On EP 2x03
So yeah, that wasn't my favorite episode of the season so far, but not bad. And I laughed my head off at the flashback at the beginning when Armand was telling Daniel about his "relationship" with Lestat. Really, I could not stop laughing during almost that whole thing. And yes, that very much does come from me having read the books and so knowing how that all really went down.
Seriously though, when Armand and Lestat started kissing in that balcony box -- with Nicki shooting them death glares as he played his violin! --I was doubled over in laughter! 🤣
Oh Armand, you so wish that was how it all happened. I'm not even mad he lied about almost all of that because his unrequited love/desire for Lestat does tend to make Armand act kind of pathetic.
But yeah, a nice story you told Daniel there, and clearly have told Louis at some point as well. I mean, it's not like there is anyone around to contradict you or call BS on any of it is there? 😏
Claudia, dear . . . when you heard that line about children can never be made vampires . . . are you now beginning to see the danger for yourself? After having missed the danger signs last week? Especially after they gave you that little baby dress. Although, maybe you think not being a child but a young teen excuses you, since they didn't kill you on sight. But there is for sure disillusionment settling in isn't there? Especially when they gave you that baby dress.
Louis . . . oh Louis. You pretty much are headed toward where your book counterpart ended up wrt Armand next episode, I suspect. (And yeah I knew he was actually killing a human when he started beating Dreamstat's head against that wall).
Daniel, Raglan James, and the Talamasca intrigued me the most wrt this episode Yes, I actually paused the screen and tried to read the names on the files James sent to him. Right now I most want to know if James is still in the Talamasca or if they've already kicked him out.
All in all, this episode was mostly set up for things coming in the next three episodes, leading into the final two. And I'm glad Assad had already let slip that Armand's full backstory would come in a later season during the press tour, or I might have gone into this episode with different expectations about the opening flashback. Because Armand's true, and full, backstory is much weightier than what we saw here, even with the glimpse at the Children of Darkness stuff. (And I'm so glad they called it the Children of Darkness -- its original name in the books -- in the show btw. I'm sorry, I think the Children of Satan name would have been a bit too camp.)
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sorry i feel bad for ranting on """Main"" i guess though i kinda keep this more of apersonal blog than a very polished art blog thing. under the cut
things wld be easier if i was just an oc-centric artist (which i kinda am but only to myself in my head) but it Is how it is at this point (i want to draw my ocs more but they never turn out the way i want) and theres just so much i want to draw for the silly little media franchises that happen to capture my stupid little heart and etc.
ahhhhhhhhhhhh ifeel stupid for loving too much or whatever. i dont want to throw a pity party over this either because in the end its just "who cares LOVE WHAT U LOVE DRAW WHAT U WANT" right but in the moment i feel stupid and it sucks and i hate it actually!!!!!!! and i WILL in fact keep drawing hwat i want and what makes me happy but like idkidkdidkgkhw
sometimes i cant help thinking if i was a better artist.,, like more artistically skilled........ would people really say the things they do about the things i draw
^ (Authors note: no one has been mean about the stuff i draw just. side comments i guess lol. from my friends though and not random people . so its harder to just brush off i guess)
like maybe im just not good enough yet. which is fine. spite is actually a really good drawing proponent. but its also just like . when will it be enough to be worth it? will it be worth being my friend now if im a good artist? if i draw what you want? ...........................
its obviously not discounting the people who really enjoy my art style adn what i draw regardless (which im soooo so grateful for bc i never like expect anyone to stick around sicne my fixations change like the wind) but its like... these r the people i spend the most time with . and it sucks. i have to. second guess what i say and what i type and just. ok like i know its not that serious either but i hate it i really dont like it (<- im also just socially anxious if u cant tell)
and its also like i cant just extract myself from my friend group for a while to kinda cool off (read: muster the courage to be an idiot in front of them again) bc ummmmm um i dont have many friends . they are kind of all i got. (which is nice i like small circles(?) im not good at opening up to people.) and i do admire and like them very much but then i just feel like i get bit in the ass all the time (This past month) with shit like this i guess
and honestly like. well half the reason i keep switching fixations is BECAUSE of stuff like this where i feel self conscious of """"Being obsessed"""" over One thing so much so i just immediately switch tracks so fast but its just a cycle (Which i dont see as a bad thing tbh? it keeps my art moving and things fresh so like.)
