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stevenbasic · 8 months

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Growing into the Job, Post 347: A Sunday at Melissa's, p5

We were there in my bedroom for - how long? An hour, more? Bonding, dry nursing, gazing into one another’s eyes with him all bundled up on my lap. Time went so quick when we were together! All I know is that I’d heard my mom’s weird clock chime at one point; otherwise I didn’t pay too much attention to time...we had alllll Sunday, just the two of us. It was rainy outside so there was nothing better to do today than snuggle snuggle snuggle together. Bond bond bond him to me. He certainly seemed to be liking it so far! All cuddled up into me like a bug in a rug, he’d finally calmed down and seemed at peace after his almost-dying in the pool earlier. My nipple in his mouth helped I think haha. He was getting so good at this, dry-nursing, relaxing, zoning out into my breast, and I was getting the hang of exactly what parmo…phairm…perfumes to use, which ones to release out of my nipple and breast to keep him relaxed and happy and focused on me while he did this. It was like I could watch and feel his brain cells responding to me, lining up for me, changing and starting to behave like good little boys for me. Meanwhile he just sort of nuzzled and cooed and suckled and when it all became too intense for him I’d let him rut his little hips into me, through the towel I’d swaddled him in. He’d come against the weight of the underside of my breast, or against my hand and it felt so nice, tingly. I could feel the bliss shivers in the girls, too; they’d all gone home but I’m sure they appreciated this haha. Maybe he did that twice, maybe three times, and dozed in and out a bit after, once woken by more chimes. My insides would get all gooey, just watching him wake up next to my nipple and immediately go back to sucking.

Aren’t you the lucky little man? Being with the hot, big-boobie mommy giantess wifey you’ve always wanted? Because that’s what I’m turning into for you, aren’t I?

I swear I could have sat there with him like this forever. Eventually, though, I’d heard his little tummy start to rumble and as much as we were enjoying ourselves, I’d figured I should pull him off and get him to eat for real. I wanted to dress him up cute in some of the comfy stuff I’d picked up for him on my shopping trip with Shanette yesterday, a new pair of gray sweatpants and a matching top. But the new little underpants I bought him didn’t fit around his, um, penis. He seemed to be getting smaller everywhere but there! Maybe if I wasn’t in the room, and it wasn’t quite so hard all the time, he’d have an easier go at it. But in the meantime…

“Ohh honey with you all excited like that, you just don’t fit in the cute little underwear I bought you. You’re such a big boy down here! Come here and let me help you put on your pants,” I giggled. We’d stood, and he was standing there all naked. “I don't want you to hurt yourself trying to stuff it inside." With that I pushed him back onto the bed in front of me. He looked so surprised when I lifted his little toosh so I could get the sweatpants up and over his thighs and his hips and his nngh hard I want to do that again but it’ll have to wait. Breakfast first! "You’ll just have to go without underpants until we come up with something else.”

The look on his face was too much when I gave him a little slap on his bottom.

Omigod if I had my way I’d dress you every day! You’re too adorable! Watching him blushing like that just got my mommy-juices flowing, and made me really laugh.

Anyway, I was still feeling overprotective of him all through cooking him breakfast. I’d immediately regretted sitting him up on that high stool at the kitchen bar, worried that he might fall and hurt himself. Silly, right? But still, I wanted him to watch me cook, fixing up the eggs and sausage patties I was going to make into breakfast sandwiches and perched there at the bar across from the stovetop he’d have a perfect spot to watch me cracking eggs. Just like I’ve done to you this weekend, huh? Cracked you open? He watched, and he even yelled at me to be careful when I put my hand right down on a still-orange-hot ceramic burner. I pulled it right back, on instinct - it was warm for sure, but really didn’t hurt at all! He was a little freaked out by it, eyes as big as saucers, not believing what he was seeing. I guess you’ve got a fireproof girlfriend, huh? I was tempted to put my hand right back down on it, palm flat, look him in the eyes, show you what I can do. Anyway, I was more worried about him - those seats were so tall! He could slip off and fall! But, yes, I guess I was just being a nervous nelly because he was fine and finally I got to sit alongside him, on his left, on a stool of my own, to make sure he stayed safe.

“You haven’t drank any of your juice,” I commented nodding at the little glass I’d filled for him as I cut up his sausage patty into teeny tiny pieces, “I could pour you some milk but you should get your vitamin C.” After a little thought I’d figured it’d be best if he just had his eggs and sausage like normal on a plate, not a sandwich. Easier to eat and chew and not choke.

“Yeah huh,” he mumbled, like he was distracted by something, like my not-burnt-up hand got him thinking too hard. Since I’d sat him down, and as I cooked, I’d felt he was a little distant. He was definitely being quiet. So as I sliced up his food next to him, I made sure to take in a nice deep breath and swell up my boobs in my top, a black tank with white piping. If you’re going to be distracted by something, I want it to be me.

“Is everything alright?” I asked. Wow, so serious. I don’t know if I like that. Just look at my boobies.

He finally spoke. “Thank you for saving my life today.”

Oooo. That’s what was distracting you? Me being your superhero? Well, that’s okay haha.

“Oh, it was my pleasure!” I laughed, waving him off. I didn’t want him to think that I thought it was a huge deal. It’s just what I do now. But it did fill me with a little pride, knowing I had his life in my hands like this, that it’s only because of me he’s still breathing. “But maybe I deserve a raise!” <giggle!>

To that he gave me a funny look, But just then, suddenly, she was on the counter, between us, the little ball of fur.

“Tiger!!” I exclaimed, thankfully remembering the right name even in my surprise, “Bad boy!” I pushed her away - she’d immediately gone for his meal - but she was obviously hungry and persisted. “Shoo! Don’t be such a brat!” I said, as I reached with my left arm across the bar to grab another small plate and slide the platter of extra scrambled eggs and sausage towards myself. “Don’t worry I’ll feed you,” I said, as I forked over a patty and some eggs, about the same amount I’d served to him. I began to cut them up into teeny tiny pieces. She was now staring at the plate, trying to be patient. “What a hungry boy this morning, huh?” I said.

