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dragon-kazansky · 3 years

Text

Made with love | Helmut Zemo

Chef Zemo AU! 👨‍🍳

Gender neutral reader

Collage by @realremyd

Huge thank you to @rumblelibrary for helping me out with this chapter!

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Part 5

Wanda basically threw you out after breakfast. You were at Escorpión Morado bright and early. The restaurant wasn't open for another hour yet.

It was as if he had been waiting for you. The moment you reached the door, Zemo opened them and let you in. He was smiling at you instantly.

"Morning."

"Good morning."

You smile back and let him lock up again before he leads you into the back. He lets you put your things down and takes you into the kitchen.

There's no one about. Just the two of you.

Suddenly you're feeling rather nervous.

On the counter is everything you needed for today, but Zemo ignored all of that as he brought in some coffee for you. You smiled as he handed over the cup, his fingers brushing against yours. You tried not to let it show that the little touch had affected you.

He had done it on purpose, not that he would tell you that. He just wanted an excuse to touch you a little. Zemo's way of flirting was less obvious sometimes.

He smiles that charming smile at you.

"I'm glad you agreed to help," he says, smile not once faltering.

"You're hard to say no to."

He likes that answer. He chuckles and sips his coffee.

"What are we making?"

"Paella! A proper paella."

"A proper paella?"

"A good paella takes a couple hours to make. I have everything I need, we just have to make it. I'm going to teach you how to cook like a chef," he winks at you.

"When is he coming?"

"This afternoon. That's why I asked you here so early."

"I don't mind. I'm happy to help, though I'm not sure how helpful I'll actually be," you offer and awkward smile. You feel out of place in his kitchen.

His kitchen. This was his domain. Helmut knew it inside and out. He knew every corner. He knew where every utensil lived, every pot and pan, every herb and spice. This was his kingdom and he had let you in.

It felt like an honour to be here.

"Should we start?" You ask, looking at the items he had set out. You felt rather intimidated.

Zemo glances up at the clock.

"Not yet. We have time."

"Alright, I trust you," you smile softly.

"Good. I have one condition while you're in my kitchen."

"What is it?" You felt even more nervous now.

"You have to call me chef. It's the only name I have in here," he grins, mischievously.

Your face felt warm.

"Yes, chef," you say, almost shyly.

"That's more like it," he says, sipping more of the delicious coffee he had made.

You had no idea how you were going to survive in here. With the constant concentration you would be putting in, to the way he looked at you, and now calling him chef, you're not sure your heart could handle it all. It felt as if there was a spell over you and you couldn't break it.

When you had both finished your coffee, he took the cups and put them to the side. He disappeared for a moment, only to return with aprons in hand. He smiles as be holds one out to you. You take it and put it on.

"Are you ready to make something so delicious, you'll never want to eat anything else again?" He asks, chuckling.

"That's quite the statement, chef."

For now he will pretend you actually calling him that wasn't sending his heart soaring and his mind racing. Instead he will act as normally as he can as he spends these next few hours with you.

"It's the truth. Until you have tried a real paella, you haven't experienced anything," he winks at you.

Helmut preps the paella pan.

"I've prepped everything, we just have to cook it."

"I've never cooked paella before," you tell him, looking at him in worry.

"Don't panic, I'm right here. I'll guide you."

That smile he gives you reassures you. You're in good hands.

He pours in the olive oil and sprinkles salt in a circle around the edge of the pan. He's smiling as he does it. You should be watching his cooking, but your eyes are drawn to his face instead. You could look at him for hours.

He knows you're looking. He can feel your eyes on him. He turns his head slightly, eyes flicking to you. His smile becomes a smirk as he meets your gaze.

You become flustered.

"The chicken and rabbit, if you would," he nods over to where meat was waiting.

You hand them over. He pops them into the pan with a flourish and looks at you with a little grin.

"We're going to brown the meat, so in the meantime, tell me what you and your friend have been up to."

"She took me bowling yesterday. She used to go with her brother."

"Ah yes, I know where she took you. I've never actually been."

"No?"

"No. I have spent a majority of my life in a kitchen," he chuckles. The sound makes you smile.

"I can believe that. Have you always wanted to be a chef?"

"Yes. Ever since I was a boy. I take pride in what I do. If it's not perfect, it doesn't get served, and nothing I have ever made has never not been perfect."

You smile as he grins at you. Those are easy words to believe.

"I wish I could cook like you."

"You could if you learnt how."

"I never seem to have the time to learn," you say, softly. He glances at you, seeing a longing look in your eyes as you look at the meat in the pan.

"Would you like a go at turning them? They need to be brown on both sides."

"Uh, sure."

"Don't worry, I'll be right here."

You take over from him. Zemo stands so close next to you, eyes on the food as you turn the meat over. You're so very aware of how close he is to you. You're doing everything you can to keep focused on the cooking.

After 20 minutes pass by, he takes over again. He pushes all the meat the sides of the pan and nods over to the green beans he had prepped earlier.

"Could you pass me those, please?"

You nod and hand them over. He puts them into it the centre of the pan, right in the middle of the ring of chicken and rabbit.

He sautès them.

"I could teach you to cook. Honestly. It would be my pleasure to be your teacher."

"That's a nice offer, but I'm here with Wanda. I should spend as much time as possible with her."

"Except, you're here now," he smirks.

"Well, yeah... you asked me here."

"And I'm asking you again."

"I'll have to go back home at some point. How much could you teach me in just a few days?"

He looks you in the eye.

"A lot, but what if you didn't go home. What if you stayed here. You could find a home in Sokovia, I could see you every day."

You look away with a chuckle.

"I would say you're crazy."

"Somebody has to be. Without crazy people, nothing would get done. If you go home, I'll be left here missing you."

"You would miss me?"

"Of course I would. You're special."

He says this without looking at you, concentrating on the cooking, but you knew he meant it. It was the way he said it.

Helmut adds garlic and then butter beans.

"This already looks so good," you say, smiling at the both the look and scent of the food.

"Wait until it's finished."

It feels a shame to know this was for Tony Stark. You would love nothing more than to dig in to this paella yourself.

"Would you like the honours of adding the paprika?"

You nod and add it to his instructions. You add the crushed tomatoes and watch as he mixes everything together.

Now he adds the water. Being the professional he is, he knows exactly the ratio to add. He has very obviously done this many times before. You're almost mesmerized by him.

He lets it simmer.

"If you did move here, you wouldn't have to worry about a job. You would be very welcome in my restaurant."

"You're serious about this, aren't you?" You look at him.

"Sí."

You smile softly.

"I can't just up and leave everything."

"Do you have someone waiting for you back home?" He asks, avoiding looking at you. It would make sense to him that you would have. He should have checked before hand, because now he feels a fool.

"No."

Nevermind. He's over the moon.

"Then why are you hesitating?"

"Because I don't know what I would do here. You're offering me a job, you're asking me to move out here. You don't even really know me. I'm just someone you met last year while on my holiday."

"I know enough about you to know you're special and magnificent. I know enough to like you. I would hate to say goodbye not knowing when or if you would return."

"I've really made an impact on you, haven't I?"

"Sí," he grins at you again.

"Since you're being so honest with me, then I suppose it's only fair I'm honest with you."

"Please."

"You have also made an impact on me. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since we met. I'm in love with your food, your restaurant. I admire everything you have done to keep your father's business alive. I love your country and want nothing more than to stay."

"So stay."

"I... I don't think I can."

He looks back at the food, lowering the heat to let it simmer some more. He thought he was so close to having you, but perhaps it's just not meant to be.

"Can't blame a man for trying."

