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#tbh that last question says a LOT about me
thedreadvampy · 1 year
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sorry I'm on one now. Narnia is one of my Big Rant triggers.
but like. I would be lying if I said I didn't love Narnia
(everything except the Horse and His Boy, which a) even as a tiny kid made me uncomfortable with how fucking racist it is (literally there is ONE. ONE. character of colour who isn't evil, selfish, greedy and violent. even when you're 5 and white and don't really understand racism it's like. sorry there are just no nice people in this whole country? and every Narnian is lovely?) and b) is just fucking DULL partly bc of the 2 dimensional racist caricatures populating the world)
but I can't pretend for a second that it isn't specifically built around a Christian theology that's explicitly racist, hierarchical, supremacist, colonialist and The Bits I Like Least Of Anglicanism
and my FAVOURITE books in the series (except the Silver Chair which tbh is WAY less theological and way more mythology-nerd) are the first and last, which are by far the most explicitly Christian. even more so than TLTWATW.
and I can just about stand by the Magician's Nephew bc it's mostly just a mix of Christian creation myth and CS Lewis's sci fi interests in the esoteric and multiverses and it honestly feels fine. but my all time favourite most iconic Narnia book is The Last Battle and I just. cannot. justify it for a second from a political or philosophical standpoint.
it's got it all bc it's the book where Lewis is like ok hold up let me lay out explicitly what my theology is. and what he thinks it's important to say is:
Almost all Muslims are bad and evil
They worship Satan by doing Bad Evil Deeds to please him
There are a couple of Good Muslims who do good deeds. they need to be brought to the light, understand that the voice calling them to do good deeds is the Christian god, and they too can achieve the kingdom of heaven
Some people will use Christianity as a mask for exploitation and mistreatment. They are bad and their faith is false (ok fine)
...and they're doing that because they're CONSPIRING WITH THE EVIL MUSLIMS TO OPPRESS GOOD CHRISTIANS
...and THAT'S THE ONLY REASON ANYONE WOULD TELL YOU THAT GOD AND ALLAH ARE DIFFERENT NAMES FOR THE SAME GOD. because they're either conning you or because they've been misled and can't really think for themselves.
DID I MENTION. THAT MUSLIMS ARE EVIL AND TRYING TO BRING DOWN CHRISTIANS.
and other than the GOD AREN'T MUSLIMS JUST THE WORST of it all, he also goes back over to more fully explain several points he's made throughout the series, such as:
white Christian public school kids are the god ordained leaders of the world and attempts to think otherwise are heretical
god places people where they need to be to serve his purpose
free will is largely an illusion - your only choice is faith or chaos, and as a godly person your actions are preordained
the problem is though. he's kind of a really good character writer? and in The Last Battle he pulls out most of his best classics (hi Reepicheep! hi Frank! hi Jill!) and gives us a whole wealth of really fun new characters (Tirian and Jewel, Emeth, Puzzle, Shift, Griffle and Ginger are all just SO FUN) and it's such a solid adventure. for me it's hands down the most FUN Narnia to read and an effective and affecting end to the series.
but like. god its unjustifiably fucked philosophy is baked into every single character and event. it's so hard to ignore. it's my favourite book in the series. it's the book that makes me angriest. it's everything right with Narnia and everything wrong with Narnia. I like it cause it asks me to engage critically with Lewis' philosophy and I hate it cause it requires me to engage critically with Lewis' philosophy.
in conclusion, Narnia is a land of contrasts. also occasionally brownface.
#red said#i love these books. i love the last battle especially.#fuck me they're awful philosophically though#they were probably the first chapter books i read when i was 3 or 4. they are such a big part of my life.#and I've always loved them and i still do. I'm so fond of them.#and part of that is inextricable from the Christianity of them. i think there's something really fun and interesting in the fusion of#christian myth and celtic paganism and classical myth and arthuriana and new age mysticism and sci fi multiverse stuff#like it's not. new to blend those things. but lewis is such a nerd about all of them and he blends them up in a really flavourful way#and also i think like as a kid. the utter claroty with which These Are Metaphors About Theology And Philosophy#really worked for me even though I disagreed with most of it. because it kind of wants to engage with you directly as a child#it is. to me. pretty honest about its intentions. and it digs into some moderately complex ideas for a young audience.#like they're parables not morality plays. the Goddier ones are inviting you to think and engage in a conversation about the ideas#which tbh. not a lot of kid's books did at the time and age i was reading them?#they wanted me to be thinking about the whys and hows of morality. like obviously Lewis SUPER has an opinion on the Right Answers#(i would usually. say we're diametrically opposed on most conclusions but then i was rooting for Jadis' army in LWW)#but idk Lewis's theology is interesting. he's very much pro faith and determinism but he ALSO thinks you should question stuff i think#like. it's often kind of self-contradictory but the books are pretty pro asking questions pushing back straying from the path#as long as you come back#and the last battle particularly is really clear that you're not doing a good job of engaging with faith if you don't think about it#like other than MUSLIMS ARE EVIL AND BAD the main message of the last battle is.#if you don't think critically about faith then someone else will think for you and fuck you over#tirian is our hero bc he has a personal and often uncertain relationship with faith that means he refuses to get swept up in the crowd#puzzle is painted as someone who is too scared of conflict to voice his concerns#he's prepared to believe he's too stupid to have his own questions or relationship with faith and so he becomes a tool of the powerful#because he is told to trust the teachings of the church not his own heart#now. do i think this is philosophically good? generally yes but it also props up the I'M A BOLD TRUTHTELLER AGAINST THE ESTABLISHMENT#reactionary tendency. and it's written by a guy whose Unpopular Truthtelling is partly 'Allah is Satan' so. grains of salt.#buuuuut. it's probably why it resonates a lot with people like me or my mum who as kids often felt constrained or patronised#by the way adults approach obedience and blind faith#like. Lewis is advocating for FAITH. he DOESN'T think that faith should be uncritical or without discomfort
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8 + 21 music asks :3
which song is stuck in your head?
currently its switching between The Only Exception by Paramore and an old percy jackson fansong that i used to be OBSESSED with amd jist recently remembered called Child of Death by Gio Navas (all her pjo fansongs were like the soundtrack of my childhood lmao she's amazing)
what are 5 wongs you would put on a movie score?
- Northern Downpour by P!ATD
- Fake Out by Fall Out Boy
- No Control by Set It Off (specifically like a slowed down instrumental version of the chorus would be great in a film score)
- The Ends and the Means by Robby Hecht (perfect song for a somber montage)
- Exitlude by The Killers (perfect for an ending montage/fade to credits moment)
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onocleqs · 1 year
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can't fucking believe vent is still down. where else am i gonna yell about being ill
#anyway it is Day Two and. i feel better in some ways but worse in others#had the worlds most disrupted night of sleep and now i'm coughing a lot more than yesterday and it sucks#but my throat feels less sore for sure. feels like my body is fighting this thing off super hard 💪💪💪💪 shame about the full body aching#and overall lack of energy. ooouugghhh and the lost voice of course. but this always fucking happens#i'm gonna have to pass on games night tonight if i'm still coughing a lot and/or still missing my voice#but aaaauugghhh the love of my friends will surely heal me like nothing else. unless they make me laugh and send me into a coughing fit#rambling#my god yeah thats one of the worst parts of being ill. cant watch anything that makes me laugh. im fucking dying of boredom here#sure there's other stuff to watch but no funnies and no video games when that's all i want rn. havent watched any more flapjack in DAYS#it's nowhere near as bad as covid so this is entirely unnecessary but i am once again getting thr urge to document my symptoms#with a god damn spreadsheet. but it's not as complex at all so eh.#i can't say too much about how much better i'm feeling just yet tbh bc i'm still back in bed hfkdhgkdh i can walk sure#but i need to go downstairs and make breakfast soon which is the REAL first hurdle#also the question of am i ready for toast again or do i need to stick to porridge just to be safe#not gonna lie. i didn't love the noodles i had yesterday so i'm wondering if i'll have the appetite for something else#i want a sandwich so fucking bad but i don't want to eat dry bread at the same time. aaauuggghhh#my sibling offered me a hot chocolate last night and i had to turn that down bc chocolate plus cold for me is a big no#but aaauugghhh a nice warm drink probably would’ve been rlly nice#i return once again to announce that got damn! i feel notivesbly better than i didn an hour ago and my voice is like 30% back!#which means that by tonight i might very well be at a functional enough level to hang out with friends after all#i can always dip if my energy levels tank again or whatever but like honestly hanging out with them is like. i need that#the last two days havent been great and i miss them and we have a lot to talk about so yeah i will do everything in my power#to be there tonight. but i will not force myself or push myself too far. bc i am the king of self care 💪💪💪#god sorry back again but. it continues to fascinate me how any kind of illness affects me in the same ways consistently regardless of what#kind of illness it is??? right now i have whats mainly a cough which is honestly rare for me when i get ill#it's usually more in the nose department and sometimes the throat but rarely the chest#and yet 9 out of 10 times i lose my voice. i Always struggle with low energy (altho thats a problem outside of being ill too jfdjgdhfhd)#have a hard time falling or staying asleep and i get nauseous if i sleep laying down enough#but also i am the king of hard and fast aka i get like 24 terrible hours and then recovery is super quick. i'll be back to 100% health in#less than a week. my poor fucking step dad has been in stage one for a WEEK it's really awful. but i have the power of youth on my side 💪
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23meteorstreet · 1 year
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the fact that charlie has been eating spray cheese instead of actual cheese this entire time makes every mention of him eating massive amounts of cheese 10x more disgusting
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sanstropfremir · 2 years
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Hi! As a fellow Humanities Person (sociologist) I've been really enjoying your critical (in an academic sense!) analysis of kpop & the Korean entertainment industry! I'm curious- how do you think social media has impacted kpop? I remember you said in an answer to a previous ask that aespa's choreo seems to have been created with TikTok in mind. And I feel like social media has made it even more difficult for idols to have a private life- like NCT is posting like behind the scenes videos OF behind the scenes videos and I can't help but to think that it seems like there's hardly a moment in their lives where they're NOT being filmed.
thank you! i'm not an authority by any measure but it is fun to speculate/extrapolate and talk about these things with people!
hmm. actually i don't think social media has made it that much more difficult for idols to have a private life, at least in the way that i think you're talking about. yes absolutely it has made idols need to be more careful, bc everyone has a phone now, but for things like behind the scenes content, that's just still just work. they would have been there even if there was no cameras, because things like recording or dance rehearsals or other content filmings are all work hours, not their private life. they know full well that their job is to be a public figure, so when they show up to do work, no matter what it is or if it's being filmed, that's work. has social media made it so that they have to do more things that they didn't have to before? yes absolutely, but i don't think it's that big of an issue for a lot of them. most idols really do care about the communication they have with their fans and showing them more the parts of the process is something that is actually interesting (in my opinion at least), much more so than just getting selfies. i think accounts like the shinee managers (shinee_atoz) are a great way to give a bit more personal context to the official content that comes out (which is what key said abt it when he pitched it) and it doesn't infringe on idols' (or the managers!!) private lives at all.
in terms of aespa's choreo being made for tiktok, that's just going back to the old methods from first and second gen to get a song to go viral because of the point choreo/dance moves. and it did work, next level was probably the most recognizable choreo last year (other than rollin, which was actually old school viral). in fact the whole doing choreo challenges on tiktok is just an evolution of the whole reason point choreo exists in the first place.
#there's a lot of ways social media has changed kpop. probably too many to list#but biggest are probably in marketing accessibility and fan communities#tbh social media has made it difficult for EVERYONE to have private lives. not just idols#like its definitely made people in the periphery of idols have more of a struggle bc fans will stalk their social medias#maybe a better line of inquiry is about how social media has made it so that there are much less clear consent boundaries#on when and where you can be filmed. but my point still stands in this case bc they're likely given warning#/already know when there's going to be bts filming happening#there's still so much that we dont see of idols' lives. like the stuff we do see is the stuff they choose to show us#this is a pretty broad question because it's so integrated into normal everyday life that when you try to dig into it in one aspect#like in kpop. you have to then interrogate how it affects EVERYTHING#kpop questions#text#answers#fundamentally it does come down to that everyone is just expected to show more. not idols i mean literally everybody#like my mom berated me on the phone last week for not posting on instagram saying 'people want to know youre alive'#no they dont mom. i dont need to post on instagram i'm perfectly fine not having ppl know what im doing#and thats not even getting into all the fucked up shit around tiktok & filming ppl in public. i dont even wanna touch that w a ten ft pole#yea. very entangled topic
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Paying For Someone Else's Mistake - Logan Sargeant
Request from @monacosprince - tbh i’m so mad and williams for what they’re doing to logan! can you please write a fic where logan is upset and self doubting over the situation and reader helps him???
Ngl reader is going to be an angry, overprotective little girlfriend in this. If you don't like that vibe, I'm sorry but I feel like Logan needs a girlfriend who will stand up for him when he's feeling down. She's a little bit...bad-tempered shall we say. We are also going to feature bestie!Oscar being a good friend bc despite popular belief I'm sure he's there for Logan to make sure he's ok.
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When it comes to dating Logan, y/n is not afraid to use her voice where Logan might try to be quiet. He's got an image as a patriotic America but he's such a soft soul and so isolated as a driver on the grid. Y/n can't help but let a more protective over him.
Y/n and Logan started dating towards the end of the season last year. She's been his main support system in giving him the confidence her gained back after losing it so much last season. He absolutely adores her and he would do anything for her. But she does a hell of a lot in return for him and he's given a lot of credit to her publicly for everything because he isn't ashamed to admit that she's genuinely that amazing to him.
"Hey, I was wondering where you'd got to." Logan smiles as y/n appears in his drivers room ahead of FP1.
"I always here when you need me." Y/n states brightly moving to kiss him. "How you feeling?"
"Good. Have you been enjoying the sun? You're warm." Logan comments making her laugh a little as he places the back of his hand to her cheek.
"Yeah, it's nice out. Before we go to Japan we should get ourselves down the the beach for a day or something." Y/n grins before Logan's trainer, Ben appears smiling at the two. "Time to go?"
"Time to go." Ben confirms making her gesture for Logan to go ahead, but he links their hands and pulls her with him as Ben leads them.
-
Y/n felt bad for Alex. She knows Logan has anxiety about crashing and causing damage to the car sometimes means he plays it on the safer side or if he does push himself like he wants to and it doesn't work out, then she makes sure he remembers that everyone makes mistakes. Even Max managed to give his floor a beating today.
Obviously y/n isn't involved in the debriefs and meetings following practices but James and the team need to talk with the boys about a problem.
Ben appears before Logan does and he looks like he's just been kicked in the stomach.
"What's going on?" Y/n frowns but before he can answer, Logan appears looking disheveled and like he's been trying to stop himself from crying. "Baby? What's happening?"
"Nothing. I'm tired, just want to get out of here." Logan states which raises alarms anyway because Logan is never that eager to leave. Even tired and jet lagged.
"Probably best to go back to the hotel and rest." Ben confirms making y/n's frowns deepen. They're not telling her something and she doesn't like being kept in the dark.
Logan all but rips his suit off as if it's burning him to wear it and actually he does tear his fireproofs in the rush to get them off.
Y/n has to bite her tongue to not demand an explanation. She feels like she's sort of on the verge of stomping her foot like a toddler and shouting for someone to say something. There's nothing more upsetting than seeing Logan so upset.
They finally get out and when they do, they pass Oscar who stops them to talk to his long term friend.
"Hey, mate. How's it going?" Oscar smiles, him in a good mood since it's his home race.
"Hey, sorry man. We're just heading off to the hotel. Y/n doesn't feel well." Logan lies annoyingly well, but his tone is tight and strained which makes Oscar's gaze flick to y/n.
"Sorry, you feel better y/n. I'll see you tomorrow mate." Oscar nods but Logan is already tugging her away and the questioning look on Oscar's face making her shrug in a silent conversation.
Whatever has happened, Logan doesn't want to talk about it. At least not right in this moment. In fact they get to the hotel and she's given a kiss before he mumbles that he's going to shower.
Y/n huffs sitting down with a frown before she decides to change and order room service. Which actually arrives before Logan comes out the shower. But when he does she decides to finally force it out of him, whether she has to poke him into a corner to do it.
"Logan, please tell me what's going on." Y/n pleads deciding to try the softer approach since his eyes are bloodshot and it's obvious he has been crying in the shower. He'd never want her to see it because he hates the idea of her seeing him in such a weak position. "I can't help you if you don't tell me."
"James decided to give Alex my car...they don't have the parts to repair his and he wants Alex in the race." Logan states clearing trying not to choke on his words.
"He what?" Y/n frowns actually retracting back in disgust and trying to figure out if she really just heard him wrong. "Say that again."
"Baby-"
"No. No. That's-That's not ok. What the hell?" Y/n frowns getting up and beginning to pace. "Was I watching the wrong car when I saw a driver send a Williams into the wall? I don't remember you climbing out the smashed up car."
"Baby, it's-"
"Don't you dare say this is ok. This is not ok. I-" Y/n cuts herself short about to say something that would only add to his upset which is pretty visible really. "You deserve better, Logan. They have no right to do that."
"I know. But they've done it for the better of the team. I understand. Alex is the stronger driver-"
"Alex sent his fucking car into a wall! No other team would do this. If he can't keep his car on the track knowing the team doesn't have the means to fix it. Then that is not for him to get to continue! It is not your mistake to pay for." Y/n snaps not angry at Logan but she can't contain it. She softens a little, her body unable to fight the instinct to hug him tightly. "You are worth so much more than how they treat you."
Logan sighs resting his chin on top of her head as she rests in on his chest.
"I just need you right now." Logan whispers making her close her eyes hoping to prevent tears that are building.
Y/n hates this. Right now she'd go as far to say she hates the whole team for hurting Logan like this.
"We can eat, get in bed and cuddle?" Y/n offers moving her head back to look up at the blonde. "Yeah?"
"Sounds good." He nods managing a ghost of a smile.
-
Logan's alarms came and went. He's awake but certainly in no rush to get out of bed, favouring lying his head on y/n's stomach while she plays with his hair.
"Would you stay with me if I lose my seat before the end of the season?" Logan asks breaking the peaceful but cold silence between them.
"Don't even talk like that." Y/n mutters trying to keep her voice void of the anger that it's verging on the edge of. "You are not going to lose your seat before the end of the season and even if you did-which is not going to happen. I would never leave you because of it...I would never leave you if you gave me the choice. Full stop."
