#real-life vs online

[viiprincipium]

Dangers of Social Media: The Link to Sadness and Depression

Social media, designed as a platform for connection, has become an inseparable part of our lives. We scroll, we like, we comment, we share. Yet, beneath the surface of memes and status updates lies a more complex web of emotions, including spikes in dopamine, our brain's reward chemical. But when these dopamine spikes fade, many users are left feeling emptier than before, and in some cases, this spirals into feelings of sadness and depression.

Understanding the Dopamine Effect

Dopamine is often referred to as the "feel good" neurotransmitter. It's released during pleasurable situations, stimulating feelings of pleasure and reward. With every like, comment, or share, dopamine is released, making the experience of using social media inherently rewarding. This is similar to the gratification felt when eating a delicious meal, receiving a compliment, or even gambling. Over time, our brains begin to seek out these frequent dopamine spikes, creating an addictive loop.

The Downward Spiral

The problem arises when the initial euphoria from these dopamine spikes starts to wane. The highs are soon replaced with lows. As we continue to engage on platforms that offer selective highlights of people's lives, the inevitable comparison begins. This “compare and despair” effect can lead to feelings of inadequacy, envy, and low self-esteem. After all, everyone else seems happier, more successful, and more fulfilled, right?

Moreover, the quality of our connections on these platforms can sometimes feel shallow. The genuine, deep connections we, as humans, require for emotional health can't be replaced by virtual thumbs-ups or heart emojis.

Breaking Free from the Dopamine Loop

So, how do we break free from this cycle and use social media healthily?

Digital Detox: Start with a short digital detox. It can be as brief as a weekend or as long as a month. Use this time to engage in activities that nourish your mind and body, like reading, exercising, or spending quality time with loved ones.

Set Time Limits: Once you reintroduce social media, establish boundaries. Set specific times of the day when you'll check your apps, and limit the total time you spend scrolling.

Turn Off Notifications: Each ping can be a distraction and a pull back into the dopamine loop. By turning off non-essential notifications, you can decide when to engage, rather than being at the beck and call of every update.

Curate Your Feed: Follow pages, accounts, or groups that uplift you, inspire you, or truly resonate with your interests. Unfollow or mute accounts that make you feel anxious, inadequate, or negative.

Engage Mindfully: Instead of mindlessly scrolling, engage with intention. Comment genuinely on posts, message friends to catch up, and remember that it's okay not to document every moment.

Seek Genuine Connection: Remember, human connection is vital. Instead of texting or commenting, perhaps make a call or meet up in person. Real-world interactions provide emotional depth that online platforms can't match.

Remember Real Life: It's essential to understand that social media showcases selective realities. People often share their highlights, not their everyday struggles. Recognizing this can reduce feelings of inadequacy.

Seek Help if Needed: If you find that your social media use is negatively impacting your mental well-being, don't hesitate to seek professional guidance. A therapist or counselor can offer coping strategies and insights tailored to you.

In conclusion, while social media has its perks, it's crucial to recognize its potential pitfalls. By understanding the dopamine-driven highs and lows it can introduce, we can navigate these platforms more healthily, ensuring they enhance our lives rather than detract from our well-being.

#social media dangers #dopamine effects #digital detox #mental health #compare and despair #online comparison #setting boundaries online #genuine connection #social media addiction #curating social feeds #mindful engagement #real-life vs online #seeking therapy #emotional wellbeing #social media and depression

[pawbeanies]

every time i think about getting on dating websites i remember that at some point i would have 2 explain The Dogblog to them and i immediately stop

#like. the chuu in my brain who is on here is very different from the chuu in my real life who has like a job if that makes sense #chuu real life vs chuu online life are two different people and i dont know how to like. how would i. tell people that #whoch is to say that chuu real life is a FRAUD chuu online life is real and cute #neither r like good to date im sure. or to have some sort of relationship with. but whatevs

[tinfairies]

Me: wants a switch sex partner irl so I can get more into the BDSM scene

Also me: a paranoid shut in that gets nauseated just thinking about talking to other people irl

#tin talks #I am definitely very different in real life #Online persona vs irl persona is like day and night