And honestly i dont really try to . be too vocal about. fandom? stuff? when im with my friends? unless they bring it up first? i got burnt so many times with my vtuber interests so like lol ive Learned. but maybe it slips out too much? bruh. my bad i guess
i have to stop thinking abt this man.., why has this happened to me so many times this past month lol its kind of ridiculous
(Im sure they dont like. mean it. right? ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, if they actually meant it and want me to shut up then they should just actually say so right.,
i just want to draw . its not going to stop me from drawing but damn does it really like rain on my parade or put a dent in my fender or whatever other sayings that i cant think of right now
in the end i really REALLY appreciate frm the very very bottom of my heart everyone that even remotely likes/appreciates my art (especially the persona stuff nowadays bc thats what im mainly pouring all my mental and physical and emotional into) like i really really mean it. because this stuff like my silly comics and stuff is really stuff i make for purely my own heart and just what i want to see kinda. and so it just makes me feel really warm that people also want to see it and keep seeing it and love it and everything like that. and, with all this kind of negative stuff going on i just go back and reread tags and comments and stuff and i feel encouraged to keep going and draw more and everything like that. so like really, truly, thank you. i really never thought so many people would like the stuff i make. even if its not really artistically good, or really deeply interesting, im really happy it could be something special to people out there
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Horizon | Prologue
"so... I've been meaning to tell you something”
The summer breeze was cool. A pleasant and welcoming feeling, as the day was still hot and humid, despite the sun going down. The lights of the city's skyline begun to bloom, like a line of tall Christmas trees in the distance. The bench they sat on still containing their names they etched-in when they found this spot in highschool, several miles from downtown off the coast of the lake that kissed the cities borders. This was their favourite spot. To hangout. To think. To reflect. To celebrate. To cry. It was one of the only consistent things that they both had throughout their lives.
"Uh huh..."
"I... know I've been gone for some time-"
"You think?"
"...and I know I have a lot of explaining to do"
"Oh really?"
"Look... it's easier if I just... show you"
With an unsteady motion, they lifted the sleeve of their hoody to the elbow, exposing their forearm, and held it out in front of them. And just like that, their skin started to glow. From the fingertips, down the back of their hand, down the wrists, slowly encroaching on the entire arm. The glow contrasting the blackness of their skin, like embers on coal, with a deep yellow-white light, a light many would describe as holy. The pupils and sclera of their eyes enveloped with the same holy light. They looked over to their friend to see them with their hand covering their eyes. The glow dimmed, then stopped all together, returning their skin and eyes to normal.
"Oh. My bad. Should've warned you..."
Silence. Only several seconds or so, but feeling like minutes in the moment. Their friend slowly lowering their hand, revealing a puzzled, yet curious, deeply scared, yet deeply amazed, mouth a little open kind of look on their face. It was hard to tell what they were thinking.
"What just..."
"Yea."
More silence.
"So this was what you were up to?"
"Heh. 'Up to' is one way of putting it"
Their friend then swiftly adjusting their position, turning to directly face them, with their legs crossed in their lap, the expression on their face suddenly becoming stern and serious.
"Everything. Now."
"Right."
And so, they gave them everything, from the last time they spoke. From the inconsistent eating habits, to the overall deterioration of their mental state. From the uneventful days, to yet another melancholic, sleepless night. From the streak of light that suddenly appeared from the sky and seemingly landing in their backyard. To them going to investigate and being greeted by a sphere of light that "just.... floated there". From them pacing back and forth wondering what they should do, "should I touch it?", to them actually touching it. From them describing an experience that would be akin to the likes of hell. The pain that felt like they were being separated cell by cell, atom by atom. Head, body, and limbs contorting to inhuman positions. Head twisting 180 degrees like an owl, ribs protruding and bending in different directions, but somehow not piercing the skin. Limbs bent backwards, sideways, in and out. Feeling so hot like they were being thrown into the face of the sun, yet feeling so cold like they were being submerged in the waters of Antarctica. Not being able to see anything but an empty vast white space of nothing. Wanting to scream the entire time but physically not being able to. From them waking up in the backyard to the morning sun on their face, their skin feeling all tingly. To them thinking if all of that was some bizarre dream, "maybe I started sleep walking or something I don't know". From them beginning to notice strange phenomena, like their light bulb that died and yet still turned on in their hands when they picked it up. To them being freaked out when their vision in the dark seemed to be clear as day when they focused hard enough.
"So that's what it is. Light, right? That's the power you possess?"
"Maybe. I think. Or perhaps energy"
"Energy.... Energy."
Their friend hanging on that word. Slowly saying it over and over to themselves, possibly savouring how that sounds, or thinking of the endless possibilities this power could hold.
"Also think I can't die"
"Wait, what?"
"Yea."
"But... wait... how would you kn-..."
