#super fucking messy vid

[lostinurworld]

#baby I‘m yours #started to learn this to play a love song for you #spilled thoughts #thoughts about you #love #arctic monkeys #messy #super fucking messy vid #i love you with all my heart

[alexandrasavior]

alexandra savior being cute onstage @ mercury lounge

#alexandra savior #live #mercury lounge #mine #mine: as2 #gif #edits #2020 #for the anon i got forever i go who said she's not charismatic: yes she is!!!!!!!! #some of the comments on the vid of the full show are so rude for no reason #one was like 'it's too bad she sounds better recorded than live' #and another is saying she seems high and unhappy which just? she seems v sober to me tbh and she's laughing/chatting between #most of the songs and seems as enthusiastic as someone can be for the tone and style of her music #like she doesn't have fast paced songs and they're for the most part not super happy so what the fuck is she supposed to be doing? god #in the video of the full show you can hear the crowd being fucking obnoxious as shit too lol #at some point someone literally yells 'where's alex?' like go see am or tlsp if you wanna suck alex turner's dick so bad #anyways.... enjoy this messy gifset #🖤

[sug4r-sp1c3]

Hi!

Could you maybe do villanous x a reader who has rabbit ears please? Thanks!!

RULES ARE RULFES NO SPECIFIC CHARACTERS OR THINGS ITS BEING A HC UHHHH

ok lets begin since i'm sleepy ITA 1 AM WHAT THE FUCK

"but sugar-sp1c3 you said your limit was 4 character-" I KNOW OKAYI' JUST FORGOT WHEN DOING THIS

VILLANOUS WITH A S/O WITH RABBIT EARS HCS !!

Characters, Demencia/Dementia, Dr.Flug, 5.0.5(platonic?), Black hat, penumbra, Sun Blast, Miss heed(not in order lol)

Demencia / Dementia

she woudl make fun of then

but like

A LOT

"Hey bunny ears!"

i feel like she would bite them idk

i mean yes she mocks of you BUT THATS HER WAY TO SHOW LOVE TO YOU..at least i think!

she haves 2 sides

the left one where she mocks and jokes and bites of you ears

and the right side where she praises you and your eyes and- you are basically her new black hat

she would often play with them

or if you have both rabbit and human she would be like:

"SO YOU HAVE SUPER HEARING!!?! OMG THATS SO COOL"

Dr. Flug

his first honest reaction is that gif sorry i don't make rules

HE THINKS THEY ARE COOL AND PRETTY ASF

HE MELTS IF THEY EVEN MOVE LIKE

HE JUST STARES AT YOU IN AWWE UNTIL HE SNAPS BACK TO REALITY!

unless his with black hat bc in that case he avoids to look at your ears at all cost since the "jefecito" can notice and idk yeah

he would probably want to do some experiments

but only friendly ones!!

like testing if you can do other things

if you have extra sensitive ears

or somthn idk i have no ideas rn

he would like to caress them on his little free time

oh btw he would LOVE if you and 5.0.5 where like best buddies or you would be his second parent-like figure(i swear i am trying to make his non specified gender I SWEAR GUYS)

he just lvoes you and you ears so much

5.0.5

he's a fucking bear bruh 💀

ok so thsi will be platonic like buddies or a second parental figure, or smthn like that

he loves to "talk" about your ears or ask you questions.(if you don understand them he would force flug to translate lmao)

he is very careful when he is trying to touch them since y'know..big paws

but he still tries!!

i imagine if he maked cupcakes the icing would be a drawing of an airplane, of dementia, a chameleon or a black hat idk, for you YOUR RABBIT EARS AND A HEART BECAUSE I THINK THEY ARE CUTE!!!!

he would even "ask" you to use you as inspiration for any dessert, or drawing or smthn.

i bet if he haves a rabbit plushie he gives it to you and/or puts something on the ears(ribbons, little hats, etc) he would be like "bow bow!" [siblings!]

Black Hat

he probably threats to rip off your ears

and eat them

basically hurt you

DUDE HE IS LIKE THE ANTI CHRIST ON HIS UNIVERSE WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO TURN HIM INTO A ONCELER?

Penumbra

SHE

LOVES

YOUR

EARS

SHE OFTEN POSTS THINSG ON HER INSTAGRAM(with your consent ofc) LIKE "my sweetie's ears where a bit messy today! so me and sun blast fixed them just a lil bit.... loved the result! 🐇💜"

she would ask if you are sensitive to things like sound or something to try to not let a lot of hard things that can cause a hard sound when they fall or make sure Curie or Sunblast don't throw things

she oftenly tries to impulse you to not cover them! but if you like to have them covered, she would be okay with that too!

the same that flug

she would ask to make some little and non-offensive, experiments on your ears

if you don't want, its okay!

if you want, its okay too!

"look! i got you this! i bet it would make your ears fur brighter!..and curie's too"

Miss Heed

okay she would POST LIKE 10000 HISTORIES, POSTS, AND A LOT OF THINGS IN ALL HER SOCIAL MEDIA

LIKE SAYING "HAH MY s/O'S EARS ARE UNIQUE AND YOURS NOT"

but she would never say that out loud.

she would ask to records tiktoks or anything about them, like idk trends, popular songs or just quick vid like "watch me take care of my Sweetie S/o ears!"

if they are sensitive, during the event of when she had everybody under her control or smthn she would keep you away from them

yes she would be a bit sadistic and evil but she still cares abt you

..or she just does the same thing that she did with them..

when she's at..THAT place..she draws in a corner a lot of little ears, like if she misses you and misses your ears..

if you visit, she would beg to touch them again , to feel them..she would be crazy for it..

Sunblast

Red BEFORE the "The Dreadful Dawn".

Orange AFTER "The Dreadful Dawn" and BEFORE the events of the comic and The "Heedeous Heart"

Yellow AFTER "The Dreadful Dawn" and the events of "The Heedeous Heart" and the little comic

even if you where his S/O he would mock of you and of them..

listen he knows you are his S/O but he just..feels like its the right thing or it doesn't matters

he doesn't even minds as i can think

he is just like "oh i am just joking! geez.."

Now under Penumbra's uhm..how do i say it?..NOW WITH PENUMBRA LMAO

he realized that he may have been a bit too much harsh with you..

he persuades Penumbra to localize you or visit you to apologize

if things go well..you both could try again!

and he is better.

He even tries to make you be friends with Penumbra! like he did with her

He still makes jokes but he thinks about them for a long time like

"no..that would hurt their feelings..NO ITS BAD..well- no wait..no..oh...this one may be good.."

he fears of you getting like the other ones..he tries to protect you at all cost

if you do get under Miss heed's..thing

he would be like mad but that multiplicate it for 10 and then for 100

the only thing that keeps him away from hurting heed and all her followers its his current little size and Curie

when you aren't under heeds control he makes sure you and your ears are okay..

he asks everyday if you are 100% SURE IF YOU ARE OKAY

after the Miss heed thing he is worried more than he should be but like c'mon

leave the little guy alone :(

he lost 2 of his most special people in his life just because a pink bitch

#Missheed x reader #villanous x reader #dementia x reader #Penumbra x reader #black hat x reader #x reader #sunblast x reader #dr.flug x reader

[zalrb]

the dormant elena loathing i have from season 4 onward truly awakens with your steferine/stelena fic and really scratches that itch i didn't realise was still there lmao

LOL oh man, i remember watching tvd in real time and the elena hate that i had during season 4 was, i mean you see it in my vids at the time? i remember i did a vid to 'bleeding out' by imagine dragons and my friend LOVED the video and was like in my language there's an expression that means bleeding someone out and taking everything from them until they have nothing left and it REMINDS ME OF ELENA, lmao, like we had A LOT of anger and then retrospectively my irritation became about the writing and what Julie did to force DE in season 4, which is why i did the breakdown of how insidious the sire bond is.

but when i do my fics, it's super funny to play with elena and play with her canonical feelings because i get to make her intentionally messy and tease out the hypocrisies while also very much staying in line of how much she loves stefan where like my issue as well as something i actually end up enjoying at the same time with season 4 has been that elena never truly loses stefan

and i've always been like if she did, if he wasn't there at all, she would lose her fucking mind.

4x11 is my favourite argument between them because it's the one time in the show where it feels like she's lost him

so when i do fics like this especially this one where stefan is like in deep with katherine and in a weird head space because of it, it's basically elena realizing that she gave up the love of her life for a curiosity and how she's handling that, which is NOT with grace, LOL.

#stelena

[boobsneezevids]

I just wanted to say in the bondage snz vid sneezing into the bonds so they got all messy was a stroke of absolute genius and VERY fucking hot

aw thank you! i'm super happy y'all are enjoying these videos so much lol

#asks

[bluesandboos]

HI JUST FOUND YOUR ACC THIS IS ME ASKING FOR DETAILS ON YOUR BA VACATIO DURING THE FINAL OMG

BESTIE I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE. THANK YOU FOR ASK ING IM ABOUT TO POP OFF

ALSO I WILL HAVE TO PUT THIS INTO TWO PARTS BECAUSE TUMBLR IS AN ASSHOLE

OKAY

OKAY

okay

sorry if this is too much rambling and has too many of my Own Personal Thoughts but writing this took me down memory lane and i am Emotional. also pardon any spelling/grammatical errors

let me put in a line break so i don't clog my approximately ten follower's feeds

so

a little unnecessary backstory that you can definitely skip: way back in march 2022, my family was all "hey we should go on a family trip in december because that's when we're all free, where should go" and my brother was like "argentina" (he has no football brain he just thought it would be an interesting place to go) and that was when a little seed was planted in my teeny brain. i knew that the wc had been rescheduled for december and i knew that argentina had been doing p well since the copa and would probably be favorites for the wc so i started skewing the plans to go towards argentina bc how dope would it be if we happened to be in argentina during the final? even if they didn't make it all the way, it would still be cool to be in a place where football means so much during the biggest game in the world. anyway, my scheming and manifesting paid off and we went to argentina! we flew out of (home country) on the day of the semi-final (i watched the arg vs croatia match while waiting to board) and then landed in buenos aires, was there for a day, then flew to iguazu falls for a couple of days.

