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broomsticks · 1 year

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finally getting to this (TY to @billsfangearring for the rec) and thinking that the entire thing should be mandatory listening for anyone and everyone who wants to participate in fandom. I learned so much about fannish history, zines, fandom on the internet, the creation of FFN — also hell yeah to whoever of the podcasters is a snarry/ tomarry shipper — but mostly seconding this very hard

maybe i’m especially in my fandom history feels thanks to femslash february & @lumosatnight’s HP femslash history thing, but — this basically yall, i’m so emotional. (timestamp approx. 2h15m in).

fanlore article: An Archive Of One's Own (post by astolat), a proposal that astolat posted to her LiveJournal in May 2007.

First, why fanfic is not illegal and why YOU should stop saying that it is even if you don't agree, by cesperanza. Please read it. That said, the people behind fanlib (talked about many places, see astridv here) don't actually care about fanfic, the fanfic community, or anything except making money off content created entirely by other people and getting media attention. They don't have a single fanfic reader or writer on their board; they don't even have a single woman on their board. They're creating a lawsuit-bait site while being bad potential defendants, and they deserve to be chased out being pelted with rocks. But even if they were, which I doubt is going to happen, because hey, they have people and money, we're still left with this problem: we are sitting quietly by the fireside, creating piles and piles of content around us, and other people are going to look at that and see an opportunity. And they are going to end up creating the front doors that new fanfic writers walk through, unless we stand up and build our OWN front door.

every time i think i cannot love ao3 more i find even more to love and respect about it & everyone who contributed to creating it. what an empowering story this is, you all, about taking OWNERSHIP and mobilizing the community and building the places, MAKING the spaces you want to have. being the change you want to see.

and this list of desired features —

- allowing ANYTHING -- het, slash, RPF, chan, kink, highly adult - giving explicit credit to the original creators while clearly disclaiming any official status - making it easy for people to download stories - options for people to post [recursively transformative works inspired by] the original story, all of which would automatically be linked back so you could see the kind of interconnecting 'web' of how our work is interrelated - automatic rec lists (just click on a story to add it to your rec list) - mentoring: collect up writing advice, fannish history, acafandom, and create a simple FAQ (integrate a wiki?)

!!! these values!! HISTORY and COMMUNITY fucking HISTORY and COMMUNITY.

what we’re doing is LEGITIMATE, it has VALUE and it is REAL.

it is alright if not everyone cares about everything or indeed the same things, it is alright if no two people see things the same way or perfectly align in fandom interests and preferences and headcanons, but there is so much to celebrate and uplift about each other. we have so much in common. so much.

also happiness has meaning and catharsis has meaning and exploration has meaning, art has meaning and creativity and individual expression is meaningful, for the creator if no one else , and is worthy of celebration and love if only because life and living is fucking hard, yall.

ahhh i am so sad and angry (that this was our fandom history! that it was such a struggle! that even now there is so much infighting! that some things i love are not as popular and widely loved compared to other things (that i also love!)) — but i’m also so touched and SO grateful that this is our fandom history because wow is it one of triumph and empowerment and community collaboration. it was dreamt and then proposed and then built, from scratch, and we’re adding to it every day.

and then the timeline stuff (the post was made may 17th, 2007! the domain names were registered may 30th! the first donations came in september 2007 and the site was operational as we know it in 2009!) holy shit!

ahhh i love fandom and all this gift economy and joy.

p.s. there’s also a part 2 with olderthannetfic(’s fandom backstory lmao). which i’ve only just started listening to so expect a similarly in my feels post about that in uhhhhhhh two months

#fandom history #ao3 #talkinfanfic #fanficmaverick #fandom meta #fandom podcast #fandom love

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scurvgirl · 7 months

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Weekly Tag Wednesday! (is that the order? I can never remember)

Ah! I missed the last few, I'm so sorry! Thank you to all who have tagged before and this time <3 @mybrainismelted @energievie @michellemisfit

Hello Wednesday friends! I hope you don't mind but I decided to be CrEaTiVe and try something different today. I hope it's okay!! 🚑💨 Get in bitch, we're going on a mystical adventure through space, time, and reality. (in ian and mickey's ambulance of course) ✨ Name: Scurv (y'all, I am so tired, I almost wrote my government name)

Zodiac Sign: Taurus

Personality type in enneagram, myers-briggs, or both: I think my Meyers-Briggs' is INFP but not to get all psych degree but it's actually hella unreliable and not accurate and -

Before we hit the road, what snack are you gonna bring for our trip? Peanut M&M's and Jalapeno Chips

Navigator gets to pick the music so what song are you turning on? Telephone by Lady Gaga ft. Beyonce

What is a universe from a fantasy tv show you would like to visit? Avatar: The Last Airbender! I wanna be a bender (a water bender!)

And what about a fantasy movie? Howl's Moving Castle. I almost said LOTR but to actually be in...I think the magic aspects of Howl's Moving Castle fits my vibe better overall

Okay, how about a scifi tv show? Oh man, I don't watch many scifi TV shows, hmm....I really don't know, maybe Star Trek but I never really watched it!

And a scifi movie universe? I guess Star Wars, I think it'd be cool to see Coruscant

Any other tv show or movie universes you'd like to swing by before we move on? Fuck it, let's go to the Shire and get blazed

Okay hold on to your butts we're switching gears to fanfic universes. Tell me which fanfic universe we're visiting first? Like by an author? I don't really follow anyone religiously in the Shameless fandom and I skew towards more realistic AU's if that makes sense? Now if we are talking about ALL of my fandoms, I am sending myself to the LG Frat AU I made YEARS ago with friends in the Dragon Age fandom that to this day remains one of the coolest fan things I've ever contributed to.

Cool, do you have one more you'd like to stop at before we head home? Can I choose one I made? Because I'd also like to visit my House Witch AU I made for Dragon Age OC's. Still proud of that as well. (to my Shameless folks, I originate in the DA fandom here, so most of my catalogue is gonna be from there)

Alright, on our way out of fanfic land you get to snag some tropes to bring home and apply to your own life, think fast! soulmates or enemies to lovers // coffee shop or flower shop // fake relationship or slow burn // amnesia or time loop (neither lol) // body swap or miscommunication // love triangle or arranged marriage // sharing a bed or drunken confession (BOTH)

Wow okay, hope those tropes work out for you!! Our adventure has finally come to an end, where in the world am I dropping you off? Georgia, USA

tagging @lupeloto @golden28s @jademickian um...I am so sorry you guys, I am so tired I can't think of anymore off the top of my head - if you see this, I tagged you!!! <3

#thank you for the tag #scurv actually answers

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tiger-in-the-flightdeck · 2 months

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D, I and O

D: What was the first thing you ever contributed to a fandom?AhahahHAHAHAHA!!! Oh man, it was this. Something that I'm 100% sure is older than a lot of my followers. I can't even confirm exactly how old it is, because the website that I originally posted it on doesn't exist anymore.

I: Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so, which and why? So, once upon a time, in the days of yore, while I was still a total novice at this whole Fandom thing, I picked up a DVD from the library. What's this?? I thought. Someone made a modern version of my favourite literary characters??? Wow, I wonder if anyone else thinks these two guys are in love. I should check online! And in my naivete, I did. And for a while, it was great! Sure, I created my blog in the midst of the 'You shouldn't bite someone's dick without permission' discourse, and sure I was accused of appropriating my own culture because I didn't agree with the sentiment that an AU about the characters as cavemen(I think? Fuck it's been forever) was being maliciously racist, and sure I received dozens of death threats when I cited examples that suggested one of the characters was recovering from an ED, and SURE I eventually stopped writing for years after being repeatedly harassed and misgendered and threatened by readers when I asked them to stop speaking to me offensively. And SU- Sorry. Where was I going with this? Oh right! Eventually, the thing that put me off entirely was when a fandom divide cropped up and they started fighting over whether or not there was a Conspiracy involved with the writers/directors/media/actors/actors' wives/the fucking queen, i don't know. I figured it was just silly fun, and said I didn't buy into said Conspiracy. Hoo, boy. The flood of hate was epic. So when 'that side' started chirping on about how they were so sweet and kind and generous compared to their Enemies, I said 'Uh, and what about this message I got? And this one? And this other? And these thirty more?' which got a response of 'Oh, those are obviously from people on your side sending you those messages pretending to be True Believers, to make us look bad. Or you probably sent them to yourself.' At which point, I blocked about a hundred people, added a crap ton of stuff to my blacklist, disabled anon, and noped the fuck outta there. Kept the beloved friends I made, though!

O: Choose a song at random, what ship does it remind you of? This one reminds me of TimKon. Specifically 100 Failed Cloning Attempts TimKon.

youtube

And this one isn't exactly random(and warning for lots of flashing lights), but it gives me of Constantine/First of the Fallen vibes.

youtube

Specifically from the First's point of view...

With young, scruffy punk John.

