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chernikastan · 7 months

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So yesterday I said I had ✨opinions✨ on the DLC and today I have come to the conclusion that as per usual, I will not chill until I dumped them somewhere lmao. It's mainly focused on what I've seen people say about Carmine and Kieran online, be it on tumblr or other websites.

Teal Mask Spoilers under the cut :3

I have no idea if I used the under the cut feature even right lmao I've kinda always just been a douche and ignored it when talking about spoilers as I've realised gfjdjrc

Ok anyway so. I think what personally bothered me the most is a lot of people saying "they just have a perfectly fine siblings relationship, nothing unhealthy to see here" and "Kieran is a coldass douchebag who view others as objects and only cares about strength". Both statements I strrroooongly disagree with.

First about his and Carmine's relationship, since it plays into the other thing. It seems that their parents aren't around, though it's unknown why. The grandparents are apparently pretty lackluster in taking over their job and because of that, it seems that Carmine has taken it on herself to take somewhat of guardian role for Kieran. Which is a role she's visibly overwhelmed by, which makes sense, because that's not a role you should have to take when you yourself are maybe like 17/18 lol. You can see that she absolutely does care for and wants the best for him, but at the same time she can't wrap her head around his actions and how he's feeling. So a lot of the things she does she does out of good intentions (for example telling the player for him that he's interested in them because she says he couldn't ever ask on his own, or the whole lying thing where she believes not telling him you guys met Ogrepon prevents him from feeling left out), without understanding that they have quite literally the opposite effect (Kieran feeling like he's unable to do anything on his own BECAUSE she does everything for him, and of course him feeling left out BECAUSE you and her keep meeting Ogrepon a secret). On top of that she clearly has issues keeping her own emotions down, so instead of reacting calmly she'd yell at him whenever he does or says something she doesn't like. And whether you want to see that certain one-liner as her implying she does also hit him when she's not "being nice" or not, she seems unaware of what effect these reactions have on her brother. I do think the implication might very well be on purpose, but it's just not as obviously stated as it could be because this is still a Pokémon game and we don't gotta be too in your face about child abuse in a game that like 8 year olds play lol.

Anyway, aside from him thinking he can't make decisions on his own and stuff, there's a lot of ways this treatment shows in Kieran. Notice how while Carmine is pretty open about showing her anger, he keeps trying to repress his own until later in the story where he's starting to be unable to do so? You can see that when you battle him the first couple times and he loses, the light in his eyes leaves briefly (yknow, the anime thing they both do where that shows them being angry/frustrated) before he grabs his head and just says aw man or something. And when she outs him on his crush or whatever on you, he also looks angry like that, but she immediately shuts him down like usual. I'm pretty sure that's a learned behaviour on his part, aka "when I get openly angry or sad my sis will yell at and/or hit me so I have to keep it down". That's why he always switches the topic, runs off or just goes quiet when he pisses her off or he thinks he pisses her or someone else off. It's optional dialogue so idk how many people have seen it, but Carmine confirms that at the festival, though she again misunderstands why he does it.

Have a high quality photo of what I mea-

So yeah, in short, in regards to their relationship, I think it's clear that it's pretty dysfunctional. For some reason Carmine's stuck with taking a caretaker role she cannot possibly fill given her own issues and age. As a result, she takes it out on her little brother who in turn has to suffer the double bagage of lack of parents and dealing with his older sister's moods. And with next to no social contacts outside of her, he's stuck in that situation and he's got no one to help him learn how to deal with this in a healthier way (same with Carmine really). All he knows that if he was "stronger", he could deal with this better. Like that cool ogre from the folktale that does not care what people think of it and keeps fighting for its right to be respected regardless. Stronger being a very arbitrary word here, as the only specific goal he mentions (in the beginning) is able to stand up against his sister.

Now onto the whole "Kieran sees Ogrepon, the player, probably everyone but him, as an object" thing which... yeah no, he's not a sociopath kcngjtc

More precisely, the player character comes in as this cool person who has no trouble beating his sister in a battle. They don't seem to have all that much trouble socialising either. Good thing he doesn't know all the kewl stuff we did at Area Zero and all or he'd lose it completely. I think a big bonus is also that we're not from his town, so we don't have any bias against his ogre idol. So like, he's head over heels for us, he actually gets to hang out with us and warms up as we realise we're interested in his stories and all and wow. He's found an actual real friend omg. He might not be 100% aware of that, but that's all he really wanted. He wanted to befriend the ogre because it sounded like it would be someone to understand him. And now there's suddenly this super nice person who's taking that role.

But then suddenly, that person hangs out with his meanie sister and stops interacting with him almost entirely. I have a feeling that Carmine hanging out with people he'd want to befriend and them making fun of him is just a thing that happened before and that's why he jumps to that conclusion right away. Keep in mind, the reason Carmine came to us in the first place is literally to make fun of his lack of skills at the mini game lol.

So yeah, the reason Kieran is so massively pissed off is because he does view the player character as a human being, and one he really really liked and put up the courage to open up to, yet from his POV we shamelessly take advantage of that and leave him alone again to hang out with his sis instead. Would probably come off to him like you just pretended to be his friend because you had to and now you're hanging out with the cooler kids and giggle about how silly he looked when, idk, he asked to have a sandwich with you lol. Of course this is not what the player intended (or is meant to intend) and I too felt physical pain when the game gave me no option but to lie xD but I'm pretty sure you guys making up and giving each other another chance is what's gonna happen in Indigo Disk.

For Ogrepon, instead of as an object, I think he just keeps seeing the ogre from the story in her. You gotta remember that he never gets to properly interact with her, he doesn't even refer to her by her actual name like Carmine does once she learns it. He doesn't understand that, ironically just like him, what she really wants is just acceptance and a friend. He thinks that the reason she's distrusting of him is not because she has trust issues and needs to warm up first just like him, but because he isn't as strong as you are, the one she does trust much easier. He's so convinced that nothing in his life will change for the better until he's "stronger" that... presumably the Dokutaro thing somewhere during the mid point starts influencing him. Not like, straight up possession, but more it taking advantage of his instability and promising to give him the strength he wants if he does what it wants. Just like the dex entries of the loyal three says what happened to them. So Dokutaro moreso takes the role of some guy who's a really bad influence and convinces you to do things that will harm both you and others with some sneaky lil psychological tricks. Because I mean, self-sabotaging is something Kieran literally does around the time he presumably comes in contact with Dokutaro. He completely stops trying to talk to you, he boxes the furret he apparently raised from an egg, he doesn't come along to help beat the loyal three to get the masks. I wonder tbh, if Dokutaro was influencing him, if it didn't lead him away from helping with that on purpose, since it originally made the loyal three steal the masks in the first place. I guess that would also explain why he would have been fine with Ogrepon just going back to the cave so he could get the masks back later. And while there definitely is the whole jealousy aspect, I think it's also Dokutaro leading him into actions he wouldn't normally do to get the masks. Because if he gets the masks it'll give him what he wants or whatever. I think without the Dokutaro influence, honestly, he'd probably just have locked himself up in his room for the rest of the story after you lying and sobbed into his Furret pal's fur lmao.

Soo yeah, I think that's about it. They both have quite some issues and continue the trend of ScaVio characters that really need a therapist lol. I like Kieran especially though, he's really adorable despite having his own set of flaws of course. So I do hope the next part will take his (and Carmine's) story into a satisfying direction. And I better get to give him a hug because he needs one smh. Maybe Arven can make him some top tier candy apples. Oh oh yeah, noticed btw that he adds Dipplin to his team after he gave us a candy apple at the festival and told us there's a mon that looks like one? Pokémon likes to do storytelling via the team, so maybe the Dippling reminds him of our broship 😔😔

#pokémon #the teal mask #kieran pokemon #carmine pokemon #furret deserves everything btw he better takes it back into his team eventually

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voidscarredadjudicator · 5 months

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Hey guys. Sorry for being quiet for a month. Hopping on here to let y'all know that I do still have a pulse. Things have been... fine? I guess? Here's a bit of a wordy update on my situation right now, but the tl;dr is, I'm good, HE is still on hiatus, but I'll get back into the groove soon hopefully. Also happy holidays!

The mysterious and vague 'personal life stuff' is still ongoing, and I really don't know how long it'll be something that I have to deal with. I'm continuing to not elaborate because it is very much a personal life thing, but I can assure you that nobody's dying or anything grim like that.

On an only somewhat related note, my expendable income has shrank dramatically in the past few months, so I've been having to get a lot more stingy with what I spend money on. I'm not poverty stricken; I can still afford rent and bills and groceries and whatnot, I just gotta cut corners where I can so I can actually build up my savings.