Watching me make a plate for ‘Tiger’ that looked just like the one I’d made for him, Jay spoke up. “You do know that's a female cat, right?" he said, like he was telling me something new.

"Oh of course!” I said, “I just like to tease her!”

At that, he shrugged and set to pushing his food around his plate with his fork, satisfied with my explanation. I’m sure you’re thinking ‘that's really weird’. But that’s me! Yep you’re stuck with the crazy girl!

I set the plate of cat food on the floor - “No kitties on counters!” I told her, just to piss her off - and she jumped down for it. Me, myself? Yes! I was hungry! I’d loaded two sausages and eggs onto some toast and started digging into it sandwich style. It was actually pretty good - I didn’t burn anything! My cooking skills were improving haha!!

Now that I was done cooking, I let him watch me eat. Feeling him watch my jaw, my throat muscles, how my neck moved gave me a warm dominant feeling. He watched my hands, so big around the sandwich. He watched my lips, my teeth, my nom nom RAWR mouth haha just open up reeeeeal wide and BITE. He had such an intent look in his eyes, I loved it. And when I put my sandwich down to reach up and release the loose ponytail I’d put in, his jaw sorta haha fell open and he watched my hair cascade down around my shoulders.

“Y-your hair looks longer,” he said.

“Yeah I didn’t cut it yet today,” I replied, reaching behind my neck and fluffing it out, letting it all fall now halfway down my back. His look was so precious! That obviously confused him: who needs to cut their hair every day? Me! I do! Ever since I met you.

“You’re still not drinking your juice,” I finally said, trying to keep my concern from making me sound too nitpicky. “You’ve had a big weekend, you need your energy,” I continued, pressing him. He just sort of looked at his little glass, not really saying too much, so I took it and gulped it but didn’t swallow. In my mouth for a moment I let it warm up or whatever, watched him watching me, and spit it all back into his glass.

“You know what to do,” I said, as I slid it back to him with a soft smile. I know, baby. I know what you need, it’s okay.

Without much delay at all - well, maybe a little, he looked embarrassed - he drank it. A few sips, then a bit more. OOOoooo that was exciting, so funny, watching him! I could feel my eyes sparkling, eagerly. That’s where we are, honey, you and me. It’s fine. You need me for this sort of thing. “Would you like more?” I asked.

“No thank you.”

"Baby you have to eat, get some energy" I cooed in his ear as I leaned in closer to him, blanketing him with my perfumes. "It will help you keep up with me. Don’t you want to be able to do that?" I looked down at his plate, which was basically untouched. I promise it wasn’t me! My cooking was actually now pretty good! With his fork I speared a piece of sausage, one I’d cut for him into a little morsel, and chewed it up a bit, more than I normally would. He let out the cutest little moan as he watched me chew. Do you know what’s about to happen? Then, my free hand went behind his head and I leaned in for a kiss. “C’mre, baby,” I said, around the bit of sausage, right before our lips met, “give me a kiss.”

The sparks, yes, as usual - our kisses were always so exciting! - but I used my tongue to push the chewed-up bit of sausage into his mouth. I felt him stiffen, a little shocked or surprised, but when I sealed my lips back up and backed off a bit, I knew he knew what he needed to do. I watched as he chewed it a bit, even though he didn’t need to, and swallowed,

Oh my god I’m chewing his food for him now!

Without even letting him get the chance to talk, to complain or argue or feel embarrassed, I forked and chewed up another bit of sausage, this time with some nice soft buttery scrambled eggs. Mushed all up, I kissed and pushed it into him again. This time, he didn’t even try to chew on his own; he just swallowed.

“You…you like my cooking, huh?” I said, getting a little - haha, omigod! Look at your face! - hot under the collar, warm in my chest. It was, now that I think back on it, the first real feeling of the swelling in my breasts that would get to be such a part of my life soon. When he nodded, acknowledging that yes yes yes you liked it, I waved my hand over my chest, fanning myself. “Sorry, but…you got my mama juices flowing all over again,” I told him, with a giggle.

I’d taken another forkful, a bit more this time, and had started to chew. He looked at me, his eyes all confused, and leaned back in his chair a bit. He wanted to show me something. He looked down at his own lap, and I did too. Oh my god! His penis was so hard! Sticking up, between his elastic waistband and belly, out from his gray sweatpants. It nearly got up to his, like, ribcage!

He only said one word. “W-w-why?” he asked me.

To that, I giggled, I laughed a little, and shrugged. I didn’t really know, but it all made sense!

“I d-didn’t used to be like this,” he said, his voice all small and little and nnngh making me want to just forget the eggs and eat him up!

I could only come up with one thing to say, as I stood up. ”That was then,” I told him as my hand took hold of his erection, still chewing a bit as I - standing over him now - took his jaw in my other hand and raised his chin. I leaned in again to feed him, giving him a nice, purposeful squeeze down below. “This is now.”

I could feel the hunger pheromones (that’s what they’re called!) totally pouring off of me. His mouth widened right up for me, his neck craning. “That’s right, open up for mama bird,” I said, and just opened my mouth to let my mouthful of food empty into him as I sealed my mouth around his. It sounds gross, maybe? But omgggggg it was so hot, feeling him take it, feeling his little neck and throat working, swallowing my offering.

“That’s right, take the food I bought for you, with my money, the food I cooked for you,” I said, as I lifted back up again, “Now the food I chewed for you.” What’s next baby? What’s our next step? What else can my body do for you? Help keep you fed and nourished?

Oh god I couldn’t help myself I took a big bite of my own egg and sausage sandwich and as I chewed it for him and made it extra mushy I hugged his head to my chest with one hand, and as I dropped my mouth again to his open one I started jerking him off.

