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weirdmageddon · 8 months

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i love these tags this person is so right

actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?

i wanna get into this actually

(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)

even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie

but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"

im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,

don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity

dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor

(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)

despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him

rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said

and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol

roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"

side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.

i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect

but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?

yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise

so, dave's environment

the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors

his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)

roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok

what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)

rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:

and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear

but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable

there two types of ironies at play here:

seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)

doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)

you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.

"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"

how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1

he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”

dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.

*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift

dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:

if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.

basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"

speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use

oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”

btw dave lalonde would look like this to me

#homestuck #homestuck meta #dave strider #mom lalonde #roxy lalonde #hs #strilonde guardian swap

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strawberry-milkshake-cow · 2 years

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Yuu and friends go to disney world!

Yuu and their twisted friends get a week off school so you decide to take them to disney world for the first time what will happen? Lets find out.

Warnings- none just fluff, may have some typos.

Nonbinary reader

Charecters- all charecters plus staff :)

This will be multiple parts- part 1: before the trip

Whats happening before the trip? How do you get evreyone on board? Where are they sitting on the bus? Find out below

~~~

You get off school for a week but the students dont get to go home yet since the mirrors are being repaired so you decide to take them to disney world after seeing an ad for it it looks just like the one in your world but more tailored to the villans it looked like so much fun! Now to get evreyone on board you set a plan in motion.

Grim

Your feline companion was resting in a patch of sunlight on the ramshackle floors you gently shook him awake "hey grim~ i have an idea" you said happily grim looked at you confused and slightly annoyed that he was woken from his nap. "What do you want henchman?" He yawns as you explain your plan "why should i go" he crossed his arms you smiled you only had one awnser for that "theres lots of yummy food there." With that grim was in and ready to go.

First years-

Ace

You knew ace wouldnt be so easily swayed as grim with a simple mention of food. No instead you would have to work his ego in your favor. And duece was easy enough. You quickly found him and duece arguing as usual "oh boys!" You called out with a grin. They turned to look at you "hey prefect." "Hello!" They said happily greeting you. You sat down and explained your plan. "I dont feel like going all the way over there." Said ace being stubborn as always. you sighed "well i guess it makes sense. You would be to scared for the roller coasters anyways." That got him. He quickly agreeed and challened duece im the provess causeing a two for one combo.

Jack-

Jack was another tough one. You can barely read him at all. So you would need to think very carefully about how to approach this. You found him working out and walked over "hey jack!" All he did was nod in greeting you quickly explained your little trip. He thought for a moment "im not sure im pretty busy i dont have time for a childish thing like that" you thought for a moment "well... what if some creep tries to bother me and grim? I dont have any magic and grim can only use fire i could use a big strong bodygaurd for the day or i may not make it back." You said with a dramatic sigh jack grumbled about it but agreed

Epel

Epel was easy if he put up a fight the same routine with jack would work just as well on him, Even better. He completly agrees with the idea because its away to get vil off his back and it would be his first time there

Sebek

Lets face it hes not going until malleus agrees.

When maus does agree wether you ask him or not hes coming along.

Other nrc students-

Cater

Cater is going the second you tell him. Do you realize how many magicam worthy things he will gain out of this? You fin him taking selfies and walk over and start your routine just as you predicted hes head over heels in love with this idea.

Ruggie

Ruggie doesnt see a problem with this idea so he dosnt mind tagging alog after all like grim just mention all the yummy food and you will be good

Floyd

Another one who is happy with this idea it sounds like so much fun to him and hes in the right mood so i wont take much convincing but he will want to go the moment you mention it so i would save him for last

Ortho

Also apart of the happy gang! He will definitely help you convince ida as well this sounds like a perfect opportunity for idia to make new friends!

Silver

As long as he can sleep he dosnt care where he is his father will definelty drag him along anyways when he hears about this so he agrees

Vice dorm leaders-

Trey

He definetly wants to try out the sweets this place has to offer and learn from them so he will be tagging along happily

Jade

Once he hears it from his brother its all over for any chance of argument floyd is dragging him alog wether he likes it of not besides it will certainly be interesting.

Jamil

Once you tell kalim like jade its all over for argument he has no choice but to tag along.

Rook

He is so excited for this its kinda creepy. He will gush about how amazing this will be that whole time until you get there.

Lilia

He is definetly going now that you told nothing will stop him from coming and bringing the whole disamnoa family hes in summer father mode and ready to go

Housewardens-

Riddle

It will take some convinceing after all his mother would never let him go to a normal park much less and amusement park but you explain all the yummy strawberry sweets and that you need someone to keep evreyone in line then hes in

Leona

Probably really lazy about it so it will be hard to convince him to come you will need to threaten his peace saying you will wake him up from evrey nap he ever takes if he doant agree. Trust me then he will.

Azul

This man will somehow tirn this in to a buissness opportunity i have no clue how but he will. So hes in and will make profit off of this trip.

Kalim

Oh hes so ready this sounds like the best thing in the world to him he eill be dragging jamil around aswell

Vil

Probably the hardest to convince after all he is so busy but he realuzed he had a role in a dusney productions movie coming up maybe he could learn some things about his charecter while he is there plus epel and rook are so excited he will make sure everyone looks their best

Idia

Very hard to convince him to go but ortho is definetly a big help so with enough peer pressure he finnally agrees so you leave him alone.

Mallus

Litterlly on cloud nine to be invited anywhere. Hes coming no taking it back now.

Staff-

Crowley

Once he overheards the idea from someone he comes up and graciously offers to chaporone this even in one of the schools old busses they rarely use anymore he also tells the other staff ti come

Crewl

Told by crowly he has to make sure his pups stay in line after all.

Trein + lucius

Hes bringing the cat. He will turn yhis into a history lesson aswell.

Vargas

Hes making sure you all exercise while your there

Sam

Hes more than happy to go he may even find new products for the store

Rsa students :) -

(You decide to call a few of your rsa friends and see if they want to come with!)

Neige

Hes very happy to join plus he gets to keep an eye on you hes a protective friend especially when your in a school full of villans you need someone to watch out for you!

Chenya

He heard riddle and trey were going so hes sure to follow! Besides it it sounds like a purr fect way to spent the after mew n

Najma viper

(Does she go to rsa i cant remember... oh well) shes happy to go shes your only female friend after all! Besides her brother will be there to for some sibling bonding

Cheka

Leona was forced on babysitting duty again so hes coming along super excited

Bonus! their roles on the trip

Crewel- the driver no one else can be tristed driving or there will be a crash.

Riddle- is enforcing the rules. Making sure evreyone stays in line

Cater is taking a million photos of the trip

Trey is making sure evreyone is making logical desisions hes the smart ine and can fix most problems

Yuu- you are the you need to make sure evreyone is getting along and no overblots

Ace and duece and making sure evreything stays lively ace keeps trying to pull pranks but duece is keeping him in line

Lilias in dad node making sure everyone is happy and having fun or else

Trein is trying to lecture history of disney world

Crowly is reading a book being useless

Sam is talking with azul about buissness

Grim is taking a nap with treins cat

Najma is helping you keep things calm

Silver is sleeping

Jade and floyd are being scary

Kalim is bothering idia withe ortho and jamil watch

Sebek is being sebek hanging around malleus

Rook is helping with epel while neige chats with vil

Chenya is just being a menace

Cheka is being a little kid and chating with jack and ruggie while leona sleeps

Pt 2 will be about your living situation fir the week bye bye

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #fanfic #disney #riddle rosehearts x reader #twst leona #x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #kalim al asim x reader #vil schoenheit x reader #idia shroud x reader #malleus x reader

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theoriginaltortuga · 8 months

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Responsibility, Rage, and Recent Resurrection (Part 3)

A/N: I am working my hardest to have this complete before the semester starts, if there are more typos or some parts are wonky, please allow

Pairing: Connor x ilitw MC (Devon Hernandez)

Tagging (by request): @gutsfics

Wordcount: 2,045

Connor winced as Devon fell back onto the mattress. For the fifth time. By now, he could stand on his own, it was taking a step that wasn’t going well.

Devon’s face was blotchy and his hair was drenched with sweat as he turned into the mattress to screech. “I hate this so fucking much!”

“I know, sweetheart.” Connor sat on the edge of the bed and rested a hand on his back. Devon shouldn’t be this exhausted from standing and trying to move. Probably. Connor wasn’t entirely sure. He was drawing on that time he had broken his leg as a kid and everything Andy had said on the rare occasions Connor drove him to and from physiotherapy.

Andy or Jocelyn would know better. Then again, they’d both call him a moron for sticking Devon in a car and driving him seven hours away from anyone else who might be able to help. When he thought about it like that it sounded bad.

“Hey.” Devon’s voice brought him out of his thoughts. He had sat up and was smiling softly. “Don’t be all frowny. I’ve only been awake for a day. It’ll take a while for everything to go back to normal.” He didn’t seem to believe his own words.

Connor scrubbed at his face. Devon needed him to be strong and steady, not having his mind yo-yoing on his decisions every five seconds. “Yeah, you’re right.”

They’d only left Westchester yesterday and he already felt like things were falling apart. Devon couldn’t walk, only ate because Connor made him, and was legally dead. They needed help, but the only people who could, were more likely to take Devon away from him and right back into danger and the Power.

The only reason he’d done all of this was to protect Devon, but what if Devon didn’t want to be protected? What if they did go back and Devon chose to stay? Not just in Westchester but with the Power. Connor was done with that life, so if Devon wasn’t, what did that mean for them?

“Ready to watch me fall on my ass again?” Devon said cheerfully as he tried to push himself to his feet.

Connor stood front of him to let Devon balance himself on Connor’s shoulders. Devon beamed down at him even with exhaustion in his eyes. That smile still made Connor feel off balance. Holding Devon in his arms was something he’d dreamed about for years only to be left heartbroken when the sun came up. He wondered if Devon would always feel like a dream.

“Connor? If I take a step I’m gonna walk into you.”

He smiled up at him. “Maybe you should. I think it’s a good time for a break anyway.”

Devon raised an eyebrow. “It’s been less than an hour.”

“Exactly.”

He laughed and leaned into Connor, letting them sway for a moment before Devon pulled back. He kept his eyes on Connor’s chest, something he’d been doing a lot, looking and touching over Connor’s heart. Maybe it was comforting? “There was something I wanted to ask you.” He took a deep breath. “You mentioned a ritual–”

Connor stepped back and Devon windmilled, trying to keep his balance. Connor should care about that, should try and help, but instead he moved until his back was pressed against the door.

“What the hell?” Devon had balanced, but his legs were trembling. He’d fall if he didn’t sit, but by the scowl on his face it didn’t seem like he was going to.

“You don’t need to know.”

“The fuck I don’t! Especially if it makes you act like this.”

“Why do you want to know? You want to leave me and run back to what I’m trying to protect us from?” Connor couldn’t believe Devon would turn his back on him like this. Right when they finally had a shot at a future together. “Am I not good enough for you?”

“What?” The scowl melted away in favor of confusion. “Of course I’m not going to leave you! Connor, I love you. I want to be with you no matter what, but you can’t kidnap me to San Francisco and expect me not to ask questions.”

Connor ran a hand through his hair, pulling at it. It was good to hear how Devon felt, but he’d only gotten involved the first–second?--time because of his friends. If he knew exactly what they were facing, they would take priority. He loved Devon’s loyalty and desire to help his friends but it was very counterproductive at the moment.

“Connor, please. Don’t you trust me?”

He knew when he was being played, but there was an inkling of real doubt in Devon’s voice. “Fine.” Connor sat on the edge of the bed and waited for Devon to do the same. “The guy that killed my mom, Adrian Kim, did it because of a ritual for power…” Connor explained the whole story slowly, examining Devon’s expression for any reason to stop, but there was none. Devon’s face was perfectly blank right through the end.

They sat in silence. The wall clock ticked and the sounds of other motel guests starting their days filtered into the room.

“Do you get it? Leaving was the only way I could protect you.”

Devon didn’t meet his eyes. His head was bowed, his hair a curtain between them. Blood rushed behind Connor’s ears. Devon had to understand. They needed to be on the same page.

“I’ve never really been the one protected before.” He looked up with a watery smile. “I mean, it’s not like anyone asked me to, but I’ve always been the protector. It’s nice to be on the other side of it. Thank you.”

Connor didn’t know if he believed him. It seemed too easy. “I’m happy to protect you for the rest of our lives. Nothing in Westchester is our problem anymore.”

“Except the funerals.”

Connor froze. “What?”

“Only if they die.” Devon sat closer and leaned against him. “Our friends are strong and there’s even better odds with everyone you mentioned, but you know, if. Then that would be our problem.”

“If. That won't happen. Everyone will be fine.”

"That's what I thought before I died." Connor caught Devon as he slumped against him, unconscious again. Why did it feel like that had been on purpose?

---

Devon waited until they heard Connor’s boots hitting the motel stairs and then dove for the duffle bag. Connor had kept looking at it every few minutes, so the phone had to be there. Unless it wasn’t and they had to move to plan D.

Early that morning, he had listened with panic growing in his chest as Connor told him about the evil ritual that was happening at a fucking carnival because their lives weren’t enough of a horror movie, apparently. It was beyond tempting to just roll with what Connor said about running and protecting and forgetting that Westchester even existed, but Devon was self-aware enough to know that the right thing to do, usually wasn’t what he wanted to do, which was why he had to do it anyway.

Also, Connor acting like a jackass and nearly letting them eat shit because Devon asked a question he didn't like was probably a bad sign.

They found the phone shut down at the bottom of the bag and turned it on. Way too many missed call notifications and–a passcode. Of course there was a passcode. Could nothing in their life be easy?

It was fine. Just a slight complication. IPhones gave you six chances before you were shut out. So six digits and six tries. It was fine.

