Ta-da! Today we have the first audio drama, or rather, the introduction, the main story for this CD is on another track. In total there were 10 audio drama CDs, two sets of 5 with each album being tied to a different frog
The uploads for these will have a one day break on either side, as well as a shorter track, partially because writing out the story will take more time, and partially because I calculated how many tracks there are in total and it turns out I started this a little too early; there are some seasonal songs I wanted to post around the corresponding time, and this will pad things out just enough to let me do that
On that note, there's a translation (and notes) under the cut
Hopefully it turned out well, I forgot how hard these guys are to translate by ear (^.^')
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N: When you're listening to a CD, keep the room bright and sit away from the speaker- What? Ah, it's fine? (1)
Alright then, to show our gratitude that you bought this production, our best wishes to you
Well, it's sudden, but this is the Keron army Pekopon invasion base, secretly built deep under the Hinata house
K66: I'm the commander of the Keroro platoon, nobody else could have gathered you today
Private 2nd Class Tamama!
TMM: Yes!
K66: Corporal Giroro!
G66: Hmph, really, it's not that this will be anything but you doing what you want
K66: Gi-Giroro-kun
G66: What is it?
K66: Since this time is audio only, could you change your voice?
It's scary, yes sir
G66: I-Is that so? (sweetly) Hello, I'm Giroro~♥
K66: G-Good job
N: That was also scary...
K66: Moving along, Sgt Major Kururu
966: Ku ku, present
K66: And Angol Mois-dono
M: Yes, uncle!
K66: Ah~ As always, you're such a good, honest girl, aren't you?
TMM: I won't lose like this
N: Tamama fretted
TMM: Yes! It's Private 2nd class Tamama~! ♥
K66: Replying once is enough
TMM: Gaan!
N: And then slumped
K66: Well then, everyone's here
D66: Uh, I am...
K66: (Shocked noises) I forgot him
There's no way I'd forget you! A person we value so, so much!
Lance Corporal Dororo!
D66: I've come to participate
K66: That was close, his trauma switch is still off
G66: Just hurry and tell us what in the world this is about!
(awkward pausing)
Um, what might this be about? ♥
K66: The grey cells of our army, yet also like a grandmother's embrace, Sgt Major Kururu has invented a fearsome new weapon to easily and simply conquer Pekopon
TMM: Fearsome?
G66: New weapon?
K66: And so, keep your eyes peeled and see that new weapon!
Mois-dono 12487 circuit, switch on!
M: Roger! Switch on!
(Everyone makes exclamations of amazement)
G66: Oh!
But isn't this just a normal CD?
K66: Your eyes can't see it, can they? Corporal Giroro
G66: What are you saying?
K66: This CD was developed by Sergeant Major Kururu, when it's read by the treasured home sound system of the enemy, we can freely control them through what they hear
(More exclamations of amazement)
966: Ku ku ku ku, I really am the man that makes the impossible happen
TMM: Ooh! Let's try it out right away Mr Sergeant!
K66: Wait, I'm not finished speaking yet!
Gero gero gero gero, it sounds fearsome, right? This Pekopon invasion CD is going to have 5 kinds made
G66: F-five kinds?
D66: That's amazing, good sir (2)
K66: You understand, right? If in this Heisei era recession somebody released a 5 CD, what would happen? How much of a problem would it be?
M: Mois knows! Uncle will make so that people who want to acquire all of these CD will have to aimlessly search all over for them. You could say "Strength in numbers"
K66: Mois-dono~
TMM: I can't lose!
N: Tamama fretted once again
TMM: Mr Sergeant's amazing! It's a miracle you have the popularity to make a 5 part CD set!
K66: (Distressed noises)
TMM: I screwed up
N: And once again Tamama slumped
K66: Setting that aside! All eyes on the monitor!
Behold! Our audio weapon!
G66: Th-this is!
TMM: Oh!
M: It's an original drama CD, isn't it? Uncle
K66: Precisely
TMM: Hmm, the first one is Mr Sergeant's Gunpla diary, the second is Mr Sergeant's poem collection, third is Mr Sergeant's health diary, forth is Mr Sergeant...
G66: (noises of irritation)
K66: How's it? What does everyone think? It's the best, right?
G66: Keroro! You moron! What part of this is a Pekopon invasion CD!? Ultimately, isn't this a CD of your interests!?
K66: However, after all, see, it was fun to make
G66: It was only fun for you!
TMM: Right? It won't sell with titles like this
K66: Gero!
TMM: Since there's 5 in the set, I want to make one "Tamama: The path to hand-to-hand combat, yes sir" volume (3)
G66: I'll make a CD too! One that appeals to the spirit of the Keron army "Giroro: Speeches of rage, yes sir" volume
966: Ku Ku, I've also been thinking, "Kururu: Discover through sound, great field guide, yes sir" volume. How is it?