we flew back to ba on the night of 12/17 and THAT'S WHEN THE PARTY STARTED

wait i think i can include some pics/vids i have to make this experience more immersive!

literally in the uber on the way to our airbnb, this was what greeted us at a stoplight at the obelisco:

also just a side note, just walking around ba the first day was crazy because my man dibu is just... there on adverts, flexing on bitches

and so many murals/adverts featuring mostly messi but also the rest of the tea,, and the JERSEYS my god. i don't have the dough to shell out for something authentic so i copped a ~very believable~ messi fake for like 3000 ARG pesos. i was so happy

ANYWAY the morning of 12/18 (i could hardly go to sleep i was nervous as fuck), i literally woke up to muchachos. like when i stood on the balcony of the Airbnb i could hear people just playing that song on BLAST. greatest alarm ever.

i had found out that the government (?) had set up screens all over the city so people could watch, so we decided to go to one that was set up in a park near paseo el rosedal, which ended up being ~1 hr walk from where we were staying. BUT it was SO WORTH IT because just walking through the streets was amazing. people were wearing jerseys, waving flags, cars were decorated and ugh. i was shitting bricks tho.

so we get to the park and im just gonna let my vids (fuck tumblr for only letting me upload one vid in a post) set the vibe:

(sorry some of them are super short; i make montages to remember vacations and short vids are ~aesthetic~)

HERE ARE THE VIDS FOR THE PENALTY AND REACTION TO LEO'S PENALTY. I HAVE NO WORDS AND WILL LET IT SPEAK FOR ITSELF. SORRY MY SCREAMING IS UGLY AS FUCK

i don't think i have the reaction to di maria's goal, i think i was just ~living in the moment~ but anon, lemme tell you, after going up 2-0, the vibes in that park were IMMACULATE. everyone was so freaking happy, and singing and ugh!! im getting emotional looking through the vids

more vibes (obvi lots of "muchachos" singing, but this song was one i hadn't known (disclaimer: i am very obviously not argentine. nor do i speak/understand spanish))

and obligatory muchachos:

and THEN MBAPPE DECIDED TO RUIN IT (okay, i actually don't really mind mbappe as a player but on this day he was my actual enemy. i hated his ass. it took me weeks to get over it). decides to tie up the game 2-2 as if he didn't win the world cup four years prior (selfish as fuck smh) and SHIT WAS SO FUCKING TENSE. my hands and legs were SHAKING. im literally getting nervous thinking about it.

and then leo. KING LEO. SCORED TO MAKE IT 3-2

i remember there was confusion for a bit because they were deciding if it was offsides or not and i was looking wildly around my family asking "did he get it?" because i was confused as to whether he actually got into the net (it was getting super hard to see with the glare of the sun and the dust and smoke and everything).

and then the goal stood. and i immediately burst into tears. i don't really know why (actually i do, it's because when it came down to it, leo put the team on his back and saved their asses AGAIN. he saw lautaro send it directly into lloris and said "fine, i'll do it myself" thanos-style and put the fucking ball directly into the back of the net. in the dark times, my hero came back and saved us. it was too much for me)

also literally imagine being varane and your ass being too fat be the reason your country gives up a goal in the wc final. couldn't be me.

obvi i don't have the immediate reaction to leo's goal because i was too busy screaming crying throwing up, but here's some aftermath (which is also emotional with the whole never-really-being-respected-on-the-international-level-and-his-kids-asking-him-why-do-they-kill-him-in-the-streets and now they're literally bowing down to him)

just more vibes:

i don't have any reaction to mbappe's penalty to make it 3-3, probably because i had shit my pants or something. also by the end of extra time i think i was full on having a breakdown. i don't even remember seeing dibu's save against kolo mani; i only heard about it and saw videos afterwards (honestly a good thing because i probably would've blacked out if i saw/registered it in the moment)

OKAY so then the game goes to penalties. i think i had started to feel a bit more confident at that point because i knew Our Lord And Savior Dibu Martinez would be the one to bring it home.

unfortunately i don't have any videos of when dibu saved any of the penalties/tchouameni missed because i could barely watch. i literally had my head in my hands and was trying to not to have a panic attack and was only relying on the noises around me to figure out whether a penalty was missed/scored. have you seen the clips of rodrigo de paul pacing the sideline, hoodie zipped up during the shootout? yeah that was basically me. but i think you can imagine how the crowd was whenever france missed/arg scored

i do have the best video tho. SOMOS TODOS MONTIEL

and here is just the aftermath that i managed to capture because i had, once again, promptly burst into tears. like many others, because Argentina had become Campeon del Mundo

(sorry not sorry if you don't care about the visual aspect lmao. i ain't ever deleting these vids and am obligated to rub them in people's faces)

OKAY BESTIE THIS IS WHERE I WILL HAVE TO END PART 1 BECAUSE TUMBLR IS PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF AND WON'T LET ME ADD MORE VIDEOS i will see u in part 2 if you're still interested :)

#mailtime #about me #argentina vs france #world cup #world cup 2022 #lionel messi #la scaloneta #argentina

[bisluthq]

Re: Holivia break-up. I’m ashamed about how long this might be 🫣

I don’t think her kids were meant to be a hail mary. I think she just took them or even went so it didn’t look like she was completely exiled after they broke up. There’s also a picture of some kids running around earlier while he rehearses.

I do think the Nanny affected their relationship more than DWD ever could and I mostly think it’s because it was now all out there and not a private matter. I don’t necessarily think he found out anything new about her and/or her situation with Jason. Harry is just not used to things being that messy and I think he could remove himself from DWD because it ended up being boiled down to a cat fight between the two women rather than 2 grown adults having an issue after working together. Nonetheless, I think a lot of this was also avoidable had Olivia just gone mute. I understand she’d never had this type of attention and it’s all negative but you are literally dating the king of just nod and smile, and you’ve clearly seen how it works for him so why not copy?

If none of this happened, I now see they probably still wouldn’t have worked. Moving to London just felt like a pipe dream. If it didn’t work for Halle Berry, it wouldn’t work for Olivia. Idk if Harry would have moved back to LA.

I think the thing I really wonder about is the Emrata situation. Most people seem to think that Deuxmoi pulled their information out of their ass but she really got it from a podcaster who is friends with Olivia’s friend/accquintance who posted the shady ig story about Emrata after the kiss. The podcaster doesn’t explicitly say who told him but they were hanging out before/after it happened. He basically says that they were on a break and Olivia knew she really couldn’t police his movement and didn’t really mind him sleeping around because “out of sight , out of mind” but that they were actively still in contact like even before he went out that night and like after and he never mentioned anything about it. The guy also says that Emrata and Olivia hung out when they were in the same place (+ Em started hanging out with her yummy mummy nyc crew) and like Em did the whole “fuck him; you’re better than that” routine only to go and do that. The guy did say Em half-assed apologised like sorry that hurt you and he says that Em told Olivia that she thought she was more sexually open/fluid so wouldn’t mind at all. He did say that was her last straw though (to me, basically confirmed to her that their feelings were probably just not the same). I don’t know how true all of this is but I know it did hurt her because she was MIA for a week after the vid dropped.

Note: Emrata did address the situation and she brought up Adam Levine but people read it so wrong. I think on the surface it looks like she’s saying don’t pit women against each other but the reading it with the Adam name drop basically said “why are you not attacking the man too?” since Sumner got most of the lashings.

tbf I don’t think anyone is used to anything being that messy. That’s sorta my point. I don’t think I’d stay with someone who has kids and an asshole baby daddy and people spilling all that shit even in like our social lives, not even to the whole world. Like I think I’d peace the fuck outta there. I also agree he didn’t necessarily learn a whole bunch of new info but it being so public just wasn’t cool. And I kinda think he did learn a bit of new info lol - at minimum he learned the nanny was overly invested in everything.

EmRata wasn’t a very good friend lol but I also feel like she didn’t do anything super wrong.

[justpinmeagainstawall]

gentle reminder that when I look at explicit posts/pics/vids of people on here - I’m thinking any or some of the following:

- omg where did they get that fit from 😲😍 I really want that skirt

- that makeup is fire I’ll never be replicating it but I’ll think about doing it all the time

- tits/bodies/asses/limbs can look like that? pretty 🤩😍

- corsets corsets corsets corsets corsets

- its so weird looking at a butt can just do it for a person I don’t understand

- how tf did you take that picture with that angle omg witchcraft y’all bitches are good at this… is someone in the room?? NO

- YOOO MY BOOBS/ASS LOOKS LIKE THAT I feel so seen 🥹🥹🥹

- bro please aren’t you uncomfortable? I’m so uncomfortable

- they’re gay they’re super gay omfg bless the lawd 🌈✨

- wtf is that angle oh God I hope they don’t break a neck

- is this what allosexuals are turned on by? Huh 🤔 I don’t get it

- wow they have pretty lips and eyes I wonder if they’re a good kisser - like do they give off the lots of tongue vibes? Sloppy kissing? Yeah its sloppy kissing probably very messy? Idk if I like that

- hmmm idk I’m annoyed now there’s so much nudity like okay we get it…..*likes the posts* anyway 😐

- ew new kink? Wtf 🥴

- rolls thicc cellulite stretch marks jiggles yes SERVEEEEEEEEEE YES MORE FAT PEOPLE

- damn I wish I was being ruined like that, you go bud I’m happy for you 😌

- oh fuck fuck this one feels too private look awaaaaaay 😬

- that colour looks sTUNNING on them 😫👏🏻

- i rarely see dicks on my da- PENIS!!!