091298, Connor’s birthday. Incorrect.

020500, Stacy’s birthday. Incorrect.

123456. Incorrect and honestly they weren’t sure why they’d even tried it.

266667, Connor in digit form. Incorrect.

Two more tries. It was hopeless. He didn’t know enough about Connor or his life to guess at his password. Devon was going to try the next two, fail horribly, Connor would notice and freak out, and they would end up even further from Westchester—Wait.

Further from Westchester. In the car. Connor’s car. The car that was specifically a C-A-M-A-R-O.

There was no way.

226276, Camaro in digit form. Correct.

He was in.

Devon laughed helplessly. He was maybe-dating a fucking dork.

All of Devon’s friends were in the contacts and recent missed calls, along with names that were familiar but unrecognizable. Really though, there was only one person they could call.

The phone didn’t even get a chance to ring before– “Connor Benjamin Green, if you’re not dead, I’m gonna make you wish you were!” Stacy shrieked down the line.

Devon yanked the phone away from his ear and put it on speaker. “His middle name is Benjamin?”

Stacy went quiet. The clock ticked on and Devon watched the door, trying to hold back a smile.

“...Devon?”

“Speaking,” He said with a wide grin.

“Oh my god. I-It’s been–” She laughed and it sounded teary. “Wait, where’s Connor?”

“At the store. Hotel shampoo wasn’t really cutting it. Mostly I just needed time to call you.”

He could hear her take a deep breath, all business once more. “Right. Is he okay?”

“For a given definition. Nothing bleeding or broken, but he is acting seriously strange. Aggressive and pushy about little things."

“Yeah, we have might have an idea about that. Before you guys disappeared, he was acting the same. I just thought it was…other stuff. What about you? Are you okay?”

“For a given definition.”

“Devon.”

“Traumatized as fuck, I can barely walk, chewing is a task made in hell, and I keep fainting every few minutes, but that’s kind of on purpose.”

“What?”

“So! If it’s not ‘other stuff’ then why did Connor kidnap me in the dead of night?”

“Don’t think I didn’t hear that. The people Connor’s been working with have been dealing with these things called Horrors. People who have been infected by corrupted Power through water and are turning into hulking rage monsters with gray skin and glowing blue eyes.”

“Don’t forget claws, fangs, and a taste for human flesh.” Ava cut in. “Good to hear your voice, Devon.”

“Better to hear yours.” He wished he could sit and talk to them forever. It was weird to think that he actually could when this was all over. “Is it like when Jane possessed people?”

“Not exactly. I wasn’t kidding about the taste for human flesh, but the bigger worry is the homicidal tendencies, a non-negotiable symptom as far as we know.”

“Is there a cure?” Despite his efforts, the roots of the weeds didn’t seem to be going anywhere. The best they’d done was cut them down to half of their original size, but who knew how long that would last.

“Lucas and my coven are working on it. Nothing final yet, but soon. For Connor, we might not need it.” Ava sounded distant as she called out, “Power kid!”

The voices went too quiet and then–”Hello?” A deep, raspy, monotone voice that was vaguely familiar.

“Power kid, I presume.”

“Vesper, actually. I cleansed the spots that had the worst of the corruption and it worked. I haven’t tried to cleanse a person, but it shouldn't be that different. I just need to get close enough without dying, only thing, I’m not sure how well my Power will work outside of Westchester.”

“Our best bet,” Stacy said, “is to get Connor back to Westchester and heal him here. It’d be easier if he’d just come back himself, but we’re running out of time. How far are you guys?”

Right. Time to get back to reality. San Francisco. That was all he had to say and they could figure out the rest from there. “Actually, I’ve been healing him, or trying to.” Why did he say that?

“Is it working?” Vesper asked.

No, not really. “Yes, definitely. I can probably get him back to Westchester by tomorrow.” Why did he say that?

Ava sounded unsure. “I don’t know. There isn’t exactly a good way to tell when someone’s about to snap. It might already be too late.”

Devon was a lying liar who lied and had also been on the phone for a good 40 minutes. “It’s not too late. I need to put the phone back, but I promise I’ll see you guys tomorrow by 11:59.”

Stacy tried to say something else, but Devon hung up and replaced the phone without a trace of evidence. They climbed back into bed just as Connor’s boots hit the stairs again.

What the hell had they just done?

#oc: devon hernandez #it lives within #ilw #connor green #turtle writes

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macestro · 8 months

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#𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐎: a private, selective and independent roleplay blog for A that's briefly mentioned in death note: another note. however, my interpretation of A is largely canon-divergent and headcanon-based! in that vein, i will be following the events of the 2015 live action drama adaptation in this portrayal. please keep this in mind while interacting with me.

this blog is affiliated with the following blogs: @hitoseigi, @divadied, @hisgame & @vanvyd.

all blog graphics have been made exclusively for me by @hisgame, aside from my psd & this pinned, which has been made by @isaworks and @hitoseigi, respectively!

my name is solar, they/them, and i'm 25+. this will mostly be a blog for friends since my energy levels are consistently low and i'm a caretaker for my disabled mom. in addition to that, i also suffer with adhd, major depressive disorder, and general anxiety disorder and have chronic fatigue. i also have plenty of other blogs to run, too.

as far as my dni criteria goes, it's the usual: no racism, lgbtq+phobia, ace erasure, etc. i will also make it abundantly clear that i, in no way, will tolerate proshipping in any form, so if you do support this, then please do me the favor and kindly hardblock me. i do not want to hear your justification as to why proshipping should be allowed on this platform.

i must ask for my own comfort, however, if you would like to follow me, please be mindful and tag for the following: adultery/cheating/infidelity, domestic abuse, gaslighting, sexual harassment and alcohol abuse/alcoholism (i am completely fine with casual drinks in threads. this is mostly stemming from angry drunks!) thank you for keeping these in mind when we're interacting — it does mean a lot!

please do not use me as a meme/aesthetic resource, do not like every post i make, etc. shipping requires both chemistry and effort as i do not want to be the one solely expressing interest in continuing said ship. if no interest is expressed within a couple of months, i will consider the ship to be dropped. it's unlikely that shipping will happen given the nature of A's character, but just wanna note this as a general rule.

also, please do not drag me into drama. i don't care for it. i don't have time for it. i don't have spoons for it. lastly, please don't use my tumblr ims or discord dms as your personal venting space. i'd prefer to be asked beforehand if it's alright to vent to me because my spoons are always low.

another thing that i would like to emphasize is if you interact with or condone the actions of the following, then please, hardblock me as well: aku, damon / omen / rxgelord (eyesofbluebitch/burnyoubastard), hearty, zero / kign typo, myers, loke / neku, second callout here, star / usa, miles, shannon / pink. this list will be periodically updated should further callouts emerge.

#ooc -- pinned.

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nanowrimo · 3 years

Text

5 Tips for Fast Drafting from a New York Times Bestselling Author

NaNoWriMo is basically an exercise in fast drafting: getting as much of the first draft of the story as you can on the page as quickly as possible. Today, bestselling author J. Elle is here to share some pro tips for fast drafting: My first middle grade novel took me nine days to write.

The first draft was about 40,000 words or so. And yes, it needed to be revised before it sold to a publisher. But the meat of the story was on the page in just over a week’s time. I’d never drafted anything quite that fast before. Within a single month I’d written an entire novel, revised it a couple times and readied it for sale. A few months later that novel sold at auction and will be on shelves May 2022.

I still look back on this feat with a bit of shock and awe. To date I’ve sold five novels to major publishers, two young adult, two middle grade and one non fiction and my experience fast drafting has forever altered the way I approach writing. I should mention, fast drafting isn’t for everyone. Writing is such a personal thing and each storyteller has their own process, but in the event getting the first draft out is the biggest hurdle for you, like it is for me, I’m going to share five tips for knocking out that first draft in record time.

1. Start with a SHORT story pitch.

Pitching a story in a few words is tough. But it’s a worthy effort and the best use of your time before you get any words on the page. Why? Because it helps you hone in on the core of your story and its hook. A good short pitch involves the character, their dilemma, and a hint of the stakes. In October of 2018 I pitched my YA debut novel in a tweet which then blew up. Not many words can fit in a tweet, but by choosing the right set of words, I was able to convey the heart of my story and it really resonated. (From that tweet, I signed with a literary agent and sold my debut novel to a Big 5 publisher in a six-figure-deal.) The biggest favor you can do for yourself is understand the story—its essence, its core—you’re trying to tell before you start drafting. And that’s hard. But the more you play around with creating a short pitch, you’ll begin to see a clear snapshot of what your book is going to be about. That’s your jumping off point.

2. Expand your pitch into tent pole beats.

From your short pitch, spend some time deciding on what your major beats are. Now, yes this is a bit like outlining. And for you pantsers out there, I empathize with you. I was a pantser and still am in many ways. But I still do this step because this step ultimately saves me time. The beauty of fast drafting is that you know what you need to do when you sit down to type. So a lot of these steps are about doing pre-work so that when you sit down to type you’re not spinning your wheels to figure out what to type. Instead you’ll have a clear goal and you’ll be ready to execute it. Also, note that the goal isn’t to perfect each of these steps, but instead to try to do each step, to the best of your ability, and in a way that makes sense.

I could write an entire piece on beat sheeting novels (which I love and do for all my books), but for the purposes here, I’ve organized the main things you want to know below in a series of questions. Simply answer each, make a chart if you like that sort of thing, and once you have each question filled out in a way that logically makes sense, move on to the next step. (NOTE: It’s a good idea to get feedback on this step if you have critique partners and fellow writers you trust.)

Opening Scene - Who is the character before the world changes?

Inciting Incident - What happens that forces them to make a choice, changing their lives forever? What are they choosing between?

“A” Plot - What is that choice they make? What are they pursuing or working toward? Finding information? Going on a quest? Uncovering the truth behind a murder?

Stakes - What are the stakes of the “A” plot? What’s at risk if they fail to accomplish whatever they’re pursuing? It should be something that personally affects them or someone / something they care about.

“B” Plot / Character - Who or what is the theme of the story? What character in your story is going to embody that theme and play a key role in helping the main character change?

Midpoint - what happens in the middle of the book to change the character’s direction. Usually it’s some bit of new information or they realize things are not as they seem.

Stakes Raise - How do the stakes (what’s at risk if they fail) raise after the middle of the book?

Character Arc - what does your character believe about the world in the beginning of the book that by the book’s end they will no longer believe? (An extension of this question is: what things can happen in this character’s life to facilitate them incrementally learning this big truth? If you don’t know this question right off, that’s okay. But this is a question you want to go back to every now and again, even after you finish the first draft, to ensure your character is actively involved in a plot that is resulting in their change.)

Failure - How will your character fail big? This happens at about the 75% point of the book and it's the final moment of failure, usually, before they pick themselves up off the ground (figuratively or literally) and learn the lesson they’ve needed to learn. There forward they act on their new belief to the end of the book, demonstrating how they’re changed.

If you’d like a more in depth look at how to beat sheet a novel, I strongly suggest reading Jessica Brody’s Save The Cat Writes A Novel.

3. Flesh out your beats into a detailed synopsis.

Now the fun part! This step is the most helpful thing you can do to enable yourself to fast draft.

Write a mini version of your story, also known as a detailed synopsis. The key to writing synopses is not to worry about the voice, but instead what happens. Try to convey what happens and its impact on the character to show how the story moves from tent pole moment to tent pole moment (per the step above). This takes some trial and error and you may get annoyed with yourself because it’s not as easy as it seems. But, I’ve seen that if you can write a compelling and cohesive synopsis, the draft that you execute will be far stronger and more efficiently executed.

Definitely get beta feedback on your synopsis from writing friends you trust. It’s worth going over this a few times to get it right. In terms of length, aim for 3-4 pages for a middle grade novel and 5-10 pages for a young adult or adult novel. These are just general guidelines. My latest YA novel required a fifteen page synopsis and I am very glad I did it because it conveys the tone, arc, and plot of the novel and the main plot threads quite well, which allowed me to draft the first 23,000 words of the story in five days.

4. Summarize each scene.

(Note: a chapter can have more than one scene.)

Okay, we’re getting really close to writing! Now that you have a mini version of your story, consider how you will break it up into scenes. This doesn't need to be perfect, but spend some time figuring how to stretch your synopsis into a full novel. Give each scene a short summary. Aim for a few sentences, no more than a paragraph, just so you know what needs to happen in that scene (or scenes). Do not skip this step. I repeat, do not skip this step. This step allows you to sit down and execute the scene without figuring out what to write. The “figuring out” part is where a lot of writers slow down. Do that in the summaries so when it’s time to draft you are ready to execute, not sort out details.

5. Write with a goal in mind.

Plan your writing days. I’m not talking anything extensive here. Just grab your phone calendar or a post-it note and write down which days you want to do which scenes. Then on writing day re-read that summary and execute it. If you’ve done all the pre-work the words will fly from your fingers. Don’t worry about grammar, typos, reading back what you did. Insert fillers such as, “TITLE” or “NAME” for details you haven’t worked out yet. Just get the scene that you’ve summarized out. The goal is to finish the draft. After that is when you make sure it all works together through revisions and fill in the details. Right now the goal is finishing the draft. It literally just needs to exist!

If you’ve done all five steps, pat yourself on the back because congrats, you’re ready to fast draft! Don’t hesitate to tag me on socials if you try this method out and it works for you. I’d love to hear how it goes!

J.Elle is the New York Times bestselling author of Wings of Ebony. Elle has a Bachelor’s of journalism and an MA in educational administration and human development. She grew up in Texas, but has lived all over, from coast to coast which she credits as inspiration for her writing. These days the former educator can be found mentoring aspiring authors, binging reality TV, loving on her three littles, or cooking up something true to her Louisiana roots.

Website: WingsOfEbony.com

Twitter: @AuthorJ_Elle

Instagram: @AuthorJ.Elle

TikTok: @authorjelle

#nanowrimo #writing #amwriting #writing advice #first draft #nano prep #camp nanowrimo #by nano guest #j. elle

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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 301: All My Todorokis

Previously on BnHA: We learned that when a bunch of superpowered villains are suddenly set loose with nobody around to stop them, things get fucked pretty quickly. Old Man Samurai and a bunch of other useless people decided to make “I pretend I do not see it” their new mantra, and resigned. Endeavor had a moment of despair on account of being crushed by the guilt of having ruined the lives of himself, his family, and basically everyone else in the entire world. For various reasons the heretical notion of “person who has done bad things feels sorry for doing them” sent fandom spiraling into a meltdown, so that was fun. The chapter ended with the entire Todoroki clan descending upon Enji’s hospital room to have a dramatic chat about Touya and All That General Fuckery.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “here’s the story of how Baby Touya slowly went insane trying to win his father’s love.” It’s a tale full of subverted expectations and heartbreaking inevitability, and also like twenty panels of the cutest fucking kids who ever existed on planet earth, who are so fucking cute that I can’t stop thinking about their cuteness even with all of the horrifying family tragedy unfolding around them. It is absolutely ridiculous how cute they are. Touya is out here pushing his tiny body past its limits because he inherited the same obsession as his dad and neither of them can put it aside even though it’s destroying them, and yet all I can think about is Baby Shouto’s (。･o･｡) face. Anyways what a chapter.

