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skyeventide · 3 years

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I’m really really fascinated by your interpretation of Maedhros and I’d love to read more of it, I saw your comment on the post about earlier versions and then was super intrigued

-@outofangband

hello @outofangband ! thank you for the ask, I'm going to try putting it into words, though I'm usually much better at fanfiction to explain how I envision characterisation — and unfortunately I don't have any Maedhros fanfic other than To die in the light (which is less about him per se, and more about the ex thrall who interacts with him; but there's a good swathe of Maedhros as well). still, to explain:

essentially, what I meant with that specific comment is that I don't attribute to Maedhros any personal unwillingness to follow along the rebellion, the first kinslaying, or the Oath, certainly not at early stages. what I instead attribute to Maedhros is an aptitude for politics and a willingness to attempt diplomacy routes and handle public perceptions of facts, no matter how facts actually are.

a lot of this is, by necessity, extrapolation. the bare bones of characterisation are there in the text, but the flesh that is built on those bones varies, and can vary a lot. so mypersonal construction is informed by a few external things too. I basically just... don't really vibe with restrained good person Maedhros, cause that feels to me like the easiest route to construct a narrative that's contrasting, depending: his father's; his brothers'; sometimes other characters' (e.g. Elwing). and like, to each their own, but it's not my thing, and I'm not into singling out the good guy out of the bunch as a trope, it simply doesn't call to me.

I'll try to explain my points about early Maedhros (much as I'd love to explain my headcanons for the whole character arc, that would be so long and complicated that I give up without even trying lmao); also I'd like to add that absence of evidence is not evidence of absence but that's where both "personal construction" and "extrapolation" come into place. essentially, this is what I construct and extrapolate, and I'm not really interested in alternatives, I don't like them, or I just disagree with them. and by contrast, people may think the same of this.

firstly, not against the rebellion and the Oath: the early text in @undercat-overdog's post is to my knowledge the only existing text that gives insight with regard to the state of mind with which the Oath was taken. now the Silmarillion says "a dreadful oath", but the Silmarillion has reason to do so by virtue of hindsight. the entirety of the speech to the Noldor, fear and gloom of the moment aside, is a speech that pushes to action: it seems extremely fitting to me that the taking of the Oath itself should reasonably be something with an upwards push, taken without full acknowledgement of its lines and what they may entail when it comes to other elves. because the stated purpose of moving war to Morgoth is very clear throughout, and even though the reality of the war hasn't hit them yet, the awareness of its approach is very present — there is, imo, a readiness for fight and an acknowledgement of intent: killing a deity.

I also feel that "these leapt with laughter / their lord beside / with linked hands / there lightly took / the oath unbreakable" meshes fairly well with the Silmarillion version, where some of this is not kept but the sons still leap at Feanor's side, this time with their swords drawn. Maedhros in this is not called out as any different — in fact, Maedhros is not called out as being different during the feud either: "lies came between them" with regard to Fingon paints the rumour-spreading among the Noldorin factions as affecting them equally, just as it affects Fingolfin ("grew proud and jealous each of his rights and possessions").

the first kinslaying: again maedhros is not singled out as against it. and again, absence of evidence doesn't equal evidence of absence, however, my preferred method in reconstructing my understanding of canon through the skeleton of its textuality is at times trying to make sense of drafts and grabbing the fil rouge of their logical development. and, when there is someone called out as acting against the Noldor during the first kinslaying, that is Galadriel. Maedhros never even is named in this circumstance.

I also think that the modus operandi of the whole situation is a remarkable early calque of the second and third kinslaying. first, other options are exhausted first: the noldor go north, stop in Araman by foot, and decide the crossing of the ice is too costly, not doable, or otherwise not something they're willing to do (more: people directly blame Feanor for the bitter cold they're exposed to, before they have to cross, if they wish to reach Middle Earth); second, there is an attempt to convince Olwe and the Teleri via words; third, a passage that is textually absent from later deeds of the same sort, but which might be potentially inferred, the leader (here Feanor) sits alone brooding on his options; fourth, action. this is the same as what happens with the later kinslayings, even though the first was not meant to be a deadly undertaking in its conception (it was a theft). but, what I mean is, second kinslaying: failed first option, the battle of unnumbered tears, part 2 diplomatic attempt, the message to doriath, part 3, not textually stated, part 4, action. third kinslaying is muddier and I won't attempt to map it perfectly other than: delayed attack to the havens; diplomatic attempt via message; [not textually stated, may be incorporated in the delay]; action.

either way, my point is: whether Maedhros is outright leader or he isn't, there isn't any fundamental difference in the story beats of the kinslayings. inb4 "Feanor and Maedhros have different character traits" — yes, to an extent. and this is where the early draft from that post returns to my aid in terms of personality building: "the eldest, whose ardor / yet more eager burnt / than his father’s flame, / than Feanor’s wrath". now, I feel there's an important qualitative difference in ardour and wrath, but that line exists and the Silmarillion doesn't contradict it: the fire of life burns in Maedhros, the eagerness here mentioned does not fade from this draft to later versions. (inb4 “the circumstances don’t overlap perfectly”: yes of course they don’t. I’m not trying to argue that they do)

now, what happens when it's time to depart with the ships? Feanor takes counsel with his sons, and the decision is to take the loyalists and go to the other side with them first. what happens when Feanor tries to burn those ships? Maedhros gives his famous lines, "what ships and rowers will you spare to return, and whom shall they bear hither first". my extrapolation here is this: I think it's obvious that the burning was not supposed to happen; and I think it's obvious that the joint decision of Feanor and his sons, dare say of Feanor and his firstborn heir, was to send back a group and carry the rest of the Noldor to Middle Earth. Feanor says lmao fuck you and the rest is history. Maedhros doesn't take well to that, and here comes forth what I think actually distinguishes him as a character: the cool-headed pragmatism that will imo really come forth post-captivity, the diplomatic abilities, and weighing his options with a level-headedness that his father lacks — and I would like to posit, these options are not weighed in a particularly moral way: he appeals to Feanor about Fingon being carried first because Fingon rushed in and got involved in the kinslaying on their behalf (there may be different readings, but they don't appear to me as textually supported as this — and for the purpose of this I am making no difference between feelings of romance and friendship; the quality of the relationship is here irrelevant, the strength of it has more bearing). it isn't "Fingon because he's my friend", or "Fingon because he's a good guy", it's "Fingon because he killed for us". and after he is on this side, actually keeping the rest of their army, an army they need to effectively wage the war they said they would wage, becomes a cake walk.