Silence. Letting out a big sigh, they slumped over the bench and put their head in their hand, rubbing their temple with their forefingers and thumb. Their friend placing a hand on their back, gently rubbing it back and forth.
"Hun, why?"
"Just..."
Their head still in their hand, shaking it back and forth now,
"I.. didn't mention the voice"
"Voice?"
"Yea, as I was being skinned and turned inside out. I... wasn't sure if I was hearing it right. I couldn't see anything, that's for sure. It was just... this big empty room... a space... I don't know, a void of just pure whiteness. Stretching as far as I could see. And there was this... voice. It sounded like... I don't know, an alien trying to communicate in English. Like a bunch of incoherent words and syllables mish-mashed together, but if I paid enough attention I could make some sense of it ya know? And then, very clearly, I heard the voice say three things: convert. nine nine. survive."
"Convert, ninety nine, survive..."
"Yea. After I woke up, I was so confused and out of it I didn't think too much of it. But the more I thought about it, about all that happened, those words... the pain. Oh god. The pain. I cannot even begin to describe to you how it felt. God just. The pain. And then I started to think, is this what the voice meant? I'd have to survive this pain again at some point in time? Would it happen more than once? And just. God. I couldn't do that again. I can't do that again. So I just..."
Another sigh. Tears began swelling in their eyes. As they went to wipe them from their face, their friend pulled them in for a hug, using the palm of their hand to wipe the tears away
"Oh, hun."
That warmth. That sensual, intoxicating, tender warmth. The warmth that enveloped you and made you feel safe. The warmth that excited every sense, the warmth you couldn't just feel, but also hear, smell, taste, see. The warmth that many have lost themselves to just for the sake of experiencing it for just a moment. Love. It has been so long since they felt it.
"I'm... sorry I didn't keep in touch with you. I just didn't want you to see me like this. To hear all of this"
"Are you kidding? At the end of the day, my only concern was that you were okay. And like.. My best friend is a fucking superhero. With fucking super powers. Why wouldn't I want to hear about that?"
"Superhero?"
"Yea, what else would you do with all that going on? Be an accountant?"
They let out a laugh from the gut "Yea, maybe. Who knows? I could save the world from potential tax fraud"
"Well you're in luck cuz theres no shortage of fake bitches out here"
They lost themselves amongst the banter and the laughter, the sun finally laying itself to rest in the midst of it all. It was now dark, and being a little ways away from the nearest path with street lights, it was getting hard to see. The holy light once again enveloped their hand
"Come, I'll lead us back"
"Aww see, look at you using your powers for good already"
They couldn't help but crack a smile "Oh stop."
They headed back through the creek that leads to their special little spot, a trodden dirt path that was made overtime by other fellow adventurers trying to take a shortcut to the shore nearby. The cool summer breeze died down, replaced by the symphony of the night. The cacophony of crickets, the soothing rhythm of the stream, the percussion of the tree branches rustling above. It was oddly silent, though, between the two of them. They looked over to their friend, their friend's brows furrowed, face now deep in concentration, staring off into space as if they're looking for something in the air. Their eyes darting back and forth, clearly putting two and two together. About what, exactly?
"Hey, so.."
"What is it?"
"You said you don't die. So like, meaning you're immortal?"
"I... guess so, huh"
"But like... survive. What could an immortal possibly have to survive? You're immortal"
Both of them stopped in their tracks, looking at each other, waiting for the other to give a possible answer.
"So you get it, huh. It's what been at the back of my mind since I came to in my backyard. Though, If it's anything like the pain I had to endure I...I don't know what I might do"
Their friend, not being able to think of an answer either, shook their head and sighed. They continued on.
"Well, I don't know what it possibly could be, or what will happen next, but knowing that someone like you was chosen for this power makes me feel much safer already"
"Really?"
"Of course. Could you imagine anybody else getting this power? The world would be more fucked than we already are"
"Huh... guess you could be right"
"Oh please, you know I am. Just, whatever does happen, make sure you saving my ass first, okay?"
They chuckled, "Of course"
They smiled back, "You know, despite it all, something tells me there's so much good waiting for you over the
Horizon."