- the lighting is excellent damn I see u

- I hope someone does this to me someday

- that looks like it hurts please the pic is not worth it how are you at all comfortable rn

- you know I thiiiiiink I can replicate that one I like it it looks doable

#i shall add to this list later #😭😂 yes welcome to the inside of my head its weird and messy #but yeah #tis me

[haikyuu-boys-headcanons]

𝙷𝙰𝙸𝙺𝚈𝚄𝚄 𝙱𝙾𝚈𝚂 - 𝚃𝚈𝙿𝙴𝚂 𝙾𝙵 𝙿𝙾𝚁𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈'𝙳 𝚆𝙰𝚃𝙲𝙷

hello everyone! yes this is a weird topic but i know we’re all just secretly wondering it so i’m gonna write about it. AND plus y’all this is super long, so the rest of the boys are just under the cut :)

ᴛᴡ:... ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴛʜɪɴɢ’ꜱ ꜱᴜᴘᴇʀ ɴꜱꜰᴡ ꜱᴏ ʏᴇᴀʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ’ꜱ ɪᴛ :)

𝙳𝙰𝙸𝙲𝙷𝙸 » pretty vanilla, might watch low-key classic kinky videos with the iconic fluffy handcuffs and velvet blindfold. secretly really into the daddy kink videos, but he’ll never admit that out loud

𝚂𝚄𝙶𝙰𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙰 » homemade videos are his go to. he hates all that fake, company generated bullshit (e.g; brazzers) he loves the rawness and passion of the homemade videos, videos where you can tell that the people involved love each other

𝙰𝚂𝙰𝙷𝙸 » boy probably has a panic attack every time he opens up pornhub. really into the sensual blowjob videos where there’s like a calming river sound in the background, no dirty talk. just a blowjob in nature :)

𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙰𝙺𝙰 » everything. there is nothing he hasn’t watched out of pure boredom. everything’s hot. lesbian threesome? check. mature adults pissing? check. it’s actually a little worrying how much he’s watched

𝙽𝙸𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙾𝚈𝙰 » anything with a uniform, please this boy’s so thirsty to see someone in a school girl uniform getting off. he probably gets in his old school uniform to enhance the whole experience

𝙺𝙰𝙶𝙴𝚈𝙰𝙼𝙰 » oh god, the ‘jerk off with me’ videos that are usually promoted in the porn ads. he probably has like 30 virus’s attacking his laptop while he’s jerking off to some chick jerking off on a loop

𝙷𝙸𝙽𝙰𝚃𝙰 » anything with tig ol biddies. probably the most likely out of all the boys to just search up ‘boobies’ on pornhub. his taste is just... tiddies? probably into the riding POVs where you can see the girl’s tiddies bounce

𝚃𝚂𝚄𝙺𝙸𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙼𝙰 » likes the ones where the girls get all twitchy and shaky before they cum, like the innocent masturbation ones with the weirdly realistic dildos. he imitates the pace they go at and everything + edging videos 

𝚈𝙰𝙼𝙰𝙶𝚄𝙲𝙷𝙸 » you know the casting couch videos? where the girl’s just sitting there, answering questions and she’s like super shy?? and then she starts stripping and probably ends up fucking the casting person??? yeah, tadashi’s super into that

𝙾𝙸𝙺𝙰𝚆𝙰 » the first time videos of like, anything. first time squirter? first time anal? first time having sex in general? he thinks it’s actually quite beautiful to see their raw reactions

𝙸𝚆𝙰𝚉𝚄𝙼𝙸 » twitter porn. do i really have to explain this one? the shit you’ll find on twitter is rawer and more realistic then any other porn you’ll find. probably follows thousands of those dom/sub accounts

𝙼𝙰𝚃𝚂𝚄𝙺𝙰𝚆𝙰 » anything with a girl getting destroyed by a huge cock. real cock or fake cock, doesn’t matter. anal or vaginal, doesn’t matter. hits even harder when it’s the girl’s first time, now that shit’s really hot to him

𝙷𝙰𝙽𝙰𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙸 » the risky public sex videos are his go to. like the ones where the guy/girl are in a public bathroom or something, and they have to cover their mouths so no one will hear them. he probably tried to recreate one of them and ended up getting arrested

𝙺𝚄𝙽𝙸𝙼𝙸 » JOI (jerk off instructions) vids turn him on the most. it truly breaks the 4th wall barrier and makes it feel more... intimate in a way. likes it even more when the girls masturbating while she’s instructing him

𝙺𝚈𝙾𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙸 » painals. this one’s just self explanatory, loves the way the girl just gets destroyed.

𝙺𝚄𝚁𝙾𝙾 » those fancy ass, 4K quality sensual videos with like top quality mics and 80 difference close up angles. probably pays for pornhub premium. also those office/business negotiations that turn sexual make him nut in like 0.4 seconds

𝙺𝙴𝙽𝙼𝙰 » the classic cam girl vids. he probably donates to heaps of cam girls, but he has his favorites. especially the live ones with the vibrator that works off donations. in one hand, his cock and in the other, his credit card

𝙻𝙴𝚅 »...i’m not even gonna lie, this boy is probably into the tacky fake ass company shit where the girl’s gorilla screaming over a finger in her ass. even the compilations with shitty music in the back turn him on.

𝙱𝙾𝙺𝚄𝚃𝙾 » gangbangs. there’s just so much going on, it’s so exciting !! it’s never boring + it’s messy. he really likes the fact that there’s just bodily fluids everywhere, covering everything and everyone

𝙰𝙺𝙰𝙰𝚂𝙷𝙸 » doesn’t even watch porn, he reads hardcore smut. probably reads porn with a plot because he’s classy like that, “her juicy core pulsated around his thick, juicy member” let’s all pray he never actually says that during sex 

𝙺𝙾𝙽𝙾𝙷𝙰 » watches those really mean videos with spitting and hardcore degrading. preferably, he chooses one couple to subscribe to and watch. it just makes it way more sensual!

𝚄𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙹𝙸𝙼𝙰 » probably doesn’t watch porn, who wants to bet he just stares at the ceiling and beats his meat? okay, but if he did watch porn, he’d just click any of the random ass videos on the recommended like the himbo he is

𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙳𝙾𝚄 » okay, y’all already knew this was coming. kinky ass mf watches anything, but mainly watersports and squirting. likes watching the ‘accidental’ squirting/watersports ones

𝚂𝙴𝙼𝙸 » the retro 70s/90s shit that was most definitely filmed on cassette tapes. he claims that they’re so passionate and raw, and something about how the purity of the older times being destroyed is... really hot

𝙶𝙾𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙺𝙸 » really loves the diversity and individuality of the dom/sub dynamic. watches plenty of couples that do homemade dom/sub shit. he probably also always subscribes to their sfw vlogging channel bc why not

𝚃𝙴𝚁𝚄𝚂𝙷𝙸𝙼𝙰 » i feel like this is really obvious but definitely the girl-on-girl shit. he probably watches the company lesbian shit with the horrible acting and again the gorilla screaming

𝚂𝙰𝚂𝚄𝙺𝙰 » shower sex? shower sex. for obvious reasons, it’s just much more sanitary and pleasurable to watch. no disgusting sweat, no cum stains on their clothes. it just gives him a headache thinking about how long it’ll take to get the stains out

𝙰𝚃𝚂𝚄𝙼𝚄 » just watches the iconic porn stars on repeat. abella danger, diamond jackson, lela star, ect... but seceretly, he loves movie sex scenes the most. like he would most definitely watch them on repeat. it’s just so much more realistic!

𝙾𝚂𝙰𝙼𝚄 » loves the ones with the nasty, heavy audio; clapping, dirty talk, squelching. the sound of two sweaty bodies humping each other gets him off so easily. oh and + food porn

𝚂𝚄𝙽𝙰 » cumshot compilations. any site, it doesn’t matter. especially when its on the girl’s back or just over her pussy, that shit’s hot HOT. he’s also subscribed to a certain someone’s only fans

 the end :p

#haikyuu hcs #haikyuu smut #haikyuu headcanons #suna x reader #tsukishima x reader #osamu x reader #sukusa x reader #astumu x reader #kenma x reader #kuroo x reader #kuroo smut #kenma smut #astumu smut #osamu smut #suna smut #sugawara x reader #ushijima x reader #tendou x reader #tendou smut #oikawa x reader #iwazumi x reader #mattsun x reader #oikawa smut #kageyama x reader

[its-me-im-coraline]

NSFW Alphabet // Ethan Torchio

words // 2383

warnings // smut, clearly its nsfw headcannons

pairing // Ethan Torchio x GN!Reader (might be mentions that seem like they are for f reamer but comeon theres lingerie for every body 👁️👄👁️)

author's note // if you want to be on the tag list let me know. an apology to the people on my tag list i think i accidentally have not been tagging you this whole time i am so so so sorry omg

request // yes, it was a reblog i cant find it right now

summary // self explanatory

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Regarding you, Ethan is the king of after care. As rough as he can be in bed, that’s just how sweet he can be once you're done with it. Goes full on dad mode (don’t know how else to explain this). He will have water, painkillers if you’re now in pain, a washcloth to clean you up, new clothes, and of course the cuddles.

“I’m alright, Ethan. I can do it on my own,” you say as Ethan walks to you with the wet cloth ready to clean the mess he made on your body.

“I know you can, amore. I just want to take care of you,” he says as he leaves a kiss on your lips.

I can also see him being the one to make a big fat breakfast the morning after, or at least get up early to pick something up.

Now I also feel that he is in need of some aftercare. It depends on the day really, if he’s had a pretty rough day and all I feel like he’d ask for some backrubs after. In this case he’d fall asleep so quickly like omg. But on the biggest part I see him feeling the need to reassure you that the things he said (i think we already established that this man would call you a slut) are not how he feels about you and will be asking if you feel the same.

“Do you love me?”

“Wha- of course I do, Ethan! Where is this coming from?”

“I don’t know… I guess - I guess I am worried that you don’t after what I said.”

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

When it comes to himself I feel like he really likes his chest and arms. Like I don’t know but I see him really getting off with you pretty much mastubating on his chest. Ya know what I mean? (i think you do you little sluts). He pretty much enjoys anything you do on his chest. I can imagine him looking at the mirror after you two had sex, seeing the cum on his chest along with the marks you have left and just smiling.

“What are you looking at, love?” You ask, seeing as the man is standing in front of the bathroom mirror from your spot on the hotel bed.

“Nothing, just the mess you made.”

“Mhm, and I bet you like it, huh?”

“You have no idea… Hey, are you sure you got tired? Cause I think I can do another round.”

As for his arms, as I said, he simply really enjoys that he can man handle you anytime, get you in any position he likes and feel you scratching them from the pleasure.

