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#so trying to focus on things has been a Time TM
theangrypomeranian · 1 year
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I promise I will be replying to messages and asks tonight after work, it's been a rough week for me lol
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chaoticspacefam · 1 year
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@vihola tagged me to make some OCs in >this< picrew so ofc I jumped on the opportunity!
Tagging (if you want to, up to you & no pressure if not!) @rainofaugustsith @mercurypilgrim @tearlessrain @darth-bagel @outcastcommander @messes-of-men and anyone else who wants to do this one! <3
Have one Saarai because, of course, she is my favourite hahah Also a Maiite!! because this one has vitiligo!! (honestly it has so many options, props to the OP of the picrew! <3) Maite’s a little more red than she should be (she’s more orange-y red really) and ideally her hair would have a more reddish undertone too buuuut everything else was lovely to be able to find options for her in a picrew for once! :D I gave Rai a cocktail and a nice jungle bg because honestly ya girl needs a vacation to a planet that has a nice jungle to remind her of home, she’s EARNED it lmao I had to think a bit for what to put Maite in bc I didn’t really want to cover up all her vitiligo but also I didn’t want them to be dressed exactly the same lmao then I remembered that IRP she likes to steal her husband’s work button-ups and wear them as sleep shirts when he’s done with them so I went for that and some cute shorts & sandals :3
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unproduciblesmackdown · 10 months
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Sorry if this is not how ask are suppose to be done (it's my first time doing an ask) but I just wanna say that your lars and sadie art have really made me rethink my gender in a good way, so thanks so much for that; and if it's ok do you think you can do an enby sadie? I've pretty much marked all your art of her as So gender!
that's Excellent!! definitely there's always [The Gender Of It All] in my drawing anything, and what's better than that art imitating life in that way becoming life imitating art, i.e. generating Gender Times irl. among the noblest causes for sure
my Drawing Motivation is always tied to "something really specific that also i feel like drawing 900k times in a row" so i can't really Fulfill Requests at any point (though technically anyone can Go For It re: venturing some suggestion, you never know, i just realistically wouldn't say you could expect it to go anywhere lol) and am in perhaps one of my nichest times ever rn lmao, it's relevant to like 0.08 people. we do have a great time though & the [gender in my art] can never end fr
and relevant to that, the silver lining good news is you can just absolutely think of whatever preexisting art resonates most nonbinarily as Definitely Nonbinary then lol, it's extremely Correct and like as the nonbinary "i never really have a fixed Gender hc for any given character and re: basically any non cis / gnc ideas/interpretations? yes" person behind it or whatever it's like yeah that is as good as official then
also might point you to the blog @uberoll-oystercrackers for relevant Genderous materials, as well as a resource for like active / recent fanworks which sure could be relevant too
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nohaijiachi · 8 months
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Why I Think The Fandom Has Been Doing Aziraphale Dirty Ever Since Season 1 And It's Only Gotten Worse With Season 2 And It's Killing Me Inside
Before we get into the subject matter of the title let me preface a couple of things:
1- All that will follow is, big surprise, my opinion and my interpretation of this character. Do I think I am The One And Only Who Gets The Blorbo Right and that my ideas are 100% the way the author(s) intended to convey the character? No.
More likely than not the way I see Aziraphale could be intensely different from the way Authorman sees him, or Actorman sees him, and I don't think that my interpretation is necessarily any more correct than anybody's else.
That said, if I also did not think that I am, in fact, correct on a certain level, I wouldn't have bothered forming such a thought out opinion of Aziraphale in the first place, nor would be sitting here, writing this post that I can already tell is going to be entirely too long and might probably ruffle some feathers.
So I'll be writing the rest of this post with the caveat that I while I do think my interpretation correct, I'm also not trying to change anybody's mind nor to discredit anybody's else interpretation of Aziraphale. We can sit here in the sandpit and hold different opinions and still be able to build sandcastles together, it really isn't that deep at the end of the day; I can assure you, I'm not here to fight nor cause fights with this one.
2- With the above point, comes also the fact that I won't bother continuously saying "In my opinion" for the rest of this post. You already know that. So, if something will come across as a bit caustic, do know that it is very much tongue in cheek and I am poking a bit of fun at general fannish habits that I am also very much quote-unquoute 'guilty' of having partaken into, and will partake into again plenty of times in the future, I'm sure.
So, with that: Here's Why I Think The Fandom Has Been Doing Aziraphale Dirty Ever Since Season 1 And It's Only Gotten Worse With Season 2 And It's Killing Me Inside
A large part of the people comprising this fandom prefers Crowley. There, I said it.
This fandom's preference blatantly skews toward Crowley. Can we admit that openly? Let's admit that openly.
To be clear, this isn't meant to be an accusation or recrimination or any other -ation you can think of, I am merely stating matter-of-factly a phenomena I've observed in the last four years.
It is also not a wrong nor bad thing in any way, shape or form. I adore Crowley myself. I love them both so much it's unreal.
But I started with that because I think it is very much a symptom of the fact that a lot of people don't get Aziraphale.
I remember back with S1 there had been plenty of times when I found myself reading discussions and opinion exchanges about Aziraphale and Crowley, their dynamics, all the things that went unsaid behind the things that were said, and found myself genuinely surprised by seeing how some people interpreted certain moments wildly different from how I personally saw them.
I look back at that and I think "Oh, sweet summer child". Nothing could have prepared me from the onslaught of takes about Aziraphale that make me go "Good lord, what???" in the wake of S2, and the infamous Last Fifteen.
Now because I don't want to be pointing fingers at specific things and risk upsetting somebody more than I already am by being open in admitting that, guys, yes, some of the takes y'all have been sharing make me go "Yikes(tm)", I'll move on the interesting part and what I would actually love to discuss, aka cracking Aziraphale's head open and see what that actual fuck is going on in there.
Another preface: Because this duo is intrinsically linked and woven together it is downright impossible to only focus on Aziraphale without also mentioning Crowley, so... Let me circle back to our fav demon bae for a sec, here.
I think the reason why it seems that a larger part of the fandom favors Crowley is because I feel like Crowley is a much easier character to grasp. He is very open in his thoughts and feelings, at any given moment us, the audience, have a much easier time watching a scene and sort of ruminating in the back of our heads about Crowley's motivations for saying the things he says and doing the things he does.
That isn't to say Crowley is a less complex character than Aziraphale. They are very much equally complex and multifaceted individuals with their strengths and weaknesses, their issues and the way they each cope with them, how differently they approach their existence and so on and so forth.
But whereas Crowley as a character presents itself with a certain dynamism and a far more outward openness about his complexity, Aziraphale does the exact opposite; we can say Aziraphale is downright hermetic about it.
For us, the audience, he presents a challenge that requires a good deal of thought being put into him to see over the facade he presents at a more superficial level; he requires time and effort to fully dismantle him in our minds to try and see what makes him thick (other than his thighs), and thus I think it is entirely natural that more people latch on the far easier to identify-with, and relate-to, Crowley.
And that is the inevitable consequence of everything that makes Aziraphale... Well, Aziraphale.
So, where to start? Let's try and jot down what Aziraphale truly is at his core.
He is a contradiction.
This man-shaped being is a walking contradiction, constantly existing in a state of being coated in three thousand layers of misdirection and obfuscation and double thinking.
Why is that? Well. He's an angel.
Aziraphale loves being an angel. It is a tenet of his entire existence and something he cherishes. He wants, so very much, to be his ideal of what a good angel is: An entity who is kind and loving and understanding and forgiving.
Of course us, the audience, know that is utter bullshit, because we know angels can be individuals just as complex as the humans Aziraphale loves so much, with all their inherent flaws and capability for cruelty. And, on a certain level, Aziraphale knows that too.
So there we have it, one element of contradiction: Aziraphale wants to think that angels are always Good and Righteous and Never Wrong; Aziraphale knows that angels aren't, in fact, always Good and Righteous and, by god, can they make plenty of mistakes, too.
What else? How about Aziraphale sitting there, being in love with a demon, fully knowing that at the end of the day demons really ain't that different from angels, and also desperately hanging onto the concept of Good vs Bad.
And he sits there, existing with these two contrasting idea equally taking space in his mind, neither side ever capable of taking over the other.
What else do we have? Aziraphale loves God and wants so hard to believe in Her love for humanity and Her ineffable plan, and Aziraphale also time and again does things that very blatantly go against Her will, lies to Her face, and Doubts. He Doubts, a lot, and that requires the capital letter because those Doubts are what spur him in going against everything he's ever told to believe in order to do the right thing.
Aziraphale's very existence is a constant push-and-pull of things he wants to believe and things he knows are real; things he's told to do and things he wants to do. That's how we get "My side" and "there's a bit of good in you" and "you are the bad guys".
And nothing he's lived through has managed to break him out of this unhealthy way of existing quite yet; that's why he acts the way we see him act in the Edinburgh flashback in S2, or at the start of S1 when Crowley has to ease Aziraphale into the idea of trying to stop Armageddon with the usual song and dance of "temptation" and "plausible deniability" and "you'd be thwarting me", even though from the start we can tell there's a little part of Aziraphale who is clearly not at ease with the idea of the end of the world, and once he's been given 'permission' by Crowley nudging him, he is all the way in with the whole saving the world business, not take-backsies.
Both the moments I mentioned here are very important for different reasons, but of the two is very much the Edinburgh flashback that gets a lot more flack by the fandom and is blatantly misunderstood, which I think is the inevitable consequence of that minisode immediately following the glorious, beautiful, heartbreaking piece of art that is the "A companion to owls" minisode.
I've seen a lot of people lamenting that Aziraphale acts obnoxiously in the Edinburgh flashback and, yeah. He does. But I feel like the fact that we are seeing this after watching Aziraphale struggle his way through saving Job's children, even being willing to go to Hell for it, is a though act to follow and probably soured Edinburgh-Aziraphale for a lot of people, made them think that the character had regressed instead of progressing.
But, see, the way he acts is wholly congruous with who Aziraphale is and has always been and keeps being up to the very end of S2. Yes, even after what he does for Job's children.
