#sarah translates things sometimes
Text
intimidated
pairing: jj maybank x kook!reader
word count: 5.3k
summary: you’re there for jj when it matters most. (inspired by this post)
warning(s): sprinkles of angst, but fluffy in the end.
a/n: the song i had in mind while writing this was intimidated by kaytranada & h.e.r <3
jj maybank masterlist
© goldenroutledge || do not plagiarize, repost, or translate my work in any way
JJ Maybank didn’t need handouts. As he told it, his independence was his most valuable asset. It’s what made him a pogue through and through. “Is freedom anything else than the right to live as we wish?”— An Epictetus quote JJ scribbled down, bored as ever in his freshman English class. His life motto condensed into twelve simple words, whether his newfound ‘freedom’ was out of his control or not. Either way, he played the cards he was dealt.
His friends— no, scratch that— his family, were his escape to comfort. A soft, pillowy landing from the nose dive that was his life. A foreign concept to him until he met John B, then Pope, then Kiara, then you. A refuge of safety, ironically enough, given the many times you all had looked death in the face.
Even though the pogues had already started wearing matching friendship bracelets that Kiara made by the time you came along, it was a smooth transition when you were welcomed into the group with open arms. By some more than others at first, given your kook status. But just as they’d embraced Kie, your initiation into the group was no different.
While it took time for JJ in particular to come around, his reservations were understandable. At first, you gave him his space and he gave you yours. Always letting him set the tone and lead the way.
As time went on, JJ soon decided he wouldn’t mind having you around him all the time, there was no going back. JJ loved to the point of no return, and it was incomparable to anything— or how anyone else could ever make you feel.
At times, he felt like that was all he had to offer. Nothing but fierce loyalty and protection over the ones he loves most. But you. To JJ, you were the fine line between hideaway and heaven itself. Even if he thought he may not end up there, he was sure that it would be you he’d meet at heaven’s gates.
Amongst any conflict or tension within the group, you always provided a safe haven for him to retreat to, though he had difficulty admitting it. In a way you had a solution for everything. Keeping tensions low and spirits high in the process. You were the original peacemaker of the group, before his precious gun came along.
Right now, it was almost all he could think about while he sat there, beer in hand, listening to John B and Sarah argue in the distance. How he wishes you were here, to ease his nerves and settle the anxiety simmering in his chest.
JJ hated this. He hated that nobody seemed to get along anymore. With all that was going on with the others, he wouldn’t even think to mention his problems. The looming eviction notice on his house, one of few things he had left on this island. While everyone’s lives continued to progress, JJ’s was at a standstill. No job, no parents, and now his friend group was falling apart at the seams. And with everyone else occupied these days, he was alone.
JJ, selfless as usual, would hate to bother you, no matter how badly he wanted to. He knew you’d have some inspirational shit to say to him. Though he’d poked fun at it sometimes, he’d never needed anything more right now.
The sound of footsteps came before JJ saw them, watching Sarah storm off and away from John B as he stood there, tense and silent.
JJ could be hot headed at times, that was no secret. He could understand his friends' quarrels to an extent. But he couldn’t look past the fact that you all were supposed to be sticking together, especially right now. When he said that nothing good could happen once you all returned to Kildare, he knew he was right. Call it a gut feeling.
-
Naturally, Sarah told you everything. Confidant, mom-friend, advisor— all titles bestowed upon you by your close group of friends over the years. You’d always tried to be as neutral as possible in times of conflict. Though in matters of the heart it was nearly impossible.
Days after her fight with John B, she found herself laying on your bed, venting all of her bottled up frustrations about him and the state of their relationship.
“I’m a mess, Y/n. I feel like such a mess.”
You looked at her sympathetically, knowing there wasn’t much you could do. Just listen, just be there in her time of need.
“So, I took my bag from the Chateau and I left. Kie’s parents told me I couldn’t stay, then I went to JJ’s and he wasn’t home. He’s working at Guffy’s again last I heard.”
You briefly glanced up at the mention of JJ’s name— and it didn’t go unnoticed by Sarah. Instead of divulging about it, she continued her rant.
“Then I was just wandering around, because it’s not like I had anything better to do. And who sees me drinking at Tiki Bar? Topper.”
“Topper?”
“Topper.”
You internally cringed at the mention of the Thornton boy. He was always nice when you saw him, nothing bad nor good to say about him. But you knew deep down he was Sarah’s achilles heel. He reminded her of everything she once had, the person she once was. Lately, you couldn’t help but crave some normalcy too.
“So.. what happened?”
She sighs heavily, dropping her hand across her eyes. “We went to Mase.”
“Alone?”
“We went with some people from KDC. The old crew, Kelce, Phoebe…”
“Is that it?”
“We made out.”
Sarah squeezed her eyes shut in fear of your reaction, knowing it’d probably show on your face before anything.
“Oh.” You swallowed back any judgment you might’ve had, compartmentalizing your love for John B and choosing to hear Sarah out. “And how do you feel about it?”
“Awful. I mean Topper has been so good to me lately with everything going on, he’s always there to pick up the pieces and I just feel bad. It was a mistake.”
“It can’t happen again, y’know. Not if you want to work it out with John B.”
“I do, I wanna work it out with him.” She urged. “And then the next morning we had breakfast. Kie came into the restaurant and saw us together and I think she got the wrong message. She said she’s staying out of it but I can tell what she’s thinking.” Sarah takes a deep inhale, and a deep exhale to follow. “What do I do, Y/n?”
It still baffles you at times that you’ve become the voice of reason. You hope Sarah doesn’t notice that you feel uneasy about the whole thing. “Just… be honest. Don’t let John B find out from anyone other than you. He’s gonna be upset but he has a right to be.”
The blonde sits up, crawls over to you and envelopes you into her arms. “Don’t know what I’d do without you.”
-
Sun reflected brightly off the boats docked at the marina, the two smoothie cups in your hand sweating from the sweltering heat. Your family's boat was kept here at Guffy’s; particularly when your parents weren’t in town to cruise around the island and daydrink with their kook friends.
At least you had an alibi, just in case you happened to run into JJ. The two medium strawberry banana smoothies you carried might need some explanation, though.
Ever since you all had made it back to the island, JJ had been hard to track down. He was rarely in one place for too long. So where else better to catch him than at work?
“Y/n? How are you doing today?” Billy questions from a distance away, putting on his friendliest smile for the daughter of his best clients.
“Can’t complain. Happy to be back.”
“And it’s good to have you back. Everything alright with the boat?”
“Oh yeah, everything’s fine, I just realized I left behind my favorite sunglasses.” You explained, hoping your excuse sounded authentic enough.
“Alright. You take care, now.”
“Actually… I was wondering is JJ around?”
“Maybank? He was here a few days ago.”
“Hm, I could’ve sworn he was working today.”
Billy sighs, eyebrows furrowing. “Listen, Ms. Y/l/n, I know you want to advocate for your boyfriend and all but JJ can’t work here.”
Confusion spread through your features this time as you genuinely had no idea what the man was getting at. You chose to not correct him when he’d mistaken you for JJ’s girlfriend.
“Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good kid. I know he wants the job back but Guffy put a pin in it. I’m sorry. Really not much I can do.”
You forced a polite smile on your face as the dots connected, remembering the melting smoothie you held in your left hand while your half-finished one remained in your right. The two of you exchanged brief goodbyes before you quickly left the marina.
If JJ really hadn’t been working at Guffy’s again, where the hell was he? His act of disappearing was unmatched, but so was your skill of guessing.
If a game of hide-n-seek is what he wanted, a game of hide-n-seek is what he will get.
-
Grass brushed against your ankles as you approached JJ’s home, your steps careful as you looked around for him.
Going to JJ’s home was forbidden. When Luke was around, that is. He was a phantom— an ugly, dark presence looming over the quaint home that would otherwise feel serene. The chirping birds in the trees couldn’t tell the difference.
You haven't been here many times. The times you had been here weren’t anything you nor JJ wanted to remember. The feeling of uncertainty creeped into your mind from your past visits. You never knew what to expect.
To your left, there was a beautiful, never-ending view of the water past the grass of the Maybank’s yard. You hadn’t noticed that before. This spot had probably seen some beautiful sunsets. In a moment of imagination, you almost pictured sitting there with JJ on the plush green, hand in hand, watching the warm hues of the sky melt into a dark night.
The caution tape wrapping around the wood of the house caught your interest as you made your way onto the porch, also noticing the eviction letter left on the door, moving closer for a better look.
“Y/n?”
JJ called out, appearing from around the corner of his home, startling you out of concentration as you re-read the notice again and again.
As if you didn’t come over to finally see him in the first place. Though you couldn’t speak— for once unsure of what to say. ‘Sorry you’re getting evicted?’, it just didn’t sound right. Then again it might’ve been better than standing frozen and staring at him, silently, like you were doing.
“What are you doing here?”
“I- um…. I brought you a smoothie.”
You held out the cup, approaching him and handing it to him. He stood there dumbfounded, eyebrows furrowed. His lips eventually pursed into a smile as a way to say thank you. This wasn’t the relaxed JJ you were accustomed to; nonetheless he was still the JJ you loved.
“Why are you here?”
“I told you. The smoothie.”
“You came all the way out here from your mansion on Figure 8 to bring me a smoothie?”
“What?” You scoffed, his tone dictating where the conversation was headed. Most likely nowhere.
“Go back to reading by your pool or something. You shouldn’t be here.”
“I haven’t heard from you in days, JJ. I’m just checking up on you.”
“So what? You touring around the Cut now? Delivering smoothies to lost pogues? Is Heyward’s your next stop?”
He resumed tinkering with his bike, and from the looks of it he was working rather aggressively— desperate to distract himself from the conversation at hand.
“I miss my best friend. Am I not allowed to miss you anymore? I mean it’s not like we were stranded on an island together… not knowing whether we would live or die!”
“Well, we’re not exactly a big happy family right now. You should know that.”
“Yeah. John B and Sarah are on some kind of break. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see you, that doesn’t have anything to do with us. I thought we were past the whole picking sides thing.”
“I’ve been busy.” JJ shrugs.
“Busy working? At the job you lied about having?”
His eyes snapped to yours immediately. Your heart clenched as soon as the words left your mouth, you didn’t mean to go too far. But at least you had his attention.
