#this is what i hate about posting quotes on tumblr because they lose so much of their power outside of the source material
Quote
I always live in a dream world.
Jackie Kennedy in conversation with Richard Nixon, 1971
#jackie kennedy#history#this is absolutely devastating in context because they're discussing nostalgia and she's referring to her life without jack#this is what i hate about posting quotes on tumblr because they lose so much of their power outside of the source material#:/ oh well#'it doesn't matter now. let the coquette blogs come.' /beauty and the beast
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house md 2024 headcanons 🫡
hi loves!! jumping on this trend :^) i don't think any of these make sense but they made me laugh soooo here u go
House has a very bad pain day and (when pushed) says that he strained the muscle while riding his bike. Obviously nobody believes him, so the ducklings + Wilson spend the day trying to figure out what he did and end up finding security footage of him attempting to hit the griddy in the morgue
Kutner has a very generic inspirational quotes tumblr blog (he’s so proud of it) and House finds it and just starts dropping quotes from it in DDXs to mess with him & then acting all innocent
Thirteen has a secret thirst trap tiktok acc that doesn’t explicitly show her face but has her lab coat & maybe stethoscope. When Chase suggests that it’s her she doesn’t confirm or deny it and just keeps winking. Cameron definitely follows the account after this. Thirteen pretends not to realise.
Wilson takes a uquiz to find out what sort of cheese he is and is devastated when it says he’s cheddar. He then has an identity crisis because he thinks he’s too bland and tries to reinvent his aesthetic, leading to one infected eyebrow piercing and a tramp stamp that’s never mentioned again. Potential there for a sappy scene where House tells him he's anything but bland.
Cuddy starts a momblog style podcast. House sends anonymous hate. Taub guest stars.
I think Taub would get deeply into ASMR. Like it’d start with him finding and playing a video of ASMR triggers for his daughters, then he tries it himself to see if that calms them down even more, etc etc. He starts a youtube channel and it blows up. He gets recognised by patients at the hospital. It goes to his head just a little. He unironically uses the term 'ASMRtist'
A cosplayer has a mysterious illness and the team has to go to a convention to test for environmental factors. Chase is apprehensive but House forces him to go. He’s quickly recognised at the convention and it turns out that he has a cosplay instagram account and they get stopped every 10 mins to take pictures. No one lets him live it down
Thirteen and Cameron kiss & fall in love & babysit Taub's kids. House makes relentless jokes but is quietly very fond of them and their relationship. Pls i need this
Foreman has a twitter/X account where he posts a combination of work out tips/inspirational quotes (not as sweet as Kutner's blog, more grindset vibes yknow) but he gets mixed up in a pyramid scheme for protein powders and gets cancelled. Also potential for a sappy scene here where Foreman says he admires Kutner for not letting House's teasing about his blog get to him. They're besties now and make each other better.
Cuddy forces all of them to go on a wellness retreat. House and Wilson make a bet to see who can go the longest without speaking. It's not even a silent retreat, they're just like that. Also someone convinces Chase that the utility shed on the retreat is haunted.
The wellness retreat no speaking bet also def has potential for gay chicken. Like Wilson kisses House to see if that will get him to lose the bet. By the next morning neither of them know or care who lost the bet, they leave their room looking Extremely disheveled and return to the hospital very much together. Cuddy is not at all surprised. She planned this. Each of the ducklings hand her $100.
PPTH minecraft server. yeah
#im so tired#i have an assessment due in 6 days#time to speed read all of inferno#house md#gregory house#headcanon#hatecrimes md#house md headcanons#hilson#mouse bites#james wilson
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tbf i still find non radfem books like who cooked the last supper, invisible women, the feminine mystique, the second sex etc good recs for girls/women interested in radical feminism. sort of like an intro class to feminism in general before you focus on actual radfem literature. you can't go from 0 feminist readings to gyn/ecology overnight... it's not a given that gyns who find themselves on radblr will have read basic feminist texts
yeah that’s a really good point! I think a lot of the problems on radblr come from the fact that most women come to it without any knowledge about feminism, much less any organizing experience. that’s fine, and to some extent should be expected given the current states of the broader left (weak, disorganized, overrun with liberalism/ anarchism) and the feminist movement (functionally non-existent). That’s just the way it is across the left — I can’t tell you how many so-called socialists I know who couldn’t even tell you what class struggle means. In our case, though, I think it’s especially problematic, because a lot of women are “radicalized” by disillusionment with trans politics (or discomfort with trans people 🙃) — and without a proper grounding in feminist basics, it’s really, really easy to at best lose focus on women’s liberation, and at worst just become a reactionary. lol.
So, I totally agree that some feminism 101 is in order, so we’re all at least speaking the same language when it comes to the messier ideological debates about and within radical feminism.
I think a big part of the problem, though, is that … it’s not a given that women who find themselves on radblr will EVER read basic feminist texts, or even radical feminist ones. it’s pretty obvious from the way people talk about lesbian separatism and political lesbianism that, like, no one knows what they’re fucking talking about. and how could they, if they’re just reblogging quote posts and the same handful of master lists with a whole bunch of random pdfs with no context or commentary? hate to break it to ya, ladies, but all your faves were political lesbians. like, literally all of them. And this is actually pretty clear from the things they write!
I’ll save my takes on radblr’s fundamentally incoherent lesbian politics and the fact that separatism has NEVER been a settled question in radical feminism and the fact that political movements need GOALS and STRATEGIES and DUES BASED MEMBERSHIP ORGANIZATIONS for later. Suffice it to say, we need to stop being so content to let tumblr thought leaders pulling evocative quotes from PDFs decide what we think, and start getting serious about political education.
I don’t think every woman on radblr needs to do a PhD to be able to weigh in on things, but I do think those of us with the time/desire to make intellectual interventions, create syllabi, and/or start cohering some democratic organizational infrastructure (or at least some more discussion groups) can and should step up. Obv people are and have been doing this, but if we want to ever do anything more than snipe at each other online, we gotta get movin.
Thanks for letting me grandstand on ur ask, i just have a decade’s worth of frustration built up about this 🙃 always more to say. (like, I also don’t think we should be so into gyn/ecology at all, actually … but more on that later (-:< )
TL;DR: READ MORE! GET WISE, WOMEN! LET A THOUSAND READING GROUPS BLOOM!