[dwn024]

um

i'm not dead

(despite my best efforts)

sorry for being gone for so long

although i guess since my queue never stopped running it didn't really look any different except there were no original posts so you couldn't really

tell a difference whether i was here or not

but to the people who were concerned enough to send messages and um

think that i was successfully dead

thank you for the concern + i'm really really sorry for not being back sooner to reassure anybody about it

i['m really horrifically sorry for being unable to say anything sooner

&& i would um

prefer not to talk about anything that happened or why i Was gone for so long cuz i'm not necessarily like

better

but i'm definitely alive

and i guess back now

even though. the queue really made it look like i never left

(i should maybe consider tagging queued posts)

and again i'm really really sorry for worrying or scaring anybody i'm not dead and i really would like to not talk about it in detail

but i would really like um

some emotional support or something i still got a bad heavy pit in my chest

#i really wish i wasn't like #still here #there are significantly more cons than pros to me being alive #in fact the only single definitive pro i can even think of is CMY2K #whereas i could go on and on ad nauseam about reasons to y'know #try and go through with it again #but like….shouldn't the thought that people Actively Want Me Here be reason enough to stick around #IDK it's like #hard to rationalize that when i still get zero percent acknowledged in real life VS online #it doesn't feel real or something like that

[elytrafemme]

also like. life update. since coming to college i think i've decided i want to be less online in general, because i don't think it benefits my mental health to be on any online website too much. i know i still have strong ties to fandom and whatnot but i'm trying to reconcile my relationship with the things i've created knowing the headspace i was in when that happened; cs is more of a diary to me than anything, at least where i'm at currently. i DO want to be on discord more this break because there's people i want to VC and catch up with-- but ultimately i think i'm like exactly the worst kind of person to operate with any kind of stability on the internet so we're going to mess around with what that looks like for me for a while. love u guys and once finals are officially up in two days i'll be back to say hi :]

#nightmare.personal #i just think like. idk. i don't really know how to compassionately phrase this #but i realized with all the stuff happening in the world that like. #it's just far better to host those conversations and do those actions irl? #for a lot of reasons. one of the major ones being that its easier to weed out people in real life who are like #wildly antisemitic and awful shit like that. vs being online its like people do that for breakfast #it's also just easier to do meaningful things. so then kind of from that i was just thinking and like #it's weird! because i don't miss the act of posting or opening discord or anything #but i miss the people. but also the way you interact with online friends is so distinctive? #like i can't just get everyone's phone numbers. it'd kind of be sick if i could but you know. everyone feels diff about internet security #so like i'm constantly drawn back to tumblr because i miss people and same with discord #but i don't really adore being on here that much so it's like. really weirdly perplexing #i'm also so goddamn bad at keeping up online friendships and everyone i know here has the patience of a saint #which i deeply appreciate it's also just kinda like. #if we were here in person i could so much better convey my appreciation for you all #so i just hope you know that i do appreciate you. it's weird. #i also have to separately reconcile with the fact that i'm an evolving person IRL #but online that comes at a lag? so like i don't even know how anyone perceives my personality #because it's not that i ever really faked it its just kind of like. we all start somewhere #i don't know what i'm saying. it's disorienting is my point. #i guess i could fix this if i got the discord or tumblr app but #i'm not going to do either of those things but like. i don't know #i wish i talked more regularly to people but the actual process of doing that feels so odd to me #i dunno. we party

[robinsnest2111]

kinda wishing I wasn't afraid to ask others to hug me or hold me or and pat my head or ask for things I need in general

#like whhyyyyyyyyyyy am i like this lmao #openingly yearning and whining about what i need online #but once i'm confronted with real life people i see on a regular basis i'm like YOU SIR HAVE NO NEEDS SO ACT NORMAL AND STAY IN UR LANE #something something the desire to be known vs the fear of others actually getting to see you vulnerable and human and flawed #tbh i wish i possessed the audacity of a pampered house cat so i could simply crawl into people's laps and demand pats and scritches y'know

[zoradementio]

Someone: *Digs up shit from about half a decade ago that some semi-popular internet personality had said as proof that they are some flavor of bigot*

People who take longer than one second to form an opinion: “Hold on, that’s a little unfair. Is there proof that this is something they’ve done continuously/is a belief they actually hold? And why should we just trust the word of this random person?”

Some headass on Twitter: “UM, ACTUALLY the person who posted this is literally a queer teenager! You’re a homophobe who is harassing a minor and you also are the same type of bigot as this internet personality AND you condone the jackasses who are actively sending death threats to this ~Queer Teen~! ...Anyway, I’m still gonna consume this person’s content that I just called a bigot, but as I am a good internet citizen I’m gonna advertise that I don’t condone this creator’s actions <3″

#bonus points if the person who makes the original callout post actively admits to WAY worse shit #or hides behind defenses like this wasn't supposed to be a callout post or I'm literally neurodivergent and a minor #yes this is mostly about the pizza tower drama but I've also hard about the sr pelo thing and it's equally as stupid #people online really like to act like at age 20 you stop developing as a person #and god forbid if you don't act like you're on a public execution platform begging for your life when this happens #like call me lenient but if you literally have only said some controversial things from like 3+ years ago with nothing within the year #then I think statute of limitations applies here #real talk I saw a vague post on Twitter that made me so upset I had to scream this into the void #and i hate that I am doing this becasue I don't like to think the worst in people like this we've got enough of it already #it's just that so much online discourse is this us vs them mentality that doesn't take into account how #the vast majority of people have nuanced views on every subject or may not even have all the facts on the topic