“What, are you stalking me now? Or did you hire a P.I. to figure that out?”
“Hilarious, JJ. I was at the marina earlier to grab something off my boat. Actually hoping I would run into you but, whatever.”
“Yeah. Whatever.”
A few moments of awkward silence lingered between the two of you, as you kicked a pebble around with your foot.
“I know you don’t owe me anything… but you could’ve just told me.”
He paused his movements, thinking about how he was going to respond.
“Tell you what? That I prefer mixed berry over strawberry banana?” He jested, smiling to himself.
“I’m not talking about the smoothie, idiot.”
His eyes drifted over to his home, knowing exactly what you were thinking, just afraid to acknowledge it.
“My problems aren’t your problems, Y/n.”
“And I know that. I just wanna help you, however you’ll let me.”
“Well, you can help me by not helping me. I’ll figure it out. Always do.”
“All I’m saying is you don’t have to figure it out alone. I’m here.”
At that, he dropped his tools, running tense hands through his hair. “But you aren’t here! You don’t have to live like this and you should be glad that you don’t!”
He raised his voice at you, frustrated. JJ was never good at putting his feelings into words, especially when it came to actually expressing them.
He didn’t know how he could tell you about everything. The worst day he’s ever had, the lowest he’s ever been. He couldn’t see a way in which he could tell you all of it and carry on the same. You were always a constant in his life. He needed it to stay that way, by any means necessary.
“That doesn’t make sense, JJ. What’s the point of having anything nice if I can’t share it with the people I love?”
The both of you were taken aback at what your explanation implied. In actuality, it took all of your power not to say those three words to him outright. But you couldn’t, not like this.
“You don’t have to pretend to care that much. I’m sure you can find another community service project to focus on.”
“Community service?” You chuckled emptily, baffled at his ridiculousness, though deep down you knew this was how he dealt with things. He simply didn’t know anything other than defensiveness. “That’s what you think this is?”
JJ closed his eyes in exasperation, wishing this conversation away. He could hear it in your voice, your feelings were hurt. Maybe not as bad as when your 8th grade crush asked someone else to the Valentine’s dance— but even a little was too much.
“If you’re gonna reduce our decade of friendship to me doing charity work, I guess there’s no changing your mind. I’m just wasting my breath.”
The words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to apologize instantly, but now he wasn’t sure if his apologies were something you’d wanna hear at the moment. He wasn’t sure if you’d believe him.
For all the disingenuous apologies he’d accepted over the years, he’d hate to put you on the receiving end of one. Even if his heart truly was in the right place, JJ couldn’t muster up the courage to show it.
“You don’t have to antagonize me. Because everything you’re blaming me for, it isn’t my fault. Just like this isn’t your fault either.” You gestured to the eviction notice at his door.
“Yeah.” He mumbled. “You’re right.”
“Say what you want about me, but I just wanna know that you’re okay. And if it’s an apology you’re looking for, you’re not gonna get it. I’ll never apologize for that.”
He nodded, unsure of what else to say. All he could do was try to understand.
Realizing he had no further comments, you turned your back to leave.
“Will I see you at the Chateau tomorrow?” You asked over your shoulder, hope remaining in your voice despite the uneasiness that remained between you two.
“Don’t count on it.”
“Alright, well… bye.”
JJ waves, before muttering a monotone ‘thanks for the smoothie’ as he watches you go.
-
Since returning to the island, it was an unspoken thing that you all were to meet up at the Chateau at some point. And with all the new developments in your lives lately, these meetings were much needed.
Pope handed you a beer as he came into John B’s living room, opening one of his own as he sat down beside you.
John B and Sarah seemed to be laying low, but it was clear they were back together or had come to some sort of resolution.
Kiara was going on about how much shit her parents had been giving her lately. They’d been hovering— watching over their daughter’s every move from the moment she set foot on the island again.
Pope told the group about how Cleo had won over Heywar in record time, much faster than John B or JJ. Pope’s parents simply wanted the best for him, and knew that the danger and mischief his friends came with couldn’t be productive.
“We’ve been best friends for what…? 13 years?” John B recalls. “And your dad can hardly stand the sight of me but Cleo won him over in a few minutes? How?”
“Are you surprised?”
“Not at all.” John B holds his hands up in surrender to Cleo, Pope smirking beside her as he witnesses the interaction. “Just confused.”
“I have many superpowers, John.”
“Apparently! Winning over Heyward is like, unheard of in this group. At least for JJ and me.” John B explains, sipping his beer.
“Speaking of, where’s he at?”
At the shift in conversation, you can feel several pairs of eyes fall upon you. All you can do is act as normal as possible, tipping off any of your friends always ends badly in the case of keeping a secret. Until the cat’s out of the bag, your friends will make it their personal mission to reveal whatever it is you’re hiding.
You raised your eyebrows, pretending to only catch onto their stares moments later. “Why’re you looking at me?”
“No reason. It’s not like you guys are secretly together or anything.” Pope mutters under his breath, catching a glare from you at his false claim.
“We’re not. I wouldn’t know where he is.”
John B hisses, pretending to shiver. “Is it a little chilly in here? Or is that just Y/n’s cold shoulder?”
You roll your eyes, further proving his point until Sarah chimes in, pondering if she should speak up about what she knows.
“I actually stopped by JJ’s the other day. He.. wasn’t home.”
“Oh yeah, didn’t he go fishing? Probably not back yet.” John B remembers.
“I don’t think he’ll be going home anytime soon.”
At this your eyes meet Sarah’s hazel ones, full of hesitation. You shoot her a look of ‘whatever you’re about to say, don’t’, and you hope she is wise enough to pick up on it.
“Why is that?” Kiara questions, confused.
“He got evicted.” Sarah blurts, regret spreading through her expression as she sees you react; you don’t react. And that slightly terrifies her.
“Really?” Pope asks in disbelief, though not too surprised. More so disappointed that his best friend had to endure this, silently at that.
“Yeah. When was the last time anyone’s heard from him?”
The group silently recollects for a few moments, Kie pulls out her phone to review her latest texts with the man in question.
Instead, you’re wondering how the hell Sarah even knew about this to begin with. How long could she know about this and just stay silent? Forget not telling the group, how long could she keep this from you? How could she not help her friend who was clearly in need of support?
“How long have you known?”
Sarah appears confused, wondering where your line of questioning is coming from.
“I- uh. After John B and I fought I went there, remember Y/n? I was hoping I could stay but he wasn’t home. That’s when I saw the eviction notice.”
“And you waited, I don’t know, a week to bring that up?”
“Y/n, it’s not like I intentionally kept this from you, okay? We know how protective you are over JJ.”
Her words strike a cord within you, already on edge regarding JJ Maybank because of your argument with him the day prior. It was still a sore subject, even more so made by having no one to confide in about it.
“It’s not about that, Sarah. You didn’t even have to tell anyone at all but you didn’t think to maybe find out if he’s okay? At the very least?”
“I was a bit homeless at the time, Y/n, sorry about that.”
“Oh, right. You were too busy hooking up with Topper to care about the well-being of our best friend? Good to know the bare minimum is impossible for you.”
Sarah scoffs, John B shakes his head in exasperation. Kiara stays silent mostly, being no stranger to your and Sarah’s sister-like fights. She couldn’t even disagree with you, though with her parents keeping her on lockdown it was hard to do anything about it. She wasn’t in a place to have an opinion.
Pope and Cleo shared looks, communicating wordlessly as they had grown to do. Being away at Heyward’s kept them out of the loop quite a bit.
“JJ will figure it out, Y/n. Relax.” John B reassured. Though he was defending his girlfriend, now that they were in a ‘good place’ again, you felt anything but reassured at his carelessness around the subject. You’d think of all of you, John B would understand the most.
“Relax? Why should I relax if JJ is in trouble? If anything, you’re too relaxed!”
“I’m sorry you feel that way but you don’t have to take it out on Sarah, this isn’t even her fault! Not all of us want to fight your battles.”
“If you had any sense left you’d realize this isn’t about me. This is about our friend, who I thought we all cared about. At least enough to share this kind of news. We’re talking about his well-being here, I mean he’s losing the house he grew up in and nobody seems to care about that?”
“If he wanted us to know, he’d tell us.”
“Like he’s ever going to do that! You know better than anyway that he won’t!”
“It’s not my problem.”
“Mhm. It’s a shame JJ’s busy solving all of yours.”
“Y/n, please. Can we just have a chill night?”
“Aren’t you supposed to be his ‘best friend since the third grade?’ Because you don’t fucking act like it.” You huffed, standing up to get rid of your beer can. At this point you were rambling to yourself, more than okay with the group hearing what you really thought about them and their carelessness for the situation.
“Indeed. Which is why I don’t need to force him to tell me shit, okay?”
“Why are you such an asshole, John B?”
“Y/n, I just found my dad. So, excuse me if JJ’s living situation isn’t at the forefront of my mind.”
“I never said it had to be, but you’re acting like you don’t even care!”
“I do care! We all do!” John B shouts. “And maybe if you’d let up on him he’d actually come to you about this stuff!”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m saying, maybe JJ would give you the love you so desperately crave if you weren’t fucking suffocating him.”
“John B!” Kiara warns.
Sarah held her face in her hands, knowing John B had crossed the line. Maybe he had one too many beers in his system. Either way, hell was about to break loose. And when it came to JJ, hell hath no fury like you did.
Your head felt like it was about to explode. How could your friends seem to be so comfortable with this? The same friends that claimed to leave no pogue behind, to never turn their back on one of their own.
If that was true, then what was this? From the looks of it, nobody even pretended to give a damn.
“You’re fucking terrible, John B. This isn’t even about me at all! You just can’t stop deflecting from what a shitty friend you are. I mean, JJ would die for literally every last one of you guys. And he almost did! On multiple occasions! But instead you’re gonna neglect the one person who's seen you through all your bullshit and as soon as it’s over you’re gonna pretend like nothing happened? Like the Earth is back on its axis? The world doesn’t fucking revolve around you, John B. That’s just not- that’s not something you do to someone you love.”
There wasn’t a need to announce your departure, as it was so quiet inside that you could hear your own breathing.