M: Um, I have something to say. If there's space, I think a "Mois, return to her home town" volume would be good, you could say, feathering your own nest
D66: In that case, I think a "Dororo: A wonderful world of flowers & greenery, yes sir" volume would be nice, good sir. It would have bird songs, & river sounds-
723: Hey! Stupid frog!
K66: Auwah!
723: I heard it from Yoshizaki-sensei. You're making an original drama CD, aren't you?
K66: Uh, that's...
FYK: Aren't you being secretive, sergeant?
K66: Fuyuki-dono too!?
MMK: Hello! Did my Tama-chan come to play?
TMM: Ah! Even Momocchi!
723: For a well made CD, it would be nice to get Mutsumi-san as a guest to do a special talk, wouldn't it?
K66: What?
FYK: In that case, as the Occult Club, we could do an audio report on the 7 mysteries of the world
K66: Well, that's...
MMK: Since he world's 7 mysteries would cover a lot of material, let's release it as a first & second part 2 disc set
K66: W-wait a minute-this is- I'm supposed to be the author of this-
UMMK: What's that? You've got complaints about the 7 mysteries of the world?
K66: Gero~
723: No matter what, it should be something fun
K66: Well, that's true, but...
723: Then let's all do it
K66: (Noises of frustration)
N: Just then, something inside of Keroro snapped
K66: I don't wanna! I don't wanna! I don't wanna! Everyone's doesn't wanna listen to my ideas and are making their own 5-part CD sets!
G66: What? You're suddenly having a tantrum!?
TMM: "I think you should stop crying "me me me me" like a kid! (4)
K66: No way!
G66: Aren't you embarrassed as an army man?
K66: I wanna make a gunpla diary! I wanna make one!
D66: Everyone, my suggestion-
TMM: More than that, We should do a Private 2nd Class Tama-chan diary!
M: That's good, but so is my "Mois-chan: uncle love-love diary"!
TMM: Burying me under a similar idea, I won't forgive this woman!
N: Again, again, again, again, Tamama fretted
723: More importantly, are you going to call Mutsumi-san as a guest or not?
G66: I-I think if Natsumi says so, we should call him
K66: No no no no! It's my CD! We're doing what I want!
G66: You're crying over a CD!
FYK: I thought the world's seven mysteries was good
MMK: Isn't it? Hey Paul! Give it your all and to back up Fuyuki-kun! Paul! Buy every dictaphone you can find!
P: Yes, miss
M: Then, how about a three-part harmageddon-
TMM: Keep that off this CD!
N: Again, again, again, again, again, Tamama lost it
TMM: I've had it!
723: Call Mutsumi!
Everyone: Unintelligible arguing
966: Ku ku ku, it's already a mess, huh?
N: Any way, in an ugly, hostile environment like this, will the Pekopon invasion CD be born?
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1-It's a parody of the warnings that started being placed at the beginning of animated shows after flashing lights in the Porygon episode of Pokemon caused photosensitive migraines & seizures. The warnings tell viewers to sit a good distance from the screen and to keep the room well lit since this reduces the photo sensitive effect, but since it's a CD it doesn't really effect anything.
2-Keroro's ending sentences "de arimasu" is derived from military speech and translated as "yes sir" to reflect that, while Dororo's "de gozaru" is both formal and archaic (the modern counterpart is "gozaimasu"), so I translated it as "good sir" to have a similar feel.
3-The pattern for the proposed titles is, of course, modeled off the episode titles, but "volume" ("title" no maki) actually means something closer to roll, a lot of works use this pattern which dates back to when everything was written on scrolls.
4-I had to fudge this one because it doesn't translate neatly; you've probably noticed from listening that Japanese has multiple options for first person pronouns that have different associations and how well a character's categories match to the "I" they use can tell you more about them.
Keroro normally uses "Wagahai" which is an old fashioned and slightly arrogant sounding way of calling yourself (it's a bit like saying "my esteemed self") and is sort of a more archaic counterpart to the modern "Ore-sama". But during his meltdown, he uses "Boku" which it typically used by boys and younger men, in this case to make him sound more childish.
....Either way, it's a little ironic that Tamama's the one complaining about Keroro doing this since he also uses a more childish speech pattern.
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Just Keep Doing Your Thing, Brain
( In his dressing room Brain was dancing sexually to Destiny’s Child's Bootylicious on full blast )
Brain: Whoo! Play it! Yes! Let’s go! Come on! Come on! Werk it! Go wank it!
Lauren: ( comes in unexpectedly ) Hey Brain, one more hour until rehearsal time on episode 7 of Anima— ( stops in her tracks over seeing Brain dance sensually ) Brain!?
Brain: ( not hearing her ) Haha! That’s it! Whoo!