Logan only responds by turning his head to hide his face against her skin.
"Logan..." Y/n tries, swallowing thickly at the knowledge he's hurting in such a way.
She tried not to think much of him deciding he doesn't need to be in any rush to get to the paddock. But he did reach over and put his phone onto do not disturb after the alarm and it seemed to starting going crazy. People had definitely tried to call, he was meant to be in.
"We can't stay here forever." Y/n whispers rubbing her hand through his hair but he doesn't reply.
So instead of pushing, she just remains quiet and gives him the time she knows he's silently asking for.
After another 15 minutes of just playing with his hair. She keeps herself quiet when he finally shifts up and looks at her, but he quickly kisses her softly and smiles at her but it's forced.
"Are you practicing smiling with me?"
"Apparently not if you have to ask." Logan sighs then sitting up. "I just want to stay here with you."
"I know. I don't think anyone would blame you for not showing up today. Or even just saying you want to fly over to Japan."
"You think?" He asks looking slightly amused but not quite enough for it to reach his eyes.
"Well I'd understand and I'm the only one who matters here." Y/n smiles earning a small laugh. "I love your smile...don't let them ruin your smile today."
"For you, I'll keep smiling." Logan promises making her smile and move to kiss him.
And just like that they're up getting on with the day.
When they get to the paddock the level of support for Logan is overwhelming, though y/n actually had already found the support for her boyfriend online was insane. A little harsh on Alex, though maybe initially she'd felt like finding a car to run over the rebuilt F1 car and destroy the second chassis to make a point.
Logan doesn't really see Alex but y/n couldn't promise not to be slightly cold towards him.
It wasn't Alex's decision. James made the decision.
But it's Alex's crash, so she holds him somewhat at fault for this. Even if it's more on the team's completely unacceptable state of not having spare parts like the spare chassis they need.
"You're not smiling." Logan comments making y/n lift her eyebrows quickly from how deep they'd furrowed.
"Just thinking." Y/n mumbles before managing a smile at him as he relinks their hands. "I like seeing them show you all the love you. I think you needed to see that people are here for you."
-
Y/n doesn't know if she's spent so much of her life straining herself from punching people in the face. She'd happily use most of the Sky Sports commentators as target practice.
Her mum would scold her for such violent thoughts. Hell if Logan could read her mind then he might even try to settle her fiery urges.
She's flexed her hands more times to try and unfurl them from the tight fists she'd held them in for the better part of an hour.
She's not even been watching the screens. Only focusing on Logan while he stands with engineers.
Only once they're out of the garage when practice is when she discover fans saw her on broadcast and have duped her as Logan's "scary dog privileges" and apparently fear for Alex or James to cross her.
"Fantastic." Y/n mumbles walking around the paddock only to find herself caught in Oscar's company and he looks pretty amused.
"You look like you might be ready to knock someone down with a headbutt." Oscar comments making her hum. "How's he doing? I haven't got to talk to him?"
"Better now he knows the amount support he's getting." Y/n sighs while crossing her arms. "But he doesn't really want to be here. He'll probably leave early."
"I don't blame him. I get it, but-"
"No. It wasn't his crash to pay the price for." Y/n cuts in not standing for a second of it. "I'm sick of seeing people try to justify it. If one more person tries to say that it's understandable but not fair, I'm going to knock them down and stand on their windpipe till they're blue."
"Every time we talk I'm happier and happier that I'm on your good side." Oscar comments earning a small smile that in different circumstances would've been a laugh. "I'm glad Logan has you...It took him a long time to find you, but you perfectly balance him out. I think he needed someone who so...loyally defends him."
"People talk shit about him constantly. Then this happens...How is he supposed to stand by a team when they publicly humiliate him like this?"
Oscar only looks at her in sympathy.
"Anyway, I don't want to bring down your mood for your home race...you're looking really good out there." Y/n smiles lightly trying not to be a completely moody bitch.
"Thanks. If there's one race I want to go well, it's the home race."
"Well I have faith in your capabilities to make that happen." Y/n smiles before she swallows. "I'll be rooting for you to take pole in qualifying."
"That might be pushing it." Oscar chuckles but she shrugs and just leans over kissing his cheek with a one armed hug.
"I'll still be rooting for you, I'm going to go be a moody bitch elsewhere."
"I know Logan appreciates it."
Y/n sighs moving through the paddock frowning at cameras focusing on her and burning some holes through any sight of Sky commentators. No doubt that will be clipped and posted soon enough.
By the time she sees Logan briefly before qualifying, she finds he's with Alex.
"Hey, y/n." Alex greets seeming to try to be his usual friendly self but he's met with a cold shoulder.
"Alex."
"What y/n means is...happy birthday." Logan smiles linking their hands and squeezing hers in a push to be nicer but she only shoots a fake smile to the older man.
Alex makes a quick excuse of needing to get ready before he leaves while Logan sighs turning to her with a look that is supposed to make her feel guilty.
"I don't feel bad." Y/n states making Logan sigh.
"I know you're being protective. But you can't make Alex the enemy." Logan smiles sadly while tucking some strands behind her ear. "You know I love you...and I love that you're upset for me. But you can be nice to Alex...especially on his birthday."
"I'll consider it." Y/n murmurs earning a smile from the American since he knows she's still just being hesitant because she's upset.
"He was saying he will had to tread carefully after seeing the clips of you in practice." Logan smiles earning a small smile before he gently cups her face. "It's just one weekend."
"I know."
She hopes he's right. Though she's seen James talk about them "hoping" to have a chassis ready for Japan.
But that's a problem for another day.
"How are you feeling?" Y/n asks making Logan look at her for a moment.
It reads on his face. He can paint a smile on but damage goes deeper than skin deep.
"It still hurts. But it's my hurt to feel."
"You know asking me not to hurt for you is like asking me to just stop caring."
This decision is damaging to the team. It's damaging to Logan's confidence. If Alex fails to get even 1 point, it's damaging to his reputation. But for y/n, she knows that regardless of what's said, and regardless of how James might try. This is going to stick with Logan possibly long after he's out of the team.
Y/n hates that someone has the power to hurt him like that and did hurt him like that. James used that power and swung it like an axe into Logan's side, whether he wanted to or not that's exactly the damage that's been done. But the only thing y/n hates more than that, is she hates that she can't fix it.
"I'll try to be better." Y/n sighs making him smile lightly and pat her.
"That's all I ask."
Y/n grunts a little still not being able to stop herself from voicing her disapproval.
"I love you." Logan smiles lightly then gently kissing her.
"I love you too."
"Alright, let's get moving. And please try not to look like you might bite James' ear off if he gets too close."
"No promises that I won't bite his ear off if he gets too close. At least if I look like I'm going to do it, he'll not risk coming too close to me."
Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos @llando4norris @partyinpitlane @lpab @xoscar03 @harrysdimple05 @mellowarcadefun @cixrosie @scopeiguess
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kingtomura · 21 days
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Cat and mouse
synopsis: Your ex boyfriend has some nerve texting you at three in the morning — an entire week after the disaster breakup you had. You should really go over there and give him a piece of your mind. Well, you know what they say about famous last words.  wc: 6.1k | crossposted to ao3 content: tomura shigaraki x female reader, no quirks au, toxic tomura, reader is kinda toxic too tbh, unhealthy relationships, breaking up and making up, vaginal fingering, overstim, breeding kink, piv, dubcon creampie, degredation, threats of baby trapping, hurt/comfort, sweet at the end idc
You’ve told your friends time and time again to stay out of your business. They never listen. 
“Oh my god, Kirishima? Is he even twenty yet?” You drag as you watch your friend flip through several pictures of the redheaded boy like he was a member of the bachelor. 
She smiles, scrolling her phone for more options, “no, but he will be in a couple of months!”
“No!” Your words are sharp. You love Mina but god, you don’t want her to play matchmaker with you. It’s not like you’re a charity case or something. 
She gasps and you swear you could see the lightbulb go off above her head. “What about Denki? He’s fun!” 
You groan, falling back onto the bed and covering your eyes with your arm. “Mina.” 
“Hey, just give her a break okay? It’s only been about a week.” Your saving grace Yaoyorozu speaks up and it’s nice to finally have someone on your side. 
“Thank you.”
“Seriously? So we’re just going to sit around and watch you mope about all day?” Mina questions, irritation clear in her voice and it grates your ears.  
“Preferably, yes! Just let me be.” You roll over, face officially shoved into your pillow. It’s been a rough couple of days and you haven’t gotten a single call or text from Tomura. Not that you should be expecting one. You broke up with him after all. 
It’s just.. this time feels different. Usually there’s more arguing and he’s fighting for you to stay around, but this time there was nothing. No quips, no insults, just “fine, get out then.”
That hurt the most. 
You had no idea what he was up to. 
Maybe he was as depressed as you were. 
Maybe he’s found someone else. 
The thought makes you stop in your tracks. The idea of Tomura, your tomura with someone else is enough to make you nauseous. 
You jump to your feet and rush to the bathroom, locking yourself in and falling to your knees. 
God, what if that was why it was so easy?
You pull out your phone, the device lighting up and unlocking with your facial id. 
Tomura doesn’t use social media much but you could still check to see if he’d blocked you. 
To your surprise, he hadn’t. 
He hasn't posted anything either and there’s no new person in his followers. 
You feel yourself exhale a breath you didn’t realize you had been holding. No change is a good thing. 
There’s knocking on the door and you thank the stars you locked it. Your friends would judge you so hard if they saw you lurking through your ex’s social media. 
“Hey, are you okay in there?” It’s your saving grace Yaoyorozu again and you almost feel bad for shutting her out. 
“Yeah, I’m sorry if it feels like I pressured you! I’ll give you some space.” Mina's regretful voice calls and it makes your heart clench. You know she means well but she just doesn’t understand. None of them do. 
Whether you want to admit it or not, you love Tomura. 
Yes, you argue and yes, you fight, but he just gets you. He’s so cynical, but so caring — in his own special way. Too bad he was such an asshole. The argument wasn’t even supposed to go that far. 
There are tears beginning to blur your vision and you wipe them away, willing the feelings down and standing to your feet. 
If he wanted you to stay away, then fine. You could do that. 
You splash cool water onto your face and take a breath, steeling yourself and getting ready to face your friend once more. It was Saturday and they were convinced you needed a fun girl’s night.
It takes a lot to refrain from cringing at the phrase, but you believe they held some truth with the idea. You definitely didn’t want to be alone right now.
You unlock the bathroom door, meeting Mina and Yaoyorozu’s worried expressions with a smile. 
“We should probably get ready now, huh?”
Mina’s eyes light up, smile blinding and excitement contagious.
“Yes! Jirou and the others are here now.” She starts to clap, excitement buzzing around her, “Girl’s night is going to be amazing!” 
—-
Girl’s night was a bust.
The moment everyone arrived the apartment quickly filled with chaos. Noisy and busy, it was all giving you a headache. Until someone decided it would be a good idea to pregame before going out.
In preparation for the night your friend’s insisted that you get dolled up, hair makeup and skimpy clothes you wouldn’t look twice at on any normal day. 
You had to admit it made you a little more excited to get out and at least feel like your world isn't crashing around you. It was supposed to be a fun little night out. Somehow one drink turned into two, which turned into three which turned into Mina swearing she could beat everyone in a dance battle. 
The group only got more riled up as everyone indulged in this silly challenge. 
One challenge leads to another, which leads to more drinking, which then ends in everyone being too drunk to function and knocking out — all laid out in odd places around your living room floor and couch. 
The groggy feeling came first, your arms radiating in dull pain as you vaguely recalled trying to beat Mina in a contest of who could do the most push ups. It sure as hell wasn't you, but the drunk version of you thought it was possible to move mountains. 
You blink a few times, trying to will your eyes to rapidly adjust to the darkness of the room and find out what this odd buzzing noise beside you had been. Turning over, you find your phone, squinting as the too bright screen lights up your face and you see that it is three a.m.
You had fallen asleep with everyone else.
The phone buzzes again, lighting up and you have to squint further to read the contact name.
Tomura. 
Your eyes widen as you scan over the three texts he’s sent you. 
Wasting no time, you rush to your feet and into the bathroom so you can look at your phone without the chance of prying eyes overlooking your shoulder. Even though they were probably going to be out until late morning.
Tomura’s messages were short, no paragraphs, no essays but three different messages sent in succession. 
When are you coming to get your shit?
I’m tired of waiting.
And I’m deleting our farm btw. 
The first two messages don’t get much of a reaction from you, especially since it’s three a.m and he knows you’re usually asleep around this time. 
But the third message…
Your Stardew Valley farm that you’ve had and worked on together for almost two years being put on the line and threatened? What the fuck was his problem?
This farm was a constant in your relationship. Throughout the ups and downs and back and forths. You were sure that hell would freeze over before you both would give up that progress. But here he is, threatening you while you would have been asleep. What an asshole.
Your feet are moving before your brain can stop them and you make your way to the front door. Since your friends were all passed out it would be easy to sneak over to Shigaraki’s place, give him a piece of your mind and then sneak back. In and out, quick and easy. 
Your decision is made and you grab your coat, deciding to just go over there as you are. You hadn’t changed out of your outfit that was supposed to be for the night out, but it didn’t matter. You only needed to get over there and get there fast.
Once you arrive at Tomura’s doorstep you waste no time knocking. It’s around three in the morning so he should still very much be awake. 
There's a chill in the air as you wait for his answer and you wrap your jacket closer to your body. A rumble of thunder caught your attention and it's then you notice the rain clouds rolling in. You knew it would only be a matter of time before the bottom of the sky falls out and rain drenches everything. You were on borrowed time if you wanted to make it back before then.
After what feels like forever the door finally opens, revealing a very cozy pajama-clad Tomura, who seemed a little too pleased for his own good — if that sly smile he was doing a bad job at hiding was anything to go by. 
You don't give him a chance to greet you or say anything for that matter, stopping his words in their tracks as you cut him off. “What do you want?”
He doesn’t bother hiding his smirk now, the expression making your fists clench and your anger boil. “What do I want? You’re at my door, in front of my apartment.” He scoffs, clearly getting the exact reaction he had wanted from you, “I should be asking what do you want?” 
Caught like a deer in headlights. Whatever, you don't let that stop you as you pull out your phone to show him his text. “You sent this, I know you’re bluffing. What do you want?”
Tomura shrugs, leaning against his door frame and giving you a pleased look. Expression relaxed and content. Not a care in the world. “To talk.”
“Well, I'm here now, so let’s talk.” You spit, crossing your arms and waiting for whatever else he would throw at you. 
“Sure, but you should come in first.” He starts, looking up towards the darkened sky, confirming his assessment. “It’s gonna rain soon, you know.”
Of course you knew that. 
You just didn’t want to give him more time than you had. But you agree and go in, ignoring the fighting feeling in the back of your mind screaming at you to turn away and hightail it out of there. 
Tomura’s home is the exact way it was the day you left, give or take a few more containers of takeout littered around the place. You have half a mind to scold him about it, but quickly remember that it isn’t your place to do that anymore. 
So instead you stay quiet, following him into the apartment and into the living room. Opting to stand as he sat, and resisted the urge to get comfortable. 
“So, what do you want to talk about?” You try, done watching him pick up a controller and boot up a video game. Seriously? 
Your patience was wearing thin now as you watched him ignore you to play some stupid game. You try calling to him again, knowing this was probably a waste of your time and groans.
“I was in the middle of something before you got here. Let me finish and we’ll talk.” It's flippant the way he waves you off and continues the game. The lack of care only hurting your feelings further and making you realize this may have all been a big mistake on your part.
You shouldn’t be at your ex boyfriend’s house being ignored. You should be at your house getting drunk and hanging out with your best friends. There was no reason to stay somewhere you’re obviously not valued.
It’s a simple choice when you put it into perspective. 
But things are always easier said than done. 
You sigh, the air puffing out your cheeks, a bad habit you had when angry, and walk right in front of Tomura’s TV. There was more satisfaction in making him lose the game and then announcing your departure than just leaving quietly. 
He cranes his neck to see around you, but it doesn’t work, finally giving up as his character inevitably dies. “What!?”
“I’m leaving!” You announced, turning on your heel and heading towards the front door.
“You had to make me lose first? I said I was almost done!” He spat back, rising from the couch to follow you.
You shrug, “I don’t care. Why invite me in if you’re just going to ignore me?”
“Didn’t think you had the patience of a child.'' Tomura stands in front of you, cutting through your path and stopping you in your tracks.
It's almost comical the way he insults you. “Okay pot, meet kettle.” You try to brush past him, but he side steps with you. 
“What are you dressed like that for anyway? Did you go out tonight or something?”
“No!” You deny, a little louder than intended and then pause. “But it’s none of your business what I do anyway.”
Tomura hums at this, taking the words in and running them through his mind as he gives you a once over, eyes scanning from the too-tight shirt you wore — showing a generous amount of cleavage, down to your mini skirt that left little to the imagination. 
“Could've fooled me.”
“What do you mean by that?” You hate when he gives you cryptic answers, like it’s impossible to pry into his mind to see what he was thinking at the moment. 
“You knew you were coming to see me so I dont get why you're wearing that skimpy shit. Unless you wanted me to check you out.”
“Not everything is about you, Tomura. Maybe I just wanted to dress up and look nice.”
“Bullshit—”
“God, Tomura you always fucking do this!” You yell, walking right up into his face. The excitement in his scarlet eyes sends a chill up your spin, but you can’t back down. 
He gets closer, matching your tone and you can still see the grin he’s trying to hide. It makes you see red. “Do what? Tell you the truth? You know I’m not wrong.”
“Yeah, you think you know everything, but you don’t. I’m dressed up because I want to be, not because of you.” You’re insisting at this point, frustration threatening to tip over and spill out into the form of another pointless argument. Why did you think you could actually come over and have a decent conversation with him?
Tomura is a master at getting under your skin and hitting where it hurts. In all of your arguments he’s never really pulled out the big shots but you wouldn’t put it past him to do so now. 
“Oh, so you come over to my place dressed like a slut and you expect me to believe you don’t have some hidden motive?”
And there it is.
Your last straw. He could be so egotistical and mean — you’ve had it. 
You regret it the moment you do it, but your body moves before your brain can process your actions. You push Tomura. Hard. 
He doesn’t fall back far but you know it’s enough to piss him off. And he’s never been one to hold anything back, so he shoves you back and your back hits the wall. 
Tomura has you pinned before you know it and there’s a thrill that runs through your body in a way you know you shouldn’t be feeling. Your knees feel weak for reasons that are not related to fear and your panties were gradually becoming more wet. 
