#mention of anders/male hawke

[eeldritchblast]

They’re Not “Playersexual”, You’re Just Biphobic

(I was going to save this until September 23 because I thought that would be an appropriate date, but the Ask I got included in this essay just put me over the edge. So, here it is now. Buckle up.)

Bisexuality/Pansexuality is the attraction to people regardless of gender. About 4% of the USA alone (over 13.6 million people) openly identify as bisexual, according to Gallup’s latest polling. But unfortunately, bi/pan identities are so scary to some folks that they need to make up terms to avoid calling their favourite characters such. Thus, the term “playersexual” was born: a term to describe a game character who is attracted to the player character... regardless of gender.

If that sounds like it’s just a circuitous way of describing a bi/pan character, it’s because it is.

I first heard of the term “playersexual” almost a decade ago, from a Dragon Age fan complaining that Dorian was gay and thus it was “unfair” that she couldn’t romance him as female character. This fan said they wished BioWare would go back to Dragon Age II’s model of everyone being “playersexual” for “equality”.

Now, if you’ve actually played DA:2 and you’re not a bigot, you’re probably rolling your eyes just as hard as I did when I first read such a ridiculous statement. Well, prepare for this next one:

“When you make a male Hawke, Anders and Fenris are gay and Merrill is straight. Opposite is true if you make a female Hawke.”

These people are so afraid of bisexuality that they cannot even fathom its existence. They can believe in dragons and magic, but they cannot believe that a character is simply bi/pan. I find this especially hilarious for Anders, considering he had a canonical boyfriend, as confirmed both in-game and in The World of Thedas: Vol. 2 book.

I truly thought we were past this nonsense in 2023. I really, truly thought that. But then Baldur’s Gate 3 was released in full, and suddenly these same fuckers came out of the woodwork to bend over backwards avoiding calling these characters anything except bi/pan.

Note how in the above Ask, the anonymous questioner actually doubles down on avoiding addressing these two characters in particular as bi/pan!

“Playersexual” doesn’t even truly work for the characters of Baldur’s Gate 3 regardless, because the definition is oriented around attraction to the player character… which these characters are not exclusively attracted to. Here are some examples that prove otherwise:

If neither Lae’zel nor Astarion/Gale/Wyll are in a romance with the PC, Lae’zel will say she plans on propositioning one of the men for sex at the night of the tiefling party. She also flirts with Karlach in party banter.

Shadowheart expresses interest in Karlach, (“I like her. She looks like she could throw me over her shoulder and carry me to safety, should the need arise”) as well as Halsin if he leaves the party, (“he may have been misguided, but I liked looking at him.”)

Astarion flirts with nearly everyone in the party, but to just pick two examples: he mentions Wyll is the type of princely figure he used to dream about marrying, and says to Shadowheart “such a grim name for such a beautiful flower”.

Gale used to date Mystra. He also debatably flirts with Astarion by offering him some blood, after Cazador’s battle.

Wyll flirts with Lae’zel in party banter, and also refers to Halsin as a “delight” and “hunk”.

Karlach seems to have a little crush on Jaheira by the way she reacts to meeting her. She also says of Halsin, “everyone in this camp wants to climb that oak”.

Please keep in mind these are just a few examples I’ve picked out from screening through the dialogue, and there’s even more that prove the attraction to different genders these characters have is not related solely to the player. It’s just part of their identities.

In the Ask sent to me above, the anonymous questioner said they “cannot see Karlach as anything except lesbian and Astarion as gay.” This is just as bad as saying they are “playersexual” in my opinion, because yet again it’s erasing their bisexuality/pansexuality. Worse yet, it’s doing it because of the way the characters act. You cannot measure queerness based on actions and appearances being in line or not with queer stereotypes—it’s not a scale! And bi/pan folks are just as queer as lesbian and gay men, by virtue of simply being bi/pan!

All in all, I think this entire “playersexual” debate boils down to the fact that some people still refuse to see bi/pan identities as anything but “discount straight”. And that’s why people are rightfully angry when folks try to further this myth by pretending bi/pan characters don’t actually exist.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #meta #queerphobia #biphobia #panphobia

[pinkfadespirit]

Pairing: Anders/Male Hawke Rating: Mature Chapters: 5/6 Words: 20,952 Tags: Jealousy, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, Bets & Wagers, Roommates, Oblivious Hawke, Humour, Bickering, Sharing a Bed, Idiots in Love, Romantic Comedy, Past Fenris/Hawke, Minor Anders/Nathaniel Howe

Summary:

When Anders makes a bet that requires him to find a date to Aveline's wedding, Hawke is concerned that his friend might be rushing in to something that could get him hurt. That's really all it is: concern. Just regular friendly concern.

Chapter excerpt:

It was in many ways the opposite of their last return from the Deep Roads. Years ago, Hawke had made the journey alone, back to Gamlen's house in Lowtown, where he informed his mother that Carver would not be coming home. This time, Carver joined them as a fully fledged Grey Warden. Varric and Isabela left them in town, continuing on towards The Hanged Man, while Nathaniel went to find Delilah, with the promise that he and Anders would meet up again later to catch up properly now that they were no longer in any immediate danger. Anders stayed only long enough to wash up before saying that he needed to go and check on his clinic, and leaving the Hawke brothers alone with an overjoyed Leandra.

Hawke didn't know what he'd been expecting from Nathaniel now that he was safely back on the surface but it was not for him to return to the estate later that evening. 

"Anders said this was where I would find him," was his hesitant explanation as he looked around, realising that there was no sign of Anders. 

"He likely got held up at the clinic," Hawke explained.

"Then perhaps I should return another time. It's no matter. I should really see about finding somewhere to stay in the city. The inn where Delilah has been staying has no rooms available. But Varric mentioned the Hanged Man."

"Oh you don't want to stay there," Leandra cut in. "From what I've been told, you've been a good friend to Carver and Anders both. You're more than welcome to stay here until you return to your duties. We've room enough for all of you."

#handers #dragon age fanfic #dragon age 2 #m!handers #anders #male hawke #anders x hawke

[vigilskeep]

i’ve mentioned before how insane it is that you can exclusively be homophobic to anders after flirting with him as a male character, NOT when he flirts with your male character unprompted where, while equally a hell of a choice to offer the player character, it would at least make basic sense. another fun fact is that it’s ALSO only when you flirt with him as a male character that, when he over-explains the concept of bisexuality to you, you can choose to stammer like hawke has never heard of gay people before. all “i just... never considered...” which i can get more behind because you know it’s not actual straight up homophobia, and it’s also definitely continued like a flirt line and objectively a hilarious way to find that out about yourself, but still, bizarre writing. hawke you JUST flirted with him what did you THINK was going on here

#i should stop overthinking his dialogue bc it is all written bafflingly

[bluerose5]

For Old Times' Sake

Pairings: Anders(+Justice)/Male Hawke/Nathaniel Howe

Rating: M

Word Count: 6,912

Summary: After helping Nathaniel out in the Deep Roads, he and Anders have a lot to catch up on, but Garrett Hawke isn't the slightest bit deterred by the history between them.

AO3 Link. Along with links to posts from deedeemactir and zevsurana that inspired certain parts/headcanons mentioned in this fic. :D

...

Garrett kept a close eye on Nathaniel Howe.

Not that he did anything untoward, nor did Garrett think him to be a suspicious sort. On the contrary, he seemed reliable enough, and he definitely piqued the Champion's interest. 

On their way out of the Deep Roads, Garrett fell back to walk at Anders' side. They took up the rear with Fenris and Varric a few paces in front of them, Nathaniel and Carver taking the lead. Aside from Garrett, they thought it best to keep the Wardens positioned in the outer ranks to lessen the others’ chances of coming into contact with tainted blood, should the darkspawn attack again.

With Nathaniel and Anders being more attuned to the darkspawn taint than Carver, they were pretty certain that the coast was clear, but better to be safe than sorry, they said.

Garrett chose to ease his way back to Anders’ side, despite his warning stare.

“You’re supposed to be with the others,” Anders said in place of a greeting, his brow furrowed in concern.

Snorting, Garrett wrapped an arm around his waist, which almost instantly sapped Anders of all that tension.

“Perhaps, but I trust my handsome Grey Warden to come to my rescue at the first sign of trouble.”

“Is that so?” Anders asked, amused. “Also, technically, I’m your former Grey Warden. You know that.”

“I’m trying to paint a heroic picture here, my love.”

“Fair enough.”

They exchanged a warm smile.

After a moment, Garrett cleared his throat.

“So…” He trailed off, his expression sly. “Nathaniel, huh?”

Anders raised a brow at him in turn.

“What about him?” he said, but Garrett was far from oblivious, noting how he shuffled against his side.

“If I didn’t know any better,” he said, lowering his voice to a mere whisper, “I would think that you like Nathaniel.” He shrugged. “Or maybe Justice does. Or both of you.”

Anders gaped at the suggestion.

“I, uh—” He coughed, suddenly unable to meet his eyes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Uh-huh.” Garrett smirked. “Then why are you blushing?”

Without thinking, Anders smacked a hand up to his cheek, which was indeed warm to the touch, but he wouldn’t give Garrett the satisfaction of being right.

“I am not!” he objected.

“Of course not.”

Before they could devolve into a bickering mess, Nathaniel called back to the group, "We see the exit! Just ahead!"

"Oh, thank the Maker," Varric groaned. "Fresh air! And my feet are killing me!"

"Did you complain this much on the actual expedition, dwarf?" Fenris muttered.

"Before or after my brother's infamous betrayal?" he questioned, then continued on before he could get a word in. "Tell you what, I'll go ahead and save you the time of responding to that. The answer to both is yes."

Well, at least he was honest.

With a roll of his eyes, Garrett gave a fond shake of his head.

Their group made a beeline for the exit, but their return trip was only just beginning.

As expected, Carver turned to bid the group farewell, never one to linger long those days.

Despite their earlier exchange underground, Garrett immediately released his hold on Anders to approach Carver instead, wrapping him up in a tight embrace, no hesitation whatsoever. Carver had to stoop over just to reach his short, big brother. His arms hovered in the air for a split second before he returned the hug in kind.

"Must you leave so soon?" Garrett murmured. "It's always so good to see you. Makes everything feel better, if only for a moment."

Carver buried his face into his hair, releasing a shaky breath.

"You know I can't," he said. "I need to report back."

Eventually, with great effort, he pried Garrett away. His hands remained fixed upon his shoulders, keeping him at arm's length.

Garrett swallowed thickly.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Alright. Just—Just stay safe, you hear? Be careful."

