Giorgio Gaber || La ballata del Cerutti (The Ballad of Cerutti) || Italian lyrics + English translation
A parody of the famous Northamerican ballads, this very Milanese hit from the Sixties details the ordinary (mis)adventures of everyman Gino Cerutti -- or, as the narrator quite bureaucratically states, "Cerutti Gino" -- a twenty-year-old from Milan and something of a minor celebrity at the neighborhood bar, where he spends most of his days loafing about. That is, until he tries to nick somebody's scooter -- and immediately gets busted by the cops in the process.
Io ho sentito molte ballate
Me, I've heard a lot of ballads
Quella di Tom Dooley, quella di Davy Crockett
The ballad of Tom Dooley, the ballad of Davy Crockett
E sarebbe piaciuto anche a me scriverne una così
And I would've liked to write one of those myself
Invece… invece niente, ho fatto una ballata
Instead… instead, no dice, I wrote a ballad
Per uno che sta a Milano, al Giambellino¹
For this guy in Milan, he lives in Giambellino
Il Cerutti, Cerutti Gino
A fellow called Cerutti, Cerutti Gino
Il suo nome era Cerutti Gino
His name was Cerutti Gino
Ma lo chiamavan Drago
But he was known as Dragon
Gli amici al bar del Giambellino
His friends down at the bar in Giambellino
Dicevan che era un mago (era un mago)
Would say he was a wizard (was a wizard)
Vent'anni, biondo, mai una lira
Twenty years old, blond hair, not a dime on him,
Per non passare guai
To avoid getting in trouble
Fiutava intorno che aria tira
He'd sniff around, see which way the wind blew
E non sgobbava mai
And never worked a second
Il suo nome era Cerutti Gino
His name was Cerutti Gino
Ma lo chiamavan Drago
But he was known as Dragon
Gli amici al bar del Giambellino
His friends down at the bar in Giambellino
Dicevan che era un mago (era un mago)
Would say he was a wizard (was a wizard)
Una sera, in una strada scura
One night, in a dark street
Occhio, c'è una lambretta²
Look, there's a Lambretta scooter
Fingendo di non aver paura
Pretending not to be afraid
Il Cerutti monta in fretta
Cerutti quickly hops on
Ma che rogna nera quella sera
Tough luck that night, though
Qualcuno vede e chiama
Someone sees and calls
Veloce arriva la pantera³
The patrol car comes quick
E lo beve⁴ la madama⁵
He gets busted by the cops
Il suo nome era Cerutti Gino
His name was Cerutti Gino
Ma lo chiamavan Drago
But he was known as Dragon
Gli amici al bar del Giambellino
His friends down at the bar in Giambellino
Dicevan che era un mago (era un mago)
Would say he was a wizard (was a wizard)
Ora è triste e un poco manomesso
He's sad now, and a little damaged
Si trova al terzo raggio⁶
Staying on the third row
È lì che attende il suo processo
He's there, waiting for his trial
Forse vien fuori a Maggio
He might get out in May
S'è beccato un bel tre mesi il Gino
Got himself a good three months, ol' Gino
Ma il giudice è stato buono
But the judge was kind
Gli ha fatto un lungo fervorino
He lectured him long and good
È uscito col condono
And let him out with a pardon
Il suo nome era Cerutti Gino
His name was Cerutti Gino
Ma lo chiamavan Drago
But he was known as Dragon
Gli amici al bar del Giambellino
His friends down at the bar in Giambellino
Dicevan che era un mago (era un mago)
Would say he was a wizard (was a wizard)
È tornato al bar Cerutti Gino
He's back at the bar, Cerutti Gino,
E gli amici nel futuro
And his friends, in the future,
Quando parleran del Gino
Whenever they talk about Gino
Diranno che è un tipo duro
They'll say that he's a tough guy
Notes
1) Giambellino is a neighborhood in Milan, born as a working-class area in the first half of the 20th century.