His voice is low and his eyes are narrowed as he pins you against the wall, pressing your cheeks together with his other hand. “You’re really starting to piss me off.”
You have to bite back a smile, knowing this has taken a turn and you aren’t strong enough to stop where it’s going. Not that you would want to. 
“Oh yeah? If I piss you off so badly then why are you hard?”
He doesn’t look down. He can feel his own arousal just as well as you can while it’s pressed against your abdomen. 
Tomura pushes off of you — maintaining some distance as he turns away. 
“You’re fucking annoying.”
“Sure am.” You supply, chipper and certain as you trail behind him. 
He’s walking further into the apartment, and you follow. Legs moving on their own accord as you go further into the lion's den, exchanging quips and insults. You jab your finger into his shoulder, bothered by the way he continues to ignore you, it's a pathetic attempt at catching his attention and it works. Kind of. 
The only response being him slapping your hand away with a glare and muttering a soft fuck off as he walked on. 
You both went back and forth. Like the sun and moon, you just can’t stay away from each other.  
It was how these things usually went between you and Tomura. He would start up, make a petty argument and you would never back down. Tomura is someone who was used to getting his way and others simply did what he said with no objections. 
But that was not how you were.
And he loved it.
You knew by the way he would get that devious glimmer in his eye when you would challenge a point, starting up a debate. Sometimes they were heated enough to make you both break up. It never lasted more than a few days. A week being the longest.
Push and pull. 
Tomura made his way past you again, ignoring your calls about how you hate being ignored. At this point you’re sure he’s doing it on purpose to rile you up more but you can’t help but take the bait. You grab his shoulder, forcing him to turn around and face you as you point a finger in his face. 
“Stop walking away from me!” 
He grabs your wrist and pulls you closer, making you stumble on your feet and almost lose balance. You were so close you could feel the heat from his body and smell the fresh linen scent of his shirt. “Don’t tell me what to do.” 
You snatch your wrist away from him, tension between you two growing hotter by the second as the space between you got thinner. 
“What are you going to do about it?” 
The narrowing of his eyes only made your grin grow wider as you watched the gears turn in his head as he thought about just how many things he would do about it. All of it enticed you, so you beat him to the punch. 
You reach forward again, fully intending to shove his shoulder again for another reaction, another glare, maybe even more words, but he stops you. It was fast, the way you both tumbled through the hallway as Tomura crashed his lips to yours. The relief of finally feeling his lips again meshed with the excitement of how rough he was with you. 
You lose yourself in the kiss, welcoming him in with open arms as you vaguely register the dark walls of his room and posters plastered along the walls in your scuffle.
It was exciting, probably the best part of breaking up and making up. At this point you think the whole point of falling apart is coming back together again. An endless cycle where the reward is worth the punishment. 
Cat and mouse. 
You end up on top of him, straddling his hips while your smug smile beams down at him. Tomura gives you an unamused look in return, yet the way his hands rested on your thighs gave away the ill hidden interest. It was all the encouragement you needed as you leaned down, hovering above him with both hands on his chest. 
“Not so tough now, are you?”
It’s bait. You know it’s bait, he knows it’s bait, but he takes it anyway — the way you knew he would. 
Tomura wastes no time flipping the both of you over, quickly reversing your positions as he settled himself between your legs. It’s dangerous the way his actions riled you up further, and you have to bite your lip to keep the smile from betraying your false anger. You couldn’t let him know how excited you were to be back in his bed. 
He presses your cheeks together and rocks your head left to right, tone mocking and eyes wild with fever, “Oh, look who’s become a firecracker all of the sudden. Where did that flame come from, huh?”
You want to respond, but Tomura beats you to it, releasing your cheeks and pointing a nimble finger against your forehead, “Don’t be dumb.”
His eyes trail from yours and then down to your lips, then finally down to your exposed cleavage. The movement was swift as he cupped one of your breasts in his hand and dipped down, claiming your lips again. It was softer than the first time but not by much, especially not when he matched his pace by grinding his clothed erection into you, making you moan at the contact. 
Your skirt was so short and it made you feel even more exposed than you already were. Tomura had easy access to you and the thin fabric of your panties made everything feel so much closer. 
You moan at the contact, swiping your tongue against Tomura’s bottom lip and wasting no time deepening the kiss as you pull him closer. You needed more and you needed it as soon as possible. 
Tomura pulled the low cut front of your shirt down, easily exposing your breasts from the confines of the shirt and massaged them, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles against your nipples and making you cry out from the sensitivity. 
He pulls away from you, eyes gazing into yours and you swore in that moment he put you in a trance. Tomura’s ruby red gaze always left you mesmerized and you can’t help the whimper that leaves your lips, brows furrowed and eyes wanting, “Please.”
“Please what?” And he’s not taunting you, he’s not mocking you. His eyes are soft as he brings a hand to your cheek. “Tell me what you want.”
“You.” Fuck, you’ve missed him. “I just want you.”
There’s a hint of a smile on his face as he strokes your cheek, soft look in his eyes making your heart flutter, and then it’s gone. Replaced by a hardened gaze as he moves to remove your shirt and bra, fully exposing you to his hungry eyes, and then moves to remove your short skirt. 
His hands hover there for a moment, debating whether or not he should keep it on and fuck you in it, but then decides against the idea and pulls it off, taking your soaked panties down with it as well. 
The air in the room feels cool against your skin as you shiver in anticipation. 
“Fuck,” Tomura whispers, now eye level with your cunt. You gasp as he runs two fingers between your wet folds and holds the digits up to show you. Syrupy clear slick clung to them, slowly trailing down as Tomura rose back up, eye level with you once more. 
“You’re so wet…” He murmured, bringing the digits to your mouth and you opened, taking them into your mouth and tasting yourself. You kept eye contact as you watched his eyes widen in delight — Tomura loved it when you put on a show for him.
There’s another moment of Tomura pressing against your tongue with his fingers and then he pulls them out, opting for a kiss in exchange, his tongue dipping into your mouth and groaning  as he could taste what’s left of your slick on you as well.
The pleasant feeling and linguid action of your movements made your shoulders relax as you practically melted into his soft bed, the feeling of his body above yours bringing you mountains of comfort. It was a distraction, of course. 
You felt the same two of Tomura’s fingers prod at your slick entrance before pressing in fully and all the way down to the knuckle. The stretch was intense but the pressure was euphoric, making you squeeze your eyes shut and grip him closer. 
He didn’t make you wait long as he pumped his fingers, quickly finding that sensitive spot so deep inside of you that only he could pinpoint and brushing against it over and over. 
The feeling was so good it made you pull away from the kiss to breathe, thighs twitching and toes curling in pleasure. You wouldn’t last long like this.
“Tomura, fuck..!” You moaned, drowning in ecstasy as he continued his abuse of your spot, never letting up or slowing down, aiming to make you cum as quickly as he could. It was obvious he wanted you to come undone as soon as possible by the way he watched your every expression. 
The way your brows furrowed to the way you bit your lip. Tomura eagerly drank every expression and gave it back to you in the form of pleasure. 
“What?” He started, unphased by your dilemma, “Gonna cum?”
It took a lot of focus and effort, but you nod — done with fighting for the night and accepting the fact that you will come apart quickly. So you give in to the pleasure. 
Tomura smiles, a devious grin splitting his features as he curls his fingers, hitting the spot one more time for good measure and you lose composure, your climax crashing into you like a tidal wave. There was nothing you could do besides ride the feeling while holding on to Tomura tight — like you would get swept away if you didn’t. 
He fucks you through it with his fingers, eyes never leaving your face as you come down from your high. 
“Pent up, huh?” He questions, and this time there is that little hint of teasing. It brings you back to reality. 
Yes, you have been pent up. You haven’t been able to get off to anything since you’ve broken up and it’s been hell. 
You have no time for the games, you just want him and you want him now. 
So, you take Tomura’s face in your hands, making him look you in the eyes. The flecks of black in his carmine eyes always makes you remember why you come back. Every single time. 
“Fuck me, please, Tomura.” It's soft and filled with desire that you cannot be bothered to hide, and Tomura has never been one to deny you.
He quickly discards his own clothes, making sure to not stay away from you for long. His cock is hard and leaking precum from the head as he strokes it in preparation. You feel giddy at the thought and watch as he slides the head of his cock between your folds, coating it with your slick, and rubbing against your clit. The action makes your hips twitch up towards him. 
He loves to tease and make you wait, but today he doesn’t make you wait long. Tomura leans down after lining himself up with your entrance and places his free hand behind your head, right above the nape of your neck. His hands were warm and the feeling of those hands cradling your head felt so comforting in the space of his familiar dark bedroom. 
You bring a hand to his hair, tangling your fingers in his ashen locks as he pushes forward. The stretch makes you whimper and Tomura captures your lips in a kiss again, swallowing the noises and releasing a groan of his own as your walls tighten around his cock. 
There's something about the way Tomura drags his hips, the way he starts off at a slow pace, winding you up as he steadily increases his speed and force. It happens so gradually that you don't realize you’re screaming his name until he tells you to shut up — threatening to cover your mouth because he didn't want his neighbors to hear how much of a slut you were.
It drove you mad the way he said it all with a smile and fucked you harder. Almost daring you to be louder so he can punish you with a hand over your mouth.
Tomura knew how rough you liked it and he always delivered, giving you back arching pleasure as he pounded into you. It leaves you gasping and struggling to keep your voice down. Your hands find the surface of his back, trying to hold on as much as you could with building pleasure on the horizon. 
“Tomu— Tomura..! Please,” you cry and he doesn’t miss a beat, driving his cock so deep against your sweet spot it makes you see stars. “Fuck..!” 
“Yeah, that’s it.” Tomura cooed, eyes filled with mischief as he brought you closer to the edge. “Cry for me.”
And you do, your body feeling euphoric as the feeling buzzed up your spine and filled your brain with the fuzz of ecstasy. 
“What are you gonna do, huh?” He starts, his hips grinding against you, the closeness of his pelvis rubs against your clit, making you cry out again, “What are you gonna do when I breed this pretty cunt and make sure you’re stuck with me forever?”
He’s bluffing, you know Tomura doesn’t want kids. He’s just trying to gauge your reaction. Your dedication. 
“Tomura…” You only moan, breath catching as he hits that spot inside you that he knows so well. 
Tomura is smiling, wild and devious, as you look up at him with glossy eyes, so close to crying from the feelings, “I’m gonna do it. I’ll make you mine forever and you can’t do anything about it.” 
“Ah!” You should stop him, tell him to calm down but he has your eyes rolling to the back of your head and your back arching off of the bed. Everything is blurring together and you can only slur words as the drool from your earlier kiss trails down your cheek. 
You are completely at his mercy like this and you know your friends would be beyond disappointed.  
It just feels so good the way his cock drags in and out of your body pulling moans and whines from your throat. He was relentless in the way he pounded into you — beyond the point of being soft and slow because he knows that’s exactly you like it. 
“Say you want it.” The command comes with the slowing of his hips and you whine, high and needy as Tomura slows to a near stop.
“Tomura, I—“
“Say you want it or I swear to god I’ll stop right now.” It’s a threat and you don’t want to find out if he’ll go through with it. Tomura never goes back on his word. 
“No, please, don’t— I want it!” you pant, frustrated and aching for more movement.
“I want you to,” you stammer, desperate to have your release. “I don’t care if you cum in me. I need you so bad.”
“That’s my girl,” He coos, dipping his head down onto your shoulder, “Fuck.. love you s’much”
You stop — you’ve never heard him say that. Ever. You doubted he would ever say it since it’s been so long. 
He doesn’t give you a chance to ruminate on it because he's picking up the pace again and giving you the friction you were so deeply in need of. The feelings are swimming in your head as your cries reach new heights. Tomura is too far gone to stop you or care and you’re thankful. You couldn’t stop yourself if you tried. 
The build of your orgasm crashes down and sends you with it, making your thighs quiver in pleasure and your eyes squeeze shut. Tomura’s mouth meets yours before you could cry out, the warmth of his tongue guiding you as he fucked you through it. 
He didn’t last long after, the way your walls tightened around him with the force of your orgasm has Tomura’s pace erratic as he chased his own high. 
The bed shook as Tomura finally finished, hips stuttered as he released inside of you, hot seed coating your insides and making heat rise to your cheeks. He really did it.
You watch as he slows to a stop above you, his eyes closed as he enjoys the feeling of release. Tomura’s breathing was heavy and you couldn’t stop yourself from bringing him down into another kiss, traveling from his lips to his cheeks and then back again. 
It was intimate and you were worried it may have been too much, given the reason you were both in this situation was because of a stupid breakup. 
Tomura’s pulls out of you, making you wince and taking the feeling of being so full away from you. He doesn’t go far, opting to stay on top of you and rest his head on your shoulder, wanting to keep you as close as possible. 
“You really piss me off.” He mumbles into your shoulder, out of breath and tired. “God, why can’t you just stay with me.”
“Tomura…” Your hands run through his hair, the sweat is making it stick to his forehead as you wait for him to keep talking. 
“Stop leaving me.” His voice is firm, unwavering.
“You told me to go.” 
“I didn’t think you fucking would. I would never actually want you to.”
“I can’t read between the lines Tomura, I’m not in your head.” You make him look at you this time, pulling his hair a little to get him to raise his head. “Did you mean it?”
“I just said I didn’t—“
“No, the other thing you said.” He gives you a look of pure confusion and you lose a little bit of hope, “when you said you loved me?” 
You stare into his carmine eyes, hoping, praying it wasn’t just pillow talk from the heat of the moment. 
He looks at you for a long time, frustration still wearing on his features. If you didn’t know any better you would say he was pouting. “Of course I meant it. I’ve always felt like that.”
“But you’ve never said it!”
“I show it!”
“How?” This is getting frustrating and going in circles. 
He groans, sitting up and taking his warmth with him. “I’m not going to sit here and list everything I’ve ever done for you. I don’t think it works like that.”
You open your mouth to counter, irritation on your tongue because that’s not what you meant, but Tomura stops you again. 
“I don’t know how to explain it, okay?” He shakes his head and sighs, laying next to you on the bed and looking up at his ceiling. “It’s weird. I have these strong feelings, but it’s not hate, it's not anger. It's the opposite of that.”
You stare at him as he focuses ahead, keeping his eyes trained on the uninteresting ceiling above.
“Father said it’s a weakness and I should feel that way but,” There’s a pause as he looks away from the ceiling, meeting your eyes finally, “if it’s so weak of me, then why are the feelings so strong?” 
Your heart aches. It's clear that he’s torn, and with the strange way he was raised you know that he can’t help the way he is. 
“Tomura…” 
“And it won’t go away. I can’t fight them down or push them away like I can with everything else. It eats me up and I… guess I lash out because of it.” He shakes his head and for the first time Tomura looks defeated. You’ve never seen him this way — he’s always been filled with confidence and self assured. “I just don’t know what to do.”
You bring a hand to his cheek as you press your forehead against his. It kills you that this is what’s been on his mind and you aren’t sure what you could do to fix it. Maybe there was nothing you could do, physically, but you would do your best to be there for him emotionally.
“Sometimes,” you try to be careful with your words, knowing how much Tomura looks up to his foster father even though the man has been nothing but strange to him. “People say things that aren’t true because they don’t know how to live with it.”
Tomura’s guardian cannot live with love nor the idea of it. 
“That doesn't mean you have to live that way.” 
And it’s the truth. 
Tomura doesn’t say anything, just watches you with heavy lidded eyes, ruby red nearly glowing in the low light of the room. He was so much more than what people thought they knew of him and you didn’t care if it took time for others to see that.
He leans in, closing his eyes and you meet him halfway into a kiss. 
It's warm and it's soft and you know that even when your phone is buzzing from dozens of missed calls and texts from your friends, it will be fine. 
You and Tomura would take things one day at a time.
538 notes · View notes
mistydeyes · 8 months
Note
141 members (price,gaz,soap and Simon ) reaction where reader and the group are in the common area together chilling And one of the members is teasing them and instead of entertaining him she scoffs rolling her eyes saying “bitch” while flashing her hand in a shoo motion and being sassy?
You don’t have to write this if you don’t want to ..I’m asking for a lot tbh 😭
thank you for requesting! i could 100% see gaz and soap being the absolute worst especially when you want to relax. they're like your annoying little brothers who just keep bothering you when you want to be left alone.
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summary: After a 36hr mission, you just wanted to enjoy some tea and scroll on social media. However, Gaz and Soap disrupt your evening and decide to pester you with their abundance of questions.
pairings: platonic!Taskforce 141 x fem!reader (codename: Sweetheart)
warnings: swearing, soap and gaz being ur annoying teammates
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After a much-needed shower, you made your way to the common room. You rolled your tense muscles as you filled the kettle with water and waited patiently. As you watched the water boil, Ghost joined and gave you a casual head nod. Part of you was glad he wasn't one for conversation, especially following the arduous mission you had just completed. You returned the gesture and back to your now boiling water. "There's enough for you, Lt," you commented before searching the drawers for your favorite tea. However, as you reached into the empty tin, you groaned. "Fuck," you mumbled before Ghost turned to you. You held up the tin disappointedly, "Someone finished the last bag." "Probably Soap," he responded and you threw it the tin in the recycling. You sighed before grabbing some decaf chamomile, a close second to your favorite lavender earl grey blend but far from the same.
As you sipped on the lackluster tea, you sat down on the worn couch. You hoisted your legs up, pulling out your phone to scroll through some mindless posts and videos. It was a necesssary reprieve and you were enjoying your enrichment time. However, it was interrupted by Gaz and Soap loudly entering the room. "Fuck me, mate," you could hear Gaz exclaim, "why'd you talk me into the gym and then a run." To your disgust, the room filled with the smell of sweat and musk, most likely from Soap. They continued to talk and you recognized the familiar sound of water bottles being filled before they made your way to you. "Evening Sweetheart," Soap commented and gently moved your legs off the couch to sit.
"Not in the mood, Soap," you mumbled as you adjusted yourself and he laughed. "141's sweetheart has an attitude," he chided and you rolled your eyes. "Why do they call you 'Sweetheart' anyways?" Gaz asked, joining on an adjacent chair. "Some fucking guys in my squad thought it was hilarious," you replied, with an emphasis on your last word. You hated the callsign, something that followed you throughout basic and into selection. Your all-male squad thought it was a great idea to call you the group's sweetheart and the name stuck. The misogynistic atmosphere was one of the downsides to the job but you tried to ignore it the best you could. "I bet they thought she was a barrack bunny," Soap joked and you put down your phone to shoot daggers at him. Gaz even hit his leg lightly but the petulant sergeant continued.