Carver spared him a smile.

"Always am, but you do the same. Don't go setting the city aflame again anytime soon, alright?"

Garrett chuckled.

"I'll try my best."

Once he departed, Garrett turned to the others. Rather than linger on their sympathetic looks, he addressed Nathaniel directly.

"What about you?" he asked, head cocked to the side. "How long are you sticking around these parts? Or do you have some urgent Grey Warden business to attend to as well?"

Nathaniel shrugged.

"I'm going to send my report to the Commander. Then, I—"

"The Commander?" Anders narrowed his eyes at that. "I thought you were here on the First Warden's orders."

"I am," Nathaniel answered, a bit too quickly, but it didn't take a genius to catch how defensive he was. "The First Warden ordered the investigation, but is it so bad that Darrian wants to keep tabs on the rest of us? After everything we've been through?"

"He doesn't keep tabs on me," Anders pointed out, trying his best not to feel insulted by that fact, but ultimately failing.

Crossing his arms over his chest, Nathaniel scoffed.

"So far as you know," Nathaniel retorted. "Do you honestly believe that one of the Kings of Ferelden, that the Hero of Ferelden himself, couldn't track you down if he wanted?"

"Well, he certainly hasn't reached out to me at all, if that was the case," Anders stated, bitter.

Nathaniel bristled at his tone.

Garrett exchanged a wary glance with the others.

Maybe it would be best to intervene somehow.

"Hey, now, guys, let's just—"

Both of them snapped their heads to the side in tandem, glaring at the intrusion.

"Stay out of it!" they snapped.

Garrett threw his hands up in surrender.

"Staying out of it," he agreed.

"You want to know why the rest of us haven't contacted you over the years?" Nathaniel spat.

"Enlighten me," Anders sneered.

"Because you left, just as you always do," Nathaniel stated, jabbing a finger in his direction. "Instead of going to Commander Tabris, instead of coming to me when you had trouble with the Wardens, you left!" Drained of what energy he had left from their excursion, he pursed his lips, his expression hurt. "I didn't even get a goodbye. Then again, should I have expected anything else? Our beloved Anders, always the escape artist." 

When he didn't respond, Nathaniel took a deep breath, staring off into the distance, his jaw clenched.

"I wanted to contact you, but Darrian insisted that we give you your space. He didn't want you to feel coerced to stay. Maker, you know that he barely keeps his ties to the Wardens as is. He was trying to be understanding of what you wanted."

"Then why even bother sending you out here in the first place?" Anders countered. "Obviously, the First Warden is only an excuse, so what's out here that Darrian would be interested in? Why send you out to the Free Marches? This area isn't under his command."

Nathaniel snuck a glance at the others, who quickly averted their eyes. Fenris picked at his nails while Varric whistled an all-too-innocent tune, and Garrett busied himself by simply drawing patterns in the dirt with the tip of his shoe.

Overall, quite the convincing performance.

Shifting his attention back to Anders, Nathaniel chewed on the inside of his cheek.

"Darrian asked that I come as a favor to him while he was stuck dealing with the nobility in Ferelden," he explained. "After your expedition, word quickly spread throughout the Grey Wardens' ranks. Darrian wanted to get ahead of this before too many people got involved, before the sites were trampled over in the Wardens' search for darkspawn and riches."

"What were you looking for, if not that?" Anders asked.

His answer knocked the air out of Anders, left him winded like a punch to the gut.

"A cure."

Anders dared not hope.

"A cure for the taint?" he questioned, needing to clarify for certain.

Nathaniel nodded.

"Did you find anything?" Garrett said, unable to contain his curiosity after such a revelation.

"Not a definite answer," Nathaniel told him, "but I have another lead at least."

Garrett couldn't hide his slight disappointment, mostly for Anders' sake, but then he perked up again. He smacked Varric on the shoulder.

"Hey! Didn't Merrill's mirror have the Blight? She cleansed it with blood magic, right?" At the scrunched-up looks on Anders' and Fenris' faces, Garrett snapped his mouth shut. "Just a thought!"

"One that is worth further investigation at the very least, even if nothing comes of it," Nathaniel agreed. "Perhaps I should meet with your friend, though, this Merrill."

"Such mighty heroes of legend, willing to resort to blood magic so easily," Fenris said, the sarcasm almost palpable in his voice.

"We are no heroes," Nathaniel replied, "yet our Order has saved the world many times over, having committed much worse acts than a bit of blood magic in the name of the greater good. Keep that in mind before you judge us."

That being said, he presented an offer to Anders, a futile one, but he wanted to extend it nonetheless.

His expression softened, watching him tenderly.

"We could always use the extra hands, if you're ever interested."

"So could I," Anders countered. "Nathaniel, I can only fight one battle at a time, and the mages here need my help."

"Huh. Interesting."

"What?"

"You never used to be all that interested in the mages' struggles before. What changed?"

"You mean he wasn't always like this?" Fenris muttered to Varric.

"Hard to imagine," Varric said, incredulous.

Anders scowled at them both. 

"Believe it or not, but I did always care in a way, no matter what was said in the past," he explained to all of them. "The thing was, I was powerless on my own. I didn't know where to even start. It was so much easier to turn a blind eye and look out for myself as I always did. It was easier to convince myself that I didn't care than it was to give a shit. It's not easy to have to fight tooth and nail every day to even dream about making a dent in our current system, let alone make the drastic changes that I and so many others envision."

Anders took a deep breath. Already, he could feel Justice simmering at the surface of his skin. His presence made his teeth tingle, but he wasn't ready to have that particular conversation with Nathaniel just yet.

For now, they reined themselves in.

"So, yeah," Anders stated, "a lot has changed."

"That, it has," Nathaniel said, "but my offer remains open." He paused, hesitant, wistful almost. "I don't begrudge you the life that you have built here. I merely wish that things could have been different."

The tension thickened around them, so much so that it clung to the air, but Garrett was optimistic. He wanted to reach out to them both, to bridge the sudden gap left between them.

“Well, surely you don’t have to leave so soon, do you, Nathaniel?” Garrett asked. He approached him, stepping between him and Anders, his hands on his hips with a playful smirk. “Why not stay and catch up? Preferably with less friction, of course.”

Surprised by the offer, Nathaniel blinked owlishly at him.

“I don’t know…” He trailed off, casting a glance in Anders’ direction, uncertain. “I wouldn’t wish to intrude.”

“Nonsense!” Garrett exclaimed. “Besides, you can’t just leave without having a Wicked Grace night at The Hanged Man. It’s the crown jewel of Kirkwall!”

“You don’t say,” Nathaniel hummed.

Of course, Nathaniel had been to Kirkwall before, The Hanged Man included, but he didn't want to dampen Garrett’s mood, his excitement contagious.

“I’m, uh, pretty sure that he’s busy, love,” Anders chided.

“Not too busy,” Nathaniel assured him. “After I send off my reports, all I had planned was to meet up with Sigrun in the Deep Roads.”

“You know, you could always talk to Daisy at The Hanged Man later as well,” Varric suggested.

“Daisy?”

“Merrill,” Garrett clarified.

“Ah, okay.” After thinking it over, Nathaniel shifted in place. “If it’s alright with you, Anders.”

His response was instant, bordering on defensive.

“Yeah, of course, do what you want.” He snorted. “Why would it be a problem?”

“Beats me,” Fenris deadpanned, ignoring Anders’ glare.

“In that case,” Nathaniel said, “I could always make time for a round of drinks.”

“With that kind of talk, perhaps you’ve been spending too much time with Oghren," Anders teased.

"In spite of one's best efforts, that dwarf does tend to rub off on you in one way or another."

Garrett smiled.

"Shall we get going then?" he asked. He stopped to wrinkle his nose at the state of his armor, pinching at the fine leather. "I don't know about the rest of you, though, but I could use a bath —or seven— before we go to Wicked Grace night."

Fenris and Varric grimaced at the reminder.

"Yeah, I think I'll head to the mansion first when we get back, then meet the rest of you there," Fen agreed. "Blighted Deep Roads."

"I'll be scrubbing the stench out for weeks," Varric complained with a pout. "This is my favorite coat."

"Doesn't look much different than the others."

"Thanks for the support, Hawke. It means a lot."

"Always happy to be of service," he laughed. "Nathaniel! Feel free to come by our estate before we go." He emphasized the offer with a hand upon Anders' shoulder, giving it a pointed squeeze. "I'm sure we could find something your size in Anders' or even some of Carver's old clothes."

"Tempting as that is, I think I should really check in with Delilah first," he sighed. "She'll have some of my belongings with her, at least, but I'll definitely head your way before we set out to The Hanged Man."

"Sounds like a plan."

Fenris rolled his eyes at them while Varric shook his head in amusement, undoubtedly jotting down mental notes on how best to spin this scenario for his stories.

As they started on the trek back to Kirkwall, Anders tugged Garrett to his side with a hiss.

"I know what you're doing."

"What?" Garrett asked, feigning innocence. His eyes widened, but that goofy grin of his remained in place. "What am I supposedly doing?"

"You…" Anders huffed. "You're being all friendly and what-not with Nathaniel."

"Oh, that?" Garrett shrugged, but his expression quickly shifted to one of concern. "I mean, if you want me to stop, just say the word."

Good question. Did Anders want him to stop?

"No," he decided, "it's not that." He waved away any worries he might have. "Nate's a big boy. If he's not comfortable with anything you say or do, he'll tell you himself."

"Good to know," Garrett said, "but he's 'Nate' now, huh?"

"We've known each other for a while now," Anders grumbled. "What about it?"

"Nothing." Garrett slipped free from his grasp with a mischievous wink. "Nothing at all."

He strolled up to Nathaniel's side while they walked, Fenris on the other.

Varric settled for a slower pace instead, settling in next to Anders.

While Garrett and Fenris talked with Nathaniel about almost anything and everything —from his life in Ferelden to his time in the Free Marches to his service under the Warden-Commander— Varric struck up a conversation of his own with Anders. He discussed his latest ideas on how to strengthen the protection around the clinic, especially with the templars so active as of late.

Anders nodded here and there, made the occasional noise of agreement, but the majority of his attention was devoted to watching the others, Garrett and Nathaniel specifically.

He simply couldn't look away.

The way they joked and laughed together was a sight to behold, Garrett being the more open and expressive of the two while Nathaniel relied upon his sarcasm and wit.

It didn't help that Garrett was so free with his affection and interest. He definitely cut back on flirting with others since he and Anders entered into a relationship, understandably so, but there was no denying how his body kept gravitating towards Nathaniel while they walked, how he shifted much closer than the careful distance that Fenris kept. Touches and glimpses alike lingered, but Anders found it even more fascinating when Nathaniel started to return that attention in kind.