You hate the way he sounded so defeated. It didn't suit him at all.

"Helmut..."

"Ah ah, what did I say?" He looks at you, turning that confidence back on.

"Chef, right."

"Yes. I only have one name in my kitchen, remember it."

Helmut adds the rice to perfection. He puts down the wooden spoon, that he had used to mix everything, and stands over it. Now it's all about the heat.

Zemo glances at you. You're looking at the pan. He uses your distraction as a moment to admire you.

You're so beautiful. So stunning.

He wants you to stay so badly. It's so very selfish of him, but he wants it. He's not prepared to let you go, not when he wants to see you every single day, speak to you every single day, teach you, work with you, be around you every single day.

You're something so special and this chef is so worried he will lose you.

You're looking at him. He turns his head quickly to adjust the heat.

He knows the exact moment it's done.

"This is a paella," he says, smiling down at the finished project. You smile at it. It smells wonderful.

Before you can day anything, Sam enters the kitchen.

"It's almost time."

Looking up at the clock, you hadn't noticed how much time had passed. Helmut had cute a lot of the time off by preparing the ingredients before hand, but cooking the paella took up quite a bit of time.

"You make sure the table is perfect, Sam. We will bring out the rest momentarily."

Sam nods and heads back out front. You removes your apron, placing it next to Helmut's on the counter and watch as he sorts himself out.

"How do I look?" He asks, looking at you.

"Handsome as always, chef."

He grins, winking at you. He swipes at your cheek quickly, brushing away something you couldn't see. He won't tell you there wasn't anything there, he just wanted an excuse to touch you in some way.

"Shall we?"

"You want me to come with you?" You ask, shocked me would even want you there.

"Of course. We did this together, we should see it through together."

You smile.

Helmut holds out his hand. You take it. It's bigger than yours, warm too. He leads you out front.

Tony Stark enters the building with another man. They both look around the place. You both stop to greet them near the entrance. Zemo doesn't let go of your hand as he smiles at the two men.

"Welcome to Escorpión Morado. I am Helmut Zemo, the owner and the chef," he smiles as introduces himself.

"We've met, but this Stephen Strange. He's investing in my restaurant. Who is this?" Stark turns to you.

Zemo let's go of your hand in favour of placing it on your back as he smiles at you.

"This is Y/N, a dear friend of mine who has helped me prepare your meal for the day."

Tony looks you up and down.

"This way, if you would." Sam guides the two men to the table that been set up specifically for them. With a nod from Sam, Zemo goes back into the kitchen to fetch the paella. Sam serves them drinks.

You stand there, looking between them both.

Both men a wearing expensive looking suits, and they smell expensive too. It seems strange to you that these two men are opening a restaurant. They didn't come off as the foodie types... more businessmen.

Sure, owning a restaurant is half business, but it should also be full of passion, love and life. It's more than just business.

"Does he pay you well?"

"I'm sorry?" You look at Stark.

"Does he pay well?"

"I, uh... I don't work for him. I'm just helping him today."

"Do you cook?"

"Not on this scale."

"At least you're good looking," he sighs, looking at you over the frame of his shades.

Sam clears his throat, looking at you. You find yourself moving to stand next to him. He smiles softly at you, so you smile back, silently thanking him.

Helmut returns.

Stark and Strange watch as places the paella pan on the table and stands back.

"What's this?"

You frown. How could he not recognise such an iconic dish. Even if you hadn't been travelling around Europe last year, you would know how to recognise a paella.

"Paella. A real paella. Dig in."

"From the pan?"

"No other way to eat it. This is traditionally how paella is eaten. You'll enjoy it."

Stark and Strange look at each other.

They dig in.

"Make sure to get some of the socarrat from the bottom. It's delicious!"

You smile at the way he encourages them, but neither man looks impressed.

Helmut stands with you and Sam as the two gentleman eat.

The seconds tick by incredibly slowly. The two men look at one another as they eat. There's a silent conversation taking place, you can feel Zemo becoming nervous the longer it goes on. You reach out and brush your hand with his. He looks down at your hands, taking yours in his softly.

You offer him a smile.

Both men stand from the table, you both turn to look at them, burrowing your brow at them. They dab at their mouths with their fancy handkerchiefs and turn to you.

"Well, that's something anyway. Good to know we don't have much competition around here. Thank you for your time, we shall be on our way now."

Stark drops an envelope on the table.

You can feel Zemo's hand grip yours a bit tighter now. He's angry.

Both men make their leave without saying anything more. Once they cross the threshold, Zemo storms off into the kitchen without a word.

"Helmut!"

He doesn't look back.

Glancing at Sam, he nods at you. You hurry after Zemo, but stop when you reach the door. Crashing sounds come from within. An angry yell. Things clattering to the floor.

You push open the door quickly.

Helmut pushes everything off the countertops, throwing dishes at the wall. He grips his hair with one hand, messing up the neat style it had previously been resting in.

"Mierda!"

You would find his Spanish endearing if not for the word itself, or the fact he was beyond angry.

Tony Stark had insulted him in the worst way possible.

"Helmut..."

He stops, back turned to you. He runs a hand down his face, using the other one to hold his weight as he leans against the nearest counter.

"He's wrong. You are competition. No food compares to what you make, and I'm not just saying that. He will never be able to make anything that compares to anything you make. Do you know how I know? Because you make your food with love. You enjoy every dish you put out. You make your own food in your own restaurant."

He doesn't say anything, just listens.

"Tony Stark has nothing compared to Helmut Zemo, and soon he will see that."

Zemo turns around slowly. He looks at you. All rage melts from his eyes when they land on you. He sighs softly.

"Thank you."

You smile.

He doesn't smile back, but you know he is truly grateful.

Sam enters the kitchen, the envelope from before now open in his hand. You look at him, taking in the expression on his face.

"I think you'll want to read this."

"What is it?" Helmut asks.

"An invitation."

You share a look with Zemo. Suddenly a cold sweat runs down your back. Dread fills every bone in your body.

Helmut steps forward and takes it from Sam.

You wait as he silently reads it.

He looks up at you.

"We're invited to dinner."

@namethathasnotbeentaken @belle82devart @cathrin2405 @lieutenantn @wilder-fangirl @latenightartist-author @lucky-luck-lucky @hb8301 @charistory @thatoneartgalsstuff @thesuitkovian @malkaviangirl @zemosimp420 @realremyd @the-chaotic-cow @lostghostgirl94 @zafiro-draco @lazygurl05 @pinkcutiepiee @goddessofmischief03 @whovianayesha @myybebe @awesomesauce-abbie @that-stupid-head-tilt-thing @zemo-is-my-muse @nonamec0s @apparrio @scuttle-buttle @alex-the-nb @my-blood-is-maple-syrup

#helmut zemo x reader #zemo x reader #baron helmut zemo #helmut zemo #marvel #au #chef zemo au

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boasamishipper · 3 years

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robisanya + we were supposed to make fettuccini but you’re a child that likes to start food fights apparently

The Pre-Match Pasta Party (trademark Ted Lasso) was at Isaac's house this time, and he'd broken everyone into teams of two and assigned each duo their own pasta dishes, with a hundred quid and the first shower for a week as the prize to the best chefs, and the last showers for a week (with the only available shower being the one with the bad water pressure) for the worst chefs. Coach Beard, being an eighth Italian and - at some point in his long and checkered career - a former sous chef for Massimo Bottura, would be judging. The pressure was on.

As they'd been living together for over a year, Sam was paired with Dani, and they'd been instructed to make fettuccine carbonara. Both had been pleased by this development and their assignment. Then the first batch of pasta came out too rubbery and the second and third were somehow simultaneously undercooked and overcooked, leaving Sam more frustrated than confident about their chances of winning.

