#so i thought for once id make some final character designs

[boonsandwhatever]

kill the monarch

#i made some very early versions of these when the game first came out #so i thought for once id make some final character designs #slay the princess #slay the princess fanart #the voice of the hero #the voice of the paranoid #the voice of the broken #the voice of the smitten #the voice of the stubborn #the voice of the cold #the voice of the cheated #the voice of the contrarian #the voice of the skeptic #the voice of the oppertunist #the voice of the hunted #christ that's alot of tags #my art

[fitzs-space]

I absolutely love ur mer designs for Etho, Grian and our lovely sea monster ofc lol. Do you have any more in depth refs for their designs, id love to see more of how they look if possible! /nf ofc

only really had the couple rough sketches for their designs unfortunately! given its how I work with most of my stuff with just quick sketches like this. But I'll give the couple details I remember adding into their designs! Main notes will be I spent more time on Etho because I knew they'd be seen the most,, also that this this Is a default of how I've always drawn mermaids, with the whole dark eyes and covered in scales and fins, more siren esk in a sense.

with Etho the main things I remember adding is chancing the headband and gloves to be more like kelp being wrapped around/ braided, because In general I like drawing mermaid outfits with a more found object type vibe to them. the other main thing was intentionally giving them 9 fins in their design, 6 on the tail, 2 on their fourarms, and the one on the back. Cause I enjoy drawing Etho with the kitsune vibe. even though I;ve only ever drawn them with the full ears n tail like,, once or twice? who knows.

Also! points points, finally had an excuse to draw their tattoos!

only notes I really had for Grian was wanting him to have the rounded Fins cause feather vibes. and I never really looked up actual fish or animals when I draw quick designs, so I go off pure vibes and vague memory of what I think the animal looks like,,, and we end up with stuff like this.

and drew them with the void damage again! thought it would look pretty to have a tail and scales that looked like a void/spacelike. and It wouldn't have been a good colour pallet to have him in just pure red with the poncho and tail bein the same colour. I did also try the white hair too, even just being streaks like my s5 Ex design, but It wasn't really working out.

I looked at my old design of Xb and went, "what can I do to make this being even prettier." and here we are /hj the full sea monster style Is something only like five of the hermits would have seen, so its not a common thing. I'd like to think Xb also like triples in size when like this, but its hart to show that when its just a single character shot like this. the default Xb design I will use is the "just some guy" kinda thing with only a couple fishy details if you look close enough. the whole a couple scales around the eyes like freckles and a vague impression of gills that are mostly covered up buy the hoodie anyways. the third eye is something Xb always keeps closed, and is normally hidden behind bangs

yada yada, I draw my Xb design as a character who just does everything to act as "Just some guy" and not as a full on monster of the deep sea kind thing only other design notes would be me adding the runes into Xb's horns, cause I've got some random magics lore Ideas, and I've been meaning to also add some to Tango's design as well and I originally had drawn Xb's earrings as a way to match with Hypnos, forgot that I drew this one with just a teardrop,, but I know my Hypno design does have both a eye and a bell on his earrings. Silly reference to a cool fic that was a good chunk of inspiration to how I characterize my Xb

Idk, not as many thoughts behind these designs as I had in the ties comic, but still a couple none the less!

#answering the thoughts #hermitcraft #headcanon dump #ish #grian #ethoslab #xbcrafted #fitzs art #I try to use no pronouns for my Xb. so the writing may read odd if you don't know that! #silly mermaid designs

[dauntlessdiva]

There's A Band At The Bar (That I'm Dying To See)

For @steddieholidaydrabbles warm up prompt: high school/college au

Rating: T

Word count: 963

Characters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Corroded Coffin (mentioned), Hellfire Club (mentioned)

Cw: Implied/Rferenced Underage Drinking

Tags: High School au, Self-Appointed Designated Driver Steve Harrington, Joyriding, Queer Steve Harrington, Queer Eddie Munson, Miscommunication, First Kiss, Getting Together, Temporary Amnesia.

~♡~

It took him upwards of an hour, but Steve finally tracked Munson down in the alley outside of The Hideout. Checking his watch, he cursed at how close he was cutting it.

"C'mon, Munson, do you have the goods or not? I don't have all night!"

"Hold your horses there big boy, I've got it right here. What's the rush anyways, you got a hot date or something?" Eddie knew poking the bear was a bad idea, especially when said bear was the king of the school, but if Eddie was known for one thing it was his love for bad ideas.

"Not that it's any of your business," Steve huffed, lighting the smoke he'd pulled from his back pocket while Eddie had been taunting him, "but I've got my eye on someone in the band."

Eddie smirked at that, shaking his head in faux disappointment. "For shame, Harrington! Leave some for the rest of us, will you?"

Steve smiled around his cigarette. "Nah," he eyed Eddie up and down, "I don't think I will."

Ducking his head to try and hide his flushed face, Eddie groused, "Do you want the fake or not man, I thought you were on a time crunch?"

"I am," Steve replied flippantly, "though it won't be the end of the world if plan A doesn't work out." He added, pulling a set of keys from his pocket. Keys that obviously belonged to the most expensive car in all of Hawkins, Richard Harrington's 1957 Cadillac Coupe Deville.

The wolf whistle Eddie let out caught Steve off guard, but thankfully not enough for him to lose his composure. He stomped out the butt of his smoke as he pocketed the keys once more.

"So, what d'ya say Munson. I've got the agreed cash on me for the fake, but if that's not enough we could take this baby," his hand shifted in his pocket and the metal flashed as it caught the dim light overhead, "out for a spin later?"

Eddie had to shake his head and clear his throat a few times before he could respond, but when he finally felt like his brain could function properly, he gave an enthusiastic yes and handed over Steve's shiny new fake ID.

He'd done his best to make it as accurate as possible, even taking the extra time to get information from Harrington's drivers licence to get the height and birthday as accurate as possible. It was some of his best work, if he does say so himself.

As Steve started jogging away, Eddie called out a 'good luck' in farewell before disappearing through the back entry of The Hideout to do any last minute tweaks to his look before his performance.

Friday night was a blur of booze and music- playing, flirting, and laughing the night away- but Eddie was certain it was the best he'd ever performed. However, he couldn't remember a lot of the details after said performance.

He knew there was a cute guy who couldn't take his eyes off Eddie the whole night, and he vaguely recalled a joyride in an insanely expensive and ridiculously fancy car, but that's about it.

So imagine his surprise when Monday rolled around and he found himself in the company of King Steve himself, willingly sitting with the freaks and geeks of Hawkins High as though it was the norm, despite the bewildered looks Tommy and Carol kept throwing his way from their Royal lunch table amongst the rest of the nobility.

Even queerer, Steve was not only being simply civil but downright nice! Kind, even! He laughed at Eddie's jokes, even the ones that Hellfire didn't find funny. He paid attention to the conversation and asked thoughtful and in depth questions about even the nerdiest of their interests.

Eddie spends the rest of the school day, and each one after that week, feeling like he'd stepped into the twilight zone.

By Friday, his curiosity finally won out. Eddie wanted answers, dammit! And he was gonna get them!

So when lunch rolled around that day, he asked to speak to Steve in private, and dragged him out to the picnic bench in the woods. Eddie attempted to interrogate him, and Steve just restated that he was interested in someone at their table.

When Eddie didn't seem to get it, Steve started to describe this mystery person of his. They were loud and passionate and brave and nerdy. They liked metal and Dnd. They had the cutest dimples and this laugh that rung through any room as clear as a bell no matter how crowded. They were in a band. They were in Eddie's band.

If Eddie didn't know better, he'd think Steve was describing him, but- oh holy shit.

Suddenly last Friday seemed to come into focus for the first time in Eddie's mind. Steve, crowding himself up against the front of the stage, watching Corroded Coffin with rapt attention. Steve, congratulating the band on a stellar performance. Steve, chatting and laughing and flirting with Eddie. Steve, taking Eddie out for a joyride in his Daddy's car. Steve, driving Eddie home. Steve leaning over to kiss him on the cheek before letting him climb out. Steve, waiting until he knew Eddie had made it into the trailer safe and sound before leaving.

"Oh holy shit."

"Yeah," Steve said, nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Eddie breathed in awe.

Steve, despite having prepared several speeches with lengthy explanations, simply shrugs and goes with, "You didn't bring it up, and I didn't wanna push."

Eddie couldn't help that he melted just a little bit at that. But who wouldn't? So he did what any logical person would.

He pulled Steve forward and kissed him silly.

#steddieholidaydrabbles #warm up prompt #surprise bitches! #steddie holiday drabbles #stranger things fanfiction #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #high school au #my writing #i did a thing #shut up mars

[hypnogogyc]

Since you are THE Oliver banks artist (to me atleast) thoughts on the fact Oliver and Jane Prentis worked at the same crystal/tarrot shop? I don’t think they knew eachother all that wel or anything but god there’s something so intresting about having these avatars all be so closely connected

(Love your Oliver design btw:) )

Oh that is the highest honor i hold to my chest id like to thank lilnan for the trustfall comic that broke my brain and started me on this path.

AND THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK!!!

First of all as characters alone they went very different paths towards their entities and that makes sense considering the Corruption requires a life to infest, where the End is. You know. I stand by my “all avatars succumbed to their entity by fleeing from another”(like Elias to the eye fearing the end) i think Oliver ran from the end and found comfort in the end but in a new light. Jane I think always did have the fear of corruption with her blackhead paranoia and bullying but i feel she really feared the lonely. Her self mutilation in mortality is her way of doing something about the rejection she experienced, even if it didn’t really help anything. She first fears corruption because all her life she was demeaned for filth, and grew up thinking she was rotting inside everyday. Her choice to then change from picking at her skin in self disgust to loving her pock marks because they held home to something that needed her as much as she needed it is hard to not understand at least a little why she’s so elated.

Also the timeline matches up for working the same time.. (oliver is spotted there 2013, jane isnt discovered by cops til march 2014. Ik janes statement only says he came in while she worked n stared at her but. Shhhh) i think they got on rather well. They were both people desperately trying to find relief and hoping something would just finally click in place and they would belong. Jane was rejected from what she centered her life around (just having any connection. Any acceptance, both in herself and everyone else.) and so was Oliver (from life itself. The society he was born into, the events of his life. It was just all too much at once and the lack of childhood info on him from his mortal statement and only the statement towards jon later i think feeds into the idea of him not really even wanting to live on in memory.)

Oliver looks up to Jane for her wisdom when he meets her as a man with some bad dreams here and there and she’s a woman with some pretty terribly dealt with anxiety, which he could relate to. I think he’d talk to her about meditation, trying to find presence in your own body, but she had a very bad reaction to that. He apologizes and she accepts his treat for her lunch break when he comes back into work with an extra sandwich and soup. He sees her unsteadiness in much in life but she’s different with the crystals and cards. She speaks fondly of every gemstone’s meanings and properties, makes a secret drawer for all the gems shaped in such a way she couldn’t handle not being able to buy it herself. She teaches him Tarot, he picks it up quick. He tells her that he thinks the gems suit her. Jane smiles a bit stiffly and says thanks. He clarifies he meant it suiting her as a person, as she was very attuned. She smiles wide and says thanks again, this one natural.

Jane disliked Oliver at first. Self loathing without relief often turns outwards, and he was polite and well spoken and handsome and even had the nerve to be friendly with her. Incessantly. Shes slow to trust. She has to be. She’s played this song and dance and it has to be pity or obligation. She likes her job because for her role she is no longer Jane Prentiss. She’s a store clerk with a nearly encyclopedic knowledge of it’s wares. Oliver offers guided meditation, she has a hard time saying no. It ends badly. He’s apologetic and Jane just doesn’t understand it. The next day he buys her lunch as a apology. Material loss from him (and she knew exactly what his paycheck was and it was NOT lofty. It was only lunch but. Still.) and then the loneliness can’t bear it anymore. She keeps herself from delusions that someone like him would take such genuine interest in her that wasn’t just someone who was overly friendly and didn’t want tension with a coworker. But then they bond slowly. Jane teaches him to read tarot on a slow day. Its just a basic reading but he drinks in her words intently. It strikes her suddenly that this man not only tolerated her as a coworker. He respected her. He really truly felt what she was saying was valuable information. She’s giddy and teaches him more advanced spreads. Oliver has to eventually ask for a break and she apologizes for not realizing and getting carried away and he laughs and says no that was amazing. I’m so glad i could see so much of what you can. She’s thrilled, they go drinking at nights (Oliver is the sober driver).

But then Oliver becomes more despondent. He talks less about his nightmares to her but obviously still has them. She can’t help the paranoia come back. She never did receive closure for being abandoned time and time again. She didn’t expect it now. This final straw is when she catches him staring. THAT was a look she knew. Pity. She picks at her skin worse and worse. Oliver takes over when Jane doesn’t show up for a few days, and he’s walked past her house enough to see the roots and understand what’s happened.

#tma #tma hc #THANK UUUUU #jane prentiss #oliver banks #interrogation

[lovelandfrogman]

just saw that you saw the neptune theater production of ragad???? how was it!?!

YESSSSS it was so good!!!! sorry for the late reply, i just wanted to write out something detailed for this but didn't have the time!

id been planning to go for a while and i'm so glad it worked out! it definitely lived up to my hype, it was amazing!! ill give some very un-expert and very rambly impressions i had, but PLS let me know if you have specific questions about any details or scenes or choices :D

also i apologize im not a True fan of these 2 actors and i dont remember their names so ill just call them by their characters DHSJD

first off heres the set and playbill!!

i was kinda surprised because all the promo pictures seemed to show them wearing modern suits so i thought it was gonna be a modern setting, but it was just colorful old timey clothes! (sorry im not very knowledgeable on costumes, my main impression was just "oooo fun clothes")

oh one costume note is that one of them was wearing a green suit with a blue waistcoat, and the other was wearing a blue suit with a green waistcoat!

another unique thing about the production is it was split into 3 acts, like the script does, but most productions just do 2 acts!

i really enjoyed watching this, both ros+guil were super funny and the audience was laughing the whole time, even near the end like when guildenstern's breaking down, which i honestly enjoyed-- even when it's horribly tragic, it's STILL kiiinda funny. also i liked guildenstern's accent

in my opinion the acting was great all around, i kinda enjoyed the hamlet scenes and how they were acted seriously, since i'm always conflicted on if r&gad should make the hamlet parts serious or not! also guildenstern and rosencrantz's serious and emotional bits hit me so harddd (as in both of their monologues about death i guess)

there was a lot more use of obvious lighting and sound design than i feel like is typical for r&gad? but i enjoyed it!! i'll talk a bit more about that laterrrr

they also had some singing from the tragedians, once in their first entrance, and once replacing the ship noises at the beginning of act 3, which was very fun

one big difference was after the final scene w horatio, they blackout and go back to the initial positions and do a single "heads!" which was GREAT, i don't think i've seen anything else make the time loop that explicit??

ok and now just some rambling about interpretations

so part of me before the play started was like "i've watched/read/listened to this play SO many times, i hope it's not just boring and same-y and i don't realize anything new."

AND THEN. near the end of the first scene where ros+guil come across the tragedians. i was like HOLY SHIT and realized an interpretation that i've never thought of before.

(this might be a Super obvious interpretation and i'm just slow but whatever.) it occured to me that the moment that the tragedians are about to put on a play for ros+guil and the scene suddenly shifts to hamlet, it could be interpreted that the rest of the play is just the tragedians putting on one of the classics for ros+guil, and them getting "caught up in the action".

of course this doesn't make sense with Everything in the play, but it's SO fascinating to me and it recontextualizes a lot of stuff, like making it so that ros+guil are just fucking around backstage and onstage trying to figure out their roles the whole time in this play that's suddenly started around them.

also there's a couple choices that i think support this interpretation, like tending to switch to a warm stage-y lighting whenever scenes from hamlet are going on, and switching back to a cool neutral whenever ros+guil are "offstage".

plus, i think this happened a couple times but notably when hamlet is doing his "to be or not to be" speech and rosencrantz is trying to figure out how to interrupt him, there's this super interesting lighting effect where they have a spotlight on the BACK of the stage where hamlet is, and these lights near the bottom of the stage that give the impression of stage lights, making it look like the stage is reversed and hamlet's on the side facing the audience while ros+guil are upstage. IDK if that makes sense but i was like HOLY SHIT when i realized.

PLUS, im fairly sure all the actors playing roles in hamlet are all also tragedians, AND between each act, they had the tragedians doing stuff like moving the set, sweeping, etc, on stage, which was very fun..

ANYYYWAYY those are my thoughts :D not gonna tag this bc im embarrassedddd but feel free to rb and feel free to ask questions

[dazzasarchives]

Fantastic Four Volume 1 Issue 7.

Alright in the last issue the Fantastic Four faced off against two of their most well known villains, Namor the Sub-Mariner, and Dr Doom. This issue introduces a new villain from us from the mysterious planet X. Let's see what shall happen shall we?

After the Fantastic Fours previous missions, they have been regarded as heroes of earth. Everyone loves them, celebrities and other famous elites are coming are all wanting to meet the Fantastic Four. Well with all the well wishes the Fantastic Four are then invited to a dinner at the White House.

