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drdemonprince · 6 months

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have you defined the meaning of “white woman brain” anywhere and if not, can you? /gen

Many Black and brown feminist writers have discussed this phenomenon and I encourage you to seek out a lot of writing about this subject, because there are a variety of perspectives, but to distill it, white woman fragility brain is a phenomenon that is not exclusive to either white people or to women, but is especially common among those who can weaponize white womanhood, and it consists of the following qualities:

A view of oneself as a helpless victim that is constantly in threat of being attacked, especially by strangers (even though statistically, this is not the case).

A refusal to consider oneself as capable of doing harm to others, especially a lack of consideration toward others' body autonomy or consent. (even while being highly concerned about one's own autonomy and consent).

A generally passive or passive-aggressive orientation toward the world: seeing oneself as a romantic or sexual object to be approached, but never wanting to initiate (or feeling that one never can), never feeling comfortable directly communicating displeasure or one's desires, believing that others instead must guess at it. (and then resenting people when they don't, but never expressing it).

A tendency to cry, excessively berate oneself, complain about being made to feel "unsafe," or give up when criticized or challenged, especially when challenged by people of color.

A tendency to associate a person's body type with how much of a threat they are. For example, feeling unsafe around people with penises and expecting a social space to accommodate that fear to cater to you, a fear of people who come from cultures where it's common to speak loudly, a fear of those who are large, assertive, and/or darker-skinned.

Instinctive fawning-type responses to stress, and a pattern of feigning happiness, agreeability, and ease when one is not genuinely feeling it, and expecting all other people (but especially other women) to feign happiness as well, paired with a deep-seated resentment of anyone who violates this illusion and expresses any negativity (being especially punitive toward women of color).

Instinctively "smoothing over" conflict between other people before it even begins, even when healthy conflict is necessary and not at all your business-- often performed by gossiping behind other people's backs, triangulating information when it is not yours to share, asking people to alter their behavior in order to avoid a reaction from somebody else, presenting your concerns as if they were somebody else's ("what will people think!"), tone-policing the airing of grievances, derailing hard conversations with more light-hearted topics, and excluding people who are known to be candid and assertive.

Here are some articles on elements of the phenomenon and why it is so dangerous:

Now, I single white cis women out a lot when I am describing this phenomenon, because they have the most to gain from exhibiting these qualities, but make no mistake: this is a pattern that many types of people can and do use. I have seen white trans women use white women's tears to silence critique. I have witnessed women of color being passive-aggressively derailed and silenced by a Black manager who was in a position of institutional power over them. Multiple of the women who sexually harassed me in the story linked above were not white. And LORD knows I see plenty of t boys falling back on this shit, as well as cis men from wealthy backgrounds. It's a mindset that has deep colonial roots and we all must be on the look out for it in ourselves and others, and we must be vigilant in uprooting it.

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ovaruling · 1 year

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i know we are all critical of buccal fat removal and that many women get very weirdly defensive abt it and try to leverage that critics of it don’t know firsthand and i just want to offer up that i had buccal fat removal when i was 24 (? i cant even remember now—i was in a bad place after an abusive relationship and was getting invasive cosmetic surgeries done left and right) so i CAN actually tell you with firsthand experience to NOT do it. it IS as bad as everyone is telling you. it IS as ruinous as we are saying. it DOES butcher your face irreparably. so pls don’t come at me being like “you have no idea how would you even know” cuz lmao i literally did it. i fell for the lie. i cannot reverse it, i cannot fix it. i regret it every day of my life. i will never have my face back. don’t fall for the lie cuz it IS a lie.

i had thee absolute top surgeon in my state and it was still a lie. i did everything he said and my recovery was “perfect” and it was still a lie.

it’s not “haters” who are “jealous” of you saying you’re scheduling your buccal fat removal surgery. it’s a not-insignificant number of women like me who fell for that shit and yknow what, now i AM jealous of you, ironically, bc you haven’t yet gone through with it. cuz you still have your own wonderful natural face and you have the option to decide not to be stupid and jeopardize it. you think you know now but you unfortunately don’t until it happens, until your face begins to cave in on itself, until you’re told that you now “need” xyz procedures to support the cheeks you just sucked out etc etc it never ends it never fucking ends you will never be satisfied and you can’t ever undo it

i have this unfortunate insider knowledge of at least 4 different major invasive cosmetic procedures and i regret every single one. they ruined my life in every conceivable way (even though i was considered a major success patient) and one surgery literally almost killed me. i thought i was so damn smart and resilient until i realized i can’t ever go back.

the “doing it for myself” speech stops mattering real fuckin quick when you’re alone in your room looking in your mirror wondering how anyone could’ve let you do this. i am not an outlier. i am a common statistic. you are not immune. don’t let them have your face.

#i am venting bc i am having severe ptsd abt this still and sometimes it builds up #i see women just. falling for it. like me. and i feel like cassandra #i was so so so stupid. so fuckjgn stupid #love your faces. they’re yours

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theminecraftbee · 1 month

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actually, out of the tags and further explanation: so I actually REALLY LOVE that mcc is like, canonizing making predictions about game and event winners like this, as well as making stats more accessible and explicitly part of the game like this.

the thing is—okay so I know stats are blamed for a lot of what’s wrong with mcc fandom but stats are FUN. sports predictions are FUN. being kind of competitive about sports predictions is FUN. have you ever done an ncaa bracket with your family. or played fantasy baseball. or fantasy football. or hell, have you watched a jon bois video that’s actually some of his sports writing. FUN, RIGHT? and stats are a really common way for a sports/competition fan to engage with their hobby, so like, there is no avoiding “people will try to make mcc predictions” and “people will stat out the teams” and “people will be competitive about those predictions”, it’s one of the most common modes of the sports fan, it’s an accessible form of engagement even when the team you are personally a fan of isn’t in the game (because you can be temporarily a fan of the one you’ve decided to gamble on winning), and it’s not gonna go away.

(the actual stakes of gambling aren’t required and I actually do not recommend outside of like, you get a stupid gold plastic trophy from a friend, do not get involved in sports gambling it’s a predatory industry and there is basically no “safe” threshold there, I am talking more about the inherent fun of “getting competitive about your team winning”.)

the problem has in the past been that players see it and get placed under pressure/upset/etc about it, because unlike Sports, the mcc players have very direct lines of interaction with their fandom. it’s VERY EASY to take a prediction as an attack, especially when combined with competitiveness, which is why I think a lot of people suggest forbidding talking about stats or tiers, getting rid of stats, etc.

but the thing is that won’t work. for one, it’s removing one of the biggest sports fan modes of engagement and therefore removing your own fandom. but also people aren’t going to NOT do stats! like, even the players will probably start keeping track of stats if stats were removed! so the solution instead needs to be to make stats more individual, to remove some of the pressure of the stats, and to lean into the stuff about it that makes it FUN.

therefore: the kudos system and predictions. it’s not trying to get rid of the inevitable fandom interaction, it’s embracing it, but it’s doing it in a way that removes pressure from players.

