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#santa clause movie
imhkenobi · 2 years
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bernard the elf supremacy !
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stydixa · 6 months
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THE SANTA CLAUSE (1994) Dir. John Pasquin
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generalkenobee · 9 months
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Having sinful thoughts of riding bernards thigh😃 (the velvet would feel so good tho🤭)
"Not so silent night"
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•Warnings: smut, thigh riding, mentions of being caught, mentions of female masterbation, FEM! Reader, let me know if I missed anything
•Synopsis: (Y/N) is feeling really neglected and Bernard doesn't seem to notice till she's practically humping him like a dog...
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Christmas Eve..now this was quite the sight. Elf's everywhere, Santa on his second check of the list, and Bernard...oh Bernard.
He was everywhere all at once, trying to make sure everything was in order making sure that no cookie was burnt, every wrapped gift looked perfect. Not to mention he had to keep Curtis in order.
And you knew how selfish you were being. You were always selfish when it came to your boyfriend. Selfish because you saw the way certain elf girls looked at him
You knew what a vital part of the workshop he was but you just couldn't bring yourself to care. You'd spent countless nights touching yourself since the start of November, moaning so loud..maybe even hoping he would hear and come accommodate for you.
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You say in you and your boyfriends shared room watching a movie while he was out doing who knows what. And once again the same as the past two months. You were horny
You waited patiently for Bernard to arrive so you could ask for some desperately needed attention.
Everything seemed to be heightened, the way the sheets felt against your legs, the cold winters air on brushing your neck. It was almost like you were a dog in heat
If there was anyone to see the look on your face they would know. Anyone but Bernard.
He walked into the room with his brows furrowed carrying a bunch of rolled up blue prints "hi sweetheart" no response. "Bernie?" Nothing.
You say looking at his back as he sat down at his desk tracing his index finger over the words and print onto the blue paper and sighed
You were already built up as it was so seeing him moving his fingers around like that was just..wow
Before you could think your body was already moving, feet carrying you until you were standing behind him with your hands in his hair.
"Bernard..." you ran your hands down to his shoulders and collar bones rubbing and squeezing "please come lay with me" your voice pleading with him begging for affection.
"you know that I can't" his response was short and cold. I mean he didn't even look up at you when he said it.
---
He wasn't budging. Nothing..and you needed him. You needed to feel him...
You slowly walked over to the large fire place after you grabbed a box of matches off his desk. You watched the fire start as you walked over to turn off the lights so the room was just enough lit to seem romantic.
"(Y/N) I can't see the-" he halted when you sat down on his thigh resting all your weight on him "(Y/N)..?" You weren't wearing anything under your red nightdress...just in case.
The velvet of his pants..oh my god...
"mmm.." your hips started slowly moving forward and back and you placed your hands in his hair throwing your head back "m' love you.." your hips sped up
Bernard looked up at you with a sad look on his face.
"poor baby...so built up so horny...humping me like a dog" it felt so good to finally have your boyfriend's attention back. To have him look at you again like he needed you.
"I'm so sorry baby..I've been neglectful hm?" You looked up at him with doe eyes nodding your head "mhm.."
"we'll be a good girl and get yourself off on my thigh. Use me to make yourself feel good. You deserve it."
You sped up now moving your hips in small fast circles feeling your orgasm approach "Bernard...I-" you cut yourself off with a loud moan
"shh you don't want everyone knowing how you act when we're alone do you?" You shook your head "no sir"
Bernard loves being called sir. Being head elf and all, it really boosts his ego.
He rested his hands on your hips to help you speed up "yeah you don't want anybody to know you're the head elf's little slut" he rested his lips on your neck "but we both know you are"
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"please baby. Please stain my pants with your hot need" that was all you needed. You were pushed over the edge. The coil in your stomach snapped just as fast as it was built up "Bernard I'm cumming- shit shit shit oh my- nughh-"
His hand rested on the side of your face as you rode out your orgasm kissing you as you moaned into his mouth.
"t-thank you..."
