#medical textbook images to get tormented by | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sleepinabath · 3 years

Text

“What happened this morning?”

Warnings: insecurities, body image,

Story Length: 2k

Summary: You are the kindest person of your year. Always lifting up others and giving a hand whenever possible. Behind the front you are insecure and broken. You never show anyone your pain, but one day after speeding out of the great hall Draco sees a glimpse of your hidden side.

A/N: This is my first imagine on tumblr. Let me know if I should make a part 2. (not my gif btw)

Y/n l/n was a kind Hufflepuff 5th year. She was the person that partnered with the new kid, the person who was positive through the tough times, the person anyone could come to judgement free, the person who always reminded her friends that they were perfect and beautiful. But when the sun went down and no one was there to tell her about their problems her mind filled with terrible thoughts. While everybody else in the castle was dreaming, y/n was reminded of all the things she hated about herself, all the things that made her less beautiful, all the things that she thought others hated about her. Fortunately y/n was good at hiding her pain, she attempted much more around her current boyfriend, Draco Malfoy, and so no one realized that all her happiness and confidence was a façade.

Coincidentally that façade had gotten her the boyfriends she tries too hard to hide from. When he confessed his feelings for her she asked why. Why would Draco Malfoy, the Prince of Slytherin want her, a simple Hufflepuff?

“For so many reasons y/n, too many to count. For starters you are beautiful, and positive...”

That is where y/n stopped listening. Her faux optimism had landed her a boy that almost every girl in the school swooned over.

Tonight was no different. Y/n pictured the scenario that had tormented her during her waking hours and disrupted her sleep. Draco Malfoy walking into the great hall with Pansy Parkinson on his arm. They would walk over to her house table and reveal her deepest darkest insecurities. The remarks weren’t the same every time. Some times Malfoy would touch on Y/n’s body issues saying:

“How could I ever date anyone that fat?”

“The moment I saw your body it was over.”

Sometime Parkinson would strike on her insecurity around cheating by saying things like:

“Did you really think he could have liked you? You were a cute charity case.”

and

“Did you not wonder why he never went further?”

Always after they spewed their hate and walked away the entire hall would begin to laugh and some of her closest friends would agree or worse point out how stupid she was to think that Malfoy would actually like her. Every time this played out in Y/n’s head she would cry.

Tonight Y/n decided to go into the dorms bathroom so as not to wake up her dorm mates. She looked at her red cheeks and puffy eyes and began to agree with the dream Parkinson and Draco. Y/n began to examine her body, only making; her cry harder as she traced her finger along the few stretch marks Y/n had on her hips and thighs, pulling on the little fat that clung to her calves and stomach. At this point y/n had ran out of tears and was exhausted, stepping out of the bathroom she looked around at the other beds. All these girls were beautiful and thin.

Why can’t I be like that?

Why can’t I have a body and face that I like?

~~~

Waking up the next morning y/n saw all her tired dorm mates starting their day as well. Some were brushing their teeth and humming a tune, some were picking out their outfit, and some like y/n were just waking up. You got out of bed reluctantly and started choosing your outfit for the day. Your options were all very similar, big jeans and a t-shirt with your robes. You decided on your favorite pair of white wash blue jeans and one of your dad’s old band shirts. You and all your roommates finished your respective morning rituals at around the same time and then walked to the great hall together for breakfast.

Y/n ate about the same thing everyday for breakfast, an egg, berries, and if she was really hungry a piece of toast with jam. Beginning to eat everyone started talking about classes and homework, the usual beginning of day complaints or excitement. You added to these conversations while also watching the hall door to see when Draco walked in and if he walked in with anyone.

Soon after you and your friends came into the hall Draco came in. He was accompanied by his standard group, Crabbe, Goyle, Zabinni, but today along with the usual crowd there was Pansy Parkinson right alongside him. Your heart dropped, you felt as though you were going to throw up. You didn’t let your feelings show on your face.

“Y/n what do you think will be more important on the herbology exam? Labeling or purpose?” asked her dorm mate, Diane.

“Uh… I believe that Professor Sprout said the test would be 50/50.” y/n said coming out of your thoughts.

“Well I’m fucked. I only know the practical.”

“Come to study group tonight. We would love to have you.”

“Thank y/n. You’re the best.” y/n had stopped paying attention at that point. y/n was trying not to notice as Pansy and Draco laughed together. It all became too much when she laid her hand on his forearm.

“Hey, I think I left something in the dorm. I’ll meet you guys in class?” y/n was just barely keeping her voice level. They all bid her goodbye and she walked very quickly out of the hall.

Tears were starting to spill from her eyes down y/n’s cheeks when she heard footsteps behind her. Y/n began to walk quicker trying to get as far away as possible from anyone.

You’re being so stupid. Crying over a boy

She was just trying to make you jealous, and you fell for it

She could not let anyone see her cry. Y/n was the confident, nice, Hufflepuff, and if someone saw her breakdown it would put into question anything she had ever said, every bit of advice would be watered down by doubt.

“Y/N!” This made her stop dead. It was Draco. She wanted to run until she was in the common room, run until he had given up, but y/n knew that Draco wouldn’t give up. Even if he had lost her in this moment he would bring it up again until he figured out what was troubling her. She didn’t run, but stopped quickly whipping her eyes and taking deep breaths as Draco caught up to her.

“Hey, what up?” Y/n said doing her best to sound nonchalant.

“You left the hall…” he paused now looking at your face.

“Good observation.” she faked a laugh. She wanted him to go away so that she could cry in peace.

“Are you okay?”

“Of course.” Y/n moved to leave but he grabbed her wrist.

“Yes?” her voice broke a little.

“Have you been crying?” he face was painted with concern

“No, just allergies. I was actually just about to-” a tear rolled down her face. “To get my allergy medication but...” It was all y/n could do to keep the sobbs out of her voice.

“Hey-”

“Draco I really need to go.” y/n knew that she wouldn’t be able to keep her tears in much longer. Walking away she felt the tears fall fast and hot down her cheeks. Thankfully Draco didn’t follow her.