Unlike the times when others amongst their inner circle made advances towards Garrett, Anders didn't feel that sharp, burning spike of jealousy rear its ugly head again.

No, instead, he felt entranced.

Butterflies fluttered in his stomach. His heart raced. His pulse pounded.

Swallowing thickly, he felt Justice stir at the growing intensity of his emotions.

Varric snapped his fingers at him, startling Anders out of his sudden daze.

"Hey!" Varric said. "Are you even listening to me, Blondie?"

“Wha— Oh, yeah! Of course I was!”

“Uh-huh, sure…” Trailing off, Varric raised an eyebrow at him, unconvinced. “What was I just talking about then?”

“Er, stuff?”

“What sort of stuff?”

“The stuff you talk about when you’re Varric Tethras,” Anders said, “because I was definitely listening.”

“Hey, now, was that a joke? Not from our Anders, no. Someone alert the Chantry!”

“Let’s not and say we did.”

Varric hummed in contemplation, following his earlier line of sight with ease.

“Taking in the view?” he asked. Nodding ahead at Hawke and company, he gave Anders a pointed nudge with his elbow. “Or are you concerned because your boyfriend and your ex are getting along so well?”

“Something like that.”

In all honesty, he was more so surprised by how much it didn’t bother him.

The rest of their return trip passed by with idle chatter, Anders deep in thought.

Once they arrived, everyone went their separate ways. Garrett and Anders made their way to the estate, hand-in-hand, their arms swinging slightly between them.

After greeting Bodahn and the others, they retreated to their room, where Garrett drew them a bath, heating it up to a steaming temperature with his magic. From there, they shed their clothes and set them aside to be cleaned later, the exhaustion from their journey finally catching up to them.

For a moment, they let all their worries fade away into the background.

They washed one another. Reverent touches lingered while they exchanged soft kisses here and there, smiling against each other’s lips. Their hands explored their bodies. Slowly but surely, they wiped away all the dirt and grime that remained until they both were clean.

Then, as they dried off, they whispered sweet nothings against each other’s skin, flushed with warmth.

Dressed in loose shirts and form-fitting pants, they finished getting ready for the evening ahead of them. Anders left his hair down without a care in the world, but he spent more than his fair share of time combing through Garrett’s thick curls for him. He parted his hair, section by section, and took great care when he encountered any particular tangles that made him wince.

Once Garrett was satisfied with the end result, he tied his hair back out of his face, huffing at the few stubborn strands that remained in his eyes.

Together, they trudged down the stairs and into the library.

They sat in front of the fire, leaning into each other’s side.

"You know," Garrett eventually said, "speaking with Nathaniel made me realize that you don't talk much about your time with the Wardens, even now."

Anders shrugged dismissively.

"There's not much to say, in all honesty," he sighed. In the distance, he could hear the front door open as Bodahn greeted their guest. "There were some good times in Amaranthine, I must admit, but we saw just as many unspeakable horrors during our stay there." Even now, he shuddered to think about it. To take his mind off of the memories, he leaned in to whisper to Garrett conspiratorially. "Plus, that Anders, let me tell you. I hear that he was quite an insufferable ass."

Garrett barked out a laugh at that, genuinely caught off guard.

"No, you don't say!" He gasped, then abruptly stopped, giving Anders a swift once-over. "Well, at least nothing has changed much in that regard." When Anders scowled at him, Garrett was quick to backtrack. "Kidding, kidding!"

Nathaniel laughed as he entered the room, attracting their attention.

"Heh, I see why you kept this one around, Anders. He's quite the jokester. Like a certain someone," he added, sitting next to them on the floor, his legs crossed out in front of him. "Unlike you, however, he's actually funny."

Garrett beamed at that, as if he received the highest praise imaginable.

"You hear that, my dear?" Garrett bragged. "Nathaniel thinks that I am funny."

"Yes, love," Anders said, "I heard. Although, I wish I hadn't. Your ego is already big enough without the extra encouragement."

When he pouted, Nathaniel grinned at them, leaning his weight back onto his hands.

Anders tried not to stare too much, but that was easier said than done. Gone were the dirt and carnage from their earlier ventures. Gone was the Grey Warden armor he once wore. In its place, he donned a dark blue shirt with a deep, plunging neckline, crafted from the finest silk. His chest hair was on display, the view tantalizing enough to give even Varric a run for his money. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing the musculature of his forearms, only a teasing glimpse of the full picture.

Black pants hugged the shape of his legs. Each shift caused the fabric to pull a little taut around his hips and thighs, the ends tucked neatly into a pair of leather boots.

Of course, if Anders was being even the slightest bit open about his appreciation, then that meant that Garrett was practically undressing Nathaniel with his eyes.

Not that Nathaniel did anything to discourage such attention, his expression smug, almost challenging as he met their eyes.

"So…" Nathaniel watched them both, lips parted. "You were talking about Amaranthine?"

Instantly, Garrett perked up, eager to know more.

"What was it like," he asked, "working with the Hero of Ferelden?"

"About as exciting as it would be to work with the Champion of Kirkwall on a daily basis, I'd imagine," Nathaniel answered. "And, from what I gathered, the crew you gathered around you is just as… unique as ours was back then."

"Yeah, that's an understatement," Anders snorted. "Although, speaking of…"

Garrett and Nathaniel glanced at him questioningly.

Despite his better judgment, he decided to ask anyway.

"How are they?"

Nathaniel thought that over for a moment, humming to himself in contemplation.

"Well, to start, I bet you'd love an update on the most important, littlest man in your life." At Anders' confused look, Nathaniel clarified. "Ser Pounce-a-lot is living a life of luxury, you know."

Oh, how Anders' heart absolutely melted at that news!

"His cat?" Garrett asked.

"The very one."

"He's still alive and kicking?" Anders laughed. "Not that I should have expected any less."

"Well, he's getting up in age; but, when Darrian heard the Wardens tried to take him away, he was upset to say the least. Brought him back to the royal palace, where his grandmother takes care of him. Last I heard, he lives the life of a spoiled mouser."

"Glad to hear it," Anders whispered, his body light with relief, as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

"As for our dearest Commander, well, I told you quite a bit already." Nathaniel shrugged. "King of Ferelden is the most recent update. Searching for a cure. Although, if you're more interested in the mage side of things, I hear that he and King Alistair have secured the Circle's independence in Ferelden. Apparently, they're working on implementing a different system instead."

"The College of Enchanters," Garrett whispered, and Anders hated it, how they felt the need to hide this, even in their own home. "My father had contacts in the Mages' Collective there that I still maintain. They hope that The College will serve as a template for other nations, that it'll be the first of its kind."

Anders could see how Garrett fidgeted with his hands, how he struggled to contain himself, how his dark brown eyes lit up in excitement.

"They say that they're offering refuge to apostates fleeing the Circle as well, those from Circles outside of Ferelden."

"The Mage Underground has actually confirmed that rumor," Anders stated. "They issued a royal decree stating that they will 'uphold the personal freedoms of any apostate seeking sanctuary in Ferelden, unless their presence is deemed a direct, unprovoked threat to the lives of others.' They're also refusing to aid the templars in any current hunts for mages at the moment."

"Interesting times that we live in," Nathaniel said. "It certainly won't win Darrian any points with the more Chantry-centric nobles still stuck in their ways, but I trust that he can handle it."

"If anyone could do it, it's him," Anders agreed. "But what about the others?"

"Ah, yes. Them. Now, let me see, let me see," Nathaniel continued, deep in thought. "Oghren is still Oghren, still a little smelly—"

"A little?" Anders interrupted, but Nathaniel kept on going as if he didn't even hear him.

"—still drinking his days away, but he has been more involved with his family, so I'll give him that. Velanna is, well…" Nathaniel grimaced. "She's still missing. No body was ever found in the Keep after the battle all those years ago. Darrian seems convinced that she somehow escaped and that she went into the Deep Roads to find her sister."

"I might not know this Velanna personally, but if it meant getting my sister back, I know that I would brave the Deep Roads and so much more for the chance," Garrett said, wistful.

"Had it been my sister, I wouldn't have hesitated," Nathaniel agreed, then cleared his throat. "Right, so Sigrun then? She's as cheerful as always. She's been leading multiple expeditions into the Deep Roads, sometimes for the Wardens, sometimes for the Legion, or even a mixture of both from time to time. Every now and then, she'll return to the Keep, but she keeps herself plenty busy, so she usually doesn't stay too long."

Nathaniel stared off into the flames of the crackling fire nearby, and that was when Anders suddenly realized that there was one last person for Nate to mention, a sinking feeling settling hard in his stomach like a rock.

"As for Justice, I don't know." Nathaniel rubbed at the back of his neck. "We heard from Aura that Kristoff's body was returned to her."

Anders stiffened at the all-too-familiar names, an echo of sorrow lingering from memories that were both his yet somehow not as well. A dizzying sensation followed, his head spinning as it struggled to keep up.

Confused, Garrett furrowed his brow at them, glancing between the two.

"Other than that?" Nathaniel shrugged. "Beats me. Maybe he returned to the Fade."

"To the Fade…?" Garrett narrowed his eyes at him, but Anders didn't get a chance to stop him before he rambled on. "You do mean our Justice, right? The one currently possessi—" Realization dawned on him then. "Wait, you don't know?"

With a groan, Anders dragged his hand down his face. He could already feel a headache coming on, a dull pain slowly spreading at his temple.

"Way to go, love," he praised, sarcasm thick in his voice. "Very smooth delivery there, I must say."

"Well," Garrett huffed, "how was I supposed to know that you didn't tell him?"

"Didn't tell me what, exactly?" Nathaniel asked, staring them down. "Anders, what is he talking about?"

Going back and forth on how to put it, Anders eventually decided that the time for subtlety was long gone.

With a deep, bracing breath, he closed his eyes and blurted out, "Justice and I are one!"

He peeked an eye open when Nathaniel didn't respond at first, the latter opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water, struggling to find the right words.

"Okay," he eventually said, slow and even. "I think I'll need you to clarify on that one for me."

"Ugh." Anders ran his fingers through his hair, sank his teeth into his bottom lip before releasing it. "I am his living vessel, and he is currently possessing me, for lack of better words."

"You're doing great," Garrett told him. Anders wrinkled his nose at him.

After a moment, Nathaniel sat up a bit straighter, giving Anders his full attention.

"Would it be too much to ask how this happened?"