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So I was Thinking some Thoughts while in the shower and absolutely losing my mind but decided that I was too busy to sit down and make a post.
Until I checked Tumblr and saw the conversation that @monstersinthecosmos started which is related to the Thoughts I was having and well, here we are now.
I've been going through TVL, TVA, and B&G because of the Marius meta I'm currently working on so of course I was thinking about how he basically just abandoned Armand.
And of course this ties into how Armand didn't technically lie to Louis when he said he was the oldest surviving vampire known to him. He thought that shit was true.
And I was thinking about that scene in TVL when he starts spilling his guts to Lestat and how we all hate the fact that he did that, damn him, how could he when him not telling Amadeo about The Parents put him in jeopardy, etc.
But I would argue that it makes emotional sense that he disclosed to Lestat. Hell, it even makes some logical sense.
And I think it all ties back to this line in B&G:
"I think I have come to enjoy loneliness. I think when I was mortal I loved it. I was the wanderer." (p. 178)
He's speaking to Eudoxia here, toward the end of his time with Mael and Avicus. But let's put a pin in that to briefly discus mortal Marius, since he brings it up in the above quote.
I'm not going to go too deep into this as I already explore the topic thoroughly in the meta I'm working on but mortal Marius was a fucking weirdo. Full stop. He was bookish and pretentious and only really seemed to be interested in writing his histories. He speaks himself about what he's recorded, the things he's seen and it's implied that he was there to do just that--record, not participate.
We can extrapolate a few facts about mortal Marius from this:
He was obsessed with documenting the political and social goings-on of his time because perhaps
He didn't fully understand or relate to the more social aspects of his age (which is why he leaned so heavily on the political shit, where the rules were blatantly laid out unlike in interpersonal relationships) but
He perhaps actually craved the company of other people but not knowing how to achieve that like a normal person, he used documentation as his excuse to be close to any social gathering.
When you stop to think about it, it seems less like Marius actually enjoys being alone and more like he just doesn't know how to relate to people. Which obviously gets worse with vampirism, as The Blood just seems to take innate traits in people and crank them up to 11.
When comparing what little we know of mortal Marius to what we know of him in the rest of the books, a pattern starts to emerge: periods of attempting to reach out and relate punctuated by longer bouts of self imposed isolation.
It's my belief that Marius isolates himself as an unhealthy coping mechanism (relatable king). This of course was also worsened by how he was brought into The Blood, where he had to go into hiding and keep people at arm's length because of the Parents. It becomes the perfect excuse to keep this same unhealthy cycle going.
Roughly 15 years into being a vampire, his hand is forced into making Pandora and they went on to fight for 200(??) years. Mostly about Akasha. Which would have taught him (at least subconsciously) not to share The Parents with any potential future fledglings. It just causes too much drama.
Not to mention the fact that even if the burnt ones survived the attack on the parents for those 220+ years, they now how to contend with the new vampire cultists that started to crop up.
So there was a lot of practical reasons to try to keep the Parents secret. Even though he was apparently terrible at cloaking his thoughts about them. That one is on him. Bad job, Marius.
By the time Lestat gets to him, I think it's purely because he's in the middle of the "tired of being lonely" phase of his cycle. That's why he finally goes to Lestat and allows him to Know Things.
Well, scratch that. I think that's why he agreed to go to Lestat and talk to him. I think there's a good chance he was never planning on disclosing the secret to Lestat until the moment he did it.
As he said to Thorn on p. 48 of B&G:
"I brought him to me; I talked with him as I'm talking to you now. But something curious happened with him which caught me quite off guard. I felt a sudden surge of pure devotion to him and this combined with an extraordinary trust.
"He was young but he wasn't innocent. And when I talked, he listened perfectly. When I played the teacher, there came no argument. I wanted to tell him my earliest secrets. I wanted to reveal the secret of our King and Queen.
"It had been a long, long time since I'd revealed that secret. I'd been alone for a century among mortals. And Lestat, so absolute in his devotion to me, seemed completely worthy of my trust."
So he's tired of being lonely. He's approached by a new vampire who is too foolhardy to mask his awe at being near Marius (who has an ego, let us not forget), who defers to him without question, and who reminds Marius of himself:
"You have come into being at the end of an era, at a time when the world faces changes undreamed of. And it was the same with me. I was born and grew to manhood in a time when the ancient world, as we call it now, was coming to a close. Old faiths were worn out. A new god was about to rise." (TVL, p. 381-382)
And:
"Precisely," he said. "So you and I have that in common. We did not grow to manhood expecting very much of others. And the burden of conscience was private, terrible though it might be." (TVL, p. 382-382)
The time seemed right to disclose. I think it was Marius's perspective that Lestat should be his protege because he was sick of being lonely and he finally (thought) he found someone who was perfect to take under his wing. Until the whole violin debacle happened, of course.
So why did Marius not reach out to Armand, knowing that he was still alive?
This ties into the conversation from the other day (yesterday? I don't remember) that @monstersinthecosmos also started about passing on trauma through the Blood.
Armand says to Lestat in TVL (p. 249):
They never satisfy you, the ones you make. In silence the estrangement and the resentment only grow.
An interesting sentiment being expressed by someone who has never been Maker and only been fledgling.
In B&G (p. 363), Marius says of making Armand:
And as he drank from me, I gave him my lessons, my secrets. I told him of the gifts that might one night come to him. I told him of my long ago love for Pandora. I told him of Zenobia, of Avicus, of Mael. I told him all but that final secret. That I kept from him.
Marius spent perhaps hours pouring all his love and pain into this boy until he eventually came away with an impression: that fledglings grow to resent their Makers. The way Marius resents Teskhamen. The way Pandora resents Marius. He knows this beginning his life as a vampire and even when it becomes obvious that Marius is not dead, he believes this is the way it goes. As does Marius. Marius also believes this because it's also his only experience with Maker/fledgling relationships.
This is also why he refers to making Armand being his worst mistake. He truly believes that Armand should hate him for stealing so much of his youth from him. Should hate him for raising him for the Blood. Should hate him for not allowing him to die. Should hate him for being that selfish. He believes Armand should hate him for all of that because perhaps Marius hates himself for having done all that.