"So tell me, Bonnie," he asked in a sarcastic tone, "were ya one?" You scoffed at his question and you swore you could feel your eyes roll. You took a moment to internalize your anger before replying. "Don't have to be such a bitch about it, Mactavish," you replied coldly before gesturing your hand in a 'go away' motion. Before he could bite back at your response, Ghost interrupted. "Get a shower, Soap, you smell like shit," he responded and everyone realized he had taken a position at one of the tables in the room. "Steamin Jesus, Lt." Soap responded in shock, "you really are a ghost." "He's right, you smell like a sewer," you added with a smirk and you could tell he was feeling more self-conscious. "I swear I'll find out," Soap responded before quickly walking off to the showers.
You returned back to your scrolling as the room fell silent again. You could feel Gaz looking at you and you took a moment to put your phone back down. "What Gaz?" you interrogated as you met his gaze. "What's the real story behind your callsign?" he asked, almost nervously. You laughed a bit before you responded to his question. "Just some assholes from the Army," you said plainly, "at least they were more creative than you. What kind of a name is Gaz anyways?"
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vikkirosko · 3 months
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Omg please do a reverse 'why me' Abt your last post like the character why tf you choose me after reader confesses
You can do the same character if you want I kinda only care About Alastor tbh
Well, if you want Alastor, then there will be Alastor
📻 Alastor x Reader headcanons Reverse Why me?🎙
Alastor guessed that you had feelings for him. He saw how you started to worry next to him, but he was in no hurry to talk to you about it. That's why you spoke first, telling him how you felt about him. Alastor listened attentively to your confession, after which he asked a single question. He asked you why he
Alastor knew exactly what he was like. Many were afraid of him, many tried to avoid him. He did a lot for his own amusement and you couldn't help but know it. But despite that, you still told him about your feelings. Although it pleased his pride, he knew that you could find someone who would not be like him
You listened to what Alastor said, but you were in no hurry to leave. He saw that you wanted to say something else, so he waited, looking at you carefully. You took a deep breath and said that you knew exactly what he was like, but that didn't stop you from falling in love with him. You weren't going to force him to accept your feelings, but at least you wanted him to know about them and not deny their existence
Alastor was really pleased that you had such feelings for him. In a way, it even flattered him. You left feeling too embarrassed, which amused Alastor even more, but he wasn't going to stop you
He was going to talk to you about your confession later, when you calmed down. If you were so determined, then maybe you two could have done something good and interesting
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slutforsnow · 3 months
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*evil laugh*
imagine president!coryo with a bratty!reader. Coryo hates when people talk back to him or tell him what to do.
Since he's president, nobody tells HIM what to do. expect reader🙈
"don't talk to me like that."
"aw, did i make you mad? didn't know the president was a little cry baby."
then he fucks readers brains out <3
Hold Your Tongue
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Cw/TW: Coryo is his own warning tbh 💀, spanking, slut shaming? (HE WOULD), inappropriate use of piss, mean!Coryo, president!Coryo
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As much as Coryo loves his dear wife, she could be a bratty bitch. Thinking she could run her mouth off to her little friends about how much their sex life had gone down since he became president and now had to attend all these fancy balls, galas, parties, and whatnot. Sure, it was nice to see his wife all dressed up like a doll and looking sexy, but running her mouth off? That was over the line.
That's how the couple landed in this situation. She had begun to run her pretty little mouth again, and one of her friends had said something along the lines of divorce.
The second the young president of Panem had ensured all the guests had left, he had bound his wife to their shared bed by her wrists, using the special handcuffs he had made for them; engraved with his last name to make sure she understood her punishment. She was also stripped of her dress and lingerie she had worn underneath it.
"I cannot believe you would allow your friends to say something so stupid," He began, slowly unbuttoning his red corset-vest. "Of all the things you had to let slide, it was a topic of divorce?"
"What's so bad about it? She was joking and drunk, I doubt she'll remember it, Coryo," She retorted, pouting a little and tugging wrists forward to try and free herself. Coryo had a tendency go purposely leave the cuffs loose enough for her so she could claw at his back, leaving red marks and little crescent moons from her nails. This time, however, the cuffs were tight enough to where she could barely wiggle her wrists. "Now, loosen the cuffs, I wanna get my makeup off!"
He didn't take lightly to her demanding tone. "Don't talk to me like that," He spat, dropping his vest on the floor, which was soon followed by his dress shirt.
"Awh, did I make you mad? I didn't know the president was a-" She was cut off by a sharp THAWCK against her skin.
Tears pricked her eyes, and she tried to blink them away. She knew Coryo was pissed, but to spank her with his belt on her thigh?
"I told you not to speak to me like that. Now look at you; crying like a little whore because I punished you like one. Don't you dare cry because there's going to be a lot more where that came from," He threatened, glaring down at her. Before she could think, Coryo raised his arm again and another thwack echoed in their bedroom.
"Now, I think we need to revisit a certain setting," He added, tossing his belt to the side and kicking his dress pants to the side, along with his black boxers.
"Wha- huh-" She questioned, semi-dazed from getting spanked only twice. Whatever strength ran through his veins really knocked the wind out of her and replaced it with dopamine.
"Don't play dumb," He chided, slamming his leaking member into her tight cunt causing her to let out a loud cry of pleasure. He continued his harsh pace while pinching and twisting her hard nipples as he marked her neck and collarbone with hickies.
All she could do while he overstimulated her body was moan, mewl, and scream his name. He was fucking the brattiness out of her, reducing her into a brainless whore, but did he care? No, he didn't care. She was going to learn one way or another.
Feeling her walls squeeze and grip on his cock, he smirked, pounding faster into her, pressing a hand to her lower abdomen. Something felt off about it this time; he could feel the bulge, which was normal, but it happened.
As Coryo was fucking his wife's brains out, she pissed while she came and he stopped his ruthless fucking. As y/n was coming down from her sex high, babbling utter nonsense, Coryo watched piss and cum leak from her folds leak onto the bed.
It was... entertaining.
Smirking to himself, he decided to continue fucking himself balls deep into her cunt, which resulted in more cries of pleasure, well more of pain this time, as he fucked y/n harder than ever before. He had to watch it again, no matter how many times it took.
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Tags: @etfrin @hearts4court @snows-wife @delusionalbunni @kiraflowersworld @victory-scream0462 @curled-hair-red-lips @morallygrayboys @phoward89 @xoxo-eyeballs @thereeallink @graciouslyc @acidaciruela @wanda-maximoff-enthusiast @firstworldproblemthings
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faggy--butch · 3 months
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I saw you mention Jammidoger and I'm a little ? about the context, can you elaborate? Have a great day no matter what tho
Sure! Last year, Jamie did a video with OBGYN Mama Doctor Jones, who is a wonderful person to watch, she uses gender neutral language to talk about reproductive care, talks about trans care, all that good stuff. The video in question is an interview with Jamie, in which he does talk about how trans men deal with a lot of medical transphobia in general but especially in reproductive care, but then be says something along the lines of "But this is a small violin in comparison to what trans women go through" This didn't sit right with me whatsoever.
He minimized everything that he said just seconds before.
We know for a fact that cis women are marginalized in the medical system, that cis women die from lack of care when it comes to all sorts of things but especially reproductive health.
Trans men and mascs deal with that but WORSE. Just an example is that when you are on testosterone, it can be harder to know when you are ovulating or pregnant, and if doctors are already unwilling to listen to AFAB people ( and I say AFAB in this very specific medical context) think of how much harder it is for trans men to navigate.
It can and Has killed us. Robert Eads was denied medical care over and over because he was legally male, and he died of Ovarian cancer. That's serious! that's no small violin. It was kind of crushing tbh to hear him say this. Jamie obviously comes from a place of privilege, he was able to fully transition and I'm happy for him but that's no excuse to be reductive and ignorant.
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junggunz · 4 months
Text
crew love | 🔞
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summary: sometimes dick appointments don't go as planned... cw: fembodied!reader, there is ZERO plot, pwp, smut, fwb!samuel, fwb!eli, fwb!johan, fwb!jake, reader really said why have one bitch when you can have four-, fivesome-ish...each of the crew heads take turns with reader, mentions of masturbation, oral (f and m receiving), fingering (f receiving), lazy handjobs and blowjobs, c*ck drunk reader tbh, p in v, multiple positions, multiple orgasms, degrading dirty talk...mostly from samuel, jake calls reader 'pretty girl' once, everyone is 18+, bukakke ending, honestly there's a lot going on let me know if i missed anything. wc: 4.2k words that's crazy bc i shortened this by a lotttt. an: absolute insanity and peak degeneracy. a late merry christmas and an early happy new years from me to yall hehehe.
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“And here I thought, my favorite slut was just a cute nickname for you. I never would have guessed that you were running around fucking these punks when I was too busy for you.” Samuel laughs dryly, his jaw clenching as his eyes drift over the other crew heads. 
Eli was just some runaway. Johan was a crybaby. But Jake Kim was a part of your little roster? You knew better than to even mention Jake around Samuel, but the fact you more than likely compared them when you talked about your sexual escapades with your friends was enough to get him seething with rage.  
It was truly an unfortunate coincidence when you sent a text to all four of your fuck buddies telling them to come over on the same day. While juggling so many guys at once, you anticipated that at some point, you would fuck up and remember wrong details about the wrong guy or even call one of them the wrong name at least once. But to screw up on this scale was beyond your imagination; you blame your overly chaotic life that caused you to seek out relief in the form of casual sex. Besides your schedule being all over the place and causing conflict, each of these men catered to a specific need you had.
Samuel provided you with rough, degrading sex that left you drunk on his cock. Johan gave you the illusion of having some sense of control in your life as you basically coached him into being the perfect fuck. Eli easily played the role of being a friend you happened to sleep with—oftentimes, him being the one you try out your new tricks with— And last but definitely not least, Jake was the one who could give you both a shoulder to cry on and a dick to ride on after a long day. They all had their own quirks and strengths that catered to whatever you needed throughout the week. Trying to pick a favorite was out of the question because you weren’t sure if you felt emotional attachment to any of them. There were no blurred lines or confusing boundaries, the basis of your relationship with all of them was just sex. And all four of them were good in bed or else you wouldn’t have bothered to keep their numbers.
“Well, now what? This isn’t the first time we’ve met under strange conditions and it probably won’t be the last.” Eli says, his tone even but with a flair of nonchalance as he sits down on your couch and looks at the other men in your living room.
Samuel alone is able to make the atmosphere tense with his disdain for Jake but everyone else in the room seems to be more baffled by the current situation you’re all in. It’s almost comical but it’s more awkward than anything and you wish the ground would swallow you whole.
“I came all this way to get my dick sucked and I don’t wanna leave with blue balls so, if you all could kindly fuck off—” Johan states bluntly only for Samuel to interject.
“What do you think I’m here for? Do you think I came to have a meeting with you fuckers again?” 
Jake who had been silently off in the corner, mind going at a hundred miles per hour as he contemplated his relationship with you after finally digesting the fact he had been sharing you with three other people, suddenly speaks up. When you hear the words that fall past his beautifully flawed lips, you swear that he has finally lost his mind. And to make matters worse, it seems like the madness is shared when everyone including Samuel agrees after taking a few moments to deliberate amongst each other; blatantly leaving you out of the conversation and not letting you know their gameplan.
Who would have thought that this day would be the ultimate test of how well these four could work together? Hands are all over your body, impatiently pushing you down the hall to your room and sitting you down at the ledge. Filling the spots on the bed on either side of you are Samuel and Jake; Samuel moving quickly to make the first move and assert his dominance. Inked hand roughly grabbing you by the chin, he turns your head to face him so he can plant his lips on yours. Lips parting in a salacious moan from his treatment, he seizes the opportunity to force his tongue into your mouth; tasting you before you could be tainted by one of the other three men surrounding you. Though Samuel is adamant on staking his claim on you first, Jake has no problem latching his lips onto the exposed column of your neck. The way his lips gently feather across your skin to make you squirm then gradually get more intense is the complete opposite of how Samuel is fierce with you from the get go but they both share the talent of easily turning you into a mindless, lust drunk mess with just their lips. With so many hands on you, you can’t tell who’s unbuttoning your shirt or who’s hands are snaking up your skirt to tease you through your underwear. You barely have any time to process Samuel pulling away from your lips because Jake occupies them as soon as the opportunity arises. You think you can recognize the feel of Samuel’s palms cupping your breasts and treating the tender flesh as stress balls. And you’re almost certain that it’s Johan who’s kneeling between your legs, pressing his face into your panty clad pussy while Eli is off to the side, keeping your legs spread.  
It’s only after Samuel’s hands have freed the supple skin of your tits and you have him and Jake latching on to your nipples, you’re able to see what’s going on to confirm everyone’s position. Even with the fabric barrier of your underwear, the way that Johan was greedily slurping your arousal through the fabric had your head lolling around dumbly. Your body was burning hot and the temperature was only rapidly increasing due to all the hands and mouths currently on you. Samuel’s tongue flickers over the perky bud of your nipple, leaving tepid trails of saliva in its wake. Jake’s mouth was surrounding the other, every so often grazing his teeth along the sensitive skin. When you look over at Eli with apologetic eyes, he only gives you a sly smile as his hand strokes your inner thigh; silently letting you know that you would always be worth the wait for him. 
So greedy to feel as much of you as possible, when Samuel moves back to your lips and Eli is able to have a taste of your breasts. Getting in just a few sucks and bites, Eli is more interested in getting back between your thighs when he sees Johan pushing your panties to the side. Kissing his way down from your chest and his lips marking every patch of skin exposed by your haphazardly arranged clothing, Eli’s teeth skim along your thigh and cause you to shudder. 
The moment Johan’s pretty fingers spread apart your sticky folds, everyone momentarily halts what they’re doing to look at the sight in awe before everything ramps up in intensity and your clothes are being pulled off your body. Easing a finger into your slick hole, Johan begins to move it in and out of you steadily; basking in the sensation of your tight walls stretching to accommodate the intrusion of the lone digit. Not too long after that, he’s grabbing you by the thighs and yanking you forward until your back falls flat against the mattress, your upper body no longer propped up Samuel and Jake. Even with the adjustment in position, Jake’s mouth had remained stuck on your chest; finally able to cup both tits in his hands when Samuel sits back on his knees after deciding he wanted something else, reaching for your hand and guiding it to palm the bulge in his boxers. 
Attention disproportionately divided between the four men as their hands needily grope you, Johan occupies the most of it when his fingers enter you again. Palm facing up with his ring and middle fingers pressing against the spongy spot within your walls, your breathing is uneven with moans getting stuck in your throat.  His fingers don’t move particularly fast or deep but they apply a consistent pressure against your sweet spot that makes your thighs shake and would have had your hips bucking if Eli wasn’t the one keeping your lower body firmly pinned against the mattress and your panties out of the way for Johan. With just a few firm pushes into the same spot, Johan makes your pussy squirt and Eli is quick to lean in and claim the first taste of your honey; earning a small glare from the man who had actually brought you to your orgasm. Immediately after Eli pulls away, Johan’s tongue is lapping at your clit to taste your release. Fingers still inside you, Johan repeats his same movements from earlier to make more of your nectar spill out of you before he leans in to drink your juices straight from the source. 
“Open up, sweetheart.” Eli coos softly to get your attention, now kneeling beside you with his cock out which you respond to by gently holding the base of his length and guiding it into your mouth. 
Only a few seconds into sucking on Eli, you feel Samuel slapping the heavy tip of his own erection against your cheek until you turn to him and give him the same treatment. You try your best to simultaneously stroke both of them and alternate giving them your mouth, but Johan is still having his fun between your legs and playing with your sensitive pussy, in search of other spots to make you see stars. At this point, any type of contact on your private parts gets you to thresh and writhe; your brain so muddled that it takes Eli and Samuel constantly reminding you that you were supposed to be giving them your mouth. 
Things had just started and you were already drowning in your own sea of selfish pleasure. Pushing you to lay on your side and accentuating the natural curves of your ass and hips, you watch with hazy eyes as Eli and Johan switch positions; Johan presenting his hard length before you to which you thoughtlessly take in your mouth while Eli’s tongue ravenously licking up the trail of wetness that dripped from your pussy to your puckered asshole that was now easily accessible to him. Your eyes roll back in your head at the feel of Eli eating you out so hungrily. By no means was Johan bad with his mouth and fingers, but Eli was simply a more seasoned lover. With enough practice, the two would be on similar playing fields at some point because they had a similar wild streak masked by their pretty faces. Messily smearing your arousal all over the place, the dominant sensation in your lower half is wet and downright sloppy. There’s a gentle pulsing within you due to the back to back orgasms brought to you by Johan’s fingers, but it is quickly diminishing and being replaced by a new coil of heat building in your stomach.  
Right when you think you’re gonna cum on Eli’s tongue, you see quick movement out of the corner of your eye. 
“I can’t fucking wait anymore.” You hear Samuel growl. 
Impatiently shoving Eli out of the way and lining his length up to your hole, sinking into you with one harsh thrust and starting off at a mean pace. The sudden stretch of Samuel’s cock stings like it always does, but with how wet you are and how heavy his thrusts are, he slips right in. With your senses zeroing in on the intrusion of Samuel’s length, your mouth comes off of Johan, only leaving him with the remnants of your saliva to lubricate his shaft as he jerks off to you being filled by Samuel. 
“Fucking pathetic. Inviting all your fuck buddies over and you can’t even mulitask.” Samuel chuckles darkly, giving your ass several hefty slaps that leave the skin stinging with an almost pleasant burn. 
Dizzy from all the movement and finding yourself on your back again when Samuel’s hands push both your thighs against the mattress so he could plow deep into you, watching your pussy greedily swallow his length. After observing from the sidelines for a bit, Jake joins in on the action and offers his thigh to rest your head on; the exchange being that your mouth was solely his for the moment. The lips on your face being stretched around Jake’s length while your lower lips were being plundered by Samuel, the sound of your moans have died out and the soundtrack of your bedroom consists of the sound of your poor bedframe trying not to break, wet skin slapping against each other with the low moans and groans of each of your fuck buddies. You don’t have to look at Johan or Eli to know that they were taking a breather, idly stroking their own lengths to the sight of you being wrecked by the two former colleagues. 