also, I go back and forth on this, but: it's possible that Fingon gained his "the valiant" sobriquet before the Darkening; it isn't a given that it was gained in this instance, his Alqualonde attack. but I still feel like it's quite telling, whether the epithet is gained now or before, that it's brought up under these circumstances. the last "valiant" deed from Fingon has been saving the day during the kinslaying. whether Maedhros is saying it to convince his father or because he truly feels it's currently deserved, he's nonetheless saying it.

a last point is the envoy with which he accepts to meet with Morgoh's forces: this is very shortly after Feanor's death, and Maedhros goes in with more warriors than agreed, though it's still not enough to counter Morgoth's own breaking of the terms. Maedrhos in this demonstrates that he's willing to pursue diplomacy despite his father's own words, but he is neither blindly trusting nor a good person who's simply out of his depth: he goes prepared to be the larger armed force and brings none of his brothers with him. it's not enough, but the attempt is there.

which reads to me as an ardour and eagerness that are kept in check by pretty solid abilities to plan, and that do not, really, counter his father's wishes in any truly consistent way. yes, the ship burning, but in the long run having all the Noldor in ME was going to be a benefit; I feel he could have well patched-up the problems without giving up any crown. yes, the parleying with Morgoth, but they just lost their father and despite that the Dagor-nuin-Giliath is a victory: he's coming as the winning party and newly crowned king, and he might, perhaps, find another route to proceed.

so these are more or less the salient points of my personal reconstruction of "early Maedhros". it'd be too long to get into post-captivity and this post is already long lmao, but I hope this made sense to you? and clarified how I understand his character with that early draft included as an aspect.

*all opinions and analyses are personal and are not attempting to establish a true canon. they make sense to me; I’d argue that I try to make them as textually supported as possible with a canon so fragmented. if my readers’ here are different, go on y’all’s merry way.

#Maedhros #quenta noldorinwa #answered.#outofangband

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antimnemonic · 2 years

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ok i have more thots actually. so obvs we all know that movie sets from the 80s/90s were purposely cluttered and full of dressing; homes actually looked “lived in” and served to boost characterization — meanwhile modern movies are super sterile and minimalist.

anyways in the fly Seth’s apartment/base/lab/whatever starts out clean, organized, and minimalist — initially in contrast to then-contemporary set-building, but actually this set is also used to characterize seth. it mirrors his current state, going from clean and organized and progressing to semi-destroyed and full of garbage

and like all of that is obvious obvs but i think there’s some context lost in watching this today rather than in the 80s alongside other 80s movies. cuz like i don’t think that Seth’s apartment is necessarily a reflection of his true self, so much as his sheltered self. when we meet him he’s this weird guy who lives only for his work and thus doesn’t have any extraneous clutter in his life (he has like five sets of clothes lmao and sleeps on a pull-out) BUT thru his time w veronica we see that he has the capacity for like, illogical passion and clutter; he gets veronica a necklace and starts wearing other clothes

but while Seth’s apartment reflects his state and is allowed to disorganize, it never reaches that equilibrium of being cluttered and lived-in to express a character’s individuality like sets in other movies do— it just decays. so like imo it’s kind of like a metaphor for cut-short potential; the romance of a new relationship and like, the personality of a young guy just starting to find himself, being destroyed before it ever really has a chance to find its footing

#the fly #sorry this is discombobulated i got distracted and went looking at vids of eggmans announcements while trying to figure out #what i was trying to say

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bbq-hawks-wings · 4 years

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If your interested, I also mentioned that Apollo was the god of oracles and prophecy. And there was that prophecy about Endeavor bringing everyone's demise in the form of Dabi :) even if he wasn't mentioned by name, we know he's the 'darkness' Endeavor's light will summon. And to fit in with that more, Dabi killing Endeavor will erase him from the narrative, which is like the dreams he was having.

(Continued) If Dabi = Apollo, and to Apollo, Hawks were his messenger birds then hmm whatdya think? *nudge nudge* He! Knows! The! Thing! Horikoshi is probably mixing a lot of stories. Someone once wrote that Icarus fell all the way down to Tartarus, but I can't find any source for that. We know he drowned at sea, but is there anything written on what happened after in detail or is that it? I'd also like to mention, while we're on the topic of myths.

(Continuing) Hawks' eyes are similar to the eyes of Horus/Ra are they not? His eyes are a big deal in the manga, and Ra is known as 'The Hidden One' Now we know Hawks is always hiding himself behind his feathers, there's at least three specific panels of him doing that. The MOST INTERESTING part is that Ra has many names, and one is secret, because knowing that would mean having power over him. (Applies to Dabi too in a way tbh.) but! We're thinking of Keigo Takami here ;)

(Last part) And Dabi held the power over him when he shouted it out and made Hawks lose his cool there. Bonus: Horus lost his left eye in a war with Set, and Dabi's foot was on Hawks' left eye and burned it. - anon from Foxy's tags.

I am VERY interested in the extended/multiple myth angle, particularly in regards to Hawks, Foxy anon. (Thanks for dropping by to talk, btw.) I've read everything over that you've sent, and if it's okay, I'd like to review your thoughts and chime in at the end with my own. I'm going to do it under the cut, though, because this is going to get long. Lol

I absolutely agree with you that Dabi is likely either a front-runner or the main agent of darkness summoned by Endeavor's light. The concept of the prophecy was introduced in canon, and I don't doubt Horikoshi plans to explicitly bring it up again. Considering Dabi's supposed dark connections to Endeavor's past he's a prime candidate to knock Endeavor out of the sky. When you combine this with the fact that Dabi's hair is black while Touya's appears to be snow white with the character for "light" spelled out in his name, it's hard to believe Dabi won't have some major role to play in this prophecy. The thematic idea that Apollo/Touya, as this more symbolic role than anything, in the background gives Hawks this prophecy to pass on about the incoming darkness is also not unlikely.

