it's time for my yearly chanukah merchandise ratings! how are there always so many to choose from. as always, this year is a doozy and I am as bitter as ever lmao
this was quite literally labeled "hanukkah cone tree." gee I wonder which winter holiday is The One With The Trees. surely it's the jewish one with all the fire. let's make it blue and white just in case. 4/10 there is no excuse for this
why are the chairs so far apart. why is there nobody there. why are there so many grapes. what even are those green things. why is there soup. will the mysteries never cease. 7/10 purely because it's pretty
I for one welcome our jewish alien cousins. not sure what this has to do with chanukah but I want to hear about jewish life on mars so 8/10 friends come in out of the cold and have a latke with me
the more I looked at this, the worse it got. there's a literal christmas tree and tinsel but oh it's got blue lights so it's fine. and as we all know, children regularly hold fully lit candle menorahs with mittens while going door to door during a snowstorm. I guess who are we to stifle a child's latent desire for arson. 5/10 somebody save that poor dying kitten
this poor magen dovid is being forcefully converted to christianity and we need to help it. quick somebody put this on a sufganiyot stack. 4/10 we all know the intended target audience isn't interfaith families okay
do I even have to say it. please just. just stop. get One (1) Jew to weigh on your hanukkah products, I beg you. -392928373/10 walmart owes me a personal apology for making me see this with my own two eyeballs
I spent a full five minutes staring at this shirt desperately trying to make it make sense. I shouldn't have bothered. it's worse than the hebrew could ever be. 2/10 amposzu zusach mezchamal to you too
congratulations, once again you wrote gibberish. this says nothing. it's not chanukah, it's not happy holidays, it's nothing. the letters on the dreidel are an ACRONYM people! there's an order! 3/10 it's antisemitic that this has over 4,000 sales (thank you @quartzfox for sending this to me. now you all have to see it too.)
now these are CUTE. and the dreidel letters are in the correct order too, which is unfortunately impressive. 10/10 no notes, it has cats, would wear
(previous years 1, 2, 3)
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Agora, a pergunta q nn quer calar: por que o Toby roubou o livro?
MEU DEUS eu achei que já tinha dito isso em algum lugar, mas dei uma procurada aqui e nada de achar o link disso pq eu NUNCA EXPLIQUEI DJKSKJDSKJDS MALZ bora lá
My bud here asked a very important question: why Tobias stole a very sacred and important book?
The short answer is: because Tobias has a curse and he wanted to find a cure.
OMG HOW- calm down, first things first.
As I said before, when Alex and Elisa started to take their relationship more seriously, Alex would hang out in the Colony using a shrinking potion and preteding to be an imp. He was well accepted as one by Elisa's fellow imps and fairies and they never had many problems with his disguise.
But there was this one, powerful, envy fairy who took notice that something about Alex was... off.
She started to do her own investigations and ended up finding the truth out: Alex was no imp, but a human in disguise. Although, to her, this was actually very good news.
Why? Because this fairy - Irwalia - comes from a family that has been preaching an ancient propecy over a century now. Said prophecy omens that, one day, a being with the strongest of souls - a fairy soul - and the strongest of bodies - a human body - would be born to free the Colony from it's decades of war.
There are a lot of fairy families that preach this prophecy till this day, but all of them are taken as delusionals by most of the Colony's inhabitants. It's impossible to have a being that has a different soul from it's body, it just can't happen. But they hold onto their beliefs firmly regardless.
When Irwalia learned the truth about Alex, she couldn't help but be ecstatic: she had finally found a human inside the Colony's walls. And, if SHE was the one who discovered him first, then she must be the one meant to give birth to this prophetic child… right?
In a vengeful and spiteful spirit, Irwalia decided to not report Alex to the Colony's authorities, but instead take her anger out on what the human and his imp wife treasured the most: their only child.
Alex and Elisa didn't took long to find Toby, afterall she wanted to take her revenge in front of them...
Irwalia cursed Toby with something that not only breaked Alex's heart, but made the child defenseless if he ever encountered a human: if in close proximity to a human, Toby is completely unable to do any kind of magic.
This may not sound like a big deal, but imps, especially imp borrowers, take great advantage from their magic abilities to protect themselves from the sight of humans and their malicious intents. And, of course, Toby would never be able to obtain his full magic potential (which he has a lot of) around his own father.
Aside from all that, his hair is now bright blue, a side effect of the curse that makes it difficult for him to hide from humans and dangerous animals.
Toby grew up not being allowed to leave the Colony EVER because of his curse. So when he became an adult, after getting involved in a lot of trouble inside the Colony, being the little thief and vagabond that he is, he thought-
Unfortunately, he never had the chance to actually seek a cure for his curse in the book because he was discovered for his theft before that, yeah, it was all kind of pointless, he truly sucks at hiding.
Huh, I also wonder why it worked...
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finally got around to do some greaser au stuff! i have no idea how to dress characters, other than knowing that the gang all wear matching jackets... its a little silly, i think sally is the one i mostly have no idea on...
it'd be a funny idea if Frank still had a vest on, just because they may not be above physical altercations does not mean they can't dress to impress! bwhahaa!
(they do have a matching jacket, of course of course...)
barnaby... my beloved...
i have no idea if he has a motorcycle! it's a funny thought that he may have a big truck instead... in case anyone got tired! they can sleep in the back seat while they listen to music... and put their motorcycle in the back!
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royjamiekeeley take Phoebe to the glasgow willy wonka chocolate factory experience. Jamie was the one to book the tickets after seeing the online adverts, thinking it would be a fun surprise. After they arrive and the whole thing is such utter shit, Keeley pulls the ad up on her phone to "make sure this is it" and she and Roy see that basically every word is horrifyingly misspelt and the whole thing is complete AI gibberish. Keeley, gently, is all "oh, Jamie..." about it. Meanwhile Roy has stolen Phoebe's single designated jelly bean to lob it at Jamie's head. He also steals Jamie fourth-cup portion of lemonade. Someone recognizes Roy and Jamie and now the whole place is lined up to take pictures of their kids with the famous footballers, because at least that's something more worthy of their 35 pounds than the actual event. Between groups, Roy attempts to murder Jamie with his eyes for putting him through this torment, but he also can't say no to taking endless pictures and signing endless autographs because these are fucking kids. It's not their fault the event is rubbish and Roy's boyfriend is an idiot and put them there. Keeley is busy apologizing profusely to all the actors for her boyfriends' drawing attention away from their "really good, no seriously" performances. She also offers them advice on what to say to the press when they almost certainly come poking around.
Later, Phoebe tells her mother it was an incredible day. She got an absolutely mint picture with The Unknown and wants it framed.
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