Which I think Armand understands to some extent. It's perhaps why he accepted Marius with open arms at Maharet's compound:
Through his tears he saw no recrimination for the grand experiment that had gone wrong. He saw the face that he had painted, now darkened slightly with the thing we naively call wisdom; and he saw the same love he had counted upon so totally in those lost nights. (QotD, p. 274)
It's because Armand, having just turned Daniel, better understand the ways in which Makers can fail themselves and their fledglings when love gets involved.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. I gotta go cry now.
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I got to read La Signorina Nessuno by Giorgia Soleri and I want to share my opinion.
Three premises:
1) I really appreciate Giorgia for her activism and respect her as a person, but I honestly did not like the book so this won't be nice. I’ll put everything under the cut because I understand that someone may want to stay away from negativity.
2) As above. I appreciate and respect Giorgia as a person, don’t be a jerk and try to use this post to hate on her.
3) So why am I writing all this? First, because I didn't start this blog to censor myself. Second, because I'm honestly tired of seeing the number of followers mistaken for quality. There are so many things an influencer can do, and do well. This doesn’t mean that just because they are famous they have to do everything.
OK let's go.
From what I had the opportunity to read through Giorgia's stories I already noticed the level of her poetry was not very high, yet I still was disappointed. This book is not poetry, I’m sorry but it is cringe from start to finish, with moments that trigger an involuntary hilarity.
-Let's start from the basics, the lexicon. To say it’s elementary is to be generous. An extremely basic and repetitive language makes me think that the author simply does not read, which is a serious problem for those who want to write.
- The infamous enjeambment. Reading other people’s reviews I saw that we all noticed the same problem. Writing poetry doesn’t mean breaking the verse at random and btw it doesn’t mean use punctuation just as casually as well.
-Metaphors and mythology. Giorgia said she is ashamed of having left school and I very much respect her feelings and the courage she has to admit it, however, perhaps she would do better to leave the mythology alone since she clearly knows it on a very shallow level. Using it badly does not raise the level of her writing, it dulls it even more.
-The erotic part. It’s involuntary funny as much as it’s worrying. Why? Because it looks like she depends on Damiano in a way thad doesn't seem very healthy. Once again the metaphors are, well, not the best. There’s something about a "drill" that will stay with me for a long time ^^’ Just as, and I quote, the mucous membranes thick as Christ’s tears. I mean...
-The themes are supposed to be deep but what comes out of this book is a series of aphorisms drawn from a teenager's diary. Or from Tumblr. Some are also good as captions for overdramatic photoshopped landscapes to post on Instagram.
-Finally, here is what’s the main problem in my opinion. Publishing house and marketing. A self respecting publishing house a) would’ve given the book a very good editing and b) wouldn’t have advertised this book as it did, passing it off as the new literary miracle of the year. Really, it has created immense expectations for a product that, I’m sorry, is of very low quality.
Obviously they wanted to take advantage of Giorgia's fame, who, in turn, seems happy to ignore all the negative reviews the book is getting, keeping on sharing the positive ones. I would probably do the same, however once again this creates expectations in the audience, which multiplies the disappointment by 100.
If this book had been advertised as a product for teens, the reviews would have been far more lenient. But no, they even had to brign up Alda Merini of all people! Well, maybe I wrote all this exactly because this comparison made me lose my temper.
For those who don’t know, Alda Merini is the greatest Italian poet of the 20th century. Some time ago Giorgia herself said that somebody told her she is the new Alda Merini. Now... If this isn’t the hugest facepalm moment ever. Honestly, I’d have kept this for myself. It tastes of arrogance, but also of total lack of knowledge of Merini's work.
It’s really a comparison that humiliates the intelligence of the readers. In this, I must say, Giorgia (not her book) disappointed me. However I believe that although poetry is clearly not for her, with prose (and a real editor) she could get much better results.
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Honestly, I hope reddit fucking dies. Just crashes and burns, never to rise from the ashes again. People like to claim it's a source of knowledge and there's all kinds of good advice in there. While that may be true, it's like panning for gold in sewage river. Sure, you might find something good in there but you're up to your knees in fesces.
I lost count of how many times I'd be searching for an answer to an issue. I find someone asking about my *exact* problem through google, only it's a reddit thread. When I open the thread, there's one response. "Did you try googling it?" And I got there. Through google.
Reddit has spread so much awful misinformation. It steals and reposts things more than pinterest. Despite newer policies, it's bred some of the most hateful communities possible. Even when you go into one of the "nice" boards, the environment is toxic and hostile as hell. I've had more pleasant experiences delving into youtube comments.
But that's not why Reddit needs to fail. It needs to fail for it's astronomical greed. It's not the fact that they're shifting to charge for their API, it's how much they're going to charge.
Most pricing models, like Reddit's, are based on calls. You call an API every time you're on tumblr. Ever time you change pages, click on a blog, or more posts load. Each one of those is a call, and it's easy to rack up up dozens or hundreds of calls just as a single user.
The rates are so low, most give quotes in terms of "per million calls" at around $1-2 per million. One that I personally use (Open Weather Map) would be $1.50 per million if I wanted more than the free tier. That breaks down to $0.0015 per thousand calls. Note the number of zeros there.
Reddit's API pricing is $0.24 per thousand. Or $240 per million calls. I'm pretty sure you can see the difference between $1.50 and $240.
Now multiply that by the millions of users that access it through an API, such as what a third party app would use.
Every single person involved in deciding that price needs to lose their job and every penny in their bank account. Because that's downright criminal.
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How do you decide what fics to comment on?
I laughed a lot seeing this ask cause, am I acquiring a reputation as a commenter? That's not a bad thing by any means! I just can't help but laugh at the fact I've been talked about for leaving long comments more than I have been for my own art and fics. But I guess that just means those comment leave an impression?
Anyway, sorry for the ramble there for a moment, onto the question!
To answer this question I probably first need to ask another question:
How do I chose what fics to read?
Because... I read the fics and then I comment on them... Obviously.
And I read mostly Cassandra, Eugene or Arianna content. I will read anything tangled, but generally for me to stray from the norm it's due to recommendation from mutuals, friends, just random posts talking about how much they love a fic?