As they are headed to be honored by our nations leaders, the mysterious Kurrgo, from planet X sends down his robot to, alter how people see the Fantastic Four. In doing so the assembly gathered to honor our heroic team then begins to attack them. The Fantastic Four escape in very cartoonish ways, but it's very fun.

The Fantastic Four then discover the ship of the Robot fo Kurrgo. They and the Robot meet atop the Baxter Building, where he states the foundations of his villainous plan. All of earth is against the Fantastic Four, and the only way to stop it is for the team to travel to the planet X.

The Fantastic Four arrive on planet X where they meet Kurrgo, the master of planet X. Kurrgo tells the team that an asteroid is hurtling towards his world aimed at destroying the planet. He is wanting the Fantastic Four, mainly Reed Richards, to figure out a solution because they only have two spaceships on their planet.

The Four try to battle Kurrgo's Robot but it is to no avail. Mr Fantastic then agrees to help Kurrgo and his people. This has the team working insanely fast to find a solution to their problem.

Mister Fantastic creates a shrink ray, able to shrink down the entire population and place them on a single ship to a new hospitable world. Kurrgo decides to no longer regrow his people once they reach their new home, so he can assume control once again. Though he is too late, as the Fantastic Four, and the people of Planet X are safely en route to either their homes, or to the new homes they will find in the cosmos.

Yeah so the plot for this comic isn't all that much. Though it is very nice to see Reed use his brain more, I've noticed that after this point he is a bit more of a critical thinker despite some of his solutions being very corny. Now let's get to our character analysis.

I like Reed much more in this one. He's starting to use his intellect more instead of just proclaiming he's a genius. He's also stepping into the role of leader much better than I assumed he would this early on. Anyway I would say my opinion has yet again grown.

The Human Torch, I actually like him a bit more in this comic. He goes to make a sacrifice play at one point but he does survive it. Also I'm starting to like The Thing and his relationship much more now. Id say my opinion of Johnny has gone up this year.

Sue, you know it's bad when this is the only character I have to go back and flip through to see what she's done. Oh that's right damsel in distress unless chased by united states military which she's able to easily evade. My opinion on Sue stays the same, I don't think it'll get much better anytime soon.

The Thing, again I love him in this issue though he takes a back seat during act two, but act one he really shines. He relationship with the Human Torch has gotten better, and he finally feels fine with being how he is at least for now. My opinion on the Thing is unchanged but still my most favorite member of the team.

Kurrgo, and his robot are really fun villains. They're goofy and the designs are just completely out there, mainly for Kurrgo though. When I first saw him I thought his big head was just covered in wrinkly skin, until I realized it's covered in fur. I also like that his robot is just called Kurrgo's Robot, instead of Kurrgbot, not every villain needs a Doombot, or a Lexbot. I also love that the main problem for Kurrgo is that his people only have two spaceships, and they could have gone anywhere in the universe but they went to Earth. Anyway they're pretty fun villains.

Alright that's all for this post, we'll also be taking a short break away from the Fantastic Four as we expand the Hero roster of the Marvel Universe. The next hero we will be taking a look at might astonish you. Until next time.

I do not own any of the images above they are all property of Marvel Comics.

If you would like to visit the site that I use to follow these stories in chronological order please visit this link here:

Want to take a look at the next post in this series? Then go ahead and follow this link here:

Did you miss the previous post? Would you like to go back and view it? Well then follow this link right here to do so:

Or is this your first time seeing my posts, and would you like to start all the way at the very beginning? Well then follow this link here:

#marvel #marvel comics #marvel universe #earth 616 #marvel 616 #ff #mr fantastic #mister fantastic #reed richards #invisible girl #susan storm #the human torch #fantastic four #the thing #johnny storm #ben grimm #benjamin grimm #kurrgo #planet x

[aro-sora]

Heartless

This month's Carnival of Aros theme is "Humanity and the Non-Human" and these prompts were particularly resonant with me:

It’s been a fairly well-documented phenomenon that many aromantics tend to feel some sort of connection to some sort of fictional non-human species, whether as specific examples, or as a whole. If you relate, what are your thoughts on these characters and concepts as an aro(-spec)? Do you have any experiences in any subcultures related to non-humanity, such as Voidpunk?

So I thought I'd write something about my personal experiences.

It will come as no surprise to people who follow this blog that I am a heartless aromantic and I'm also a huge Kingdom Hearts fan. (To anyone who isn't familiar with KH, in the games there are beings of darkness called Heartless. There's a lot of designs and some are cooler than others so here are a few of my favorites:)

[ID: Various Heartless from Kingdom Heartles, in order, a Shadow, a Neoshadow, a Soldier, and a Darkling. End ID]

These beings are both literally and very much not literally (it's complicated) heartless. They are manifestations of the darkness in people's hearts and seek to steal more hearts to transform into Heartless.

(something something beings that are recognizably human but also . . . not and yet still have the instinctual desire to reclaim what was taken)

A common stereotype about aromantic people is that we are heartless and unfeeling because we don't experience romantic love. Aromanticism may influence a person's emotions and definitely impacts views on romance, but to say that all aros are cold and emotionless is hurtful and arophobic. But I also genuinely identify with the term "heartless." Not feeling romantic attractions makes me feel alienated from amatonormative society, and "heartless aro" is the best way for me to describe that feeling.

My love of Kingdom Hearts is also a huge influence on that. When I say KH rewired my brain, it's only a half joke. I was 5-6 years old when I first discovered these games and this bizarre Disney/Final Fantasy crossover was a very formative experience. "Heartless" is not just a way to describe my aromanticism, its a defining aspect.

What is it, to be Heartless? To be human, once, but now something . . . other: a being born of darkness. Darkness is a force that is often used for evil, but still KH makes a point of not making it inherently evil. Darkness exists in every heart. It can overwhelm, but it can also be accepted and mastered, like in Riku's case. To choose to become Heartless, in Sora's case, is a defining moment of humanity.

My blog url might be aro-sora (because let's be honest, he's super arospec) but the title, "My Heart Belongs to Me," is quote from Roxas, one of the best examples in KH of someone being denied humanity for supposedly not having a heart, yet being one of the most caring and emotional characters in the series. He's not an actual capital-H Heartless (that's Sora, briefly) but his story and his struggles just . . . resonate with me. "I am me! Nobody else!" I want for people to stop thinking of me as something I am not, as desiring relationships I don't want, or even being a gender I am not.

I don't have much experience with voidpunk culture (but now I want to look into it), but recently I discovered the term otherhearted: "Identifying strongly with something nonhuman and/or fictional, without literally identifying as that thing." (I'm a bit on the fence between being otherhearted and otherkin, but otherheart literally has the word "heart" in it and the KH influence is strong.) It's a very queer experience to want to change your identity and be something other than what people see you as. Sometimes I imagine that for myself—claws of darkness, eyes of burning gold. Darkness cannot exist without light, but neither can light exist without darkness. Nothing can destroy me, because I am the shadow at the very heart of the world.

I guess that would make me Heartless-hearted. An ironic term, I know, but similarly to my personal heartless aro identity I find it absolutely hilarious. So many parts of my identity are "contradictions": being bigender, being human and heartless. It fits with the lore of the Heartless themselves: some technically do possess hearts and some don't. (it's complicated)

I call myself heartless the same way I call myself queer. Bigots will use them as insults and an attempt to make me lesser and other and nonhuman, but to me these are my words. They are mine and I give them power, no one else. Someone thinks I'm "heartless" for not experiencing a certain feeling? Fuck them, I AM heartless. And I am still human because I choose to be, not because humanity is something to be given or taken away. I don't have to prove anything about myself to anyone. I define my own heart, NO ONE ELSE.

And if they still think that being heartless—being aromantic—is something "wrong" or "unnatural" or not human? I only have a warning for them:

Beware the darkness in your heart. The Heartless prey upon it.

#kh #carnival of aros #a carnival of aros #aromantic #aro #heartless #heartless aro #otherhearted #my ideal gender presentation is either a mix of masculine and feminine or literally just a neoshadow. or a darkling #semi-related note: the terms “Heartless” and “Nobody” make sense for their respective beings and I will fight anyone who says otherwise #i was very tempted to include images of the wackier heartless designs but it would have taken away from the point #non kh fans reading this i highly recommend browsing the kh wiki and seeing all the designs. some are . . . interesting #like scar. yes. scar the lion from the lion king #you may have heard of him #i also use loveless and lovequeer but mostly heartless because. as i said. the kh influence is very strong #it's about beings that USED TO BE human but AREN'T ANYMORE yet still have that instinctive desire to restore their missing heart #*gestures wildly to the air* DO YOU SEE MY POINT #ITS ABOUT A SCARED CONFUSED BOY HAVING EVERYTHING TAKEN AWAY AND HUMANITY DENIED FROM HIM YET STILL SO PAINFULLY HUMAN #i'm going to go cry about roxas now #happy spooky month everybody!

[dany36]

well, i did it! i finished the main story for granblue fantasy: relink :) junk thoughts below (with spoilers)!

first, the things i liked!

the gameplay. i love love love how dynamic and fast-paced it is! i'm boring and my main character throughout the entire playthrough was djeeta: i tried playing as katalina but idk lol i think i was just too used to djeeta to fully switch to her. plus i think her CPU does a much better job of playing as her. when i played as io during one of her sidequests was also pretty fun but i just had to stick with djeeta! leveling up her Artes and then going ham on enemies with them all leveled up never got old. also doing link attacks and skybound arts is soooo satisfying, especially when it would deal the final blow to a boss! i have to admit at first it took me a while to get the hang of it, especially dodging/blocking enemy attacks and i kept going into critical condition or whatever, but once i got better at it, doing quests and fighting bosses was something i would really look forward to.

the bosses. ok i gotta say, granblue fantasy:relink has some of the best boss fights in a video game i've ever played. i mentioned it in my previous posts but i swear almost each boss had a different interesting gimmick instead of it just being "keep attacking until it's dead". i think my favorites were excavillion, when you fight the machines using rolan, fighting as bahamut, and of course the final battle where you're trying to rescue Id. like the boss battles were just so insane and a lot of stuff would be happening at once especially when they'd go into overdrive, but running around jumping trying to evade their attacks, although intense, is part of the fun of these battles!! idk i'm just really impressed with how dynamic these boss battles were and just gotta say hats off to the team that designed them, just super fun and satisfying to play through.

main character selection. ok as someone completely new to the series and not having looked up anything about this game beforehand other than what i saw in the official trailer shown in one of the state of plays, i had no idea you could choose the gender of the main character, so this was a pleasant surprise! i mean, other than her atrocious first outfit before you get to chapter 4 or whatever it is when you get your real armor, it's cool that you can just decide what gender your character is cus i mean, it doesn't really affect the story in any way so at least i'm not stuck with the default silent male protagonist :P

the music. coming from having played the last few entries of the tales of games, it was definitely great to hear some music that actually makes me feel something and isn't just background noise. i'll have to give the full OST a proper listen without me being distracted with a fight, but yeah for sure looking forward to reliving the experience with the music! edit: ok now that i'm listening to the OST with headphones on i can honestly say this is one of the best video game soundtracks i've ever heard in a game. like, i knew it was good and i knew there were some bangers in there but my god i just wasn't paying enough attention to it because i was too focused on the battles. like yeah the folca theme and the first forest section you entered i remembered being so good but like. excavillion primal III. managarmr primal II. seedhollow castle battle. ruined city vallion battle. and i'm not even done yet. what the hell what the hell the OST alone is enough to make this into a fantastic game holy shit.

post-ending content?? ok i only did the first quest as Id but i thought it was cool that, although the main story only took me 19 hours to complete, it looks like there is a LOT left to do as part of picking up where rolan left off + new quests?? plus i still need to finish the side chapters for the characters i'm interested in, so yeah, even though i finished the main story, there's still much to do!

rolan. what a cool chill dude. i mentioned in my post that i thought it was really neat how he turned out to be one of the most powerful characters in the game (i thought he was going to betray us or something), and was so sad when he first "dissolves" when fighting angra. i thought it was Id who was going to be sacrificed at the end but, glad that Id joins the party even if that means that rolan is now...floating in between dimensions or whatever. but don't worry, we will save you, mr fix it dude!

the story. again, as someone completely new to the series, i think the game did a pretty good job at catching you up with what happened in the previous game and giving you the background story of each of the crew members that are already there. and even so, the main story that develops throughout the game was interesting enough to keep me hooked. i mean it's nothing out of this world like i'm used to with other JRPGs i've played: there wasn't really any character development other than Id and MAYBE Rolan (Zathba also?? idk), since the crew that you're traveling have already traveled together in the previous game so they all know each other and whatever development had to happen happened in the first game (from what I understand), so i mean, i guess that was also different but can't complain too much since it looks like this game was born from a mobile game.

ok just something i thought was cool was in the final battles where your former enemies (i forget their names...it's the sword lady and the huge dude) join you in the fight and THEN zathba + other people you helped along the way bring their ships and help you against angra...like...damn, that shit was cool! another instance of these boss battle keeping it interesting!!

and now....for the things i didn't particularly like + other misc. thoughts.

the character side chapters. ok i think the first two or so of each starting character are great for catching up us newcomers, but then after that....idk, i wasn't really interested in the story that they'd be trying to tell. like, i know i'm not done with all of the chapters for any of the characters, so my mind might still change, but so far, not really impressed lol. they aren't really engaging enough for me yet and can...actually be quite boring with the storytelling! but oh well, we'll see if my mind changes once i'm done with the starting characters quests!

the overworld. i can't say i really missed having an overworld that would connect all of the levels. thinking back, most of the overworlds of other JRPGs i've played are quite boring to traverse through and the only reason you go through them is for treasure or finding new armor, which here in granblue you get them through quests. so, while not having an overworld is not something i'm used to, i'd say for this game it was fine not to have it.

the town sidequests. i mean, they're your typical fetch sidequests/defeat X monsters which don't really involve any interesting engagement with the NPCs that are requesting your help, so i'm a bit disappointed that that's all these sidequests are instead of something a bit more appealing.

the characters talking during boss fights. A LOT. like, i decided to play it in japanese and man, sometimes it'd be hard to keep up with what they were saying + paying attention to what's going on in the battlefield. especially in the last battle lol rolan was going on and on about...idk SOMETHING and i'm out here trying to stop Versa from fucking destroying the world haha. i mean just a minor nitpick but yeah

ok this is getting longer than i thought it would lol but despite the few negatives there at the end, i gotta say, i'm now a fan! i DOUBT i'll play the first granblue since...it looks like it's a turn-based game and i am terrible at those, but i'm really looking forward to where the series goes from here! i'm glad i decided to pick this up and kinda regret not getting the deluxe edition lol but oh well! there's always next time! :) but heck yeah, just overall had a pretty damn good time and can't wait to do more quests!

#granblue fantasy relink #granblue fantasy #gbf #gbf relink #junk

[nimhmistsong]

I HAVE FINALLY DEFEATED RUINA!!

After that, I tried lobotomy corporation and Limbus. Playing both a fair bit to get a good sense for them before making any judgments. These are my thoughts so I can come back, and any mutuals can ingest my thoughts. Because I do recommend all 3, but want to clarify why. With minimal spoilers other than names of characters met right off the bat.

Library of Ruina

Card/War Game - It's kinda hard to describe. You have an entire team and complete control of what's in their decks. Able to customize and use whatever play style you see fit. With each floor/team having unique unlockable abilities to further specific play styles. You face waves of enemies with your teams. Sometimes only one wave or one powerful boss. Many fights are battles of attrition, (Philip and your 7 stage fight you rat bastard) or if that's too hard you can always (just about anyways) unga-bunga your way through things. Some of my hardest fights became trivial when I gave up strategy and just HIT IT HARDER, REPEATEDLY!!

Stress - 6/10 Rising Stress. It starts out pretty manageable. Not an easy game, not a hard game. But difficulty spikes beware!! The final stretch of the game is a lot of really hard fights back to back. It is mentally exhausting. It took literal weeks for me to get through. Beating one maybe 2 bosses a day if I was lucky, and that is just the final stretch. This starts about the middle of the game and rises. So unless you like/can manage high tension and stressful game sessions. I don't recommend for relaxing. It is not a relaxing game. It is a 'clear your schedule because this will be all you have energy for' kinda game.

Style - Sprites are great! The horrors look horrifying and the cute things look cute! They have a fully animated anime opening. Each character design is unique and if you put a Ruina character in front of me. 7/10 times id be able to tell! Each one is charming in their own right! Does have an issue with text on cards being so tiny you can't fucking read them. So I often had to look up cards/bosses on the wiki just to read their effects. So beware my fellow shitty eyesight friends.

Lobotomy Corp

Management Gameplay - Lots of facets and things to handle. Very good game for this genre. Tutorial is good at explaining everything! Walking you through every important step. Disclaimer: I just suck at these types of games. Which does effect my opinion.

Stress - 8/10 Again, I suck at management games. I played to max out the first two teams. Then I got too shaky and stressed.