If you get down to it, Aziraphale had been ready to give up and let the children die, in episode 2. For a brief moment, after Crowley told him he 'longed to destroy the blameless children', Aziraphale was walking away, having tried all he thought he could try to do to stop this senseless act. That was until Crowley tested him by making the crows bleat, cuing Aziraphale to the fact that his impression of Crowley wasn't wrong, and the he could count on him to do the right thing.
To be clear, I don't want to undermine Aziraphale's action by only giving the credit to Crowley but... It is, also, only thanks to Crowley cajoling him and giving him the right excuses, that Aziraphale feels safe in doing what he's always wanted to do all along.
He'd wanted to save Job's children, and thought he couldn't until Crowley threw him that hell of a lifesaver. He wanted to save the world and thought he couldn't until Crowley nudged him on the path of plausible deniability.
He wanted to save Elspeth's eternal soul, blinding himself to the hardships she'd have to endure in her not-eternal life, and was smacked right in the face by the reality of human suffering multiple times.
The way Aziraphale acts in that flashback can't be a regression, because there never was a progression in the first place: He'd always walked the line between Heaven's and God's will and his own, personal morality and sense of justice.
By all means, if we look at Uz-Aziraphale and modern-day-Aziraphale at the start of S1, his reticence about the whole saving the world business should, by all means, appear as a regression as well. You mean to tell me that he'd been ready to become a demon for the sake of three mortal children, and then suddenly a handful of thousands years later when faced with the prospect of the whole world going up in flames he'd just be all like "Heaven will triumph over Hell and it will be all rather lovely"? Like, fuck off, Aziraphale, you lying double-thinker, you (/pos)
Aziraphale constantly exist while being at war with himself. Circumstances have allowed him to rebel the will of Heaven and God more or less safely time and again, but he never quite managed to break free entirely. He'd always ended up being reeled back in, being fed the party lines, being made to feel shame for his independent thinking, until it all becomes too much and he is forced to step back from that freedom he'd been inches away from grasping.
Back and forth, back and forth, never stopping.
And all of this, all of what he is, makes it so hard for us, the audience, to truly see him. To truly grasp him. To truly watch any given scene with him and figure out what he might be thinking or feeling.
To understand Aziraphale is to understand what he is not saying when he says something, which is a good deal harder to do than it is to understand and relate to a character like Crowley, who very much revel in saying exactly whatever the heck he thinks whenever he damn well pleases.
All those layers of obfuscation and misdirection and double thinking that Aziraphale coats himself in are as much an armor that makes it harder for the audience to understand him as they are his very own downfall because, good lord, if you exist like that, if you exist forced to keep things hidden from yourself, well... It's inevitable that at some point you are going to stumble into pitfalls of your own making.
And I love him for it.
So, there? I hope I managed to explain something with this post, and that it wasn't just the rambling of someone who spends way too much time thinking about her blorbos. To be clear, I don't think people who haven't spent as much time as me trying to dissect and better understand Aziraphale's character are like, dumber than me or anything. It's just that this pair of angelic-demonic blorbos take too much real estate in my mind, lol.
Feel free to let me know your opinion and if you think I am wildly off mark and my Take Is Bad. I might answer, I might not, it all depends on time and my mood ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜
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buckets-of-dirt · 1 year
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(ID: A screenshot of tags that read "#Prev what are some alternatives to the word primitive that are less derogatory" /end ID.)
@panicdeleter I'm responding to your question on a new post so that the op of the original doesn't get this in their notes because answering in good faith is going to take a lot of explanation.
Short answer: there isn't one.
Long answer: as you say in your tags, "primitive" is a derogatory term with a very loaded meaning. Removing it from your vocabulary is less a matter of finding a more PC alternative, and more a matter of understanding why it's derogatory and changing your perception of what's being discussed. To do that, we're going to have to look at archaeological theory for a minute. Stick with me, I do have suggestions at the end.
Archaeological theory is a complicated subject and there's no way I'm going to try to summarize all of it in a Tumblr post since it's a topic arch programs devote at least a semester (if not longer) to. So we'll focus on the relevant bits.
Essentially, in the bad old days when archaeology was starting to become a discipline instead of a thing rich dudes did on the weekends, there was this idea that certain European societies were the peak of civilization and everywhere else was less evolved and therefore primitive. It was based on the misunderstanding of the theory of evolution that was common at the time. Like so:
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(ID: a diagram drawn in pen. It's titled "Ye Olde Arch/Anth Theory TM". The next line says "Primitive = simple, less evolved, bad". Below it there is a vertical arrow pointing down, with the words "one way line" next to it. Under the arrow there is a line of text reading "Advanced = complex, most evolved, good". /end ID.)
These early archaeologists believed that all of humanity lived on a hierarchy with the "advanced" societies they lived in (and their ancestors like Ancient Greece) at the top and all the "primitive" past and current societies (destined to either become like them or die out eventually) at the bottom.
It's been a long road for archaeological theory. The 20th century was fraught with theoretical movements and debates that sometimes literally devolved into fistfights. But eventually we all ended up more or less here:
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(ID: A hand drawn diagram in a similar format to the one above. It's titled "Arch Theory Today (Short Version). Below the title there is a single line of text centred around a horizontal line with arrows at both ends. The left side of the arrow reads "simple" while the right side reads "complex". The line itself is labeled "continuum or spectrum". /end ID.)
While you'll still find some archaeologists who disagree, the main consensus appears to at least be on the same page that instead of the old primitive vs advanced hierarchy, societies exist on a spectrum that ranges in complexity. In the most basic terms, because I'm glossing over A LOT of nuance here, hunter gatherer societies tend towards the simple end of the spectrum while big state societies are on the more complex end. This is not meant as a value judgement of these societies, but merely an attempt to classify them so other people have a frame of reference for what you're talking about. Even so, there's considerable debate about the language used for certain terms and societies, and I am not necessarily qualified to go into that in this post.
I say all that to help you understand why I can't give you a catch-all term to replace "primitive", because if one did exist it would be just as derogatory. In certain contexts there may be more appropriate words that you can use, such as simple (as in the case of the meme that inspired this post) or old. But a lot of the time an alternative just doesn't exist because we are not better or 'more evolved' than our ancestors any more than people living in big state societies are any better than people still living as hunter gatherers.
I know this has been a very long post, but I really am just scratching the surface here. For more information I suggest looking at podcasts like The Dirt or A Life In Ruins, youtube channels like The Welsh Viking or Archaeology Tube, or the blogs of any of my fellow dirt lovers here on Tumblr like @chaotic-archaeologist, @micewithknives, @art-thropologist, @archaeologistproblems, and @rhysintherain to name just a few. Archaeologists are generally a bunch of nerds who will take any opportunity they can to talk about the human past, and we rarely bite.
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rayslittlekitten · 9 months
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I Almost Told You That I Loved You Ch. 19
Chapter 18 | IATYTILY Masterlist
A/N: I've been waiting so long (honestly like probably a year) to finally post this chapter and this GIF. 🤣
Rating: T
Word Count: 1,143
Pairing: Jax Teller x F! reader
Plot: This takes place shortly after Tara leaves Charming. You start working at Teller-Morrow and an unlikely and messy relationship forms between you and Jax.
Warnings: maybe some mild, colorful misogynistic language
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These last few days have made you nostalgic about Cara Cara. Working for a porn company doesn’t seem so bad anymore. Maybe you can ask Luann for your old job back. You’re pretty sure she’ll give it back to you, no questions asked. Although TM pays better and honestly, it couldn’t possibly get any worse. Jax has been hot and cold since the incident with Will. He’s been cautiously trying to get your attention, apologizing multiple times, but you’ve been turning down his advances. And when you do, he’s no longer groveling at your feet. His soft words turn into sharp knives instead. Your favorite so far is “I hope you choke on a dick!” That sure is going to get you to run back to him. 
Fragile male egos. You know a few things about those. They don’t actually care about making things right. They just want the last word and if things are going to end, it’s going to be on their terms, no matter how much they have to try to charm you. They will say and do anything to win you back just so they can leave you. If you can just focus on work and keep your interactions with Jax to a minimum, you might be able to get through this until the end of the semester at the very least.
“Hey, sweetheart, I’m stepping out for lunch and running some errands,” Gemma tells you as she gathers her things. “Will probably be gone for a few hours. You’ll be okay by yourself?”
“Yeah, sure,” you nod and throw her a smile, pulling yourself away from sending a fax for a moment.
“I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
As Gemma walks out, the phone rings so you walk over to answer it.
“Thank you for calling Teller-Morrow, how can I help you?”
Just then Opie waltzes into the office and leaves some filled forms on the desk in front of you.
“Yes, we can do that. If you come by with your car, we can take a look at it and give you an estimate.” You look at Opie and hold a finger up at him to let him know to give you a moment. 
“We are open 7 days a week, 8 to 6.” You glance at the form on the desk and you look like you’ve just seen a ghost. “Uh, y-yes. You have a nice day.” You hang up the phone.
“You okay?” Opie asks.
“Is this customer still out there?” You ask him.
“Yeah, he’s gonna wait for his car and wants to pay for it now. Why?”
You stare at the window for a moment before walking over to it and taking a peek outside, recognizing the blue BMW.
“Shit.”
“What? You know this guy or something?” Opie asks.
“That’s my ex-boyfriend. What the hell is he doing on this side of town?”
“You want me to handle this? I can—“
“No,” you sigh. “I’ll take care of it.” 
“You sure?” Opie asks again.
“Yeah, thank you.” You force a small smile.
Opie nods and hangs around for a moment in case you change your mind before walking out the office. When he returns to the garage, Jax walks up to him while wiping his greasy hands on a rag.
“What’s up with this preppy boy’s car?” Jax asks, his chin pointing in the direction of the blue BMW.
“Just needs his headlights changed,” Opie answers. “But also, apparently, preppy boy is Y/N’s ex.”
“What?!” Jax asks with raised brows.
“Yeah, she seemed a little spooked. Do you know what the deal is?” Opie asks as they watch you walking towards the blue BMW and its owner.
