zac oyama PCs and kindness unbefitting of their station, of themselves. colin having violence as basically his only skill but refusing the kind of violence they committed under the fda's orders and deli's pursuit of it that follows; lapin casting fly on theo instead of himself, a moment where he could have guaranteed himself an out but instead chose to better the rest of the party's chances, ending in his own death; pib being a trickster spirit (and thus should be a certified piece of shit) but having all his trickery guided and motivated by his ultimate goal to help - to help his friends and whatever pathetic men he decides to take under his wing along the way. does anyone understand what the hell i'm talking about over here
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2/4
One wears a "drug" mask and the other a "safe" mask.
Pills and contatcts.
Pipe dreams and hidden scars.
Then they played hide and seek, and I'm not sure if any of them won or lost the game.
Anyway did I say I love Muse-
Midly unrelated stuff:
I am falling back into The Raven Cycle I think. I want to draw them so bad. I also want to draw Percy Jackson stuff (I began the second book hehe)! And I need to finish these. Also I started an aftg animatic jkclvqlh why can't I be normal for once-
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An unnecessarily detailed analysis of Lenore's face when she realizes how gay she is
(Someone thought to tell me that I wrote "incessantly" instead of "unnecessarily" the last time I did this? Didn't they? You people are terrible).
These two vignettes make me crack up. Partly because it's always funny to see Miss "I can pick fights with the Deans, but thinking about my crush makes me nervous UwU" panic, but also because it's impressive how many things have just clicked in Lenore's head at this point.
Like, this girl must be feeling like when you finish a puzzle. A very gay one.
What she knows so far
At this point, as far as Lenore knows, she and Annabel have not seen each other again. There was a goodbye, and she is aware of how much that hurt her. For me, there are two possibilities:
In this flashback, Lenore has realized that she is in love with Annabel, but it is an unrequited affection.
She interprets these feelings as "oh, I'm attracted to her because she was my only friend and she was painfully ripped out of my life. Yes, friends. Very good friends.
Personally, I prefer to interpret it as the second option (you will see why).
On the other hand, it's impossible not to see how willing Annabel is to give and receive affection when it comes to Lenore: in this scene, she tries to say goodbye with a kiss,
And when they're in the closet, she literally throws herself at her.
And I want to point out one thing: Lenore doesn't remember a romantic relationship, but her body seems to: she instinctively strokes her hair when she cuddles her, even though Annabel didn't ask her to. They have done this before. There is a familiarity to this interaction.
Finally. Lenore learned chapters ago that she burned down her house, stole her dead brother's clothes, cut her hair to look more like a man for…something. She doesn't know what yet, but it had to be something important.
And she remembers it when Ada opens her mouth.
(parenthesis: that comment also makes me laugh a lot, like, Ada, dear, if you knew the CRAZY things this woman has done for love).
Please, appreciate this gay panic
If Lenore had any doubt about her feelings for Annabel (assuming option 2), it has been completely erased: she is in love with her. There is no acceptable way to rationalize this as anything else. She was in the past and she definitely is now. That's what draws her to her, that's why she desperately wants to confide in Annabel, that's why her affection seems familiar.
As if that were not enough, Annabel has that ring on her. Not only has Lenore just been hit by the reality of her own feelings, she has just realized that her love is reciprocated, this is not a one-sided crush, they are going to get married. Suddenly, these invasions of her personal space are understood for what they were: an attempt to have a physical relationship on the terms one would have with a romantic partner. Because Annabel was not her friend.
She was her fiancée.
Also, because Lenore is too pure a cinnamon roll for the world, she must be wondering how much she hurt Annabel with this: how she dodged her attempts to show affection, how she doubted her, and, the icing on the cake, that comment:
And all this mental cocoa is perfectly condensed into the expression she has in these two vignettes.
Honestly, the scene is perfect as it is, with no dialogue, but you can almost hear her thinking, "I…I did…I told my fiancée we're friends, blaze".
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