#sam's demon blood addiction arc

[flugame-mp3]

it's wild to me that dean is always so shocked at children of monsters, especially relatively well-adjusted adjusted ones à la garth and the werewolf family in 9x12... like the concept of a second generation werewolf baffled him. but is he not a direct mirror of that?? are he and sam not the second generation of a way of life that ostracizes one from society and often results in premature death (dare i say... see: 15x20)? like hunters and monsters are at odds, sure, but in a way that just makes them interesting foils to each other, meaning that he's a mirror to the very thing he can hardly believe exists. very... dean.

#idk. just a strange look into how he thinks of himself and the things he hunts maybe #having thoughts about the winchester bros' childhood(s). yeah. #it feels like a look into the fact that he really did internalize the things john taught him. good writing. my favorite ghost in the show i #john winchester haunting the narrative #like it feels like a continuation of the whole 'i could never have anything in common with a monster' thing that he had going on during #sam's demon blood addiction arc #mmmm. dean you have changed so much but you never change. god #spn #the brothers winchester #dean #theo.txt #and im sure im not the first one to have thought of this but god these characters make me insane

[sammygender]

‘sam has made unforgivable mistakes’ shut up ‘sams redemption arc in s5’ shut up ‘sam’s way of making up for his one evil mistake in s4’ SHUT UP ‘sam’s ending in swan song perfectly redeems his character’ SHUT THE FUCK UP i hope you freaks who condemn sam for like. being an addict and in an abusive relationship and prioritising saving the world in a way that would’ve worked based on the information he had during s4 die. this isn’t about sam haters in general cause wtv apparently he gets pretty shit later on i haven’t seen past s5 yet but it is about people who act like sam somehow needed to repent of all his sins by the end of s5 and being tortured forever is sooooo the #perfect ending to his arc. i hate yall

#u people see someone whos been traumatised violated and manipulated their whole life never allowed a shred of autonomy their entire life #spied on and controlled behind the scenes. someone whos believed he’s evil and guilty and wrong way beofre he ever did anything bad at all #someone who’s biggest crime was trusting the wrong demon (and ig also the killings but whatever) and drinking demon blood #WHICH BY THE WAY. HAVING BEEN IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND BEING AN ADDICT ISNT A MORAL FAILING. U FUCKING WEIRDOS. #and go. Yeah the perfect ending to his arc is dying so he can finally be good🎀 #you are all deeply unserious people #oliver talks #spn #sam winchester

[enobariasteeth]

thinking about how good supernatural could’ve been if it’s original target audience wasn’t toxically masculine men and if it took itself seriously in later seasons

#think of the emotional potential #give Jensen ackles a chance to have a deeply emotional role #he gave SO much to Dean #dean is a very tragic character but imagine how much more depth we could’ve gotten #if the show didn’t pride itself on stupid ‘no chick flick moments’ #GIVE US A CHICK FLICK MKMENT #I want to see them screaming and crying and throwing up #I want to see them dealing with their trauma (healthy or not) #because we do see them do that #Dean especially (drinking gambling women) #but it’s all played off as ‘haha look at him go what a cool dude’ #instead of the potential it could’ve had #because his whole personality is 100% a coping mechanism #the only ways we see them canonically deal with their trauma is breaking stuff #which also could’ve had potential if it didn’t magically fix all their problems #sams spiral arc where he gets addicted to demon blood and starts losing himself could’ve been so good #I’ve been listening to preachers daughter so now I need everything to have devastating symbolism yk? #supernatural

[ishades]

I miss early seasons sam come back!

#idk I have a lot of thoughts on his and deans relationship #and him and uriel because Uriel deciding to say fuck all angels who oppose me is very similar to #sams demon blood arc imo #i think the saddest thing about Sam is hell always be a brother before he’s a person #He’s Uriel he’s lucifer he’s abel! He’s so many people!!! #like it or not sam is his fathers son but first and foremost he’s a brother #part of a set. the goofy kid brother who Dean has to take care of #he’s the college student with an older brother who he doesn’t contact regularly but it doesn’t matter to him because this is his life now! #he wants to do what makes him happy he wants to be normal so bad #*bad #but he’s John winchesters boy and he handles loss just the same as his old man #like… idk how people are confused that he struggled with addiction #digital digital i wanna get digital

[wickedwitchofthesouth]

In a perfect world they would have written a plotline where Dean becomes addicted to angel grace because it was the only thing that keeps the effects of the mark of cain at bay.