Jax doesn't answer. They can see the interaction between you and your ex is awkward and Jax sees you recoiling when your ex tries to reach out to you. Jax’s jaw twitches. He picks up the nearest tool next to him and stalks over to the both of you with a torque wrench in his hand.
“Hey, I’m gonna be the one fixing your car.”
“Jax—“
“It’s alright, darlin’,” Jax puts his arm around you. “I can take it from here.”
“Wow, are… are you dating him now? Huh. And you thought I was a piece of shit? You definitely downgraded.” A smug smile plays upon his face. "Now be a good girl and wrap this up, will ya? I have actual important things to do."
“You need your headlights changed, right?” Jax asks.
“Yeah, hope you’re smart enough to figure out that simple task,” he chuckles.
“Yeah, well it looks like you got a broken mirror too.” Jax take a heavy swing with the wrench and knocks one of his side mirrors clean off.
“What the fuck, man?!” 
“Jax!”
Just then out of nowhere, Opie jumps in.
"Whoa, whoa. I'm so sorry about that, sir. We'll fix that for you, on the house." Opie tries to pull Jax away until Jax sees you walking away.  
Jax follows you back to the office, calling out for you, and leaving Opie to sort out the mess.
“Why the fuck did you do that? You could’ve just changed his headlights and let him be on his fucking way!”
"You're pissed at me? That’s your piece of shit ex, right?” Jax points towards the lot.
“Yes, I'm pissed at you! So what if he's my ex? He was just here for his goddamn headlights. He wasn't here for me.”
“He tried to put his hands on you!”
“And? I can defend myself. Besides, what the hell was that out there? You can’t keep pulling shit like that.”
“I was just trying to protect—“
“Bullshit, Teller! You need to stop acting like we’re in a relationship every time another guy talks to me when you treat me like I’m one of your MC groupies every other week.” 
Jax scrubs his beard and looks down at his feet.
“It doesn’t mean I don’t care about you,” Jax says quietly.
“No, you only care when it's convenient for you. You don't get to pick and choose when you want to care about me."
"I'm really trying here," Jax tells you.
"Trying what exactly? I'd much rather you just treat me like shit because at least that's consistent. You're no better than him." You point in the general direction of the lot. 
"Don't compare me to that fucking asshole!" Jax shakes his head.
"You know what? You're right. You're not like him. At least he knows he's an asshole and owns up to it."
Just as Jax is about to say something, the phone rings and you pick up.
"Thank you for calling Teller-Morrow, how can I help you?"
You both stare each other down for a moment before Jax punches the wall on his way out of the office.
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daytaker · 5 months
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NightBringer Satan is a Gift.
I understand everyone has their own opinions on how good/not good NB is as a game or a story or whatever, but in my opinion, Satan's characterization is soooo enhanced by it. I know that this isn't an opinion that everyone shares, but to me, Satan felt emotionally artificial sometimes in the original game (more on that below).* He felt kind of awkward and like he wanted to connect with MC but something was blocking the kind of connection they develop with some of the other brothers. (Disclaimer: I've only done season 1 of OG, so I can't speak to how he's characterized later on. I know, I know, shame. But I'm trying my best.) Getting to see what Satan is like when he doesn't have any control over his emotions makes the stiffness and artificiality make more sense to me, and they become admirable because we get to see just how hard it is for him to get everything under control.
I think they did a really good job with the pacing of his development in NB too. Satan in Lesson 1 and Satan in Lesson 19 are different, but there isn't a moment where he suddenly starts controlling his emotions better. I think there's a lot going on behind the scenes with him as far as his emotional growth and self control are concerned.
Also let's not forget some very important things about Satan that make him, IMO, one of the most interesting characters to work with as a writer:
Satan was never an angel; he had no fall from grace.
Satan was created from Lucifer's wrath---he is literally the product of trauma and self-mutilation.
Satan is significantly younger than his brothers.
He spent the first year of his life more or less trapped in a castle with his deeply emotionally wounded brothers.
He has a deep resentment towards Lucifer that sometimes defies reason---he wishes he didn't dedicate so much of his time and energy to him, but it's basically a compulsion.
He hates his deep association with Lucifer, and he hates that he has a lot in common with him.
And these lead me to some headcanons that live rent-free in my brain every day of my life.
Satan sees himself as a reminder of the Great Celestial War and everything his brothers lost in it, including Lilith.
He is divine retribution against Lucifer for his failure, for leading his brothers to failure, for letting his sister die.
He acts as a counterbalance to Lucifer's pride by bearing the weight of the shame that Lucifer can't fully accept now that he is the Avatar of Pride. Even if Lucifer pushes it out of his mind, Satan never forgets that he failed in the worst way possible.
His biggest aspiration is to become a full and complete person outside of any association he has with Lucifer. He feels like some sort of parasitic tumor that exists only in opposition to his brother, and he wants desperately to escape that role that he feels he was born into.
Anyway, Satan is great, hail Satan, all that good stuff. Did you know I have a lot of thoughts and opinions about Satan? I know, shocking. For more of my takes here's my fic about him (on AO3).
*I think Satan almost metaphorically represents certain elements of autism---emotions that don't come out the way you intend, masking and its limitations, hyperfixations that are barely under control. In Fandom Discourse(TM) there's sometimes a level of focus on more 'cutesy' autistic traits that we find endearing in characters, like social obliviousness and gleefully indulged hyperfixations. But emotional control, emotional masking, emotional seepage, emotional artificiality---these are also real and messy and often times they aren't cute and they're uncomfortable to see in yourself or in someone else. I really don't like diagnosing characters so I'm not about to claim Satan "is" autistic, but as someone who has been called essentially 'spectrum adjacent' by doctors, I relate to the awkwardness and the desire to appear normal despite knowing you're not and emotions spilling out in ugly ways---um. That got really long and personal.
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anguishedlurker · 6 months
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What a burden you are
((Hey kids wanna see Danny have Enough(tm) of Valerie['s bullshit from Valerie's POV and the fallout thereof?))
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Valerie found herself reflecting on her time under Masters more than she already wanted, most nights.
Tonight was worse than most. A pathetic echo in her mind trying to take root as she chased a different kind of pathetic echo.
For each and every fault he had- she could spend years counting in that miserable creep of a man- he knew his ghosts and his weapons. Very little of his advice had proven inaccurate on even the most minuscule of levels.
“An afraid ghost is never to be underestimated, yet if careful they can undo themselves with hardly an effort by you.”
But no, Phantom wasn’t afraid in front of her. Insolent brat, darting from cover to cover. To boot, it had the audacity to stick it’s tongue out at her.
The humor didn’t reach its eyes though. Not tonight. Though, it always seemed a little rougher around the edges when she managed to jump it after some ghost had tried doing her work for her.
Yet it was always almost well humored to her.
Tonight really shouldn’t be different.
“Fear will destroy them- even in the living it’s hard to control a fear response. Aimless lashing out makes openings.
Rage, on the other hand…”
And yet, Phantom seemed annoyed by her hunt tonight, of all things. How inconvenient of her, really! Maybe she’d upgrade to threat one day, if she was realllll patient…
Phantoms head finally phased out of a tree, grinning at her in a way that didn’t meet it’s eyes.
“Well, this barking match has gone on long enough to prove bite-less, so I’m afraid I’m gonna have to take my leaf!”
Pew pew, cunt.
(As always, the faint sense that her dad would be reaching for the soap brushed past her mind)
She missed, of course. It’d been a long time since she’d hit Phantom.
“Chickening out already, Phantom? Thought you were better than that.”
Keep her voice low, even. Steady. Bait doesn’t work without patience. And everything seemed to hit less and less, now.
“No you don’t. And even if you did, don’t you have work? Or school? Promotions or tests to pass, even?”
Its voice echoed from nowhere in particular, giving no indication to location.
Its staunch refusal to indicate whether or not it knew anything about her was ever present.
“Oh, you’re interested in my life? How flattering. Stay the fuck away from my apartment.”
Same song new night. Lancers test was tomorrow though, but this was more important. Shitty junior year and it’s- focus. If she can’t get to it then she simply has to improve her attempts. It will crack eventually.
“Yeah yeah, kill on sight. Seriously though, Red, how do you keep standing with the way you live? You can’t possibly be getting more than two hours of sleep a night.”
Sound to the left- Pew pew. It almost sounded concerned about her.
How pathetic.
“Who’s to say I don’t sleep during the day?”
“You don’t.”
“And you know this because?”
A question with no good implications underneath, and no good answers.
Accusations to its integrity always seemed to work best. Closest thing to falling over itself it’d get, all to prove it was a ‘good person’.
Phantom finally formed away from cover, relaxed and cozy in an imaginary reclining chair. It seemed to cycle through ways to mock her, always implying that it was completely unbothered.
Kept up its little act even when it was hit! Really, to brush off the shots like it couldn’t feel them….
Been a while since she’d made it flinch, actually. No matter what she managed to do to it.
No, no. Focus.
She could see it. The lack of real humor in its eyes- whether or not it’d admit such a thing, she was getting to it. She had to drive a knife into its cracks somehow.
“People have bills. Doesn’t take crazy stalking to figure out you either have a sponsor or are stupid rich- and you kinda stopped talking to your sponsor. Was a whole thing in the ghost community? Anyways, you need to have some sort of job or some sort of parental support at this point.”
A dead smile, a tilt of the head. Teeth much too sharp in a mouth that almost could’ve passed for a real person’s.
She’ll need to hunt down- No, it’s already out. And if she gets pissed, she’s dead.
“Rage is lethal. They’re focused, and they want you dead.
And, I mean the best when I say it dear, you don’t know rage. Not in ghosts.”
She’d argue she knew plenty about rage, period, though the point was long gone.
Pew pew.
It disappeared and reappeared two feet to the right, still smiling.
Fucker.
“What can I say, I value my independence. Strong and capable, everything a hunter needs to be.”
“Uh-huh. Who’s that philosopher that said no man is an island, again?”
It pretended to tap its foot against the dead air, taking its eyes off her as it acted out exaggerated thinking. Bait to shoot.