What does this mean for Humanity's Endling? Well, it's... still on hiatus, technically. But really it just means I'm picking up more shifts than I'd usually care to, which means less time to actually work on it. If work were being done on it to begin with. I'm also cutting out my NSO subscription, which unfortunately means I will not be playing Splatoon 3 much at all anymore. Granted, I was kinda taking a break from it already, so it's not like I've been getting my money's worth of the subscription anyways. So if you were curious about my absence during this most recent Big Run, or the lack of a lengthy season observation/headcanon post like last time, that is why.

All of that said, it's not like I haven't been writing at all - just been hard focusing what creative juices I'm still able to generate given my situation on the accursed TTRPG I've mentioned in prior rambles, as that's an actively running thing that I kinda need to constantly pump stuff out for.

Speaking of which, I pulled a Super Mario Galaxy and wrote a whole ass children's book for the players to find as a lore thing. It was written with the intention of just being a normal children's book in a bubble, but when viewed with the context of the entire campaign thus far, takes on a completely different meaning. Which is to say, you don't need to know a damn thing about the campaign to appreciate the story - a theory I tested by having two people who aren't players read it.

One almost cried. The other actually cried. And when the players found it in our most recent session, one of them also cried, and we had to take a breather after the fact.

Not to pat myself on the back or anything, but I feel like that's one hell of an achievement. So I am pretty proud of myself for that. If you guys are interested, I might clean it up a bit and post it either on Ao3 as an original work or just straight onto this tumblr. It's only about 2k words, so it should fit nicely in a single post.

That's all I can really think of to say at the moment. Again, even though I might seem a bit quiet, I am still here. I take a peek at tumblr at least once a day to see if anyone's sent any asks or anything like that, so don't be afraid to toss something into my inbox if you have a question.

Oh, and for the anon who sent an ask suggesting me to upload what I have of Act II done already - I don't exactly plan my stories in a linear fashion, nor do I write them as such either. It's closer to me thinking of the major moments I wanna do, plotting out how to connect them, refining, refining, refining, rearranging, refining, scrap half of what I have done, rearranging, suddenly having an epiphany, scrapping another chunk... yeah, it's a bit chaotic. I see what you're trying to say though, and I do appreciate the suggestion, but it can't really be done with the way I go about writing.

That's it from me. Happy Holidays. Play Cyberpunk 2077. It's a good game, I swear. Or Undertale Yellow if you own a toaster. It's me, I own a toaster. I played Cyberpunk on my brother's computer. Thanks, bro. Love you.

#The Adjudicator has spoken.#guess who isn't dead? that's right it's me!#also play armored core 6 #also alan wake 2 #haven't played either of those games but i want to #alan is so cool. he's a writer struggling with writer's block that loves his wife. man is just like me fr

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heyiwrotesomethings · 2 years

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(Crashes in through the window) firstly! Please take your time, it's okay that writing hasn't been agreeing with you, things can get like that and it's understandable, put yourself first before your entire online presence! Secondly, I will admit that requests getting opened is a main reason why I have my tumblr notifications for you and only you on ahah, so, this is for demon slayer, character can be shinobu or mitsuri (surprise surprise, im sorry, i kinda view you as like, the patron saint for them) I was thinking, this could either go as demon reader or demon character but what about having reader as someone who loves to paint but lives a quiet life, she doesn't really sell her art or is out there with them or anything, just preferring to capture the scenery on her canvas, now when she meet the character she goes "you're the most beautiful person/demon I've ever seen, please allow me to paint you!" and fondness and affection slowly grows for the other as reader takes her time getting every little detail down and at the end of it she tells them that they're content with their picture being their final masterpiece and being ready to die from them, sorry that this got so long! I have so many other ideas but I'd say this would be the one I'd like to see the most!

Magnum Opus: Solis

Mitsuri Kanroji x She/Her Demon Reader

A/N: I really enjoyed these prompts and I couldn’t decide which I wanted to do so I did this Mitsuri with a demon artist and then a demon Shinobu with a human artist here! I totally didn’t basically give these pieces titles like Pokémon sun and moon shhh. Hope you like these! Word Count: 3,150

Mitsuri walked carefully through the cluttered, aged mansion, her guard up. She had come here to investigate the claims of locals that a monstrous witch lived within the weathered building.

So far, she had found nothing tangible to substantiate those claims. She did find it strange however, that the house appeared to be empty, but obviously lived in. And Mitsuri wouldn’t say she’s an expert, but all the Demon Mansions she had ever had the displeasure of finding herself in never looked so cozy and warm.

Nor so full of art.

Mitsuri had to actively pull herself away from admiring the pieces that covered the length of every wall. There was so much, each one unique. Hallway after hallway, each was the same, filled to the absolute brim.

“Just how big is this place?” Mitsuri wondered aloud.

She made a quick turn, her blade at the ready, but nothing was there. It was strange, she felt like she was being watched from the moment she entered the mansion, but she had yet to find anything. The sense of dread she normally felt in the presence of demons was also absent. Maybe those claims truly were just old myths and stories. She would finish scouting the mansion and if she found nothing to suggest a demon’s presence, then she would take her leave.

Mitsuri found herself growing more relaxed while traveled through yet another quiet hallway, peaking into rooms along the way. She walked with less purpose and found herself pausing more often as certain art pieces caught her eye.

Though they were all different, many of the scenes depicted were of sunny fields and bright flowers, people smiling and laughing together under glittering sunlight. It was strange. The pieces appeared to be happy, so why did they leave Mitsuri feeling melancholy?

Then Mitsuri saw something that made her breath hitch. She blinked and rubbed her eyes then stared at the painting she had almost walked past. She could have sworn the woman in the painting’s eyes had moved.

She moved her body a little to the left and then a little to the right in an attempt to recreate the effect, but came up empty. Then she turned her back on the painting all together and pretended to be invested in another piece.

When she felt eyes on her again, she began counting down.

Four, three, two… one!

“Aha!” She yelled victoriously as she spun around, but then she let out a yelp of surprise as if she hadn’t expected her off the cuff plan to work.

The painting of the woman stared back at her with a shocked expression that certainly hadn’t been there before.

“…What are you?” Mitsuri murmured. She outstretched her hand to touch the painting, but leapt back in surprise when the woman within the painting backed away from her approaching hand and ran out of frame.

Mitsuri grabbed the painting from the wall and turned it over in her hands several times in an attempt to find the woman, then a flash of movement caught her eye and she jerked her head upward in time to see the woman seemingly running between paintings.

“Wait! Come back here!” Mitsuri commanded.

She took off after the woman, concentrating hard to follow her trajectory through the twisting hallways. She took so many turns she didn’t even no what direction she had come from anymore. After many minutes of chasing, she came to a dead end with a locked door at the end of the hallway.

Her body rammed into the door and her fists pounded against it in rapid succession. When that yielded nothing, she sighed and pressed her ear against the door. She swore she could hear a hushed voice and subtle movements from the room within.

If the moving paintings were anything to go by, Mitsuri was sure this was some kind of demon blood art spell. What if someone was trapped inside and needed help?

The Hashira pounded on the door with her fist once more. Then she jogged back up the hallway. When she reached a reasonable length away, she charged towards to the door and barged her way in, leaving a large hole in the splintered wood. Nichirin blade in her hand, she was ready to strike, but froze.

A woman, a demon, who matched the one in the paintings, had dropped to her knees upon Mitsuri’s explosive arrival, revealing the painting she had been working on since Mitsuri had arrived earlier that morning. It was unfinished, but Mitsuri could plainly see that the subject of the painting was none other than herself.

“Whah! You’re drawing me? Why?” Mitsuri was on edge, what kind of sinister thing would happen if the demon finished the painting? Would Mitsuri become trapped forever doomed to roam the confines of the canvas? Or perhaps it would make a clone of her that would parade around as her in an embarrassing manner? Whatever the case, it certainly couldn’t be good!

“I’m sorry! I know I should have asked first, but since you are a slayer, I was too afraid to. It’s just that… you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. I couldn’t help myself. I just had to paint you.” The demon worried her brush between her fingers, looking very contrite, “I know it’s no excuse…”

“What?!” Mitsuri cupped her cheeks in her hands, feeling the heat settling there in real time. Her eyes flickered between the demon and the painting, her heart beating faster with every pass of her eyes.

The demon not only found her beautiful, but the most beautiful person she has ever seen, really? Mitsuri shook her head. She had to pull herself together! She couldn’t swoon over a compliment given to her by a man eating demon, no matter how much it made her heart flutter!

“If you are trying to manipulate me into sparing your life, it won’t work!” Mitsuri declared, though she was still flushed and jittery,

The demon laughed, though it certainly wasn’t a malicious one. She smiled, though it did not reach her eyes. She shook her head.