"What are we doing wrong here?" Sam looked at the recipe they'd printed out. "Did you add olive oil and salt to the water this time?"

"You said you were going to do that this time!"

"No, I asked you to - "

"No, vida," Dani said, gesturing with both hands like he was conjuring receipts of their verbal conversation from thin air. "You said you would do that, because the last time you said I put in too much and that was what made the pasta slimy."

Sam turned the burners off, feeling guilty about the sauce that had been simmering in the other pan for far too long. Would they have to start over for that too? "My love," he said. "If I ever again complain about the quality of restaurant pasta, I want you to hit me over the head with the nearest blunt object."

"Fourth time is the charm," Dani said brightly. Sam heard him open the pantry again. "Or it would be if we had any more pasta."

"What?" Sam turned. His stomach was thrilled to have something new to twist about. "I thought you said you bought - "

Dani threw a handful of parmesan cheese at Sam's face.

For a second, all Sam could do was blink, stunned, which faded into determination at the smug, amused smirk Dani wore. "Oh," he said. "Very cute. You are a dead man."

Dani grabbed the bowl of shredded parmesan cheese and took off to the other side of the island, and Sam pulled the bag of cilantro toward him and tossed a handful of it at Dani. More of their ammunition ended up on the island counter than it did on either of their bodies, and Sam grabbed the bowl filled with the remaining egg mixture just as Dani started squirting olive oil at him with the squeeze bottle. He rounded the island and tackled Dani around the middle, straddled him at the waist, and poured the egg mixture into his hair - which earned him immediate retaliation when Dani managed to reach for the squeeze bottle that had been knocked out of his hand and squirted olive oil right into Sam's face.

Spluttering, Sam pinned him to the tiles by his wrists. "Do you give?"

"Never," Dani said, but he was laughing so hard that he could barely get the word out. Sam was laughing too, so he couldn't judge. "You look very handsome. Parmesan suits you."

"I'll kill you."

"No, you won't. You love me."

"They are not mutually exclusive feelings," Sam said, but relented at Dani's arched eyebrows. "But I do love you more than I want to kill you."

"Romantic," Dani said, and Sam released his wrists so he could kiss the smile right off his face. He tasted like olive oil and egg and butter and all of the pasta they had tried so hard to get right, and even with egg yolk in his hair and cilantro stuck to his face he was still the most beautiful man Sam had ever seen. "Sam?"

Sam broke the kiss, but stayed close, kissing Dani's neck instead. "Mm?"

Dani's hands slid up the back of Sam's shirt. "Do you think olive oil can be used as lube?"

Sam cracked up. "No," he said, then hesitated. Their gazes both landed on the squeeze bottle centimeters away from them. "Well..."

"We have forty-five minutes to find out."

"And another batch of pasta to make." Dani groaned, and Sam kissed his nose. "What happened to the fourth time being the charm?"

"It will be," Dani said. "But if it is a choice of making love with you or making pasta with you..."

Sam couldn't say that the choice was difficult for him either. "One more try," he said. "Fifteen minutes. And then," he punctuated the statement with another kiss. "You can have your way with me."

"We have to be at Isaac's at seven."

"We can be fashionably late."

"Mi vida," Dani said, his smile brightening his eyes and spreading across his entire face. "I love the way you think."

#ted lasso #ted lasso fic #sam obisanya #dani rojas #sam x dani #robisanya #my fics #my writing #thanks for asking!#don't worry they do not actually use olive oil as lube #it is Not Sanitary #and they know better #they arrive fashionably late with fettuccine carbonara that is actually pretty good #moe and jan's pasta is deemed The Best #and jamie and colin's is deemed The Worst. they almost set colin's kitchen on fire trying to boil water. Help Them.

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thevintagebluebird · 3 years

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Unpinned - Seared Fish with Creamed Kale and Leeks

Hello everyone - it’s been a minute. And Allan has been frequently playing NPR podcasts out loud. So hey! Welcome to the end of the longest winter ever to exist! We made it! I lost my energy to cook for a while there but I’m slowly getting back into it, usually sans instructions - I also subscribed to the NY Times and so now y’all are getting a newspaper recipe. We’re full adulting now. Buckle up.

Seared Fish with Creamed Kale and Leeks! Ah crap, I’ve just realize this is two NY Times recipes in a row. I promise the next one will be a handwritten recipe straight from my grandma. She just bought me a new safety mandolin and things are about to get LIT in my kitchen as a result. Safely. Anyway.

Verdict: Is the Pintrest photo complete bullshit? Yes. But to be fair, this was a complete struggle meal for me that I did not adequately prepare for and I used freakin’ frozen cod so like what did I expect.

Is it crazy expensive/time consuming/confusing? I classify the NY Times recipes as ‘intermediate’; I found this to have what felt like more steps than necessary, and took a while. It wasn’t too expensive except that kale and leeks are on my shopping list maybe once every five years, and non-frozen fish would’ve been well worth the money.

Does it taste good? YEAH. Way better than it had any right to taste. You’ll understand why later.

Seared Fish with Creamed Kale and Leeks

INGREDIENTS

4 (5- to 6-ounce) Arctic char or other mild fish fillets, such as salmon

Kosher salt and black pepper

1 ½ pounds curly kale

3 tablespoons unsalted butter

1 large leek (about 1/2 pound), trimmed, white and pale greens quartered lengthwise then thinly sliced

6 large fresh thyme sprigs

3 garlic cloves, minced

1 cup heavy cream

1 ½ teaspoons Dijon mustard

1 teaspoon chicken or vegetable stock concentrate, like Better Than Bouillion

Cooked white rice or pearl couscous, warmed, for serving

2 tablespoons olive oil

Prepare your fish: Pat the fish dry, then salt the skin side to help draw out moisture. Set on a plate and refrigerate, uncovered.

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil over high. Prepare your kale: Pull the leaves off the stems and tear leaves into bite-size pieces. Wash vigorously, drain, then set aside.

In a medium saucepan, melt the butter over medium. Add the leek, thyme and garlic, season with salt and pepper, and cook, stirring frequently, until soft, about 7 minutes.

Stir in the cream and bring to a boil over high. Continue to cook on high until thickened, about 5 minutes. Using a fine-mesh sieve set over a liquid measuring cup or small bowl, strain the sauce, pressing to extract as much liquid as possible. (You should have about 1/2 cup sauce.) Set aside the solids and return the sauce to the saucepan. Whisk in the mustard and stock concentrate, and season with salt and pepper. Cover and set aside.

Discard the thyme sprigs and stir the cooked leek mixture into cooked rice, if desired. Season to taste with salt and pepper.

Once the sauce is done, blanch the kale in the boiling water until just wilted, about 2 minutes. Transfer to a colander to drain and rinse under cold water. Once cool enough to handle, squeeze out the excess liquid. Add to the strained cream, then season with salt and pepper. Cover, and warm over low, stirring occasionally.

Cook the fish: Heat the oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high. Pat the fish dry a second time, then season the skin with pepper, and the flesh with salt and pepper. Add to the hot oil, skin-side down, and cook until the skin is crispy and golden, about 3 to 4 minutes. Carefully flip the fish and cook until the outside starts to turn golden, but the thickest part of the fish is still slightly translucent, about 3 minutes.

Divide the rice (if using), creamed kale and fish among plates and serve immediately.

So here’s what you need! Sort of! You’ll notice I have store brand yellow mustard instead of dijon, coconut milk instead of cream, frozen cod instead of fresh char, no fresh thyme, and I forgot to photograph my (brown not white) rice. Like I said, this one was an unprepared-for struggle.