2) Lambretta was a famous 1950s Italian scooter.
3) Literally "the panther" -- slang for police car.
4) "Bere" means "to drink", but when someone "drinks" somebody else, it means they bust them, catch them (and in this case arrest them); it's really mostly used when the police or some sort of authority is involved.
5) Literally "the madam" -- slang for "police"; not so common anymore (but it might be more used in the North).
6) A reference to San Vittore, a well-known prison in Milan, which is divided into rows.
Imagine him coming home after a long, exhausting day of working, keys jingling as he unlocks the door at some ungodly hour of the night, footsteps falling heavy against the floor as he walks inside, exhaustion and fatigue lingering along his form.
He's still dressed in his station wear - a fitted, navy blue t-shirt with Station 141's logo printed onto the front of it, small, right on the right side of his chest, and a pair of trousers in the same color to match, hanging loosely onto him.
He should take a shower, he knows he should. He smells of sweat and sulfur, the scents clinging to his clothes and skin like a second skin, and he know that the two of you'll have to wash the bedding come morning.
But god, the sight of you in bed, dressed in a loose pair of your own shorts and one of his spare shirts, face smushed against one of the pillows as your breathing comes slow, in and out, steady - it's far too enticing to pass up so easily.
So he unbuckles his belt in a daze, stripping off his shirt, undershirt and trouser, tossing the articles haphazardly onto the floor (he tries to toss them towards the hamper, but he knows he misses, given the way his belt buckle clanks loudly against the hardwood floor of the bedroom, but, honestly, he could care less).
And he gets right into bed beside you, fingers grazing lightly over the exposed skin of your thighs, traversing upwards, fingers splayed as his palm travels over the fabric of your shorts, sneaking their way under the loose shirt of his that you wear, hand pressing against your tummy as he pulls you close.
He presses his nose into your shoulder, eyes fluttering closed as he deeply inhales the scent of your body wash, softly shushing you as you start to rouse, the way your body gently begins to shuffle as you let out the softest, sleepiest yawn, listening as he grumbles softly against your skin.
"Didn't mean to wake you, love. Go back to sleep."
His voice is so hoarse, so strained and rough from the events of the day - yelling and barking out commands to the firefighters within the ladder and engine crews that he guides - but, at the same time, it's runs smooth like honey, settling just right in your sleepy, hazy mind.
He hugs you tighter, pressing your back flush against his chest as he curls his body around you in a subtly protective manner, littering tender kisses against your neck, trying to coax you back to sleep as he lets out a soft sigh, infatuated with the way your body molds perfectly into his.
"Mmm... s'fine, John. Wha... what time s'it?"
"None of your business, that's what time. Go back to sleep. I'll be here in the mornin'... promise you that. Okay?"
He doesn't let you ask your questions. If you try to think, he knows you'll wake up, and he already feels guilty about waking you up in the first place, so he doesn't even entertain your sleepy question, giving you a promise - two, technically. That he's here now and that it'll stay that way until the two of you wake up in the dawn.
"Stubborn..."
"Always. We c'n talk in the mornin'. Sleep."
"Mmm... glad you're back home safe. Love you."
"Love you, too."
But by the time he says the words, you've already fallen back asleep, and a deep, rumbling chuckle erupts from within his chest, amused, pressing one last kiss to the corner of your jaw before letting himself fall asleep behind you, his breaths, his heartbeat falling into sync with your own.
I was reading a book of musical anecdotes written by un pernicieux rosbif an Englishman not very long after the last Napoleonic Wars and you can tell relations between our two countries were still somewhat tense 😔
At one point he goes on and on for a whole page about how gorgeous the Paris Opera is, "sumptuous", "magnificent", the interior décor is "one of the finest in the world", "a chandelier of the grandest order", and the painted ceiling!, and the blue velvet in the boxes!, and you're like "he's saying nice things? about us? 🥺" — then he concludes with:
"the opera in Paris is top-tier in every respect except if you want to listen to good opera"