When it comes to you, Ethan is an ass guy. Say what you want but the man is an ass guy, end of discussion. He loves anything that involves your but. It does not explicitly have to be something like anal. He simply enjoys seeing your butt and holding it in his hand. It does not matter if it’s big or not, if it has stretch marks or whatever. Wear lingerie that he likes or that itty bitty teeny weeny bikini if you wear them or even some tight pants that make your butt just poìp and he can not contain himself.

I think I have said that to someone here (i think I had sent an ask to zodi @ icouldbeyourputtet) before but I feel like this man is very into spanking, like not even the rough malicious way. but this very wholesome chill way.

You had been talking about it all day, not having had a minute alone with each other for days, you could only dream what you could do that night after everyone left.

A playlist was playing in the background and a cigarette was burning on the ashtray next to your legs, you assuming a similar position, as said cigarette, bent over Ethan’s lap as he caressed your ass cheeks and back, playing around with the lingerie set he had gifted you a while back. (Did I just go to search my fave porn vid, lol exposing myself, and get disappointed because I can’t find it and translate it into fanfiction? yes yes i did, so bare with what i can remember)

“It’s okay, baby, you can take a little more, come on,” he praised, leaving a spank and yet another soft rub on the very red cheek.

He continued, going with the music, a very nice pattern, not very rough spanks but just enough to cause pain, pleasure and redness all over. Accidentally the man landed a few very rough ones causing a gasp and a series of giggles as you practically fell off his lap.

“Ethan, what the hell?” You laughed getting up from the floor and this time sitting on the man’s lap, sharing kisses with him.

“What,” he copied your action and laughed, “it was not intentional. I got carried away by how nice your butt is.”

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He is and is not messy. He will not want the cum to be in every surface possible you know, he will be careful but at the same time this man just loves to see his cum on you, whether it’s your back or your stomach, or in you if you’re ok with it. I bet he has a teeny weeny breeding kink but not necessarily because of the idea of breeding you but rather because he looooves seeing his cum run out of you… I'm not sure if this falls in the breeding kink category but alright

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He likes to fuck you while watching porn.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I feel like he is pretty experienced. From what they band has said in interviews and stuff, he seems to be getting some pretty often (no one, NO ONE, is surprised at that). He is not acting arrogant tho (not unless that’s the dynamic of the night), he is willing to learn what works for you and you specifically

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

As I said this man is an ass guy so I’d say anything that involves having the view of your ass. Humor me but i think he’d really like 69 with a female/afab partner (don’t know if this works very well with two dick-baring people lol). It has it all, eating you out,

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I think it can be both with him. He will not exactly try to make jokes but if something like the previously mentioned spanking incident happens it’s def welcome.

Now as a general rule I see him being pretty serious. I will be honest, I’m getting brat tamer vibes from this man so it’s all pretty serious when you really get into it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Considering he’s an Italian man and if you look at a lot of photos of him he def fit the ‘mediterenean’ man type. I see him just barely grooming. I don’t see him really shaving or whatever but he also wouldn’t want you to choke on pupic hair, he much rathers you choke on his dick

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

It all depends, really. He can be quite intimate with you but it all depends on the moment. There are different occasions for everything. For example, and this is a paradox that I hope I’m explaining well enough to understand, he is not very rough (will not be very aggressive and stuff, like to the extreme those tik tok boys want to pretend they are with their * growling * ew) but he will be rough. intimidating looks, spanking just enough to make you feel pain and redden up your ass cheeks. He’s like that mostly when you are being bratty.

Most of the times, like we’re talkin kind of lazy sex moments, it more wholesome ig, like very intimate and just comfortable and almost comforting. Ok, but like why do i see him having sex and having casual conversation (not the most common, i see this as like lazy day off, having nothing else to do and not being like super horny but being more like h o r n y … am i making sense?)

Setting the scene, you two are at home, both have a day off but it’s kind of raining so any of your plans are ruined. At this point it’s at around 10 am, not early, not late. You have missed each other and both have made it obvious but you are both in a very tired state so you opt for something not too much.

Plain and simple missionary is what goes around this time, Ethan on top just holding your legs around his waist,, going at a pretty medium pace.

“It’s a pity the weather is bad today,” says Ethan staring out the window.

“I know, we were going to go to the beach… I’m bummed about it,” you say, short of breath as the man continues his pace fucking you.

“Mhm, true. But this is better, amore, no? I’ve missed you so much,” he breaths out the last part, moans interrupting his words.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He does that pretty often, especially if you are not around to help. Sometimes it’s because of you that he needs to. I would def see him exchanging naked pics with you and at first he does that to tease you but he ends up teased when he sees a video you sent of you masturbating.

Bets that he’d be taking photos and vids of you fucking on occasion so he goes to these when he misses you on tour.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

As I mentioned previously I see Ethan to be a brat tamer. That I see to be the main kink that kind of works around everything else.

“Can you stop this, slut? It has gotten exhausting. I told you no noise but here you are,” he ordered, looking down at you trembling below his finger tips.

His face was quite stoic, voice never wavering from the strict and cold tone he tended to have when scolding you on the daily. Most times it was leaving a cup out of the sink but this time the scolding came from misbehaving. As if it was not enough that he was punishing you for being a brat and riling him up all morning, now you had to disobey orders. It was getting to him for sure.

“I’m sorry daddy,” you whisper, Ethan seeming satisfied with the response.

“Aw, why so tame puppy, now you decide to be nice?” His tone stayed the same, his words imitating a joke but the whole ordeal was not even close to it.

Now as for other kinks (did I open a site because I could not think? yes, shut up), as a result of being a brat tamer dom there are some few more kinks accompanying specifically that. He is def into bondage, both tying you up but also being tied up on occasion.

“Puppy, I have told you that is not a way to treat me. Untie me,” he says calmly, wrists tied on the headboard of the bed, eyes fixated to you.

“Well, why not? You do it all the time,” you whine, placed on all fours, facing Ethan as you lean towards him on your hands, “I want in on the fun.”

If only he was not tied… Ethan’s mind was already going places, figuring out exactly how he would punish you after you untie him -or after he escapes the restrains, whatever comes first. You knew that, very well - in all honestly that was the plan, that is always the plan.

“Amore, let me go. Let me go and your punishment will be tame,” he voiced looking at you, now positioned on top of his lap, touching yourself right then and there.

“I sense you want to be punished puppy, don't you?” You simply nod your head, eyes closed in pleasure.

“You see, the problem is you will not enjoy what I am thinking.”

“Mhmn.”

“Well, get yourself off now that you can, cause after I get my hands on you… You’re not getting to cum for days, amore.”

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Honestly, anywhere. I can see him having a preference to the luxury of either of your houses or a hotel room but if you push his buttons just right, some restaurant’s bathroom it is.

why can i imagine him having sex at a weeding venue’s bathroom….. omg…..

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Honestly, both. I feel like he would be extremely good at giving it, but would never opposed to receiving

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s ok with them but he doesn’t love them, ya know?

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.

Is surely try to do new things but it will always depends on what it is.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Come on. This goes without saying. He is a drummer for a living. He can surely go on for long…

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I def feel like he has a fair amount of toys. Some for himself, some for you… He looooves using them to punish you.

(small mention to my last fic little puppet)

“Beautiful, puppy! You have been doing so good for us, taking your punishment so well, but we are not done yet.” A buzz sound is what concerned the girl, eyes widening at the toy.

It was a small remote virator, imitating sucking on the clit. The drummer placed the girl over his knees, stuffing the toy between his leg and her clit, shocking the sensitive bud. “I think you can take a few more spanks,” said the man, landing one at the expanse of her thigh, the skin giggling at the contact.

“Damiano, count,” ordered the assertive man, seeing his friend kneel in front of Y/N, kissing her and then doing as he was told.

“I think we were left on twenty-three. Twenty four,” he began, counting all the way to forty before the ordeal was over.

The whole time Y/N was shaking, just about to fall off the edge, asking for permission to cum but her wishes were not granted just yet. She was exhausted, overstimulated, frustrated, and now unable to move on her own. But, oh man did she need more. The two men were more than willing to assist her.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

A ton! It’s his specialty. Maybe one of his most common punishments is edging and teasing. He can drag it on for days

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He is not very loud but is surely encouraging you to be.

tag list: @bieberhoodforever @tabi-toast @ginny-lily @moriro-da-regina @the-killer-queenie @makapaka11 @teenyweenynightghost

#maneskin imagine #maneskin fanfiction #maneskin #måneskin x reader #måneskin imagine #måneskin fanfic #måneskin #ethan torchio imagine #ethan torchio

[diakamu]

Dragalia Lost’s Main Artist is Promoting NFTs

Saito Naoki the illustrator youtuber is now basically recommending  NFTs to japanese artists (altho he would deny that he is) its so rly surreally bad im embarrassed and saddened to see him using such manipulative logics to justify NFTs and basically hurray to toxic capitalism

In his Youtube video, where he has 750000 followers (note; in Japan, ppl don’t usually subscribe a channel so this is a really impressive number) He did this pseudo “centrist“ “opinion“ rant where he describe “Pros and Cons“ of NFTs. As if.

If you’re interested, It’s the second latest video(as of now) with “600万円($60000)” on the thumbnail. There should be Eng sub.

In the vid, he literally said "NFTs are bad for the environment bc of the huge amount of electricity they use. BUT the smartphone that you use to criticize me uses electricity too! You could've put it down to save the earth lol. but i respect your position. SO you should respect mine!"

by far he's one of the most successful illustrators AND youtubers here AND he uses THAT super manipulative logic How ignorant. There tons of young artists, young like aged 11-19, those artists are watching his fucked up excuse as a rigid one. They are easily manipulated and they go like   "I like his art so his opinions must be rigid!" and then "EVEN IF YOU DISAGREE WITH HIM, BE RESPECTFUL AND DONT EVER EVER EVER JUDGE HIM. YOU ARE SO RUDE" ofc, ppl never hear ME instead because he is Saito Naoki and I'm not

NFT is already bad enough but him using such manipulative explanation to basically look down on anti-NFT ppl even before they appear by saying "I respect your opinion. Even tho you're not respecting mine Smiling face" that neo-liberal toxic-individual-accountablism? is beyond evil. States the "downsides" of NFTs and immediately represents the anti-NFT ppl as "rude angry mobs attacking him JUST BECAUSE they 'DISAGREE'" Almost feels like it's an NFT cult recruit video to be honest.

