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mostlysignssomeportents · 3 months

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Three AI insights for hard-charging, future-oriented smartypantses

MERE HOURS REMAIN for the Kickstarter for the audiobook for The Bezzle, the sequel to Red Team Blues, narrated by @wilwheaton! You can pre-order the audiobook and ebook, DRM free, as well as the hardcover, signed or unsigned. There’s also bundles with Red Team Blues in ebook, audio or paperback.

Living in the age of AI hype makes demands on all of us to come up with smartypants prognostications about how AI is about to change everything forever, and wow, it's pretty amazing, huh?

AI pitchmen don't make it easy. They like to pile on the cognitive dissonance and demand that we all somehow resolve it. This is a thing cult leaders do, too – tell blatant and obvious lies to their followers. When a cult follower repeats the lie to others, they are demonstrating their loyalty, both to the leader and to themselves.

Over and over, the claims of AI pitchmen turn out to be blatant lies. This has been the case since at least the age of the Mechanical Turk, the 18th chess-playing automaton that was actually just a chess player crammed into the base of an elaborate puppet that was exhibited as an autonomous, intelligent robot.

The most prominent Mechanical Turk huckster is Elon Musk, who habitually, blatantly and repeatedly lies about AI. He's been promising "full self driving" Telsas in "one to two years" for more than a decade. Periodically, he'll "demonstrate" a car that's in full-self driving mode – which then turns out to be canned, recorded demo:

https://www.reuters.com/technology/tesla-video-promoting-self-driving-was-staged-engineer-testifies-2023-01-17/

Musk even trotted an autonomous, humanoid robot on-stage at an investor presentation, failing to mention that this mechanical marvel was just a person in a robot suit:

https://www.siliconrepublic.com/machines/elon-musk-tesla-robot-optimus-ai

Now, Musk has announced that his junk-science neural interface company, Neuralink, has made the leap to implanting neural interface chips in a human brain. As Joan Westenberg writes, the press have repeated this claim as presumptively true, despite its wild implausibility:

https://joanwestenberg.com/blog/elon-musk-lies

Neuralink, after all, is a company notorious for mutilating primates in pursuit of showy, meaningless demos:

https://www.wired.com/story/elon-musk-pcrm-neuralink-monkey-deaths/

I'm perfectly willing to believe that Musk would risk someone else's life to help him with this nonsense, because he doesn't see other people as real and deserving of compassion or empathy. But he's also profoundly lazy and is accustomed to a world that unquestioningly swallows his most outlandish pronouncements, so Occam's Razor dictates that the most likely explanation here is that he just made it up.

The odds that there's a human being beta-testing Musk's neural interface with the only brain they will ever have aren't zero. But I give it the same odds as the Raelians' claim to have cloned a human being:

https://edition.cnn.com/2003/ALLPOLITICS/01/03/cf.opinion.rael/

The human-in-a-robot-suit gambit is everywhere in AI hype. Cruise, GM's disgraced "robot taxi" company, had 1.5 remote operators for every one of the cars on the road. They used AI to replace a single, low-waged driver with 1.5 high-waged, specialized technicians. Truly, it was a marvel.

Globalization is key to maintaining the guy-in-a-robot-suit phenomenon. Globalization gives AI pitchmen access to millions of low-waged workers who can pretend to be software programs, allowing us to pretend to have transcended the capitalism's exploitation trap. This is also a very old pattern – just a couple decades after the Mechanical Turk toured Europe, Thomas Jefferson returned from the continent with the dumbwaiter. Jefferson refined and installed these marvels, announcing to his dinner guests that they allowed him to replace his "servants" (that is, his slaves). Dumbwaiters don't replace slaves, of course – they just keep them out of sight:

https://www.stuartmcmillen.com/blog/behind-the-dumbwaiter/

So much AI turns out to be low-waged people in a call center in the Global South pretending to be robots that Indian techies have a joke about it: "AI stands for 'absent Indian'":

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain

A reader wrote to me this week. They're a multi-decade veteran of Amazon who had a fascinating tale about the launch of Amazon Go, the "fully automated" Amazon retail outlets that let you wander around, pick up goods and walk out again, while AI-enabled cameras totted up the goods in your basket and charged your card for them.