Which I definitely haven't written.... *CoughDevil'sMusicCough*

#replies #timkon #adam lambert #the accursed fandom which shall not be named #john constantine #first of the fallen

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fleur1005 · 1 year

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YiZhan Fandom Interview with Renren !!

Preface:

In my attempt to sort out all the massive information that is generated almost daily in the BJYX fandom, I came up with an idea to interview prominent 🐢 for pointers, recommendations and advice as kind of a starter compilation kit for newbies.

Also, my intent is to provide some translations of the interviews (if you’re also interested in translating, let me know thru’ my twt acc below) for international fans and contribute my grain of salt to thin the language barriers and get to know more fans or simply, know your fave person in fandom.

With that being said, this is my first interview, so any constructive FB is welcome!

-::-::-::-

Thanks so very much for accepting my first ever interview, Renren 🙏

So, the first question is kind of a mandatory introduction.

Q. Please, tell us a bit about yourself. How you like to be called or how do you go by in this fandom and how long you’ve been in the swamp?

I’m Renren, but most folks call me Ren. I’m a fic writer and a szd shipper (which for new folks means I believe they’re actually in a relationship, this is also called being a tinhat lol).

I watched The Untamed in January 2021, and then watched the official BTS, and saw a shipper in the comments and was like “huh, people ship real people?” I was no stranger to shipping fictional characters (I’ve written Reylo before), but RPS was brand new to me. But the more I watched of the BTS and then the unofficial BTS, I was like, oh yeah, there’s something here. The cave BTS sealed it for me.

So, I’ve been in the pit since January/February 2021. I lurked for a long time, then joined fandom more actively in the fall of 2021, and started writing and released my first Yizhan fic in Jan 2022.

This is your first RPS? Wow, how cool is that? To debut with such a power couple! ☺️

Q. When you were a lurker, which SNS did you mostly use?

Which leads to the next question…

Q. Where are you most active/ favorite place to dabble in fandom-wise?

I lurked on tumblr mostly, and read Twitter without an account. I didn’t make one until August, and I don’t think I used it to post until September/October 2021.

I’m active most on Twitter, with Tumblr set up as my backup to Twitter.(@renren85105)

I’m also on AO3 as TheDevilandMrsRen.

Tumblr

By the way, you have very distinct profile pic (wyb with an octopus plushie on his head!). Did you always use it?? Is there a reason why you chose that? 🤭

I think I had a different one when I signed up, but I can’t remember it - I chose it because I like tentacles lol

As in a fic trope/kink? or something else? 😆

Both lol, I’ve always loved octopuses, I think they’re darling, but I also enjoy tentacles as a trope.

We’ll come to that later~~! There’s a question regarding that afterwards.

Q. What was your first drive/motivation to start writing about them? Would you share a link to your first fic?

It was Xiao Zhan’s lightsaber video!!! I had this idea for a Star Wars AU with the two of them, and it took me over body and soul and I finally had to write it. The first story I posted though was the first Golden Girls AU,

then the Star Wars AU came out a month later.

By the way, you guys have to go read Renren’s Golden Girls AU cos I can assure you, you are going to enjoy it SO much, if you haven’t already!!

So on to the next one!

Q. How many fics have you written so far? Which one is the one that you’re most fond of and why?

I’ve written 15 Yizhan fics so far, and drawn 10 mushroom fanarts! I’m not sure I can pick a favorite, but it’s between “Fireworks in the Stars” because it’s an original concept that I’ve been playing with for years and want to eventually write a full original novel with it, and “Houseboat of Love”, because I had so much fun with the exes-to-lovers concept. It was a bit angsty but I also wanted it to be a fun time with Xiao Zhan thirsting hard for his not-actually-ex-husband.

But I love everything I’ve published, if I don’t love it, I don’t release it.

I had totally missed that Renren’s mushroom posts are fanarts! I had to rush to see them and they are all SOSOSO Adorable, with capital A! The puns are sublime. I loved them all to bits and she has confirmed there’s more to come in the future!! Be on the look out, you guys!! 🥹🥹

Q. What’s your favorite trope to write/draw or a new one that want to try this year?

Oh, that’s hard! Because it’s different from my favorite tropes to read.

I really like to write getting together stories, especially if there is only one bed/they’re stuck together in some way.

But this is the year I’ll finally write tentacles, which is actually so much harder than I thought because a) I want to do it justice since I love it so much and b) there is SO MUCH choreography involved with all the extra limbs. You Belong in My Arms is my tentacle WIP, with chapter one out. Chapter one just has a cute octopus and tentacle kink, but no actual use of tentacles in a sexy way.

I will just restrain myself to say that Renren’s octopus is so cute like an underwater jianguo. I am hopelessly hooked to her fic that am anxiously looking forward to new chapters! But I digress…

Q. Are you bjyx, zsww or lsfy? Is this dynamic important to you when writing? (Or reading?)

So I am a bjyx-leaning lsfy. I enjoy reading everything, but I prefer writing bjyx or Yibo top lsfy.

That sounds like it’s the same thing, but the power dynamics are different between them (bjyx Yibo is IN CHARGE while it’s much more neutral in lsfy).

You mean like, Yibo makes the move? Or that he decides how he wants XZ?

Yeah, in BJYX makes most of the decisions, he’s very dominant in the bedroom and outside of it.

I like strong Yibo, indeed 😏

Q. What’s your most fave 🍬? Have you written about it? Where do you get most of your 🍬 sources?

My most favorite candy is the tattoo cpn! I have used it, most literally in an unreleased work, but I love to give both of them tattoos in my works anytime I can.

My candy sources are from Twitter (overthinkingthis, ecah, shirasagis, ventus for older candies) and tumblr (accio-victuuri), and I avoid folks sharing stalker footage or making wild claims like they know someone in the business or disparage their co-stars, because it’s harmful to the boys & just flat out rude.

I think for us newbies, we need to be careful and prudent on that and not fall for everything we see or outright edited (fake) info, cos it’s becoming harder to distinguish 😵‍ (out of my own experience)

So, the next question is selective, you can choose either or both…

A) Did you read THE fic? The controversial 22/7 one? How did you like it? How would you end it?

AND/OR

B) Do you wanna talk about wyb’s latest NYG’s LtS performance?

A) I didn’t. I didn’t even go looking for it, it has so many emotions and events attached to it, I think it’s best to just let it rest. No judgment for folks who decide to read it, though! Just my opinion.

B) Yes I do!! it was gorgeous and emotional, all about the yearning and longing you feel when you’re away from your partner and the bright warmth you feel when you’re back with them. It felt real, like he was pulling it from the depths of his soul.

It’s raw and vulnerable, and he did such a good job, I’m so proud of him! (And no, I don’t think it’s a breakup song or born from anything other than long distance relationships being hard.)

That performance was so heartfelt indeed 🥲

Q. Who is a content creator (writer, artist, v/blogger… etc) you would rec to a newbie? (Name as many as you wish) And lastly, a piece of advice for newbie 🐢!

Oh gosh, so many people! It’s hard to not just list all of my friends lol.

OldObsess/Overthinkingthis is a fantastic writer and candy librarian, her fics have great footnotes with all the different things she references in her fics.

Elisamiao is another amazing writer and she is so supportive of new writers in the fandom. I call her the fandom’s librarian because she is fantastic at fic recommendations, and can find what you’re looking for so fast!

Jalpari runs great events, and is a prolific writer, her Yizhan Through the Years is the first/second most kudos’d fic in the fandom. She is also very supportive of new authors/artists in the fandom!

BJYXObsessed is hilarious, her fics are so good and her meme threads are laugh out loud funny, I see them all over the place as reaction memes.

Bjyxnoa is a great update account on Twitter, and for deep cpn and candy discussions I like to go to Accio-victuuri on tumblr.

A piece of advice I have for new turtles is to not worry too much about proof of their relationship. They don’t have to prove anything to us, and each person has to decide for themselves how to interpret the things they do tell us. Everyone has their own “realness” comfort level, and that’s okay! It’s okay to be 100% szd and it’s okay to not be!

Lastly, their privacy is extremely important. Stalker footage is wrong, even if it “proves” what you want to see.

And don’t break the fourth wall with them, for example, if Yibo makes another Instagram post, don’t flood the comments with shipper comments, their social accounts are for work, and so we should keep our comments to the individual and the work they’re doing.

END

-::-::-::-

I can’t thank Renren enough for accepting my offer and come on board with this wee project of mine, and especially her wise words of advice 🙏🙏🙏

It’s a great reminder to all of us 🐢 that we ought to keep in mind and keep our recklessness in check. If we really love and support them, we must first respect their individual works.

And that’s it for today, folks! Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it.

You can find me on twt @fleur_1005 for suggestions and/or comments!

#bjyxszd #yizhan #wang yibo #xiao zhan #bjyx #interviews #fandom inspired

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bride-of-dracaenca · 2 years

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A Brief, Totally Incoherent History of the OG Animaniacs Fandom (1993 - ???), Part 0.001

(Early - Mid 1990s Animaniacs/PatB Fandom History that Exactly Nobody Cares About!)

