#thinking very fucking hard about this

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

thinkin' about Bardaby and his illusion smoke...

#went on yet another bardaby bender. these are only part of it lmao #i am often seized by the fatal need to Draw Barnaby In Some Shape Or Form #but yes. thinking very hard about the illusion smoke #i feel like sometimes he uses it recreationally... mixed with other stuff to dilute it ofc #but it keeps the color! #im imagining that it can act sort of like a Mood Ring! #the core color that he exhales yk yk! #but using it full strength for proper illusions and such #he's gotta be careful about it! it'll fuck him up! #he's built up Quite The Resistance to illusions and illusion magic over his life #but everyone has their limits... #scribble salad #wh fantasy au #IM NOT USED TO DRAWING SMOKE. IT LOOKS BAD LMAO #i'll have to work on that! look up tutorials! Practice! #anyhow i think the other scribbles need their own post #its mainly bardaby and our little warlock... #there are three ways i love drawing barnaby #i love scribbling him angry. i love scribbling him with howdy. and i love scribbling him being soft w/ wally #side note i realized earlier that part of the reason why i love characters who are just so much bigger than everyone else #ex: poppy & barnaby #is bc then its like. they're the smaller guys' personal jungle gym lmao #free bed! free climbing wall! free bean bag! free Getting Tossed Around!!!! #all wrapped up with the wonderful bow of Friend!!!! #...my touch starvedness is showing isnt it. away with ye demons!!!

[clown-owo]

a little bit obsessed with this guy

#og post #my art #WxS #wonderlands x showtime #project sekai #pjsk #rui kamishiro #tsukasa tenma #ruikasa #i will not tag emu or nene because they are kind of in the background. even though i tried very hard on them #<- first time drawing any of these guys #i'll be honest i haven't even done much of the stories at all just WxS's main story and One Event Story (the first rui one i think) #had to learn what the fuck is goin on with tsukasa's goddamn jacket. what the fuck is on the sides. i lied i didn't learn #i just drew it #i drew rui's outfit and went aw fuck now i have to draw tsukasa's #the ruikasa isn't important like yeah sure its ruikasa but what's important is rui's strange love language #that one 4koma about rui's flowchart leading 2 an explosion stunt? courting ritual /hell

[keepthetension]

this was made especially for those of us who cut ties with our shitty families, huh

i cried so much this whole episode. i know that i can't be in that house and be who i am at the same time, but the guilt and shame never really go away. i love that this episode said, wholeheartedly: fuck what society says, you should be wherever allows you to be happiest

anyway! you always hear that family estrangement is rare in asian communities, but i did it! and you can do it, too! dump your shitty family! i believe in you~

#tsukuritai onna to tabetai onna #it's incredible like i don't think i fully realized how ashamed i feel until this episode had me ugly crying into my blankie #especially because the abuse was invisible and people say: oh everyone's family says harsh things! it's because they care! they love you! #and no matter how hard you try to explain the magnitude of what was done to you people still shrug and say but they're *family* #not that there was ZERO physical abuse but like. that's just How It Is in the community i grew up in so it's not a Reason reason #and that's all aside from all that's expected of me as the child of an asian family (that i am simply doing none of) #FUCK i guess i just compartmentalized all of this so securely i didn't think it could bleed out anymore #thanks tsukutabe. i guess? #this show is RELENTLESSLY coming for me this season too like explicitly stated asexual rep? a treat for me personally! #idk i never expected an asian drama to be so clear about this especially because kasuga's abuse was invisible too #and the idea of not sacrificing yourself for your parents is COUNTER to what you're supposed to do #i am just VERY EMOTIONAL right now #i love kasuga so much and it was rough to see her going through it but i am SO HAPPY that she's accepted and loved

[the-holy-ghosted]

and then he didnt

#hello terror fans. have a silly #the terror #the terror 2018 #the terror amc #the heron giveth #uhhhhh. what do people. tag #harry goodsir #james fitzjames #silna #lady silence #ummmmm #uh um uhm. is that it #anyways! im normal about this show <- visibly twitching #everybody lets play a game of GUESS OPS FAVORITE CHARACTER while i post this after 849328479832 goodsilna posts in a row. hard mode #i think about james' gay little coat all the time why is he wearingthat. the fucking cape #hes very crudely drawn but i think everybody will understand what im going for. his little outfit is so funny #anhywhays there will be more of these. many more. im not stopping now