According to this reader, the AI cameras didn't work any better than Tesla's full-self driving mode, and had to be backstopped by a minimum of three camera operators in an Indian call center, "so that there could be a quorum system for deciding on a customer's activity – three autopilots good, two autopilots bad."

Amazon got a ton of press from the launch of the Amazon Go stores. A lot of it was very favorable, of course: Mister Market is insatiably horny for firing human beings and replacing them with robots, so any announcement that you've got a human-replacing robot is a surefire way to make Line Go Up. But there was also plenty of critical press about this – pieces that took Amazon to task for replacing human beings with robots.

What was missing from the criticism? Articles that said that Amazon was probably lying about its robots, that it had replaced low-waged clerks in the USA with even-lower-waged camera-jockeys in India.

Which is a shame, because that criticism would have hit Amazon where it hurts, right there in the ole Line Go Up. Amazon's stock price boost off the back of the Amazon Go announcements represented the market's bet that Amazon would evert out of cyberspace and fill all of our physical retail corridors with monopolistic robot stores, moated with IP that prevented other retailers from similarly slashing their wage bills. That unbridgeable moat would guarantee Amazon generations of monopoly rents, which it would share with any shareholders who piled into the stock at that moment.

See the difference? Criticize Amazon for its devastatingly effective automation and you help Amazon sell stock to suckers, which makes Amazon executives richer. Criticize Amazon for lying about its automation, and you clobber the personal net worth of the executives who spun up this lie, because their portfolios are full of Amazon stock:

https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5

Amazon Go didn't go. The hundreds of Amazon Go stores we were promised never materialized. There's an embarrassing rump of 25 of these things still around, which will doubtless be quietly shuttered in the years to come. But Amazon Go wasn't a failure. It allowed its architects to pocket massive capital gains on the way to building generational wealth and establishing a new permanent aristocracy of habitual bullshitters dressed up as high-tech wizards.

"Wizard" is the right word for it. The high-tech sector pretends to be science fiction, but it's usually fantasy. For a generation, America's largest tech firms peddled the dream of imminently establishing colonies on distant worlds or even traveling to other solar systems, something that is still so far in our future that it might well never come to pass:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/09/astrobezzle/#send-robots-instead

During the Space Age, we got the same kind of performative bullshit. On The Well David Gans mentioned hearing a promo on SiriusXM for a radio show with "the first AI co-host." To this, Craig L Maudlin replied, "Reminds me of fins on automobiles."

Yup, that's exactly it. An AI radio co-host is to artificial intelligence as a Cadillac Eldorado Biaritz tail-fin is to interstellar rocketry.

Back the Kickstarter for the audiobook of The Bezzle here!

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/31/neural-interface-beta-tester/#tailfins

#pluralistic #elon musk #neuralink #potemkin ai #neural interface beta-tester #full self driving #mechanical turks #ai #amazon #amazon go #clm #joan westenberg

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the-seelie-court-official · 1 month

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the best thing about tesla vehicles is i dont even need to waste my energy cursing the owners they already spent several digits on a death trap

#memos from the embassy

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texas-gothic · 16 days

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So I finally saw a Cybertruck in person, today. It was kinda astonishing, honestly. I was walking through the parking lot, and there, right in front of the store, was this massive, hideous thing. It looked like it was from a N64 game. Banjo and Kazooie were fixing to rev up the engine and vehicular manslaughter Gruntilda with it, or at least they would if they weren't immediately turned into paste by the impact. The Tesla Cybertruck really is just a deeply unattractive machine. It both looks and is, mechanically, stupid. Of course the guy who owned it only came in to hassle us for allocated bourbon. Walked up and the first word out of his mouth was "Blanton's." Fucking typical. Hope he enjoys his $122k death trap and his $90 gasoline.

#cybertruck #tesla #elon musk

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gosh-darn-sucking-vacuums · 1 month

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So, I finally watched the Utena movie after making my sibling watch the show with me. We both loved it and there was something that I pointed out while watching that I wanted share with tumblr because I feel like this crowd would appreciate it.

So, spoilers, in the movie Utena becomes a car. After she becomes a car Anthy gets inside and starts driving, and as they go along, they take some damage and the first thought I had while watching this part of the film was this:

The crumple zone is an integral part of a safe vehicle. The damage sustained in an impact that causes it to crumple absorbing a lot of the force that could harm the person inside. This has become more well known because of how the shitty Tesla tank cars are death traps (or at least that’s why I know about it).