“John Donne. Know any philosophers that ever chatted about not dragging people down?”
“Right, this has been a delight but- hey wait, I think that’s actually right. I dunno, it’s the kind of thing I’d actually have to look up-”
“Dragging. Down. Get it? Ha. Ha.”
Finger curled around the trigger, giving one attention grabbing pew.
Vanish, and re-appear.
“Only so many times I can try to say that first and foremost, not my dog. Not at that point. Just a concerned samaritan trying to figure out why a dog was loose. You don’t care, though.”
Its tone was… more clipped than usual. And it’d been a while since it’s last pun.
Good.
“Honestly, it goes beyond the dog at this point.”
“Really, Red? Nobody’s got you at gunpoint out here.”
She’d been stewing on this one a while actually. Never a better time than the present to try a new tactic, right?
“No, no. The town Phantom. The ghosts as a whole.”
“Go harass one of the Doctor Fentons’ about the tear in the fabric of reality in their basement then.”
Oh it was seething with that one.
Good.
Yet, this was an infuriating corner.
“The Fentons have made it clear that by now, they can’t do anything.”
“I’m missing the part where you turn it into my fault. And even if your point was clear, they are liars. Bad ones.”
The accusation against the Fentons integrity had to be bait. As such, asking was caving in to its plans.
“Simple. They’re after you. It’s a game that you’re encouraging.”
Its eyes narrowed, most of its pantomimes of life and movement ceasing.
Finally.
“You have no idea how much I wish they’d stop. Not that you’re willing to learn.”
“So you admit it?”
“Nothing of the sort. If they all stopped I would stop appearing.”
“Typical.”
“Mhmm.”
“Still, guess you’re just too used to dragging people down with you, right? Enough to never notice.”
“Listen, I get to hear my friends jack off to pseudo psychology enough as it is. You got your stinger loaded yet, or should I just, like, go?”
“Well since you’re asking… let me ask; were you even a blessing in life?”
The silence was palpable.
“What?”
“You heard me.”
Phantom paused, eyes narrowing further as it processed her accusation.
“What teenager is, really?” It eventually ground out, not even deigning to smile.
“I’ll have you know I was a delight.”
Wry, guiltless. Keep steady.
“Hmmm… I dunno that I believe that one, Red.”
A pretend hum, something that if written out would sound like a quip.
Its tone was completely flat.
Valerie smirked underneath her helm.
“But something like you, I can just see it. Everything falling over itself to baby your pathetic ass… How much did they give you? How much did you take from them?”
For one single second, Phantoms eyes reflected red.
“Like your dad and your hospital bills?”
Silence.
And then, rage.
“So help me, Phantom-”
“No, no Red- Let’s- I’m done, okay? You- I blaze through and you blame me, fine.”
Her shots missed, of course
“But, Valerie, how much do you cost your dad in medical bills at this point? Delight my left asscheck.”
Even in her rage, she had to pause. She’d never heard it swear.
Her shots missed again.
“You sign up to the most insane asshole you can find just to hunt down what- even with your little revenge fantasy- is some fucking teenager-”
Lots and lots of swearing.
Phantom was properly pissed this time.
Good, it was getting old not getting to it.
And nothing it could say can-
“Hell, I looked it up once- You know your little punctured lung you got off of Skulker? That your dad had to drag you out of the wreckage for and strip your suit off just to keep your little job secret? Boom, median of six grand. Right there.”
… how much?
“What does every bill combined add to Valerie? You wanna- how much of a burden- Jesus Christ. How much of a burden are you? Good god.”
How much…?
...
No, no it had to be bait. Hospitals are expensive but- well… very expensive- but!- … how much?
She was in combat.
“Deny a girl her hobbies, eh? But finally, so you do-”
“No shit I know who you are. Some chick shows up with a revenge fetish against me? I‘m investigating.”
Fucking- fetish??
“And here I though there could be some proof not all highschoolers are assholes.” She snarked, not paying attention to what she was saying. Scripts were running in her brain with no checks to see if it was sensible or not.
“I didn’t make it to highschool, Valerie. You want to kill a middleschooler, and you can’t even tell me what you’ve costed your dad to get here.”
Her gun, for the first time in... a very long time, dropped from its lock on Phantom.
“You can’t tell me what you cost but you’re just soooo cozy with telling me I must’ve been a- Fuck you. Genuinely. Did you even know the dog was one your fathers company killed? Bet you didn’t. Allll their guard dogs in training were put down for that pretty security system. A middleschooler and a dead puppy.”
“You are not a middleschooler.”
Her breathing hitched too much, she was losing herself. Phantoms youthful (manipulative, fake, anything else please) looked at her with no warmth.
No humor.
“Not anymore, no. The dead don’t have school.”
Its tone was openly cold and resentful.
In front of her was a ghost, whom she hated. It was a violent, mean, and dishonest thing with no regard for other people.
And the same eyes it’d always had stared back at her right now. Phantoms features had never budged the slightest nanometer, the last two years.
Youthful as ever.
Pew, pew.
It did not move, and it did not flinch.
“It’s been a long time since you could hurt me Valerie.”
Borderline glacial towards her, like she was a particularly stupid child.
But maybe she deserved that one, because of all things, she should’ve seen that it wasn’t acting unbothered by her shots.
“Ask your dad how much you cost him before lecturing me on- Just. God. There’s something genuinely wrong with you. And I’m not protecting you anymore, not if that’s seriously how you’re gonna treat- just… fuck you.”
It had disappeared before she could re-aim her gun at it for the audacity. Protecting her? Bullshit.
But, all alone now, board humming underneath her, left her stewing over the entire conversation.
And, well…
At least she’d obviously touched a nerve.
~~~
More than she’d ever be worth in her life, ever again, was her answer. Not the one he said, but she knew what evasion looked like. She knew what it meant.
And how much did he pay per month?
More than what they had to spare, was not said. He’d never say it.
A new fight breaking out near her was a relief, one she didn’t dwell on.
She’d just have to be careful to not get hurt. It was so simple.
And then the battle between Skulker and lunch lady halted at her appearance, Skulker turning smug while Lunch Lady looked away abruptly.
“And what the fuck do you think you’re gonna do, looking so happy over there?” She asked, strafing left as she aimed her gun.
Skulker didn’t move as the metal helm grinned wider. Lunch Lady vanished.
“Did you know Phantom declared open season on you?” Was the last thing she heard before her world was crushed.
~~~
Her dad would never blame her. Never say it.
Never tell her she was a burden.
But now- god, how much did this cost? Doctors were saying to just hope she wasn’t permanently paralyzed. Hope that she could eventually write again with her left hand, or learn to use her right.
She’d be out of school for a long time now.
At least she missed Lancers dumb test.
The heart monitor was her only company through the pain meds (that she refused most of) and incessant nurses.
Until…
“Danny?”
Silent as mist, as always. She hadn’t heard the door. But there he was, looking like he always did.
Except…
“Listen, I’m not really here to talk. I was voted to bring you your homework and flagged down to pass a note.”
His face tight, his tone blank.
“I’m sure you have things to do.”
He was probably itching to go back to trying to help his sister around the house, sweeping after the absolute tornadoes that were his parents.
A real shame Jasmine never left. An even greater shame she never admitted why she settled for the local college.
She could’ve gone places.
“Sure. Let’s go with that.” He gruffed, setting a binder of work on the first table he could find.
“Here’s your card.”
Huffed out, the card tossed with laser accuracy to her non injured hand. She’s lucky she caught it, the pain meds she couldn’t deny like weights on her one good hand.
This was- what did she do?
“Danny, what-”
“I don’t really want to hear it. ‘Cause it’s about time you knew that I know damn well what you do in your off time, and did this to yourself really.”
N
No…
No.
“And when exactly did you find out that-”
“The entire goddamn time, Val! Remember the stupid flour baby? The job I was threatening you with was ghost hunting, not being the Nasty Burger mascot! Which! I still hold to that if you weren’t ghost hunting, it wouldn’t have been that hard to do your half!”
He- no, not that long. Impossible. Nobody else had even looked at it as a serious-
He’s always been a little smarter than what he lets everyone know.
The last lick of sense echoed through what had to be the meds. Danny, always there, seeming to know more than what anyone had ever told him. Easy to work with, happy to obey. He made it so very easy to forget he was so bright.
Focus.
“Fine, fine! But I didn’t- Skulker-”
“God- just… God. Don’t. Nobody asked you to fight them. You tossed out everything and everyone that didn’t fit to do it, too.’
“I didn’t do-”
“We are not friends, Valerie. You don’t have any friends, and we’re barely ex’s at this point. And for what?”
“Barely even- What are you on about??”
“Val, we dated for like, two weeks two years ago! And you dumped me to go chase after Phantom, ‘cause fuck having a real life with friends or a boyfriend!”
It was like a fun house mirror held up to those memories, how he stood there now.
Never did get taller, never did lose most of the baby fat. Now standing there seething with hate instead of adoration.
He still looked as frail as ever.
“But Phantom-”
“Shut up, take your homework, and read your shitty card.” He growled, already heading for the door.
No- No! It’s just- This isn’t like Danny! Danny… Danny just never swore- it was like, hardcoded into him!
“And what the fuck did I do to earn this? God, if it turns out you got possessed-”
Danny paused, looking back at her for a split second. So short she could’ve hallucinated it the heartstopping look before he went straight back to having his hands on the door, ready to bolt.
“Would you say that shit to me?”
“I… What?”
“What? You don’t think I ever managed to talk to some of the ghosts? I know what you said to him. Would you say it to me?”
“Of course not!”
“No, no, of course you wouldn’t. Never would even think about it, right? Fentons too cute and innocent, and small to- ugh. I know why you never tried making friends with me and Tuck- Sam hated you- but- fuck. Don’t talk to me.”
She had nothing left. Danny was-
Too cute, innocent, and small to spew this kind of hatred at her?
Ugh… Who knew such an adorable little face could be so mean...
He looked ready to slam the door. He looked like it was taking great restraint to not, every muscle so obviously tense underneath all his layers.
