#now that I have disattached from it

[predetachment]

Just remember what happens on earth stays on earth

#kendrick lamar #don't overlook the song #it unlocks the whole meaning of the album #yeah i figured out that i listen to Kendrick on top 0.001% #the same happened last year with even more minutes #but I was afraid to accept my love for this art #so I masked it with obsession #now that I have disattached from it #I can come out to the rest of the world #depression was hard but he was one of my guides #it was worth the tour #Spotify

[knightyoomyoui]

(G)I-DLE Miyeon x M & F Reader - “The Woman Of My Dreams”

One of my longest one-shots ever made with 10,700+ word count! Enjoy... reading, I guess? Hehe...

The weekend is about to end tomorrow, but that won't stop you from continuously spending all of the free time you have with whatever you want to do that would provide you entertainment or relaxation.

One of them is to play video games on his desktop computer. Currently, your cousins have offered you an invitation, which you eagerly accepted.

The longing and anticipation to interact with them, at least for today, is what compelled you to join them.

Sitting on his comfortable gaming chair, he focusedly monitored his movements on Valorant, the game that he's playing, underlying on the instincts and strategized aspect that would be handy on securing a victory for their group.

"There's the one, it's heading to B guys."

One of your male cousins spoke to the mic. You are the only one left on your squad, while the opposite still has two more left.

You traveled around on the paths that would lead you to Base B, but as you were about to arrive there, you were met by an update saying that the team had already done the most crucial part of the gameplay.

"They planted the spike now. Be careful, YN."

You slowly checked if there may be traces found that will got them obvious of guarding the spike. Having nothing, you began to formulate a plan on how you will infiltrate the base without getting killed.

You still do believe that they're inside and they're just really good at hiding.

"Damn it, I'm taking the risk now guys." You breathed deeply for a few seconds before you executed the action, invading the base with 15 seconds remaining before the rounds ends.

Looking back and forth, YN then heard footsteps right away. He/she saw the enemy hiding near the crates, and killed it with a sniper.

"Go, YN! Cmon hurry!"

You were startled when you noticed that a damage took hit by your character Phoenix after getting slightly shot on the back.

9 seconds remaining.

Holding the keys and some quick shifts of the mouse, you rotated Phoenix quickly and aimed it at the last one before firing a shotgun at the player.

All wiped out, the cousins elicited a mix of joy and panic as they simulteanously shouted for you to disattach the spike.

Thankfully, it was 1 second left where you successfully did it. You won the game and all of you celebrated while sending their praises for YN's smart play.

"Nice game, YN. That was very close."

"Yeah, I actually thought I wouldn't make it." you chuckled.

"Nice clutch. The luck was on us, so let's just be grateful with it."

All of you agreed with it. Back at the lobby, you decided to fix your settings for a bit while waiting for them since there's one of them haven't pressed the ready button yet.

Chatting along with them about some randomized topics, your cousin returned and spoke on the mic to alert the rest.

"Sorry guys, just did a bathroom break. We can go-"

"Loveee, do you want some sandwiches?", a certain feminine person spoke in the background which could be clearly heard by all of you who are now smirking and having teaseful faces.

"Wait, what?"

"Sandwiches. I made some for us."

"Woah really?"

"Mmmhhmm go get some."

It was a brief silence for a while before that woman unexpectedly spoke for all of you.

"Oh, I'm sorry guys. I know you are playing with Beomgyu here. I didn't mean to interrupt of whatsoever."

"No, it's okay Shuhua. We get it." Taehyun said, who is one of your male cousins you are currently playing with.

"Hi, Shuhua!" you and Minnie who is your other cousin greeted.

"Hey guys!"

"Apology accepted only if you make us some sandwiches too next time we meet, okay?"

"Oh you guys." Shuhua laughed. "Come here anytime you guys want, that's a note taken."

"Thanks for this, love. It was so good."

You were listening to their conversation and couldn't help but alter your emotions in order to feel less happy of hearing the sweet sentiments they exchanged with one another.

You became curious again about what it truly feels like to be in your cousin's position and have a loving girlfriend accompany you with anything you may want to receive that would probably satisfy your needs and desires.

You couldn't help but be little envious of your cousin for already dating someone great. Knowing the issues you're facing, it appears that some fixation is still needed for you to become like him. Nevertheless, you still wanted to become like him one day.

"Glad you liked it. I'm going back there, continue playing with your cousins. Love you!"

"Thanks again for this, love you too!"

A sound of a door shutting close was heard. you closed the loadout and stopped your thoughts about that to focus back in the game.

"Damnit, Beomgyu. What's with the sudden slap of reality that we wouldn't be that lucky as you." Kai said, earning a hilarious response from the rest.

"It wasn't intentional, okay? And cmon guys, just find somebody around. Who knows, maybe you guys can be as blessed as I am now too. I don't want to be the only one left being like this from all of us, ya know." Beomgyu advised.

You wondered about that. It's not as easy as it looks, especially for a guy/girl like you who not a social person.

After another hour of playing with them, you cut off the call and ended the game. Thinking of wanting to get some rest, you head to the bedroom and slumped your body on the bed lazily, where you slowly fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Why are you crying? Tell me, please."

"You keep on ignoring me these past few days like I've done something wrong that I don't even recall doing one. Did I really do one?"

"N-No, you don't okay? I-"

"Then what is it? Everytime I see you away I can tell that there's something wrong. You don't even lay an eye on me if you wanted to or speak fluently if I try you to. Do you hate me now, YN?"

"Please, don't say it like that."

"You're making me feel lonely, YN. When I made myself to be youf friend, I thought that we would be nothing but happy with everything. But now, it feels like there's something changing again and I'm confused what to do to keep you from me. Are you gonna leave me, YN?"

"N-No, I don't! Please, listen to me-"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"WAAAAAHHH HUH... HAAGGHH... HA..."

You sprung your eyes up in a state of shock and petrified as you rose your body from the bed.

Looking around the room and at your clock, you noticed that it was still 2 o'clock early in the morning. The sky is still dark, with moonlight shining through the posts on the streets, illuminating your window.

For the nth time, you had this dream again of being with somebody you didn't even know or couldn't even identify. But judging by her appearance, she looks like a girl. She wears this dress that has different colors in every dream you have with her.

Everything is describable except for her face. Imagine it being blocked by strong sunlight. It was blank, but you knew that you had to do something to fill it up and reveal the answer.

The question though, is... how?

Anyway, you still feel sleepy, so you don't mind it that much for now. You considered it just one of your strange nights that bothered you. Returning back to your bed, you closed your eyes and proceeded with your peaceful slumber to doze off into the remaining hours ahead.

-------------------------------

You went to school without much help again with your parents, with your mom and dad both away from work. This is where you mostly learn how to be dependable to yourself and mature in your actions and mindset to support yourself on your own.

Fortunately, you have your grandmother with you, but as a request, you didn't want her to assist you too much because you feel like you will never learn how to stand up for yourself.

Additionally, you didn't want her to be disturbed or get tired just to do things for you that you could even do easily by yourself.

Despite the hesitation, she just agreed and didn't take it with hard feelings. She understood that you just wanted to be thoughtful of hers, so the only thing she can repay you for is to do the same for you as she monitors you around silently, just in case you struggled and there you will finally need some for her to do.

Back at the scene, you went to class early since it's Monday and there's a flag ceremony being held whenever it's the start of the school week again.

After that, you endured lengthy lectures from every professor about your three different subjects slated for the first half of your class schedule. The bell rang just in time for the instructor to distribute the required assignment.

Bringing your own lunch box to avoid spending most of your money, especially when you are saving up to buy a precious thing, you looked for a vacant spot and sat there.

As usual, you were all alone, just like you wanted, so you opened up your lunch box and prayed before scooping a spoonful and having your first munch.

While you were eating silently as you disregarded the numerous people in the same room as yours, you became oblivious enough not to be aware of this random girl suddenly appearing in front of you.

"That's a nice looking cooked lunch you have there." A girly voice spoke near at you. You paused your hand in mid-air when you heard that.

Looking upwards, you met a figure of a random schoolgirl with her tray filled with her orders being holded in her hands. "Uhh, I'm sorry?"

"Chicken nuggets with bacon and egg, that's a must win for sure!" The girl lets out one of the cheerful and mellow giggle you've ever heard in your entire life, but you didn't made it obvious because you still are trying to figure this out:

"May I know your concern why did you appear in my spot?"

"Correction: OUR spot." The girl placed her tray on the table and sat on the empty chair in front of you.

"What the- hey!"

"Thanks for the seat!"

Your face crumpled in confusion at the guts of this girl to just came up with her own doing without permission of somebody else. "Miss, I didn't even allowed you to seat with me. Leave."

"Aww that's sad of you, but don't you ever get bored of being alone?" The girl frowned. You look at her closely now that she's very near in front of you. Awe-struck and dumbfounded, you recognized this girl's beauty and adorable features.

She has pearly white skin, her cheeks are pinkish enough to be misintepreted that she always blushes at certain reasons, her black long hair organized neatly and that shiny smile she has displayed over you.

"I'm not. I've been doing this for a long time now and I got pretty used to it."

"Yeah, I know. I've been seeing you here every week, nothing but yourself eating on your own. I could tell that exactly that you ain't bothered anymore of being alone." The girl replied. You were quite surprised that she's already noticing you every day. It didn't crossed your mind that other would care about it as less as you do.

"You do?"

"Mmhmmm. I'm not being a stalker or what, huh! Just look around, you're the only one who doesn't have any classmates to eat with. I mean... no offense but, why didn't you just eat at the classroom?"

"My classmates always steal my food from me." You answered. "And my patience is thin so... I found the perfect place for me not to get interrupted."

"Ohhh... but still it doesn't look right that you are different than every one here." The girl began to take out the orders laid on the tray.

"I'm sorry, miss. I barely even know you, why does it bother you that much?"

"Because...

.... I want to be your friend."

"What?"

"You heard me." The girl smugged. "I've been wanting to do this but now that I've seeing you frequently without having change was enough for me to do it so... I took the move now then."

"Sorry, miss. I appreciate the concern but I'm truly fine, really. You can have some other students there as your friend. They'll need it more." You said with a forced apologetic smile as you start comsuming the last remaining portions you have in your plate. "Please, leave."

"Oh... okay then. If that's what you want." The girl pouted and brought her orders back on the tray and she stands up on her seat. "I didn't meant to be rude but... hey, my names Miyeon. How about you?"

"I won't gonna tell, please just go away." You avoided her look as you continued to focus on your food.

"Fine. I might failed today but I'm getting it soon anyway." The girl whose name is Miyeon shrugged. "But take this as my word, mister. I won't going to stop! As much as you like or not, Cho Miyeon is going to be your friend from now on!"

She raised her fist to the sky and left joyfully, returning to her original position. You were left gawking and furrowing your eyebrows as you were astonished at how authoritarian this Miyeon is.

You may be skilled at pretending, but you couldn't lie deep within yourself that Miyeon successfully had you built a fascination for her.

The bell chimes again to signify that class resumes. Recess is over, so you left your spot and walked through the hallway. You noticed that Miyeon speedily walked ahead of you, watching her skip and hum softly as she entered her classroom. You realized that hers was just next to you.

When the class ended, it was bad timing that the heavy rainfall advisory that was announced earlier in the news arrived at noontime. You forgot to bring an umbrella, so you cursed under your breath and defeatedly watched the other students freely escape the campus with their belongings.

"How am I going to get home early with this? Should I call grandma? Nah... I don't want her to get sick. Ugh, now I'm going to stay here for I don't know how long. I'm pretty tired now; I want to rest already," You muttered to yourself.

As you kept on watching the rain fall hardly to the wet and soaked ground, you were startled when an umbrella opened beside you. You look it up to see who owns that hand that holds it, and to your surprise, it was Miyeon who is smiling again at you just like she did earlier.

"Forgot to bring yours huh."

"W-what are you doing here?"

"Uhh, going home?" Miyeon replied, it sounded sarcastic so you couldn't help but to begun doubting her.

"Are you stalking me, Miyeon?"

"Oooh now calling me with my name huh, that's better." Miyeon giggled. You almost get lost again by that soothing sound. "And what did I say back in the recess, I wasn't intentionally stalking you. It happens that we have this... great timing between us to caught up with one another."

"Ugh, whatever you say." You shook your head.

"Don't believe me? I was just late because I had to help my professor check our tests today. You can ask hin if y-"

"Yeah yeah, alright fine. I believe you now. No need."

"See, that was easy." Miyeon smirked. "Don't try to be arrogant, YN. If that works with others, that won't be the same for me."

"I-I'm not..." you gritted your teeth and grunted. "Argh, you're annoying. I didn't even asked for you to come here, act like my friend and accompany me."

"You sure you don't want to?" Miyeon looked at you before she side-eyed the heavy rain outside while she wiggles her umbrella.

"N-No." You looked away from her.

"Are you sure? Huhhh okay then, I'm going now. I hope you finally get home after 3 hours of waiting, I heard that the rain will s-"

She was about to step on the staircase when you quickly made her halt.

"No, wait! Stop, f-fine! C-can I join you under your umbrella?"

Miyeon grinned and raised it above her head. "There you go. Now get on my side!"

You embarassingly went beside her and tried to adjust your weight at Miyeon's level of holding the umbrella. "I-I just don't have any other choice, okay? Don't take this like I still accept your initiation."

"Yeah yeah whatever you say, YN." Miyeon rolled her eyes and mischieviously smickered at you. "You're welcome, by the way."

You shook your head at her mockery as a payback for what you did to her.

As you and Miyeon started to walk through the middle of the rain, you can feel the coldness through your skins and your socks and shoes getting soaked.

