#the only ones who are canonically In Love (and fucking lmao)

[withacapitalp]

It's official lads Eddie Munson has a type

It's not men. It's not women. It's not even both.

His type is Rich Kid, and he's gonna die mad about that.

#literally #LMAO #Anyways #Bi Eddie truthers how we feeling tonight? #I for one feel wonderful #bc guess what #canon doesn't fucking matter #books are books #shows are shows #do whatever you want w characters #but hey maybe lay off of the bi/panphobia #or think for two seconds #bc someone can have a femme love interest and not be straight #imagine that #woah #ANYWAYYYYYS #im here if anybody wants to not be bombarded w book stuff this is the only thing imma post about it #originally this said his type was jokc #but who knows if this new girl is a jock #but Chrissy and Steve are both rich kids so

[themyscirah]

Vanessa didn't even die and yet her story is still sadder and more fucked up than jtodd's. He wishes he was on her level

#may be a controversial one but i dont care this is my house #dont think there are enough of you to get hate over this anything #anyways no she didnt die. she wasnt killed by voter poll. but like the stuff that fucked her up was so much more real than a psycho clown #like im sorry but what is “you get beat up and die” to essentially getting taken and having the bad guys confirm to you that everything you #thought about yourself in middle school was true and everyone thinks youre ugly and worthless and not special and no one loves you. and then #ofc the medical torture. like im sorry but one of these things IS worse than the other imo #especially as the teen girl in the wonder woman comic like jesus christ #and while of COURSE the stuff about diana not loving her and all that is NOT true its something we see her struggle with as insecurity for #years beforehand. and then dc goes and brings her back into continuity in the past few years only to basically say “yeah wonder woman DIDNT #care about her! what a loser to think so and get all worked up about it! abt a vers of her who only has the name in common #like she wasnt dianas baby freaking sister with 100+ appearances #blah #vanessa kapatelis #anti jason todd #she also literally did the red hood arc before he did #with the whole attacking the successor and everything #yet another woman for him to steal from lmao #(this is mostly a joke. i dont think anyone making anything about jtodd canon or otherwise even knows what a wonder woman comic is but the #comparisons are still there.)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

current favorite thing about Psych: Shawn and his on-again off-again unofficial sometimes boyfriend Despereaux

#watching the art theft episode and man #shawn is just so bbg around despereaux its hysterical #ok psych reboot ft. things id change #uhhh id make it canon that shawn and despereaux fucked thanks for coming to my ted talk- #despereaux does Anything and shawn is all sparkly eyes amazed heart emoticons- #no no ok ok this is the dynamic in my head #yeah they fucked but despereaux was soooo over it once they parted ways #but shawn is like. That clingy guy after a one night stand who thinks that Had Something #yk? am i making sense? its almost 5 am i wanted to be asleep two hours ago #absolutely unprompted #LMAO DESPEREAUX JUST FAKED GETTING BLOWN UPPPPP #shawn is Devastated lmaoooooo #i love how they're all like 'spencer im sorry for your loss' LIKKEEEEEE cmon this shit writes itself #OMGGGG LMAO DESPEREAUX LEFT SHAWN MOST OF HIS STUFF IN THE WILL READINGGGGGG #'shawn was despereaux's only Male friend' okkkkkk ok ok ok #LMAOOO SHAWN IS DOING THE MANIC 'hes not dead!!!' THEORY THNGGGGGG #yes bby follow that hunch. be insane over this. get that art thief dick #'death by diabetes. i kid! he exploded' NEW FAVORITE QUOTE woody you are an Icon #nooo bs this is literally the fruitiest shawn has ever been and he has been Fruity on this show #cary elwes has chemistry with Everyone i stg #'i am giving this speech To Him' (shawn about the eulogy) mannnnnn MANNNNNNN #SHAWN IS DELUSIONAL <3 I LOVE THIS EPISODE ITS EVERYTHING #his. his first name is pierre. LMAO #SHAWN IS HAVING A PUBLIC BREAKDOWNNNNNNN #sorry sorry i love this show. its so stupid its great

[caimitos]

saw a post about projecting your ethnicity onto a character and started missing vespa ilkay. so so bad

#pov u grow up in a 3rd world country(/planet) where healthcare workers are exported by the thousands like cheap produce to richer countries #it's your ticket out of poverty as long as you can deal with the loneliness the separation from everyone you know the discrimination etc #ive never talked about my hc that vespas mother was one of them sending money every month visiting every couple of years until it just stop #like why return to the swamps when youre doing fine working on a richer planet w much better living conditions #cost of living rises every year. sending home a % of your salary used to be enough to support your husband and daughter and then it isnt #you know how it goes #vespa is also dead set on this path until ranga realizes that hemorrhaging healthcare workers leaves them with little to none of their own #students on scholarships or in community/state universities are bound by return service agreements and are forbidden to leave the country #until theyve rendered a few years of work on ranga to pay back their tuition + as a really shitty solution to the brain drain problem #this is real in my country btw but my professors say a lot of ppl do break their rsa's and fucked off to work in other countries LOL #our state unis can barely afford decent facilities they do nottt have the budget to chase down their own alumni in other countries! #but the mental image is a bit funny #vespa ilkays first crime: tinakasan ang rsa #i do also think it lines up with her having a network of med friends everywhere in the galaxy (heart of it all) you kind of go into pre/med #expecting most of your classmates to leave to work in other countries eventually. mine are aiming for the usa / uae / europe / japan etc #anyway whether vespa breaks her rsa or not she leaves ranga asap decides to switch careers and the rest is history #i also deeply love the fact that she's superstitious i'm very sad it wasn't highlighted more (i've only heard s1-3) #as someone who did grow up in a rural area and went to more albularyos/folk healers than doctors in my childhood. (they never failed me) #lots of folk illnesses (ex. balis; pasma) local medical superstitions (dont eat noodles in hospital; youll have a really toxic shift) etcc #theres also a lot of potential in tying her past as a rangian + med student + assassin to me idk how to word this properly #being raised on cautionary tales of not to touch/disturb anything in the swamps then being given free reign to poke & prod at things in her #lab classes (now with the proper ppe)....she was having so much fun with the curemother prime too lmao #years of walking hanging bridges docks boathouses in ranga etc gave her great balance & stealth #cracking open alien shellfish in the swamps to cutting open bodies for studying then for assassination.... #I MISS HER SO MUCH BALIK KN SAKEN 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #i get why most people + the canon focuses on her being an assassin bc people find that cooler i guess #but vespa being a swamp girl > 3rd world med student > assassin is so personal To Me. the whole pipeline. eugh. #skl.txt