He was rly manipulative when he selectively avoided to mention anything about the ownership of each art, Like ppl never value the art itself over the popularity of the valid name tag of the artist who drew and posted it originally. and he said “Even I, Saito Naoki did it! so can you!” Like, no shit. You did it because you’re Saito Naoki, the famous Dragali, and Pokemon artist.

When he said “I shall be the successful example, so that fellow artists won’t give up in making money in this low paying environment” He could’ve literally call out the toxicity and begin some campaign for the real change so EVERY artist can make a decent amount of money. Instead he used that “positive role model” excuse to justify joining NFTs.

He is a  disgusting devil.

I loved his artwork btw

And probably will.

But please do note these;

1. Being critical and demanding a real conversation isn’t mean or rude.

2. Artists aren’t good people just because their artworks are good. Their art don’t necessarily represent their opinion, or their rightness. Their words do.

Sorry for my messy english but thank you for reading this far.

#NFTs #anti-nft #naoki saito #Dragalia Lost #pokemon

[moxfirefly]

B D J O V for Donnie, Karl and Alcina? (yes I am in love, no I dont have regrets uwu)

My 3 loves? Well why not! And pls enjoy the ficlet styles I’m going to opt for when doing dirty secrets! This is a little long so is going under the cut.

🩸🍷Alcina Dimitrescu🩸🍷

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)

A bit of an odd one here but she loves backs, like your actual back. The line of your spine, if you have those back dimples, ufff. She loves the shape of it if you’re on the more curvier side, she loves the skin, and your rolls, and any stretch marks. Just picture that elegant hand of hers ghosting over your back, nails maybe even claws.

On herself, well Alcina is aware of her assets and she’s very aware of her chest, both she’s quite proud of but she’s really proud of her figure over all.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

There was a pretty seamstress in the village who always was brought up to the castle to help with her dresses. She was a pretty thing in Alcina’s eyes, very much her type. When your making or fixing or measuring a tailor made outfit for a 9ft+ woman well it gets tricky and a little more handsy than usual. Alcina didn’t mind, the seamstress didn’t either. It was interesting following simple commands even if they were asked upon her with nothing but grace and poise.

So as Alcina sat for the 40th time to have something around her neck marked to be fixed, she had to stand between her legs to best approach and see the mistake. Only sitting did she have the best chance at seeing her at a more eye to eye level (well as best as it could be).

She isn’t dumb, she knows curiosity, want and lust like the back of her hand. Sees the nervous swallow of the seamstress whenever hands glide across her chest. The whispered ‘pardon my lady’ when she rests a palm on Alcina’s throat and takes a needle to the neckline with all the gentleness she can muster. Of course it’s the moment to prick her finger, the quiet hiss and scent is enough to alert Alcina and without waiting for her to fuss she takes that bleeding digit and kisses it, tastes the bead of blood, all while looking straight at her. When she still sees lust there, oh does she pull her closer.

One of her maids walks in about twenty minutes later, an array of materials in her arms so she doesn’t quite catch how the Lady of the castle smooths her dress and tries not to laugh, chest heaving a little and legs closing a tad. The maid greets her with her usual honorifics before leaving the requested materials, she notices the seamstress isn’t there and arches a brow at the room. “Lavatory” is all Alcina says before the maid makes a question. She nods but feels something isn’t right with the current picture but still leaves.

Once gone.

The seamstress crawls out from under Alcina’s skirt, mouth shiny, hair disheveled and nice set of teeth marks at her bosom.

It becomes a frequent thing after that.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

It’s not to say she needs to because she sincerely feels she has anybody at her beck and call who is willing ready and able. But on the rare occasion she indulges in some self care, it’s mostly in her luxurious tub. Feeling the warm water, her hair clean and smelling of that weeks chosen fragrance, well it gets her thinking and thinking leads desiring and if there isn’t anybody she’ll handle it. Slow, she loves drawing out her own pleasure, loves to feel that rise but stops before it’s too close. She’ll do that, edge herself a little bit more before biting down on her lip to muffle a more particular louder cry.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Both. She lives for giving it and she loves to receive it. She is just, wow, so incredibly good at it, she’s goes about it in such erotic and passionate way and if you’re not looking like you are being possessed by the devil then she up’s her game to make sure that happens. You can squeeze her head with your thighs all you want, she’s built different lol she can handle it. Don’t yank to much on her hair though, claw at her all you want but easy on the do.

She’s had a few inexperienced lovers which she has to guide when they want to go down on her. She’s very particular of what and how she likes it, but she’s patient enough to teach you.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

I’ll do you one better, https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRSKhUoh/

⚙️Heisenberg⚙️

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)

https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063110466158592/i-wonder-wonder-who-ill-pick-hesi-baby-a

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) shout out to @imthegreenfairy88 for helping me out with this one.

The first few times he indulged in this he was very adamant in keeping it to himself and to himself only (with time and reassurance he chills out) but the first time he tried doing ‘back door’ stuff on himself he was very surprised about how good it fucking felt and every so often he indulged in it. There’s an occasion where he ends up in bed with some tourist, gun to his head he doesn’t remember their name but he sure fucking remember the blow job and fingering combo that they gave him that had him seeing fucking stars. He tensed up at first was about to say something but they crooked their fingers just right and swallowed his cock at the same time and words were out the window along with thoughts.

He was so far gone that it didn’t cross his mind that when he begged for another finger, he gave himself away and if their eyes weren’t indication of how delighted they had been, feeling two more additional fingers really proved the point.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

I mean I’m saying yea, he has to get creative with it sometimes so as to not get bored, but he picks up a few things he enjoys (he is creative after all) he’s definitely ruined his fair share of pillows, loves rutting into them. He has beat off probably in any section of the factory but shower is better for clean up. He for sure has done it outside of the factory, probably relaxing on a chair and if the weather is nice enough, it’s not like anybody is gonna suddenly drop by. He likes a tight closed fist when he’s close but enjoys a teasing touch to start things off, really enjoys grabbing his balls when he does it. Very messy messy boy when he cums.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

This man blows you like his life depends on it. VERY sloppy but it’s really hot, it’s how eager he is about it and how willing he is to suffocate and or choke on it. He’s told you to sit on his face multiple times at multiple moments of the day. He loves the taste of you, loves feeling suffocated by your thighs. You know what they about big noses too 🥴🥴

As for receiving he likes to dish out what he takes. So expect some rough mouth fucking, he will make you gag, he will make you all teary eyed cause he enjoys it. He’s fine with it without to be honest, he much prefers to be balls deep in you but if you enjoy doing it then expect hip thrusting.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Not super loud, but he isn’t mute. He groans and moans but he’s also a talker so expect a lot dirty talk. His voice drops in a way when he’s fucking you that it makes your toes curl. He’s all breathy pants when he’s close. Lots and lots of cuss words.

👾Donnie💜

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and on the other)

https://hagelpaimon.tumblr.com/post/661063462078889985/b-body-part-their-favourite-body-part-of-theirs

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He likes the taste of his own cum.

He denies it, really denies it, just says it’s his way of cleaning you up after a nice romp but he really has a way of proving the opposite. Donnie has ‘finished’ on you in every way shape or form. On your stomach, back, face etc you name and each time he has cleaned you up he’s either wiped it up and sucked on his fingers or he’s just full blown licked it off of you.

And there is something so disgustingly erotic about that you haven’t or don’t want to call him out on it. You’ve gone down on his multiple times and he very eager to kiss you after your done. One time you purposefully left some on your chin and lips to see if he’d clean it up first but nah, kissed the heck out of you. His favorite is cumin in you and then going down on you. The first time he did that, it was enough to make your toes curl till they cracked and just as you were about to say something he was yanking another orgasm from you. The combined taste of his and yours release? Fuck now that was his favorite.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Does it and does it often. He’s not prudish about it, it’s free oxytocin and for a guy who’s convinced he’s never gonna get a shot at being with somebody physically, might as well practice some self love.

Loves visual stimulation but he’s really into audio stimuli. Likes those audios where he feels he’s there with the person or the ones where they give instructions. Donnie is really into edging and if he’s got the time and privacy he can literally edge himself for a couple of hours. Has at times managed hands free orgasms. Has made cock sleeves or basically fleshlights (ah ingenuity), can have his moments where he’s super slow and teasing about it, light strokes and all that. Can also have moments where he basically fucks his fist to the point of making some pretty obscene wet noises. If listening to audios or watching videos he really loves trying to cum at the same time as the person in the vid or audio. Has a bottle of lotion right on the desk but that shit is so cluttered with stuff that nobody has picked up on it and honestly it’s kinda funny.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

GIVE GIVE GIVE.

Oh my lord is he OBSESSED with giving oral. It’s such a big turn on for him. He just loves how intimate it is, he loves how he’s giving you pleasure in such an intimate position. LOVES over stimulating with his mouth, loves feeling thighs trying to break his head, happy to die down the suffocated in his favorite place, loves feeling a hand at the back of his head and pushing him in further.

He’s not crazy about receiving cause he knows his size is a challenge but he’s not opposed to it, he much rather get a hand job from you.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Loud and not afraid about it. He enjoys the fuck out of it and is going to be vocal about it unless it’s adamant to be quiet because people are around. His churrs are really nice, deep but not as baritone as say Raph’s, but they feel and sound so good.

#tmnt bayverse #re8 village #donnie #heisenberg #alcina dimitrescu #lady d #lady dimitrescu #tmnt Donatello #Karl Heisenberg #lord heisenberg #tmnt Donnie #Donatello #ns*w alphabet #ask #dianounais

[morifinwes]

Lauraa I finished all the fics, apart from decay (currently reading that now) and I love it sm! Especially the lip gloss one lmao the whole thing was so hilarious to me XD but also like the concept of lwj wearing lipgloss is >>> -yibobibo

@yibobibo then i'm going to rec you some more!! the lip gloss one was !!!!! ajsksks yes!! lwj wearing lipgloss is just so!! good!!

modern

this one is the painful one i talked about:

visitations by var_abelasan (12K, wip, divorced wangxian, post divorce, most of this is angst, uhm lowkey don't but also do want wangxian to end up together, it's messy, the jiangs & lans are shitty, wwx was in prison (brief mentions of that but it's kind of a major plot point), mxy & xy are the little brothers he never wanted but wwx picked them up anyways)

"Wei Ying-" Lan Zhan says, stutters, "I'm sorry." 