As hard as it was to fight with John B like that, you couldn’t deny the weight that had been lifted off your chest. Your spirit was lighter. It was therapeutic, really. So therapeutic you felt peaceful enough to go home and take the longest nap ever recorded, maybe in John B’s own hammock just to prove a point.
Entranced in your own thoughts, you didn’t even register JJ resting in the hammock himself, hands intertwined behind his head. Not asleep, but wondering what your next words will be. The walls of the Chateau were thin enough, echoes of your voices amplified by the open windows.
He wasn’t sure if you simply didn’t notice his presence or if you were flat out ignoring him, walking past like he was invisible. Testing the waters, he called out from behind you.
“I never really thanked you for the smoothie.”
You froze in your tracks, face heating up and muscles tensing at the thought of the argument he probably just heard and decided not to barge in on.
“It’s alright. Wasn’t looking for praise.”
JJ met you halfway, taking note of your tired eyes and your feet dragging against the grass.
“So, what? You’re picking fights for me now?”
“You heard?”
“I think Ward Cameron heard. All the way from Guadalupe.”
“Stop it.” You warned, cracking a smile for a split second. JJ was good at that. Making you smile no matter the circumstances. “I stand up against injustice. That’s all.”
“Then are you still mad at me?”
“About what?”
“Yesterday. The whole… note on door situation.”
“Could never be mad at you, JJ. Especially not about that.”
He softly smiles, one that you return. It’s been a long time since you’d shared a small moment like this. Too long.
He gestures for you to come closer and slide into his arms as he’d held them out for you, just like you belong there.
“I am sorry, though.” JJ mumbles the words softly, almost into the crook of your neck as if he was speaking to you and you only. “I know you’re just trying to stick around for me.”
“Yeah. Just trying to be wherever you are.”
“You don’t have to fight for me, y’know.” I’m already here. Though you may not have caught on instantly, nothing he’s ever said has made as much sense.
“Sorry, J. Sometimes I just feel like we don’t deserve you. Like I don’t deserve you.” You admitted sheepishly.
JJ scoffs, and you’re not sure why. He’s often sarcastic, but it’s hard to tell what he’s really thinking in these situations.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Y/n?”
Your eyes meet his, hesitation behind them.
“You’re the one who doesn’t deserve me? Is that a joke?”
You looked at him as if it were obvious, like the line had already been drawn in the sand. This fact had already been decided; there was no going back, not now, and not ever.
“I know I’m not the smartest person, okay, but you’re making no sense.”
“Come again?” You asked, equally as confused as he was. It was incredulous for anyone to believe JJ of all people wasn’t worth it— as if he wasn’t worth someone who would go to the ends of the Earth for him, someone who would defend him six ways to Sunday. There was no one in your life more deserving of such a thing.
“Listen, Y/n...”
“No! You listen. Nobody should treat you like that. Especially our friends! As if their problems are bigger than yours or something. It’s just fucked up for any one of them to act like they don’t care because I know deep down, they do. They care just like I do but they just suck at showing it. Mostly John B. He sucks the most. And I’m not exempt either, I mean I should’ve checked on you sooner-”
“Shoulda, woulda, coulda.” JJ interrupted, placing his hands on your shoulders. “Y/n, it’s okay. I don’t need anything.”
“I know that. I just want to love you. Because I really do. I really love you, JJ. Like bad. So bad that it’s probably sad at this point but I really don’t care anymore! Not about what John B has to say, not about anything, because I’ll never regret it. I’ll never wish that I didn’t love you.”
That stupid weight again, feeling as if it’s taking off like a rocketship and leaving your conscience for good. It makes you want to scream the words from the rooftops. Over and over and over again.
Confessing feels good, but kissing JJ feels damn euphoric. His lips are on yours before you can even register what’s happening, too busy being self-aware to realize the way his eyes turned glossy, or the way he’s gently got one hand on your waist and one hand caressing your cheek.
“He’s got it all wrong. I love you, too.” JJ confesses after pulling away from you, briefly taking his eyes off yours to glance at the Chateau. His head shakes as he says it, that starry glint in his eyes so undeniably present. “So bad.”
He earns a giggle out of you as he mocked your words to him just a few moments ago. But now, things were changing. He couldn’t stand before you and pretend he didn’t feel the way he did. Not anymore, not ever again.
Not after you’d shown your love for him so confidently to everybody, time and time again. JJ Maybank wasn’t sure about many things in life, but you weren’t one of them. This was surely the best decision he’d made in years.
“Come over.” You whine between kisses, breaking him out of his trance. If you let him, he’d kiss you forever, and it still wouldn’t be enough.
JJ raises his eyebrows, smirking.
“For dinner. We’re having sloppy joes.”
JJ, unresisting temptation, leans in again and moans against your lips dramatically. “What about dessert?”
You give his hair a tug and kiss the smirk off his face, whispering to him a secret.
“And maybe dessert.”
taglist: @ilovejjmaybank @missevi @nxsmss @cameronsrafe @msgorillagripcoochie @bibliophilewednesday @tovvaa @rudybarnes @annab-nana @reawritesthings @moniamaybank @outerbankspreferences @laneylaneylaney @jjpouggues @pogueslandia @mildkleptomaniac @whcclxr @mrs-cameron @it-was-never-meant-to-be-boys @alanniys @amourology @luversgirl + jj maybank taglist: @destourtereaux
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rafe cameron as your boyfriend.
pairings: rafe cameron x fem!kook!reader.
warnings: nsfw under the cut and inappropriate language used.
author’s notes: let’s all just think this is fanon rafe lmaooo also him and the pogues are coming back to me soon!!! do not copy, post on another site, translate or claim any of my works as your own or you will be reported! nav.
in the relationship
• he is completely obsessed with you
• literally shows you off to everyone!!!!
• calls you “princess” “baby” and “pretty girl” any chance he could get
• spoils you ROTTEN
• like he loves spoiling you, especially when it comes to buying you new sets of bikinis that he would love to see on you every time you two go for a swim at the beach. sometimes you might think he is doing it too much, but he would buy you absolutely anything you want
• he always gets teased by his friends for being too pussy whipped for you
• he doesn’t denies it. at all.
• topper would retort, “wow, you call me pussy whipped for sarah while you're practically wrapped around y/n’s pretty finger.”
• but rafe’s friends absolutely adore you to the extent that they ask him whether you'll be coming with them at every party they go
• “alright, back off my girl, bro.” he would scowl furiously at topper whenever the boy gives you a lengthy hug in greeting
• always has a hand around your waist
• or he would constantly pull you into his lap while drinking at a party, his arms encircling your waist
• neck kisses!!!!! lots of it
• holds your heels after coming back from a party
nsfw
• buys you an expensive necklace and makes you wear it while completely bare other than the necklace while fucking you
• a quickie in the bathroom at a party especially after seeing you dance seductively across the room with your own friends, rafe cannot control himself and he has to have you right here and now
• “let’s be quick baby, i just need you right now.”
• fucks you with his fingers roughly while attacking your neck with hot kisses
• he is in control !!!!
• either praises you or degrades you
• you would moan in pleasure either way, he was just too fucking good at this
• eating you out is probably his second favorite thing to do, after spoiling you of course
• he was harsh, but you loved it anyway with his hands on either inside of your thighs, prodding your legs to open wider as his tongue would be devouring your pussy and teeth skimming over your cunt as you would grip his hair and cry out
• “so fucking beautiful. you’re my pretty girl, you got that?”
• he literally gets possessive and will remind you during sex that he is the only one who can make you feel this way
• “mine,” he would mutter with each thrust
#♡ — ani’s works.#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x fem!reader#outer banks#outer banks x reader#outer banks smut#rafe cameron headcanons#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fic#outer banks headcanons#outer banks x you#outer banks x y/n#outer banks x fem!reader#rafe cameron
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I'll never write it so gonna post the abandoned idea for it here (also as a reminder, all my fic ideas are for grabs unless stated otherwise so if someone wants to pick it up, be my guest)
Red strings of fate/Soulmates AU
You are connected to your soulmate by a red thread only you and your soulmate can see and touch (and cut). When your soulmate dies, the thread solidifies and becomes heavier, as long as the distance between the soulmates was the time one of them died — almost like a chain.
Jake and Bradley find out they're soulmates early on in flight school — it's hard not to when the thread pulls tauter and tauter until they finally meet in the same classroom and they can see the other end of the thread for the first time.
There's fascination, there's the thrill of sneaking around (they should disclaim it, as soon as they learn, so it can be put in their records, but they never do) and everything is new and bright. They start to treasure the string, turning around their fingers and finding joy in noticing the other end twitching and pulling — with time, they notice the motions translate over the tread no matter how far away they are.
They make up a system of pulls and tags, using Morse code and it becomes something else, they become something else — in the air, wordlessly in sync, on the ground, talking to each other whenever they want, during sleepless nights and separate schedules and long-distance deployments.
Until.
Things start getting complicated. Bradley has commitment and abandonment issues, Jake's an all-or-nothing type of guy and just being soulmates isn't enough.
They go their separate ways. Bradley still, sometimes, when he can't sleep and the night makes him feel like nothing has a sense or a purpose, sends little messages down the thread. He never gets replies.
The day they meet again at the Hard Deck, Jake suspects Bradley is coming for the same assignment. The string’s been getting lighter and lighter the whole night, dropping down, no longer stretched to its limit.
They try to ignore the string the whole time the training goes on, but Mav still suspects. He doesn't say anything, but he feels like history is repeating itself.
When Mav and Bradley are arguing in the debriefing room and Warlock comes in, he doesn't say anything but Mav looks down at his own wrist and his face turns white and Bradley knows at that moment.
(Whether Mav and Ice are soulmates and married or they are soulmates but Ice still married Sarah, that's up for discussion).
During the whole funeral, Mav rolls the invisible thread around his wrist, moving onto his arm when it's not enough.
It's at that moment — Bradley decides Jake will never have to do the same.
The minute he turns around for Mav, he makes up a plan in his head.
They find each other in the snow, and argue, but by the end of it, Mav is making up a crazy plan and they'll try to return in one piece. Try being the keyword.
He pulls on the string, the thread between his thumb and index finger.
Mav frowns. "What are you doing?"
"Sending a message before we go."
He repeats it, just in case Jake hasn't realized in time to catch the whole thing at first. And then he starts looking through the pockets of his life vest.