for example, note that the kudos have a focus on personal bests! this encourages players to compete but means even “lower-tier” players will probably get them! at the same time, by globally sharing overall records, it continues to celebrate and encourage great performances! plus, by making some of the stats really stupid, it both gives statheads NEW things to focus on that aren’t coins—the punching statistic for example is gonna be so fun—removing some of the pure pressure to perform in score alone and the centralization of discussion around it—and also gives players silly records to aim for if they aren’t the kind of player who’d aim for a more “traditional” high score.

as for the predictions, they’re gonna do two things. first, it embraces “yeah the community loves doing predictions” by adding a competitive aspect to it—can you beat the odds and predict who will win everything? the wordle-like ability to copy/paste how you did at the end of the event is truly genius because it makes it SUPER EASY to share and discuss for even casual fans. it will increase engagement and discussion. it’ll ALSO help demonstrate to players, by showing the percentage of correct predictions on screen, how… inaccurate… predictions often are. sure, you can guess who the better players and teams will be, but as anyone who did sexyman knows, single-round games can have upsets. and it celebrates those upsets! it turns it from “no one believed in us” (sad) to “we were the underdogs hell yeah look at us go!”

anyway as someone who likes engaging with sports and competitions by being a little competitive and watching the stories the numbers tell: I adore these changes FANTASTIC changes they’re gonna be so fun day-of let’s go mcc,

#mcc #I DONT KNOW IF IM PHRASING THIS ALL WELL #BUT HONESTLY I ADORE THIS DIRECTION. EXCELLENT STUFF.

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antiyourwokehomophobia2 · 2 months

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Man, this pisses me off so bad. If you're a woman who relates more to males than other women, it's because you've decided to focus more on how you're different from other women rather than how you're like them. You will literally never have more in common with males, and males do not feel the same way about you. These cute little posts that you write about how you love males more than your fellow women? They do not write the same thing about you. They hate and mock you constantly. Anyone remember "Cis women need to shut up"

"As a cis woman, I agree"

"You need to shut up, specifically"

Yea, that's how they feel about you and your solidarity.

The difference between lesbians and trans women in female spaces is the fact that lesbians do not have high rates of violence. There is no group of women that outclass men in terms of violent tendencies. Trans women retain the rates of male violence that regular men do. I'm not saying you have to treat trans women like they're all violent beasts, but if you can't see why female people would be uncomfortable with male people in their spaces, you're either naive or genuinely unsympathetic towards the very real fear that women have of being subjected to male violence. You can't say trans women and lesbians are similar because, unlike males, there is no statistical evidence that lesbians are highly likely to take advantage of a woman. If it turned out that 98% of rapes were committed by lesbians, I would 1000% understand why straight women don't fucking want to be around me. Have some fucking empathy, holy fucking shit. Even if you are completely on board with trans women being in female spaces, at LEAST acknowledge that it makes sense for women to be concerned about who is allowed in their spaces. It's crazy how I could tell someone I have a fear of dogs because one bit me when I was a kid, and they'd put their sweet pooch up, but God forbid a woman be cautious around a demographic who commit 90% of all violent crime. Oh no. That woman is suddenly a terf bitch.

I have nothing in common with trans women. I don't care how much pain they have experienced. We are not the same. When I was twelve, I cried and I cried as I put my palms together to pray to a God I hoped would be able to take away my homosexuality. I didn't even grow up in a particularly homophobic family. Both of my parents were accepting of me, but I still sat in the dark of my room, tears streaming down my face, as I prayed to have my sexuality changed.

Two years later, one of my friends made a joke about me dressing to impress my crush. She said my crushes name---a feminine name. A girl sitting in earshot heard her, turned to me, and asked me with disgust if I was gay. I said no without even thinking about it. It absolutely did not help that we were in a locker room with other girls. I was aware of my sexuality by that point, but I was 14 and unable to hold my own against a girl looking at me like THAT. For a few weeks after that, that girl made comments about how she was "watching me".

I know pain, I know discomfort, I know what it's like to feel predatory. Seeing feminine women, especially if they're white, makes me feel like an alien. I look at them and think "how are we so different? I see none of myself in you."

Sometimes I'm right. Sometimes we're not similar at all. But guess what? That doesn't mean I'm similar to a straight male. Fucking hell, sometimes I'm not similar to other lesbians. That's completely normal. I think OP needs to read better work by cishet women. If you think that there is not a single piece of cishet female writing that can move you more than something written by a male, you're not looking in the right places at all. I don't understand why some LB women seem to think that the very act of someone being a straight woman makes them incapable of relatability. Of course it makes sense for you to be cautious. Lesbians deal with a lot of alienation and predatory feelings, but if the very ACT of a woman being cis and straight makes you feel like she has absolutely nothing in common with you...? The issue lies with you. YOU are the one othering THEM. Not the other way around. You're the one who has decided that a few cis straight women othering you means that they ALL will so you'd better beat them to the punch. You're the one who has decided that your relationship to womanhood is so astronomically different from straight women that nothing they say speaks to you. That's INSANE. Do you realize how much you have to alienate yourself from womanhood to feel more relatability with a male person than a female one? Idk how to tell you this, but it is highly probable that the most cis, most het woman you have ever met has had a period. It's highly likely she's been harassed by a man. It's highly likely she's been made to feel inferior by way of being born female. No, they can't relate to the experience of being a lesbian who is made to feel predatory for no reason, but to say that nothing a cis het woman says/experiences can move you at all? Nothing they say can make you feel like your experience with womanhood and hers are similar? Do you realize how you sound? "Trans women have been harassed by men and made to feel inferior, too!!" Okay! So you should be able to relate to cis women in the way you do trans women, right?

I told my discord server that I was nervous about my future roommates. I showed them photos and someone said "all this tells me is that they're feminine and white" and I literally think about that all of the time. I was projecting. I was so scared that these white, feminine, probably straight women were going to judge me for being a black lesbian that I didn't even realize that I was the one violently judging them based off of nothing but their skin color and their femininity. I knew nothing about them. I STILL know nothing about them. I've barely spoken to them. But already I had labeled them as unrelatable judgemental women because of how they looked. Hold on. Wasn't I the one afraid of them judging ME? How could I be so afraid of them judging me for being a black lesbian when I was the one judging them already? What sense does that make?

You guys are so busy writing off cis straight women as unrelatable bigots that you've failed to see that you're the one who is extremely prejudiced against them. And I absolutely fucking know someone is gonna read this and say "well, you can't say that all trans women have male violence patterns and dahdahdahdah" and it's like. But YOU can say that cis straight women are so unbelievably different from lesbian women that you'd rather say you're more similar to a straight up fucking male???

I'm not saying it's not a little jarring to see women who are so different from me. I'm not saying I haven't been burned before and there's no reason for me (or other lesbians) to be cautious. But I will literally ALWAYS have more in common with cishet women than I ever will a man pretending to be a woman.