And now Wei Wuxian sees it, the red rimming Lan Zhan's eyes, the rumpled edges of his blazer. There is an old, familiar urge for him to reach over, to hold Lan Zhan's hand and smooth his hair, to tell him that everything will be fine. 

"We're all a bit sorry about this, I think," he says instead, and finds that he means it. For Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji and everyone else in that Guanyin temple, the pain must be unbearably fresh, like skin just flayed open. But Wei Wuxian's chest had been cracked open a long time ago, his wounds licked and cauterized and sewn shut over five long years - Ever hurting, but a dull, constant ache, "It's really alright, Lan Zhan."

 

Five years after being accused of corporate espionage and losing everything, the Guanyin Scandal breaks open and Wei Wuxian finds a familiar face at his door.

please don't let me be misunderstood by sysrae (3K, partly deaf!wwx, lwj notices, nobody else does though, idk wwx is like made out of fucking steel or some shit)

Lan Wangji has known Wei Ying for a fortnight, the first time he sees him get hit by a car.

light by redkosmos (10K, blind!lwj, which causes angst, but they manage it, best friends to lovers, fluff, lwj being insecure and feeling like a burden, college au kind of? but it doesn't matter too much)

The realization slowly dawns on him.

He can never again see the brightness of Wei Ying's eyes, the way they crescent when he smiles, never again see the rich black of his hair, the mess of it in the early mornings, never again see the beautiful tan of his skin, the beauty of the scars and marks adorned on it, how he wears his clothes, how it hugs his frame beautifully, how he looks like he's adorably swimming in cloth when he wears Lan Zhan's, and-

(Lan Zhan loses his vision in a car accident and learns to cope with it.)

don't leave me by trippinonskies (19K, brief very brief mention of lwj cheating, he doesn't but wwx is afraid lwj is cheating on him or just wants to break up with him, (he doesn't), marriage proposal, lwj acting distant = wwx's insecurities show up, fluff, angst and comfort)

Lan Zhan! Where are you lost today?” Wei Wuxian finally asks, at the end of his patience.

Lan Zhan looks a little guilty as he looks at Wei Wuxian, “Sorry, just a lot of work to deal with.”

Lie.

If there is one thing Lan Zhan can’t do, it’s lying. Especially to Wei Wuxian. But he doesn’t question Lan Zhan. He just accepts the reply, too scared to know that he is right. Too scared to know the truth.

// or where Lan Zhan is too hung up in planning the perfect proposal and ends up accidently ignoring Wei Wuxian making the other think that he wants to break up //

want you closer by xiaobucephalus ((3K, HORSES, only in the background tho, but wwx is an equestrian vet, which is so fucking valid bro, the lans own horses, a sick bunny, lwj the bunny parent!, super cute, dark bay throughoutbred chenqing is honestly so valid)

“Thank you,” Lan Zhan said, breathing a sigh of relief.

“Don’t thank me, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying laughed again, his voice warming the chill of fear that had settled in his chest. “I’ve been looking for an excuse to get into your hutch for a while anyway.”

safe in your thoughts by anonymous (20K, it's a cherry magic au???? (i haven't watched it, but you have i think?), horny lwj but only for wwx (always for wwx))

Wei Wuxian learns three very important things on the night of his twenty-seventh birthday.

One, that Lan Wangji is ridiculously funny, which Wei Wuxian had known before but what Wei Wuxain hadn’t expected was Lan Wangji to be funny at his brother’s expense.

Two, that Wei Wuxian had finally gone mad, absolutely mental at the ripe age of twenty seven because nothing else would explain the third thing he had learnt.

Third, and the most unbelievable of the lot, that Lan Wangji wants to fuck him.

iura by yoo_im_finally_writing (1K, only added bcs op is right and wwx would've the cutest german accent, it's more fun if you understand german so hit me up if you want translations for the german sentences)

Wei Ying calls in the middle of the night to talk about German law, and Lan Zhan tries very hard not to fall asleep. Or at least, not to let Wei Ying notice he's falling asleep. (As best friends do.)

breathe in the air, the last of its kind by wereworm / @neverdoingmuch (27K, getting together, jealous!lwj, but also kind of supportive, brief mention of cheating bcs of miscommunication, no actual cheating tho, college au, lwj pov)

Following Wei Ying’s line of sight, Lan Wangji can barely prevent a smile from crossing his lips when he sees the short row of rabbit statuettes placed at the front of the display. Silver, with bright gems for eyes, they look elegant yet lively and animated.

“A-Yuan would love one of those,” Wei Ying murmurs, almost as if to himself.

Lan Wangji frowns; the rabbits, while cute, don’t seem like a suitable gift for Wei Ying’s A-Yuan.

...

It’s only when he glances back at the rabbits and notices what has been placed on display behind them, that the pieces fall into place. They’re engagement rings, there’s no doubt about it. Lan Wangji feels his heart sink – Wei Ying isn’t just dating A-Yuan, he wants to propose to him.

Or: the five times Lan Wangji thinks that A-Yuan is Wei Ying’s boyfriend and the one time he learns the truth.

paint smears on sunny days by snowshadowao3 / @angstsexual (53K, getting together, art teacher!wwx, single parent!lwj, they're rich if i remember right, wwx & lwj are both good with kids!!!, this is so good actually, fluff)

To say that he runs to his car would be incorrect, as he is a Lan, and running is both undignified and unnecessary unless in immediate danger. Nor does he slam his key into the ignition, or aggressively swerve around the cars on the freeway, or have a mild panic attack at the fact he is picking A-Yuan up late from school for the first time ever.

He comes close, though.

By the time he arrives, it’s 4:35PM, and he has imagined about fifty different worse-case scenarios. The door is partly open when he gets to it, a messy label of 104B—Art Room scrawled with chalk on a placard next to the faded wood. As he opens it fully, he expects to see a wailing, terrified child, or perhaps a scene of utter misery and betrayal.

What he finds is his son, hands covered in paint, being sung to by a beautiful, dark-haired stranger.

“Ducks live in the pond, yellow ducks, happy ducks!”

Lan Wangji stops in his tracks.

(Or: Falling in love with your son’s art teacher, in five parts)

no bunny compares by gusucloudbunny (4K, god this is cute, fluff)

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Wuxian cornered his friend one week before his birthday. “If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?”

Lan Wangji furrowed his brow at Wei Wuxian, not exactly sure how to answer that question in a truthful manner that didn’t involve confessing his undying love for his best friend.

Wei Wuxian is on a mission to get Lan Wangji the perfect gift for his birthday. What Wei Wuxian doesn't know is that the only thing Lan Wangji truly wants is him.

wei wuxian's week of realizing things by photojenny (12K, i have read this multiple times, i always forget what happens, idk why but my notes say it's good, the tags say drunkji makes an appearance and i'm always up for that)

"Lan Zhan, do you like Mianmian?" asked Wei Wuxian.

Lan Wangji blinked, and stared. It was not the first time Lan Wangji had questioned the perceptiveness of the boy he had a crush on. Wei Wuxian had been smart in the class they had taken together. Yet time and time again, Wei Wuxian had tested the old wisdom that there are no stupid questions.

---

Lan Wangji must figure out how to confess when Wei Wuxian is the most oblivious person he's ever met.

are you my wisdom tooth? because i'd like to take you out by yellowcarnations (1K, crack, fluff, lwj stop flirting with a stranger, even if he is your husband, drunkji but make it to max level)

Lan Zhan wakes up and he has no idea where he is.

There are bright lights and his jaw hurts, he doesn't who this man next to his bed is but oh he might be in love, maybe, probably, definitely.

–

based off that guy-forgets-who-his-wife-is-and-hits-on-her vid but its wangxian.

beep! goes his heart by wearing_tearing (3K, fluff, lwj is like "he, he likes me right? he likes me" and everyone is like "yes, yes he does")

“Wei Ying’s heart monitor,” Lan Wangji starts.

Wen Qing blinks at him. “Yes?”

“It beeps.”

“That’s… what they generally do, yes.”

“The beeps change,” Lan Wangji continues, “when others are around.”

*

Wei Ying’s heart only sings for Lan Wangji.

canon

obedient and bellicose by thunderwear (19K, lwj is cursed by the lan elders, they notice too late, fix-it fic kind of?, lqr being a good uncle and lxc is a good brother, wwx accidentally uses the curse but he doesn't know about it)

It took Lan Wangji a long time to realize he was cursed. Too long really, anyone else would have noticed so much sooner. The problem was, he liked following the rules.

Ella Enchanted AU that no one needed but I wanted.

hello my old heart, how have you been? by ravenditefairylights (10K, amnesia, fluff, wwx taking care of lwj, so much fluff and softness, angst too but not that much)

The issue is, Lan Wangji brings his thoughts back before they stray too far, that it is impossible for someone to be in his bed, unless Lan Wangji himself invited them. He has not. He would remember doing so, and besides, all his night clothes are still on and there is no headache to imply that he was inebriated last night. No, the situation is simple.

There is someone in Lan Wangji’s bed. It is impossible for anyone to be in Lan Wangji’s bed, and yet that doesn’t seem to have stopped the stranger.

or lan wangji wakes up, and wei ying is there. he doesn't understand how or why, and he can understand even less why his hallucination of wei ying is so insistent on bathing him, and braiding his hair, on holding him and fixing his clothes. why the hallucination of wei ying seems so happy to see him.

teach me the way by likeafox (58K, rogue cultivator!wwx, horny wangxian, lwj wants wwx to teach him how to be a good lover, ....wwx is a virgin, the porn is the plot, but there's less of it than i thought)

"I do not wish to leave my future spouse… dissatisfied with my intimate knowledge,” Lan Zhan says, very seriously. “I am hoping to find an instructor, to better prepare myself for such matters."