so I have to confess that even though I managed to avoid being caught off-guard by the early leaks, the number of people reblogging my Endeavor posts from earlier this week and using the tag “bnha 301” kind of gave me an inkling that this chapter will include more Tododrama lol. that said, I don’t know anything else about it, so we’re still good spoiler-wise

AHHHHH FLAHSBAKC AHHHH. omg I know I typoed the shit out of that, but I’m just going to leave it lol I think it’s fitting

holy shit holy fuck. so this is Rei and Enji’s first meeting, then??

yepppp, oh shit

so wait, I know this is not even the slightest bit important, but are they meeting at Enji’s home or Rei’s? because I always figured that Enji was the one with the super-Japanese aesthetic, but maybe that was Rei’s side of the family all along

(ETA: from what I found during my very brief google search, omiai meetings are often held at fancy hotels or restaurants, so maybe that’s what this is.)

there’s such a period drama feel to this setting. like it’s so outrageously formal fff how can anyone stand this kind of atmosphere though seriously

OH THANK GOD

I mean they’re still stiff af but at least they’re not rigidly sitting in seiza and staring at each other unblinkingly anymore lol. Enji’s actually got his hands in his pockets now. why is this somehow almost cute

oh damn it’s the flowers

Rei seems so subdued and it’s so hard to get any idea of what she’s actually thinking. I want to see her side of this dammit

but anyway, so at least from Enji’s perspective it seems like even though the marriage was arranged and he picked her because of her quirk, he still loved his wife and wanted to do right by her. the fact that he was watching her and noticed that she liked the flowers, and remembered that detail for all these years -- there’s a reason why Horikoshi’s showing us this. we know what’s going to happen later on; we know how much fear and violence and breaking of trust is coming up ahead, and while it may seem like this scene is serving to soften Enji’s character further -- which to be fair it is -- it also helps drive home the full impact of his abuse. that it’s so terrible not only because of the trauma of the abuse itself, but also because of the way it retroactively destroys all of the good things as well. this could have potentially been such a sweet scene, but it’s inescapably tainted by the knowledge of what’s to come, at least for me. and that’s just brutal

anyways, shit. is the whole chapter going to be like this?? feel free to toss in something I can actually make a joke about sometime, Horikoshi

oop, back to the present

omfg lol

“are you all right” “NO I’M NOT ALL RIGHT WHAT THE FUCK.” “oh, right, because of all the stuff that’s happened with me abusing you and you having a mental breakdown and being hospitalized for ten years and then our son coming back to life and killing thirty people, right, right. I almost forgot.” whoops

omfg you guys I’m loving this new and improved steely-eyed Rei. I’m loving her a lot

and what do you mean “part one” fkjds how long is this going to be. TOO MUCH DRAMA FOR ONE CHAPTER TO HANDLE

oh, hello

yeah I’ll say you did. didn’t seem to bother you much at the time, though

HMMMMMMMMMMMM

Dabi Is A Noumu intensifies even further. anyways though would you fucking look at this boy lounging on this moth-eaten couch doing his best DRAW ME LIKE YOUR FRENCH GIRLS impression wtf

Dabi what if you actually had killed him??? what would you feel?? satisfaction?? regret?? anything at all?? tell me your secrets goddammit

who are you talking to buddy

Fuyumi-chan, Natsu-kun (is it common for brothers to address each other as -kun?? can’t recall seeing that in many other anime, but hey), and “dot dot dot,,,,,, SHOUTO” lol thank you so much for this bountiful heaping of Tododrama Horikoshi we are blessed

AH, WHAT DID I SAY THE OTHER DAY

ULTIMATE MELODRAMATIC THEATER CHILD. “I’M JUST GOING TO LIE ON THIS COUCH SHIRTLESS AND ALONE AND MAKE SPEECHES TO MY FAMILY MEMBERS WHO AREN’T THERE AND SAY THINGS LIKE ‘WATCH ME IN THE PITS OF HELL’ WITH A STRAIGHT FACE BECAUSE NO ONE’S THERE TO JUDGE ME.” WELL JOKE’S ON YOU MISTER CHATTERBOX BECAUSE I AM IN FACT JUDGING THE SHIT OUT OF YOU LOL

(ETA: and on a more serious note, it’s interesting to see that “look at me”/”watch me” theme being used again though, because we see that same sentiment uttered repeatedly by the younger Touya in the flashback. well kid, you definitely got your wish at last. don’t know what else to say.)

OKAY HORIKOSHI HAS DECIDED THAT’S ENOUGH FUN, TIME FOR MORE FLASHBACKS

oh my sweet precious lord

just as cute as we left him. giving us a child this cute when we all know full well what’s going to happen to him is just unspeakably cruel though

HOMG

I’m fucking speechless. you broke me, congratulations. what am I even supposed to do with this

I can’t get over this. moving forward my life will be split into two distinct parts, B.P. (Before the Pout) and A.P. (After the Pout)

and meanwhile there’s ALL THIS BACKGROUND ANGST BUILDING UP, AND I CAN’T EVEN FOCUS ON IT. Touya’s arm and cheek are covered in bandages (I’m guessing this is shortly after that “ouch!” panel we got some chapters back), and Enji is deliberately avoiding training with him because he doesn’t want him to hurt himself further. I can’t fucking get over the irony that all this time everyone thought Touya had died because Enji pushed him too far in his training, and it turns out that it’s the opposite -- the tragedy ultimately happened because he didn’t want to push him. but I’m jumping ahead of myself though I guess

by the way,

remember this?? just wanted to remind you that it exists just in case you forgot

so now someone is talking and basically saying that Touya is the exact opposite of what Enji was hoping for when he decided to start playing with quirk genetics

-- okay hold up

...lol no, never mind. for a second I thought “holy shit he looks kind of familiar WHAT IF IT’S UJIKO OMG” before I remembered that Enji would have recognized him during the hospital capture mission if that was the case. so NEVER MIND, PROCEED

IMAGINE THAT, ENJI DOESN’T QUITE SEEM SATISFIED WITH THIS SUGGESTION OF QUITTING NOW

(ETA: how the fuck did this man go around saving 62 towns in a single day what even is All Might.)

[clicks tongue several times] trouble a’brewin’

MEANWHILE BABY TOUYA HAS UNFORTUNATELY INHERITED HIS DAD’S STUBBORN STREAK

KLDIHWOEIJFL:KSDJ

!!!!!!!!!!!

oh my god. oh my god. what is this chapter. WHAT IS IT

so now Touya is all “YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND MY MANLY DESIRE TO BURN MYSELF ALIVE” well you got her there champ

THEY’RE TOO CUTE. OH MY GOD. HIS FURIOUS LITTLE TEARS. HER CHUBBY LIL FACE. HIS STUBBY LIL FISTS. SOMEONE HELP ME

also are they just home alone lol or what. “hey Touya, you’re what, like six now?? do us a favor and look after your baby sister for a couple hours for us would you? make sure not to set yourself on fire or anything.” WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG!!

now it’s nighttime and Enji and Rei are arguing, presumably about his decision not to train Touya anymore

whew. okay. so, a couple of things here

1. first of all I think this conclusively shows that Enji really was trying to do the best he could for Touya. he stopped training him as soon as he realized it was hurting him, but Touya was still determined so he tried to make it work anyway, and even visited doctors to try and figure out if there was anything they could do. then, once they were absolutely sure that it wasn’t going to work, he tried multiple times to explain to Touya why they had to stop. he didn’t just abandon him out of the blue, which is really important to note. “no matter how much I tried telling him...”

so yeah, that debunks another common fandom accusation. so by the time he finally makes this decision, which we all know is going to turn out horribly, it’s basically because he’s already tried everything else he could think of. which, by the way, still doesn’t mean he handled this right. but at the very least he was taking Touya’s feelings into account and he was trying, and he didn’t just abruptly toss his son aside (at least not yet)

2. buuuut, then there’s this panel right below all that

which is the other side of it. if he’d just quit like the doctor person advised him to, that would have been the end of it. Touya would still have been upset, but he would have eventually gotten over it and the family would have moved on and possibly even been happy. but what happens next happens because Enji can’t let go. he still has this maddening urge to surpass All Might, and so he and Rei keep having more children, and then Shouto is born, and Enji finally has a kid he can start projecting all of his hysterical ambitions onto once again, and everything starts spiraling out of control soon after

though p.s. none of that is Shouto’s fault though!! he’s one of the few good things to come out of this whole mess and I’m very happy that he exists. the tragedy is that his dad fucking lost his mind over his quirk and fucked everything up. but that’s on him, not Touya or Shouto

anyways, SLKFJLSHGLKJL

I CAN’T FUCKING TAKE THIS YOU GUYS??? LOOK AT THAT LIL BUTTON OF A NOSE??? I’M LOSING IT HERE???

AND TOUYA JUST SEEMS DEVASTATED OMG

because children aren’t stupid, after all. he understands that his dad is still looking to surpass All Might. and so he feels like a failure, and feels like his dad is trying to replace him because he wasn’t good enough. and even now, isn’t that what the adult Touya is trying to prove?? that he was good enough after all?? “I’ll show you what happens when you give up on me, dad”?? “I’ll show you what I can do”?? fuck my life fuck everything

AND YOU CAN SEE THE TOLL THAT IT’S ALL TAKING ON REI GETTING WORSE AND WORSE AS WELL OH GOD

really nice touch here with the panel outlines becoming all shimmery from the heat of Endeavor’s flames (and/or becoming more unstable as the family gets closer and closer to their breaking point). but man, Horikoshi I can’t handle this, please show us more cute kids or something I can’t

GKELKWFJLDKSHFLKL

WITTLE BABE. BEEB. BUBS. SMOL. lkj; oh ouch a piece of my heart just detached and latched onto him huh look at that

TODOROKI “I’M SO SMALL AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT’S GOING ON AND I DIDN’T ASK TO BE HERE” SHOUTO AHHHHH

crazy how they all just seem to know right off the bat lol. kid doesn’t even have object permanence yet, let alone a quirk. but do they care?? IT’S THE HAIR, RIGHT. WE’RE ALL THINKING IT, I’M JUST GONNA COME OUT AND SAY IT. they knew the minute they looked at him lol

AND MEANWHILE TOUYA IS OFF HAVING UNSUPERVISED TRAINING/CRYING SESSIONS IN THE MOUNTAINS OR WHATEVER, AND, UH OH

are those blue flames yet?? they seem pretty close

(ETA: this is one of the few cases where the manga being in black and white is infuriating lol.)

OH MY GOD AND STILL

so it’s not like he was so disinterested that he didn’t notice what was happening, and he was still trying to stop it and get through to him. trying to reassure him that it wasn’t the end of the world and there were other things he could do with his life, but this one particular thing just wasn’t going to happen

fucking hell. it’s agonizing seeing how close they actually were to fixing it. if he’d only said the right words, or if he’d realized at this point how destructive his obsession could be to his kids, and backed off from putting that same pressure on Shouto. we came so close to possibly having a happy ending

AND ALSO THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING BUT PLEASE LOOK AT HOW TOUYA IS LIKE THREE AND A HALF FEET TALL AND HIS DAD IS LIKE NINE AND A HALF FEET. Touya barely comes past his knees flkjlkg. the Todoroki household must have been so filled with like plastic stepstools to reach the bathroom sink and all the little baby toothbrushes, and baby gates to keep the kiddos out of the important grown-up rooms and stuff. and also days-old half-empty cups of water and stale crackers and hot wheels and my little ponies strewn everywhere

“BUT EVERYONE AT SCHOOL SAYS THEY’RE GONNA BE HEROES” a wild Deku parallel appears?? how bout that

I know this is like a pivotal moment in the Todo Tragedy and all, but fucking look at this lil dumpling

“sup bro, it’s me, the manifestation of your fears of inadequacy and lack of fatherly affections. a GAAA. ba-baAA-baa [gurgling baby sounds]”

OHHHHH IT’S THE SOUND OF MY HEART BREAKING OH NO

HE WANTS TO BE LIKE YOU ENJI. good lord somebody please just get this family some therapy

“DAD YOU IGNITED IT IN ME” flkjslkj nope, nope. not ready for this pain here

baby Shouto, would you like to weigh in on this affair? “DA!! ba-ga-daaa, [pacifier chewing noises]” oh my, you don’t say. so insightful for one so young

OH MY GODDDDDD

IT’S SO DRAMATIC BUT ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT ARE THE SHOUNEN WOOSH LINES SURROUNDING FOUR-MONTH-OLD SHOUTO LOL HE WAS LIKE THIS FROM BIRTH OH MY GOD I AM DYING HELP

SHOUTO YOU’RE RUINING THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER!?!?!

“yo, the fuck kind of family was I fucking born into” oh, son. if you only knew. IF YOU ONLY KNEW!!

(ETA: lmao I got so distracted by the ridiculous cuteness that I glossed over the fact that Baby Touya seems to possibly be aiming at him?? it’s hard to tell because he’s also super out of it from heatstroke and may just be losing control in his attempt to show off his upgrade.)

ANYWAY THAT’S THE END EXCEPT WHAT’S THIS LAST LINE OMG

ffffff. and we’re in for ANOTHER chapter of this next week?? MORE drama?? MORE BABIES?? MORE OF EIGHT-YEAR-OLD TOUYA’S SLOW DESCENT INTO MADNESS. MY HEART CAN’T TAKE IT, BUT ALSO YES PLEASE SIGN ME UP

#bnha 301 #dabi #todoroki touya #endeavor #todoroki enji #todoroki rei #todoroki shouto #todoroki fuyumi #todoroki natsuo #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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thatesqcrush · 4 years

Text

Game Night, Pt. 2

Rafael Barba x Reader. Sequel to Game Night. People were curious as to what other toys Rafael bought. Well, here you go. CW: edging, orgasm denial, various sex toys, degradation talk, dirty talk, vaginal fingering, p in v sex. Super NSFW. AN: forgive me pls for any typos. AN2: This covers the edging square in kink bingo.

WC: 1675

You laid on the bed, your heart racing as you anticipated Rafael’s next move. Your wrists and your ankles were bound together with golden yellow silk rope. You had gone over the situation in your mind over and over. Earlier in the evening you had accompanied Rafael at the victory party for a colleague who had become the newest District Attorney for Manhattan county. During the festivities, your inner brat had come out. For Rafael, he loved being your dominant. He truly enjoyed this new dynamic of your and his relationship. With his line of work, he saw the truly ugly side of sex, like Adam Cain choking with a belt and raping and sodomizing Jocelyn Paley. But with you, it wasn’t that at all. As a dominant, it was be thrilling and empowering to hold the power to make someone feel utterly and completely alive as you give them what they craved most. There was a kind of energy that sparked between you and him that was indescribable. There existed the yin and yang harmony that occurred between opposite yet complementary desires. And of course, the consent. Nothing was ever done against your will and you were free to use the safe word.

In fact, after the game night, you and him had explored more of the toys he had purchased and eventually, you had both taken a trip to the sex shop he had stumbled upon. And from there you had learned in sub dynamics, you were in fact, a brat.

You were intentionally naughty and defiant – in public, no less, which irritated Rafael to no end. He asked you to accompany him to speak with the Mayor – the Mayor New York City – and you said no – twice. And you loved to test his ability to stay calm.

“Carino, please. Not ahora.” Rafael warned as he tried to pull your arm up. You rolled your eyes at him and sighed exasperated – something you knew would grind his gears. Rafael pulled you up and he had to basically pull you along – as if you had become limp as a ragdoll.

And then, when the evening was over, while you both waited for the towncar to pull around, Rafael had gripped the back of your neck and whispered lasciviously in your ear: “You’re going to get what’s coming for you.”

You shrugged out of his grasp easily, as you let out a fake yawn. “I’d like to see you try.”

You turned to face Rafael, his bright eyes dark as they searched yours. A perfectly groomed eyebrow arched. He took a step closer and pulled you close to him. He gently pushed back a fallen tendril of hair and he lowered his head to your ear. To anyone else, it was a moment of romantic domesticity.

“Remember who you are talking to, you dirty fucking slut.”

And that is how you found yourself, laying in bed, completely naked. The red Badgley Mischka ball gown you had donned earlier lay in a heap in the corner of the bedroom. Rafael was still partly dressed – his bow tie was undone and had accompanied your dress. His sleeves were rolled up and a few buttons of his tuxedo shirt were undone. Rafael paced the room. A rolling iron bar cart had been re-purposed for sex toy storage. All toys laid out as if instruments on a surgical tray, waiting in anticipation to be called upon.

The shine of one particular toy caught Rafael’s eye. Next to it was another that could be used in tandem. Rafael chuckled darkly.

“Oh get on with it.” You called out as you struggled against the ropes. “Show me what you got.”

“Tsk, tsk, kitten. You’ve been a very naughty brat.”

“Me? A brat? Never!” You replied. Rafael stared at you intensely. You could almost see the wheels turning in his head and you shivered in anticipation.