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oh my god thats so sweet of you!!!! thank you :DD also super sorry for deleting your ask btw
To get down to business well uh iterators huh, so I can tell you have read some of my ramblings before (very fun) and I will say in general I stand by those ideas - model differences and stuff - with some smaller changes here and there, for instance I made pebbles antennas stupidly long cause I think it looks funny - plus tons of tiny refinements, but generally I dont have too much to add unless theres something specific your wondering about - so I wont focus to much on that. Instead I'm gonna chat a bit about the other stuff you mentioned (NSH and wire headwear) ^-^ so heres the guys! (I'm gonna expand a bit on their design designs)
Ok so you have actully managed to point out something I really hoped no one would notice, which is that I never draw No Significant Harrasment (NSH) - who I hope you meant when you asked about sig, if not then dont look at me - and that is because I despise him with my whole heart. Or well, his design, the character is fine but I cannot draw this guy, I hate his colour scheme and his stupid little cape and why is his head symbols green on green - who allowed this - and in general we are not friends, which is a pity because I have alot of headcanons about him. But as you can see above I have semi settled on a design for him (note the semi, I am not super happy about it) and I do have some toughts and explanations.
So first of, I put NSH as being from the same model generation as suns - so predecessing moon and pebs by a bit - with older designs that have a larger focus on "religious stuff" combined with the anchients overall bonkers fashion sense - more is more - if you wanna read more about that its in this post about suns.
- I would also, this is a side note btw, like to mention I think having them being older models gives room to have some key differences between the oldies (NSH and suns) and the youngsters-ish (moon and pebs) in that one, they have older machinery and also early machinery which means both rougher quality and more wear and tear - which I like to think give them both the idea of slugcats as messangers earlier than most, as they knew their easily damaged functions (broadcast masts for example) would not last forever, which gives them a reason to want to solve it (by breeding scugs I guess) and added onto that I - and this is pure headcanon and speculation - like to imagine a lot of the "taboos" that pebbles and moon have - or well that I speculate they have, the no killing yourself or harming citizens taboo is confirmed canon, but I dont think its farfetched to asume they have other restrictions programmed - something that would most likely be added in later modles, but would be absent in the earlier ones like suns and NSH (not the earliest models but early) which theoreticly would give them a bit more leeway and "creative freedom", which ok why am I talking about this back to why NSH looks like that. -
Back to that, so suns and NSH will share design similarities: lack of face (to represent a lack of ego), lots of robes and layers, which leads us into the slightly more relevant sidenote of iterator clotheing:
So fashion comes and goes in cycles, your mom rebeled against her grandmothers clothing choises and is horrified when that fashion comes back via her daughter who think it looks cool again (20 year old rule or whatever) and that also applies to iterator design (look at that old suns ask for more info on this). So while I have talked about general trends a little, now I wanna talk about waistlines - in robes, because I have wanted an exscuse to talk about it, I be brief promise!
: so like you probably havent noticed all my iterators have different waistlines, or at least the ones from different generations - ignore moon, I'm a no robe for moon beliver, I like to draw joints and wires to much to give her robes - and I will sadly report I have not looked to closely at actual anchient fashion for the choises I made, but well cant have everything. So the most notable is probably pebbles, where I, ok Imostly fell for temptation of a modern highwaist cut, which while moslty being about my own tatse, also is an atempt to convey some form of "modernity" because while its a bright orange robe on a robot, it has a similar cut to highwaisted jeans. Which gives the silhoute from a couple years ago with a big bulky upper body and stick legs. But pebbles isnt intresting in that way, no its because every other design is a resistence against that.
And this again leads into the cycles of fashion. Because we know iterators were built under many cycles - however long those are - so we can asume it will be kinda like how fashion has changed from the 11th centrury to now. Which gives to reason that iterators have been dressed differently too. This added with that - from what I understood - different iterator cities (colonies) had different cultures (boradcast, red, in sky islands) all this then makes me kinda figure that the iterators should have different robes. Yes that was a long winded way to say that characters look different.
So back to waistlines and how their all anti pebbles robes - the most notable difference is of course suns, who has no waistline. They are not only without to create a bigger difference between them and pebbles, but to also lean a bit on - and this might not be the same for every culture - but on the general idea that older clothes were more "modest" or in this case, there are more layers and any hints of there being a body under there is desperatly covered. and that "modern clothes" have less layers and have show more skin - not that pebble is showing skin, but hes wearing one robe instead of seven. So with that the idea that suns is older is conveyed a little bit at least, and the same then applies to NSH. NSH while also having lots of layers, is different from suns by having an empire waistline, mostly because I think their cute and need them to look different, but also to give a hint that they have different city fashion cultures and also because when I see empire waists i think old paintins and old paintings=old.