“I’m not. You really are beautiful. I love your hair, and your eyes are warm like spring grass. The curve of your nose, the shape of your lips, the general shape and complexion of your face are are the most intricate I’ve seen. Are your moles natural or drawn? They are so perfectly placed, the symmetry is remarkable… ah, I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

“It’s not working! So you might as well stop trying!” Mitsuri had put her hands over her ears as she spun around with her eyes clenched shut. So embarrassing! Why was the demon looking so closely at her features like that? What was her endgame?

“Ojou-san? You should stop before you— oh!”

Mitsuri tripped on her own ankle as she spun and almost fell, but caught herself in the last moment before the demon could reach out to steady her.

“Could you stop messing with me, please?!” The poor Hashira felt dizzy.

“I swear, I’m being completely serious.” The demon promised. “I don’t want to hurt anyone, I never have. I just want to paint you.”

“How can I be sure you aren’t preparing a literal demon blood art to kill me?” Mitsuri asked pointedly.

“My blood art cannot be used to harm.” The demon assured. She pointed to one of the many paintings that covered the walls and the painted visage of her that Mitsuri had encountered before peeked out from behind the frame and waved shyly from within. “It’s only my paint scouts. I can see what they see and hear what they do, that’s the full extent of my power. A nosy spy, nothing more.”

Mitsuri was conflicted. She felt in her heart that she wasn’t being deceived, but what if the rumors that have brought her here in the first place?

“I sense you have questions. Do you mind if I continue painting? I will tell you whatever you want to know.”

Mitsuri bit her lip. As long as she had her sword in hand, she could handle whatever this demon could be hiding from her. Tentatively, she nodded her agreement.

“Wonderful! Please, take a seat…”

“Kanroji Mitsuri.”

“Kanroji-san,” The demon smiled, leaving Mitsuri feeling warm. “You may call me (Y/n).”

Mitsuri wiggled in her seat constantly, but if it bothered the artist as she painted, she gave no indication.

Mitsuri asked (Y/n) why the people in the nearby village would tell stories of a monstrous witch who lived within these walls if it wasn’t true and (Y/n) shrugged before dabbing at her paint and adding another line.

“People fear that which they do not understand. I’m sure if I was still a human living under these circumstances as an unwed hermit, they would still say the same things. Though it doesn’t help that I can only leave the mansion at night I suppose. I can see how that may be a little unnerving.”

“And what about eating people? I would think that is what has them unnerved.” Mitsuri frowned and crossed her arms. She may be posing for a demon’s art project, but she hadn’t forgotten what she had come here to do. She would not be seen as an easy mark!

“There were close calls in the beginning, I will not lie. However, I have yet to kill anyone. I have a contact in Tokyo who sends me blood every month. Consensually donated blood.” She clarified.

Mitsuri looked down at her sword in her hands and felt a little ill at ease with herself as the demon continued to answer her honestly without taking offense to her questions.

“What do you do then? Just… paint?”

(Y/n) chuckled, “Yeah, I suppose that’s a good way to put it.”

“Do you try to sell them at all?” Mitsuri wasn’t sure what a demon would need money for, but if (Y/n) sold her paintings she would surely be well off.

“No, it’s just a hobby. I wouldn’t want to draw attention to myself as I am currently anyway,” she switched colors and focused on the canvas again, “You however, are more than welcome to take whatever catches your eye.”

“Oh I couldn’t.” Mitsuri waved her hands.

“Please, I have more than I know what to do with. I won’t miss them.”

Mitsuri gave a noncommittal hum and then they sat in silence for a few minutes, Mitsuri kicking her legs out all the while, trying to think of anything else to ask the seemingly docile demon. (Y/n) filled the silence first.

“So Kanroji-san, why did you become a demon slayer if you don’t mind me asking.”

“Ah! Well, you know the same as everyone else I suppose.” She answered with an awkward laugh, twirling a braid in her free hand. There was no way she would tell her the real reason, it’s actually so embarrassing! She would be hard pressed to find anyone else who joined to find someone to marry. She was the only one she knew of.

The blush the painted Mitsuri’s cheeks once again was proof enough of her deceit, but (Y/n) didn’t mind, instead she asked Mitsuri about other things like her favorite season, books, food and so on. They spoke back and forth for hours, but Mitsuri didn’t feel like much time passed at all as she laughed at her own retelling of an outing she had with a few of her fellow Hashira.

Mitsuri had long since disregarded (Y/n) as a threat and had slid to the floor some time ago to lay on her back. After another lull in the conversation, she thought of something to ask.

“I noticed on my way here that you have a lot of sunny flower fields painted. Is it because summer is your favorite season, or perhaps spring?”

(Y/n) paused her painting and rested the end of the prism against her lips, a longing look in her eyes that Mitsuri did not miss.

“Should I not have asked? I’m sorry.“

“No, no, you’re fine,” (Y/n) assured before going back to her task, “It’s a longing, I suppose. I can’t go out in the sun, so I paint one that cannot harm me. It’s kind of silly I guess, but I miss getting to live beneath its warmth in a field of blooming flowers.”

“It’s not silly at all. It sounds lonely.”

“It was,” (Y/n) sat back in her chair and sighed wistfully. She looked the painting up and down before giving a faint nod and she put her brushes and paints away.

When she finished, she beckoned Mitsuri over, “thank you for humoring me, you may come look now.”

“Already? That was fast!” Truthfully it was, the sun hadn’t even set yet if the orangish glow behind the curtains was anything to go by.

“When you live a cursed life as I do, you pick up a thing or two to make the process faster. Plenty of time to practice.” (Y/n) had stated it as a simple fact, but it did make Mitsuri really want to hug her. She talked herself out of it though.

Mitsuri scrambled to her feet and leaned in beside the demon, a soft sound of surprise left her as she took in the portrait of herself in a field of a colorful variety of wild flowers, the sun gently caressing her skin between breaks in the healthy, green leaves of the tree she sat against. Mitsuri never thought she looked more beautiful.

“I’d that really… me?” She tilted her head from side to side. It sure had similarities to her physique, but surely (Y/n) had embellished her image.

“Of course it is you. I told you that you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” (Y/n) went a bit into detail of her process and Mitsuri tried to listen, but her mind ended up wandering. Knowing that someone saw her this way was almost enough to have her heart leap out of her chest.

“I’m really happy with how this turned out. I’m content with this being my last piece, I’m ready now.” (Y/n) said with a nervous smile, breaking Mitsuri from her own thoughts.

“Um, ready for what?” She blinked, cheeks rosy. She really should have been paying better attention but she had been lost in the demon’s perception of her.

“I’m ready for you to complete what you came here to do, Kanroji-san.” (Y/n) elaborated, “My time is up.”

Mitsuri yelped and grabbed the demon by the shoulders as she shook her head violently from side to side.

“No way! I can’t do that!”

It was true that it had been Mitsuri’s intention to behead the demon, but spending the day with her and getting to know her made the task seem unimaginably cruel. (Y/n) had never hurt anyone. She was just a lonely artist who wished she could feel the sun and see all it had to offer. Mitsuri sniffled.

“I really couldn’t!”

“Kanroji-san, won’t you get in trouble if you let me go?“

“Coming here wasn’t an order from headquarters. It was an investigation of my own to check the claims of the people in my sector. No one has to know!”

(Y/n) closed her eyes, a soft exhale left her lips and she pulled Mitsuri’s hands off of her shoulders. She held the slayer’s hands between her own.

“If someone did find out, that would be very damaging to you. I don’t want you to risk your rank, reputation or especially your life for hiding a demon.“

“I’m not worried!” Mitsuri tried to sound confident, but she had broken out in a nervous sweat and (Y/n) easily noticed.

“You would be doing me a favor too, you know.”

“Hah?! How could you say that?”

“This is not the life I wanted. I would have much rather lived a mortal life in the sunlight than a lonely eternity in the dark.” Her gaze fell to the floor. “All the flowers curl up at night, I’ve forgotten what it’s like to see them bloom in person.”

Mitsuri looked to the covered window, light still illuminated the curtain. There was still time!

“Wait here!”

“Kanroji-san?”

Mitsuri didn’t stay to explain, she ran down the winding halls and when she got lost, a paint scout peeked at her through a painting of a koi pond under a sakura tree.

“Uh, could you lead me to an exit?” Mitsuri asked sheepishly, unsure if it could understand her.

The paint scout nodded and traveled through a couple paintings, pausing only to motion for Mitsuri to come along.

“Wait for me please, I’ll be right back.” She told the scout before hopping off of the engawa and running into the field of flowers where she picked a large bouquet of various species. When she was satisfied, she went back to the mansion and followed the scout back to the room she left (Y/n) and presented her with the flowers.

“Here! Now you’ll remember!” She grinned, pushing the bundle into (Y/n)’s hands.

The demon gasped quietly and ran her fingers gently over the petals.