And if I read something, I comment!
It's very rare for me nowadays to not comment, I would have to either not have anything good to say (which hasn't happened.... ever? I think... Thanks to Ao3's amazing tagging system I imagine!) or I read it on kindle and forgot.... (I am so sorry...)
BUT! There are rules? Exceptions? I don't know...
Here's the thing, I know the way I comment, the length, the quotes, it isn't everybody's cup of tea and I respect that!
Before, I assumed people would tell me if they didn't like it.
But I no longer assume that.
Now, I will go full in with my first comment, and if the author responds positively (like, a single word can be positive, if they just says 'thanks' that is positive), I add them to my green-list (this only exists in my head). I trust them to have been honest in that response and I assume they enjoy long-form comments!
If there is no response, which is perfectly fine, I will assume there is a chance they HATE those comments, and aren't willing to respond saying that as the response would be public and a lot of people are too shy to give negative feedback... So I will stop commenting in that way.
I won't stop consuming content, leaving kudos or anything like that, I will even continue to leave short comments!
But I will cease the long comments out of, honestly, social anxiety and not wanting to be hated by the fandom I'm in!
I know this might not be the best attitude. But I just have too much anxiety and I end up feeling like I am harassing people if that makes sense?
Oh, also, obviously, if I have a negative interaction with someone on tumblr, or they blocked me, or they spoke badly of me at some point, I will cease consumption of those fics! (I do make an exceptions for co-written fics, but that's more complicated).
But yeah...
If you have a fic you want to recommend umm... DO!
Like, please!
Especially if it's your own cause I feel so much more at peace when commenting on fics from mutuals on here cause I know they aren't going to get angry at me for long comments!
I feel like this got long rambly and probably shows just how much my anxiety has been eating at me these past few umm.... weeks, months? I lose track of time.
I've been putting of answering this ask because I had completely stopped commenting for a while there... I'm kinda getting back into it now! But answering this at a time when I was not commenting felt very wrong... Almost like fake? I don't know...
My brain is kinda semi turned on right now, I'm so exhausted...
But I do welcome recommendations!
Especially one-shots!
I really need to get back into reading and commenting and I think just jumping back in is the way!
This ask did, kinda hit a nerve with me as well, it made me feel for a few moments that perhaps my only contribution to this fandom is my comments? Like, my art flops so bad on tumblr... my fics do really well actually I'm always shocked how many people read them, but... my brain just isn't processing stuff right, it's looking for the negatives right now. It's not a good time for me.
But after some thought I realized this is a nice ask!
I'm glad people like those comments, I'm glad I can contribute to the fandom and specifically to fic writers in that way!
I want to do it more.
I'm just, recovering mentally right now from some stuff, heavy fics are kinda off the table and... Even searching for fics feels like a chore?
See, even writing that I feel lazy for saying it xD which is silly, like, I'm not being lazy I'm just ill...
Rambling aside.
Send recommendations.
I'm sorry I haven't been commenting!
I appreciate every ask even if I'm kinda slow at answering sometimes!
I'm going to bed.
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Radfem/💇♀️: Are you a radfem, just radfem-adjacent, or just gender critical?
radical feminism is the form of feminism to actually aims to improve to material reality of women. choice-y lib-y pomo-y “feminism” is just decorating the cage, radical feminism is getting out of it 🐅
Peak/🌄: What was the first thing that peaked you, and when did you peak (not just specifically “peak trans,” but anything “peak patriarchy”)?
peak trans was the rape rhetoric towards lesbians
Everest/🏔️: What has been your worst subsequent peak?
when nobody who supported the gender movement was pushing back against the rape rhetoric towards lesbians.
one time i did see someone say “don’t say that” not because it was, you know, rape, but because it’s quote: “bad optics”
Separate/🚷: Are you a female separatist or a lesbian separatist, and to what extent?
GNC/🥾: Are you GNC, and to what extent?
no one would describe me as gnc, and i’ve got shiny long hair and pretty privilege (lol) to thank for that. i mostly only leave the house for work (in scrubs) or or the pottery studio (in a tshirt and overalls or sweatpants.) but when i’m wearing something in my style it’s usually pretty feminine, albeit practical. i refuse to wear anything debilitating or uncomfortable. i straight up lose respect for anyone who has those long false nails 🤮
Orientation/🩲: Are you a lesbian, bisexual, or heterosexual?
lesbian 🌈 lucky me ☺️
Bi/🔺: If you’re bisexual, are you a febfem?
Hetero/👫: If you’re heterosexual, are you choosing to be celibate?
Picrew/👤: No more identifying information, make a picrew icon of yourself that doesn’t look like you.
what about some of my photomode snaps from horizon zero dawn and forbidden west?
Leg/🦵: Where does your leg hair start getting darker (above the knee, mid thigh, dark from the moment hip ends and thigh begins)?
at my knees
Body/🔍: Do you have more/darker body hair on your left side, right side, or about equal on both sides?
equal i think?
Carnivora/🦊: Are you more of a cat person or a dog person?
I’m bipetsual.also i think hating dogs or hating cats is embarrassing and demonstrates poor character and you shouldn’t admit that in public…
Baby/👶: How do you feel about the baby plane (funny answers only)?
i’m zooted out on benzos seroquel and complimentary drinks when i’m flying so i am OUT snork mimimimimi on planes…
Natal/🤰: Pronatalism, antinatalism, or natalism neutral?
natalism agnostic i guess? natalism skeptic? i cannot relate to wanting to give birth,but i get that not every woman desires the same thing. and i have no interest in denying women the opportunities and resources to be mothers. however, i believe in the importance of empowering women worldwide with access to education autonomy over their reproductive health. when women are empowered, birth rates go down. this is a good thing. woman choosing when to be mothers , or not, is a good thing. i believe in humanity (despite everything) and would like to see us continue to survive as a species. however unending population growth only serves a few very powerful people because capitalism demands endless growth. it’s not a sustainable future and it’s not the future women want.