No one says anything but everyone can see it on your face. When your mind is venturing off into space as Samuel fucks your brains out, all it takes it Jake gently caressing your cheek or your stroking your hair to bring you back to Earth; looking up at Big Deal’s leader with a more affectionate expression while you suck him off. Of course, Samuel is the only one bothered by this minor quirk; plowing into you harder and deeper like he was trying to ruin your pussy for everyone else by molding you to only take him. But all his brutal thrusts do is knock the wind out of you, making it impossible to warn him before he’s pushing you to your orgasm and causing your walls to squeeze so tight, it forces his cock out as your juices are expelled from your loins. 
“You couldn’t hold it just a little longer, nasty slut?” Samuel groans, giving you another harsh slap but this time on your thigh as he reluctantly pulls away from you. 
The sight of your orgasm signaled that Samuel’s turn was up and since Jake was the closest, he’s quick to claim his spot between your spread thighs, slowly easing himself into your sensitive pussy. As much as it irritates to see Jake so eager to take his place, Samuel moves off to the side; hand wrapping around his angry cock to maintain his hardness. Seeing how Johan and Eli were holding up with only a fraction of his frustration, Samuel started to wonder what kind of things you got up to with either one of the two for them to be so patient in this situation. 
On a regular day, Jake would be better at taking his time with you and building up to a pace that brings you to your sweet release but after waiting so long to feel you and feeling the way your love canal rhythmically throbs around his cock after your finish, it’s like you have him in a trance. Not as rough as Samuel, but definitely more aggressive than his usual self, Jake thrusts into you needily. Your wanton moans mixing in with Jake’s are loud enough to drown out the sound of your bed squeaking in protest. Body so high strung, it comes as no surprise that you can only hold out for so long before you’re calling out Jake’s name between breathy whimpers. 
“What is it, pretty girl?” He asks you, voice wavering ever so slightly as your walls squeeze him even tighter and become more slick around him; his body torn between pushing deeper into your pulsing heat or halting his movements. 
“I’m gonna cum again—” You pant, looking up at him with glossy eyes to top off your sheepish expression; feeling bad for making him wait so long just to barely get any time with you. But Jake could never be mad at you for cumming too soon on his cock. The warmth of your walls gave him a comfort that simply couldn’t compare to other one night stands he had been with. Even in this situation where he had to share you, bringing you to orgasm filled his chest with pride just the same.
Reaching between your bodies, his thumb gently toys with your swollen clit in time with his thrusts, causing a shrill yelp to pour from your lungs before you tremble beneath him, your hips bucking wildly and your walls wrapped around him like you were made for him, it almost tempts into finishing inside you, but he swiftly pulls away. Dick throbbing after being denied of his own climax, his hand wraps around the end of his shaft, lightly squeezing the tip as he looks toward Eli and Johan to see who would call next. 
Despite his eagerness to kick everyone out of your apartment earlier so he could have you to himself, Johan lets Eli go first. Not out of politeness but simply because making mental notes of how everyone else treated your body. Johan may have been at a disadvantage by not having as much experience under his belt as the others, but he was able to make up for it with how quick he learned by observing. Watching the same type of porn you liked may might have given him some insight to what gets you off; however it just didn’t compare to actually seeing in real time how you liked to be fucked. 
Eli moves between your legs, ready to mount you until the wetness of the sheets against his skin nags at him. There had been countless times where he had been able to make a mess of you like this on his own but something about having to kneel in a puddle of your juices that were coaxed out of you by someone else bugs him.
“God, it’s wet everywhere. You’re so messy.” Eli teases softly, plucking you off your mattress and hooking your thigh around his arm as he stands at the end of your bed frame. 
With you no longer laying down, everyone is able to see the faint outline of your figure created by you sweating on the sheets along with the sizable dark, wet stain of your orgasms. It’s so vulgar and dirty, but it’s exactly the type of thing that seems to boost morale amongst the men and make them even more eager to wreck you. 
Balancing yourself on just one foot, it’s up to Eli to keep you stable; one hand tightly gripping your thigh and the other keeping a vice hold on your ass. The moment he sinks into you, your body tenses for just a moment before relaxing in his arms. Being taken at this angle somehow manages to wipe more thoughts from an already barren mind. You feel Eli’s length pummeling deep inside of you, you feel his lips ghosting along your neck and jaw but it’s almost as if there’s disconnect between your mind and body. You can’t even think about how loud you’re being and if you keep it up, you might end up with a sore throat because your moans just keep tumbling carelessly.   
Rutting into you with the perfect balance of passion and primal instinct, Eli genuinely contemplates giving you a nice, warm load right into your cervix so you’d have to keep him around. The only thing that stops him from asking if you want his seed at that moment is the fact that there were three other guys coping with varying levels of sexual frustration and would throw a fit if he came inside you so soon. In the back of his mind, Eli was more than ready to creampie you if you had begged even just a little. 
You don’t even have to string together the words to warn Eli that you were on the verge of another explosive orgasm. He could see it all over your face. He could feel it in how you clutched onto his shoulders and dug your nails into the skin. And the most damning of all, everyone could hear the way your moans escalated in pitch and volume. Your body feels like jelly as you gush all over his length, the only thought in your head wondering how were you going to make it through the rest of the night if things continued on like this? 
After Eli pulls out of you, it’s a literal hand off to Johan; feeling God Dog’s leader put his hands on your waist then bend you over while your hands still clung to Eli. Rough fingertips dig into the meat of your hip as Johan establishes a firm hold on your body, he pushes his hips forward; the harsh thrust cushioned by the softness of your ass. You gasp loudly, not expecting the tip of his cock to hit your sweet spot right away. If he continued to fuck you at this angle, there was no way you wouldn’t come apart with just a few more thrusts—Johan knows that and quite frankly, doesn’t care— It’s proven when he gives you a few experimental bucks of his hips and feels the telltale sensation of your walls clamping down on his cock that lets him know you had orgasmed. With how quickly you cum, your jaw hangs open in shock and no one else is the wiser so Johan continues to lose himself in the sensation of your warm, wet heat. 
“How are you still so fucking tight?” Johan groans out, a delirious laugh rumbling in the back of his throat while he ruts into you, pushing so deep that his full balls are squished up against your swollen pussy lips. “Is it because you’re waiting for someone to bust inside you?” He says, leaning in to whisper the words into your ear. 
You lose count of how many times you cum on Johan’s cock alone but at this point, your walls are so sensitive that even with the undulating, rapid movements of his hips, you feel every vein and ridge rubbing up against you.  
“N-no…” You whimper, despite the very obvious spasming of your walls after hearing his question.
“Just say the word and I’ll fill you up-” 
“If you cum inside, we’re kicking you out.” Jake quickly cuts in after overhearing the brief exchange between you and Johan. 
Rolling his eyes at the latter’s comment, Johan promptly shoves you off his cock; not wanting to deal with the bickering that would ensue if he were to finish inside you like he wanted. Never empty for long, as soon as someone pulls out of you, someone else is filling you up again or moving you into another position before entering you again. It’s truly a group effort to remind you to use your mouth or hands on the other guys when you have one of them balls deep in your pussy, your mind long gone and in a depraved daze.   
It’s only when you get to a point of being barely able to keep your eyes open, your bedroom is filled with an urgency to finish before your body finally gives out. It had been in the middle of one of Eli’s turns when everyone quietly came to the decision to wrap things out and he pulled out of you, your body tiredly sprawled out on the soiled sheets. Everyone stands around you and furiously jerks their dicks before you feel splashes of warmth all over various parts of your body. Even though your vision was mostly fuzzy by now, you could tell by just the locations who finished where. Samuel made sure to paint your face, uncaring of whether he got it in your hair or eyes but ensuring he slapped his tip on your tongue as he shot out the final rope. Eli came all over the outside of your pussy, fondly smiling at the sight as he did so. Jake had mostly aimed for your chest; letting a few stray ropes spray over the lower portion of your face because he knew it would get a rise out of Samuel. And Johan had opted to leave a nice pool of his seed right above your navel since your ass wasn’t an option for him today.
Fucked out and exhausted, you stumble to the bathroom to get yourself cleaned up and make it clear that they needed to change your bedding for you before they left. Once that’s all done, you don’t even bother saying bye to any of your fuckbuddies since it was a normal part of your routine to send them away after cleaning up. You hear your front door slam shut, the electronic deadbolt automatically locking it for you and you assume everyone has left so you could go to sleep but the sound of footsteps approaching your bedroom again makes you slowly sit up and look toward your doorframe. 
You thought you didn’t have a favorite crew head, but when you see that he’s the one who decided to stay behind, you perk up as you welcome him back into your bed. Whether it was simply enjoying each other’s company or just resting before going for another round of sex, you’re glad it’s with him. 
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moonlightspencie · 1 year
Text
bloodmoonlit
Description: Six years of friendship with more simmering beneath the surface. They thought they had no chance (but that’s romance).
Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!Reader
Warnings: drinking (a lot of it tbh), both of em being massive dorks, 18+ pls bc it gets mildly spicy at the end
Word Count: 5.4k
A/N: glitch is one of the best songs on midnights & nobody can convince me otherwise. anyways i didn’t proofread this sorry but i’m selfish
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She was a hunter. He was… Also a hunter. Classic meet-cutes get a lot less cute when you’re meeting over the corpse of a wendigo.
Dean looked at her with awe and wonder after watching her use a flamethrower to take down a few wendigos that had started in on him. She lowered it like it was nothing after they stopped screeching into the night.
“Hey,” she greeted with a little smile. “You’re one of the Winchester boys, aren’t you?”
“Dean.”
“You’re like a modern-day folklore story, you know that?”
He chuckled, sure to make a comment about the flamethrower at the first chance. He got her number at the second chance.
They made fast friends at that point, both relentlessly flirting. Both never quite sure to what degree the other meant it.
Dean always found himself making trips towards wherever she was more often that what may be considered necessary. She never intentionally ran into him, but if she saw that impala roll up to a case, she always obliged her time. Especially if that meeting happened in a crowded bar where she could relish in the feeling of his attention being placed on her rather than anyone else who would immediately say yes to a night at his motel. Those green eyes sparkling as he chatted her up like they were the closest of friends.
Until they were the closest of friends, of course.
“How’s, uh…” Dean trailed, trying to think. “Was it Matthew?”
She snorted. “Didn’t last long.”
“Why not?”
“Never do,” she said curtly, sipping at her drink. “Non-hunter relationships don’t exactly work for me. They end up with too many questions too quick.”
He hummed, looking down at his own drink. She watched him for a moment, letting herself take a moment to admire the way neon lights bounced off his face. He always seemed to look extra pretty that way.
“Situationships,” she stated as a start, “That’s what pretty much everything I get into ends up as. Whatever works in the moment, no real strings.”
“And yet you always talk about wanting to be tied down,” he said with a smirk.
“Always is a big word,” she replied with a laugh. “I think someday I’d like that. Just don’t think it’s compatible with who I am right now.”
“You think you’re gonna change?”
“I’m always changing. That’s life, right?”
He shrugged. “I don’t think I’ve changed much.”
She laughed.
“I’ve known you for a year, and even in that time you’ve gotten a little different.”
He quirked a brow. “How so?”
“Laugh a little less, but still seem a bit happier. More accepting of life as it is, I guess.”
He sat with that for a moment, then nodded.
“I’ve had to. Every time I get stubborn, I end up screwing everything up.”
“Hey,” she said softly, pulling him out of his own head before he dug too deep, “You’re always learning. Always growing. Don’t beat yourself up.”
He smiled softly, letting her words carry him out of that out. They tended to do that more and more as he faced everything the world threw at him. His affection slowly morphed into more, and he tried not to panic about it. He did what he always did best: buried it as deep as it could go.
She realized her own feelings shifting, but her realization slammed into her like a truck. They were supposed to be just friends.
It all started with little chance meetings which turned into weekly calls which turned into “Do you want to stay with Sam and I? We’ve got a permanent place now”.
She ended up moving in shortly after the boys did. Three years of knowing them, she never expected to be living with them. Especially after all they’d gone through.
Granted, she helped with some of it. She was there when they had to cram Sam’s soul back in his body. She was there for the rise and fall of Dick. She was there when Dean came back from Purgatory.
She just wasn’t constantly with them. Only a kind of side-character in their grand adventure. Now, however…
“I think that’s all,” she said, dropping a few bags on her bed.
“Oh, right, because this isn’t over-doing it at all,” Dean said, humor lacing his voice.
She narrowed her eyes at him, then looked back around the empty room.
“I just— I’m excited to feel at home. I haven’t had a real place in…” she stopped, sighing.
“Yeah, I get it,” Dean spoke up, slinging an arm around her shoulder. “I was so excited to have my own bed, you have no clue.”
“I have some clue. You sent me like fifteen messages about it within the span of ten seconds,” she laughed.
“I love that memory foam, what can I say?”
“How about you get useful and help me set up shop here?” she asked, smiling at him as he already started pulling items out of the bags.
The bunker was like a hunter paradise in her eyes. She got the chance to have a place to call home. She got her own room, a million lore books, Dean, a place to do some baking, her favorite mug…
Wait. She couldn’t find her mug.
“Dean, where’d you put my mug?” she called out before he even got to the kitchen
“Stop calling me out before I’m even in the room. It’s creepy,” he said with a chuckle, walking in.
“Can’t help it. I know how you sound walkin’ around in here.”
She turned from the kitchen counter where the coffee was brewing. He watched her for a moment, smile still stuck in place.
“So?” she asked.
He raised a brow. “So…?”
She sighed. “My mug?”
“Oh,” he exclaimed, walking further towards her to open the fridge. “Made soup the other day and didn’t have any clean bowls.”
He pulled out the soup-filled mug, handing it in her direction. She quirked a brow, looking inside of it.
“I ain’t cleaning that out.”
He sighed dramatically, walking towards the sink.
“Guess I’ll do it. Princess can’t handle a few chunks of chicken in her precious mug.”
She smacked his arm lightly, scoffing.
“You’re the one who put chicken in it in the first place. You know that’s my favorite mug.”
He smirked, silently cleaning it out for her. When he was finished he turned, handing it off as he leaned against the counter.
“If my coffee is soup-flavored I’m going to have Cas smite you,” she mumbled, pouring it full.
She filled up another mug she’d pulled down in the meantime, sliding it to Dean.
“And yet, you still get me my coffee,” he said, pressing a kiss to her temple.
She hid a smile, shaking her head as she prepared hers.
“You know you love me,” he sang to her, heading towards the library.
She followed after, not even realizing what she was doing until she was halfway there. It was like they were attached at the hip.
They practically were over the following months, never not wanting to do everything together.
“Come on, Sam,” she whined. “You’re no fun.”
He smirked, attempting to leave the kitchen.
“Not all of us want to get plastered on a Tuesday night.”
“Speak for yourself” Dean said with a sparkle in his eye. He looked at Y/N. “You love getting screwed by me, right? Oh, sorry, with me.”
“Oh, yeah. My favorite activity, actually,” she said back with a smirk.
Sam sighed, rolling his eyes as he stood.
“I think I’m about done listening to you two flirt, anyways.”
“Aww,” she started, leaning closer to where he stood. “You gettin’ jealous, Sammy?”
“I’m getting grossed out,” he laughed. “Goodnight.”
The two at the table said a quick goodnight, turning back to their drinks and their jokes in an instant.
“Maybe we just need to sweat it out,” he jokes, brows dancing suggestively.
She laughed. “In your dreams, Winchester. We’ve gone almost six years without a slip-up, do you really think now’s a good time to break that record?”
He contemplated for a moment, fully believing it was a good time to break it. He couldn’t think of a better time with the exception of five-and-a-half years ago. But, he decided to actually use his brain.
“Guess you’re right.”
She smiled, pretending not to be thinking about the fact that she definitely thought she was all wrong. She really though that he should have known better than anyone that she believed records were made to be broken.
“I’m always right.”
“Now you’re dreaming,” he said with a chuckle, tossing back the rest of his drink.
He poured two shots, sliding one to her.
“Here’s to almost six years— what, like, five years and ten months? Something like that?”
She nodded. “July 7th.”
He stilled a moment, not thinking about the fact that of course she would remember the day they met.
“How many days is that?”
She hummed, playing into his little game as she pulled out her phone. She typed away until she got her answer:
“2119 days if I did the math right.”
“Nineteen or ninety?”
“Nineteen.”
“What do you say we have a special celebration if we get to twenty one ninety, then?”
She snorted. “What do you constitute as special?”
“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” he winked, tossing back his shot.
She mirrored his actions, then quickly typed away again.
“What do you know? 2190 is exactly the six year mark,” she smirked. “Alright. Deal.”
Weeks passed, and life was shockingly normal in that time. Well, normal for their standards, which still included all the things that go bump in the night. After a particularly long hunt, getting back to the bunker was a relief.
All three of them went to their respective rooms to get some rest, but, as had become a pattern, Dean went knocking on Y/N’s door. She opened with a tired smile, inviting him in.
They sat around, talking about whatever topics came to mind, listening to music playing in the background. When conversation fell quiet, an idea struck her like lightening.
“Come on, Dean. A little dancing wouldn’t kill ya,” she said, moving a little to the music.
He laughed, watching her from her bed. She held out her hands, and finally took them after a few seconds. She could be very convincing, he thought.
They jumped around the room in an un-choreographed, ridiculous, messy dance that left both of them giggling and out of breath. Her music wasn’t always his style, but he sure didn’t mind listening to her sing every word with a passion as if she’d written them herself.
“See? You love this,” she exclaimed as the upbeat song faded out.
“Only because you’re making me,” he smiled.
She laughed again, starting to turn when a slow song started going. He didn’t let her get far, however, pulling her back into his chest by the hand. He played it off all nonchalant at first, ignoring the smile on her face as a bit he always liked to play anytime he started being affectionate in an unconventional way.
“Really?” she asked.
She reached up, fingertips brushing against his jaw so that he’d look at her again. He smiled softly when she did, just watching her for a few seconds.
“You wanted to dance. We’re dancing,” he said, swaying along to the melody.
“Such a gentleman.”
He smirked, not letting up in the dance. She gave in, resting her head against his shoulder as the music played. He closed his eyes, resting his cheek against her and letting the smell of her perfume lull him in the dance more than the song could. Her gentle humming put a smile on his face that he was grateful she couldn’t see: he was certain he’d look like a lovesick puppy.
As the song faded out, she finally pulled away enough to see him again, both of them still moving as another faded in. She looked at him with a glimmer in her eyes. He took in a slow breath, watching her face for a few moments, their movements slowing. He wanted to kiss her more than anything. So, he took an action:
“I’m gonna grab a drink.”