I'm not so sure the Hawks = Horus-Ra angle tracks as cleanly, though. Still, I'll follow your thought process first and give it the benefit of the doubt when discussing it before adding my thoughts. I'll be referring to Horus and Ra as the same entity as from my cursory research they were occasionally combined into the same deity and both share some nominal similarities with Hawks. Please also note Egyptian mythology is not my strong suit, and it has its own complexities I'm unfamiliar with. I'm only working with what I know and can research on the surface.

The note about his eyes are fascinating considering the fact that the Eye of Horus and the Eye of Ra are both major, destinct parts of the Egyptian mythology as well as having their own separate symbolic meanings and power - The right Eye of Ra representing the sun and having associations with aggression and destruction while the left Eye of Horus, representing the moon, was associated with healing, sacrifice, protection and wisdom - even being referred to as "the all-seeing eye."

Yet as potentially rich and interesting this angle is, I'm not entirely sure it's close enough to canon to stick.

My first objection starts with his proposed equivalence to Ra who is considered king of the gods and creator of all things as well as the personification of the sun itself. Imo, this is just too lofty of a position to accurately attribute to Hawks. Despite losing the sweet "bird of prey" aesthetic, I think Thoth would probably be a better fit as the god of the moon and writing, particularly as he restores the Eye of Horus. There's also the issue of which eye is burned and the significance of them - seeing as Hawks' left eye was burned, which according to this theory would be the Eye of Horus, it would make more sense for this to read as Hawks losing his motivation to work for those more selfless, positive qualities that up to this point have defined his character and leave only the Eye of Ra, the more destructive and violent tendencies, to reign unless some other character embodying Thoth restored it for him.

This premise of the right and left eyes on its own is positively dope and has a Shonen series begging to be made of it. However, I find it too far removed from the proven inspiration of HeroAca so far to be much more than a neat thought exercise for our purposes today. At least for the moment it would make sense to stick closer to the Greco-Roman angle we have at the moment, especially considering how closely tied together Dabi, Endeavor, and Hawks canonically are. If the Icarus story is meant to be the case as well and we wanted to flesh out Hawks individually more, I could see an angle that keeps the bird motif as well as the consequences of Daedalus/Endeavor's hubris directly impacting him as well.

Nevertheless, with the Egyptian aspect set to the side for now and sticking to our speculation around the Icarus myth for the moment, I'd like to posit that if Horikoshi is actually intending to take the larger mythos around Daedalus to explain the dynamics of these characters Hawks will be playing the role of one or two myths outside of merely acting as Dabi/Icarus' tattered wings. It requires some creative liberties to work; but nothing I'd consider too outside the realm of reason to break it.

Long before the tower, and even the birth of Icarus himself, Daedalus had an apprentice - either Talos or Perdix depending on the source. This apprentice was brilliant - even more so than Daedalus himself - and looked up to him to emulate him in his admiration of him. Though in this myth Daedalus commits the upcoming crime himself out of jealousy of his apprentice, if we tweaked it to mean "due to Daedalus' jealousy, Talos/Perdix was pushed out of a tower to his demise" the angle still works depending on the direction the manga takes. Athena - goddess of wisdom, and interesting in the context of HeroAca, the clever, noble, and positive aspect of war - looked on Talos/Perdix with favor and before he could be killed by the fall was transformed into a partridge who, remembering his past life, never soared or climbed to high places again and only nests close to the ground.

Like the other roles it's a stretch, and we really don't have enough canon material to work with to prove it either way, but a couple of notes in particular gives this theory enough merit for me to keep tucked in the back of my head as we go on.

A more direct, cause and effect relationship with Endeavor should he actually be playing the role of Daedalus.

The specific note of admiration and subsequent betrayal leading to the younger's downfall due to the previously unknown envy of the older.

If this myth pertains to events that have already happened in the manga (i.e. the fall of Talos/Perdix was Hawks' "adoption" by the HPSC) the low-dwelling partridge transformation fits not only because of Hawks' humble and wary nature but because of the symbolic blessing of Athena in particular being the catalyst for the change.

If this is meant to be indicative of events that will happen in the future (Hawks' burned wings, the epiphany about Endeavor, etc) it still works whether Hawks gets his wings back or not. In the case he doesn't he will be a grounded bird, though far from useless and still radiant; and if he does it leaves open the opportunity to squeeze in another myth - that of the Phoenix - instead of the partridge which ties in much more strongly with the theme of transformation and rebirth while keeping with the bird motif as well as ties in Endeavor's personal trademark of fire. This second ending also has the potential to work thematically whether Hawks forgives Endeavor or not depending on the interpretation - the Phoenix rises again reborn despite the fire, or the fire itself gives the Phoenix new life to soar again.

In this case, both Perdix and Icarus fall from high towers due to Daedalus' hubris - the first lured there out of false pretense through no fault of his own and the second out of desperation and even mania to escape and live his own life; but notably, while Icarus loses his wings and falls to his doom, Perdix reaches the ground safely and continues on to live on transformed as a new being.

Again, this is all speculation, and Horikoshi can crush our dreams completely with a single chapter release, but the thought experiment is fun even if I wasn't sure every myth brought up quite works with the canon revealed to us so far, and I get the added bonus of learning about new mythologies I might otherwise not have looked into myself.

Thanks for dropping these in my inbox, anon! I know I may have shot down the Egyptian myth part a bit in regards to fitting with canon, but your points make for killer AU potential! Are there any other characters you see as having parallels to Egyptian gods - other AUs I’ve seen have given Dabi the role of Anubis, for example? I'd love to hear more!

#she speaks #bnha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #mha spoilers #spoiler!dabi #spoiler!hawks #dabi is icarus

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faejilly · 4 years

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tag game

Fic Writer Edition (tagged by @silver-latin-and-salt, tagging, idk, whoever is writing atm? @twistedsinews @leahazel @junemermaid, anyone who’d like, no one who doesn’t, etc.)

Fandoms: atm, primarily Shadowhunters. But also BioWare: Dragon Age and Mass Effect and maybe someday I’ll post some Jade Empire.