-Fem/💻: Do you identify as a member of any of the -fem titles (factfem, nicefem, rudefem, etc)?
not really. however the only posts and comments i have made that seem to get any attention are snarky comments and jokes, so i guess i come off as a rudefem more than anything else. which is not how i conceptualize myself and not exactly the energy i want to put out there to lesbians and gnc people who go along with gender nonsense. or especially to ones that are really struggling, feel pressured, or have existing trauma or mental illness exacerbated by gender propaganda. above all else i just want lesbians and gnc people and kids to be safe and healthy. i just don’t know if there’s much i, using a tumblr blog, can do about that.
Animal/🦕: If you had to pick an animal to represent your blog, what would it be (catfems, you don’t have to answer cat)?
a wolf 🐺 because i want my mate . AwoooOooo
Labrys/🪓: If you’re a lesbian, how do you feel about the labrys (both the flag and the icon)?
uhhhhmm..
Interest/😍: If you weren’t a radblr user, what would your blog be about?
i wouldn’t be me if i weren’t a feminist and weren’t true to myself and my interests. if you can’t be a feminist in a low stakes forum like tumblr, where Can you be a feminist?
Gender/💩: Here’s the link to get a random Wikipedia page. You now have a neogender based off of the page that was pulled up–what is it?
Man on the Moon (soundtrack) oh?
Feminist/🦸♀️: Are there any particular feminists or feminist groups you look up to?
i look up to every lesbian who is being true to herself and not taking male bullshit
Woman/🧑: For $0, name a woman.
Azealia Banks
Man/🧔: If you could kill one man (excluding politicians, billionaires, and those responsible for world tragedies), who would it be?
kAm
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I just want to say regarding one of the hellsite’s most prominent discourses about the phenomenon of the lost art of reblogging, that, as an artist, of course I love the people who reblog my work and I’m grateful to them. But you know what I love more? You know what makes reblogging so special and cherished by so many writers and artists and gifmakers and editors? Reading the tags. People who tag my artwork with their thoughts, emotions, social security number or even a keysmash literally make me reach the height of post-creating satisfaction. People who over analyze every detail make me lose my fucking mind. They are new age intellectuals. People who hate me because I made them feel all the feelings and they just have to tell me. People who tag with their own little archive system and it tells me they want to be able to find my art again or stack it on top of all the other pretty arts that they enjoy on their blog. People who write stuff that’s so incoherent that makes me laugh SO MUCH and I am so obsessed with to this day that I could quote it to you by heart. It’s literally why I post on here at all. So yeah what I’m trying to say is thank you. You make this tumblr the tumblr it was meant to be.
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honestly I never understood very well why all the hate towards sasusaku, they clearly have feelings for each other and were development since the beginning. antis always deny the “The one who filled his lonely existence with the emotion called love was Sakura” and sakura hugging him in the forest, when he left the village and she was the ONLY one who knew he was going.
As for SNS, NS, SK and SH I don’t really care what they ship, I think everyone has the right to like what they like lol. But I think everyone should do this respecting the characters development (SS Stan’s too).
As for NH, I was NH/SS years ago but the fandoms became very toxic with each other. Everyday on twitter when some fan post about skr or SS the hnt and NH fandom reply with other post exactly the same to get more likes or cause they think SS fans are attacking them (???) this is crazy for me and already happened to me and it was not even my intention. They ended up with ALL the love I had for NH. I can’t even believe I was a fan years ago and now I can’t even like fanart. The fandom culture of attacking people and fighting all the time has to end.
You are so right, anon.
Especially the last part of your text: I remember some years ago, when I was still more involved in the fandom and the fans on Tumblr in general were more active, there was a literal storm of hate between SS and NH fans. I don't even know where it came from at that time, but just like you I felt like I started to like NH a little less because of this, and thinking back I find that really really sad. I used to ship them almost as much as SasuSaku - it was my comfort ship after reading the first Gaiden chapter and feeling horrible because of the shock it brought. Now I can't even remember the last time I visited the NH tag because it all became so damn toxic.
Not saying it's only NH fans who started the war because that's not true. But it was hate coming from toxic NH fans that made me lose some interest in the ship. Not completely, fortunately, but I can't enjoy it the way I used to.
I'm gonna end this post with your quote because it's so important:
The fandom culture of attacking people and fighting all the time has to end.
Preach.
#anon ask#sasusaku#not tagging this with the other ship#feel like it would be crosstagging#although this is no anti post at all#ship wars
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Okay so I'm making my own post cause something just ground my gears a bit
Kind of a rant but also not really
Mostly just about one of those oddball that mostly writes those inane grindset mindset quotes and it just seems so rooted in propaganda and dogma. Cultish in a sense. Plus they're just annoying and boring to me. Like "Sorry The Grind™ gave you a curfew and told you no recess, don't see why you gotta hassle others about it though..."
So there's some knucklehead with weird grind mindset quotes (lots of "pick yourself up by ya bootstraps" and "you should utilize your depression as FUEL to make something and be productive!!!!" type of stuff which is obviously inherently incorrect and is more likely to simply add guilt to someone who is already self hating and really doesn't want to be caught in their depression episode in the first place- which has very real effects on the mind and body and even metabolism and immune system, effects that are studied and documented)
Anyway that mindset annoyed me if only because there's so many that are so vocal online and they always feel super condescending and just... Out of touch with reality?? Like yes determination is very good and hard work is something to admire but it's really only when it's put to something one is passionate about or that someone places great importance on.
Feels like weird propaganda and dogma. "Work yourself to death for something that you don't care about to prove your worth" is how it reads to me which just feels like it's being whispered by a minion of a cartoon capitalist villain. Feels like the equivalent of a sheep beneath the butcher's blade trying to convince the wild herds that it's totally fine and the wild herds will reach their "true potential and worth" if they just listen to them. It just feels weird and cultish, i guess. Lot of recycled mantras and sayings that don't have much substance and that none seem to be able to define.
One of these oddballs had commented something like "and how will you deal with the real world" or something under some light-hearted cozy daydream aesthetic post about day dreaming (?). The tumblr aesthetic post was very much just.. that. Just a light-hearted post with a gif and some fluffy minded text about daydreams. Nothing harmful to it really.