In a perfect world it would have been the perfect parallel to Sam's demon blood junkie arc

In a perfect world, Cas would have been Deans Ruby

IN A PERFECT WORLD THATS HOW THEY WOULDVE GOTTEN TOGTHER

#but we dont live in a perfect world #we live in a horrible terrible fucked up world were they all died and nothing is real #i need someone to write this #supernatural #castiel #dean winchester #spn #destiel #bbc merlin #sam winchester

[suncaptor]

one thing I do think is important to talk about in supernatural is also how ableist it is, not that this detracts at all from the racism. It manifests both in how it treats things such as addiction (demon blood Sam) or how the arc regarding psychosis is handled along with plenty of other examples, but also sort of the base make up of the show.

Many many of the supernatural beings in the show are either 1.) Genetic anomalies that must be killed (shapeshifter, rugaru, etc) or 2.) Humans who at some point changed due to what is clearly an analogy for a type of illness/virus (vampire, werewolf, etc). This is like clearly then supporting eugenics! Like this draw is not at all hard to make. They speak in terms of cures.

#spn #incoherents #supernatural #ableism #.💌

[italwayshadtobeyou]

For SPN week 2023: Day 4: Fav' story arc(s): Sam's addiction to demon blood.

#spnweek #spn #spnedit #supernatural #supernaturaledit #sam winchester #gif warning #mine

[character-of-all-time]

Now that the submissions are closed, were there any funny submissions that topped the previously stated funny submissions?

I might end up publishing the full response list to browse through at your leisure and so that someone else can seek out the hee hoo funny ha has rather than making myself go through all 1522 again, but I would like to highlight a few submissions that stuck with me:

character: Sam Winchester

from: supernatural

why?: oh COME ON. ur gonna make me defend sam fucking winchester as the most character of all time?? he literally has bangs. he died at 23. he died at 26. he died a lot of other times too but those are the most important ones. he's jesus and he's the antichrist and he gets placed on a visual crucifix too many times to count. he's an addict and he's a christian and god is making his life miserable on a personal level. he is wholeheartedly convinced that there are other people who "have it worse" than him (he was tortured by satan for centuries). again he HAS bangs. he's been possessed too many times to ever feel like his body is his own. he's in a constant cycle of being beaten down and KNOWING he shouldn't get back up, and not wanting to get back up, and getting back up anyway like a kicked puppy who thinks maybe this time they won't get kicked. never ever gives up but in a sad and pathetic way that makes u feel vaguely nauseous. he's psychic. he bought a ring for his girlfriend while they were still in college. he went to stanford. he's unclean in the biblical sense but he prays every night. he had a queer allegory arc spanning multiple seasons that people ignore so they can claim he's cishet. he totally fucked a 300-year-old witch while studying under her to become a witch himself. everyone he has ever loved is dead and he knows it's his fault. he spends the first few decades of his life angry -- SO angry -- at everything he's been put through, full of rage at the things he's suffered and the people who caused them. he is punished for this fury, taught to never be angry again, and after a while he just lies down and takes it. he is a serial killer and on the fbi's most wanted list. he uses "low sodium" as an insult. he's a vegetarian. he never drives his father's car. he has demon blood flowing through his veins and his best friend is a literal biblical angel. he's an abomination. he thinks that hope is kind of the whole point. he has BANGS. he killed his brother several times over, and he destroyed the world to bring his brother back to life a few times too. he spent time in a psych ward. he thinks he is terribly hard to love. his mother destroyed his life before he was even born and he still calls her "mama." he died at 23. he was kicked out of the house when he was 18, and then was kicked out of basically everywhere else for the rest of his life. his only family locked him in a panic room and left him to die. he forgave them for that because he doesn't know how to do anything but forgive. he's got bangs. anyway

what do you want?: u KNOW what i want. if my best friend sam doesn't win this bracket i'm crashing my car into the world's tallest and thickest tree