Also the occasional other game or TV show or Yuletide inspired one-shot. It’s a wide and ridiculous range of things, from a Georgette Heyer regency epilogue to Code: Realize and #7kpp to Firefly & even some Sleepy Hollow ficlets from back in s1 before we realized how terrible TPTB were going to be.

Number of fics: I have 158 works published on AO3.

This includes a couple of fanmixes that are linked on there to companion fics/series, two collaborative fics which are not just mine, even less so than most writing that is, and four WIPs: two of which I am still working on, one of which will absolutely 100% NEVER ever get more, and then that last one will probably not get more but who knows, maybe in ten years we’ll do a reunion and try again (it’s one of the collabs).

AS WELL AS: forty-seven different ficlet collections, sorted by fandom and pairing(s), because otherwise I would honestly have almost 1000 things and never be able to find a single damn one of them when I wanted to (and neither would anyone else). Like, ten of them are just for Shadowhunters because I split up the coda-fic by season and then also I put the porn in its own thing and Clizzy is kind of a post-canon AU so they’re on their own too and spin-offs of a particular fic setting get their own collection so they’re all together and etc. etc. etc.

Fic I spent a lot of time on: Do we count time actually writing? Or just the amount of time it hung out in my head before I finished it? Because I probably spent the most actual physical writing time on Lost For Words, which is a frothy cotton-candy experiment in long-fic for Mass Effect that I posted chapter by chapter as I wrote it and actually finished. (I have never successfully repeated the experience, tho I suppose a couple of my Shadowhunters fics will sort-of qualify in terms of length when they’re done, but they didn’t get posted semi-regularly and in progressive chapters in at all the same way.)

In terms of time between debut and completion, that would probably have to go to Cruel Intentions, which took over five years between initially going up on the Dragon Age Kink Meme and actually getting a conclusion.

i am for you and if broken hearts were whole have both been lingering WIPs for over two years at this point now, though, and a couple other DA2 fics were pretty close to that five year mark as well. 😅

Fic I didn’t spend a lot of time on: ashes of angels because I was coming up on my bingo deadline so I just pounded it out in a day. (It’s actually quite good tho! I think so, anyway! I am very proud of it! Read part one first, if you haven’t yet!)

also Impossible, (DA2, Bethany/Sebastian, confessional!porn) which mostly wrote itself in pretty short order, which was delightful. (Tho I also had a very astute beta for that one; don’t think he’s on tumblr anymore tho, or I’d yell at him in thanks again.) I told y’all I had a priest!kink problem. Not that you hadn’t all noticed on your own, anyways...

Longest fic: Finished? The aforementioned Lost for Words at just over 62k.

In limbo? Persephone Rising is literally three times longer than my next longest fic (and still not done!) but it is also a collab fic with three authors, so I suppose that sort of evens out?

Active WIP? i am for you at 59k. I’m not sure how much more is left of that one, tbqh... it will probably end up a bit longer than LfW, tho maybe not by much.

Shortest fic: I have no fucking clue, 47 ficlet collections, remember? In terms of a thing that I forgot to collect, apparently it is Consequences, which is my Brosca after the Landsmeet in DA:O.

Most hits/Most kudos/Most bookmarks: ALL THREE FOR i am for you! (Wonder how it’ll do when it’s no longer marked as a WIP?)

Total word count: On AO3: 1,137,609 !!!

(Sorry, you can see why I had to make that big tho, right?)

Fic I want to rewrite/expand: Except for the revisions to what is now Maleficar, I much prefer to leave fic as is, once it’s up there, so nothing on the re-write front. It was what it was when I did it, and it’s important to remember that, even when you move on to new stuff, imo.

But! I have potential/hopeful sequels in the WIP folder for and breathing is wishing, out of some dreaming tree, with an if in its soul, and several assorted ficlet collections & prompts I’ve sort of teased over the years.

Favourite fic of mine: At the moment, they have hung the sky with arrows because it’s a thing I’m not sure I ever really thought I was going to write, and then I did and I surprised myself a little, but it was fun and it ties together a lot of my thoughts on the Shadowhunters finale in a way I really enjoyed. (Also it has an actual plot! I don’t do that terribly often, I’m usually very introspective in my fic.)

Sneak peek of a WIP/Share an idea? I started a Shadowhunter!Magnus fic for a bingo square, but then scope creep! so I made a moodboard, but there is maybe a fic on the way... eventually. After my Bangs. 🤞🏻

The first time Magnus Bane met the High Warlock of Manhattan it was during his "travels", the two years after graduating from the Academy when most Nephilim wandered from Institute to Institute, seeing how things were done differently around the world, how they were still so often the same, learning about all the things you couldn't see in a classroom.

He wasn't actually in New York City in order to meet the High Warlock, of course, not as a 17-year-old foot soldier, that was well above his pay grade, as the mundanes put it. But when all the full-fledged Shadowhunters had work to do, he was assigned escort duty when the High Warlock showed up to do his yearly wards inspection.

Magnus met High Warlock Lightwood at the main entrance, and almost swallowed his own tongue at the sight of him, a broad shouldered, long-legged white man dressed in a conservative but very well-tailored suit, with heavy eyebrows, even heavier eyelashes, and a complete and utter lack of anything resembling an expression on his face.

A shiver went down Magnus' spine as he met the High Warlock's gaze, and he refused to think too much about why.

Magnus managed to introduce himself reasonably coherently, he thought, offering a hand to shake, but the High Warlock just raised an eyebrow at him. "I thought I'd talked them out of this nonsense last year."

"Uh." Magnus swallowed. The man was both terrifying and ludicrously attractive, and Magnus resigned himself to being a slightly stuttering idiot for the next four-to-six hours. "Not my call, I'm sorry to say. Sir."

The High Warlock rolled his eyes, and stepped forward. Magnus barely managed to dodge out of his way, and followed along behind him as he stalked towards the Angelic Core, where all the Institute Wards were anchored.

He never once acknowledged Magnus' presence as he worked, never asked for directions, or needed any sort of assistance. Magnus followed him anyway, and couldn't even bring himself to be upset about the waste of his time because damn, that view. He could see the shift of Lightwood's shoulders beneath the line of his coat, the tension in the muscles in his arms as each tiny motion correlated to whatever he was doing with his magic. There was so much power there, constrained and under his complete control.