Our beloved, trusty, 15 year old CVS rice cooker. Hasn’t failed me yet.

My sous chef rushing to help get the dishes unloaded so I can have some space in our new kitchen! It has counters mounted facing each other with just enough room for a Rew and an Allan to get precisely in each other’s way.

Do the ‘ol cold water dethaw on your bland fish. You couldn’t even remember to thaw the fish properly. You probably don’t deserve to be attempting a NY Times recipe. What were you thinking.

Pretend you have any idea how to make kale edible. The stem seems hard so shred the leafy bits off? The smug smile is a lie.

This kale will be edible right?! Definitely not curly, definitely not as much as the recipe called for.

Leeks! I actually LOVE leeks, I just never interacted with them growing up and don’t really understand which parts you’re supposed to chop/cook/eat and which are meant to be tossed. It’s easy with a carrot - cut off the green and eat the orange. But leeks are just ombre gradients of green then suddenly white? We eat it all? Are some parts better than others? How much is TOO much leek? Special appearance in the background by fancy chocolates from Salem.

Pardon my blurry photos, it is way past time for a new phone. They look like veggie clipped toenails. Delicious.

Ok now it’s time to share my real shame: my coconut milk had spoiled. I did not have any cream. I did not have any real milk. I frantically googled different cream replacements, NONE of which I had the ingredients for. So I made this absolute abomination. It is (forgive me): vanilla greek low-fat yogurt whipped into plain almond milk with a little bit of melted butter stirred in. It smelled like frosting gone bad.

OH WELL IN IT GOES. Things got vaguely...creamy. <eyebrow waggle>

Then it tells you to squeeze all the cream out of your beautiful leeks. Easier said than done. This process was messy and resulted in WAY less liquid than I had hoped - if I’d used real cream I would’ve just...added more. Instead I had leek-flavored vanilla greek yogurt almond juice. DO definitely save the leek bits for your rice!

Pour your pathetic amount of leek yogurt juice back into the pan and desecrate it with flippin’ yellow mustard and boullion. Push down the despair. Make sure to do this while hangry at like 9pm.

“Blanche” your kale, aka give it a day at the sauna. Boiling water for just two minutes then squeeze the ever loving heck out of it. Everything you’re cooking for this recipe ends up with tiny portions WHY.

YUM! Go mix your leek leftovers into your rice. Next time maybe just make leek leftovers and rice and skip everything else? At least this time you started the rice first, good job!

Mix the mustard yogurt juice with your wet leaves. How did all those ingredients shrink so damn much? You are so hungry.

Cook your fish. Remember at the very end you were supposed to, y’know, SEASON it. Absolute amatur hour over here.

Your warm wet leaf goo! It actually smells very good. This is my smallest saucepan, if that gives you any sense of what a tiny portion this made. Thank goodness for leeky rice.

Aaaaaaaaand plated! I told you it didn’t look anything like the Pintrest photo. It was promptly inhaled and while I know hunger is the best seasoning, Allan also agreed it was tasty despite him not liking any of the individual ingredients!

Final final verdict: I don’t have a ton of fish/seafood recipes in my repertoire, so I’m keeping this one around for now but would tackle it again with more kale and double the sauce ingredients, as well as, y’know CREAM and FRESH FISH. But for what a Frankenstein’s monster I made of it, it was pretty good!

#pintrest #recipefail #unpinned kale nytimescooking

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themiscyra1983 · 4 years

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Cassandra’s Half-Assed Cuisine in Quarantine: Low and Slow Beef Stew Over Noodles

Good evening, cats and kittens, and welcome to the last of my recipes, at least for the time being. This one will perhaps be judged less harshly by the esteemed @docholligay, your friend and mine, as it does involve some actual proper cooking. I’m not saying no judgment. I am saying less.

As with my Hot and Horrific Chili Queso, I don’t have a specific provenance for this dish. It’s based on something my parents would make for me and my sister since our childhood, well before I can remember. The Lease family has roots all over the place, if by ‘the place’ you mean Europe. Most immediately, we are Swedish (via my grandmother, an immigrant), Scottish (via my great-grandmother, through whom I am linked to Clan MacGillivray, if only unofficially, as that was her maiden name), and Irish (via my grandfather; the less said about him the better, but I like Ireland even as I loathe that no-account bastard through the mists of time). Any part of our heritage could have inspired this simple, hearty meal, though more likely my parents found it on the back of a gravy packet or something and added it to our repertoire. Truth be told, a lot of our family recipes were things my parents initially found on a package, which then mutated over the years when they lost the original recipe; such is the case with our Chili Ole, an amalgam of ground beef, tomato paste, macaroni, beans and various spices. No idea what that dish was originally. No idea how to actually make it.

And, though I do know how to make this, I similarly have no idea where this actually came from.

But this was a special meal for us. Simple but time consuming, it was a bit infrequent in our family meal rotation, making it special for us. Today I make it strictly on special occasions, when I have a whole day to myself, as it involves the slow cooker and while I know the point is to just let the thing run, I don’t like leaving it completely unattended. So this is a Christmas and birthday kind of meal for me. And it was my dad’s specialty; since he now lives a thousand miles away, it’s not like he can make it for me.

Now, my dad doesn’t cook very much, and even less these days, it seems. His girlfriend was shocked to learn I thought highly of his gravy, but I do have fond memories of him making gravy for our Thanksgiving dinners and for this dish. He gave me the best instructions he could recall, but the truth is, I’ve never been able to make the stuff thicken the way I like - the way he could. So, because I can’t actually advise you on making gravy, and in the spirit of this being half-assed, I’m going to tell you to add premade gravy. But in the course of this recipe you’re going to end up with a by-product that could certainly be the basis of a gravy or a broth, so I’ll tell you how my dad said to make the gravy at the end, even though it doesn’t work for me.

But let’s start with the half-assed version. As I said: this is a time-consuming recipe, but also a simple one. It involves a few ingredients, a bunch of waiting, and then tasting and adjusting to taste as you finish it off. The most expensive part will be the steak. You can use stew beef if you prefer, but I actually found my experience using small, tender steaks much more satisfying. It was necessity inspiring invention when I couldn’t get stew beef but now I actually prefer it. You can also use onion powder instead of diced onion (in fact this is what my dad does), but I find the latter makes things more flavorful. If you want to use onion powder, I’d say add a couple tablespoons.

Here’s what you’ll need.

The Stew:

About 24 ounces worth of tender angus steaks

One small or about half a medium onion, freshly diced

Two tablespoons of garlic powder

Salt

Pepper

About 24 ounces of premade gravy (Heinz Savory Beef Gravy works for me)

The Noodles:

One 12-ounce package of egg noodles

One stick of butter or margarine (or four ounces for those of you who don’t get the stuff in quarter-pound sticks)

Cut the steaks into bite-sized chunks and place into your slow cooker or Instant Pot. Add the diced onion and garlic powder, and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Cover this mixture with water - about 4 cups, enough to cover everything. Stir until you feel the ingredients have been distributed evenly. Put your slow cooker on low and leave to cook for eight hours.

After eight hours of cooking, remove the mixture from the slow cooker and drain, saving the water for other uses if desired. Put the drained mixture in a large saucepan and heat over low heat on your stovetop, adding the gravy and stirring often. Taste occasionally and add more garlic powder, onion powder, pepper and/or salt to taste.

In another pot, prepare the egg noodles as directed on the package, bringing enough water to cook them to a boil, adding the noodles, and stirring occasionally until tender. Once they’re ready, drain the noodles. Cut up the margarine or butter and add it to the pan, then return the noodles and stir thoroughly. Add a little olive oil as well if desired.