Seriously... Such a bizarre response
I mean, it's such an odd thing to say unwarranted. Also what? Did this grindset mindset fellow think that single Tumblr post about daydreaming would cause someone to lose touch with reality and, i am not even sure what word to use exactly but i guess the closest would be, disassociate? Maladaptively daydream themselves into being out of touch with reality? That's not at all how either of those mental health maladies really work mind you... Both of those are serious and are not solely caused by a simple Tumblr Post... (They're caused by a variety of factors both due external stresses and internal as well as any genetic or pre existing conditions though i don't want to get into too much of tangent as this post is long enough as it is for my tastes)
Seriously though...
"how will you live in the real world"
Not entirely sure what's going through their head... A bit obtuse to be honest. What an unimaginative and inflexible mindset. A severe lack of adaptability as well, not even able to come up with a quote that could be bent to fit the narrative they wish to promote.
Besides...
Even if one were to work with the idea that the post was genuinely about daydreaming in a literal sense, about living in your own world. It still wouldn't really make sense in that case either.
One can't daydream away taxes and laws... that's just not what happens. If it was then pretty much everyone would simply not do their taxes.
Seriously... Just let folks be and let them have their fun.
Fun and allowing enjoyment into your life and seeking enjoyment is integral and fundamentally needed. Even if it's something as seemingly mundane as being able to look outside and hang out at a park. It's enrichment
Enrichment is needed for any creature, especially social intelligent creatures like humans.
One can let themselves be unapologetically passionate with harmless fun, harmless in the sense of hobbies being done in a healthy way. The hobbies' potential for danger isn't as important as making sure it's a healthy addition to your life since some hobbies like wood carving, stone knapping or rock climbing or felting come with some risk of injury but can be very fun and engaging things. Having fun is something that is very much treated as a childish and unneeded or unnecessary behavior. It's very much NOT. Enjoyment in life is integral to health. Being unapologetically passionate and excited about hobbies and such is one way to get that integral and much needed fun in one's life. Even if being excited and happy about a silly hobby is called cringe by online youtube comments and tiktokers and Instagrammers and such. Don't give folks like that your energy, don't allow them to encroach on your mind and take up your time.
Day dreaming or "living in your own world" doesn't mean you suddenly aren't aware of society's laws and perceptions and such. "Living in one's own world", especially in this context and considering the way it's used to describe and disparage someone being unapologetically excited about topics and enjoyment, just means one doesn't have to be beholden to other's perceptions tbh.
Doesn't mean they're suddenly unaware of laws or whatever.
Anyways it was so weird and just
Not needed
#rant#sorta#not really#kinda just rambling#ramble#those grindset mindset oddballs are so weird and like to pop in unwarranted unwanted and unmitigated#like seriously. be condescending and toxic somewhere else. i don't wanna listen to your self sabotaging ways. trying to induce burn out#like most- if not all- of that type of advice is basically a recipe for inducing burn-out... trying to immolate me mentally??? no thanks ✋
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*Originally posted for a YouTube post, directly copy+pasted the same text (reason why it mentions being a YouTube post). I've reposted it to Tumblr for archive sake. And cause I have to talk about Ion.
YouTube: [X]
[~☆~]
No one understands Ion like I do.
And it's my mission to make people understand.
I legit could make a whole essay on him and I unironically want to, but a YouTube post is not for that (I have a character limit…). But this is part of what I would talk about, cause his trauma is a core part of who Ion is.
Ion Christine is a deeply traumatized person who's only goal in life is revenge which is self-destructive.
His own power (that was most likely forced on him when he was a child [the youngest age he was being 9 years old]) causes him harm and yet he is reliant on it to continue forward in his desperate goal of revenge and to heal himself, if this even heals him. The power is even representative of his pain and trauma cause it hurts him every time he uses it, leaving scars on him that he has to hide with bandages he always wears.
He's a deeply traumatized person who had his childhood stolen from him that one of his main ways of coping is putting on a heroic persona. His quotes come off as something a shounen protag would say, with a hint of taunting in his tone. But then there's specifically his Korean lobby quote where it's "I decide my fate" (내 운명은 내가 결정한다). He puts on a persona to hide himself but that's what he truly wants, to regain his life, take fate into his own hands.
This is a long extra bit but ties in with his persona.
His persona can even be gotten from his alt designs which are so fitting to him and why he has my favorite designs out of the entire game. He's one of the few characters who actually fit his alt designs.
Surfer used to have these old quotes that came off as surfer dude bro, it was him having fun for once in his life.
Phantom is designed to COPY Dr. X's style to the point he looks like him, an Ion who was resigned to his doomed fate and became the very person he hated. I see it as Ion losing control and losing to Dr. X. But then there's the PLUS version of Phantom where in some places, the text for that is "Finally, Ion has cut loose the chains and shows his true colors". Ion, despite a doomed fate, will still find a way to take control and free himself.
Prince is Ion's freedom. An heir to a forgotten kingdom and he comes to claim the throne (in some instances, it reads Midas throne instead so that can be him trying to takedown or claim the Midas Group). Ion comes across happier in this, especially in doting on his owl in his sprite animation (he also has an owl for his OG self as hinted by the pin badges with the owl wearing a hat that matches his OG self's jacket pattern). He's free and living happily.
Champion is him fulfilling part of his goal: winning the Genius League. He wants to win cause he KNOWS it'll lead him directly to Dr. X because of how the winners always disappear. He looks confidant cause he knows he's one step closer to his revenge.
I just really love him. He has been infecting my brain since early 2016 when I started playing this game. I don't want him to ever leave. I don't think any character has ever had this much of an impact on me in all my life.
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Fuck tumblr
I've been scrolling through this blog for the past 2 hours. I don't even know how to feel. I guess the word "nauseous" would come to mind first. Ana tumblr has taken my fucking childhood from me and I gave it away happily.
I was fucking warned and I didn't listen. I would do anything to be able to stop my 13 year old self from ever discovering this place. I wish I could tell her that she really wasn't that fat, but the adults around her were trying to live through her and feeding her lies about how "dangerous" her very much healthy BMI was. I was just chubby. I was just a kid. I trusted everyone around me because they were adults and they were supposed to know everything, but it turns out that they were even more clueless than me.
