for the record i cannot overemphasize how excited i get whenever i see a new and/or active askblog. if you run an askblog, especially one with a more uncommon format or do something funky with it then know i am enthusiastically shaking your hand and cheering you on
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Okay i just want to quickly add two cents into the conversation that's been happening today about asks and fandom.
If you're gonna request something of a writer, maybe go for something you know they write about? Like, it's very weird for me when I see someone I follow, who maybe only writes NSFW, getting a request to write fluff (or vice versa). Or requesting something about a character that person does not write about.
Like, idk maybe it's because I do that, but I assume that people would send requests/asks because they know that writer and what they like/what they're good at, and not...just because they're a writer.
I don't know if i'm expressing myself in a way that makes sense here, but you gotta go find the people who like the stuff that you do. Like, you gotta take in considerating what the person you sent an ask to likes and doesn't like. I see it almost as when recommending a book to someone. If I know that person doesn't like romance at all, I'm not gonna recommend them a romantasy.
idk sometimes it feels like people spam others askbox with the most out of whack stuff without considering there's a person on the other side, who has their own likes and dislikes.
Also, kudos to the people who close their askbox or turn off anon when it gets too much and set their boudaries.
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be me: i should draw fanart
also me 5 min later: i dont want to anymore
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how and why is there discourse about whether or not certain queer identities exist/if people should be allowed(???) to use them. why is "people know their own identity better than you ever could, and they're the only one who get a say on what they are" such a tough concept to grasp
i think if you find yourself offended by the label someone uses (especially if they're a stranger) or think it invalidates your own, it's a good idea to look inside yourself and question why that may be. more often than not, it's a result of insecurity or uncertainty of your own identity (or many other things, but i won't make a whole list here). whatever reason it is, until you resolve it, you shouldn't take it out on people for having an identity you don't understand
many have said it before but it's worth saying over and over. infighting only helps our oppressors. conservatives don't care if you're a cis gay or a xenogender aegosexual aplatonic lesbian, they hate all of us either way. trying to fit in by going for people who are easier targets for them isn't gonna help you, it'll just alienate you from your own community, and you're never gonna please them. the momentary rush you get from hearing you're not like "one of /those/ gay people" is not worth it and is gonna do more harm in the long run, i assure you
also, it is important to me to say this, but having some less than nice kneejerk reaction caused by confusion about an identity you don't understand doesn't mean you're a bad person or anything. as long as you aren't mean to that person, and you take a second to think smth along the lines of "wait a minute, this isn't any of my business" after having said reaction, you're good 👍 a lot of reflexive reactions we have to things are ingrained into us simply by. well. living in a society 🤡 and you're not terrible for having those thoughts. it's your actions that matter, and your second thought (the "wait, why did i just think that?") is more defining of your actual character and morals than your reflex. i know that having thoughts like this, even tho they're unwanted, can very easily make one spiral, so it's important to me that whoever needs to hear this knows this doesn't make you a bad person 🙏 you're good, keep taking actions to be good, accept other people even if you don't understand them, and you're on the right track :)
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