When the noodles are done and the beef stew is sufficiently hot, you’re ready to serve. I like to put the noodles in a bowl first, add some grated mozzarella on top, and then ladle the beef stew on top of that, adding salt and pepper if needed and to taste. You can also mix it all thoroughly and in fact this is sometimes what I do with leftovers (leaving out the cheese, which I add after reheating). The stew also goes well over potatoes as prepared in a variety of ways - mashed, boiled, those little red potatoes perfectly cooked, you name it.

This can easily make six servings or so, or four very hearty servings. I beg you to have a salad as well - I make a point of eating my greens. This is a lot of starch and protein and you should get some more veggies in there.

So What About the Gravy?

Again, I’ve never been able to make this work. Perhaps it’s the corn starch that’s giving me problems - my dad was diagnosed with celiac several years ago and stopped using flour. We could have noodles made from wheat (made in a separate pot, and tasted by the non-celiac folks in the house), but he had to taste the gravy to make it properly, so: gluten-free gravy. If you already know how to make gravy, you should use your process.

But this is what my dad told me.

You will need:

About two cups of water

About 3-4 heaping spoonfuls (my dad was not specific, I went with tablespoons) of corn starch (my family always used Argo brand)

Some Gravy Master, mainly for coloring - maybe about a teaspoon at most

When the stew mixture is done in the slow cooker, do NOT drain it off - add everything to the saucepan. In a separate vessel, mix the water, starch, and Gravy Master into a slurry, then add this to the pan as well. Stir everything together, heating over low heat, tasting occasionally. Add additional water if you find the gravy is getting too thick (spectacularly not a problem for me). As in the above process, add additional spices while cooking to taste.

Last Notes

To be honest, the “or margarine” up there is about my personal taste - it’s what I grew up with, as my family was often poor. We had butter, but used it sparingly, sticking with margarine for a lot of our cooking, including pasta. Butter tastes too...’buttery’ to me on pasta now. I use margarine (and I’m specific about the brands I like; I used to use Promise but after I started having trouble finding it I switched to Land O’ Lakes); you may very well prefer butter. I wouldn’t call either option exactly healthy.

In my dad’s version of the recipe - which uses stew beef and onion powder and involves his own gravy, as described above - he also browns the beef before adding it to the slow cooker, no more than about five or ten minutes in a frying pan over fairly low heat. I’ve never found this step necessary in my version of the recipe but you may like the effect.

...now I’m thinking about that Chili Ole my family used to make, whatever the hell that actually was before we got our grubby little hands on it. I’ll have to see if my dad remembers how we made that. But that’s all the ‘recipes’ I have for now; a LOT of what I eat otherwise boils down to ‘follow the directions on the package’ or ‘make a goddamned sandwich’ or ‘okay it’s a burger, cook a burger and slap it on a bun and top it with stuff’. If I think of anything else, well, my keyboard’s always ready to go.

For now, stay safe, stay healthy, and try to eat better than I do.

#cooking #cassandra's half-assed cuisine in quarantine #food #not actually sure this qualifies as a proper stew #but you know aside from using premade gravy i think this isn't the worst #anyway it's veggies beef and gravy #what else would make it a stew

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amarauder · 5 years

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0.8 madame pamplemousse and her incredible edibles

sincerely, the blue and silver gryffindor

princess of magic installment

draco malfoy x reader

Madame Pamplemousse and her cat had completely vanished. Y/N had only looked up for a second; how could they have disappeared so quickly? She opened her mouth to call out but then quickly thought better of it.

It might be some kind of trick they were playing. Perhaps they already suspected she was a spy. She shivered at the thought.

But not just that; there was something distinctly creepy about the place. It was partly the shadows made by the candle flames, which were long and spindly and danced across the walls, and the foods themselves, which seemed almost to be alive, as if the cheeses were softly sighing and the bunches of sausages whispering in their dry, garlicky voices.

As Y/N's eyes grew accustomed to the gloom, she stared closer at the shelves. Each one was packed densely with shining colored-glass containers and behind each row there would be another and another, as far as the eye could see, and the shelves themselves were all stacked higgedly-piggedly up to the ceiling. One was filled with different types of mustard in many shades of yellow.

Above this was a dark, cavernous shelf reaching into the shadows, and it was only after she had counted back Olives, Black Truffles, Caviar, Pickled Walnuts from the Fourteenth Century, Woodland Snails Stuffed with Sausage Meat, Python Heads with Licorice and Giant Squid Eyes in Balsamic Vinegar that she realized everything on it was completely black.

Stepping black a couple paces, she looked up at another shelf and saw how all the bottles and jars were in varying shades of green.

Y/N found an old, rickety ladder and, climbing up, she surveyed the winding tower of shelves about her and saw how they formed a carousel of moving colors, each one seeping into the other, blending subtly so that no one ever clashed or made itself too bold but shifted gracefully: from the golden hues of Barracuda Fillets in Garlic Butter in the dark, orchard greens of Grasshoppers in Tarragon Oil; from the rich purple of Lavender-Crusted Frogs' Legs to the dark crimson of Velociraptor Heart in Red Wine. And there right at the top, on the highest shelf, was a tiny jar into which all the spinning hues were coiling and flickering, like flames reflecting in the glass.

She knew instinctively what it must be: it was the special delicacy for which her uncle wanted the recipe. Perhaps this jar would hold the secret. It might even have the ingredients on its label. She felt a sudden, overwhelming desire to snatch it and run away. Then she could give it to her Uncle and it would all be over; she would be free.

Without stopping to think, she reached up.

And immediately regretted it. The ladder was not quite high enough and began to wobble. Desperately she tried to steady herself, just managing to get a when above her she heard a hissing sound, and there was Camembert on the highest shelf. Y/N screamed and let go her hand. The ladder tottered in mid-air for a second before plummeting straight to the ground.

And there, perfectly positioned at the precise point at which Y/N would have landed, was Madame Pamplemousse, who caught her just in time. In fact, she caught the silver fairy wings, which meant they broke off from the back of Y/N's dress, leaving her to fall only a small distance to the floor.

"So, Mademoiselle, you have found your way around?"

"Yes, Madame," said Y/N, somewhat shaken.

"You have a keen eye, I see. Very good. I am also delighted that you have lost those ridiculous wings. All in all, a most promising start."

"Thank you, Madame," said Y/N,

"Never mind Camembert. He makes no effort to put people at their ease. That's how he is; there's nothing I can do about it. Besides, he may have thought you were spying."

Y/N was startled when she head this and began to go bright red. Quickly she averted her eyes. But when she looked up again, Madame Pamplemousse appeared not to have noticed. Instead, she was busy by the cheese counter, unwrapping a giant goat's cheese from an enormous green leaf. "Well, Mademoiselle," she said. "Are you ready?"

And from that moment Y/N began officially to be Madame Pamplemousse's assistant. Starting with the goat's cheese, she was taught about all 653 different varieties of cheese that were available in the shop. This included a moldy blue cheese that dated back to the French Revolution and a soft, gooey ooze with a brownish green rind that was once a favorite of Joan of Arc. This was so unspeakably stinky that it had to be protected by a heavy marble lid several centimeters thick, but even so Y/N was sure she sometimes saw it rattling and, on one occasion, heard it softly belch.

At the back of the shop there was a low doorway which led into an anteroom: a small kitchen area with a stone floor and a large, dark wooden table. It was here that she would be put to work each day, learning how to fillet an anchovy and to dress it in oils and spices, how to smoke an eel, how to make pâté from a sea serpent and how to squeeze the nectar from a violet.