One time I had a professor. She was on the older side (I'd say 40's) and white. Not the type of person I'd think I'd click well with. She was straight and married with children. One day we talked after class, and the only thing that ended our conversation was the fact she had an event she had to go to. We would've talked longer if not for that. She emailed me a little while later to tell me that she enjoyed our chat. After that, she actually hugged me on two occasions. You wouldn't think we'd have common ground. An older, straight, married white mother and a young black lesbian. Both of us are "cis" but I can tell you I relate to her much better than I ever could someone born male.

I once had a personal trainer who was a feminine woman. She had acrylic nails and everything. One time she said that she couldn't hug her male friends anymore because she had a boyfriend (he wasn't the one enforcing that rule. That was something she personally felt). Also not someone I thought I'd click well with. But we did. One time we had a really productive discussion that was actually derived from the conversation with my professor. I felt very close to her in that moment. Our conversation came to a close because she had another client, but I still think about that convo.

There have been so many fucking times where I thought "this woman is not like me. Look at her." But what I realized was that I was the judgmental one. I was the one deciding we were different, not her. I was the one writing her off. I was the one convinced we had nothing in common.

I am BEGGING you not to alienate your fellow women. There are no inherent traits that make you unable to relate to other women. No amount of whiteness or cisness or straightness can make a woman completely unreachable. I am NOT talking about political parties or views so don't fucking try me with that shit. Obviously that puts a wedge between people, but someone simply being born cis and het does not make them alien from you. For God's sake, look at the fucking MeToo movement. Women from all fucking backgrounds who share an experience that an unfortunate amount of women go through. Women from all different races, sexualities, etc. who came together to talk about how they've been subjected to sexual violence. Ellen degeneres was one of them. How does that fit into your "lesbians and cishet women cannot relate to each other" spiel?

OP's post has 130k notes and it makes me fucking sick. Holy crap y'all, we need more solidarity than this. Other women are not your enemy. I'm begging you to reconsider your approach to women who are different than you. You are missing out on people who can love and support you in a way that literally no male can. You are depriving yourself. Just because a few cishet women in the past alienated you, does not mean that you have to continue their legacy. Let it go. Everyone on earth can see you embracing your hatred of women, and you wonder why your fellow women never hug you? They fucking can't! Put your hatred down and make space for the love that comes with realizing that you absolutely are like other girls!

#You guys think you're so progressive but you're just in a woke version of not like other girls #Stop comparing lesbians to literal males #Jesus fucking Christ #I actually hate you guys so fucking much #I'm never telling anyone I'm gay every again bro #I hate all of you #I should've prayed to be asexual man #Maybe god would've taken me more seriously

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hyperlexichypatia · 2 months

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One time I asked my mom (in her 70s) whether she, personally, knew any people in so-called "traditional marriages." I defined a "traditional marriage" as follows:

A man and a woman, married to each other

They are both each other's first and only spouse, neither has been married before

Neither of them has any children with any other partner

Any children they have were born after the couple was married.

After thinking about it, my mom was able to come up with a few examples of such couples. But only a few. And she had to think about it.

Yet we still live in a society where this type of family is considered "the norm" and the much more common types (blended families, single parents, divorced people) are considered "exceptions."

And this is not the only thing like this! There are many experiences/lifestyles/family types that are treated as The Default or The Norm that, in fact, may not apply to a majority at all!

Even in discussions like "We should remember that not everyone has [normative experience]," it's still framed as though the normative experience is, of course, still the statistical norm. It might not be at all! Or maybe it is the statistical norm worldwide, or nationwide, but not in your particular community, or your social circle.

Sometimes it's necessary to look at global or national statistics to correct your bias of extrapolating from your social circle. Social bubbles are a real problem. But. But. Other times. It's useful to just look at your social circle and ask yourself "Do these population-wide statistics really apply here? Should I be looking at them to determine what's 'normal' instead of just looking around me?"

So here are some things that are culturally assumed in the U.S. to be "the norm", that you might want to ask yourself: How many people do I know personally that this is actually true of? (Other countries have their own maybe-not-that-normal norms that I'm not as familiar with, but feel free to weigh in on).

How many people do you know personally who:

Have a "traditional marriage" as described above?

Have a work schedule of Monday through Friday, ending at 5:00 p.m.? i.e. for whom Saturdays, Sundays, and evenings after 5:00 are "not at work" time?

Attended residential college from ages 18 to 22, and graduated with a bachelor's degree by age 23?

Had most or all of their college tuition and living expenses paid for by their parents?

Have, as an adult, the same surname as both of their parents, who were and still are, married to each other? Which was their father's surname which their mother took at marriage? i.e. whose parents could accurately be referred to as "Mr. and Mrs. [that persons' same surname]"?

Don't take any regular daily medicine?

Depending on your social circle, you might know very few people in these categories! But you probably still hear people say unquestioned, taken-for-granted things like "We should have the meeting at 6:00, so people can come after work," or "Of course parents of college students should have a say, since they're paying for it."

In many demographics, these things aren't just "not always true"; they're hardly if ever true. I wrote here about the false assumption that college students are uniformly single, childless young adults. Are you scheduling your events on the assumption that evenings and weekends are free time? For that matter, how many child care providers serve families during the hours that most parents actually work? Are we ready to admit that these things aren't the norm yet?

#normative social assumptions #family structure #family structure shaming #shift work #addressing parents as “mr. & mrs. [child's last name]” when you have no idea whether that's accurate

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study-diaries · 2 months

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Math Tips

(Pictures are not mine)

Well, let me tell you, we all have this love-hate relationship with this subject, right? The worst part is that when you don't know what the heck is going on, so, as a girl who studied maths (2 Volumes/textbooks) on her own during the year she was homeschooled, here are some tips and tricks that I did to get an A+ in my math finals!

Get your syllabus together

In the beginning I had no damn idea what was going on and it was just confusing. I had to do the first thing I did was taken my index/table of contents and mark the chapters which i knew very well and the ones I had no clue about. And then i arranged them with the marking scheme, like which one carries the most marks etc etc and study accordingly.

Complete lessons/chapters that you already know

When you finish off the things you already know then that's gonna give you the confidence you need even if you know only 1-2 chapters, learn it throughout and make sure that you'll get the answer no matter how twisted the sum is. If you're doubtful about the whole textbook like any normal person.... Start with the easy ones. (I know there are literally really no "easy" chapters, spare me)

Harder chapters need hard work

Most chapters like Trigonometry proofs, Geometry proofs, Algebra, Graphs, Mensuration and Calculus etc need more than minimum effort but here's a trick, what is the common thing in this? Yes, they're all formulae and theorem based which goes to my next point. These chapters are completely based on how much you've understood your basics.

Formulae and theorem cheatsheets

Make a list of all formulae and the theorem used in the book, write them chapter wise and no printouts or digital notes. Take a paper and write it down, no excuses. It helps you while you're practicing, revising and in the last minute review, it helped me damn much. Remember, maths is a sport. The basic formulae must come to you like reflexes.

YouTube is your best friend.

For every single chapter, go and watch the basics and how a sum is done step by step. A recommendation for this is Organic Chemistry Tutor who literally is one of the reasons i passed. He has videos from basic geometry, trigonometry, statistics to calculus. Search for your own YouTubers and be clear with concepts.