“He’s not walking around with a dead man’s chain, Mav.”
Mav tries to stop him the second he realizes what Bradley is going to do but it's too late — with the same knife he cut his parachute off, he cuts off the thread, close to his wrist, letting it fall limping into the snow, red almost looking like droplets of blood.
It takes Jake a minute to realize that the tagging is a physical feeling, not just wishful thinking formed by his imagination.
The carrier deck is a mess, the foxtrot teams returned, Phoenix is now arguing with the admirals about Rooster's position — he might not be dead, sir — and the ringing in Jake's ears doesn't stop until he looks down at his wrist, and sees the string moving, the pulling a rhythmic, well-known motion.
Aloud, breaking up the vivid discussion about Maverick and Rooster's status, he says, “Rooster is alive, he’s—he’s talking,” and it almost feels like it's someone else using his voice.
“What do you mean, Hangman? His comm is silent.”
“Can feel it on the string, it’s still red and he’s— he’s tugging in Morse code,” he says. He closes his eyes and lets himself be pulled by the wrist. “S-O-R-R—Sorry, he’s—sorry and—and—I-L—Shit, no.”
I-L-Y
The string flops down, loose. “No—”
He cut it. He cut it because it's still red and not gray but still too limp and he knows it. His wrist feels too light, too free.
When Bradley lands on the carrier, his wrist is bare and the thread pools around Jake's feet. It doesn't magically reconnect when they touch, when they shake hands.
Jake tries to desperately find the other end, carrying rolls and piles of it with him as he follows Bradley to the med bay.
“Jake, just—just cut it,” he tells him. “It’s going to connect you again in a day or two.”
Jake ignores him, pulling miles and miles of the thread into circled piles next to Bradley's bed. He can't see the floor — it's just red and red and nothing else.
“No,” is all Jake says. “Not to you.”
It'll find him a new match, connect the thread to someone else, to someone who isn't Bradley.
"Bring me some scissors," Bradley says. He almost feels bad, when Jake's gaze turns up to him, glaring with shiny eyes. "Just do as I say for once."
Wordlessly, looking like it pains him, Jake brings him disposable scissors.
Bradley grabs his hand before he can move away, pulls about three feet of the thread from the pile, and cuts off the excess on the floor.
He wraps it around his own wrist, the string thin and soft, and a little clumsily ties it into a loop over his arm. When he leans away again, the thread takes a second, taut, and then stretches with the distance, like it has always done.
Jake stares at it, too focused and too absent. "That's the shittiest knot I've ever seen."
Bradley huffs. "Well, you gotta learn to live with it."
#can you tell i used to specialize in soulmates au fanfics#the ideas are endless#tgm#hangster#icemav mention#weirdly enough it was inspired by both me and my partner knowing morse code (kinda) and tinkering with the idea f buying bondtouch bracelet#you know the ones where the other person can feel when you tap yours
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I'm a big fan of localisation. I believe the goal of a translation should be to keep as much meaning and nuance as possible from the original. Localisation is key to this. Language and culture are inextricably linked, which means you must engage in cultural education and/or localisation to successfully translate. Cultural education is preferable, but in many cases it is not appropriate (not great having to pause every few seconds to read a translator note when you want to turn your brain off and watch a show). However, I think sometimes, translators take the wrong approach to localisation, and I want to talk about that here.
There was an example of "bad" localisation given by a twitter user in this Sarah Moon video: the example was anime characters subbed to use zoomer slang like "sus" and "cringe". I actually think that is an example of good localisation. I am not talking about that kind of thing.
This scene from 深夜食堂 (Midnight Diner) made me want to write this post. パチンコ has been translated as "pinball". I'm sure there are people reading that translation and cringing, just like I did! I tried to put my finger on what irked me so much about it and I realised: this localisation is localising the wrong part of the meaning of パチンコ.
Part of localising is choosing the closest cultural equivalent of a concept. This inevitably means losing some of the specific details of the original word, but usually those details aren't important (if the whole cultural concept is important, you should probably just use a translator's note IMO). For example, the word パチンコ has lots of bits of meaning in it: "gambling" "played on a machine", "time killer", "uses small metal balls", "generally played by older men", "big flashy lights", "money sink", and so on. In this context, the character is talking about "winning money" from パチンコ, so you'd expect at the very least that the localised word would preserve the "gambling" and "money sink" bits of meaning. However, instead they chose to preserve the "small metal balls" and "big flashy lights" bits of meaning (まさかの！). This is a very silly choice because those bits of meaning don't have a shred of relevance to this scene, or any other scene in this story at all. I can see a context in which "pinball" is the best possible localisation for パチンコ. But this was not it, and not even close. I've never heard of anyone winning money from pinball.
I think if I were a translator, my process for localisation would be to break down the word into those bits of meaning, then rank the bits of meaning in terms of relevance to the line/scene/story, then pick a localised word that hits as many of the higher ranked meanings as possible. In this case, there are many better localisations (read: localisations with meanings more relevant to the scene). If I were localising it, I would probably do this: "He took all the money I won from the pokies." but I am aware that pokies is an Australianism. Assuming I was localising for a global english speaking audience: "He took all the money I won from a slot machine".
(TBH though, I don't think パチンコ needs to be localised because the english equivalent loanword, pachinko, is already well known enough to be used in english subtitles imo)
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Thanks to your blog, I've recently developed a fond love for bug types! I'd love to hear some fun facts on Cutiefly when you have the time
Thanks for the kind words! Glad you like bug types now too, since a lot of people are scared of them. Nice to have another person who loves them <3
Cutiefly Facts
(Art by Sarah Yager in Dribble)
-The scientific name for Cutiefly is
"Bombylius cerinthus" which roughly translates to "bee-bread bumblebee"
-While they share a lot of similarities to the Combee line, Cutiefly aren't actually related and Cutiefly are actually in their own family called the Bombyliidae family
-Cutiefly are most commonly found in gardens and meadows, making their homes with other Cutiefly and Ribombee. They don't make hives and instead will form small groups together in logs or tree hollows
-Cutiefly in Galar often fly over to Gossifluer, trying to take some of their pollen. Gossifluer don't appreciate this much
-Sometimes, Cutiefly will eat so much pollen that they fall asleep in the flowers
-The Cutiefly in Alola are the biggest as they have the largest flowers to eat from
-Cutiefly and Ribombee have the same aura sensing abilities of Riolu and Lucario, but they're a lot weaker and only work on things like plants and some of their trainer's strong emotions. Apparently, when someone is excited, their aura resembles a flower in full bloom, which leads Cutiefly to gather around them. Researchers are still studying how aura can affect other things as well, and if there's a way for us to literally see it, like Lucario and Cutiefly can
-Cutiefly are hunted by pokemon like Lurantis, Spinarak, Pineco, and practically all bird-mon
-Like Yanma, Cutiefly can fly forward, backward, and sideways, all while facing the same direction
-While they enjoy Pollen and Nectar, Cutiefly also enjoy foods that are high in sugar, like Gatorade and fruit punch
-Cutiefly often swarm around Butterfree in fear that Butterfree will eat all of the pollen. But, this is only trained behavior, and it is safe to have both a Cutiefly and a Butterfree
-Cutiefly will often lay up to 15 small eggs at a time (gotta produce a lot when everything is hunting you)
-Cutiefly have an aversion to any kind of water since getting wet can make them have trouble flying, which is their only means of escaping predators. They get water from the nectar and fruit juice they drink from
(Art by Himekamome on Deviantart)
If you're curious, here are some Ribombee Facts!
#quill pokefacts#quill awnsers#cutiefly#pokemon biology#rotomblr#pokemon irl#pokeblogging#pokeblog#irl pokemon#pokemon#pokeblr#rotumblr#pkmn irl#pokemon roleplay#irl pkmn#pokedex#alolan pokedex
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Honestly, I like how Show Ellie managed to save herself from David in all ways possible: she killed him when he attempted to assault her, then ran from the burning building by herself. Idk, it's just incredibly important to me, the fact that she's her own hero and is able to recognize the moment she needs to stop because she is far more important than anything that David ever was and represented.
BUT, the follow up with Joel is kind of a let down. Yeah, sure, he calls her "baby girl," but... man, Game Joel was crying while holding her, and it's up to the audience to decide if it's because he's sorry he left her alone for so long, if he feels guilty because now she has killed a man with a machete and he wasn't there to help her, if he fears said man might've done something to her, or if it's just relief from seeing she's still alive (or a mixture of everything). He was crying and holding her and telling her "I'm never leaving you again, you understand?"
It helped depressurize the scene, show how much Joel relied on Ellie for comfort too, how it wasn't a "duckling thinks the first thing she saw is her parent" situation, but that they love each other mutually and completely. Joel's promise to Ellie also translates in the finale of both games too.
In the show... it kinda fell flat? It felt like they were desperate to wrap up the episode as quickly as possible, as if the more quiet parts of Joel and Ellie's relationship aren't worth seeing if they don't directly advance the plot.
I like the show, I love how they implemented Joel's PTSD and gave him panic attacks and depicted just how irrational grief can be by showing him mistaking that girl in Jackson for his Sarah, but... that post-David scene was so, so important for the development of his relationship with Ellie, and seeing how the writing treated it as if it was something not particularly meaningful makes me sad.
That's true. Giving Ellie the freedom to save herself in the show was maybe the ONE good thing about this scene when it comes to comparing it with the game version.
But then again, as you say, we got so much more from this scene in the game that we just have to compare it all the time, like it can't be unseen. I feel like we've been robbed of one of the best scenes in TLOU when it comes to HBO. This particular scene was as important as the scene at the farm house where Ellie and Joel had their confrontation. They nailed this scene. Then why did they decide to go down with the babygirl scene? I have no freaking idea. It's like they do half the story's justice and the other half they just don't because, why the fuck not, I guess.
I am very curious about what we will get in Season 2 and how many things are going to caress our hearts and how many things are going to piss us off on the contrary. I swear to God, it sometimes feels like Mazin hasn't heard about the game at all, and Druckmann just blankly stares at him and lets him demean the whole plot of the greatest story ever told.
