I know you've probably gotten this a couple times. But as you're probably aware, the original creator of Vantablack was diagnosed with DID, where Vanta was present as a fictive alter. Vanta, alongside other alters, were the ones grooming and sexually abusing minors and adults alike. I won't say the host, or the original creator you knew, was innocent, but most of the problems arose from his alters.
Being that Vanta was a major abuser, and possibly a lot of his victims are becoming aware of this revival of project, is it possible that you could make and design your OWN Ink/Nightmare fusion, to spare them from triggering content? It would be in theirs, and your, best interests to consider doing so. Don't subject people to a sore reminder of their traumas. You've already removed most of the other characters created by the original creator, so why not the one who was centred in the drama surrounding the grooming and abuse thanks to a fictive of him? Please. As a friend to a few who were victims, I just want to ask if you hear me.
I do hear you. And I recognize the victims that we're affected by J's actions. But I also recognize the grey complexity of this current situation, at least in how it pertains to myself and my decisions here.
I see Vanta (the character) and Vanta (the fictive) as very separate in nature; one of them is a real person who is responsible for their own actions. I've never properly met the fictive and I know very little about him besides the news of what he did (and honestly I'm very grateful for that). Perhaps the closest I've ever gotten to interacting with him was when J had a hostile meltdown in front of me after announcing my pull of my work from the old project (I was later told that it was Vanta who had that meltdown, but I'm unable to confirm it).
I was never groomed. But that does not mean that I don't hold a large share of trauma that stemmed from my interactions with J. My memory of my time with him is foggy, perhaps repressed, but it's clear to me that he's left a sizeable negative imprint on my psyche-- if my innate fear towards him (even before hearing the news of what happened) is anything to go off of.
I do know that, at least for a while, I considered him to be my only friend. And knowing what I know now -and the fact that I am the same age as one of the victims- that scares me in ways I cannot even begin to describe.
Does that make me a victim in some sense? I'm unsure. There is no simple or straight answer here, as there is with a lot of what I am and will be talking about. I don't want to force a simple conclusion out of all of this. I don't want to make this situation black and white: because it simply isn't. That would ultimately be a disservice to me fully processing the events that did occur.
(Ironically enough, J wasn't the one out of the admins to leave me with the most trauma, but that's its own complicated story that I will save for another day.)
Now Vanta, as a character, I still hold dear to my heart. I was responsible for designing him (both his initial and updated designs), as well as co-writing and coming up with major parts of his character. I see Vanta no different to any character I created entirely on my own, seeing as I was the second largest contributor to his character. It sort of just made sense to me to take him under my wing after what happened. For better or for worse, I can't bring myself to replace him. Perhaps I'm just stubborn or too sentimental for my own good.
I love Vanta, in spite of everything J has done. And I want to give people the chance to enjoy Vanta without all that horrific baggage-- and that includes myself.
I am willing to make an accommodation or two, however. As a compromise, I am willing to give Vanta a redesign (no drastic changes, unfortunately) as to further dissociate him with his past iterations. I also will aim to give my own spin to Vanta's personality to some extent. It isn't much, but it is something I am willing to do if it helps.
If people are still uncomfortable with Vanta (especially victims), I certainly don't blame them. That being said, it is their job to curate their online experience to best suit their individual needs, whether that's ignoring posts, blocking tags, or even unfollowing me entirely. I'll respect that decision, as I ask that they respect my decision in turn, whether they agree with it or not.
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I am thankful that you were able to approach me about this in a respectful manner. I applaud you for that. It's nice to be able to have a civil discussion about tricky topics such as this, as many are quick to be reactionary towards things they don't agree with.
If you have more to say/ask and would like to, anon, my DMs are open.
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For in-lore storytelling, do you prefer referring to our main boy as Tyler or Clancy? Is Clancy just the character Tyler plays in the lore or do you view them as separate characters?
Or is the name Clancy just a penname Tyler coined to hide his true self from the bishops? As in, Clancy is just a name Tyler hides behind in his writings but even to the Bishops, his name stays Tyler?
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