--------------

character: jesse pinkman

from: breaking bad

why?: Well.Well. i. so. hes THE character okay he was created in gods eyes only to be sculpted and changed by the wrath of satan (or the other way around). Its jesse pinkman. have you ever watched 5 seasons of a grown man with cancer abusing another grown man in order to support his family who hate him because of the way hes trying to support them (drugdealing)?No? well i need you to and then come back to me. jesses relationship with the aforementioned Grown man with cancer (walter white) is so multidimensional you could refer to jesse as walters affair, student, victim, partner in crime, son figure etc and it would be RIGHT because they are all encompassing and fucked up. and jesse loses everything and he cries and hes so emotional but he PREVAILS. he prevails and he precedes walter and all the toxically masculine men who hated him, who convinced him was less than who he was. and the dog motif!!!!! hes a loyal dog but his owner has been slowly feeding him poison, to break him down slowly, and its killing him so he BITES because it hurts and they all talk about the rabid dog he is, how badly the owner needs to put him down. and then his owner gives him away to much worse men, owners who wont feed him the poison slowly, but will beat and use him relentlessly. and then his old owner is going to die and he knows it and he needs to secured his reputation and put everything in place. he saves the dog and kills the dogs new owners. he BEGS for his dog to kill him, to kill him like he had done to the dog. but this dog is not like any of his owners, hw will never be. so he barks and says that he should do it himself and he RUNS. hes crying and whimpering but hes not getting beaten or poisoned anymore, hes a free dog and its up to him to make his own future without the influence of evil owners. THAT'S jesse Pinkman. hes the bride of heisenburg hes the dog motif and he loves and loves and protects animals and kids because he couldn't protect himself and he wins with tears in his eyes. um also hes trans so ^ hasnt watched this show in like 7 months i have mo idea what im talking about

what do you want?: one billion dollars

------

who: Victor frankenstein

from: Mary shelley frankenstein

why?: I don't remember anything about this book except for the incredible and relatable line of 'I raveged an oatcake' cos God man me too

what do you want?: An oatcake

-----

who: sphagnum moss

from: real life

why: Love that bitch. They are light and hold moisture well. and they also form peat bogs when they die which is swag

what do you want?: To be turned into a zebra mussel and sleep in a Marimo moss ball and not have to worry about relationships or taxes

-------

who: Guy Montag

from: Fahrenheit 451

why?: he kills his boss with fire which i think is pretty cool and something we can all aspire to. i also want him to be in an online popularity contest because i want ray bradburys head to explode from beyond the grave

what do you want?: prove life after death so i can destroy ray bradbury’s soul

#askance #supernatural #sam winchester #breaking bad #jesse pinkman #frankenstein #victor frankenstein #guy montag #fahrenheit 451 #sphagnum moss

[finalgirlsamwinchester]

what are your thoughts on samruby?

thank you for sending this! and OH BOY i wrote a lot. i'm so sorry. i'm putting it under a cut for everyone's sanity.

see, the thing about samruby to me is the religiosity of it all. it's about a victim unknowingly initiated into a cult. it's about a holy lamb being raised for slaughter.

firstly i can't discuss it without spilling my guts over ruby as a character!! i saw a meta the other day (and i wish i'd reblogged it bc i can't find it again) calling ruby the most devout character in supernatural. and they're right! she is! her arc is about devotion and keeping faith. she's a direct narrative foil to cas, who falls down the path of doubt and experiences a crisis of faith. For ruby, her god is lucifer, and she'll accept all persecution and undergo every trial she has to in order to fulfil her mission as his servant. and she does! she succeeds up to her death! (whereas cas fails, and lives)

she doesn't see grooming and manipulating sam as an act of corruption. it's about purification. (and we all know how sam feels about purity, aha) for ruby, the demon blood drinking is a matter of cleansing sam of human imperfection, for the purposes of presenting lucifer his ideal vessel. because the thing about sam is that he's a liminal figure. he's as human as he is monstrous - and from a demonic perspective, wouldn't his humanness be considered the infection?

the way ruby preys on sam also has a definite maternal tilt to it. from as early as s3 (like the way she says 'that's my boy!' to him in 3x04? like dean does in 1x11?). she calls him 'sammy' in a way that mirrors dean, but also evokes maternal warmth. just as dean in season 1 functions as a protector and guide for sam when he brings him back into the hunting fold, ruby does so for sam in dean's absence. sam's grief and vulnerability presents her an opportunity to take on the role of carer and mentor. she'll teach him how to use his powers! she'll guide him in what he needs to do, while he's so lost in his own suffering. sure she provides warmth and affection - but more importantly, she directs sam towards a mission, a cause for good.

