watching s5e7 where noshiko attacks kira in the classroom and realized that scott mccall only dates girls with dramatic and incredibly hot mothers who make questionable parenting decisions
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at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"
like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.
"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."
... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.
and i'd still keep writing.
i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.
i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley
"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"
and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.
it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.
you create because you're greedy.
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Somebody get this kid a copy of Wolf Quest ASAP!!!!
Bonus heres the Wolf he made
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BOY<33
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my Podcast Mania! ornament is back and better than ever! With 70 podcasts, this thing is full of goodness! Find it here!
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alright I need more podcast reccs, fiction, non-fiction, inter-dimensional, all are welcome just drop the name in the comments (I'll tag ones I've already listened too)
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Gadget just looked on in confusion as this man continued talking, getting close into his personal space and chatting as if they were long friends. The wolf couldn’t help but wonder how this man had snuck up on him in the middle of a desert, and more importantly, why he left no footprints in the sand.
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confused animals
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I have said that Jonathan Sims (the writer) has haunted me, like he shows up around every corner if find myself in. Really into steampunk and cabaret in 2018.. there he is, into audio drama? oh boy there he is again, into horror books and games? YOU’LL NEVER GUESS! But I think that Beth Eyre is the same! Every series I listen she is either in it or in all of the adds! And honestly good for her! but the ways all of her characters have affected me…. Ohhhhhhhhhhhh boy
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Desert flowers
Commission for RhessReflex
hope you like it!
COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN
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some more spitballing about that AU but in a new post since that one was getting kind of long:
From Coran, Allura figures out that it may be possible to get someone's memory of the previous reality to return by having them come in contact with a specific trigger. For Coran, it was his control panel on the Castle of Lions.
Which means... she just has to figure out what each paladin's trigger is. Clearly it is not their lions. Keith is proof enough of that. But maybe she can even use it to disrupt Honerva's brainwashing.
Speaking of Keith, it is... deeply weird to see him as an Altean. But also fortunate, because it seems he has a spark of alchemical talent! Which means they can move the Castle of Lions, as soon as they get it in order.
Keith and Romelle are just confused. Why do these two- what did they call themselves again? Humans? Know so much about this ancient Altean ship?
Allura only sort of lies. She tells them she has memories from a past life, as does Coran. Technically very true! She has lived nineteen years as a human. It does make her life as an Altean princess feel a bit like a 'past life'.
Keith's a little wary, but Kosmo seems to trust them, so he decides to trust them both.
local half-Galra turned local Altean born with a lingering sense of something being off, but unable to determine what. He grows up wary and naturally suspicious. except for Romelle. he trusts Romelle implicitly.
(ironically, it was this same wariness that prompted him to never be around whenever Honerva visited. he was under her nose the entire time, and she never knew)
Keith and Romelle out on their own in the universe. What will they do? (acquire a cosmic wolf, an ancient Altean superweapon, and stumble upon an ancient Altean castle. they're keeping themselves busy.)
Pidge is Olkari and Hunk is Balmeran. These are obvious. If we had confirmation that the merpeople could get legs, I would make Lance one of them, but we don't so I feel like he's Puigian? I think Shiro's just Galra again. He gets to be fuzzy this time.
Coran gets to speedrun the sense of strangeness that Allura has lived with all her life, of being one thing and then suddenly another. It's fun!
(Allura overhears Keith and Romelle whispering to each other about their 'weird ears'. oh. now she knows how Lance felt.)
Allura is going to have to somehow teach Keith at least the fundamentals of Altean alchemy without being able to do it herself. That... shouldn't be hard, right?
(it very much is)
Their luck runs out eventually, and Honerva becomes aware that the Castle of Lions is active again. And onboard is a human girl who resembles Princess Allura far too closely for her comfort...
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Obligotry Once-a-Month art post, and here's the main five designs lol.
I'm hella busy right now and I already barely had time to draw the Lagoona and Cleo designs, I then realized I had some problems with my first take on the big three so I redesigned them. I'll make bios for Lagoona and Cleo (as well as Ghoulia and Spectra, who are supposed to be part of this "Wave 1" lineup), but just unshaded full-bodies for now.
edit: Individual artworks cause the main image is blurry as shit 😭
Tangent under the Cut!
I made some little changes for Frankie ( I now realize I didn't even complete the pattern of the leg warmers, but ngl I'm vibing with the asymmetry). I just thought their design was too busy to work for a doll. Not that I am planning on making these designs into dolls, but that was my mindset when designing them. The excessive patterns, while looking cool to me, might seem off-putting to see on shelves so I toned it down a bit. Also removed some layers of clothes cause LOL there is NO way Mattel would ever put that many layers on a playline doll. Also changed the shoes, kinda rushed the first ones I designed I didn't like them at all. I feel these one fit my direction for Frankie a lot more.
Cleo was very inspired by Mcbling era of 2000s fashion. I like G1 Cleo a lot, but I think she was of the main dolls who didn't really have a clear fashion style attached to her, just wearing Egyptian motifs. Which don't get me wrong, looked really good at times, but I feel a lot more could be done with her. I associate the Mcbling era with extreme consumerism and hyper-femininity, and like... if that's not Cleo. Gave Cleo hazy eyes, jaundice, and generally ashy skin so she looks especially dead looking.
I didn't really have that much beef with my Clawdeen design as much as I had beef with her drawing. Like it looked SO bad compared to the rest. I actually sat my as down and drew her braids this time. I also changed her bra-mesh shirt cause 1.) again, Mattel will never put that many layers on a playline doll 2.)IDK maybe I'm a prude but perhaps it was too much for a 15 year old?
Lagoona was really a case of having my cake (making her Australian) and eating it too (making her a WOC). My Lagoona Blue is a Yawk-Yawk, a sea creature with sea-weed hair from the Bininj indigenous people of Australia. I wanted to connect her to an actual sea creature because honestly G1 half-sea nymph thing was vague as hell, and G3 is giving us literally nothing.I'd like to imagine the seaweed being a plastic mold at the back of her neck, like Viperine snakes. A lot of redesigns of Lagoona tend to go for streetwear or sport-leisure, but I went for beach fashion cause I liked the vibes. To compensate for the utter mainstreamness of her fashion, I tried to give her weird makeup.
Drac changed significantly because she was the only one whose design I outright disliked, at least for a hypothetical core doll. I removed the pink streaks cause I thought while it might look cool as a drawing, it might look garish on a doll (that and It'd be difficult to root with a machine). Still think the design might be a hassle to translate to doll form (the skirt is WAY too much), so I might have to revise it, again. But I like this direction much more.
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desert eyes
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IM inktober
Day 3: Desert
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My submission for the desertbus shift fursonas! And also the first art I felt I could post in how long? Sorry y’all.
Desertbus is a charity stream supporting child’s play, a charity that makes like slightly less terrible for children in hospitals, while playing a terrible bus game.
They’ll be streaming for a good while so you should let them keep you company and maybe try for some giveaway!
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