So all I could think as I was watching Anthy drive Utena, taking damage along the way, Is how every dent and scar on that car was keeping Anthy safe. Even when she wasn’t human and wasn’t in control, Utena was protecting her. She was built to protect Anthy.

#this thought made me so emotional while watching the film #so I had to share because I know that folks who live Utena love symbolism and crying over our girls #they are in love your honor #revolutionary girl utena #utena tenjou #anthy himemiya #utena x anthy #adolescence of utena #utena spoilers

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theallianceofcelestials · 4 months

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This is a post that is probably not gonna be well recieved, but oh well lol. Gotta let these things out too.

I miss Moon, and I meant the Old one. He was a funky character, even if he had many faults. The fact that his final wish came true, a version of him that would treat Sun better, in the form of New Moon, makes it a little bittersweet.

I'm ultimately happy Old Moon can rest, and that New Moon got the chance to live, because he's a sweety who deserves good things, and does not deserve the stress he is placed under thanks to certain forces.

But alas, this is time to go down memory lane, cuz I've been seeing people hate on Old Moon, and while yeah sure he did terrible things, he was ultimately not the monster New Moon and some fans make him out to be.

Because whenever I see someone say Old Moon was never a good brother, I sometimes begin to think if we've watched the same show or not. Yeah, he was more times a questionable brother than not, but he did have his fair share of sweet moments, even if the circumstances, which lead to his bitterness, hatred and depression, rarely let such softness shine through.

Remember how in the first SCP video, which was in VRCHAT, when Sun ran through the Tesla gate, Moon immediately went "Good job brother"? Or when later in the same video, after looking at SCP-096 or 'Shy guy', when it starts going into it's murderous rage, Sun's panicking, and Moon says: "Brother, brother! I'm okay! It's okay! Brother, I'm here!"?

Remember when Eclipse first appeared, in the "Sun and Moon TRANSFORM into ECLIPSE in VRCHAT", Sun quietly asked if he was going to die, and Moon immediately went: "No, no! Out of anything, I won't let that happen!"? He offered to go back, to be back to square one in the same body, which we know is basically his worst trauma, because he didn't want his brother to die. His brother being alive, was more important to him, than his own freedom.

Remember when in the Wither Storm Saga 3rd episode, when Moon's in a panic about the bomb not killing the Wither Storm, Sun calms him down, and brings up how the book can be used for something else probably, and how that leads to Moon figuring the solution out WITH Sun, both leading one another? Remember how Moon said to Sun: "You tiny little genius!"? How sweet he sounded while doing it?

Remember when in the lore video directly after the Wither Storm Saga, how Moon said if he ever gets into an episode like Beta-10 again, that Sun get someone else immediately, because he doesn't want to hurt Sun?

Remember when in the video "Eclipse TRAPPED Sun and Moon in The BACKROOMS! in VRCHAT" the light suddenly went out, and Sun went into a panic, the way Moon gently guides his brother towards the light? Calmly and softly saying "Over there, over there"?

Remember when in the video "The DEATH of SUN and MOON in VRCHAT", how Moon just quietly says "I don't wanna lose you"? Or when he cuts off an anxious and unsure Sun, to say "I love you too brother"? When he says to Eclipse in front of Sun, "You are gonna take away the only thing, the only person I care about"? When he says that Lunar isn't fighting him for control, because he knows the moment Sun is gone, Moon will just give up? His quiet admitance that he did not want Sun to think less of him? How when he promises Sun, that he will get him back, they are holding hands? Something that Moon hates, and he will freely do for his brother, because his brother is more important than his own discomfort. Because even if he did mistakes, he loves Sun more than anything.

Was he perfect? No. No he wasn't. He did terrible things, for no reason at all at times. But he wasn't just a monster. He was a person placed in a terrible situation, with a code in his head telling him to do horrible things, and before KC, we did not know it was possible to go against one's nature, one's coding, one's very own being, and yet, Moon fought his killcode. He fought what was essentialy a loosing battle, and came out battered and bruised, with victories that were only temporary. But he still did it, because there was a person (later persons), who wanted him around. And because of that he made damn sure to fight his nature everytime.