“You knew what you were doing, Y/N. You’re a smart woman.” Rafael replied as his hand ghosted over your neck and trailed down to your legs. Rafael cupped your cunt, feeling hot and wet it already was. He squeezed it gently but firmly and you let out a small whimper. Rafael grinned.

“We’re going to have a lot of fun.” You peered over and watched as Rafael donned a single black latex glove.

“What’s that?” You asked.

Rafael approached and sat next to you. He waved his hand and you realized that there were different textures on each finger: ribbed, ridged, knobbed and swirled. Rafael pressed a kiss to your forehead before taking place between your legs. He drizzled some lube on his hand and pressed his fingers together, spreading it.

His fingers stroked your folds, teasing. You were already so wet with the anticipation of everything and one finger slid in easily, finding your sweet spot easily. The combination of the ridged texture of the glove and his ministrations, had your orgasm build quickly.

“Don’t come. Not yet.” Rafael replied, feeling your walls clench. You whimpered as Rafael slipped another finger in. He massaged you from the inside out, working you harder with his fingers. You moaned, letting the feelings of pleasure wash over you.

“I’m going to come!” You replied.

“Hold it, not yet.” Rafael told you. You swallowed hard, squeezing your eyes closed as you tried to keep it at bay. Again, the crescendo built and at the brink, Rafael stilled his fingers.

You let out a frustrated whine. “Oh fuck, papi, I want to cum, fuck…” you gasped.

“Want you to hold it.” Rafael told you, reaching up to roughly circle your clit with his fingers.

“Oh fuck, I don’t think I can.”

“You can and you will,” he told you sternly. “You only get to cum when papi says you can,” he instructed. You groaned in frustration.

“Por favor papi.” You pleaded. Rafael responded by delivering a sharp smack on your cunt, causing you to gasp and twitch on the bed.

Rafael stood and looked at you. You were completely helpless and completely vulnerable to him. He could see how wet you were and how your clit was already so swollen. He walked over to the bar cart and grabbed a few more toys. One toy was a clitoris pump. He added some lubricant to the soft silicone cup and pressed it over your clit. The pump’s suction pulsation drew blood flow into your intimate areas, stimulating them and making them puffier and more sensitive. Because it was suctioned in place, Rafael was able to get more another toy off the bar cart.

“I’m going to… oh fuck!” You cried out feeling your orgasm about to crest. “Oh no you don’t. You hold that.” Rafael replied as he removed the pump.

“No! I can’t. I need to come!” You sobbed.

Another sharp spank landed on your hot, swollen and slick cunt. You gasped as your body jerked in response. You felt tears prick behind your eyes.

“Good girls get to come. Not bratty sluts.” Rafael growled.

“Please, please. I can be good. I can be so good! I promise!” You begged shamelessly.

Rafael sunk two gloved fingers back into you, fucking you hard with his fingers. Your breathing was shallow and quick, your head was fuzzy, mouth dry as you cried out. You were positively soaked, making a mess of the sheets beneath you.

“Look at all that delicious cream.” Rafael praised as he continued to fuck you with his fingers. “Look at all that mess you’re making.” Your thighs were trembling. A sheen of sweat coated your body. And just when you didn’t think your tortured pussy could take anymore, Rafael showed off his pièce de résistance to you: a rose gold clitoral clamp.

“I don’t think… I can…” you gasped as the clamp was attached to your swollen clit.”

“You can and you will.” Rafael growled.

Meanwhile, Rafael was incredibly hard and ready to come himself. He made quick removal of his clothes, tossing them to the side with the rest of the clothes. His cock was angry, red and weeping.

Unable to hold back any longer, Rafael brushed his cock along the seam of your pussy, nudging the clit clamp ever so slightly, causing your to chant obscene words. He thrusted his hips forward until he was fully seated. You groaned and bit your bottom lip, his seafoam green eyes not leaving you once.

He set a hard and fast pace as he worked your overstimulated pussy to the edge of another orgasm.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck!” You babbled incoherently. The room was spinning, all sounds faded into white noise as your orgasm quickly peaked. Rafael slowed his pace before he reached over to remove the clit clamp.

“Cum for papi.” Rafael commanded; his breath was staggered. You howled his name as blood flow rushed your clit and your orgasm crashed over you like a thousand fireworks being set off at once. Your whole body shook as Rafael’s name left your lips as if in prayer.

Seeing you and feeling you come completely undone was Rafael’s own undoing and he came hard, spilling his seed inside of you as he choked out your name. Finally Rafael removed himself and he ran a hand through his own sweat soaked hair, watching as some of his release spilled out of you.

“Fuck, now that’s a sight to see.” He purred. You hummed in content, which jolted him back to reality. Rafael made quick move to remove his glove and then undo your restraints before pulling back the bedsheets. You crawled under the covers with Rafael and he hugged and caressed you, softly and gently praising you for how much of a good girl you really were.

“That was amazing.” You sighed.

“You’re amazing.” Rafael murmured as he pulled you into his strong arms, peppering forehead kisses.

Soon enough, you were both asleep, content in each other’s arms. As you drifted off to sleep, a smirk graced your face – you couldn’t wait to be a brat again.

Tags: @madpanda75 @tropes-and-tales @delia26 @mgarner1227 @beardedmccoy @youreverycolor @neely1177 @the-baby-bookworm @mrsrafaelbarba @skittle479 @ottosuricato @delia26 @sass-and-suspenders @mommakat32 @dreila03 @beccabarba @garturbo @lovebennycolon @imjustreallynosy @sweetsummertime99 @whyissvuruiningmylovelife @annabelleb49 @scarletsoldierrr @cesarofangirl78 @redlipstickandplaid @redlipstickandblacktea @zoeykaytesmom @differentshadesofgray @misssirenlove @esparza-army @bananas-pajamas @mishaissocoolike @thefanficfaerie @theenchantedgalleryofstories @catnip987 @choppedgalaxynerd @pieceofshittytitty @ktiz90 @evee87 @itsjustmyfantasyroom @blk0912 @detective-giggles @rampantmuses @jazzyjoi @caked-crusader @rachelxwayne @prurientpuddlejumper

#thatesqcrush kink bingo #rafael barba smut #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine

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marion-the-storyteller · 2 years

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I posted 681 times in 2021

17 posts created (2%)

664 posts reblogged (98%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 39.1 posts.

I added 55 tags in 2021

#beelzebub x reader - 7 posts

#lucifer x reader - 6 posts

#mammon x reader - 6 posts

#belphegor x reader - 6 posts

#asmodeus x reader - 6 posts

#satan x reader - 6 posts

#leviathan x reader - 6 posts

#obey me barbatos x reader - 4 posts

#obey me x reader - 4 posts

#obey me solomon x reader - 4 posts

Longest Tag: 52 characters

#i just wanna smack an asshole up the head that's all

My Top Posts in 2021

I'm making a story

Hi everyone! I just wanted to tell everyone who are following me or just passing by that i'm making a fanfiction story that is a crossover between Obey me and Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children. The story follows my MC named Danai and her younger sister Ophelia(Elia for short) and we get to follow them through their time living in The Devildom and how both of them are coping with living with seven demons after having been homeless for 5 years. I hope that it will turn out good and that you guys enjoy it.

24 notes • Posted 2021-03-24 18:27:08 GMT

Imagine if...

Whenever Satan gets annoyed, pissed or angry, he starts speaking with an scottish accent. Like it's so thicc that not even God himself can fucking understand him! The few times that will let the scottish accent slip up is when isn't feeling these previously mentioned emotions is when he wanna outsass Lucifer, flirt with the MC or freaking out over cats and happily ranting to anyone who is willing to listen about the new book that he has just read.

61 notes • Posted 2021-03-25 00:07:01 GMT

Imagine if...

(Warning: possible grammatical error, typos, mental health issues, spoilers and angst. Please if you are not comfortable with this, please jump ahead and skip it. You can go and read other people's stories if you feel more comfortable. I deeply apologize if may have triggered anyone, it was not my intention)

Whenever Lilith's birthday or the anniversary of her death comes around the corner, all of the brothers would stay at home(Dia already knows what's going on, so he gives all of them 2 days off out of respect) and probably do something with each other or to themselves that is the polar opposite to what their sin actually represent(like the seven virtues, type of thing), like Lucifer would finally let himself break down from all of the pressure of having to keep his brothers safe and having to work himself to the bone from the paperwork, and just let himself feel the humility and allow the fear that he felt through the years when he fought during the War. Mammon would have probably bought like a crystal that was probably Lilith's favor or was her birthstone, and maybe would have bought something for all of his brothers something that reminded him of all of them. Leviathan would probably be sitting in his room where he would just sit and reminisce about the memories that he had with his brothers and sister and just silently appreciate the fact that he got to spend time with his brothers and with Lilith. Even tho he has never met his sister before, Satan would have also been sitting in his room, laying on his bed and just feel a strange form of emptiness that is surprisingly soothing and a painful sorrow and mourn the loss of the older sister he had the misfortune of never meeting, but he's also allowing himself to be a bit kinder and merciful towards himself by reminding himself that he did essentially meet Lilith through all of his brothers. Asmodeus would have probably given his brothers a self-care treatment. However, he would also let himself take off the make-up and allow himself to look at the beauty in the people and his surroundings around him, just appreciating the flaws that he has, but most of all; appreciating the flaws and complexities of his surrounding and the people in his life as well. Beelzebub's appetite would have started diminished a lot to the point that he wouldn't eat a lot, and he would have mostly been busying himself with making the others favorite foods, but a part of Beel is tempted to snack on the food, but that part of him is suppressed by his desire to make his brothers' favorite foods. After he's done with making the others' food, he then begins making sister's favorites, as a way to honor Lilith. Belphegor would have focused really hard on trying to stay awake for the 48 hours when the anniversary of Lilith's death or her birthday is near, and he would do absolutely anything to keep himself awake: he would drink energy drinks and very strong coffee and eat sugary foods to stay hyper and wide awake(they kinda work, but it just makes him feel more stressed out and his sleep deprivation is making the memories become so painful he actually starts having flashback of seeing her die, and him and his brothers falling). Anything that has to do with his beloved sister are always very painful for him, and the reason why he stays up for 48 hours aren't just to honor her but also keep the nightmares at bay. However, the first 20 hours have gone by Lucifer, Beel and the others are there with him and forces him to go to sleep, but they all fall asleep with him, all cuddled up to each other in the living room on the (assumingly) carpeted floor that has been covered up with pillows and blankets.

** I'm so sorry for making this Imagine/headcannon super depressing, but I hope that all of you enjoy. If you guys have any forms of ideas about something very similar to what the brothers would have done then we can talk about in PMs or in the comment sections, I find it really interesting listening to what people have to say and maybe you guys can help me improve my writing a little bit, cuz it's been a while since I have written basically any form of stories now and feel really rusty. Blessed be**

86 notes • Posted 2021-03-18 14:19:45 GMT

Imagine if...

Mammon had developed a New York accent after having spent a few years in during The Great Depression, then gone back there again around our time, were spent hanging out with very famous mobsters(such as Al Capone), and checking around the place. He would be the one who would be stirring up the chaos between the gangs that where well famous in New York. He still visit the place, though

But when he came back to the Devildom, he couldn't drop the accent completely, so whenever he's talking with his brothers, Luke, Simeon, Solomon, Barbs, Dia or Mc about certain places when he gets the chance to take them there, that's when the New Yorker within him comes out.

May or may not have accidentally told an angry Lucifer "To go back LA, Giuliani!" which might have left him traumatized, and left his brothers so fucking confused but also in tears from laughing so much.

Has definitely not wanted to get a dog pretty damn early in the morning, but also thought that it wouldn't have been fair on the dog. Not at all,

157 notes • Posted 2021-03-15 17:19:04 GMT

Imagine if...

Lucifer meets a very young child mc(4-5 y/o) who was having a hard time saying peacock(Peacocks are his symbolic animal) and they saw him in his demon form(specifically his clothes) for the first time, and Mc sees him and they would excitedly exclaim "Pretty butt chicken!"

The image of seeing the look of absolute utter confusion and defeat on Lucifer's face as his younger brothers as well as Dia, Barbs, the angels and Solomon are on the floor, wheezing and crying is absolutely sending me

348 notes • Posted 2021-03-15 13:51:56 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

Huh... I didn't honestly expect that

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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warcats-cat · 3 years

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Fragile

I’m so glad I got to participate in the @goloveday exchange! I don’t do fic exchanges often, but this one was a lot of fun! Special thanks to @miniaturefern for beta'ing this for me. @saer-m, I really hope you enjoy your gift! It was wonderful to write this for you!! <3

Also cross posted on Ao3!

TW: a little bit of insecurity, crying, references to past trauma. It’s that good good hurt/comfort tho. <3

Crowley had everything planned perfectly. Really. He’d tagged along on one of angel’s trips for some special book that Crowley didn’t fully care about; he just liked to hear Aziraphale’s voice. He liked the way the angel’s face literally lit up, he started almost glowing out his eyeballs, when he got excited. Crowley liked it when Aziraphale was happy. Crowley would damn his soul all over again to see that glowing smile forever. So he’d come with Aziraphale on a little trip, listening to his angel babble about botched phrasing and hilariously disastrous typos and watching from the corner of his eye as the fluffy head bounced and soft hands jittered.

And of course, as soon as Crowley found out they were going on a trip of any kind, he started planning. This was their first trip, after all.

Well, their first as a couple at least.

And it was a little weird, being officially a thing and having the freedom to hold hands or press into each other’s sides at night; knowing that, for once, they didn’t have to worry about “them” watching. If “they” were watching, it didn’t really matter. And Crowley wanted to celebrate the idea.

So he had driven his angel out to Satan-Knows-Where in the middle of autumn. He had watched his angel barter and chat with people milling about in shop fronts and street market stalls. He had listened to his angel prattle on and almost drifted away on the sound of his voice.

God just wasn’t interested in his happiness, apparently.

See, the opposite of that exciting feeling of holding hands was being able to feel Aziraphale’s hand tense when they got dirty looks from passersby. The opposite of the warmth coming from Aziraphale’s soft side was the coldness he felt when the angel tensed, just slightly, and pulled the nearest breadth away. "They" may not have been watching, but the humans certainly were. And the humans around them lately were making Aziraphale upset. And Crowley didn’t really know why.

So Crowley had taken to planning things. A picnic in the park near their hotel, late evening, and maybe some stargazing (since Aziraphale seemed to love Crowley’s stories as much as the demon enjoyed his angel’s.) Quiet and away from prying, judgmental eyes. Crowley only hoped it made Aziraphale feel safer.

It didn’t.

Crowley could feel it right off. Aziraphale was tense; he chose to carry the basket instead of holding Crowley’s hand. He kept himself carefully apart, not even bumping Crowley’s shoulder affectionately as he had the morning before. Crowley was chilly in the warm night air, feeling alone despite the angel at his side.

The picnic went carefully; Aziraphale sat opposite the demon, and resolutely fixed his eyes just above Crowley’s glasses. He poured wine and nibbled bread and cheese and very purposefully made small talk, as if Crowley wouldn’t notice something amiss after six thousand years of knowing the bastard.

After almost a hundred years of loving him.

After almost a full year of getting to say it out loud.

“Angel, what the Heaven is wrong with you?” Crowley finally blurted, interrupting Aziraphale’s droll observations on cicadas or some such insect with all the grace of a newborn elephant. Aziraphale’s face sunk as the angel huddled into himself, and Crowley began tripping over his own tongue in an effort to course-correct. “No. That’s not- I said that wrong. Uh. Yeah. I don’t mean it like, ‘what’s wrong with you’, but like, ‘you’ve been weird lately and I don’t know if I did something’ but if I did do something you know you can tell me because I want to fix it, right?” Crowley stammered out, as if trying to catch Aziraphale’s heart as it sank.