No, it wouldn't be, but it took Anders several minutes to sift through two sets of memories, recollections of the same events but viewed from different angles.

Eventually, he spoke.

"It started when Darrian began to venture out more on his own. Not that I blame him for what happened, but he was the force keeping everything in order at the Keep. You, Sigrun, and Oghren were in the Deep Roads at the time, I believe. I stayed behind with Justice to help train some new recruits, mostly the mages, the younger ones who needed more guidance than most. I loved that."

Anders smiled.

"Back then, I always put on this air of indifference, but the truth was that I loved feeling like I was a part of something bigger, that I made a difference. Justice knew that." He laughed underneath his breath with a shake of his head. "He always did see right through me."

How quickly his smile fell, his jaw clenched tight.

"But without Darrian there to oversee matters personally, the Wardens became less selective in their recruitment process. They were simply trying to ride the wave of success after the Fifth Blight. Their goal was to recruit as many people as they could, as quickly as possible."

"Yeah, I remember," Nathaniel whispered. "When we returned, I remember thinking that a lot of those new recruits were definitely a handful."

And that was saying something, considering how he joined.

"That's putting it lightly," Anders grumbled. "Among the latest group at the time was Rolan, a former templar in name only." 

"He was still taking orders from them?" Garrett asked.

"I know for certain that he was. After all, it was quite the coincidence that Ser Rylock and the other templars who opposed my Conscription grew silent the second he showed up." Anders sneered. "He wasn't one of mine to train. He was more seasoned than most who joined, but he made it his sole purpose to watch my every move, to follow my every step. It didn't take long before his presence started to affect me, so Justice took to my side, day in and day out. He'd watch over me while I slept, chased Rolan off when he lingered. In that time, we talked more, grew closer…"

Anders swallowed thickly.

"He would talk me down when I panicked. He was there when the nightmares became more frequent, more intense." He refused to look at either of them for a moment, his gaze distant. "I wasn't taking care of myself, and Justice knew that I was about to make a run for it. Out of self-preservation, if nothing else. But Justice saw an opportunity for us both. We liked each other. We worked well together, and his days were numbered in Kristoff's body. He wouldn't hold on forever. He wouldn't put Aura through that."

Garrett took Anders' hand in his with a reassuring squeeze.

Blue light flooded through their veins. Web-like cracks split open their skin, their eyes glowing bright.

"We will never feel so powerless again," they stated. The power of the Fade resonated through their voice. "We swore then that we wouldn't stop until all mages live free of the fear and oppression they suffer under the Chantry's rule."

Nathaniel considered that, cautious to approach at first, but then he shifted closer.

He placed a hand upon their shoulder.

"Justice," he said, "what happened?"

"When I left Kristoff's body to join with Anders, Rolan rallied other templars and wardens against us. They called us an abomination, and then they attacked." They could recall each second with perfect clarity. "Being attacked so soon, when we had only just merged in such a way, made the transition messy."

They lifted up their shirt to reveal the large, jagged scar over their chest, its corresponding match on their back. 

"The templar tried to run us through. He did run us through, and so we tore his head clean from his body," they stated it so matter-of-factly, not even bothering to deny the horrors they inflicted during that first day together. "Everything was a blur. We wanted to make them pay for what they did to us. And by the time we regained our senses, we were all alone, surrounded by bodies torn to shreds, blood on our hands and our teeth."

Garrett brushed his fingers along the scar.

"That's how this happened," he murmured, right as Justice let the fabric fall back into place. "You never mentioned it, but I didn't want to pry either."

"We don't exactly have fond memories of being stabbed," Justice noted.

"I can't imagine why," Nathaniel said, but guilt ate at him, especially for his earlier words about Anders leaving. "I'm sorry that you had to go through that alone."

"We weren't alone," Justice assured him.

"You know what I mean."

"Nathaniel." Reaching out, they rested their hand upon his, their touch gentle. "Things might not be perfect now, but Anders and I made it through the worst by relying on each other. We didn't know at the time whether or not we could even control ourselves. We didn't want to risk you or the others, so we left. We didn't leave because of you, though."

Nathaniel sighed.

"Well, that's a relief, at least."

Their light died down, Anders slowly regaining control.

"In our defense, this was all your idea," Anders told him. "You were the one to suggest that Justice look for a living host."

Nate blinked owlishly at him.

"You remember that conversation?" he asked, bewildered. "How does that work exactly? Are all of his memories yours and vice versa, or…?"

"Something like that." He repeated to Nathaniel an explanation similar to what he once told Hawke. "I can't really say where one of us starts and the other ends. There are times when I'm the one in control and others when it's mostly Justice, but we're both still there. I'm still me, but it's us now. It's like we're two people and one at the same time." With a resigned grumble, Anders gave a half-shrug. "It's hard to explain."

"So, when Justice was in Kristoff's body…" Nathaniel looked as if he would be sick. "You can remember that?"

"I can," he answered slowly, "but I would rather not think about it, if possible."

"Wait, wait, wait," Garrett said. "You're telling me that you have memories…" He gestured vaguely, overall speechless. "Of possessing a corpse?"

"Yes, now, can we please stop talking about this?"

Silently, Nathaniel and Garrett exchanged a pointed look.

"Are you, uh, okay?" Garrett asked.

"Not right now, I'm not. Not if you two keep pestering me about this."

"Are you okay, in general?" Nathaniel countered.

Anders opened his mouth, paused, then closed it.

"Believe it or not, I am," he admitted. "I mean, I have purpose here. Our friends feel like a sort of makeshift family at times, and I have a man that I love, who loves me in return. Life is good right now."

He didn't entertain thoughts of the future, not now, not when things were peaceful, if only for a moment.

Garrett beamed up at Anders, shifting closer to his side.

Their love for each other was so apparent that Nathaniel couldn't help but to smile just from watching them.

"Glad to know things are working out for you," Nate said, ruminating on his thoughts with a playful chuckle. "Although, it's nice to know that some things never change."

Anders stared at him in confusion.

"What does that mean?"

"It means that, after all these years, you're still sporting the whole feathered pauldron look with robes that scream 'I'm a rebel mage!' I'm surprised to see you in casual attire for once," Nathaniel teased. "Although, if not even a Spirit of Justice or living amongst the nobility could change your tastes in robes and armor, then I certainly have no hope."

"I— What's wrong with my robes?!"

"Nothing, if there is an actual benefit to wearing them."

Garrett snickered, so Anders turned his glare on him instead.

"Whose side are you even on?"

"The one that supports your individuality, of course," Garrett replied, not once missing a beat.

"Heh, good answer."

"You managed to charm me at least, feathers and all."

"Miracles never cease," Nathaniel deadpanned.

"Not that it matters anyhow," Anders muttered. Before he could stop himself, the words came spilling out of his mouth. "You've always been the type that cares more about how I look out of my robes than in them."

Both Garrett and Nathaniel tensed, and it took a solid minute for Anders' mind to catch up with what he said.

He instantly buried his face into his hands, his cheeks burning red with a growing blush.

"Can we forget I just said that?"

"Not a chance," Garrett chuckled. He leaned around Anders to quirk a brow up at Nathaniel. "Remind me, what was the extent of your relationship again?"

"I, uh—" Even Nathaniel grew uncharacteristically bashful at that, stumbling over his words, rubbing nervously at the back of his neck. "Well, you see…"

"Seriously?" Anders grumbled with a nudge to Garrett’s side.

"What? I'm just curious!"

"Yeah, and if I started asking about your past relationships?" Anders peeked at him between his fingers, eyes narrowed. "Fenris? Varric?"

Garrett lifted his head up in challenge, his smirk mischievous.

"Defensive much? I'm an open book," Garrett said. "Fenris left for his own reasons, so we simply didn't work out after the fact. Varric was a one night fling, and we were both well aware of that fact beforehand."

"Uh-huh." Anders hid his grin behind his hands. "What about Sebastian?"

"What about him?"

"Would you have slept with him too, if not for his vow of chastity?"

"Oh, no." Garrett shook his head. "No, no, no. Of course not." Then, he stopped to think it over. "Well, on second thought…"

"You're shameless!" Anders laughed.

"He definitely wants to fuck me, though," Garrett responded.

"He definitely does."

"His loss, though, but you're avoiding the question." Garrett poked Anders in the arm. "Nothing to be ashamed of, you two. At the end of the day, I love you and Justice, Anders. I'm committed to you, but I do want you to be as happy as possible, and if Nathaniel—"

"If you're asking if we slept together, then yes," Nathaniel cut in, tired of the back and forth.

Anders yelped, caught off guard, but Garrett choked on his words with a snort.

"I knew it!"

"Multiple times, actually."

"Nate!" Anders scolded, but even he couldn't hold back his wide, radiant grin.

"I mean, would you be interested in doing that again?" Eyeing Nathaniel up and down, Garrett even had the audacity to wink at him, sinking his teeth into his bottom lip. "I wouldn't mind if you joined us for a bit of fun. With Anders' permission, of course."

Wedged in between them, Anders was suddenly all too aware of the heat emanating from their bodies.

Nathaniel considered the offer, right before he pressed himself flush against Anders' side

"Well, what do you say, Anders?" He tucked blonde hair back behind his ear, whispering to him, breathless with an all-too-familiar desire. "For old times' sake?"

Flashes of memories sparked to life in the back of his mind. Stolen moments in the barracks at Vigil's Keep. Passionate nights spent upstairs in his very own bed. All of it came rushing back to him, all at once.

One thing about Justice, he was a bit of a romantic.

Experiencing echoes of love through Kristoff's memories was one thing, but experiencing the emotion firsthand through Anders was another feeling entirely. It was like comparing a candle's heat to the burn of a pyromancer's strongest spells, intense and all-consuming.

Safe to say, Anders was feeling a little overwhelmed on all ends.

In the blink of an eye, he was on his feet. 

A bright light shot through him, there and gone in an instant.

Facing Garrett and Nathaniel, he tugged at his collar with a sheepish grin, walking backwards out the door, only to bump into the frame.

"Well, would you look at that?! We're going to be late for Wicked Grace night if we don't hurry, and I, for one, can use a drink after the day I've had."

"That's not a 'no,'" Garrett noted, always the optimist.

"It's not," Anders agreed, "but I'm not answering either of you until I've played a round of cards, lost all my coin, and have some half-decent ale in my system."

With that, he left the room. Garrett and Nathaniel stood up to follow, dusting themselves off.

"I assume that means we'll resume this conversation later," Nathaniel said.

Garrett looped his arm through Nathaniel's, dragging him along with a joyous laugh.