[sapphire-weapon]

every time i scroll past pics or gifs of leon from death island, the first thought in my head is always

“wow he’s really lost weight”

and not in like a... “good for him”/”he looks good” kinda way

in a

“dude is he okay” kind of way

like especially this official render of him

he looks like shit. it’s not just his arms, either. his hips, thighs, and waistline all look really small (for him).

he’s supposed to be 37-38 in this movie. he looks like he’s in his late 40s/early 50s.

and then a little voice in the back of my head pipes up and is like

“he’s an ALCOHOLIC. at this point in his life, over half of his daily caloric intake comes from whiskey, you fuckin idiot”

and then i’m like “oh. oh yeah.”

and that’s probably why the layers and jackets almost never come off post-RE4 lmao RE6 is the most healthy he’s been in the years following RE4, because he actually had, like. a real friend in the months leading up to that game in adam benford. but then leon has to shoot him in the face and it’s back to the whiskey for him.

#resident evil #leon kennedy #i maintain my stance that leon is aging the worst out of all of the mainline RE cast #and chris used to be a fucking smoker canonically #maybe still smokes sometimes idk it's unclear #but leon is like #canonically and visually wasting the fuck away #and the only person who ever cares enough to say anything to him about it is chris #but chris is also an emotionally stunted gorilla #and so those conversations just turn into baby bitch fights #and leon's too much of a myopic drunk depressed sack of shit to realize that chris's little tantrums are actually his love language #but literally no one in his life cares more about him than chris redfield does #and leon's too stupid to fucking see it lmao

[fluffypotatey]

*staring deeply at my dr. geyer & liam fic* ........what if i just said fuck canon?

#canon compliant who???? #this was just supposed to be a character study #a simple and nice outsider pov that touched on liam's relationship with his parents #and his emotional turmoil with keeping secrets from his loved ones #we saw it when he was struggling with keeping a distance with Mason #so my smart (dumb) ass thought: let's do the parents! bc why the fuck not! #it's be nice #like a 5 times david geyer noticed something and the 1 time he couldn't deny the truth kind of shit #NOPE #that's not where this fic is going anymore lmao #cutesy one-shot who???? short little fic series when????? #you may not see me but my laughter is the only thing keeping me from descending into insanity #anyway #fic mayhaps will diverge from canon after i'm done with the s5 portion of it (bc SOMEhow i can't stop writing about s5?????) #teen wolf #liam dunbar #dr geyer #fic #writing #woes of a foolish fic writer #when is a fic writer on their last thread of sanity? when they toe the line of staying faithful to canon or just diving into the deep end

[trashpremiium]

deeply enamored by the fact every character pair my partner and I play in roleplay games boils down to "deeply serious and awkward character who doesn't like people and silly goofy character trying their absolute best to crack them (morally ambiguous) (one or both might have committed atrocities) (queer) (may or may not be in love depending on your view of 'in love' and it's proximity to romance)"

#i'm thinking about our damn murder mystery characters from last night (friends bday murder mystery party) #the fucking..... silly goofy little guy (whore coded) who is also a serial killer #and the police psychologist working on the case that cares enough about them to say they're innocent #even after knowing damn well they did it #and leigh and jonah are a less morally ambiguous version of this #(i mean. jonah did commit murder. but that was under extreme duress) #and then perse and blight #who are funny bc they're the first of our character pairs #the only ones who are canonically In Love (and fucking lmao) #and they're switched from our usual dynamic #of me playing the serious one and her playing the goofy one #anywho #i'm posting on tumblr dot com because i've already spammed all my friends #and i don't wanna be annoying <3 #zephyr talks #dnd posting

[4giorno]

underappreciated thing from the stuffpack reveal: they only said they were incorporating "nordic" design. they didnt say scandinavian 💖

#you KNOW its only bc there are finnish ppl in the team lmaoooooo #i dont trust americans NOR swedes and norwegians to not use nordic and scandinavian interchangably #hjffjdjdjf trying everything to ignore how sad it makes me that im not looking forward to todays gi livestream or the next version #like do you know how soul crushing it is to not be excited abt the game you love the most and dedicate everything into lol #also if one more person tries to put colorblind wrio on my screen i will throw my phone down the stairwell LMAO #you are literally just as annoying as the fans who say blind ppl cant look in the direction of a person sitting next to them 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 #at least the ppl who dont see him as blind (which like congrats canon is with you) dont make weird mental gymnastics hcs #bc they dont want to ignore the teaser weirdness but also dont want it to be too inconvenient for their yaois #.................... ANYWAY that got out of hand bye now #actually kidding people also need to fucking stop calling arle a mama(bear) like why are yall so weird #we know she uses masculine titles like father and king #rlly disappointed to see this behavior even from a great youtuber with smart videos #and the quotation marks are literally just for us the audience for our clarity (even tho i think its dumb) #for example the term king is not in quotations bc we already have the clarifying quotations for father #the characters dont say it any differently or bend the sentences in stupid ways #so you should stop being weird too :)

[marypsue]

not to be a horrible shipper all over your plotfic but what would the ships look like in your ageswap au?

The sample I posted does rather invite the question!