You sensed Miyeon's hand starting to be challenged with the force of the heavy rainfall dripping down to the surface of the umbrella that causes it to be pressed down and sway unsteadily.

You didn't want the girl to bring you both into a much difficult situation by possibly dropping or slipping down the umbrella in her hold that could cause you both getting bathed in the rain so you did what it had to be done and possibly get sick.

You don't want her to be sick and cost her attendance.

"Let me." You patted Miyeon's hand on the handle. She looked upon you as she felt that slight touches of your fingers to her skin.

"I'll be holding it. You can't take this longer. Just... hold on to me if you want, don't stay out and wet yourself from the rain."

Miyeon slowly lends the umbrella to you, listening to your suggestion. Being the one holding it, you strengthened your arm so that it can handle the pressure of the raindrops.

Feeling a bit shy and grateful at the same time, Miyeon slowly moves her hands on the arm you are using and gripped it with just a right tightness.

"Thank you, YN. I didn't know you were this gentleman too, huh."

"Stop teasing me Miyeon. I'm just doing this because I don't want us to get sick because you accidentally let go of the umbrella with your shaky hand." You said while you remain your glance on the direction you both are heading too.

"So, we'll be going to your house first then."

"Ofcourse, you own the umbrella."

"Yay, so I get to see your house also today? Woah, isn't that cool that we just became friends today and now I'm here with you on the way to your place?!"

"Again, I'm not your friend, Miyeon. I'm just letting you do the favor because I needed it."

"Heh. He's still in denial" Miyeon blurted in her mind.

"Sure, YN. You don't really sound exactly like you're approaching a friend for that." Miyeon winked and nuzzled her head at your arm which taken you aback and confusingly get flustered at her action.

All you have to do is sigh and endure this new company you're having with Miyeon.

Despite all of your stubborn remarks that went against Miyeon's desire to be friends with you, those engagement that you did along with her conversations she had with you along your trails beneath the rain that slowly builds the closeness between you and her says otherwise.

Then few days later, you had to finally submit as you admitted to Miyeon that you acknowledge her now as your friend. Your very first official friend around the campus.

She's just too irresistable and "annoying", that's why.

2 MONTHS LATER

Your friendship with Miyeon became broad as it developed over time with your daily interactions with each other. Ever since you finally decided to be her friend, she couldn't leave you alone unattended with her attention.

You could tell it was exaggerated now, but you don't really mind at all at the same time. In fact, she was helping you in some other way. It's not a big deal to you because, at some point, you needed her presence, whether physically or maybe through some social media where you two stay connected with each other.

At least she knows what to do and how to adjust if she observes. If you were in a bad mood, she just let you burst out whatever you wanted to release from this uncomfy feeling that you'd been containing inside of you. Miyeon has become the trustworthy person to whom you can open up about your personal troubles.

If you needed entertainment, she was just right there, all ready to join your fun, whatever you wanted, which was playing video games. It was even better to know that she's a gamer girl and loves anime. Both of you correlate with each other, and that's impressive to think about.

Sometimes, it makes you wonder if meeting someone like her was a coincidence or meant to happen. It was like meeting yourself but in the form of another person, and you can't even describe how compatible you feel because of Miyeon.

With all that, it's safe to say that you've actually grown to like all of these things that you're having with Miyeon. This annoying, playful, bubbly girl who just invaded your space turns out to be a blessing in disguise in your life.

Today was an event currently being held on your campus. This requires all the students to participate, so that being said, it allowed everyone to be free from their class. Technically speaking, it was just like you went to school today only to hang out with your classmates... and of course, that unescapable friend of yours who has been nowhere to be seen for 3 hours now after you last saw each other in the locker area.

"You could've sold some of your collections, man" your classmate named Yeonjun said to your other classmate named Soobin. You three were sitting at the kiosk, doing a multiplayer game for the third and final round.

"I know, but it's hard if I'm not fully decided to do it. I know some were just a waste of space in my room, but at the same time I couldn't let it go because it was too special to me. Those were original qualities, guys" Soobin replied while moving his thumbs around the screen of his phone.

"Man, if only I have that much of a money I would've bought yours right away. Your One Piece figurines were sick man." Yeonjun said. "We're friends anyway, Bin. Can you just give it to me if you al-"

"Hep hep! Nah, that's the line there. Yes, I can borrow it to you though but giving it away... I can't waste that much of a money by just giving it away." Yeonjun declined. "No offense, man."

"It's fine I was just kidding anyways." Soobin rippled his lower lip. You were still listening to their conversation while your concentration remains intact to the game which was effective to bring yourselves into victory.

"Nice one, YN! Good game guys."

"Well that was easy."

"Good thing their team wasn't that skilled, haha." You said before turning off your phone.

"Hey, lets go visit those booths there. I'm getting invested to see what they have in store for the students to buy. Lets go?" Soobin suggested. You and Yeonjun agreed, leaving the kiosk and walking your way towards the open ground in front of the accountancy building.

You've seen the products from those student entrepreneurs that indeed holds up various reasons on why these should be bought and gain and income to this idea they had.

From milkshakes, to old clothes, to jewelries and many more... the students have many to choose.

There were some other booths that only provides entertainment service for students to try, and the example you were seeing at is this booth that gives everyone an opportunity to do a-

"Wedding pictorial?" Yeonjun reads the placard. "So... does this mean-"

"They need two students, one each for boys and girls that can act as two wedding couples for a pictorial."

"Oh I see, so this is simply for students who wants to take a chance to have a pictures with their crushes but in a daring way, huh." You elaborated.

"Like that."

The three of you saw a female student and a male dressed in a tuxedo and a wedding gown with flowers on their hands. They went to a stand that shows a background suited for a wedding.

All of the students cheered and screamed in flattery as they witnessed the two seem to like each other mutually and finally have a picture with each other.

As they were finished, they removed the props, and you followed the sight of the girls, and you figured out that it was one of Miyeon's classmates who was also at the booth with you.

"Both of us had our picture now, come on Miyeon you can't be the only one left behind!" one of her classmates named Soyeon shook her arm.

"B-but I don't have a crush-"

"Then just fake it out and look for somebody! We should all be fair with each other so you better find one for you too, Miyeon."  her other classmate who just previously tried the pictorial named Yuqi insisted.

While there's other students who are having a picture in the booth, that gave Miyeon a few more time to find. Fortunately, as she roamed her eyes, it landed on a perfect option that she had.

Actually, it was pretty stupid that she didn't think of this guy knowing that he's the only boy she's close with.

Miyeon ran and tugged your arm while you are observing the toys displayed from the other booth.

"W-what the- Miyeon?"

"Follow me!"

"Eh? W-where are you taking me you crazy girl! Get your hands away!"

You tried to remove her arm but despite of this girl's thin physique, her grip is actually strong and unescapable.

You concede defeat as she pushed you to the booth where the same wedding concept is being done.

"Oh no." You immediately answered and tried to leave but Miyeon blocked your way.

"Pleaseee~ just one, YN." Miyeon looked up at you and pleaded.

"Miyeon we could have a picture but not in this?!"

"My classmates wants me to try it too, I'm the only one in the group who doesn't have one yet. Can you help me?"

"Miyeon, I said no. Where are they? I'll talk with them."

"Pleaseee, YN? Just once, promise! Let's try this."

"Miyeon, this is just for people who have feeli-"

"Hey, are you two gonna take the turn or what?" One of the student entrepreneurs asked irritably, interrupting your conversation.

"I'll make it up to you, I swear." Miyeon quickly whispered. "For now, let's get married and be my groom."

"Whaaa?"

"We'll take it!" Miyeon yelled and the crowd cheered, including your respective classmates who are very intrigued and supportive with this.

"OOOHHH YES! LET'S GOOO YN!"

"AAAAAAAAA YN?! I KNEW THAT IT'S HIM, MIYEON!"

"Look what you did." You hissed as you dressed yourself up

"Hehe, oops." Miyeon fakely made herself accountable.

You and she walked outside the backroom and stepped out with your props. The photographer directed you both to stick at each other very close and pretend like you two just married each other today.

Miyeon cuddled your arm, and you slowly pressed the side of your head against hers. Everyone was just shrieking and howling in madness at how unaware they were that you both looked incredible together.

You glanced Miyeon aside for a moment, and you saw her large grin on her face and her supple touch on your arms as you viewed her in a wedding-like attire. She was undeniably magnificent and gorgeous. How much more if you saw her up close with you in a real wedding gown, having her married with you?

Your eyes widened and then blinked rapidly as you sweeped away that thought. You began asking yourself mentally why did you even had that kind of idea? She's your friend, damnit. That was a curse directed for yourself.

"Kid, are you good now?" The photographer asked for clarification.

"Y-yes, sir."

"Alright, on three. One, two, three!"

The camera flashed as the photographer captured an image of you and Miyeon together. You were confused about why the screams went louder after that.

You both removed the props before you joined Miyeon to look at the picture.

In your bewilderment, you saw a result far from what you were expecting.

Miyeon changed her pose in the last second, where she faced you and pursed her lips while closing her eyes, almost touching your cheek.

As you looked back at Miyeon. She nodded and hummed in satisfaction.

"Well, that worked." She gave you a thumbs up before she immediately ran back to her classmates who began to tease her more. You just stared as she disappeared in your eyes, not minding Yeonjun and Soobin teasing you also, as you were so preoccupied with what just Miyeon did to you.

When you two walk yourselves on the way home, you and her would just talk again at each other about some topics that would have yourselves get related with.

"Wait, can you wait here for a second? I'll just have to buy a medicine." She excused herself as she went through the pharmacy store where you two just stopped in front of.

You waited for her like she told you to, gradually browsing at your phone for a while before she returns back to your side and continue walking along with her.

Reaching the roads where you and her would be seperating ways, she faced you as you led yourselves at the corner of the sidewalk.

She reached for her pocket and opened her wallet where she reached and placed on her hand the fake wedding picture you two had earlier and lend it to you.

You felt a bit awkward facing her after what happened earlier. You thought she won't gonna make a reference of it during your talk with her so you decided to just go with the flow instead but here you two are and there's no dodging it now.

"About earlier, I'm sorry for what I did." Miyeon said as you reached the picture from her. "I thought that it will make it realistic so I tried, but ofc I know that would be entirely against you so... I just pretended like I would give you a kiss. But still, thanks for joining me despite how I humiliated ourselves earlier."

You looked at the picture again then at her. "I wasn't angry about it, Miyeon. Don't overthink about it. I do like it though. Atleast in ours, we put a little twist so yeah... I like it."

Miyeon nodded and smiled in relief. "That's good. Okay, well let's go home now. See you tomorrow! Bye, YN!"

"Bye, Miyeon. Be safe." You smiled and waved back at her as you two went to your directions.

After Miyeon enters her house, she smiled and was overwhelmed that you also share the same approval of that moment you two just shared.

4 MONTHS LATER

You and Miyeon just finished your third year in college. Only a year remains before you and she finally finish your studies and achieve that master's degree that will help you both further label yourselves as professionals in your chosen specialization.

However, this may be a thrilling and more encouraging year for the both of you. But bad luck made its entrance into your lives when things started to transform into a difficult situation for you two.

"You got it?" You asked Miyeon and shown her the registration form in your hand which you will receive after filling up the enrollment form that will be presented to you after reaching your turn in the line.

"Yeah, I have it." Miyeon softly waves the piece of paper in her hand.

"Let's go, where do you want to eat first?" You asked her as you joined her side as you leave the building.

"At the-" Miyeon lets out heavy breaths before continuing, but it was still uncomplete when she elicited another batch of heavy breaths in between. Her speaking has gone low because of her volume either.

"Miyeon, are you okay?" You asked her worriedly. Based on your observation she looks so exhausted, dried up and lame. Her face just shows pale expression and no sign of uplift at all.

"I'm good. I'm good, thanks for as-"

"Miyeon? MIYEON!" You suddenly exclaimed when Miyeon collapsed beside your leg. You kneeled and inspected her, her eyes are still open but barely moving.

Raising up her arms and gently tapped at her face, you asked her once again. "Miyeon, hey. Stay awake, okay? Here, drink some water."

You offered your tumbler which still has coldness on the water inside. You helped Miyeon to drink, lifting the container and hold it in place to support her mouth.

Carrying her with ease, you brought her down in one of the benches which you helped her fix her sitting position. You wiped the sweat around her neck, head and arms and used the folder of your documents as a handfan to give her more air.

"You okay? How are you feeling, Miyeon?"

"I-I don't know, I just got tired... again.' Miyeon unenergetically responded. You probably guessed that she was very nervous and the hot atmosphere of this sunny afternoon wasn't contributing well to her state that's why she got drained immediately from the amount of heat and stress she had to endure.

"I'm going to take you home, okay? Let's just go out some other day. You have to rest for now." Miyeon just nodded understandably. You crouched in front of her, your back facing her.

"Hold onto me, I'll piggyback you."

"But YN, I can walk-...."

"Don't make me repeat again, Miyeon."

Miyeon placed her arms around your neck and you tightened its lock before you placed your hands underneath her thighs as you carried her body until you got both of you grab a ride on a bus.

Knocking in her house, her mother answered the call. She became very concerned just when she saw you having her daughter who looks very unwell.

"What happened to her?!"

"She just collapsed when we are about to exit the school, Mrs. Cho. I figured she was very dizzy and intensely tired. Have she eaten already?"

"She did took a lunch but I don't know she got weak. Oh, no. Could it be... a-anyways I'll take care of this here. Thank you for escorting my daughter, YN."

"You're welcome, Mrs. Cho." You gently bowed before you slowly lowered down Miyeon on your back with her mother helping her.

"I-I'm sorry, YN..."