Feed from me feed from me feed from me babyyyyyyy

He jerked a bit - actually a lot, his body went all stiff! - as I pushed even more of my wet, chewed food than before into our big kiss. I squeezed his face into my boobs and stroked and stroked and felt the warmth from him and even more in my chest swelling it was like almost tender-getting and I felt him swallow and he groaned and then he was exploding again in my hand oh god making a new mess.

“That’s good, baby, that’s so good,” I purred, feeling him shudder against me, “come for mama bird.” I also felt the girls out there all cooing and clucking in the Bliss, and I was so happy here knowing I wasn’t only feeding him but them too. I - me, Melissa Monroe, Melissssy - I could provide for everybody!

I can’t wait!

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#growing into the job

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vigilskeep · 4 months

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Hiya, do u have a carrd or anything with info on your ocs? I love reading about ocs n all that crap but the tumblr search function is like actually evil. Keir seems super interesting but it’s like killing me trying to find posts to recap his lore 😭

i don’t i’m afraid!! it’s just his enormous mess of a tag as the lore built up... i might make something sometime??? i hadnt thought abt it tbh. in the meantime feel free to ask me any and all questions even if it’s something i’ve probably already said, i love going over this stuff and will do so forever if even slightly prompted. on that note, if it helps, here is a briefly condensed version:

keir is a red personality (aggressive/direct) non-mage hawke. i did his full playthrough as a warrior, i sometimes talk about switching him to rogue, but the only really important thing is that he’s a reaver and will bite you for real

he’s a man of few words, extremely blunt and threatening to the point of being absurdly over-the-top with pretty much all strangers, and much softer but still bluntly earnest with the small group of people he considers his own. he considers himself first and foremost a protector and would do anything to keep those people safe. his father malcolm was a strict man who raised him to do this and he accepted that wholeheartedly. consider him a guard dog. killed his first templar in defence of the family aged 15

he adores and idolises magic and fiercely supports mage freedom, though ultimately he would absolutely sacrifice a wider “cause” if doing so would keep his mages safe. fortunately or unfortunately, he can’t do that because the two are inextricable

he’s a proud fereldan and cares very little for kirkwall (hates kirkwall. hates kirkwall. someone please get him out of here) and its nobility, which tends to show in his appearance and behaviour. long braided hair, the streak across his nose is kaddis, and takes his mabari, silla, absolutely everywhere

he’s elf-blooded via his father, who was the bastard son of a fereldan elven servant girl and an orlesian chevalier who was with the occupation

his playthrough has circle mage bethany. he adores her and he would do anything for her but her acceptance of her fate and disillusionment with his overprotectiveness meant they had an increasingly strained relationship. it was because she was trapped that he couldn’t leave the city. once he was champion, meredith essentially had a knife to his sister’s throat whenever she wanted his compliance, not to mention the looming threat to anders and merrill, making those three years the worst and most terrifying in his life

he romances anders! friendmance and they escape kirkwall together in the end. not always easy but he really loves him, justice half included. there’s a lot of lore here ummm if i mention the “and they were housemates” timeline, that’s my silly mutual pining alternate version of events where anders moves into the amell estate for safekeeping before he and keir actually get together. if i mention aura hawke, that’s the potential daughter i occasionally hc for them

he had previous relationships with morrigan (in lothering as young 20-somethings) and merrill (during act 1). you cannot keep him away from those romanceable mages

he’s still close friends with merrill. isabela is his best friend. he has a complicated, semi-antagonistic friendship with varric, who was really closer with anders but now after the fact doesn’t want to remember that. he deeply respects and is friends with fenris. he did rivalry with sebastian, but in an agree-to-disagree way where they considered each other friends nonetheless until All That happened. he had a more genuine rivalry with aveline though still coloured by their trauma bonding

i THINK those are the main beats of his lore but he’s my most discussed and developed dragon age character so i’m sure i’ve missed some of the assorted junkyard of thoughts

#keir hawke

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devouredbyflame · 12 days

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Good morning! It’s Ari, again.

I might drop by to DM sometime, but since I’m about to work, I didn’t want to be rude and just DM/start a conversation to throw questions at you and run off lol I’d rather DM to get to know someone if that makes sense. I thought it might be more appropriate to drop little questions here if any really drive me nuts while I’m reading your blog in the meantime.

If I ever ask anything you don’t want to share, feel free to say so! I’m trying to understand what I’ve read you say about finding your path yourself and avoiding echo chambers when you should be learning from the Divine, so I’m gonna try to limit my questions, but between my having ADHD, anxiety, and just generally being kind of detail-oriented, I still find myself fixated on specific details a lot

So with that ramble out of the way (sorry, I’m kinda long-winded, I’m sure you noticed in my email lol) my actual question(s) for today!:

(I see how long this got, so for a summary, this jumble of questions is about the likenesses of Deities you mention putting on altars)

In your first post about altar creation, I saw you say one of the things you need is a likeness of the Deity you’re making it for. It might be a silly question, but what really counts as a “likeness”? Is it just anything made with the intention of being His likeness? Or are we supposed to make an intuitive guess? I could see maybe going by personal UPG, but assuming we’re just starting out and not confident in anything like that, trying to make the altar to connect in the first place, I’m wondering how we know what we’re looking for.

Since I’m not able to practice openly at home, but my family knows I was a bigger fan of Hiddleston Loki than the MCU itself, I was thinking of finding a good/affordable figure of MCU Loki. So if the owner of the household rifles through my things, as she’s prone to do, and she finds a candle, a marvel figure and a couple of (to her) random things in a box, she’s more likely to think it’s just a box of knickknacks. But I’m afraid this will be seen as some kind of joke, I don’t want to be too familiar, in case I’ve been wrong about my connecting to Him so far.