“You don’t have to be alone anymore. You’ve got me! I’ll help you.”

“I don’t know what to say…” (Y/n) wiped away a tear with her sleeve then cupped Mitsuri’s cheek, ��this is very sweet. You’re like the sun, so warm and bright. Thank you, Kanroji-san.”

“It sounds like you do know what to say.” Mitsuri felt dizzy from the praise and the cool touch on her burning face was only serving to make her skin grow warmer.

***

Mitsuri visited (Y/n) weekly with her hands full of wildflowers. They would sit together to talk while (Y/n) painted, the subject usually being Mitsuri, or whatever Mitsuri suggested. Usually it was cats in cute clothes and formal wear doing all manner of nonsensical things. (Y/n) relished the challenges Mitsuri’s mind came up with.

Mitsuri would take home some of (Y/n)’s paintings with her until her house was nearly as full of art as the demon’s was. It made explaining away the sudden additions to her fellow Hashira difficult.

“Kanroji-san, where did you get all this art? It’s breathtaking.“

“These look nice, who’s the artist?”

“I would love to have something that reflects my fiery passion! Do they take commissions?”

“Think you could snag me some? The wives would love these.”

“I’d like something with clouds.”

Safe to say, more art found new homes with the other Hashira, but the artist remained anonymous. No one could stop Mitsuri from being tight-lipped about them. They did however, notice how red she would get when questioned about them, which led to a lot of teasing from some about a secret lover.

And as Mitsuri and (Y/n) grew to know more about each other and began spending more time together, maybe the teasings of Mitsuri’s colleagues weren’t that far off.

#demon slayer oneshots #kny oneshots #demon slayer x reader #kny x reader #mitsuri kanroji x reader #mitsuri x reader #mitsuri kanroji #anonymous #requests

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the-travelling-witch · 2 years

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Holllyyy!!!😭

God I missed you and Tumblr🥺

I'm finally out of the shackles of 'Summer Classes' at my university, and so I have time to myself again.

Plus! I saw that you have 5.7k words on a fic? I hope it is what I think it is😏

Ahhhhhh I'm so excited!!!

Anyways, lemme get my usual, a lovely Cinnamon Spice Milk Tea, and one lovely conversation to catch up☕

Question of the day: (You can even make it a small drabble/fic if you want )

I've recently really been in a whole Genshin guys as dad's kinda state...like some on, you cant tell me Diluc drinking grape juice with his daughter/son or even Thoma cooking with his kid strapped to his back WOULDN'T BE ADORABLE😭😭❤❤❤

So my question is, who do you think would make the best dads? Or like what would they be like as dads? Imagine Xiao making a small accessory out of leaves for his baby to protect them when he's away...lords...imma just cry😭💕

-Cookie Customer🍪

cookie!!! i’m sorry i’ve taken so long with this, there’s literally no excuse for that ㅠㅠ

i’ve missed you and tumblr too but somewhere between writing my last fic and my vacation i’ve adopted my irl “don’t talk unless spoken to” attitude, so the blog’s gone a little quiet; i’m working on new fics though and i’m hoping for the most productive flight ever >///<

5.7k… i was so naive… war flashbacks to proofreading it but i’m still really proud of myself for writing that, so thank you for requesting, couldn’t have done it without you <3 if you missed the 11.6k monster, here

while you’re tea is brewing, let me tell you something: i think i know why i procrastinated on this ask for so long and it’s because i do not like the thought of having kids; sure they’re cute and all but i like giving them back after a couple of hours, if a fluff fic has pregnancy in the tags or there’s a child involved, i’m out ㅠㅠ ironic isn’t it

but, for you, i’ll try my best (this is not in order or anything) ♡

childe: honestly one of the best, if not the best, dad on this list i’m biased okay, despite his job and being seldom home, he still grew up with three younger siblings and learned early how to take care of them; also, his love for his family knows no bounds, so if there’s something he doesn’t know he will do his research to best provide for all of your needs also spoils all of you ㅠㅠ; the type to have multiple children (maybe two or three?)

diluc: why can i see diluc’s son playing the violin perfectly at age seven and knowing like five languages by the age of ten? sure, diluc will definitely pay for higher education but i think his child would probably be a high-achiever/ gifted kid (we’re not diving into where that’s coming from or if that’s healthy here); he still has the stoic face but he loves you both very dearly and could not be prouder if his kid achieves literally anything; i imagine him having an only child? would absolutely spoil his daughter

thoma: perfect househusband, next—

thoma: somehow the vision of thoma with two equally bright blonde twin sisters just popped into my head and we’re rolling with it; i can absolutely see them cooking/baking together “we’re going to make a delicious meal for mommy/daddy when they come home”; pouts when they’re more excited to see auntie ayaka and auntie yoimiya (ayato just gently pays him on the back to console him while the girls are running around)

venti: oh no, pray that the child doesn’t take after him— i’m partly joking but can you imagine the chaos if his child inherited his anemo powers? with venti as the dad?? he’d be like the mean girls mom “you’re doing great sweetie” while you’re running around trying to get your child off the roof he’d never put them in any danger though and always looks out of them, sometimes when his child is asleep, he gently cradles them against his chest and and reflects on how he’d never thought he’d come to this point, feels incredibly lucky to have you both in his life; prettiest self-written lullabies!!

albedo: i’m not entirely sure if albedo actually could have a child of his own but regardless i think he’d be super up to the idea of adoption either way; does safe science experiments with them and softly smiles at their reactions even if they’re just fascinated by the pretty colours and not by the actual science; the dad with a fuck ton of parenting books; he’s taken care of klee for a long time, so he knows what he’s doing (no klee, a bomb is not an appropriate gift for a five year old)

kaeya: another one who did not see himself with a kid ever but he’s absolutely thriving, he’s the soccer mom “yes honey, go kick his ass!”, will do his daughter’s hair no questions asked, if someone ever rudely comments on his child’s skin tone he will throw more than just hands; his kid can fight and won’t take shit from anyone, don’t even try to convince me otherwise

xiao: when you tell him you’re pregnant/ want to adopt, he panics, how should he take care of a tiny child?? but after a bit of reassurance he calms down and swears to give it his all and give it his all he does, ngl he’s a bit overprotective at first but soon learns that his kid is a bit more capable and doesn’t need to be handled with satin gloves (almost had a heart attack when they fell down the stairs or hit their head under the table and just continued on, yk typical kid stuff), makes little adepti charms for them (also when they were still a baby, handmade a mobile for them, so cute >///<)

zhongli: sophisticated and more elegant than your average adult, flawless manners and eloquent vocabulary, everyone in liyue harbor takes one look at the child and they’re like “yeah, that’s zhongli’s alright”; they have daily tea times together and he tells them stories about liyue; would be proud of them whether they have his powers or not; gardening together!!

kazuha: calm, both he and the kid; let’s his kid express themselves as freely as they want; teaches them how to make music with leaves and stuff; thrilled when they’re showing interest in poems and books but won’t push it on them; his kid is very in tune with nature and super respectful to all living beings except for authorities, already accepted as a member of the crux, auntie beidou!!

ayato: rewrites all his schedules to have enough time for his child, does paperwork with them on his lap and pretends to not notice them chewing on the end of his pen; also manners!! in public they’re all proper posture and formal and stuff but as soon as they’re home, they just plop down on the couch and melt into the cushions and gossip over some of the stupid stuff the politicians or whoever said

aether: very much also a nature kid, climbing trees, picking up every type of bug they find and bleeding knees every day; personality takes after auntie lumine, goody two-shoes outside, sassy as hell on the inside, if it’s not forbidden, it’s allowed; i can’t decide whether i want him to have one child or twins bc i can see him having twins with like opposite dynamics kinda like him and lumine but is that uncreative?

okay, that’s it, i don’t have any more dad!shin thoughts at the moment, let me know what your personal headcanons are!! ♡ i had a concept at first and then threw it out the window after like three headcanons

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thephantomcasebook · 1 year

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i feel so lucky that tonight i discovered your tumblr page by chance as i myself huge huge huge fan of asoiaf and fire&blood fan and they are powerful distraction from my upsetting daily routine i need to get through. Therefore, i spend everyday daydreaming thinking brainstorming lots of things

my recent question mark in my head is about Jahaera and aegon the third situation. So in the book it says, jahaera and aegon were very very quiet very reserved and didnt spend any time together since their 2 or 3 year long childmarriage they both endured. And i am also thinking even children werent initiative, but they were also kept apart from each other . As regents and other powerful adults wanted to have more power and bigger chance to getting closer to the crown through marriage. And if jahaera or aegon needs to be chosen to get rid of , that would be jahaera in their eyes as jahaera being declared the heir and sitting on the crown could be a potential for other female heirs being set aside question their rights. Therefore i feel jahaera was chosen for to be killed instead of aegon , just because of the gender not because of whether this is green or black case.