He untethered himself from her, quickly making an exit to leave her alone and deeply confused.
She sat in the library a few days later, reading a book she found on werewolf mating habits.
“What do ya got, there?” Sam asked, walking into the room.
She glanced up, a brow raised. “You don’t want to know, trust me.”
Sam snorted. “Alright.”
“You need something?”
She closed the book, setting it down on the table.
“Yeah. Do you want to hang out? I just hooked up a new TV in my room.”
“Sure,” she shrugged. “When?”
“I’m making popcorn right now.”
She laughed, agreeing as she got up. She got comfortable in his room, back against the headboard of his bed. He walked in a minute later, handing over the bowl of popcorn as he settled in.
“Is Dean coming?” she asked.
“No. He went out for the night.”
“Ah,” she said softly after a beat.
Sam straightened up, looking at her.
“He didn’t invite you?”
She shook her head. “Nope.”
“He always does. Why not now?”
She sighed, settling into the cushions, still looking ahead.
“I think I freaked him out. We were in my room the other night, and I asked him to dance with me. He did, but then… I don’t know,” she shrugged. “After a couple songs he left fast and he’s definitely been pulling away from me since then.”
“Hey,” he called, grabbing her attention. “Anyone who doesn’t appreciate you isn’t worth your time. You know that, right?”
“Thanks, Sammy,” she smiled, looking down again. “I just keep getting in my own head.”
“When aren’t you?” he joked.
“You jerk,” she said, tossing a piece of popcorn at him. “I’m trying to be, like, open right now.”
“I know,” he drawled, leaning his head against hers.
She brushed a few pieces of his hair off her forehead.
“Maybe I just need to go out and have some fun myself,” she said after a moment.
He perked up.
“Dude, yeah!”
He stood abruptly, holding out his hands for her. She took them, standing slowly, and looking around the room for some stray confidence so that she wouldn’t back out.
“Tell you what,” Sam started, giving her the hope she wanted, “You go get ready, and we’ll head out together. I’ll be your wingman.”
She smiled. “That sounds great. I immediately wasn’t sure about heading off by myself.”
“I could tell,” he laughed.
She got ready in record time, putting on her favorite dress for good measure. They left the bunker, hitting a nearby bar that didn’t have an impala parked anywhere close.
“They’re just… giving me nothing,” she said with a sigh, slumping in the seat next to Sam at the bar.
“What do you mean? That last guy looked really into it.”
“He was. He was also into talking about his ex-girlfriend within the first few minutes of conversation,” she snorted. “I think I’m asking too much. I should just find someone and make out with ‘em.”
“You sure about that?”
She looked at Sam again, a smile breaking out.
“No. But if we do another shot, I might be.”
He sighed, obliging her only because he knew she’d do it without him anyways. They threw back the shots, and he wished her luck as she went off in search of someone who wanted nothing but a good time.
Well, kind of a good time. She wasn’t sure she really wanted to take some dude home.
She went onto the dance-floor, deciding she’d let someone come to her rather than prowling for herself, and got her wish pretty fast. A moderately attractive man caught her hand as she swayed around by herself, asking for a dance. She plastered on a smile as she agreed, letting him take the lead.
“What’s your name?” he asked over the music.
“Do you really want to know?” she teased.
He smirked. “Guess it’s more fun not to know, huh?”
She smiled again, pulling him down to her lips as they moved to the music. She closed her eyes, appreciating the ease at which she got what she wanted. The only problem is that she couldn’t help imagining it was Dean instead of Unnamed Bar-Goer.
Regardless, she justified that they were merely using each other, so who cares if she let her mind run a little wild?
She only backed away when he started getting a little handsy for her tastes. She thanked him for his time, walking away and back to Sam. He raised his brows when she came back.
“Hey, looks like you got it,” he said, watching her sit. “Also looks like you aren’t too happy.”
“Still giving me absolutely nothing,” she said with a sigh. “Not a damn thing.”
He chuckled. “Maybe this plan didn’t work out so well.”
“Still got to drink with my favorite giant,” she noted with a wink and nudge.
“Ha ha. Real flattering, thanks.”
He rolled his eyes, but let himself smirk when she wasn’t paying much attention. They sat talking at the bar for another hour or so before Sam decided to call it a night. She linked an arm around Sam’s as they walked out of the bar, definitely a little more drunk than she intended to get.
Dean walked into the bunker, spirits effectively dampened. His attempt to get his mind off of his I-almost-kissed-her moment didn’t work in the slightest, and now he was in a sour mood as a result.
His mood only worsened when he saw Sam and Y/N stumbling into the kitchen, the latter a drunken mess in an outfit he liked a little too much. He watched as Sam helped her into the room, practically propping her up against the counter.
“What the hell?” Dean asked as his brother got a glass from the cupboard.
“What?” Sam defended, filling up the cup with water.
“For one, why is she laughing at herself against the kitchen counter?”
Sam rolled his eyes. “We went out.”
He walked over to Y/N, handing her the glass. She sipped at the water, then set it down just as quickly.
“Done,” she cheered.”
“No, you’re not,” Sam said, picking up the water and giving it right back to her. “Come on, you’re going to be hungover tomorrow.”
She refused the drink, kicking off her shoes. Then, she turned to level her gaze at Dean as he sipped on a beer.
“And where did you go run off to?”
He raised his brows. “Does it matter?”
“Yeah,” she stated with finality.
“Out.”
“Get lucky?” she asked, more bitterness in her tone than she meant to let out.
“No.”
She rolled her eyes, then glanced at Sam again.
“Wanna go hang out and read? I found a book about how werewolves get it on,” she said, giggling as she ended the sentence.
“What?”
Dean spoke up again. “Since when do you go out and get drunk without a reason?”
She snapped back to him. “Since I was celebrating me. I’m done chasing after guys who don’t want— What was it, Sam? Like if they don’t appreciate me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean asked back, setting down his drink.
“Sammy, I wanna talk to Dean by myself,” she managed to say, hardly looking at him.
“I don’t know—”
“Sam,” she cut him off, watching him.
He put his hands up in defense, walking out of the room. She watched until he left, then looked at Dean again. He glanced sideways at her as she swayed slightly while she stood.
“You know, those six years are coming up real soon, De,” she said, staring from across the counter.
“Are they?” he asked, wondering where this was going.
“Mhm. One more week I think,” she hiccuped. “Sorry.”
He furrowed his brow. “You’re drunk.”
“I tried kissing someone today,” she said, words tumbling out fast like she couldn’t control them. “I hated it.”
He paused, unsure why she was saying this. His heart hurt more than he thought it would, hearing her admit that.
“Why?” was all he could manage.
“Why’d you go out without me?” she countered. “You never go out without me, not since we met.”
He sighed, eyes closing as he braced himself against the counter. He heard her as she got closer, eventually leaning her head against his arm.
“I’m glad you didn’t go home with anyone today.”
He swallowed, unable to look at her. “Yeah. I— I was gonna try, to be honest, but…”
“I’m gonna throw up,” she said, suddenly moving to the sink.
He followed after swiftly, helping her as best as he could. He pulled her hair back gently as she emptied her stomach into the kitchen sink.
“You’re okay, sweetheart,” he said softly, rubbing her back with the hand that wasn’t holding her hair. “Get it all out.”
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, sniffling.
“I’ve seen you worse,” he said with a smirk. “That upset about what I said?”
If she had been a touch more sober, she might have realized he was joking. Unfortunately, she took it completely literally.
“I didn’t mean to. I just thought about you and some—”
“Whoa, whoa. Hold on, I wasn’t—” he paused as she stood again, running the sink to clear it out. He turned it off again, impatient. “What are you talking about?”
“What?”
He watched her as she straightened herself out, pulling down the skirt of the dress she was in where it had ridden up.
“You threw up over me mentioning—”
“Dean.”
“Why?”
She sighed, leaning down to rest her head on the counter.
“I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“You kissed someone. I didn’t even get that far.”
“Why do you care?” she asked, standing again, and nearly falling over.
He caught her gently, but kept his hard tone as he responded to her.
“Why do you?”
“Because I just do, Dean.”
“You’re so freaking stubborn,” he muttered, rubbing his eyes with one hand.
“You’re one to talk. This is all your fault anyways.”
“Excuse me?” he asked, annoyance in his voice.
“It’s your fault,” she said, punctuating the phrase with a slap to his chest.
“Yeah? And how’s that?”
“You should’ve just kissed me instead of chickening out and running away like a little boy.”
He was stunned into silence, his anger dissipating and then quickly returning.
“If you hadn’t made me dance with you, I wouldn’t have been all in your face in the first place,” he shot back.
“You’re such a dick,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Six years of not chasing anyone but you, and for what? You’re acting like a bitch.”
“Well, jokes on you, sweetheart,” he exclaimed, opening up his arms. “Hasn’t even been six years.”
“Great! Let’s hope we never get there, then!”
“You’re being ridiculous.”
“I’m not the one who ran off to get a hookup because I couldn’t handle my feelings.”
He scoffed. “Yeah, you just ran off to make out with someone because you couldn’t handle your feelings.”
“Why do you feel the need to make everything so difficult?”
“Because you’re the most difficult person I’ve ever met,” he said, voice raising to an octave you didn’t often hear. “How else am I supposed to deal with you?”
She groaned in frustration, pushing past him to leave. She stalked out of the kitchen, only making it so far as the hallway before she was getting pulled back.
“Stop it, Dean,” she all but yelled.
He rolled his eyes, pulling her closer and leaning down to kiss her. One hand found her face, a surprisingly gentle touch in comparison to how intense the kiss was. She felt like she couldn’t catch her breath, a smile on her face as he finally gave in. He pulled back a moment later, though not without an internal struggle.
“The douchebag at the bar kiss you like that?” he mumbled against her lips.
“Not exactly,” she sighed. “What took you so long?”
“You weren’t making moves either, loser,” he said with a laugh.
“You didn’t exactly make yourself out to be available, De.”
“And you did? You literally told me I wouldn’t get you in my wildest dreams a few weeks ago.”
She paused, a smile spreading to her face.
“Touché.”
“How about now?”
She quirked a brow. “You propositioning me, Winchester?”
“If I was, what would you say to that?”
“I’d say that I think there must be some technical malfunctions in the universe for me to get that lucky.”
He smirked, slowly backing her until she was pressed against the wall.
“Early celebration?”
“Only if we still celebrate when we hit twenty one ninety,” she said with a smile. “Gotta safeguard, here. Easier for me to make sure this doesn’t become a one-time thing.”
“You think I’d be able to stop after one time? It’s you,” he said, moving in closer. Her arms wound around his neck. “I’ve been holding out for six years.”
“Not quite.”
“Mm. Close enough.”
He leaned in to kiss her again, this time slow and soft. She kissed back, glad to finally know what his lips felt like against hers. He let his hands wander, holding to her hips and sliding down further.
“You look real pretty in this dress,” he mumbled between kisses.
“Was hoping you’d see it and like it,” she smiled, nipping at his lip. “Just don’t rip it if you decide to take it off me.”
He smiled against her as he leaned back in. He kissed her, deepening it immediately as one hand dragged down her leg. He slotted his own thigh between her legs, adding a little friction that had her gasping into his mouth. He started hiking up the skirt of the dress further. Slowly, purposely teasing her with it. Teasing himself just as much.
Then, heavy footsteps started coming down the hall. They separated quickly and ducked inside the kitchen, hoping Sam would walk past. Unfortunately, they were wrong.
Dean stood behind Y/N quickly, concealing a problem he didn’t exactly have time to fix.
“Hey,” Sam said softly, seemingly not noticing a thing. “I didn’t hear yelling coming down and needed a drink. You two all good?”
She nodded. “Great.”
“Awesome,” Dean said at the same time.
Sam nodded, giving a tight smile as he walked past.
“We were actually about to head to bed, so…” she said, looking at him as he stood at the fridge.
“Okay,” he nodded, nonchalant. “Night.”
“Night.”
Dean waved a quick goodbye, following after her quickly. They broke into his room, giggling like a couple of drunk toddlers.
“He didn’t hear yelling,” Dean said, closing in on her once the door was shut.
She reached for his belt, quickly undoing it as they got closer to the bed.
“He didn’t.”
He grabbed her by the waist, tossing her down on the mattress, slowly climbing on top of her.
“Wanna test and see if the walls in here are just as soundproof?”
She looked up at him as he finally tugged her dress up around her hips.
“I love a good experiment.”
She laid back in the early morning hours, not even bringing herself to be annoyed that she was being suffocated by a large man on top of her. Mostly because if Dean killed her that way, it certainly would suck, but what a way to go.
She sighed, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead as he rested against her chest. She ran her fingers through his hair until he eventually woke up with the sweetest sleepy smile point at her.
“Hey,” he said, adjusting himself to see her better.
“Hey,” she greeted, accepting a soft kiss. “I think we should’ve done that forever ago.”
“I don’t know. Might be like a wine situation. We let it sit so long that it got even better by the time we actually got some.”
“Very poetic.”
He smiled, a hand coming to rest on her side as he kissed her again. It was slow and lazy and altogether too sweet. She was almost embarrassed that she had to be there to witness how mushy that moment was, if not for the fact that she was on the receiving end of the mush. She pulled away from him first, leaving him to whine.
“You’re so dramatic,” she said in a whisper. “Whining?”
“You were doing plenty of that last night,” he smirked.
“Okay,” she rolled her eyes playfully. “Why don’t we get some breakfast. I’m starving.”
His hand started moving downward, inching up the shirt of his that she was wearing.
“I could eat.”
“Dean,” she warned.
He started scooting down the mattress slowly, not giving up.
“Come on. Kitchen.”
“Ooh, kinky.”
“Cut it out,” she laughed. “Kitchen for actual breakfast. I don’t waste time when it comes to breakfast.”
They made it to the kitchen for that breakfast successfully! Twenty minutes later, anyway.
“Hey,” Sam greeted, not looking up.
“Morning, Sammy,” Dean said, going straight towards the cabinets for cereal.
She realized suddenly that there may have been something she forgot in his room.
“Is that Dean’s shirt?” Sam asked.
She looked down, realizing that it was clothes she had forgotten. Sam paused, raising a hand.
“On second thought, I don’t want to know. Glad to know you’re at least not fighting. Just— Maybe some pants next time.”
She laughed, following Dean to the table as he set down two bowls of cereal. They all sat eating in a comfortable silence. Then a slightly less comfortable silence as Dean grabbed her thigh halfway through breakfast. Sam quickly excused himself after that, a knowing smile on his face as he left.
“So… We’re in the kitchen,” Dean said, leaning towards her. “I don’t think Sammy’s comin’ back anytime soon.”
After definitely not doing anything weird in the kitchen and then totally not feeling bad and scrubbing down the entire room for the day, things fell into a new rhythm. It was comfortable and surprisingly less of an adjustment than they were expecting. All of those years of relentless flirting must’ve made for an easy transition.
Dean cleared his throat a few days later, grabbing her attention as she lounged in the room he’d set aside for TV-watching (with the fun new addition of a couch).
“Yeah?” she asked, looking away from the screen to see him.
“Guess what?”
“Hm?”
“2190 days.”
She smiled. “Yeah? Is that today?”
He hummed, giving a nod.
“What were those special plans of yours?”
He raised a brow. “You really wanna know?”
She merely nodded. He paused the show they were watching.
“I, uh— I was gonna tell you how I felt if I didn’t chicken out.”
“You’re kidding,” she replied after a beat.
“I’m not,” he said with a chuckle.
“Man. Almost twenty two hundred days of a blackout before we finally lit it up, huh?”
He laughed. “That’s one way of putting it.”
She paused, turning to put her feet in his lap. He immediately, started rubbing her leg, enjoying the uninhibited ability to touch her.
“Wanna know something funny?”
He raised a brow in question.
“Years ago someone told me they knew we’d end up together.”
“Who? Bobby?”
She shook her head. “Garth.”
He rolled his eyes as she laughed, poking him in the arm a moment later.
“Got to give it to him, he’s always been perceptive,” she noted.
“Guess so,” he nodded, reluctant to admit it. “Freakin’ Garth.”
She watched him a moment, then retracted her legs. He looked at her, almost hurt with those big puppy-dog eyes.
“Oh, poor baby,” she cooed. “Don’t worry, I’m comin’ closer.”
She crawled over to him, settling in his lap. He ran his hands up her legs, a small smile returning to his lips.
“I can think of a few other ways we can celebrate today, you know?”
“Yeah?” he asked, leaning into the cushions.
“Five words: apple pie in the freezer.”
“Oh, baby, you know how to talk dirty to me,” he groaned, pulling her down for a kiss in a fit of laughter.
FULL MASTERLIST | BUY ME A COFFEE
—————
dean winchester taglist:
@deanwithscissors @hyunjaebaby
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hasello · 7 months
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I was going through your cousins AU and I have to say it’s amazing!
I do wonder how the AU will play out when the events of the respective shows change.
Imagine the rise boy coming to the family get together and showing off their mystic weapons after the first episode. Or just the fact that the rise gang are direct descendants of Oroku Saki. The man the other versions hate the most. Or how 2012 Splitners death will play it, maybe they’ll try to prevent it? Or when the 2003 gang tells them about how they turned into dragons. Or how the 2012 gang kinda disappeared while they were in space (I doubt they’d able to contact anyone)
More importantly how did 2003 Splinter react to Rose and 2012 Splinter being Hamato Yoshi.
omigosh, thank you for both yourkind words and the question, love!
ALL of these are great ideas, that I will for sure think about! There's a lot to explore with this au tbh. But the idea where Rise boys tell the others about their mystic powers got me the most for now, so here:
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sorry the last pages aren't as pretty but I believe low quality makes everything funnier lmao
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lainsshop · 3 months
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We’re Simply Meant To Be 𝜗𝜚
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Pairing: Alastor x Reader
Tags: fluff, human alastor, out of character(?), tnbc, eveloping relationship(?) n probably more..
Song: Sally’s Song & We’re Simply Meant To Be - The Nightmare Before Christmas
A/N: Here we out.. Alastor is so Jack coded in someway like walk with meeee!! Not proud of this one tbh..
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“… I sense there's something in the wind, that feels like tragedy's at hand-” The ringing in your ears and the dust around the destroyed hotel feel up your senses as you try to stand up. You were bleeding out after fighting against Adam with Alastor. You regained consciousness after remembering what happened, you coughed and begin to search for him.