Final thought- do Deities even really have human-looking appearances? I see Loki appearing differently to different people, especially as a shapeshifter, but is it really a thing that any of Them look a certain way? Like I’ve read you talk about meeting Him face-to-face when He has possessed people in front of you, and how He’s your roommate/in-and-out-of-your-body way of being with you now. But is there a way you “see” Him? And is that a way He’s appeared to you, in a dream or meditation or something, or is it just kinda a creative idea of how He looks?

Sorry for the length, and any errors! I’d stop to edit it down and fix run-on sentences, but I’m already kinda late starting work (oops). So I hope you have a good day! Hopefully I’ll have time to actually chat this weekend, if you’re open to that!

Hi Ari! You're totally fine. I love answering questions so give me what you got and I can do my best to further clarify for you. And also, I am ADHD so I 100% understand the need for detail-oriented clarification. My numerous questions is how I got to where I am today because I would ask Loki so many things about how stuff works so I can better grasp the nature of the concept. I am more than delighted to share what I've learned, how it works, and why it's been successful and that's kind of the point of my being here.

My answers are also really long-winded and mostly because I have a lot of knowledge and experiences and very few places to share it so bear with me.

So, in regards to the likeness question, I would say anything that is made with the intention of it being the Deity in question would be the best point of reference. However, it doesn't necessarily mean it has to be an obvious representation, just something that is synonymous with Their energy. Like, if you had a candle vaguely in the shape of the Deity in question or a clay model, a doll, or a picture that reminds you of Them, that also works. The purpose is to draw the energy of that particular Deity into the shrine which means you would need to "open the door" to both sides. Like, the Deity would need to know it is for Them as well as you so you can look at it and go, "ah, yes, that is the God in question." You would think They wouldn't care because They know your heart and your intention, but it is easiest when the object is designed with the God in mind.

That being said, I personally had MCU Loki on my altar for a year or two when I first began, knowing Loki probably was aware of my situation and that I needed to be closeted until I had my own place to live. I don't think it would necessarily be a problem if you have Tom Hiddleston instead of Loki Himself. When I got my own place, I got Him a statue carved out of wood and quite a bit of art by various artists I've found who I think draw Him really well.

The whole debate about whether or not Loki cares for MCU Loki itself is complex and I can possibly get into that in more detail if anyone is ever interested. But based on my experiences with Him, He has indicated that no, He doesn't really care for it to be on your shrine. It's fine if that's what you need to be conspicuous. He only really seems to care if you don't ask Him if it's okay. The point, I think, He wants to make is that by asking Him His opinion, He will make it okay because you gave Him your reasoning and didn't just assume. Which makes sense considering a shrine is a Deity's possession and not a devotee's after the point of making it a shrine. So, as long as you're asking His permission to use it on His shrine, I think that's absolutely clear with Him.

I cannot speak for Him, but I sincerely doubt He would ever wish to put you in the way of any danger when it comes to His shrine being made. However, I know Him to be very possessive of His belongings and prefers giving His consent with certain things. If you invite Him when creating a shrine, He will more than likely give you a sense of what you need to be doing for Him and whether or not it's okay. If you don't trust that, using a pendulum, flipping a coin, or other "yes/no" random generators are helpful. I wouldn't worry too much that you are afraid of insulting Him just because you don't have an option.

Just don't ask Him multiple times the same question because that's when He starts giving false answers. It can get aggravating but typically He doesn't like having only one-sided answers and would prefer to say both "yes" and "no" because He tends to swing both ways when talking about the nature of Himself as well as the Gods since it's never only ever just one single way.

I think He does mind Tom Hiddleston being used as His likeness if you have no reason to hide your shrine and if you don't ask His permission to so so He may say "no" but then "yes" later on given His consent and an explanation of your reasoning.

Now, I don't know your situation, obviously, and there's no reason for you to get into more detail about it to some random stranger on the internet but I will point out that having a shrine is a lot less obvious than you would think. People won't know what they are looking at if they are not pagan. I kept my shrine on my desk for the years I was closeted and my ex who was an atheist as well as my Christian parents did not know what they were looking at unless I specifically told them what it was. Even then, they were confused. I think unless the people you live with know what a pagan is or what a shrine should be, you likely are going to be fine even if they go through your belongings.

I recommend keeping it in a shoe box somewhere or an even smaller box that's tucked away somewhere no one will get to it even if they are looking. It's probably for the best regardless because it would keep other energy from getting to it that would be less than savory and could interrupt the energetic transaction between Loki and yourself.

Also, in regards to appearances, no, Loki does not have a physical appearance whatsoever. He is energy and energy does not have a form that we can see clearly with our two eyes. He likes to call Himself an "orb of light" and that He "floats around all day and does not do much of anything on this physical plane except wait around for stuff to happen."

I have seen Him manifest physically before but it is not human-like nor is it remotely something that is a common occurrence. It looks like glimmers of golden light that shines in the corner of my eye and flashes before it can ever be seen fully. My cats see Him all the time, actually, and watch as He zooms around the apartment and plays with them since cats have a keener sense of vision than we do.

So, no, He does not have any actual human-like qualities. However, it is my understanding that the way we perceive Him is translated by various triggers in our brain. Just like how we visualize a person as they are described that we haven't seen before, Loki essentially has a means to assist people with seeing Him who may have trouble recognizing who He is so He gives a common appearance. He's explained to me that when it's important for someone to know who they are looking at, He will appear to them as a lanky ginger with long red hair, golden eyes and pointed ears. But if it's not, then He can show up as anyone He wants to in any way.

So I suppose it's both the way He wants to be seen and also our own brains piecing together visuals that He triggers and we conceptualize as vaguely human but very obviously not given the amount of energy that resonates off of Him. So it's both intentional that He looks the same way to a lot of people while also being intentional when He doesn't. Regardless of where, how, and why He manifests, though, He feels the exact same way all the time and you'll know who He is just by being in His presence. So, I suppose, also, it doesn't truly matter about what He looks like on your shrine.