Madame Pamplemousse would give precise but rather minimal instructions in the kitchen, and Y/N discovered that someone who did a lot of the actual cooking was Camembert. He was, for example, particularly skilful with a whisk. Via a set of steps, he would reach the table on his hind legs, and then, with one paw, whizz things together with astonishing speed. Equally, when it came to chopping he was incredibly fast. Y/N could chop quite fast herself but she was wary of some knives, which looked like they might slice off your finger before you had even noticed. Though if ever she slowed down, Camembert would scowl disdainfully and 'tsk' until she sped up.

But despite being afraid of them, Y/N found she rather liked Madame Pamplemousse and her cat. However frightening they might seem, at least they never bullied her or shouted at her. And each day when she arrived, the shop would be empty, but on the counter a small brass pot of hot chocolate would be waiting, at just the right temperature. And with the door open to the sunlit street outside, she would sit sipping this in the cool of the morning.

For as long as she had been at the Squealing Pig, Y/N used to wake up everyday wishing she could go back to sleep. But now she could hardly wait to get out of bed. The tasks she was given at the shop were getting much more complex, thought strangely she found she had to think less about what she was doing. Her instincts seemed to be quickening and becoming more refined.

Madame Pamplemousse had evidently noticed this because she began to treat her differently: less like a child and more like an equal-with respect. A respect, thought Y/N guiltily, she would soon repay by betraying her.

By day she tried to forget about it, but come sundown her heart would sink at the prospect of her Uncle's interrogation. For she had been there two weeks now and still there was no sight of the precious recipe.

At the back of the shop, in the far corner of the little kitchen, there was a wrought-iron spiral staircase winding down to the floor below. Once, Y/N had tiptoed down a couple of flights and seen at the bottom a corridor which led to a door. And she knew it was behind that door that Madame Pamplemousse cooked her most incredible edible.

master masterlist

sincerely, the blue and silver gryffindor

#sincerely the blue and silver gryffindor #draco malfoy x reader #the princess of magic #a princess of magic book

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freshstartfromtheheart-blog1 · 6 years

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Shepherd's Pie

“Happy St. Patrick’s Day!” is what I was saying a little over a week ago as I purchased all of the fresh ingredients to make my very first shepherd’s pie, from scratch. I was so proud to come up with this idea for my second recipe and adventure in the kitchen. What a fun idea for St. Patrick’s day, and it was something I definitely have never tried to cook on my own before. This year instead of staying out late, decked in green from head to toe with giant light up shamrocks on my head, I chose to spend a quiet night in listening to music preparing a lovely meal.

I have to admit I got a little caught up and a little busy this past week and haven't been able to post until now, but hey BETTER LATE THAN NEVER :)

I have only tried Shepherd’s Pie before a couple times in my life and each time it was only because someone I was with ordered it at a restaurant as their meal and I had a few bites. Or when I worked at a Preschool a few years back they served it there for lunch, pretty fancy lunch huh? Although it was just instant mashed potatoes, teeny tiny frozen peas and carrots, and some mini meat balls mixed all together in a bowl with some shredded cheese on top. Either way, whipped up in a restaurant or served buffet style in the preschool I always thought it was delicious, and I couldn't wait to try to make my own from scratch!

Many recipes I found for Shepherd’s Pie called for ground beef, but I decided to go with chuck roast to make it more of a hearty stew to enjoy on this cold, windy, night in.

I followed the recipe step by step, I started by browning the meat in batches just as it said but my favorite part was chopping up the delicious fresh veggies. Adding more veggies into my diet is definitely a must, and I was proud of myself for not going the easy route and buying them already chopped and frozen. :)

The celery was the easy part, I felt like I was on a roll! Then it was time to chop the carrots, and this ordeal set me back about 45 min. ;)

I’m not a big fan of cooked carrots mostly because of the texture, so my bright idea was to grate them instead. I love the taste and I didn’t want to leave anything out of the recipe (except the onions of course) ;) I still haven't been able to develop a liking for onions....just yet. Plus I did a little research and one of my favorite chefs Gordon Ramsay grates his carrots in his recipe. NICE!

Trying to budget my money a bit better I bought the most.....lets say inexpensive grater from the grocery store, that was my first mistake! It took me close to 10 minutes to grate ONE SINGLE CARROT. With an EXTREMELY sore arm and 5 more carrots to go I came up with another bright idea. Why don’t I put them in the blender! Quick, easy, and I should have nicely shredded carrots in just a couple pushes of a button. No...No...and NO! this did not work. All that happened was big chunks of carrots banging around the blades making a horrible noise. At the risk of breaking my roomates blender it was back to the grater because I was not giving up on those grated carrots. Over 30 minutes later I fully grated 6 LARGE carrots! I even alternated hands and got a killer arm workout in the process. Do you want to see what 40 minutes of hard work grating carrots looks like?

NOTHING SPECIAL! And this is what took the most effort of this whole recipe. The important thing is I was DETERMINED and I did not give up! ;)

Next up was the chopping of the garlic, which I was looking forward to after the carrot fiasco. I set aside 6 cloves of Garlic and after trying to peel one of the cloves, that TOO was taking FOREVER. So at this point I turned to google for a quick trick to peel the skin off garlic. I found one. I was a little skeptical at first, it said to place the cloves of garlic into a hard container with a lid and SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE for a couple minutes. At this point I was glad I had the house to myself that night because i’m sure this looked absolutely ridiculous. After shaking that container as if there was no tomorrow, I was surprised to find this actually worked! WOW! All of the skin came right off.

Google was again my best friend because I needed a substitute for the cup of red wine. I used beef stock, but other choices included: vinegar, ginger ale, grape juice, apple juice, cranberry juice, pomegranate juice, lemon juice, liquid from canned mushrooms, tomato juice, or even just water.

I followed the recipe and combined all of the ingredients and allowed them to simmer, and let me just tell you my house smelled ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! As all of the flavors combined together I couldn't help but taste test this, over and over again. SO incredibly flavorful I could have just stopped there and eaten it just like that! But I moved on to the mashed potatoes. And for the record I have not made mashed potatoes from scratch many times in my life, if at all and they are so SIMPLE and WAY better than instant potatoes. I could have eaten a giant bowl of those alone too!

Now it was time to transfer the ingredients to a casserole dish and bake!

I really wanted to pipe the potatoes on with a pastry bag to make it look pretty, but the one problem I had with this recipe is there was not enough mashed potatoes AT ALL. Or else I just went a little overboard with the taste testing ;) There is supposed to be a thick layer covering the top of the stew and I barley could spread them into a thin layer to cover it. OH WELL, into the oven it went. I knew it would still be delicious!

I’m KICKING myself now, but I did not take an after photo :(

While trying to plate this for a perfect after photo it came out UGLY UGLY UGLY! I did not want anyone to see it. But let me tell you it was one of the most DELICIOUS things I have EVER tasted. It was full of flavor and came out tasting perfect!

I’m bummed I was so worried about what people might think of my after photo. This was a dish I was truly proud of, and worked hard on (lets not forget the carrots) Even though it didn’t look perfect on the outside doesn’t mean it wasn’t absolutely amazing!