It’s a wonder how he never overheated.
And at the last second, he hesitated.
“I never wanted you hurt, I… I promise, even if I’m mad. Enraged, even. But I just don’t know what you thought was going to happen, anymore.”
And then it was slammed shut, leaving her with the sinking feeling he was gone forever from her life.
… fuck.
Alone, again now, with a heart monitor and a card from- Well, Danny hadn’t mentioned.
God that stung. Couldn’t even stay to say who still had a heart for her.
She needed to move on, already, because burnt bridges weren’t going to get fixed any time soon. And that left the card as her only option forward right now, right?
It was just folded printer paper, with no decoration on the outside.
And on the inside-
One logo, seared into her brain well over two years ago. Looking at her.
“I don’t know why I thought you were worth defending.
They won’t be nice about it ever again.
-DP”
She hid the card under her hip, eventually. Made a nurse toss it out the next time one came around.
Pretended like she hadn’t seen it.
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decepti-thots · 9 months
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would you be down to give me a rough outline of how Prowl has been characterized over the publication history of the tf comics? I mean, in as far as you know about it. Every time you mention the costa stuff it makes me curious
I can try! I can't really drill down well without a thing to focus on specifically, but here are some general highlights.
Furman (and stuff that directly draws from Furman's run, like AHM as a whole) characterizes him basically as he did when writing Marvel G1, and gives him so little to do that not very much really comes out even then. Uptight, stick-in-his-ass, still a basically Good Guy TM and while he puts people's backs up a little, he's not under any level of suspicion. This is the closest to continuity-agnostic "fanon Prowl" you get in IDW, because that fanon figure draws quite a lot on the Marvel G1 characterization (when it isn't simply making things up wholesale, anyway). Furman copies his own homework, basically, lmao.
Roche is the guy who wrote phase two Prowl into existence as we know him. Rather infamously because he thought it was an interesting take on the character to er, ignore all the above stuff and make the Autobot SIC a rat bastard, lmao. Roche and Barber's interpretations came to dominate the character in IDW going forward, but they do differ. Roche's Prowl is more isolated from other characters (one does not really imagine Wreckers Prowl calling Bumblebee his best friend sincerely, as exRiD Prowl does), and people treat him as disliked by default. Even before the worst of what he does comes out, his reputation precedes him. Also, Roche's Prowl speaks fairly neutrally, whereas exRiD Prowl speaks more casually than fandom tends to admit to! Finally, Roche's Prowl is less spontaneously, outwardly emotional than Barber's is later on, and tends to fit the fanon stereotype of "always restrained" more.
Costa came in post-AHM but pre-Wreckers and hated all that, so he retconned it. LMAO. His Prowl is the archetype of the "good cop" protagonist surrounded by corruption, combined with surface level noir tropes that sort of work in tandem with those but lacking any grit. (Costa seems to understand what noir looks and sounds like, but none of the underlying narrative devices that make it function as noir.) This Prowl is specifically supposed to be (here's the retcon) someone who used to be more deliberately cold, removed and logical but who has specifically decided to change to be different following his experiences on Earth. (Spotlight: Prowl is a good one-issue explanation of Costa's perspective on Prowl, which is not the same as being a good comic.) As time goes on, the sheer unpopularity of this take pushed Costa to undo it a bit, and reintroduce some level of ambivalence to him... but by and large he remains kind of the "good authority figure who objects when the systems are misused" type, almost? His conflict with Spike is very much over the fact he expected better of Spike, see.
Barber's Prowl notably does not wholly throw the Costa stuff out the window. (This is why the Spike stuff features a lot; it's really the only strong emotional hook Costa's work gives you for his version of the character to grab at.) But Prowl is back to being a morally gray figure whose moral ambivalence is very strongly tied to his role as an authority figure- and that's worth mentioning. Prowl's downward spiral being intrinsically linked to his refusal to relinquish authority, and his abuse of it, is something that is all Barber and not Roche. (In Wreckers, Prowl is an asshole because of personal arrogance. In exRiD, he's more an asshole because of his role enabling a wider system, by the end. IMO that's a big difference, anyway.) He is not starting off exRiD loathed by absolutely everyone, or a figure of preexisting serious mistrust. That's something that develops over the course of the comic as things come to light for the characters in-universe, meaning exRiD Prowl feels like he's put up a more convincing shield in front of his worse dealings over the course of the war, perhaps. His position deteriorates significantly over the comic. He is more prone to balancing his deliberate cold-heartedness with angry or emotional outbursts than we saw in Wreckers, leading to him having multiple outbursts that worsen his situation over the course of the comic. This is the Prowl who holds grudges.
Roberts' Prowl is kind of different to talk about to the above because his Prowl in Shadowplay and his Prowl in Titans Return are different genres. I can do a post on that if folks really want but it probably is its own post, haha.
IDK feel free to clarify any specific stuff you'd like a vibe on if you want, this is all just what came to my mind instinctively!
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tyrantisterror · 10 days
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Top ten favorite Orcs? Either specific characters or a given setting’s take on the species as a whole.
I'm not sure I have enough strong feelings about Orcs to really make an interesting list of ten, but what the hell I'll try.
Tolkien's orcs - not just LOTR orcs, but specifically orcs as written by J.R.R. Tolkien - are pretty high up there for me. I've probably mentioned this more than enough on this blog, but I'm still moved by the moment in The Lord of the Rings where we get this conversation between two orcs when their bosses aren't around, where both of them commiserate with each other about how shitty being drafted into Sauron's war is, how they long to go back to their simpler life as mountain bandits, and how, maybe, if they could find a way to escape being caught by their superiors, they could run off and find someplace far from the war to settle down together. Their names are Shagrat and Gorbag, and later in the book one of the heroes finds them among a pile of dead orcs, their dream of a simpler life tragically unfulfilled. I bring this up because, for all the flak Tolkien's cosmology gets for codifying the fantasy trope of "Always Chaotic Evil" races, there's a lot more moral complexity to his "evil" races than most people think. The orcs we meet in his stories are universally pretty nasty people - even Gorbag and Shagrat can't conceive of a simple life that doesn't involve killing people for their valuables - but it's very clear this is a result of the culture they are living in, which, if you get nerdy and read up on the Lore (TM), is one that has been specifically designed by the Middle Earth equivalent of Satan to turn all living things in it into tools of warfare - a world that exists solely to serve as a vast machine of industrialized conquest and mass murder. And it makes them miserable. Orcs don't like living this way, even though it's the only way they know how to live. They are at once victim and villain, and that's explicitly the canon way to look at them in the text. So it kind of sucks that their reputation in pop culture - and how they're presented in most adaptations, including good ol' PJ's film trilogy - is as one-dimensional evil henchmen, because they do have more going on than that in the books themselves, and it enriches the themes of the story when those dimensions are included.
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The orcs in Rune Factory are probably my favorite from a design standpoint. I'm kind of neutral at best with the standard "green skinned humans with optional tusks" look of most orcs. There's nothing wrong with it, but it doesn't thrill me either, existing in the same nebulous space as, like, traditional fantasy elves, dwarves, and hobbit expies - I understand why they're classics, but they feel kind of boring when you've got other options on the table. So seeing these guys when I booted up my first Rune Factory game was a revelation - finally, orcs that look INTERESTING! And they're so cute, these gnarly little Jim Hensen/Brian Froud style pig people. And they'll help you water your plants! A+ Tier orcs as far as I'm concerned.
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Dungeon Meshi found a good middle ground between "gnarly boar people" and "humans with tusks" that I really like, and while the orcs aren't given a whole lot of focus, what world building we do get about them is pretty great, taking a lot of the classic orc tropes and giving them that Ryoko Kui caliber thought and detail that makes them so wonderful.
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What else... well, ok, my brain still categorizes these guys as "goblins" rather than "orcs," but since the two are more or less synonymized in both Tolkien and the Rankin Bass adaptations of his work, I guess I can include them. They're one of my favorite designs for goblins of all time, and since I generally like goblins more than orcs, I guess this makes them my favorite orc design by default? I just love them, nasty little toad people.
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The 1980 Return of the King movie in particular is one of the few adaptations that keeps Tolkien's sympathy for the orcs in tact, with Frodo even having a dream sequence about living in a world where his run in with orcs is fully pleasant, each of them waving at each other as they cross paths, content to share a beautiful world together.
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And while it adapts the parts of the text that take place after the deaths of poor Shagrat and Gorbag, it still manages to work in a moment where the orcs lament their lot in life by way of the infamous "Where There's a Whip There's a Way" song written just for the film. I know this song is generally viewed as "bad" and corny and whatever, fuck that, I unironically love it. It's my wakeup alarm for workdays. I am these orcs five days out of the week.
What else...
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So, like, kind of a cheat I suppose, but the Darkspawn in Dragon Age take a lot of cues from Tolkien's take on orcs, right down to seeming like they're just always chaotic evil at first glance, and also being the product of Supernatural Crimes Against Nature by semi-divine powers. And indeed, in Dragon Age Origins you're basically given no reason to view them as anything but evil obstacles to destroy, especially when you learn the body-horror involved in how they reproduce (it's more in the vein of Slither than Goblin Slayer, for those unaware - grotesque but, thankfully, not in that way).
But the big ol' DLC for the same game, called Dragon Age Awakening, throws a big monkey wrench in that view of them. We meet Darkspawn who are capable of speech - ones that have been broken free of the evil hivemind their species is ruled by, and, like freed borg drones, are now at a loss of what to do with themselves. They are, like Tolkien's orcs before them, a people who were made for war and violence, and yet still crave something more than that when given the chance to think about it. It's something that hasn't been followed up on much since, sadly, but it's a damn cool take.
What else...
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I'm probably the only person who still remembers this movie, especially with any fondness, but I liked the orcs in the Warcraft movie directed by David Bowie's son. They were given a lot of nuance and I honestly think their parts of the film were by the far the best. Actually I remember liking that movie a lot despite some of its pacing issues, I should revisit it.
Ok that's not ten takes but I feel like there are at least 10 designs on display here so I'm calling this done.