Wei Ying feels his mouth drop open. He's pretty sure the Second Jade of Lan just told him he's a virgin who wants to learn how to do sex good.

Rogue Cultivator Wei Wuxian is the stuff of local legends. Some of those legends are even true! The ones about his tremendous experience in bed, on the other hand, are not so true. Which becomes a problem when Lan Wangji, on the verge of an arranged marriage and worried he won’t know how to please his future spouse, enlists Wei Ying's help to teach him the art of love-making. Wei Ying's great at improvisation, though, and is pretty sure he's got this sex mentor thing under control. What could possibly go wrong

other aus

of god: my love unholy by tunnelodfawn (3K, tw blood / war, dark!lwj, god!wwx, kind of poetry)

Lan Zhan takes everything as a sign from his god. The blood staining his fingertips—a holy anointment. He sanctifies himself through blood. The strings of his guqin gleam red in the sun—a divine blessing. This is an instrument of destruction. A single note—a cry of power—and in this note the voice of his god unravels the earthly threads tethering man to earth.

The Yiling Patriarch blesses Lan Zhan with war. Wei Wuxian blesses Lan Zhan with agility. Wei Ying blesses Lan Zhan with love.

The base of the Yiling Patriarch’s shrine is the home of Lan Zhan’s knees. He worships. There is something of the blasphemous and the unholy in his prayers. He prays not for victory but for the sight of Wei Ying. Bless me with your presence, he begs.

Or, wherein, Lan Zhan bridges the gap between the mortal and the divine—the worshipper and the god—with blood.

the river and the sea by sasamelons / @sasamelons (7K, soulmate au, arranged marriage (wangxian with each other), they're both kind of dumb but i love it)

Lan Wangji gritted his teeth, wishing to just be left alone. "I am looking for my soulmate," he ground out.

"Oh."

It took Lan Wangji a few moments to realize that Wei Wuxian had stopped following him. When he looked back, the other boy seemed to be frozen to the spot, eyes wide and lips still parted. He quickly looked away when he saw Lan Wangji looking back. "I see. Well, have a good trip!"

--

At six years old, Lan Zhan met his soulmate on the streets of Yiling and promptly lost him again.

At sixteen years old, Lan Wangji met his betrothed and was determined not to like him.

#so...i realized i forgot to check the things i already listed but? i tried to avoid listing fics twice? #yes i've mostly been reading oneshots these past few weeks idk why but i can't seem to find any long fics #or at least not ones that i like #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #wangxian fics #mdzs #mdzs fic #cql fic #the untamed #aamna tag #we're almost through the rec list now? i have so much open but idk why i add so few #i'm just really picky when it comes to which ones to write down and which ones not #and then this became a kind of comfort list? #idk? #but also ANGST #not Angst but ANGST #fun fact: Angst means fear in german

[bootyful-seventeen]

NSFW A-Z

A = Aftercare:

Wonwoo's aftercare would be pretty practical and efficient. He seems like he'd be prepared and have a couple extra water bottles beside his bed, and some baby wipes in the night stand drawer for messier nights. I don't think he'd be the type who'd talk too much but would be more affectionate then usual, and would even read to you if you asked him to.

B = Body Part:

With the way he's evolving now, I feel like he really likes his arms and hands. He love, love, love, love, loves spanking, choking and fingering you. And he's got some power in his spanks too from that one vid where the hip hip unit and Hoshi were spanking Chan.  His favorite body part of yours would be your shoulders. He loves grabbing onto your shoulders when he's fucking you doggy style, and would mark them up with hickies and bite marks while he talked dirty to you.

C = Cum:

I think Wonwoo would keep things pretty clean unless you've talked things over and you were both okay about things getting more messy in the sheets. It's only after you've spent some time coaxing him out of his shell that he'd really get to enjoy seeing you covered in his cum and admit it.

D = Dirty Secret:

He wants to fuck tiddies. He just really wants to see his cock sliding between your mounds and would probably get lightheaded from excitement when it finally happens. And don’t even get me started on how fucked up he’d get when he cums over a pair of tits cuz he’d start to stroke himself to hardness again so he could paint your chest with his cum again and watch it drip off your breasts.

E = Experience:

I feel like Wonwoo wouldn’t have much experience past fingering and maybe oral cuz I really feel like he’d only want to get that intimate if he really loved someone and even day dreamed about having a future with them. If he hasn’t thought about getting married to them then he most likely wouldn’t want to get intimate.

F = Favorite Position:

Wonwoo loves cowgirl so much its unbelievable. Not only does he get to have you on top, he also has the best view of your breasts bouncing in his face, and can suck on your nipples, kiss or mark up your chest while you rode him.

G = Goofy:

I don’t think Wonwoo would get goofy but he would get really cute. Like obnoxiously cute. He may pull the aegyo card a few times but that only happens when he’s been in a playful mood all day and you wanted to dom. So if you wanted him to beg, he’d pull the aegyo card to watch you either cringe or crumble at how cute he is before he hiding his face from embarrassment.

H = Hair:

Have you seen Wonwoo? He’s a hairy boi 100% and I feel like he’d want to keep himself either trimmed, shaved or slightly overgrown but not too much cuz hair will hold in all the smells until you take a shower. So if he’s got a partner who likes going down on him, he’ll be very uptight on washing or manscaping so his partner doesn’t gag on his scent and not his dick.

I = Intimacy:

Oh God, Wonwoo gets sentimental as fuck and is obsessed with super soft and lovey dovey sex. He adores saying all these sweet things to you just as much as he adores hearing you say the sweetest things to him. And he’s be the type who’d hold hands too because it really adds to the feeling and makes it so much sweeter and more intimate.

J = Jack Off:

He jacks off in a way that match his horny levels. Like if he’s going through a dry spell, he could easily go months without jacking off. But when his hormones are up, he just can’t stop touching himself. It’s almost like his hand is attached to his dick during the extreme horny season.

K = Kink:

Man has a glove kink and you can’t tell me otherwise. He loves the feeling of the different textures of gloves on his skin almost as much as he loves your reaction to the texture of the gloves skimming against your heated skin. From the soft velvet, to the smooth silk, to the cool leather. He loves all of his gloves.

L = Location:

Wonwoo seems like he’s a bit more traditional and would prefer the bedroom because it’s so comfortable and only have to walk like 3 feet to get to the bathroom and then crawl back into bed. But a close-ish second is the couch. It is more in the open but it can make playing video games a little bit more interesting if ya know what I mean.

M = Motivation:

Show him your tiddies lmfao. Wonwoo’s a sucker for the tiddies and can’t ever say no to them.

N = NO:

No branding, no extreme stretching, no public sex, no age recession kink, no bathroom kinks, and no foot fetishes. I feel like there’s a lot of things that Wonwoo wouldn’t be into so his no go list could get long.

O = Oral:

His oral game is so strong and he takes pride in how good he is at eating you out. He’s low key addicted to oral sex and loves to be on the receiving and giving ends of it. Wonwoo’s just really happy to please and has most likely thought of 69ing a few times from how much he loves oral.

P = Pace:

Definitely on the more slowed and relaxed side and loves to drag it out so he could keep kissing you and whispering dirty words and praises to you without getting out of breath. He really likes to feel your walls squeezing around him and begging him to fuck you faster. He adores it when you beg him to fuck you faster and will always cave when you beg.

Q = Quickies:

I feel like Wonwoo hates quickies and would rather spend a few hours or his whole day hiding a boner from other people if that meant he could have you all to himself at home.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc):

He's down to experiment as long as it's not something crazy and you'd both be safe.Also not really into public sex. He seems like he’s the type who would want to keep things between you in a more private and secure area.

S = Stamina:

I feel like he could go two rounds at a time but if he pushed it anymore then he might just fall asleep right then and there. Probably has pushed past his limit before and ended up falling asleep between your legs when he was in the middle of eating you out.

T = Toys:

He'd have a small stash of his favorite toys to use on you, and sometimes on himself. He’d a lover of dildos cuz of how simple they are but he does have his favorite vibrator on hand for either of you to use. 

U = Unfair:

I don’t think Wonwoo would be too unfair in bed but he will take the teasing and edging if you wanted to be unfair with him. He’d just wanna make you feel good, and feel good himself so he would only very, very, very rarely be unfair and make you go the extra mile for it.

V = Volume:

He's on the quieter side but he can get louder if he wants to be. The only time he'd get loud is when you're 100% alone together and know that no one will interrupt you or be able to hear you fucking like rabbits. Wonwoo would be more of a groaner then a moaner, but would let out little hybrids of the two when he's jerking off or being jerked off.

W = Wild Card:

Wonwoo's really into bdsm and loves having you tied up for him on the bed. He'd want to have you tied up in every position imaginable while he fucks you and sometimes he would take a few pictures of you if he really liked the way you looked and wanted to have a reminder of that moment instead of leaving it just as a memory.

X = X-Ray:

His dick would match his body pretty nicely, so he'd have some impressive length but would lack some girth but not a ton. But I sometimes also wonder if he’s hung like a horse and throws my original hypothesis out the window. Cuz that can happen nd I’m more then low key thinking of Wonwoo being like that I’ve seen it and holy fuck the guy’s dick was huge for a skinny guy

Y = Yearning:

I think that Wonwoo’s yearning comes in spurts, like he could go a pretty long time without getting his dick wet but when he’s getting a visit from the hormone monster... he’s gonna either have his hand in his pants or beg you to help him out. Even if he tried to hide how horny he was, you’d be able to tell from how long his showers suddenly got and from how long it would take for him to “fall sleep” at night.

Z = ZZZ...:

Let the kitten cuddle up and sleep 5-10 min after a rough night.Wonwoo would get adorably cuddly too so you’d end up falling asleep with his limbs wrapped around you.