she's an incredible character to pair off with sam, a character full of hope and belief that his faith might amount to something (i'm thinking of the start of s11 here - sam desperate to believe his prayers are being answered by god. only to discover it was lucifer all along) he wants to be like joan of arc - he wants the voice of heaven commanding and guiding him along a path of heroism. it's his hope and faith that make him vulnerable.

ruby takes on sam like she's a cult recruiter preying on a victim! like if you go through the stages of cult indoctrination: deception (check! she tricks him into breaking the final seal by killing lilith!), isolation (check! sam having to keep his activities w ruby a secret, driving a wedge between him and dean, eventuating in their separation), induced dependency (check! a blood addiction!). by the end of it, he's left abandoned by his loved ones, alone and entirely reliant on her and the purpose she's given him.

but luckily - sam is a character who hates being controlled above all else, so he does not have his Midsommar (2019) May Queen moment. even when he does let lucifer in, he does so as a sleeper agent. he holds onto his independent spirit to the end :")

tldr; ruby loves sam as a devotee loves their holy mission. sam begrudgingly accepts ruby, not as the divine guidance he wants, but the only one that'll speak to him.

#samruby #the other day i was thinking. oh sam is the kinda character who WOULD accidentally get drawn into a cult #but then writing this post. you fool!! that's literally what happened in canon w. samruby and the demon blood arc! #i could write a giant essay on sam + purity + demon blood drinking + martyrdom...but that's a different post... #(also big sidebar: can we also talk about how sam and cas are mirrors of one another. their parallel struggles w faith and goodness) #dean is excluded from this convo bc he is in fact. a hard and fast atheist. god bless #a man so full of doubt he causes an angel to fall lmaooo #my meta #asks #j.txt

[mothgardens]

it is 2am and i am feeling so much sam winchester love rn so here is a list of taylor swift songs i think resonate with him:

1. Anti-Hero

I feel as tho all the lyrics work towards his character.

Mr. Samuel “It’s me, Hi, I’m the problem it’s me… everybody agrees,” Winchester

I should not be left to my own devices -> Dean constantly implies that Sam shouldn’t be left to figure things out on his own. He does this so much that Sam actually confronts him about it, multiple times.

I wake up screaming from dreaming -> Sam used to wake up from his visions freaked the hell out.

The second verse is also very fitting; he always felt like a freak or monster compared to everyone else.

2. Clean

DEMON BLOOD !!!!!!

I think it works really well for his addiction arc because the song is about toxic relationships (aka RUBY).

The drought being the worst -> Being locked in Bobby’s panic room.

The flowers that we grown together died of thirst -> The powers that grew and developed during his addiction and slowly disappeared when he was sobering.

I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing -> Sam was shouting and banging for hours down in the panic room and no one came to check on him until he was quiet.

Ten months older, I wont give in. Now that i’m clean, I’m never gonna risk it -> He never went back

3. Nothing New

Honestly, the whole reason this song is on the list is because of the lyric:

How can a person know everything at 18, but nothing at 22 -> Sam left for Stanford at 18. That was his first taste of freedom; it was his first time deciding something for himself. He was his own person. He had finally escaped. But, then at 22, Dean came and brought him back in. Jess dies. Everything feels lost again.

In general, I think Sam has lost of teenage girl vibes to him tho. This is probably self projection, but I think its true and this is MY analysis so <3.

4. My Tears Ricochet

This song is about Sam and John’s Stanford fight, and general dynamics that they share.

This one is going to get it’s own in depth, dedicated post <3 but some highlights are:

Even on my worst day, did i deserve, all the hell you gave me -> Sam was a child. No matter how arrogant or frustrating he could be, John should have never been so harsh on him. Telling your kid to never come back just because he wants to go to college is INSANE.

And I can go anywhere I want, just not home -> THIS LINE IS SO AHHHHHHH SAMMY.

Cursing my name, wishing i stayed -> John. John. John. Cursing Sam to never return, while simultaneously wishing he had never left.

Cause when I’d fight you used to tell me I was brave -> Parallel, John telling Sam he being brave on a hunt VS John condescendingly saying Sam was being brave for standing up to him.