Math is fully memorization

Memorize formulae and theorems with the back of your hand, you should be able to recall them within seconds. Be thorough.

Memorize basic math values (if calculator isn't allowed)

Do this if you have a majority of chapters like Statistics, Mensuration, Profit/loss calculation etc, where large numbers are concerned. Memorize the first 10 square, cube, decimal and multiplication values. It may be dry but there are literally songs available for these things, I'm serious, i learnt the first 10 cube roots by listening to Senorita xD Search for rhymes and they'll definitely be many!!

Work it out!!!!!!

Can't stress this enough, atleast 30-40 mins is the minimum for maths. I'm serious, work out each sum, don't ever think it's a waste, you'll see the results. Practice makes perfect. Work out every single sum, from examples to exercise ones cause let's be honest, our examiners love to take problems from every nook and cranny of the book.

Whiteboard method

So, I made this up and it actually works, if you have a whiteboard or anything else, once you completed a chapter, take a random page and whatever sums you have on those two pages, you need to complete within a given time limit. It helps you to identify your weak points and where the hell you're losing both time and effort and not to mention that it gives you confidence boost up.

Hope this helps :))

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cripplecharacters · 5 months

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hello! so, i currently have an oc in the works. i dont have much for his character yet, and hes kind of a blank slate at the moment, however, whilst trying to develop him i had the idea to give him a disability; its something i dont do with my characters very often, and i feel like it could give some depth and realism to his character. however, i..... dont know where to really start with it? i have the vague idea that i think id like him to have crutches, so some sort of leg disability, but just going off that its been hard for me to find any condition that feels quite right. im unsure about making him an amputee either; seemingly the "go to" for anyone who wants to make a physically disabled character. i want to try and represent a disability thats less fetishized by the general public, and looking through this blog here its definitely apparent that a lot of people are tired of seeing basic half amputee characters with overly functional prosthetics; i wanna avoid that. sorry this has gotten a bit rambly, but basically what im asking is,, do you have advice for what i could use as just. a general starting point in this? im terribly uneducated and lost at the moment and id love some help. thank you :]

Hi!

It's great that you're interested in writing a disabled character (with care)! I'm always happy to see more writers/artists/creatives do that.

You mentioned wanting to give him crutches, which is cool! Mobility aid users in media make me happy. However, you mentioned crutches as meaning a leg disability, which isn't always the case — and while I don't have statistics on it, I believe that most crutch users do not use them for leg-only problems, and a lot of them have the not-so-fetishized conditions. Here are some suggestions of what you could give your character, which hopefully gives you some ideas. If you need, you can get back to us with a more specific question after you figure out what exactly your character has! :-) (smile)

Cerebral palsy — probably the most common reason for using crutches in non-elderly people, and the most common (physical) disability in younger people in general. If your character has diplegic (meaning lower limbs affected) CP, he could use crutches and if he has hemiplegic (one arm and one leg affected) CP, then he could use a single crutch or a cane. Cerebral palsy is generally extremely underrepresented when compared to how many people have it IRL! Just be aware that there is a lot of research involved just about the condition itself — multiple types (spastic/ataxic/dyskinetic), different kinds of body involvement, tons of different mobility aids and orthotics to learn about. There is also hereditary spastic paraplegia, which is not the same as CP but similar and progressive.

Spinal cord injury — the general assumption is that all people with spinal cord injuries are fully paralyzed below the neck or waist, and that's not the case. If your character has an incomplete SCI on any level or just a very low level injury, he could be using crutches or switch between a wheelchair and crutches. It's essential to research SCIs to have them be more than “legs don't work, but that's literally it”. SCI can come with severe nerve pain, spasticity, atrophy, and a lot of other things. Worth noting that spinal cord injury could be traumatic, but could also be congenital (spina bifida) or illness related (polio, transverse myelitis, spinal stroke, or cancer, for example). You could think that it's overrepresented in media, but SCI is generally just used as a “default condition” for why a character is in a wheelchair, and a lot of these representations are unfortunately very shallow.

Paralysis — in the monoplegic sense here. Much more rare than the rest of the things here, but your character could have a single paralyzed leg, largely due to nerve damage. Could be traumatic or illness-related (e.g., cancer, infection, or multiple sclerosis).

Stroke (and other traumatic/acquired brain injuries) — stroke can cause a million different symptoms and depending on what happens to your character exactly, he might need crutches! A big portion of stroke survivors deal with hemiplegia and could use a crutch on their non-affected side, for example. Some kinds of stroke might cause your character to have troubles with balance and require a mobility aid to not fall. Of course stroke will also cause other symptoms for your character (it wouldn't be too realistic to only have him have problems with his legs) for example speech issues, headaches, or seizures. Stroke can happen to anyone, and it wouldn't be weird to have a younger character with it. Very common in real life but very rarely represented in fiction.

Limb difference — you can definitely write a character with a limb difference or an amputation without fetishizing it! The main concern with the fetishization is the concept of the robotic limb that works just as well as or even better than a meat leg, and thus the character is “fixed”. But your character could just… not use a prosthetic. A lot of congenital amputees, people with limb differences, or with high level (above knee) amputations might do that. He could also have a leg length difference, which could cause him to need crutches (for example, Morteza Mehrzad has one of his legs significantly shorter after a pelvic injury, and he uses crutches among other mobility aids).

Chronic pain — very broad category for too many specific conditions to count. Neuropathy in the legs and/or lower back could be a reason for using crutches, for example. Unhealed, or poorly healed past injuries. Arthritis in knees or hips. Hypermobility that makes him unsteady or dislocate joints. Pain in bones or muscles where he can't fully weight-bear.

Gait disorders — another broad category (sorry). Your character could have problems with his gait and need aids for that. It could be caused by dyspraxia (I have it), ataxia, progressive muscular dystrophy (there is a lot of different types), Parkinson's disease, or a lot of other things! Could also be injury related.

And of course you could have multiple characters that are disabled to make sure that there is some variety :)

I hope that the above list gave you some ideas for your character :-) (smile) if you have more questions, feel free to send another ask

mod Sasza

#anonymous #mod sasza #mobility aids #crutches #disabled character ideas #writing advice #writing disabled characters

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dandylovesturtles · 4 months

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I come bearing a little Sidelined AU propaganda for the @tmntaucompetition ! Featuring a guest appearance by @intotheelliwoods Poptart and Sprout.

———

“Whooooooaaaaaaa!”

Leo can’t help but echo his brothers’ amazement as they enter the stadium. There are so many turtles here (and others, too!) - so many different versions of themselves, some familiar and others radically different.

It’s ridiculously cool.

“I knew it!” cheers Donnie behind him. “I knew I was right about multiverse theory! Oh, this has so many fascinating implications for physics! You guys know how…”

Leo tunes out Donnie’s ramble (he can’t understand any of it anyway) to focus on the turtles in front of him. It’s easy to pick out the other Leos in the crowd (their color coding seems to be one of the few constants between them), but he’s quickly noticing he’s an outlier in one very big way.