[meadowlarkx]

i have some thoughts i can't put into words well but the more one decides that like [assorted relatively minor things, interests, reactions] are evils the lines of which cannot be crossed, and the more specific the thoughts and opinions that need to all every single one be in alignment for one to like or just tolerate someone else, the more isolating one's experience is, and lonely, and dimmed, because more and more peope out of everybody else seem threatening, stupid, malicious, or just unworthy of one's respect or any real connection. which is a shame from a lot of standpoints. and i think it's quite easy in a sterile online space to critique things, which isn't bad in and of itself and is sometimes urgent and useful, but can quickly move to 100% condemnation and "cringing" in small social circles over just about anything whatsoever. and sometimes my roommate is like hozier has such fae vibes and it's like fine actually. it's literally totally fine and it isn't that deep at all and there's no harm meant by it.

#i know this is mistaking online for real life disease but online genuinely does influence my outlooks tm on real life and is part of it #in addition to informing some truly silly remarks i've tried to make in person in the past based on incoherent tumblr discourses #villain origin stories #my posts #in short this is a post about last week me & yesterday me awash on the tides of irl vs. many internalized online condescensions #please don't start arguing about hozier on my post #i have no horse in this race and i already know he sings about deep topics with various influences. #thinking about it i do not really think this flavor of comment cancels those things out

[boywithbear]

back with another opinion that I guarantee has been said before but I think autistic people who don't have an intellectual disability really need to speak to people who do

#I do not have an intellectual disability but my brother does #and I have dated and been friends with lots of people who do #at varying degrees of presentation #and I am autistic and I am pretty much what my psychologist just calls level 1.5 #and the lines between IDs and ASD get blurred a lot #and I think bc of that a lot of autistic ppl overstep their boundaries #idk like its very hard for me to put into words but the experiences can be very different #mainly here talking about if youre closer to level 1 #but i feel some ppl sort of just claim things that arent theirs/ours if that makes any sense #like yes asd is a spectrum but not everything relates and is the same and is about everyone equally #i also just very much think they need to be listened to more and have their voices boosted #let them be a bigger and more represented part of the autistic community and general neurodivergent community #and i also think people need to be more understanding and patient towards them #bc some people come at them hitting them with the same standards they do with everyone else when thats not how that works #idk idk if this makes sense or came across the way i mean #but i just notice a lot how like the ppl in my life are treated vs how i am treated like in real life #and how online that's like not talked about at all a single bit and their existence is ignored #it just saddens me to see #idk rant over #autistic #actually autistic #intellectual disability #learning disability #cognitive disability #neurodivergent #asd #autism #z

[bylrndgm]

today, my professor said something like: in 1976 this law was made, or something AND ALL I THOUGHT WAS LIKE 1976??? THE YEAR MIKE AND WILL BECAME FRIENDS???

there's no saving for me i guess.

#byler #mine #BEING A BYLER IN REAL LIFE IS NO COOL #me online: ✌🏻💪🏻 #vs me irl: 🧍🏼🫣

[judeiscariot]

stop calling Gerard she. he's made it clear that the pronouns he prefers are he/they. stop assigning people a pronoun.

dawg im not assigning anybody a pronoun. yes gerard has said that they use he/they but they’ve also said that people can ‘use whatever they want’ and that they ‘don’t really care.’ people use she/her pronouns online for cis men all the time and it’s not considered ‘assigning someone a pronoun’ then. i’m not claiming that gerard uses she/her in real life and most people who use she for them online do it in a half-joking context. i don’t use she/her for them the same way i would for somebody who specifically used those pronouns and i think that’s pretty clear if you look at the way i talk about them on here. i DO think it’s weird for people to use she/her only when they’re dressed feminine, wearing a dress/skirt/makeup, etc., but that’s not at all what’s happening here

#im not like mad or anything i just think some of u are maybe taking this a little too seriously? #like it’s not misgendering and it’s not the same as using a pronoun someone specifically does NOT use #and like i said if you pay attention to the specific context in which i and most other people on here use she vs he/they it’s very clear #that nobody is using she like they would for someone who used specifically she/her in real life #and i do think it’s interesting that people call cis men she/her online in a joking/meme context and that’s completely fine #but since gerard isn’t cis it’s different? idk #also like. this is tumblr dot com. come on now #answered