SUCH IS LIFE, things may not always be perfect but life sure can be amazing when you take the time to enjoy the things you love to do. It’s as simple as PIE ;)

Ingredients

2 pound beef chuck roast

6 tablespoons all-purpose flour, divided

4 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

1 large onion, chopped

4 ribs celery, sliced

6 carrots, sliced

6 cloves garlic, minced

1 cup high-quality red wine

1 1/2 cups beef stock

2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce

1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar

2 bay leaves

3 sprigs fresh thyme

1 1/2 cups frozen green peas

Salt and pepper

2 pounds gold Yukon potatoes, peeled and cut into 3/4 inch cubes

4 tablespoons butter

1/4 cup half and half

Chopped chives (for garnish)

Instructions

1. Cut chuck roast into 3/4 inch cubes and place in a medium bowl. Sprinkle with 3 tablespoons of the flour and toss to coat each piece.

2. Heat olive oil in a large non-stick or iron skillet. Brown meat in batches. Do not overcrowd skillet and add oil as needed. Remove from skillet and set aside.

3. Add onion, celery, carrots and garlic to skillet and saute for six or seven minutes. Add three tablespoons of flour, mix well, and cook for two to three more minutes. Deglaze skillet with wine and cook for 2 to 3 minutes. Add beef stock, Worcestershire sauce, vinegar, bay leaves, thyme, 1 1/2 teaspoons salt and 1/2 teaspoon pepper. Return beef to skillet and stir to combine.

4. Bring to boil, reduce heat, cover skillet, and simmer for 30 to 40 minutes, or until vegetables and meat are tender. Add frozen peas and mix to combine. Adjust salt and pepper to taste and remove from heat.

5. While stew is cooking, place potatoes in a medium large pot and cover with cold water. Add two tablespoons salt to water and bring to a boil. Reduce heat, cover pot, and cook for 15 to 20 minutes or until a knife pierces potato.

6. Drain potatoes in a colander. Mash potatoes with a potato masher or push them through a ricer. Add butter, 2 teaspoons salt, and 1/4 teaspoon pepper. Stir until butter is melted. Add half and half and stir to combine.

7. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

8. Transfer beef filling to a casserole dish or finish the pie in the skillet as long as it is oven safe. Spread potatoes evenly over beef mixture with a icing spatula or large knife. Or, pipe the potatoes with a pastry bag.

9. Bake the pie for 30 to 40 minutes until bubbling and potato topping is slightly browning. Garnish with chives and serve immediately.

#shepherds pie #cooking #recipes #new recipes #st patricks day #kitchen #beef stew #mashedpotatoes #yummy #delicious #chef #foodblog #amazing #carrots #garlic #yum #freshstartfromtheheart

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kembungsusu · 3 years

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Bean salad. Three bean salad is usually made with canned green beans instead of the cannellini white beans I'm using here. But I've yet to meet a canned green bean I like, so cannellini it is. Bean salad is a common cold salad composed of various cooked beans - green beans, yellow wax beans, chickpeas, kidney beans - and typically fresh raw onions, peppers, and/or other vegetables, tossed in a vinaigrette or vinegar and characteristically sweetened with sugar.

You can substitute the variety of beans in this recipe with other types and still have a great bean salad. Bean salad is a great way to get the health benefits from beans. Beans are a good source of protein, they're full of fiber and are said to "pull".

Hey everyone, I hope you are having an incredible day today. Today, we're going to make a special dish, bean salad. One of my favorites. This time, I will make it a bit unique. This is gonna smell and look delicious.

Three bean salad is usually made with canned green beans instead of the cannellini white beans I'm using here. But I've yet to meet a canned green bean I like, so cannellini it is. Bean salad is a common cold salad composed of various cooked beans - green beans, yellow wax beans, chickpeas, kidney beans - and typically fresh raw onions, peppers, and/or other vegetables, tossed in a vinaigrette or vinegar and characteristically sweetened with sugar.

Bean salad is one of the most well liked of recent trending meals in the world. It is easy, it is fast, it tastes yummy. It is enjoyed by millions every day. They are nice and they look wonderful. Bean salad is something which I have loved my entire life.

To begin with this recipe, we have to prepare a few ingredients. You can cook bean salad using 9 ingredients and 2 steps. Here is how you can achieve that.

The ingredients needed to make Bean salad:

{Prepare 1 can of green beans.

{Take 1 can of kidney beans.

{Take 1 can of wax beans.

{Make ready 1 can of yellow hominy or chickpeas.

{Get 1/2 of small onion, diced (I prefer sweet onion when I have it).

{Get 1 cup of white wine vinegar.

{Prepare 1/3 cup of granulated sugar.

{Get 1/4 cup of olive oil.

{Take 1/2 tsp of salt.

Find healthy, delicious bean salad recipes including black bean, green bean and three bean salad. Healthier recipes, from the food and nutrition experts at EatingWell. Use storecupboard pulses like butter beans, chickpeas, black beans and cannellini beans to create vibrant, simple salads. Find ideas for dressings, flavour combinations and more.

Instructions to make Bean salad:

Drain each can of beans and hominy and rinse with cool water. Add beans, hominy, and onion to a large bowl..

Mix vinegar, oil, sugar, and salt. Pour oven bean mixture and refrigerate. Will keep in the refrigerator for 7 days or more..

Discover these tasty and easy to prepare Bean salad recipes from the experts at Food Network. Bean salad is the perfect party food. Choose among our most popular renditions for your next picnic. Bean salad recipes - Discover a complete collection of Bean salad recipes explained step-by-step, with photos and handy cooking tips! Considering that bean salads — a can of beans, a Good Season-ish dressing, whatever chopped vegetables struck my fancy — were a fairly significant staple of my diet in my post-college years, I was.

So that is going to wrap it up for this exceptional food bean salad recipe. Thanks so much for your time. I'm sure that you can make this at home. There is gonna be more interesting food at home recipes coming up. Remember to save this page on your browser, and share it to your loved ones, friends and colleague. Thank you for reading. Go on get cooking!

#recipesfood

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easyfoodnetwork · 4 years

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13 Restaurant Recipes You Can Actually Make

Woman photo, fstop123/Getty; chef’s hat photo, skodonnell/Getty

Restaurant cookbooks are usually not for the “average” home cook. But these dishes are actually, totally doable.

The genre of the restaurant cookbook is both large and varied, but the common denominator that underlies the majority of its titles is the implicit promise that you, too, can reproduce a chef’s work in the confines of your home kitchen. Most of the time, this promise is patently false. But there are a number of notable exceptions, signature dishes that really can be made by home cooks with a command of basic kitchen techniques, as well as access to both adequate time and fairly common pantry staples. Given that these are two things many folks have in abundance right now, there has arguably never been a better moment to start making facsimiles of famous — and yet frequently accessible! — restaurant dishes at home. Here are 13 to get you started.

1. Roast chicken and bread salad, from The Zuni Cafe Cookbook

This dish helped to cement the Zuni Cafe’s place in the annals of California restaurant legend - and also happens to be ideal for any home cook armed with both pantry staples and time. The latter is particularly important here, as the recipe requires salting the chicken for 24 hours in order to promote flavor and tenderness. The most complicated thing you need to do here is insert sprigs of thyme under the chicken’s skin — but if you don’t have any, no big deal. It is more or less impossible to go wrong with a roast chicken and a salad made from bread mingled with the drippings of said chicken. Just budget plenty of time, which it’s likely you have a lot of these days.

2. Bo ssam, from Momofuku: A Cookbook

As with Zuni’s chicken, the main requirement for reproducing Momofuku’s bo ssam is time: To make the slow-roasted pork shoulder, you need to cure it in a sugar-salt rub for at least six hours before depositing it in an oven to roast for another six. Online specialty grocers have made it easier than ever to find ingredients like ssämjang and kochujang, but even if you can’t find, say, the oysters suggested as an accompaniment, you can still turn this into a banner family meal with some rice, lettuce, and any number of condiments.