You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same -> John realizing that Sam might have to die if nothing changes. John giving that responsibility to Dean by giving his life for Dean’s; selfless selfishness.

5. Mirrorball

Mr. Samuel “And when I break, it’s in a million pieces” Winchester

I’m still on that tightrope, I’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me -> Sam continuously tries to do his best under every circumstance. Even though most of the people around him have such little faith in him. He won’t stop trying.

And I’m still a believer, but I don’t know why -> His faith is God and the stereotypical Christian religion in general throughout the series fascinates me. He has very little reason to keep his faith, but he does. Even in later seasons, I think it was s11, when he prays and believes that Lucifer’s visions are actually messages from God.

I’ve never been a natural, all I do is try try try -> Sam doesn’t actually know what he is doing. He uses his training, but that only can get you so far in mental battles with Lucifer or physical battles with God. He does what he thinks is right. He just wants to help.

6. This Is Me Trying

This is also in the works of developing its own post. Highlights include:

I didn’t know if you’d care if i came back, i have a lot of regrets about that -> Sam never got to know if Dean wanted him back. All that time spent at Stanford he had to wonder if his father and brother actually missed him or not.

Could’ve followed my fears all the way down -> This just screams Lucifer trauma to me

THEY TOLD ME ALL MY CAGES WERE MENTAL, SO I GOT WASTED LIKE ALL MY POTENTIAL -> *violently screams and shakes* The visions, Demon blood, Hallucifer, literally anytime Sam is struggling it is brushed off as him being too worked up about it. Dean literally COMPLAINED to Bobby about how much work it was that Sam was mentally ill. LIKE DUDE.

AND MY WORDS SHOOT TO KILL WHEN IM MAD, I HAVE A LOT OF REGRETS ABOUT THAT -> Sam does say shit that is hurtful. He does shit that is bad. It’s usually out of frustration from someone else’s actions towards him. AKA it’s usually towards Dean, when Dean belittles him.

pouring out my heart to a stranger, BUT I DIDNT POUR THE WHISKEY -> Sam vs Dean (this is NOT me belittling Dean’s alcoholism bc i get he has an issue)

That this is me trying, AT LEAST IM TRYING -> Again, Sam is just doing his best.

And it’s hard to be at a party when I when i feel like an open wound -> Sam has to just behave and go through his life normally even when he is struggling with abandonment, addiction, 180 years of every abuse imaginable and unimaginable, guilt, and just so much suffering.

It ’s hard to be anywhere when all i want is you, you’re a flashback -> Sam’s feelings about Jess. I constantly think about that scene in the impala when he tells Dean that he still thinks about her. It had been like twelve or more years. Its so painful.

—

please excuse my typos

i am yet but just a girl

<3

#im so insane about sam #i lovelovelove his character #i don’t understand people who don’t #i am such a sam fan i cannot understand hating him #supernatural #sam winchester #spn #castiel #please talk to me about supernatural #dean winchester #sabriel #sastiel #chuck shurley #sammy #sam winchester to me is pspsps to cats #sam spn #sam antis are crazy <3 #sam and dean #taylor swift and supernatural #sam girl #sam posts #sam winchester hurts me #jared padalecki

[flugame-mp3]

it's wild to me that dean is always so shocked at children of monsters, especially relatively well-adjusted adjusted ones à la garth and the werewolf family in 9x12... like the concept of a second generation werewolf baffled him. but is he not a direct mirror of that?? are he and sam not the second generation of a way of life that ostracizes one from society and often results in premature death (dare i say... see: 15x20)? like hunters and monsters are at odds, sure, but in a way that just makes them interesting foils to each other, meaning that he's a mirror to the very thing he can hardly believe exists. very... dean.