“Hey guys,” he says, interrupting Donnie, “am I the only Leo rockin’ wheelies?”

“Statistically unlikely,” says Donnie, coming to stand next to him. “Given infinite possibilities, there are definitely other worlds where you use a wheelchair, and myself and Raph and Mikey as well.” Donnie pulls down his goggles, scans the crowd, and then says, “But you’re right that you may be the only one in the building.”

“I wonder what the difference is between our timeline and everyone else’s?” asks Mikey.

“I dunno!” Leo’s eyes scan the crowd. “Let’s ask.”

He catches sight of another Leo nearby, this one missing an arm. He also seems to be in the company of a grandpa Leo, and Leo has no idea how to handle the implications of that one so he decides not to think about it too hard.

“Hey!” he calls out, wheeling himself up, careful not to catch anyone’s feet on his way. “Leo! …Oh, that’s so weird.”

The other Leo turns, doing the momentary skip with his eyes when Leo isn’t at the height he was expecting. Leo’s used to that by now. The one-armed Leo retrains his eyes, grinning and holding up a hand in greeting.

“Well there’s a handsome face,” he says.

“Takes one to know one,” replies Leo enthusiastically.

“Oh no, this is going to be the whole competition, isn’t it?” he hears Donnie say behind him. He rolls his chair back into his brother’s shin and takes satisfaction in the yelp he hears after.

“Quick question. Did Draxum and the Foot Clan put together the Dark Armor in your timeline?”

“Huh? Oh!” The other Leo laughs. “Yeah! That feels like forever ago.”

“And he didn’t put you in it?”

“Uh, no.” The other Leo shrugs. “He put himself in it. Is that what happened to, uh…” He gestures vaguely at Leo, who nods.

“Oh yeah. What about you?” Leo eyes his empty shoulder. “Was that from the Shredder?”

“Nope!” The other Leo waves that off. “This was from the Krang!”

“Oh,” says Leo. (Behind him, he hears Mikey whisper, “What’s a Krang?”) “Okay, thanks. We’re just trying to figure out where our timeline went different.” He grins. “Nice compression sleeve, by the way.”

“Thanks!” The other Leo grins back. “Nice wheelchair!”

The other Leo and the big Leo tailing him move on. Leo swivels his chair so he can look back at his brothers.

“Okay, so we know the difference,” he says. “In most other timelines, Draxum is an idiot.”

“He’s an idiot in our timeline,” says Raph, “but I see your point.”

“Cool!” says Mikey. “Mystery solved!”

“Now hold on!” Donnie dashes to stand in front of them, arms held out. “Gentlemen, you can’t really mean to take a single data point and form a conclusion based on that!” He pulls up the screen of his bracer, typing frantically. “We need to gather data from every group here, and then we need to run cross-references to find all the commonalities, and then-“

Leo looks at Raph and Mikey. “Nachos?” he suggests.

“Nachos!” they both cheer.

He starts making his way through the crowd, Mikey and Raph helping him navigate, leaving Donnie to catch up.

“Really!? That’s it!? Don’t you have any interest in the mysteries of the multiverse!? You’re abandoning it for nachos!? …Well okay, but no jalapeños on mine!”

#sidelined au #tmnt au competition #rottmnt #rise leo #2 arms left #dandy fanfiction

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thecreaturecodex · 2 months

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Skelm, Street

Image © Paizo Publishing. Accessed at Archives of Nethys here

[I love the skelms. They might be my favorite Pathfinder monster new to 2e. I've seen the idea of a male equivalent to hags discussed before. Someone on rpg.net, maybe it was @crinosg or @prokopetz, gave their take the name "coots" and used the Old Man of the Mountain from a Betty Boop cartoon as their model. Paizo's brilliant idea was tying their male hag analogue to ideas of toxic masculinity and entitlement. Since I'm someone who loves to use monsters as tools of social commentary, I was basically their target audience here.]

Skelm, Street CR 3 LE Monstrous Humanoid If not for his unnaturally red face and the rack of antlers growing from his brow, this could be an ordinary human. He wears leather armor and carries a cane.

Skelms are creatures of rage and spite, created spontaneously from evil humanoids overwhelmed by anger. All skelms are male, and some sages posit that they are some sort of metaphysical counterpart to hags. Unlike the prolonged ritual to make a hag, a skelm can arise from a totally normal person in a matter of hours—skelms often hold court over potential recruits and transform them through brutal, humiliating hazing. After transformation, a skelm will often return to their previous life, hiding their inhuman features through magical disguises and changing their pursuits to cruelty and exploitation full time.

All skelms have antlers, which are a source of combined pride and shame. Skelms with smaller racks will belittle those with larger ones, although they will claim other reasons for this scorn if pressed. Even more distinctively, skelms deny that they have antlers when dealing with non-skelms, regardless of evidence or argument.

Street skelms are the weakest of the skelms. In their mortal guise, street skelms exploit the respect most people give to the elderly and the wealthy, and they usually appear as one or both of these in order to recruit a mob. Street skelms have little in the way of magical talents, but they are skilled at finding scapegoats to blame for community ills and sic their followers after. Street skelms have even more of a chip on their shoulder than other skelms do, and their egos are especially delicate. Their combat tactics, whether they are in their monstrous forms or not, tend to revolve around doing an immense amount of damage to a single target at a time, preferably a weak or vulnerable one, and then crowing about it for a few rounds before resuming their assault.

Street Skelm CR 3 XP 800 LE Medium monstrous humanoid Init +2; Senses Perception +7, scent

Defense AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 14(+2 Dex, +1 dodge, +2 armor, +2 natural) hp 25 (3d10+9) Fort +5, Ref +6, Will +5; -2 vs. emotion effects DR 3/cold iron

Offense Speed 30 ft. Melee gore +7 (1d6+6 plus trip) or improvised club +7 (1d6+4), gore +2 (1d6+2 plus trip) Ranged rock +5 (1d4+4) Special Attacks belittling rant,improvisational brawler, punishing strike

Statistics Str 18, Dex 15, Con 17, Int 16, Wis 13, Cha 18 Base Atk +3; CMB +7; CMD 19 Feats Catch Off Guard (B), Combat Reflexes, Dodge, Throw Anything (B) Skills Bluff +7,Disguise +7, Intimidate +13, Knowledge (local) +6, Perception +7, Sense Motive +4, Stealth +8; Racial Modifiers +4 Intimidate Languages Aklo, Common SQ change shape (Small or Medium male humanoid, alter self),skelm traits

Ecology Environment urban Organization solitary or gang (1 plus 2-24 humanoids) Treasure standard

Special Abilities Belittling Rant (Su) As a standard action, a street skelm can give a rant that affects all creatures that can hear and understand it within 30 feet. A DC 15 Will save negates the effect. A creature affected by a street skelm is shaken for 1 minute. Anyone shaken in this way takes an additional -2 to damage rolls against the skelm, but gains a +2 morale bonus to damage rolls against other targets. The save DC is Charisma based. Improvisational Brawler (Ex) A street skelm gains Catch Off Guard and Throw Anything as bonus feats. A street skelm treats all improvised ranged weapons as having a 20 foot range increment. Punishing Blow (Ex) As a standard action, a street skelm can exert himself to make a single powerful attack. When he does, he adds an additional damage die of the same type to the attack, and can make a CMB check as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity to push the creature hit 5 feet. After making this attack, the street skelm is treated as being flat footed until the beginning of its next turn. Skelm Traits (Ex) All skelms gain a +4 racial bonus to Intimidate checks, but a -2 penalty to all saving throws against emotion effects.