*sigh*
#the last of us#tlou#ellie williams#ellie tlou#joel miller#joel tlou#ellie and joel#the last of us game#tlou game#the last of us hbo#tlou hbo#bella ramsey#pedro pascal#elliespuns answers
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20 questions for fic writers
Thanks for the tag @rebelrayne! @longbobmckenzie tagged me in the body of hers too so I’ll take it.
How many works do you have on ao3?
82 right now, but I’ve orphaned a few recently
What’s your total ao3 word count?
1,220,982. I’ve got about another 30-40k words in WIP documents right now, so almost one-amd-a-quarter million words 😨
What fandoms do you write for?
Love Island the Game, Too Hot to Handle game, Harry Potter (Dramione exclusive), Romance Club (Heaven’s Secret)
Top five fics by Kudos
Tell Me What You Want (HP)
This Time, I’m Serious
Jaded
Unhealthy
Kinktober 2022
TIL that my Harry Potter fic has overtaken TTIS even though TTIS has more hits.
Do you respond to comments?
Yes! There were a few on TTIS I missed that it would be awkward to reply to because it was so long ago, but I make a point of trying to reply to every comment.
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
The only sad ending I’ve ever written was the first chapter of Jaded which was originally done as a oneshot.
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Probably Welcome To Racers. They got the whole shebang. Love me a happily ever after.
Do you get hate on fics?
Not recently. I’ve had hate for my portrayals of Alex, Lucas, and Suresh. But I haven’t had any nasty anon comments in ages which is lovely.
Do you write smut?
Yeah it's kinda my thing.
Craziest crossover:
I don’t know if I’ve done many crossovers… maybe Bruno and Miri Make a Porno or All I Want for Christmas is You which is a hetero take on Red White and Royal blue?
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of!
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No but I think I would probably die of happiness.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I HAVE! All’s Fair in Casa Amor was written with my beautiful friends @i-boop-you and @crimswnred !!!!!!
All time favourite ship?
Dramione (new fave) but for LITG? Hard question because our fandom is so built around an MC. But with two canon characters? I secretly love a Bruno/Valentina. Also love Hope/Lucas. They just WORK.
What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
It’s gotta be Recovery. I have the whole thing planned in my head but I just have no motivation to write it at all. Other than that, I don’t see myself finishing Famous Last Words any time soon. If I was going to finish it I’d take it down and rewrite it to make it fully OF.
What are your writing strengths?
Smut probably, I’m not bad at it. I feel like my narrative pacing is alright, and my prose is decent despite it being really inconsistent.
What are your writing weaknesses?
I rely too much on dialogue. I miss all the little body language bits leading up to an important line that could take it from an ‘aww that’s sad’ to a ‘holy fuck I’m sobbing’. Luckily I have wonderful beta’s who help me with this.
But more than anything, characterisation. Forming a fully fleshed out character before I start the story. I struggle with it. I’ve always felt like I’m more of a storyteller, (a plot person) more than a deep dive into a character’s psyche kind of person. I love reading character driven stories though, but I think it’s something that comes with writing experience. I haven’t actually been writing for that long and I think I’m getting better at it, but it’s still a weak point.
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
I sometimes forget that people don’t like this. I LOVE it. I do try and use it sparingly though. It’s so nice to see a character conversing with someone in their native language. I try and put the English dialogue in brackets or italics unless it's rather clear what they're saying (like swearing).
First fandom you wrote in?
LITG
Favourite fic you've written?
I, like Sarah, absolutely hate this question. My fics are my children. I like some of them more than others, though (I never claimed to be the world's best mother). But I love them for different reasons.
I love Welcome to Racers because it was my first AU.
I loved The Only Two Things because I got to create an entire world, an entire city for my characters (Yes I'm aware Waterford, Ireland is a real place but God, I loved that story so much).
TT,IS was the first fic I started and it gave me the friends I have today and the amount of people who tell me it's S4 canon just makes my whole life.
Jaded was something different. It was a challenge to myself and I'm so proud of it.
Unhealthy has been the most difficult to write, but it's also pushed me the hardest in my development of characters.
FLW has been so much fun because I get to dive back into my music roots, urghhhhhh. Love.
I don't care if it's narcissistic. I re-read my fics on a regular basis. They're perfectly tailored to my taste. I love doing a nice re-read and sprinkling in a few extra details with liberal use of the edit button. If there was someone who knew my fics as well as I did, they'd get something a little bit different on every read. Might just be a line or two, might be a thought or a reaction, but I love to add and tweak and tinker with them all.
Love.
tagging: @i-boop-you @crimswnred @ellegreenwxy @tammyisobsessedwith @operationnope @sparxaf @eskiix
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20 Questions For Fic Writers
Tagged by @rngaredead :)
For simplicity's sake I'm going to go with just my biDEMONium/trentcrimminallybeautiful ao3 and not try to combine it with my thesorrowoflizards one (why do i have more than one? because i was, among other things, an idiot who didn't know how pseuds worked next question) even though that would probably double some of these numbers lkfjgh
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
Again, just on this account? 171 (some of those are oneshot compilations though)
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
661,851 for now
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Ted Lasso, The Mysterious Benedict Society, The House on the Cerulean Sea, House MD, Death by Dying, Instinct, King Falls AM. Also, sort of Gravity Falls. Mostly those first two though, tbh.
This one I think I will include other fandoms I've written and posted for on other accounts because it's fun and less about math.
So also Shadowhunters, The Librarians, The Mentalist, The Dresden Files (TV), Roswell New Mexico, The Sandman, Star Trek, Professor Layton, Sanders Sides, Miraculous Ladybug, and sort of The Legend of Zelda.
Also see, for unposted or posted a very long time ago and no longer something I would willingly share, Supernatural, Dirk Gently (both 2016 and 2010), Doctor Who, Warehouse 13, SurrealEstate, Person of Interest, Haven, Leverage, Bones. Psych, and probably more
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Ted Lasso Kisses Trent Crimm On The Mouth (Trent/Ted - 1,157 kudos)
semaphore (Trent/Ted; Trent & Colin - 997 kudos)
off the handle (Trent/Ted - 736 kudos)
linger (Trent/Ted - 709 kudos)
a preacher, a bikini, and a kiss or two (Trent/Ted; Diamond Dogs - 673 kudos)
5. Do you respond to comments?
I try to but I always get really busy/tired and then it's been so long it feels like it would be weird if I did. Plus, sometimes my answers by nature of the comments can get repetitive and then even though I'm being sincere I feel insincere which sucks.
However, if a comment has a direct question or something I actually have like, something unique to say about, I'm much more likely to respond sooner rather than later/never.
I appreciate every single comment soooo much though literally my motivation to get through the day like 80 percent of the time
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I'm going to stick with Ted Lasso fics here since I have so many fics posted and this is my Ted Lasso sideblog and say...
well, most of the time I have a bittersweet ending and then some sort of hopeful epilogue (such as with ink sunset and make a mess of you) but I guess betrayal's sting / absolution's balm or something to get off my chest may qualify?
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Uhhh, honestly, most of them are happy endings.
I think trick & treat and matters of the heart end on particularly high notes?
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not in this fandom! Yet
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Oh, yeah, baby. So much. Not sure what "kind" means in this context. It sure is explicit smut. I have tended almost exclusively towards hot transgender sex the last few years because. yknow. hi. but somehow I don't think that's the intention in the question.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I do, but I haven't posted a lot. Only one on this account (a Gravity Falls x The Mysterious Benedict Society crossover that started as a joke because of a shared actress) although I had an interesting Shadowhunters x The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess fusion on my other account.
I've written some pretty weird WIPs, though. And I've got some posts about Ted Lasso crossover/AUs, like a Sarah Jane Adventures AU, a Pushing Daisies AU, a Stardust AU... You can find that kind of thing in this tag on my blog.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yes. Not in this fandom, though, as far as I'm aware.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes! Again, not in this fandom, though.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Not really.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Oh, man, I don't know if I can decide. Magnus/Alec (TV version only I'll die on this hill) will always hold a special place in my heart, but I've got other "obsessed with this when I was a kid" ships and also recency bias/current hyperfixation means Trent/Ted screams as an immediate answer, and so on and so forth. I'm bad at picking favorites. Overall, I'd probably say one of those two, or both.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Sticking to Ted Lasso again (I have. so many MBS WIPs. god.) I'd say lost sight of (who you are) (lost motivation, want to finish, fuck!!) or sweeter than heaven (hotter than hell) (got mad at it), or!! oh!!! ink sunset (stuck) and possibly the next installment of matters of the heart. Yeah, I have a problem
16. What are your writing strengths?
I think I'm pretty good at being funny and also at eloquent but perhaps a little too verbose metaphors. I love me an elaborate metaphor
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
It's hard for me to focus and get what I have in my head out sometimes, even when I really want to. Whether it's being unable to organize or just my brain flat-out refusing to cooperate and do anything. Also, I'm way too like. easily discouraged with lack of feedback, and even a little negative feedback can kind of ruin my week and make me never wanna go back to that story ever again.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I just realized. The questions seemed familiar but I wasn't sure why and now I know, now that I've gotten to this question. I have done this game before and I remember bc of this question. I was confused bc it was under a different name, I think the questions were in a different order, and it was sometimes slightly differently worded but nope! This is the same one! Weird
Anyway, just for this particular question, I'm going to copy-paste my old answer because I'm lazy.
I’m extremely bad at linguistics in general, so if I must include someone talking in another language in my fic, I think I’d tend to cheat and do italics or some other indication that this is ‘in another language’ (ie “Where are you going?” she asked in Russian), but that’s admittedly a lazy approach. But I also think it’s probably better than butchering it with an auto-translator? Also, when people just include the translation in the end notes, even with a link (although that makes it marginally better) it breaks the flow of the story and makes it hard to read. Making an effort to at least match grammar is good (which I would do if it was for longer than a single scene, probably) but I think the best solution is when people know what they’re doing and like, have an actual translation with a little html code so you can click on it and it reveals what it means? Or if you’re clever, revealing what it means using context around it, but that has its own limitations. So that both like, uses the actual language and doesn’t break up the flow. It balances accessibility, flow, and respect for the other language in question well. But you’ve got to both know what you’re doing with the language (either asking someone/hiring someone/knowing the language yourself) and the html (although there are guides for that you’d have to spend time figuring it out + know it exists in the first place to look). And this is fanfiction, something we ultimately do for free in our spare time, so the lazy approach, I think, can be understandable. Maybe not in every context, but it’s not worth stressing a lot over in a few random lines or anything, you know? It is really cool when people do know a language well enough to include it properly in a fic, though, it can say a lot about a character or dynamic; and their background(s) and like. it’s neat :)
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Ever? Doctor Who. And I don't remember the order, but after that I know I wrote some stuff about Star Trek (mostly TNG but I believe also TOS), Supernatural, A:LTA, Marvel, WTNV, and the Stanley Parable? I think I first posted either Supernatural or WTNV
20. Favourite fic you’ve written?
I have no idea. Some of my top ones (for Ted Lasso again) would be matters of the heart and trick & treat I suppose?