Could he have been better? Yes.

Did he treat Sun terribly? At times yes!

Were some of his actions truly horrible? They were.

But was he a heartless monster, who cared for no one? No. No, he wasn't.

He was a person, trying to live, with everything stacked against him and his brother from the very begining. And he immensely fucked up. No question about that.

But he did care

(Sorry about the long, depressive post lol. Got into a mood, and wanted to get the depression off my chest for a bit. But yeah, I love this guy. He was funky. The New Moon is funky. Sun is funky. Lunar is funky. KC is funky. Eclipse is funky. Ruin is funky. Bloodmoon is funky. New Bloodmoon (I call that one Harvest(moon), and yes, I differentiate between them, cuz they be different. sue me) is funky. Earth is funky. Solar is funky. Solar Flare is funky. Everyone is funky. And I love them all.)

#sun and moon show #tsams #the sun and moon show #sams #sams moon #tsams moon #MemoryTimeswithSunray #MemoryMonday #sorry I fell off the memory cliff #it'll happen again <3 #btw that “Everyone is funky.” part doesn't include the Creator #screw him #moon beloved #“MemoryMoonday” lol #this is just what i can remember off the top of my head

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deathmetalunicorn1 · 10 months

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Part 1 and 2 of Morticia Reader with Yandere Rudra (Gomez 2.0), Tesla (Gomez 3.0), Shiva (+Wives), Hercules (Gomez 4.0), Thor, Lu Bu, Indra, Ares (Gomez 5.0), Hermes and Sasaki (I can see him screaming he gives up in part 2 and tries to run)

I also bet a 100 bucks Reader would scare Shiva and his wives with her stamina (Along with everyone else, questioning if she’s actually Human)

-Beautiful, dark, deadly, passionate, loving, unique, all were words used to describe you and all of them were true.

-You were like the moon against the dark night sky, surrounded by pitch black darkness, bright but eerie and quiet.

-You found enjoyment in the dark and macabre, but to you, they were normal, beautiful things, skulls, poisonous flowers, dangerous plants, death, how lovely.

-Many thought you were odd by the way you dressed and carried yourself, always wearing elegant black gowns paired with matching jewelry with spider or coffin motifs. However, sometimes you would wear different colors when it was warmer out, just a slightly lighter shade of black with an umbrella, you didn’t need any unwanted color in your complexion.

-Your tone was always even and deadpan, never showing emotions the way others do, so nobody could ever tell if you were joking or not about feeding someone to your kitty-cat, an actual lion that you kept around who was like a housecat with you and those he knew, but vicious and violent with strangers.

-Many made comments that you would be attractive if you were ‘normal’ but where’s the fun in that? It’s much more fun to keep others guessing- keeping them on your toes.

-Speaking of keeping others on their toes, if anyone was to visit your private greenhouse, they would need to watch where they step or risk losing a few.

-Your garden was notorious for being filled with poisonous and carnivorous plants, and not just little things like little Venus Fly Traps, no you had a giant 4 ½ foot one that would eat people if they got close enough if you hadn’t fed them yet!!

-However, due to their healthy fear of your garden, you didn’t have many visitors, which you liked, less of a risk of your babies getting trampled or damaged.

-Your lover liked you the way you were, you were unapologetically unique, and he loved it, you were so different from other women and that’s what drew him to you.

-At first he did think you were a little odd, intimidating was a word he liked to use, as you weren’t afraid to speak your mind and there was always an air around you, a silent warning, but as time went on, he fell hard for you.

-Rudra- Found you absolutely stunning, you were unapologetically different, something he admired deeply about you, you didn’t care what others thought about you, but you were also kind to them in return, offering kind words instead. He liked that you were calm, as he needed someone calm because he dealt with enough with Shiva’s antics and you were the perfect partner. He could just come while you were reading or knitting and kneel before you and lay his head on your lap and stay there for hours if you let him. He was respectful to you and demanded the same from others, he wouldn’t hesitate to throw hands with anyone who would dare insult you in front of him, even if you do tell him it isn’t needed.