#skelm #street skelm #monstrous humanoid #pathfinder 1e #pathfinder 2e #hag #social commentary #toxic masculinity

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the-girl-in-the-high-castle · 1 year

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The absurdity and stupidity of all shitflix cancelations lies in one simple question: How many of those canceled shows have you actually heard of before they got canceled?

- Warrior Nun - never heard of it until the moment I started seeing its fans spamming every shitflix post. And that was its second season. It had two seasons, for fucks sake, and most of us have never heard of it. You wanna know whose fault that is? Let me give you a hint. No, it's not the viewing numbers.

- First Kill (or whatever its name is) - Never heard of it until, once again, I saw people complaining about the cancelation under shitflix posts. Once again, guess whose fault that is.

- Santa Clarita Diet - Never heard of it. Didn't even know it was canceled until it made it to the list of pissed of people counting how many of them they axed. Whose fault is that?

- Inside Job - Yeah, never heard of it until it got canceled. Also, canceled after they renewed it. Shitflix: guess we changed our minds.

- Archive 81 - Heard of it when the cancelation was announced.

- The OA - Remember just hearing about it through the fog, even though it came out years ago.

- Sense 8 - know about it only thanks to fans' videos and fanart. I don't remember shitflix ever mentioning it.

- Lockwood & Co - I know about it thanks to fans spamming posts asking for renewal news.

And the list goes on with, I assume, shows I have never heard of.

I've never seen any of these shows, but my open wound is 1899 that I believe got treated the dirtiest of them all.

I have heard of it two years before the premiere, thanks to a 50 seconds long teaser that got me patiently waiting for years because it was my cup of tea. It came from the people who proved themselves before by creating a critically acclaimed show that you can find on a top 10 list of greatest shows of all time. Those people have spent years developing a new filming technique for shitflix. What a way to say thank you.

8 out of 10 people around me have seen 1899. Those people haven't even seen GoT or LotR for fucks sake, the most famous show and movie ever, but they have seen 1899. But not because shitflix promoted it, but because people did.

There was zero promotion, zero cast interviews, zero mentions after the release. It was still watched and talked about by so many people. It has more viewing hours than their hit shows running for 3+ seasons put together. It's a show you can't just binge and forget, you have to actually turn your fucking brain on. It was released in the most busy time of the year, during the damn World Cup and winter holidays. It was still number one for weeks. It was given less than 30 days. They decided to cancel it before it even premiered. They deleted the trailer with 10+ million views from YT.

The same goes with other shows. I have seen zero cast interviews, zero promotion or mentions by their own platform and they still have loyal fan bases that didn't stop talking about them.

But then you have dogshit shows like the Night agent that is getting hyped by shtflix every single fucking day. Fake numbers, pumped up to get people to watch a generic, a hundred times seen before, piece of crap. It got more hype than fucking GoT, and yet I know zero people who have actually watched it. Yep, there is no one I know, in real life or online, that has actually watched this show. So you figure it out.

People who have watched the shows I've mentioned probably have the statistics for them, and have probably seen the viewing hours being blamed for it, which was bullshit.

The latest nail in the coffin was Lockwood & Co. They kept fans waiting for months, and then they announced the cancelation during Eurovision so that fans wouldn't be able to go viral about it because everyone talked about fucking Eurovision.

Shitflix has canceled 26 sci-fi/fantasy shows in the last 3 years. 26! Do you all remember when we couldn't even name 26 shows of all genres put together, let alone watch them?

What all these shows had in common is that they were original and more or less unique and creative, not something you can find at least 6 copies of in either streaming or network TV.

It's like they created all these shows just so they can cancel them, because they are doing their best to actually burn every trace they ever existed.

Shitflix is killing creativity in every form, but in the end, that will be their undoing.

#shitflix #1899 #1899 netflix #warrior nun #first kill #santa clarita diet #inside job #the oa #sense 8 #archive 81 #lockwood and co #fuck you netflix #i hope the writers strike will be their death

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sirfrogsworth · 4 months

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There is this horrible conservative Karen in Utah who is on a school board and she posted a picture of a high school girls basketball team. One of the girls pictured was perceived to be particularly masculine. This Karen assumed they were trying to sneak a trans girl onto the team. She captioned the photo "girls" basketball with transphobic scare quotes.

But the girl was cisgender. And she faced so much bullying and threats to her safety that the school had to hire security for her.

The moral panic about trans girls and women in sports is going to mostly harm cis athletes. Because, as I have pointed out many times, there just aren't very many trans athletes. Missouri passed an anti-trans law for K-12 athletics only to discover it affected a total of 8 people. In the entire roster of 130,000 NCAA women athletes, only 100 are estimated to be trans.

This narrative that there are trans students coming out of the woodwork to infiltrate school sports has caused people to see trans athletes everywhere. They might even be convinced this is now a commonplace occurrence. But if the NCAA is a good statistical model, for every athlete they accuse there is a 0.0769% chance of them actually being transgender.

This idea that these people are going to protect cis athletes from the unfair competition caused by trans athletes is a farce. The majority of the time they are going to embarrass, harm, and possibly threaten the very people they claim they want to protect.

That doesn't seem worth it, even from their hateful point of view.

That is unless their actual agenda is to sow fear and hatred towards trans people and not actually to protect the fairness of competition.

Beyond that, while there have been some initial laboratory studies showing trans athletes who have gone through male puberty do retain some quantifiable physical advantages in a limited number of athletic movements, these advantages have yet to manifest in any statistically significant way in real-life competition.

There have been no world records that have lasted more than a few months. There have been no undefeated trans athletes. There have been no significantly long winning streaks. Every single trans athlete that I could find in my research has been defeated by a cisgender opponent. And I could find very few that even had a positive winning percentage.

In every metric I can think of that would fall under the umbrella of "unfair competition" I have yet to find an example. And if trans athletes truly are so "dominant" I feel like it should be much easier to discover.

The only trend I discovered that might be worthy of discussion is some trans athletes have performed at a higher level for longer. There have been some cyclists who could compete professionally into their 40s, whereas cisgender women typically age out before then. But I could only find a few examples of this and I think much more data would be needed to verify this is common. But I feel this would only be an issue in sports that have an age bracket system.

There are so many other problems within sports that truly need addressing. As of yet, I have not even seen an example of trans athletes being problematic to the fairness of competition. Sometimes they win. Most of the time they lose. And chances are, most cis athletes will never even compete against a trans woman in their entire career.