I should put out there, as a general rule, I'm not all that interested in Mike/Will and I don't have plans to write it anywhere. I don't really vibe with it, generally, and I believe I've mentioned previously (but maybe only in tags) that I really hate the way the Duffers conceived of and have been handling the possibility that Will might be gay. And many of the ways parts of the fandom have acted in response. I get that it's important to some people, and I don't want to rain on anybody's parade, but I've seen so much bad behaviour from the showrunners all the way down that it's pretty firmly put me off.

With that said, though. This fic was undertaken before I'd had much exposure to the fandom, and also, the roleswap plays...well, a role. I'm a sucker for a good triad relationship, especially the Monster Hunting Trio, and in this version of things, that's Mike and El and Will. So this is probably the only time you're ever going to see me writing reciprocated romantic feelings between Mike and Will. It's just that El is also there. And the entire context of their previous relationships with each other has changed. It feels different. I don't know. I'm operating on vibes, here.

Also because of the roleswap, this is one of those rare places where I'm not mashing Steve and Nancy and Jonathan's faces all together. Nancy and Jonathan are the Hopper and Joyce of this fic, and Steve is the Karen Wheeler. He'll be fine in his loveless marriage while the other two are off having fantastic post-saving-the-world sex. Maybe he'll have an ill-advised affair in the future. Who can say.

(Also Nancy and Barb had a brief on-again-off-again fling post-Nancy's-divorce, which has been over for some time as of the action taking place. Long enough for Barb to find a more stable relationship with the other local lesbian...)

I'm pretty sure that's it, as far as romance goes. Apart from the teen squad, it's pretty secondary to the plot in season 1, and I'm sticking with that. (Also, I need lots of time and space to fully mine the hilarity of Steve being Mike's literal actual father.)

#chatter #ships. plots. triggers. character deaths. whether there will be a banana appearing in a scene. it's all fair game #so long as everybody's respectful about it i love talking about fic whatever shape that takes #and i absolutely don't mind giving warnings or heads up if there's something you're particularly concerned about appearing #(or not appearing) #also it's genuinely nauseating how people want to give the duffers backpats for taking the stephen king route #and using their fiction as an excuse to use every slur they know #'oh the one who's been the target of vicious violent homophobia the whole time is the Only Gay One' try the fuck again boys. #(i have not forgiven them for what they did to robin as soon as she was Canonically Into Girls) #sorry I have. a lot of feelings on this topic. #i'm also most interested in reading will as aro-ace and the duffers' bullshit has only made me double down on that #but i don't want to talk about it like i'm only doing that reading out of spite because i do genuinely think it's interesting in itself #so if i'm going to talk about that i'll do it in a separate post #bc I also don't want to imply that it's an either-or and you can Only have One True Sexuality Headcanon for a character #(they're fictional your honour. this stuff depends on the reader and can also differ in context.) #(like how in the context of this one AU i'm interested in a triad relationship i won't be writing in any other contexts) #also I absolutely don't want to fight anybody for the dubious honour of getting shittily canonized by the duffers' bad takes lmao #'is it/will it ever be canon' is the least interesting metric by which to measure a ship/headcanon/etc to me

[righteousruin]

listen,, bane will try and warn you too ,,,his longest sexual partner was bird and he developed no romo for him whatsoever, he’s probably still in that cargo hold having venom withdrawals because Bane never went back for him

#that's a lie they worked together again in conquest which is post-reboot klasdj #is there any canon proof that they were banging? no. But I'm right. #no one can convince me bird wasn't getting railed #he loved bane so much he was always the one to break bad news to him he was always the one worried about how much venom he was taking #bird is the only one of the crew who ever talks back and raises his voice to bane #he was worried about him taking venom again after he kicked it #he was worried about bane upping his dosage #and bane fucking LEFT HIM TO ROT ASJDNKL #T W I C E #RIP Bird klsdja #he jabbed him with a stronger blend and went 'go fight azrael lmao i wanna see how good this works' #and then when he was going through withdrawals bane just knocked him down and left him on the floor cold as ice man #bird taught him to read trogg defended him as a child zombie helped raise him and all three men were abandoned when they failed bane #bane is bad at caring about most things but he really struggles to find affection for other men #this is largely because he grew up among the absolute worst of them #bruce and the six are the closest he gets to investing in the emotional states of other men #headcanons #ooc

[kalloway]

The goofiest movie in the Resident Evil series by a landslide is Resident Evil: Apocalypse

in this essay I will-

#delete later #it is so over the top ridiculous and cliche af to a point i love watching it to make myself feel better cuz it always makes me laugh #with hits such as: #A canon character asking the ‘OC’ in the movie-verse ‘who the fuck are YOU?’ after she saves their asses via motorcycle entrance #*WHIP SOUND EFFECTS* #for literally every single hit and swing Alice does #and a finale involving what is essentially a battle royale 1v1 where everyone just stands and watches them fight #the best oart is this movie is absolutely not trying to be funny at all but it takes its own seriousness to another level #another dumb fun part I laugh at is this one aerial view of Raccoon City where... you see a CIBC building LMAO #(a Canadian bank in an American city? goofy af) #like usually they try to mask the fact they film american cities in toronto a lot but they barely tried in this movie #im sorry i rewatch these movies so often it’s almost embarrassing 🙈 #there’s *parts* that I really like? like... cinematography-wise? or theme wise? #but it absolutely REEKS of ‘OC-insert’ and i don’ even know much about the games #idk if Alice qualifies as a Mary Sue *technically* because she *does* have flaws but BOY OH BOY #i shouldn’t keep blabbing about this cuz I will be here and bore y’all for ages about it afagdhhfhs #THERE’S SO MUCH TO NITPICK AND POKE FUN AT #the only people i know who unironically *love* these movies is... my parents - my mom especially #but she knows literally nothing about the games so when i told her about them she was shook to find out... Alice isn’t a canon character? #so im p convinced 99% of people do not like these movies and thus it’s fair game to rip on them as much as I do 8) #one last thing before i post this and probably delete later: #tfw u hand a character a gun and they say ‘idk how to use this’ and the advice u givethem is just... ‘hit them in the head’ #like Jill no u didn’t even check the safety in that thing before handing it to her #I REALLY WISH THEY’D JUST MAKE A MOVIE ADAPTATION OF OUTBREAK INSTEAD LIKE #IT’S PERFECT FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS #GAH okay okay im done now