"No, get well soon Miyeon. Take care of your health for now. We can have it again next time." You patted her head before you left her with her mother.

As a commitment to your promise for her, you went out in the weekend just a day after Miyeon had a proper rest. You enjoyed your free time with her through strolling outside and explore new places where both made more moments together.

While you and her were taking a break after hours of shopping at the grass outside the mall where the playground for kids were also located, you were just watching videos on Facebook while eating your ice cream when you felt a weight on your shoulder.

You glanced to the side, witnessing Miyeon who already fell asleep with her head laying atop of your shoulder.

Her phone was left open in her phone, displaying her home screen, but what struck you the most is that the wallpaper she's using was a picture of you and her from the recognition day of your classes, holding your respective medals hanging around your neck.

You were touched that she's making reasons to express how proud she is to see you as her beloved friend, but you can't depict if that's the same reason brought by the happiness you were feeling after seeing your photo with her.

Your hand reached up to her newly dyed pink hair and gently stroked it, swaying some strands that were blocking her face and there she was, her full beauty exposed only reserved for you to be seen up close.

Here you are again, secretly praising how beautiful and unreal features. If only you could tell this to her straightforward without sounding suspicious, you would've done it right away.

Because she earns it. She deserves every compliments for a nice girl like her.

Even in her asleep, she still manages to look breathtaking. Everything she does is already exceptional for you, and it was just plain insane to think about it.

As you were about to remove the phone from her hand, your hand paused on its movement and just stayed on top of it. It came to your attention that your heartbeat increased, your skin shivered, blood rushed aggressively, and your cheeks were numbing at the red tint forming that you couldn't even see.

Looking back at Miyeon, you created questions inside your head about whether this feeling you're still having isn't mutual to each other's friendship anymore. This time, you are the only one who's starting to grow a deeper admiration and love for her than the friendly relationship you have with her.

You quickly removed your hand from her and placed her phone away for safety. Looking away at her and staring up at the night sky, you gulped and released a heavy sigh at the thoughts forming in your head.

Days later, Miyeon gets to notice that you are beginning to avoid her, either making up excuses not to participate with her, acting cold, or pretending like you don't know her.

It was worse than the attitude he was trying to pull off when she first met you and offered her welcoming friendship to you. She knows that she was just trying to keep your walls up as you think about the decision to let her be close to you because you never experienced having an actual friend to get along with.

But this time, it was just like you were forcing yourself for no particular or obvious reason. Miyeon was completely clueless as to what drives you to act differently again toward her.

That's why when you joined her after days of not being around her like you always used to do, she couldn't hold her worry and frustration anymore.

You were still silent because you've been sensing Miyeon's unusual blank demeanor. You couldn't able to have her engage in a conversation especially that you are the introverted one. As much as you wanted to talk with her, you instead decided to give her some space as it seems like she's not in a good mood.

"Goodbye, Miyeon. Let's play later if you don't have assignments like me, alright?" You said to her.

Before you're about to continue walking, you heard Miyeon calling your name from behind.

You turned around, and it surprised you to see her eyes with pool of tears, one just dropped across her face.

"Miyeon? What's wrong?" You stepped forward, inching your gap with her.

"What did I do, YN?" She asked you sadly.

"Why are you crying? Tell me, please."

"You keep on ignoring me these past few days like I've done something wrong that I don't even recall doing one. Did I really do one?" She sulked, removing her view as she couldn't bear to stare at you after what you've done to her.

"N-No, you don't okay? I-"

"Then what is it? Everytime I see you away I can tell that there's something wrong. You don't even lay an eye on me if you wanted to or speak fluently if I try you to. Do you hate me now, YN?" Her voice cracked, painfully cracking your heart a bit.

"Please, don't say it like that."

"You're making me feel lonely, YN. When I made myself to be your friend, I thought that we would be nothing but happy with everything. But now, it feels like there's something changing again and I'm confused what to do to keep you from me. Are you gonna leave me, YN?"

"N-No, I don't! Please, listen to me." You hold both of her arms and caressed it. "I just had a trouble about figuring myself. It's in me, you don't have anything to do with it, Miyeon. That's it, and I needed some alone time to figure and settle it on my own."

"Why couldn't you just tell me that you do, YN? You know I would be willing to adjust for you while I wait when you need me fir help. Have you forgot?"

To be honest, you did and that's where it hit the spot of your guilt.

"I'm sorry, Miyeon." You bowed your head.

Miyeon sighed and placed her hand on your shoulder. "Are you being insecure, discouraged of yourself again?"

"W-what?" You asked her, a glimpse of shock was evident when she described accurately what you've been hiding from her.

You just joined her today after you calmed down and solved your problem of making convulsive and negative insights and possibilities of why a girl like Miyeon would never fall in love with you as you are.

This has been the issue why you couldn't find a friend easily. and preventing yourself from getting attached to somebody who marks everything that will win over your interest.

All of it was shattered by Miyeon, and I don't know what to do with this feeling. You had to compose yourself again so that you wouldn't make any slight mistakes that would reveal your admiration for Miyeon and make all of your worries manifest into reality.

"Even if I wouldn't know the reason I can see it through your eyes, YN." Miyeon said. "I told you before and it will remain similar. No matter how much you look down at yourself, it will be nothing to me. I will stay because I wanted to... and you needed it, YN. I've seen you improve and everybody around us could see it. I made myself to be your friend because it was a choice that I never regretted to do."

Miyeon holds your hand and locked it on her hold. Your heartbeat quickened at the touch and her appreciating look she's been giving at you.

"So please, don't regret yourself or me that we met, okay? Be happy and just be free like me, like the time and world is in our hands." Miyeon patted your hand and smiled sweetly.

You nodded and formed an upright curve in your lips in return. "I will."

Miyeon pulled you into a hug, pressing her head on your chest as you snuggled your chin on the crook of her neck. You let yourself be subdued by the warmth of her comforting embrace, and with your grateful prayers and wishes being sent above in heaven, you let a wonderful person like Miyeon enter your life.

That peaceful understanding and make-up that you two had brought back the liveliness and the effects of the dynamics that Miyeon has instilled in you

You proceeded to catch up those few days ago when you separated yourself from Miyeon just so you could get rid again of all these negativities and overthinking that you've been getting ever since that night when you felt different touching Miyeon's hand and how your perspective altered about her beauty.

Treating her to wherever she wants the both of you to try, going around to such places, and even tutoring her about some subjects that she's struggling with.

It was just like what you two always do together, and it was always nice. Something you can't ruin.

However, those good times didn't last much longer when both of you encountered another problem to take seriously, and this might have been the most frightened and anxious you've ever been for Miyeon.

Right as you exited the campus after the class ended, without having your best friend with you, you received a phone call from her mother.

You were notified by bad news that Miyeon was just sent to a hospital today, and she knows you will definitely be coming for her once you know, so she didn't waste more time to inform you.

That's exactly what you did. For the first time, you've never been this panicked after leaving the class. You hurriedly ran and traveled all the way into the hospital that was mentioned to you.

Searching for the rooms, you finally united with her mother, who was waiting outside.

"What happened to her?"

"YN...." Mrs. Cho squeezed your wrists as she cried. You just stared at her as you waited for the next words to come out. "I don't know what to do. I'm scared, I don't want to lose my daughter too."

"Why? Is Miyeon sick? What's her condition?" You asked frantically.

"She is. But I think it's better if you hear it from her and discuss it." Mrs. Cho said. Your chest felt tightened as your body goes weaker at hearing that information. It's been a prediction of yours that there's something wrong with Miyeon ever since she collapsed back in the enrollment day, but you didn't expect that this would've gone worse and that will have you to see her in such inappopriate place for you.

"She's currently resting after the doctors took a check up on her. She'll wake up soon." Mrs. Cho then urges you to go inside the room where she excused herself to buy some food on the convenience store.

As what she said, more than 10 minutes later Miyeon shortly woke up from the hospital bed. You saw her eyes blink carefully and you rushed to her side.

"Miyeon. Hey, buddy. I'm here." You said, placing your hand atop of her torso.

"Y-YN?" Miyeon called your name lamely. "You came..."

"Yeah ofcourse I do, I worried so much about you after your mom called me that you're confined." You kneeled beside her. "She told me that you were sick, Miyeon. Of what? May I know, please? Cause truly, I hate to see you being like this."

"So she already mentioned to you about it." Miyeon sighed and closed her eyes. "Alright, YN. I'll give you the answer. I don't have any more time left to hide this from you."

"What haven't you telling me yet?"

"I'm sorry, YN." Miyeon said, reaching for your hand which you grabbed it and locked it on your hold. "I'm sorry if I'm... going to make you sad."

"I don't care about it, Miyeon. It's just a part of our life. Happiness isn't the only mood that exists, we also go through dark times in our phase. And I believe it's better to be sad at something I know than assuming something that is not." you said to her.

Miyeon smiled at you. "You really are okay now..."

"I always think of you, that's why. It wouldn't be possible if it's not because of you, Miyeon. You inspire me to be better."

Miyeon's teardrop fell from her eye as she nodded. "I know, and you encourage me to fight for what's right. That's why I'm still trying to take care of myself on battling my heart condition."

Your whole senses felt like it zoomed away from your conscience as you intepreted the enormous state of shock that ever striked on you after learning what Miyeon just revealed to you.

"A what?"

"My heart... it isn't what you think, YN." Miyeon tightlipped. "Even my lifeline."

"W-what do you mean? Y-you... Miyeon, so this is..."

"I had it since I was born, YN. My father had it, and now you know why he wasn't around anymore with me and mom." You tilted away to avoid that truth. "I inherited his condition and it was passed through me YN and what happened to him, I can have it too. The doctors thought before that I won't be going to reach 20's... but it's a miracle that I'm still fine, yet again it happened to me again and now I'm thinking twice now if-"

"No, no. Miyeon, you say that your time is limited but like you said, look at you. You are 26 years old now. 6 years, you surpassed that supposed end of the line for you. That means, you can still handle it whenever it occurs, and you will be going to be fine in repeat." You said to her. "As long as you continue living, all you have to do is to enjoy the rest of it."

"About that, I was reminded of something that I can share to you too." Miyeon smiled at the recall while looking softly at you. "I knew I had to do it, when I learnt that it's bad for me to apply pressure on myself, I always remind myself to be joyful and calm. Until I saw you..."

Miyeon rubbed her hand on top of yours, soothing you. "Lonely, gloomy, bland. You were the opposite of me, and I hated to see the very thing that I am preventing myself to be at. Do you know the other reason why I became so interested to meet you, YN?

It's because you helped me realize how can I use my happiness and the remaining time I have with a purpose. That's why I pushed myself to become your friend, YN. I want to accomplish one last thing in my life, and that is to make you happy just as I did to myself.

So please, promise me. Once I'm gone, continue to put smile on other's faces, but don't ever forget about sparing one for yourself, YN. For now... stay, and continue to show me how I've changed you."

You shed your tears that you couldn't contains fron the emotions forcing to escape inside of you. It sucks so hard that you reached the point and such unlikeable scenario that you have to witness and listen to your friend sending her final wishes to you just in case her suffering conquers her.

"Can it still be saved through a surgery?"

"I think so. They did it on my dad, before... but I don't know if it will be successful on me unlike him." She shrugged.

"We don't quite sure, then." You understood. Miyeon wiped your tears with her hands, you curled it and laid your head on her knuckles. "It still doesn't matter to me. I'll never leave, Miyeon. I'll be here to support you anytime. That's what.... friends are for, right?"

You took a pause before saying the word. You've been wanting to improve more than that, but you had to remain cautious.

Both grinned at each other. You joined Miyeon to rest again until Mrs. Cho arrived back at the room with the packed foods in her hands.

A few days ago, you received news from her mother that she agreed with their relatives to bring Miyeon to the States to undergo her surgery after the recommendation that it was the perfect place with complete equipment to perform the surgery successfully and attain a higher chance of survival for Miyeon.

Although it's saddening that you won't be able to see Miyeon for how long it has to be, you just reminded to yourself that you don't have to be selfish and her health is the number one priority here. It was always been the important part after all this time, and it was so relieving that you were able to help her along despite without your knowledge, which was pretty impressive to realize.

You are now at the airport with your family, joining Miyeon and her family on their departure so that you both can say goodbye properly to each other.

You and Miyeon faced at each other. "I'm going to miss you, YN."

"Me too, Miyeon. Good luck on the surgery, okay? I'll be here waiting for you to come back."

"I am, and you will me better than ever before." Miyeon smiled.

"You should be, because I have a gift for you when you return."

"What could it be? You're making me excited already, YN!"

"It's unique, that's all I can say." You chuckled. Miyeon invites you to a hug and you reciprocated it.

"Goodbye for now, Miyeon-ah. You can do it, okay? Fighting!"

"HAHAHAHA, I'll fight for you, YN."

As she lets go from the embrace, you were dumbfounded when Miyeon performed a quick peck of a kiss to your cheek. Your chest throbs rapidly, mood blooms and ou felt more alive than ever today because of that heartfelt gesture.

"Goodbye, YN! I won't be away for long!"

She waves her hand at you while her mother nods also. Joining your parents, you watched them slowly disappear from your sights as your hopes grew stronger and bigger that she could endure and overcome this challenge she's currently facing personally.

A few weeks later, you were inserting your things into your locker while your classmates Yeonjun and Soobin narrated to you the entire plot of the new game they just bought.

They invited you to join them after you went to the mall to check out the new collectibles and arcade shop that is scheduled to open tomorrow, and you didn't hesitate to agree since you would also be craving to see it on your own.

While you three are conversing, you felt your phone vibrate. Upon checking, it was a phone call coming from your mother.