I hope that answers your questions (probably more info than you ever asked for) but I'm always open to clarifying things here and otherwise and that goes with anyone who stumbles on my blog. That's why I'm here. Also, yes, please DM whenever you want! I love meeting people. It's my favorite. Talking about this shit is my jam.

#anon ask #deity work #shrine #lokean #norse pagan #devotional polytheism #pagan blog #deity worship #paganblr #norse paganism

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kinokoshoujoart · 6 months

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30 days harvest moon posts will resume once i’m on the day i would have posted. so the 24th. (i really should have just started posting in november and used october to prepare… but i was excited to start + i had fun + live and learn)

but uh. i can’t go too long without posting or else i take damage over time. so

#queue tea pie #i got a couple asks and i’m secretly doing some stuff in response heh heh heh. i love you askers #i’m also doing Secret Things but i can’t pass the skill gates for them yet so i’m Practicing #i’m sorry about the halloween chibis…. only one is done i think bc rockaganda took priority #now my hand is dead and so am i #i’m working on a billion things. but i always have more ideas. awful #polls #i luv you all. thanks for putting up with my nonsense #IT’S PLEASE DRAW ROCK IN A MORE RESPECTFUL WAY VS LESS RESPECTFUL WAY…. I’M SORRY IF YOU VOTED MEANING“’DRAW ROCK LESS’ LMAO #if you did PLEASE TELL ME and i’ll change your vote in my manual tally #i’m not sure what these options are but this is not a very serious poll. i just like making polls wheeeeeeee

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yandere-sins · 1 year

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So I thought I’d give a little life-update as there’s a lot going on at the moment and I think it’s visible on my blog as well. Maybe the positives first:

I do really like my new work, I like that I have set hours (even if I do overtime here and there) and though it got incredible stressful the last few weeks, I think the four people that work in my office space are the coolest in the whole company and I love the support I am getting, it’s something I always wanted for my work-life tbh! My dog is also doing very fine, she’s really a total sweetheart and I wouldn’t know what to do without her, and at least I, myself, am doing pretty okay-ish physically, so nothing to complain there.

Now to the negatives.

Unfortunately, my mom’s cancer returned but is quite hard to pinpoint. She went back to an even more aggressive chemotherapy and we’re hoping for the best. Honestly, I don’t wish cancer on anyone, it’s such a tough battle and even just as the primary caretaker it’s been really hard to deal with for me, luckily I have grandparents and a brother who all deal with it and help and support, so that’s good! My mental health though is suffering. It’s biting my own butt now, but I cancelled therapy to focus on work at the beginning of this year and now my therapist is fully booked, so I will have to sit out this month probably. I am telling that because that’s the reason I am struggling with concentrating on one thing for a long time, which includes writing, which explains the fluctuation of posts you are seeing, since I try to get requests and drafts done on the weekend when there’s less stress. Sadly only works like 30% of the time...

Going forward I have decided to indefinitely pause commissions. I have noticed that they put too much pressure with the deadline and expectancy on me when I am already struggling and sometimes need a day to myself. I can’t say when they’ll come back, but thank you all so much for your interest and support, it’s always a pleasure to write your ideas and I never had a bad experience with commission ♥

Good news for Mermay: it’s still happening! ... buuuut I am shortening the story I came up with. I think I was too ambitious with the three routes I teased, so I am trying to figure out how to ensure that it won’t drag out as much as Atreo’s story last year. Unfortunately, the start will be delayed some more, but we were going to celebrate Mer-June anyway, so at this point it probably doesn’t make as much difference (’:

Because the question arose a few times already, I will not be playing Honkai Star Rail. It has a few reasons, but the main one is I don’t have the time. Sorry to everyone who asked about it, but it’s just not the right time for me at the moment! ): I’ll probably be miserable again later when everyone has moved on to it and I am stuck behind but I have to make cuts somewhere ;;

I actually have some commissions and requests that I haven’t released yet, so I will try to schedule some of these in the meantime while I work out how to go about stuff. If you’ve been around for a while you probably know I like routines that’s why it’s always important for me to build them and keep them up. Other than that, I’ll probably focus on Mermay and my own writing projects which will happen rather irregularly. No guarantees on posting, sadly ):

I do realize tho that it just isn’t always possible to keep up frequency of posts and interactions I had when I started this blog, as much as it saddens me. I have to prioritze my real life before my internet presence (and I really need to not feel guilty about taking breaks from everything ever so often ;;), so if you see me vanishing for a few days, it’s just that really.

Thank you everyone who stuck around and supports this blog ♥ There’s another big milestone coming up veeery soon and I am always in awe that so many people would stay to read my silly little stories!! If you have some time and don’t mind waiting for a response, I’m always happy to chat and answer questions, so please don’t hesitate to hit me up!

Thanks everyone ♥

#Admin #Also I found a new editing program that I want to try out soon-ish #if something changes about my writing... it could be my editing ^^'#But Grammarly also now has an AI thingy and bleh #Don't really want to keep supporting it since it's also not really made for non-professional writing stuff

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vamp1r1cjuggalo · 4 months

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Silly post

Also an update, i might be posting fandom stuff a lot less now, at least for the meantime, mostly due to personal reasons but i’m now struggling a lot to even wanna do any fandom stuff and motivation is wack so hopefully i’ll be back to posting fandom stuff eventually.

#imscared #imscared a pixelated nightmare #animal crossing #five nights at freddys #yo noid #spookys jumpscare mansion #vampiric rambling #apologies for the sudden update i’m just not doin too hot rn

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dustbunsinspace · 5 months

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Hi, buns! 🍊 Hope you’ve all been alright in those crappy times.

So much ‘s been going on in the meantime, it’s hard to sum it up quickly, but most importantly I’ve been working extra hard to finally get my own place and I’ll hopefully get the keys by the end of this month ✨🤧 I still can’t believe it’s happening. My very own little rabbit den (can’t wait to build a huge ass shelf to put all the silly turtle- people figurines up there).