"Definitely."

#dragon age #dragon age 2 #da2 #anders #garrett hawke #nathaniel howe #da justice #handers #nanders #nathanders #justice positive #custom hawke #bluerose writes #tw cannibalism #only because i included parts from anders' short story so 😅 #just to be on the safe side

[queenofzan]

Playersexuality

It is super annoying when people use the excuse of "playersexual" video game characters to claim characters in video games aren't actually bi/pan, because there is a difference, and it's honestly not that hard to distinguish them!

For an example of a game that is doing playersexual characters who are not textually bisexual, look at Stardew Valley. I love Stardew Valley, but the way it handles sexuality bugs the shit out of me, and always has. If you romance Abigail with a female farmer, she actually mentions having never felt this way about another girl before, so clearly she is not intended to be bisexual. One of the first male romances I did (Sebastian or Elliot?) had a similar line. If you romance Leah, the gender of her ex will always match the farmer's gender, implying that Leah is into that specific gender. (I actually don't mind the Leah implementation of a playersexual character nearly as much as I do the "no homo" in the Abigail romance.)

To contrast that, I think of Dragon Age 2, where all characters are romanceable by any gender Hawke, and they express attraction to a variety of other characters. Anders hits on Hawke the same way regardless of Hawke's gender, and his ex Karl is always a man, while he references having sexual experiences alongside Isabela. Isabela expresses attraction to women (and was willing to have sex with female Wardens in Dragon Age: Origins) as well as men, and will end up in a physical relationship with Fenris if neither character is romanced by Hawke. These feel less like playersexual characters and more like a group of bisexuals hanging out, whether or not that's improbable.

There is a clear difference between a history and textual attraction to multiple genders and the Schroedinger's Ex Leah has. Schroedinger's Ex is less jarring to a player than a line from a character who otherwise reads as queer to a player suddenly saying "I've never had a gay feeling before", but it almost can't be bisexual representation, whereas a character who "no homo"s the player character could reflect or change their mind, representing a more complicated sexuality journey that, while not a particularly common one outside of romance-focused games, is not inherently homo- or bi-phobic.

So seeing people (presumably monosexuals, although it is possible these are bisexuals with internalized shit to work through) look at textually bisexual characters and deride them as playersexual pandering is both confusing and upsetting. There is nothing in the text of, for instance, Baldur's Gate 3, that implies Astarion has any particular surprise or confusion about being attracted to a woman, but some fans will argue that he's too effete to be anything but gay. That's not a gay character turned playersexual for mechanical or marketing convenience, that's fans being homophobic, biphobic, and arguably misogynist and claiming it's the fault of the game developers.

As a gamer who tries to be thoughtfully critical of games, I do think playersexual romances make sense from a marketing and gameplay perspective. I think locking content behind genders or species is a silly thing to do, particularly in a large game that takes a long time to play and is not specifically designed to be played through multiple times like many visual novels and dating sims. I would not count those characters as meaningfully bi or pansexual, even if (as a greedy bisexual) I want to count them as such in my heart. If there's nothing in the text to contradict it, they would really be bi or pan only in headcanon. The playersexual approach of "they're straight except for the very special PC" is problematic, if understandable. It would be less obnoxious in a setting that isn't mired in heteronormativity, because then at least I could believe this is an individual having revelations and new experiences rather than a game dev assuming all people are heterosexual until proven otherwise.

As a bisexual who is very tired of being marginalized by monosexuals, especially queer monosexuals who should know better, I wish people would stop trying to sound progressive and supportive of bisexuals when they are actively erasing and denying the existence of textual bisexuality that they don't understand or which makes them confused or uncomfortable. Even when playersexuality is transparently the reason everyone in the game is bi or pan, singling out the most effeminate men or masculine women and claiming they're "really" monosexuals reveals that the problem is not, in fact, playersexuality, but bisexuality, because it's apparently fine for the straighter-seeming romance options to be bi, but somehow problematic for the obviously queer ones to be.

It's possible some people doing this legitimately think they're helping bisexuals. But critiquing playersexuality should not mean policing the way queer characters act. If the problem is really playersexuality, or the specific implementation of it, then say that, instead of making arguments that are indistinguishable from those a Fox News anchor would make.

#video games #bisexuality #playersexual #i don't mean to pick on concernedApe i'm just very familiar with the game and it's a good example #and notably not every romance does the no homo thing! which is cool! #but it makes the ones that do stand out

[lesetoilesfous]

CW: Non-graphic mention of sexual assault, rape and child sexual assault (because Circles)

Today’s haunting: Anders telling a male Hawke that Karl was his ‘first’ in the context of a high likelihood of sexual assault in his past, and possibly child sexual assault (his hypersexual behaviour as a symptom of abuse in awakening, unchecked trend of sexually predatory behaviour in Kinloch Hold, no privacy for mages in their bathing or sleeping chambers, he ran away and hid in a brothel where he met Isabela because he was having sex with clients - not staff, Cullen’s ‘crush’ on Surana / Amell, “everyone was kissing everyone”)

So I feel like that indicates the probability of one of two things:

- He went to Karl first, young, because he wanted to make sure his first experience was a kind one

- He decided everyone / everything else before Karl didn’t count

Either way it’s making me feel something

#Karl Thekla #Anders da2 #da2 #kanders #dead dove do not eat

[salsedine]

Per l'ask game propongo Solas e Anders di Dragon Age

Ps ho schiacciato sul blog sbagliato e ho mandato un ask per sbaglio all'op voglio morire

Hello e grazie mille per l'ask! Credo che l'op non se la prenderà, ci sono ask decisamente peggiori in questi lidi 🙈 E se può consolare, una volta Tumblr ha glitchato di brutto inviando un mio messaggio critico verso uno show molto popolare ad un blog iper fan del suddetto show. Capisco l'ansia!

Daje now we'll switch to badly written English.

Solas: I wish I could say something, but I still haven't played DAI 🙈 (and i don't even know if I'll be able to without melting my laptop). However, from posts and fanarts I deduced that he is some kind of old god/trickster archetype/the dreadwolf thingy that wants to destroy the world. Interesting!

And a fun fact. For... quite some time I used to think that Solavellan was the name of an actual character. In my defence, it sounds legit for a fantasy setting.

Now, let's move on to the character that will make people stop talking to me lol. Under the read more because I'm on mobile and have no idea how long this is going to be.

* First impression: hello fun guy that hates the chantry and is obsessed with cats, I like your earring! Oh you refused to speak and ran away multiple times so... they left you a year in solitary confinement?? Oh and then your ex/first love is illegally magically lobotomized as a threat against you? WTF WTF WTF.

* Impression now: I pretty much like all the characters, but he really grew on me. I find him very interesting and compelling, BUT I also want to hit him with a brick for every bitchy/condescending/hypocrite comment towards Fenris or Merrill. I also suspect that with him the writers tried to portray mental illness or something similar? I think I read something somewhere.

* Unpopular opinionS: ehhh, here we go. It's called "the last straw" and not "I'm going to commit a political assassination at the first inconvenience" for a reason. I agree that it could have been handled differently (with more time- this game definitely deserved more development time), but it wasn't on a whim, nor I see it as some grand machination that he planned for years. It's a very desperate act that was preceded by years of activism and trying to find a compromise. A compromise that it is impossible to reach, imho, because compromises in order to work need good faith and/or some kind of leverage. Mages have no leverage and Meredith (and Elthina too) have no good faith. Meredith explicitly wanted an excuse to kill them all, and the right of annulment has been sent for... how can you compromise with someone that considers your existence a mistake to correct? I can see that it's a political situation that would have required more nuance than what the game had time to provide - but overall I think it's pretty clear why he did it.

* Favourite moment: The "hello Varric, take my mother's embroidered pillow, just in case something happens ahah I'm so subtle" scene is quite sweet (despite everything that follows), and while I affectionately mock it for being very loud, the First Big Kiss in the sewers is a classic. And any mention to cats is very much appreciated, obviously.

* Idea for a story: the 3 years gap between the acts are full of possibilities, and I love missing-moments stories. Also! If the "something here is a metaphor for mental illness" idea is true I'd definitely love to read some in-depth exploration of it.

* Favourite head canon: considering what I saw from the official writers about him after the events of DA2, I'd just say "the opposite of that".

* Favourite relationship: platonic, I'd say Varric ("let's brainstorm how to kill my brother :D! Also I'm paying criminals to stay away from your underground free clinic, bye"). Romantic, definitely Hawke. But with a disclaimer: I've tried the romance path thingy with a male rogue/archer Hawke (after much consideration, I was really curious about Fenris and Isabela too, but the "ten years, a hundred years-" quote got me) but I still haven't finished it. So yeah, I'm aware I'm missing pieces here -and this is why I looked for all the spoilers. "And I love you so much I'm going to let you kill me" indeed, mrs Welch singing during the end credits, indeed.

Thanks again for asking! 💃✨

[edit] finished the game - he is now in the top 10 of my favourite characters, huge fan of the romance with Hawke (friendship route and 'let's run away' ending).

#like hell I'm tagging this #ask #anders positive #i guess that's the tag

[perilegs]

what i find really interesting is how none of the bisexual characters are "playersexual" in da:o. they have their bisexuality present in the game no matter your character's gender. when romanced, zevran will always openly talk about being attracted to men and women, leliana can tell you about marjolaine being her lover

however, when we get to da2, it changes a bit. isabela can be made to tell about her ex-husband, but anders only mentions his past with karl if you play as a male hawke. isabela and fenris can hook up, if neither are romanced, but isabela and merrill will never do that

#ive played inquisition twice and havent even touched trespasser so i cant remember how bisexual characters are treated there #dragon age #feel free to expand on this this is just the start of a thought process

[ao3feed-fenders]

The Wrong Side of Paradise

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/PC5qe6l

by Fthechantry

Anders is struggling with a bipolar episode. Fenris is on the receiving end of his rage and is processing his own trauma from his past with Danarius. Fenris decides to work on his car to process the argument that he and Anders had, but finds that he forgot his car jack at work. He texts Hawke for a ride to get it and discuss what happened earlier that day. He comes home later on and has a conversation with Anders about how he can help him.