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #jrwi suckening spoilers #jrwi the suckening #arthur bennett #HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT? #LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT #this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page. #but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT #ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH #WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW? #ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME #DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER #HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW #AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE #I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much.... #AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game #but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping #DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds #I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors #what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012. #almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS. #only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE #while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs #THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN #WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS #the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess. #i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band #EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION

[pepperpixel]

+ Butch 4 Butch +

(Except neither one of them is rlly that butch but holy fUCKING SHIT THAT SONG IS LITERALLY THEM… the version of them I made up in my mind palace… it’s them.)

Anywayyyy. Yeah! Have a tagr art dump..! aka, those vibes when you, out of a series of moments of temporary insanity, end up finding, taking in, nursing back to health and eventually falling into a tangled messy yearning situationship w the asshole tsundere alien who tried to destroy your entire planet… rlly extremely relatable vibes!!

#invader zim #gaz membrane #tak #invader tak #tagr #iz tak #iz gaz #doodles #caption for the 3rd pic: #ton ten photos taken seconds before a goth girls plushie security system shoots you in the head. #anyway… yeah… I love these two #I think a lot my ideas for them are informed by this one fanfic I read as a young teen/child… but I don’t actually remember anything #concrete?? just general story beats? and I’m pretty sure my ideas deviate from it a good bit. but #I think that fic def formed the basis for my tagr love and appreciation #I think they could be complicated and messy and painful and fun as fuck #I have ideas for them lol. and some more art. so hopefully I’ll be able to post that soon too #but for now… enjoy sketch dump of messy goth saphics #*top ten moments. not ton. spellings hard ghgh #I think tak is very hesitant about initiating physical contact and intimacy and being cuddly. cuz of pride and also repression #but I saw a post talking about irkens being naturally very touchy feely affectionate and I def agree… #so. tak is wary of stuff like that at first. but once u break thru that initial barrier of her denying herself she’s actually sUPER TOUCHY #gaz has unleashed a pda beast she just doesn’t kno it yet

[scintillyyy]

also i think there's a tendency to cherrypick tim's moments of morally grey thought musings as a gotcha for the idea that tim is totally cool with murder and just one bad day away from shanking someone only kept in line by the "rules", when in reality. tim's thoughts of moral greyness, the ruminations on what they're doing and why they're doing it the way they do and why they can't cross the line they set. he's not. alone in that. like. at ALL. dick has reckoned with wanting to kill someone (sigh. the joker). dick lowkey didn't want to give someone a chance at redemption simply because he hurt bruce (bane). bruce has thought about killing (and almost killed) both the joker & black mask. bruce is very frequently ruminating on his role and why he can't kill even if he wants to. barbara has very seriously considered killing and has wanted to kill. cassandra has killed and used that as the basis of her staunch belief that nobody dies tonight, but she's also still in frequent conversation with what that means ethically and morally. tim having doubts or trying to remind himself why they do what they do or debating their rules to himself is not some grand outlying abnormality here, it's par for the fucking course.

#barbara almost headshotted black mask but tim made a joke about using guns he's clearly barely refraining from killing someone /s #sorry. just. it's like tim always gets called out for this in particular and he's not even the worst offender #this is fucking gun batman's fault isn't it. he's my worst enemy for a reason and the worst mistake ever #was bringing him back after the one stupid story like he's some kind of inevitability when the point #is that tim would genuinely rather die than become him. #don't talk to me about that guy (gun batman) i hate him #anyways the point is that they're all in conversation with themselves about why they do what they do #it's actually super important that they are! because it's very human to want to go against your morals if it seems easier #and the point is that it takes strength of character to make a conscious choice to do what you think is right #even when it's hard and it's the last thing you want to do

[ilynpilled]

A Game of Thrones - Catelyn X

A Clash of Kings - Catelyn VII

A Storm of Swords - Jaime I

A Storm of Swords - Jaime III

A Storm of Swords - Jaime III

A Storm of Swords - Jaime IV

Jaime & Passive Suicidal Ideation

His statements and actions concerning the subject are framed as him not being afraid. But he is. He is afraid of what he has become, afraid of confronting himself, afraid of confronting the world, and he is afraid of having to live.