“And though I'd like to stand by him,” You knew that he was okay but the changes are never zero, you couldn’t risk it- you couldn’t risk never telling him what you felt all those years being together before and after dead, even if it was a silly joke-
𝜗𝜚
“If we still don’t have partners by the age of 30, we should marry each other, what ya think?” You playfully suggest as you hand him a glass of rye. Soft jazz could be heard in Alastor’s radio as you both sat on his dining table. “Now, we both know that we won’t have a someone by that age, probably never.” He chuckled. “I know, I know- I was just joking.” You were lying.. deep down you wanted that, you wanted to be next to him and love him more than a friend but something was holding you back from confessing.
𝜗𝜚
“Can't shake this feeling that I have, the worst is just around the bend,” You continued to walk around, you couldn’t even see the rest of the crew so you were probably a lot farther from them. “And does he notice my feelings for him..?” Your legs betrayed you as you tumbled down on the ground, you became dizzy and rested against a demolished wall. “And will he see how much he means to me?”
“I think it’s not to be- what will become of me, dear friend?” You began to questioned yourself as you tried to push through the pain. “Where will my actions lead us then?”
Cough.
“Althought I’d like to join the crowd, in their enthusiastic cloud, try as I may, it doesn’t last… and will we ever end up together?” Questions. Questions running through your head.
What would happened? What if you weren’t so fucking pathetic and just told him everythi- “And will we ever end up together? No, I think not, it’s never to be ecome-“ You looked at your bloody hands as drops of tears started to appeared. This is your final moment? “For I am not the one..”
You were about to close your eyes as you heard footsteps, vague footsteps getting louder and louder and a radio static-
You quickly looked were the sound was coming from and you nearly jumped when you saw him so near to you.
“… Al-” “Shush, my dear, you’re severely wounded so I should suggest to not speak at the moment, hm?” A beat of silence.
“May I?” He was asking about your injury so you just simply nodded and let him do whatever. He started to help you with the wound. As he did that, he suddenly spoke- “… my dearest friend, if you don’t mind,” You looked at him wondering what he was gonna say next but he was trying to look for the right words and he looked at you with a soft gaze. “I’d like to join you by your side,” You felt a swirly feeling, you didn’t wanted to assume what he meant but you knew it was a positive gesture especially coming from him. “Where we can gaze into the stars-“
You see, there was rare moments where Alastor used to speak like this with you when y’all were alive, you never knew what he meant but in that moment you knew what he meant now. He was- “And sit together now and forever, for it is plain as anyone can see,” He gently grabbed your hand and gave it a small kiss. You both looked at each other with a soft smile.
“… we’re simply meant to be.” You both serenaded.
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© LAINSSHOP 2024
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springseasonie · 1 year
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Hate me more | LMH (M)
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Enemies to lovers, Camp counselors Mark x Fem reader
Summary: You really dislike Mark and you're pretty sure he dislikes you too. Ever since he came to the camp last year, he's been nothing short of a headache to you. And now you're forced to work with him this summer, and his mission is clearly to piss you off.
Warnings: sexual content, heavy dubcon/cnc themes, unprotected sex, oral (fem receiving), kissing (shocker), Mark is annoying, so is the reader tbh, may be errors even though proof read
Word count: 7,7k
Song recs: kiss by NCT dojaejung (this is my way of promoting the unit go stream)
A/N: I was gonna write something for the release of golden hour but this took a bit longer than expected 😭 10 days later an I finally finished it lmao please give feedback if you want it's always appreciated
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"Okay kiddos make sure you have all your things before we go back to the cabins okay?"
"Yes Ms. Y/N!"
You gave them a thumbs up as you leaned on a tree, waiting for all the kids to pack up. This was your life every summer for the past 4 years. Being a camp counselor was a lot of work the first time, but by the end of the summer, you had to come back. You loved your kids and they loved you. The staff was always so welcoming and nice. That was true until Mark started the third summer.
He was such an asshole. All the other female counselors gushed over him and his looks. He was constantly flirting with everyone, using his looks and charisma to get himself out of shit. It annoyed you, and Mark instantly took notice. He would side eye you all the time and talk about you as if you weren't friends with everyone else. He didn't really care though, he enjoyed being confronted by you every time he got "caught." Mark found your anger funny, never really taking you seriously.
And now you're paired to work with him this summer.
"Ms. Y/N, where is Mr. Mark? I need help getting something out a tree," one of the kids asked.
"That's a good question honey." You glanced around the area, looking over both shoulders to try and get a sign of him. And of course, he's nowhere to be found. "I don't see him around. We're just gonna have to wait for him okay?"
The little girl nods and runs back to her friends. Ten minutes go by and you start to get annoyed. This happened way more often than you would like to think. Mark disappears to do something or someone for way too long and you're left to take care of the kids by yourself. Sometimes, you almost think it's unbelievable how unreliable he is, sneaking away leaving you alone with 20 children in a forest. But then again, it's on brand for him.
5 more minutes went by and you start to get frustrated. You have no idea what he could be doing that's going to cause all of you to be late for dinner time. "Okay everyone please listen to me okay?" All the kids stop talking and turn to you. "I'm gonna go look for Mr. Mark, but I need all of you to sit in 5 rows of 4. Now." All the kids practically run to sit next to their friends and plop down on the floor.
"Good. None of you move or get up. If anything happens, scream at the top of your lungs okay? I'll be right back." All of the kids agreed as you turned to walk into the forest, going the way you last saw him.
"So fucking irresponsible," you muttered to yourself. "How the hell am I supposed to watch 20 kids by myself?"
You could still hear the kids, so you know you weren't too far away from the area or the trail. This wasn't new for you, always looking for him. It's only been a month since the both of you had to start working together, and he was already making shit hard for you. Mark liked to go hide somewhere. it was either to get away from you, the kids, or to get blown off by some staff member. You couldn't stand it.
"I mean seriously, can't he control himself for one fucking summer," you grumble. "Fucks everything that walks. What an ass."
"Well I wouldn't say that."
Your body jumped violently suddenly hearing his voice next to you. You whipped your head in his direction seeing him sitting, leaning in a tree. Mark had his ear buds in and from where you were standing, you could still hear the music playing.
"Where the hell were you," you asked angrily.
Mark stood up and dusted his pants off as he walked to you. You crossed your eyes, eyeing him up and down. He was so smug about everything. He always looked like something was amusing to him, like there was always a joke to tell.
"Here," he said.
"Clearly. And how the hell do you even have a working phone out here. There is literally no service."
Mark shrugged, wrapping the ear buds around his phone and putting it in his back pocket. "I downloaded stuff before I came."
"Whatever, let's go," you said, rolling your eyes.
"Where are the kids," he asked you, placing his hands in his pockets as he walked.
"In the same place I left them. I had to come get you like you were a lost child. Stop leaving me with all these kids."
Mark smiled in amusement as he walked behind you. You didn't really notice, but you tend to stomp when you are angry. And fortunately for Mark, it wasn't annoying. He actually found it cute, but he wouldn't tell you that.
"Can we take a break? My legs hurt," he whined teasingly.
"Mark, stop playing games. We have 20 kids in the forest waiting for us to come back and the sun will start setting soon," you replied, sighing heavily.
"Oh please we'll be okay."
And at this moment, you've just about had it with him. You turned around, lips pursed at his nonchalant response. Mark stopped in his tracks, looking up at you as you stood on the top of the small hill. "You have one more time to piss me off or I will report you. I'm not joking."
Mark's amused expression washed away as you turned around and kept walking. For the rest of the walk back, he said nothing. Soon enough, the both of you got back to the kids who were still sitting and chatting.
You sighed, groaning quietly. "I'm gonna do another headcount. You get that thing out of the tree."
"Why couldn't you just do it," he complained.
"Because- you know what, just get it out the tree."
You counted all of the kids, double and triple checking everyone and the area around you. Soon enough, Mark got the toy that was stuck in the tree out, and everyone was ready to leave. "Okay everyone you know the drill. Get your buddy and get in line. Mark, you'll watch the back."
"Didn't sound like a question," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets.
"I wasn't asking."
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"I swear to you I will kill him if I'm ever alone with him again."
"He's really not that bad," Somi said, taking another bite of her pancake.
"Please, bad is an understatement," you say as you sit down. "He fucking left me with 20 kids, and then when we got back and I told him how dangerous that was, he says 'but you handled it, right?'"
Somi laughs, clearly amused at your story. You give her a confused look, not understanding why she wasn't siding with you. "Y/N, anything he says makes you angry."
"That's not the point!" Somi stops laughing when she sees how upset you are. "He left me and 20 kids in the forest near sunset to sit on his ass and listen to music. Then got an attitude with me because I was telling him what do when he wanted to act like a fucking child. I'm tired of it, Somi. I've been dealing with this for a month."
"Shit, I didn't think it was that serious," she said, scratching the back of her neck awkwardly.
"We literally could've had a bear encounter or something. I don't want to keep taking responsibility for his shit," you say, sighing heavily. "Anyways, I'm done complaining. Let's just eat."
You went to bed last night still completely angry at what happened in the forest. Mark didn't say anything to you walking back, but your conversation once you got back to the main camp was nothing short of unpleasant. It consisted of all your usual unpleasantries with him. Mark didn't really seem to care much though. You hated that you always let him get a rise out of you once you said you weren't going to do it anymore. And at this point, you had to get to the bottom of it.
You looked around the dining hall trying to find Mark. You knew he was there, he always came late after roughhousing with the kids in his cabin. Searching around some more, you spot him in line getting food. "I see him."
"Please don't harass the man," Somi begged you.
"Too late." You got up and walked to him. You really needed all this bad energy between the both of you to disappear. You weren't too sure about him, but it made every day difficult and you couldn't deal with it all summer. "Hey buddy," you said, tapping his shoulder.
"Didn't know we were friends."
The fake smile immediately turned into a frown. "Our conversation from last night isn't finished."
Mark groaned quietly as you followed his pace in the line. "Why do you keep bothering me if you don't like me?"
"I'm not bothering you, I'm trying to figure out what your deal is," you whisper yell. You followed Mark to his usual seat with the other male counselors, taking a seat right next to him. You were too focused on him to notice the confused stares you got from everyone else.
"Um, hey Y/N," Haechan greeted you awkwardly. "Is this…your new spot?"
"I came to talk to your friend if you don't mind."
"She's crazy," Mark blurted out, making the table laugh.
You smacked him on the arm, making him turn to you with the brightest smile you've seen all summer. And for some reason this was the first time you looked at him without feeling pure irritation. He was actually pretty…cute?
You couldn't look directly in the eyes, fearing that the anger you felt all morning would go away. Instead of speaking, you got up and went back to the table with Somi.
"So..what happened," she questioned.
"Nothing."
"You don't seem too upset by it," Somi observed.
"What..what are you talking about," you said, trying to deflect.
"You can't fool me, you're terrible at lying," she laughed. Somi took another bit of her pancake, but stopped laughing, giving you a look as if she found out something. "Do you like him?"
"Keep your voice down! And don't eat with your mouth full, you look like a damn kid."
"Y/N, do you like him?"
"Of course not! I can't stand the man," you deny.
Somi squints her eyes and side eyes you, but says nothing. You know she doesn't believe you, but it doesn't really matter because either way, you don't like him. "Okay..just know that today is your day to clean the kitchen."
"I know," you said with a sigh.
"And his also," she reminded you.
"Goodness kill me now."
-
You and Mark cleaned the dishes in the kitchen silently, not daring to say a word. There was an unspoken rule between the 2 of you at the moment, first person to speak surrenders to the other for the entire summer. You'll never surrender to him, no matter what it takes (that's what you want to believe anyway.) Mark had been stealing glances for about 30 minutes now, watching you clean meticulously and quietly. He always thought you were pretty, except for when you were being annoying that is. He always thought of himself as the bigger person, despite his childish nature, so he thought he should end this silent game sooner than expected.
"Did you get sleep," he asked.
"Why do you care?"
"I can't be concerned about my friend," he said. Mark chuckled softly when you sucked your teeth.
"Why do you insist on pissing me off," you say, turning to him. "Like I really don't understand why you don't like me. Since you came here last year, I've been nothing short of annoyed with you."
"It's never been my intention, but I just happen to strike those emotions in some women."
"What the fuck does that mean?" You put down the dirty dishes, crossing your arms as you looked at him with a brow raised.
"It means," he replied, turning to you, "that the more women are attracted to me, the less they like me."
You scoffed, getting back to cleaning the dishes. "You wish. You're out of your fucking mind."
"If I'm crazy, then what exactly was that earlier," he asked. You didn't know, but Mark definitely noticed how you backed off of him during breakfast. The way your expression changed, how quick you got up. It almost seemed like you were running from something, and he knew exactly what it was. "I know you like me."
"I don't like you. I just didn't want to talk to you in front of all your friends. They were laughing at me, so I left," you explained. Mark took two steps to you, his body ending up close to yours. You backed up a bit, not understanding why he was close to you, but he followed you again. "What are you doing?"
"Testing something out," he said simply.
"Look I don't know what you're testing but I'm busy. " Just as you moved away from him, he placed his arms beside you, trapping you under him. The both of you have never been this close before. Sure there were times where he had to catch you or hold you for activities in the forest, but there was nothing like this. This was close. This was personal.
"What are you doing," you asked, shock written all over your face.
"Standing here." Mark's lips curled into a smirk as his eyelids dropped once glancing at your lips. "You're pretty."
"Thank you but I really need to-"
"You know," he started,"you never told me what you wanted to talk about before you left the table."
You sighed, making a dramatic pained expression. "Mark, please. Can you back up?"
"No."
You looked up at him, surprised that his face was closer than before. One more move and your lips would've probably touched his. 'Why am I even thinking about that right now,' you thought to yourself.
"I know you wanna kiss me," he said almost in a whisper. Mark chuckled softly seeing the frazzled look on your face. You were so easy to read, always saying you didn't like him knowing damn well you wanted him. He just wanted to make you say it. He wanted to break your prideful attitude down and make you beg for him.
"You are saying insane things right now." You couldn't even look him in the eye, too afraid you would melt under his body. He was too close. You couldn't control your heart beat or your whirling mind. 'Maybe kissing him wouldn't be so bad,' you thought to yourself, but pushed the thought to the back of your head.
"But you didn't say I was wrong," he said, leaning into your neck.
"Mark, seriously." The slight whine in your voice made you want to run and hide from everyone. You felt like you were going to collapse into his hands the closer he got. His voice was so soft, but his presence was still so dominating. It was almost too much for you to bear.
"What would you do if I kissed you right now," he whispered in your ear, a smile on his face. "Would you push me away, take it and get mad, or maybe give me another one?"
You could barely look at him, let alone speak. You had no idea how to respond to him. You didn't even know if you were supposed to. But what you did know is that if he made one more move or said anything else, you would most likely lose your mind. "Mark, it's too early in the morning for this," you said practically begging him to stop.
Mark released his hand from the counter, placing it on your waist. His grip was firm as he pressed you against the counter more, body so close his leg was between yours. "You're not even trying to run at this point. You little liar."
"Mark..what if someone comes in here?"
"Let them. Why do you care? Are you scared," he teased. Mark kissed the spot behind your ear softly, making you gasp. Your body tensed up in his hand, causing him to rub small circles in your waist in an attempt to comfort you. He kept missing down your neck, moving back up to kiss your jawline.
You stood there, still as a tree. Your eyes fluttered shut, taking in the feeling of his lips on your skin. At this rate there was no point in fighting it. He had already won like he did with everyone else. You felt Mark's hand leave your waist, grabbing your chin as he ran his finger down your bottom lip.
"If you want me to stop I will."
You shook your head unconsciously, brows slightly frowning at his words. You were desperate and he definitely knew from the way you were frozen and speechless.
"Good girl." Mark kissed you softly, but deeply. His hand slowly made its way to the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him. You dare to touch him, feeling like it was way too intimate. But before you could even pull away, he kissed you again, this time with even more sincerity. You didn't know why you had such a heavy feeling in your chest, but it did scare you a little bit.
"We have to finish all of this stuff in 15 minutes. You think we can make it," he asked on your lips.
"If you stop fast enough, maybe.."
Mark chuckled softly at your response, pulling away from you. He was clearly extremely turned on, but you were not the kind to help him with his problem, and he knew that. But that didn't stop his mind from drifting, thinking about how hot it would be if you dropped to your knees at this very moment.
"Wasn't that fun Y/N?"
"What are you talking about," you said, covering your face in embarrassment.
"Unwinding instead of having a stick up your ass," he jabbed.
You dropped your hands, scoffing at him. You shoved your way out of his arms, walking to the sink he was at previously. "Gosh, you're so annoying," you mumbled as you scrubbed the dirty plates.
"Yeah but you like it though."
"You wish."
"Proved my point."
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You and Mark haven't spoken since the kitchen fiasco. You said a couple of words to each other when it came to the kids, but nothing more than that. You couldn't even look at him, the shame filling your body once he came into your vision. But one thing was for sure- you definitely didn't hate him as much. You were still very confused. You didn't understand where all those feelings came from for Mark in the kitchen. Maybe your subconscious? It didn't really matter, you just wanted to make sense of everything.
"Okay everyone, tonight is movie night so we need to leave a little early okay," you announced.
Mark leaned on a tree silently watching you as you interacted with the kids. You didn't know that he had conflicting feelings as well. All the teasing and messing around turning into sexual tension was not what he hoped for. He just wanted to mess with you. He wasn't actually going to kiss you for real, but when he saw the desperate scrunch of your eyebrows, how could he resist himself? If it weren't for the kids, he would definitely have his way with you right on the ground, but nothing in his life ever works right.
Mark admired the way you were with them, always so nice and careful. You were careful with anything really, never wanting to come off as irresponsible or rude. But he never cared about any of that. He didn't care if people thought he was a prick or an ass, which is why you were so intriguing to him. He never got a chance to actually introduce himself to you before you can dislike him as easily as you did.
After 20 minutes of walking back to the main site, the sun had finally set and all the kids and counselors went back to their respective cabins before going to the lake for movie night.
"So you're telling me," Somi started,"after all these months of not liking him, he came onto you in the kitchen and you didn't refuse?"
"I know, I know it's humiliating," you grumbled putting on your shirt.
"Enemies to lovers. My favorite trope."
You let out a loud embarrassed groan listen to her words. "We only kissed twice. We didn't say anything to each other for the rest of the day," you added.
"Not even for your group," she questioned.