You answered it right away, excusing yourself to your classmates for a moment and they immediately understood.

"Hello, mom?"

You furrowed your eyebrows when you heard her shuddering breaths.

"Mom?"

"Y-YN..."

"Yes, mom. I'm here. Why did you call?"

"I'm sorry, honey." Her mother was stiffling a sob. "Listen to me first, okay? Don't engage once you hear it-"

"Mom, please. What is it? I'm getting nervous right now. Why are you being like this?" You said anxiously, your breathing starts to go heavy.

"It's about Miyeon, YN." Your mother said. Your fingers went stiff from grasping the phone. "Her mother called me few minutes ago and she told me that... Miyeon's gone."

Everything went blurry, awfully quiet and unresponsive to you as you suddenly crashed in the ground, slipping at the locker door on your back, dropping the phone in your hand. Your classmates and other students around the hallway were startled at what happened to you.

"Hey, YN? Yo, dude what happened?"

"YN, what's wrong man?"

Yeonjun and Soobin were taken aback when you punched the floor and screamed in agony as you let out the hardest cry you've ever released.

As you went home, you were greeted by a comforting hug from your mother as you let yourself weaken and pour out all the pain that you've felt.

That wasn't even the worst part, as you learned next from your mother the additional details of Miyeon's sudden death. She told you that Miyeon, Mrs. Cho, and her aunt were on their way to the hospital when they got involved in a car accident caused by a drunk driver operating a truck.

Mrs. Cho and the aunt suffered injuries, but the large impact of the crash brought a shock to Miyeon that was unable for her enlargening heart to sustain, causing it to fail in functioning and pronounce it her cause of death just now.

A week later at Miyeon's burial, as you just stared brokenheartedly at her newly created grave, her mother approached to you.

"She gave this to me while we're staying at the hotel. Miyeon told me that if ever something bad happens to her, she wants to me to give this you." Mrs. Cho who is more devastated then you, losing both her husband and her only daughter with the same complication,  said as she hands you a white envelope.

You reached it from her and slowly opened it. It was a handwritten letter made by her. You read the contents of it silently.

Dear YN,

            Hey there, my number one buddy! I know I've said to you that I'll come back once this is all over, but still I have made a back up once the unfortunate has come to get me during this battle that I'm having with my vulnerable heart, and if you're reading this right now... I don't want to mention but I have to be clear. This only means that I failed you. I'm gone forever and I won't be back anymore, but whatever happens; it won't stop me for saying what I want to say all dedicated to my one true bestfriend, which is you.

         Thank you so much that even though my proposal of my friendship to you was forceful and a bit threatening, you still gave it an attempt. Look at where we are now, I told you that I would be real for you, and you did the same for me. I think that's the reason why our bond became stronger, because we discovered our flaws with each other and we helped each other to change all of that. As I said, all I want to for you to be better. And you were always a great guy in my eyes, YN. It's a no shocker that I fell in love with you. Tadaaa, now you know my secret. Well, that's one of the reasons why I made this letter, so that I could tell you what I actually feel for you once I couldn't come back and unable to say this to you in person.

        I like you a lot, YN. And I know you do. It's so obvious of you, you know? I find it funny and impressive how you still manage to endure all of that by showing this tough shell of yours. But I get it, I know there' a reason. You're just scared as me. That's why I couldn't confess to you earlier because I know you deserve better. And probably your own reason is that this boundaries and insecuries of yours are still present, maybe that's why you couldn't even face me because you're looking lowly of yourself while believing that you've already fallen for me. It's interesting right? We both share the same thought that we both deserve better. But anyway, I don't mind it. I still have this precious thing and that is called friendship, atleast... with this I could still prove and show to you how I love you with all my heart that will remain stuck on you.

       Before I end this letter, I just want you to do me one last favor, YN. Please visit her grave anytime you want and never forget me. That way, I could take it as an alternate way to see you from above that you love me too.

      Until we see each other again, buddy.

                                                                                                            Love,                                                                                                            Miyeon

You broke down in tears as you fell into the grassy land, just below her grave, filled with a mixture of bittersweet emotions, being delighted, grateful, and touched by her kind and heartwarming remarks about this whole awesome journey you two had been on, while on the other side, there's the guilt, grief, and torment that you didn't get to confess your true feelings to his only best friend and admirer before it was too late, unlike she did.

10 YEARS LATER

You are now currently working as an IT technician in one of the largest programming companies in South Korea.

You may be mostly busy in your professional life, but you still tried your best to allow and reserve free time to connect with your loved ones: your parents, your grandma, your friends Yeonjun and Soobin who now works as game developers, while Soyeon and Yuqi are now one of the most famous performers in SK, Mrs. Cho and her relatives and most importantly: her.

You always visit Miyeon's grave whenever you wanted to, just like her final request which you remember every single day.

Today is her birthday, you went to her grave last after all of her loved ones visited her earlier.

You looked down on her grave, the expensive tombstone standing on it with a lovely picture of her back in college placed on a frame.

                                                CHO MIYEON      Gone but never forgotten as she remains alive within our hearts forever.

                               January 31, 1997 - July 25, 2023

You placed the birthday cake and some balloons that you're bringing with you beside her tombstone.

"Happy birthday, Miyeon." You greeted her before lighting up the candles.

"10 years and counting now, huh. But I'm still here just like you asked me too. I stayed, and I'm still waiting patiently for my time to come where I can see you again someday." You said, your nose gets stingy as your eyes starts to become watery.

"Thank you for existing and having the pleasure to meet you, where you taught me how is it like to have a true friend... and to fall in love with you. It was all once in my imaginations, so thank you... for bringing it all to reality, even though... it didn't last longer as we expect to be."

You recalled all of the memories that you had with her, but what struck you the most was the necklace you're wearing.

You opened the locket, revealing that it was your fake wedding couple photo with her back in college, which was actually her last gift to you along with the letter she wrote from you inside the envelope given to you by Mrs. Cho 10 years ago. It's such a wasted wish that you won't be able to recreate this moment with her. If she ever did come back, you would've shown her the gift of your love for her, given her a chance to be your girlfriend, proposed to her, and married her without any pretend. Miyeon would be such a lovely wife to have, for sure.

As you looked at her appearance, you also remembered that time back at the mall where she slept on your shoulder. The picture she had on her wallpaper at that time was also the one you're using now.

It brought you back to your very first hug with her. Your eyes sprung up, and the familiarization hit you as you compared it to the same scenario you dreamt before, and up until now, it still is.

But what's even better now is that you can see the girl's face now. and it felt even more realistic than before. Same structure, same pinkish hair, same colorful dress.

Your eyes swelled before they broke down into tears, lowering your head as you cried in your palms.

It went on for minutes until you calmed down and ate the cake for her while watching your recorded moments with her on your phone.

You were so invested in all of those happy memories you were revisiting that you didn't notice a stranger peeking at you from behind.

"Awww your girl is so beautiful, dear." The old lady says with a soft smile. You looked above to see her figure.

"Thank you." You bowed your head.

"So that's her name?" She said as she reads Miyeon's tombstone.

"Yes, she's Miyeon." You politely answered.

She hummed and frowned. "It's unfortunate that she passed away too soon. She looks so young." You smiled through the pain as you wiped your tears. "We're just the same, I visited my late husband today on our wedding anniversary." She pointed at the direction where it is located.

"That's sweet grandma." "Are you okay now, dear? I know it hurts a lot to lose somebody we love, but trust me, it won't make us feel better if we don't practice how to let go." You nodded while trying to end your cries as the old lady is now caressing your arm to console you. "I am. I've already accepted her fate."

"You surely must have miss her so much, don't you? I bet you think about her anytime."

You looked at Miyeon's picture and smiled with pure confidence. "Yes, I do. She is and always will be on my mind... because Miyeon is the woman of my dreams."

#chomiyeon #gidlemiyeon #miyeon #gidle #gidlemiyeonxmreader #gidlemiyeonxmalereader #gidlemiyeonxfreader #gidlemiyeonxfemalereader #gidlemiyeonxreader #gidleoneshot #gidleau #gidlefanfic #gidlemiyeononeshot #gidlemiyeonau #gidlemiyeonfanfic #kpopau #kpoponeshot #kpopfanfic

[toastingpencils37]

Just want to rant a little about Nya's form holding ability while she was the Sea.

In Seabound right as Wojira is defeated, Nya talks about not being able to easily maintain her shape, saying that it was what she was. And I'm actually going to ignore the "what I was" part and what it means, because even though Crystalized did follow through with that and made her a dragon as her season debut, the end of Seabound did not.

This post is about the physical technicalities of her holding her shape, not the meaning of her forms. (Though I talk about the meaning a teensy bit because reasons)

Anyways, back to my rant, at the way end of Seabound we see her in her humanoid form swimming with the whales, apparently having no issues with keeping her shape.

Notice the difference between the two scenes? In the scene where Nya was speaking with Jay, she was above water, and struggling to hold her form. Whereas at the way end of Seabound, she was in the ocean, within her element, having no struggles at all.

Now let's skip a year later to Crystalized. When Nya reverts from her dragon form to her humanoid form, she has no apparent struggle holding her form. (Which also does show that the dragon form for her was something more mental than physical, signifying her disattachment from her actual self)

Whereas when Nya goes up to the Lighthouse, we notice her begin to loose her shape a minute or two in, struggling to get back. Which is noticeably shorter and more severe than when she first became the Sea. Because at the end of Seabound, sure, she does a slight ripple that shows her instability, but it is slight, and Nya is able to keep it in check. Whereas in Crystalized, when she does that ripple, it quickly becomes severe to the point where she just becomes a puddle.

And then, later at the Monastery, we notice Nya struggle to hold her shape yet again. And this time, she starts to loose her shape a lot faster than she did at the lighthouse.

Which in that case may also be due to how far she is from the Sea. Because at the Lighthouse, she was actually pretty close to the Sea. Whereas at the Monastery, she was much further. And due to the increased distance between herself and the Sea, her connection becomes more fragile, causing her to not be able to hold her form as well.

(Then that also goes into the question of what would happen if Nya lost her form, and whether she'd just rematerialize into the Sea or stop existing. But moving on from that)

Now let's briefly talk about Nyad. Because compared to Nya's year as the Sea, Nyad has been the Sea for millennia. And if a year as the Sea drastically affected Nya's ability to keep her form while away from it, imagine how that millennia affected Nyad's ability. She might not even be able to go away from the Sea.

Not that she'd probably want to. Because honestly, her being in the Sea that long probably affected her ability to remember as well. We notice that Nya actually remembered pretty easily, but when she tried to talk to Nyad about Nyad's identity, she really did not care. Meaning that Nyad probably doesn't have much capability to remember who she once was anymore. Which also means that she won't have any motivation to ever leave the Sea.

And even though we know that she appears to in a way be more in touch with her former self, being in a form closer to what we guess used to be her Merlopian form, this slight closeness seems to show that her identity as the Sea is more closely tied with "Nyad", than Nya's identity as the Sea is tied with "Nya".

(And now for a bit more headcanony type shit, but Crystalized may have possibly not been the first time Nya remembered who she was. For all we know, there may have been a couple other times something triggered her memories, but before she was able to follow them and try to come back, she got distracted by whales or something and just left. And based on how the longer you are in the Sea the less of a chance you have at remembering and going home, Nya probably had more instances of this in the first few months after becoming the Sea, which slowly dwindled down as more time passed)

Anyways, rant done. That's all. Just had to get all this shit out there.

#ninjago #nyad ninjago #nya ninjago #ns14 #ninjago seabound #ns15 #ninjago crystalized #ninjago the endless sea #ninjago wojira #i am definitely using the headcanon part for a fic

[marky4l]

tour blues

pairing: lee donghyuck x fem reader

wc: 2.1k

genre: smut

warnings: canon compliant lol, hyuck and mc let loose during tour, mild degradation (mild I think), choking (brief), spanking (once), hyuck is mean, mc is a brat

hi, i had a thought and wrote for a few hrs and decided if i put something out it would be this lol. veryyy brief and just self serving & gratuitous

–

“it’s been hours.”

you pout petulantly, legs crossed from your seat on the dressing room couch. you watch your boyfriend pause from his position at the door, closing it and locking it gently. he’s handsy with the high collar of his tour outfit—an elaborate mess of jewels and baubles, shiny with every step.

you clear your throat. “hours, hyuck.”

“baby, i couldn’t control the post-show happenings. okay? there was a photoshoot, a meet and greet with a few fans, drinks—i couldn’t escape.” he’s growing impatient with the fact that his outfit isn’t coming loose and he grunts. 

“fuck, then.” you spout. “i hate tour.”

“you do not.” he pulls and a button comes loose. it’s still stuffy but much less so, and he breathes in relief. 

“i do. i’m like a fucking groupie.”

“well, when you tag along i get to have a dressing room to myself, so how about we count our blessings?”

you roll your eyes, sighing loudly so he can hear your annoyance. he turns, hands busy removing the buttons and decorations from his top. “you want to smoke?”

“no,” you say, but you get up to rifle through his things anyway. you find the blunt instantly, and then the lighter on his dressing room table. “where’d you get?”

“mark,” he responds. “what’d you think of the show?”

“it was great except for that one guy… haechan? dunno if you know him.”

he chuckles, poking his tongue into his cheek and walking over to the couch. he sits down, spreading his legs slightly and depositing the pile of fabric beside him. he’s just in a white polo now. you flick the lighter awake, staring at him. 

“what?” you say sharply.

“jeez, bitey. c’mere. and don’t light the spliff yet.”

you walk over to him until you’re in between his legs, and his arms loop around your thighs in a loose hug. “i’m tired,” you whine.

“you’re not.”

“i am.” you jerk your knee so it almost hits his chin. 

he tuts. “you know what you are? you’re wet.”

you grumble, because he’s right. “wet,” he says again, “and wearing my favorite skirt.”

“way to take a hint late.” and it’s true, it is his favorite—a black miniskirt, that fell high above your knees. donghyuck always had a thing for seeing you in skirts. the tight sweater you wore didn’t do much to neutralize how revealing it was.

you’d worn this skirt a bunch of times, and each one ended with you bent over, legs spread, fucked within an inch of your life. 

“take a seat, baby.” he pats his lap.

“corny,” you retort.

he grunts. “difficult.” 

“well, i am tired.” he laughs, glancing away and rolling his eyes. 

“you’re not tired. you had hours to rest which—you probably did. and you’ve been going shopping around with my card, haven’t you?”

“i am,” you repeat brattily, even if he’s caught you.

he leans back and sighs. “you’re not going to get fucked that easily.”

“who said i wanted to get fucked?” you splutter.

“same person who said you needed to act like such”—he tugs the blunt from your grip—“a fucking brat tonight.”

“tch,” you say weakly. you reach over to run a hand through the pile of baubles he’d disattached from his polo. “your tour outfits are unnecessarily scratchy.”

“mmm, they’re pretty. don’t change the subject.”

“hyuck,” you whine, and it fizzles into silence. you sigh. “please.”

his lips curl upwards. you never even have to ask, he always knows. he slips the spliff in between your lips and you purse them to make sure it doesn’t fall. “go ahead, light it,” he urges, his hands gripping your thighs tight. one of them creeps upwards and you shiver, bringing the flickering flame up to your lips.

“that’s a good girl. on my lap.” he lets go of your thighs.

you take a drag and climb onto his lap, and already you can feel the outline of his cock through his pants. “see, you can listen. when you’re not running your mouth being so difficult you get what you want, right? all pretty and good for me.”

he leans over to kiss your neck, hands on your waist and under the hem of your sweater.

“well, maybe i don’t wanna be good,” you hum, holding the blunt in between shaky fingers. you feel his smile before you hear his chuckle, his lips stretching slowly against the base of your throat.

“oh?” he takes the blunt to take a drag and then deposits it onto the ashtray beside the couch, sighing out in a billow of grassy smoke. “really, now?”

you shake your head, toying with the buttons on his shirt. you can’t keep your hands still. you can still feel his cock, thick and impossibly hard, pressing right against the center of your thighs as you shift, straddling him more comfortably.

the thing with donghyuck—and you, and tour as a whole, really—is that both of you often get exhausted just dealing with shit. for him, it’s tour; for you, it’s the stress of tagging along and staying hidden from the public. sometimes you like to alleviate the exhaustion by letting him take care of you, staying docile and sweet. other times—more tired times, much like now—you want him to beat it out of you and make you cry.

he pauses, thumbs rubbing against your ribcage. your face is so warm. “stand up.”

you scramble to untangle the limbs, retrieving your knees from where they’d settled into the couch cushions and stretching your legs again. you lace your fingers together, and donghyuck takes them into his, kissing the tips. “did you touch yourself while i was gone?”

“on—on the couch,” you stutter. “just, it was after the show ended. and it w—”

“quiet.” he pauses and you follow. his hand pats the couch he’s on. “right here?”

you nod.

“out in the open?” he chuckles, eyes turning to the empty spot beside him. “slut.”

“donghyuck!” you protest.

his gaze flits to you again, dark. “i didn’t ask you to speak, sweetheart.” you pout but stay quiet anyway, flexing and unflexing your fingers in anticipation. you feel his hand at your knee, inching higher and higher until it’s at your inner thigh. you shiver. 

“you touched yourself right here?”

you nod, lips pursed. you want him so bad. he swats your thigh. “words, angel.”

“yeah,” you say breathily.

“were you thinking of me?”

you purse your lips again and hum. “i don’t—can’t say for sure.”

“you’ve got quite the mouth.” you’re dating the most conniving, infuriating son of a bitch. “who were you thinking of, then?”

“could be anyone, y’know,” you say in faux nonchalance. “tch, it could be anyone who could fuck me better.” his fingers press against your damp panties and you whimper. you’re both still fully clothed and he’s got you around him like a desperate whore.

“really? give me a name, angel. use your words if you still have the brain for it.” the mean edge gets to you and you moan, gripping his wrist. his fingers are rubbing at the fabric now, and the friction is going straight to your head. 

“a—a name?” you pause, trying to find control in the haze of his talented fingers. 

“that’s right,” he hums, stopping his ministrations. “turn and bend over.”

you follow, your hands finding purchase on the table in front of the couch. you’re hyperaware of the fact that donghyuck can see your underwear, lace and light and pretty, so light in fact that when you’re soaked, your pussy can be seen right through the material. he grunts behind you and lets his thumb run over it.

“a name,” he repeats firmly. “we’re gonna be here all night, thanks to you.”

“uh, who could fuck me better?” you mull out loud, trying not to stutter. “mark, maybe.”

he laughs, but there’s no humor in it, and you can tell you’ve pissed him off even more. you’ve driven your point home—you want to be fucked. “mark.”

“mmm. he could fuck me good, i bet. isn’t he packing?”

“jesus, you dirty girl.” he swats your ass and you yelp. “look at this.” he pulls your pink underwear down so rough it almost rips, and runs his fingers over your bare pussy, glistening from how wet it is. your knees tremble around your panties—they haven’t drooped down to your ankles yet. “your cunt’s dripping because of mark?”

“yeah,” you croak. he lands a slap right against your bare cunt and you fail to conceal the (borderline pornographic) moan that escapes your mouth. 

“face me.” you rush to do it—the thought of getting fucked is enough to make you dizzy. you spin, nearly tripping from the underwear bunched up around your ankles (now.) “eager, are we?”

“hyuck,” you whine.

“i’m just joking, angel.” he unbuttons his pants and tugs his cock out, almost fully hard. fuck, it’s big. your hands itch to wrap around it, mouth near salivating. he strokes it with one hand, using the other to stroke your thigh.

“please,” you beg. “need to feel you.”

“need to feel you,” he mocks. “christ, where’d all your fight go, princess? when’d you decide to become good for me, huh? get over here.” 

you kick your panties off and climb onto his lap, hovering above his cock. his grip on your hips stops you from lowering any more. you whine and grumble but he doesn’t let up, sliding a hand to roughly tug your sweater up. “shut up,” he says.

“fuck me,” you respond.

“i don’t fuck brats. stay still.” your movements cease a little, and you wait, antsy. he grips your waist tight and slowly lets you sink onto his cock.

“ah,” you moan. “ah.” you writhe, hands gripping his shoulders to somehow redirect the burn of being stretched out.

“stay,” he grits out, “fucking still. and take this cock. like you said you wanted to.”

“i’m taking it,” you whine. it feels so good and it’s so much of it, tears welling up behind your tightly hut eyes. “i’m trying, hyuckie, fuck.”

“take it better. s’all you’re good for, hmm? cockslut.” you whine aloud, the senses getting to you, bombarding you like a freight train at full speed. you can only feel donghyuck, his hands, the burn of being stretched sizzling into a pleasure that sits well in your stomach. 

“fuck, i—hyuckie, it’s—i can feel in in my, ah, in my stomach.”

his hand comes up to wrap around your neck and you can feel yourself clench around him, growing wetter by the second. he thrusts up into you and you cry out. he’s going so fast. “this is what you wanted. to have this cunt stuffed by a nice fat cock. huh? answer me.”

“yes,” you babble, but it’s muffled and strained. “i wanted this. wanted your cock.”

“but your big mouth spoke up and suddenly you wanted mark’s? what, one isn’t enough for a slut like you?”

“i’m sorry,” you whine. “‘m sorry i said that. i—i didn’t mean it, hyuck.”

“i don’t care,” he mumbles, grinding upwards and his cock is reaching you so deep you can see stars. “you still said it.”

his hand drops down to rub against your clit and you seize, moans tapering off into whimpers. “ah! fuck, hyuck! i want to come, i—” you try to focus on one thing, but it’s all too much. “can i come? please, hyuck, please.”

“yeah, baby, come for me. thaaat’s it,” he urges when you let loose, finishing all over his cock. “getting hyuckie’s dick all wet. budge up, angel. i’m gonna come, shit.”

“inside,” you beg tiredly, leaning forward. his lips press against your neck, covered in a sheen of sweat. “want your cum in me.”

he curses against your throat and thrusts once, twice, before spilling inside you. “ah,” he moans. “fuck, so tight for me, princess.” the feeling has you shivering all over again and you press a kiss to his jaw. you feel him smile.

“you were so good. did everything so well.” you nod along to his encouragement, exhausted.

you pull back and lean forward, foreheads pressing together. his makeup is half off, eye glitter ruined. you chuckle. “i want a shower.”

“when we’re home, sweetheart,” he muses. “you really were so perfect. so pretty.”

you open your mouth to respond but the door rattles in a noisy knock. “hey, nymphos,” mark hollers from the other side, so loud it’s barely muffled. “when you’re done with your fuckfest, the pizza you ordered is here and everyone is sharing it.”

donghyuck turns to you. “you ordered a pizza to a concert venue?”

“sue me,” you mumble, but he’s kissing you before you finish your sentence.

“my dream girl.”

–

#lee donghyuck smut #haechan smut #donghyuck smut

[frostbite-the-bat]

Your roblox pngs are so gosh darn cool!! Never seen em done like that before, the poses are so fluid and the lightings just right. What's your process like?

gaah!! thank you so much! it's actually a little less conventional than you'd think - but it works for me! idk how others do it anyway, i figured this out on my own. THIS guide will be a bit messier because it's late and i was talking to others during this but... hopefully it'll help!

i actually use the pose editor in a roblox game (or EXPERIENCE i ur roblox itself) named 'catalog avatar creator'. it exists to create and preview outfits - but you can also take cool pics in there an customize your poses (and even your items!)

you can even change background to various greenscreens, so that helps! i use this regularly to plan oufits before i may want to buy them! for example i haven't even bought the things for the tv head avatar i showed.

bu anyways, lemme show you how i do my pngs or 'renders'!!

first you either make an outfit in there... or just use your regular avatar! my current avatar is my silly space kitty i concepted in this game, so i'll use that to demonstrate.

FIRST you wanna click here on the sparkle button i masterfully highlighted in mspaint

2) and right away you see the pose editor!! click it!!

okay, at first glance THIS MAY BE SCARY!! but if you're even LIGHTLY familiar with even the most basic of like... 3d stuff WHICH I KNOW NOT EVERYONE IS - you will do swell. a lot of roblox editing things use this sorta system so you might've practiced there before? (i sure have in tprr's animatronic oc editor!)

3) what you wanna do is just select a body part you want to move. it will then highlight on your avatar and you can use the balls to turn em in it's respective axis. some angles will not work as well so move your camera while you do this

(but have a good camera point set in mind! you may wanna do camera trick stuff in your pose depending on what angle you're at. for example i disattach the tail from the body and make it slightly visible on the side. you aren't able to tell! makes it look nicer.)

to MOVE stuff and not just ROTATE it click the little arrows thing! you will move and not rotate that way. just play around with it :] don't be worried to de-attach things - roblox isn't exactly realistic so don't worry to mess around w that!

4) just pose it! go wacky! here's a few things to keep in mind

certain body parts are connected! and ofc, their respective items - i will cover this later.

for example, the pelvis, if moved, moves the torso as well. if you wanna make a floaty pose, move up the pelvis and rotate it first and then the chest (and other parts of the body)

references for poses may not hurt, but being an artist who likes drawing silly poses i'd say i have a DECENT enough grasp of good poses - so that definitely helps with the Flow of my poses you (anon) mentioned! practice makes perfect!

ALSO, you can save poses!

anyways, here's a pose i came up with!

but that's not all! i wanna move the items!

5) well, just click "apply" and re-enter the effects menu!!

then you click whatever you wanna edit and... boom! fancy new window! now you can play around with your item here - i won't explain that, just have fun!

but to move your item around just click "transform item" - it'll bring up the same options you had before while moving body parts!

aand... here's the result!

so, the pose is done... but we wanna prepare it for editing and actually take a picture! well, first, we can't use this background. so...

6) click the gear and then select 'environment' and select a good green, blue or pink screen! i have to settle with what's best since my fella is rainbow. (whatever doesn't clash with the edges of the character is best!!)

here you can also set the lightning! if you go back and pick 'camera & lightning'

I HIGHLY SUGGEST YOU SET A LOW EXPOSURE AS IT MAKES LIGHTER COLORS LESS "FUZZY" AND **WILL** MAKE EDITING IN A SECOND EASIER! it makes it darker but you can edit that, too!

anyways... here's my final product after fiddling with the lightning!

7) take a pic! you can either angle your camera as is which is a bit limited... or... free-cam! which is a bit better but dear GOD is it annoying to control. (tho holding shift makes it less sensitive)

so... here's the final stage we'll do in-game! one last thing i did to make it look better is for a second turn my graphics to max and THEN take a roblox screenshot. (then turn it back down to not deepfry my computer)

honestly, i could've turned the avatar to face the camera with their body a little more when tuning my camera, but i'm not gonna fix that now i don't have much time now LOL let's speed thru this.

8) the TEDIOUS PART. yeeting this into an editing program.

your editing program WILL require anti-aliasing OFF options, a bucket tool and if you really wanna fix issues - a selection tool and just.. layers. and brushes. i use SAI 2 so it's specific to SAI 2.

if you did your camera settings right, you will have a pretty crisp outline everywhere, unless you're me and fucked up here. but this can be fixed. we don't want this fuzz that much

well, i use sai which has a nice bucket tool! i set it to paint with invisible/eraser bucket and adjust the rance of similar color. may take a few tries to get right pick 'similar colored area' or ' all similar colored pixels'.

personally, i pick all similar pixels.