@@@hhh…wow. Oh hey, tumblr!

So! OG Animaniacs Fandom seems to be a mostly forgotten chapter in Internet fandom history. Arguably, it was one of the very first Internet/Online fandoms with a unique, discernable “culture.” These fan cultures had existed before – but Animaniacs, arguably one of the first “Megafandoms” - that is to say, one of the first with its genesis (as opposed to merely its continuation) on the Internet - just happened to premiere during September, 1993. Also known on the early Internet as the ETERNAL SEPTEMBER (no, I am not making this up! See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eternal_September).

Therefore, it had stuff like this:

A! JW21 YK++i WK++ DT+++!^ P&B+ S&S+ HIP--- S!D--- P+++ Dpfdd{s} Tow2 $++++dmvac Vr+++++j+++t+++m++{s} IV! T419/65Years E5/73 H53 PonYiddish XBRomp A35 M

(That’s not my A! Geek Code, it’s the A! Code of a guy who is really, really cool and smart and was created by a guy who’s really, really cool and smart, FYI.)

Meh, I keep putting this off. Is it because of the collapse of our ecosystem and civilization in this horrible, dystopian “future” that we all find ourselves collectively in? Is it because the very idea of being one of the youngest contributing members of a fandom and, three decades later, maaaaybe, being one of the very oldest, again just maybe (I dunno) is like…one of the saddest things I can even imagine right now? Well, except for the collapse of our ecosystem, civilization, etc. etc.? Gee, okay. That part’s much worse.

I want to go back and eat Dunkaroos and watch Fox Kids. Take me back NOW. Please? ALSO I HATE THE RICH TEXT EDITOR I HATE BEING CAGED I WANT TO BE FREE AND MARKUP AND CODE AS I PLEASE WITH NO LOGIC OR REASON IN ANGELFIRE AND GEOCITIES AND TO FTP TO MY HEART’S CONTENT WITH DANCING CAT .GIFS AND MIDI FILES AND BLUE LINKS ON GREY BACKGROUNDS THAT TURN PURPLE WHEN YOU CLICK THEM AT THE VERY DAWN OF THE WWW 235273^$*&%$!23532 CURSE YOU!

@@@H. Aaanyway. I’ll just come out and say it: I was in the original Animaniacs (A!)/Pinky and the Brain (PatB) fandom starting in…in some form, at least as a lurker, September 1993, when the show first started airing on our local affiliate Fox Kids before it jumped the shark by jumping to the Kids’ WB.

Oh, haha, I kid about that last part. Please just read everything here as kidding/sarcastic, because it is. What is it that you kids do these days? Tone indicators? Read all of this as /j /lh /s or whatevertheheck. You know what I mean. Anyway, possibly earlier, because a.t.a (alt.tv.animaniacs on usenet) was preceded by alt.tv.tiny-toon. And I was a cagey, anxious, fringe-s kid who was really way, way, way too young to be there.

Oh, yes! “Kids” in early Internet fandom! Funny story about that.

So I had started posting some of the first fan works/meta, or whatever the heck it’s called now, for this A!/PatB...stuff, online, by 1994, and…just give me a sec here to chug some, um, “grape juice.” Boy am I super proud of this and this short series of “fandom history” I am about to share throughout this summer, and not ashamed at all. Oh, boy. From back then, when we all had “Warnersonas” on irc and this one total weirdo had a PatB-sona unlike the normal fans.

Also, though: there are lots of legit opinions about who the very best Animaniacs character is, but if you say it’s not Slappy Squirrel, then you’re objectively wrong. And Pinky/Brain, which totally normal people all shipped back then and was a totally normal mundane expected thing, was called Pinky/Brain or maybe Pinky x Brain but smushnames weren’t a thing yet you kids so that’s just what the ship is called, also they are married. My gay mouse uncles were married back then and it was canon. Sorry, I don’t make the A! rules. /j /s /lh. (JOKES ASIDE THE PINKY/BRAIN SHIPPING LITERALLY HAPPENED IMMEDIATELY LIKE THE FIRST MINUTE IN SEPT A! AIRED SO STOP REWRITING HISTORY TO MAKE THE GAY MICE STRAIGHT YOU ARE LITERALLY RUINING MY QUEER CHILDHOOD.)

Side Note: I see a few of you from the og usenet/IRC #watertower days around here sometimes. I know who you are, I know where you live, I – wait, no. I, quite seriously do, kid, guys, although I met some of you irl a very, very long time ago.

og A! fandom peeps - I want you to know that I had a ball back then. You’re still some of the best people I’ve ever known, you and the rest of early Internet fandom, when we were just some weirdos and nerds before the Internet was “cool” or even a thing that most people understood or even recognized! I seriously love you guys. I hope that life has been awesome to you all, and to your loved ones at every turn, treated you well, and you’ve had a blast every minute. I know stuff is tough sometimes. Hang in there. I am rooting for you all every day, seriously. Thank you so much. I can never pay you all back, and I will always love and care. <3 <3

...To everyone else – I’ll continue this series soon, once I can swallow my pride a little bit harder. I’ll be around a bit spottily this summer due to travel, but more so this fall, and hope to post a bit more this week about this fandom history “stage.” And also share some other stuff I keep putting off posting.

Thanks for reading! See you very soon, for the next installment.

What about the PPPGALF, NERD?!?…

That was an Animania IV thing, I’ll get to that very soon. Give me a minute.

Also shut up, Yakko Warner. Shut up. Yes, I heard you, nearly 30 years ago. And you know what, I did! That’s why I have no time to write or post any of this, I am WAY too freaking busy. Now lay off, willya?

Until next time, AIE!, bleugh, Goddess Grapes and harfy QORN.

slappy is gay. i have proof

#animaniacs #pinky and the brain #patb #brinky #animanics reboot #og animaniacs #og animaniacs fandom history #early internet fandom history #fandom history lessons #why am i even doing this #what is wrong with me #what why how #animaniacs 1993 #animanics 2020 #yakko wakko and dot #usenet #irc #early internet fandom history like 1993 - 1997/8

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sflow-er · 1 year

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Good morning Sflow :)

For the ask game I'd love to hear your thoughts about these two, if you feel like answering (no pressure though!):

🍭why did you start writing?

🌿how does creating make you feel?

Thank you. Wishing you a lovely day! <3

Good evening, friend 💛

I saved your ask for last because these are both really deep questions, and I've actually spent a lot of time reflecting on them today, especially the first one. So, exactly the kind I'd expect from you, and they deserve the kind of rambling personal answers you know to expect from me.

I'll put a cut here to make it easier for people to scroll on if they aren't interested, but of course anyone who is interested is welcome to read my answers!

🍭why did you start writing?

I guess the short answer is, as a creative outlet. But there is also a very long answer, as I've started writing several times over the course of my life.

On the first time, I started for my little brother. We played a lot of imagination games when we were kids, and I wanted to expand on those. We had an imaginary world with about two dozen characters but could only play a few of them at the same time, the stories were 'lost' when the game ended, and I had too many ideas anyway. So I started drawing and writing some of them down. This first phase went on from age 9 to 14 or so.

On the second time (overlapping the first), I started for narrative closure. A video game that I was completely obsessed with had a sad ending, so I wrote another. It was fun, so I went on to another story I wanted to continue, characters I wanted to expand on, and so on. I wrote most of these in my English notebook, for which I also got extra credit and feedback from my English teacher.

After a couple of years of just writing in my notebook, I discovered that I was doing a thing called fan fiction, and there were places to put it online. So I started doing that. Eventually, I got an original idea, and I wrote a story of about 50k and even started a sequel. This second phase lasted from age 13 to 19/20.

Then I started at uni. Life got in the way, and my creativity was gone. I never finished the sequel, and even when I eventually got obsessed with a new piece of media and tried to write something for it, I just couldn't get anything coherent down. I eventually took down all my old fics too, thinking that chapter of my life was closed for good. This phase lasted until I watched Young Royals at the age of 33.

On the third time, I started as an outlet for my suddenly reborn creativity - and my still very fragile ace identity. I found the rich world of YR incredibly inspiring and wanted to continue the story (as we didn't even know if there would be an S2). I also really wanted to contribute something to the fandom that was growing around it, but I didn't have the confidence or the ideas to focus on Wilmon.

Well, as luck would have it, there was a veritable blank slate of a minor character who would be perfect for a canon expansion and even gave me a vague ace vibe for some reason. And if I made him asexual, well, figuring out how he felt about various stuff would be a good excuse to work on myself on the side. I wasn't sure if I actually had the guts to make that part of his characterisation visible in the fic, and he'd have to be very different from me as I never liked self-inserts, but yeah. That could be interesting.

I'm still in this third phase, although the self-reflection has taken a backseat now.

🌿how does creating make you feel?

It's hard to describe. One part of it is just plain relief, because it gets to a point where you really just need an outlet for all the creative energy. One part is this huge sense of accomplishment and satisfaction over seeing the thing you imagined and planned come together. It was just something you cooked up in your head, and now it's out there, making sense. Or at least being its own aesthetic/artistic entity. Either way, you did it, wow.