[pain-suffering-even]

Hey um... 👉👈 do you have any other... uh... religious trauma hcs? Specifically for Izawa?!?! I definitely won't go feral if you post some :'3

hm... i don't have anything off the top of my head for him, but i'll whip up something real quick. i already have a few head canons for him, which i'll just mix into this, but i'll try and keep it as plain as possible for anyone to add on/be able to input what they think <3

content warning for religion/religious trauma and mention of oc character death and internalized homophobia/transphobia (very brief mention)

i would guess he's about 20, maybe 21 now - so he would be young when the gates appeared, 10 or 11. around this time he would maybe start leaning a bit harder into his faith since he's young and is terrified about what is happening. not to mention he would also be reawakened as an S ranker

for about several years, he'd ask god to protect his sister and his family - while he doesn't have a good relationship with his dad, he still sees him as a human being and values his life, and his step-mom has always been kind to him and gave him a sister, and later on, a brother

(if you really wanted to add in angst, his step-mom or step-sister could die in a gate break related incident - that could be the thing that really breaks his faith)

there are things that happen in canon, tragic incidents known world-wide because of the sheer amount of death and destruction. Kamish, Tokyo's Red Gate Incident (not canon; i whipped it up for goto ryuji's backstory), and all around any tragic stories involving people being lost or dying in gates would continuously shake his faith

coupled with the teenage angst hormones, his outlook on religion might do a 180 as he gets older - while he still believes in god/a higher power, its clear whatever he's praying to doesn't value human life

around this time he would be attempting to move out on his own, since his home life would be getting progressively shittier with time, only making him more and more frustrated

he would definitely feel guilty as well, because as an S ranker, he can definitely stop all of this death, but he can't do anything because he's still technically a child

(also - i headcanon ippei as being born intersex, which i know is out of left field, so i'm just going to mention it briefly - his gender/sex/all that would cause conflicted feelings about his faith as well, because he wants to trust god, but he also feels as though he's wronged him by being born the way he was - internalized homophobia/transphobia and all that)

in the present, he would probably hold grudges against god for not being there or not intervening. he might sit down for a prayer out of instinct/as a last resort before a tough gate or something similar - it would be tough for him to break old habits, as much as he doesn't like it

so... there you have it! growing up close to god, feeling betrayed and abandoned when shit got real, yet still reluctantly believing in god and praying/talking to him despite also feeling anger and resentment towards him. (and, an optional splash of internalized homophobia and transphobia or a dear family member dying due to a gate for maximum angst)

#tw // religion #head canons #solo leveling #only i level up #mentions of other characters #long post #izawa ippei #start rambling/ #phew... wrote this in one sitting so i hope its coherent lmao #just for you anon!!! hope you like it #god i love getting asks... makes my fucking day... if youre reading this i promise #im desperate for interaction in this fandom #and i will roll with just about anything #will i be good at it??? who knows! probably not! #anyway... ippei my beloved #fun fact. im still writing out the past project fic and hes the one giving me the most amount of trouble writing it #literally everyone else is done but whenever i write something for him im unsatisfied with it and have to start over #ok ok ok. im talking to much. anon i genuinely hope you enjoyed i tried my best #yall feel free to send me whatever asks are on your mind i will entertain them as best i can because. brain ROT #hope your crops are watered etc etc #/end rambling

[maddy-ferguson]

byler tumblr is a crazy crazy place because why do people get booed for disliking some stuff in canon. isn't that idk normal in fandoms

#you know that quote from the last black man in san francisco #you don't get to hate it unless you love it #there's parts of it i hate because i love the rest and just wish it was better #and it's not like the show would be better if i was the one writing whatever i'm just me but ykwim #isn't that normal. am i crazy #even if/when byler's canon and everything in that area makes sense there's still things i'm gonna hate about the show (and about the way #byler came to be...maybe not hate but dislike) #like i get where you're coming from because sometimes the way people see characters is skewed because they hate the direction the show took #but i also don't get it because yeah. people dislike certain storylines lmao #i mean the only storyline i REALLY disliked in season 4 was...russia...and that's very common and an acceptable thing to hate on here i #think. but even then i'm sorry i don't just dislike it i hate it like with a PASSION i can't even tell you how much i hate it it taints the #whole show in my eyes and sure i think season 5 is gonna be great i hope it is but i can't trust the people who came up with that to come u #with something I'M gonna love in s5. i hope they do though #also season 4 will never be LOVED by ME because the episodes are two hours long which is just annoying #i mean i really like it. i love parts of it. i love the themes and what it has to say. the season as a whole though... #the last episode was 140 fucking minutes long and we got a two days later time skip right in the middle of everything #you will just never see me pretend i love everything #the byers were sidelined and we got russians under a mall #and like i say: brf slt

[a-hazbin-reader]

love the chaotic-ness of platonic alastor and reader of your posts!! the way you write him is more canon compliant but that makes it even more GREAT. can i req platonic alastor (+maybe rosie as a trio?) with overlord!reader. they just talk shit about the Vees and stuff lmao and do it openly on his radio show. hang out at rosie’s. maybe alastor gets reader to support the hotel too and everyone’s to alastor is like THEM?? You know THEM??? alastor’s like yeah lol we blow stuff up every tuesday and broadcast it where you at

OVERLORD PODCAST OVERLORD PODCAST OVERLORD PODCAST-

Alastor X Reader X Rosie Headcanons

❌️Romantic

✅️Platonic

TW: Alastor and Rosie cannibalism

Description: 👆⬆️

The three of you are very busy demons who have demanding jobs so getting together doesn't happen as often as you'd like

But when you get together??? It's almost like you're all a bunch of gossiping old women instead of powerful deadly overlords

Rosie brings the snacks(bring your own if you don't want people meat), Alastor provides the venue, and you pick the topic of discussion

The first podcast was entirely an accident, Alastor forgetting he was on air when you and Rosie suddenly burst in

ALASTOR YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED

He gets so sucked into what you're saying that he forgets about his radio show and everything the three of you are saying is being broadcast live

But a lot of people are tuning into it??? Like everyone is so entertained by the three of you and your conversation

Once you three realize what happened then you all agree that this must become a weekly occurrence

Even the other overlords listen in on it every once in a while, finding it hilarious

Vox is absolutely livid because he's being IGNORED, why is nobody watching tv anymore???

