#my thots #ask me #ask game #Andre Lee #inside job oc: delaney #inside jobsona #inside job #self insert: delaney #sona: delaney #finn tag #inside job oc