I’m still super busy, but have some cute stuff to post, and I really want to answer at least some of the asks, cause I love getting messages from you guys. And also thank you for all the support I got in the meantime, seeing new notes shot an endorphin blast straight to my adhd brain, and it really cheered me up in some tough times 🧡🍊

Alsoo, I’ve made a small Redbubble shop! (Yeah, I know it pays artists literal pennies, but it just makes me super happy to think there is someone walking around with my goofy art on their shirts and stuff. I have an old BioWare-centric redbubble and it always makes my day. And I’m not gonna lie, pocket money is always good as well 😗). Fun thing about it is that I usually post new stuff there before putting it anywhere else, cause it’s extra fun to see how it looks on products. (And, cough, doesn’t trigger my anxiety because no notes, just art looking cute on things).

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palettepainter · 7 months

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I’ve got some traditional doodles and Halloween cake pictures to post when I get back (maybe sooner) but in the meantime here are some Muppet ideas I wanna explore some time

-Raph meeting Fiama. Idk why my brain has latched onto this dynamic, but for some reason I want to have these two interact. Before we left on holiday I rewatched Muppets Tonight and I got to that one episode where Sal gets a book on being a chiropractor. Since Raph is an *actual* chiropractor I think it’d be funny if the these three interacted (maybe Raph gives Sal some pointers)

-Zephyr and Janice hanging out and talking about their moustached husbands, Floyd and Clifford. Zee is pretty confident but I imagine when it’s her and Janice having a girls talk she can get pretty flustered like when talking about Clifford

-Liv and Animal being chaotic. Liv is the same age as Scooter (early/mid twenties, so like 22-23) and I like think Animal is like, maybe five-ish years older then her. He’s a lot younger then the band. They but heads a lot sorta like siblings but they have their moments of being sweet and caring too

-Family stuff with Zephyr, Clifford and Rosa (I like the name Rosa so I’m dubbing their kid that). Nothing in particular I just wanna draw fluffy family stuff

-Lottie with Phoebe Fraggle. I have a small story in mind for how these two meet that I wanna write one day but I gotta finish Pheobe’s design first

-Pirate Anastasia, inspired by gollygeemel’s mermaid AU art. I imagine Anne as a sort of robin-hood of the sea. Running from the marines trying to capture her with the aid of Nemis, a kraken sea witch who ends up getting roped into the chaos. Might draw Liv as a mermaid too inspired by SkippieFritz Wooter art in this AU

-Penny and Fozzie relationship

I know I mentioned I might make Penny Aromantic, but Penny overall can be pretty blunt/grumpy sometimes, and apparently it’s a harmful stereotype that Aromantic characters fall into this trope of being “unloveable/evil” in media. I don’t want Penny to be negative representation so I’ve been debating on her just being Asexual/Trans

Penny likes jokes, including corny, silly ones. Laser told her jokes to cheer her up when they where younger so I think Penny would grow a soft spot for Fozzie pretty quickly

-Some stuff with Tiger (my design for Animal’s ma before he got adopted by Floyd). In one of the Back Stage Pass podcast episodes Animal’s actor said how he, in his interpretation, was purchased from the black market. If Animal did have a ma I imagine she’d stay on the black market while he got sold, and she’d end up in some freak show or something. This is all a loose maybe AU for another AU, I’m torn between exploring the idea or letting Animal’s backstory be a mystery since him being this weird monster creature has always been a big part of his character

But I’ve been imagining the band and Tiger interacting. How at first they’re weary of her but Tiger proves over time that she’s more intelligent that she looks

Maybe of her coming around to trusting the band before she returns home (inspired by HTTYD 3 but one day when the band come to visit her she’s got babus, and Tiger dubs them all sitters by letting her three new rapid babies clamber all over them)

#Muppets #The Muppets #Muppet OC #Ideas

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bahbzxxx · 1 year

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Before anybody gets confused…THIS IS NOT CANON IN THE SLIGHTEST.

THIS. 👏IS JUST. 👏AN EXCUSE. 👏TO SIMP FOR VENTI. 👏WHILE MAKING IT. 👏AS COMPLICATED. 👏AND DRAMATIC. 👏AND CONVOLUTED. 👏AS POSSIBLE.

In short, this is just a silly little au.

👏

I did this all in one sitting so yes thank you my grammar is atrocious

So let’s consider harbinger Venti’s situation.

Because in BarbzLANDIA, He’s canon now. Don’t @ me he moved into my silly little brain with his thousands of suitcases that he stuffs in his hat somehow and I kinda need his rent money🙄🤌💸

So consider the following:

How tf are people going to react to lord Barbatos then?

- The fatui would be petty, sis. The more mondstadt thinks they’ve been abandoned by their archon of freedom in exchange for this new wackadoodle OP harbinger, the more people will loose faith in him as their archon and not only will he lose power, but he will gain disappointment.

We Venti stans already know this poot likely Carries way more guilt and truama and depression than he lets even the traveler in on…so this is why it pleases the higher ups of the fatui and abyss to see this happen, especially since HES now the harbinger who’s ruining everything.

(Don’t you just want to spit on them and hurl sheakspearean insults at them?) (I know I would!!!!!and that’s just the start!!!)

(Why am I so mad at fanon depictions of characters I am making I will never know, but in the meantime, we tread on)

Timing? - what’s mondstadt like? What about our favorite characters? Tf they up to?

Like, it already had fatui and stuff so it would all just be blown way out of proportion. Like, imagine the fatui have been in there longer…(I think I made an imagine post a few months ago where mondstadt is suffering because Venti got *officially infected*, and because he’s the wind, the weather and much more is affected…so the fatui…they kinda just…infiltrate casually over decades, at least until they can catch the anemo archon at his lowest and have that power over him)

For the most part, at the point that I’m thinking the story would take place… fatui soldiers and the knights of favonius have basically melded into one group. Those who didn’t like the change and could leave left…but some people couldnt, for the good of Mondstadt.