He tries to get you and Rosie on his show instead but the two of you don't even take the offer seriously

The chemistry would be all off without Alastor's sparkling humor anyways

Which makes him throw a huge tantrum that becomes the next topic between the three of you

Y'all are just trashing this man at this point

It's his own fault for providing you three with so much ammo

But nobody is safe

It's just a fun little gossip podcast that somehow blows up and turns into this gigantic thing

But it gives you three an excuse to hang out

Whenever the conversation starts to drift towards the hotel you try to stay out of it for your own reasons

And it does always go back to the hotel, Alastor is running a business afterall

Alastor slowly starts to warm you up to the idea of his hotel, whatever your motivations are or if you believe in it

Rosie also encourages you to at least humor him and go see it

Easy for you say, he's not pressuring YOU

So you give in one day, accompanying Alastor to the hotel

Huh, Alastor wasn't joking when he said that Lucifer's daughter was his partner 🤔

You're not entirely surprised when you see the shocked looks everyone gives Alastor when they see you

WTF ALASTOR WHEN YOU SAID Y/N WAS COMING I DIDN'T THINK YOU MEANT Y/N THE OVERLORD

Who else would it have been, Vaggie???

Everyone nervously watches you and Alastor interact, it's two extremely powerful beings in one hotel

Except for Niffty, she greats you like an old friend, climbing all over you and making maniacal noises

Husk and Niffty are the only ones not surprised by your friendship, knowing that you and Alastor are good friends

They fill the others in on your relationship when they think you two aren't listening

It's almost funny hearing it come from someone else, you had nearly forgotten how you two met

"That's right..! I DID try to kill you! That's so funny!"

"Isn't it? And I do believe I nearly bit your hand clean off!"

You two are fucking deranged

You have a better understanding of why Alastor wants so much support for this hotel now

And you're a little surprised that Charlie seems to believe so genuinely in the idea of redeeming a soul

Regardless of if you're sold in the idea or not, you agree to support the hotel for Alastor

But now you're going to rope Rosie in with you too, if you're gonna go down then the three of you are going down together

But that's unlikely to happen, Alastor wouldn't lead you guys into a death trap

He's never steered you wrong before

This was so fun to write!!

#hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin hotel x reader #rosie hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader #alastor hazbin x reader #rosie x reader #rosie hazbin x reader

[thenerdywriter]

"it was awkward to see colin flirt and behave like a rake" "he gave me the ick" yes ! that is the fucking point!! congratulations! you have the media literacy skills of a fucking monkey because my 4-year old niece could understand it better than you do.

we are supposed to find colin cringey and annoying and get the ick because that is not who he is. he is not anthony, or simon, or even benedict. colin (apart from gregory) is the sweetest of all bridgerton brothers (i'm going by book canon) and his most identifiable character trait is the fact that he values an emotional connection above everything. he runs away to the continent because he wants to feel that emotional connection. he has meaningless sex in brothels because that is the example he has seen growing up, that is the norm. he tries so hard to fit into the norm. he goes out drinking, adopts an entirely new personality, learns flirtations because that is how he thinks he will fit in. he's got armour on, as violet said. he puts everyone's needs above his own, he stops rambling on and boring his family with details of his trip because he knows no one cares. he doesn't talk to anthony or benedict about his heartaches because he knows they still, somewhere in their heart of hearts, view him as the annoying younger brother. he's so devastated by his closest friend not responding to him that he adopts a new personality in the hopes that it might mask the hurt better. he runs after penelope in episode one because he is so attuned to her emotions that he knows she's hurting, and tries to comfort her even when she's spiraling and lashes out. he must have been hurt by her words in the "good night mr bridgerton" scene but he puts it aside to genuinely apologise to her when literally no one else in that family would do that. colin, instead of brooding over his own feelings, goes and corners penelope in her family's garden and apologises to her, disregarding his own hurt at being cruelly dismissed by his close friend.

penelope asking colin to kiss her is not a mark of how "pathetic" she is. she has written and shamed herself in a manner that is almost entirely unsalvageable. she is at her lowest point, and then portia comes in and reminds her of how undesirable she is, and she sinks even lower. she asks colin to kiss her because she sees it as a final act, after which she can quietly wave goodbye to her dreams of ever getting married and leaving her mother's home. colin kisses her because he is also keenly aware of how she's feeling. he knows how hurt she is, he wants to do anything to alleviate that. be it cracking a joke, or kissing her. he is gentle, because he wants it to be something she can dream of when she's by herself. penelope, at this moment, has no hope for herself, and their kiss is an act of letting go for her. no, it's not a pity kiss, no he did not like her after her glow up, he has always loved her. him being struck dumb is a reaction to her physical transformation, nothing more. he does not flirt with her in that ballroom scene, he only approaches her when she's in distress. he's not flirting with her. i can assure you penelope could wear the frumpiest most neon yellow gown of all time and colin would still go "<333 my pen" for her.