#transphobia

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blackpilljesus · 4 days

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The rise in popularity of single childfree women should signal that we need to start preparing. I've spoken about this before but want to address a common concern of safety regarding maIe retaliation. At this point some women may think they'll be safer trying to get a maIe but the statistics show otherwise. There's a reason women fought for rights in the first place, we all know that maIes as a collective are horrible beings. If maIes were pleasant to be around & reproduce with, they wouldn't need to force women into it.

Now I dont have all the answers in terms of what to do in the face of maIe retaliation but where to start:

1 - Move in silence. MaIes dont need to know our every move. MaIes have enough power as is, them knowing our strategy on top of that wont help. Hell, play dumb sometimes. This also applies to other women, if they push marriage & kids bs be measured in your response, in the end you know your truth. At the end of the day most of these women are also aware of the danger maIes pose.

2 - Organise. This is tough, extremely tough i can't lie. For one we're scattered all over the world & people in our real lives wouldn't have the committment to this nor believe in deviating from the nuclear structure but it is something needed. Even if it's just online, find or build networks with likeminded women. I say this as a lone wolf but infrastructure & network is needed because the government will make it harder to survive alone so some would need to be able to lean on each other for support even if it's just verbal. Practice separatism as far as you can. Take up learning how to defend yourself. If you're serious about this; be prepared to break the rules at some point because playing nice & by the law wont work. These things are set up by men for men and it wont help us. I'm not saying go out there & purposefuly break the law or put yourself in harms way, just saying prepare. It sounds far out now but the current system cant be counted on, blind eyes are turned when maIes abuse women, women are punished for defending themselves under the system. Even if you dont want to go down the route of community, learn to take care of yourself & hold your own down.

3 - Stop arguing with maIes. This doesnt mean that xys are right, I say this a lot but maIes are fully aware of everything. Arguing with maIes online is a waste of time, time that can go to building for yourself or likeminded women. MaIes denying female oppression is part of the game to keep you wasting your energy on them as opposed to working on yourself. It's to keep you in their hands; doesn't matter whether you're right or not, how many statistics you throw at them, you're still biting their bait.

4 - Stack up on resources & money. If you have resources & money and the priviledge to save then start now. If/when things go downhill it wont be a snap thing but a transition so this window needs to be used to the best of our advantage. Take advantage of the privileges you have now to set yourself for the future because that could very well be gone.

I doubt we'd win tbh but I'd rather die trying than live submitting. I will mention that I know it's scary but we have to think forward. Bear in mind the system has never worked for women, some will say things like "but when women leave maIes get more violent" but there is no safety in the first place. Women are sexually harrassed & assaulted any where at any time with no protection already. Women are constantly told of all the things they should or shouldn't do to avoid maIe violence and it doesnt work anyways, maIes will continue to abuse women & girls. No amount of listening & obeying has helped women because it doesn't matter what the reason for maIe violence is, if they cant find a reason they'll create a reason because their motive is to make women suffer in addition to reproduction & having labour.

Now I know many will speak about the violence of maIe retaliation which I'll address in part 3. This is part 2 of 'the rise in single childfree women' group of posts.

Part 1

#There'll be 4 parts if anyone is wondering.#female separatism #female separatist #6b4t #4b #childfree #single woman #single women

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neurosharky · 6 months

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Personality Disorders count as Disabilities

This post only contains my personal interpretation of official definitions. It may not represent the opinion of everyone who has a personality disorder and may likewise have people agreeing who do not have one.

I will use my own personality disorder as an example in the end, but would like you to know, that the same applies to all other personality disorders, even if I do not name them.

Abbreviations:

DSM-5 = Diagnostic and Statistic Mannual of Mental Disorders 5th Edition

PD/PDs = Personality Disorder/Disorders

ASPD = Antisocial Personality Disorder

In order to make this easier for everyone, I'll provide you with the definitions for a personality disorder and the one for a disability.

According to the DSM-5 a personality disorder is "An enduring pattern of inner experience and behavior that deviates markedly from the expectations of the individual’s culture" marked by at least two of the following: cognition, affectivity, interpersonal functioning and/or impulse control. It further specifies that "the enduring pattern is inflexible and pervasive across a broad range of personal and social situations", "leads to clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning", "is stable and of long duration" and is not better explained by other conditions of mental or physical nature.

The definition for disability will vary depending on ones country, but does have an overall pattern. The US definition from the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) defines it as "a person who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities, a person who has a history or record of such an impairment, or a person who is perceived by others as having such an impairment"

The European Disability Policy (from the official european parliament) says: "Persons with disabilities include those who have long-term physical, mental, intellectual or sensory impairments which in interaction with various barriers may hinder their full and effective participation in society on an equal basis with others".

These disability definitions seem to point towards a longterm impairment in functioning and the management of daily life over a wide variety of contexts.

If it is not clear to you yet how a personality disorder may fit the definition of a disability, let me explain:

A disability has to impair you in a way, that prevents you from interacting with society/life on an equal basis with others. This can look like having difficulties in the social area, not having the same abilities when it comes to working/going to school/university, not being able to do basic activities of daily living on the same level as others, not being able to manage more complex activities of daily living such as finances, insurance, driving and the like on the same level as others, having a difference in reaction/control, having a difference in the ability to perceive reality as the majority does and more. Basically every single way in which your ability deviates from that of the majority of people and impairs you in such a way (whether visibly or invisibly) counts as disabled and the condition that causes it counts as a disability.

Now personality disorders, as mentioned in the definition from the DSM-5 absolutely impair your ability to function in a variety of contexts and very clearly are stated as deviating from that which is expected and common in ones culture. Which is a fancy way of saying "you're different than the majority of people around you". Personality disorders can impair your ability to work/go to school/uni, can impair you in the social area, can impair your ability to do basic and complex activities of daily living and can cause a difference in reaction/control and perceiving of reality.

How a personality disorder impacts a person will be highly individual, but it will inherently impair your ability to function on an equal basis to other people. It will inherently cause personal distress in some way and will be a longterm stable impairment covering a variety of contexts, therefore absolutely fitting the definition of a disability.

Claiming that personality disorders are not a disability is therefore kinda wrong, tho it is up to the individual whether they want to see themselves/ identify as disabled or not. No one will force you to use the word, but the definition of a disability does absolutely include personality disorders.

In some countries you are even able to ask for accommodations to be made and can be declared unfit to work, unfit for military service/jury duty, can be eligible for disability pay/help services and more. This would likely not be the case if PDs would not count as disabilities.

My ASPD is a disability, as it absolutely disables me when it comes to socializing, having relationships, living alone, working/uni/school, doing complex activities of daily living, has an impact on how I perceive reality (tho not caused by it, just influenced), has an impact on my reactions/control/emotional regulation/affectivity etc. I require treatment to teach me skills to lessen the impact of it slightly and give me tools and knowledge on the accommodations I may need. I cannot interact with society/the world on an equal basis to the majority of people who do not have ASPD. I am impaired, I have difficulties, I am disabled.