The church of favonius, as time goes on, gets a lot of flack for supporting a god who clearly no longer cares or maybe even exists, in the eyes of the people who have seen it’s fall.

(It’s been rumored that, though it is rumored he is of mondstadt descent…the recent lord harbinger in residence has not stepped foot in that cathedral.-could he be ashamed of his actions…or is there something bigger behind this?)

(Maybe I’ll get to my ideas for other characters in a different post but y’all know where diluc is goin’)

(He’s going to the swimming pool. He’s gonna go swimming, and then will get a slushie. What he doesn’t finish he will give to his pet bird. His bird likes grape. He doesn’t. They will feud. He will appease the bird and give him grape. He will then get a la croix. Then he will go home and stream BNHA and act like hes todoroki, only to stop for obvious, blaringly obvious, reasons. That will be all. We tread on.)

What is the extent of Venti’s power in this? Would he have any at all?

Though he knows they do it to taunt him, he actually does.

His wishlist is simple-

1. Mondstadt is safe.

And those with power over him know that. They also know he may be more powerful than them…but he actually has class, and thinks before he acts.

So…they actually kind of trust him to be a good harbinger. They let him run mondstadt the way he see fit…he can’t just leave and give them freedom…

It Iitersll sucks cause he has to be the tyrant so that nobody else will be the tyrant and do worse things…

As long as it serves the Tsaritsa and her plans. If not…trust he will be dealt with 😥

(More on that here maybe)

Though many statues of the seven have been defunct for a while, he would still be able to gain his own power from at least one…because technically, they already have his gnosis. It just so happens that it’s still inside of him. They have him wrapped around their finger by this point…

Misc: necessary to include

Venti would be so trusted by the fatui at this point that they put him in charge of Childe. No…childe does not bump up a place. He’s still 11.

You can imagine how interesting their interactions would be.

(You can imagine how offended he is)

Diluc is the token fugitive before the traveler and posse(posse being paimon and the Windblume in question) shows up in mondstadt looking for their sibling

#harbinger Venti #harbinger Venti au #corrupt Venti au #what if #poor Venti #venti needs a hug

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beauty-and-passion · 1 year

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For the survey thing, are you planning on making a list of responses given and/or using responses to write up a fan script yourself? I apologize if that’s a dumb question I’m just confused

That's not a stupid question at all, don't worry! Yep, the idea is to collect as many ideas/themes/suggestions as possible to do a fan writing. I am talking specifically about "fan writing", because writing the full scripts for all episodes:

will take too much time

I am not American, so I will inevitably end up not making as many references/puns as an English-speaking person would

It's not my job to write a full script, it's Mr. Sanders' job

What I will do instead is something like this:

Plan season 3 (decide which themes will be developed and in how many episodes)

Write an extensive summary of every episode and how I want them to go (i.e. flow of the conversation, how it should be developed, what the characters should do/say etc.)

This is why I am collecting themes and ideas now: I am only one and my memory isn't perfect, so I will inevitably end up forgetting something. Also, this fan writing is a sort of "gift" from a fan for the fans, so it's only fair to involve as many people as possible and to write something that will include the most appreciated/requested ideas.

So the survey has multiple goals: to help me plan season 3, to collect as many ideas as possible, to get new ideas and to see which concepts are the most requested and therefore should be more developed.

Until now I've collected 50 answers and, wow, I can't express in words how much that means to me. Your feedback is awesome and deeply appreciated, so thank you all SO MUCH for what you are doing.

These 50 answers are already helping me plan some stuff, they are telling me clearly what people want to see more (by now, Virgil and Janus' backstory has been requested by the entire world so I will pay extra attention to it) and some of your suggestions are A-MA-ZING. I can't stress enough how much I love you all, because some of your ideas are wonderful - and I'm not talking just about the serious ones, but about the silly ones too. They are so great!

I will keep the survey open to everyone for the entire month of May, in order to collect as many suggestions as I can. But in the meantime, I will still give you something! And that something includes:

a headcanon post (it won't be included in the season 3 planning, it's my own headcanon)

all the analysis for the remaining episodes I haven't talked about yet

These posts are all written, I just have to proofread and post them. And speaking of the analyses, one of them includes a rewrite too, so that will hopefully give you an idea of how I plan to write season 3.

So, well, if you're interested, just stick around because more stuff will come very soon ;)

#sanders sides #ask #blog updates #thank you a lot for this ask #I hope it clarifies some doubts #I have big plans #I just need big time to develop them #;P

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capricioussun · 8 months

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I wanted to make a little infographic but since I take too long to do stuff, in the meantime, here’s a little post!

Stuff I’m cool with & Stuff I’m less cool with

• Nicknames/using my “real” name - yeah man go for it, love nicknames, and anyone’s absolutely welcome to call me Ace, too

• Gendered Terms - yes also, but I do slightly prefer neutral or masculine ones

• Dms/messaging/asks/tagging - welcome from anyone! I’m just a silly guy, I love talking to people✨ But I will ask you be 18+ if you add me on discord (it’s in my pinned!) just for my own peace of mind <3

• Fanart (???!!!) - super welcomed! It’s an honor! But there’re a few little side notes:

-Please don’t us any of my interpretations/designs for RP, self shipping, suggestive/nsft stuff, or personal stuff (like multiverse fics or anything you’d essentially have to make your own version of my versions to use lol)

(There are some exceptions to the above stuff, like if we’ve talked abt it and I’ve given express consent/permission, but those are the general guidelines otherwise <3)

• Requests - obv I reblog prompts and stuff all the time, but if you want something more specific/ outside of that, you’re free to send em, but I make no promises I’ll ever get around to it! Tho my commissions are usually open so you’re welcome to hmu if it’s something you’d really like to see me make lol

• Using or Reposting stuff I’ve made - absolutely no reposting ever please! But if you’d like to use any of my art as an icon or smth please ask first, I’ll probably say yes!