colin jumps to catch the balloon's ropes because he sees that penelope is in danger, he does not give a shit about anyone else lmao. he feels temporary relief when he sees eloise run to safety, but the moment he sees penelope in immediate danger, he rushes to take action. afterwards, when he sees that she's being comforted by debling (all my homies hate debling, even if he is aro/ace coded i do NOT claim him) he does not approach her. it would be easy for him to do so, but he does not, because he respects her boundaries. colin bridgerton is the only man in the ton who respects women (the featherington sons-in-laws are too pretty to have a thought) he calls out fife and his friends for treating women like objects and calls them cavalier. the only way he would have been more explicit about his demisexuality was if he tap danced on the club table (entertaining thought, luke newton please)

colin also rapidly takes action, something which no one in the show has done so far. simon would have died instead of accepting his feelings for daphne, daphne would have been content with a loveless marriage forever instead of asking for help. kate would have pushed edwina down the aisle and gone off to india instead of confronting her own feelings, and anthony would have married edwina if she hadn't been brave enough for the three of them to run from the altar and ruin herself. penelope stood on the sidelines for years and loved him quietly because she had no hope of him loving her back. colin, the moment he is assured of his feelings, runs to penelope, almost kisses her in the middle of a ballroom. when he hears that debling is about to propose, he goes to the ball, just to dissuade penelope one more time. he cuts into their dance because he's desperate. when he runs after her carriage, he asks her if she has been proposed to, because he would not have touched her otherwise. he confesses his feelings to her only when he knows that she hasn't gotten engaged to debling, and when she says "but we are friends" he moves away. nothing more. he would have let her go, if she did not return his feelings.

idk whether i should be flattered or offended at people misunderstanding this season because on one hand it is offensive, but on the other hand, it means only smart people get polin. seriously. your minds have been rotted by insta-love and enemies to lovers that you can't even appreciate the innate beauty of friends to lovers. being friends with someone and then holding all those feelings for them. the trepidation of possible rejection. the fulfillment of being loved by the person who knows you the best of them all. the privilege of loving someone whose feelings you know better than your own. love is gentle and kind and yes it is a violent, uprooting force but above all, love does not hurt anyone. it does not hurt you. i could love someone quietly for years and it wouldn't bother me if their feelings were requited or not because my feelings are none of their business and i consider it a privilege to love and be loved by them, even if it is not in the way i would want it to be. polin are privileged in the highest sense. they know each other better than anyone else, they know how to love each other better than anyone else. to think they are rushed or they dont deserve each other is a disservice to both of them. they would be miserable with anyone else.

in other matters, if i see one more person talking smack about luke or nicola behind the safety of their screens i will personally get a bazooka.

#bridgerton #polin #bridgerton season 3 #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #colin x penelope #colin my beautiful boy i will avenge you from these dumb people #penelope my sweet girl you are a dumbass but i am rooting for you and the love of your life #also anyone else see that complex female characters on this show are much better written when there's a woman running it? #hmmmm jess brownell you have my respect...for now #long rant but uhhh i am writing a fanfic where i erase the mistakes of cvd (the ghastly man) #the only good thing you did was the casting and i doubt you had a hand in it at ALL #luke newton and nicola coughlan the ACTORS that you are

[moondirti]

Hellloooo🖤 I’m the anon who asked about the Safehouse story!

My brain, unfortunately, is not nearly as wrinkly as yours so I cannot come up with creative ideas like you 😂 BUT! I have a few ideas? Maybe? If you can call them that lol.

Was the spanking the first physical interaction they had? What did the morning after that look like?

What happens if reader has a nasty mental health episode & tries to hide it from Ghost?

Does the pet thing progress? I think we all know that Ghost has a thing for the pet play. I don’t even care, that’s totally canon for me at this point.

Would you ever consider writing about the general dynamic they have? Like the “rules” Ghost might have for them?

Totally and completely a self indulgent ask from someone who just had to pull themselves out of a nasty mental health episode lmao I’m so sorry please ignore this if it’s annoying or dumb!

shh i love all of these. i have so many thoughts now / prev

cw: dubcon d/s lifestyle. petplay. controlling behaviour. possessiveness. panic attacks. toxicity. noncon collaring. financial manipulation. mention of self harm. brief fluff.

Your thing with Simon is hard to contextualise.

Or even understand, really.

Parts of it are welcome. He asserts himself in a way you haven't found in the nobodies you've hooked up with previous, happy to fuck you dumb if it means you'll surrender yourself completely. Which you do. You listen intently and follow every direction he gives in bed, and as a reward he wrings orgasm after orgasm from your squirming body. You cum more in one week than you have in the past month, never not naked and sore, wrists tender from where he anchors his hand to keep them pinned above your head. You hear puppy more than your own name, at this point. And it's a concerning because– Well...

You don't mind it.

But you still don't like him.

It isn't like you necessarily need to like your partners in order to have a good time, but it certainly helps if you can tolerate them beyond a dick-in-hole condition. Simon is an anomaly in that he is the worst person you know, whilst also serving as the best lay you've ever had.

That is to say, his habits haven't changed. He's a fucking terror to live with. Nightmare flatmate, the type you see strangers complain about on reddit forums or hear in a friends story from their sister's husband's cousin. Not something you would take seriously until you live the experience – now existing as a sore, precautionary tale you'll no doubt be pitching to anyone also considering subleasing their place as a safe house.

Perhaps it's made worse by the sexual element you share. Before, he had just been your average perverse man, stealing clothes and walking in on you in the bathroom. Now, it seems that sleeping with him has given him the go-ahead to push that behaviour to an extreme. He'll pat your ass while you go about your business, or tug your hair when you raise your voice. Treats you like a pet that has yet to be debarked; just a silly, sub-human way of entertainment.

You can't help but feel you enabled it. But no–

The pet play is cute when he's drilling your brains out – and perhaps only because you can't think straight enough to raise concern – but you're not a dog. Nor do you want to be treated like one throughout all hours of the day. The onus is on him for not catching the hint.