And of course one part is the joy of knowing that people enjoyed something you made and/or it touched them. I had sort of forgotten about that while I wasn't writing, and I'm very grateful to have experienced it again.

Thank you again for these wonderful asks!

Ask list for reference.

#prompted personal disclosure #ask game #writing ask #fic writer asks #fic writing #scatteredpiecesofme #ace fic

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transboysokka · 11 months

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hi, it's me. after years and years... i have returned to tunglr...

I was on here around 2011 for the first time and was a semi-famous blog called neckwear lolol (i was also in the vowel fam like a decade ago and i was jaaaaaaaaaaaaaake or something, what a throwback). i took a few years off and came back from like 2016-2017 with a bunch of urls (like chrisaliss, stylesbicon, lots of star trek ones...) that are all dead and locked in whatever old account i had

and now im back and am going to regret this A LOT so im not sure how invested to get into this site or if i wanna just stick to like. twitter.

ANYWAY

hi, im chris. he/him, idk how old people on this site typically are anymore but id be a dinosaur by old standards. late twenties, so

PLEASE dont interact with me if youre in your teens...

i live in taiwan, im a teacher. i lived in america a long time ago but i left because im trans and lolol good luck getting hired as a teacher if youre trans in THAT country, am i right???

i just KNOW this is gonna become a fandom blog AGAIN... right now im really into avatar the last airbender

i've been a huge fan of atla since the day it first premiered on nickelodeon...

you know, i actually never missed a single episode in its original run. but ive lately rediscovered it and... wow im really going back to my cringey tumblr roots bc i ship again...

ride or die zukka babey!

wow thats an ugly z

my contributions to fandom in the past have been dumb memes, headcanons, and ficlets- i love to get into specific character's heads so def hit me up with a challenge or prompt if you're down!

ugh anyway yes please chat with me, interact with me, whatever and ill see if this place is any fun any more...

i really hope not because my productivity is about to go way down if it is!

#about me #intro

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morrow-dim · 2 years

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I came across “Remember, I Am the One Who Took Off Your Cape” the other day and can’t stop thinking about it 😭 Thank you so much for writing it!! 🖤💛 Have you been enjoying Triple Crown so far (and are there any other BL webtoons you’re enjoying)?

Hello, Anon! I haven’t posted on Tumblr in nearly a year (11 months!). I had to reset my password. 😅 But it’s great that Tumblr’s notif system still works because I’m so keen to talk about BL webtoons! 😍

But before that . . . wow. “Remember, I Am the One Who Took Off Your Cape” will (probably) be my sole contribution to the fandom, but it’s close to my heart. I’m touched that you’re touched by it! 😭 I’m also embarrassed to say that I’m only 4 episodes in to Triple Crown. (Yikes!) I had a lot of hesitation because I have issues with Tappy Toon (I’m only on Lezhin or Tapas these days). Then I got distracted by Solo Leveling (yes, I’m about to rec the webtoon), which I devoured in roughly three weeks. Am now waiting for the side stories. Whatever hype you’ve heard about Solo Leveling is true (and I’m currently trying to finish a fic). Although it’s not BL, you don’t have to squint very hard to find those ships. 😉 But getting back to Triple Crown . . . I’ll get there eventually! Though I have to say that the ‘Prologue’ is the perfect webtoon. ❤️

So, aside from Solo Leveling, I have two BL webtoon recs for you and both can be found on Lezhin. They’re character-based stories with art styles that I enjoy. Neither are as gorgeously drawn and colored as Kingmaker, but really, how many webtoons are? What these two webtoons have going for them is brilliant storytelling.

1. “Do You Still Like Me?” Technically, this is an ABO webtoon but it features two alphas, which is the most interesting dynamic to me. The relationship between the two leads is fantastically developed and very rich. The webtoon is a slow burn that begins with a ‘fuck buddies’ trope. (It’s a contract relationship. Literally.) I’m also attracted to the inter-racial aspect of it since one of the characters is Korean and the other British. Most of the story takes place in London. I’d go so far as to say that the way this creator treats the alpha-alpha relationship has fundamentally changed how I view alpha-alpha dynamics moving forward. The structure of the webtoon is also complex, moving between multiple (contemporary) time periods and places. If some parts don’t 100% make sense the first time you read them, have a little patience. The creator always rewards you. When the pieces fall into place, I’ll go over certain episodes and think, ‘Wow. That has even more layers than I originally thought.’ Highly recommended. (This is an ongoing webtoon in its second season.)

2. “The Beast Must Die” This webtoon is my favorite webtoon of all time, BL or otherwise. It’s also one of the darker webtoon I’ve read because the central character – Kang Moo – is a true psychopath. The creator clearly researched psychopathy so that his/her depiction of it is fairly accurate and the situations created very plausible given the conditions of the webtoon. When I decided to jump into fanfic, I read the two books that are referenced in the webtoon just so I could have a basic understanding of the condition. I won’t spoil the plot for you, but I love this webtoon to pieces. It begins when the two main characters are university students and spans over a decade. Like the rec above, the dynamic between the two leads is truly unique. I have never read anything like it in the webtoon world. However, I’d warn you that the weakest part of this webtoon is the second side story (it was infuriating, tbh), but the main fic, the first side story, and the side tracks/collections are exceptional. (This is a completed webtoon.) Kang Moo is an utterly compelling character. (And gorgeous. Really gorgeous.)

That’s it from me, Anon! I bet you’re a little sorry now that you asked for webtoons I’m enjoying after reading all my rambling. 😂 There’s more! (There’s always more. 😉) But these two are a cut above the rest, as is Kingmaker. ❤️

#ask

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3wisellamas · 3 years

Text

Wow. So. Had a really fucked-up dream, since that's apparently what we're all doing in the Deltarune fandom right now. Didn't think I'd end up with one, but here we are. And I might have a new twist on the REALLY messed-up AU thing, a la Salt Route...

Gonna call this the Green Thumb AU, for reasons that will eventually become very, very obvious.

(Shoutout to @twitchyglitchy and @dungeonraided, who contributed a bit of this after I woke up and started ranting about my dream in the Treble Rebels server! Will note things that specifically came from them.)

So, I dreamt that, like Salt Route, there was a bonus route if you did certain things in chapters 1 and 2. I'm not sure what exactly those specific things were, but I think they had something to do with breaking the fourth wall, like solving that one puzzle to get Jevil's key before going to the castle and learning the room order, or hitting the switch on that one tree without making the room dark, or recruiting The Original Starwalker, maybe even hacking your save file a little to give Noelle a taste of Susie Tea, etc. If you did everything correctly, upon reaching Spamton's shop and asking him about the Knight...the phone would ring. And it would be Gaster on the other end.

Unfortunately, I don't remember any of the exact lines in this scene, but he basically goes "I'm sorry I didn't tell you what exactly I was selling, but aren't you happier like this? Aren't you glad to know the truth about this beautiful world you inhabit?" (In Wingdings of course, and he specifically used the phrase "beautiful world" a bunch of times.) Spamton is surprisingly distraught by suddenly being contacted again out of the blue, and the player / Kris, who was listening in to the conversation via another phone (like a linked landline kind of situation) has the option to either say that Gaster is right, that the world is beautiful, and let him go, or "Call him out on his bullshit." (Yes, that was the exact wording in my dream. XD ) I'm not sure what would've happened from choosing the former (probably abandons the route and lets things continue as normal), but choosing the latter offends Gaster, and he hangs up immediately. And, somehow, this brings Spamton back to lucidity a little, where he's more in control of himself and genuinely starts to see Kris as a friend, and he stops selling trash and instead stocks a few healing items and useful bits of junk he finds in the Trash Pile.

Which turns out to be a good thing, because Gaster then finds someone else to corrupt.

Now, this wasn't actually a part of the dream, but something contributed by the two people I mentioned up there: At some point you can find a key to the back room of Sweet Cap'n Cakes' junk shop, sorta like the back room of the Skelebros' house in Undertale. Inside you find that someone's actually been gardening, or trying to anyway, with a bunch of pots strewn around and everything wilted. Specifically, you can check around to get the following:

“* It's what looks like a small, wilted rose in a vase.”

“* It looks like someone was trying to transplant a lemon tree sapling, but it wilted.”

So, back to the dream, to find out why this is relevant. Things proceed relatively normal from there, until you get to the basement of Queen's mansion, where instead of Spamton NEO as the chapter's secret boss...you find Sweet. And something is clearly very wrong right off the bat; first off, he's wrapped in those vines that are all over the place down there, which are even plugged into him like wires (not THOSE wires, that's a different angsty Sweet AU, but like...regular speaker cables, except vines.) He's got a few garden pots with him, trying desperately to grow flowers, specifically GOLDEN flowers, but it's obviously not quite working out, since you know, you're kind of in a computer world with no real soil or even sunlight. And, when you speak to him, he immediately starts rambling about how someone told him all about the nature they don't have in the artificial Cyber World, and how he wants to see it so badly. Eventually he just starts listing off different genus and species of trees and plants, specifically poisonous / dangerous ones, and this slowly works its way into a rant on the cycle of decay, and how "Everything rots!", and he then battles you, to perpetuate that cycle!