AND TURN ANTI ALIASING **OFF**!! CRISP PIXELLY LOOK

before i do anything tho, i use the selection tool and pick up everything that's the same color as the background in it - being pink.

you can also use the selection pen!

some get tricky and pixel precise... remember if you use sai that the pen is fuzzy - but selection tool is more precise (not the lasso - that's fuzzier too)

here's the goober with all the Protected parts selected. then just invert the selection... (pointing at how u do that quickly)

9) ok NOW you get that bucket tool and just tap at the pink and watch it BE GONE... ofc, make sure you set it to transparent/eraser bucket tool

BOOM. gone. b-but... ENHANCE...!

NOT PERFECT!! CLICK THOSE OFF TOO! remove manually with pixel tool or whatevz if you must

10) look around the edges of the image and look for any fuzz like this... remove it! and if there's any jaggedies...? you can edit those in yourself, usually it's small enough to clear up yourself. (you can also just - save with a diff name, reopen original, copy the section you erased/has jaggedies and paste it into this edited version)

depending on what bg / greenscreen color options you chose (and yoour avatar's colors) and how careful you were... this may take a time to edit! it depends!

also, see texture mess up? depending on the texture and ur skill/patience... goot bye! i usually keep cover ups to simple things like this myself and i can edit things pretty well, too. u can embrace some roblox silliness and imperfections!

10) color adjustments i do to brighten it up...! once i crop the screenshot around the avatar to be a good size i copy it and paste it into the image again

and i set the layer effect of the top pasted image to SCREEN and fiddle with the settings...! (ofc, you can also use other settings - or even the regular color layer settings - but this one's more straight forward to me!)

then i may double check for stuff but... we're done! here's your finished "render" !!!

i don't have time to proof-read this currently, so i hope everything makes sense and there aren't any weird typos or left-overs from previous editing.

hope this was helpful! and not TOO long.

#roblox #guzma plays roblox #tutorial #[answered]

[pochapal]

I shall tempt fate!

Thoughts on the thirteenth doctor?

I didn’t like the era much but 13 is awesome imo ^^

[approximately 1 trillion turrets taking aim] okay SO the thing with 13 is that everyone who watched her and hated her was a needless redditbrained loser who didn't understand a thing. yes she was kind of mid in the end BUT not for a single reason any of her detractors like to espouse.

she was on track for a very good slow burn tragic arc of over-correcting twelve's flaws (he got too attached and this burned him over and over and over again) where in her attempts to protect her companions from the same doomed fate as every previous human to enter the tardis she ends up not showing how she really feels at all until it's too late for it to count because whether or not she's attached or distant all humans die in the end and to travel with the doctor is to in part indulge in a death drive because by nature of being a companion it means eventually you are going to collide face first with tragedy. all the pieces for this are there very much in her first two seasons and this reading even explains why the finales were kind of lacking oomph (her distancing in attachment also extended to Being The Doctor on some level; this could have compounded with all the latent Gender stuff real nicely but didn't) since it was kind of all building to one core tragic break.

this likely would have happened in her third season but then covid kind of destroyed production and obviously every ambition/plan had to be downscaled into flux which was like. fine??? nothing really bad to say about it other than it feels a touch truncated but that was mostly due to pandemic filming restrictions than anything else (and will never be as terrible as the parts of the moffat era which suffered extensively as a result of sherlock existing and taking up the lead writers/producers time and effort). only issue with it was that it shifted tone/direction in a way that kept all of 13's era on this same flat note right at the moment when this naturally should have been shifted up a gear for the third act.

unironically in an ideal world we got a full length third season for thirteen and the one thing that needed to happen was yaz dying. like i liked yaz and everything but girlie needed to die so badly in some episode and for her to die thinking that the doctor never actually cared about her, forcing thirteen to realize becoming disattached doesn't prevent tragedy from happening it just deprives her of love. continuing this ideal scenario the next beat that needed to happen was thirteen absolutely fucking snapping as yaz's death serves as the catalyst for all the other billion emotions she's been pointedly Not Feeling in this incarnation - this in turn would allow us to see shades of the rogue doctor or whatever her name was (renegade doctor? fugitive doctor? exile doctor?) and create an interesting interplay between the two. this'd then lead to an "Oh Fuck I Have Really Fucked Up At Being The Doctor Huh" moment where she starts aggressively Being The Doctor (maybe strongarming dan into being a companion semi against his wishes to fill the void?) and maybe fucking with her own history/reputation or w/e which might've fed into the timeless child mystery thing somehow (don't ask me i'm spitballing on half-remembered information). also identity crisis heartbroken thirteen at the end of her life reaching back into herself and re-using ten's face as a kind of "second chance" at all the parts of herself that ten embodied and she didn't (the absolute love for companions and humanity) where the tension is now whether or not fourteen ignores the literal centuries of history separating himself from the last time he wore this face and that feeding into the new rtd era.

even a small number of these things would have made thirteen probably one of the best doctors in the series in all the metrics that really matter but we didn't get that so we have to contend with what we do have and that was mostly just...okay. thirteen for me is like. she was brimming with potential to go down a certain route i would have eaten up but things never quite fell into place. probably a whole bunch of reasons behind the scenes why thirteen's era fell short of total greatness but i still enjoyed good chunks of thirteen more than certain doctors who i can and will name (doctor eleven they could never make me like you) so she has that going for her at least. also can't be fully mad at the writing because i actually have an unjustified soft spot for chibnall (this is my biases talking but the countrycide episode of torchwood top 1 piece of doctor who media and i'm so mad he didn't lean back into the folk horror aesthetic again for the witch trials episode in thirteen's run) and overall thirteen's era was just. it was consistent. i really wish covid hadn't fucked over the final season so the nascent themes in her arc could've come to a more satisfying fruition because i will always be a forever truther thirteen's era was slow-building up to something really good. the haters will never convince me otherwise.

#coolstuffiseverywhere #my thinking is guided by the sole principle that doctor who is only good when it's both melodrama and tragedy #this might be because i infinitely prefer melodrama/tragedy over scifi. this is also because i am huge brained and beautiful all the time

[star4daisy]

Wife on her duty as a perfect wife i'm!

For the asking game, babe. Give me what i need... 3, 4, 14, 17, 19, 30, 35, and 43 (even tho i already know the answer).

Lov u sfm🖤

omg it was a joke luv <3

3. Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic

I'm the worst person to answer this I have no process sometimes I plan everything out and then write based on that and actually do what I planned, most times the characters take life and change everything and I keep trying to go back to the original plan and sometimes can still fit some things, usually not lol when I have time I just go with the flow and then if I'm interrupted I have to write down what I want to happen next otherwise I will not remember when I open the docs again, on the good days I write without actually thinking about it so I don't remember it well just feels like my fingers can't type fast enough lol very automatic

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

(I think I've answered this before in a better way) everywhere, things come to me at the most random times, usually when I'm daydreaming before falling asleep, sometimes by other books, tv shows or music but mostly it just feels like I spent six years of my life repressing my creative side so I could do physics and calculus so now that I'm letting it loose it's running wild lol

14. how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

I don't write emotional scenes, I can't do emotional or vulnerable therefore neither can my characters which is why I mostly write from Barty/Evan's pov lol it's a different type of emotional I guess I have a dificulty in making my characters say I love you, I just cringe so badly. I don't feel what they feel at all lol and the only personal experience would be from emotions like anger

17. What do you do when writing becomes difficult? (maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)

inspiration never lacks the problem is the lack of time, but when things aren't flowing I stop and go watch something, read or go to the gym until my mojo comes back

19. What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

Morally Ambiguous Characters and Graphic Depictions of Violence

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

sometimes I just post the draft lol I cannot re-read things before posting so the first few people reading are definetly getting screwed over sorry, but then I feel the pressure of having people seeing all my mistakes and it forces me to go polish it

35. What is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain?

question what are his motives and why did he chose that path and maybe not make him one-dimensional like his whole purpose isn't just to go against the hero, make him compelling, make us believe in why he chose that path make us understand him and feel sorry for his motivations, I always like that lol

43. Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

Definetely the first, I'm very disattached to death, I have cried in very few fics and it's not when people die lol sometimes living is more painful so I never expect people to say they cried and when they do I'm always in shock

thx <3 I thought this was gonna be harder lol but maybe I just didn't answer as I should lol

#am I emotionally constipated? #feels like I am after writing this #ask game #author ask game

[damnfandomproblems]

thought about saying this after seeing the ask somewhere but response to 4083, and i'm very sorry to bring it up since it's nagging me; its not just those reasons xiao wouldn't choose venti over liyue, he'd choose anyone for the guarantee of their safety as a guardian.

he'd choose the traveler over an oath and he chose rex lapis out of devotion and he WILL choose venti should trouble come to him but if the latter's presence affect liyue you wouldn't doubt where the priority really needs to go. phrasing it in that way shows a dependency he fell so hard for venti and this is the only major mischaracterization you can put on xiao because he loves someone to go all in and disregarding everything else.

this is the very thing that pisses some (i can't say all, i've never inserted myself into the discourse you said although i personally don't prefer them) xiaoven haters due to the romanticism resulting from two things; venti saved xiao, xiao thinks of the tune of the flute that saved him (not the flutist, which anyone can play for him) and other things that followed the brief interactions they have together.

i value both venti and xiao as their own characters and its the ship interpretation being the very problem the notion's completely ruin how they are in their core. its good to have fun with how you want to portray them, yes, but they've been one of the earliest characters so the first misconception in the name of how Compatible theyve come from a few leaks and hidden lore breaks any consistency that follows after, which then makes their concepts as partners very... off and out of the mark of what they made themselves to be. even their arts, aside how pretty it is, doesn't ring entirely true once you know their backstories as it's veiled by romanticism.

to make their goals in their connection ignores their importance to what surrounds them because its only about themselves now, which is a bit off for a character who symbolizes freedom and disattachment (in a way you're not bounded, you are you and what you choose to be) and a protector who gives his life to anyone who can't manage to save themselves, finding connections more than just one person in the past as he needs to focus on a future.

Posting since this is a response to a previous problem.

#fandom problem 4083 #response to previous problem

[will-the-psychic-type-elite92]

Ya boy woke up in the middle of the night so uhhhhhh

How's about he drops some Summer Stuff.

So what I need to preface with is!!! I write Summer in a pokemon discord server I'm in, and when replayed through GS back in/around September, I would pause at certain points to make a solo post, as my friends who hadn't played GS were excited to see me do it, even encouraging me to pick Summer as my protag in game. Below the cut are my three flashback solos. I had to stop after these because after that I couldn't really keep it objective due to ship bias and having a hard time writing without dialogue as I only had Summer and I obviously picked important story scenes so lmao on my part.

One day I may get enough courage to dump about my personal Summer. The biggest thing to note for the Solos is She's selectively mute and will only speak verbally if the situation calls for it, or she's like deadly serious. Otherwise she uses sign or a notebook and pen to communicate!

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 1: 🎶 》

She'd been....content. The young girl pulling her along--Nema was her name, daughter to the Area Ranger, Rand-- she was energetic and had a spark in her eyes, one visible nearly immediately to Summer when she ran up to her, requesting help with getting one of the "UFOs" out of the water. That, along with her other requests, Summer took joy in doing. Playing along, she decided. She really didn't know how true the three requests thing was, but she couldn't find herself to care.

Besides, she couldn't let that fire burn out of control, nor could she allow Nema to look for her father alone. Really, she was extremely greatful she'd gone along with Nema, all things considered. The pokemon weren't dangerous, no. What she found herself most worried about looking back were the Pinchers there to block the way up to the Wireless Tower.

Now, she knows the extent of how reckless Nema could be, but also how much of a genius she is. While she couldn't doubt Nema's ability to get up to the Tower, shed be terrified to think what could have happened should things have gone awry.

However, one of the two or three the memories that sticks out the most of that day in particular was the conversation she'd had when she finally met with Rand.

The Ranger Union told him two rangers were coming. So, why was there only one? Now he wasn't harsh or angry in the slightest with his question, in fact she'd dare say he broached the topic rather gently for someone who she had just met.

However, something about the question....hit her. It hit her harder than she expected.

Probably because it just...cemented the fact Ben hadn't made it safely to land. Meaning she really had no clue what had happened to him.

In the few moments it took her to raise her hands and give her explanation, so, so many thoughts raced through her head. Had he gotten shot down to? Did they have him captive, tied up with ropes a smidgeon on the tight side? What if it had been worse?

Despite her racing thoughts, she raised her hands and took a deep breath.

I do not know. We had an encounter with the Pinchers in the sky. I had seen them trying to shoot down a pokemon, so I went to stop them. My partner came to assist me. He was going to be shot down, so I knocked him out of the way. I fell into....the ocean....

She had paused a moment, trying to recall. It had been...a blur.

The capture styler got disattached within the fall. I had to get it back. Then there was a strong current. I then awoke on D-O-L-C-E.

She took a deep breath a shook her head. From there, she recounted his she'd met Ukulele Pichu and Booker, before going to find Arley in Rasp Cavern, mentioning the monument being broken, and Raikou chasing the pinchers. Then whet she got to the point she met Nema, the young girl excitedly recounted from there.

Then, before long she had a new mission. Work with Rand, and free the Wireless Tower from the Pinchers

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 1: END 🎶 》

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 2: 🎶》

Raikou had been calmed down. Summer took a few deep breaths as she stared at the legendary beast, who stared back at her. After a moment, it stepped forward and roared loudly. What followed was a bright flash of light.