Lauren: Brain? Brain, can you hear me? God, I never seen him dance like that before. Brain! ( sighs ) He can’t hear me! I know! ( turns off the radio )
Brain: What the—!? Pinky, I was listening to— ( notices Lauren and blushes ) Oh! Lauren! I— I guess I got too distracted. Sorry. ( rubs neck embarrassedly ) Uh... how long were you there?
Lauren: Just for a split second. But that was just enough to see how adorable you are! When did you start dancing like that?
Brain: Oh, that. I uh... Since I heard the song. I honestly have a taste in dirty pop for a while. I just don’t feel comfortable with admitting it since I’m the... uh... serious, dad friend, genius...
Lauren: What’s wrong with that? You seem to have a ton of passion with your vibes.
Brain: Vibes? ( looks up confused ) Uh, what vibes?
Lauren: Your vibe. The vibe from the music. I mean, my boyfriend Tamama does it all the time. Mostly to seduce me. And it might be different when we’re doing our own thing. Like we do now. I was watching you dance, and you’re really good.
Brain: ( embarrassed ) Well... gee. Thanks Lauren. That’s really sweet of you to say, but... I still feel weird with moving so sexually since I’m a male.
Lauren: Brain, we just started 2023. There’s no such thing as mainly stuff anymore. Or girly stuff. Just like how there’s no such thing as appropriate or inappropriate anymore. We live in the 21st century, after all. No longer need those rules of morality and behavior. Besides, if it makes you happy with doing it by yourself until you are ready, then keep doing your thing. Be sexy in private if you want.
Brain: ( chuckles awkwardly ) Thanks, Lauren. That’s really nice of you to say, even if it seems kind of naive to believe such things. You sure you’re not part of some cult.
Lauren: Nah. I’m over being a good thinker. Anyways, episode 7 rehearsal in one hour. ( walks out the dressing room ) And don’t play the music so loud so you can hear me next time.
Brain: Don’t worry about it, Lauren. ( is left alone ) Whew, that had to be one of the most embarrassing moment I ever experienced with the princess. I have got to be more careful with my dancing.
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It's here! (^.^)
I'm not sure why this story is split into several parts when none of the others are, but this format works really well for uploads like this, a little like how the radio dramas that inspired CD ones were broadcast in several parts with each episode leading into the next.
I also really enjoy the character banter in this specific part (^.^) it's so much fun
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K66: Pekopon invasion CD, number two:
723: Natsumi, 1/18th scale plan
K66: Yes sir!
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N: About 15 minutes from now, your ears will feel like they're leaving your body for a world of fear.
(door creaks open)
723: I'm home!
723 (on screen): Ah! Stupid frog! Again, he left the cleaning tools out!
K66: Gero, gero, gero, gero, Natsumi-dono has returned from school, yes sir
966: Ku ku ku, according to plan
TMM: Is it alright? Going ahead with a plan while keeping it secret from Corporal Giroro & Lance Corporal Dororo?
966: If we told them, they'd oppose it
K66: Tamama, you must especially keep it secret from that red daruma. This time's "1/18th scale Natsumi" plan is-
G66: What is a secret?
K66: Corporal Giroro! When did you get here?
G66: I just got here now
K66: I-Is that right, sir? (If he'd heard, yee! It'd be really bad!)
G66: Then, what is this "1/18th scale Natsumi" plan?
K66: Gero! You heard it, then?
G66: What kind of pointless plan did you think of?
K66: Right, right, it's too trivial a plan for you to bother with
TMM: No it's not! This time, Mr Sergeant's plan is completely different from all the dumb plans before it
K66: Dumb?
TMM: It's seriously great! We're going to use the "When the bell rings, your size changes spoon" device Sgt Major Kururu invented to shrink Nacchi to 1/18th her size
G66: What?!
966: He said it
K66: P-Private Tamama, don't say-
TMM: Let me talk, Mr Sergeant!
K66: Uh~
TMM: We expect that if Nacchi is reduced to 1/18th her size her power will also become 1/18th. And if that happens, even Mr Sergeant could easily win single-handedly, and once he has dominance of this house in his hand, it'll be a stepping stone for the invasion of Pekopon.
Well, it's a nice plan, right?
G66: (rage sounds)
K66: Tamama-kun, that was supposed to be a secret from Corporal Giroro
TMM: I'm sorry Mr Sergeant! Then, I'll definitely keep it a secret how you plan to turn the shrunk Nacchi into a living figure, and enter her into the space Wonder Festival!
966: Ku ku ku, since among space otaku, even one Pekoponian living figure commands a high price.
G66: (More serious rage sounds)
K66: Gero!
G66: That's moronic! I swear all this has filled your head with flab!
K66: Even if what you're saying is true-
966: Ku ku ku ku, It's too late now
G66: What!?
(Natsumi humming on screen)
966: Natsumi is now in the kitchen, where there's a single spoon on the table, and that spoon is really...ku ku ku, the "when the bell rings, your size changes spoon" device
G66: What was that!?
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