I guess maybe when I found out that ED Tumblr, a place that is literally based on toxicity shared a few of the beliefs that these people would tell me, I should've been a bit concerned. But I wasn't. And I just fell into this rabbit hole that I don't think I will ever get out of. The things you learn here follow you forever. I can be happy and having a good day, eating something and the part of my brain that developed under the influence of this hell will remind me of some idiotic quote I read in a pretty font at 14. "once on the lips, forever on the hips", or some shit like that. And just like that, my day is ruined.
The truth is, I haven't been on here for a full year. My last post is from february 3rd 2023. It's february 6th 2024 now. I've been trying to heal, sort of. About 6 months ago, I started losing weight in a healthy(?) way. I think. I can't even tell at this point. After all these years, it's impossible to think about weight loss without triggering some horrible memories and starting some old habits again. I've had some close calls, but I haven't relapsed. I haven't starved myself the way I used to in a year. It's getting better.
I logged in today thinking I might delete this account once and for all. I decided to scroll through it and to my horror, I realized that I have repressed a lot of memories about my eating disorder. I had forgotten very big parts of my life and what my diets used to look like. I don't even know how to react and I don't have anyone to talk to about it. It's stuff that was happening a year and a half ago. One of the things I regret a lot is not journaling throughout my teenage years. But this blog has a ton of journal entries that reminded me of stuff my brain tried to erase. Like, for example. MY FUCKING THERAPIST TOLD ME THAT IF I TRULY WANTED TO LOSE WEIGHT, I WOULD???? WHat the actual fuck??????? I remember being very hurt about that and thinking about it a lot for a while, before getting back on tumblr and finding some crazy diet to do, after a while of actually doing better. If I hadn't found the post I made about it at the time, I would've probably forgotten about it forever. And there's probably so much shit that I will never remember again. The crazy thing is that although I had pretty much forgotten all of the things I wrote on here, they still hurt me somehow.
I am just so fucking angry at everything and anyone. I hate tumblr and everything about ed tumblr. My brain feels rotten from all the shit I learned here. I am getting better, but I've been having a shitty day so I guess I needed someplace to rant. I am angry at the complete lack of attention that everyone in my life gave me when it came to my diet. I used to be scared that they would find out and try to stop me from starving myself. But I slowly realized that I could show as many signs of an unhealthy diet as I wanted. Nobody ever noticed, or if they did, they just didn't give a shit. I was doing stuff that if a skinnier girl did, it would've raised a million red flags to everyone. But because I was fat, I guess it was fine.
I'm not gonna get into any more of my trauma anymore because if I start, I might just never stop writing.
I'll be 19 in two months. Everyone else I know has discovered themselves, bettered themselves, found friends and even love. All I've discovered in the past 6 years is how to lose and gain back the same 10 kg over and over and over again in the most disgusting and painful ways.
But whatever.
Life goes on. I owe it to my younger self to get better. I truly believe it's possible to do this in a healthy way. I will keep trying to be better and hopefully the anger will fade away in time and I will finally be able to heal from all of this. Someday.
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I would love to read KO’s post about Will but I can’t seem to find it 😭
I don’t understand why we gotta read dark romance, expect only the MMC to ruck up, and suddenly had to paint em as this innocent girl or woman or something, as if she did not had a fair share to will's ruin?
I’m not saying that Em didn’t hurt Will because she did I think that has been very obvious. But how he chose to cope with losing her is not on Em. Also Em can do no wrong in my eyes 🤷🏻♀️ yes she was bitchy but I support women’s rights AND wrongs! And I happened to love her bitchy attitude.
But finally when we meet emory and we saw her hurting will, we wanna change up her characterisation now?
I never said she didn’t hurt Will? What I meant was even after everything Will went through he was still close minded in viewing Em’s trauma and still refused to see that some people are forced to make tough choices. Idk maybe it’s because he has never been in a situation where he was forced to make a hard decision but for him to say
“I didn’t give a fuck about the why anymore.” — the why in question being about her abuse … is just a very weird thing to say. or for him to say “I know you know how to take a beating,” —ABSOLUTELY insane. Which is why in my eyes why should Em (which she does care bc she has held tremendous guilt for it but I feel like she shouldn’t) care about what he went through when he clearly doesn’t care about her trauma.
Em is a better person than me thats for sure. How she can easily forgive people is beyond me.
I also live in willemmy delulu land but I can do that and still hate Will 🤷🏻♀️
hey there again, Anon.
I also live in willemmy delulu land
At least this is something we all have in common.
I would love to read KO’s post about Will but I can’t seem to find it
The best way to read anything I posted about a specific character is to go to the character’s tag. I’ll tag this for will, so all you’ll have to do is click/tap his name and scroll to the bottom to get to the first posts. Start there and read what interests you. Tumblr’s search function is pretty horrendous, so it's understandable that you wouldn’t find anything if you just type 'will' into the search bar.
Or you could use the asked and answered. But I really like my will grayson tag.
Too bad there isn't a ways to filter tags, so you could look up asked and answered plus the will grayson tag.
The tag is #will grayson iii, by the way.
You didn’t really respond to anything I said, so I guess I’ll leave those alone. But I do think it’s interesting that the two quotes you pulled from were when Will was in the depths of his anger, not at all thinking about things rationally, and fighting his love for Emory with everything he had. Of course he’s going to say some of the worst things at that time. People say the most awful, hurtful things when they’re angry.
Not that it makes it right.
In reply, I’d offer:
“I dreaded dealing with her because even still – after the betrayal – I hadn’t wanted to lose her.
‘I should have come to you,’ she finally said. ‘I wish I had come to you and explained and faced you then.’
I swallowed the lump in my throat, knowing it wasn’t her fault. I wasn’t a passenger in all of this.”
And
“I should have stayed. She hadn’t needed a boyfriend. She needed a friend, and I’d been selfish and arrogant and spoiled. I should have been whatever she needed, whenever she needed me. She didn’t owe me her heart just because I wanted it. If I’d cared, I would’ve been more patient.”
And
“I love you,” he said again, “But I’ll let you go.”
And
“I’m sorry for everything,” I said.
“Me too, baby.” He kissed me. “I should’ve stayed. I’m sorry I walked away. I’m sorry I left you that day in the hallway at school.”
(had to include this one because I previously posted that he never said this directly to her. I usually skim over this scene, so I forgot it was there. I’m sorry, Will.)