~~~

Y/n missed her first class of the day. She made up an excuse to her friends about being nauseous.

“Are you sure you want to go to class y/n?” Her roommate Diane said as you all walked to potions.

“Yeah, I’m fine now.” Y/n said quickly.

“Whatever you say.”

Y/n’s second lesson of the day was double potions with the Slytherins. When you walked into class you avoided his piercing gaze. She knew that Draco would try to talk to you during class. To bypass his awkward questions you sat next to one of her friends named Annalise.

“Not sitting with Draco?” Annalise asked.

“I can hangout with Draco any old time. Besides he’s not great shakes at potions.” y/n said this while pulling out your potions textbook

She made it through potions without having to speak to Draco. She was feeling more confident that he would drop it until you were leaving class. Y/n was walking with all your friends when she felt something cold wrap around her hand. She stopped creating a ripple effect among the crowd she had been enveloped in.

“Can I speak to you?” Draco asked in a low voice.

“Hey, I’ll meet you in class.” Y/n said to her friends. They all giggled as you two walked away. She didn’t feel like laughing at all. She felt like throwing up. The last thing she wanted to do was talk to Draco about what happened this morning. Draco pulled you into an empty classroom, and began to pace.

“What’s up?” y/n said cooly.

“What happened?” he stopped his pacing to ask.

“Nothing, I just wasn’t feeling well.” she moved to him. She tried to comfort him by rubbing his arm. He moved away from his gesture.

“Bullshit.” he didn’t yell, but said it fervently.

Y/n didn’t have anything to say. Half of her wanted to break down in front of him, too cry and tell him all the things that plagued her mind by night. The other half of her wanted to leave the room and make him so mad that he forgot about all things that had happened this morning. Y/n couldn’t bring herself to do either, so she just stood there in silence.

“What happened this morning?”

“Nothing. I just wasn’t feel-” y/n began to lie again but Draco cut her off.

“What’ the real reason?” he said looking at her with a mix of caring and frustration

“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” Draco’s only response was an irritated sigh. y/n was also starting to get annoyed. Why couldn’t he just drop it. It wasn’t as if the real reason mattered greatly.

“You know what I realized today.”

“Enlighten me.”

“You have never once cried in front of me. You haven’t even confided a negative thought.”

“Because I don’t need to.” y/n stated flatly looking at her feet.

“Your telling me you have never once had a negative thought?” Draco asked doubtfully.

“Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“So if you do have other emotions besides inspirational, why have I never heard about them?”

“Because... Because I’m an optimist.”

“Optimist or not, no one can bottle up their emotions before losing their minds eventually.” She couldn’t think of anything to say. Y/n knew he was right. She had been so broke and defeated for so long now. All Y/n could think to do was continue looking at her shoes because she knew that if she met his eye she wouldn’t be able to hold it together.

“Look at me... please.” y/n could hear the concern all through his voice. Slowly she turned her face to his. Y/n was determined not to break down and just go to herr next class.

“We should go to class.” she said weakly barely meeting Draco’s eye.

“Class can wait, you can’t.” he spoke soberly which made it more confusing for him when Y/n giggled.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that if you knew what was going on up here.” She pointed to her forehead. “You wouldn’t have said that.” Draco moved swiftly to her and put his forehead to hers.

“I want to know. I want to know it all. Every dark and twisted thought to your wildest dreams and fantasies. I want to know everything if you’ll tell me.”

#draco lucius malfoy #draco malfoy #draco x y/n #draco x reader #draco #harry potter #harry potter fandom #wizarding world

26 notes · View notes