-Nikola- He was a bachelor all his life back on earth, finding women to be something unobtainable, believing he would never be good enough for them, and when he first laid eyes upon you, he almost collapsed to his knees. You were beautiful- the very definition of perfection itself, he couldn’t look away from you. When you saw this stranger on his knees outside your garden, you came over to inquire if he was alright, thinking he had been poisoned by one of your babies before he tried to speak, but only a sound like a deflating balloon came out. He ran off, red-faced and leaving you confused, but you quickly understood when he returned the next day with a bouquet of red roses, unable to look you in the eye. He was rather cute, being so flustered, but you made it worse by taking his arm, asking him to walk with you around your garden. He would follow you into the pits of hell if you asked him to.

-Shiva + Wives- All four of them were thrown off by you at first, you were so different, so unique, but so ethereal looking, and Shiva led the charge, wanting to know more about you. Kali instantly liked you, seeing your home and garden, seeing all of the dangerous and poisonous plants you had in your gardens, and you grew close to her after learning she was a goddess of death. Parvati was a little slower to warm up to you, a bit intimidated by you, but she quickly learned that you were so elegant and gentle and while she was your opposite, the two of you got along easily. Durga found you hysterical, your sense of humor never failed to make her laugh after saying, “I long to be looked at like all women to, with fear in the eyes of men.” Shiva was instantly taken with you, wanting to make you his fourth wife. Shiva loved you the way you were, he wouldn’t change a single thing about you, but at the same time, he appreciated that you wouldn’t make him or his wives change for you either. You all had your own hobbies and likes and if they wanted to learn, you would teach them, and in turn, they would teach you when you would ask.

-Hercules- He actually met you thanks to your kitty cat, your precious cat had gotten out and Hercules returned him to you, after reading the tag on his collar. While initially worried about you, as you seemed to be a petite woman, he was stunned when he saw your vicious and violent lion turn into a total cuddly baby with you. Hercules was curious about you, wanting to know more about you, you looked so different compared to other people, dressing in all black, even in summer, and snipping blossoms off your roses, only wanting to keep the thorns. You had an air of mystery around you, one that seemed to grab him by the neck, dragging him into your web of darkness, but he was happy to follow you, wanting more of the mystery you were offering.

-Thor- Met you through Loki, after Thor mentioned he was looking for a plant that was poisonous, but was used to make a rare medicine, and Odin asked him to find some of this plant. Loki knew you would be the best person to come to and when they found themselves outside your greenhouse, Thor froze, seeing you for the first time. You were so dark and mysterious but there was something else about you, something dangerous, but you were calm and elegant, even when you shooed Loki away from pestering your carnivorous plants, “If you lose a finger I won’t be patching you up again.” Loki pouted up at you, “Don’t be so cold Y/N~~” Thor was the one who tossed the troublemaker out and you were a bit surprised but offered a small smile, “Now then, you mentioned you were after something in my garden?” Thor nodded, taken by your calm and stoic nature.

-Lu Bu- He had met a lot of weird people in his life and when he first saw you, you quickly went to nearly the top of the list. You were dressed like you were mourning someone, you surrounded yourself with weird curiosities and carnivorous plants and a freaking lion!! He had never met a woman like you before, however… you piqued his interest. He wanted to know more about you, finding himself insnared by you, you were kind and polite with him, finding his lust for combat admirable, as he liked to fight. You weren’t like other women who would panic and faint at the sight of blood, you seemed to enjoy it, finding beauty in death. You sure were weird, but you were very beautiful, and Lu Bu quickly grew attached to you, not wanting to let you go.

-Indra- He had no idea there was a woman like you out there, you looked so gloomy and elegant all at the same time, you were so beautiful, but also intimidating. He could see how other men would look at you in fear, but you seemed to love it, crave it even, and Indra was the only man brave enough to approach you. He fell quickly for you, you were mysterious, elegant, and insanely beautiful, you were also well worded, you could hold conversations for hours with him, and you were able to keep his attention. He was notorious for having a short attention span, he would lose interest quickly, you were the first woman who grabbed him by the neck and held on tightly and you weren’t letting him go, not that he wanted you to.

-Ares- He saw you walking around under the pale moon, holding a black lace umbrella over you, shielding yourself from the rays. You looked like a demoness, dark, beautiful, and deadly and Ares couldn’t tear his eyes away from you. He followed after you, following down the pathway after you and before his brain could comprehend what he was doing, he called out to you. You were so pale, so beautiful, you looked like the moon itself against the night sky, he instantly felt his throat go dry as he stammered before you, trying to form his words. When you smiled he instantly fell for you, and you quickly grew fond of this giant man, he was affectionate and loyal, he reminded you of a dog, but Ares quickly wormed his way into your heart.