Style - Functional for the game it is! It does share the Library of Ruina problem of 'WHY THE FUCK IS ALL THIS IMPORTANT TEXT SO TINY MY SHITTY EYES CANNOT READ IT!!?!' Other than that it is cartoony and cute. While being able to express all the horrifying things that come with the setting. 10/10

Limbus Company

Gacha Game! - I love gacha games, but my luck is dog shit. So they don't love me that's for sure. The actual combat is simpler than RUINA and eaiser to read. Also way faster. While still being pretty complex allowing for strategy.

Stress - 4/10 Way less stressful than RUINA and Lobotomy Corp. Still enough I have to think about what I'm doing. It's a good pass your time game. Instead of a - 'I must have a clear schedule today so I can throw myself at this one obstacle over and over again without interruption' - kind of game.

Style - You can see the sprites are a big step up. The animation in combat is also way more fluid. Everyone is fitted and looking great as usual. (except Vergil who looks like the bus hit a bump and he fell out of bed after a hell of a bender then refused to bathe or change that morning) Personally, outside of Charon and Dante (MC), no character really stuck out to me though. Not to say the designs aren't appealing. They just hit you with a lot of characters at once instead of a slow introduction to each. Which makes it hard to focus on any one in particular.

Well, that's my thoughts for anyone who has nothing better to read! Thank you random person who convinced me to buy these games when they were on sale. Best $16 I've ever spent! Highly recommend even at full price if one of these games sound like your kind of game! Each were released within 2 years of each other. Showing vast improvement between each game despite that small amount of time! You can also play any game in any order, and still get the full story!

For anyone who has already played these games and read anyways. Hello!

#library of ruina #lobotomy corporation #limbus company #hmmmmm #game opinions #this is also a journal because I'm a forgetful fuck and will keep replaying the games if i forget what my thoughts were #note i played the early game for both #this has no bearing on the later levels and is based entirely on my own opinion

[sleepymarmot]

Vertigo (1958)

[Watched on August 28th]

Please enjoy a liveblog of me watching this classic completely blind and having An Experience. (But only if you’ve seen it yourself, because this is one of the films that work much better when you know nothing in advance.)

Liveblog

The first scene between the man and the woman was the height of “as you know”. They just talk and talk in exposition while I spend several minutes trying to figure out whether they’re a couple or father and daughter.

I decided to watch this film right now because I know it was brought up in Laura Mulvey’s article about male gaze and wanted to read it without getting spoiled, and I don’t know what exactly she said about it, but I immediately noticed how the man is filmed “objectively” but the woman is shown through his eyes, following his line of sight.

Glad I know nothing about the plot because I’m genuinely intrigued.

Has she really not noticed an extremely obvious trail even once?

Oh my god I misread the dates on the headstone as the 20th century instead of the 19th and kept thinking Carlotta died just before the events of the movie. Well, this makes more sense now!

Really pretty shots with the Golden Gate Bridge.

My late grandmother must have looked a lot like the main character when she was young… They were probably born around the same time, she wears her hair in a similar way to what I remember...

Bro I know she’s the other main character and the two of you are probably going to have at least some romantic tension, but why are you grabbing her hand like that, she’s married to your friend…

I am hoping more and more that we’ll get a recap of the entire film from her POV at some point. Like her hiding in the hotel room when he came in to check, or listening in to his conversation with her husband on the phone.

This black-and-white outfit slaps

I’m glad I know nothing about this movie because I genuinely have no idea whether it’s going to be supernatural or not

I didn’t expect her to die so soon. There’s 45 minutes left! So what now? Has the husband been driving her mad to take possession of the inheritance? Is the film going to be about him from now on?

Damn, the effects in this dream sequence did NOT age well

I like how the film draw attention to the 50s pretty women looking indistinguishable. I kept wondering whether Midge and Madeleine were played by the same actress!

Huh, I suspected that she threw a fake body, but didn’t think she wasn’t alone!

Oh, so the dead body wasn’t fake, the living one was.

The film really shifted POVs, and not in a way I expected. Now we know what she’s thinking but have no idea what the fuck he is.

Oh I bet there’s class commentary on this too. I can see where the gender commentary is. I thought the perfect alluring image of upper class white femininity, mysterious and vulnerable, was just a patriarchal cinema convention, but it’s actually constructed even within the fictional universe! What a pity, to know that a man does not want a real you, only a mirage designed to be as stereotypically attractive as possible. “If I let you change me, will that do it? If I do what you tell me, will you love me?” “Yes. Yes.” “All right. All right, then, I’ll do it. I don’t care anymore about me.”

Either he has figured it out and is trying to set up a trap for the murdering husband, or he’s oblivious and poor Judy needs to grab her IDs and run far far away asap

Like, I have to be fair to the dude. From his perspective, he found a woman who is somehow an exact copy of an innocent who’s been murdered by a ghost. He’s living in a fairytale now, as far as he’s concerned she might as well be some magical changeling and if he believes enough he can bring his beloved back or something.

It’s amazing how makeup can change a face — she’s a great beauty as Madeleine and barely noticeable in Judy’s garish facepaint

Oh no is he going to push her into the bay now

“One final thing I have to do.” Nooo motherfucker

“And then, I’ll be free of the past.” Noooo

Oh he’s not pushing her into the water, he’s pushing her off the top floor

Can she push him off instead? Please Mr Hitchcock

Noo why did she kill herself at the last second??

What? That’s the end? He didn’t even jump after her?

Well this was a great movie until literally the last minute. RIP

Why are women so in love with this below average guy anyway???

Rating: between 8 and 9, I think.

[End of liveblog]

Full disclosure: I am publishing this “review” months after watching the film itself, because after reading Mulvey’s “Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema” I fell into a research rabbit hole, got my hands onto a bunch of academic writing on the film, and didn’t want to post my thoughts on the film until I went through it all, in case my future self wanted to make this movie review double as literature review.

I read “Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema” immediately after watching the film (fighting for my life throughout the psychoanalytical sections, and skipping the paragraphs about the films I haven’t seen yet). Turns out, the analysis of Vertigo takes up only two and a half paragraphs, but it spoils everything so I’m glad I watched the film first. These paragraphs are, of course, quite insightful, except for one weird part where the author describes Judy’s acquiescence to Scottie’s demands as “exhibitionism” and “masochism”. I hope these words had very different connotations half a century ago, because this sounds like downright victim-blaming to me. The current day meaning of these words would imply that Judy enjoyed what was happening, and she made it very clear that she didn’t.

Another essay, “‘The look,’ narrativity, and the female spectator in Vertigo”, written by Karen Hollinger more than a decade later, is a more thorough analysis of this film alone that takes into account the shifts in POV I mentioned in the liveblog above, but to my disappointment, it also describes Judy’s attempts to mollify Scottie as “masochistic”. For the sake of my own sanity, I’m going to assume that word really meant something else in old academic writing.

“The Critic as Consumer: Film Study in the University, Vertigo, and the Film Canon” by Virginia Wright Wexman is a much more grounded essay: it does away with psychoanalysis and talks about the film in the context of its production, which was pretty informative, as well as provides the class commentary I wished for in the liveblog. It was enjoyable to read an analysis based on the material realities of the world that actually exist, and not on someone’s fever dreams. This might be my first dive into this corner of academia, and I was unpleasantly surprised to see people spend so much effort on a methodology that seemed so obviously inadequate to me.

I went through 5+ more articles in addition to the ones I named above, but that reading had diminishing returns. The more I read, the more familiar with the material I became, and the less interesting it was to read other people’s analysis, especially because I kept disagreeing with it. Broadening my horizons in this way was pretty fun and I don’t exactly regret it, but the process wasn’t a great use of my time and energy, and actively demotivated me from watching more films because after months and months I still wasn’t done with this one.

Here’s something I learned from one of the articles: there doesn’t seem to be a singular canonical explanation for whether Judy fell accidentally or jumped to her death on purpose. The initial screenplay, which I found online, indicates it was an accident; Kim Novak herself said in an interview that it was suicide. Not only did Hitchcock not show what happened, he didn’t seem to bother to either inform the actress of his interpretation or come up with one at all. That's how little he, and therefore the film itself, cared about the main female character. Nothing matters but the man and his trauma. Scottie’s storyline is concluded poetically regardless of the reason why Judy falls, but Judy’s own storyline is literally dropped as if it was never there.

#vertigo #liveblogs and reviews #blah blah blah #last day to post all the reviews i've been accumulating throughout the year!

[helicopterhelicopter2]

Evaluation

The techniques I've used in my Final Major Project are Unreal, Photoshop and Maya.

Throughout this project I have learnt about a variety of different things such as coding stuff, art design techniques and things in Maya. For example I have learnt in Unreal how to spawn actors around the player character. I used that concept to spawn enemies around the player randomly. Another thing i learnt was how to reuse assets and make slight differences so they look like a totally different type of person for example i have 3 different enemies in my game but they do have the same basis of each enemy. My research helped me be able to find the right sources to use to create the code in my game so it works properly. Also the researchers were able to find the idea of reusing assets to have several different enemies but look similar but with slight differences. When creating my sprites for my enemies and character I have succeeded in what I set out in my proposal or even went beyond my expectations in what I set out in my proposal. When creating my game in Unreal the implementation of spawning in enemies and having them come in waves and then coming back as your ally to fight the enemies once I was able to fully fix this and have it fully work efficiently I was able to meet what I set out to do in my proposal.

I effectively did research during this project. When i was creating my skeletons enemies my first thought was to search up “2d pixel art designs of skeletons” this was where i got some idea of how to start to draw my enemies and what kind of features i wanted in my game. For example when I looked up  I saw that there were just several different skeletons but with the same kind of outline and that they were reusing assets to make a lot of different skeletons like a spear, archer, sword, and shield skeleton and much much more. When I had an issue with my project my first thought was to see if a teacher was available to help if they can then id ask them if not then i google searched up how to fix it and if i wasn't able to fix it then id wait to ask one of the teachers for help. I didn't change my idea that much but while i was making it i was having to change the small details that i wasn't able to implement successfully into my project.

When it comes to meeting my expectations i was able to meet them to a extent where i was happy with it such as my spawning waves of enemies if i was able to work on it some more then i would make them spawn all fully random but at the moment they spawn only around the play in the corners so i've made them spawn left right up and down in a certain amount around the player but they spawn in the top left top right bottom left and bottom right around the player so that is a issue and if i were to improve my project id have that implemented in. So in all my project was meeting the expectations I set.

In conclusion, when it comes to feedback on my game with my peers were giving positive feedback but on one part that was a issue that the games too easy i asked what i should implemented to improve my game and the thing that stood out on the feedback is making their a cap on the amount of enemies that can come on the characters side and help them kill enemies. 

In conclusion I feel like I have been effectively successful with making my project as it met what I proposed and envisioned. I successfully created the necromancy mechanic which where once the player specifically kills an enemy they become your ally and will start to kill enemies. At the start of my project my focus was the art and look of the game whereas my focus should have been on coding rather than art design so as an improvement for future projects I will have my focus in coding rather than art design.

[restwellsoon]

Holy Water Like Cheap Whiskey

Summary: You always heard stories of how seductive vampires could be, but you learned it first hand when you meet a cocky vampire named Dabi, who might be more insecure than he leads on.

/ The hand that meant to restrict grew soft in its hold, its touch more gentle but still firm as if it needed strength to keep you there, as if it didn’t hold you tenderly you might slip from his grasp like ash.

Pairing: Dabi x F!Reader

CW: vampire AU, smut, praise kink

Reposted from my AO3.

You weren’t sure what you drew you into the bar that night. It was unusual for you to have a drink after work, even more so for you to go to a bar alone. But looking back, he was the one who probably called you there. A more whimsical voice in your head called it fate.

The bar was dingy as hell and full of suspicious characters. You should have turned back after crossing the threshold. But there was something about the smoky air and the warm yellow light that made you want to cross its haze and get lost for a moment.

You kept your head down and tried to pay no mind to the looks of frequent patrons. You already knew that you didn’t belong there but you already predetermined that you needed something stiff

Wincing as the bar stool creaked as your weight pressed down on it, you hoped that it didn’t draw the attention of the others again. You glanced to your right. A man with blond hair had his back turned to you as he talked to a younger, pretty woman. Probably trying his chance at love, you thought. To your left was a man with light hair, styled with messy spikes and piercings, though you couldn’t say how many he had as you tried to be discrete with your glances. You blinked before staring straight ahead at the shelves of liquor. Cerulean eyes were staring at you.

Finally catching the bartender’s attention, you ordered. “Corpse reviver No.2,” he gave you a blank stare before you remembered to show him your ID. “…Please,” you added, mostly out of embarrassment.

“You look a little too lively and a little too cute to be dead,” a voice beside you said, referring to the drink you ordered. It was the man to your left.

Turning your attention to him, you looked at him properly. Light hair as pale as snow with eyes that reminded you of a bright lagoon you visited when you were younger. A trio of piercings in one nostril and some cartilage piercings on his ear. The piercings gave an edge to his otherwise beautiful and delicate features. You wondered if this was what a vampire looked like because you’ve never seen a man as attractive as him before. His lean body was casually hunched forward, slightly turned with his face in his palm as he waited for your response.

“Bold of you to assume that I’m not dead inside.”

He gave you a lazy smile in return. “I didn’t rule that out. You gotta be to end up in a place like this.”

Your eyes scanned the area once more. The patrons looked lifeless or at least apathetic to the world around them. Many were alone and had several empty bottles and glasses in front of them. Even the couple to your right seemed off, as if they were attracted to each other as prospects for killing time rather than eternal love.

Humming in response, you realized that he was right. If you weren’t dead inside, you felt barely alive, trying one last shot of excitement in a bar you wouldn’t dare go to if you were in a better state of mind.

His voice cut your thoughts. “Name’s Dabi, and you are…?”

—

It’s not like you intended to go there frequently. You just happened to find yourself sitting in the same corner at the end of the bar, one space to the right of the end that met the wall. You didn’t intend to have a designated spot next to Dabi. It was mere coincidence that he was there every night you came in. It was only twice the first week, then once the second. You stopped making excuses for how often you came after the third week.

You sought comfort in his company. There was something about his haughty comments and the way your name rolled off his tongue that made you want more. You told yourself that you were just lonely.

You wondered if your snow-haired companion was an alcoholic with how often you saw him. You wondered if you were becoming an alcoholic with how often you came there. But you knew. You knew that you weren’t coming there for the liquor.

Every night he sat in the same spot with the same drink, a well glass of whiskey that was always half-full. He only took a sip or two when you met with him and never ordered anything different or drank anymore after you settled in.  

It was a terrible day that dragged its awfulness into the night, you told him as you ordered a fourth corpse reviver. The bartender and Dabi decided to cut you off as you downed it in five large gulps. You’d return back to the land of the dead if you had another one.

“I guess I’ve just been bored…and lonely,” you explained trying hard to find that last word to describe how you’ve been feeling lately. “You nailed me on that first night. I had to be almost dead –if not completely–to end up in a place like this…”

Blue eyes glanced around to see if anyone heard your confession. If they did, they had no reaction. They probably didn’t care. “You really shouldn’t say things like that around here.”

You ignored him. “And maybe I’m dumb but there’s just something about you that keeps bringing me back here.”

Dabi wasn’t your typical friendly face. In fact, all of his features made it seem as if he was made of ice. And yet the snide remarks about your coworkers who upset you or his taunts that made you spill your guts were strangely endearing. You knew he cared –at least in a platonic way– by the way your attention was fully his or how he’d pick up your conversations from the last time you left off.

He was like a fire, wild at first but once you got used to the flames, you realized just how pleasant and warm his presence could be. There was another way to describe how you felt about him.

“I really like you, Dabi,” you blurted out, stating it more factually than as a confession.

He frowned. “You’re drunk. I’ll take you home.”

The conversation went in circles as he tried to get your address from you.

“It’s a house not a home.”

“I don’t give a shit about semantics,” Dabi said as he tried to regain your attention by saying your name. He ended it with a sigh. This was going nowhere.

“Just give me your driver’s license.” You handed it to him without resistance. Dabi should have asked you for it from the beginning.

You reminded him not to mention anything about your age or weight unless he wanted to fight. He looked at you, amused. Even if he was brutish enough to fight you, you couldn’t possibly win. Dabi towered over you and he was strong.

You knew this because he caught you a few times as you swayed in your spot at the bar, deciding it was more comfortable to stand than sit but your sense of balance didn’t want to cooperate with you. His hands on your hips lingered and left burn marks despite the separation of contact with clothing. Or maybe it was only for a second that he held you –not as an embrace but more of a reaction. Liquor had a strange way of distorting time.

“Why would I care about things like that?” He asked. You probably weren’t listening. You were watching the ice melt in his glass of whiskey. “I’d like you no matter what anyway.” It was more of a mumble to himself than him talking to you. You knew you were drunk then. You had to have misheard him.

“Idiot.” You weren’t sure if he was talking to you or himself.

“That my parent’s house,” you told him as you watched him type the address on your license into his phone.

He scoffed. “The fare to get there is out of my budget and I don’t like you that much anyway. Let’s get out of here. My apartment’s closer.” Yes, you must have misheard him earlier.

“You might not like me enough to pay for my cab but you like me enough to take me home,” you sung as you clung to his arm for balance, trying to play off whatever drunken and confused hurt you felt for a moment. Dabi tried not to pull away from your touch, the heat making him shiver compared to the nighttime chill.