Now, at this point, remember, Kris is alone down there in the basement. So, of all people, who comes to round out your party but Cap'n and K_K! There's even a few lines (though I didn't remember them when I woke up ;-; ) that indicate K_K was also targeted by Gaster, and he tried to speak to them too, but it didn't quite stick. But, the two of them are ready to defend you from Sweet, and, hopefully, get him back!

...And then I woke up before the battle started. *facepalm* But, I thought a little more about the battle and the aftermath later, and took it to the server for input, so I'll go ahead and throw all that here too!

-So, the battle arena is pretty much the same as the first SCC battle, with the two speakers on either side that the attacks mostly come from, though they're covered in vines just like Sweet. And at the top, instead of all three of them as stick figures dancing around, it's just Sweet, and he's standing there, completely still, maybe with a couple of his flowerpots with him.

-All of his attacks are synced up to the music, again like the first SCC battle. However, they're MUCH harder, and come a lot faster since the music will obviously be a remix of their fight theme (maybe with a ton more bass, since it's Sweet's solo theme!) And as a bonus, if you try to Fight, while Kris' attack bar looks normal Cap'n's and K_K's will be longer, and have the "sweet spot" in a place where it'll be on the beat as well!

-Sweet's attacks are mostly blasts from those speakers again, though in much more complicated patterns. He can also cause the vines to whip out from them, either to hit you or even split the box so that you don't have as much room to maneuver.

-He can also summon those bomb walls from the Spamton NEO / Mettaton fight, causing you to go into Yellow Soul mode to shoot your way through them. However, unlike Spamton's, they drop down onto you from the top of the box.

-His ultimate attack, the "Bass Drop", is where he summons his turntable and floats above you, dropping more of those bullets from the overworld action sequences! They fall in a more or less set pattern, with the player needing to find the right spots on the screen to avoid them.

-In order to Spare him, you need to snap all of his vines, just like with Spamton NEO's wires! To do this, you need to order K_K to either throw Kris (1 attempt), or both Kris and Cap'n (2 attempts). There's a LOT of those vines, though, so even if your aiming skills are good it's gonna take a while.

-Another thing you can do with Cap'n and K_K, courtesy of @dungeonraided, is have them play music along with Sweet, which throws him off a little and also makes the borders of the battle box flash green and blue, in order to illustrate the beat of the music and give a visual indicator for Sweet's attacks, making them easier to anticipate.

-If you choose to defeat Sweet by Fighting, Cap'n and K_K will reluctantly do it, at first giving comments about how they don't want to hurt their bandmate, but then eventually they'll accept that he's too far gone and it needs to be done.

After the battle, regardless of which method you use, Sweet is...pretty much toast. He falls over like Spamton NEO, and his speaker falls open, revealing he'd been trying to grow flowers inside of himself as well, and these DID manage to bloom. But, Cap'n and K_K will point out that he's destroyed, and take him back to the shop to clean him out and repair him, but not before quickly making you an item out of some of his parts! (Don't worry, they'll find more.) If you defeat him pacifist-style, you get the item Stereo Heart (named by @twitchyglitchy! ), which is a shield-ish thing that Kris can equip. If equipped after you get back out of the basement, maybe Ralsei will comment that it looks like it's surrounded by flowers, and Susie will ask "Does anyone else hear some kind of sad song?" If you defeat him violently, Kris will receive the Sound Blaster weapon, which when equipped one of your party members will note that they hear an odd buzzing sound coming from it.

When you make it back to Castle Town, Sweet is fixed! But, he's very clearly no longer himself -- something is missing (which you may or may not have equipped), and he's now more forgetful and cautious, but also has a new lease on life, appreciating small things (and his homies!) a lot more. Of course, Cap'n and K_K are now MUCH more protective of him, and shoot down any requests to go take a walk and see some nature...

(And as one final kicker, if you took this route, you can also see a few rose bushes and lemon trees behind their shop, in a little garden. ;v; )

#i love how we all just collectively dumped all our angsty aus onto sweet XD #between this and wired sweet au and beatdown au...#deltarune #sweet cap'n cakes #deltarune sweet #undertale #sweet #gaster #spamton #i seriously don't know where the idea of sweet being a gardener came from but i'm totally headcanoning it now #green thumb au

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earlgreytea68 · 2 years

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I have just stumbled into the Your Dr. Who Chaos Verse stories. Given the fractured state of older fandom work collections on Live Journal, I am ever so greatfull you provided links to download everything on AO3!

I loved your Oliver BBC Sherlock stories snd as happens all the time with a favorite fandom writer, you interests ultimately diverged from mine and you began writing for fandoms I didn’t connect with. It happens… but I was so sorry to see you go somewhere I couldn’t follow and wished you all the best.

Then, just recently, I stumbled on to Dr. Who, particularly the tenth doctor, and while very late to the game, fell in love.

Just imagine my utter delight to find the treasure trove of the Chaos verse fics. There was suddenly a hoard of new works from a lost, beloved author. I have been diving deep and gorging myself on these wonderful stories. They are incredible. Your characterizations of Ten and Rose are spot on, and I love the kids. What wonderful personalities you have given them. I’m not sure if I have a favorite as I love them all. Watching how the children have influenced The Doctor and Rose has been charming. I still have much ground to cover- Brem has just started Harvard.

My main goal here is to let make sure you know people are still finding these stories and getting besotted by them. Thank you first for writing them, and thank you again for preserving them for so long!

As I was writing this it occurred to me that I should ask you if you had any advice about how to find the best classic ten/rose fics these days as I know nothing about the fandom infrastructure outside of a few Tumblr fic rec pages and lots of broken live journal pages. I have found whofic.com, but don’t know how to find the really good stuff. Any guidance you have to provide will be much appreciated.

You are such a gem!

Okay, this makes me so, so, so happy <3 My fondness for the Chaosverse (AND BREM) is enduring. I think I have never seen a fic in my head as clearly as I saw Brem at the end of the original "Chaos Theory," taking charge of the situation ugh. He came into his own at 4 years old and got his teeth in my heart and he really never left go. JUST STARTING HARVARD haha you have SO MUCH BREM ahead of you <3 And the girls, too, of course. <3

But anyway, I am really so glad that those stories are still findable and people are still finding them! I tried to import them all to AO3 but even with the import tool, it was a pain, the multi-chapter thing REALLY seemed to throw everything off, so I'm glad the link at least works to get people over there!!

I know well the heartache of trying to find fics from a fandom that was big in LJ days. At least whofic.com at least caught some of it, although I never posted over there. I can't see that I ever did a rec list for Whofic. I'm trying to remember some of my favorite authors. Here's one. And another. Another one. I'm trying to do this through dim distant memories and wow, it is really hard to be on Teaspoon and not have any ways to sort! Like, even sorting by oldest instead of newest would be useful to me, as I wouldn't know very much of the new stuff, presumably. Maybe other people who were around in those LJ days can contribute their distant memories, too!

Every Advent season, I still have a few loyal folks requesting Chaosverse and it warms my heart. :-) I really hope you enjoy the rest of the 'verse!

#doctor who #chaosverse #ten x rose

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astoldbygingersnaps · 2 years

Text

Harper’s 2021 Fic Wrap-Up

[sighs]

in some ways i’ve been Dreading making this post because my output this year is just

so much less than the previous year, and it’s lowkey depressing to see that reflected in words and numbers.

for all that 2020 was weird and messy and horrible, 2021 was easily a much worse year for me, and frankly one of the worst years of my life thus far. i’ve made references both on here and on twitter to why the year sucked so much ass and why i spent so much time away from social media and writing, but suffice to say a lot of factors contributed to me being The Ghost of Fanfiction past this year.

still! even though writing was hella difficult for me, i at least managed to turn a few things out this year, so let’s talk about them!

projects i worked on/completed in 2021:

lovers alone wear sunlight (shiita; 70,450 words; in progress):

on the one hand, it’s a fucking tragedy that after all the work i did last year i only produced one (1) chapter of star trek au, on the other hand, if i had to produce a single chapter of this fic in twelve months, i’m glad it was this one.

overall, i’m a lot less happy with LAWS than i was with the first two parts of star trek au, but i think that’s because this section of the story is so crucial and everything i’ve been building up to since day one so i feel like i’m kinda choking under the pressure.

THAT SAID, i AM happy about how 3.3 came out and i’m glad that (almost) all of the cats are out of the bag. the truth is i’ve been waiting to write the confession scene between shisui and itachi for AGES, and it was both freeing and terrifying to rip that bandage off because i knew after this chapter things would never be the same. after danzogate we’re never going back to the comfortable mission of the week formula filled with wacky interactions with the crew and flirty, will-they won’t-they? banter between itachi and shisui that peaked in parts one and two. and, i’m sad to say it, but in the backend of part three things are only going to get Worse, my loves. whoops!