He should not be brave enough to die. He should be brave enough to live.

#i dont think a lot of ppl acknowledge that pre hand loss jaime kinda wants to fucking die deep down #especially when he forgets his fixation on cersei #it is such an interesting obsession that he has with a ‘chivalrous’ death #he completely romanticizes this idea despite his dissillusionment with knighthood #again death is so much easier than confronting the moral paradoxes dilemmas and his self-concept #he is deep down very aware about what he has become and he desperately seeks purpose in just dying with sword in hand #and he does not even reconsider until brienne confronts him and reveals this ideation for what it is #it is cowardice on his part #it is a facade of bravery masking self loathing #dying is easy living is hard #honestly jaime pre handloss was basically just a man slowly destroying himself #and it seeps back sometimes during affc too #hed rather die than end up facing damnation despite all of his efforts #now damnation that is something he is terrified of #valyrianscrolls #asoiaf #jaime lannister

[sandinmybed]

can i be fr for a minute?? sending abuse to people online for holding different views than you is not activism and in fact actively hurts your cause. most people are not extreme in their viewpoints, you can give them a new perspective if you're willing to spend some time explaining shit. if someone is saying something you disagree with and you rush in there to condescend to them and call them disgusting and subhuman and dont even TRY to explain calmly why their views are harmful, they're going to shut you out instantly and double down on their views.

most people are simply genuinely ignorant to the issues they're talking about - they just pick their views up from the news and the world around them and express opinions because that's what every person does. if you run in there and tell them they're scum for it, what then? if someone does that to you, are you going to think "maybe i should do some research" or are you going to think "this person is an asshole, im blocking them." a lot of you think you're activists and then refuse to do any kind of actual WORK to support your cause.

#this is not about the isr*el thing even tho thats obviously a huge issue rn #its just a pattern ive observed online #im not saying you have to be kind to people who oppress you dont twist my words #but if youre trying to support any cause and you think calling people names is going to help #youre a fucking idiot lol #people call themelves activists and pro-X cause because they called their opposition dirty c*nts online #how the hell is that meant to help anyone? theyre just going to retreat into their propaganda chambers because you proved what the leaders #of those spaces have been telling them #you can obvs block people if you dont want to deal w them but thats a neutral action. sending abuse harms ur cause. #text #like educating ignorant people is hard work! yeah! its also the entire fucking point of activisim #and if you think its too much effort then just stop pretending you give a shit tbh #like my parents managed to change our neighbour's very xenophobic stance on migrants with a calm conversation #some people will listen and some wont and shes not exactly going out to protests for migrants rights but shes not hostile anymore #and a lot of yall think that isnt good enough but let me tell you it IS good because these things take time! #unlearning things is MUCH harder than learning them in the first place and a lot of people grew up in environments that taught them #very discriminatory and conservative views and its actually not their fault. and its hard to educate yourself differently on something you #have no idea is not true. where do you start w that?

[coolestclowns]

Coolest kids ever

#i think them both reffering to the other as their uncle is so fun #they are uncles #to eachother #also i've been fucking around with my art style a little bit lately 👀 trying very hard to keep off art block #i think they should get to find a similar intrest they can be annoying about together #dndads #dndaddies #dndads s2 #dungeons and daddies #hermie the unworthy #hermie unworthy #hermie #hermie dndads #taylor dndads #taylor swift dndads

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I'm in love with your drawing of Wally and Howdy fighting over the arm. I love how mad Poppy is. Her saying "is2g" gave me the idea that she starts cussing more the longer she has to deal with this bs. And I'm also imagining Frank leaning against Eddie's hat saying "oh Eddie we're really in it now"

10 out of 10 artwork. Good job. No notes.

it has been Well Received it seems! i'm very pleased, i was hoping i wouldn't be the only one who found it funny ahaha

and i couldn't resist:

#if poppy knew swears she would probably end up using them yeah #but none of them know swears! if i scribble them swearing its for Comedic Effect! #because children's show puppets saying 'fuck' is peak humor imo #thinking very hard about the four of them and their experiences together #wh lights out au #scribble salad #rambles from the bog #god. one day i want to fuckin Write this au. #because i dont have it in me to plan out scribbles and draw 'comics' for it In Order #so yall are just getting bits and pieces from random parts #i do want to write it though #i need to know them i need to Know Them for that #their speech patterns their likes their dislikes their vernacular their voices their emotions their opinions and quirks #hopefully this desire to write for it persists through that point #i suppose i could... write a shitty rough draft #a very bland rough draft that would just be the basics... #that could make it easier for future me to edit and tweak and ReWrite #i am Considering.... #hopefully i manage to write the Actual au and not just the aftermath which takes up 90% of the au's room in my head #but that is something i won't be talking about! #if the au gets written it'd be a Massive Spoiler! plus i'd probably write th aftermath as a companion sequel! maybe two! #for the different perspectives of course. or it would be a bonus fic where each chapter is a snapshot... hm thinking Thinking...

[tradingjack]

roadside tongari snack break

#is the joke too niche?? whatever #did some digital doodling while i was sick bc i did Not trust my hands to stay steady enough to work on a traditional piece #i feel a bit better now. still working through some congestion but i dont feel on the verge of passin out no more 👍 #nicholas d. wolfwood #vash the stampede #tongari the snack #trigun #98 or trimax continuity idc #either way i need to draw wolfwood with scruff or i Die #drawing #comic #illustration #artists on tumblr #small artist #manga #my art #fanart #not explicitly vashwood BUT. drawn with it in mind :3 #anyway tongari the chip has to exist somewhere on no man's land for wolfwood to nickname vash after it. right #somehow this very specific japanese snack made it #ik nightow did not think that hard about worldbuilding but fuck it. tongari chips on no man's land

[sleepyblr-heart]

this'll hurt you more than it'll hurt me

#heart art! #adventure forward #af2 #cyalm #celesteal #verfection #YAYYY I DIIDDD ITTTTT #no background cause i nono wanna but YAYYYYYYYYYY #i really love this. im very proud of it dawg #ill be so honest. i do not think i would've like vain revival if it came out. #the idea of not only bringing back cyalm n then also making their evil deeds an unwilling action so that they can be redeemed is. so stupid #but the ideas presented by verfection....... mmmmm #im glad they arent canon bc i can give them so many problems man #insert like an essay on why verfection/2ss is the best character in adventure forward here #maybe a 'stratos verf blueband and voixer are like realy fucked up quadruplets. please listen to me im only stretching a little i prommy' #essay as well #and a 'adventure forward wouldve been better if they just fucking Talked to Eachother a Little Bit More and maybe kiss but idc abt that' #essay as a final desert #im trying real hard not to turn my tags into a 10000 word essay again #so please imagine those essays for me instead. do the hardwork for me #anyways immmm noraml about guys that arent actually real. and that are definelty not just like an oc in a trench coat (silly) #ok i need to stop talking enjoy freeaks byee

[sadisthetic]

hanbok!!! for fun!

#just because i wanted to see my favorite boys in them #ninjago #ninjago jay #ninjago kai #jay walker #my art #i feel like with the sheer amount of orientalism thats in the show i feel like i have full freedom to draw the fuck i was as an asian dude #for the record i actually dont headcanon either of them as korean i hc kai as japanese which like #i feel like he couldnt be anything else? as the one of the two characters in this show who are actually strongly japanese coded? #like waves hand he could be mixed but he at Least needs to be part japanese #but thats not my personal headcanon tho i just generally headcanon him as japanese #and ninjago doesnt have fucking countries and theyre just legos i know but like #the world is def still based on this one. so gestures very hard. #i do what i want. #and also i headcanon jay as a one fourth chinese wasian who never fucking realizes hes part chinese BC HE NEVER MET HIS MOM #this is funny to me personally #he will never know..... im normal about jay never meeting his mom i swear. #anyways all these tags are irrelevant to the art drawing them in hanbok was just sheer indulgence #lemme have this #(bc sometimes i think about s4 specifically and scream) #closes eyes. at least s4 had best episode ninja roll at least.