#wonwoo imagine #wonwoo smut #kpop imagine #kpop smut #seventeen smut #seungcheol #s.coups #jeonghan #joshua #jun #hoshi #soonyoung #wonwoo #jihoon #woozi #dk #seokmin #mingyu #minghao #the8 #seungkwan #vernon #hansol #chan #dino

[piracytheorist]

The first notation says "ここからぼろ泣きします" (~aprox "here is when I really started crying") and the other > "she was crying again and I'm pretty sure she also said "I love you" - or tried to; Rose said "愛してるよ""

yeah she said "うちも愛してるよ" ("I love you too") but it got a bit understandably messy by the crying (me too Harumaki-san, me too ;_;)

"yt ALMOST got me, as the video was age restricted... but thanks to some vpn loopholes, I found a way to watch it!"

Age restriction? but you're 27? youtube wut. Is it bc of laws in Greece or something? I know there are vids that get country blocked.

About the languages, I can't remember what it said in Spanish at that point but I very much remember the Heisenberg naming his siblings "la zorra chupasangre, la muñeca psicópata y el p*to besugo" (the bloodsucking bitch, the psychopath doll, and the f*cking fish/idiot (it's a common fish, but it's also an insult like dumb/dimwit/idiot - lmao it gets across the 'moronic freak' 'Moreau-nic freak' thing ig)

-laa

the way I never got that "Moreau-nic freak" pun in the first place

WHY DOES IT HIT ME SO MUCH, TO REALIZE SHE DID SAY "I LOVE YOU TOO" AS A RESPONSE TO ROSE'S I LOVE YOU?? I had suspected it was that, and I was like YES WE LOVE ETHAN WINTERS 😭😭😭

Like legit one of the reasons I'd love to play as Rose in a future RE game is because we know she loves Ethan so much 🥺 and only because she knows what he did for her (like ik I talk a lot about the first time I watched that cutscene and how I wasn't that invested in Ethan then, but EVEN THEN I was touched by how she told him she loves him. My heart!). I feel like I'll immediately connect with her through that 😭

/

Yeah, there's this stupid thing I get into some videos where yt asks me to verify my age. Because I do happen to be 27, but yt wants proof. In what form, you ask? By asking me to show them a photo of my ID card or give them my credit card info. I have no single clue where that came from and why it exists. It's legit, it's not a scam, it's gοοgle itself asking me for that info. And I know there are multiple people who haven't done any of those yet they can still watch age-restricted videos. It's stupid and super annoying. Why does gοοgle want such private information just so I can watch gameplays of a horror game? Certain ones, specifically, because most are not age restricted! I don't know what they're smoking in gοοgle, but it's crap.

I tried using a vpn to pass through it, but I was still blocked out, so I'm pretty sure it's not because of the laws here (though I have found videos that are blocked in my country, specifically, the videos with the soundtrack from Outlander are blocked here for some stupid reason, and I can watch them with a vpn enabled). The vpn I have has an autopilot mode, which I guess makes me appear... nowhere, I guess. Like, normally, without the vpn on, my yt logo looks like this:

And if I put it on some of the few places it offers for free, I get the respective logo change:

But if I put it on autopilot...

I belong nowhere. yt doesn't know what to do with me, and it allows me to watch age restricted videos. Perhaps it thinks I'm on a Space Station and so I'm a legal adult so I am allowed to watch what I want. Idk. Really fucked up that they ask me ID or credit card info to allow me to watch "adult stuff", if you ask me, but that's how capitalism and megacorporations work.

//

And back to RE stuff, I don't know how "canon" the dubs are considered (I mean, the ones the game itself offers are official, but still), but I like looking around for any differences even in like, small things. Like in the Four Lords scene, when Ethan looks at his restrained hands and says "Don't I get a say in this?", in Italian, Spanish and I think Portuguese, he says "Isn't my opinion important?" and I may not be an official translator myself, but I do kinda wanna make unofficial Greek subs for the game (if I ever figure out how to change the game files), and in Greek I would translate that into (almost literal, because our way of putting accent on the "me" would be to kind of repeat the word at the beginning of the sentence) "Aren't you gonna ask me?" because that's how I feel someone would say that in Greek, like, a literal translation of "Don't I get a say in this" could work but it would sound a bit archaic and even too formal for the situation. In any case, with the dubs and what little I understand from them, it feels like I'm watching the same thing but from another perspective. I wish I could understand the Japanese version, I feel like it's probably the closest to what the writers intended.

#long post #nette speaks #Resident Evil #long asks anon #anonymous #ask and ye shall receive

[starryevermore]

the case of the karate killer: the prologue (0) ✧ sam and colby

the case of the karate killer ✧ a detective snc au | ao3

request: I was watching Colbys vid and immediately after watched Murder by Numbers and then took a nap🤦, i had a dream that Colby was some detective who was obssesed with solving crimes to the point that it would take over his life. Sam was his partner who kept encouraging him to take breaks and eventually was made to take over a case because the bosses werent too happy with Colbys actions, and Jake was some weird type of karate/parkour criminal being sent out to commit such crimes...it was crazy, seemed super real, and it all happened in the span of 40min that i took for a nap....Now i cant get it out of my head and wanted to know if there is anyway you can make it into a fic series because i have never seen a fic like that.🙏🏻😣

summary: jake webber is a force to be reckoned with. 

word count: 1,004

warning(s): description of a murder, jake is not a good guy™

If there is one thing you must know, it’s that Jake Webber was not someone to be messed with. Not that anyone knew that. He stayed in the shadows, away from others. He wasn’t someone you saw when you walked into the room. He wasn’t someone you saw, ever. And he liked it that way. He liked his solitude. He liked being an enigma. He wasn’t someone you could figure out, someone you could pin a label down on. He was Jake Webber, a man who was everything and nothing all at the same time. 

And, being the way he was, was exactly how he got away with everything that he did. 

In his line of work, the less seen you were, the better. He could not afford witnesses. He could not afford people recognizing him. He was to be a fly on the wall. Never seen, but always there. You were to never know when he was to strike. That is, until it was already too late. When it was too late to fight back, too late to strike him. No one ever stood a chance. 

Not even the man twice his age, twice his strength. 

Jake Webber was a force to be reckoned with, even if no one knew his full capabilities.

And Landon Montgomery knew that firsthand. He knew it, and all of the victims who came before him knew it. Landon Montgomery was not a good man—none of the victims ever were. But Landon was the worst of the worst. He was nothing but a cheater. He cut corners, burned bridges, and let ruin everywhere in his wake. That wasn’t the reason he had to be taken out. Jake, and his bosses, didn’t give a shit about any of that. Everyone fucking sucked, and Jake couldn’t take out every bad man on the planet. But Landon Montgomery’s crime was messing with the wrong people, and that was something that Jake could (and would) take care of.

It wasn’t particularly hard to do it. 

People like Landon Montgomery were messy. They weren’t paranoid like Jake was. They didn’t change their routines. They didn’t change their routes. They were stagnant. They had one-track minds. They didn’t think outside of the box. They were painfully unaware that their routines made them easy targets. That is, they were unaware a threat stared them dead in the face and their life was on the line. 

No one ever saw him coming. And that’s one of the things that made him the best assassin this side of the Mississippi had ever seen. That, and his perfectly honed skills and complete separation from any semblance of emotions, made him a killing machine. He came and left without a trace, leaving behind nothing that could tie him to the murder. 

And, in a way, he got a sick, twisted, sort of enjoyment out of all of this. He loved the theatrics of it all. Even if no one could ever know what he did, he took great pride in putting on a good show. He was the director, producer, and screenwriter. And he only had one shot to get the perfect take. 

And, with Landon Montgomery gagged and bound to a chair in that old abandoned apartment building on the corner of 16th Street and Rosewood Boulevard, Jake took no greater pleasure than ensuring his demise. If Jake was controlling the show, then Landon was the marionette puppet being strung along the stage. Not in control of his movements, being subjected to whatever grand torture the puppeteer designed with no way of stopping it. Jake loved to see it. It’s what the bastard deserved, after all. When you bite the hand that feeds you…Well, don’t be surprised when the hand strikes back. 

“Do you know why I’m doing this?” Jake asked, pulling the gag out of Landon’s mouth. 

He always asked that. It was his favorite thing to say during these things. If Jake Webber were to have a pattern, it was that question. It was purely for his own enjoyment. No one besides him and his victim would ever know what was said. But there was something about the blubbering, the begging, the bawling, that brought him such a sick satisfaction. 

“Because I-I—”

“Because you-you,” Jake mocked. “Because you’re an ungrateful bastard? Think you’re some hotshot? Think you can make it all on your own in this fucked up world? Nah, you’re too soft. Too naïve. You thought you could get away with shit?” He yanked on Landon’s hair, pulling his head back and then he leaned in close. “Well, you got another thing comin’ for ya, buddy boy.”    

He cut the ties holding Landon to the chair.

“But, just for fun, I’ll give you a chance to run.”

Landon stared.

“Three…two…” 

Landon, realizing Jake was serious, jumped and took off running. He was trying to get out of the apartment, out of the building, away from this shitshow. He needed to get away. He needed to get away. He needed to get away. He needed to get away. But—that simply wasn’t in the cards. 

Jake made it to the door faster than Landon could blink, catapulting over the furniture before flipping over Landon and sticking the landing right before Landon could touch the doorknob. He flashed a wicked grin, before striking and landing a punch on Landon’s nose with a sickening crack. 

“What? You think you could get away that easily?” Jake laughed. “I may be young, but I ain’t stupid.” 

That was the last time anyone ever saw Landon Montgomery alive. Jake worked fast, incapacitating the much larger man quicker than a cowboy could wrangle a herd of cattle. The man’s tortured screams becoming the perfect symphony to his show. And, with his blood painting the walls of the apartment and his body chopped into six pieces, the show came to a truly delightful close. 

And, as the final encore, Jake took Landon’s glittering silver ring with him. 

#the case of the karate killer: a detective snc au #sam and colby #sam golbach #colby brock #snc #xplr #traphouse #traphouse 2.0 #trap house #trap house 2.0 #sam and colby fanfic #sam and colby fic #sam and colby fan fic #sam and colby fan fiction #sam golbach fic #sam golbach fanfic #sam golbach fan fiction #sam golbach fan fic #colby brock fic #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fan fiction #colby brock fan fic #jake webber #jake webber fic #jake webber fanfic #jake webber fan fic #jake webber fan fiction #*written by: me #starrybrock