Anyway i should just get to my question , in the book cannon, after jahaera’s suicide(murder), aegon the third reportedly give jahaera’s own doll to myrielle peake(hand of the king’s daughter)

this is sooo weird to me, and i genuinely dont think george martin just put it out that detail for no reason. Apparently in the book myrille played with the doll as if it was a real one so thats a obvious hint to how myrielle and her father the hand of the king wants myrille as queen very much. But what i can not understand is why the hell aegon had jahaera’s doll and gave it to myrille, like why did it have to be jahaera’s own doll

i feel you are so far the best person i ever read about understanding george martin and understanding uncovering things

do you have any insight into this detail in the fire blood book? Why would aegon give jahaera’s doll to myrielle when he could just gift brand new doll to myrielle? Its not like aegon the third would be short of money to buy a simple 1 doll.

and aegon the third and jahaera were said several tomes in the book how they had no contact no closeness nothing between them, they only sat quietly next to each other in formal royal events which was again so rare.

i wonder maybe that was not the case? Maybe they just started to be friends and hand of the king got scared and thats why he insteaf of murdering jahaera later he did it before aegon the third would get attached to her better?

And also what do u think of jahaera and aegon the third pairing in general? I love daenaera so much and i dont think daenaera made aegon feel anything negative but i feel jahaera and aegon could had reached deeper feelings whereas i felt daenara was superficial beautiful positive distraction

Hey, sorry I'm answering so late ... I usually take off from the computer on Friday-Saturday and then come back on Sunday Night - though I'm writing this at 4:30AM on a Monday Morning.

And, I feel you, times are pretty lean around here too on a personal level and as a writer I tend to retreat to fictional worlds - my own or others - to get through the day. Which is why I get sucked into Downton Abbey and HOTD. So, I got you ... you're among friends on that regard.

I'm not sure I've got an inside track to GRRM's thinking, though we tend to be kindered spirits in terms of writing tact and methods. I've just been a fan for a good thirteen years and used to get into the weeds with fan theories and the like.

I'll be honest with you, Aegon III giving away Jaehaera's doll like that really, really - REALLY - bothered me. It's a personal tick of mine, probably because I've always been a pretty poor guy and didn't have a lot of toys - I've learned to be a book and imagination kinda person. So, I get super sentimental about toys - especially dolls. And it twisted me up inside when I read that.

I would be wary of believing "Fire & Blood" because it isn't a reliable source of the actual events - it is written and sourced by many unreliable narrators with their own agendas. So, the idea that Jaehaera and Aegon III had no contact or closeness can't really be taken as fact when, most likely, the conspirators who murdered Jaehaera fucked with the records.

To be honest with you, Jaehaera and her death is another casualty of "Oh shit, this is gonna be part of a TV Show ... let me change this." Because, when I first read "A Song of Ice and FIre" and "Dunk and Egg" Aegon and Jaehaera where the parents of Daeron, Baelor, Daena, and the others. Daeron "The Young Dragon" was literally named after Daeron "The Daring" because he was the uncle of Jaehaera and a hero to the common people of Westeros. It made sense.

Now, I've come back to the fandom a few years to see that GRRM has got a Velaryon hard-on and that he killed off Jaehaera and changed it so that Aegon III ended up marrying his niece or some shit. So now, naming their eldest kid Daeron makes absolutely no sense other than perhaps Aegon III admired Daeron a lot as a kid, despite the fact that Daeron was the biggest reason for Rhaenyra's death.

I'm sad to say that the doll part is something new to me that I, myself, have only read recently and I cannot grasp for the life of me the point of that little detail, beyond, Aegon III was just trying to be nice. Though, I would subscribe to your theory that Aegon and Jaehaera were probably closer than the book lets on, close enough that he would keep her favorite dolly when she was gone and think it important.

I don't know, man ... that whole retcon to the end of the war bothers me a lot. There isn't a point to it other than GRRM trying to shoehorn in the Velaryons wherever he can to make them more important so that people will care about them in the upcoming show.

Also, I still have my first edition " A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms" Illustrated hardcover version that still has Jaehaera Targaryen as Daemon Blackfyre's grandmother and Aegon II and Helaena marked as his Great-Grandparents. And the post script that says that Aegon V (Egg) married his older sister, not a Blackwood.

#House of the Dragon #Aegon III Targaryen #jaehaera targaryen

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love-islike-abomb · 6 months

Text

Renegade: part 2

Roman reigns x OC scarlet

Gif credit: @romanreigns

I'm posting the first 2 parts today and then I'll do 3 and 4 tomorrow. I don't wanna post it all at once and tumblrs algorithm decide to be a giant douche canoe.

Warnings: more flirting, errors I may have missed,

Tag list: @angelreigns444 @acknowledge-reigns

______

The next morning I woke up thinking the night before had been a dream but when I looked at my phone there was a text from a number i didn't know.

??: hey beautiful! I can't wait to see you again❤️

Scarlet: who's this?

??: oh I'm sorry. It's Joe.

Joe: what are you doing later tonight?

Scarlet: oh hey! Yeah I'd like to see you again. I'm actually off the day after tomorrow.

Joe: yeah that works perfectly! I'll see you then.

I don't even know this guy and somehow I find myself smiling like a fool whenever I talk to him! And why does he look so familiar?

Oh well i've got to get ready. just then my phone rang. It was my sister

"Hey Claire!"

"Scarlet! How have you been?"

"Good still working at the same boring job! Well it was boring until last night. A very handsome stranger saved me from the town drunk! He looks so familiar though! He did his name was Joe and i gave him my number and we're supposed to go on a date the day after tomorrow!"

"Well at least he was handsome and not some old fart!" She laughed

"Be nice Claire! I've gotta get going! I'm gonna be late. I'll tell you all about it later!"

"See ya"

I sighed and finished getting ready for work. I put my apron on and grabbed my keys and phone and headed out the door. When I got to work it was strangely quiet for this time of day. I clocked in and happened to look up at the corner. There he was, smiling at me. I blushed "why you blushing Scarlet?" My co worker liz asked.

She looked over at the corner and smiled "ooh someone has their eye on you! You lucky girl! Out of the thousands of women who've come in here you're the only one he's paid any attention to!" She said

I looked back at her "really? That's weird! Wonder why? There's much prettier women then me out there!" I shrugged.

"Scarlet look in the mirror sweetheart! You're gorgeous!! Its no wonder he took a liking to you"

"Pfft! Please! I mean he's very handsome and might I say a damn good kisser bu-"

"You didn't?" Liz exclaimed

"What no he just kissed me after he took me home. There was a rowdy drunk in here a few nights ago and he handled it. Was kinda hot honestly" I giggled

Joe's POV

Hearing her take about me to her friend was cute! I smiled watching her be herself. Her friend wasn't wrong! She absolutely beautiful! I shouldnt be falling for her. Who knows what she'll do when she finds out.

I watched her Everytime He came near my table she'd be sure to smile At me and I'd smile back. It became a game. A cute little game. She didn't take it to far which was kind of a turn on. She left a lot to the imagination but her curves were clearly visible Through that outfit and her ass was round just begging to be smacked! Snap out of it Joe! Fuck I can't keep my eyes off her watching that ass bounce like that. I liked my lips and she must've noticed cause she had a school girl smile and was blushing.

I would kill to be inside her right now! Making her scream my name!! Fuck Joe settle down!! Oh shit here she comes!

"Hey! How've you been?" She smiled.

"I'm alright. I wanted to ask you where you wanted to go for dinner tomorrow"

"Oh I don't care where. I'm not picky" she smiled.

"We can go anywhere you want! My treat" I smiled.

She looked down "I was thinking of cooking at home actually. I work at a Restraunt so I'd like to have a change up"

"That actually sounds good! Tell you what I'll get what we need and I'll surprise you with what we're gonna have" I smiled.

"I'd like that! I have to get back to work though. I'll see you later!" She smiled and walked behind the counter.

I didn't know how she did it but the more I saw her the more I fell for her but the question was when she found out what I was would she feel the same?

#roman reigns #wwe #wwe x oc #roman reigns x oc #wwe fanfiction #roman reigns fanfiction #Spotify

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butimnotasexyrussian · 3 months

Note

Wait you texted your boss you love her?! Say more right now 👀

Wait, holy shit do I have access to my inbox again? FUCK YEAH. My messages are still missing and Tumblr is still not letting me reply to any posts but this is definitely a step up.

Anyway.

Gather round, children, and let me tell you about the dumbest shit I've pulled at work thus far.

I'm generally very quiet. So not even 3 months into this new job where I have no idea what's happening and I am NOT friends with my boss who I kinda/sorta idolize, there's a work outing at the state fair.