My point is, Will very much did recognize that he was wrong, he recognized her trauma and that she didn’t owe him anything. He just didn’t do it right away, and let anger and resentment cloud his view of her.
You can hate Will. You may not think his words after the fact carry any weight at all, and that’s fair. I’m not demanding people love him. To me, his growth as a person is the most believable out of all the guys, and his love and devotion for Emory is the most obvious when taking the entire story into account. Which I really enjoyed (after several rounds of reading because he can be just the most insufferable person sometimes).
But that’s just me. Thanks for listening.
-KO
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Hot take: “too much corporate influence is bad” and “forced indie-ness is bad” can both be true. As some examples of what I mean by forced indie-ness, here’s some things I saw around Tumblr that inspired me to make this (one of these isn’t technically about fandom but I think you get the point in all three)
This person making a metaphor comparing the MCU (and what might have gotten shelved because of it) to McDonalds “taking over” towns and closing diverse mom-and-pop restaurants etc. but with rhetoric that seemed to imply a solution to which the restaurant equivalent would be blowing up all McDonalds locations and the corporate headquarters (employees would be allowed to leave the actual restaurants beforehand, corporate not so lucky) and building a bunch of ethnic restaurants in their place and if a worker from a minority race is out of a job never fear as there is now a restaurant serving their ethnic food near them that they and their family will be forced to be running (along with any other employees of that race that are “overflow” from who’s assigned to other restaurants of that ethnicity in that community who’d have to pretend they are family or friends of the family running) and being forced to not only keep up authenticity but keep the we-are-not-a-fancy-corporation look up in all places where there isn’t something cultural they could put there (mismatched furniture, over-checkout-signage written on a chalkboard etc.)
This Lin-Manuel Miranda stan who made a positive claim/argument/whatever-this-is weirder than any negative ones I’ve seen his haters make about him; that instead of doing things like Disney soundtracks (no mention of his actual stage shows but presumably this guy likes In The Heights and maybe Bring It On but hates Hamilton because that’s what blew him up), Lin-Manuel Miranda should have been some kind of weird YouTuber doing StarKid-esque (but not as a part of them of course) stuff and making parodies and stuff like that and this appearance he apparently did on MBMBAM was “peak Lin-Manuel Miranda” (in terms of the kind of star this person thinks he should be). And this stan’s reasoning for wanting to basically lock his career in an indie box, well, this guy didn’t use the “Tumblr fandom terms” but it was essentially that he’s too “skrunkly scrimblo” to be involved with big corporate media (which apparently applies to Disney but not YouTube).
(the one that’s two points in one because they’re connected) While I see the point of the haters of rainbow capitalism, I think some people kinda take the whole “the first pride was a riot” narrative to too much heart and almost lose the the gay part (other than who’s doing it and jokes about “gay wrath month”) in favor of envisioning metaphorically (but only metaphorically because that’s not literally all the kinds of “killing and violence and killing and violence” they want to commit in the name of the cause) throwing bricks at cops until the streets run red with their blood. The other kinda-connected thing because it’s also a thing that’s against rainbow capitalism technically is this post I saw talking about how “good queer content” can never be found in mainstream media but things like (to paraphrase despite the quotes) “pre-code novels you’d probably never read” “foreign-language movies you’d be too turned off by the language-barrier to watch” “obscure YouTube series made by a friend of a friend” etc. in a tone that suggests if e.g. the YouTube series blew up or the foreign film got an English-language remake that changed nothing script-wise but the obvious cultural-marker stuff but kept the gay romance intact they’d automatically cease to be good queer rep because too many people liked them
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I'm pissed enough that I typed "Fucking hell" into the search bar instead of tumblr, so you know how this post begins
Fucking hell I'm frustrated this morning, things are even worse with mom than they were last night
She's apparently been doing stuff like contacting habitat for humanity to see if they do home repairs because she's so worked up into a huge dither over this and how one guy saw a picture (of a fucked up floor, a floor fucked to begin with) and said that he thought the floor needed repair too
He probably thinks that it needs tiles cut for it, when that floor isn't tiled, it's fucking stickers over particle board basically... remember, last guy in here was a butt fuck moron
But can I get my mom to understand this? Can I get her to understand that we're not looking at $1000 quote to catastrophe range, that we're looking at $1000 quote vs less money cause we buy a toilet ourselves range?
100% I can not
I had a miserable sleep cause, you know... I actually have really bad social anxiety. If we're honest I think I straight up have some agoraphobia cause I hate going out unless it's dark cause I don't want anyone to see me
So guess what I don't want to do, basically politely grill a plumber over pricing
I fucking hate the thought of this so much. I'll be able to snap into faking it mode and make it work I'm sure, but I almost would rather way over spend than have to ask questions. This is why I wish I could just do everything myself, avoid having to talk to most people
So I'm already miserable, I feel like shit, I slept like shit... but then I have to deal with my mom catastrophic but in overdrive mode
I mean fuck, there is literally a decent tile floor underneath this shitty one. Dipshit literally covered up a lot of better floor with really bad floor, I can see it next to the doorjamb (there's a "b" at the end of this word!?)
Just like... am I making sense?
There's no way my mom's going to apologize when this is all over and works out fine. She's... she's really fucking... like not hurt my feelings, but like injured and caused me harm by way of stress, and she's not going to say sorry, and she'll do this again in a bit because she refuses to fucking grow up and learn to just sit with discomfort
Sometimes you say "well we'll know tomorrow" instead of fucking refusing to listen to your kid who has pulled miracles out of their ass over and over for you, and who has evidence to back stuff up, and trying to figure out how to tap your 401k and lose disability to avoid disappointing your asshole of a mother
Like I'm sure I sound mean but like... is it at least understandable why?
She always pulls this shit, always, and I've been having to emotionally regulate her like this since I was literally like 2 according to my dad (he told a very different story about the one time I threw a tantrum, where I was upset cause I wanted one stuffed animal, and my mom wanted another, and it beat my 2 year old ass up trying to pick between making myself or my mom happy since we could only afford one, and he was saying that my mom was kind of throwing a tantrum almost as much as I ended up doing it... then he came back and bought both later)
I don't know... just kill me
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