HOWEVER, i also feel Incredibly satisfied comparing this chapter to the very first chapter of SBTTS, and seeing a) how much these characters have changed and b) how believable i feel like that journey has been. we’ve watched itachi go from an overly logical, pissy, stick-in-the mud fighting with his own nature to someone who, while conflicted, has found a way to make the two very different halves of himself far more cohesive. (whether this mindset will stick around after the events of the next few chapters of LAWS, well.. we’ll see!)

meanwhile, shisui has gone from someone who, while a genuinely good person and a good leader, has let his flaws and fears take the wheel and has made some... um... interesting! choices! as a result! and said choices have pushed that deeply buried darker side to him that we first saw in the confrontation scene with kabuto in part two closer and closer to the surface. with that in mind, maybe don’t be too surprised if our boy goes just a liiiittle off the rails post-danzonapping...

wow that was stupid long, but hey. i’ll always find a million and one words to say about my beloved star trek au. more than anything, i’m excited to get this story back on track and bring part three to its very explosive close, so stay tuned!

lazarus taxon (shiita; alternate universe; 22,315 words; in progress):

oh how i love this silly little fic. the funny thing is i originally came up with this idea for an entirely different ship and fandom YEARS ago, but i was never able to use it because said fandom went completely nuclear and was unfuckingtouchable (no, i won’t name names.) still, i loved it so much i was determined to find a way to reuse it, and considering i could find a way to turn a paper bag into a shiita au it was only inevitable we’d end up here.

more than anything, i love how fun this fic is. i love itachi as a cold, cynical businessman with a very deeply hidden heart of gold and enough daddy issues to fill a mosasaurus’ stomach and shisui as his manic pixie dream paleontologist one night stand. and, it was also a great opportunity to show off two of my biggest passions: dinosaurs and animal behavior. frankly, the levels of self-indulgent content in this fic are Unreal.

as always, it’s a delight to write a less depressed, less traumatized version of itachi and see what kind of person he could be if he was just a weird little man with a dad who’s mean to him instead of y’know. a child soldier manipulated into committing genocide. meanwhile, it’s been a blast to peel back the layers of shisui as a character, and go from presenting him as this handsome, morally righteous man of mystery who shows up in itachi’s life to challenge his beliefs and push him to be a better version of himself to seeing the person he actually is.

the last chapter of this fic is like. halfway finished, but to be honest i’m not super happy about the plot beats and the pacing, so i might end up scrapping a good chunk of it. either way, i’m excited to bring this story to its conclusion and my goal is to have it finished by the end of the year, so we shall see what happens.

take my hand, wreck my plans (shiita; canon divergence; 19,517 words; completed):

confession: in some ways, i kind of hate this fic.

don’t get me wrong: i think it’s one of the better things i’ve written technically as the character/relationship progression is solid, the dialogue is solid, and i feel like it flowed really well. but also, there’s a not nice part of me that resents the fact that of all the things i’ve written, THIS is the fic that’s blown up when there are other projects i’ve put more work into that have gotten a lot less attention. and i hate to say that because i don’t want to be ungrateful, because i truly do cherish the comments and feedback, but it’s hard not to be a little bitter seeing other works of mine that i feel are more deserving flop.

ON A MORE POSITIVE NOTE, i do love the way itachi and shisui’s relationship came through in this fic. it was a nice change of pace to take things back to canon and imagine the better future they could have had (and deserved!). and by working in a canon setting, it made the transition of a friends-with-benefits situation more believable to me because i think their friendship is genuinely one of the most compelling aspects of them as a ship.

i also really like the potential of this setting and how in the moment where this story takes place both itachi and shisui are in a transitional period. they’re both growing up in a world where neither one of them really expected to live that long and dealing with what that means for them. for itachi, that’s moving towards a goal that previously seemed impossible (i.e., becoming the hokage), and for shisui that’s realizing he needs to get his shit together and stop hiding from the things he really wants (i.e., the cagey settling down conversation he had with itachi).

also... the sex. i’ve said before i’m not a person that writes a lot of sex, but this fic definitely helped me get more comfortable working it into my writing.

i’ve gone back and forth about whether or not i’d want to add anything else to this ‘verse. while i’d certainly be interested in exploring what a hokage itachi would look like in this au and how that would affect shisui and itachi’s relationship, there’s also something deeply appealing in having a project that’s actually finished. so, i’ll never say no to a sequel, but maybe don’t hold your breath waiting for one.

pack up (don’t stray) (shiita; alternate universe; 4,967 words; in progress):

seguing into what may be my favorite thing i wrote this year! i have to say i am sad that band au hasn’t gotten a lot of attention, especially because it was born from a period where i was really creatively struggling and really excited to share something i was genuinely inspired by, but what can you do.

in a lot of ways, this fic came to life because i was experiencing a lot of super intense and negative emotions and a bunch of stresses were piling up at once and i needed a place to put all the ugliness. but! it also came, like most of my fic ideas, from a shitpost alexa and i exchanged via text message that rapidly spiraled out of control.

mostly i was feeling like i was in a rut and like i was writing a lot of the same interactions and dynamics, so i wanted to take two characters i’ve worked with a lot and use them in a very different fashion than i usually do. in some ways it was weirdly nerve-wracking to intentionally write itachi and shisui, characters i genuinely love, in a way that was so unflattering and at times deeply ugly, but it was a good challenge.

birk put it best by saying the tragedy of band au is that it’s just the story of two adults growing up and growing away from each other. the most important thing for me was that even though this was a story in itachi’s pov, i never wanted things to be one-sided or for there to be a villain, because i do feel like at the end of the day they’re both responsible for the demolition of this relationship (and, if you’ve read the previews for chapter two you’ll know that itachi is handling their breakup, um. poorly)

(if you ask alexa tho she’s Team Itachi and shisui can die in a fire in this fic)

(lowkey i’m Team Shisui but we don’t need to talk about it!)

anyway, i really deeply love this fic. i think it has some of the best writing i’ve ever produced and there are lines that to this day still kind of suckerpunch me in the heart if i think about them too hard. i won’t lie, the reception has dimmed some of my original interest in this fic, but it’s definitely still an active wip.

goals i have for 2022:

to be frank, i’m in a not cute place with a lot of things in my life and with writing in particular, so i don’t want to make a lot of huge goals and then feel crappy about not accomplishing them

that said, since the second chapter of atonement au is a scene and a half away from being finished, i think it’s a safe bet it’ll be done soon-ish.

the second chapter of band au is about 40-50% finished, so you should expect that by the end of the year.

jurassic world au is... well, we’ll get there.

to save the best for last, my love and light, star trek au. so help me god, if i don’t publish a chapter for her this year, it’s all over.

and that’s it! i wish i could feel as proud of this wrap-up as i did last year’s, but really all i can do is hope that 2022 will be a better, and kinder, year. as always, thank you to everyone who left comments and kudos and bookmarks, it really does mean the world even if i’ve been super MIA and haven’t been great about saying so.

until next time!

#my fic #this came out more than depressing than i wanted so uh. oops

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mittensmorgul · 3 years

Note

Incoming sad rant about the spn ending. Don't read if you're not interested in reading something like that, but I literally don't know anyone in real life I can talk about this with, and I really need an outlet:

Sometimes I can put the way SPN ended out of my head and think "it's just a stupid show. I don't have to accept the finale, and the writers/network are wrong." But other times I just get gripped with really intense sadness at the disrespect that was done to my favorite characters. To the point where I'll sit still for hours a day, just wallowing in it. It ruins my whole day and mood. And then I think to myself "I'll just find some other stories that end better!" but then I get sad again, cuz I don't think I will ever love other characters as much as I love Dean and Cas, and then I spiral again thinking about all the potential this unique beautiful love story had, and how we're never going to get the closure we deserve.

I really hate that after all this time, I'm a grown ass adult getting sad over fictional characters. I know it's not that trivial, but I sometimes wish it was so I could get over it 😞

Hi hi, and first of all *socially distanced internet hugs* I’m sorry you don’t have an outlet, but you’re always welcome to chat with me (if you come off anon we can talk privately if you want. My DM’s are always open, even when it takes me a bit to reply. no one should have to feel alone in this.)

I’m actually gonna start at the bottom of your message and work my way up, because I also, as a grown-ass adult, get sad over fictional characters. And I need to emphasize that this is the *point* of fiction. A well-written and developed fictional character is *indistinguishable in our minds from an actual real human being.* The way we react to them *feels exactly the same to our brains and bodies* as how we react to real people, and that’s a testament to just how well developed Dean and Cas were in canon.

I am not a young person. I have engaged with a lot of media over my life, and have *never* felt this strongly about fictional characters before, so I understand what you mean when you struggle to think about finding another story that ended better, or struggle to think about finding other characters you might become this attached to or experience this sort of emotional investment in. And I think there is another factor you didn’t consider there: The vast majority of other media I have engaged with, I was able to relate to on a level of “oh that’s nice for them” or “wow that sucks for them.” I have never, and possibly never will again, feel so utterly invested in fictional characters, to the point where it affects my real life as much as Supernatural has. Period.