It's a good time. We get sorted into teams to do a scavenger hunt and then there's a division wide happy hour afterwards. I have a few drinks at happy hour and I'm chatting with people who I don't know. It's all good.

The calendar hold was only until 5 so I figure I'll leave then. But I get roped in with a group (including my boss) to go to a secondary location. I don't realize until later that it's past 5 so most of the people who have kids and families to get back to have left. At this point, I'm maybe 3-4 drinks in? And 3-4 drink me is when I get loud and aggressive and touchy.

Here, I loudly proclaimed that I was tipsy and it was everyone's responsibility to take advantage of me so I'd be buying drinks. After the first round, my boss tried to buy and I hip-checked her out of the way multiple times to hand my credit card to the server. She said, "Stop buying me drinks! I've seen your paycheck. You can't afford this!" And I said, "Shut the fuck up and tell me what you wanna drink."

This went on for like 5 more hours. I physically did not let her buy me anything. I told her I'd beat her up if she did. At one point, I got on the ground and did pushups? It was nice to see her outside the office where she seems more human and sometimes she hates her job too instead of the polished LinkedIn persona I feel like everyone has in corporate. One of her gripes is that she's been turned down for a raise multiple times despite doing a shit ton of work.

What you need to know about me is that if I decide I like you, we ride or die now (whether or not you want me to be. There's no gift receipt for this bitch). So of course I got very indignant on her behalf and said I'd beat up her boss because how DARE he deny her anything, especially when she carries the team on her back (my words, not hers). And then she was like, "I could do better as a manager" and I told her to shut up because she's amazing. But she wouldn't accept it and I was full blown drunk at this point so the logical conclusion was to hug her and kiss her on the cheek? She went oh! and laughed a little but she was definitely not as drunk as I was because she has like pure Nordic blood and my one saving grace is that I don't get the Asian glow.

After that, we got separated. (The day after she said she went to get fried pickles and thought I was right behind her.) Instead, I got swept out the exit with the rest of the crowd. I was drunk but cognizant enough to be like, hey I should tell her where I am since I didn't say bye. Which is when I sent her this:

And also this:

The drinks were catching up with me now so I called my mom to pick me up at the bus stop. I'd laid down on the grass to try to stop everything from spinning so much and also thrown up a bit. I didn't think it was that bad but my mom says I looked awful tottering over to the car, wiping my mouth and covered in dry grass.

I'm at the age where if I drink too much, I can't sleep and I never black out (which is good), so I spent the entire night replaying memories in 4K and thinking, why the FUCK would I say/do that? Also this was a Wednesday, so I had to fucking go into work the next day.

The I love you part is embarrassing but fine. Threatening people is less fine, but whatever. I really didn't have any excuse for the kiss on the cheek though. I was fully expecting my performance review to start off with my boss going, "Look, we have a no tolerance policy for sexual harassment here so..." and like, fire me.

Luckily she was cool about it and laughed it off, but I was so embarrassed for months. Now the embarrassment has worn off and it's just a hilarious story. But listen to me kids, the moral here is don't ever EVER get drunk at a work function.

#literally why am i like this #it's not even necessarily a drunk thing because last month i fully sober went up to my team and said #just took my last final (theology) for undergrad this morning. I'm done with college and done with Jesus. who wants to do shots with me

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blindedguilt · 3 months

Text

It's been quiet for some time, Leonard had noticed — not unlike the time he spent in the forest. It left him feeling some way he couldn't exactly tell. Was it unease? Possible loneliness? Either one was a feeling he hadn't expected to come back in such a way, but similarly, again, it had dug up a familiar memory of the forest...

Having finished tending to the small bonfire where he sat, Leonard's shoulders dropped and his head leaned back. For the first time since his pact — since meeting Seere — he wished he could be relieved of his blindness if only to confirm he wasn't alone as he thought he was.

The bonfire's warmth kept him comfortable, at least, as did the hope of the momentary thought that echoed throughout his mind: Time would tell.

//So this isn't an easy decision, but after a couple weeks of mulling it over, I've decided to put this blog into semi-permanent hiatus - basically, if things change either with the state of the RPC or my motivation to write I'll be more than eager to return, though it does seem unlikely.

//Things have been quiet lately, and it's of course by no means anyone's fault for being quiet!! (I can't blame them, life and Tumblr bullshit have taken a toll on a large portion of the RPC as a whole lately) But in the end, I think it had more of an effect on my motivation to write than even I expected. I tried for the past year or so to "Get back on my feet", as even now I deeply miss Leonard and being able to write him, but evidentially, I haven't gotten very far QwQ

//That said!! While this could be it for this blog, if anyone wants to discuss plans for plotting or even just chatting over Discord (At the end of the post), lemme know! One of the hardest things about the choice to leave this blog behind is definitely the loss of community that comes with it, there were a lot of people who followed me and that I briefly spoke to these past months who I don't want to cut off a potential friendship with just because of my own personal circumstances!

//And going onto that topic, I won't be shutting down or removing any current drafts or asks in my inbox in the event I ever magically DO get motivation to write again or something changes, and of course, that in turn means the blog itself will be staying as well!! You might have guessed, it goes without saying that this blog and the interactions on it mean a great deal not to just me, but (At least I hope!!) some of you. It's also a bit of why I wanted to "wrap up" the blog with the in-character piece at the top, even given my issues with writing (I may add to it to make it feel more "complete", given I kinda don't like how half-assed it feels currently), it just didn't feel fair to go for what could be forever without letting him speak his final piece. :,)

//I won't spend too long waxing out all the sentimentals, but I've stated over and over how when I first made this blog, I really wasn't expecting it to last much more than a couple weeks before moving onto another character. It's kind of impossible for me to state just how much this blog and all the experiences on it mean to me personally and the impact it's left, both personally, as I mentioned before, but also in my enjoyment and love for Drakengard 1 and 2 and Leonard's character specifically! Being able to dive into his mind and find someone I can put together so easy with such a well-constructed tragedy, it's not much of an overstatement to say that ironically, being able to play and put my own mind and problems away for one I not only cared to look into, but one I could more easily pick apart and explain the actions of while being layered enough and having enough facets to make it interesting. Leonard in a lot of ways was and is a sort of second life for me, but in a way I didn't have to deal with the burden of having a psychical body or firsthand perspective! lmao

//And not to be sounding all overdramatic or anything but as I said, it's letting go of not just what feels sort of like a little hideout or small part of me I like to nurture and keep from falling into rot, but this blog is some of the most fun I've had in a horribly otherwise busy, yes, but very mundane outside life. It's sort of pathetic to admit, but I mean it in the best way I can when I say I haven't really gotten so emotionally engaged with anything in a long time. Just the small interactions and memorable snippets from this blog, both from long-standing partners, people who fell off, or even people I just spoke to once and then never again still play over in my head and definitely spark a lot of joy when I really need it! I'll be honest, there's not one day that goes by where I don't think of at least one interaction I've had here. I remember my pain at being in a different timezone and always falling behind the drama before I went to the US and could finally catch up. To update on that: I'm not doing too well in the US in all honesty, but I'm doing my best to get on my feet and making progress!! One of the first things I always did in difficult situations was, unironically, use this blog to reference some old posts and memes to laugh and think about all the new connections, subplots, and jokes that were going to be shared.

//I guess the final point I'd like to make is a short one, but a major argument I had against shutting down when the thought first entered my mind, and the hardest part of all this is the loss of potentiality. I had a lot planned for Leonard, both things that I actively wanted to do and just general questions of "What kind of people will he meet with next? What will he think of them, and how long will they get to develop with each other?" The thought both of meeting new people and the interactions that could be shared with them, as well as all the different interactions and shenanigans that I thought might be in store when the DOD RPC came back was a major motivator in why I kept trying to fight my writer's block, and why I even kept this blog going for the past year with barely any activity to speak of. Even going on Discord, as you might imagine, can be limiting in its setup compared to just being able to search and see who's out there via tumblr - and joining communities can be quite an issue being a Leonard mun, specifically!!