If there’s anything I’m forgetting feel free to shoot an ask, but uuuhhh yeah! :*) don’t forget to hydrate n stretch n stuff 👉👉

#sunny with clouds #might put this under a read more it looks so long to me

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skyward-floored · 1 year

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I'm curious about Accidental domestication and of course i'm a sucker for True form XD

Accidental Domestication

A bunch of honestly silly oneshots (three of which are already posted!) that deal with the chain mistaking random wolves for Wolfie. Every time I’d finish a oneshot for it I’d get another idea, and it’s happened yet again XD I’m in the process of writing a fourth one with Warriors and Time. Here’s a bit of it!

Time suddenly let out a loud laugh, breaking his thoughts, and Warriors slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Time shh, are you trying to get us caught?” he hissed, and Time blinked at him, eye looking oddly milky from what the captain could see of it.

“M’ not getting us caught,” he huffed once Warriors removed his hand. Then he let out a high-pitched giggle, and Warriors stared at him incredulously. Time never... giggled. That drug was hitting him hard, and fast, it must have been some powerful stuff.

Time’s head lolled a bit, and he blinked up at Warriors, a goofy smile on his face.

“The cuccoos never listen anyway,” he assured, flopping a hand up and patting his cheek. “They just gliiiide away. Stop worryin’ about it.”

True Form (the twilight turns)

Ah true form. I’m rather stuck on the next chapter, it’s been giving me quite a bit of grief 😓 But I work on it now and then, I’ll break through the block eventually! In the meantime I’ve been working a little on after-game events, lots of fun stuff there hehe

Here’s a bit I’ve managed to write for the next chapter :)

“All right,” he promises, and Rusl’s face splits into a bright smile.

“I knew you’d do it!” he says excitedly, and Link can’t help but return his smile as the older man gives his shoulder a warm squeeze. “And I have just the thing here to help you cross the gorge.”

And Rusl pulls out a shiny, sparkling, golden... cucco.

Link stares at it blankly, and Midna bursts into peals of laughter in his shadow, laughing so hard Link is shocked Rusl doesn’t hear her.

“...Do you doubt my partner's skills?” Rusl asks when Link forgets to say anything, and he hesitantly shifts his feet, not exactly wanting to say it himself. “He flies like a dream! Believe me! You will definitely make it across the gorge. Wait and see, my doubting friend.”

Rusl hands Link the golden bird, seemingly clueless of Midna’s howling laughter.

#thanks!#answers from the floor #nancyheart11 #wip ask game #wip #true form au #accidental domestication

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coexistentialism · 10 months

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hi! I appreciate your response and it does help me to know you can relate that that experience as a did system! I thought maybe I was being dramatic like “ah this is just a normal singlet thing for sure I’m so silly” but no others feel this way too not just singlets. do u think singlets could feel those identities in the way you and I described? the thing is there IS dissociation and early trauma and identities feelings.. unsure about amnesia but that stuff if there. but those symptoms alone still doesn’t convince me they are alters for sure. I’m on my “I’m a system! Wait no I’m not! Wait yes I am” moment (for years now lol) not asking u to diagnose me and I’m not saying I’m one for sure but knowing that systems can relate to my experience helps me learn. I can’t help the feeling of “no thjs is just singlets having different aesthetics/parts of their personality why are u trying to make yourself be a system” how did u shake that feeling?

In the original post, I said that I had no idea how a singlet person would experience these things, and the same applies here, unfortunately. I got no idea how a singlet might experience identity shifts like that, I couldn't even guess. I'm sure that the experience I described isn't exclusive to DID, but I wouldn't know what those experiences would look like for somebody who doesn't have DID, unfortunately.

I felt the same way though - "this isn't DID, these aren't alters, I just have 'identity hyperfixations'" or *insert another excuse*

It's gotten easier with me since my diagnosis and since I've learned much more about DID to better understand it. Like I was held back for a good year or two from understanding myself better with regards to DID because I was still under the impression that DID switching would involve me passing out and some whole ass other person taking control and introducing themself, like demon possession in movies.

After I started to understand that I am an alter - I am always SOME alter - and after I started to become more comfortable with recognizing the switches and changes, I started to become more comfortable with simply acknowledging the symptoms instead of caring about the alters. And that's a huge thing that a lot of people try to explain - to not care about "what" diagnosis you could have and not care so much about the alters aspects, but to focus on the symptoms.

And honestly doing that has helped me 20 times more than anything else I was doing has.

I've learned a lot more about myself - why certain things trigger me, or NOTICING that certain things trigger me and acknowledging them as triggering, instead of ignoring it and downplaying it and denying that something triggered me. I'm better able to see the symptoms and feel VALIDATED for once.

So for example, if I have an experience where I felt really angry and upset, and then that mood instantly changed and I no longer cared - that's a switch. And I can better able recognize it as a switch and take note of it and anything else I might've noticed. Just noticing when switches occur, and noticing if there are certain triggers that trigger those switches has been really helpful for me.

I still know, like, nothing about my system and alters, but noticing that certain topics and such trigger certain behaviors, typing styles, speaking styles, etc. has been so much more helpful for me than trying to focus on "okay, what is this alter's name and how is he distinctly different from this other alter and I need to know who I am all the time-"

This might not be helpful for everyone, this is just helpful for myself right now, as I'm slowly starting to build up stabilization in the meantime, and I'm definitely not trying to claim that this is THE way to go, but more like "take what helps and leave what doesn't" situation here lol

Other people recommend finding general coping skills and grounding techniques, but I wouldn't know what to say there as those aren't really things I utilize currently. I would in the future, but right now I am just a person trying to vibe, I have no idea what my coping skills would like or how I would know that I'm dissociating in order for grounding skills to even come in handy (my therapist and I are still working up to just me figuring things out right now and starting to recognize things better)

#actuallyosdd #my posts #actuallydid #osdd system #did system #inbox

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