Aziraphale stayed quiet for a long time after that, staying in his little hunched position, looking like the picture of sadness to the demon in front of him. This was not going to plan. He’d brought the angel’s favorites and yet Aziraphale had barely eaten or drank anything. He’d tried to have a nice outdoor meeting because Aziraphale loved picnics, but the angel had shuttered at every passerby for the last fifteen minutes. He’d talked about nothing more in-depth than the weather, and had ignored all of Crowley’s digs and efforts to start debates in favor of remaining passive and demure. Finally, Crowley couldn’t stand the quiet; whispering softly into the darkness before him. “Angel?

The angel swallowed and took a light, steadying breath, before leaning in and softly pressing his forehead to Crowley’s.

“My dearest, I think I should like to go inside…” he said, barely murmuring himself. Crowley could feel the bridge of his angel’s nose pressing the bridge of his glasses. He could feel the warmth from the angel’s skin on his forehead. And he could feel the barest tremble of the body underneath.

“Okay, angel; anything you want.” He replied quietly. “Do you want to walk there, or..?” When Aziraphale’s answer wasn’t forthcoming, Crowley chose to snap his fingers, bringing them right into their room and onto the plush bed, barely a pop to denote the change. And yet, Aziraphale didn’t move for several minutes.

Crowley knew, of course, that Aziraphale didn’t do well being rushed, but he was also acutely aware of warm tears dropping down between the pair. So the demon chose instead to tilt his head, just slightly, and gently nuzzle the angel’s face, hoping to bring comfort. Aziraphale’s cheek twitched, and he let out a soft, shaken sigh.

“I’m old.” he said quietly.

Once again, Crowley’s handling of the situation was eloquent and sensitive;

“Well duh, we’ve both been around for six millennia! They could be studying us in the Royal Museum, angel!”

Aziraphale let out a wet “Ha!” and started to cry harder, at which point Crowley realized he hadn’t quite soothed the situation like he’d thought, and wrapped his arms around the angel tightly.

“Oh, you know I don’t know what to say you prissy bastard. I haven’t got near the high-and-mighty education you do.” That brought a more earnest chuckle out of Aziraphale, and the angel reached to wipe the tears from his cheeks, wiggling from Crowley’s grasp for a moment. “You’ve gotta tell me what you mean, when you say something like that,” the demon continued.

“I suppose I mean old-fashioned,” Aziraphale began, “And really even then I can’t explain.” He sat quietly for a moment, trying to recompose himself. Crowley moved to pull Aziraphale into his chest, wanting to hold the angel. Once again, however, Aziraphale tried to pull away.

“I’m afraid.” Aziraphale said softly. “I’m afraid because I feel the archangels' eyes on me even when I know they aren’t, and that lot have plenty of other things to do. And I’m afraid because I love you very much, but I worry I’m not right.”

Crowley’s heart leapt at hearing the little ‘I love you’ in the angel’s confession, since the pair had only said it out loud a few times since their retirement; but it sank right down again at hearing the rest of what Aziraphale had to say. He tried to give the confession the appropriate amount of time for consideration, before finally asking, “I don’t know what you mean?”

The angel’s eyes became wet again, and he let out a heavy sigh; “Oh, Crowley.” He had a sad but fond smile, and pulled Crowley back onto the bed, finally cuddling up into the demon’s side.

“You’re you, my dear. You’re clever and tall and fantastically dapper, and you’re constantly swaying about as if you haven’t got a care in the world for what the people around us think, and I’m most certain you really don’t . And I suppose it’s not really my worry what the humans think of us. But…” He quieted once more, and all but buried his face in Crowley’s side. “I can’t just let go. They were my family, Crowley, and they said such awful things to me, and I want to just forget but I can’t and I’m afraid I never will and I don’t want to just be your constant reminder of my own problems that I can’t solve. I don’t want to do that to you.”

“So you’ve been thinking about the self-obsessed pigeon again,” Crowley teased. Aziraphale turned delightfully red at that, and smacked Crowley’s chest, smiling despite himself.

“You really mustn’t call him that. It's terribly rude.” Aziraphale said, sniffling.

“Oh! Rude! You didn’t tell me he didn’t like the nickname!” Crowley teased back. He snuggled closer and planted a kiss right on Aziraphale’s cheekbone. “I didn’t know we were being nice to the pigeon now! After he's treated my dove so terribly!” Crowley attempted another nuzzle and won a beautiful little wet laugh from the angel.

“Look, angel. Angel, I..." He looked up at the ceiling, then back down. "Angel," he said, "my love is not fragile. Do you really think I care if you still wake me up in the middle of the night because you’re feeling insecure a thousand years from now? Granted, I might be a little grumpy about it. 'Gotta get my beauty sleep in after all. But..." he paused, suddenly a little self-conscious, "I'll... I'll still love you. No matter how many times I have to remind you.”

Aziraphale’s tears were soaking Crowley’s shirt, but the demon couldn’t bring himself to care. He could sense the change; they weren’t borne strictly of sadness any longer. Crowley held his angel for a long time after that, letting the night wrap around them. They could picnic and stargaze tomorrow. Drive back to London later in the week. Tomorrow Aziraphale would brew tea and Crowley would tease him about the new book. Right now, Crowley was exactly where he wanted to be, planning be blessed.

The demon pulled a hand up, for just a moment, and snapped his fingers. The pair became cocooned in soft, heavy blankets. They held onto each other, two stars so close they might as well have been one.

#warcats writes #good omens fic #ineffable husbands #goloveday2021 #hurt/comfort #good omens fluff #tw insecurity #tw references to trauma #tw crying

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iacon-stargazer · 3 years

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THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE: MUN & MUSE

fill out & repost ♥ this meme definitely favors canons more, but i hope oc’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. multimuses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

tagged by: stolen from @oneshallfall like.... months ago. im a slow gremlin hjksd. it's been in my drafts and i finally decided to finish the last few sections while working on clearing them out

tagging: steal it

MY MUSE IS. canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless

is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO.

is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? Well.../ NO / IDK. (i know optimus is but i don’t really... know about orion? i have seen a handful of fanartists who turn him into a very sexualized moe baby but i’m not sure about the fandom at large)

is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK.

are they underrated? YES / NO. (lmao there’s like no fan content with him unless it’s with megatronus)

were they relevant to the main story? YES / NO.

were they relevant to the main character? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

are they widely known in their world? YES / NO. (not yet.... lol)

how’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?

This... this is a trick question in this goddamn mess of a continuity. That said, I try my absolute best to make my portrayal coherent with the TFP show... even if said show contradicts itself at times. I take inspiration from the earlier parts (the thirteen primes section) of the Covenant of Primus for his origin backstory, but ignore the rest of the Covenant since it makes absolutely no sense with his characterization in... literally anything else. I’ve peeked at Exodus and it utterly sucks, but I’ve picked up bits and pieces of concepts that originated there just from spending time in the fandom. Aside from that... I spend a ton of time thinking about how to weave everything together in a way that both makes sense and makes for a character development arc.

SELL YOUR MUSE! (aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.)

Orion is genuinely kind, thoughtful, and introspective, very loving of the world around him.

He’s also a more complex character than is initially obvious - despite mostly being good sweet pure baby nerd he’s still flawed, with many of those flaws being his strengths put into the wrong situation. His strong morals can lead to dogmatism, and he’s only slightly less likely to deliver lectures than Optimus. His determination to be kind and help everyone can come off as unintentionally patronizing at times; he has a very “well-intentioned semi-privileged middle class” perspective that he’s not always self-aware of. However, he’s also willing to look at himself critically and learn/adapt.

Essentially, he has many of the same traits as Optimus... just more or less apparent and/or developed. He's less confident than he eventually becomes through his future experience with leadership, wanting to change the world for the better but sometimes struggling to ground his plans in reality—something that continues to apply, but with reduced intensity and frequency over time. Idealistic cinnamon roll will eventually develop some realism, though never really quite enough. His selflessness remains a strength for now, but we know that eventually it will dip into martyristic tendencies.

NOW THE OPPOSITE! (list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?)

He could be potentially ‘boring’ in some senses. he’s the polite, considerate ‘next door’ type, who has for most of his life has just lived as a very average middle caste nobody. He’s more laid-back than he eventually becomes as optimus, but where others might get into trouble and shenanigans he’s most likely to just express concern. And since I try to keep him at least mostly ic, even with non-serious posts, this can derail ‘fun’ stuff and I fear dissuade some interaction.

While I try my best to give him realistic flaws that work with his character, he could still be seen as a little too good. very kind, understanding, forgiving, patient, considerate... almost endlessly so. A lot of my “he’s so good and pure” interpretation comes from using his having been the thirteenth prime as backstory, where he was pretty much the epitome of that, but some might not like the “he was a literal deity in a past life” idea for its “super special chosen one protagonist” elements.

His responsiveness to his environment can also be a downside. He’s not the type to start things; he just reacts and responds, standing his ground and finding himself when things get crazy around him. without megatronus, he may have eventually attempted political campaigning, but it wouldn’t have gotten very far. He needs to have more intense characters or events around him for major plots to really go places. Without those nothing would ever happen besides slice of life fluff, because he’s content with that kind of life.

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?

Honestly I just wanted to write op/ratch fhsjkdjsdh. But I also wanted to be able to interact with a variety of muses and so I chose Orion over Optimus because he’s not so emotionally closed off, which I figured would give more flexibility beyond the handful of characters op would reasonably have close personal and/or plot-important relationships with. Also, I can relate to him on a thought-process level which lets me get into his head easily, which additionally made him an appealing choice for my first real rp muse.

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?

I just love him so much, especially with the layers of his character I've built up around him. I don't always have inspiration to write or rp, but I think about him a lot. When I do find motivation to write, it's generally out of wanting to continue to work on developing him and just having a chance to express his characterization.

SOME MORE PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN.

do you think you give your character justice? YES / NO.

do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO.

do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO. (i should do it more...)

do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO. (at least most days fhsdhfskj)

are you confident in your writing? YES / NO. (it waxes and wanes. I know I'm a good writer but I could still be better...)

are you a sensitive person? YES / NO.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?

I’ll be honest; I’ve never gotten criticism. I haven’t been here very long in comparison to some and I’ve never been that popular, so I figure I’m pretty easy to just ignore. I guess how I would feel about it would depend on what it was and how it was delivered, though I like to think I would be reasonable regardless

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?

yes? yes absolutely?

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?

I would be curious to hear their reasoning, but I think enough about how everything fits together that chances are I would agree to disagree

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?

Depends on if their disagreement makes sense. Maybe I’ll give back my own reasoning for why I characterize the way I do. Maybe I’ll just agree to disagree, if their view is just totally different from mine. If they have valid points I’ll probably overthink it and spiral into self doubt. In all cases I’ll spill my thoughts to friends on discord.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?

......Orion in general or? ... fhsjkdhf...... Well if it was mine specifically that might hurt lol. But at the same time.... I doubt i’d agree with their takes either so... fair enough.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?

Sure. I’m good at grammar so if something glaring is there it’s probably a typo I missed and I’ll be grateful for the chance to edit it out before more people see it lol

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?

Yeah. I’m pretty quiet most of the time because I just don’t have energy to talk to a lot of people, and I never want to get caught in drama. I honestly wouldn’t know what to do in a situation like that. I tend to avoid conflict, I’m quick to apologize, and polite with anyone I don’t know very well.

#;the art student behind the muse {ooc}#;as for myself... {tag game}

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suffering-and-happy-about-it · 4 years

Text

Helplessly Hoping (Favored Ones, Part 19.)

Series description: Many things were surely fucked up in the year 2038, but no-one ever told anyone how all of it went down. What happened before a group of people left for Seattle to handle personal matters? Why did one girl refuse to leave all of it be? And why there were so many dead in the end?

Quote for the chapter: “And you consider yourself the saviour of the human race?” - Shawn James

Part summary: Just as Ellie demanded, there was the whole meeting about the fucking Baldwin cottage situation happening. And the results of it were more or less concerning.

A/N: I’ve tried to use as many in-game/trailer/promotional dialogue as I could, altering it to suit the story, and I’ve spent at least an hour alone on those dialogues (finding them in the first place, then re-writing it, altering it, etc.). Hope you’ll enjoy. (OPEN TAGS FOR FUNNY HAHA JOKE)

Warnings: Tommy is the purest of heart and the dumbest of ass, Jesse’s ass, and angry fucking Maria. Mentions of Abby, WLFs, torture and gore, anxiety. PROBABLY A LOAD OF TYPOS Y’ALL.

Word count: 7.3K

Tagging: @nemodoren @xxgoldenhour @missdictatorme @peakymarvels @davnwillcome @pickleriiick @jodiereedus22 @gladiosamicitias @tamkashi @eternallyvenus @avengerssstuff @fangirl-inthe-us @avery-miller @mikah-writes @mad-hatter-98 @sadiaafrin99 @flavorishy @mr-robot-x @

Series master list: H E R E

Joel Miller’s playlist for the bonfire occasions: H E R E

Youtube playlists: JACKSON DAYS | SEATTLE DAYS

Early spring of 2038, two days before departure to Seattle:

Learning how to walk on your legs again was kinda funny, especially when you had Joel and Ellie around most of the time. As suspected, Joel calmed down about the unnecessary fight rather quickly, focusing on more oppressing matters at that moment, inviting Ellie to look after you when he was gone and the other way around. You were still noticeably climbing, but soon, you could walk to downtown on your own and you didn't even have to beg Joel to stop for a sec to catch your breath.

Ellie, no matter how hard she tried to ignore it, was still intrigued by the fact that you and Joel are now an official couple, but that didn't mean she had got the right to tell someone what to do. And she didn't even want to... It was just... Bothering her at some times. But as long as you were looking healthy and happy with the old man, she could still get over the whole situation somehow. The bad blood between you and Dina lasted for a few days until you played a card game for spending the evening with Ellie, which you one singlehandedly, yet you showed your character and told Dina she can keep your best friend for the night.

Life almost seemed to be going back to normal... Except it wasn't going anywhere. The only people who knew about it was you, Joel, Maria, and Tommy. You didn't want to tell Ellie and you hoped that your whole mental situation will be over before you and she have some girly plans. On many occasions, you've woken up in the middle of the night, straightaway paralyzed. A single muscle on your body couldn't move and all you saw was the woman looking down on you, asking the question over and over again - where is Joel Miller? Do you know him?

And anything you've tried wasn't helping you. Pills that should give you a sleepless night? You woke up in the middle of the night, panting and disoriented. Herbal teas? Made you sick. Joel hammering you to the bed before going to sleep? You've been staring at the ceiling as the man slept with his head on your naked chest. Joel and Ellie singing you a duet while you and Dina sat on the couch, watching these two arguing about every single detail? No, that didn't help either.