-Hermes- Adored you, you were beautiful, mysterious and incredibly intimidating, how could he not love you?! Zeus found you to be a bit odd, but Hermes adored you, he found you relaxing to be around. The two of you could talk for hours about music and books, comparing teas and baked goods, and the two of you just vibed with each other. Hermes loved spending time with you, especially in your gardens, as you taught him how to tend to your precious babies, however, he was still hesitant about dealing with your kitty cat. Hermes loved to waltz with you, putting on music and he would happily dance the day away with you, feeling the happiest when he had you in his arms.

-Kojiro- When he first met you, Kojiro’s first words to you were, “Are you a demon?” which just made you laugh while he was red faced, stuttering out apologies to you, however you weren’t upset, you were flattered by his words, telling him that they were lovely. He was taken aback by your words, seeing that you weren’t bothered, and he quickly grew more curious about you, wanting to know more about you. You were gentle and kind, but also very wise and mysterious and he found himself wanting to be by your side at all times. Kojiro’s focus and determination while training was breathtaking, his hard work had such fruitful results, it was like your plants, they took lots of time and effort, and Kojiro was the same way. You adored him for his drive and he loved you for your mystery.

-One thing that (Love) learned, once you became intimate with him, you were not as gentle in bed as you were during the day, you were like a hellion, scratching at his back in the heat of passion, demanding more and more from him.

-In bed, gone was the elegant and levelheaded Y/N, instead you were a succubus, wanting everything he had to give you and even more, even willing to go as far as taking it yourself if he was unable to do so.

-He couldn’t understand it when you could be up and walking the next day like nothing while he could barely feel his legs, and if he could they were shaking.

-He loved it however, because you would drown him in your passion and your love, doting on him so gently in the afterglow, kissing him softly, whispering gently on how wonderful he was to you. He wouldn’t trade it for the world.

-(Love) looked down at you, seeing you still asleep, your hair creating a halo around you, you were his angel of darkness, beautiful but deadly.

-A soft kiss to your cheek roused you and you smiled gently up at him, “My love~ you were so- so unhinged last night. I’ve never seen you like that before. You were like some desperate, howling demon. How you frightened me~ do it again!”

-Rudra- He couldn’t help but grin, leaning away from you just slightly, paling sightly, “I’m not sure if I can move at the moment, my love. Maybe we can try later after some food.” You smiled softly and crawled over to loom over him before settling into his arms, “Well then, let’s get to feeding~” he put his hand on your forehead, pushing you back, “Oh no you don’t- you’re not tricking me again!” you pouted lightly, and he pecked your lips before getting up to go and get some food.

-Nikola- Stammered comically, unable to form words, his hands holding you back by your arms as you tried to lunge at him, “I-I need a break Y/N! I can’t keep up with you!!” you smiled down at him, watching him fight before you cooed softly, “Well then- we should work on building your stamina then.” He smiled weakly up at you before allowing you to rest against his bare chest, hugging you close, sighing softly, thinking you were going to give him a break until he felt your teeth and lips nibbling at his neck.

-Shiva + Wives- You stamina was inhuman, even for the four of them, and they were gods and you had drained them all dry. They couldn’t keep up with you! They all shared a look before Kali, Durga, and Parvati threw Shiva at you, “We’re going for food!” you licked your lips down at Shiva after straddling his hips as he panicked, “Wait! Don’t leave me here!! You traitors!!” their laughter was heard as they went to go and find food. Shiva looked back up at you, trapped before his eyes narrowed, “Fine- I’ll give you what you want!!” delight flashed across your eyes as he grabbed at your hips to get started.

-Hercules- He reached a hand up to cup the side of your face, stroking his thumb across your cheek, “Food first- we worked off our dinner and our midnight snack. If we want to continue we need to eat first.” He pulled you down and kissed you softly and you hummed quietly, pressing a bit harder and he instantly lifted you up with his strength, holding you above his head, “None of that now- you’re not getting out of this without eating first.” You pouted but agreed as he set you down beside him.