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theyuletidecarols · 7 months
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𝐵𝑒𝓁𝒾𝑒𝓋𝑒 𝐼𝓃 𝒯𝒽𝑒 ꩇׁׅ݊ɑׁׅ֮ᧁׁꪱׁׅᝯׁ 𝒪𝒻 ℭ𝔥𝔯𝔦𝔰𝔱𝔪𝔞𝔰
✩‧₊˚🎅🏻🎄🦌📜
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suddenly--sam · 6 months
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Ti's the season and what not, Bernard season
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gritsandbrits · 6 months
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This should be considered a hate crime.
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fictionadventurer · 6 months
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Unexpectedly brilliant choice for The Santa Clause movie to have (most of) its elves played by children. Usually, eternally young elves are, like, 20 to 30 years old. But this eternal youth is eternal childhood. These elves maintain the childlike faith and wonder of "the spirit of Christmas" that makes the North Pole such a magical place. Children know this place exists without seeing it, so of course the elves that run it are eternal children!
But that's also why Santa Claus has to be an adult! Children receive the wonders of Christmas, but giving and charity are adult actions. Santa Claus has to be childlike enough in spirit to maintain wonder and faith, but adult enough to provide for all the children of the world. The nonsensical worldbuilding might have a thematic point to make!
Whether it was intentional or unintentional, it's kind of a brilliant expression of the movie's themes of childhood vs. maturity, and I can't believe I've only just now considered it.
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thisgirlsophia · 1 year
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HC’s for Bernard the Elf dating a Sweet!Reader
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(gifs not mine)
I wrote this all the way back at the beginning of August during Summer vacation and just waited till now, since Bernard season was back
CW: GN! Reader, Pure Fluff 
You two are complete opposites. You being the upbeat, positive, sweet one. Him being the sarcastic, grumpy, overthinker one. But opposites attract! You do occasionally have a few sarcasm battles with each other though.
Him being 2 inches taller than you.
I feel like he only uses nicknames when it’s just the two of you. Ex: Love, Sweetheart, dear, darling, (very simple but sickly sweet).
You use a few sweet ones too, but you also like to make fun of him sometimes so Mr. perfectionist, and grumpy it is.
If you use a sweet one in public, he will get embarrassed.
“I told you not to use that in public!” 
You smile and laugh mischievously.
“Seriously, this is a work environment! Be professional!”
You lean in and kiss his cheek.
“Whatever you say sweetie.”
You walk away leaving behind a blushing annoyed Bernard.
Having snowball fights. 
Him winning and you insisting it was a tie.
Making snow angels together.
Sitting by the fire and cuddling while drinking hot chocolate.
Ice skating together. That boy is one great skater.
You help him have more fun.
Stealing his hat (Doesn’t matter if it was on or off his head).
“Hey Y/N, have you seen-”
He didn’t even bother trying to get it back, you just looked so adorable.
Oh, and when you see him genuinely smile or laugh for the first time-
“Hey, love?”
Bernard waves his hand in front of your face.
You were just so lovestruck!
“Oh! Um I just never thought- you should do that more often.”
Being close with Charlie.
Coming with Bernard whenever he visits him.
Charlie looks up to you two.
He was so happy when you two got together.
And Bernard was so embarrassed-
Calming him down when he gets angry.
“It’s okay Bernard, we can figure it out together.”
You give him a comforting hug, linking your arms around his waist, leaning your head on his collarbone.
He hugs you back, puts his head in the crook of your neck, and sighs.
Kisses are full of love and adoration.
Him letting you play with his curly hair.
You two have definitely kissed under the mistletoe before (Scott & Charlie 100% had something to do with it).
Maybe when you two were just friends you only gave him a kiss on the forehead.
(Probably really blushes whenever you kiss him on the forehead, since it reminds him of that moment).
But when you became a couple.
You two had the sweetest most beautiful kiss ever!
Scott/Santa thinks you are one of the best things that have happened to Bernard.
He’s less uptight and seems to be happier at work now that you’re in his life.
When cuddling, if you are facing each other, your head will be in his chest and his head will be on top of yours.
Holding you like the teddy bear you are <3
If you’re spooning he’s most likely the big spoon.