The High Warlock never took so much as a wasted step in his clearly perfectly planned spiral of a route through the Institute's halls, circling out from the Core, stopping at each node, hitting all four corners of the building, before reaching the main doors again several hours later.

Once there he finally turned and looked at Magnus directly. He dipped his head in some slight acknowledgement, straightened his cuffs, and his face shifted into something that was merely neutral and professional rather than granite. "There were no concerns to note, Mr. Bane. The wards have been refreshed, and the contract terms have been met."

"Thank you," Magnus managed, though he had to cough to get his voice to cooperate.

The High Warlock's face softened, a hint of something that wasn't quite surprise in his eyes, but Magnus wasn't sure what to call it instead. "You're very welcome."

He nodded again, slightly more sincerely, perhaps, though there still wasn't enough of an expression on his face to properly qualify, in Magnus' opinion, and then he turned and left.

Magnus blinked at the doors as they shut behind him, and let out one long slow exhale. His shoulders relaxed, and it was only now that his posture sagged that he realized he'd been extra tense the entire time, as if waiting for an attack that had never come.

#on writing #fic memery #silver-latin-and-salt

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momentofmemory · 5 years

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Steeeeeeeve do Steve.

bless u. just as an fyi i’m gonna stick to mcu!Steve for simplicity’s sake.

it’s still going to be absurdly long and i’m not sorry.

How I feel about this character

ahksdlfjsk

ca:tfa - fell in love with him. the movie’s a great character study until the montage of him as cap starts, regains its footing at the very end. the i had a date is the best and most heartbreaking closing line in the entire mcu. my favourite thing is that he just cares so much and his motivation is literally just that he wants to do right.

a1&2 - joss does not understand cap at all and i’m still salty about this. main positives are the brief depictions of his not insignificant ptsd. The text of the dream in aou is especially great even if joss doesn’t fully understand the meaning (steve does not fear going home because he doesn’t know how to leave war; he fears leaving war because he don’t know how to go home and this is an important distinction). fav thing is his consistent willingness to see the good in people/give second chances (bruce, clint, natasha, the maximoffs, etc.)

ca:tws - masterpiece. perfection. tearjerker. fight choreography. fav thing is that it highlights the power of friendship and believing in people in a spy movie of all things and i dig that. also the helicarrier scene makes me cry every time.

ca:cw - really annoyed me the first time i saw it bc a)the marvel fandom went NUTS and b)i didn’t think it was a cap movie so much as an avengers movie but you know what, it grew on me. fav thing is the fact that he honestly does try to explain his reasoning for his actions several times and i really wish this had been fleshed out more.

a:iw - listen. listen if you told me i was going to see steve literally just a)walk out from behind a train and b)hold back a shiny glove for like 30seconds and it would be amazing i would have laughed at you, but here we are.

a:eg - steve lifting the hammer and taking on thanos is my second favourite moment in cinematic history, but my favourite one come right after, when steven grant rogers, just a kid from brooklyn, beaten and broken and in no shape to win whatsoever, stands up to face the entire army all by himself. because that is why i love steve rogers. it’s not because he knows he can win. it’s because he knows he can’t, but he’s going to do it anyway. it’s all very samwise gamgee: “they kept going because they were holding on to something: that there’s some good in this world, and it’s worth fighting for.” and i resonate with that, you know? people lose for doing the right thing every day, and maybe it’s not enough to save them. but it might be enough to save the next guy down the line.

“you start running, they’ll never let you stop. you stand up, push back — they can’t say no forever.”

All the people I ship romantically with this character

don’t usually ship peeps so i’ll just go with canon, as i do think steggy works quite well. most of the other popular ships have enough implicit canon to support them so as long as no one drags peggy through the mud to AU their ship i’m pretty fine with that too (but lord am i ever done with people dumping on steve bc their ship didn’t get fulfilled… like dude, if you only love a character if they’re romantically entangled w a specific person you don’t actually love that character).

My non-romantic OTP for this character

u know it’s gotta be my girl natasha romanoff; pairing them up in tws is still the best mcu character decision to date. i just really really love how mutual their friendship is. they’re fully fledged characters on their own and clearly have lives outside of each other, and they acknowledge that they won’t always agree. they also read each other very well and respect the other’s opinion, two things i highly value in a friendship.

another facet i find really important is that they’re mutually vulnerable with each other?? like, nat has seen steve cry and steve has seen nat cry. nat has fallen apart with steve there and steve has fallen apart with nat there. it’s a level of reciprocity we don’t get in most of the other mcu friendships (also why i hate hate hate bruce/nat why the valhalla and hel is nat exposing her deepest trauma to make bruce feel better in aou??), so. basically they just embody the kind of friendship where having the other one around makes them both better people, which, imo, is pretty much the definition of what friendship is.

My unpopular opinion about this character

depending on what’s floating in the suggested tag i sometimes feel like liking him is the unpopular opinion. 😅uh but in seriousness my unpopular opinion is that he did not make the decisions he did in cw just because “but bucky uwu,” though that’s obviously a factor. the accords came out of nowhere with a 1000 page law right after he’s experienced a)the world security council try to nuke new york and b)shield being hydra, and that’s in-canon. real world events would include him coming right out of seeing the us impose japanese internment, discovering we nuked civilian cities in japan twice, vietnam and everything that was the cold war, etc. like, i definitely think the general concept of some kind of restrictions on super heroes makes sense, especially when it comes to respecting other countries’ borders. but do i wanted it to be headed up by general thaddeus “i want a hulk”? heck no.

also an unpopular opinion might be “it’s super possible to think a character is wrong about something without hating them.”

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

i don’t remember who said it first, but peter parker is very much the perfect combo of Steve’s and Tony’s best characteristics and i would have loved to see him interact with Steve more. training sessions, arguments about what counts as the better half of new york, run-ins with our favourite blind ninja, etc. just so much lost potential right there.

i would have also liked more closure between tony & steve than what we got in endgame, but eh. i’ll live.