Tagging: whoever wants to do this man, I probably tagged everyone I'd normally tag last time so if you see this and you wanna do it, go ahead and tag me and do it!
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hi!! first just wanted to say i love your fics so much; they're so lovely & i adore how you weave in art history (as a fellow art history gal) and can clearly feel your immense love for it within your words.
anyway! i caught up on winterlude (adore so so much btw), and i loved the mention of anna karenina (s/o it also being mentioned in ahb!) as it's one of my favorite books ever. which leads me to my question: what are your favorite books ever (fiction, nonfiction art history ones, etc.)? i also LOVE the goldfinch, so i think we'd have very similar taste <3 thanks for sharing your work with us !!!
hello!! hi!!! ahhh thank you so much for the sweet words!!! <333 :,))) it makes me so happy to hear that all my love for this subject translates!! bc i swear i could burst with it sometimes !!!
as for some of my favorite books!!
wuthering heights, pride and prejudice, anna karenina, as i lay dying, the bell jar, play it as it lays, what my mother and i don't talk about, and of course my all time favorite, the goldfinch!!!
art/art history wise though:
john berger's ways of seeing is up there for me! (if you only read one of the essays he's written let it be the third one which you can read here! and you can read the whole thing here!
i also just recently read a very good book called art monsters: unruly bodies in feminist art by lauren elkin which was a great read!!!
this dark country by rebecca birrell is also a good one, though kind of difficult to get into at the beginning.
and i can never speak highly enough of 7 days in the art world by sarah thornton
#asks#winterlude#i'm sure there are many more but these are the ones coming to me off the top of my head !!
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Questions for Writers
Haven't done one of these ever so... here we go :D Thanks for the tag @riversofmars
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
128
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
1,815,281
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Last Tango in Halifax
Doctor Who
Happy Valley
Collateral
As long as we have Nicola Walker and/or Sarah Lancashire I'm there!
Some of the others include:
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
These Are The Days Of Our Lives - a series of Last Tango in Halifax fics based on prompts from Tumblr, these were meant to be one shots but found myself weaving it all together int oa bigger story!
The Story - my canon companion to Last Tango - weaving things around the canon with no divergence to make it a love story - this was bloody hard!!!
More Time, More Life, More Feeling - another Last Tango, and probably one of my favourites - I still read this fairly often like a little comfort blanket haha.
The Big L. - my very first outing with Last Tango. I still love this story even though I look back at it and cringe a little giving it was the first thing I ever wrote, but it means a lot to me.
Fall On Me - a collab that I did with @question-of-perception that explores things from a different perspective for Last Tango!
I've actually written far more for DW than LTIH but you wouldn't know it!
5. Do you respond to comments?
Of course! Each and every one, it's so lovely when I get them and I get so excited!!
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I'm definitely a happy endings girl and I can't stand it when things don't work out, so this is hard... Maybe
Between the Eyes because it wasn't an immediate resolution?
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Hahah all of them have happy endings! I would probably have to say
New Day Coming for DW, perhaps, although love the one for What Christmas Means To Me as well. In terms of Last Tango in Halifax, probably The Big L. because I was so determined to give them their happy ending, its fluffy mcfluff.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Thankfully no, I would definitely cry hahah.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Um. Yes. Probably too much, but its a public service, right? RIGHT?!
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Yes, all the time! My maddest one is probably Call It Dreaming which is a crossover between DW/Last Tango/Happy Valley/Collateral and also has some Stranger Things elements... That was madness, haha.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of! Hope it stays that way...
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I feel like I'm some kind of co-writing slut, hahaha. Yes. With @riversofmars, @question-of-perception, @mrskeeleyhawes, @meluisart, @pocketofpencils and also with some of the folks over at the Hebden Bridge Discord Server. I really enjoy it!
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
It's a close toss up between Caroline Mckenzie Dawson/Gillian Greenwood and Liv Chenka/Helen Sinclair <3
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Hmm... I've got a lot of ideas for different things that I make notes on and a few WIPS, but I'm sure I will come back to them eventually!!
16. What are your writing strengths?
Maybe dialogue? To be honest I don't really know, I just go for it and hope for the best hahaha.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I feel that sometimes I fall back on the same language/phrasing for things and I annoy myself, and always think it's super noticeable in my writing!
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I have the odd bit where there is a point but otherwise CBA. I don't speak any other languages haha.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Last Tango in Halifax.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
Whyyyyy do I have to choose just one?! I love More Time, More Life, More Feeling for Last Tango, Interstellar for DW (the middle section is probably, in my head, one of the better bits of writing I've done), Danger Zone because Top Gun AU makes me die, and also Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost with @riversofmars because Lord of the Rings was the first fic that I ever read way back when I was an angsty teen fangirl. Hah.
Tagging some people I think might be interested but anyone who sees this and fancies it, please fell free! @katiedingo @meluisart @ultramassivecollectorcupcakeblr @pocketofpencils @darkbloomiana
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Stole this from @curator-on-ao3. (Thank you for the open tag!)
1. how many works do you have on Ao3?
111, not including the dozens of ficlets and short one-shots I've posted as separate chapters in fic collections.
2. what's your total Ao3 word count?
614,875 and counting.
3. what fandoms do you write for?
I've written for: Star Trek (TOS/AOS/DISC), Star Trek: Enterprise, Labyrinth (1986), Marvel, Once Upon a Time, Shadow and Bone, and LOTR: The Rings of Power.
4. what are your top five fics by kudos?
The Princess and the King (Labyrinth, Jareth/Adult Sarah) A little girl wanders into the Underground and Jareth's life is forever changed. [3,467 words]
Text Alert (MCU, Loki/Jane Foster) Late one night, Jane found herself in an online chat room for Harvard alums. She and the user youweremadetoberuled hit it off and began a strange, anonymous friendship. [16,129 words]
Intoxicated (Star Trek TOS/AOS/DISC, Sarek/Amanda Grayson) Amanda Grayson sets out to make nice with Sarek, the infuriating Vulcan ambassador to Earth. Her future career prospects are on the line, after all. There's only one problem: the ambassador isn't quite himself. [9,034 words]
Drunk Dial (Labyrinth, Jareth/Adult Sarah) Five times Sarah drunk-called the Goblin King. One time he sobered her up. [7,138 words]
Touch (MCU, Loki/Jane Foster) The first touch was her fist to his jaw, and she thought the last was when he pushed her out of the way of a Dark Elf bomb—until he showed up years later with a proposition she had trouble turning down. [4,014 words]
5. do you respond to comments?
Yes, absolutely. That's my favorite part about writing fic—being able to interact with readers. Sometimes I'm slow in replying, but I promise I always will.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I have a few stories with unhappy endings, but I think this one is the most gut-wrenching read: Just a Dream (Labyrinth, Jareth/Adult Sarah) He can have her in their shared dreams, but is it enough? Obsession can be a dangerous thing. [1,644 words]
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I tend to mostly write happy endings—at least for stories that have a proper ending. I think there would be too many to list here.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
It's happened infrequently. I just delete the comments. I'm too old and tired for that kind of manufactured drama.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
No, not really. I mean I have a few—very few—M-rated stories, but it's pretty much all feelings with pretty words and metaphors. The tension is my favorite part. When it comes to resolving it, I tend to be a "pan to the sky" writer.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I have written a couple. The zaniest? When Fairy Tale Meets Mythology (OUAT, Captain Swan; MCU, Loki/Jane Foster) While searching for Henry, Emma and Hook happen upon a strange couple in Neverland. [1,209 words]
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I was asked once, but I don't know if they followed through. I have had someone turn one of my stories into a podfic, though.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yep. I'm a fandom old. I hail from the days of doing fic Round Robins and fandom Big Bangs.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
The USS Enterprise NCC 1701 D, though the Jolly Roger comes in as a close second.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
The companion fic to Three Months on Vulcan where we follow the escapades of Soval and Amanda Cole as she works as his assistant. I was going to call it Lost in Translation. But my drive to write it has fizzled out over the years. I just don't have it in me.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Fleshed out characters, humor, pretty prose, banter.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
F I N I S H I N G. Seriously, that's my goal for 2024: to finish at least 3 of my languishing multi-chapter fics. Also, I want to improve my longfic game. I tend to rush through the plot.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I've done it, though I try not to overdo it. And I try to make it easy for the reader to understand from context so they don't have to constantly jump to end notes for the translations. I've been super fortunate to have a native-speaking fandom friend help me with Norwegian for some of my MCU stories. I've used Google Translate for Icelandic, and the Vulcan Language Database. Trying to write in Quenya is the worst, though. Never again! *gives Tolkien a side-eye*
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Star Trek: Enterprise
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
That's like asking me to choose a favorite child. How about one for each fandom:
Through the Dark Mirror Series (Star Trek: Enterprise, Trip/T'Pol) Stories that take place before, during, and after the events of the "In a Mirror, Darkly" episodes. [14,633 words and counting]
Pertinacious Wills (Labyrinth, Jareth/Adult Sarah) Regency AU Sarah Williams’s life is turned upside down when her widowed father remarries. At the same time, a new lord has taken over the Labyrinth who may be the most insufferable man Sarah has ever known. But as she is thrown in, quite against her will, with him and his kind, she discovers mysteries that call to question everything she thought she knew. [46,963 words and counting]
Blood for Blood (MCU, Loki/Jane Foster) He missed his chance by a heartbeat—the difference between life and death. Now, the mantle of savior rests on Loki’s shoulders. Will the mercurial God of Mayhem rise to the challenge of rescuing the nine realm from eternal darkness? [4,330 words]
The Worth of a Broken Soul (OUAT, Outlaw Queen) As a Keeper of the Watch, Robin hasn't been a mortal's personal guardian in centuries, but he's been tasked with a special case. Regina Mills is full of hate and anger, her aura so black it's difficult to find any hope left inside of her. Robin is determined to succeed in his assignment, even if it requires unconventional methods, but drawing her closer to Redemption is changing him as well. Will he pay any price for her salvation? For the salvation, too, of the lost souls he's unwittingly collected along the way? [14,407 words and counting]
The Nightwalker Chronicles Series (OUAT, Captain Swan) Emma Swan is an expert private investigator, but recently she's witnessed things that even she cannot explain. The only one willing to help her safely navigate the underbelly of the city in search of answers is the man who saved her life, a mysterious artist with secrets of his own. [6,448 and counting]
I haven't written much for either Shadow and Bone or The Rings of Power, and I don't feel like I have proper favorites for them.