I will likely never experience *literal physical lovesickness* over two fictional characters ever again. I hadn’t ever experienced it *in my own real life* before, and yet 15.18 triggered all those symptoms in me. As an aromantic person, this was pretty shocking to me. It also says a lot about just how real these characters feel to us, and how important they have become to us. They make us feel this! This is not an accident. It’s *incredibly difficult* to create fictional characters with this range and depth of emotional connection, and yet here we are.

I think that’s the biggest evidence possibly to present in defense of the statement that THIS IS NOT JUST SOME STUPID SHOW.

Other evidence: this fandom, still going strong after 15 years. Look at every SPN convention for proof. Look at AO3, where there are more posted stories about Dean and Cas than literally any other pairing on the planet (by a not-small margin, too). If that isn’t enough evidence, we have fanart to look at as well. Look through @theroadsofararchive where at the time of this posting there are over 40,000 artworks catalogued, and more being added all the time. Same with @canonspngifs where you can search through through nearly 75,000 gifsets organized by an excellent tagging system and made by dedicated fans out of love for the thing. This is all proof that you are not alone, that so many of us care just as deeply about them as you do. Not even mentioning the people who have written hundreds of millions of words of meta, articles, and even masters theses and doctoral dissertations on Supernatural and the fandom. This is a unique thing, even within the larger fandom culture. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that your feelings for it are stupid or irrelevant or wrong.

But also don’t let anyone try to convince you that you must accept the finale as part of the story if you don’t want to. Don’t even let *yourself* believe that if you don’t want to. This show has done more to play with the themes of “what is reality” and “who gives a story meaning” and alternate universes and curses and djinn dreams to easily account for whatever the heck the finale was.

my current go-to theory: everything after Chuck’s defeat takes place in the Mockumentary Alternate Universe... it fits way too uncomfortably well... and then I just apply the fic I received in a cosmic transmission from the actual supernatural universe wrote detailing the events of what *I* hoped would transpire afterward. I know this doesn’t work for everyone, but it works for me, mostly because it *has* to. It means far too much to me not to.

You are not alone in having invested yourself into this story, and these characters. Your feelings about them are not wrong or stupid or frivolous. And the proof is everyone else who feels the same exact way, who connected to this story (and to each other through this story), and whose lives have been forever altered through this journey together. The fact that Dabb turned out to have been Chuck Junior and couldn’t see (or was prevented from showing us) what Team Free Will would’ve chosen to do with that after defeating their original creator just stands to prove to me that the finale can’t possibly be The Truth, you know?

I don’t know if any of this will help you, or provide you some small comfort right now, but maybe it will eventually. We’re all processing the loss of the show and the abject failure of story that was the finale in different ways, and I’m sure our emotional reactions will shift over time. It was just A Lot to process all in the span of a few incredibly emotional weeks-- not even mentioning how all of that emotional response was compounded by the american elections and surrounding nonsense, the general stress of enduring a global pandemic and all that entails, and *waves hands around broadly at everything else contributing to the trauma occurring in the collective of humankind right now.* We’ve all been emotionally compromised, so be kind to yourself in how you feel you’re coping with it all.

And know that no matter what, you are not alone in how you’re feeling. The grief is real, and our brains don’t care if it’s felt for fictional characters or real people. This was honestly a once in a lifetime experience for a lot of us, and not even the wtf of the finale can kill it for us if we don’t let it. I reject that particular piece of rusty rebar and choose to believe in a just and narratively coherent resolution. To do anything less feels like dishonoring the story and characters who have drawn me in and made me feel so much for them over the years. If the story itself couldn’t honor them properly, then I can choose to do so myself.

#spn 15.20 #finale what finale #seriously though none of us are alone in this #Anonymous

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mymelancholiesblues · 3 years

Text

No, Mia isn’t "low-tier" compared to Ada (morally speaking, or w/e) – a measured answer?/essay

So, a couple of Ada haters tried to put up a false symmetry between both of these characters there on twitter, and it inspired me to put my own thoughts down in a more articulate essay as to why that's (Ada's somehow being morally worse than Mia) not sustained by canon in Resident Evil.

standing there, killing time

can't commit to anything but a crime

all the good girls go to hell

'cause even God herself has enemies

and once the water starts to rise

and heaven's out of sight

she'll want the Devil on her team. ⁕

First things first: let us debunk the false symmetry that they tried to establish between these two characters with extremely distinct archetypes – and worse, the following replies to this false symmetry and its poor arguments trying to validate it, pointing out that, in fact, no, character B (that would be Ada, btw) – which is so evidently and ridiculously different from character A (and that would be Mia) – is, in fact, WAY WORSE than character A, and then proceeding to assert some unsupported propositions about misogyny in Resident Evil (which, tbh, definitely IS a recurring problem in the franchise, but that in this case particularly, little or does not apply AT ALL) and how Ada contributes to "the perpetration of a biological cold war".

Starting with what differentiates Mia from Ada grotesquely: we know NOTHING of Ada's true alliances in RE's world. Mia, however, canonically worked for a group that participated in the importation and exportation as well as the manufacturing, testing and marketing of biological weapons: "The Connections", a CRIMINAL SYNDICATE which, amongst other things, was also involved in money laundering, assassinations as well as weapons and drug trafficking. I don't care at all about Mia, so I don't intend to waste much of my time going on about her role in the plot, but people should've already realized by just that much how infinitely dishonest is to try to put these two characters as "similar" ones, or argue that Ada is somehow worse.

Another detail that shouldn't escape anyone's attention too, are the origins and nationalities of both – and yes, I intend to briefly bring up racism against eastern-Asian looking characters (a silent plague that takes form by each passing day in all fiction fandoms) and anti-China xenophobia, but for now, hold this tea there just before I drop it: Mia is canonically American, and previously a Texas-state resident; meanwhile, we have no confirmation of Ada's nationality except for her pretty evident Chinese ancestry. But, as I said, hold it there for a while.

i) espionage — the job

red so silent

wait a minute

or just a little while.

what are you looking for? ⁕

At all times that Ada's "job" was brought up in this franchise, in ALL of her cameos, she has NEVER been called a mercenary in the original Japanese. She's always referred to as a SPY. Even in RE2R, the most recent title in which she's featured in, the original text of the game makes a point of labelling her as a SPY (and not a mercenary) in the dialogue that transpires between Annette and Leon.

It's the North-American translation and correspondent localization that now and then falls for the equivocal use of this other term. This distinction is important since espionage NECESSARILY implies operating in an organized service for, perhaps a country, or a political cause, or a class/group, or a corporation, or whatever. While a mercenary is someone who's acting per their self financial interests, indiscriminately selling their specialized "labour" and skills to anyone who'll offer more.

Ada's not a mercenary, she's a spy. But Mia, in addition to being hired to a canonically criminal company, was also the handler personally assigned to Eveline. I don't care how exactly Mia got in that predicament but the fact is: Mia was canonically employed by a company that profited over illicit activities and directly watched as a family was destroyed and toyed with by this new killing machine (Eve). Yet, we can't state for sure that we know to whom or to what Ada is truly affiliated with.

ii) sources — check them

who's a heretic now?

am I making sense?

how can you make it stick?

and I'm on a trial

waiting 'til the beat comes out. ⁕

This fandom should put a little more thought into which translation and localization of the game texts, dialogues and files they are using to support their arguments. I know that in some cases the United States people have a bit of an inclination to think of themselves as the owners of the planet and deem English as the only language that matters in this world, but let's not forget that RE is a Japanese franchise (wow, insane, right?!). Therefore, the most valid script, with the greatest amount of details, and highest credibility, is the Japanese original. Throughout these years, there have been several errors in translation and localization of the Japanese original to North-American English. And, believe me, curiously enough, plenty of those concern Ada, since she's often mentioned or referred to in a very vague way – without the use of pronouns or adjectives or adverbs that could help in indicating gender. This ended up causing those details and mentions to her to get overlooked, even though in the Japanese text it was a clear reference to her character (per observation of context).

iii) the good guys — one of

head in the dust

feet in the fire

labour on that midnight wire

listening for that angel choir

you got nowhere to run

careful son, you got dreamers plans

but it gets hard to stand. ⁕

Yes, as much as haters try to minimize it, it is SIGNIFICANT that Ada saved so many important characters and stood for unquestionably heroic actions in so many moments - like stopping everything she was doing so she could help completely random Chinese civilians with the helicopter she managed to pilot in that chaos in China (yeah, I know you haters love to forget about this, but it happened, it's there in canon, and no, it wasn't her direct OR indirect responsibility what was going on in China: REPLAY RE6 and for the love of GOD, never again argue that what she did was somehow "the equivalent of evacuating a city after selling a WMD to destroy that same city". It's a case of pure intellectual dishonesty to say such a thing. It's canon that Carla was the one who caused what happens in China, PLEASE, PLAY RE6).