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octagoncalibrator · 3 months
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Nebula devblob Feb '24
This is a crosspost from cohost.
Thinking I'm going to start doing a weekly or fortnightly summary of changes on Nebula in a given week. Probably not going to be the most super thorough or well structured post, as I am a bit scatterbrained at the best of times, but heigh ho.
Nebula SS13 is an open source project based on the Baystation 12 version of Space Station 13. SS13 is a topdown multiplayer simulation game where you play the crew of a ship, station, colony, etc. depending on your fork and map, with the Nebula and Bay forks having a focus on roleplaying and simulation interactions.
Notable changes
Traitors (sort of like mafiosos in Mafia, secretly assigned antagonists) were getting tasked with assassinating their own informants among the crew. That has been fixed.
Quite a bit of work has been going into the fluid simulation. The current sim is a bit haphazard and allows you to use crewmembers or monkeys as sponges to soak up any flooding, since the water goes into their touching reagent holder and vanishes into thin air.
Lots of optimization work being done by Penny, mostly around initialization time, event registration/deregistration, and various smaller fixes and streamlining from her downstream project Lighthouse.
Outstanding bugs of note
There's a fun issue with the dev branch currently where, due to some changes to how atoms handle temperature changes, if you put a human in a 100C environment, all their blood will instantly coagulate into one giant clot. This has absolutely no negative impact on the human.
A serious client crash issue has been narrowed down to specifically trying to cut the tail off a humanoid mob with one. As soon as you dismember the tail, everyone within viewing distance will experience a hard client crash to desktop. This may simply be God's punishment; investigation continues.
Using an elevator to descend a level can drop you into a small patch of vacuum for unclear reasons. If you're very unlucky, that one tick of total pressure loss can explode your lungs. Use the stairs for now, it's better for you.
Current priorities
We have a few PRs waiting for merge into the 5th staging period, where we shake as many bugs as we can out of the dev branch before marking it an official release and pushing it to the stable branch. When those go in, we'll start r5 staging. Exciting stuff.
I'm working on some changes around enhancing the cooking system and the general experience of interacting with food. So far I've rewritten utensils to work a bit better - previously they liked to just teleport a chunk of food from your meal into your guts, bypassing all checking of petty things like 'can I actually fit this food in my stomach' and 'am I physiologically capable of eating this mint without exploding'. Next up: Soup(tm).
I kinda wanna add fishing? But I don't just want to use Polaris fishing where you click a rod on some water and wait for 300 years. Pondering how responsive a Stardew Valley fishing minigame would be in BYOND...
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I just saw Barbie. I'm writing meta about it. This is your spoiler warning. Do not read past this if you don't want to be spoiled. Additionally I'm going to discuss radical feminism and liberal feminism. I am neither I'm a feminist, but as a trans person I find both strains to be inaccessible and I prefer a more intersectional approach, just to state my bias upfront. Additionally I anticipate getting multiple "it's not that deep" comments on this meta. To which I respond that the movie may be deeply unserious at times but it does try to tackle gender which means we should get to talk about it.
I do want to acknowledge that this is the movie of the year, and that it's made by Mattel and Warner Brothers and as such it was literally never going to be based and the best we can hope for is what it was, which is liberal girlboss feminism. The movie was very fun and very good and it did have a surprisingly coherent view of gender and it did some things that I did like when it came to that HOWEVER as a gay transgender man watching the movie it's lack of a queer perspective was very obvious to me and took me out of it occasionally.
So I just want to establish for those who have not seen it but are reading this meta how gender works in this movie. And to recap the movie with a focus on the gender stuff rather than the main Pinocchio plot. The movie starts in Barbie land where Barbies have a good day every day and Kens only have a good day when Barbies smile at them. In Barbie land all the powerful jobs are occupied by Barbies and all the Kens have the nebulous job of "beach" which means that whatever the Barbies decide goes and the Kens are more or less subject to their whims (no word on how the Midges or Skippers or Allen fit into this barbie based higherarchy. One could guess based on a couple of scenes but it's never really lingered on)
Ken(Ryan Gosling)'s world revolves around Barbie(Margot Robbie). Ken(RG) is Barbie's(MR) boyfriend, but Barbie is good friends with Ken(Simu Liu) who she dances with and who is generally less cringefail than Ken(RG). Ken(RG) is frequently jealous of Ken(SL). Ken(RG) is also somewhat taken for granted. Barbie doesn't seem to care that much about him. He tries to kiss barbie, she doesn't reciprocate. Ken tries to hang out with Barbie, she kicks him out because it's girls night, as it is every night. So on and so forth. Barbie is not obligated to care about Ken, but she's clearly not putting in any work into maintaining this creator ordained relationship and it's clearly upsetting to Ken.
Barbie is experiencing some Real Girl tm problems such as flat feet and thoughts of death and weird Barbie who has been played with too much sends her into the real world to fix it. Ken(SL) goads Ken(RG) into going with Barbie into the real world. When Barbie learns Ken is coming her immediate assumption is that he'll slow him down.
When Ken and Barbie enter LA Barbie immediately starts experiencing Misogyny. Ken similarly starts experiencing privileges as a man which he did not have in Barbie land. This is heavy handed. Barbie verbally states that she feels like she's being gawked at in an almost violent way and Ken says he feels admired in a not at all violent way (with the outfit Ken was wearing and how he was still carrying himself with deference to barbie I sincerely doubt he would experience exactly 0 homophobia but it was necessary for him to feel that way in order to make his character arc work so I'll let it slide).
Ken goes for a walk without Barbie while barbie does plot relevant activities. He sees women showing respect to men, he sees a slide show of some kind of male role models. He feels like he can be something in this world. So he goes to a middle school library and picks up some books about patriarchy. He tries to get a job in the real world, it goes poorly, so he decides to go back to Barbie land and establish patriarchy there.
Barbie comes back to Barbie land with a friendly human woman named Gloria who works for Mattel and her MCR listening 12 year old daughter. On the way she tells her new human friend and her daughter that Barbies are in charge in Barbie land and women have all the important jobs. But as they drive into Barbie land they find that Ken has gone full radfem in their absence. He's flipped the Barbie-Ken higherarchy on its head. He's turned the dream house into a man cave. And he's some how convinced the Barbies to behave like sandwich making foot massage providing girlfriends.
And here's where I would like to start doing some meta. What has happened here? Ken is essentially a (less complex than human on account of being a doll) cisgender heterosexual white woman. He is in proximity to the ruling party, Barbie who is like a cishet white man. Ken is not on the margins the way that Allen and Midge are. His occupation is Barbie's boyfriend. Ken got a taste of what it was like when the gendered oppression that he is used to is flipped and he decided that's what he wants. He doesn't much care how the discontinued dolls feel about this, he's not thinking about them, nor is the movie. He doesn't really see a problem with there being a division between Barbies and Kens, he doesn't see a problem with one group being subservient. He just doesn't want to be low on the food chain. Ken is right to want liberation for Kens but he thinks that he can obtain that by taking the jobs away from Barbies and giving them to kens. This is why I said Ken has gone full radfem in Barbie's absence. He hasn't gotten rid of the gender essentialism, he hasn't questioned whether power should be shared between Barbies and Kens. Ken is right to throw Barbies shit out of the dream house and kick her to the curb, she doesn't value him like he deserves from a relationship. He's wrong to try to change the constitution to put Kens in charge and change it to Kenland and force all Barbies into the position that Kens previously occupied. I relate this to radfems because radical feminism relies on bioessentialist assumptions and posits that men are always oppressors by their nature and that women would be better off without them. A lot of what makes terfs angry at trans women is that trans people question whether women and men are so easily separately boxed like this and trans women specifically are seen as male infiltrators. Most of them succumb to becoming transphobes before people but on a base level radical feminism is a reactionary hatred of men that is usually based in genuine hurt. Ken is on some all Barbies are pigs shit here rather than examining society and attempting to make it more equitable. I think he needs to sit down with Magic Earring Ken and talk about gender to gain some perspective.
Both me and the movie agree that Kens knee jerk Ken liberation at the Barbies' expense is wrong. Ken even later acknowledged that he didn't even care about patriarchy he just wanted to feel valued. But where me and the movie start to be at odds is when they do a girl boss style ousting of the Kens. Gloria gives a speech about the female grievance she has from the real world and it somehow works on the Barbies despite the fact that the movie previously established that sexism and all of its intricacies and the feelings it engenders are completely foreign to the Barbies. But the Barbies have always been in charge in Barbie land. They're passingly familiar with real world sexism as an abstract concept that they believe they defeated in the 1960s, but they don't experience it, they live in a everyone is valid girlboss utopia. The only way to become ugly is for someone in the real world to play with you too hard, something they can't control. There's no pressure to be pretty because everyone is already pretty and they compliment each other routinely. Barbie doesn't experience any problems being perfect until Gloria starts drawing her with existential dread, and all of the other Barbies are horrified by it as if they've never heard of such a thing. It's a malady that their dear friend is experiencing not a fact of life like it would have to be for Gloria's message to land.
Then they come up with this plan and they free the Barbies and use romantic jealousy to turn the Kens against each other. My problem with this is that in the established world where Kens are the repressed gender, this is essentially putting a bunch of dolls who's oppression is based in being a romantic object for Barbie into misery business ass situations. We're really weaponizing the Kens' internalized misandry against them and saying girlboss? The Kennish desire for Barbie's validation is being used as a tool to oppress them and the movie just... Doesn't see it despite seeming to having coherent liberal feminist messaging*.
Speaking of Liberal feminist messaging. When the Kens realize they've been turned against each other they link arms and head to where the Barbies are. The Barbies have put their constitution back in place. Ken(RG) realizes he's lost and he runs inside crying and Barbie comes to comfort him. Barbie pays lip service to Ken finding who he is without her and to them being "Barbie" and "Ken" instead of "Barbie and Ken" but then when the Kens band together and ask for a supreme court justice President Barbie gives them a concession of a lower court justice and the Kens have to work their way up, the voice over stating that maybe they'll get to where women are irl in a couple decades, and this is treated as a victory somehow. Like putting the girl boss barbietopia back in place at the expense of the Kens is somehow better than the Kens doing the same but in the opposite direction. This after she apologizes to weird Barbie and offers her a cabinet position, treating the most ostracized barbie as more valuable then any Ken.