But of course, accountability isn't in his lexicon.

Things only get worse from there.

"An' where d'you think you're going?"

You're halfway out of the door when he catches you leaving.

If you had been more iron-willed, you would slip out and scurry away before he can continue whatever spiel he has stirring. Instead, it's instinct to shrivel in on yourself, clicking the door shut before turning to face the behemoth waiting in the foyer.

"Out." You huff, intent on cold-stoning him. But it's a fools game when your opponent in the broad-shouldered lieutenant – for he merely cocks his head, waiting your silence out with more silence, and it's all you can do to bite your tongue against the deluge of excuses that pile up. "My mates thought it would be a good idea to catch brunch. Y'know– to celebrate the start of summer break. It's a nice day out so..." You gesture to your attire, like you have any reason to justify a sundress to some man you are in no way committed to.

But you can read the possessive gleam of his eyes as they take stock of your appearance: from your expensive mules, up your moisturised legs, to the low cut of your décolletage. It's easy to connect it to that look he had when you came back home that fateful night, the look of warning before he'd taken you over his lap and slapped your ass raw.

And for some odd reason, you're compelled to dig yourself out of trouble.

"Hm. It is a nice day, innit?" You nod a bit too quick. He stalks closer. "Lots of people out." Your nod is a little less enthusiastic. He's centimetres away now. "Some bad, bad men too."

He lifts the ends of your dress, slowly. Your next words quiver on their way out your chest. It's alarming to find that they don't sound nearly as assertive as you intend for them to be, not like they do horny.

"Where are you going with this?"

Your skirt pools around your hips now, held up by one hand as the other smooths over with the gusset of your panties.

"You plan on lettin' them have at this puppycunt? Have I not been givin' it enough attention?" He mockingly coos, pressing harder against the mound between your legs. Your knees grow weak. Not of your own accord, but weak nonetheless, and you have to hold onto his wrist to keep yourself upright. "Is tha' it?"

"N-No–"

"No? But that's what they'll think seeing you walk around like this, silly thing. Poor, neglected mutt, they'll say. Don't have a firm hand to keep 'er in line." Simon tuts, releasing his grip on your dress to pull something out of his back pocket. With the way he crowds into you, you can't crane your head to see what it is. "Now we can't have tha'. I spoil my girl rotten, wouldn' you say?"

"Yes. Yes but–"

"No buts, pup. Have ta stake my claim on you somehow." Something clicks. All too suddenly, you're made aware of the new weight on your neck. It tightens against the column of your throat – not enough to constrict your airways, but enough so that it hinders the way you move. "There we go. So pretty like this."

Panic seizes you, the steel fist of paralysis capturing your muscles in a vice-like clutch. Even as Simon pulls away, you're almost scared to find yourself in the nearest mirror. Scared of what you'll find dangling between your collarbones. There's no mistaking the textured leather that presses against your skin, nor the soft clink of metal hanging from it. No fooling yourself that this is all some cruel joke, not with the sick leer of satisfaction that warps his face.

Stumbling, you navigate to the bathroom and blindly turn on a light.

That cruel fuck.

"Simon," Your voice is devoid of the anger you feel roaring through your veins, circuiting through the frenzied stutter of your heart to find new passion. Instead, you sound horrified. Near hysterical, choking on your own pleas as you run back to the foyer. Your hands tug at the collar clasped around your neck, desperately searching for a buckle that will aid you in ripping it off, despite seeing the lock latched right at the centre that tells of its permanence. What's more, he had it engraved with a crude variation of a dog collar tag. If lost, leave alone. Or else count your days. "S-Simon, Simon please. Fuck– take it off. Take it off, take it off! I don't want this, I don't want... This isn't funny. I'll change if that's what it takes. Please."

Snot bursts from your nose, cheeks wet with a hot mess of tears. You can't suppress the hiccups that interrupt your begging like pathetic shots to the chest, or the weak hits you beat across his pecs. If you could, then perhaps he would give your tantrum more weight.

As it stands, you're nothing but a feral creature resisting training.

"Shhh. Pets can' speak. Pets don't cry." His thumbs press to your under eyes, tamping the flow of brine that mark steady tracks from your lashes. "You'll ruin your makeup like this."

"Si–"

He stare hardens into something dangerous. Against your better judgment, you clamp your lips shut.

"That's it. You're s'good when you listen to me, pup." Once he's sure you've stopped crying, he removes his thumbs to instead push one into your mouth. You can taste the salty residue of your tears on his fingertips. "Now, this is the bes' of both worlds, see? You can go see your friends with this on. I know pets need their playtime, af'er all."

You arch your back in protest, but all that does is bring you closer to the lieutenant. He misinterprets that entirely, of course, and a small smile breaks his face like you've agreed to his terms. A heavy palm pats your ass.

"S'jus' so you don't forget who you belong to." He chuckles. "An' if your friends like the idea, then I have a few friends for them."

You make it one block before hightailing back home.

Nothing in you wanted to give that bastard the satisfaction, but he made it so that whatever you chose to do – stay home or leave wearing a symbol of his ownership – he'd end up triumphant. Naturally, then, you opted for the lesser of two evils: to leave his vicinity immediately. Besides, you'd promised your girls you'd see them after going AWOL the past fortnight, and you knew you'd get an earful if you decided to reschedule at the last moment.

You thought you would convince them it was a bet. That the collar is just some silly joke you have to bear for the day after a football match didn't go in your favour.

But you make it one block before a tradie on his lunch break catcalls you (you about that freaky ting, beautiful?) and decide to change course completely.

You arrive back at your flat without further incident. Ego stung from the various odd looks you received on your way, but nothing as egregious as being singled out as a freak in the midst of a crowd occurs again.

Still, your hands shake as you push your key into its slot.

Which progress to full body tremors as you turn it in place.