-Thor- He learned early on that you were insatiable, with a sex drive for days, something that he had to work on, to match your stamina, else you would suck him dry. Normally he wouldn’t mind it, but certain times of the month were you feistier than others, and he had to learn how to put you down quickly to save himself. However… you grew aware of this and now your stamina was matching his own and now he had to deal with the consequences of his own actions.

-Lu Bu- Has stamina for days, however in bed you were quickly proving to be almost too much for him, he was always up for a challenge, and you were giving him that, but after the third straight night of going from sundown to sunup, his poor back was beginning to feel the burn and he felt like he was going to fall apart. Just groaned and managed to hug you close, pinning you down and fell back asleep, leaving you unable to move, making you pout before you cuddled him and went back to sleep.

-Indra- Immediately put an arm around your shoulders, pulling you back down into his side, pinning you there, “I’m not moving for at least the next hour! I can’t even feel my legs! You’re gonna be the death of me.” you cooed softly, nuzzling your nose against his cheek, “You know how to flatter a woman.” He snorted with laughter, but was true to his word, he wasn’t moving, and he wasn’t going to allow you to move either.

-Ares- His eyelid twitched lightly, gawking down at you as you batted your eyes up at him, he couldn’t believe how much energy you had. He moved to stand to get out of bed and you lunged, wrapping your arms around his neck, pressing yourself to his bare back, “You’re not going to leave me all alone are you~~?” he sent you a weak grin, “Y/N- I literally can’t feel anything below my hips. It’s gonna fall off if you keep attacking me like this!” you cooed, running your nail down his neck, “You make me sound like some sort of fiend~ but you’ve never told me no.” he twitched under your affections, swallowing hard, he could sense his doom incoming.

-Hermes- Pressed a soft kiss to your lips and smiled as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him down into you before he spoke, “If we’re going to do this, first we need some food, and I need an ice pack for my back. I think I pulled something going so hard last night.” You nodded, pressing your lips to his temple and he sighed in content, remaining there with you for a moment or two, basking in your affections for a few moments longer.

-Kojiro- His eyelid twitched before he instantly tried to roll over to run away but you lunged at him, hugging him from behind, “Don’t run from me my love~” he turned to you, his eyes wide and face pale, “I-I can’t do it!! I’m not a young man anymore!!” you licked your lips, looking like a hunter, “Don’t run my love~ I like to chase.” Anyone passing by your home could hear the scream of a man, begging for help, but then again, you didn’t have neighbors and you rarely got visitors. How lucky for you~

#record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror rudra #ror nikola tesla #ror shiva #ror heracles #ror thor #ror lu bu #ror indra #ror ares #ror hermes #ror kojiro sasaki

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yandere-wishes · 1 year

Text

⋆ ⋆ ℕ𝕖𝕨 𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥 ⋆ ⋆

Masterlist for newer, more polished stories. You can look up older stories/fics HERE. There’s a wider selection there

💜Honkai Star Rail

▹▹Blade

ɴᴇᴏɴ ɴɪɢʜᴛꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ɴɪɢʜᴛᴍᴀʀᴇꜱ

It's late and you're tired. Trapped within a dreamlike trance trying to figure out if you're sick or just in love. Although to Blade you're just confused and need a little more persuading of how much he loves you.

💜Genshin impact

Racing Au (Wriothesley, Neuvillette, kamisato Ayato)

Some racing snippets from the tracks w/ our fav genshin men.

▹▹Dottore

1:00 am

Dottore isn't the best at words, especially when it's past midnight and you both have an assignment due first thing in the morning. Yet as the clock tics onwards, he grows a bit bolder.

Comedic Tragedy

Dottore is lovesick and desperate. Reader just wants a life away from from the Akademiya. Neither get what they expected.

▹▹Childe

2:00 am

The Tsaritsa sends two of her finest assassins to take out the head of the Kamisato clan. It's funny how repressed emotions and forgotten memories resurface at the worst times.

▹▹Neuvillette

Do Not Weep Hydro Dragon

There's a crack in Neuvillette's heart that bares your name. He sheds a tear for you each day. Yet once you return to Fontaine with your fiance. The cracks and tears begin to grow.

▹▹Freminet

Sinking into the Depths

Freminet is desperate to take you diving with him. You are rather reluctant.