The night air wasn’t cold enough to sober you up. Maybe it was the alcohol or the moonlight or the two block walk to his apartment. Whatever it was, you seemed to glow and despite his initial reaction, Dabi didn’t mind your light.

—

Thanking the gods, goddesses or whoever was out there listening, you told Dabi he needed to either move to a place that had elevators or move to a lower floor once you arrived at his place. You were exhausted. “Good,” he retorted back, “I thought you’d get tired from running your mouth all night but I guess it was the stairs that did you in, huh?”

You gave him a pout and surveyed his apartment. It was small and plain with no personal effects. The living room had a couch, small coffee table and a TV on a stand. From what you could see from the front door, his bedroom was just a bed and a nightstand.

“The only way you’re getting the bed is if you sleep there with me. If not, sit your ass on the couch and get some rest,” he said firmly. He knew you wouldn’t take his dare regardless of how many drinks you had.

Dabi needed his privacy. The sun would rise in a few hours and he wasn’t ready to explain himself to you.

You thought about his offer. Would you lay in bed with Dabi? Absolutely. Would you sleep in Dabi’s bed? Absolutely not. You knew you would do anything but sleep with your bar crush, head spinning with thoughts and anticipation, working too hard to think of scenarios that won’t happen. Even at the peak of your inebriation, you wouldn’t have enough liquid courage to take his offer.

Heading towards the couch, you flopped on it dramatically. Dabi threw a blanket at your face before quietly closing his bedroom door. The blanket’s scent was light and delicate, something you wouldn’t expect out of the man. After getting to know him, you realized he wasn’t as soft as he looked, often times taking jabs at you and not caring that you gave him a taste of his own medicine.

—

Lying in wait for the soft sounds of your sleeping breaths, Dabi pulled down his pants with a hiss of relief. Being immortal would be hell if his cock didn’t work.

He closed his eyes as he thought of you. The longer he was around you, the more your flesh appealed to him than your blood. A quiet moan slipped from his lips as he recalled the way your body felt pressed against his in the bar. His strokes sped up with lewd thoughts of you.

—

You woke up with a pounding headache, nausea and exhaustion from a restless night as you thought about your budding feelings for the man. You left without saying good bye or even thank you, realizing too late that you had no way of contacting him other than meeting him at the bar.

—

“Nice of you to show your face again,” Dabi commented when you finally came back to the bar after a week. As memories of that night flooded you, you were too embarrassed to see him again. It seemed like Dabi didn’t care as he continued to talk to you casually. “Thought my messy place might’ve scared you off.”

You thought back to his barely furnished apartment. “No, sorry. I had things to do.”

Changing the subject, you looked down at his drink, his hand nursing it though you knew he probably wouldn’t take another sip. “You’re always here with that half-full glass of well whiskey.”

He shrugged. “I like the burn.”

“But you just sip on it and never finish it. What do you here, anyway?”

Dabi held his tongue from making a comment about being able to finish. It didn’t seem like the time to say it. He gave you another shrug instead.

“Just waiting for the one.”

You were surprised, taking note of his words. The one. Dabi hardly offered up information about himself, usually teasing you instead. You were especially surprised to learn that he came here with a mission of love.

“I never thought you’d be the romantic type.”

“Huh. Romance? I guess some would think of it that way.”

Brushing off the vague comment, you tried to pry out more from the man. It seemed that that was all he was willing to say for the night, instead asking more about you.

—

Used to the bar’s haze and now slowly becoming a regular yourself, you complained to Dabi at your spot at the end. “I only get to see you at the bar. I don’t even know your number.”

Dabi pointed out that you must be tired of drinking because the last couple of times you actually ordered food. “It’s not like you’ve ever invited me over to your place.”

“Let’s go there right now then,” you insisted. A perverse side wanted something more private –these feelings were threatening to consume you– but you told yourself that you just wanted a change in scenery as your true intentions. The bar was growing too smoky, too loud and definitely too expensive for your budget.

He seemed to hesitate at your request. “Next time,” he said before offering to exchange numbers with you.

—

A few nights after your initial offer, Dabi asked if he could come over later in the evening. You waited a few minutes before replying, trying to hide your eagerness.

Nearly throwing your phone across the room, your attempts to not fall for the man even harder were thwarted as he followed up with a request that you wear something nice. It wasn’t stupid of you to assume that this was a date, right? It wasn’t stupid to believe that what you heard and what you felt the night you went to his apartment was real? You felt your anxiety increase as you sifted through your closet for something to wear.

A knock on the door signified that the above-the-knee chiffon dress was what you’d be wearing tonight. You opened the door to reveal Dabi, dressed in a v-neck, dark coat and matching pants. The clothes were neat and pressed, a stark contrast to the plain clothes he normally wore at the bar.

Creamy smooth skin held out a bouquet of flowers to you –your favorite kind, something you only mentioned in passing when you were complaining about how your ex said those flowers were ugly. “Can I come inside?”

You tried to shrug casually as you took the perfect blooms from him “Can’t say no to this bribe, so I guess you can stay for awhile.”

With Dabi crossing the threshold, you tried to hide your nervousness as he looked around your place before settling on your couch. You both already had dinner before meeting up so you set out two glasses of wine instead. He took a sip before setting it down.

He scooted towards the furthest edge and patted the spot next to him. You looked at it hesitantly.

“What?” He asked innocently. “I thought you wanted something more intimate than the bar.”

You clicked your tongue at his call out. “I don’t bite.”

Sitting next to him, you watched as he lounged back on your couch, making himself comfortable. You swore his long legs were bumping into yours on purpose. And you realized that the dress was a bad decision as you felt the light fabric rise against your thigh and Dabi’s eyes follow it.

Taking a swig from your glass, you tried not to compare glasses and decided to slow down your consumption. The only person you could blame for your thirst was yourself.

“Goes down smoother than that cheap whiskey of yours,” you commented, trying to fill the silence with empty words. Your hands idly brushed the petals of the flowers you should have put in a vase minutes ago. Maybe inviting Dabi into your home was a bad idea. Maybe you ruined a good thing by trying to get something more.

“It does,” he noted. “But I told you I like the burn.”

Scoffing, you asked, “That seems to be the only thing I know about you, Dabi. What’s so great about it?”

“I didn’t realize you were so curious about me,” he noted with amusement. “What else do you wanna know? My shoe size?”

You balked at his suggestion. He teased you but he never went so far as to flirt with you. You felt your mortification roll off of your body in waves of heat and wondered if Dabi could feel the warmth off of you. He did.

You snapped in retaliation to cover your embarrassment. “Quit staring at me like I’m your prey, Dabi. You look like you’re going to eat me up.”

He gave you a lazy smile that reminded you of the first time you met him. “Is that what you’ve been thinkin’ about in that pretty little head of yours?”

—

“It’s getting late,” he said, rising to leave. The sun would rise within the hour. He wasn’t sure of how he got so careless with the time.

“It’s getting late, so stay,” you added, hands reaching out to bring him back down. You weren’t drunk but full on liquid courage, drinking a sip too many to handle Dabi’s heat for the night. A strange feeling in the pit of your stomach told you that if you let Dabi leave now, you’d never see him again.

Noticing the way your hands lingered on his, you pulled away, fingertips burning at all points of contact. You found yourself with melted mettle, bashfulness replacing whatever was in you. Dabi stayed.

“The only way you’re getting the bed is if you sleep in it with me,” you retorted, throwing his words from weeks ago back at him.

“That’s fine,” he said, heading towards your bedroom. “I’d be more worried about myself though, if I were you.”

You followed him towards your bed, asking him for clarity. “You’re playing with fire by falling for a guy like me.”

“What’s wrong with that?” You argued, choosing to fight to hide your embarrassment over your apparently obvious crush. Dabi had spent the entire night teasing you and making a lovesick fool out of you.

Dabi had already thrown his coat over his shoes and was undoing his belt. He was right. You put yourself in a dangerous situation and stupidly you continued on headfirst.

“You really don’t know what kind of moths might be attracted to your flame. What kind of bugs. What kind of bats.”

You frowned at the mention of bats, loyal servants of vampires. Vampires themselves were mysterious creatures, an open secret that wasn’t acknowledged by the government. But you knew they existed. You heard the stories, passed down orally from older generations.

Vampires were monsters. Their looks were otherworldly and they used it to their advantage as they drank human blood for sustenance and turned their victims into servants. They were dangerous and lived among humans seamlessly.

Sitting at the edge of the bed, you looked at Dabi who made himself comfortable. He laid on his side, head in his hand and V-neck shirt dipping low down his chest. Cerulean eyes searched for something in your expression before he spoke again. You looked apprehensive and stiff, the only action proving that you weren’t a statue was your breath. Slow, shallow breaths moved the chiffon of your dress, making it shift slightly against the bed sheets.

“Bats? What are you?” You asked, leaving it open-ended. Maybe this was one of his stupid taunts that you were too drunk to understand. But the threat of Dabi being a vampire had sobered you up moments ago.

“You should know that vampires walk among the living,” he said not quite answering your question.

“And are you…?” You started, not quite wanting to finish your question. He had already answered it anyway.

The shift in colors were your warning as warmer hues painted the sky. Watching in horror and fascination, Dabi transformed under the peak of dawn that seeped in from your window. His snow white hair turned into an inky shade of night. Skin turned a scorched and rough purple below his eyes and the lower half of his face, burnt and untouched skin divided by sharpened teeth. The burns extended down his neck and spread across his collarbones. You noticed the scars that ended just a little past his wrists and wondered if they connected upwards or if there was a break of normal skin between. Where burnt and unburnt met, silver staples held the skin together. The only thing that remained unchanged were his cerulean eyes that glowed like a pale fire.

You stared. “What?” He asked, velvet voice holding onto a sneer. “You’ve never seen a vampire with scars before?” You had never seen a vampire at all until right now.

“Vampires –true vampires– challenge the balance of life and death and are usually turned as they’re dying. I’m not sure which sick fuck thought it would be funny to make it our natural state when the sun rises.”

You thought of the stories of stories of glamorous vampires that lured their unsuspecting victims into the dark and drained away their lives. You thought back to Dabi’s form as you knew him: snow white hair and porcelain skin. His current state of patchwork burnt skin was the real him.

“What’s the point of all this?” You asked.

You should have been repulsed. Frightened. Scared. You shouldn’t have been curious. You shouldn’t have asked questions. But you as scared as you were of the stories of vampires, maybe you were a stupid girl who believed that this one wouldn’t hurt you.

“Your memory’s not working or what? I told you that it was dangerous to fall in love with a guy like me. Now you can see it.”

You saw the way his lips moved soundlessly, half-charred to form the word that defined his existence: monster.

You reached out to graze his untouched cheek, thumb noting the change in texture from soft to rough as it slid down to meet the curve of his face, settling into his jaw.

“The only monster I see is the shadow of the one who hurt you. It looks painful.”

He hummed in agreement. Who was the bigger monster? His bastard of a father who left him in this state or the one who turned him?

“Died on the operating table after that man tried to save me, but it was too late. My body already went into shock.” He had a wistful smile on his face now. The burns made it look like he was hurting. “I suppose the only thing he thought he could do was turn me into something like him. I still don’t understand why he did what he did and whether it was mercy or cruelty that drove him to do it.”

You stayed silent, unsure of what to say. You had spent so many nights trying to reach out to him and grasp what little knowledge of him that he’d offer. When he told you his biggest secret, you were suddenly speechless.

Your hand reached out to his, trying to cover the back of his hand with yours but it was much too small. Finger tips grazed charred skin and staples. You weren’t sure of what words you could say to soothe the vampire but hoped he could feel your compassion. You gave his hand a squeeze. Sometimes silence and presence were the only things you could offer as comfort.

—

The silence was too heavy and too long for your liking. Dabi stared at you with half-lidded eyes and you wondered if vampires slept at this time.

You tried to pull your hand back to let him rest but you felt it move beneath you, a silent action of protest. The blue flame of his soul –or whatever remained of it– flickered to look at you. He was wide awake.

“Should I tell you why you’re deserving of my love?” You asked, voice shaking from the fear of rejection. You had told Dabi once that you liked him so many nights ago and he confirmed it himself last night. Yet despite this knowledge, he didn’t give you an answer and only tried to deter your feelings.

You knew it was fucked up. That maybe you were taking advantage of his insecurities. That maybe he was taking advantage of your feelings. It didn’t matter what either of your motivations were as he let your hands roam his body, slowly removing his clothes and your own.

There was a mess of burns and staples up on his arms and legs, stopping above his knees. He even had some on his hips. Dabi flinched under your gaze, an uncharacteristic action from the otherwise more dominant member of your duo.

“You’re handsome.”

Dabi realized that you said it in the same tone as when you first confessed your feelings to him. You said it in a way as if you were saying that the sky is blue or that the sun was a star. You told him he was handsome as if it was fact that had little room for dispute.

Your hands, though trembling, traced his stapled edges and dragged down his lean muscle, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. His skin was cool to the touch but not as cold as you anticipated it would be. It didn’t feel like Dabi was almost dead as you watched gooseflesh rise on his untouched skin. It felt as if he had been sleeping for far too long and your touch almost brought him back to life.

For once his smart mouth was speechless as he watched you gaze at him with a love in your eyes that he knew he didn’t deserve. It was his original intention to make a meal out of you but as he learned more about you, something in him changed. You burned like the whiskey that he loved so much and made him feel something he thought got burnt away with his nerves: comfort. Now he craved to taste other parts of you instead of your vitality.

You moved closer to him, chests pressing together as you laid on your sides. “I can feel how much you care about me even though you won’t say it.”

A palm pressed to his chest where his heart should have been beating before ghosting down south to his hip. Your palm held his curve and Dabi desperately wished the nerves were intact so he could feel your warmth.

“I’ve been thinking about that night in the bar and the way you held me. I know you wouldn’t let me fall.”

He finally broke his gaze with you to stare at your walls. Dabi thought you wouldn’t notice if he held you for a second longer than he deserved.

Your hand gently nudged at his jaw to make him look at you once more. He hated the look in your eyes and how they burned with an emotion he couldn’t quite place. Was it lust? No, it was something deeper than that. Love? Possibly but he didn’t want to be too arrogant. No, it was adoration, he realized, as your eyes searched his for his soul.

“I guess you finally learned to shut up, but I really do love how mouthy you are,” you grinned at him. Dabi was peculiarly silent during your declarations and you felt a bit of pride knowing that your words could make the normally chatty man speechless.

Dabi watched at your tongue peeked out to lick your bottom lip before he took it in his own. His lips pressed against yours with haste, as if he’d lose his chance if he waited any longer. You found the contrast in texture oddly pleasant as the rough and delicate flesh massaged yours. Opening your mouth, Dabi’s tongue slipped inside. He needed to taste you and you were as sweet as he thought you would be.

He shifted so that he was straddling you and you moaned into the kiss as you felt his hard member press into your thigh. Your legs spread and hips moved to show it its entrance but Dabi teased you instead, grinding against your folds without going in.

Your skin was hot and beginning to sweat with your actions, taking a brief break for air. Dabi watched as you gasped for air beneath him and smirked. “Don’t look at me like that, princess. You’re the one who likes me being mouthy.”

His weight pressed into your skin as he buried mouth at the nape your neck. Arching into him, you gasped as you felt his fangs lightly scratch against the sensitive skin. He followed the motion with the tip of his tongue before leaving sporadic open mouthed kisses that trailed down your body.

Your core was wet and aching by the time he reached it. Two fingers easily slid into your folds. You sighed and wrapped your hands in his hair and pulled when you felt his tongue tickling your clit.

“D –Dabi, I.. Oh fuck,” you mumbled nonsense at the vampire worked your wanting sex. He spared a glance at your face to see the fruits of his labor. Your mouth was slack and seemed stuck between syllables and sighs as your eyes stayed closed. He felt your walls tighten around his fingers. You were close.

Taking in a sharp inhale at the loss of sensation at such a crucial point in your course, you looked at Dabi as he used your wetness to lubricate his cock. The way he looked at your body was nearly sinful and if this was the last image you would see before he sucked you dry, you were fine with it. He gazed at your pussy with reverence before going on his knees to fuck you.

Feeling your walls stretch as he bottomed out inside you, you wrapped your legs around his hips. A hand reached to wrap around him but he pushed it above your head before it could find its destination. His hand was rough as it pressed yours but the restriction was alluring and exciting. You were at the mercy of this powerful being and the only thing he wanted to do was fuck you into the mattress.

Dabi thought that he could look at your face forever as he watched your half-lidded eyes and open mouth. He had never thing anything so beautiful and he was the reason for such an expression.

The hand that meant to restrict grew soft in its hold, its touch more gentle but still firm as if it needed strength to keep you there, as if it didn’t hold you tenderly you might slip from his grasp like ash.

Your fingers engaged with his, slipping into the spaces between digits. They pressed down against his flesh, their touch threatening to scorch with a different kind of fire compared to the one that left him marred. It was the one that he’s been waiting for, a spark that turned into an all-consuming blaze that traveled up from his fourth finger to the dead organ in his chest.

“You look so good taking my cock like this,” he complimented you. His strokes were slow and agonizing. Your hips bucked up in need but his pace remained unchanged. Maybe Dabi was a monster but this would serve as the only evidence as to why.