#steve rogers #meta #mcu #marvelmeta #ca:cw #ca:tws #asks #personal #experimentaldata #long post #i'm so sorry this got so long you guys #i got an unexpected free hour at work and just #went off?#ahem

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dustydreamsanddirtyscars · 5 years

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Hi. I just wanted to say, that i read back all your meta and opinions and i completely agree with you about the loss of the quality of the show. If im being completeley honest which i am, i have to say that i believe this show would have been easily the best show on tv, if the Netflix, HBO or Cinemax were taken it. Cw always ruins everything. This show should be scary, mad-toe-to-toe action filled with great writing. People in the chair with a pen not doing such good job. Have nice day. :)

Hi dear!

It isn’t a lot of fun to be so filled with disappointment regarding the show that despite all the bad writing and bad everything really of the last couple of seasons under Dabb still is the show that means most to you. And I am mostly keeping my mouth shut about it these days, because nobody likes to be bombarded with negative thoughts.

But I agree with you, the show deserves much better than it what it is cursed with at the moment. I have wondered many a times how much better SPn could have been even in its best seasons if it had a budget like let’s say “The Walking Dead”. I’m sure it would have been just breathtaking. Which is not to say that I haven’t felt absolutely enthralled by seasons past the way the show ran - I have been, I fell in love with it the way it was and now I seem to be falling out of love with it, because it is painful to me to see the show lose everything that it once stood for and that made it unique and an emotional journey to be invested in. There is just barely anything left of what made this show the show I love.

I will not type up again all that I am missing on the show these days, I have done that more times I can count - and it wo’t change anything. At this point I am just sad that SPN - the show closest to my heart - will just trickle out in meaningless cheap melodrama, when it had all the potential in the world but a showrunner who lost himself in the hype around himself and the fanservice strewn across all of the seasons without it actually being planned out in a proper and meaningful way, but just given as little pieces of candy for certain groups of the fandom. It doesn’t work for me that way. The show lacks integrity, it lacks heart, because frankly that heart, that core is not being the focus anymore (with this week’s episode being an exception), but storylines with characters I don’t care about and that are executed poorly and just foot on cheap drama.

I never would have thought I would come to this point but I think SPN should have ended with S11 when Dean held the amulet glowing in his hand and Chuck said “hi”. Everything that came after that... It’s a different show and it may feature the Winchesters (now and again, sadly Dabb isn’t truly interested in their story but rather everybody elses) and the Impala and the bunker, but it’s not the same show, it’s not the same depth, the same thought and love poured into it, it’s just... heartless. And that is painful, because what this whole show rests upon is emotion, emotion delivered and felt through the main characters with Dean as the narrator most of all, but he is barely in the picture these days (again this episode being an exception).

So yeah, those are my two cents once again that nobody wanted to hear. And to end this reply with a nod towards the episode: Maybe the writers should take a look at their set up and what Dean saw when he read that book, which I think is a blank page. Dean, ultimate symbol of free will, uniting humanity and divnity within, re-writer of the apocalypse, the one ripping up the pages of destiny, his “book of life (and death)” now has a blank page and what could possibly be more scary than that for Dean? He’s overwhelmed, he’s got all the possibilities in the world, in the end this action and though all other books having been rewritten don’t matter, because they haven’t been written by Dean himself. It’s up for Dean to decide, to write his own story, be the master of his own destiny. He isn’t just the God of his own story, he is also the Death of his own story.

And that is kind of the thing that Michael despite all his boasting doesn’t understand. He doesn’t need to kill God, really, he can’t kill God, because he is already dead. Nothing made this more clear than this blank page - that I assume is what Dean saw in that book and that is what freaks Dean out more than any other scenario written down would have (though granted with this writing team, they probably go down some idiotic blatent route and explanation) imo. Maybe Dabb should leave the pen to Dean Winchester, I’m sure he’d be a better writer than any of the people currently on staff...

#Ask #minamartin #SPN Meta #Supernatural Meta #SPN spoilers #14x10 #Nihilism #Unpopular opinion #SPN criticism #Dabb criticism

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noretreatnancy · 3 years

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January Reading Wrap-Up

Okay so I want to start typing up a little summary/review for each of the books I read this year, so that maybe some of my followers can find some new titles! This month I read 5 romances, 2 fantasies, 2 non-fiction (a memoir and a recounting of some supposedly true paranormal events), and 1 mystery/thriller. If you’re interested in any of those genres, maybe check out the reviews under the cut :)

Mystery/Thriller

Lock Every Door by Riley Sager

Rating: 2.5/5

This book was a mega disappointment for me. The concept was really intriguing. Jules has just recently been through some life turmoil, losing her job, boyfriend, and home in the same day. She takes a job apartment sitting in a very prestigious historical building with a dark history. Weird occurrences ensue, including strict rules and missing apartment sitters. If you don’t read/watch a lot of mystery/thriller/(even true crime) content and are interested in dabbling, this could be a good choice for you. Unfortunately, I found the hints started dropping a little too early, and the answers were a little too obvious for me to be properly intrigued. I wanted a really slow burn mystery, and this just felt overly rushed for me.

Non-Fic

In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado (memoir)

Rating: 5/5

I don’t usually rate non-fiction, especially memoirs, because it’s hard for me to but a grade on someone’s account of their own life. But holy shit this book blew me out of the water. This is the story of Carmen Maria Machado’s abusive same-sex relationship, and the unique struggles faced by victims of f/f relationship violence. First of all, Machado’s writing is unparralled. Absolutely gorgeous. The way she structures this, all the history and pop culture she ties in keeps it feeling fresh and engaging. The content is of course very heavy, dealing with themes of abuse in many different forms. However, imo these issues are handled with honesty and grace, in a way that never felt gratuitous.

The Mothman Prophecies by John Keel (paranormal account)

Rating: N/A

Uhm... I hated every second of reading this. I love Mothman. I love reading/watching/listening to content around weird/spooky/paranormal occurrences. I did not love this book. It was so boring. Total slog to read. There was no narrative structure/order of events. I assumed the story would track the beginning of weird reports in Point Pleasant, then follow Keel’s own arrival and investigation of these reports, with his own experiences and background being used to create a coherent story. That’s not what this is. This is a random arrangement of ufo/men in black/strange encounter stories that all fit a similar theme. Not to say no one would enjoy this, or that it doesn’t present interesting theories (it certainly does), just didn’t work for me. If you want a more easily digestible (and by FAR more enjoyable) version of this, check out the Astonishing Legends podcast and their episodes covering this book.