Thankfully, Simon isn't waiting on you on the other side of the door. He sits, manspreading on the couch instead, focus zeroed in on the telly that broadcasts Fulham v Man City. When he doesn't look away, you allow yourself to hope he hadn't heard you come in. But it's a naive pool to place your faith in. Nothing escapes the man, and soon enough, his tone of humoured indifference shatters the silence you've been precariously trying to keep.

"Miss me 'lready?"

A wretched sulk, pit of anger hollowing out anew. You swiftly snatch your laptop from the breakfast bar before storming to your room, making sure to lock the door firmly behind you.

The website is bookmarked. Taunting. Sublet your home as a safehouse for our armed forces. Serve your country and help soldiers find refuge. You would laugh if you weren't so single-minded, typing in your email and password upon being prompted to. You don't have to deal with this shit any longer, nor do you intend to. If you remember correctly, there had been a way to report any problems you face. If you phrase yours right, you might just get Simon pulled from your services.

Good dick be damned.

But when you hit enter to sign in, an error message blinks in red.

Account does not exist.

Which is fine. Shit like this happens all the time. There's no reason to work yourself into a panic, you probably just used the wrong email.

So you try your alternate. Account does not exist.

It feels unlikely, but maybe you'd created it under your school email to give yourself credibility. Only–

Account does not exist.

Your blood pressure is no doubt sky high by now. Other symptoms of stress already start to wrack through you – blurry vision, chest aches, difficulty breathing. Your hands sweat excessively as you dig for the customer care number you're sure exists somewhere, efforts impaired by the ever-present weight of the collar around your neck. You wonder if Simon can smell your anxiety like a predator does its prey. If he's in the other room, salivating, waiting for you to wobble out of your room to go for the kill. Some part of you – a needlessly paranoid part – rests on the conclusion that this is somehow his fault too.

Your phone already rings in an outgoing call once you blink back to the present. While you've been functioning on autopilot, you must have found a number to call that related close enough to your issue.

And your suspicion is confirmed when an automated voice picks up. You are currently... second... in line.

It takes five minutes. When a placating woman speaks up amidst the nauseating music they have queued, you can hardly contain yourself from word-vomiting onto her. Safehouse signup. Lost account. Need to report an issue. Please. It's urgent.

"Okay ma'am. If you could give me your name, I'll be happy to find the source of your problem today." You can't spell it out any faster. "Alright. One moment, please."

"O-okay." You sniffle miserably.

"I see. I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but it seems that you've been pulled from the program after a complaint was lodged against you. Unfortunately I can't provide more detail than that, but if you need anything else, I would be happy to assi–"

You hang up. The poor thing doesn't need to hear the incensed scream that tears from the deepest parts of you, or the following crack as you chuck your cell at the wall. She'd done what she could. It isn't her fault. It was that self-serving bastard that had you blacklisted from the only thing keeping you financially afloat. It is that that self-serving bastard that continues to occupy space inside your home, despite having no real right to it now.

The tantrum isn't near cathartic enough to unfetter you from your prison of aggravation, and you continue to take it out on everything in your near radius. Your duvet and pillows. The lotion you keep by your beside table. Your own skin, nails piercing into the soft flesh of your palms.

And especially the collar constricting your throat, like vines that tighten at the first sign of struggle.

You have to get this collar off. Even if you fail at everything else, you have to get this collar off.

Scrambling off your bed, you turn your room upside down looking for a bobby pin or a knife. One is unquestionably the safer bet, but you know you'll sit for hours trying to pick the lock that keeps you shackled – so when you find the boxcutter sitting at the bottom of your junk drawer, you immediately take it to your neck.

Just as Simon barges into your room.

You're so far gone, you don't even question how this must look to him. In fact, it doesn't occur to you that you locked your door, and that the only way he could've gotten in is by having a replica of your key. No. You merely twist away from the all-encompassing hold he wraps around your arms, determined to keep the boxcutter away from his confiscation until you can slice through the leather.

But you're crying. Visibly, alarmingly unstable. And Simon's breaths are a little faster than normal, faltering in a way they only do when he's close to climax. He must be worried, which is a funny thought, seeing as he's the reason you're in this mess.

"Alright thas– that's enough of that." He grunts after managing to pry the blade from your hand. You hardly mourn the loss, rather crumbling in on yourself as your sobbing escalates. No longer frustrated, nor determined. Just primed into a suffocating panic attack.

Somewhere in your auditory periphery, you hear the clinking of glass. It doesn't register until he holds a vial of lavender extract you keep under your nose, forcing you to inhale the medicinal aroma. Soon enough, your mouth opens to swallow gulps of unscented air alongside it, and the imposed breathing exercise calms you to a point of blubbering calm.

(For someone so apathetic, you admit he handled that expertly.)

That isn't the end of it, though. Moments later, you're lifted off your feet. He cradles you in both arms as he makes his way to your bed, sitting up against the headboard and placing you on his lap. Safe. Undisturbed.

You say nothing, pressing your wet face into his shirt. For comfort, first and foremost, but the makeup that'll undoubtedly stain the white fabric is an added bonus.

"Know this is hard for y'to understand, pup." Simon begins. "Hard for you ta wrap your head around ownership after bein' alone for s'long. I won't punish you for tha'."

"Y-You don't own me." You accuse.

He shakes his head in response, like your mind is truly as little as he claims. Like you're a dog, complete with two ears and a tail, and he plucked you off the street on the condition that you heel.

If anything, he's the stray.

"Oh, but I do." A large hand rubs circles on your back. Never have you been so conflicted, so torn between leaning in and biting back. "Just don't see it yet, pet. Bu' you will, in time. And in the meanwhile, we'll establish some ground rules to help you adjust."

#do not be a cute girl around this man he will ruin your life #unedited #sorry this took me ages to pump out #tumblr deleted the first draft (?) so i had to rewrite #hate this dumb site #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ‘ghost’ riley x reader #simon 'ghost' riley #ghost #simon riley #x reader #x female reader #call of duty #fanfic #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader