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#okay im gonna stop ranting now
marvelouspenny · 2 years
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mood after watching vol. 2:
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bonesrbleaching · 20 days
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had the most braindead repetitive conversation/argument with my parents. buzz cuts are too masculine but if you dye a design on it it become effeminate which is bad because then you look weak and if youre weak then society falls apart (all societies ever that have fallen apart for any reason are actually because of feminine men) and we start sacrificing babies. and also all mental illness is invented because only 4 people had anxiety in the 90s and covid was made up so that we would all become gay and trans and then the government can control us better and be joe biden's little sex slaves. and also i need to keep my hair long because my father finds it attractive. what
#lolaa.txt#what do i even tag this with . my mother wouldn't let me leave and i kept asking for sources and she kept saying 'i'm your mother!!!'#'i wouldnt lie to you!'#okay. say that to someone maybe who doesnt know you lie to them all the time.#its tiring going around in circles with her.my father is better because at least he admits when he doesnt have a reason for feeling some wa#also what got me. she said 'do you own research if you want!! but im right!!!'#yeahh not seeing anything about anything you just said. i think you made that up.#i have a theory that my mother secretly hates herself because she believes all women are weak and must serve strong men#and my father has so so much trauma and anxiety that he cant be that strong man#so now she feels like shes betraying her very biology when she has to step up.#and also because i am stronger than her now and my hair is long and far far denser than hers and i have a younger face#that she feels that im wasting my precious femininity that she could be using. does that make sense.#shes so miserable trapped in her idea of what makes a man and a woman what they are. once you stop caring about what makes someone somethin#you dont have to worry about anyone else.#im queer because i dont really feel that connection to biological and social ideas of gender that my parents seem to#never really have#im not gonna theorize 'ohh shed be happier nonbinary' or stuff like that because it is up to you and you alone to define who you are#if you spend your whole life trying to fit a box for the sake of fitting the box#then when would you have any space for self discovery#youve invented personality traits to go along with your box. now you can never ever change or grow as a person. congrats#and you know what? one day she will die. and that will be the end of that.#and i will live and i will probably shave my head a thousand times. and come up with new names#and new ways to be a better person that makes me feel happy#and i will dress like a boy because its all made up anyways. who cares.#and if you care? that much about what im wearing or how i look?#then thats your problem and i wont be responsible to maintain your happiness.#SORRY RANT OVER.#im just so flabbergasted. what a sad life someone can lead poisoned by jealously and reactive rhetoric.#tw homophobia#tw transphobes
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be-gay-do-crime-ahaha · 2 months
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Holy fucking shit the dysphoria is dysphoria-ing right now. I feel physically nauseous oh my fucking god. I’m gonna fucking kill someone maybe myself rn I’m gonna lose my shit holy hell.
Doesn’t help that I’ve been incredibly overstimulated the past few days every sound is like a fucking cheese grater in my ears oh my god.
#dysphoria#gender dysphoria#sensory processing disorder#tw emetophobia#for the nausea mention#idk if that’s needed or not#but yeah I’m about to tear off my fucking skin and jump off a building I am losing my fucking mind#it’s so over#lmao my brain is fucked i genuinely wanna off myself over this shit#and my mother keeps refusing to even entertain the idea of getting my name changed on the school role#even though all my teachers and friends call me Alex and that’s what I’ve been going by for a few years now#and it would make things significantly easier for everyone because it would fix my email name as well#so that’s not helping#and she was talking about my period and being all “it’s okay all WOMEN get these ❤️ you’re just becoming a beautiful woman#and now she keep being rude to my sister because she uses men’s deodorant (because it works better) and doesn’t really wear dresses#(because she finds them annoying and inconvenient)#and is being all “hurr durr you’re copying your SISTER stop being so masculine”#like fucking hell#shit talking me and harassing my sister all at once#man I want to fucking kill myself im so done with this shit#and I’m so overdue on school work and I feel so overwhelmed and stressed this fucking sucks#and I know the school work and stuff is fully my fault for forgetting and slacking off but I can’t bring myself to do them because the#stress of fucking up and just how much of it I have to do is pushing me to my damn limit#I can’t even bring myself to start on my film and media assignment that’s a week overdue because I’m so fucking stressed just thinking about#it and I’m so overwhelmed I can’t fucking do this. I just can’t. and I know I’m at fault for procrastinating and being too lazy and stressed#to bring myself to start working on it#and things are just gonna get more and more difficult#so yeah. rant over I guess. sorry guys#did not mean to rant in the tags this much dysphoria is just killing me and so is general stress#tw suicidal thoughts
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mymp3 · 1 year
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been typing and deleting so many posts today so I've made a deal with myself. if i can draw and post a fully finished art piece, then I can post my thoughts from today. wish me luck 👍
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mejomonster · 1 year
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I'm getting a little better babes guess who just had pumpkin bread today! And kimchi all week! And potatoes bread yesterday!
#rant#my health issues#ueah i know it doesnt sound like a big deal#but september 2021 i couldnt eat liquids or solids at all and was vomiting nonstop#november 2021 i could eat mushy vegetables of somr kinds and mushy meatballs#and was still throwing up often#now i havent thrown up at all in a month#i havent been able to eat cabbage in over a year. it would cause immense pain whrn i tried#and thus whole week? NO PAIN FROM THE KIMCHI CABBAGR#i also havent been able to eat bread of any kind for a year. i had a little bread in spring 2022 until#food tolerance lowered again and i couldnt tolerate even a bite#i am trying small portions of breads and cabbages again and its going okay!#slight 1-2 pound bloating like a normal person response#but no intense pain and stopping my medicine from moving my gi tract anymore!#i am gonna try beans eventually but they hurt super bad too from even 1 spoonful when i tried in august#so im a bit scared to try them again#i did try potatoes and while i tolerated them a liytle. they definitely slowed my gi tract and made me flush#but im Actually Sensitive to potatoes. so its not a this past year health issue thing. its a lifetime sensitivity#so im just glad i could eat somr potatoe without intensd pain. it shows im going back toward normal function for me#4ather than how sick ive been#also magnesium is FINALLY hitting me like a normal person!#rhis past year if i took like 8 capsules magnesium citrate it would do nothing#yesterday i took 3 the suggested dosage and it made me use bathroom in a couple hours#which i was shocked by cause. ive had 10+ for like a week in a row befote and they didnt help at all
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big-urchin-energy · 1 year
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cannot understand when fic writers have chapters that are over 40k long. like there is literally no need, split that shit into *at least* two chapters like. that's basically a whole novel why do you think writing shorter chapters is beneath you
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crabs-nonsense · 1 year
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Oh noooo, I just found out Ranpo’s English va is going to be at a con i really wanted to go to but ended up being too expensive and im even more sad now.
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cnnamonrolls · 1 year
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maaaan
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snekdood · 1 year
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Ppl gotta understand that just bc you do x thing because you're mentally ill, doesnt mean your actions dont have the same effect if you weren't. Like if you've been manipulative to your friends, you cant get mad at them for not sympathizing entirely with you when you go on about how they dont accept you for your mentally ilness. Regardless of your reason, you were still manipualtive, you fucked with peoples trust. Theyre still gonna have trust issues about you even if its bc of whatever mental illness you have.
#im not saying its cool for them to abandon you but cmon. you have to consider sometimes other people and what they can handle#bc if you keep manipulating your friends or whatever theyre gonna get used to being manipulated and expect it from other people#whatever the case. people have limits. your friends have limits. im not saying theyre always justified. im not saying your friends are#never abliest. but they do have limits. and if you're yelling at them all the time about being perfect or whatever you cant exactly#be surprised when they dip out.#like for example. im a p aggressive and angry guy. clearly. if youve seen any of my posts.#ive always got something to rant about. and while im not quite as much like this irl its still a thing about me. im very very vocal about#whatever injustice i percieve happening to me or others lol. but i can understand why me being intense and angry and ready to throw hands#at the drop of a hat would make some people want to avoid me. i understand it makes some ppl feel scared and unsafe.#its not something i try to do. i dont try to make ppl i like feel unsafe. i try not to be that way around ppl w those kinds of issues#but im not gonna throw a fit and be like 'you guys are okay with bpd until i get really really angry and call you a cunt'#like... uh... yeah. i dont blame ppl like that for dropping me entirely if im getting angry all the time around them and it triggers them#and i dont seem to stop or be able to stop.#sure its not great. sure i dont want to be as aggressive and angry around anyone let alone ppl afraid of that sorta thing. but this is#the current state of my being. its something im working on. and i can understand why some ppl cant handle me right now as i am.#idk. just. shit like that man#another example. im hella hella HELLA bad at communicating via technology. unless you're in front of my face my mind just forgets we were#even talking sometimes. this naturally will cause issues. how am i gonna get upset at someone for being mad i stoped responding#in the middle of a conversation? sure i didnt mean it. this is purely unintentional. however that doesnt change the fact of my actions.#it doesnt change the fact that that person might feel unwanted. i can apologize day and night but until i actually try to be more attentive#of my phone this is just gonna keep happening yknow. how is it fair to get mad at other ppl for getting mad at you over that?
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memser · 15 days
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oh NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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ihae · 3 months
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the switch up is crazyyyy
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minnieshark · 9 months
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kethabali · 10 months
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i literally ran out of tags from ranting on my previous post so let me just continue here lmAOO
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riptidemochi · 1 year
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love-belle · 11 months
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no comment !!!
*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which they finally reveal their shared life.
or
for when you got really lucky with your love. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚
social media au // carlos sainz jr. x fem!reader
warnings - language
author's note - hello!! i can't stop making these lmfao but fr these are so fun to write, i love them!! i really hope u like this, thank you for reading <3 i think, emphasis on think, that i will be able to post a pierre gasly social media au tonight along with part i of a max verstappen one so yeah, keep an eye out. i love you, hope you're okay <3
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, carlossainz55 and 985,517 others
yourusername people ask how long have i loved u, no comment
tagged carlossainz55
8,962 comments
username SHUT UO SHIT UP SHIT UP SHUT UP OMG
username OH MY GOD?????? WHAT??????
username her using her own song to hard launch her man is so iconic of her
username THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR AGAHSJKAKSNAKA
landonorris fucking finally
-> yourusername props to carlos for convincing me 🙏
username "no comment" MA'AM WE NEED ANSWERS
username im vrying omg whag yje fjxk
lewishamilton the best couple ❤️
*liked by yourusername*
username what the duck i lo e them so mucj omh
username he's so pretty omg
carlossainz55 te amo ❤️
-> yourusername te amo mi amor ❤️
carlossainz55 loved you for a thousand lifetimes probably
-> yourusername carlos i will cry i love you :/
username they're so parents whatcthefucj
username RUE WHEN WAS THIS
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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liked by yourusername, landonorris, yourbestfriend and 964,528 others
carlossainz55 how i got you honey, even i don't understand
tagged yourusername
9,146 comments
username THE WAY "the party" BY Y/N IS LITERALLY THEIR SONG OMG
username HIM QUOTING HIS GIRL'S SONG I COULD CRY
username gone deceased six feet under decomposed decaying
charles_leclerc will you finally stop calling me at 3am ranting about how much you love y/n???
-> carlossainz55 no x
username MOTHER
username she eats everytime
username can carlos fight question mark
danielricciardo chihuahua energy in the second pic
-> yourusername WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
-> carlossainz55 no no i get what you're saying
username THE WAY I SCREAMED
lilymhe the only thing i like abt u is ur gf
-> yourusername my love ❤️
-> carlossainz55 can't believe you because same
username he's down BAD bad
username this acc will turn into a y/n fanpage and i will eat up every second of it
≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱
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yourusername i know how lucky i am
tagged carlossainz55
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username GOODBYE.
username LITERAL PARENTS NOW OMG
username STOP THEY'RE GONNA BE SUCH GOOD PARENTS
danielricciardo normal y/n is such a gem to deal with, can't wait for the pregnant version!! good luck mate!!
-> carlossainz55 thank you brother, i will be needing it 🙏
-> yourusername these comments are public and you're on the couch tonight.
username CARLOS AS A DAD I CANNOT
username im so 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
username THIS IS INSANEEEE LIKE WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY WERE DATING BEFORE YESTERDAY AND NOW THEY'RE GONNA BE PARENTS LIKEEE
landonorris best godfather is here ❤️
-> charles_leclerc no
-> pierregasly no
-> lewishamilton no
-> maxverstappen1 no
-> danielricciardo no
username that baby is gonna be so blessed and loved
username stop im so happy for them sm
carlossainz55 i'm the one who got lucky, thank you for everything ❤️
-> yourusername gonna cry brb x
carlossainz55 i love you so much
-> yourusername my love for you grows everyday it's insane
username OH MY GOD SHJAKABDJAKANS
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hanniluvi · 10 months
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💭 — ENHYPEN WHEN YOU CALL THEM BRO !
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tysm for requesting anon!! i hope you enjoy <3
warnings : mentions of pet names (like once or twice?), mentions of kissing
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🖇️ — HEESEUNG
— at first he’s chill and thinks it was just a slip up
— cause he knows you’ve been hanging out with riki and jungwon too much lately so he lets it slide at first
— but like once he hears it again hes like okay something is up . so like he automatically stops everything he’s doing and just stares at you.
— “why do you keep calling me bro?” and you’re like 🤨 cause you thought nothing was wrong about it
— he fr goes on a full rant about why you shouldn’t be calling him bro and only his members could and how you’re only allowed to call the rest bro 😭
— ofc u don’t take him seriously cause he looks cute complaining about it. and he’s like “are you listening.” and you js go “yeah bro i am” and he falls onto his knees SO DRAMATIC FR .
— and you have to apologize millions of times and give him a bunch of kisses which he gladly accepts as a payment <3
— now you know not to do so ! you do it sometimes for fun tho
🖇️ — JAY
— he’s gonna be so quick to spot it out, he just won’t let it slide.
— “bro? really?” automatically raises his eyebrow and starts questioning you . imagine a cartoon character js angrily tapping their foot on the ground , hes like that LMAO
— you just wanted to tease him more so you’re like “what’s wrong with that?”
— “im not your bro, im your boyfriend.” he’s so straightforward with it , it just makes u fall for him again.
— he feels happy when he manages to convince you to stop doing it doesn’t tell you how relieved he felt LMFAO
— and without you knowing he goes onto scolding heeseung bc you’ve been hanging around him lately LMAO
— “heeseung they been saying bro a lot.” “okayyy jay what does this have to do with me..” “you’re the problem in our relationship.” “WHAT?” save heeseung
🖇️ — JAKE
— gets real pouty and confused real quick after hearing it more than once. like he’s sure that bro is in his vocabulary BUT hearing you call him bro ??? its just a no no.
— “okay i think that’s enough.” and ure like enough of what .. and hes going on a rant for real BUT hes shy about it … like sir spit it out !!!
— you were understanding untillll it started slipping out again. he’s like devastated and goes on saying “layla would never call me bro” LIKE AS IF HIS DOG HAD ANY PART TO THIS??
— now you only call him bro for fun or like when he gets u mad on purpose .. it became an advantage bc he switches up SO FAST just for you to not call him that anymore. love him <3
— starts using more pet names with you so that you’re reminded that he’s your lover and not some bro </3
— “love you snookums” “okay that’s even worse than your other nickname.” “can’t help it.”
🖇️ — SUNGHOON
— nope he does not take it!! he does not want his own lover to be calling him bro ??
— “do bros do this?” bye he would go to you and kiss you , maybe bring you onto your lap too and js look at you .. or just wrap his arms around your waist .. “i don’t think bros do that.” sir stop this im not ur strongest soldier
— after seeing ur flustered face , he’d grin feeling proud .
— every time you do that, he’s just gonna start becoming really clingy and just touchy
— andddd you can say you call him bro on purpose 😊 he knows
— but he doesn’t care cause that just gives him a reason to just shower you with kisses 😊
🖇️ — SUNOO
— if he’s busy w something and hears you call him bro, he’s whipping his head around so fast when he hears that from you
— literally this emoji 😧 and is like “what did you just say?”
— and you repeat it again and he’s like okay … this is a problem. he racks up ideas on why you would call him that…he thinks real hard as if your relationship with him is falling apart???
— you have to explain how when you’re comfortable w/ someone you call them that. as much as he’s glad you’re comfy with him, he still refuses it
— “i’m glad you feel comfortable with me, but i rather for you to call me something sweet. like love or baby or something. just not bro.”
— gen feels proud that you listened and called something else . smiles like an idiot whenever you called him something sweet! your reward? lots of love from sunoo <3 as if he doesn’t shower you with love everyday
🖇️ — JUNGWON
— oh you already know he’s just gonna laugh it off awkwardly. LIKE REAL AWKWARD
— ha. ha. ha. it’s literally him and funny to imagine
— and you’re like 🤨 cause why tf is he acting like that
— “oh nothing 😊” he’s lying and he’s glad you picked up on it, hoping you’d catch on
— and he starts double taking, maybe he wasn’t being so affectionate as a bf which he is stop and just starts trying to do more physical touch w/ you or any of the love languages you love </3
— you calling him bro got him asking jay for help 😭
— literally only feels better until you call him something else than bro. like he feels like he’s doing well and is proud of it ! like once you call him smth else hes all giggly and like oh 🤭please don’t call him bro in the future </3
🖇️ — NIKI
— okay okay, he knows you and him joke around a lot, but you’re getting a LITTLE too comfortable
— like the person he loves ??? besides his other members ??? calling him bro ???
— like he wouldn’t be too vocal on it until you’ve said it to him too much . he would try to show you how he doesn’t like it as much but you don’t seem to pick up on it.
— so what does he do? hold your hand / ask for a hug after you do! surely you’ll get it 😊 and trust me you do.
— “ki why the hell are you holding onto my hand so tight?” “ i dunno, why am i?”
— once you find out, you tease him sm, leaving him with a red face and telling you to shut up.
— but once you stop, he feels relieved <3 love him lots please
— just starts becoming very clingy to you now :)
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💭 — i love my boyfriends 😊
ENHA PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @ixomiyu @yenavrse @shinsou-rii @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @yenqa @dimplewonie @bubblytaetae @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @starcubes @starikizs @wonioml @chirokookie @xiaoderrrr @neozon3nha @en-chantedtomeetyou @millksea @enhaz1 @eundiarys @woon2u @ja4hyvn @judeduartewannabe @j-wyoung @thia-aep @vampcharxter @softpia @officiallyjaehyuns @itsactuallylina @hsheart @sweetjaemss @ahnneyong @hanienie @jwnghyuns @kpoplover718 @jiawji @rikizm @haknom @yeokii @wvnkoi @tnyhees @teddywonss @shinunoga-iie-wa @flwrshee
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