“And you feel so fucking hot. I wish you could keep my cock warm forever.” He breathed into your ear.

The hand that held his gave it a squeeze at his spoken desire. You wished he could stay inside you forever now that he was fucking you the way that you wanted. His thrusts were harder and made you feel his entire length as he pulled out just before the tip only to slam back into you again.

“Ugh, Dabi, just like that,” you cried out at his head repeated nudged that tender spot inside of you.

You squirmed as you felt your legs shake around him, knowing that you were close. A hand dipped down to rub at your sensitive bud and bring you closer to orgasm.

Dabi could hardly choke out the words in time as he felt you squeeze around his cock. “Want me to fill you up with all this hot cum, pretty girl?”

You nodded your head weakly. You didn’t care what the fuck Dabi did right now as your body shook from your orgasm.

Dabi whispered into your ear. “You’ve been so good to me, letting me taste that cute little pussy of yours and letting me pound it right after. Letting me make you feel good like I’ve been thinking about for weeks…” His voice was getting rasping as he struggled to last a moment longer for you.

“Fuck,” he moaned your name as he came inside you, freeing his hand so he could tangle it in your hair as he kissed you once more. You felt his load inside you, white hot and thick.

Dabi pulled out of you slowly and watched as his cum seeped out. You crossed your legs to keep it inside. He smiled. You were too good for him.

—

The sun was already high in the sky as you two settled in for a nap after cleaning up and a shower.

You wanted to ask him if he understood why you loved him but you were too afraid of his answer. Instead you asked him something equally as painful.

“Was it the right choice to come here last night, Dabi?” You asked. “What if the one you’re waiting for finally shows up to the bar?”

Dabi paused, trying to choose his next words carefully as he held you in his arms. “They wouldn’t have come.”

“How do you know?” You followed up.

Had he already met them during the times you didn’t come to the bar? What about last night? Feeling hurt, both because of rejection and the fact that he didn’t share such news with you, more questions came forth. “Have you already met them? What would they say about you being here with me?”

Leaning in towards you as if he had a secret, you willed your body to stay in place. Dark hair fell into his eyes as his mouth spoke softly in your ear, his warm breath tickling your skin.

“The one I’m waiting for wouldn’t have shown up at the bar last night because she was too busy getting drunk off wine and telling me why I deserve her love.”

Return to Curated Masterlists

#rest writes #dabi x reader

[phykios]

this one is dedicated to mi amor mari @perseannabeth, who is a beautiful bird and a wonderful friend and i am v v vvvvv grateful to have crossed the airwaves with her :”)

Today Was A Fairytale [read on ao3] T, modern royalty, fun at disneyland!

She stares at him. 

He stares back. “What?”

“Really?”

“What?”

“You really think this is going to be enough?” Annabeth points at her head, the blue Yankees cap squishing her curls. 

“Of course! It’s the Clark Kent effect.” As if to underline his point, Percy slips on his fake hipster glasses, except that stupid grin of his is too bright not to draw attention. 

“That’s not a real thing.”

“Sure it is. Studies show that glasses are actually good enough to alter your appearance if someone doesn’t know you well.”

“Then why didn’t you bring a pair of glasses for me?”

“Because your hair is definitely the prettiest thing about you,” he says, automatically tugging an unruly curl which peeks out from under the brim, a gesture so practiced she almost doesn’t register it--until he blinks, dropping his hand, blushing lightly. “I mean--the most noticeable thing. You know. A hat should be fine.”

He looks away. Heat rises to her face, too. Because it’s so hot out, obviously. 

“Anyway,” he mumbles, “um. No--no one’s going to give you a second look if your hair is hidden.”

Chewing her lip, Annabeth can’t help but worry. Percy’s face is extremely well-known, possibly more than hers, and they’ve both spent the better part of three weeks with their faces plastered all over the media on their diplomatic trip. This is probably a really, really bad idea. Then, a thought occurs to her. “How about,” she says, perking up, “you give me your glasses, and I’ll give you mine.” From her backpack, she fishes out a pair of sunglasses, big and nondescript. He’ll practically be wearing a superhero mask with these.

Percy smiles again, and Annabeth thinks she might fly. “Perfect.”

Which is how Her Royal Highness Anna Elisabeth Ingrid Irene of Sweden and His Serene Highness Perseus Alexandros Ioannis of Thera play hooky from their day of boring meetings, insufferable dignitaries, and stuffy security guards, to go see the eighth wonder of the world: Disneyland Resort in California.

And how Annabeth eats her words as they make it past the security gate unchecked. “Eh?” He beams, nudging her with his elbow. “Eh?”

Rolling her eyes, she shoves him back. “Shut up.”

***

[description: a tiktok video which depicts a line at Disneyland. the op, a black girl with braids, covers her mouth and looking into the camera, turning the camera to focus on the two people behind her. one is a tall boy with black hair and sunglasses, and the other is a blonde girl with a yankees hat and glasses. both are white. video text reads: “p sure the people behind me are prince percy and princess annabeth??? um?????”. background audio is a dubstep remix of the fight theme from undertale. end ID]

***

Maybe it’s a little weird, on account of her being actual royalty and all, but Annabeth has always been interested in princesses, both as a matter of historical record (history is awesome) and in the general sense. Like millions of other people, she, too, was raised on Disney movies and tales of princesses and true love, and she was just as captivated as the rest of them. She and Percy used to watch the Disney catalogue whenever their families held state visits for each other, staying up into the small hours of the morning, sharing some popcorn and singing along. 

Luckily for Annabeth, her favorite princess is holding a meet and greet at the Royal Hall.

“Excuse me,” Percy says, approaching Princess Ariel. Well, her cast member, anyway. “Could I get a photo for my friend?”

“Of course!” she trills, her blue eyes sparkling. “It would be my pleasure.” Holding her hand out, perfectly poised and graceful in a way that would impress even Annabeth’s stodgy etiquette instructor, she smiles, warm and welcoming, pivoting to bring Annabeth in for one of those weird, semi-awkward half-hugs. “What’s your name?”

“Anna,” says Annabeth. Hey, it’s not untrue. She’s a little leery of using any of her names, but Anna is common enough. Annabeth? Not so much. Even with her glasses and hat disguise, a little paranoia is justified, she thinks.

“It’s so wonderful to meet you, Anna,” she says, cheerful, with all the grace and charm of someone who doesn’t spend hours saying the same thing over and over again to excitable, temperamental children. What a trooper, she thinks.

“Don’t you recognize a fellow princess when you see one, your highness?” Percy says, grinning that stupid, smarmy grin of his. 

Annabeth glares. Oh, he thinks he’s so damn clever. 

“Oh, of course,” says Ariel, smoothly. “How could I have thought otherwise? Your highness.” And she curtsies to Annabeth, a short dip, her hand placed delicately against her chest. “Perhaps I can introduce you to my friend Anna, princess of Arendelle?”

Still smirking, Percy takes some more pictures, trapping Annabeth into smiling for the camera. She can’t be glaring daggers in her pictures, nor can there be video evidence of her kicking him--no matter how much she wants to.

And she definitely doesn’t miss the way Ariel not-so-subtly checks Percy out, eyeing him up and down.

“You fucking asshole,” she hisses as they leave the photo area, swatting him lightly, and he giggles. 

“Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t resist.”

“Ugh, I hate you so much.”

It’s hard to stay mad at him, though she definitely tries as they enter back out into the park proper, giving him just the barest hint of a cold shoulder. 

“Aw, come on,” Percy says. “I was just teasing.”

“You shouldn’t go around tempting fate like that,” Annabeth says. “Do you want to cause another international incident?”

Percy winces, no doubt remembering the Gateway Arch incident of 2008. 

“If someone recognizes us, we don’t have Zoe or any of her team to protect us,” Annabeth goes on. “Not that I think anyone here would try to hurt us, but…” But it’s a little nerve-wracking, being on her own like this. She hasn’t been alone like this for a really long time.

Wincing, Percy rubs the back of his head. “I guess I forgot you’re a little higher profile than me. Sorry.”

She doesn’t like to think about it, but it’s true. Percy, by his nature as the younger son of a largely defunct royal house, doesn’t have quite the same number of… issues… that someone like Annabeth might have.

Deflating, she uncrosses her arms. “It’s okay.”

“I should have asked you first.”

“It’s really okay,” she says. “No harm no foul.”

“Do you want to get out of here?” he asks, entirely serious. “I can call someone up.”

She knows just how long they’ve planned this, how many favors he’s called in and policies he’s sidestepped. Backing out now would just be a waste of a day. She shakes her head. “It’s fine,” she says. “I’m just… feeling a little exposed, I guess. But, I don’t want to ruin all our plans. Let’s keep going.” She grabs his hand, squeezing a little.

“...Okay,” Percy says. “But say the word, and we’ll call it a day. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good.” Like he doesn’t have any other expression today, he smiles at her again.

It hits her, suddenly. He’s so much taller than she remembers. Once upon a time she used to be taller than him; now, he’s basically a whole head above her. 

It’s annoying. But also… not.

Spying something over her shoulder, his eyes light up, and he practically gasps. “Cinderella!” he points with his free hand, like a five-year old. “Come on!” And he takes off to one of the park corners, dragging Annabeth along with him. 

He has to wait in line behind a pair of twin girls, six or seven years old by the looks of it, in identical Cinderella dresses for a photo, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, and when it’s finally his turn, he nearly trips over himself to go up and ask for a photo. 

Cinderella agrees, and now Annabeth is relegated to the job of cameraperson. Percy slides in next to the princess, his hand on her waist, but, ever the respectful gentleman, loosely held, so the cast member can slide out of his grasp without any difficulty at all.

Taking a few shots, it does look kind of strange to have Cinderella’s beautiful, shining face, and Percy’s enormous sunglasses blocking his. “Take off your glasses?” she says, lowering her phone for a second. 

Dutifully, Percy slips them off, smiling again for the camera. 

Cinderella’s smile doesn’t falter, a credit to her professionalism, but Annabeth can see her eyes widen, just a touch.

Annabeth snaps off a few more photos, “Got ‘em!” and Percy once again gushes over the princess, thanking her for her time. Grabbing Annabeth’s hand again, he practically skips off, leading them in the direction of a nearby candy shop. 

***

me: IM SHAKING GUESS WHO I JUST TOOK A PICTURE WITH????

sis: prince percy?

me: HOW TF DID YOU KNOW

sis: its on twitter already

***

They’re walking along, Annabeth slurping up a Dole whip, when she suddenly stops in her tracks, outside of one of the many, many gift shops. “Wait up a second.”

“Hm?” Percy says, around the giant lollipop in his mouth. 

“I want to get some Mickey ears.” 

Very quickly they get lost in the sea of Disney merchandise, walking the labyrinth of Star Wars and Marvel and Pixar goods. There’s a surprising amount of black for the so-called happiest place on Earth, but things do brighten up when Annabeth finally turns a corner and finds the enormous selection of Mickey ears. It’s a wash of sparkles, flowers, bows, and occasionally characters, for children and adults alike. Annabeth eyes a pair designed like Baby Yoda, eyes wide and ears adorably huge, before she fingers a pair of white Mickey ears that have a bridal veil attached to them, contemplating its counterpart, the black ears for the groom, each ear emblazoned with a sparkling silver “Happily Ever After.”

She looks around. Where did Percy wander off to, anyway? 

Well, wherever he is, hopefully he hasn’t gotten mobbed by a horde of excitable fangirls. Given that she can’t hear any screaming--well, any unusual, non-Disneyland-relevant screaming--that’s probably a good sign. 

Running her fingers over the ear selections, she finally picks out a pair of silver sequined earrings with a shiny gold bow, a tiny, rhinestone Cinderella’s castle placed delicately in the middle. 

Yeah. This one. 

Percy finds her as she is paying for her ears, a pair of his own already on his head, red balloons inside of plastic circles. The sunglasses, she notes with a tinge of nervousness, are tucked in his shirt, and not on his face, protecting his identity. “Oh, check mine out--they light up!” he says, giddy, pressing the button on the side, not that she can tell in the brightly lit shop.

“That’s not why I was looking.”

Walking out of the store, ears firmly in her possession, she looks around again. Percy’s face is out there for the world to see, and no one is giving them a hard time. 

And her hat is really sweaty. 

Ah, fuck it.

She removes the Yankees cap, shaking out her sweaty curls, sliding the ears on in its place.

And the glasses, for good measure.

“Cinderella?” Percy asks.

“I thought you’d approve.”

Outside the shop, next to a corn dog cart, Percy pulls her aside, out of the way of a whole classroom’s worth of children, holding up a plastic plag. “So, confession.”

“Percy…” He didn’t. “We said no gifts!” They had agreed to it that morning!

“Well, see,” he says, fumbling around in the bag, pulling out a black t-shirt. “I saw this, and I thought--I thought you might like it.”

He unfolds it, and Annabeth frowns at the shirt design. 

It’s… a drawing of a man in a purple mask against a solid black background, glaring at the viewer. Circling him, in distressed, white-grey military font, are the words “BARON ZEMO,” and the logo for the show he must star in, Marvel’s The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. She doesn’t really watch superhero shows, though, and she’s pretty sure Percy doesn’t, either. Maybe he’s started this one and he really likes it? “Thanks,” she says, confusion coloring her voice despite her best efforts. 

But he doesn’t look too disappointed. “I was looking through their pride merch, and they didn’t have any stuff with the ace flag, which totally sucks, but then I thought that maybe you might like something a little more subtle? So, yeah.” He shakes it. “Ace pride!”

Oh. Oh, this boy. 

She remembers, so vividly, visiting his father’s summer home on Kalymnos, a few years ago, the summer she turned nineteen, waking up to a banging in the kitchen, noisy pots and pans making a real racket. Granted, it had been one in the afternoon, and Annabeth probably should have been awake sooner, but she had stumbled out of the guest room into the kitchen, rubbing sleep out of her eyes, to the sight of Percy wrestling with the standmixer, making bright, neon purple frosting. The night before, sometime around three or four AM, that weird, liminal hour where the shadow of night just starts to recede, the sky a sweet, soft, dusky blue, she had come out as demisexual to her best friend, saying the words aloud for the first time ever. Loopy from lack of sleep, the moment had passed without much fanfare.

But Percy, dark-circled and still yawning, had woken up early to make her a chocolate cake. By the time she had woken up, he had baked the cake, chilled it, and made two out of the three frosting colors, a beautiful, moist, dark chocolate cake which ended up being frosted with a marbled mix of purple, black, and white, all folding into each other into a kind of colorless, grey sugar. 

Here, now, in Disneyland, she throws herself at him, wrapping his arms around his neck. His arms automatically come up to circle her, hugging her tight. 

She had been worried it had been some kind of defense mechanism. A young girl with an alarmingly high profile, Annabeth had been the subject of intense scrutiny with regards to any romantic entanglements, with critics, tabloid reporters, and fans alike attempting to invent gossip-worthy relationships with every boy she ever talked to--most usually Percy. They did grow up in the public eye together, attending all kinds of events and functions together over the last fifteen or so years. And they did tweet at each other. Like, a lot. They even had their own portmanteau hashtag. But no relationship ever materialized.

She thought maybe she was just being stubborn, unwilling to play the media game. But it hadn’t been stubbornness. It wasn’t about shyness or inexperience. It was real, and it was her.

And Percy hadn’t even blinked.

“I love it,” she murmurs. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he says, swaying her from side to side, just a little. “It was my pleasure.”

***

What’s happening: #percabeth (Entertainment • trending)

@kndrck__ STREAM CHROMATICA: um @TheraUS @SwedenRoyals i think i found your sick royals? #percabeth #disneyland

@wasabiviking: omg werent they supposed to be at some hospital opening today #percabeth

@ChampionSno brando he/him: LMAOOO NOT #PERCABETH PLAYING HOOKY LIKE IT’S ROMAN HOLIDAY

***

“Holy shit,” Percy moans, his mouth full of food. “Oh my God. Dear God in Heaven.”

Annabeth kicks his ankle under the table. “Don’t be rude.”

He swallows, eyes fluttering. “Oh my God, Annabeth. Holy shit. This is the best damn sandwich I’ve ever had in my entire life.”

“A monte cristo?”

“A deep-fried monte cristo! In sweet batter!” Taking another bite, he moans again, just this side of indecent. “Oh my God I love Americans. They are absolute culinary geniuses.”

“Better than Bistrot Chez Rémy?” They had both been to Disneyland Paris, separately, sadly, and Percy had recommended the restaurant to her with great enthusiasm for her upcoming trip. As usual, he was spot on with his food recs. 

He nods, eyes closed in rapture. “By a mile.”

“You’ll have to learn to make your own when we get back home, then.”

He jolts, straightening up, cheeks full of food. Roughly, he swallows. “You’re right! I need to take notes.” And he takes out his phone, hurriedly typing down whatever scent and flavor notes he must be able to discern. “This is definitely challah…”

Plucking another piece of chicken with her fork out of her jambalaya, Annabeth lets her attention wander a little, content to watch the passengers on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride as they float on beside them, down in the artificially constructed bayou river. 