You didn't know if Abby wanted to trap you inside your head, but she accomplished the mission perfectly. You could work throughout the day, as long as the job didn't need a lot of walking around, you were still the same you. But as soon as no-one was looking at you, panic and anxiety got a hold on you. One time, you were even helping in the kitchen and you were joking around with the cooks - and suddenly, your gaze fell on one of the knives. Suddenly, you couldn't hear anything but cutting vegetables, and each of these sounds reminded you of the woman. The scar on your thigh started to burn as you suddenly sat in the corner, rocking yourself to keep calm.

There was still the old you inside of that head, but it wasn't quite the same person at all. You've been a former Firefly, yet you weren't on a single mission. You killed a human person before - just to protect the man you loved. What Abby has done to you was barbarism, brutality, and vileness. And that was bringing up the conflict inside of you around which you kinda could get your head wrapped around.

No-one knew what happened in the cottage yet, because you and Tommy wanted to think about the incident on your own first. And so you did - but it was tearing you up in halves. On one hand, you didn't care for that party of shitheads at all, you didn't want to see them again. You were just glad they had left, at least seemingly, and that they aren't a threat for you or Joel anymore.

On the other hand, you had the feeling that no matter who it was, they'll be back. They were searching after Joel and they didn't find the man the first time. Who was granting you that they won't come back for round two? This time killing you for good? Just slicing your throat for the fun of it? Another question was popping on your head rather frequently. Would Abby kill you straightaway if she'd figure out you're sleeping with Joel? Just for the fun of causing pain? Just to leave a message?

All you did was consider yourself lucky - if they wouldn't come when they did, you and Tommy would've laid there dead for hours, maybe days. But the luck was supposed to run out one day, right? It was just comforting you that it didn't run out on that March day. Normally, you weren't of these who would've sought revenge. You would just go on with your life, no matter how hard that would turn out to be. But Joel... When it came to Joel, the way you took the issues had changed. You wanted and needed to know he's safe. And until Abby and her friends were searching for the man, he wasn't safe.

I ain’t a good man at all, you know? You may be thinkin’ I am, but trust me, I ain’t. You could hear Joel repeating that sentence over and over again. I’ve done some terrible things and if you’d hear them, you’d most likely get up and never come back again. I was survivin’ for a damn long time. I’ve seen my friends end up dead. I’ve hurt many people. I’ve done stuff only the worst people do, you hear me? And Abby was just of the many people he’d done wrong or dirty in the past. The result of shit Joel had done.

But you hadn't got the feeling that Joel knew Abby personally. She was young, maybe at your age, just a few years older. Maybe exactly your age, it was hard to tell. But... If Abby had known Joel personally, she'd recognize Tommy. These men bared an undeniable likeness. So Joel wouldn't know who was she even if you'd ask him. The only thing you and Tommy took as a clue was the appliques on their jackets - WLF. Washington Liberation Front. They were soldiers just as you thought so. And came all the way from Seattle. To look for Joel. Which made you everything but calm. You asked Tommy about how Joel could've come to contact with such people... And Tommy didn't have a clue.

Which only put Joel's words in perspective. You didn't know a whole lot about your man and there wasn't any certainty that you'd ever get to know these things about him. What could Joel had possibly do tying up back to WLF? Smuggle guns, bomb, supplies? Kill someone for them..? Or one of them? Joel was a man of many faces and a harsh past, which you kinda knew ever since you got to know Ellie better. But it was things like these that put everything to context.

When you both agreed it's time to tell the rest, you've gathered only the closest people to discuss what to do now. Ellie and Dina's standpoints were set completely straight, they knew exactly what to do. Joel, Tommy, Jesse, and Maria were on the neutral to calm side of the spectrum. Diego was forbidden to come and you were somewhere between going after Abby and staying put. It was all to be settled down on that evening.

"So, we all know why were here." - You started, sitting at the head of the table next to Tommy. You two somehow got out of the situation WLFs put you in, but it was sure that you're not the same way you've been before - while you were only visibly limbing and some of the leg movements made you uneasy, you were fucked up mentally. Just as Tommy was perfectly healthy mentally, he told you he lived through worse things as a Firefly, his knee was poorly working as it should. Sure, he was walking, but there was no certainty that he can lead other patrols with his current physical state. - "And we decided that it will be better from my point of view because I heard a few things Tommy didn't." - You looked at the man, who nodded to assure you. - "Shall we?"

You've started since the very morning of the eighth of March - why did you even go to the patrol in the first place, how did the horde cleansing progress, up to the point where you first met her. When you mentioned her, tears appeared in your eyes again as you looked away from all the people to calm down. - "Give her a minute, it's just too much." - Tommy said to the rest as he walked to you with his cane in his hand, hugging your shoulder as he looked out of the window beside you. He shouldn't be walking at all, but because his knee wasn't drastically broken, he persuaded Bobby to give him just a brace and a cane. Either way, it was more than a month since the whole cottage thing, you both had got better. And sure, no-one was pressuring you to talk. You had the whole night if you needed to.

For you, it was a terrifying experience to go through all of this... Again. Mentally. It wasn't good for you to go back to the day in such details, but it needed to be done. Yet with every syllable, Abby's eyes got clearer and clearer inside of your head, watching you, judging you, laughing at you. The moment when she lifted you off the ground like a piece of shit, it was all there suddenly. Your throat clenched for a second while you re-lived through the memory, making your gasp for air and gently smooth the veins there. Tommy smoothed your shoulder carefully, looking at the profile of your face.

"Feelin' good now, kiddo?" - Tommy asked when you blinked twice to get yourself out of the moment. With a long sigh, you nodded and walked back to the table to continue with the story.

"There was a blizzard out there, you could barely see three feet in front of you. So the woman, named Abby, offered us to show us the way to a nearby cabin where she and her friends were taking refuge at the time. Naturally, we agreed to this offer because we would most likely get lost in the snow and freeze to death somewhere. Abby's friends saved us from a small portion of the horse, and they took us inside." - You looked directly at Joel for a minute, trying to find comfort inside his face, finding concern only. That wasn't a good sign. - "When I stepped inside, I immediately noticed that there's something wrong with the people. I've seen a lot of groups passing through Jackson to get some sleep, gather supplies, food, water... But these didn't look anything like it. The clothes, moves, each of them looked strong. There was this lady who approached me and asked me if I'm feeling okay. To which I replied, that I am feeling alright.

I tried to signal Tommy that I don't feel safe inside that house, but he was talking to this Hispanic man, I didn't quite catch his name. So I played along and followed Abby deeper into the house. There, I met... Oscar? Omar? Oliver...? Owen. This man was Owen. And he was furious and they started to argue. For a reason, everyone started to gather in the room to look at us, and I could tell straight away that something was going downhill. Tommy was chatting with them and suddenly, Abby turned to me and asked me this question. I can hear the voice asking it every fucking night, again, again, and again. It haunts me." - A shaky breath left your lips as you jolted in discomfort. Tommy already knew what was coming, so he just stared at his hands entwined on the table.

"Do you know a man named Joel Miller by any chance?" - You repeated, hearing Abby asking you the question, staring down on you. You've been feeling everything you felt when Abby was just one foot away from you. The nerves, dry mouth, and the desperate need to keep yourself under control. And this time, it even felt harder than before, because you knew what comes next.

"To which I replied that I don't know any man by that name. But I fucked up, it is how it is. And I swear to you that this... Woman... Put her arm around my neck, picked me off the ground, and choked me. And all she said was 'Hey, we don’t wanna kill you. But we will.' And she tried to do just that. Before you guys came in." - A shiver ran down your spine as the picture of the woman kneeling beside you popped up inside your head. Owen holding the chair as Abby had beaten you up, helping her with the nails. Your hands were looking disgusting. Sure, it was way better and most of the nails started to grow back, but the ones on your pinkies and ring finger were gone.

"What are we waiting for?" - Ellie asked suddenly, having every stare turned at her and Dina. She was visibly shaken - not only did they fucked you up like two dogs, but they were after Joel as well. - "Washington Liberation Front. We know where that is, don't we?" - The girl asked fiercely, but Maria pointed her palm at the girl, stopping her from hyping a super-dangerous plan which would only get everyone killed.

"Joel, when did you work for the WLF?" - Maria furrowed, looking at her brother-in-law. - "I thought you were smuggling for the Fireflies and other people back in Boston, but you never mentioned running the business in Seattle... Or in this area generally." - The woman asked silently, and each of you looked at Joel. But the man was out of his mind as well - it was his fault, just as he thought so. The past always found its way to him, didn't it?

"I've never worked in Seattle. I don't know any WLFs, never met 'em." - Joel answered shortly, looking down on his palms

"It doesn't matter. I don't care who the fuckers are, what did they want of what they need from the old man here. They've been trying to get one of us, what if they show up again?" - Ellie jumped straight to the chase again, this time standing up. - "They most likely know where we live, it doesn't take a genius to figure out the patrol trails, and they've been here once, what thing on Earth is holding them from getting into the area again? Huh? And what if they kill us all? What if they bring more people back? Huh?" - She looked at everyone with a hint of disgust in her face. This time, Tommy was the one to take a calm approach.

"Kiddo, sit down, will ya? We have no idea what we're walkin' into. You don't know anythin' about them. We don't know how large that group is, how armed they are," - "What are you doing?" - Ellie snapped back. The girl was walking on mighty thin ice, as Joel would say, but you got what she's after. These people were nothing but a threat to Jackson - and more importantly to Joel. You couldn't simply leave that be, hoping they won't come back. But you didn't say anything out loud, you just sat there and looked into the table desk, minding your own business.

"I don't care. Joel told me that this isn't my decision to make. Guess what, Tommy. It is from now on. These people tried to harm my family. I think you got the best idea about what kind of people they are. And I'm going no matter how you decide. You can't stop this. You can't stop me." - The girl walked out of the room, leaving you all there. Dina looked at Maria, who was already scheming a plan.

"This is suicide. No-one ain't is going after them. I don't care, I... I will put my men around her house to keep an eye on her..." - Maria was whispering frantically, trying to figure out what to do to keep the girl down. Joel exhaled loudly and took one look at you, closing his eyes in pain. He knew that empty look you were giving the piece of furniture. Whenever Ellie was about to take off, you will follow her for a few various reasons - you didn't want to get herself killed. And you didn't want to see Joel get hurt. And deep down inside, there was another reason which was the most understandable - you wanted to hurt back the people who hurt you. It could be barely seen that you're trembling, thinking about what you'll do. The world seemed to be so empty suddenly.

There was no other choice - you were going to Seattle.

"If she decides to go, Maria, no patrols are going to stop Ellie. The question is who will come with her." - Jesse told everyone quietly. With that, Joel had the last spark of home inside of him - maybe you won't be so stupid to agree with Ellie's short-fire plan. Yet when you closed your eyes, having a small wrinkle on your forehead, he knew that you're not the case.

Shortly after, everyone got home. And it felt off-putting to watch Joel's house, knowing you'll leave as soon as Ellie decides to go. You and Dina agreed about exchanging the intel the other day, once she and Ellie come up with some plan.

The house was looking way better than ever before. Up to that point, you never realized it has a perfect location in a good neighborhood. Especially, when Joel didn't have many neighbors. All you could see was the best ways to sneak to his door, and when you left that out, you only knew the inside of the house. And as the spring was slowly coming back, the flowers, bushes, and trees started to finally blossom after the long winter. Birds were singing the whole time you were walking to the porch, the warm wing was smoothing your skin and messing with your hair. How comes that you've never noticed the golden film of the sunlight? Or the innocent white of the evening clouds?

"You 'kay back there?" - Joel asked you from opening the door. You were leaning into the railing, watching the surroundings. After a small while of watching the man, you gave him a vulnerable smile and nodded. For a minute, Joel still stood there and waited for you to come in, but you didn't move an inch. You turned your head back to look at the neighborhood and the mountains in the landscape. That was when he walked next to you, leaning into the wood as well. - "What's goin' inside that head of yours, huh?" - He whispered, slowly pulling closer until your shoulders bumped into each other.

"Never noticed how beautiful Jackson can be - until now, cowboy." - An honest whisper left your lips. Joel didn't like your expression at all - there was this sadness and melancholy inside of it and Joel would bet everything that he knew exactly what was going on inside your head.

"Girl, if you're thinkin' about the Abby kiddo, stop it. For both my and yours sake. This kind of thoughts won't bring any good, you hear me?" - The man whispered and lowered his head enough to kiss the top of your shoulder. - "What happens at Baldwin, that stays at Baldwin. I don't want you to see you get near the stables, weaponry, you won't be sneakin' out at midnight, we clear?" - Joel asked, having you snickering at his statement and the whole topic. You knew you're about to pull that stunt. And he knew it as well. But it felt cute that he's putting so much care into this whole thing.

"I told you that I'm not thinking about the Baldwin cottage thing. I'm not. I'm just looking at nature, taking in the sights, you know?" - You smiled, trying to look at least a bit happy for Joel. The man looked into your eyes for a moment with an unnatural expression. But in the end, he nodded and looked away from you. Both of you knew that you're lying, but neither of you wanted to talk about the lie more closely. - "I was thinking about playing some gee-tar. What about you bringing me that instrument and making me a cup of coffee before we go to sleep, Joel?" - You asked after a moment, having the man realizing how vulnerable you were at the moment. He could just call you out about the bullshit. Yet he didn't. Joel just smoothed your back with his palm, pulling you a bit closer.

"You don't drink coffee. Didn't the coma messed with your brain, baby girl?" - The man asked but slowly walked to the door. You just sighed, reminding him of sugar. He brought everything anyway - both the guitars, both the mugs with the coffee and some fruits you could both snack on. The first songs you've played were shaky and off the rhythm, your voice wasn't the best either, which had you cringe a lot.

The man was calming you down, reminding you to have patience and not to jump into things too quickly. The best moment of the night was when you played A-Ha together, Joel playing the instrument while you curled up in the rocking chair, which he brought for you from the cabin in the woods, and sang. When the conversation you two had slowly faded away, you caught yourself falling asleep as Joel was playing with his guitar, playing parts of various songs you didn't even know. He had woken you up an hour or so after, making sure you won't be too bitten by mosquitos.

The following day, the signal you were waiting for came - Dina ran to you while you were helping in the kitchen and the diner. She told you, very hastily, that you will take off the following day, two hours after midnight, and that you'll have a meeting point at the south breach. Jesse, who was authorized to spy on both you and Dina, along with Ellie and Joel, had to see it because of course, he had. It was quite logical when you had a shift in the kitchen at the same time.