Words: 4551, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Anders (Dragon Age), Male Hawke (Dragon Age), Fenris (Dragon Age), Ser Pounce-a-Lot (Dragon Age)

Relationships: Anders/Fenris (Dragon Age), Fenris & Male Hawke (Dragon Age), Anders & Ser Pounce-a-Lot (Dragon Age)

Additional Tags: Bipolar Anders (Dragon Age), Modern AU, Anders and Fenris are married, Mentall Illness, Bipolar Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicidal Thoughts, mentioned in passing - Freeform, not that huge within the fic, Anxiety, Fenris is worried about Anders, Hawke is a stoner, Elfroot as a Recreational Drug (Dragon Age), Anders knows he's a mess, Fenris is a supportive partner

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/PC5qe6l

#ao3feed #fanfic #fenders #Anders #Fenris

[giantsreach]

❛  𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐃 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 — i am so much more than i was. this is what i was meant to be. ❜

𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐖𝐊𝐄. he had a stare like a templar, drive like a warden, and more skill than sense. and i’ll not say a bad word more than that, because i'm still here and ruddy kings aren't. — and that's because of men like him trying.

⌈ about … full dossier … rules below ⌋

o1. this is an indie, selective, and 18+ carver hawke ( dragon age 2 ) roleplay blog. interactions will be solely for people i am in mutual follows with. i will not be following non-rp blogs or blogs without some form of rules, nor will i interact with gender bends/cis swaps or duplicate muses. i'm unfortunately very opinionated about carver and i'd hate to nitpick another person's interpretation.

o2. before he is hawke’s brother, carver is his own character. i usually follow the decisions i choose for carver. within my main verse, carver is a warden on the friendship route; his templar verse is to be used at my discretion.* 

( *templar muses may assume carver’s templar verse as the default for ease of interaction. ) 

o3. please do not use super small text with me. my eyes are bad with a real gnarly astigmatism. on that note, i know it's extremely popular right now, but i'm not interested in writing with those double- or triple- spacing their posts. i struggle to read it and won't force myself through trying.

o4. if you ask for a starter and i write one for you, please like the post so that i know you’ve seen it. if you don’t, i’ll probably send it to you via im, you’ll say you saw it, i’ll mention my rules and just generally have a lowered opinion of you. same goes for ask memes.

i don’t really care about reblog karma. send memes only if you want replies. i’d rather not waste my time because the common convention is that it’s polite to leave something in someone’s ask box before you reblog. 

o5.  tag your nsfw, ooc, and vagueblogging. don’t follow otherwise. 

i’m a qmoc who’s been in darp for years and i know how this fandom gets about its white male faves and white elves and white mages. uwu i’m tired of white roleplayers co-opting radical language to post uninformed cold takes for a fandom which revolves around some eurocentric fantasyland written largely by and for white audiences. 

tl;dr if you’ve got #magerights in your about but hate vivienne, don’t follow me.

o6.  i am non-exclusive and tentatively multi-ship, but i will likely only with one of any character and prefer mutual ship exclusivity.

more information on ships/shipping here!

o7. if you have triggers that should be tagged, please let me know. the tagging system on this blog boils down to subject tw / cw. i tag the essentials such as nsfw, gore, death, etc. as they occur, if they do at all. 

o8. thank you for making it through my rules! i’m thomas ( he/him/his ) and i’m really not that much of a stickler, i promise. i’m twenty-seven, engaged, and operating as a legal assistant by day, no-skill gamer by night. i pull some wacky hours, so expect low activity.

 ⋙      𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬.

on warden carver vs templar carver.

on malcolm’s absence in carver’s life.

on carver and his views on mortality.

on carver’s mundane aspects.

on carver’s attitude towards the templars, especially in act i.

on carver’s dislike of anders. 

on carver’s attempts at befriending fenris.

on the potential carver and merrill had.

#( pinned post. ) #( not for rbing etc. ) #dragon age rp #da rp #bioware rp #( <- adds that bc i can't be assed to make a promo however. ) #skyrim rp #tes rp

[meowmeowmage]

Sticking to the Anders/Male Hawke/Justice tag tends to be a pretty good way to dodge the unpleasant things you mentioned. Much less selection, of course, and it doesn't really solve that most things are still awful but. Good filter for a better experience, imo.

Yeah I've gone through that filter and you're absolutely right - there are less nasty surprises there for sure. But a lot of the time I just want handers instead of justhanders so I have to get out of this semi-safe zone

#asks

[stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage]

Hey so you've posted a bit about replaying DA and I wanted to know if you have a canon run through

I do! I'm currently replaying through my canon run right now [with a few deviations here and there] because every time I finish a run, some time passes before I'm like, ".........I miss them." It makes doing an alternate run harder, too.

For DAO, I play as a rogue lady Tabris named Rosalie, or Rose. Dual-wielding ranger and dualist. Her most used party dynamic is Alistair/Morrigan/Zevran. She named the mabari Griffon after the tales of Grey Wardens and their griffons. Rose romanced Alistair, kept him a warden and made Anora queen. She considers Morrigan one of her closest friends until Morrigan reveals her true intentions for coming with them. I've written about that whole thing before. Honestly, as far as companions go, Rose becomes close friends with most of them... except Wynne, they tend to butt heads in a lot of ways.

Rose didn't want to become a warden and thinks most of their rules and secrets are bullshit. Duncan's excuse for not coming to help her and the other elven women Vaughan took is a driving force for her to defy that "we can't get involved" rule as much as she can during and post-blight. She sided with the mages in Kinloch and with their help saved Connor, made Bhelen king of Orzammar, and settled things between the Dalish and the werewolves peacefully by convincing Zathrian to end the curse. She executed Loghain at the Landsmeet since, y'know... he sold city elves, nearly including her father, to Tevinter slavers to fund his war so... in her eyes, he doesn't get to live after that.

This playthrough I did make a save to reject Morrigan's dark ritual to see what happens when the warden makes the ultimate sacrifice and it's the most unsatisfying ending. It's such a, "No no noooo we didn't deserve this! After everything we went through! Just for it to end like that??" hopeless feeling... which was then fixed when I went back and made my canon choice of begrudgingly accepting the deal [even though it mostly goes against Rose's character but I'm weak and selfish and want her and Alistair to live].

In DA2, I play as a male mage Hawke named Edgar, or Ed. Force mage and blood mage. His most used party dynamic is Carver/Merrill/Anders until Carver goes to the Grey Wardens, then it's Isabela/Merrill/Anders. He's mostly purple in personality, but occasionally dips into blue, and I can count the number of times he's gone red on one hand. He named his mabari Fleabag after Malcolm bought the pup from a traveling merchant who failed to mention he was flea ridden. Several baths later, the mabari was finally flea free but Ed decided he should never live it down and named him Fleabag.

Ed maxes out the friendships with everyone [yes, including Carver, Ed tries so damn hard with him] except Aveline, he maxes out her rivalry. They all side with him and the mages in the end. He romanced Anders. I once did a run where I romanced Fenris with Ed and even though I liked it, the whole playthrough felt wrong because romancing Anders is, like... a fundamental part of Ed's story now... Even though they break up in the end.

I've done all three options across different playthroughs when it comes to Anders; I've spared him, I've killed him, and I've told him to leave. My canon choice is to tell him to leave, and then let him join my party later after we've sided with the mages. It's hard to explain without writing a full essay, but Ed and Anders are pretty much life partners at this point. Even if it's no longer romantic because a huge amount of trust was broken, even if they never get back together in that regard, even if Anders will now be on the run for the rest of his life, whether or not Ed agrees with him [he does and he doesn't, it's complicated] like... Ed loves him and he'll always love him, y'know? He won't abandon him even when everyone tells him he should.....but then DAI happened uhhh

Finally for DAI, I play a lady mage Lavellan named Ashalle, or Ashlaen, or just Ash. She's a knight-enchanter who mostly does storm magic. I'd say DAI is the game where I have a pretty even party use that I rotate between; Cassandra/Varric/Vivienne, Solas/Sera/Blackwall, The Iron Bull/Dorian/Cole. She sides with the mages in Redcliffe and left Hawke in the fade [sorry Ed, and sorry Anders... and sorry Carver... and Varric]. When it came to picking a ruler for Orlais, she figured all options sucked but went with Celene and Briala. Ash drank from the well, and then disbanded the inquisition in Trespasser.

I dislike how DAI just kinda plops your inquisitor into existence with only a small paragraph explaining why they were at the conclave; I wish it had a DAO approach so that's what I did for my inquisitor. Before I start the DAI playthrough, I boot up DAO. Before she was Ashalle Lavellan, she was a circle mage named Ashlaen Surana who escaped with Jowan after he lied to her about being a blood mage. In the ten years pre-DAI, she lost Jowan. In her grief, joined the Dalish, changed her name, and eventually ended up at the conclave. It just adds a lot more meat and spice to the choices and interactions with companions and advisors since she keeps that part of her backstory a secret. After all, she helped a blood mage and then was accused of being one herself before fleeing; she doesn't want the inquisition to know that. All of her crafted staves are named after Jowan while her crafted robes are usually named after her conflicting identities and pieces of her past, too..... Oh, speaking of past, she romanced Cullen. Because of course.

With the context of all this, it becomes them reuniting after they may or may not have had a thing going on in the circle, but then she escaped and he believed she was actually a blood mage for ten years. Cullen sees her like "Ah. Yes. You. Whom I haven't met. Hope they're right about you. We've lost a lot of people to get you here. Glad you survived." when internally he's screaming "I know who you are, those tattoos fool me not! Why are you here?? To torment ME specifically??" Then there's Ash who takes a little longer to recognize him, and when she does, it solidifies that she needs to run after this because he knows who she is and why she fled, that's not good, she's not going back to the circle after all this is done.

But y'know... they work it out. Eventually.

That's my canon run through of all three games. I keep trying to talk myself into doing a full alternate canon run, but the only game I've successfully done a different route in is DAI with my male rogue Tristan Trevelyan whose backstory was that he's a pro-mage ex-templar. That was fun to see how different things play out, but I haven't managed it for the other two.

I'd like to play DAO as a more cutthroat warden who, unlike Rose, won't go out of their way to do kind things; they'll do what they deem necessary. I'd like to do a lady warrior Hawke run with Bethany as the surviving sibling, and I've tried before but every time I hit a point where I'm like ".....I miss Carver so much" and abandon the run. Like there's always something that makes me abandon the run. I almost abandoned Tristan's run, too, but somehow I pushed through and got invested. I dunno. One day I'll put on my big girl pants and just do it.

#asks #dragon age #dao #da2 #dai #this is the first ask i've ever gotten on this blog btw you get a gold star for being first anon ⭐ #actually that's technically not true- the first ask was a bot telling me there are single ladies in my area but i was not interested #but thank you for giving me the opportunity to gush a little bit about my da protags; they're funky and i love them #i've mostly talked about dao and da2 on this blog but i'd like to talk more about dai at some point #tbh i think i'm hesitant because cullen's my canon romance and i've read a lot of discourse in his tag from fans who hate him #and i'm like mmmmmmm maybe i should just *not* sksksks #like i dunno i don't believe in assuming people are bad just because they picked an option i don't like #mostly it depends on how they treat other people or if their reasonings are actually harmful that determine it for me y'know? #i enjoy reading different opinions on characters and choices because different perspectives are fun and can make you see things #in a different light. like if i say 'huh yeah okay i never thought of it that way that's neat' then you've done something right imo #but dai makes me hesitate in a way that dao and da2 don't so i don't know what that's about haha #but anyway yeah i love every excuse to talk about da ❤️ #long post

[sweetmage]

SebastianxBethany -or- CarverxMerrill

Hi! Sorry for the late response! Well, late for me anyway, I guess it's still the same day😅

For Seb/Bethany... I don't actually ship this personally. I would try to answer the questions anyway for fun, but unfortunately I don't know Bethany very well/have never seen them together other than skimming their banters on the wiki so I don't think I can't add much😅No shame to them at all though, I have seen some of their banters and they definitely got some little thang going on!!! As for Merrill/Carver... I like them a lot 😌

when I started shipping it if I did: This was my first DA2 ship. I was sad when Carver left (and even sadder that he became a templar in my playthrough, like come on...), I wanted to see more of him and Merrill!!!!

my thoughts: I think they are very awkward and cute, love how flustered he gets around her. It's also really sweet to see the softer side of him.

What makes me happy about them: Same as above! Also height difference. They're also just very funny, I loved that she thought everything he said was an innuendo when he was being more wholesome than Hawke could ever hope to be when flirting with her. She also doesn't pick on him or antagonize him the way the other characters seem to!

What makes me sad about them: They get separated from each other no matter what (wardens, templars, or death), but I would imagine him becoming a templar in my playthrough kinda puts a huge wedge in things, I don't really see them coming back from that tbh 😅 Though perhaps there is something juicy in the heartbreak/betrayal of it ending in that way. And Warden Carver is a whole other can of worms...

things done in fanfic that annoys me: I have never read a fanfic about them. However, I do not like when any fic infantilizes Merrill or has a non-mage step in to save the day because she "doesn't know what she's doing" or whatever so I would dislike that here too.

things I look for in fanfic: I think I'd only prefer to read fluffy things about them, personally. Especially her worrying over a warden Carver, especially in a canon where one of her clanmates became the HoF so she'd have that personal experience to strengthen her concern for him. Not to mention the general issues with maintaining a relationship while being a warden, etc. I'd love to see them navigate that. I'm sure there's a million fics about that, I just don't read fics often so I'll have to look some other time😅

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: I also ship Carver with an unnamed male warden I just mentioned offhand in a fic once and I ship Merrill with Isabela, my m!blood mage Hawke, sometimes with my dalish circle mage/blood mage El'la as a QPP. I also sometimes ship her in an OT3 with Tamlen (who survived) and my dalish warden Savil. I also love her having some sorta deep platonic thing going on with my canon Hawke and Anders post-canon. Same with her and Sebastian being deeply close besties. (Merrill is my favorite DA character so I think about her with everyone, she has such good chemistry with so many people)

My happily ever after for them: I think it might be asking a lot for them to ever have a normal, quiet life but I'd at least like them write to each other frequently and find times to meet whenever they can, even if only just to chat and steal a smooch for a few minutes as he's passing through.

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Carver as the little spoon is funny to me because he is so Large so I am kinda digging it. There is also something cute about the safety and security of being wrapped comfortably in her arms after many months away experiencing The Horrors. Not to mention post-nightmare too. He seems to take the whole Warden thing really well, but I can't imagine it isn't at least somewhat taxing.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Just catching up and sharing funny anecdotes, exchanging gifts perhaps. When they live such different lives that don't allow for much normalcy I could imagine it might be nice just to relax and enjoy each other's company peacefully for a while 💗

#hoo hoo hoo you reignited my feelings about them!!!!!!!! #jun answers

[syrupwit]

Letter for Secret Sanders Holiday Exchange 2022

-

Hello there, and welcome to my letter for Secret Sanders Holiday Exchange 2022! I appreciate that you’ve taken the time to read this letter. I hope that it will provide you with clarification, inspiration, or whatever else you may happen to be seeking from it.

Although I’ve written more for some sections in this letter and less for others, rest assured I would be thrilled to receive a gift for any of the requested romantic or platonic ships. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out through the mods.

Regarding my canon knowledge: I have played all or most of Origins, Awakening, and DA2. I’ve played some Inquisition, but haven’t gotten far. I am not familiar with any of the books, novels, or comics, though I am perfectly capable of consulting the wiki.

Regarding PCs for this fandom: My personal Wardens are all female with default names, my personal Hawke is default purple Hawke of any class or gender, and I haven’t played enough Inquisition to develop a preferred Inquisitor. However, I have no preferences when it comes to PCs in gift works. Go wild!

Please see the table of contents below:

Do Not Want (DNW)

General Likes

Art Likes

Smut Likes

Anders/Jowan | Anders & Jowan

Anders/Justice

Anders/Merrill | Anders & Merrill

Anders/Carver Hawke/Merrill

Anders/Male Hawke/Merrill

Anders/Sigrun | Anders & Sigrun

Anders/Fenris

Anders/Fenris/Sebastian Vael

-

DO NOT WANT (DNW)

Character bashing (it’s fine if any character plays the villain role -- any! genuinely! -- but I enjoy works that focus more on requested characters being interesting or loveable or in a position of suffering, not on another character being especially hateful and hated)

Characters depicted as under age 18 involved in sexual situations

Characters having sex without mutual sexual attraction (I enjoy G- and T-rated shipfic and would be fine with sex not being mentioned at all, but for works featuring sexual content, I don’t want it to be explicitly stated that the characters are not attracted to each other)

Real-life hate speech

Explicit, onscreen harm to children (current bad environment or discussions of past child abuse are fine)

Harm to pet animals (the existence of ghost pets is fine)

Bestiality

Scat

Necrophilia (EXCEPTION TO THIS DNW: Anders/Justice when Justice is in Kristoff’s body is fine; no graphic depictions of decay/rotting, please, but feel free to get weird with it)

-

GENERAL LIKES

Absurd, silly, situation-based, or dark humor

Surreality, weirdness, ridiculous premises treated seriously

Gratuitous depictions of scenery, food, clothing, ancient cursed objects, etc.

Stories within a story, in-universe media, codex entries

Banter and arguments

Characters teaming up to accomplish something; sense of community among an ensemble, especially if it persists despite tensions, hurts, and differences that are not neatly resolved

Enemies, frenemies, or strangers having to work together to get through a situation

Dramatic rescues

Hurt/comfort

The “crouching fool, hidden badass” trope

Unreliable narrators, especially if they’re experiencing cognitive dissonance or trying to justify something horrible to themselves (something horrible that they’re doing or that someone else is doing to/near them)

Unresolved tension and ambiguous relationships

Shipfic: get togethers, first times, FWB to lovers, pining, insecurity, jealousy, messy love triangles, fake/pretend relationships, UST, silly romantic comedy tropes

-

ART LIKES

Limited color palettes -- or super bright ones!

Black and white, severe lighting, darkness -- art that makes you go, “is this a screenshot from a noir film?”

Sense of movement

Dramatic moments

Pretty clothes, food, nature 

Fairy tale elements

Modern or specific AU versions of the characters (ex. “Here they are if they were all from ancient Tevinter! Here they are as crust punks. Here they are as early 20th century Parisian lesbians -- yes, all of them. Here they are in Ancient Crete. Here they are as cyber-werewolf bikers in space.”)

-

SMUT LIKES

Characters being super into each other, especially if they’re not conventionally attractive 

Emotionally intense or significant sex scenes

Awkwardness, repression, insecurity; characters who don’t really know what they want, but sure are getting something

Characters who might be experienced with sex, but are not experienced with Feelings, and oh no they’re completely out of their depth now

UST that doesn’t get acknowledged or named until it boils over

“Chicken,” denial, teasing; one character flirting just enough for plausible deniability and the other not believing that they could be serious; one character hurting the other, purposefully or unwittingly, when they take the teasing too far

Jealousy, especially if the jealous character is guilty or in denial about their feelings

Sex pollen/mating cycles/in heat

Xeno

Male characters being submissive

-

Anders/Jowan | Anders & Jowan

Mage Friends Your PC Can Execute, x2! I’d just like to see these two interacting. They’re in the same place at the same time, with some views in sympathy, although of course they differ on the issue of blood magic.

Did Jowan idolize Anders in the Circle, or maybe not? What if they escaped together once, or Jowan tried to escape with Anders or aided or hindered him in some way during one of his escape attempts? Or perhaps they successfully escape together in an AU, or meet in some possible timeline after the Warden has set Jowan free? I would love just about any scenario! 

-

Anders/Justice

This is one of my favorite ships in all of DA, and I want every take on it, from tragic and fraught to more harmonious. For Awakening-era Anders/Justice, I’d love some confused, ambiguous feelings at Vigil’s Keep; Justice being Anders’ knight in shining armor who also smells weird and is a possessed corpse; hijinks with the Wardens. For DA2: missing each other, fighting with each other, finding ways to communicate despite their situation? Justice's experience of love and other mortal concepts is also something I'm really interested in seeing explored.

PROMPT: Beauty and the Beast/Sleeping Beauty AU. Anders gets lost in the Blackmarsh while fleeing from Templars and finds himself trapped in a deserted village. His only companion is a man calling himself “Kristoff,” who protects Anders but refuses to let him see his face. They grow closer, Anders starts suspecting that Kristoff is under a curse, there are complications when the Baroness shows up… or however you’d like to play it! I just feel these two would lend themselves really well to a dark fairy tale AU.

-

Anders/Merrill | Anders & Merrill

Anders is so mean and weird to Merrill, and she’s so gentle with him. I would love to see something with them maybe, almost reaching a more amiable level of understanding during DA2, or something post-game where Merrill runs into Anders somewhere or rescues him or is hiding him in disguise. “Cute elves with no self-preservation instinct.” Scary Merrill who's still cheerful and sweet is one of my favorite Merrills, so... do with that what you will!

-

Anders/Carver Hawke/Merrill Anders/Male Hawke/Merrill

These selections were inspired by the Legacy DLC banter where Merrill discloses that she was searching for dirty spells in Anders’ books. I just love the idea of Merrill and her boyfriend deciding to spice up their sex life with magic!! ooh!! and Anders enduring their journey of discovery with a little less annoyance than he might outwardly express. And then it turns into a threesome… hooray?

-

Anders/Sigrun | Anders & Sigrun

I had a brilliant joke I was going to include in this section, but pierogipie said it needed work, so. Maybe someday. 

In any case: Sigrun! She’s a cute dwarf with tattoos and no self-preservation instinct, who grew up on the bottom rung of a highly stratified society, and when she meets Anders they’re in a perfect sort of “Freedom! Finally! Kind of! Let’s cause havoc” situation. I’d love them as pals daring each other to do stupid things in between darkspawn battles and misery, and I’d also love shipfic for them. Alternately: in a post-DA2 worldstate where Anders survived, how would they meet again?

-

Anders/Fenris

Last minute addition #1!

For Anders/Fenris, I will read just about anything. My tastes run a bit more towards angst, action, and humor than straight up fluff, but I'm not picky. Here are some prompts if you'd like them.

PROMPT: Anders and Fenris have to stay in a haunted house together from dusk till dawn: for money, to help Hawke win a bet, because it's the storm of the century and they can't leave, any reason.

PROMPT: Meeting in the Fade, but one doesn't recognize the other.

PROMPT: Post-DA2, Anders and Fenris meet again when both are taken captive.

PROMPT: It's six hours until Hawke's big party, and no one else is available to run their last, most desperately important errand to make sure all goes well.

-

Anders/Fenris/Sebastian Vael

Last minute addition #2!

For Anders/Fenris/Sebastian, I would love messy love triangle nonsense; a contrived scenario involving drinking games, sex pollen, or an enchantment or curse; an even more contrived scenario where one or all of them revert to their pre-game personalities; or perhaps something post-game where Sebastian is seeking vengeance and things take an unexpected turn.

Anders and Sebastian and Anders and Fenris hate each other for different reasons, while Sebastian seems to genuinely care for Fenris and consider him a friend. I'd love to see their dynamics muddied and changed by being mushed together.

#optional detailed letters for exchanges tag

[miraculan-draws]

OKAY BUT it is literally SO FUCKING OBVIOUS that Leandra favors the twins SIGNIFICANTLY, if not outright resents the eldest Hawke sibling. She tells them right after the trauma of losing a sibling to the ogre “this is YOUR fault. How could you let them charge off like that?” And THEN when you’re about to set off to the deep roads, she doesn’t beg the eldest Hawke to stay, she begs the remaining twin. She’s not even subtle with it she’s like “you, I understand wanting to do this, but do you have to bring carver/bethany?” This stings more for a mage Hawke I think, bc it is perfectly in character for the expedition to be something Carver would dive head first into. Leandra doesn’t spend one millisecond relieved to see the eldest sibling upon their return, she immediately asks where the remaining twin is.

And I think THIS has more to do with Malcolm than it does with mage hawke, but the sentiment is especially poignant if we ARE talking about a mage hawke, but Leandra doesn’t really talk about magic. It’s dictated how she’s lived a lot of her life and her children’s life and her spouses life, but she doesn’t act concerned about mage hawkes safety in regards to their status as an apostate. She suggested going to Kirkwall despite bethany, who had never set foot there, knowing from common damn knowledge that it was crawling with templar influence. In act 1 she only ever cares that you’re in debt to the smugglers/mercenaries, dislikes the idea of you being in servitude despite both Athenril and Meeran saying they need a mage and they’ll keep Hawke safe when they’re with them. She doesn’t make note of gamlen outright telling people that you’re a mage. (The person most concerned about Hawke being discovered is Carver.)

This is veering into Headcanon territory but I think the eldest Hawke sibling must remind Leandra TOO much of Malcolm. Especially a mage hawke!! It almost seems like Leandra is trying to forget him with how little he’s mentioned compared to the dead twin—and bethany is canonically wary of her own magic as well as soft spoken compared to the other two. But the eldest Hawke doesn’t even have the player options to be shameful about their magic!! Bethany says that Anders reminds her of their dad—so Malcolm as an apostate unafraid of their gifts and opinionated in the ways it should be treated. So a mage hawke, unashamed of their magic, charming and boisterous, and if you’ve played legacy you’ll hear that Malcolm Hawke and Male!Hawke have THE SAME VOICE. They sound the same!! For whatever reason, I could see Leandra resenting the eldest sibling for either not living up to the expectations she put on Malcolm, or for reminding her of Malcolm when she doesn’t want to.

#da2 #Hawke

[novemberocean]

Varric Pays a Visit

AO3

Wil and Fenris are lying low after the birth of their daughter. They get a visit from an old friend and someone else... 

(Cro and Wil universe.several years after the events of da2)

Wil Hawke lay in her bed, her arm draped around Fenris' waist. She drifted somewhere in between sleep and wakefulness. The baby burbled in her crib across the room. Rinna was awake, Wil should get up and get her. But the newborn hadn't fallen asleep until the light outside was soft, so Wil didn't see the harm in letting her entertain herself while she dozed.

When Bethany was a baby, she had always been the hardest to get to sleep, But for different reasons than Carver. Carver cried because he was dirty or hungry or any normal reasons a baby cries. Bethany cried when she was bored. When Wil had been little, she had been half convinced that baby Bethany just wanted to test their reaction time. See how long it took them to get up when she started wailing in the middle of the night.

Rinna didn't do that, but at a little under two weeks old, she only slept for a few hours at a time and ate after every nap. Fenris could do a lot of things, but breastfeed was not one of them. Wil herself was still pretty wiped out from the labor itself. Her mom had done this twice, with four times as many children. Not for the first time, she thought about her brother.

She hadn't seen or heard from Cro since he had gone away with Anders. But their connection meant that she sometimes got impressions. Sensations of heat with no discernable source. Phantom pains, and smells. She could only imagine what Cro was getting from her end.

The first Hawke twins had always been close, but the strangeness of their connection hadn't manifested until they were separated. The only time they had ever been apart was when Wil followed Carver to Ostagar. That had only been a few months. Two years since the destruction of the Kirkwall Chantry marked the longest Wil and Cro had ever been apart.

She must have fallen asleep, because next thing she knew, Fenris was getting back into bed, infant in arms. Wil trusted Fenris to be careful, so she didn't warn him about the dangers of having a newborn in the bed with them; instead, she pulled both of them closer and tried to fall back asleep.

Abruptly, there was a knock at the door. Fenris and Wil sat bolt upright, jostling Rinna. Wil gathered her daughter to her chest as she and Fenris shared a look. No one was supposed to know where they were. Not even the extremely helpful, and kind of nosey, midwife. After a swift, silent conversation, Wil handed Rinna to Fenris while she pulled on a shirt.

With one hand, Fenris pulled his sword off its hooks on the wall, Rinna in his other arm. He moved to the blind side of the door, nodding as Wil moved to open the door and confront whoever had found them. With luck, whoever it was would let their guard down, seeing an unarmed woman, not noticing Fenris with a very large sword.

But it was Wil who was caught off guard.

"Hey Hawke," Varric said, customary shit-eating grin on his face.

"Varric!" Wil exclaimed, bending to embrace the dwarf. He looked good, hair a little longer than the last time she had seen him. His shirt was still ridiculously low-cut, and Wil had never been so happy to see that chest bush.

"Varric?" Fenris asked, dropping his sword.

"Hey, Elf," Varric smiled at him over Wil's shoulder. "And that must be the Hawkelet."

Rinna stared at Varric, because babies stare at everything. Wil let him go to take her daughter from Fenris to show her to her oldest friend. Varric offered her his finger in greeting. Rinna took the proffered digit, and stuck it in her mouth.

"Varric, what are you doing here?" Wil asked. Varric held out his arms to take the infant and Wil immediately handed her over.

"What, a dwarf can't check in on his friends when they have a baby?" He smiled slyly. "Though I can't take all the credit..." He trailed off meaningfully as he looked over his shoulder.

Sheepishly scooting around the corner of the house, was Cro. His unkempt hair was made even wilder by the wind, and she was reminded of the time they were small children. He was wearing pretty nondescript clothing, not a robe, drawing attention to the fact that he was a mage. The only thing throwing off the undercover outfit, was the stripe of red across his nose and cheeks... The one that mirrored hers.

She didn't think, she just moved. One second, she was crouching in front of Varric, the next she was throwing her arms around her brother's neck. It was like he had never left. He smelled the same, felt the same, the rumble of his laugh was the same. His beard scratched her face and she was getting tears on his shirt. And it was perfect. When she finally pulled back, he had tears in his eyes too.

"Hi," Cro said, voice thick with emotion.

"Hey," Wil giggled, wetly.

"I felt something two weeks ago," Cro said, uncertainly. "I made an intuitive leap." He shrugged sheepishly. That must have been weird for him.

"How was the pregnancy for you?" She laughed as she led him inside. Cro groaned.

"Awful. Did you crave pickles? I ate so many pickles." Cro sighed and Fenris laughed.

"We almost had to learn the process of pickling, because she ate all the pickles in town." Wil swatted at Fenris but he deftly avoided her.

"No? What about Hawkeling?" Varric was trying out nicknames on the baby, who seemed perfectly content to chew on his necklace while he talked.

"You aren't even going to ask her name, before you completely disregard it?" Wil asked, slinging an arm around her brother's broad shoulders. It was a stretch, but a familiar one.

"Her name is Rinna," Cro said and Wil and Fenris whipped their heads to face him. There was no way that he could know that through the link. Was there? Cro laughed at their confusion.

"Wil, you've wanted to name a kid 'Rinna' since we were kids."

Wil blushed to the roots of her hair. Fenris raised an eyebrow at her, amused.

"If it was a boy, his name would have--" Cro continued confidently. Wil drove her heel into the back of his knee and pulled him into a headlock.

Cro cried out, laughing as his sister noogied him relentlessly.

"Well now I'm curious," Fenris commented.

"Me too, I sense a story," Varric grinned. Wil stopped her assault to point at them.

"You're next," she glared. Neither looked very scared. Rinna shrieked in amusement and Wil let Cro go.

"Little bird wants to know too," Varric said, brandishing the infant like evidence. Rinna laughed again as Wil scooped her up.

"She liked that one," Cro said as he drew along side Wil to look at his niece.

"Little Bird it is," Varric agreed.

#dragon age #da2 #wil hawke #cro hawke #varric tethras #baby fic #i havent posted in a while #i enjoy writing varric #older hawke twins #writing #my write #fenris/hawke #fenris/femhawke #femhawke x fenris #mention of anders/male hawke