Truth be told, she’s kind of tired. They’ve been walking around all day, and even with the brief reprieve of rides, her shoes really aren’t the kind that deal well with huge amounts of walking. She can already tell that she’s going to crash, and crash hard, whenever they get back to their hotel. You know, if their security detail doesn’t eviscerate them first. 

When Percy had first presented his idea to her, she had agreed without hesitation. They had had a long, dense schedule of public appearances planned for their excursions to the states, and the days had begun to seriously wear them out. Together, they had worked out the kinks, coming up with contingencies, negotiating things to do, all over Discord so no one else would get wind of what they were doing. Prior to this trip, she hadn’t seen him in… probably almost a year. She knows his father had been keeping him close to home for whatever reason, and Annabeth had had a handful of official functions to deal with. Their paths just never managed to cross, up until now. 

She hadn’t realized how much she had missed him. 

It’s lonely, growing up in the public eye. It’s cliche, but it’s true. And while Annabeth is afforded a metric ton of various intersecting privileges, she thinks she’d probably give it up in a heartbeat. It kind of sucks being a living, breathing tourist attraction. 

Growing up, she had her cousin Magnus, and a handful of other assorted children to play with, but she would never say that she had a best friend, or even a good friend, until she’d met Percy. Her mother and his father, famous for their mutual dislike, had put aside their differences to host some kind of charitable dinner for the disgustingly wealthy, and had trotted out their respective children in all their finery. Annabeth, being all of twelve years old, hadn’t really grasped the gravity of the event, and had gotten into an itty bitty little food fight with the then-unknown Prince Perseus, the result of an extramarital affair whom his father had so graciously decided to acknowledge and adopt. 

After that night, they became fast friends, and she decided that, if she ever left the royal life, she’d make sure to take Percy with her. He’s one of the few things that makes her life bearable. 

She thinks about it, sometimes. Renouncing her title. It wouldn’t exactly be hard. There was Magnus, just in line behind her. And it’s not like her family held any executive power anyway. They’re just fancy, historically interesting celebrities. 

Would Percy give up his, she wonders?

“Hey.”

“Hm?”

He looks at her oddly over their dessert, two vanilla-bourbon creme brulees. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she says. “Just tired. Long day.”

“You want to call it a night?”

She frowns. “What’s left?”

“Well, we did Space Mountain, Rise of the Resistance, Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, a few others,” he counts off his fingers, “saw the princesses, got Mickey ears, ate at Blue Bayou… I guess all that’s left is walking around the pier, if you want.”

“Sounds like you two had a full day.”

As one, they almost leap out of their seats, Annabeth choking on her spit. “Jesus, Zoe,” Percy pants, his hand over his chest. “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“Oh?” says Zoe Nightshade, the head of their security detail, who had just apparently materialized out of thin air. “Funny. I could say the same about you, sir.”

Coughing, Annabeth eventually manages to get her air back. “Hey, Zoe,” she wheezes. “How was your day?”

“Eventful. Let me tell you about it in the car.”

Annabeth glances at Percy, who’s looking a little bit like a deer in headlights. Honestly, she’s surprised they even made it this far without one of their own tracking them down. Still, it looks like their game is up. 

...Or is it?

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees a large tour group, approaching on the horizon.

“Sure,” Annabeth says, getting up. Luckily, they’ve already paid, so they can just head out; they don’t need to wait for another big group of people to cross their paths. “Will you let us go to the bathroom, first?”

Zoe squints. She’s always been able to see through Annabeth’s bullshit. But Annabeth has her best, Percy-patented baby seal eyes on, perfectly innocent. Surely, Zoe wouldn’t deny them a physical need such as relieving themselves?

After a moment, she nods. “Make it quick, if you please.”

“Of course,” Annabeth says, looking over at Percy, hoping he gets the message. He stands up, slow and stiff, eyes darting between the two of them. “We’ll be right back.”

They wander through tables and chairs towards the bathroom, her eyes always on the tour group as it just starts to pass by. Reaching out, Annabeth grabs Percy’s hand, and with a turn that would make her track coach proud, sprints out of the restaurant, using the throng of people as cover. 

She thinks she hears Zoe yelling behind them, but maybe it’s just her own laughter. “Come on!” she shrieks, breathless, as Percy’s long legs keep pace with her. “To California Adventure!”

***

darthbingus said: the monarchy are fucking parasites but percabeth is pretty cute i guess :/

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: it’s obviously a publicity thing lmao, also prince Percy is gay???

eowynning reblogged and said: he’s dating rachel dare, right? he can’t be gay 

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: That was a publicity thing too obvs, and Annabeth hasn’t ever been linked to a guy. The king of thera is hardline greek orthodox, there’s no way he’d let his son come out publicly. They’re both gay and pretending to date because homophobia

lardoftheprks reblogged and said: people can be bi and ace and pan and all sorts of things you know

batgirlcock reblogged and said: can you animals leave them alone fr

***

Zoe only spots them after the ferris wheel starts moving. Sprinting over to them, they’re still a full forty feet off the ground by the time she reaches the operator. “Sorry!” she yells down to her, hands cupping her mouth. “We’ll be down in ten minutes!”

“Ananbeth!” he chokes, giggles still escaping him. 

“What?” she laughs. 

“We’re in enough trouble as it is!”

“Exactly,” she says, settling back on the ride. “You’ll probably be grounded for life.”

“Me?” he squawks, playfully offended. “What about you?”

She scoffs. “Please. I’ll just pin it all on you.”

Leaning back, he pouts, arms crossed. “Wow. I plan this amazing day, violate a few embassorial rules, and probably put both of our countries on a massive red alert, and this is the thanks I get?”

“I helped plan it, too.” But he does have a point. “Thank you,” she says. “I had a lot of fun today.”

He turns his head to her, a grin stretching across his face. “Me too.” 

His voice is so soft, so fond. They share a look, a moment, no words between them, only the silence of a true, deep companionship. They don’t need to say anything else, because they already know what the other would say. 

As one, they break away, looking back out into the California evening. 

They don’t talk much as the ferris wheel climbs higher and higher. Honestly, Annabeth is kind of impressed with how well he’s handling himself--she knows heights are a bit of a weakness of his. He grabs the edges of their gondola every once in a while as it drops a few feet, knuckles white and face a little green, but he manages to keep his dinner down, even as the ferris wheel grinds to a halt, Percy and Annabeth at the top of the world. The swing back and forth a little, hot faces against the cool evening breeze. 

And they stay there. 

And stay there. 

And… stay there. 

Annabeth checks her watch. How long have they been up here?

Percy taps his feet, a little too frantic just to be ADHD. 

Finally, there’s a burst of noise from below them, garbled and static. “Uh, yes, excuse me--” the voice says, amplified through a megaphone. “Yeah, um, it appears we are having some… uh, technical difficulties with the Pixar Pal-A-Round. Please remain calm, as we have our best technicians on it, and we are working on evacuating the ride in a calm and efficient manner.” Then the voice cuts out. 

Annabeth glances towards Percy. He has his hands in his lap, fists clenching and unclenching, over and over again. “Uh… you okay?”

“Hm? Oh, sure,” Percy says, “just fine. Peachy keen.” He squeezes his eyes shut, slowly blowing out his breath through his mouth. 

“Hey.” She reaches over, and takes one of his hands in hers, lacing their fingers together. After a long day of holding hands, somehow it still manages to surprise her, how well they fit together, how her skin tingles as she rubs her thumb against his finger. “It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be just fine. They’re going to get us off this ride, and then we’ll fly home and be grounded for life.”

“I thought,” he wheezes, “you’d blame it all on me?”

“As if you could come up with a plan as genius as hiding from our guard in It's A Small World.”

He nods, shakily. “Right. All you. Definitely not my idea. Everyone knows I’d have looped back to Pirates of the Caribbean.”

“Definitely.” She squeezes his hand, scooting a little closer. “Just breathe with me a little, okay?”

They breathe together, slowly and evenly. At some point, Percy takes her hand in both of his, running his thumbs over her palm, tracing her lifelines like a map. His hands are big, and warm, and it seems to calm him down a little, so she doesn’t mind all that much. 

Twilight darkens, stars twinkling against the grey, dusky sky, and still they are holding hands. Eventually, Percy relaxes, slumping against his seat.

“You good?” 

He nods. He still doesn’t let go. “Yeah. Just…” he sighs, stretching his arms up, taking Annabeth’s hand with him. “Not super looking forward to the dressing down I’m going to get.”

She winces. Annabeth’s dad is a little more flexible than Percy’s when it comes to breaches of protocol. The king of Thera is somewhat famous for his paranoia. “I hope it was worth it.”

He whips his head to her, eyes wide. “Of course it was worth it!” he says, as though the opposite were even fathomable. “You kidding? This was the best day of my life.”

“Better than your sixteenth?” His father had officially acknowledged him that day. Annabeth had spotted him in a deserted hallway with his mother, the two of them fighting off a few happy tears. She knows just how special that day was for him. 

“Not even close.” Squeezing her hand, he smiles again, that smile she knows almost better than her own by now. That smile she grew up with, a quiet oasis in a whirlwind of ancient tradition and modern media coverage. That smile is safety, familiarity. That smile was there to greet her when her mother chose to leave her family, when her uncle died without heirs, thrusting the position of heiress on her, whenever she had a rotten day or a bad grade or a lonely night, just on the other end of a phone, or down the hall, or in the kitchen. 

Whatever happens, she knows, Percy will be her best friend. Her anchor. 

Her…

She swallows. “Thank you,” she says again. “I needed this.” A day without an agenda. A day just for them. 

His eyes are dark, and soft, like the water beneath them. One hundred and fifty feet in the air in a broken ferris wheel, there’s nowhere safer she can be. “Me too.”

So she’s not really surprised at herself when she says, “I’d really like to kiss you now.”

Eyes widening, just a hair, he opens his mouth, momentarily speechless. “You--are you sure?”

She nods, maybe a little too enthusiastically.

“Cool. Uh, me too.”

“Cool.”

Neither of them move. 

“So, do--do you want to--”

Annabeth leans in, her other hand cupping his cheek, and kisses him. 

His lips are soft. His mouth tastes like vanilla and bourbon. They are trapped in a metal box, one hundred and fifty feet off the ground, about to get the punishment of their lives when they get down, and it is absolutely, utterly perfect. 

And when Annabeth pulls back, there are fireworks. 

Quite literally.

Percy’s face glows with pink and green and purple, and a little fire in his eyes that’s all him. The pops of the fireworks, loud and brassy, and muted, completely overshadowed by the pounding of her heart in her chest. 

They rest their heads against each other, breathing each other’s air, quiet and intimate, the calm before the storm that is surely coming. But that’s fine. Let it come, she thinks. She’ll be safe with Percy.

When the park technicians eventually get the ferris wheel moving again, Percy and Annabeth disembark from the gondola like nothing’s even gone wrong, waving to the crowd of people, fans, and reporters alike, who have swarmed the pier, phones and cameras held aloft in a constellation of light, before being quickly hurried away by Zoe and her crew, ushered to the end of the pier where Annabeth’s embassy’s car is waiting. 

Percy doesn’t let go of her hand once. 

***

KALYMNOS, GREECE--Prince Percy has arrived on the island for his family’s annual summer retreat, bringing his girlfriend, Princess Annabeth of Sweden, with him for the fifth year in a row, and the third as his official partner. Lifelong friends, the couple were most recently seen at Disneyland Tokyo, continuing something of a tradition for the two royals where they visit Disneyland parks across the globe. Our sources inside the castle are hinting that the family is planning something big this year. Could we see a proposal by the end of summer? Be sure to subscribe for more updates!

#pjo fic #percabeth #percabeth fic #my fic #au #perseannabeth #the rivalry ends here #will i ever stop writing modern royalty aus? no 💖 #also look mari i even used a taylor swift song

[duelistkingdom]

you’d come back to me

chapter four: robotic

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Summary: Seto Kaiba has been presumed dead for four years after the events of Dark Side of Dimensions. His return causes both unresolved feelings of grief to be brought to the surface and the past to be dragged right back up. In hopes of helping Seto move on and reintegrate back into society at large, Mokuba asks Yugi to work on Spherium II with Seto. Never one to leave a friend hanging, Yugi agrees. Over the course of the project, Seto and Yugi both come to terms with their mutual grief and grow towards a better understanding of each other.

Rating: T

Ships: Yugi Mutou/Seto Kaiba, Mokuba Kaiba/Rebecca Hopkins, Katusya Jonouchi/Mai Kujaku

Warnings: aged up characters, grief, references to suicide

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Despite Reiki’s insistence on continued meetings, Seto had been cleared to go back to work for part time hours. He was certain full time hours were being dangled like a carrot in front of him to make sure he kept going to therapy. Despite this annoyance, he was given the chance to escape Rebecca’s general judgemental stares.  It seemed like she was purposefully studying at the dining table just to glare at him. As a bonus, he was able to dodge Pegasus’s phone calls.

He wanted to look at his old projects. Maybe now he could finally objectively examine the AI he’d been working on rather than being so…. What was the word he was looking for? It didn’t matter. Seto had other concerns on his mind. He went back to the room that housed the AI, frowning as he realized the setting seemed to appear different. It was so much more golden now. The false stained glass had a more natural light streaming in from it. And he was surprised when the AI entered. The Pharaoh no longer looked as he did when he possessed Yugi.

Instead, he was regal as he had appeared when Seto met him in his court. He might not have been that tall but he was still imposing nonetheless. Seto’s eyes were drawn to the Pharaoh’s arms, where there was smooth dark skin over taunt muscle. The familiar ache pressed in his chest upon seeing him. He forced himself to look at the Pharaoh’s face. The Pharaoh had an easy going smile on his face, tilting his head slightly. “Been a while, Kaiba,” the Pharaoh stated, a smug look on his face. “Couldn’t stay away from me, could you?”

Seto was a little surprised but figured that it only made sense. He had no frame of reference for how the Pharaoh actually looked in life when he’d last Dueled this AI. Now he knew how the Pharaoh actually looked and the system must have updated with his memories accordingly. This was, after all, as designed. It was supposed to be as close to an actual living person as technology could get.

“You say that as if you can sense the passage of time,” Kaiba remarked, a frown on his face. Could the AI sense the passage of time? Was he better than he thought? Seto nearly rolled his eyes at himself - of course he was that good. At least Seto was being reminded from the jump that he was good at what he did. “Are we going to Duel?”

The Pharaoh smirked and Seto tried to ignore the odd feeling in the pit of his stomach that gave him. “Impertinent as always, Kaiba,” he said as he activated the Duel Disk on his arm. “I’ll let you start first. Give you a fighting chance.”

A surge went through Seto as he activated the virtual system. Still operating smooth enough though he knew it could be better. Almost anything he created could be better. “Fine by me,” he said as he examined his starting hand. Could also be better. He’d need to reexamine his Deck again. There was an option, though. “I’m activating Cards of Consonance, discarding The White Stone of Legend from my hand to draw two new cards. I’m going to end my turn by summoning Maiden with Eyes of Blue! Make your move, Pharaoh.”

“You know,” the Pharaoh said as he drew a card from his deck. “I like your move so much, I think I’ll copy it. I activate Pot of Greed!”

Kaiba raised a brow. “That card’s banned,” he muttered to himself. Was the AI malfunctioning? Or had the banlist changed while he was gone? Perhaps he should give his programming the benefit of the doubt. After all, Seto’s programming tended to be perfect. He should probably simply reexamine the banlist again. “What are you playing at?”

“You’ll see. I’m also activating Terraforming and using it to put Chicken Game in my hand,” the Pharaoh noted and once again, Kaiba was confused. Another banned card? The AI wasn’t supposed to be able to have banned cards in his deck, so Seto decided that he must take another look at the banlist. “I’m activating the effect of Chicken Game, paying 1000 life points to draw a card.” He looked at the card and smirked. “And now I activate One Day of Peace. We both draw.”

“Fine,” Kaiba said, annoyed. One Day of Peace would prevent him from doing any damage to the Pharaoh the next turn. “Can you hurry up, already?”

“Patience is a virtue, Kaiba,” the Pharaoh teased. Seto instantly froze at the sly smirk and raised brow on the Pharaoh’s face. He was certain that he didn’t remember the Pharaoh being this capable of melting him that quickly. Any retort he had died on his tongue. “I’m summoning Witch of the Black Forest and equipping her with Wonder Wand! Now I activate Wonder Wand’s effect, destroying both her and the equipped card, allowing me to draw two cards. Not only that, Witch’s effect activates, allowing me to search a card out from my deck.” He then raised a brow. “And I have bad news, Kaiba. I’ve won.”

“What,” was all Kaiba could get out. “That’s not possible. You just… oh… oh no.”

“You realize what’s happened, don’t you,” the Pharaoh said as he set the five pieces of Exodia right onto his Duel Disk. Exodia the Forbidden One. How the hell did that happen? Kaiba tried to go over the moves in his head before realizing just how obvious what he was doing was. “Exodo Hell Flame!”

Seto’s entire mind was reeling. Surely this was just based on his memories of the Pharaoh doing this exact move to him during their first duel. Yet… no. It was just an improved version of the Exodia stall that he’d done to him already. Surely he was just thinking about it and the program reacted accordingly, even providing the updated strategy. Why was he so uncomfortable now? “End program,” Kaiba shouted, unable to properly modulate his voice. He had to just calm down, right?