(first uploaded to my instagram, same username)

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slut4thebroken · 1 year

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Exposure Therapy Prologue

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Jonathan Crane × reader

Summary | You find a new therapist who is more than willing to help you overcome your fears.

Warnings | 18+, talks about fear of being raped, talks about fear of being pregnant and giving birth, pretty much just a content warning for their conversation, the real bad stuff is in pt. 1

Words | 700

Notes | You don’t technically have to read this chapter, it just provides some more background for part 1.

Ao3 link | <3

Fic Masterlist

Main Masterlist

You anxiously sat down on the small couch, picking at your cuticles as you waited.

“Are you nervous?” He asked, giving you a calming smile.

“A little. Sorry, I’ve never done this before.”

“It’s completely normal to be nervous during the first session, especially if you’ve never done anything like this before.” That calmed your nerves a little. “Let’s start simple. Why don’t you tell me why you’re here.”

“Um… The fears that I have are getting a little out of control and affecting my everyday life, so I was hoping you could help me get over them. At least a little bit.”

“Knowing you need help and taking the initiative to seek that help is already a really good start.” You gave him a shy smile at the praise, not sure how to respond. “Since this is a consultation, I’d like to know what fears you need help overcoming so I can figure out the best treatment for you. Is that alright?”

“Yeah, of course. There are two main ones. Um… being- being raped and being pregnant or giving birth.” He scribbled quickly as you spoke and you waited anxiously for him to respond.

“I want to better understand you. Is it alright if I ask some questions?” He asked, crossing his hands and resting them on the notebook in his lap.

“Yes.”

“Is there any past trauma that might’ve caused these fears?” You shook your head. “Let’s just focus on the first one for now. What do you think might be the cause?”

“I guess just knowing how common it is? I feel like I’m living every single day just waiting to become part of the statistic.”

“That must be pretty debilitating feeling that way. Is that stopping you from doing a lot of the things your peers do?” You just nodded in response. “And what about the other one? How is that affecting your everyday life?”

“Um…” You bit your lip as your cheeks grew warm, realizing what you would have to explain to answer his question. “It’s- I don’t…” Looking away from him, you swallowed thickly.

“There’s no need to be embarrassed. I’m here to help you, but you have to help me understand before I can do that.” You nodded in agreement, trying to force yourself to just say it.

“I'm on birth control, but I still don’t feel like I can rely on that completely. And when boyfriends or whatever find out, they usually want to- to…”

“Not use a condom?”

“Yes.”

“But you don’t feel safe doing that?” You shook your head as you bit your bottom lip. “So it’s affecting your relationships. Is it affecting you individually as well?”

“Well I mean, I… want to do that with them too.”

“You have a breeding kink?” You stared at him with wide eyes, floundering for a response. He was unfazed by the inappropriate question though.

“I wasn’t going to say it like that, but yeah.”

“Kinks can often be coping mechanisms. Do you have any other that could be related?”

“…Cnc?”

“Is it easier to partake in that one because there’s no real risk?”

“Yeah I guess so.” This time when he started writing, he took a little longer than the past few times. When he finally looked back up, he gave you a small smile.

“I think I’m going to be able to help you, I already have a few treatments in mind. Thank you for being so open with me, I know it’s not easy talking about something so personal.” You nodded, not sure what to say. “We can start regular therapy but in the meantime I can prescribe you some medication for the anxiety.”

“Oh I don’t- I don’t know if I want to take medication.” He passed the pen over the paper in one stroke, striking something out.

“The old fashion way then.” He smiled and you chuckled awkwardly, wondering if you messed up by saying that. It didn’t seem like you did? Maybe you should just agree since he thinks it’ll help? He cut off your over thinking before you had the chance to say you changed your mind. “Do you think once a week will be a good start?”

“That sounds perfect.”

Part 1

#jonathan crane x reader #jonathan crane #dr crane #scarecrow #tokophobia #fear of being pregnant and giving birth #therapy #exposure therapy

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cirrus-grey · 8 months

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From June 9, 2019 to September 23, 2023 I posted something new to my Ao3 account at least once a week, every week (allowing for some deviation between weekend/weekday posting in the early days). From January 25, 2020, I’ve had an update every single Saturday. In total, this has amounted to 219 weeks of content, 299 individual updates, and 204 unique stories (approximately - I think I miscounted somewhere in there).

4 years, 3 months of weekly posting. 3 years, 8 months of Saturday stories.

I’m very glad I’m taking a break, because finding time to post every Saturday has been getting difficult, but it still feels very weird to not be posting something today.

Anyway, I’m very proud of how much I’ve created over the last few years, so I wanted to do a bit of a statistics breakdown because I’m a sucker for hard data:

Per Ao3 sorting here, I’ve posted… 209 stories. Yeah I definitely miscounted. Anyway.

Fandoms:

203 for The Magnus Archives

2 for Discworld

2 for Good Omens TV

1 for Good Omens Book

1 for Skulduggery Pleasant

1 for Malevolent (which was a TMA crossover lol)

A bunch of other fandoms got dragged into the stats because of Vinettes, but I only added TMA stories to that one in the last 4 years.

Of the 203 TMA stories, 6 are multi-chapter longfics, including Yesterday is Here - which kicked off the Saturday posting, and remains my most popular story to date.

Wordcount:

Approximately 819,000.

Which equals about 530 words written per day.

My average story length was about 3,919 words.

If you take the 6 longfics out of that math, the average drops down to 2,623.

2020 had the highest per-year wordcount, at 236,485.

The highest wordcount for a single story was 57,758 for A Matter of Diplomacy.

The lowest wordcount was only 215 for Best Wishes.

You could fit 268.6 Best Wishes into 1 AMoD.

Random:

40 of the oneshots were posted as direct, week-of reactions to TMA S5 episodes, encompassing 19.14% of the total fics.

30 of the oneshots were for the Castaways series, for 14.35% of the total fics.

The 203 TMA fics are 97.13% of the total.

Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist was in slightly more stories (189) than Martin Blackwood (186), but significantly more stories than the next-most common characters, Tim Stoker (32) and Sasha James (26).

Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist was, unsurprisingly, the most common relationship, at 94.26% of the total (197 fics).

My ten most common tags were, in order: Episode Related (65), Fluff (53), Post-Canon (42), Short (41), Post-Episode: e200 Last Words (39), Location: Somewhere Else (29), Canon Asexual Character (27), Season/Series 01 (22), First Kiss (19), and Happy Ending (14), which says a lot about the type of story I like to write and also that I really like tagging when and where things are set.

Jon was still just ‘Jonathan Sims’ when I started this…

‘Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist’ arrived on the scene in May 2020, so 149 (78.84%) of the Jon stories have the long tag, and 40 (21.16%) have the short.

#im reeling over the ~500 words a day thing #thats... a lot #original post #my writing #writing milestones #...i think im justified adding the tma tags #the magnus archives #my magnus archives stuff #the dinghy #Since June 9 2019 I've updated my ao3 at least once a week (allowing for some deviation between weekend/weekday posting)#week 220 update nadda story nil

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