#idk. just a strange look into how he thinks of himself and the things he hunts maybe #having thoughts about the winchester bros' childhood(s). yeah. #it feels like a look into the fact that he really did internalize the things john taught him. good writing. my favorite ghost in the show i #john winchester haunting the narrative #like it feels like a continuation of the whole 'i could never have anything in common with a monster' thing that he had going on during #sam's demon blood addiction arc #mmmm. dean you have changed so much but you never change. god #spn #the brothers winchester #dean #theo.txt #and im sure im not the first one to have thought of this but god these characters make me insane

[shatterdome-underscore]

Gale: I have a magic addiction and I need to consume magic items every so often to function

Me: wow that's so like Sam Winchester's demon blood addiction arc and is somehow both more and less silly at the same time

#baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #i noticed similarities between gale and someone i know so now i do like him but the idea of romancing him gives me the ick #sam winchester #remember the demon blood stuff that was whack #spn

[kiki-strike]

10 characters 10 fandoms 10 (ish) tags!

thanks @transboyzuko and @fanfic-gremlin-ft-trauma for tagging me ^-^

1. Azula ATLA - she’s a tragic villain she’s a narrative foil she’s a style icon she’s a mean lesbian what more could you want (a redemption arc lol)

2. Geralt The Witcher - AUTISTIC KING i too mostly just talk to animals and myself. i picked up his “hmm” and it got me in trouble for a while until my mom watched it and realized i was just unconsciously copying him.

3. Jinora LOK - i haven’t seen all of LOK so im hoping she doesn’t turn evil or smth but. hooray for little girls who see Creatures by themselves in the woods and are probably hyperlexic and are smarter and know more than all the adults around them !!!!!

4. Sam Winchester Supernatural - he got out of his toxic family situation and then he Went Back. watched his brother die 111 times in one episode. got addicted to demon blood to save the world. literally born to be possessed by the devil. chronic third wheel

5. Charlie IASIP - nuff said

6. Eddie Brock Venom - hated big pharma so hard it made him a divorcee. really hot ex who i’m in love with and so is he. cool murderous parasite best friend. lobster tank enjoyer.

7. Beth Good Girls - i regularly dream about her despite not having seen the show in years. that’s my wife. badass perfect housewife who robs grocery stores and launders money in her spare time.

8. Bean Disenchantment - hooray for teenage alcoholics. has a personal demon meant to make her life hell and the demon ends up making it better because she’s just that miserable. “this is the bathtub, where Bean makes her bathtub gin. and this is the shower, where Bean makes her shower gin.” killed two fiancées in the first 20 minutes of the show. canon wlw.

9. Scarlet Witch Marvel - THEY HATE TO SEE A GIRLBOSS WINNINGGGGGGG

10. Bender Futurama - his name is a pun. his face looks like 😬. occasionally behaves like a toddler/dog. unyielding devotion to homoerotic friendship. lives in a closet. was god once. alloaro.

i’ll tag: @ozais-lobotomist @waterfire1848 @tommyssupercoolblog @juniperhillpatient @kyoshigirl @autistic-katara @sukidude @averageinsomniac

[angelsdean]

The other thing about Sam's bloodfreak era that I don't see discussed very often is that even with the demon blood, it doesn't seem like his powers were innate and in fact were specifically tied to Azazel, because he doesn't actually seem to have any powers in season 3 at all after Azazel dies (no prophetic dreams, no telekinesis, etc) beyond maybe being immune to some of Lilith's stuff in the finale (which, given what we now know her endgame plan was, could have been a ruse anyway). Not only does he not have powers until he starts actively consuming demon blood as an adult, the powers he gains FROM the demon blood are different from the ones he got from Azazel, and he never really seems to exhibit those original powers again after season 2. I think the implication that Sam's powers were never innate to him even with the demon blood and were more like the boon from a warlock pact w/Azazel is something that gets wildly overlooked when discussing the demon blood arc and how the brothers both handle it.

oh yea definitely !!! i like vaguely remembered something abt how his powers seem to disappear completely after azazel dies (either from a discord discussion or another post) and i was gonna mention it in my post but s3 is a bit hazy in my mind rn so i wasn't completely sure abt that. but yea his powers just are not innate in any reading of the text. they're clearly presented as a result of the demon blood (first from azazel dosing him and the other special children as babies, and then from ruby in s4). there's nothing inherently monstrous abt sam !!! thee only thing sam has that sets him apart from the other special children is the lucifer bloodline and even that doesn't make him evil or bad it's just that genetically he's more likely to be able to hold an archangel, same as dean and adam w/ michael ? being the lucifer vessel doesn't give him any special powers or make him more monstrous than anyone else. yet so many discussions of sam's "bloodfreak" era and the special children psychic powers arc seem to focus on these things being innate powers that set sam apart and make him monstrous and Different when the narrative itself shows that those powers and abilities stem from substances being introduced into sam and esp all the stuff w/ ruby is framed as a metaphor for addiction and ruby being his supplier / enabler. imo sam projects a lot of his fears of being innately bad or impure onto others and from his POV he thinks he IS a monster and inherently bad. while from outside perspectives like dean and bobby and cas they see him as struggling with an addiction and making choices that are leading him down a dangerous path so of course they're going to try to stop that but sam sees it as an attack and rejection of who he is because once again he believes he's monstrous and that there's something inherently wrong with him but that's not the case.