That was exactly it. He was overthinking this simply because the program had dredged up an old wound that never fully scarred over. If he could simply relax, then maybe he could come back again to practice properly tomorrow. Maybe he should look into getting a hotel room tonight and attempt to remotely access the code to make sure he was right about his assumptions. He didn’t want to see Rebecca’s judgemental face again - even less so when he was obsessing about something new.

 Of course he’d run into Yugi trying to get out of Kaiba Corp. ‘Run into’ was a fairly apt description as he’d more or less crashed into Yugi. “Watch where you’re going,” Yugi snapped as he got up from the floor. Unfortunately for Seto, Yugi had his sleeves rolled up, revealing that he, indeed, had nice arms. “Are you just gonna stare at me like an idiot or are you going to get up?”

Must Yugi be so insulting? Surely he wasn’t staring at Yugi for that long. “You could have moved,” Kaiba retorted. “Why didn’t you move?”

“I was walking the hallway the way a normal person does,” Yugi said, still having to stare upwards to properly look Kaiba in the eyes. Sure, Yugi was no longer five foot even. Seto, however, was still six foot one and had a height advantage still. Seto was grateful for that. He didn’t know if he could have handled it if Yugi could look him right in the eye without craning his neck upwards. “You were the one who came running down the hallway like a madman. What are you in such a hurry for?”

“I’m not,” Seto said, unhappy that he was obviously blushing. He was, indeed, in a hurry to get out of here. He needed some alone time to think. “I just… have to go.”

Yugi tilted his head and Seto was a little annoyed at how similar it was to the Pharaoh’s head tilt. Must they both have such similar hair? Such similar features? It made it difficult to tell if the feelings Seto was having was simply because of how he’d felt for the Pharaoh or because of something uniquely Yugi.

“You just got here only a few hours ago,” Yugi said, as if trying to puzzle something out. Seto felt instantly exposed. “Why would you rush back home when you’d spent so long trying to even get these part time hours? You know, Mokuba seems to think you and Rebecca don’t get along. Is that not the case?”

Why was Mokuba telling Yugi about how he and Rebecca were getting along? Why would Yugi care? It was none of his business. “It’s none of your business,” Seto snapped. “You shouldn’t be poking in other people’s business.”

“It’s my business if my friend’s girlfriend and my friend’s brother aren’t getting along,” Yugi said, a vaguely amused look on his face. “You know, friends tend to care about things like that. Have you forgotten that Mokuba and I are friends?”

It took Seto awhile to realize that “my friend’s brother” referred to him. There had once been a point when Yugi would visit him when he was in the hospital. This time, Yugi had only visited once and it had been with Mokuba. Had Yugi given up on him? He didn’t know why that thought hurt. “No,” Seto said, clipped. “I hadn’t forgotten.”

“Then are you and Rebecca getting along?”

Seto paused. The truth of it was that Yugi was absolutely right - he and Rebecca were not getting along well. In fact, he’d been considering getting a hotel room for the longest time now. Unfortunately, he had to wait to get his credit cards reissued and a new ID. He’d gotten the new ID yesterday. It had felt strange to look at his passport and see that it claimed he was twenty-one. Time had passed for the rest of the world and stood still for him. Yugi and he were now years apart. Mokuba had grown up in his absence and was now eighteen. It tore him apart. It was unimportant.

“We’re getting along just fine,” Seto said. He wanted to ask why Yugi no longer considered them friends. He was scared of the answer. “Are you done prying?”

Why were Yugi’s eyes like that? He swore that the depth of them might drown him. He swore Yugi knew more than he ever let on. “Suppose I am,” Yugi said. Seto tried to avoid noting the shape of Yugi’s lips when they formed words. He wondered if Yugi was still as good at Dueling as he was four years ago. “You should tell Mokuba you’re leaving early.”

He couldn’t get out of the building fast enough. Maybe it was weird to show up at a hotel and demand a room for the night without any luggage but Seto couldn’t find it in him to care about the optics. The room they’d given him had a single bed and was as empty as any hotel might be. He threw himself onto the bed, looking up at the plain ceiling as the thoughts swirled through his head. He couldn’t stop thinking about the AI taking on the proper form of the Pharaoh and it was an uncomfortable thought. He thought about the thoughts he never tried to think about. The ones that entered his head when he was all alone with no buffers.

Seto hated that these thoughts still had control over him. He refused to let them hold him. He wouldn’t let them hold him. And yet… he couldn’t help but go right back to the thoughts of the Pharaoh’s arms… wondering how his hands might feel on him. A weakness he might never be able to get rid of. He was alarmed when the fantasy managed to warp as the memory of Yugi’s sharp, all knowing eyes came back up. Yugi, who could always see right through him. He didn’t care. He wouldn’t care. Why didn’t Yugi consider them friends anymore? At one point, Yugi had been so insistent on shoving friendship upon Seto. So insistent that they were friends regardless of Seto’s objections.

Now he ached for what he didn’t realize he’d miss. Had he lost out on any chance of fixing that relationship? All he knew was that he desperately needed a cold shower right now.

 “Kaiba left early,” Yugi said as he entered Mokuba’s office, tossing the new proposal for Spherium II onto the young CEO’s desk. Mokuba actually looked a little tired. He wondered if the stress was finally getting to Mokuba. “I got the new proposal done, by the way.”

Mokuba glanced up from his computer. “I guess he didn’t appreciate the adjustments you made to the AI’s deck,” Mokuba remarked. “I’ll take a look over the proposal. Did you decide on a new deck for the AI?”

“How did the AI work with the Exodia deck,” Yugi asked as he flopped right into one of the chairs Mokuba had for guests. He didn’t know how this office looked when Seto occupied it but Mokuba had touches of his personality all over the place. The glass cases were filled with hundreds of Capsule Monsters and the oak bookshelves had comic books which Mokuba had been collecting since he was a kid. The chairs were all the same - comfy and oversized. “If it can’t handle the Exodia deck, then we can’t start on more complex archetypes.”

“Seems it pulled off a first turn kill against Seto,” Mokuba said as he turned the monitor around so Yugi could see what was on it. A recording of Seto’s duel played and Yugi’s heart constricted as he noted that the AI now looked exactly as Atem did in life. He tried to ignore that as the AI immediately pulled through the draw combo, obtaining all five pieces in exactly one turn as Mokuba said. “What were you thinking for the next deck?”

Yugi grinned as he looked over at Mokuba. “There’s a few decks that I’m sure will keep Kaiba from noticing anything amiss for the next time he Duels the AI but… there’s one archetype in particular that I’m certain Kaiba will just love.”

 Seto knew that he wasn’t making good choices right now but it seemed like every time he dueled the Pharaoh now, he was getting more familiar with the current cards. He found that the AI was rapidly improving in its ability to play other decks. This was something Seto was excited about. Something in his code was responding well to being given new decks to use. It was like Dueling an actual, living person that was capable of understanding card advantage and how to best use the cards in the deck.

Coupling this with the fact that Seto was still trying to get back into the swing of things, he had a perfect excuse for why he needed to keep Dueling the Pharaoh. After all, it’d been four years. He needed practice to get better at the game. If he ever hoped to return to the tournament circuit, this was what he needed to do. That was what he told himself, anyway.

He had a long list of excuses as to why this made perfect sense to do. Sure, kc_blimp had a lot of helpful insights as to what the new meta was but… as far as Seto was concerned, the best way to learn the new archetypes was to actually Duel them.

That was all there was to it. As usual, the Pharaoh was smirking when Kaiba entered the room. This time, however, the room was the palace throne room where Kaiba had challenged Atem. He’d long accepted that the room seemed to change. He made a mental note to examine the code later to see if he could make it more stable rather than randomizing locations from his memories.

“Kaiba,” the Pharaoh said with a slight nod, his earrings twinkling in the light and making quiet clacking noises against the gold on his neck. “I see you’re here for another beat down. You know, you’ve gotten worse at Dueling.”

“Shut up,” Seto said, his cheeks turning pink. It was hard to remain stoic when he knew that the Pharaoh had a point. He hadn’t managed to actually beat any of the modern control decks he’d given the Pharaoh. In this new meta, he discovered aggressiveness was indeed better but the Pharaoh was prepared for this strategy. This was actually useful, however. The Pharaoh was, after all, the best Duelist Kaiba had ever known. It pushed Kaiba to do better each time and sometimes, he got close. Close enough where he knew the fault had been that he’d misplayed his hand. “Maybe if I go first this time..”

“You’ve tried going first already,” the Pharaoh reminded him, raising a brow as he activated his Duel Disk. “Are you ever going to give up?”

Of course not. Seto was nothing if not stubborn. He had a plan this time, however. He’d recently added Call of the Haunted to his deck, a card that had been at the suggestion of kc_blimp for a beatdown deck. And yet, when he drew his first hand, he knew this was going to be an uphill battle. He remembered that kc_blimp said that if he couldn’t summon any monsters on turn one, he'd basically already lost against a turn two deck. Kaiba already had experience with that kind of humiliating defeat against the Pharaoh already. “I set a card,” Kaiba said, well aware it wouldn’t be enough to set a trap. He needed a chance to summon. “I end my turn.”

“Is that really all you have, Kaiba? I expect better of you,” the Pharaoh said with a jovial smile that made Seto’s heart skip a beat. He reminded himself that this was just a Duel with no deeper meaning to it. “In that case, I’m going to set a card. I’ll activate this card, Dragonmaid Welcome. With it, all my Dragonmaid monsters gain 100 attack and defense for each one I control. That’s not all it does but, well, that’s all you need to know for now. Next I summon Laundry Dragonmaid!”

Kaiba had never heard of any of these cards before. He didn’t recall giving this deck to the Pharaoh but he must have. He was surprised when Laundry Dragonmaid was… a girl with dragon features in a purple outfit. He assumed that she might’ve been considered attractive to someone that happened to like girls. In fact, he noted a lot of the newer decks featured girls that Seto assumed were meant to be attractive. She giggled and winked at Kaiba. He recoiled. 

“Is that all,” Kaiba asked, surprised to note that the boost only gave her a 600 attack and that she was a level two monster.

“Oh Kaiba, you know better than to assume that’s all there is to my turn! Her effect activates, sending the top three cards from my deck to my graveyard,” the Pharaoh remarked and discarding the top three cards from his deck.

Was milling part of the Dragonmaid strategy? He remembered kc_blimp stating Lightsworn and Twilightsworn heavily relied on milling and that many newer decks had floating graveyard effects similar to cards he’d used in the past. “Next I’m discarding Dragonmaid Tinkhec to activate her effect and give Laundry Dragonmaid an additional 2000 attack! Now, she’ll attack you directly!”

Laundry Dragonmaid’s gleeful demeanor was perhaps the worst part of the direct attack. It hurt and she laughed as she managed to dig her claws deep into Seto. “So you got a new dragon girlfriend,” Seto hissed as he doubled over, holding his chest while his life points went from 8000 to 5400. He wasn’t doing great and he was livid that part of it was simply because of a poor starting hand. He needed to further examine his deck to see how to best avoid this in the future. “Am I supposed to be jealous?”

“Interesting takeaway,” the Pharaoh noted with a grin and a wink at him that sent a flutter in Kaiba’s chest. He hated that even now, the Pharaoh continued to have an effect on him. “Last I checked, she was definitely flirting with you. I end my turn, by the way.”

Seto growled as he drew a card, examining it. Protector with Eyes of Blue. “Fine,” he said. Laundry Dragonmaid blew him a kiss. Once again, he was irked. Maiden with Eyes of Blue was never this unprofessional. It took him a moment to realize he was berating the behavior hologram of a trading card. Who programmed these Dragonmaid cards? Did they all act like this? He made a mental note to look into who programmed them and have them fired.

“By the way, I’m activating my continuous trap, Dragonmaid Downtime,” the Pharaoh remarked casually, as if asking what Seto planned on having for lunch. “With it, I can bounce your cards back to your hand by simply bouncing my own back to my hand. I’ll return Laundry Dragonmaid and  bounce your set card.”

It was then he was reminded of another thing kc_blimp said about most traps carrying floating graveyard effects, thus the desire to avoid actually destroying them. In the same message, kc_blimp also claimed that people should not expect to be able to activate traps on their turn. That it was apparently too slow of a strategy to work and Seto was starting to see why. His card returned to hand and he had no hope of activating it this turn.

“Fine,” Seto said again, noting that Protector’s effect might actually be useful… if he had another Light Tuner or a Blue Eyes White Dragon in his hand. It did, however, have more attack points than the Pharaoh’s Dragonmaid. “I’m summoning Protector with Eyes of Blue to the field!”

The Pharaoh raised a brow, a sly smirk on his face. “Nice card,” the Pharaoh teased. “I would think that your type would be a little more dragon and a little less knight, however.”

“Shut up,” Seto said reflexively, knowing that he shouldn’t attack because he didn’t know the full effects of either continuous card on the field. For all he knew, they could stop him from attacking directly. At the moment, Seto didn’t care. He was flustered and angry. “I’m attacking directly!” To his great surprise, Protector’s direct attack landed, dropping the Pharaoh from 8000 to 7200 life points. Seto gave a light ‘tch’. “Surprised you let me do that.”

Of course the Pharaoh hadn’t even flinched from the attack. He merely shrugged. “I thought I would even the playing field a bit.”

“Whatever you say, Pharaoh,” Seto huffed, unsure what the Pharaoh had planned next. This archetype was unfamiliar to Seto and he still was trying to figure out how the effects synergized without knowing the rest of the decklist. He needed to figure out the win condition of this deck. “I end my turn.”

“My turn, then.” The Pharaoh drew a card, a raised brow appearing on his face. “I’m afraid you’ve been playing right into my hands, Kaiba. I’m discarding Dragonmaid Ernus to activate her effect, allowing me to special summon Laundry Dragonmaid back to the field, leaving me a normal summon! Say hello to Nurse Dragonmaid!”

This time, a low level girl with dragon features in pink appeared, giggling and leaning over to whisper something to Laundry Dragonmaid. Both of them had 800 attack, meaning neither of them could destroy Protector with Eyes of Blue without destroying themselves. What was the Pharaoh playing at? Suddenly, Nurse Dragonmaid winked at Kaiba as Laundry Dragonmaid laughed. “I still have the upper hand,” Kaiba responded, clipped. “You’d have to crash one of your monsters to get my life points and that would reduce the other’s attack by 100.”

Both Dragonmaids looked offended by this statement of fact. “Looks can be deceiving, Kaiba,” the Pharaoh responded. “I’m entering my Battle Phase and that causes Laundry Dragonmaid’s effect to activate, special summoning Dragonmaid Nudyarl! Now Dragonmaid Downtime activates, bouncing Nurse Dragonmaid back to my hand and sending your set card back to your hand!”

Kaiba was surprised as he watched Laundry Dragonmaid transform before his eyes into the massive purple dragon, swirling in front with a snarl. Nurse Dragonmaid gave a cheek wave as she dissolved and Kaiba’s set card once again bounced back to his hand. So much for battle traps, Seto thought acidly. The dragon’s stats were good - a level seven with 2700 attack that could easily destroy his monster. “I see,” Seto said. It seemed that the girls themselves were not there for attack but instead to bring out these new monsters. “Clever.”

“Nudyar, attack Protector with Eyes of Blue,” the Pharaoh said. Instantly, Nudyar’s mouth opened, a stream of water washed away Protector and destroyed him. Kaiba gave a soft ‘tch’ as his life points drained down from 5400 to 3500. He was already calculating in his head what he would need to do to counter something like this. “That ends my turn.”

Kaiba drew and was semi grateful for what he grabbed. “I activate Cards of Consonance to discard the White Stone of Legend,” Kaiba said as he started thinking about the best way to handle what the Pharaoh had out. “That allows me to draw two. And because I discarded the White Stone of Legend, I can add a Blue Eyes White Dragon to my hand. Next, I summon Maiden with Eyes of Blue!”

Maiden appeared, flipping her long white hair over her shoulder and glaring down the massive dragon in front of her. As per usual, she was strictly professional. “You really like your Blue Eyes cards, don’t you,” the Pharaoh remarked, a raised brow. “Just like Priest Set did, actually.”

Seto’s blood went ice cold at the mention of Priest Set. He’d met some of the Priests when he’d journeyed to the afterlife and yet… he still felt a disconnect from the reality of the Pharaoh’s existence. It meant that magic was real. He pushed it aside again. “Whatever,” he responded as he set Call of the Haunted and Rage with Eyes of Blue. Perhaps he might stand a chance. “I set two cards and end my turn.”

“My turn! I resummon Nurse Dragonmaid. And now I activate Dragonmaid Welcome to add Parlor Dragonmaid to my hand. Next I’m discarding Dragonmaid Lorpar to negate Maiden,” the Pharaoh remarked and instantly Seto internally swore.

“You targeted Maiden,” Seto said, well aware that Rage with Eyes of Blue cannot activate now. “Her effect activates, summoning Blue Eyes White Dragon to the field.”