"What are you two whispering about, birdies?" - The boy leaned between your heads. If you had to be honest, he was looking good with the apron and a crooked smile on his lips as he held the bowl with the yeast dough. After a smile while of looking at him, you gave him your typical chuckle, getting back to the vegetables in front of you.

"About your ass." - You answered innocently. At that, Dina joined you, leaned her ass into the counted next to your workplace. Her eyes looked at her ex-boyfriend's ass shamelessly. After a moment, her agreeing hum sounded next to your ear as both you and Jesse snickered. - "I mean, Y/N's not wrong. Maybe you'll finally have your luck with Bobby now you're single?" - Dina asked, offering you a hand to do a high five. The boy looked at you with an offense in his grinning face, running his tongue along the line of his teeth.

"All I said is that the lady has a nice bottom. It was at the Christmas party, there was a lot of eggnogs and I was drunk. Don't ever bring that up again. Deal?" - Jesse pointed the wooden spoon at the two of you. Dina and you behaved childishly quite often, but it was never too inappropriate or annoying. You know where to put the stop to the whole playing-around thing.

"I certainly can't promise that, Jesse." - "Me neither" - You both shook your heads and you started to cut the tomatoes again. You already cleaned and cut more than one big bag of them and there was still a lot remaining. And trust me, you were a lot in the kitchen since you got back from the Baldwin place. It was occurring because of two main reasons - Maria wanted to have you under control and you still weren't sure about somehow getting through the whole patrol process.

"I would miss this... If you'd were going to Seattle." - Jesse whispered, looking into the dough in front of him. Dina flashed her eyes at you and licked her lips swiftly. Jesse had to know that you were up to something and he even had to know what was that something. - "Thank God you're not that dumb." - Jesse gave you a shining smile over the shoulder, leaning back to the dough.

"Yeah, exactly. Thank God we aren't." - You repeated and watched Dina leaving as she pointed two fingers up to signal you the time you, her, and Ellie will meet up. Neither of you planned on sleeping that night - you decided to sneak out, walk at least five miles from Jackson, find a cover and sleep there. So it was special for you when you and Joel were getting into bed. Neither of you felt like sex, so you just told each other about your days as you laid down, preparing for some sleep. Just like the first time, he'll wake up and he'll be alone. That was almost poetic.

It was a repeating cycle - but this time, Joel won't find you wandering around the city. Sure, the man got a little suspicious when you didn't want to cuddle closer and you just laid there facing each other. While the man was already drifting off, or so you suspected, you were just laying there and memorized every inch of his face. The gray, maybe-too-long but still maintained haircut and trimmed beard, a bit crooked nose with a small scar in the middle, deep wrinkles on his forehead and two leading down from his cheeks - these were visible especially when he spoke or smiled at you. Your hand was itching to feel the nicely-shaped lips, slowly caressing away down to his throat to feel the rough skin with fading suntan. But you just laid there with tears in your eyes, fighting an urge to cry.

He was beautiful. He was. And you were leaving him just to make sure he was safe. What a fucking irony.

To your surprise, you had fallen asleep. When you woke up, you've just opened up your eyes and looked around, Joel wasn't in the bed. First, you thought you're late and that he maybe knew what you were planning on doing, but you exhaled slowly when you heard the water in the bathtub moving around. He was probably taking one of his late-night baths. He had tendencies to do that when he was sleeping poorly or when he had woken up in the middle of the night. But it urged you to act quickly.

You pulled a backpack from under the bed, checking that there are your gun and the knife. Quickly, you threw some sweatshirt and a few t-shirts to change on your journey, put some warm clothes on and sneaked downstairs to put the boots on. You were moving around swiftly and quietly to make sure Joel won't be suspicious - he had to hear you walking around the place, but there wasn't a single word coming from the bathroom, so you supposed you're safe.

Slowly, you took in a long breath as you palmed the doorknob, closing your eyes. - "Lord, please grant me your mercy and take care of Joel when I'm gone. And make sure hell forgive me over the time, deal?" - You prayed. You never went to the church and you, neither Fireflies nor your parents weren't religious people. You didn't know how prayers worked, what to say, or how to concept it. But it felt good to say something to the entity up there. And if there wasn't anything, you just felt good about saying it out loud.

Shit almost hit your pants when the dining room lit up suddenly and Joel leaned his shoulder to the doorframe. He didn't even have to say a word and you already knew he's pissed. He was clothed, just after a bath and his furrow, dear Lord, that was some nightmare fuel.

"You goin' somewhere?" - The man asked quietly, crossing his forearms on his chest. Slowly, your hand let the doorknob go. A quick cuss left your lips when you smoothed your wet hands on your thighs, taking in a deep breath. Jesus, you never felt so bad. You were busted, like five-year-old stealing candy from the cookie box. - "Joel..." - You put one of your palms up, trying to calm him down before he'd let the thunder fell on you.

"I asked you 'bout lettin' the whole Baldwin thing go and you looked me in my damned eyes and said 'yea'. Did you think that you're so unobtrusive, actin' like you hadn't an idea that I know what's up? You think you're so clever, huh? Jesse told me 'bout the small date you and Dina had in the kitchen." - Joel walked to you slowly and you could tell that you're just fucked up. There was no other way to put it. Joel busted your ass and probably, he told Maria, so you weren't going anywhere.

"Don't try to stop me, Joel. If you stop me now, I'll just sneak out later. All it would do would be setting Dina and Ellie alone, and if there'd be just the two of them..." - You started to talk frantically, but Joel's palms on your shoulders made you stop. He was looking you in the face with a slight furrow. When you wanted to wiggle out, his palm caught your cheek and the man made you look up at him.

"I am not stoppin' you. I told you, baby girl, that if you'd like to go after 'em, we will go after 'em together. I am disappointed and we'll need to talk about that later, but I won't be stoppin' you, nor Dina, nor Ellie. I just don't wanna lose you, 'kay?" - The man breathed out as the oxygen in his throat hitched. You put both your palms on his chest, looking him in the face. Your tongue tried to tell all the words you wanted to tell him, all the syllables you had inside your head, but nothing came out of your mouth.

Was there any sense in trying to talk Joel down from coming with you? The man had his head and he was stubborn, so you wouldn't stop him for shit. This was dangerous for him. Joel wasn't the youngest, his reflexes weren't that good either, and... Anything could go wrong. He could die. He could die for real. Slowly, you licked your lips, hugging the man. Sure, it will weird Ellie out to have Joel coming with you on another adventure. But... More eyes see more, more brains know more and more hands could do more, right? Ellie will find her way around it, you were sure of that.

"Took my revolver and the ammo I've had hidden for it with me. You're taking your bow and quiver, right?" - He whispered to your ear. Oh. OH. The bow and arrows. You would've forgotten it at home if Joel didn't bring it up. Because of the pressure around.

With a smile, you walked to the cabinet you kept your toys in, taking them out. - "You're secretly hoarding ammo without telling Maria about it? Where are the days when your ass didn't take any ammo with it on patrols?" - A question rang throughout the silent house, having Joel chuckle in response. - "You're the most paranoid person I know, Miller. But I love for that, God knows I do." - You walked back, putting the weapon on the table as you wrapped your hands your the nape of his neck. - "I love..." - Joel answered, but he was interrupted by the noises coming from the outside.

The subtle romantic moment was ruined by something going on on the street. Quickly, you walked to the window to look out of it - and your eyes widened horrifiedly when you saw Maria stomping right to your door, leading Dina and Ellie behind her. Fuck, she must've caught them earlier. And she looked so pissed that you felt your stomach tighten.

"Did Jesse told Maria about this?" - You asked Joel, quickly hiding your and his backpack, putting the arrows and the bow down from the table. It was weird enough to find you both dressed up for a stroll at two a.m., but when Ellie and Dina were busted already, you were busted too.

"No, the boy didn't tell her. He just wanted me to know 'cause he was worried you're gonna get yourself killed, that's what he told me." - Joel shook his head, already watching his sister-in-law stomping on the porch, knocking on the door. Well... Maria didn't knock. She almost broke the door in halves.

For a moment, Joel looked at you to see if you're calm enough and then, he finally opened up, a crooked smile playing on his lips. Ellie's eyes shot wide open when she saw him all ready as well, but there wasn't space for her to speak, so she just sent you a nod. And Dina? She looked the worst, like a small kid who waited for a slap. - "Hey. Wouldn't expect you here so late, Maria, howdy," - Your man started charmingly, bit the blonde woman just pushed him out of the doorframe, walking straight to the dining table.

"What happened?" - You whispered to Ellie. Before the girl answered, she licked her lips and shook her head, giving you a clear idea. She didn't know. But before she opened up her mouth, Maria pointed her finger into the wooden desk of the table.

"Sit down, all four of you. And don't test my patience." - She ordered quietly, but her voice hinted on how infuriated she was. The situation was wickedly hilarious - Joel, a man in his early fifties, you, and two girls around their twenties were getting bitched down like a band of kindergartners. And by the looks of it, Maria wasn't slowing down.

"Maria, I've headed to Seattle, I wish I could let it all go, but I can't. I have to bring these people to justice." - She started to read from a piece of paper in her palm, looking at you and Ellie specifically. - "Ellie was right. I can't let them get away with the stuff they've done to the poor girl and with the stuff they planned on doing. I just can't. What if they'd come back, attacking at us in full force? What's holding them back?" - She read the question mockingly, but let you all know she doesn't want to get an answer on that one. She licked her lips to progress with the letter.

"I know that at least one of the three girls will come after me. Assign patrols checking on their houses in the night, make them busy, take their guns, lock the guns and horses up, maybe lock all of them up?" - Maria was getting more and more infuriated just by reading the text. So Jesse didn't tell on you. Tommy had set to Seattle on his own, holy motherfucking love of Jesus Christ. That was just a dumb idea which sure will get him killed.

"Buy me some time so I can end this on my own terms. Love you always, Tommy." - She finished and leaned her palms into the table. - "Do you realize what this letter means? Any of you? He's gonna get himself killed." - Maria bent the paper in halves, taking in a long breath.

Ellie rolled her eyes and you could see her inflating her cheeks with anger. Each of you was in a different stage of anger at that moment. And Ellie's was most probably the most hot-headed and childish, but she spoke first nonetheless. - "I told you that you can stop this, Maria. We need to finish this. He should've taken us with him. You should've given us a group to go after those fuckers right away!" - The girl whispered recklessly, looking into the desk with tongue running over her front teeth. The blonde woman sighed loudly, rolling her eyes.

At that, Maria laughed cold-heartedly, looking at the girl with anger burning inside her eyes. Whatever was going on inside Maria's head, it was a real fight. Dina turned her head at you when you breathed out, shook your head, and lowered it down. This was your fault. Your fucking fault. Tommy had the feeling that he has to do it for you. The man could barely work and his arm still wasn't good either. This mission wasn't only a suicidal one, it was pure madness. - "Wish I could." - The old woman looked Ellie in the eyes rather daringly, as if she was daring the girl to do something.

"So, now what, Maria? You wanna lock us up inside our houses? Take away our guns? Will you make us... Busy?" - Ellie opposed and finally looked at Maria. This situation was extremely uncomfortable for everyone - while Ellie had full-on one on one argument with Maria, while the three of you, you, Dina and Joel, sat there in dead silence, each of you lost in your thoughts. But you still listened to the topic of the conversation, in case of Maria would try directly verbal-assaulting anyone else. Sure, she was just mad, but if this fight would go off the rails... Some rather nasty things could've been said. Some of which couldn't be taken back.

"Well, when you're asking me so nicely, I'd prefer that you'd both stay," - Maria sighed and looked at you and Ellie sitting next to each other. You two were definitely where this suicidal idea to go to Seattle came from, she was sure of that. You most likely wanted to protect Joel, which as cavalierish as it was crazy, and Ellie wanted to revenge you. At that, Ellie spangled on her feet, having an offended expression in her face. When she pointed her finger at maria, the woman lowered her head. - "That's not gonna fucking happen," - " I'd prefer that you'd both stay, but I know you better." - With that, Ellie shut up in surprise as Maria walked to the other half of the table, now looking at Joel and Dina.

"Are you going with them?" - She rose her eyebrows. The man didn't answer, he just nodded, and Dina let out an offended 'yeah' as if it wasn't obvious.

"What did you planned on doing? Just sneaking outta here? On foot? Huh?" - Maria made herself snicker ironically after hearing another yeah, this time from Ellie. You, you were impossible. Sneaking on foot out of Jackson and traveling to Seattle? In the cold and stormy spring that was coming? Sometimes, you were dumber than Maria thought. Everyone was silent as you watched Maria looking out of the window into the night neighborhood, taking in another deep breath. When she was sure she won't kill any of you on the spot, she turned back to the table, leaning into it and staring into everyone's eyes.

"I told the stable to let you out with Sadie and Shimmer. Grab some ammo too. And some food and sleeping bags." - At that, each of you shut up. And Maria started tearing up, so she closed her eyes for a moment to calm down.

"Thank you, Maria." - Dina whispered with true respect in her voice, watching the lady calming down by walking around Joel's dining room. But then, she looked at you and Ellie with a saddened smile. - "Just, uh, do me a favor and bring my dumbass husband home in one piece, please. And... When you come back from there, we won't be ever talking about it again. No Abby, no WLFs, no golf clubs, no cottage in the mountains. We'll pretend that it never had happened." - Maria sighed. Ellie started nodding as the first one as she went to hug Maria tightly to calm the woman down. Then you went to share the hug with them, having Dina joining in as the last one. Joel sat there and watched you with a sad smile.

"All right then." - Maria stepped aside, looking at the three of you. You were always together when you did something good, something bad or something crazy. And this, to Maria's surprise, checked every box. - "Get going, you're... The way to Seattle is long, even on horseback and you need as much daylight as you can get. And to your information, Jesse didn't tell me you're planning on leaving. It was Diego who heard it." - And with that, Maria walked out of the house with the letter in her hand, shaking hands and teary eyes.

You stood there for a little longer, not knowing how to react. And as usual, Ellie was first to break the awkward silence. - "Holy motherfucking shit. I can't believe it worked out." - She sighed and sat down for a little longer as you and Joel get to preparing your gear again. Dina scoffed ironically, leaning into the back of the chair.

"Not to be the one who's breaking it to you, but everything had fucked up as much as it could and Tommy with his fucked up leg and arm is currently MIA." - Well, that was one way to look at the situation as well.

"Don't worry 'bout him for now. He's a capable guy, I saw a lot of things he has done while he was a Firefly. Trust me, if someone should be worried, it's the fuckers in Seattle." - Joel answered at that statement and zipped his jacket all the way under his chin, controlling the stuff he picked up once again. Your backpacks were full of personal stuff, but once you'd get to the horses, you'll do some space management and it'll be good. - "Since when you're going, old-timer? I don't see this happening." - Ellie licked her lips, watching Joel's face with one of her stubborn gazes.

"Then open up your eyes, kiddo. If she's comin', I'm comin'." - The man looked at you with a smile and you smiled back. Both the girls were uncomfortable for a while, watching the two of you, but after a small while, Ellie nodded and clapped. - "'kay. Fine. Alrite. Maria's right. The earlier we go, the further we get, the sooner we can catch some sleep."

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silvanable · 4 years

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Tag Game - Get to Know Me

Answer the questions below and tag 11 people you want to know better!

i was tagged by @moody-typos and it looked like fun so i thought why not.

. • . • . • . • .

1. What do you prefer to be called name wise?