The closest the movie ever comes to acknowledgeing a perspective outside of the Barbie/Ken binary is when Allen tries to leave Barbieland during the Ken takeover. Allen seems discontented with both the barbieocracy and the kenocracy and he tries to escape containment when Gloria and her emo daughter are leaving Barbie land. He argues that no one will give a shit about a life-sized Allen in the real world because nobody remembers Allen and then he tries to leave with them. Gloria and her daughter change their minds and go back to help Barbie and Allen's plot line just ends there.
There's all these cameos from background and discontinued Dolls. Skipper who's boobs get bigger, Barbie who's a camera, sugardaddy Ken, and magic earring Ken are all in weird Barbies weird house, Midge has a house near Barbie but is judged by the voiceover for being a pregnant doll and Barbie seems to agree, and Allen is the only one who doesn't have duplicates and is sort of in the background casting doubt, but they never follow through on these dolls place in the higherarchy. Which is fine, this movie is the Barbie movie, it's about stereotypical Barbie becoming a real girl and going to the gynecologist. But I do think that they established some dolls on the margins and then left them there, and as someone on the margins in real life I want to know what's going on with them. Most people going to this movie are gonna be Barbies and Kens so they don't touch on it and I think that's kinda sad, but not every movie has to be for me I guess.
TL;DR: the Barbie movie lacks a queer perspective and has some moments where it's stated gender metaphor falls apart because of its necessarily liberal politics.
All that said. I liked the movie. I'm leveling this criticism because it was better than I expected it to be. I didn't expect to go into the theatre and think about gender like that and I did so it deserves points for that even if I have problems with the execution. I thought it would be a shallow Pinocchio plot but it did something fresh with the doll who wants to be a real girl plot and it was genuinely good cinema in terms of the effects and the music and the visual motifs. It was a fun experience I laughed several times. I would recommend it despite being critical of it.
*coherent in that it is a message that has semi consistent internal logic not in that it's internal logic is correct or sound.
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phopollo · 8 days
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*getting on my hands and knees* Please I would love to know more about your fairytail rewrite, I have also just decided to do a rewatch of it and I am dying for more content/more people to talk about it with (also i love your designs so far and especially the focus on my girl Juvia... would love to know your ideas for both ex phantom lord guys actually)
AKFNWKG OMG HI YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME
GAJEEL & JUVIA MEAN SO MUCH TO ME, BOTH INDIVIDUALLY AND AS A DUO, AND I WAS SO SAD ABOUT HOW THEYRE TREATED IN CANON (especially Juvia,,, she was my favorite, but she got done so dirty when they stopped allowing her to he her own character outside of loving Gray,,,) SO IM ELATED YOU WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT THEM, BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT THEM SO MUCH
So!!
I'll start with them as a duo
While members of Phantom Lord, none of the Element 4 were really like.... friends per say, but Gajeel and Juvia had the closest thing to being like........ friendly coworkers of all the relationships among them. Juvia was kind of the only one Gajeel really respected, and Juvia recognized thar Gajeel treated her with as much respect as he could, so she reciprocated (think like,,, verbally acknowledging each other as they passed in the halls, but calling each other by last name)
After joining Fairy Tail, in the immediate aftermath, everyone was still a little cautious of them for understandable reasons. So they kind if unintentionally cling to each other, because..... yknow. They're the only ones not giving each other the side eye, so it doesn't feel like they have to claw through a wall of tension to just hold a simple conversation
The turning point for them into actual friendship is when people start to give them more of a chance! In particular, on a day that Fairy Tail is getting A Bit Rowdy(tm) in the guild hall, and Gajeel turns around, expecting Juvia to have his back, and shes.... she's not there........... and now that he thinks about it, it's been a bit rainy today............... so he gets a little worried and goes looking for her, only to find her hiding in the bathroom because she got a bit overwhelmed and overstimulated because she's never had so many people approach and try to talk to her all at once and never been involved in a brawl like that that wasn't an actual like, fight, and she just...... she needs a minute. So. Gajeel sits with her a bit, because. Yknow. It wouldn't be worth it to go out there and pick fights with everyone and have fun if she's not also going to. It's just not as fun
They get a little awkward sitting there in silence and Gajeel gets antsy. He looks at himself in the mirror, and then down at Juvia and her perfectly styled hair. He goes "Hey wanna help me wash my hair?" And she kind of. Stares at him for a few seconds.
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(Bonus doodles of when I was initially thinking about this but never planned to post bc my hand writing is ILLEGIBLE)
So Gajeel takes care of his hair now (very important about him and his character and the change in his hair style between Phantom Lord and Fairy Tail)
And after that, they accidentally become Natsu-And-Lucy-But-Cool-Tones
And they're very silly, and I love them very much
Whoops, that on its own was a little longer than I intended, but I'll still go into them individually too
Gajeel;
His insecurity about falling behind the other dragon slayers is a little more prevelant-- he just kind of always feels like he has something to prove
An important part of the Rewrite to me is thst there's the opportunity for characters who didn't really seem to interact as much get the opportunity to, so I'll also put out there thst Gajeel forms pretty tight bonds with Wendy, Erza, team Shadow Gear as a whole not just Levy, and the Strauss siblings
I don't think he really knows what he actually likes to do in his free time. He kind of just tags along with other people doing things they like to do
He's roughly very similar to how he was in canon. A lot of the work I've done on him has been more just smoothing out the edges and adjusting his behavior to reflect the people I've declared him the closest to
Juvia;
It's so important to me that she gets to be a character outside of being in love with Gray. She does still have a crush on him, and she's not super subtle about it, but she's also like.... she's capable of being a normal person around and about him. They are genuinely friends above anything else
She had no idea how to talk to anyone. Cana and Mirajane were lowkey her saviors when it came to learning how to interact with other people and not be a complete freak, so she's super tight with them in particular
In canon, we were shown both thst she made her own Teru Teru Bozus, and that she knit Gray a scarf once. There's also a couple other things we're shown that its never explicitly state she made them, but I feel like the implication is there. So I'm taking those and running with them-- I'm making her a really crafty person, and she loves and takes a lot of comfort in doing things like sewing, knitting, and crocheting, and that's something she notably does in her free time-- especially since she doesn't just do them for the sake of doing them, she almost always makes something for someone (got a little drawing about this incoming actually)
We only really got to know the bare minimum of Juvia's backstory-- that her parents are dead, she was taken in by her uncle who did his best to help her and her rain problem by seeking out water and ice wizards, and then he also died while seeking help for her-- so I've expanded on it a little and made some minor changes! Longest story short; her father died in a workplace accident before she was born, and her mother died during child birth, which is what lead to her being taken in by her uncle. As much as he loved her and was doing his best with her, he also kind of always resented her and blamed her for the death of his sister (her mom) even though it really was not her fault. Juvia sort of always recognized this, but also as a traumatized child, blamed herself, which lead to the intensifying of the rain around her as she got older and understood things better. That's when her uncle started looking for other water wizards and ice wizards to try and help stop the rain. He went out one day to meet with one, and he never came back. Juvia doesn't know if something happened or if the resentment finally built of too much and he just up and left, and that's something she's never going to get closure on. It definitely still plagues the back of her mind and affects the way she acts now, even if she thinks she's moved past that point in her life.
Woah
That was a lot, sorry akfbskd
I hope this was at least some of what you wanted to hear about them!!
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Hi how's your day going? Just wanted to vent and say I'm pissed at what sounds like Ryan being sidelined and casually belittled in the latest cast interview/promo 😑 i.e. apparently zero mention of Eddie's storyline for s7, Tim once again making the tired joke about eddie being "too pretty to kill off" (kind of insulting considering how much Eddie and Chris have brought to the show since s2), seems like the only thing Ryan got to say was something incredibly sweet and complimentary about working with Gavin 🥺😍 and fandom just thinks it's funny "well he IS pretty". If that's all Eddie is to buddie fandom...that just confirms everything I've been complaining about the last couple of years 🙃
Thank you @blutterlie for the ask. I'm doing well and I hope you're doing well too.
I read through the snippets that were posted on 911blr from the panel interview that was done a couple of nights ago with the main cast and the showrunner and... I really don't have words. But to say I was disappointed is an understatement.
I was really hoping things would be different for Eddie and Chris, the characters and RG and GM, the actors this season since it seems like KR got the boot and is no longer sitting in the showrunner's chair. Hopefully she is gone and if so, maybe someone other than Buck (Eddie, Chris, Chimney and Bobby because they were all sidelined in the last two years while the other half of their ships got good storylines) can get a storyline or two but I can't say I'm surprised with the outcome.
Apparently TM cares about the big emergencies which is great and all but it would be better IMO if they stopped trying to recreate scenes from movies (Speed, Poseidon and whatever other movies they've copied) and focus on growth of the main characters. I've mentioned this before in my Constructive Criticisms posts but none of the first responders have been promoted. How long are they going to remain in their same roles? For me, the show has lost something and I'm not sure a cruise disaster that puts Bobby and Athena in danger again for the umpteenth time is going to make people watch... but I digress.
I'm saddened because RG and GM the actors and the characters they play, Eddie and Chris have been sidelined and given minimal screentime for a while but the little amount they do get is always solid gold because both RG and GM are superb actors. They work very well together and I had hope for season 7 that they would finally be given the screentime they deserve especially since they barely got any in seasons 5 and 6 but it looks like another wash, rinse and repeat season with Buck still looking for answers (which I figured would be the case after I completed a post about his attire in the still of him and Chris). I was really hoping it wasn't going to be another season 4 with Eddie and Chris suffering with another recurring character (all they did was replace AF with M) while they wait for Buck to finally "get it" but apparently some people think it's fun and cute for Buck to be in the words of OS, "stuck on a hamster wheel" but I don't and honestly, unless he's headed for a massive breakdown SO he can finally DEAL AND COPE with all his issues, they can keep it.