Fantasy

Black Sun (Book 1, Between Earth and Sky) by Rebecca Roanhorse

Ratung: 4/5

Finally some good fucking food. if you’re looking for some adult fantasy with a new and interesting world, have I got a book for you. This is a multiple POV story following four main characters and two main plotlines. Xiala, a Teek (siren-esque) ship captain hired to transport Serapio (who may or may not be the vessel of an apocalypse god) to the city of Tova, where Naranpa (the Sun Priestess) is trying to navigate a city on the brink of political upheaval. The world is inspired by Pre-Columbian civilizations in the Americas, and the lore/magic/politics are all totally unlike any other fantasy I’ve read.

Come Tumbling Down (Book 5, Wayward Children) by Seanan McGuire

Rating: 3

This was definitely a solid addition to this series, if not my favorite. The Wayward Children series follows the adventures of children who were able to enter magical worlds, but for a variety of reasons had to leave those worlds. This book most closely aligns with books one and two, almost feeling like a direct sequel to book two with the addition of characters from book three. It didn’t have the emotional impact for me that earlier books did, but there was nothing glaringly bad or wrong here. I would definitely recommend this series to anyone who enjoyed portal/doorway/wardrobe to a magical world stories as a kid.

Romance

The Bride Test (Book 2, The Kiss Quotient) by Helen Hoang

Rating: 5/5

I love this series. I love these characters. As far as I’m concerned, Helen Hoang cannot fucking miss. This is an excellent sequel to The Kiss Quotient, but can be read on it’s own no problem. This story follows Esme, a Vietnamese woman who is enlisted to travel to the US to woo and marry Khai, an autistic man who isn’t interested in dating (much to the concern of his mother). They’re both dealing with their own issues in this book. Khai is convinced that he can’t feel love, because he’s spent his entire life being told he’s demonstrating it in the wrong way. Esme is dealing with the struggles of a new immigrant, who wants to be able to support her family back in Vietnam (including her young daughter), while also dealing with the pressure to seduce Khai. Shenanigans ensue. These books have the perfect balance of sweetness/sexy appeal/angst. There is a good deal of miscommunication/misunderstanding/secret keeping in here, but it’d ultimately a minor issue in an overall really supportive relationship full of mutual admiration. I will absolutely be reading the third book, and I highly recommend the series overall.

She Tempts the Duke (Book 1, Lost Lords of Pembrook) by Lorraine Heath

Rating: 3/5

This was fine. I’ve read better historical romance, but I have certainly read worse. This book follows Mary and Sebastian, childhood friends separated by a tragedy. When they were children, Sebastian and his brothers were forced to flee for their lives based on the actions of their power hungry uncle. Now, as adults, they have returned to reclaim their father’s title. Mary, who helped them escape, has just been allowed back into society after a childhood in a convent, and she must work extra hard to maintain her reputation in order to maintain her engagement. I’m sure you can imagine where it goes from there. The story itself is very simple, there were no twists or unexpected turns. The childhood friends aspect could’ve been played up more imo, but I did enjoy the care between the two leads. They really want what’s best for each other. The most interesting aspect for me was the relationship between the brothers, and how they’ve all been changed and hardened by their pasts.

Spoiler Alert by Olivia Dade

Rating: 3.5/5

This was cute! The book follows Marcus (a major actor in a GOT-esque blockbuster fantasy TV show on the rocks) and April (fan of the show). April and Marcus both write fanfiction for the same ship (half of which is Marcus’s own character), and have developed a strong online friendship, both keeping their identities secret. If anyone were to find out that Marcus writes show critical fanfic, he would be in serious legal trouble, not to mention what it would do to his reputation. April has been keeping her fandom life separate from her real life, in order to maintain credibility in her career. However, a new work environment gives her the confidence to be more open about her passions. April posts a cosplay of herself as one of the characters from the show (the other half of their ship). April is plus-size, and her cosplay gets a lot of attention, some of which being internet typical negativity. Marcus sees this hate online, and is so upset by it that he publicly praises her and asks her on a date (not knowing April is his fanfic buddy). Shenanigans ensue. I liked this book a lot, I thought the concept was cute and I loved how sweet Marcus was at all times. The relationship felt really grounded in the friendship/common interests of the characters. There is a lot of misunderstanding/miscommunication in this book, to the point where I did become frustrated, even if it is understandable based on the insecurities of the characters.

Take A Hint, Dani Brown (Book 2, The Brown Sisters) by Talia Hibbert

Rating: 4/5

Zaf I am in love with you. This is the second book in the series but you can totally read it on its own without the context of the first book. This is the story of Dani (a bi phd student with a no relationship rule) and Zaf (an ex-pro rugby player turned security guard who loves romance novels and deals with extreme anxiety). Zaf and Dani work in the same building on a college campus, and have developed a casual friendship. During a fire drill gone wrong, a video of Zaf rescuing Dani goes viral, with everyone thinking they are a couple. Zaf wants to use the publicity to help his charity organization (helping teen boys learn emotional maturity), Dani wants a no-strings sex arrangement with Zaf, fake-dating ensues. This series is the blueprint for healthy relationships built on mutual respect and admiration, with two characters learning to deal with their own issues with the help and support of their potential romantic partner. If you don’t usually read romance bc of the genre-typical problematic content, consider checking this series out.

One Foot in the Grave (Book 2, Night Huntress) by Jeaniene Frost

Rating: 3/5

This series follows Cat, a half human/half vampire hybrid who hunts vampires. In this book, set four years after the first, she is the leader of a vampire hunting secret government kill squad. Her ex-lover, the vampire Bones, who trained her and is basically the love of her life, reappears after four years of separation. They are very, very obviously Buffy and Spike (if Spike was a good guy). It was better than the first one. More/better humor, Cat is much less annoying. I liked the relationship dynamics, particularly with Cat and her team. It really kind of negates the big conflict set up at the end of the first book, so that all the relationship drama there feels very pointless. There is a TON of woman/woman hate in this series and it’s so cringey. I try to be lenient bc the books are old and I know that kind of attitude was common back then, but oh my god is it gross and weird. There is literally ONE female character Cat views in a positive lights, and she literally disappears into thin air 1/4 of the through the book. I wish the romance wasn’t so rushed (a complaint I had in the first book as well). If you like paranormal romance and don’t mind a pretty dated read, this series could be fun for you.