silv, silvy, or silvana. i don’t particularly mind as these are all technically the same. so all of them i guess are my preferred name.

2. When is you birthday?

june 26th!

i like to remark that’s the day the US legalized gay marriage in all 50 states back in 2015 so i was born to be gay. 🏳‍🌈🌈

3. Where do you live? (You don’t have to give city, you can give the state if you’re USA or country if you’re overseas)

US if the previous statement wasn’t obvious.

another hint: it’s hot and it rains too much here. good luck finding me~

4. Three things you are doing right now?

writing ( non-fanfic work ), listening to music ( FEEL NOTHING atm ), & working on headcanon requests from my inbox.

5. Four Fandoms that have your peak interest right now?

my hero academia, ikemen sengoku, mr. love queen’s choice, & castlevania. these are currently my most consistent hypes that won’t let me go.

6. How has this pandemic been treating you?

at first i thought it would be great but i’ve been stuck inside ( i literally have not been passed my mailbox or even near it ) for 3 months or so now. i’m ready for it to be over because i would like to enjoy my summer while i still have the opportunity.

overall i’m stressing myself out and unmotivated to do a lot of things.

7. A song you can’t stop listening to right now?

Contagious by NIGHT RIOTS, been obsessed with it since February of 2019.

but i also recommend:

Fashion Forward (Acoustic) by The Home Team

I Miss Having Sex But At Least I Don’t Wanna Die by Waterparks

8. Recommend a movie.

Birdbox. Sandra Bullock is in it ( reason enough for me ) it’s a great sort of horror/thriller movie that really builds suspense by your imagination. if you’re easily scared i do not recommend it because your mind will definitely work against you.

A milder movie ( that isn’t horror ) would be Mad Money. it is a hilarious movie about 3 women from entirely different backgrounds that work at and rob a high security bank ( and all for different reasons ). the characters are quirky and well put together.

both are on the US netflix but i’m not sure about anywhere else.

9. How old are you?

not old enough to drink yet. yet.

10. School, University, Occupation, Other?

i’m in university. i’m studying to become an accountant ( but so far my business classes have only taught me how to destroy the economy in my favor while jumping through legal loopholes oof ).

11. Do you prefer heat or cold?

definitely cold. i hate both if we’re talking weather but i can cope with cold. i tend to get even more tired in the cold and it helps me sleep ( hibernate technically ).

12. Name one fact about you that others may find unusual.

well... if i’m being honest, i have very horrible eyesight ( i’m almost completely blind in one eye ) and people seem more than a little worried when i tell them i can incapacitate a humanoid target from a 100 yards ( ~92 meters, at least ) and i have the target poster to prove it.

i won’t get into it but if you want to know how that poor poster is doing just let me know.

13. Are you shy?

relatively. if i know you, i’m the loudest damn person you know, or if it’s a matter of discussion, i tend to have a very powerful persona ( or so i’m told ).

generally i will not talk to people and keep to myself though. people make me nervous and i struggle to cope with anxiety so i don’t go out of my way to talk to people ( so i just end up sneaking glances if you pique my interest but i can’t say anything to you ).

14. Do you have preferred pronouns?

i prefer they/them, however, i still align with female attributes so she/her is legit too. whichever, i’m not picky about it.

15. Biggest pet peeve?

slow walkers. this might not be #1 but it’s definitely up there. i walk incredibly fast ( especially for a person with short legs ) and have long strides. if you’re in front of me and blocking my way, you can bet i’m going to mow you over. i will not slow down.

16. What is your fave ‘dere’ type?

the first one to come to mind was yandere and it’s probably true. it’s the mindset of the yandere that draws me in. if they’re written and played out well they become people who we’re teetering on the edge of becoming if we aren’t careful. i love that terrifying feeling of “i could be that if i just step wrong”.

17. Rate your life 1-10, 1 being really crappy and 10 being best it could ever be.

i really don’t want to do that, because i’m in an okay place and sometimes i’m in bad or good, but really it depends on the moments, people, and little messages that make it better. just depends on the time of day.

18. What is your main blog?

@moonsirens

haven’t honestly decided what i’ll do with it so it will probably just be a repost and dump?

19. List your side blogs and what they are used for.

one of them is private that i can’t tag & it’s used for roleplay stuff ( aesthetics, character files, images, etc ).

@spellbound-doodles which is my art blog i am still to chicken to post to. i should but sharing personal works, stories, & art is really hard for me ( a best friend had to make an instagram for my art for me to get me to start posting! )

20. Is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?

expect me to bother you about my dog and the horrible jokes my brother made that i absolutely have to share because they made me laugh so hard i cried.

also, footnote, i’m satan soooo-

but that’s a story for another time.

. • . • . • . • .

tagging : most people i’m vaguely familiar with have been tagged, so i guess whoever wants to snatch it up and give it a shot? i’ll tag you then-

#tag game #what's a silv

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citialiin · 4 years

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THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm. tagged by: @forseenclade thank you ! man i am so bad at doing memes. tagging: @blossomingbeelzebug @zhrets @lupichorous @dansiere yayayayayayayaya

My muse is: canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated [ z/iggy stardust is DEFINITELY not my original character, but 683 is, and every single part of how i rp ziggy from his backstory to his personality was made up by me. that being said, ziggy is still a character that exists in media. ]

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO. [ im pretty sure ziggy is tied with the thin white duke as one of b*wie’s most famous fictional personas? ]

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom? YES ? / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated? YES / NO / IDK. [ maybe a little overrated ]

Were they relevant for the main story? YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO.

How’s their reputation? GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. [ celebrity rock god of limitless talent vs inevitable overrated washup. most celebrities are polarizing anyways ]

How strictly do you follow canon? — there isnt much canon to go off of i think? the album barely even states if ziggy is an alien and b*wie himself got really wishy washy about it (sometimes saying z is a human who was contacted by aliens, he was an alien himself, etc). i dont think we know anything about him besides what he looks like (red hair / weird eyes / pale / “well hung” lmao) and he has a band called the spiders from mars, he plays the guitar left handed, he’s bisexual + androgynous, and he’s charming and popular with the teens but inevitably is a victim of his own ego. and he dies. that too. but that’s literally it! we know Nothing else about him. so i filled in all the gaps because my brain has worms. theres a little bit of the story that verges on fantasy (that he’s some sort of messiah messenger for “the infinites,” whatever the fuck THAT means, david) so i nix that because i prefer hard scifi. and theres one BIG part that i just ... deleted out of his canon, in that the world is ending in 5 years in his timeline, and he’s like ... aware of this ? but that’s dumb and confusing. i legit dont care anymore. my OC now.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals. — im so embarrassed i know i could be genuine and actually try but i have brain blockajjolajlakala33lak33klak333ak3jka3akjj323j3 i guess it’s like ... ziggy is truly the ultimate expression OF humanity because he reveals everything both wrong and right about the human condition, he literally embodies the best of humanity and the worst at the same time, he’s a really interesting critique on the idea of genuineness/earnestness vs commercalism in art, the perils of fame, and also how humans are so inherently corrupting? a lot of thematic stuff i like exploring is like what is innate to humans vs what is learned behavior, what are things that humans do naturally that ziggy mimics out of his desire to be like us? i think he has a really good story arc -- he went from being a literal nameless CLONE in a society full of pragmatic forward thinking science-oriented people to a sell out rockstar celebrity in a society of people that value individualism and self expression and art, but in the process completely lost his mind and himself and gave into the worst that humanity has to offer like rampant selfishness, drug abuse, self destructive tendencies, etc. characters changing is always interesting and ziggy truly changes for the worse -- but he is never just black and white, he was never good and then suddenly evil, he just was always the same person putting on different facades and trying to be himself by constructing an identity that maybe was who he wanted to be versus who he actually is. i dont know what im talking about. hes just an alien trying to be too hard to be human in all the wrong ways. i just like how “gray” ziggy is. he isnt good or bad, he can be very nice and he can be very mean, he’s overtly showboating confident but at the same time deeply afflicted with self-consciousness (why tf else would anyone be So obsessed with how they present themselves?). hes an icon of individualism but also commercialism. he’s freakishly alien but is almost more human than humans themselves. he struggles as lot in his head -- which makes for interesting writing, i guess !! Im so emabrrased im not going to go back and read what i wrote so if i typoed dont look at me

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?). — i think ziggy comes across as really mean and nothing else. his horrible bitchy rudeness comes across as hee hee hoo hoo sassy isnt he a rascal when it’s supposed to be more like ... he’s so far gone into the celebrity delusion he’s conflated aggressive rudeness with charmingness because no one told him otherwise and everyone worships him to the point where he’s just given into the delusion that he can do no wrong. i think theres the general simplification problem that happens with a lot of fictional characters, it’s easy to see him as just a whacky sassy glittery quirky rockstar when i guess it avoids the inherent tragedy of like ... everything else about him. his totally fake and false sense of identity built up from superficial things like fame and labels and stardom. maybe my version of ziggy is just too weirdly depressing and sad when i know his original iteration wasn’t quite so ... grim. im not very sure tbh.

What inspired you to rp your muse? — hmmm ... a lot of things! i just really got into b*wie stuff in early 2019, i’ve ALWAYS loved aliens and sci-fi, and i was really shocked that db sets up such great visual storytelling potential but does it through music. i just really liked ziggys “story” and i like any chance to think about aliens so i just got invested into piecing together a little backstory for him using, like, the cumulative knowledge of literally every other piece of science fiction ive ever consumed in my life. this was summer 2019 when i was making initial pitches for my thesis film, and so i just randomly decided to pitch “animated version of ziggy stardust” as one of the potential ideas. shockingly everyone liked it a lot and so did my professor who thought it was really cool, and then i just ended up sticking with the character and working on him for an entire year. ziggy became my hobby but also my homework. he was such a fun character because everything about him was interesting to me and i had just enough source material to have a starting point but so much room to take him in any direction i wanted to.

What keeps your inspiration going? — honestly, yooooou guyssssss. i have some really amazing fwends that ive met thru here .... and some of our dumb stupid stories have literally become NOVEL length. it just self generates inspiration because you realize the limitless amount of stories you could tell with this one single character when your character enters his story or he enters their story and etc. etc. ive drawn endless amounts of comics and stuff for him ... ziggy is just so endlessly interesting ... cringe be cringed bro but recently (i know this sounds dumb bear with me or die.) ive kind of realized a lot of how i rp z comes as some metaphor for the experience of being an asian immigrant/being asian in the US -- his home “culture” is a lot stricter than the rampant selfish individualism of the usa (he only lives in the uk and usa, so he thinks the whole planet is like this), he’s dissuaded from standing out from his community and his selfishness becomes a community burden rather than a personal flaw, and when he does come to earth, he goes through such awful culture shock, literally nothing makes sense to him and everything is Different. and while some things are different in a Nice way, something things are different in an Awful way, and he’s given the option between losing his true personal identity as an atominan and giving it up to be a human. the allure of being a human is a little too much but losing yourself like this is traumatic, in a way. obvs like ... a little silly and definitely not something that i actively intended to put into his story arc, its just something that fell into place cuz i guess i worked so closely with my own personal experiences and feelings of “alienation” (pun intended) to try to understand how he would feel being a literal alien an shid. its cathartic to write about him. but he also has a lot of my own personal interests just thrown in -- 70s fashion, scifi, science, tryhard implications about human nature, art history, whatever dumb nonsense i get into

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice? YES / NO / SOMETIMES?

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO [ i would prefer information to spring up organically in the story but cuz threads always get dropped i end up just telling people outright. i didnt want anyone to know his home planet/his old name but barely anyone writes enough with ziggy to get to that point to reveal it (i legit managed to do it organically Once) so i just had to write it in a post lmao orz ]

Do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO [ wrote a ton of drabbles ! drew a ton of comics! ]

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO

Are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO / I DUNNO?

Are you confident in your writing? YES / HAHA NO.

Are you a sensitive person? YES / NO. / IDK ?

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal? — definitely! like i said ... my version of ziggy ended up being the protag of my thesis film and for 1 yr straight his characterization, backstory, design, and even how i wanted to animate his fucking movements (ziggy stardust timing charts.) were beaten to death in a classroom environment, torn apart and rebuilt into something better. had i stayed with what i originally wanted to go with, ziggy would be so different than how i write him 2day. amazingly my pre production professor is a literal two time emmy award winning storyboard artist and animator so he definitely helped me design him (my version of ziggy is meant for ... a cartoon, obviously, not real life) and give him a better backstory? and my post production professor is a retired disney animator who worked on hercules and a bunch of old disney channel shows? had i gone wah wah wah i dont want to hear ur critiques i wouldnt have made him better. if you ever think ziggy seems inconsistent or poorly written ... tell me !! i literally major in ... animation. cartoons. entertainment. my job is to entertain you. if you are not entertained, there is a problem. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED ????

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character? — I LOVE QUESTIONS? i love ... answering questions ... if you ask me something ill come kiss you.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why? — sure! i dont know why that would happen, though, because i mean ... he’s an OC. but i gues someone could be like “i feel like this is incongruous to things you’ve previously established in his character” or somethin

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it? — i feel like a lot of b*wie stans would find my version of ziggy weird but i mean thats fine! i guess my goal is to have a well written character, not necessarily an accurate version of ziggy

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it? — if you hate MY version of ziggy thats fine but if u hate ziggy stardust in general (like the bowie concept) then u need some taste what the fuck is cooler than a egomaniac genderless bisexual rockstar alien with red hair? nothing. go back to watching your CW shows you dirty filthy normie

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors? — yes! dm me though. dont clown me on the dash like that. i usually write your replies 12 AM - 4 AM so it’s expected.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun? — hmmm ... maybe! i do like to talk to people and i am VERY nice, trust me, if youre ever sad ill do everything i can to make you feel better. but im quiet! i dont really reach out to people and i tend to just keep to myself. im not very social or extroverted at all haha i barely can make ooc posts without feeling like god’s coming to beat my head in with a brick. im sitting here at 5:30 AM with this meme feeling like if i post it i will die (BUT I MUST)

#a lot of it is under the readmore because these always get so long and mine is long long long long long long long long long long long #ooc #KEEP YOUR 'LECTRIC EYE ON ME ; queue #and thakn you for tagging me ! i like to mkae Words

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