But sometimes when he’s had a rough stressful day *cough* Curtis bugging him.
He loves for you to be holding him.
It’s very comforting and gives him the hope that tomorrow will be better.
Getting him to take breaks (ones that are longer than 5 minutes lol).
And possibly a vacation. 
Might take a lot of an effect but it will be worth it.
“But Bernard-”
“No! Too much needs to be done!”
“Christmas is 360 days away! Can’t you spare 15 minutes?”
“I-”
He looks down and sees you with pleating eyes, and a small pout.
“Fine.”
You smile wide and you give him a great big hug.
“Thank you.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”
He blushes and smiles ever so slightly. 
He always tends to over work himself.
Sometimes he falls asleep in his office.
You'll come home and he won’t be there.
So, you head over to the workshop and open his door.
You find him slumped over his desk with his pen still in his hand.
You smile and walk over to him, removing the pen from his grasp.
You slightly nudge his shoulder.
“Bernard honey, you can finish that in the morning. Let’s go home.”
You make him eat a little bit of dinner before he goes to bed.
He falls asleep in your arms <3
You just care and love this elf so much, and as stubborn as he may be you wouldn’t want it any other way.
I really enjoyed writing this at the time, so I hoped you enjoyed reading them.
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peteneems · 6 months
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babygirl-olympics · 6 months
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imhkenobi · 2 years
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my beloved 🫶🏾
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everydayschristmas · 7 months
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classic 😎❄️
Hot chocolate by the fireplace while this plays. You can't go wrong.
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the-ghost-bracket · 5 months
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Arthur Christmas propaganda:
"Arthur spends the entire movie just trying to make Christmas good for everyone amd cares about the little things so deeply "
"He wasn't the Santa heir, but his spirit of Christmas was so strong he convinced the whole family he was the best Santa, without even trying to be Santa"
"He's so sweet! 💕💕💕💕 He literally went to the ends of the earth in a shitty old sleigh with a small ass team just to get the last gift delivered to ONE girl who's gift was forgotten when everybody else at Santa's workshop let her gift be forgotten. 😭"
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lizardsfromspace · 6 months
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So in The Santa Clause is Santa a kind of virus, or is he a tulpa? How do new holidays come into existence? Is it from belief? How many people had to believe in Santa for the North Pole to come into existence? What or who was there before it was erased? Or is it a more ancient entity, hopping from body to body? Did he always exist like this 20th century depiction, or did he used to embody wild man myths of pagan winter celebrations? It's strongly implied that no Santa before him lasted more than a year, so it's likely that many times, someone is only Santa for a few hours before dying & there's more than one a night. This is America so we have to assume at least a few, potentially most, Santas have been shot as intruders, so in The Santa Clause universe there's more than one child who witnessed Santa coming through their temporarily eldritch chimney, only to get shot dead by their dad, and then witnessed their dad turning into Santa, screaming "hohoho KILL ME hohoho" to their sobbing wife as they grew extra hair and fat and ate cookies, as depicted in the 1994 film The Santa Clause
Or do they remember? Everybody treats Santa as a laughable concept, but they all get presents of unclear origin every Christmas! Do their minds refuse to process the impossibility? Is everyone in the Santa Clause universe in a constant state of denial that's on the verge of tearing their minds apart? How many people are in asylums for insisting they saw Santa and he's real, and do their doctors pause, consider that unknown present last year, before dismissing it, bc they must dismiss it to carry on, lest they, too, be thrown in the asylums? But it's not everyone bc Santa from the Santa Clause only gives presents to kids who celebrate Christmas. Why? Is it a personal choice driven by hatred of other religions, or are his powers bound somehow? If so, by who? Which brings us back to our question - virus or tulpa?
Anyway, did you remember Mrs. Claus from the sequels is Juliet from Lost? Wow!
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hext00ns · 5 months
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Curtis’ first job is being assistant head elf. His second job is keeping Bernard’s blood pressure as low as humanly possible (he is not as good at the second job as he is the first)
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foxevxid · 5 months
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someone write more fanfiction for that damn elf
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