The comment TM made about RG being pretty was just... 🙄. IMO, it was disrespectful, disgusting, disingenuous and completely discrediting. If it's true and he was initially hired for his looks for whatever reason, shouldn't they be past that by now? It's been six years and RG has proven time and time again that he's a fantastic actor. For those who forgot, EDDIE carried the ENTIRETY OF SEASON 5 on his back while KR was stumbling around as showrunner with most of the "top billed" cast (that's two-thirds of those who are paid the most) out of pocket. AB was working on A LOT of other projects and that's no hate to her but it's true, JLH was on maternity leave, RD and MR left the show and instead of giving more screentime to Eddie, Bobby and Chimney, they forced TK into the spotlight just to show how bad she was for Buck. They could have done that in episode 1 without giving her a back story so they could have dedicated more time to Eddie’s PTSD and therapy. Buck got two whole seasons and he still hasn't figured anything out but they rushed Eddie’s story and wouldn't even let him say he was going back to the 118🤔.
How many times will the audience have to watch these repetitive storylines? Also, how many times will RG, AH, GM, KC, CM and PK be sidelined for the other mains? It's supposed to be an ensemble cast but someone keeps forgetting that and pushing certain characters out front while they push the others to the side. In season 5, Chimney was sent on a road trip to drive across America with a 6-month-old instead of him staying in L.A. so Buck and Albert could help him with Jee-Yun. In season 6, Bobby was given a sponsor (Wendell) no one had ever heard of before and he appeared out of thin air. Hen's medical school storyline went absolutely nowhere and May disappeared after 6x11. And Eddie and Chris were once again sidelined and then pushed into another "Eddie has to date" because "Chris needs a mother" storyline with another bland and ridiculous recurring character because they keep dragging out whatever the "F" they're doing.
Now with the comment about RG being "too pretty to die", it made me wonder if Eddie and Chris being left out of the promos was a mistake after all🤷‍♀️.
I hope RG and GM can find a show that will appreciate their contributions and give them the screentime they deserve and it be based on how great they are as actors because they deserve so much better.
Anyway, this got longer than I expected and I didn't mean for it to but I'm disappointed in how they're treated and I'm tired of watching the same ole same old.
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aspecpplarebeautiful · 4 months
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Maybe this is silly but it's kinda been hitting me trying to date again on the arospec that I. Hate going on the first date or two and knowing so much that they like me way more than I like them. That I'll explain what I do not like in a relationship, and they'll say they don't mind, but I know deep down they're gonna say that so I don't leave but they really do hope they can change my mind or they're gonna be the magic someone that I Do enjoy kissing and full blown snuggling with. I do enjoy a few aspects of "romance", however a lot of the traditional appeal (kissing, cuddling, etc.) Is... very much lost on me. I don't even mind small kisses in passing, but making out is a fucking nightmare that everyone but a handful of people like me seem to think is the holy grail of life. It just sucks, I don't get it at all. I only recently came to terms with being on the aro spectrum. Does anyone have any advice for this kind of thing? Or tbh, AITA for trying to date when i know there's a solid chance I may be setting someone up for heartbreak?
Im sorry is this is a lot, just sort of confused and concerned, yknow?
You're not the asshole, you're being clear and honest about what you're looking for and the people you've tried to date aren't listening. There's this pervasive messaging in a lot of fictional romance story-lines that if a person is non-normative in some way they're actually not and just need to meet the Right Person TM*. (very often being ace or aro spectrum ways, but you also see it with other kinds of unconventional relationships, polyamory, not wanting kids, a woman who wants to focus on her career, etc, etc.), and some people seem to really internalize this messaging.
Not everyone is like that, and a lot of people will take you at your word when you explain what you're actually interested in/looking for or not, but it can be demoralizing when you run into this multiple times in a row.
My advice would be to do your best to be clear, and be firm, and hope you're getting through to the other person. Don't feel like you're nagging if you have to have this conversation more than once, some people need a bit of time for this kind of thing to sink in.
One thing you might want to consider or look into is QPRs (also called queerplatonic relationships, quirkyplatonic relationships or quasiplatonic relationships), a QPR can be any relationship that doesn't fit into a typical friendship or romance, (so a relationship with some romance, but not a full romantic relationship could be classified as a QPR), and QPRs are all about tailoring the relationship to the people in them, so you can pick and choose what you want to do or not do. People you're interested in having a relationship with may have an easier time getting their head around the idea of a relationship where you're interested in some things but not other things when framed this way.
I'll throw this out to followers too, has anyone else dealt with similar issues who have their own advice or experiences they want to share? Please do!
All the best and good luck, Anon!
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linkspooky · 11 months
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I’m a bit curious, since I saw the post about how you think the 1st year Tokyo kids aren’t that close as a trio. It made me wonder if you think the same think with the 2nd year’s bond. Do you also don’t really see them as a close group?
If there are a group of Tokyo Kids that could qualify as Nakama, it would definitely be the second years. However, I'd like to clarify I don't think they're all one big friend group. For example. I don't think Maki would hang out with Inumaki, or Panda alone the same way she might for Nobara or Yuta.
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The 2nd years are a group of friends with Yuta at the center, because Yuta's entire character revolves around his desire to connect with other people.
His arc in Jujutsu Kaisen zero where he is the main character, is basically him spending time with Inumaki and Maki characters who both seem inapproachable for different reasons and then learning about and connecting with them.
His connection with Maki is the most obvious. I ship it of course, but even if you don't view them in a romantic life Maki is the character who challenges Yuta all throughout Jujutsu Kaisen Zero and changes him. It begins with Maki calling out Yuta's self-centeredness in a deserved way. That's how he starts the manga, he's alone because of Rika, but he's used Rika as a convenient excuse too to not try to improve his situation or go out and make friends. He doesn't want to fix the problem, he starts out by saying he wants to commit suicide but decides not to because he's so lonely.
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The way for Yuta to overcome his self-centeredness is obviously to make an attempt to connect to the people around him. Which is where his relatioship with Maki is so important, because Maki is two things number one downright hostile to Yuta at first making it difficult to connect and number two she's also a victim of her family.
The fact that Yuta comes to learn about Maki's family circumstances and sympathize with her is important for his character, because he's no longer playing the victim TM. He's done the mature thing and realized there are other people besides him suffering and he can reach out a hand to help them. Which takes strength to do rather than just dwelling in your own problems.
He starts out basically afraid of Maki, and existing as the kind of kid who would get easily bullied by her if they were just normal high school students, but when Maki screams her criticism at him in his face and challenges him to be better, he actually listens.
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At that point for the rest of the manga he's actually trying to meet Maki halfway. He trains with her in kendo even if he ends up losing almost every single time. He starts working towards a goal, even if that goal is basically just being someone who is as strong as Maki and can fight alongside her.
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Which like I said, Yuta's central motivation is his desire to connect with others which is why he makes an effort to actually be friends with his classmates rather than workplace associates. He's actually seeking that kind of validation from Maki because he admires her and wants to be like her.
However, Maki and Yuta's relationship is far less one-sided and parasitic like it is for Rika and Yuta. As a result of his hard work over the course of the manga, Yuta makes progress in his relationship with Maki and actually gives something back to her. He is the first one really to point out her good points, after Maki has been belittled by her clan her entire life.
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Maki's greatest character flaw is her insistence on doing everything alone, it's even why she snaps at Yuta after this. It's such a serious flaw she neglects to repair her relationship with Mai until it's already too late. However, Yuta is someone who wants to make the effort to connect with Maki in the world of sorcery where eople don't really go out of their way to connect.
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While Yuta and Maki's relatioship has much less focus in the manga proper, when he returns post culling games they're basically always drawn as a set together. They always stand right next to each other, they talk like equal partners, Yuta is the only person to check if Maki is okay after receiving third degree burns all over her body and Maki recognizes Yuta is as strong as Hakari.
Then there's Yuta's relationship with Inumaki which gets far less screentime than Maki, but goes through a similiar arc to the one that Yuta does. Inumaki is also presented to the audience as someone unfriendly that Yuta has a hard time understanding.
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In Inumaki's case he can't really talk and explain himself to Yuta, because his curse technique makes it so if he's not careful with his speech he could horribly hurt someone. Inumaki's difficulty in controlling his cusred technique which renders him sort of mute couples with Yuta's misunderstanding of him as someone intimidating and scary.
During their fight, Yuta is continually supported by Inumaki who shows his concern for people in actions rather than words. THis is once again a case where Yuta has to step outside his own head and try to understand someone else.
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It's also an example just like Maki where Yuta realizes that other people in life have it hard besides him. Inumaki is struggling with a difficult to control curse technique that might curse someone by accident if he's not careful. Yuta's moment of change is realizing how hard Inumaki's life is, and how kind and considerate towards other people he is because he doesn't want them to get hurt.
You could even say he compares to Yuta, they both have cursed techiques that could accidentally hurt people (if I remember correctly it's implied Inumaki has hurt someone in the past) but Inumaki goes to great lengtsh to control his technique whereas at the start of the manga Yuta tends to just let Rika rampage and act like he's not in control. When they meet Yuta is in the process learning how to control Rika, and his desire to help Inumaki and repay his kindness motivates him to work harder.
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Yuta is a character that revolves around relatioships, he does everything for the sake of his friends, all of his character development comes from those friends. He doesn't even know anything about Yuji, but he goes out of his way to protect him because Yuji is someone important to Inumaki.
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His goal is to defeat Kenjaku single handedly because he doesn't want Gojo to have to kill the body of his best friend again. Panda himself when talking with Mechamaru even says that the reason he's interested in people and wants to learn more about them is because he met Yuta who he finds to be strange but admires in a way.
Yuta is someone who goes out of his way to make the connections that sorcerers don't usually make and this is also pointed out as being something that makes Yuta soft and unable to reach his true potential of be a calamity like Sukuna.
Which is why I'm confident in saying unlike the first years who are all strong individualists who are basically trying to be as strong as Gojo, the 2nd years are more of a friend group because Yuta is there and treats them all like friends.
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