Furthermore, Ada shows compassion on some occasions even for characters who are directly putting her in harms ways, like Annette (in RE2 OG, right after - in order to defend herself - she slaps Annette leading her to lose balance and collapse over the sewers fences, Ada makes an effort in trying to pull Annette back and prevent her from falling) and Carla.

Replay RE4 and pay attention to it, pay attention to her solo campaign: getting involved with Leon's journey in Spain hasn't brought any real benefit to her mission or herself: Ada deviates from her main path several times due to worrying about him and trying to help him and almost ends up dead in several of these occasions over her insistence in doing so: by saving him from Bitores Mendez, by helping him and Ashley against Sadler, by confronting Krauser and stopping him.

It's so lazy to only read/listen to a file in which she says in English that "Leon might be useful to her plans" (this is way more nuanced in the Japanese original of Ada's Report), and ignore everything that was SHOWN in the game: every effort she made to ensure that Leon could rescue Ashley, remove the parasite from his and her bodies, and escape from that hell-island.

The jet-ski she left for their escape was ALREADY there before she was captured by Sadler (or you think she arranged it while she was caught?). Leon having to intervene and save her from Sadler WASN'T her plan. It WASN'T her plan to take the sample from Leon's hands. She wanted to help him get out of there with Ashley and she guaranteed he could do so, she wanted to get the sample by herself and escape too while sending that hell to kingdom's come. But, because she chose to help Leon rescue Ashley right in front of Sadler, she ends up captured.

On her end, Mia never did anything minimally compared to that, and all of her "selflessness" or self-sacrificing actions involved a much, MUCH smaller scope than Ada's: wanting to help her husband and HERSELF is not at all comparable to saving a few dozens of unknown Chinese civilians. So no, they aren't "cut from the same cloth". They don't come from the same place, nor do they share the same intentions or goals, and their contributions to the RE storyline are quite different.

iv) unknown true purpose (shades of grey)

lining up in the background

waiting for the crowd shot to be seen

in the shadow of the big screen

everybody begs to be redeemed. ⁕

In databooks, Ada is recurrently described as "a Chinese spy with extraordinary physical abilities, vigorous health and composed mind and spirit, capable of coping with grim situations and handling even the most difficult requests without losing composure". If we are paying attention to the storytelling ingame, however, we know that this isn't always the case: Ada did let her mask of unswerving emotional and physical strength fall and showed a very fragile side under strenuous circumstances a couple of times already.

Also, in these databooks, they often point out that "she has her own 'true purpose' and has FREQUENTLY betrayed organizations and clients to achieve it". Huh, we can AGAIN, by this only, see how completely different she's from Mia, who personally watched an entire family being driven to insanity by Eveline's hand.

Furthermore, in these databooks, it's often said that "this true purpose is still obscure and whether she truly cared for anyone or simply used her charms to manipulate people that crossed paths with her isn't ever clear". If people are willing to be open-minded and exercise their text comprehension skills, though, they'll see that in multiple occasions of emotional confrontation it has been established time and time again that yes, Ada DOES care. She wasn't capable of shooting Leon and there has been a couple of other times that failing to choose a cool, sociopathic calculation and pragmatical demeanour over empathy and humanity towards others has put her in harms ways: nonetheless she still chose it.

v) positive impact

I'm gonna break the cycle

I'm gonna shake up the system

I'm gonna destroy my ego. ⁕

To this point, RE's plot systematically leads us to believe that Ada has been covertly acting behind the scenes of multiple biological incidents COLLECTING INFORMATION (the job of a spy, who would've thought! lmao), that is valuable to numerous organizations, companies, groups and different contexts, but at the same time of allegedly offering to handle this knowledge for the right price to the big players involved with bioterrorism and clandestine trading of bioweapons, she's also working to sabotage said players.

This is evident throughout the franchise: she intended to hurt Umbrella's business. She outwitted and deceived Wesker multiple times. She even undermined Simmons, someone who was in a position of power in the US government and actively using that position to lead bioterrorist ventures on the parallel side.

There's no concrete evidence or hint as to what she does with the information she collects, and for all purposes and effects, I can presume that she's gathering this knowledge to assist in the discovery of countermeasures and vaccination studies. I might as well argue that she is a Chinese spy who is working against European and North-American capitalism and the imperialism that creates such monsters like the biochemical and bioweapons industry and that her real objective is to dismantle the market for bioweapons and bioterror supported mainly by the USA (see: Simmons and The Family).

That is, as long as it is unclear what her true purpose is, I have the freedom to surmise whatever the heck I want and that all of what she's been doing was for the sake of the greater "good" - and I'll even have canon moments to support this reasoning as it's clear that she regularly sabotages her customers (customers that are unquestionably established as playing for the "evil" side, with perverse intentions) - throughout the franchise. She did this on RE2, RE4, RE6 and Damnation. It's there, transparent in canon, people just choose to ignore it.

She laughs in the face of whoever she's talking to by the end of Damnation, saying she doesn't intend to deliver the Plaga; she scoffs at Simmons; she betrays Wesker and kills Krauser. She had been sabotaging Wesker for so long, that he sent Krauser to be the main agent in the mission in Spain, and Ada was just a "side effect" that he didn't have in control and had to keep an eye on, so he ordered Krauser to keep tabs on her. It's not a mutually beneficial dynamic. Ada doesn't want Wesker to succeed, she despises him; this is clear in the games in which they interact. There are even files that indicate that she was trying to double-cross and get in the way of his plans for at least 2 years before Spain, and he was constantly catching up with her. See here and here.

On her end, Mia was employed by and consciously working for a criminal syndicate.

vi) a (secretly) helping hand

oh, I'm a master pretender

just felt more alone

the further I'd go

but I'll stick around

I'll be your master defender

yeah, I'll stick around. ⁕

Ada approached characters such as John Clemens and Luis Sera, and both had a canonical intention to, in addition to putting an end to their connections with the criminal companies and organizations they've been working for, also expose and denounce them for their crimes. It's in this context that Ada comes into contact with them. And why is that?

Check John's background: he had made up his mind about disclosing Umbrella's crimes to the public. Check Luis' background: Ada went to Spain to assist in his extradition since he feared for his own life if he resolved to turn his back on the cult of Los Illuminados, and also dreaded the consequences of the liberation of Las Plagas on an international scale.

Keep in mind that Ada handed over to Wesker a USELESS Plaga sample. Wesker only got the sample currently circulating in the underground market because he went after Krauser's body. We don't know what Ada did with the master Plaga sample she obtained. We only know from Ada's Report and the Plaga Recovery file that she didn't deliver it to Wesker, and he needed to go out for a plan B to get it.

Even the G-Virus sample that fell into the hands of the clandestine business, it's possible to argue that Ada's involvement in it was flimsy, since Simmons CANONICALLY made over a thousand laboratory tests in Sherry, and, as we know, he was a leading figure in bioterrorism and bioweapons trading with the aid of his position in the US government.

But, guess what, Ada clearly is a non-white character with obvious Chinese heritage and Mia is white, so of course, OF COURSE, someone can so nonchalantly affirm that Ada, this "vile bitch", is somehow WORSE than Mia. The same Mia who watched the Bakers being destroyed. Right.

Also: trying to validate one's point by claiming anything related to the misogyny present in RE franchise, while IN THE SAME BREATH AND TWEET reducing Ada's entire character arc to that of "a sociopathic bitch cured by the magic dick of her love interest" is supposed to be a joke, right? No, really. Joke.

conclusion and a word against misogyny

we are waiting on a telegram to

give us news of the fall

I am sorry to report

dear Paris is burning after all

we have taken to the streets

in open rejoice, revolting

we are dancing a black waltz

fair Paris is burning after all. ⁕

To any Ada fan that has been reading this so far: PLEASE, I ask to consider refraining to use the "oh yes, Ada did some bad shit, bUT" take to defend the character because that isn't sustained by canon in RE, lmao. She didn't do anything evil that had an indisputable bad impact on the plot and other characters arcs. For one, I myself do love some villains, but that isn't the case with Ada.

She did do some unconventional shit yes, since she's a morally GRAY character and an anti-heroine, but by the end of the day, each and every action of hers had a positive impact on the journey of other characters and main plot. Just pay attention to it.

Like idk man, Black Widow, Elektra Natchios, Scarlet Witch and Black Cat from Marvel, Catwoman from DC, Yennefer from The Witcher (some pop culture examples that come to mind).

Saying that this is an "extremely selfish prototypal bad bitch except when it comes to the magical redeeming dick of her love interest" it's a grotesque reduction of a complex female character, and, in its attempt to critique the misogyny present in RE's franchise an expression of misogyny in itself.

Remember: Ada has actions and impact on the franchise ASIDE and IN ADDITION to her romantic involvement with Leon.

#Resident Evil #Ada Wong #Leon x Ada #Ada x Leon #Aeon #Leon Kennedy #[mine]#[meta]#//#Aeon fandom

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