//But either way, I'll be sure to find my way around it one way or another, and hopefully, by some divine miracle, I'll just end up back at this blog anyways!! Again, the chances are slim, but I'm really holding out here dskhffkdbhdkh

//I think that should be it based off what I wanted to say, Leonard's left nice and comfy at his campfire, and it's getting late so with ALL that said, if we've spoken or never have before (ESPECIALLY if we never have, I like to believe you followed for a reason so I'd love to speak to you so we can get to know each other better, plot, or just chat!!), please consider following me on Discord!! I'm usually on there, and always happy to talk (Unless I'm on Do not Disturb, but that's hardly ever lol):

//My discord is: barnabism

//Anyways, I apologise for the downer announcement, but this has been wracking my brain for the past few days so I'm at least glad just to get the hard part over with. :,)

//Thank you all for over two years of writing!! Please don't be afraid to reach out, and as always, if you have any questions, please ask!! ^^

#Important #||OOC||#{/man; im getting all emotional now lmao}#{/ive had this draaft open all day i literally have like 36 tumblr posts to catch up to now.....}#{/in the morning; though; im tired and have a doctors app early today}#{/posting this will hopefully get rid of some of the HUGE struggles I've been having in the past couple days; but... *crumples*}#{/I'M GONNA MISS YOU GUYS SO MUCHHHHH 😭😭}#{nevertheless! that is why I gave my Discord lmao}#{/Goodnight!! And as I said before; thank you all so much :'))

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stormblessed95 · 1 year

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Isn't it disrespectful to LGBT people that a group who shows their support to LGBTQ and always said big things about equality, equal love...a member of that group performed in Qatar where LGBTQ is a sin?? Isn't it disrespectful to LGBT community? What's the point of their support then?? Does money matter that much to the world's superstars?? Or their support was just a drama? Especially if we consider that jk is the part of LGBT himself becz we think he's with jimin?? If jikook is true...then what support is he giving to the community as a world super star?? Or may be he's not queer, not a part of LGBT.. that is why he agreed to perform there at the first place. Or maybe he's greedy enough to make history for himself without giving any care for the community which they say they support?? You can't just say this and then perform in a country where LGBTQ is literally called a sin. That's double standards.

Or maybe the company is making our fool for years by throwing Jikooks interactions at us to make us think that they're a real couple and that.. the company and members support LGBT but in reality... thats not the case. I saw video and photos of jk with the staff in Qatar. Jkkrs thinks from years that he's shy in front of girls..but he clearly looks very comfortable with the female staff then the male staff there even if he met them for the first time. Or maybe that's the main reason he was chosen to perform there not other member becz he's not queer. I don't think it's fair to LGBTQ people.

Are you queer? Because I'm part of the community and I don't feel slighted. My opinions are my own and you are entitled to yours. Also JK putting his arm around women for photos is the exact same thing as he does for men and again, holds no barring on his sexuality at all. And he could like both genders or more too.

I've posted my thoughts about the ciritisms he has faced for performing in Qatar here too

And I posted about how ridiculous it is to assume he is straight because of this performance here too

And if you click on the hashtags or just search Qatar on my blog, you'll find even more. Hope you feel better after getting that rant off your chest.

Been here, covered that. Don't wanna do it again. Anyways, hope everyone who can is streaming Dreamers to support our Jungkookie!

#JK Qatar issues

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fuzzyreadingfictionpeanut · 1 year

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Hi it's me again

Today 060623

It's been 2 year since i last open this Tumblr app

I've doing well and now I've also got some exciting story to share or write ✍️

For first year of 2022 I've been doing well just got my new job as a kitchen helper nothing much I'm doing well at my work and the boss seems good they love how i work they also complement me for doing a good job but fortunately i only last for 3 month then i quite or got out of the place and then starting that i suddenly realized since I've got my paid there just fine and have some saving I've thought of spending it well i spend it on myself i do what i love i go to my first ever event cosplay and first time cosplaying cause that's what i love and I've always been wanted to wear a costume and be something else like bringing the character i love to life well even though my style that time still new well still im fully satisfied with myself oh yeah also i started to go and talk to some other cosplayer i get to experience a new things it worth every penny I've spent it'll be a good time for me I'll remember that dayy foreverr then unexpected things happen i gotta meet lot of new people all kind of people they all nice and kind but still all the cosplayer are to hyper while me there an ambivert i get along with then just find but i started feeling lonely again and lost since I'm not to good with people lots of them says they thought that im a hyper person since me in chat is soo friendly and hype but meeting in person im a quiet person don't talk alot unlike in the chat group and yeah that's how im ,

And in that group chat and events I've also had a crush on someone at first i don't know what that feeling then eventually we meet and greet then chatting then talk about i don't know nonsense,

Well he's been catching my eyes since the first event we meet but don't talk just passing by each other just like a stranger walk pass then one time i follow his Instagram and comment on his status and got his number but still scared to reach out to him yet then one time i got a good excuses to use to dm him, i without wasting more time i dm him and started a small conversation like "will you go to the next event"

He replied then my heart beats suddenly up down badump baadumpp×_×

im dead then we started our longg2 conversation started askingg bout each other like or dislike and then the story go on long and we also fight but then we mad at each other duhh i also don't know why but i always over spoke about anything i want to say but one day finally we talk again after a month or week we haven't contacted each other he finally chat me then im shock feeling relief but unfortunately i got a fever that time so i can't meet him in any event since i can't go outside then we become like we're usual talks about our day telling story to each other playing some q&a then i started spending more time on my phone waiting for his notifications to pop out on my screen then few months past we still talk we only know each other for like a few months then i started noticing that he's been talking about other women he's been catching an eyes on he thinks he has a crush on that girl well i admitted it it's kinda hurt me but i don't really care much bout it since i don't really know what it is then one day he say that he will be confessing his feeling to her today then i without no hesitation i cut him by telling him about my feeling towards him saying how i think I've got a feeling towards him how I've been thinking about him since our first meet and first talk,at first i don't really sure if what im feeling is love but after months talking to him while thinking about him I've also been asking my friend on the internet bout this feeling that i have and they said of course it's love,

Then of course he's answers shocked me and made me feel more nervous waiting for his answer then he replied by askingg me back if i'm being serious about it and not just messing with him then of course i said yes i'm talking about what i really feels then we he answer then yes it is <⁠(⁠￣⁠︶⁠￣⁠)⁠>then i started rolling in bed like a crazy worm to happy and scared at the same time (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠) i can't believe that,I've got my first boyfriend and now i have to figure out how to be a good girlfriend for him (⁠◡⁠ ⁠ω⁠ ⁠◡⁠)

#Spotify

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fuckepilepsy · 1 year

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I'm not doing EpileptiCon this year. Or probably ever. You might have figured that out, considering that in the past, I've posted announcements a week or so in advance, but have been silent this year. I probably should have said something sooner.

I know that as the progenitor of the concept, I kinda have a responsibity to be the spearhead of the event, but frankly, it's not worth it anymore. Interest and participation have dwindled every year since it began. When we had the first EpileptiCon in 2017, it was very successful, to the point of being a little overwhelming, so I expected it to grow every year.

But instead, the opposite has occurred.

Granted that 2020 and all of its attendant woes came along and took the piss out everyone, and 2021 wasn't much better. I also acknowledge that I let @the-twitchy-life MC EpileptiCon the last two years by herself. But right now I'm very rested and have ample time to do it, but I just don't have the heart for it anymore.

Here's a secret: last year, only two people entered for the EpileptiCon giveaway. Two. At the end I just bought duplicates of everything and sent them both the prize. If I recall correctly, there were forty-two entrants in 2017.

Furthermore, EpileptiCon prompts have improved every year between contributions from Twitchy and myself (with exception to the aberration that was 2020), but the response has been less robust each year. I don't know why. We've refined our approach, stepped up our game, tried it for a week, tried it for the whole damn month. Has the novelty worn off? Has the culture of the community changed? Is it me? I don't know.

It just seems like there's this core group of people who really care, but fewer and fewer people are really into it as time goes by. I deeply appreciate that core group, and I'm grateful to them for their continued enthusiasm, but it feels silly to go through all that effort--and in the case of the giveaway, all that money--just to see diminishing results.

Anyway. I don't mean to sound bitter or resentful. I'm really not. I'm very grateful to all of the people who have joined the party over the last five years. It's just that for whatever the reason, all of the excitement and anticipation I used to feel about EpileptiCon has become anxiety and dread. So it's time to stop.

I suppose that some element of my apprehension is a growing feeling of alienation from the community on my part. I started my first epilepsy blog in March of 2013. It was the first time that I had explored my identity as an epileptic, and as a disabled person, and the first time that I expressed things that had weighed on me for a long time. It was cathartic and energizing.

But that was a long time ago, and mine is the only remaining blog dating back to then. I've learned, over time, that the epilepsy community on Tumblr is largely ephemeral. For the most part, people drift in and out of it in a matter of days. Sometimes we'll get a new epilepsy blog that announces its presence, only to never make another post again.

And that's fine! Everyone gets to choose how much they want to interact with others, and choose the terms of their involvement with the community. It's just that it leaves me feeling old and out of place. Like I should have called it quits for good years ago.

I miss my old friends and fellow bloggers. I miss a lot of the people I never hear from anymore. I remember their names and the things that I admired about them. I miss ye olden dayes when I could unleash some absurdity or explosive outburst and have a bunch of pals play along. I miss the camaraderie.

The epilepsy community on Tumblr has always been gloomy, but it's just so quiet these days. We used to be an ornery bunch, and I drew a lot of energy from that.