anyways, i'm def gonna keep an eye out for the differences between azazel's powers and his powers from the regular demon blood on this rewatch bc i'm fascinated by the idea that they're completely different things and that sam's psychic powers died w/ azazel bc he and the special children were drawing on azazel's own powers or something.

#replies #sam studies #mymeta

[castielsparkle]

i am constantly saying this i Know. i know. But literally unfortunately they wrote sams actions/emotions during demon blood addiction arc SOOOOO fucking well. unfortunately

#cas.txt #watching media #i keep having to pause because its too real

[ruinedsam]

Wait, I just thought of something. Abbadon decides that if Sam won’t take the throne, she will because Crowley is awful for her. But, she has been talking to Sam while trying to get him to take an interest in being King of Hell and finally says, “well, if you won’t do it, I will.” Sam just wants to finish his lunch in peace and agrees more out of the hope this will make people stop asking him to take the throne than anything else. Abbadon asks if he’ll support her, because Sam Winchester’s approval actually carries a lot of weight in part due to the fact that the throne might technically be his via Azazel and Lucifer and also everyone is lowkey terrified of him due to him being both a good hunter and that time period when he could snack on one of them and murder the others around with his mind, and Sam agrees because he just wants someone competent in charge as issues with the ruler always spill out to the rest of the world and he thinks Crowley won’t be able to make the demons truly accept him. But Dean is out there supporting Crowley, so it’s Winchester vs Winchester. I’m not sure how the Trials and the aftermath fit here, but if we assume Gadreel still occurred, he’s kicked out way earlier and I want it to be because Abbadon told Sam he had an angel as a passenger and that’s the last thing she expected from him after the stories she’s heard and her own observations: Sam freezes and she realizes he didn’t know. So things progress like they did in canon regarding the Gadreel aftermath, but this means that the Crowley/Dean vs Abbadon/Sam situation is all happening when things are already pretty raw between Sam and Dean. The fights between Sam and Dean over their respective support are brutal; Dean still takes on the Mark of Cain here, only there’s a real concern throughout this that Dean is going to relieve the Cain-Abel story. Sam has to leave for his own safety, and Abbadon (or Meg) eventually finds out and insists he stays with them. Sam more or less goes “whatever” and it’s cheaper than staying in a hotel and he really can’t stand seeing Dean right now—and if they wanted to kill him, they’ve had plenty of opportunities so far—so Sam is now living with at least one demon. Dean sneers at him about this, about how he’s picked a demon over his brother before and Dean should’ve seen this and making at least one crude comment about Sam’s addiction and if he’s sleeping with and drinking from this demon the way he was with Ruby, which Sam denies. Dean is about to make what is no doubt a derogatory comment, and Abbadon cuts him off by airily saying that Sam is actually safer with her than he is with his own brother. Throughout all of this, it is just a repeat of that constant issue that Sam first sensed as a kid but only found the real cause for after Cold Oak: he is Azazel’s son in the eyes of the demons, and apparently in Dean’s eyes as well. I’m not sure how the fallout goes, but I desperately want there to be more about Sam’s demon blood and I think we could’ve had a fun example of it during the Abbadon-Crowley arc

I only watched season 9 one time because it made me so mad so I don't really remember why/how/to what extent Dean teamed up with Crowley, but hell's internal politics really aren't his business and I don't see why anyone would care about his opinions lol he's just some dude. I really want Abbadon or maybe Meg tell him that in the most patronizing way possible, adding that Sam's the important one.

Anyway I really love this because Sam needs people who haven't been sanctioned by Dean in his corner and the fact that they're all demons is something that would torment Sam (which I find very enjoyable because I'm a sicko).

#ask #meg calls sam brother au