"Well of course we did, but very little. He was..so distant," you said. You slipped into your jean shorts and put your shoes back on quickly. "I'm gonna go make sure all the girls are ready." You got up and walked outside to see everyone playing around. Just as you were about to round up your cabin, you see Mark who's talking to some of his kids. You wanted to stop staring at him, but you couldn't. You gulped as he glanced at you, giving you a small wave. "I hate him," you muttered to yourself almost as if you were trying to convince yourself it was true.
You shake your head, attempting to push what happened out of the forefront of your mind, but it's hard to do that when he's walking up to you. You turn away from his direction, hastily gathering the girls from your cabin. Just as you were about to make your way to the lake, you were tapped on the shoulder. Turning around agonizingly slowly, you face him with a fake smile.
"Hi," you said awkwardly.
"Hey, so listen-"
"I can't talk right now, we're about to head to the lake," you interrupted.
"I know but-"
"Can't talk."
Mark sighed, looking down at his shoes. He knew you were difficult, but not like this. "Can we talk after the movie?"
"Talk..about what? There's nothing to talk about," you say dismissively.
Mark rolled his eyes, walking away from you. You looked behind yourself, watching him walk back with his hands in his pockets. All that you could hope for was him forgetting whatever conversation he wanted to have with you.
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Your cabin was the first to get to the lake while Mark's was the last like always. The movie started at 7, so thankfully for you, you could be left alone for 2 hours. You leaned against a tree as you watched the movie projected on the sheet quietly.
Unlike you, Mark was watching you silently, eyes never leaving your body as you stared at the screen. He knew you wanted nothing to do with him even after he kissed you, but he wasn't going to let that stop him. He's never been in a situation like this before. Having to chase after you was starting to dampen his pride, but he liked it.
He watched as you whispered to Somi about something, not able to read your lips. Maybe he shouldn't have thought to follow you as you walked away from everyone, but getting to be alone with you came rare, so he had to take his chances.
"Hey, I'm gonna go back to the cabin. I forgot something," he whispered to Haechan.
"Okay, be quick though. I don't wanna be responsible for you," he replied.
Mark gave him a dry laugh and walked away, following you from behind. Mark picked up that you were going to your cabin after a few turns on the trail. The sun was starting to set, so he began to rationalize he weird actions to himself. "It's not weird that I'm following her," he muttered to himself quietly. "I'm just keeping her safe." It was surprising how you didn't notice anyone was following you. You were usually always attentive, but it seems that you were only that way with other people.
Soon enough, the both of you made it to your cabin. You went inside with a big sigh, letting the door slam behind you. Mark would be a kind person and knock on the doors but he wasn't all that kind, so scaring you is the option he went with. Mark quickly went up to the door, opening it quietly. Your back was turned as you rummaged through a bag for something, causing you to not hear his footsteps or the door creaking open.
"Boo!"
"Fuck," yelled, body jumping violently as you turned around. "Mark?"
"Surprise."
You scoffed rolling your eyes at his jazz hands motion. "You're not funny. Now get out, this is a girls cabin."
"I wasn't kidding when I said I wanted to talk." He leaned against the wall, crossing his arms as you went back to looking for whatever you were looking for.
"I really don't care, just leave," you said sternly.
Mark had enough of beating around the bush with you, the constant teasing, and asking dumb questions. He had to know why there was bad blood between you, especially after you let him kiss you that morning. "Why don't you like me?"
"You're kidding." You let out a dry laugh as you turned to face him. "I don't like you? I'm pretty sure it's the other way around."
"I'm just curious because since last year, you never gave me a chance, so I really want to know," he said, lifting his brows with a small smile.
"I want you to tell me why you don't like me first, then maybe I'll consider explaining myself to you."
Mark took small steps towards you, not being able to control the smirk on his face when you furrow your brows in confusion. "You're uptight and rude to me. And you never give me your attention unless it's to be rude with me, and I hate that that's the only way I get to talk to you. You only want to speak to me if it's to tell me how bad of a job I'm doing or how frustrating it is to be around me or work with me."
"That's not true, I-"
"I'm not done." You closed your mouth, intimidated by how commanding his voice was. "Then you go around and say to everyone how much you hate me. I know you complain to Somi and all the other counselors, and that's fine. But next time I would like to hear it from you directly."
"That I hate you?" You gave him a weird look, making him chuckle softly.
"Yes. Tell me that you hate me." He was walking closer to you slowly, arms now at his sides as he looked down at you with hungry eyes. Your arms were still crossed as you stood there, not allowing yourself to show how intimidating he was to you. Your face was calm, but your heart was beating faster with every step he took.
"I'm not telling you I hate you. Can I talk now," you asked.
"Go for it."
"You're fucking annoying and not helpful. You came into this camp last year and made all these friends and everyone liked you instantly. Everyone says you're funny and such a great guy but I have yet to see it. All you've done since you've been here was piss me off."
"You wanna know why," he said. He leaned down to your ear, a smile tugging at his lips. "Because you're pretty when you're angry."
"That's not funny," you said, looking away from him.
"I wasn't joking." Mark moved away from you, eyes going straight to your lips.
"Seriously mark, I don't care that you like to get me riled up, but yesterday was uncalled for. Do you have any idea…will you stop staring at me like that?"
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Mark could barely concentrate on what you were saying. Your expression, the way you spoke, how close the 2 of you were. All he wanted was to just kiss you and shut you up for the night. Mark could barely keep his hands off you, every bit of self restraint coursing through his veins.
You sighed trying to back up from him, but all you did was bump the edge of your bed making you fall back. You plopped on the thin mattress placing your hand behind you to stay balanced on the bed. Mark's gaze turned dangerous, staring at you as if you were prey.
"God you're so hot," he mumbled.
"Mark," you said, his name coming out a bit breathlessly.
Before you could finish your sentence, he pinned your body to the bed. You were dead silent as you watched his eyes move rapidly along your face and body. "Mark..we can't. We have to be back soon."
"Stop fighting it. Just say you want me," he mumbled quietly. He leaned into your neck, breath tickling your skin as you closed your eyes.
You shook your head, brows furrowing as you tried to push the feeling to the back of your head. But the only thing you can think about is how his hands are leaving your wrists as he moves them down your body. Your breath hitched when his fingertips brushed against the slightly exposed skin of your stomach. You didn't stop him as he lifted your shirt, hands attaching to waist firmly.
The both of you stayed silent, the only thing that could be heard was the sound of breathing and your old bed creaking at every movement he made. You watched him as he moved his hands lower, fingers resting on the button of your jean shorts. Mark looked at you for any signs of you wanting to stop, but all he saw was the desperation on your face.
You gulped watching him unbutton and unzip your shorts, lifting your hips as he tugged them off you. Mark took his shirt off, laying it next to your shorts. He hooked his fingers on your underwear, pulling them off you quickly. You let out a small yelp when he tugs you towards him, throwing your leg over his shoulder as he moves between your legs.
'Just get on with it,' was all you could think. You were way too eager to get him between your legs, and at this point, nothing was going to stop it. "Hurry up," you said, breaking the long silence.
Mark didn't say anything or look at you, all he did was smile as his face disappeared between your legs. A small gasp of please leaves your lips as he kitten licks your core. You close your eyes, letting your head fall back onto the mattress taking in every movement. He ran his hand up and down your leg, nails lightly scratching your skin making you shiver. Needing more friction, you begin to grind yourself on his tongue slowly, but he stops you with a hold on your hips.
"We're gonna do this nice and slow okay," he said.
"We can't, we have to get back soon."
"They'll be okay. There's more than enough people out there." Before you could say anything his mouth was back on your core, tongue pressing against your sensitive bud hard. Without thinking your hands made their way to his hair, fingers running through the blonde locks. Mark kept licking at you agonizingly slow, chuckling when you whined for more. He would speed up at moments, flicking his tongue against your clit faster just to tease you, then stop.
"Please," you begged breathlessly, "it feels like I'm being punished."
"I know," he mumbled.
You smacked him on the side of his head softly, making the male look up at you with a brow raised. "I fucking hate you."
Mark chuckled, removing one of his hands from your hip. He didn't take his eyes off of you as he slid two fingers into you, pumping them slowly. Mark watched as you basically fell apart in his hands, moans never stopped spilling from your lips. He began licking your clit, but faster, almost sending you over the edge.
"Shit, don't stop," you whined softly. You couldn't control your hips as you grinded against his fingers and tongue. Your jaw dropped when he fingered you faster. Gripping his hair, your hips moved on their own as you grinded faster. You were so close, your core pulsing on his fingers. "Fuck I'm gonna cum," you whined.
Your whines became louder, the pornographic sounds of your moaning, bed creaking, and sounds coming from Mark filling the empty cabin. This is one the many times you thanked God no one was around. Your eyes rolled back and body shuddered as your orgasm hit you like a truck making you mumble curses that not even Mark could make out. You let go of his hair, plopping back down on your mattress breathing heavily.
"I'm assuming that was the first time you came in a month?" Mark slid his fingers out of you slowly, wiping the digits on your sheets. He moved your leg off his shoulder, lifting himself from between your legs.
"Do you think I'm getting myself off after hiking and being around kids in this damn camp everyday," you asked, rolling your eyes at his statement.
"No. I think you're too uptight to do that," he said with a soft chuckle.
"It's crazy that you're still calling me uptight like I won't get up and leave."
Mark didn't respond to you, laughing softly to himself knowing you wouldn't move either way. He moved off the bed untying his sweats. You watched him as he let his clothes fall to the ground, eyeing his body. Not that you couldn't get it before, but now you see why he was a big deal to the other female counselors.
"Aren't we gonna use protection," you asked, gulping when he was back in front of you.
"I don't have any," he mumbled.
"You're so fucking ridiculous," you grumbled. "You're lucky I'm on birth control."
Mark could barely hear you with how eager he was to see you lose yourself for him. No amount of mean words or insults could turn him off in the moment, every word you spoke sounded like exactly what he needed to hear. "You're so fucking hot when you're mad." His lids dropped as he grabbed your ankles, pulling you closer to him.
"Don't tease, we don't have all night," you whined.
Mark couldn't take his eyes off you as he lined himself with you, slowly entering you with ease. You looked pretty under the light of the setting sun peering through the window. The light hit your eyes perfectly as they rolled back, soft moans leaving your lips at the same time. Mark thrusted into you slowly holding your waist firmly. He wanted to savor the moment, finally able to get you under him, because even though he had you now, he might not ever get you again. It was taking everything in him to not ram into you after every move not wanting it to end too quickly.
With the way he was looking at you you thought he was gonna eat you alive. And in all honesty you would let him. It was conflicting to you that all this pent up aggression towards him exploded into sex, but you were clearly not that conflicted. You would never tell him, but you had always been attracted to him and the kiss was just the tip of the iceberg.
He slid his hands up the back of your legs, pinning them to your chest as he thrusted into you faster. Your moans echoed in the empty cabin, not even thinking about if anyone could be near. "Feels so good," you moaned.
"Who's making you feel good?"
"Fuck..you are," you whined, eyes fluttering shut as you take in pleasure.
"Good girl," he cooed. Mark watched as you slipped your hand between your legs, rubbing your clit at the same place as his thrust. His fingers were constantly kneading your legs, leaving prints in your skin. "You're close aren't you baby?"
You nodded fast, looking at him with desperate eyes. "Kiss me.. please."
Mark didn't have to think twice. He leaned down, capturing your lips in a heated kiss quite literally sticking his tongue down your throat. You sucked on the wet muscle, moaning loudly on his tongue every time he thrusted into you.
"Mark..fuck," you moaned softly. Mark took a hand off your leg, wrapping an arm on the small of your back pulling you closer to him. You kissed him again, moans and whimpers poured into his mouth.
Mark moaned softly against your lips as you squeezed around him, cumming on his length. You pulled away, your lewd sounds becoming louder as he didn't stop fucking you. Mark leaned down, kissing your neck messily as you clung onto his shoulder. Mark has never had this kind of passionate feeling with a person before. It was starting to feel like more than just a sexual attraction to him, maybe he did actually have feelings for you.
"Cum in me," you said cupping his face.
Mark looked at you, brows furrowing in uncertainty. "A-are you sure? I-"
"Please baby just cum for me," you mumbled, completely taken over by the pleasure spreading in your body. "Can you do that for me?"
"Anything for you," Mark breathed out. Your words went straight to his length, his pace speeding up as he felt himself closer to cumming.
Your jaw went slack, eyes rolling back as you felt another orgasm creeping up on you. "Y-you're gonna make me cum," you whimpered.
With just a few more thrust, both you and Mark came at the same time, loud moans and groans filling the space. Mark's body went limp, laying on top of you with his face buried on the side of your neck. No one said anything for a minute, just laid there in each other's embrace trying to catch your breaths.
"I guess you don't hate me after all," Mark joked, breaking the silence.
"Only a little less."
Mark snickered as pulled himself out of you slowly. "Let's get you something to clean up with." He got up and pulled his boxers and pants on. You were sure it was because you just had sex with him, but the way you looked at him was different now. Before you were completely annoyed by his presence, but now even the little faces he made were endearing. Of course, Mark would never stop being an infuriating person to talk to but maybe you like talking to him. Maybe you liked being around him this whole time.
"If you want to go for round 2 just say it." Mark walked back to you with tissues, handing them to you with a smile. He chuckled softly when you gave him a frown for his comment. "Back to hating me I guess."
"I don't hate you Mark," you admit. The words felt unnatural to you, but they were the truth. You don't hate him, and you don't think you ever did.
"I'd like it if you did though," he said, sitting on the edge of your bed. "If what we just did considered hate fucking, please hate me more."
You rolled your eyes, tossing the dirty tissues in the trash bin across the room. "Who said it was gonna happen again?" Mark watched you closely as you shimmied back into your underwear and shorts. "What? Is there something on my face?"
"Yeah." He stood up, pulling you to him, making you gasp softly. Mark kissed you deeply, smiling against your lips when you kissed him back. "We should get back. I think we've been gone too long," he mumbled.
You nodded, kissing him one more time before he pulled away from you agonizingly slow. "Please don't be weird when we get back. I don't want to have to hate you again," you joked.
"Didn't I just tell you I want you to hate me more?"
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"What do you mean you fucked him last night," Somi whisper yelled.
"Yeah..I did..right on the bed you're sitting on."
"Ew ew ew." She shot up from your bed with a frown on her face, making you laugh loudly. "Seriously what is wrong with you, why didn't you say that before I sat down?"
"Thought your reaction would be funny, and it was," you'd aid giggling.
Somi looked at you with disgust on her face, dusting off her body. "Anyways…are you guys like..a thing now?"
"I don't know. I don't think so," you answered.
"Well do you wanna be a thing?"
"Well..I think I do," you admitted. "But I don't know him that well, you know. All I did was have sex with him. What if he doesn't want anything," you said.
"You want me to be honest?"
"Please do."
"I think you should go talk to him. Like right now," she suggested.
"Now? I don't even know if he's in his cabin," you stated.
"Just go. If he's not there, go back another time. You should talk to him while your feelings are still fresh," she suggested.
Somi was right. Even though you thought it was still a bit early to talk to him, you couldn't stop thinking about him all day and all night. Throughout the day, the both of you kept stealing glances, staring at each other but not saying a word. It's been hard trying to keep your bubbling feelings for him at bay, especially when you're working so close for the summer. But Somi was right, it wouldn't hurt to try.
You nodded, sighing softly. "You're right. I should go." You turned walking to the door, but when you opened it, Mark was standing there, hand up like he was about to knock.
"Oh," you said, surprised. "Hi."
"Hey," he said, looking everywhere but at you. "Can I, um, talk to you?"
"Uh, yeah. You wanna talk here or.."
"Just walk with me. Please?" You've never seen him so nervous or unsure before. It was kind of cute. You agreed, leaving the cabin and walking along the trail with Mark.
The first couple of minutes were silent. Neither one of you said anything. The only thing that could be heard were the sounds of your feet on the dirt trial and the laughter of children from afar. But it wasn't an awkward kind of silence. It felt comfortable, he felt comfortable and warm.
"I really like you Y/N," he started. "And I know it might be weird for you, but I just felt like you had to hear it."
His words went straight to your heart, making it beat faster with every syllable. You blinked fast, not really knowing how to respond. You were afraid of coming into him too strongly, saying something that would scare him away, but you had to say something.
"I..like you too," you confessed. Your face was beginning to heat up, palms becoming clammy from the nervousness. You haven't been like this since middle school, all shy and nervous.
"So..where should we go from here?" Mark raised a brow and looked at you. You glanced at him quick enough to not want to run away from the situation all together. He grabbed your hand, making you pause mid step. Your heart was beating so fast you could hear it at this point, and you were sure he could too.
"I, uh, I don't know," you stuttered.
Mark chuckled, clasping his fingers with yours. "I've never seen you so nervous."
"I'm not nervous." You don't know who exactly you were trying to prove that too, but it definitely wasn't him because as soon as you spoke he laughed.
"I think we should start over this summer," he said. "I think we should meet each other for the first time again."
You looked at him confused. "What do you mean?"
"I mean," he started, turning to you. He stopped walking and tugged your hand to look at him. "I mean we should start again from a clean slate. I want to get to know you better on a good note, but only if you're willing."
You gulped looking down at your feet. You must've looked like a kid with the way mark was smiling down at you. "I..I would like that. I'd like that a lot actually." You looked at him, expression going from shy to worriedm. "I'm sorry for y'know being rude and everything."
Mark didn't say anything, allowing your words to linger for a moment before he leaned down and kissed you. The kiss was softer this time, more innocent. Mark pulled away with a small smile on his face. "You don't have to apologize to me for anything. I know I've been an ass, and I'm willing to make up for it."
It was hard to keep a smile off your face and stop yourself from blushing like a kid. "If we do this, will you stop talking to me once we're out of here," you asked.
"Y/N when I said I liked you I was serious. I don't want this to be a summer fling. I actually want to get to know you before I date you," he explained.
Your eyes went wide, completely flustered from his statement. "You want to date me?" Your heart fluttered repeating his words almost immediately, getting butterflies in your stomach. "But I've been so terrible to you and-"
"So? We like each other and we should explore that this summer."
You nodded, a smile tugging at your lips. You let go of his hand and placed it on the back of his neck, kissing him. This was the first time you kissed him. And it felt good. It felt good knowing that you didn't have to keep trying to convince yourself you didn't like him, or that you were never attracted to him. You pulled away, eyes never leaving the man in front of you. You didn't know if this conversation would make a difference for the rest of the day or the rest of the summers, but if Mark was true to a hate he said, you could wait.
But if not, then maybe you just might hate him for real.
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