Other

Rooms by Lauren Oliver

Rating: 3/5

I have no idea what genre to call this (literary fiction?? kind of??). It’s a ghost story and the story of a pretty messed up family dealing with their issues. The writing is really pretty, but the story feels kind of without substance. Like there are multiple POVs (the two ghosts haunting the house, the mother of the family, the sister and the brother, the niece), but none of them really struck any cords with me. I never felt emotionally connected to anyone. It was a really easy read, I enjoyed the writing. The concept was interesting. It just felt a little hollow and pointless to me, which sounds really harsh considering I by no means hated it.

#books #book review #my reading #january reading wrap up

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spraklecat · 6 years

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Thorpe Park TR. This park is very enjoyable if you get Fast Track but don’t think I’d want to go without at least getting some one-shots because operations in general are a shitshow.

More consistent coaster quality than Alton, doesn’t have a real standout though an the only one I found unpleasant/underwhelming enough to not reride was Walking Dead because stumbling through all the dark hallways just to ride the rave zombie family coaster was annoying.

Detailed thoughts below

Thorpe Park

This park definitely exceeded my expectations. I came in expecting it to be a bit of a dump with rough, run down rides and theming and an awful clintele. While I can’t deny that it definitely seems to be trying to hide the wear with dark n gritty stuff, it’s actually pretty visually attractive. I love all the foliage around Nemesis Inferno in particular, also the Atlantis theme of the Lost City and the overall tropical island theme of the park. It was a bright, sunny day and that only made that last bit work out better. I might have even gotten a bit sunburned. In England of all places lol

Anyways, it was frustrating trying to find some lockers and the fast track redemption place and that took a good 30 minutes. The walkways are pretty confusing and convoluted imo, though I probably should have used my map more. At least the park is pretty compact so it wasn’t a big deal when I needed to go halfway across the park for something. While I took a pretty logical path at Alton, I did a lot more looping around and backtracking so I’ll just talk about the rides individually.

Quantum- I went on this first because it was close to the lockers and it had me curious because I’ve never been on one of these magic carpet rides and never even knew Thorpe had one until recently. It’s a forceful little thing on the full swings, though sadly the short cycle doesn’t do more than a few of those.

Colossus(2x)- another ride that I’ve been curious about. It wasn’t half as bad as I expected, not really much rougher than Saw and leaning forward avoided most headbanging. Though the front row of each car is just weird with the foot rest things that make you fold your legs up and be unable to get the lapbar all the way down and each car’s floor looked tilted from the station. Odd. The ride itself felt pretty formulaic, but the interactions with the surroundings and bridges were great. A lot of rides here seem to be well incorporated with their surroundings/theming, arguable moreso than a number of those at Alton Towers.

Saw: The Ride(3x)- Not as rough as people claim imo, particularly in the morning. It’s really not worse than Smiler though both also have the awful gerstlauer OTSRs. I hate hydraulic restraints in general but especially these because they feel so hard and angular and tend to beat up my shoulders and clamp down on my thighs. Those were tolerable since the ride js otherwise fun, especially the dark pre-lift bit and the first drop. I’m used to dive machines that creep over the edge and just being whipped over like that got me every time. Especially with the giant blades overhead.

Nemesis Inferno (2x)-Easily my least favorite B&M invert since the layout doesn’t do much, but gorgeous planted surroundings and the least physically taxing of the major rides. Obnoxiously slow operations that were probably aggravated by belt buckles that seemed a bit stiff and difficult to clip shut (but seemed to mainly be ops fussing over little things with guests).

Stealth(3x)- More stiff restraints, but that was a good thing on a few of my rides since they were so stiff they didn’t clamp down painfully. Great air over the top in the second to last car and great launch of course. This ride is way more fun than I expected in general.

Vortex- Eh, I prefer more swinging than spinning in these kinds of rides.

Rush(2x)- Gave me my swinging fix but unfortunately short cycles. I absolutely love the noises these things make.

Samurai- Actually has an impressively long cycle for a park. It’s comparable to the travelling one at some US fairs that I’ve also ridden (Space Roller). I can really enjoy these rides depending on my mood but wasn’t really feeling it today. The backwards bit caused some really funky noninverting maneuvers.

Detonator- I’ve been on similar towers and this one drops just as well as them.

Swarm(2x)- Maybe it’s the theming or lower quality of the park, but I found this much more enjoyable than Gatekeeper. It’s a lot shorter, but felt like it made its elements more meaningful. Didn’t even really notice that it slowed down towards the end since I didn’t want more positives Gs anyways with the vests crushing down on me.

The Walking Dead:The Ride-

The scare maze bits were mostly unpleasant shuffles through the dark trying not to lose the group or bump into the wall. I like the fact that the actors here can actually touch you, though I cracked up at how they mostly just looked drunk. The actual ride was also pretty hilarious with the rave lights flashing on the zombies. Also kudos to the guy who thought to make it so everything felt so urgent and people didn’t fuck around as much in the station.

Derren Brown’s Ghost Train- I love the Underground theme. It seems like such a good potential spooky setting with how tight, dark, hot, and loud it is. Won’t go into details but I found the VR bit interesting but underwhelming compared to the more physical parts. Except when it did get a bit physical as well at one moment and the one part when the bloody-faced Asian chick pops up because I still haven’t forgotten that one terrifying Korean webcomic. The ending also got me good.

Rumba Rapids- Pathetic. I got one little splash on my arm. Ride doesn’t do much in general. I had a zen ride on it which was definitely something.

Tidal Wave- Don’t usually bother with these rides but I was hot and thought I might as well. Not as wet as I hoped but not bad at all. My onride photo was somewhere between someone having a religious moment and the double peace signs ahegao face and I wish I’d gotten it just because of that.

#i do have some good humanized ideas for the coasters #i see them as all trying to be tough guys but they're mostly all softies #except saw who's just edgy to the core

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