Each passing year brings me farther from what I cherished about the epilepsy community on Tumblr, and I just don't have the heart to run an imaginary Internet festival for epileptics on anymore.

I'm sorry if this disappoints anyone. I feel terribly guilty. However, @haikyuupaladin has announced that they will be posting discussion prompts and keeping the conversation going, and I will be supporting that effort. I hope you will join me.

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sensitivecth · 1 year

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Now or Never - c.h. fic

hello i wrote a calum fic that's angsty with a happy ending🫣 i kinda fell off tumblr but had some inspo the other day and it produced this. i started to write this after i learned my crush was moving to a different state, it hurt(s) so i made this to cope. i just finished it tho, good luck!

about 1.6k words, tw//smoking, tw//quarantine, bestie!calum, friends to lovers?? kind of, dj!cliffo?? a pinch, probably set in late 2021. girl IS latina she IS plus size, if you're not into it get over it. girlie can also NOT smoke, trust me i've tried, to explain the beginning! all love<3

I shuffle my feet out of the bar for some fresh air. Calum’s in tow for a smoke break.

We’ve been having a great night. He asked to hang out when he came back to town to move the last of his stuff. Suddenly we've been at the bars since 8.

“You sure you don’t want one?” he asked me teasingly. He knows I can’t inhale anything but air.

As the door closes behind him, I can hear the music quiet into a muffle.

“Haha, funny,” I deadpan in return, looking at the sky from nerves.

How can I not be nervous? I want to confess my crush I had on him for over a year. He’s so nice to me, he’d never make me feel bad. But he’s also moving back to the city. He’s been telling me all about the apartments he’s been looking at and jobs he’s applied to.

“Y/N, what’s up?”

I looked at him- made eye contact even- and got scared. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything.

“Y/N?”

“Oh yeah, sorry,” I got out. One time I told him how I hated eye contact. It stresses me to think about which eye I’m supposed to stare at. He told me to just look in the middle at the nose.

I looked back at the sky. My heart started racing.

He knows. He’s moving by next week but he knows, he has to right? I don’t think I hid it super well.

“Calum, I just-“ I stopped.

He’s staring at me again, I can feel it. I finally turn to look in his direction.

“You can look up at me, you know I love those brown eyes of yours,” he said. “Let me see them.” But I don’t look up.

I could just not say anything. I don’t have to tell him. He can move and we can keep talking like we did all of quarantine to continue our friendship.

But I can’t. I have to say something. Now or never, right?

“I don’t want you to say anything please until I’m done. This is hard for me, and I’m not sober so there’s some liquid courage backing me up.”

“Hm,” he paused, looking concerned. “Okay. I won’t say a thing.”

Now or never, I guess.

“Calum,” I wanted water. My mouth felt dry. “I’ve liked you for over a year.”

I pause just long enough that he opens his mouth. “And it’s super hard for me to accept a crush on someone so telling you right now is killing me.” I’m staring at his shoes now. He’s wearing an old pair of converse.

“I really wanted to be your friend when I saw one of your tattoos and asked about it. But it kind of kept tumbling into something else. And I know you don’t like me like that you don’t have to tell me-“

“Y/N but-“ Calum tried to stop me.

“No, Calum. You’ve pointed out the people you’re attracted to. You don’t have to justify it or try to pretend you liked me. I’ve seen them, Cal. They’re skinny white girls, and I know I’m not that.” My voice got quieter. I didn’t want to bring this part up.

But, there it was. My biggest insecurity around him. I’m not skinny let alone a stereotypically skinny white girl with blonde hair. I’m brown (and proud) and on the bigger side. I always have been. I’m also not the plus-size model big, I’m the fat rolls and back rolls with big arms kinda gal. I’ve never been more aware of my size than now.

“Seriously, it’s fine.” I comfort him, which is amusing to me so I smile. Why am I comforting him when this is supposed to be hard for me.

“I’ve been through this a lot Calum. I’ve had unreciprocated crushes my whole life. I’ve been asked out on 2 dates, by 2 different guys in elementary school. This isn’t new to me.”

‘This’ was being big and brown. Growing up in a primarily white school has its downsides. It looked like he was gonna say something again.

“Please, bub. I’m gonna get through this and then you can say whatever,” I saw him nod but I let the quiet sit between us.

I’m picking at my nails a bit and hear the muffled song change inside. It’s Youngblood.

Now or never, I tell myself again.

“Selfishly, I don’t think I could live with you moving 4 hours away and not tell you ever. You became a comfort person to me over quarantine. I didn’t know if it would continue when school started up again, but it did. And slowly, I wondered when you would text back. I thought about what you were doing and started to obsessively check social media to see if I could get anything from you.” I sighed.

This was harder than I thought.

“It was fine, living in my own little fantasy world of you maybe liking me. Telling my friends about our conversations and just everything I learned about you.”

It was a bit easier to say when he wasn’t looking at me. He was looking down at his cigarette.

“And then you mentioned a girl. I’m not even sure if you ever spoke to her really, you just saw her at the coffee shop. But I cried that day.”

I actually vividly remember the girl he described. She had purple pants, an old band t-shirt, and an old pair of converse as well. He didn’t talk to her, but he did say something along the lines of her being his “dream girl.”

“When you sent that text, I stopped replying for a moment. Then I put on a happy front and told you to talk to her, because of course I’m going to support my friend in whatever he decides to pursue romantically. It just stung a bit.”

“I didn’t talk to her,” he mumbled.

“I know Calum, I know.” I smiled again, thinking about how I felt that day and how I’ve grown.

He was still looking at his cigarette. I wanted to touch his arm.

“Anyway, after I responded semi-positively to that, you just kept sending stuff about girls and relationships left and right. That,” I paused for the drama and because I needed a breath, “fucking sucked Calum.”

I stopped talking for a bit. We were just standing there.

“And when we hung out in person in the park, you’d always mention how there were such cute girls around. I wondered if you hinted at me ever, but I finally realized you never did.”

Calum was still looking down. He hadn’t looked at me in a while.

“Listen Cal, I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty. I just want you to understand where I’m coming from.”

“No, it’s okay,” he said curtly. His cigarette was almost gone.

“So I kept up the friendship even though it pained me to see you talking about other women. And I thought I finally got over it after like 14 months of my everlasting crush.”

“Did you?” he looked at me briefly.

“To be completely honest, I felt like I’d get so close to being done with it and you’d do something so I would go back to square one. I’m proud of myself for only crying about it once though.”

He smiled. I love his smile.

“To be fair, I’m proud of you too. I’m not worth crying over.”

“You’re worth so much.”

“Don’t flatter me like that, my ego will get big,” his eyes twinkled with the moonlight. He was staring up now.

Ashton suddenly peeked his head outside.

“You guys okay?” he asked in a weird tone. I think he knows. He’s always known.

“Yeah mate, just going on about life ya know,” Calum’s answer was quick. Almost like he wanted to be rid of him. I couldn’t be too sure though.

“Alrighty! You missed Youngblood! Mike’s electric in there right now!” Ashton laughed as he turned.

The door did the really awkward thing where it closes super duper slowly, but I stared at it.

“Welp. That was it,” I told Calum as I turned back to him. “Yeah I don’t know. I just needed to tell you before you left.”

“Y/N, I love you with all my heart,” Calum started. He still wasn’t looking at me.

I knew immediately where this was going. I had to fix it.

“Calum, please don’t break me tonight. I don’t want that. Not for your last weekend. Let me send you off with the boys on Monday and help you pack the last of your stuff. Let me be there when you’re locking up the apartment for the last time. Let me breathe this weekend. Once you go I won’t fight it.” I’m pleading with him now. “Please give me this weekend.”

“I would never,” he emphasized, “want you anywhere but with us when we start our new lives. Like I said, I love you with all my heart.”

I felt the tears coming in. This is when he tells me I’ve been nothing but delusional and a joke. This is it.

“I see you next to me Y/N. We may be moving now, but I can never leave you behind. I won’t lie. I’m not in love with you, but I love you. I don’t know where this can go, especially starting off as a long distance thing, but we’ve done it before, right?” He’s kind of rambling at this point.

My breath is short, I am confused.

“Wait what?”

“Y/N. I wanna take you on a date. I’m confused and delighted you said anything. I’m sad I’m moving, but if you’re up for it then I am too.”

And just like that, the last year and then some make so much sense. He makes so much sense.

Now or never, I repeat to myself as I walk up to. The cigarette is gone.

#calum hood is the loml #calum hood fic #calum x reader #calum hood x reader #calum hood x plus size #cal is the loml #calum hood #best friends to lovers calum #5 seconds of summer #5sos #calum fic #dj michael clifford #dj cliffo #y writes😌

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