The familiar look of the white glow filled the field from Maiden and Blue Eyes White Dragon came out onto the field, snarling at the Pharaoh. “Ah,” the Pharaoh remarked, a raised brow. “In that case, I’m entering the battle phase, activating Nurse Dragonmaid’s effect to special summon Dragonmaid Enrus! And now I discard Dragonmaid Tinkhec to boost Ernus!”

Dragonmaid Ernus was a dragon of a similar shape to Dragonmaid Nudyarl and unfortunately, when boosted, she now had 4800 attack - more than enough to end the duel. At least now he understood the win condition of the Dragonmaid archetype. Seto closed his eyes, and whispered, “Of course.”

“Enrus attacks Blue Eyes White Dragon,” the Pharaoh said and Seto refused to watch as his Blue Eyes White Dragon was destroyed. Even if he activated Call of the Haunted, it wouldn’t matter. Maiden had 0 attack points and her effect was a hard once per a turn. The effect had been used up and now she was defenseless. Seto had no way of redirecting the attack. “And now Nudyral destroys Maiden!”

“End program,” Seto said quietly as his life points hit 0. When he opened his eyes, he was standing in an empty room and left with only thoughts of how to best rearrange his deck. Focusing on that helped as he turned and walked out.

#rivalshipping #rivalshipping fanfiction #dm rivalshipping #duel monsters rivalshipping #dm rivalshipping fanfiction #myfanfic #fic: you'd come back to me

[windsweptlassie]

On Love

So as you know I made this uquiz with an open-ended question at the end, tell me something about love, and I’ve gotten the most wonderful responses! They range from descriptions of wonderful partners: 

Lauren: oh, how long I went without being myself until I met him and he showed me who I truly was and that my worth was higher than I ever thought was possible

Levi: I love who we are with each other. I love who I am with you. In your company I am me. In your company I am the best of me. The best with the best, I've told you. I wouldn't give you up for anything

Daniel: i fell in love for the first time when i was 17... at the time, i didn’t realize it was the first time, i thought i’d been in love before, a couple times actually, but falling in love at 17 was such a fulfilling experience, it felt so forceful yet so right. it’s when i first truly understood what love was. never before had i felt so understood and so cared for as i did when i was in love with her, and she was in love with me. it’s been nearly 4 years since then, and nearly 3 years since we broke up and stopped talking, and still, i think about her almost every day. i’ve never known anyone like her; to me, she was love itself.

El: oh i’m in love with everyone that i know op!!! especially my girlfriend, of course ,but also my friends and my family and random people on the street and uh

Grace: i’ve met my soulmate and we plan on getting an apartment and marrying after college

A: I’m going to ask the woman I love to marry me and I just wanted to tell someone because I am so excited

Jeremy: you ever have that feeling where basically after years of denying that someone couldnt understand you in a way or love you and then the next thing you know you happen to find that person and its just great from then on out? idk how to explain it anyways I love my boyfriend so much he means the world to me

Lucy: i am so happy i have found the one i love

to descriptions of best friends and favorite people:

Nightbyrd: Love is a hug from an alzheimer's patient who hasn't the foggiest idea who you are, but they know you're worth hugging.

H: I have been doing so much yoga with my roommate recently!! It's a great way to center my mind for an hour

Riv: [platonic] i’ve literally never met anyone who understands me in the way that my best friends do. they’re literally the best people in the whole world and i genuinely don’t know what i’d do without them. i love them with my whole heart

Cillian: when i talk about how much i love my best friend i get so teary eyed because i cant believe that such a genuinely wonderful person wants to speak to me every day - i care for her more than anyone else on this planet

O: my two besties are my sources of happiness and they’re so pretty i would die for them :D

to beautiful quotes:

Kai: "you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." DARCYYYY PLS MY HEART CANT HANDLW THIS PAIN

Dorian: When the plane went down in San Francisco, I thought of my friend M. He’s obsessed with plane crashes. He memorizes the wrecked metal details, ____the clear cool skies cut by black scars of smoke. Once, while driving, he told me about all the crashes: The one in blue Kentucky, in yellow Iowa. How people go on, and how people don’t. It was almost a year before I learned that his brother was a pilot. I can’t help it, I love the way men love. (accident report in the tall, tall weeds- ada limon, bright dead things)

Adam: every day I think about lemony snicket I will love you if I never see you again I will love you if I see you every Tuesday or however it goes. and it KILLS ME. love only fits in small things

Hero: “Your heart beats in my ribs and mine in yours, and both in God’s… The divine magnet is in you, and my magnet responds.” - Herman Melville to Nathaniel Hawthorne

Mary: "Love is watching someone die."

Alex: "meet me at blue diner, i'll take coffee and talk about nothing baby"

Sparrow: "How dare you love me like you've never known fear?" and "For you, the world," and "Darling, I was born to press my head between your shoulder blades," and "Will you start where I end?"

V: " You want to die for love. You always have. " and "someone will remember us, I say, even in another time" are living rent free in my mind 24/7 and I'm shaking. When will I finally be not the only one falling ?

Sahar K: To love another person is to see the face of god!!!

Miriam: all the love in the world is useless when there is total lack of understanding- kafka

Juls: Don’t you think they are maybe the same? Love and attention

to practices of love:

Leo; i love feeling happy bc somebody that i love is happy and comfortable....like its not about me i just love seeing you smile. we are safe together...idk i just feel it bro

A: I like to think love is leaning on each other during the light or dark days. Its a personal mission of mine to find out who I am and what I want. Yet I never seem to find my place in this world and as I look and look , I realise the only place I can be myself even with or without the efforts to find myself was done on that day or not, I am always tired so shall I lean on you? And you can lean on me as well. I shall be your fig tree and you shall be my favourite willow tree.

L: It's too late at night to be soul searching, but it's a journey we all seem to find ourselves on these days.

Anthi: feeling safe and at home, I guess (also I love frogs)

Julia: ive found that loving someone is like becoming your own thesaurus. you have to find or come up with infinite ways to say, you’re beautiful, or, i love you. it’s a gift

Galexies: ive been writing letters to the person i'd love one day since i was 14. i write them in a little journal usually, but i've been digitizing them into emails and sending them to one account that i'll give to them someday. i'd like to put pictures, but i haven't been outside much recently so theres that. i wonder if they'd like the sunsets i have on file, or if they'd find my cat cute in a bowtie.

Caeles: Love is sharing fruit slices and making someone tea at random

Dundy: Love is sending your friends cursed shit and watching them react in horror

to crushes and potential loves: 

Jess: I have a crush on my roommate. It sucks, but it's also wonderful. I get to be around him all the time when we're at school. we share a life together; it's rather domestic. I think a lot about marrying him and being domestic with him forever. It won't happen, and I'll move on eventually, but I'll be happy with him for as long as I can. I hope you feel loved tonight, because you are. Sleep well.

Aki: I so desperately want to believe that love is fake because I’ve seen what happens when loved ones leave but whenever I start to convince myself that I’ll never love anyone my best friend messages me telling me she loves me. She’s the only person I’ve ever pictured having a future with but love scares me and I don’t really know what to do but I think as long as she’s with me in some way, I’ll be fine

Hi: her her i keep thinking abt her.... gonna see her in 8 days or so i really miss her. its ok if shes never gonna love me like i want her to really being her friend spending time with her makes me the happiest girl on earth.... outsold antidepressants

Kit: this guy i have a crush on has hypnotically dark brown eyes and he's wonderful and shows me kindness like no one else

Juno: my crush has all the stars in his eyes

Mads: When I have the courage to meet my eyes with hers, the world stands still

Be Nice To Me: Look bro I never do these but I am yearning to hold them SO badly right now and someone needs to know it besides me

to the trials of love: 

Pppppp: I just wanna love like from the movies and what I read about.. but everyone tells me that that’s fictional and rare to find in the real world and it sucks bc it seems like all the guys I’ve met are terrible and the norms of society are all about not respecting women and uthdjdjdk

Manny: I have been in love before and I will be again but I’m not now and I miss it

Ok: I don't think I've ever been in love, though I love many people. I am waiting for the day I look at someone and can say, YES. IT'S YOU.

Chloe: idk rn i'm like okay with my love and i'm happy so we'll see i'm just a little cautious rn bc my last partner told me i didn't know how to love

L: love is so fucking complicated I don't even know where to start

Corrin: He’s not real and it worried me that I will never allow myself to live or be loved because I will always be waiting for him

Sean: Good luck it dont exist

Serena: i want 2 b in love :(( </3

13: I don’t know anymore

M: I just really don’t like dealing with it lol

to beloved characters: 

Janaya: I’m madly in love with my comfort and kin character and I hope maybe in the afterlife I can relive a life with him in some sort of dimension

Jhgjdf: when i was a kid i had a crush on ash ketchum from pokemon and id always daydream about being a female pkmn trainer and meeting him and we fall in love

to advice and prose: 

Mikolai: Love is earth, gentle and soft at first flight but upon being broken, drowns you in the dry choking wastes of its consequences...

Thex: Your hands will not go cold without someone to hold them. I am here. I will be here.

Kat: it is the nearest proof to god that i find myself surrounded by people who love in a way that complements so wonderfully the way i love

H: believe in love out of spite believe in love to prove everyone wrong believe in love because you were told not to and we will not do what we’re told anymore believe in love because it’s the strongest act of teenage rebellion we have left believe in love because it’s easier not to and when is easy worth doing? believe in love because everything says otherwise but you are untouchable, you are your own, you are not made by their design believe in love because, perhaps, you are love

Ali: I used to want a kind of love that feels like coming home and now I want nothing more than to be away from home on many different adventures

Em: you dont need to love yourself to accept it from others

to the small, the simple, and the sweet:

Ireal: Poems

O: Flowers

Fay: ah im sorry that i’m feeling unmotivated but you are very kind.

Ad: we love LOVE

A: <3

Isak: small things

H: intense

Hey: Listening to a clock ticking away

S: her

E: <3

Hania: Amorous, I adore that word ^^

Catboy: wholesome

J: i love love so much it hurts

Emmy: hi i love the song darkest of discos!! try and give it a listen!! <3

Nora: Love is painful, but most of the time love is great

Ariel: i like the comfort it can bring

M: i love love

to food!

Cool Whip: Matzoh ball soup!!

Woop: I love sausages.... I hope that's ok with you?

and animals too <3

Nee: hmm i have pet geckos and i love them very much!

96: raccoons ????

DJ Big Penis: cats

:3: I Love frogs,,, love is stored in the frog,,,

I hope that this serves as a sweet compilation of what love means! Love to all of you, it warms my heart so much to hear about your people and your geckos and your characters and soup and all the songs and quotes you love. <3 Strength to all of you who are figuring out to do about your feelings for your crush, and congratulations to you who are proposing or moving in with your person! Your words are a source of light to me, truly.

#on love #love files #uquiz #mine #shut up queenie #long post

[phantomnostalgist]

Ethan Freeman Phantom interview

An interview with Ethan Freeman from about 1994 or 1995, printed in “Beneath the Mask” #8 (which I haven’t found my print copy of yet, but the interview was reproduced on our old POTO fan site). 

Also of note about Ethan: at the time he was one of the two youngest actors to have played the Phantom - he and Anthony Warlow were both 28 or 29 when first cast in the role.

Are there any differences between London and Vienna - if so, what are they? The general tone of the production in Vienna was slightly more Operetta-like, probably due to the language, the sound of the translation and style of acting of some of the players. The tempo was also at some points quite different depending on who was conducting, and would undoubtedly feel strange to me now. The audience tended to be less tuned in to the humorous moments in the show in general, and some scenes like "Managers I & II" for example, simply run better and are more clever in English.

How did you get the role? I got the role of the Phantom after auditioning for Hal Prince and Gillian Lynne and the Viennese producer and musical staff. They appeared very excited about the audition. I'd sung "Music of the Night" which they praised in a friendly manner (Hal is always positive and encouraging), and they sent me off to learn the segment from the Final Lair "Order your fine horses... This is the choice. This is the point of no return!" When I came back the next day to do it (the Phantom candidates appeared by then to have been reduced to three) Hal said "OK Ethan I want you to scare me!" So I did the section with as much power and venom as I could muster (Id never seen the show - I think Id heard the record once or twice...) and after it was done, Hal just said "Great. You scared me!" and that was that really. Later that day they explained to Alexander Goebel and me what they would like and would we be willing to share, obviously with Alex, who was very well known, being the dominant of the two. So we split 5/2 which frequently ended up being 4/3 as the run went along.

How did you research the character? I read the novel finally, all the way through. Ruth Hale, my partner in "Cats" at the time, later to premiere as Mme Giry in the Hamburg production, gave me a copy as a present. I'd seen several of the films over the years so I knew there wasn't much to be mined from those - although Lon Chaney Snr did display some magnificent body language, and I've nicked at least one dramatic gesture from him. Principally though, I had several long meetings with Hal in New York to talk about the role and show. He instructed me to go watch Michael a few times then come back and talk some more. Crawford was magnificent, at the peak of his vocal power and still fairly fresh in the role and I was moved and impressed as I have not been since by a Phantom. (Though Dave Willetts, I must say, also made a huge impression the first time I saw him, for his power and well-delineated psychotic behaviour.) At first I thought boy, you've got your work cut out for you on all fronts. So, I would say my "research" of the role was principally based on my own discussions with Hal and also largely on my own thoughts and feelings. Obviously most of the physical manifestations of the role, make-up, costume, blocking, etc were predetermined so there wasn't much scope for change. To be honest, I feel some of the Phantoms I've seen tend, in an effort to be different, to stray from the basic line of the drama and weaken themselves as a result. Michael's acting was extreme, yet very clear and economical at the same time, and I also try to offer the audience a complicated and ambiguous character going through clear, unambiguous moments of his life - otherwise it's so easy for the audience not to "get" everything that's there - or to "get" things that aren't intended to be there at all.

How do you feel on stage? So varied in thought and feeling that I can't really give a concise answer. I feel quite differently now to how I felt 600 odd shows ago. I used to have to concentrate on staying concentrated - now it just happens. I know what to achieve and just try to let it happen. I'd say I'm both in and out of Erik at the same time and he in me.

Do you think it's based on a true story ie. did the Phantom exist? I doubt it - I haven't read this newer novel "Phantom" yet and don't intend to until I finish playing the part. However I've been to the Palais Garnier and in all senses of the word it is a 'phantastic' theatre, one which easily conjures up many stirring images - beautifully represented in the Phantom designs, I'd say!

What do you think of Erik? I wish he'd let me have a little more time to myself! Oh, I don't know. He's a sad, bitter, brilliant man. He has a great brain and can be a real bastard. I find him easy to understand - he's motivated by a terrible profound loneliness and has been forced to create his own universe which has its own laws. Anyone who has known some kind of loneliness or feeling of apartness when they were children or growing up can tune in to this crucial aspect of the Man, which is his great mythical attraction. He is so powerful, awesome, in control and yet so hurt and vulnerable. He must epitomise great beauty and great ugliness at war with each other, reason and insanity, God/Satan, Id/Ego battling it out. In the end, he learns about sacrifice, shows mercy and is redeemed by love - a great, archetypal Romantic drama - another reason why the story has always been so popular. I can't stand it when I see Erik played as a "nutter". Yes, he goes "crazy" a few times, but in general he is not insane in the pathological sense. I feel if he is played as a schizophrenic or a psychopath, the romantic ideal of the story is dashed, because both of those conditions would indicate a "determination" that makes any hope of redemption impossible, and would break with the "Romantic" style. He is very melancholy, angry, egocentric, neurotic perhaps, and goes off into rages of frustrated sexuality, but he is not insane. And I'll kill anyone who thinks otherwise!

What do you think happens to him at the end? That's our little secret! I think the different fan magazines have probably spent pages on that so I don't see I need to contribute. He goes!

Why do you think the show is so appealing? Some lovely songs, great orchestrations, a nice mixture of melodrama and light comedy, some stunning sets and a lot of good theatrical magic: and on the thematic side, many of the things I've mentioned before, which I suppose you could define as the archetypal Beauty and the Beast scenario which, if honestly portrayed, can tug the heartstrings of even the most urbane Japanese businessman.

What is your favourite role of those you've played? Obviously Phantom is the supreme role in my repertoire to date. I did however, really enjoy my stints in other Lloyd Webber shows as well. Che in "Evita" was very cool to play and Gus/Growltiger, while exceedingly 'uncool' thanks to the heavy knitted costumes, was a joy to play, despite being totally knackering, and one that I was surely born to do. I really enjoyed doing Hajj, the Poet in "Kismet" with the BBC Radio 2 last year, working with the composers, and would love to have the chance to do that again on stage someday.

What role would you like to play? I'd quite hope to have a go at Sweeney Todd somewhere down the line and would still like to play the Celebrant in "Bernstein's Mass" at some point. (I've nearly done that a couple of times.) Add to that a heap of great operatic roles I'd love to do but probably never will and whatever new, unknown roles lie lurking up ahead. We'll wait and see!

End note from me - Ethan’s wrong about schizophrenia, but hey, this interview was 25 years ago and actors can’t be expected to be experts on mental illness. But I really love this interview, the depth he goes into, and how his sense of humour comes through too.

#the phantom of the opera #phantom of the opera #ethan freeman #classic phantoms #poto #poto legends #phantom legends