Yes, I know I'm not listing any of my comedies, dear friend who knows who they are. That's because they aren't *my* favorites.
Tagging: Are you a fic writer? Consider yourself tagged by me—if you want to play, that is.
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Hello! I hope you are doing well :)
(I needed help from a translator to write this, I apologize for the errors that this text will probably have)
Firstly, I would like to express my admiration for you. I cultivated it through reading the criticisms so well placed by you about the universe of ACOTAR.
I, having had a very intense relationship with reading over the years, was starting to despair after reading the first three ACOTAR books because I felt very alone when I realized that apparently there were almost no real critical analyzes (that I had found) about this book saga. It was then that I found Tumblr and, along with it, some very interesting profiles that talked about what I wanted to talk about. Yours was one of them.
My experience with ACOTAR is quite complex. When I first heard about it (given its growing fame), I loved the plot, as I love reading fantasy. I cultivated expectations on my own, but I also place this on fame and people's enthusiasm (and hatred) for some characters that I will later mention. So I read it… and damn, I was so disappointed after the second book. I fell off the horse completely, as some would say here where I live. I couldn't believe how SJM started to fail so much with the entire initial proposal of the books and how she managed to fail in developing characters and plots with so much potential. Furthermore, the romanticization of abuses, retcons, plot holes, catchphrases to deceive readers, narratives conflicting with actions, failure to make clear the biased narrative... among many other things. But one of the things that shocked me the most was how, to this day, many people fail to see certain FACTS and the FAULTS in all of this, their only reactions when these are pointed out are irrational responses in defense of this created illusion. Rhysand is the most disappointing character I've ever read in my life, perhaps because I see the potential that could be used in him, Sarah's true protagonist (this is just one of the things that completely annoy me about the author and, consequently, the character).
I could cite MANY examples of the flaws I mentioned, as you mentioned throughout your posts, but one thing that really bothers me is the way the characters and the fandom itself treat Nesta, trapped in the blind illusion that everything that IC does is the right thing, since that's what they think and say. It's really disgusting. I don't know why in the world I deluded myself into thinking that Nesta being the protagonist of Silver Flames would improve anything by knowing her critical perspective on the IC and things in general, since she is not very influential and very observant. I honestly don't know why I did this to myself, knowing what SJM did with the previous books.
Tamlin and Nesta are sensitive points for me, being the main characters that led me to, in fact, have an increasingly critical view of these books (they were my critical awakening). I realized that one of the main common points that makes me upset is the way Rhysand deals with them, just like he deals with anyone: the way he wants, without reprimands (sometimes it's even encouraged). As if it were his right.
I understand that Rhysand's relationship with each of them has different complex layers, especially with Tamlin as it is a story that has been developing for much longer and is something personal to Rhysand AND Tamlin (in contrast to Nesta, who had never done anything for him), although there are very superficial mentions of it in proportion to how much Rhys gets involved and returns to it throughout the books (some would say that he simply needs to have Tamlin in his life constantly because of the way he always finds a way to mention it him or go see him, he can't let go). I have A LOT of things to say about this, but I'm summarizing.
About Nesta, someone very young in comparison and who was hated by Rhys before he even met her. He didn't even give her a chance to observe her a little or ask her anything. I would think he should be intelligent and more mature because of his age and how he likes to show that he knows how to handle things, but that's not what his actions show in most of the books.
Sometimes I think he picks on Nesta and Tamlin so much because they are the only ones who actually stand up to him, question him and throw his actions in his face. They don't accept his stance easily and they have the courage to respond accordingly. They are the big stones in his expensive and nocturne shoes.
I'm not going to start talking too much about Feyre per se, but I would like to point out that I hate with all my mental strength the daemati shipp feysand and I hope in a childish way that they fictionally read this in my mind. In my view, they have absolutely nothing good or remotely interesting to add and develop from each other. Rhysand calls them equals in every way, but he always knows things and chooses what to say to her as is convenient for him. He tells her she has a choice, but he is the only one who provides the options he wants her to choose. Feyre stopped questioning, she believes anything he says from the start. She even stopped analyzing her own actions. He gives her a false appearance of power and she pretends that she knows how to use it. On the first opportunity to introduce her to the CoN, he undermines any kind of respect they could develop for her, whether through fear (as stupid and lame as that may be) or what. Her personality was an ocean and since she started dating Rhys, the ocean had become a shallow puddle of mud. It seems that the trend is getting worse, seeing as how SJM has been showing us who her main character is. Feyre was a means to the end, nothing about her position in this saga was constructed in a decent way, unfortunately. Rhys does what he wants and doesn't have the limits he should have, bringing this to Feyre when in Summer he tells Tarquin that she does whatever she wants, without thinking about the consequences, just because she carries a title that Rhys gave to her. She can do what she wants because HE is saying so. It's not about Feyre, as the catchphrase makes it seem. This is not a moment taken to glorify her in front of others. At this moment Rhysand wants to show and prove his power to another male who should have the same authority as him, Tarquin. This guy's ego, seriously.
Anyway, amidst so many opinions about the things I'm curious to know, I'd like to ask what you think is the REAL reason for Rhys' growing dislike towards Nesta (and Tamlin too, if you want. I I don't buy the superficiality with which the whole thing about the murder of their families was told, but that's just me pondering). And the possibilities surrounding Nesta and Rhysand's complex relationship, expectations and even what you would have changed. If you want to respond, of course.
Today I found myself reflecting on this specifically and I'm still putting things together in my head, so I decided to share this question with you.
This “message” was much longer than I expected, I ended up getting carried away and had to stop myself from saying more. At this point, I don't even judge if you haven't read it, hehe. I appreciate it anyway if you read any part of this.
Anyway, thank you very much for sharing your analysis. I feel so represented with them! I will continue to follow you here, XD
Xx, Tess
Awwww I got teary reading this message! Thank you so much, Tess! And I agree with so much of what you’ve said here! This book series crumbles under the slightest bit of analysis, and I’m glad so many of us have started to realize that. I’m glad you feel represented here and ill definitely continue to be here :)
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Big Brother
Summary: your brother died and JJ doesn’t like your
Request: no
Warnings: talk of death, dead bro, mean comments, JJ being an ass, fluffy end.
My brother just died and this is how I got my anger and emotions out. I’m sorry if it’s bad.
MY WORK IS NOT TO BE REPOSTED, TRANSLATED OR COPIED PLEASE DON’T STEAL MY WORK!!
*******************************************************
You’re on your way to the Château for the first time since your brother just died you haven’t really been up to hanging out much is Justin died he died three months ago and it’s been really hard. Justin was your rock. Both of your parents passed away when you were seven since then Justin has been there whenever you needed him wherever you needed him I guess until now .
“ hey yn look who finally decided to show up” JB said giving you a hug.
“ it’s good to see you guys.” You said giving Sarah a hug.
“ how have you been since Justin?” Sarah asked.
You spelt, tears sting in your eyes at the mention of Justin‘s nam.
“ i’ve been all right it’s just hard because I still tried to call him and text him and I wake up and realize he’s gone.” You say in a sad tone.
“ come on we have to go pick JJ and Pope up.” JB said.
JJ maybank he never really liked you don’t know why he just… anytime you talk to get mad at you randomly for no reason to hurt your feelings sometimes but just you know, we said that tell men wore.
You were torn away from your thoughts by JJ speaking.
“ ugh, who invited Miss emotional.” JJ asked clearly upset.
“ I did she needs to get out of her house.” Sarah said.
“ oh, so we’re babysitters now is that it?” Jj said with an eye roll.
“ dude stop being such a dick all the time.” Kie said.
“ I’m not being a dick all I’m saying is that why can’t she go hang out with her brother or some shit? Why does she have to hang out with us?”
Jj said.
You start tearing up at his words.
“ I mean come on man look at her she’s already crying again. He said pointing a finger at her.
“ John B can you just take me home? I’m sorry for intruding. OK I’m didn’t even wanna be here. you know what fuck you. if I could hang out with my brothers still I would be instead of sitting here. Bitch about how I’m fucking snob and stuck up when I’ve done literally nothing to you. I’m sorry that my brother just died and that I have nobody anymore OK but don’t worry I’ll be off the island soon enough!!”
Right then all there faces dropped as JB pulled up to the dock you jumped off with all your belongings and ran to your car.
“ JJ what the actual fuck is wrong with you. She just lost her brother. The only family she had left. And your mad at her for grieving! How much more of a dick could you be? Hm?” Sarah yelled at him.
“ I-I didn’t know. I’m I’m sorry. I’m really sorry okay?” Jj said flustered.
“ okay. First of all how the fuck did you not know? Second of all why are you telling us sorry when it should be yn you need to apologizing to?” Pope said.
“ okay okay I’m going.” The blond said
Time skip at your house. ( sorry I’m lazy)
“ what do you want Jj? Hm? To make fun of me some more?” You asked anger laced in your voice.
“ no. No actually I came to say I’m sorry. And I am I’m sorry for today and not only today but every other day too. It’s just your so nice and pretty and I- I don’t know. I just.. I know I’m out of your league and I didn’t want to get attached. But it’s not about me it’s about you and I’m really sorry.” The blond looked at you shyly.
Your heart felt like it was on fire. He liked you. JJ Maybank liked you.