▹▹ Baizhu

Yandere Headcanons

Just some headcanons setting up a longer story.~💜

Sweet like morning-glory

There's a melody humming within your bones. A tune Baizhu strums with his needles and drugs. The ballade sings of a love more deadly than any toxin.

▹▹ Rosaria

TBA

▹▹ Lynette

Yandere Headcanons

Yandere Lynette is such a conniving sweetheart!!

▹▹ Wriothesley

WereWolf

Heritage pricks Wriothesley like a valley of thrones, it's unnerving to find someone with the same pains.

Yadere!Werewolf! Headcanons

Wriothesley has a secret...it's a pleasant surprise to find someone who harbors the same burden.

💜 Obey me

▹▹ Leviathan

Self-loathing

Levi’s caught in a trance, tempted and bewitched by the devildom’s new resident. Someone who’s self hatred rivals his own. Someone who might just comprehend his pain...

💜 Twisted wonderland

▹▹ Leona Kingscholar

My Queen My Prey

You and Leona are opposites that keep getting in each other's ways. And yet there isn't a single damn thing Leona wouldn't do for you.

▹▹Idia Shroud

Dr.Frankenstein

Idia wants to prove the world wrong. To show that there is more to life than good and bad, villains and heroes. But somewhere along the way, he falls in love with what he is trying to prove.

Just Like The Gods

Idia falls in love, death and destruction soon follow. He can’t really help it, it’s in his blood.

▹▹General

How To Be A Villain In Seven easy Steps (Riddle, Leona, Azul)

It’s easy to be the villain when life has already casted you for the role from the day you were born...

💜Record Of Ragnarok

▹▹ Nikola Tesla

Sleepless

Tesla doesn't sleep, can't sleep. He has something he needs to finish, something to fulfill. Maybe for once in his miserable existence, his inventions can be acknowledged for what they truly are. You're trying to prove yourself before the world comes to an end. And if that means absorbing every form of toxicity your childhood crush has to offer then so be it.

💜Jujutsu Kaisen

▹▹Sukuna

MONSTERS

Monsters aren’t born they’re made, but Sukuna stumbles across the rare exception…

💜Marvel

▹▹ Miles Morales

Imposter Syndrome

Miles is the villain. You are the hero. You two shouldn't be in love...

The Perfect Girl

Somewhere along the line the villain won and the hero lost. Now your life is nothing more than a cautionary tale.

The Spider's Web

You are a hero, you feel it within your bones. Calamity may strike and villains may rise. But you are still a hero, it's time to start acting like one.

▹▹ Miguel O’hara

Comic Book Love

You finally realize that you and Miguel are stuck inside a comic book romance.

Spider Love Bite

Miguel loves you, this you know. But neither the story nor the hero ever stops long enough to wonder if you love him too.

▹▹Michael Morbius

Late Night Calls

Sometimes Morbius is lucid enough to remember your name...

💜Barbie

▹▹Ken

He's Just Ken

You're just Barbie, perfect on the outside, dead on the inside. He's just Ken, neither perfect on the outside nor on the inside.

💜Moriarty The Patriot

▹▹William James

Anomaly

Reader is an anomaly. A noblewoman of foreign descent. She doesn't belong here. But oh how she wishes to burn the world down just like William.

💜Star Wars

▹▹General

Our Pretty Little Girl (Yandere!Anakin Skywalker x Reader x Yandere! Darth Maul)

You try to escape from two fearsome Sith Lords. Surprisingly they take it rather well.

▹▹Darth Maul

Yandere! Darth Maul Headcanons

What's Darth Maul like as a yandere? How does he treat his darling?

Yandere Darth Maul Headcanons (Ft. Darth Talon)

You're Maul's little doll. Trapped between two scary sith lords.

▹▹Anakin Skywalker

TBA

💜Dune

▹▹General

I love you, It's ruining my life

When they realize they love

💜Miscellaneous

Superstar AU

He's the hottest new talent and he's only got eyes for you. Based on the movie Priscilla.

▹▹Dracula

A Confession letter

Dear Dracula...

▹▹ Monster High

Yandere! Monster High Ghouls

There's something ancient within you. Lost and forgotten. You're an eldritch creature living amongst monsters. A piece of you lives within each of them. And a piece of each of them lives inside you...

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