-also while I'm on the subject of cultural differences between iterator facilities. Can we talk about how we only really get to see anchient society as its presented in moon and pebbles (shared?) facility. So really its very possible the whole aestetic is complelty different like five local groups away. Food for thought. -
So faceless and robe-rich is a similarity between suns and NSH, and I could mention many more, but I'm gonna restrain myself and only talk about headphones. As you can tell I - and most fanartist here - like to draw their antennas differently for all of them! which is also canon, but I also ignored canon so were gonna talk about it. Mostly the antennas give room for some fun mini details, like how moons look like wings or fins while suns are just sunbeams.
Anyhow so most people make NSH bald, me included, mostly because the super cool official art of him gives him no antennas (sad). I asume that means he works via bluetooth.
(I was about to start speculating about their headphones but that got to boring even for me so sorry if your super intrested in why iterators probably have headphones)
But I had a ulterior motive with bringing up the headphones - and not only to be able to point out moons antenna, which I delight in drawing - but also so that I can transition into the second part of this way to long response! itertors hairdos... wire-dos? basicly this \/
(im reusing my wip because these are a pain to draw so we use what we have - I coloured them in a bit for better oversight.)
(also I was gonna start talking about if iterators would actully do personalisations like this - as we can argue about if they concepulize themself as their puppets and see a meaning to decorating them - I would argue yes but also its complicated- and also explain how iterators have different prefernces, which I realised most people probably already asume so I didnt need to explain that - anyhow so that got to long so I'm not gonna get into it. Instead were gonna go into this section with the assumptions that they do fun things with their wires. and also that the wires connect to their nape and backhead instead of their back or spine.)
So to me th biggest thing to remember when we talk about potetial wire headwear is that:
- iterators live 24/7 without gravity and because of that cannot be bothered by to heavy headwear, therefore theres rooms for them and anchients (and me) to get funky with it without having to concider gravity.
-anchients wore absurdly many decorations - and while giving iterators flashy decorations does take away from my earlier statement that they were based on more humble monk stuff, we are going to asume they used the fancy headwear for cermonies and festivals (which we also know anchients did) and that it was used for showcasing and fun. If some iterators preffered to keep them afterwards is another query.
So with that in mind lets break these headwear thingies down!! :D
so as you can (hopefully) tell there three components in the headwear. The headphones that are different depending on iterator and are not removable (or as unremovable a computer part can be). Then theres the actual headpieces that keeps the wires togheter. These can be switched out and changed depending on whats preffered - also I drew them in gold but any material works, if were being closer to canon they would probably be made of some purposed organism and maybe be neon pink - theres also pearls dangling from them because its a perfect opertunity. Third theres probably the part I think is the most fun which is the actual wires. They obviously go through the headpieces and then are set free via wiretassles (that also comes in different forms) and after that is where my own speculations about wires comes in. Which is really simple in that iterators can most probably move the wires at will - they can control their arm thing, pearls and other objects in their chambers, reasonably they can move the wires - and I think its fun if different iterators move them differently. Like suns keeps them straight and neat, or pebbles moves them in syncronized formations or moon who just lets them hang, so many oppertunities ok ( you can see the general idea in the drawing). The wires then connect to their movement arms and connect to the mainframe.
And thats kinda about it? I dont have like anything super intresting to say about just the hairdos other than that I think its very fun and also that everyone is sleeping on wire customizations I am obbsessed with the idea send help.
Ok I think I'm done chatting!! Hope your still here and that this wasnt insufferable to read. Uh, thanks for the ask :D
(NSH for your enjoyment)
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okay, im gonna say something and i dont know if itll make sense to anyone but me but. us finally getting to see angel crowley as compared to current crowley... it reminds me of trauma
i mean, angel crowley was so expressive and full of joy and life, like nothing could go wrong!
and current crowley is stoic, sarcastic, jaded. its hard to believe theyre the same person, though even that part is up to debate depending on what you think about crowleys memories
and it makes me think of me and others ive known whove gone through stuff and how much it changes you as a person, and it makes me wonder just what the fall was like. i mean, at the very least it was an utter betrayal and terrifying, right? life changing, most of all to someone like crowley whos only """wrongdoing""" was asking questions, and not even bad ones.
i dont really have a point, im just sad. like, obviously we all love crowley in any form and such but its like... wow, he used to be so beyond happy and now a real smile from him is rare, and universe knows he likely will never smile the same way he used to ever again. all of this for asking questions.
plus like, the way that he just keeps getting reminded of it in every single way, especially the way that people from above and below wont just leave him alone to live his life.
it also makes me think of that whole last thing with him and zira. he didnt want the fate of a demon but sure as hell he isnt going to return to being an angel after what they did to him. i wonder if aziraphale even knows what it was like. has he ever asked? would crowley even actually answer?
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