She heard the crackling of lightning as she stared unblinking, unable to move her hands to shield her eyes, at the light that now enveloped Raikou. She continued to hear the crackling as a shape came into view within the light. It looked…like an hourglass. Once the light subsided, her Styler beeped, which she barely managed to hear over the crackling in her ears, and slowly she lifted her arm, and barely managed to drag her gaze to her Styler.

"The Legendary Pokemon has shown you a shape. Please register the shape."

Slowly, she moved her finger over top her Styler. Start in the top right, making a backwards Z, then up in a diagonal line.

When her Styler beeped in satisfaction, her arm fell, and her gaze was drawn back to Raikou, who then left.

A hand on her shoulder brought her back to reality. The crackling died out as she heard Rand. He was trying to check on her, as she'd been staring off into space.

She blinked twice, and brought a hand to her head, before shaking it.

I am fine. Did you see it? The shape in the light?

///

He hadn't seen it. Had…. She seen it? Or was it really just a trick of the light? She didn't know. They made it down the Wireless Tower, where Leanne and Nema awaited their return.

A very brief conversation was interrupted when some pinchers were brought over and interrogated, at least until they pulled one over on the lot of them and made a mad dash away. At which point Summer and Rand gave chase.

Up until the Big Booker Bridge.

She heard him before she saw him.

Red Eyes.

She wasn't the only one to have that moment of recognition either. He knew who she was.

So, so many things wanted to fall out of her mouth. None of them related to the mission. Selfish as it was her only concern was if Ben was alright in this moment. Before she could raise her hands, Red Eyes expressed his shock that she had lived her fall.

And then Rand took the words from her: Where was Ben?

Summer stared at Red Eyes. A mixture of fear and worry in her eyes. She had every right to fear this man; he'd attacked and she went plummeting to protect Ben. The worry came from what he could possibly answer of what happened to Ben.

Would all her worst thoughts come to fruition? Or would he be okay…?

Then her world crashed.

He couldn't–no, wouldn't– tell her. All because she was a Ranger. Her fists clenched at her sides, and she shakily took deep breaths, trying to keep herself calm.

But, then he continued. One thing? He'd tell her one thing out of pity….? Fine. Whatever.

"He's Safe."

She nearly collapsed right then and there from the nearly overwhelming wave of relief that washed over her in that moment

She was so caught up in her own relief, she'd zone out the last bit of the conversation…mostly. She heard what was being said back and forth; the joke about the rope, that Ben put up a fight, even that he was being treated with some form of respect.

She only really came back to reality when she heard the Voltorbs dropped, and she moved back right before they exploded, leaving the bridge unpassable.

For now, with the knowledge that Ben was safe, she returned to Rand's house with him to think of a new plan to progress.

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 2: END 🎶 》

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 3: 🎶 》

Blue Eyes had been captured in the basement of the old mansion with the help of Pichu. Now she was aboard the Union, and Summer had to give Rand a report, and then give a written report to Murph.

Once the Report had been handed over, the next course of action was going to be decided. However, before plans could be made, Red Eyes showed up, expressing his surprise that they'd managed to capture Blue Eyes.

However, he needed her back, and so he proposed a swap.

Blue Eyes for Ben.

//

When she heard that sentence, she felt so many emotions. Rage that Ben was being used as a bargaining chip, but also hope. Hope and relief that she'd get to see her partner again. Relief that he'd be safe.

Would there be any repercussions for this course of action? She frankly didn't care. What she cared about was getting Ben back. She clenched her fists as she watched Red Eyes fly away, and then she made direct eye contact with Murph.

"Give me Blue Eyes."

Really, she was surprised at how easily Murph was swayed, really he didn't need to be swayed it seemed, he went to get Blue Eyes, and so Summer and Blue Eyes were off to the Daybreak Ruins.

Summer would get Ben back safely today, or she'd raise all hell until she did. Consequences be damned.

//

With Blue Eyes in tow, Summer made her way to the last room of the Daybreak Ruins. Along the way Summer had been stopped countless times by pinchers under Blue Eyes's command, doing all they could to get their leader back without exchanging their captive, however, Summer did push through them.

And at the end of the Ruins…. There was no Red Eyes in sight.

However, a monument was there, and when Blue Eyes went to investigate, a loud roar caused both Summer and Blue Eyes to step back and stare as Entei came down, breaking a rock on it's landing.

Quickly, Summer took to capturing it to calm it down.

Entei had stared her down then roared, and Summer could hear the roar and crackling of a blazing fire as a bright light engulfed Entei. Within that light, she saw Entei's emblem, and just like with Raikou, her Styler beeped.

"Please register the sign in your styler!"

Slowly, she brought her arm up, and over the top of her Styler, she made a straight line down, then crossed like an upside down, closed four, and continued the line over to mirror what she'd just drawn.

As the light faded, so to did the crackling and roaring of a fire. As she blinked a few times, she brought her hand to her her head and shook her head as Blue Eyes grabbed her attention and thanked her for saving her from the situation.

That's when she heard Z.Z. Flyers overhead and stepped back.

Red Eyes was here.

And she could have sworn her heart forgot how to beat for a few moments as she saw Ben. He really was okay. He was okay. She hadn't completely failed in protecting her partner.

Before she could properly respond to Ben. Red Eyes, Blue Eyes and the other pinchers were leaving.

And….of course Red Eyes left the two of them a goodbye present. Electrodes that go boom.

She pushed Ben down, and grabbed pichu and held the mouse to her chest as she threw her arm up to protect her head from the explosions.

She looked around after the ringing in her ears stopped. They were stuck. But that wasn't important.

She instead turned her attention to Ben, who thanked her for her help and mentioned how relieved he was when he'd heard she had been safe.

It was the two of them, the way it was supposed to be from the start.

Now, Summer knew she could handle whatever the future of this mission held for her, now that she had her partner back.

《☀ Summer: Memories, memories 3: 🎶 》

#pokemon ranger guardian signs #long post #my summer has such a complicated relationship with the eyes man #i dont talk about it much but she has varying degrees of anxiety with each of them #but she's also convinced that they're good people at heart especially if they try to change #one of these days i should try to get over my anxiety that ranger Tumblr will come after me and actually dump about my summer shes my blorbo #i love writing her so much #I'm going back to sleep now loves you all /platonic #pokemon ranger summer #guardian signs

[holy-yeosang]

While I was an ARMY still, I "stanned" a bunch of other groups at the sode as well. However, after having droppes out of the Kpop community in 2018 and then coming back in 2020 I have come to found myself to be a solo stan. In the way that I will mainly focus on 1 group, in this case ATEEZ. I mean I still check out other groups that look interesting like XEED and SF9. However, even now, I only mainly listen to ATEEZ Kpop wise. Some times I still go back to listen to music of groups that are no more like B.A.P, CROSS GENE, Sistar, TOPP DOGG, etc etc. I am not sure if I should call myself a Kpop stan if I only religiously listen to one group all the time. I feel disattached from and uminterested in majority of 4th gen groups, which is a shame bc there are a lot of great ones. I don't know what I am blabbering about ngl I am sleep deprived and took in a sleeping pill. I just wonder if only stanning one group these days is looked down upon. Back in my day multistans were the ones who were looked down upon, but recently I have come to notice that people find it weird if you only genuinely like 1 kpop group. Idk, just weird mightnights thoughts. I think of it weren't for ATEEZ I wouldn't have gotten back into Kpop anymore. No regrets tho.

#hamsi.txt

[kalikokat115]

Something I would never fake or lie about are my feelings for you.

I know I left you and leaving was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

I've realized so much things that were hard for me to accept. I put them off for so long and I hoped and hoped and wished and wished that things would change.

But the biggest realization I had to accept was that it wasn't going to change and as much as I wanted it too, I had to leave.

I'm not going to lie, it felt good. Peaceful.

But as time went on, I missed you. As at peace as I was, I wanted the chaos that came with us. I wanted the fights, the arguments, the loneliness, the sadness and anger.

Because as long as I had those, that meant that I would have you.

But I guess that's what comes with toxic relationships. We are so distant yet so close and the bond we created between all the chaos and commotion became something so significant. We had such a difficult time leaving each other.

We thought we'd be together forever, planning things we thought would come to life. The time we spent planning names and dates and we never thought would dissolve with the disattachment I decided to accept. Now, here we are. In a place so far from each other. A place that came with so much hurt that turned into hatred and more chaos.

I miss you and I know you miss me.

The things you have taught me and the things I have taught you turned into memories we never want to relive. The trauma we went through and put each other through, became something so disastrous that we think that it'll be easy to drown away with alcohol and drugs yet still lives lively in our hearts and minds.

But as toxic as we were. I'd relive it all over again.... if it meant having you.

I miss you....

[elytrafemme]

sorry to rant and also dont publish this if you dont want to but this whole situation is ridiculous im SICK of people saying it wasnt grooming because it wasnt the Perfect Example TM of grooming and the girl didnt have the evidence because it was on snapchat. its been four years(?) and i am still so reluctant to talk about what happened to me and admit that what went down was grooming and it makes me feel so bad because holy shit can people not be the tiniest bit sympathetic she came FORWARD do you not REALISE how terrifying that is how terrifying it is to realise that its grooming???? and people hardly believe some victims anyway because "how didnt you realise" and that bullshit and its even WORSE for her because its dream and his fanbase is fucking RABID. i think dream has made my fear of getting doxxed AT LEAST LIKE forty percent worse. sorry again i dont know if this is understandable 👍

hope you are okay with me posting this but yeah this situation fucks me up so badly because, like with any situation in which grooming allegations are presented to the public, people severely misunderstand the psychological anguish that comes FROM being groomed.

and like, okay, not to get personal because i do still try to avoid talking about this, but i was groomed a few years ago. sexual things were part of that experience, like the current allegations with Dream right now, and i still struggle very heavily with it.

seeing people be so dismissive of it, thinking that the sexual trauma from it isn't "enough" or whatever invalidating shit they're saying, or accusing them of not coming forward fast enough -- that is incredibly victim-blaming and also hurts victims of the situation. over the past three years, i have gone from hating anyone who spoke badly about my abuser, to experiencing heavy emotional distress and derealization because of what happened, to blaming myself. i am STILL blaming myself for what happened and it's been three years. three MONTHs after the situation i was still partly dismissive of the people who pulled me out of that situation. and being groomed had not only been an internally destructive thing, but it caused me to lose touch with friend groups of mine, get into an unhealthy relationship, and a myriad of other issues.

and this was me with someone i knew only online, and someone who was generally disliked by others. holy shit i cannot express how fucking horrifying it is that this is happening with a CONTENT CREATOR, and a "beloved" one at that. my own experience had been awful but i never directly feared for my own safety; when you pull in people with large fanbases and significant power over you in the eyes of the populace but also financially and in ways socially as well, that makes things so much fucking worse.

you cannot expect someone who has been groomed to immediately report the incident. reporting that something bad happened to you is a Sisyphean task, and even RECOGNIZING you were groomed is SO much fucking harder than people think it to be. I was still telling my therapist that my abuser was the only one of my friends i consistently could rely on even whilst signs of my abuse were worsening. i was having tangible dreams about meeting this person for MONTHS. losing them felt like cutting a limb off even though they had spent the past half of a year abusing me.

the way that people treat grooming victims is indicative of a larger problem with the internet which is this disattachment from people to other people. we struggle to sympathize with the struggles of others because we feel like they're not people and rather just props. even if not consciously we see it as if other people are just players in this game and we have the authority to be critical over it.

you could be the most honest, fearless, brave, and intelligent person in the world, and you would still struggle to open up about being groomed. because none of those characteristics, or any characteristics at ALL, change the fact that going through that kind of trauma is severely fucking damaging and is incredibly scary to talk about. ESPECIALLY with the dialogue around victims nowadays.

#nightmare.ask #okay to reblog #grooming tw

[voidcat]

Kaeya + lucky number 11 + vampires

requested by Aqua<3, for 666 event

For what feels like hours, you reach for another door knob, only for it to disattach and remain in your hand.

Great, just the perfect continuation for this perfect night.

With a turn, you make way back to the grand hallway to try your luck with a new door, only for your foot to meet with something soft and gooey.

Frozen in place, with your other leg staying still in the air, you slowly turn your gaze down, eyes open bright– all you can do, besides your breath hitching, is to let out a shriek.

“Wh- what the fuck is this? Bat shit?! Once I find a way out, they’re dead!” You whisper-yell the last bit as you drag you foot against the carpet in an attempt to clean it.

The moon covered by clouds only make it worse, drowning the entire mansion in absolute silence.

Agreeing to a stupid outing, fine. Then drinks get involved, followed by awfully uncreative games and next thing you remember, being dragged into the infamous mansion.

You don’t recall for how long you’ve been walking around in circles, muttering all kinds of curses and threats under your breath.

A silky voice reaches your ears: “You alright there?”

With a groan, you roll your eyes. “Ugh- it’s this stupid night. I’ve been hungry and thirsty for hours now, have no idea where my friends are, my phone is dead, I stepped on shit and with this stupid luck, I bet that dumb vampire myth will turn out to be legit and I’ll walk right into its hands.”

You say all of that within a single breath, to desperate to get it all out. Taking a deep breath and out, you divert your gaze back down and see the source of the voice.

Hair looking softer than his voice, half of his face seems to be taken in by the shadows, only for you to move your feet slightly and notice he wears an eyepatch actually.

Then your gaze shoots up, to a particular portrait above him, then back to his face, fuck.

The man chuckles, it sounds heavenly, as much as bells of danger ring loudly in your head.

“Are you always this prone to bad luck and violence? If so, that’s kind of sad.”