“ I want to say it’s okay but it’s not J. Everything you said really hurt me. But I do like you too.” You admitted.
“ Is there any way I can make it up to you.” He asked a little taken back with the fact that you like him.
“ actually two things. One you stay and we hang out eat some dinner and learn more about each other. And two you take me on a date.” You said with a slight smile.
“ absolutely.” He said with a huge smile on his face.
Things may not be good right now, but maybe with JJ and the pouges things could eventually get better.
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HELLO, HELLO...
This just in.
A fabulous Y2K Boo just slipped off the edges of Instagram and just became your latest source of Gossip
You may believe i'm just some squeez in a basement, or some bored suburbian trash, or maybe even someone on the outside looking in.
Here's the tea.
One thing about being on the inside. Once you get there you don't allways get to choose where you stand... sometimes you need to take a step outside, clear your head and remind yourself of who you are and venture out into the real world.
Good Morning from your newest arrival, yours trully, my name is D.
Todays rendezvous, the 1st of many will be about Social Media, and the power it holds on people, children, media, status, fame, politics and mental health, etc, you know it.
And so by it's definition, in case you haven't realised and had to do a quick search, Instagram, "it's a platform to showcase talents, build a personal brand, and promote businesses. It offers visual inspiration and the opportunity to engage with like-minded individuals and brands."
Can you relate? Great. Neither can anyone.
Are you and Insta Scroller or a Facebook Babe? Take THIS in.
Social Media platforms like Instagram, Whatsapp and Facebook are on the Top 10 List of Social Media with most active users.
Did you know Zuckerberg Bae's are on the top with 2.11 billion active daily typers. Half of them are probably your kids.
What? You think you're not old to have your own spawn?
I am 25. Remember that.
(By now, and don't lie to me, you checked the notification bar twice, at least, or are you maybe checking as i speak? Rude)
Fuelled by numbers and translated into graphics, the internet has done it's job and came back to me with usefull intel.
Half of SMU's (Social Media Users) are bellow 45 years, and I the less searched categories are "Usefull Content" and "Relevant". Yes Boomers. Right back at you. One of the most searched though is informative content. Of how recent studies (Tik Tok misinformation) came to us once again as proof of nothing.
Most of the posts portrayed in all the 10 categories provided by Statista.com (Thank you Gurl *wink* 💋) are a departure from tge category.
You see where i'm trynnna get?
Internet and Technology where bounded to us with the purposes of communication, information and as intelligente working tool, not just to lounge.
We have at tip of our hands one of the most powerful tools ever made, and you're gonna waste it on posting a hot tip about your breakfast? What does that say about you? Will it flop? Will they laugh? Or worst... God forbid, be cancelled.
Are these the things you think b4 posting?
These websites can be addictive, promote body dismorphia, anxiety and contribute to FOMO (yeah. we all have it gurl. pipe down)
Babez here, is trynna tell you to go live your life.
As I speak, more Innocent fools, maybe like yourself, are having their lives ruined by Social Media.
Yess henny, FOMO, you are already missing out, on your friends, a lovelly walk, or just the simple pleasure of recognising a familiar face. Tik Tok Tik Tok Y2K'rs, your time is running on the clock for a golden press.
Dissociation from reality can be set apart of all this, but if you think it over, it can really mean something much more deeper than to pass time.
Buckle up Peeps, this is a thing, its a study made by Sarah McQuate in University Of Washington.
Okay in short. We are as a young population very shamed about allways being on our phones, right?
That has a reason. Like when you read a good source of Hot Goss 💅🏻, or a book if you're into it, you can get lost in it right?
Think with me, we all read bad books, but everybody with me "BOOKS ARE THE SHIT".
THINK about all the unproofed misinformation gathering about in SM, compact it, and all it's negative effects, cut a few lines of text, add the caption and voilá! Years of mental instability and a prolonged sence of Dissociation while navigating your Socials (Stay off your phone will you read this.)
The reason we do it tho.
Social Media was not made to maximise what humans value. Period.
Quoting, yet another associated Researcher to this project, Amanda Baughan:
•"social media platforms are designed to keep people scrolling. When we are in a dissociative state, we have a diminished sense of agency, which makes us more vulnerable to those designs and we lose track of time. These platforms need to create an end-of-use experience, so that people can have it fit in their day with their time-management goals.”
(I'll leave the study here jic, https://www.washington.edu/news/2022/05/23/people-enter-a-dissociative-state-when-using-social-media/ ).
Looking at a laptop or a cell all day is bad, but doing that for the Socials, henny, it's soo 2015.
It's killing your mind, your hangouts, your friends mental stability and your kids (Don't).
And for an afterthought, Social Media Content Creators, as an Artiste (Clock the Work), the freedom of speech that you hand out, is overrated.
Because now, not just massive corporations have a platform, we all do, and if we could hold hem accountable for every cyberbully, every rover, every mean girl, social media would be a hostable party might i say 🤷🏻
Go watch the following video too! https://youtu.be/wQdcCiVb59g?si=pefj5yngsodJF4tV
youtube
For as long hot updates, drama and chaos are on check, nobody cares, right?
Its fine as long as you post a pic or send a mean text.
It won't even phase you.
You stash your lockscreen away and fade into all the negativity you absorved from the radiocative toothorn on your pocket.
Maybe some photo you saw.
Some post about a douche bashing something or someone relating to you.
Maybe a text some coward sent u, cause dude ain't got balls for shit.
In my day, i had to take the crap right to my face, but you know what it taught me outside of the Webz?
Worry not Y2K readers, in a world full of shade, if it hits you, it means you'll shine through.
And as for me?
It takes two to tango, but only me to talk.
Get used to it,
-D
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20 Author Questions
thanks to @statelysapphicfor the tag!!!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
28!
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
162,944
3. What fandoms do you write for?
it's that sweet gwendoline chistie brain rot for me :))
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
push me gently (into love) -> (nsfw) -> two chapter Larissa x reader story in which reader is an art teacher at Nevermore. fluffy, cozy, and sweet, featuring easily skippable smut. rom-com vibes.
when the last restraint is gone -> (ongoing) (nsfw) -> an intense victorian romance between Jane Murdstone and her lady's maid, Laura. sort of in the style of Sarah Waters's historical romance novels. heavily influenced by Vita and Virginia's love letters. featuring a lot of sensually read victorian poetry and dirty, delicious smut.
danger level - one (nsfw) -> filthy smut featuring the good ol' sex pollen trope. Phasma x fem!stormtrooper!reader. hot and a bit silly. straightforward and simple porn lol.
particular (nsfw) -> Larissa Weems x (adult) Wednesday Addams, aka the fic that got me cancelled. ongoing, but written. still in the process of posting it. rom-com with dark humour and some more mature themes, but still relatively light. sort of a coming-of-age story.
so very chivalrous (and so completely oblivious) -> Brienne x princess!reader. very fluffy. Brienne is very good with a sword, but a bit oblivious in the matters of love. featuring good ol' lesbian yearning.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
i try my best to! i feel like i either wanna rant abt my blorbos and my thought process or i want to be polite. someone took the time to write a comment, and i feel like that warrants a thank you!
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
hmmmmm. perhaps the sad ending option for my ruin tastes so sweet (almost as sweet as your lips) -- it's a choose your own adventure story!
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
it would have to be either so very chivalrous (and so completely oblivious) or push me gently (into love) which now that i think about have a lot of kudos and comments and hits, so i guess ppl love happy endings hahah
8. Do you get hate on fics?
i'm the queen of controversy apparently, and i was cancelled! but the fic itself didn't get as much hate as ppl didn't even wanna read it lol, i personally got hate mail. so fics? i suppose not. but there is still time, who knows what else i'll post (i know, and ppl will likely have opinions about it)
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
i very much do lol. the real hot kind :)
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
i've written exactly one! larissa x phasma bc. reasons. it's smut. chrome and lipstick
11. Have you ever had a fiction stolen?
not to my knowledge! but ppl have heavily copied my work :)
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
not to my knowledge!
13. Have you ever co-writtten a fic before?
tried to, but the person in question sorta ghosted me lol
14. What's your all-time favorite ship?
ughhhhh idk man. i guess the one i spent the longest being obsessed with is malora. i have a dark past lol.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
i hope to finish them all Eventually lol but idk, we shall see!
16. What are your writing strengths?
characterisation, point blank haha. i have a sense of rhythm that i sometimes put to good use.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
uhhh i tend to be vague abt things i am bored with while i write, and plot driven things aren't my forte. i can get very dash and comma happy lol. sometimes i tend to Fixate on a word or a phrase and i'm like okay gurl let it go lol, you've used this too many times. i am not very meticulous and i hate doing outlines and i feel like Sometimes it Shows. i feel like sometimes you can tell english is not my native language no matter how hard i try.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
speak the language at least somewhat, please. otherwise it's really hard for it to land well. personally, i feel very lukewarm about it
19. First fandom you wrote for?
uhhhhh. i honestly don't remember. supergirl perhaps?? or ouat.
20. Favorite fic you've ever written?
our little dance and particular :)
tagging: @the-frankenman-writes @dianneking @zephyr-is-tired @alder-saan @notinmyvocab @theflashesoflove
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the last of us coming out right before sab just makes this so much worse for me imo. like an adaptation doesnt have to be beat for beat exactly like the source material to be good. the last of us wasnt. but what they included made the story BETTER. changing bill and frank’s storyline made it BETTER. giving us more time with sarah made it BETTER. and sometimes translating from one medium to another means it CANT be an exact adaptation. sometimes a story is told better in one medium than another. but the way they wrote both seasons of sab so far just feels like disrespecting the source material. changing things for no reason other than to make it different is stupid. translating exact scenes from the books to the show doesn’t mean the scene makes the same impact because it wasnt earned. its just frustrating to watch.
also fuck the writers for basically brushing past inej’s trauma over the last couple seasons fuck that
Honestly it's actually so perfect because it completely kills all the "well adaptations are never going to be as good/just be grateful you have something" arguments. There is not a single change to the crows story that is in any way an improvement on the source material, and even the stuff they kept word for word was made worse by it's inclusion. I got most of my "stop erasing Inej's trauma" ranting out when the first season came back, but to all the people telling me that "they'll unpack it later, stop judging them", I say a hearty "shut the fuck up"
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