[bosquedemel]

when i stop to think about it i do kinda regret deleting my blog instead of just leaving it up inactive. mostly so i could go back and see what i was blogging about in the past years. not about my life but about fandoms and whatever people were talking about on this site at the time. see what tags i wrote. that whole blog spanned almost my whole 20s and while i didn’t use it as a journal often (and those posts i saved; almost 170 pages of it), i feel like it would be nice to just see what i was interested in, in a certain year and such. i mean i remember what but the blog was like a record of it. of course now that i can’t do that is when i think about doing it. typical

#i do keep records of what i watch and read though but tumblr is different #see? i'm so tied to my past and can't look forward; this is my problem #but i guess it was a big part of my life you know? and now it doesn't exist #but then i think: ok i still follow the same blogs (i kept a list) and i remember the moments & what i should be concerned about #is the actual real life things that happened in my 20s but... #its funny cause i found a post from a couple of years ago pondering on the amount of time ive spent on this site vs real life things #like how much time ive spent online in my room looking at images instead of doing things; meeting people; etc etc #but now i'm missing it all #anyways #text

[transexualbutchfagdyke]

meatspace is so much better than irl imo. no only is it just more fun (heehee meat space) but like. my online friends are real life friends. just bc I don't see them in person doesn't make it not real life. I'm not saying I won't use irl in that context, especially since it's usually easier to say "seeing X irl" but I do prefer meatspace tbh

#like saying online friends vs irl friends makes it seem like my online friends arent real life #and i do use irl in that context sometimes. its faster and shorter. but yknow.

[homunculus-argument]

You know how there's people you only ever saw once, but still remember years later? This one time like ten years ago, I was travelling by train and sitting opposite of me was some dude with one single streak of silvery white hair on his forehead. He could not have been over 25, and it wasn't just a few grey hairs but a distinct white forelock, something that I had not even known can actually happen in real life. And it was not bleached, it was definitely real natural hair. I've been dying my hair since I was 12 and mine has been everything from black to white and red to green, I can tell when nordic hair is dyed vs natural.

And he didn't look like the type to dye his hair. He was the type that would wear a fedora with cargo pants, socks with sandals type of guy that you wouldn't be surprised to hear owns a katana. Long hair on a ponytail, but with that distinct white streak running through it. I did my best not to stare while I thought, how fucking cool is that? This one specific type of a guy who would know how cool it is to have a trait that only happens to characters in fantasy books just naturally has that, and keeps his hair long to show it off.

I was still living with my family at the time, and once I got home I told them about this guy I saw on the train. Like yeah I had been to university entrance exams and that didn't go well, but I wanted to tell them about the cool anime hair of this guy I saw on the train. And my family's first question was: Are you sure? No way that would actually happen, specifically not with some guy like that, he would have dyed it just to look cool. Eventually I got tired of childishly insisting that I Know What I Saw, and just gave up and let them convince me that maybe it wasn't real after all.

Until years later, I discovered that it is a real thing that happens to people! It's called poliosis and the there's plenty of pictures of people online who have it, whose hair look just like that. I was right all along. And I don't know if he'll ever hear it, but if the dude with the Main Character Hair, who was reading a fantasy book the size of a brick travelling by train in sothern Finland somewhere in the early 2010s, I hope you still know that your hair is cool as fuck.

[kayayeteae]

Anyone go on their other social media accounts and just immediately close them cuz u realize u don’t give a fuck?? Lmfao

#I’ve been off social for 2 weeks and my god #I gotta get off this shit permanently #AS A REMINDER PEOPLE DO NOT TALK THE SAME WAY THEY DO ONLINE VS REAL LIFE #that sentence didn’t make sense but idgaf lol

[weegeechan]

There are a lot of post taking about how trans men don't owe you masculinity and are allowed to be femmine. Which fine, very vaild, but we also need to start reminding people the opposite.

Trans men don't owe you femmine just to be approachable and suitable for your taste/pallette. Trans men who present masculine shouldn't have to water down who they are just for your comfort alone. If that is something you can't handle that's not a trans men issue, that's a you need to get of the internet issue.

Like fr if one more person walks up to me talking negatively about Trans man joking or not one more time and act shockingly upset when grill thier ass about. Is really going to see the big scary men they whine so fucking much about. Because unlike most trans men on the internet I'm not going to step down when you're the one swinging and begging for me to react/give you attention.

Like I'm too old for this fucking high school behavior.

#rants n rambles #the tone shift online compared to real life is insane #like I'm really tried of kindergarten levels of masculine vs femmine in communities it shouldn't even be in #I'm also really sick and tried of this garbage aduttide towards trans men in general #especially non white trans men because alot of people like to pretend we don't exist #or just straight up just call us white to bl8ndly hate us for idk breathing #blindly*