He says with a tiny pout that you know to be fake, arms crossed before him. If it weren’t for the cute pout, he would look to be straight out of the portrait, though he looks even more handsome in person.

Maybe you just have a knack for manifesting unfortunate things.

“I am never saying a word ever again. Never.”

This only makes him laugh, a hand going up to cover his mouth, barely. Canine teeth stand out among the rest, longer than the average.

When you take a step back, he seems to be drawn out of his laughter, giving you a look over.

Before you can act or do anything else, you hear a gust of wind, the space before you now empty, feeling a breath over your neck.

A chill runs down your spine at the close proximity, too close, sharp fangs right above your neck, one centimeter forward and you’ll be nothing but dust.

Well, at least you’ll go out in a hot way, or so you hope.

“Say…” he drags the word on his tongue as you catch a glance of him by your side, “how about we help each other out?” you don’t realize you’ve backed away from him until he is in your view in all his glory.

A gloved hand reaches out to you, “Kaeya Alberich, a pleasure to meet you. Allow me to join you for the remainder of the night.”

It’s the cold grip on your hand that snaps you out of your head, realizing a firm shake too late that you’ve taken the hand reached out.

#666 event #kaeya alberich #genshin impact #kaeya x reader #kaeya x you #genshin drabble #genshin x you

[sunny6677]

Eddie Eddie Literature Club!

(Act 1, Chapter 2)

(TW: THIS IS A DDLC X EDDSWORLD CROSSOVER. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, IF DDLC TRIGGERS YOU, THEN DONT READ THIS. AND TAKE THIS WARNING SERIOUSLY.)

(BTW the player is you, just so ya know)

And slight tw for this chapter: heavy amounts of pain and slight dark humor towards the end

--------------------------‐----------------

Matt pulled me down the street, as I yelped helplessly behind him. I was truly hopeless with this stupid, child-like man dragging me around. The only reason I agreed to this was for the food and booze.. yet it came with the price of pain.

I panted and tried to tell Matt to stop, but it only came out in pained gibberish as he moved faster, it was almost scary. How could a human man move at such speed?

-

The running came to a close fortunately when we had came across a house. Matt proudly smiled and put a hand on his hip as he pulled my arm closer. "Ah, here it is!"

I coughed roughly; "How on-- earth are-- you so-- fast?!.." I tried to say, but it only came out in broken coughs of misery. Matt looked down at me, "Hmm.. maybe it was that blue quill I ate earlier?"

"Wha- what?" I raised a brow, confused, but still coughed toughly anyway. Matt shrugged, "Oh, nothing-- now, c'mon!"

Like a flash of light, he grabbed my arm tighter and dragged me towards the door of the house, and knocked on the dark brown door. He smiled patiently as I coughed more and more. Seriously, how was he so fast?!

The door then creaked open, and out peeked a man.

It was a man. He had dark brown hair, and eyes that looked like emeralds with how green they were, they were like a jungle full of life. He had a green hoodie on, and slightly grayish brown pants. In his hand, he held a singular, cold Cola.

"Oh, Matt! There you are! It's about club time, where've you been?" He asked, a cute English accent tinted to his voice. Matt grinned, "I brought a new member!"

He let go of me, and sent my torso slumping down, leaning towards the floor as I gasped for air.

"Oh, perfect! Bring them in." The man smiled, not acknowledging my suffering whatsoever. "Okay!" Matt then pulled me in, and I immediately knew i was in a different place. For some reason, the aura of the place felt different. Cold, yet still.. strange, in a way.

My hands fell to my knees as I coughed again and again, I heard footsteps coming in the room, but my body kept coughing anyway. A masculine, norweigan voice then spoke; "Jeez, Matt, what did you do to them?"

"Eh, dragged them around to the point where they have a coughing fit, the usual!" Matt answered proudly, placing both hands on his hips.

I looked up, and the man whom I presume was the norweigan one came up to me.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Y/N. Matt's been speaking about you for quite a while now."

His hair was spiked, and it was a light brown color. He had a visibly missing tooth, though for some reason it was oddly cute. He had a comfortable looking red hoodie, and black pants. His skin was oddly pale for some reason, and there was a bandage on the right side of his cheek.

He held out his hand, and I weakly placed it in his to shake it. An electric shock then raced through my body, as I fell to the floor and coughed again out of surprise.

"Hahah! Oh, that was priceless!" He cackled sadistically, looking down at me with a amused grin.

He disattached something from his hand, and a strange object I had never seen before in my life fell onto the floor.

He kneeled down and held out his hand again, "Oh, sorry-- couldn't resist, one of my inventions."

I held out my hand, and shook it while shivering. Nothing went through my body this time, but it was still terrifying.

He pulled me up to the floor, and another man came in. But it was a visibly different man compared to the others.

He had black eyes, that were like a cave of mystery and shadows. His skin was pale, and he had pineapple-resembling light brown hair. He had a dark blue hoodie and black pants.

"Oh, great. You brought another one." His voice was deeper compared to everyone else, but was English too. Matt smiled happily, and held me close; "Yep! And they're the member I was talking about!"

"Do they have Smirnoff?" Asked the man. "N.. Nnnnnooo?.." Said Matt, seemingly confused by his question but still smiling. The man stood silently for a moment, but went back into the room he came out of.

...

All words escape me in this situation. This club.. while incredibly threatening in an odd way.. was full of incredibly handsome boys!

"Helloo??? Earth to Y/N?"

I snapped out of my glazed thoughts as Matt waved a hand in front of my face, "A-Ah, sorry-- spaced out." I apologized immediately.

He grinned, "Eh, no worries-- now, let me go make you meet everyone because I want you to see my novelty toy collection!"

He dragged me again, but not fast enough to the point of coughing again, just feeling dizzy.

I placed a hand on my head as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder area. He then held out an arm as he began to point to all of them one by one.

"So this is Tord, the nicest one in the club!" Matt pointed at the norweigan guy, who was poking at the guy with no eyes cheek while smirking maliciously.

He noticed this comment, and smiled while making a peace sign. The man with no eyes then punched him.

"And thats Tom, you can just ignore him when he gets moody.." He whispered that last part really loudly as he pointed to the guy with no eyes, 'Tom' only looked more annoyed when he made that comment. "

Wow, i feel so loved.." He sarcastically said.

Matt then finally pointed to the guy with the green hoodie. "And thats Edd, President of the club! He's probably the most artistic here~" He smiles.

Edd only sips on his Cola, but smiles at me anyway.

"And of course, there's me! The vice president! And the most handsome here~" He smugly said, making a finger gun. I only rolled my eyes at that, but smiled.

"O- Okay, but-" I was then cut off by Tom suddenly pulling out a bottle of alcohol. He threw it to me.

"If booze was what you were looking for, then there." He said blankly, showing no emotion.

I stood, surprised, how did he know I was going to ask that so quickly?

I held it in my hand, and looked around for a place to sit. The couch seemed like the only option, since the only two other people sitting on it were Tord and Tom.

Tord practically had Tom cornered against the couch as he teased him about something I couldn't understand.

I sat on the edge of the couch, and twisted the lid off the alcohol. I felt a gaze on me for a moment, and then another moment more.

Then suddenly, a bag of chips flung towards me, and a volume of what appeared to be manga.

I looked. And saw that Tord had been the one who threw it my way. "You looked depressed, so there." He said. That was.. an odd thing to say, but I replied anyway; "Um, okay.."

It then went silent for a moment, as I found myself clinging to my thoughts again. Matt sat beside me and wrapped an arm around me once more; he said something, but I payed no attention.

What had I gotten myself into?

Were handsome men really worth pain?

...

Of course they were! I'd let myself get stabbed for cute men!

////////////////////

Just so you know, these are specifically the legacy versions. I don't like the beyond versions since I don't like beyond or Matt hargreaves(he's ableist, friends with very problematic people and so on) so yeah-

#eddsworld #edd #matt #tord #tom #ddlc

[eternally--mortal]

Stranger Things Spoilers!!!

(Thoughs on the end of season 4 and predictions for season 5 beneath the break)

I just want to put out there that the doc and One both said that One absorbs his victims. Which means that Max is still alive; she’s just Trapped With Him.

El saved her body. Now all they have to do is put her consciousness back where it belongs.

Which also means there‘s an impending mindscape reunion between El and her other ‘siblings’. And if this is all a hive mind, it means that Everyone who has died Throughout All the Seasons is potentially stuck in there and might make a reappearance in One’s mind. After all, even when he and/or the demigorgon was turning people into meat piles, their consciences were still potentially there — just enslaved and disattached. The big fear, at least from my end, wasn’t necessarily that they couldn’t be saved. It was that he eliminated the chance for their bodies to be saved as well (I watched most of season three with the mantra ‘Don’t Dissolve Billy’ and we all see where that got me).

Max and Billy? Stuck in there together. Eddie might be stuck in there, too. It’s going to be a fight from both sides.

(Also, if Jason’s there he’s going to realize how he Screwed all of them by interrupting their plan and how he’s been a total idiot about Eddie. Plus Chrissy will be there to defend Eddie. Which is great. She seemed nice.)

(And, honestly, if Vecna can absorb people I don’t see why El can’t steal them. I’m not sure what’s going to happen to all of those consciousnesses, but they don’t have to necessarily dissolve.)

#Stranger things #stranger things spoilers #stranger things season 4 #stranger things season 5 #max mayfield #Eleven #eleven stranger things #jane hopper #vecna stranger things #vecna/henry/one #one stranger things #I won’t say too much more #because spoilers

[leffee]

More thoughts on vinnie?

So I've been thinkinh, thoughts, huh? Thoughts aren't necessarily headcanons, so I came to a conlusion that I will give you some thoughts on things that actually happened in episodes i.e. things that are canon and I didn't come up with them based on my projections and basically throwing anything at him. So here, a few thoughts that can sometimes get a bit headcanon-y but are based on actual episodes:

so I said this one time in one previous post that when lizards lose their tails they lose all the energy stored in there. BUt wait, there's more! I have also learned very recently that apparently sometimes lizards will eat that disattached tail in order to get back that energy. So yeah, just imagine fucking Vinnie eating his tail after losing it, "What? It's tasty and energizing. It's like coffee for lizards," said Vinnie, chewing on his own tail, while the rest of the pets and Blythe stared wide-eyed,

remember in this one winter episode when at the very end Blythe took all the pets outside, skating and stuff? Let me rephrase that. She took a cold-blooded lizard outside, in winter, the day wasn't even a warmer one, there was clearly snow, not even melting. So yeah, I have a sort of headcanon that like 2 seconds after we saw the episode end Blythe realized that and rushed everyone back to the pet shop because "Omg, Vinnie's gonna fucking die". I'm sorry lol,

and speaking of all that, I have a thought that we only ever saw 2 winter episodes in lps because Vinnie couldn't be there during the rest of the winter and it would be boring without him sksks. Now, some sources say that lizards hibernate, but I also saw some time ago on some site that they do a similiar thing called I don't remember what and I can't find it now, but basically it means a much, much lower level of activity, but not sleeping 24/7. Basically what I'm trying to say is that we only ever got 2 winter episodes because Vinnie was asleep or very inactive during the winter and it would be boring without him sksksksksks,

so this one is actually very important to me. In this one episode in which Blythe brought an egg for the pets to care for for a while, the pets were deciding who should keep it warm. And a very, very interesting scene occured that I am almost convinced was not a coincidence. So when Minka went to sit on this egg and kept moving Vinnie just fuccing came out of nowhere and with quite a hint of irritation told her that she's doing it wrong and it will never get warm this way. And yeah, he would know that, he would see it as an almost offence perhaps. He is a reptile, he got born from an egg, he knows a thing or two about those stuff. Sure, that was a bird's egg in this episode, but think about it, you're a reptile, you see an egg and are said to take care of it. He probably had some sort of thought that the rest of the pets are mammals, they don't know anything about eggs! But he does. Even Russell's expression in that scene seems to adress that. Because as soon as Vinnie shows up and says that Russell has this thoughtful expression like he came to the same conclusion as me... Am I overthinking this?

his anger at Esteban was so cool. He was genuinely pissed that he lied to his friends, which just shows how much he cares about them honestly. But I also find it interesting how the episode didn't have a "perfect" ending, because he didn't end up telling them that he lied, no, because Esteban saved his friends. And that's more important to him at the end of the day. But enough of that mushy stuff, and since he did announce very loud and clear to the rest of the pets that he had something to say but didn't do it in the end I can imagine at some point after the episode, be it days or even weeks one of them is completely casually like "Oh yeah, Vinnie, what did you want to tell us this one time when Esteban was here?" and Vinnie just stands there like "Uhhhh."

also there's this one thing that I find absolutely hilarious. You know that episode with Mew Mew and when he got stuck in that dumbwaiter shaft? So yeah, they utilized Minka's ability to climb and let's say they gave a tangible answer to why she couldn't bring him back down. And the pets were trying all those crazy solutions and ideas but the whole time I was just... Vinnie could have literally did the same thing as Minka, plus he doesn't have claustrophobia AND he literally sticks to walls, it would have been even easier for him xD. Now, canonically I suppose it makes sense that he himself would not think of this, but really, nobody else? A mistake on the writing team? A plot convenience? Probably, but I like to think that similiarly to the two other episodes I did that to, once the situation was settled the pets realized that, or maybe even Blythe was like "So uh, why didn't you just send Vinnie to fetch him?" and they all realize that they literally forgot something like that and face palm. Episode end

Huh, I didn't realize I had so many thoughts based on episodes... ;-;. I have more but I guess I'll finish here. I love him, he's so cool

#I'm also delusional #next time: Vinnil headcanons #probably #lps 2012 #asks #vinnie terrio