3. Sunday sauce, from The Frankies Spuntino Kitchen Companion & Cooking Manual

Canned tomatoes, olive oil, salt, a pinch of red chile flakes, and 13 cloves of garlic are all you need to make the red sauce that has anointed untold plates of pasta and meatballs at Frankies 457 Spuntino in Brooklyn. Once again, time is of the essence here: To bring the sauce to its rich, thick Platonic ideal, you need to simmer it for four hours on the stovetop, which leaves you plenty of time to binge almost five episodes of Grey’s Anatomy or decoupage your living room floor or whatever else you’re doing these days to prevent the creeping onset of quarantine-induced psychosis.

4. Obama’s short ribs, from The Red Rooster Cookbook: The Story of Food and Hustle in Harlem

So long as you have access to a few basic staples, including onions, carrots, celery, soy sauce, ginger, and garlic — and two hours to spare — you, too, can eat the short ribs that Marcus Samuelsson served to the 44th President of the United States. The key here is a long, slow braise; even if you’re lacking one of the recipe’s ingredients, you’ll still end up with fall-off-the-bone-tender meat, as well as a rich sauce that yields enough for leftovers that work well with any number of dishes. Serve the ribs on rice, or noodles, or really, anything that’s good for soaking up sauce.

5. Baked goat cheese with spring lettuce salad, from the Chez Panisse Cafe Cookbook

The secret ingredient here? Surprise! It’s time. Alice Waters wants you to use 12 whole hours to marinate the goat cheese in herbs and oil, and why argue? But once this is done, there’s not a lot else to do, aside from rolling the cheese in panko and baking it, washing some salad mix, whisking together a very simple vinaigrette, and slicing up a baguette, if you’re lucky enough to have one. Make sure to save the oil left over from marinating the cheese — it is supremely flavorful and its uses are manifold.

6. Khao phat muu (Thai-style fried rice with pork), from Pok Pok: Food and Stories from the Streets, Homes, and Roadside Restaurants of Northern Thailand

Andy Ricker’s fried rice is something of a godsend to the quarantined (and impatient) home cook: it is a deeply flavorful assemblage day-old rice, shallots, garlic, and other common pantry staples (sugar, soy sauce, vegetable oil), and also happens to take five minutes to cook. What’s more, it is versatile: If you don’t have the pork that the recipe calls for, you can substitute any protein you have on hand, such as chicken or tofu. And if you don’t have cilantro or green onions (scallions), that’s fine, too — though now is a perfect time to start growing scallions on your windowsill.

7. Miso-marinated black cod, from Nobu: The Cookbook

This is one of those rollercoaster recipes, in the sense that the amount of time you’ll spend anticipating it exists in inverse proportion to the amount of time you’ll spend experiencing it. Because, like a number of other recipes here, this one calls for advanced prep: Two to three days before you eat this glorious fish, you slather it with a sake-mirin-miso-sugar marinade, cover it up, and stick it in the fridge. Cooking the fish takes less than 20 minutes and requires no additional ingredients save for a bit of oil. If you can’t find black cod, try another firm, white-fleshed fish like striped bass or mahi mahi.

8. Gumbo z’herbes, from The Dooky Chase Cookbook

The onset of summer is a perfect time to make Leah Chase’s iconic gumbo, a veritable vegetable cornucopia that calls for mustard, collard, and turnip greens, along with cabbage, romaine lettuce, watercress, spinach, and the tops of both beets and carrots. There’s also an abundance of meat (sausage, ham, brisket, and chorizo), but despite its long list of ingredients, this gumbo is a straightforward endeavor. All it requires is chopping vegetables, bringing a pot to boil, sizzling some chorizo in oil, and making a roux (and if you don’t know how, the recipe has instructions). And perhaps best of all, it will feed you for a week.

9. Hummus tehina, from Zahav: A World of Israeli Cooking

There are few better uses of dried chickpeas than Zahav’s hummus tehina (or tahini). This is hummus that is as much for hedonists as pragmatists: its bodacious creaminess is matched only by the number of foods you can pair it with. Its ease of assembly is also remarkable; after soaking the chickpeas overnight (see: Time, Part 125c), you cook them until they’re falling apart, then throw them into a food processor with some tahini, garlic, salt, and lemon juice. If you manage to transfer the hummus to a storage container before eating it all, pause for a second to applaud your willpower.

10. Canned sardines with Triscuits, from Prune

This is more of a shopping list than a recipe — one that, moreover, is basically engineered for quarantine living. If you have a tin of sardines, a box of Triscuits, a spoonful of Dijon mustard, and a few sprigs of parsley, the dish that helped put Prune on the map of the popular imagination can be yours in the amount of time it takes to open that tin of sardines.

11. Cornbread, from Heritage

Sean Brock’s cornbread is a necessary accompaniment to pretty much every meal served at Husk. It’s also easy enough to make at home that it can accompany all of your meals, too. The list of ingredients is short and savory — Brock eschews sugar in his cornbread, along with flour, so what you’re left with is an all-cornmeal concoction, greased and flavored with melted bacon fat and made tender with buttermilk. Don’t have (or eat) bacon? Use melted butter. No buttermilk? Add a bit of vinegar to regular milk (there are many guides out there to assist you with this). So long as you have a smoking hot cast iron skillet (or baking pan), you’re good to go.

12. Ricotta toast, from Everything I Want to Eat: Sqirl and the New California Cooking

There are two approaches to recreating Sqirl’s legendary and deceptively simple ricotta toast at home. You can make the jam, the ricotta, and even the brioche yourself, or you can go to a store and buy the jam, the ricotta, and the brioche (or really, almost any kind of bread, so long as you slice it thick and remember to butter and toast it before piling everything on top of it). There is no right or wrong here, just the promise of cheese and jam ferried to your mouth on a warm carbohydrate.

13. Coconut cake, from Highlands Bar & Grill

This iconic cake helped longtime Highlands Bar & Grill pastry chef Dolester Miles to win a 2018 James Beard Award. While its recipe is not available in a cookbook, you can fortunately find it online. Like many layer cakes, it initially appears daunting. But look closer and you’ll see that making it is primarily a question of taking enough time to make the cake’s components — as well as having access to four kinds of coconut (shredded, extract, cream, and milk). The finished product has numerous virtues, but between its sheer quantity and the general ability of cake to stay fresh (or fresh enough) for days on end, perhaps its most relevant attribute is that it’s essentially a pantry staple in and of itself. Why worry about making breakfast, lunch, or dinner when you could just eat cake instead?

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Restaurant cookbooks are usually not for the “average” home cook. But these dishes are actually, totally doable.

1. Roast chicken and bread salad, from The Zuni Cafe Cookbook

2. Bo ssam, from Momofuku: A Cookbook

3. Sunday sauce, from The Frankies Spuntino Kitchen Companion & Cooking Manual

4. Obama’s short ribs, from The Red Rooster Cookbook: The Story of Food and Hustle in Harlem

5. Baked goat cheese with spring lettuce salad, from the Chez Panisse Cafe Cookbook

6. Khao phat muu (Thai-style fried rice with pork), from Pok Pok: Food and Stories from the Streets, Homes, and Roadside Restaurants of Northern Thailand

7. Miso-marinated black cod, from Nobu: The Cookbook

8. Gumbo z’herbes, from The Dooky Chase Cookbook

9. Hummus tehina, from Zahav: A World of Israeli Cooking

10. Canned sardines with Triscuits, from Prune

11. Cornbread, from Heritage

12. Ricotta toast, from Everything I Want to Eat: Sqirl and the New California Cooking

13. Coconut cake, from Highlands Bar & Grill

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